#like hey i did it once what's once more gonna do
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Me and my buddy get along well but I don’t have a father and for some reason I feel like I look up to him. He’s a brunette hockey player who really cares about his body and tracks all of his cals. Any way you could spike one of his beers and give me the best exjock dad ever?
“Let’s go!” Your bro throws down his game controller and looks over at you. His confident smile adorning his handsome, angular face, “I used that same move on the ice the other day.” His clear excitement is infectious and you can’t help but smile.
It was another one of your usual game nights with your bro. The two of you sitting on the couch, controllers in hand, playing some hockey videogame. And even though he always seemed to win, you just enjoy the moment. Your friendship started out when you were younger- the two of you meeting in grade school. And as the years went on, you grew closer. You’d go to his hockey games and cheer him on. He’d fill in as that male role model you needed. When you went to college, he’d continue playing hockey, while you focused on your studies. But you continued to enjoy each other’s company. But this was your last year, and he planned to move across the country. The very thought was painful. Losing him would be tough.
“Hey, you good?” He asks, “I told you I wasn’t going easy.”
You smile, “I was wondering,” You begin, “I know you don’t like beer...”
“Gotta keep these toned.” He says, running a hand down his exposed abs.
“But it’s bro night.” You continue, “I got some special beers for us.”
He seems to consider the offer. Part of him looking a bit apprehensive. After all, he spent much of his time focusing on maintaining his body. His lean muscles and thicc hockey butt were all products of his careful diet and dedicated workouts. But he could tell it would mean a lot to you. He nods slowly.
“One won’t hurt.” He says with a grin, “Cheers to another game night.”
Part of you feels relieved. Another part of you feels somewhat apprehensive. If the man you bought this beer from was telling you the truth... well, you didn’t know what to think. It was probably some prank anyway, and you probably wasted the money. You hand him a solo cup with the beer in it.
“To bro night.” He smiles and takes a sip of the beer, “You know, I’m gonna miss this.” You feel a pang of sadness in your chest, “But we’ll always be bros.”
You nod, taking in his words. Feeling a sense of impending loss. Wishing you could just enjoy these moments forever.
“I’m gonna miss this too... dad.”
He looks over at you and raises an eyebrow, “What did you just call me?” He chuckles.
And you can see it. A few hairs starting to emerge from his once clean-shaven face. A few greys appearing in his brunette locks. Was it true? Was this stuff really going to do what the man said it would?
“Nothing, dad.”
And as the words leave your lips, your buddy groans. His youthful skin starts to lose its glow. A few wrinkles appear on his forehead. And the hair on his face sprouts into a full beard. His hands rush to scratch his new facial hair and his eyes widen.
“Bro, what the hell...” He whispers, “Something’s wrong...”
“What do you mean, dad?”
You watch as his brunette locks begin to recede and his tan vanishes. All the while, small, itchy hairs start to sprout from your buddy’s chest and abs. At this point, he stands up and runs his hands down his new body hair. There’s a look of disgust and confusion on his face, and you can’t help but feel bad for him. After all, he did pride his clean-shaven look.
“You keep calling me dad.” He says, staring at you, “And now...” He catches a glimpse of his receding hairline and aged skin in the mirror, “Bro, please. Whatever you’re doing, you gotta fuckin’ stop.”
You could tell he was getting angry. But you were still marveling over the effects of this drink. You couldn’t believe it was actually working.
“Bro, are you even listening to me?” He says, “Please! You can’t...”
“Sorry dad.” You reply, putting even more emphasis on “dad.”
The effects are more dramatic. Your buddy lets out a pained moan and falls to his knees, gripping his abs. You can see tears fall from his eyes as he realizes his firm abs are feeling softer. And in only a few moments, his abs are covered by a thick layer of fat. And another. And another. And although your buddy is too busy squeezing his new flabby stomach, you can see his pecs fill with fat and sag, resting atop his new gut.
“This can’t be...” He winces at his new, gravelly voice, “Oh god, I sound so old.” He looks up at you, tears still staining his eyes, “Dude, come on... please... I can’t be this.”
A part of you feels bad, even guilty. Your friend’s anger replaced by fear. His confidence shattered. His toned physique truly replaced by that of a middle-aged dad. Part of you wants to reverse this. But you don’t even know how.
“I...” You bite your lip, “Look, I don’t even know if I can undo this, dad.”
Your buddy shuts his eyes and shakes as the short hairs erupt into longer follicles. You watch as a forest of hairs emerge from under his shorts and travel down his legs. His new gut and soft chest are covered in a forest of gray and dark hairs. And you realize now there’s nothing left of your old buddy, at least physically. His receding hairline, gray hairs, gut, and hirsute form all scream middle-aged dad. He slowly stands up, wincing at a pain in his lower back and knees, as he becomes more familiar with his new age.
“Dude...” He whispers, “What did you do?” You can hear the anger return to his voice.
“I didn’t want to lose you, bro.” You say, “And I’ve always looked up to you. And truthfully, I’ve always wanted a dad and the beer promised it could do that. Just as long as I called whoever drank it dad.” Your friend looks shocked and picks up the solo cup.
“Good one dude.” He laughs, “Okay, okay you got me. Maybe if I drink the beer and you call me bro or something, I can return to normal.” He says hopefully, “I promise we can forget all about this.” The desperation starts to creep back into his voice, “Just... please I don’t want this.” He begs.
You’re not a bad person. You even feel a bit guilty. And part of you even wants to do as he suggests. But another thought enters your head. Would he be able to forget all about this? Would he forgive you? You bite your lip and sigh.
“I’m sorry,” You can see his eyes widen in terror, “Dad.”
He drops the beer in his hand, causing the beer inside to spray everywhere. His eyes glaze over and his jaw goes slack. A part of you worries for a moment, but slowly he smiles. There’s no evidence of concern on his face.
“Ah sorry, I spaced out there for a second.” He chuckles, “Looks like I made a mess.” He goes to bend over to pick up the cup, but winces, “Damn back’s been acting up.”
“Don’t worry dad.” You say as he sits back down on the couch, “How’re you feeling?”
“I’m good, I’m good.” He reassures, “Come on, we have to finish our game.” He says with a grin, grabbing the game controller, “You know, I was quite the hockey player back in my day. Well before this.” He chuckles, patting his beer gut.
“I know.” You reply, sitting next to him, “You tell me all the time.” The two of you start to play, and you immediately notice his videogame skills are not where they used to be. But you’re enjoying this moment- going on as if nothing changed.
“Look at that!” He cheers when he scores a goal, “I told you not to take it easy on me, son.”
You go to reply but you feel a warmth coarse through your body. You quickly shake your head and return to the game. And only a few minutes later, he scores another goal.
“You doing okay there, son?” He asks.
And again, you feel a warmth coarse through your body. You look down at the controller and can’t help but notice that your forearms look a bit thicker- your hands meatier. You shake your head and look up at your dad.
“Uh, I’m good dad.” Your voice even sounds deeper- somewhat dumb too, “I-I gotta go to my room.”
You stumble towards your room, feeling somewhat off balance. Entering your room, you’re immediately hit by the smell of intense BO. The same way your bro would smell after a hockey game. There’s gear on your bed and random posters of hockey players on your walls. You barely have time to comprehend what’s going on, when you hear your dad’s voice.
“Hey son, are you okay?”
You groan as your muscles begin to contract violently and your shirt tears from your growing musculature. You can see yourself in the mirror- abs, thicc ass, and lean muscles- the body of a hockey player. And you realize that you’re becoming your dad’s ideal son. Somehow, the beer that splashed on you had the same effects as drinking it.
“Wait dad!” You call out, wincing at the oafish jock-like tone that saturates your words, “Please...!”
“Son?” He asks opening the door.
And your eyes glaze over. Your jaw goes slack. And you feel your mind warping and changing. Any memories you had of your old life or self are being forced into the very back of your mind- all to make room for your new existence as a smelly, ripped, hockey jock. Your dad’s perfect son.
“God it reeks in here.” Your dad laughs, patting you on the back, “Must be workin’ hard out there.”
“You fuckin’ know it.” You reply, eyes dull, “It’s gonna be a good game tomorrow, pops.”
“You learned from the best, champ.” He smiles, “Now come on, we got a game to finish.” You smile, “I want to show you one of my favorite moves. Worked every time. Maybe you can try it out on the ice tomorrow.”
“For sure, pops.”
You follow your dad back to the couch. The two of you playing videogames late into the night, filling the air with boisterous cheers as you played. You couldn’t have asked for a better dad. And he couldn’t have asked for a better son.
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Jason Todd x childhood friend fem
fluff and potential angst
Jason runs into childhood friend from befor he died and she recognizes him
Back in Time
[ Jason Todd x Childhood Best Friend!Reader ]
~ Fluff, Maybe a little hurt/comfort, WC: 1,089
~ I'm so sorry this took so long 😭 Every time I went to write this it's like all ideas flew out of my head, but I finally got it done and I hope it meets your expectations<3
"Jason?"
He freezes.
He wasn't expecting to hear your voice today.
He wasn't expecting to hear your voice ever again.
Once he came back, you were gone.
He would say he tried to look for you but that isn't true. He thought your leaving was the universe telling him to leave you alone.
But now you're here. You're here and you recognize him. He doesn't know how to respond. He knows you know he heard you, otherwise he wouldn't have stopped moving.
The first thing he hears in your voice is the sadness. Not anger like he would've expected. Not even a hint of confusion. Just something sad.
After a minute of him being unmoving, clearly lost in his thoughts, he felt a tap on his shoulder.
"Jason." You say.
This time it's not a question.
After he hears you a second time, he brings himself to turn around and look at you.
"Hey."
"Hey." He can't tell if you're about to cry or smile.
"I'm sorry." He immediately apologizes. Maybe for leaving or maybe for not finding you. He's not quite sure.
"For what?" You ask and take a deep breath.
He sees the way tears form in your eyes and has the strange urge to cry himself.
"I don't know. I just feel like I need to."
"You don't. Dick told me what happened. That's not something you need to be sorry for." You say it so surely he doesn't know how to respond.
"I was gonna find you."
"That's not your job. I mean a phone call would've been nice." You shrug and let out a small, awkward chuckle.
"I didn't know what to do." He tells you quietly.
"I would assume." You look around the sidewalk you're on. You're standing in front of what looks like a busy shop, people walk in and out every couple seconds.
"Where did you go?" He asks you after a moment. Probably to determine whether or not he could've found you.
"I was here. I mean I stayed in Gotham just not where I was before."
"If I had known you were so close I would've gone to you but when they told you left I assumed-"
"Jason, you don't have to defend yourself." You cut him off quickly, "If I died and came back the last thing on my list would be finding someone who left."
He nods. "This might be easier if you were at least a little mad." He smiles softly at you, watching more tears shine in your eyes.
"I missed you too much to be mad right now."
He goes to say something back but someone walking by bumps into your shoulder.
"Maybe we should get coffee or something?" He suggests, not wanting to keep blocking the sidewalk traffic.
"Are you free?"
"Oh yeah, yeah." Dick can wait, he thinks to himself.
"Then yeah, coffee sounds great."
You both walk into the coffee shop and order whatever drinks sound good. Jason chooses a table against the wall and by a giant window.
You sit awkwardly in silence as you both try and think of what to say.
"How are you doing?" You ask, after multiple minutes of nothing.
"I'm okay, I think." He shrugs and takes a sip of his drink. You take notice of his fingers tapping nervously along the side of the cup.
"That's good." You nod and sigh.
"How are you?"
"I've been better." You answer honestly. Your fingers also tap nervously along your cup.
"I'm sorry. I don't know why this is so weird."
You laugh at his words, "I do. It's been a while."
"And I'm guessing we've both changed." He smiles.
"Changed? No shit Jason, look at you." You smile at him in a reassuring way. You can clearly see how dying has changed him.
"Yeah I guess I did get a little taller." He jokes and shakes his head.
"Maybe just an inch or two." You play along, laughing as you speak.
"I missed this. I missed you." He tells you with a sudden seriousness in his tone.
"Well good thing it isn't going away this time." You reach across the table and grab his hand.
It was never unusual for you and Jason to be touchy. That's just the kinda friendship you had. But this feels different.
Instead of being a friendly touch between best friends, it's more like a reassurance that's he's actually alive. A piece of you feels relief that you're not imagining this.
"I really hope so." He wishes with a frown.
"It won't. If you think I'm leaving your side anytime soon you're very very wrong."
"What's one more person to the gang that follows me everywhere?" He laughs again and squeezes your hand. It's the first time he's felt so free to last in a while.
"Where is that gang by the way? I would've expected one of them to be here by now."
"Oh I left while they weren't looking. I needed time to myself."
"You snuck out? Jason, they're probably panicking." You scold him softly.
"It's fine I'm meeting with Dick later."
You shake your head in disapproval but a smile on your face gives you away once again.
For some reason no matter how sad you are, a smile can't leave your lips.
You fall back into a silence but this time it's not awkward at all. It's a comfortable silence that reminds you of old times.
"I should probably get going. Dick will be pissed if I'm late."
"Yeah I don't doubt it." You recall the many times Dick has given long lectures about being late to anything he's involved in.
"I'll call you." He swears, standing up from his seat at the table.
"You better. I know where to find you." You stand up as well and finish off your drink.
"Yes you do." He agrees but doesn't leave.
You stand together in front of your table. Both of you are waiting for the other to move first.
Just as you're about to make the move to leave he steps forward and pulls you into a hug.
You immediately hug back and feel the tears reappear in your eyes.
"I really missed you." He whispers.
"I really missed you too." You whisper back.
You savor every moment of the embrace. Not wanting to leave out of fear that he would leave again.
But as you watch him walk away to meet with his brother, you're overcome with the happiness of knowing your best friend is here.
#jason todd headcanon#jason todd fanfic#jason todd fanfiction#jason todd fic#childhood best friend jason todd#jason todd i love you#jason todd#jason todd comfort#jason todd drabble#jason todd fluff#jason hurt/comfort#jason todd is my life#jason todd loves his gf#jason todd prompt#jason todd soft#jason todd thoughts#jason todd x fem reader#jason todd x fem!reader#jason todd x female!reader#jason todd x gender neutral reader#jason todd x gn!reader#jason todd x reader#jason todd x y/n#jason todd x you#red hood fluff#red hood imagine#red hood x reader#red hood fanfic#red hood#red hood fanfiction
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funny seeing you here | Drew Starkey x black!fem reader
summary: after seven months of not seeing his face, you find yourself at the same party he’s at. And he clearly made it his mission to be noticed by you. So what are you gonna do now?
warnings: alcohol consumption, suggestive smut
a/n: Here's part 3 of nothing to say when heaven falls. As the title called it, it was 100% inspired by ‘funny seeing you here’ by Jack Harlow which I recommend listening to during the reading. Comments and reblogs are never required but always very much appreciated 🫶🏻
dividers by: @/saradika-graphics
"Hey," he said and you could barely hear the smile on his voice. "I didn't expect to see you here tonight."
No escape.
"Hi," you replied with a low voice, unsure if he had heard it over the loud music. "Yeah, I'm with Frankie."
"Uh, yeah, I saw her," he voices as he scoots slightly closer to you. "This does look more like her scene."
At that, you nod and mentally curse the fifth generation of this damned bartender who has yet to finish your drinks.
Everything around you is spiraling at this point. You were not ready for this, especially with how casual he's being about everything. It was not in your plans to run into him tonight and all you wanted was to get as far away from him as you could.
Your salvation comes in the shape of your friend, who you can see right past her excitement about how much she just wanted to take you out of that situation. She held your arm lightly and, it was as if you weren't waiting for almost ten minutes the bartender returned with both your drinks.
"Hey, uhm, what's taking so long?" Frankie says and pretends to be shocked when she looks up at Drew. "Oh hey! Long time, no see." As the words leave her mouth you notice how the stiff smile on her face shows her displeasure at his presence.
"Hi Frankie," he says a little taken back by her and you notice how he starts tapping his fingers against the glass the same way you were doing moments ago. A shared habit that the both of you didn't get to brush off of one another it seems.
"Let's go, babes! I still have so much to tell you."
With your drinks at hand, you followed her and immediately felt a weight fall off of your shoulders. Still, you weren't able to hold back and you looked over your shoulder just to see him checking you out.
Your face was burning after that and you just prayed to whatever God that Frankie was able to distract you enough to make you not act on the alcohol in your veins.
It wasn't a secret to anyone the effect that he had on you. I mean you were together for years and about to get married - obviously, you had to be attracted to him. And he just had this thing about him that made it very hard for you to ignore.
He looked handsome, but that was no surprise. He always looked so fine, except this time it seemed like he had filled out more. The black shirt he was wearing fitted him perfectly, the sleeves stretched around his biceps, and even from a glimpse you were able to notice how much bigger they were since you last saw him. His outgrown hair now looked more like a growing mullet and, god, that did work with him. At this point, you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or your brain talking about how insanely good he looked.
“Y/N, honey, you good?” She asked once the both of you got back to your spot.
“Yeah, yeah. Sure, why wouldn’t I be?” You retorted to which she just stared at you with uncertainty.
“I don’t- I don’t know, you just looked like you were about to vanish in thin air back there,” she voices smoothly still looking at you.
“Yeah, I uh, I guess I just wasn’t expecting that to happen,” you confess.
She nods and sips on her drink, her own eyes scanning the room this time, and once she looks up at you once more you see a glimpse of regret there.
“I didn’t know. Had I known I wouldn’t have brought you here,” She declares with sorrow and you shake your head quickly.
“Hey, I know that! Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.”
At that, neither of you is sure enough.
You could feel that it was way past one in the morning, the air just felt different. The party was less crowded but the music was still blaring through the speakers. Frankie was entertained in a talk with a tall dark-skinned man who was whispering in her ear every now and then earning giggles from the brunette.
You had been nursing the drink in your hand for a while now, the condensation around the glass caused your fingertips to be wet. You were much more drunk than you’d normally get, but for once in a long time it felt good to let yourself go.
Still the numbness the alcohol brought, did not evade the feeling of what happened earlier. It had been so long since the last time and you were not expecting to see him like that. What would’ve happened if Frankie had not interrupted him? What would you have done?
“Hey,” You heard Frankie’s voice closer to your ear this time, “Would you mind if I left for a while? I promise I’ll be back and you won’t even notice.”
It amazed you that even with the amount of drinks she had, her pleading eyes didn’t fail to convince you. And honestly, she needed to have fun with the hot guy as well. So with a nod you sent her off watching her excitement as she followed him.
At least you were alone with your thoughts and could think and rethink everything, from your coffee orders to your love life as you downed the last of your blue coloured drink. But as if they were trying to prove a point, the spot next to you did not remain empty for long.
The same cologne that woke forbidden memories hours ago was flooding your space once again but this time it was subtle. Almost as if it was fading and taking with it your sanity.
“I thought we’d never get the chance to talk again,” was what he said and it didn’t take you long to notice that he too was a few drinks in.
Guess this isn’t a sober conversation, huh.
“I’d rather if it stays like that,” you mumbled as you watched him push a bottle of cold water towards you.
“Come on, this is a quieter spot. I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while now,” He leans in, just like Trent did with Frankie.
It felt so weird being close to him like this after so long. It felt like getting something you’ve wanted for so long but you were scared that you got the wrong thing. Does that even make sense?
“How's your sister and your niece?” You asked since there was no escape.
“They’re fine. Both of them, Lily still cries a lot but they’re good,” he voices as he sips from his own drink.
You unscrew the water bottle and take a big gulp out of it. Why were your hands so sweaty now? You didn’t have an answer to that so you just nodded and looked around the room as less and less people filled the dance floor and the bar.
“You look beautiful,” his compliment breaks the silence and goes straight to those confusing thoughts you were having. You have to control yourself. “I thought a lot before talking to you earlier, but I just couldn’t help myself when you looked like this. So pretty”
Even with his sweet words you couldn’t forget who he was and the history between the two of you. It was hard because even if you denied it a part of you still missed him so much. I mean, you shared years of your life with him so it isn’t that easy to ignore how much his absence affects you sometimes.
“What are you doing here, Drew?” The words leave your mouth before you could even process the thought.
He doesn’t say anything for a while and you finally look at him. His hair was slightly darker than it was months ago, the low cut shirt he is wearing gives you a peak of his chest hair and some freckles he has there. Looking into his eyes made your blood freeze for a second, it was like you were drowning in the bluest sea.
He scratched his overgrown beard while he looked down at the cup he was drinking from.
“I miss you,” He confesses with a sigh.
You shake your head as you set the water bottle back on the table.
“No, you can’t do this now,” You say and pray that he can hear you over the music. “Not after everything.”
“I-I fucked up and I know that,” he admits and that makes you feel dizzy. “I want to make things right between us.”
“Oh, now? You don’t even know if I have someone,” you scoff. “How’s Odessa by the way?”
“I wouldn’t know. It’s been a while since I last talked to her,” he says.
“Well so it’s best if I look over your shoulder since she might pop up from thin air,” your snide remark doesn’t go unnoticed by him but he doesn’t say anything.
“I’m not here to talk about anyone else but us. So can we please do that? Let’s find somewhere where we can actually talk because you just left and I know that what I did was the radon to that, but still.”
Your eyes met his for the second time that night and without much thought you found yourself nodding. You texted Frankie letting her know that you’d be getting an Uber home so she didn’t have to worry about you and in the next second you were following your ex out of the club.
It didn’t shock you that he was still living in the apartment you used to share. It looked almost the same just a few new pieces of furniture decorating the space and you couldn’t help but ask yourself if she had helped him to pick them out.
“Do you, uhm, wanna drink something?” He asked after he locked the door behind you.
“Yeah, I could use a glass of water.”
“Okay, lemme get that for you,” he says and walks to the kitchen.
You stay in the living room and take it all in. Why does his house feel this warm? Why did you feel comfortable in a place you chose to leave? Why wasn’t this freaking you out anymore? Before you could begin to dwell in any of those questions, his footsteps against the wooden floor pulled you from your thoughts.
“Here,” he hands you the filled glass.
“Thanks,” you say before taking a small sip from it.
“So, how have you been?” He asks and you can see that he immediately regrets it, “Fuck that’s a stupid question.”
You can’t help but chuckle at that and he quickly follows suit.
“I am okay. I’ve been worse, I’ve been better” you admit to which he only nods.
“I felt like shit, you know? I knew I was fucking up but I was so entranced by everything that was happening that I didn’t realize how much it was affecting you,” he says as he leans against the wall.
“It wasn’t easy for me to come up to you and say those things but I was so fed up that I didn’t know what to do anymore,” you admit as you take a step closer to him without even realising.
“I’m sorry. I never wanted you to feel like I didn’t care about you or your feelings.”
“I guess I just didn’t want to be an intruder in our own relationship. There was a point where I felt like I needed to talk to her to get to you. And I know there is history between you two, I just didn’t want to doubt that there was still something going on.”
You sigh as one of your fingers traced the rim of the glass.
“I mean, there were a few times that I called your phone and she was the one picking it up. That made me feel so insecure and so scared that I was being lied to.”
“I-what? I didn’t know that.” He truly seemed surprised by your words.
“Well,” you scoff as you shake your head, “I guess she never told you that I called you then.”
You turn around and put the glass on the centre table. He simply watched you and even if he might not admit it yet seeing you in his house again made something in chest warm. Something in him just told him that you belonged there.
“You see, this is what I am talking about.” You add without turning to look at him. “This shouldn’t be normal.”
“I really didn’t know and when I looked at my calls registry your name wasn’t there so I assumed she was telling the truth.”
He did feel guilty about that, but he wasn’t lying. He truly didn’t know of that happenstance.
You sigh and you look back at him, your eyes burning as you feel a deep sense of deja vu.
“I really thought you were it for me, you know?” You confess and a tear streams down your face.
As if it was a reflex thing, he immediately reaches for you and wipes the tear off your face.
“I am so sorry. You didn’t deserve any of that,” he says looking into your eyes.
You didn’t know if it was the alcohol or the vulnerability that enveloped the both of you, but you couldn’t help more tears from following that first one. It felt so calming to be talking about this with him after so long, like a ton was being taken out of your chest. Obviously you had people to talk to but it wasn’t the same.
You rested your head on his shoulder as his hands were on the back of your neck. He went in for the first touch, his lips kissed the top of your head. That made you tense up for a second and as you looked up your gaze was immediately captured by his.
His nose touched yours first and as he leaned in for your lips, you couldn’t help but pull back. That happened twice more and you knew that he was frustrated but you were just so scared of opening up to him again.
“Please,” he begs with a breathy voice and as you look into his eyes you are able to see the same man you fell in love with years ago.
After that you didn’t resist anymore and his lips quickly found yours.
Oh.
One of his hands cradled your face as he deepened the kiss and the other was occupied squeezing the softness of your hips. Now, you could’ve lied to yourself about many things, but this was never one of them. He knew exactly where to touch you and how to do it.
You pressed your body against his and the sigh that left your lips when you felt his bulge pressed on your stomach. He moaned on your lips at the pressure and in a blink of an eye you had your legs wrapped around him.
He now held you with one of his arms as he guided the both of you towards the bedroom. His lips didn’t leave yours, the only time he broke the kiss was when he pulled your lower lip between his teeth, but in the next second he was devouring them again.
When he reached the bedroom he didn’t bother to close the door. He laid you on the bed and you breathlessly watched him pull his shirt off with one hand before he knelt between your legs.
Please God, don’t make me regret this.
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#drew starkey#drew starkey x reader#rafe cameron x reader#drew starkey x black reader#drew starkey x female reader#drew starkey x y/n#drew starkey x you#Drew starkey x fem reader#rafe cameron#rafe obx
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all equestria girl | percy jackson
ღ percy jackson x daughter of ares! reader ღ warnings: none! ღ wc: 558
“I’m not gonna let you fall, ok?” Percy tried to free his hand from his girlfriend's tight grip, but she didn’t seem willing to let go. She looked down at him, eyes wide with terror and fear.
She looked beautiful, though he wouldn’t tell her that (he felt he’d probably get a punch if he did in this situation.)
“Do you trust me?” he giggled while he rubbed her leg, watching as she nodded her head from side to side.
“No!”
Just a few weeks back, they’d gone on a small mission that required them to fly on the winged stallion… She’d ended up with a concussion and a broken rib. That says enough.
He’d begged her to learn to ride Blackjack. Or, at the very least, any regular horse. Percy felt it was up to him to make sure that next time, she’d be prepared to manage it –you know, horses are his thing.
She’d waved it off, saying she only panicked and would be totally fine next time. But he insisted.
Ha, ha. Funny.
Once she got on, she was convinced that falling from that height would be the end of her. Also, something told her the horse was jealous of her. He wasn’t looking in her direction and she could swear he was struggling not to push her to the ground.
And then Percy told her he’d let go and tell the horse to take off flying.
What? Who does he think she is, Zorro?
“Percy, if you let me go I-”
The horse snorted and shuffled a bit. Percy looked downright offended, gave Blackjack a pat on the back, and said: “Hey, is my girlfriend you’re talking about!”
“What did he just say?” Yes, the horse hated her. It’d probably take off and dive headfirst or pull some stunt to get rid of her.
“That you’re stunning." He left a small kiss on her leg and patted it, slowly backing away.
The horse gave another sharp snort. Percy rolled his eyes and patiently continued teaching the girl the basics.
Not long after, he felt confident she’d be okay and gave Blackjack the green light to start flying. The horse rose into the sky, and Percy smiled.
But that smile faded when he heard his girlfriend’s screams and saw the horse disappearing among the clouds.
How lovely, they both seemed to get along... just fine.
“How– Oh wow”
Percy watched as the girl nearly crashed to the ground when the horse landed, stumbling backwards as quickly as she could. Her hair was a disaster, completely covering her eyes and puffed up to an absurd degree.
The horse didn’t look any happier, stepping away from her and shaking itself, as if she were some kind of contagion.
Everyone stayed quiet, not sure what to do or say.
Percy walked slowly toward his girlfriend, lowering his head to meet her eyes. She raised her head sharply, pointing at the horse with an accusing finger, which looked at her in surprise.
"Mrs. O'Leary is way cooler than that bitch!"
"I like Rachel better than her." She only heard a sound, but seeing Percy’s expression, she instantly knew it wasn’t a compliment.
She attempted to move toward the horse, but her boyfriend pulled her back by the waist.
"What did he say? What did that awful, nasty furry monster say?" Blackjack spun around, kicked up some dirt, and began to walk away from them, leaving them covered in dust.
Percy was beyond surprised, struggling to believe that for once, he wasn’t the one acting foolish in the relationship.
"Okay, maybe next time we'll try with Porkpie," he shouted, making sure the horse heard him while giving his girlfriend's arm a pinch. "I suppose he'll be more civilized than you two!”
“Shut up!”
“Shut up!”
hi hello hola buenos días! how are u all? WEEKEND IS HERE!!!!!!!!! this is very very random. me with who??
#percy jackson x reader#percy jackson#pjo x reader#percy jackson x you#percy jackon and the olympians#fanfic#percy jackson x y/n#my writing#percy jackson imagines
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you could wipe my mind, i'd still be stuck on you
tags: peter parker x fem!reader, tooth-rotting fluff, college/university au, lots of sarcasm, 1k words synopsis: while going out shopping to buy snacks for movie night, your bf, peter parker, tries to convince to you to let him get a new video game. chaos ensues. a/n: wow hey welcome to my first fic posted on here... sorry if this seems rushed haha. tysm @103rafes for helping me with the ending, ily man. reblogs, comments, and likes are appreciated!! title is from stuck on you by grentperez
"alright, i think we've got everything!" your eyes scanned through the various assortment of junk food in the grocery cart. "movie night is gonna be awe-" You turned to face your bf only to find no one standing near you. "ugh... where is that idiot?"
walking around the store, you find your boyfriend of 1 year, peter parker, in the electronics section. of course he was. you thought, he probably even forgot what they were at the store for.
he was staring intently at the newest spider-man video game. Spider-Man 2, it had came out just last month and everyone was going crazy over it. he had a scrunched up look on his face, studying the cover of the game in the clear display case.
as you walked up to him, his senses picked up on your location and he turned his head around, quickly glancing at you before turning his head back towards the display case. "i still can't believe they make video games of me. they really captured my likeness" he let out a laugh, shaking his head in disbelief. "i am so going to get this."
rolling your eyes, you sighed. "no we're not mister. c'mon its time to go home." you tugged on the sleeve of his sweatshirt, but Peter still didn't move an inch.
"please y/n... ned has the game! so does everyone we know!"
"why don't you just go over to ned's house and play it?" you suggested, rolling your eyes once again. "yeah, keep rolling your eyes. it'll be stuck like that soon enough." he huffed with a pout. "if you let me get it i'll let you pick the movie tonight. i know you love those cheesy hallmark movies..." peter said in a sing-songy voice. he leaned in to give you a small peck on the cheek and looked at you with his chocolate puppy-dog eyes.
"your silly antics don't work on me." you can't help but let out a giggle as buried his face into your neck and kissing every expanse of skin on it. peter wrapped his arms around your waist hugging you close. "but no. out of the both of us, you're the worst at managing your spendings and we need the money."
he hummed. "but mr. stark gave me my paycheck on monday, its more than enough to buy the game and put away some of it in our savings..."
"you mean your allowance?"
"hey! i may not be an avenger, but i still work for one of the richest people in america" he laughed, messing up your hair. "so... can i still get it?"
you hesitated for a moment, doing some calculations in your head. the two of you lived together in a dingy apartment and did extra jobs on the side to keep the both of them afloat. you knew peter worked hard a lot, trying to keep his grades up while maintaining his life as the city's spider-man so maybe he did deserve something nice for himself.
the corners of your mouth lifted in a small smile. "well..."
—
“did you see that! i beat his ass so hard.” your bf laughed. you watched intently at the screen trying to decipher what was going on but all you could see were bright flashes of colour.
“you already beat ass in real life. don’t understand why you need to buy this game just to play a virtual version of yourself.” you said jokingly while eating from the bowls of chips and candy you bought earlier that day. you grimaced as you peter took a large handful of m&ms and popcorn, shoving them into his mouth.
“true, but this is more fun.” he said between mouthfuls. “plus i don’t get hurt.” he gave you a dorky little grin.
well there was no denying that, you thought as you smiled back. as much as peter tried to argue, you insisted on paying for the game as a gift. just seeing peter smile over some silly game made you fall in love with him all over again. it was surreal, dating the spider-man. the same one that appeared on the news 24/7. the same one that made you worry for days wondering if he might come back from saving crime.
but he wasn’t just spider-man. he was just plain old peter parker. the boy from queens that you met all those years ago. the boy who was practically an academic genius and the best boyfriend you could ever ask for.
interrupting you from your thoughts, peter wrapped his arm around your shoulder and held you tightly. he had already finished playing the game but he still grasped the controller in his hand.
“what are you thinking about?” he asked quietly, playing with the strands of hair falling on your shoulders. he smelled like fresh laundry and a hint of butter from the popcorn.
“what?”
peter chuckled. “you were staring at me with that look you get when you’re thinking really hard. like your nose scrunches up a bit and you have this wide smile on your face”
“oh… i wasn’t really thinking about anything.” you locked eyes with him, staring into his big, doe brown eyes. you shimmied closer to him and rested your head on shoulder. “just thinking about how great you are.”
“thanks for feeding my ego— ow!” you punched him on the arm but there was no anger to it. “im joking, im joking. you’re great too.” the smile lines on his face deepened.
peter leaned his head against yours. “thank you for getting me that game by the way. i love you.” he pressed his lips against your temple, making a line down towards your cheeks, then ending at your lips. they were soft and warm, and he tasted like slightly like chocolate.
“mm, love you too spidey-boy. now play your game, i didn’t spend 90 dollars on that for nothing.” you giggled lightly.
unable to pull away from your face, he grumbled. “okay, okay! way to ruin a moment with my lovely girlfriend…”
“does this spider-man have a girlfriend too?” you nodded towards the screen.
“you’re better than any video game girlfriend i could have as spider-man”. you couldn’t help but let out a string of laughs as he pulled you in again, planting kisses all over your face.
fin.
#🗞️ ── my works ✶ .ᐟ#spider man fanfic#spider man#spiderman#peter parker spiderman#mcu imagine#mcu fanfiction#marvel mcu#marvel fanfiction#peter parker fanfiction#peter parker#peter parker x reader#peter parker x you#peter parker x fem!reader#peter parker x y/n#fluff#tooth rotting fluff#fanfiction#fanfic#marvel cinematic universe#video games#spider man 2 ps5
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Play It Again, Play It Again, Play It Again
A/N: Part two of the mini-series! As always I hope you enjoy it as much I did writing it! I love seeing feedback! And feel free to request something! Let me know any feedback that you have! If you feel up to it send me a request and I will do my best to give it justice!
Summary: You're invited to a party by one of your new friends. Let's see how the night ends.
Word Count: 1963
It had been a couple of months since you had broke things off with Billy. Since that you've kind of tried to keep to yourself but everyone needs someone to talk to, especially to make it around here.
What made it better was that you met a couple of mothers when you would pick up Rhiannon from daycare, and started your own friend group. All of them were around your age and their kids were already playing with Rhiannon during daycare anyway. Nancy had a brown-eyed shaggy-haired boy named Theodore. Piper had a little curly-head girl named Rosemary. And then there is Robin, she doesn't have any children but she comes and picks up Theo or Rosie every now and then, even both sometimes.
It was nice that you and Rhiannon had some friends in town finally. Especially Rhiannon, you didn't want her to be lonely.
But at this particular moment you weren't sure if you were happy that you had friends anymore.
"Come on (Y/N)! You never leave the house unless it's work or taking Rhiannon somewhere! You need to have fun sometimes!" Robin tried to convince you.
"Yeah, I'm sure I can tell you what you do everyday. Get up, get Rhi and you ready, take her to daycare, go to work, pick up Rhi, have dinner and then go to bed," Nancy said watching the kids play on the playground.
You sigh, because she was right. You don't do anything fun that doesn't surround Rhiannon.
"Who's gonna watch Rhi though? I can't really afford a babysitter right now. I can barely afford daycare as it is."
"Piper's mom is going to watch the kids, I'm sure she won't mind watching Rhiannon," Nancy suggested and Piper nodded.
"I don't know guys," you hesitated, parties have never been your thing. The last time you were at a party that's when Rhiannon was conceived and here you are.
"(Y/N), you are 24. We are never gonna be this young ever again. Just this once and if you don't like it, you can leave and we'll never ask again," Piper chimes in, sitting on the bench next to you with a book on her lap that she hasn't touch since she got here, "We all need to let loose every once and a while."
The girls nodded, you groaned, "Fine. I'll go but only for two hours. That's it."
"That'll work! You'll have fun, I promise!" Robin said excitedly.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
You were on your way to the party. Riding with a friend from work. Dressed in something more warm and comfortable than it was cute since #1 it was October and it was cold during the nights; #2 you weren't really looking for anything right now since your thing since Billy. You were just there to hang out with friends and maybe meet some new people.
As you approached you noticed that there were a lot of trucks and some haybales, and everyone else was parked on the other side of the road. You didn't even think about bringing your own chair. You figured that there was going to be enough going on that you might not need it. But past you was too ambitions compared to present you so was full of nervous at the moment.
How the hell did you do this when you were in college?
Jessica put the car into park and got out and you followed suit.
"Hey I'll see you around? Around 1?" Jessica said with a smile. You nodded and smiled back.
You stood outside of the car for a second to catch your breath.
"It's all good. Everything will be okay. Just three hours. Yeah, only three hours and then you can go home," you hyped yourself up. You brushed yourself off (like you had dirt on you) and headed toward the crowd of people gathering around the bonfire.
"There she is! I wasn't sure you were going to show!" Robin said as she walked up to you and hugged you, "Here's the rest of the gang for you to meet!"
"Everyone this is (Y/N)! Be on your best behavior!" she said, jokingly, you heard some laughing and a, 'Booooo'.
"This here is Vickie, she's my girl," Robin introduced you to a ginger with freckles. You shook her hand, "Nice to meet ya."
"You know Nancy," Robin said and you hugged her as she came up. There was a nervous looking man behind her with brown hair, Robin said, "This is her husband, Jonathan. Theo looks like him."
"I can see it," you smiled and shook his hand too. Piper came up next, "I'm so glad that you made it! We want you to have fun too."
"Thanks, it's good so far," you smiled.
"Oh yeah!" she said, she turned to look behind her, "This is my husband, Eddie. It's where Rosie gets the curly hair from."
"Hey there, I'm Eddie, like she said, nice to meet you," Eddie said, he had long wild curly hair with a denim vest over his leather jacket.
"I like your pins. Iron Maiden is the best," you said as you looked at his pins.
Eddie literally beamed, "Thank you! I collect them from music stores. These are my favorites."
"Really cool!"
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Dude, have you met (Y/N)? She's awesome!" Eddie said to Steve.
"Is this another fantasy person that I'm supposed to learn?" Steve asked. Eddie looked at him with a weird face, "No, she's real man. She's friends with Piper and the others. She over there."
Eddie pointed to where a girl was sitting by herself on the tailgate of Piper's truck. Her legs swinging as she watched the fire crackle.
"She's got to have a boyfriend here. No way that she doesn't," Steve said, looking around for someone that was looking for her, "Is she Joe's girlfriend?"
"No man, Piper said that she's single. Not really looking for anything at the moment, just new friends," Eddie explained, "Buuuuut...you should try and make more than friends."
"I can make friends with her," Steve nodded and walked toward you.
"Good job babe," Piper said as she came up next to Eddie and fist bumped him and watched what was about to happen.
Steve walked up, "Hey, this seat taken?"
You looked over to the new voice.
Not going to lie, he's pretty cute.
You smiled, "Not at all," you slid over to make sure that he has enough room to sit.
"My name's Steve," he said as he sat down, putting his hands in his pockets.
"Nice to meet you, I'm (Y/N)," you said smiling.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
God how am I already falling in love with this woman already?
"Honestly, I love new wave music! The Cure is probably my favorite from the bunch as of right now, but that changes from month to month," you said, talking to Steve.
You've been talking to Steve for what felt ten minutes but it's actually been hour. You could do this all night.
"You know, I think that-" Steve started but then a familiar song came on the speakers and you're eyes lit up, and you jumped off the tailgate, cutting him off.
"This is my song! I've been listenin' to the radio all night long, hopin' that it would come on and here it is!"
You hold out your hand, "C'mon, come dance with me."
Before Steve could say anything, you grabbed his hand and dragged him up. He tried keeping up with you but he was too distracted by you to keep up. You had a carefree smile on your face and your body was moving in ways that was very bad for his groin area in public.
As the song came to an end, you kissed him on the cheek, "Thank you for dancin' with me."
"Play it again!" Steve yelled to see if someone could rewind the tape and start it over again so he could gain the courage to ask you out.
You smiled and yelled, "Play it again! Play it again!"
You both laughed and then heard the next song play, looking at each other almost in a trance.
"I-" Steve started to say but you looked down at your watch, "I had a lot of fun tonight Steve but I'm afraid that I have to go."
"Are you sure?" Steve asked, not really wanting you to leave just yet but understanding.
"Yeah, I gotta check on my-" you hesitated, "my pet. She's not used to being alone this late."
"I understand. Let me walk you to your car?" Steve offered.
"I actually rode here with one of my coworkers. So I guess I need to find her."
"I'll help you, who is it?"
"Jessica Cooley," you answered starting to look around for her.
"Jessica? She left already. Left with Matt Hargrave about an hour ago."
"What? You're kiddin'. I guess I'll ask someone else for a ride," you said a little upset.
"I can take you home," Steve offered, really hoping that you would take him up on the offer.
"Are you sure? I don't want to burden you. I can just have Piper or someone take me home," you said hesitant because you didn't know him, but you had a feeling that you could trust him.
"I'm sure. Come on, let's get you home."
You smiled, "Okay thank you."
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
You were looking out the window, thinking about something to start a conversation but you couldn't think of anything that wouldn't be considered small talk or just bad in general.
That was when Steve turned on the radio and you started singing along to (I've Had) The Time Of My Life.
It didn't take too long to get to your house, maybe three songs if you remember correctly, but for some reason it felt like it was taking a little longer than usual. And you weren't upset by it at all. It had been five songs already and you sang along to every song that had came on the radio.
But it was only when you getting ready to pull on your street was when Steve started to scan the radio, almost frantically.
"This is me," you said and Steve pulled into the driveway and put the car in park.
"Thank you for the ride home, I really appreciate it. I don't have cash on me right now, but I can run in and get some for gas?"
"It's no trouble at all. I don't want money. But if you really want to pay me back, let me take you out on a date?" Steve asked wearing a charming but hopeful smile on his face.
You smiled, "I would like that."
He smiled, "Sounds great, how Friday? Dinner and a movie?"
You nodded your head, "I would love that."
"Cool, let me walk you to the do-," Steve said and just as he said that, your song came on the radio.
"No way! There is no way that this song would play twice in one night!" you exclaimed excitedly.
"Come dance with," you said as you got out of the car. He followed you and started dancing in the headlights.
It was like straight out of a movie. Everything was perfect, the lights, the song, the weather, and you.
As the song started to fade out, you got caught up in the passion of dancing and the feeling of it, you kissed Steve.
It was just like everything else, the kiss was perfect.
When you broke the kiss he looked at you and said, "I'm gonna call the DJ right now and get that song played again right now."
You threw your head back laughing, "Goodnight Steve, thank you for the perfect night."
He smiled, "You took the words right out of my mouth."
#Spotify#steve harrington x reader#stranger things x reader#steve harrington fanfic#stranger things#luke bryan#steve harrington#steve harrington x you#steve harrington fanfiction
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# SOUL REAPER ICHIGO PT . |||
sexual content , both 18, virgin ichigo x reader , unprotected sex , cowgirl , pet names, praise kink , size kink , cum eating , oral (m, receiving) , dom (fem,reader) , sub (ichigo).
NOT PROOFREAD. sorry for any errors
part | here ! <
—————————————————————————
soul reaper ichigo - who was actually listing to the whole conversation and he was leaning against a wall in the hallway, his mind still thinking about you. the sight of you always made his stomach flutter, and his heart beat faster, but it was all overridden by the sadness and heartbreak he felt. he looked miserable.. his eyes spotted you walk out of the classroom, making his heart skip a beat. he began to panic.. unsure if he should come over and make an attempt to talk to you. he wanted to.. he really did.. but he felt so defeated and miserable, he didn’t want to get hurt any more.
“ hey.. can i talk to you for a minute..?” he finally took a breath and gathered the courage to walk up to you. just being this close to you made him feel.. so many things, but he tried to hide them.
you stood there awkwardly for a couple seconds before nodding slowly. he let out a small breath, silently thanking god that you actually answered him. he glanced around for a minute, noticing a couple of people passing by, before grabbing your wrist and gently guiding you into a nearby empty classroom. once in the empty classroom, he let your wrist go, shutting the door behind him before he turned to look at you. he took a breath, trying to find the right words to say.*
“i.. uh.. i need to ask you something.. if that’s alright..?”
“ what is it ichigo…” you let out a sigh after all these days we were finally speaking to each other. he took a small breath, noticing the tone of annoyance in your voice, but he ignored it for now. He leaned his back against the wall, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he looked at you
“ how.. how have you been doing..? after.. y’know- we broke up..”
“ really….? that’s what you wanted to know.. you know what we can have a conversation when you’re actually ready and are not beating around the bush…” you scoffed about to walk away from since you thought we’re gonna have a real discussion.
soul reaper ichigo - who he quickly grabbed your wrist and pulled you back before you could walk away. he wasn’t done yet.. he didn’t want you to leave yet. not again..
“ alright, alright.. fine..” he mumbled, before looking at you, his heart pounding in his chest.
“ fine.! we can please talk about you keeping secrets ichigo..! like you’re always with chad , uryu , ruika and orihime.! did you even ever like me..?!” you said confused trying your best to control your emotions.
he frowned, the sudden realization that you felt left out and like he didn’t like to hit him.. his heart hurt knowing you felt that way.. “ of course i like, love you! y-you’re my girlfriend..”
he stopped, thinking for a moment on whether or not to tell you about him being a soul reaper.. but him and his other friends already knew.
“ we’re not even dating … anymore ichigo..” you mumbled
soul reaper ichigo - who felt a pang in his chest when you mentioned you weren’t even dating anymore.. it was a reality he didn’t like to accept.
“ you’re right… we’re not..” he mumbled in response, his heart feeling heavy as he looked at you.
“ right… so what’s the point of even talking about it if you’re just keeping your secrets from me..”
he let out a small hiss of frustration, his hands clenched into fists, before he closed his eyes for a minute. he couldn’t keep it a secret for longer..
“ alright.. alright fine.. i have a secret.. and you need to promise you won’t freak out when i tell you..” your eyes lit up as he promised to finally tell you the truth.
he took a breath, his heart pounding in his chest. this.. was big. *like my dick-pause*. it could change everything, but he needed you to know..*
“ promise me you can’t freak out when i tell you.. please..” *he repeated, looking at you with a serious yet slightly nervous look in his eyes.*
“ okay.. i-i promise ichigo…”
soul reaper ichigo - who’s nodded slowly, silently praying to the god you’d actually keep your word. he knew how it’d go.. you’d either call him a liar or freak out and leave.. he knew better than to think you’d believe him right off the bat.
“ alright.. just.. trust me on this.. and don’t.. freak out..” he repeated one final time, before taking another deep breath.
“ i’m a soul reaper..”
“ … “
he looked at you for a moment, silently looking for any indication as to how you’d react.. but since you said nothing, he took it as a chance to continue.
” y-you’re not.. saying anything.. which, i’ll admit, is a little scary..” he mumbled, slightly nervous and scared of your possible reaction.
“ a s-soul reaper…?”
he nodded slowly, before taking a breath once more, preparing himself for any questions or any possible outburst.
“ yeah .. a soul reaper. one of the soul society.. y’know- the afterlife?”
soul reaper ichigo - who before he could finish his sentence you immediately pushed your lips against his. all thoughts in his head came to a sudden stop, every bit of worry or anxiety he felt about your reaction gone in the blink of an eye. all he felt was your lips against his and the shock of the sudden kiss, but he slowly but surely began to melt into it, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you closer.
your hands on his face you cupped his jaw as you pushed him down to your height making the kiss even more deeper.
a small, quiet moan escaped his lips as he gave into the heat of the kiss, pulling you even closer so your body was pressed against his own. He could feel his chest fill with a burning heat that he felt only around you, pushing his hands under your shirt and trailing them up your bare back. he’d missed this.. he’d missed you so much..
you also moaned into the kiss your tongue exploding his mouth basically sticking your tongue down his throat.
he couldn’t get enough of you. holding you like this, your tongue against his.. it was absolutely euphoric for him. as his thoughts became more hazy with need and want for you, he pushed you against a wall, his hands running all over your body as he deepened the kiss even more, practically wanting to devour you completely.
your hands let go of jaw and slowly moved down to the hem of his pants.
he froze for a moment as he felt your hand trail down his body, his mind immediately going into a panic on what exactly you were trying to do. He tried his best to keep focused on the kiss, not wanting to lose that feeling, but he could feel his body heating up and could feel himself already getting excited.
you finally pulled away after the hot long steamy kiss but your lips still touching as your hands slid into his pants not knowing he was a virgin.
soul reaper ichigo - who let out a small moan the moment your hand slid into his pants, and his eyes widened slowly as he realized what you were trying to do. he was absolutely embarrassed and extremely flustered, having never done anything like this before.
“w-wait- “
he started to say in protest, the words coming out in a small stutter as he tried to control his own excitement and desire for you.
“ then be quiet for me okay..?” you said quietly as your hands slowly moved into his boxers.
his face was completely red now, and his breathing was erratic and heavy as he nodded slowly, completely at your mercy as he desperately tried to keep any sounds in.
“ y-yeah.. i’ll be.. quiet..” he responded back in a small, embarrassed and slightly shaky voice.
“ s-but be quick about it..”
“ you rushing me…?” you smiled a bit as your warm hands finally touched his dick.
he inhaled sharply and let out a small gasp, his body shuddering slightly from the feeling. he was already at full attention, needy and desperate for you.. but he didn’t care. In that moment, he just wanted you, his heart rate going faster.
“ of course I’m rushing you.. we’ll get found out if you’re too slow..” he mumbled, unable to keep the needy tone out of his voice.
“ mm… i’ll go faster if you beg for it…” you said your lips grazing his ear.
soul reaper ichigo - who was a complete mess now, and that small gesture to his ear had him shivering more, a small gasp leaving his lips as he felt your breath against his ear. he bit his lip as he desperately tried to keep any sounds in, knowing he’d have to beg if he wanted more..
“ please.. please just.. do it faster.. i.. i need you..” he whispered.
your smile grew as you actually heard him begged as you got down your knees in front of him. he could see you get on your knees in front of him, and it was almost too much for him to process. his heart was racing, and he was sure it was hard to keep any sounds in at this point. but he tried his best, trying desperately to keep a small amount of control. he looked down at you, his eyes filled with need and want for you.
“please..”
your hands pulled out of his boxers and to the hem of his pants pulling them down slowly. as they fell to his ankles he felt his face get more red as he felt his pants being pulled down, his heart racing faster as he felt himself getting more excited. he suddenly remembered that he hadn’t told you.. he was still a virgin..
“ w-wait-“ he tried to say, only managing to stutter the one word, his breathing fast and shaky as he looked down at you, trying to figure out how to tell you.
“ what..?” you looked up at him, your fingers about to pull his boxers down as they traced the rim of his boxers. he bit his lip as he felt your fingers tracing the rim of his boxers, struggling to keep any more pleas and moans in, but he needed to tell you..
“ i.. i need to tell you something.. please..” he managed to say, still keeping his voice quiet so no one outside the classroom would overhear you and him.
soul reaper ichigo - who inhaled sharply as he felt his boxers start to be pulled down.. he knew if he waited any longer to say something he’d be too late.
“ i’m.. i’m a..” he started, trailing off as he tried to find the right words to say.
“.. i’m still a.. virgin..” he mumbled, his face practically burning and he looked down at you, hoping you wouldn’t judge him or say anything bad..
“ o-oh..” you froze as you removed your hands from his boxers stopping yourself before this could go any further but you couldn’t lie you felt a rush of excitement when he said that you were gonna be his first.. he froze and held his breath as he watched you remove your hands from his boxers.. he was embarrassed and a little ashamed for not telling you before..
“ is.. is that.. bad?” he asked quietly, the embarrassment clear in his voice as he looked down at you, still feeling the need and desire from a moment ago, but he figured you didn’t want to continue anymore..
“ n-no.! um no it’s not… j-just a surprise..” you said as you cleared your throat from the awkwardness that wasn’t there like a second ago.
he hesitantly nodded in response, still embarrassed but glad to know you didn’t think it was bad. his breathing had started to slow, but he could still feel his excitement and the need for you. he still wanted you, and he didn’t want to stop now..
“can.. can we still continue..?” he asked in a quiet voice, almost sounding like a plea again.
“ a-are you sure you don't want your first time to be special… and um not in a classroom..?” you asked quietly, looking up at him.
he nodded slowly, blushing at the thought of it being special, but he didn’t want to wait anymore.. he wanted you now. he reached down, grabbing your wrist and pulling you up so you were standing in front of him again.
“ i don’t care.. i just need you..” be muttered, his heart still beating fast as he looked down at you, bringing his hands up to your waist to hold you close to him. he was a mess for you, desperate for your touch..
soul reaper ichigo - who let out a small moan against your lips, his hands pulling you in closer and his arms wrapping around your waist as he desperately kissed you back. he was completely lost in you, wanting more and more. he couldn’t get enough of this.. the feeling of your lips against his, your hands on him. he needed you, all of you.
your hands went to the bottom of your shirt pulling it off after your head over shirt landed on the floor just leaving you in your bra.
his eyes widened and he froze for a moment at the sight of you in only your bra, his breath catching in his throat as he looked at you. a small blush crept across his face and his eyes roamed over your body, taking in every last inch of you. his hands went back to gripping your waist, holding you firmly against him as he tried to regain his bearings.
“ you’re.. beautiful..” he finally managed to say, his voice sounding slightly strangled.
your smile grew as your hands went behind your back unclipping your bra as that also fell on the ground showing him your boobs in which you have your nipple pierced
*if you don’t like just ignore just thought it would be cool to add that.*
his eyes grew impossibly wide at the sight of you completely topless, his breath getting caught in his throat again as he looked at you. “ holy sh-“ he immediately cut himself off, unable at that moment to even form a coherent sentence. he could feel himself getting more excited than ever, his mind completely fuzzy and filled with thoughts of you.
“ i.. i didn’t think you’d..” he muttered, his hands still on your waist, gripping a bit tighter.
“ shhh..” you mumbled, pushing him down on one of the chairs in the classroom, reminding him to be quiet since you’re both still in the school.
soul reaper ichigo - who he gasped as he suddenly felt himself get pushed down onto a chair, his head hitting the top part before he sat up more so he could actually look at you. he swallowed, reminding himself that he had to keep quiet as he looked at you, completely at your mercy as he sat in the chair.
“ o-okay.. i’ll be quiet..” he mumbled as he bit his lip, looking up at you.
“ good boy…” you replied back as my fingers pulled down his boxers slowly as they slid down to his ankles along with his pants, feeling yourself get more soaked in your panties as your skirt lifted up as you got down on your knees once again.
he shuddered as he felt his boxers slowly get taken off, his breathing getting heavier and his heart rate increased. he could feel your words go through him again, making him feel even needier and more desperate for more. he looked at you, his mouth slightly open as he struggled to keep any sounds in, almost completely at your mercy.
“ y-yeah.. i’m a good boy..” he managed to stutter out in a low, slightly strained voice. he reached out for you, trying to hold back a small whine, wanting to keep his hands on you his eyes roamed over your body, and he couldn’t look away once he noticed your piercings.
your hands went to his dick as you grip him with your small warm hands he was so much larger than you expected and so so pretty. slender, with a pale shaft that leads into a rosy pink at the tip leaking precum. it curves up and to the right. you brush your thumb over his tip smearing his precum over his tip making his body twitch and his hips thrust up to your touch.
soul reaper ichigo - he inhaled sharply when he felt you grip him, holding back a small moan at the feeling of your warm hands on him. his breathing was already uneven from the feeling, and the touch of your thumb over his tip had him shuddering, his hands subconsciously gripping the chair.
“ f-fuck..” he muttered under his breath, unable to stop the small words from escaping. he felt his entire body overheat at the feeling of your touch.
your hands started to trace the veins that were going up to his rosy pinkish tip as pre cum starts to leak from out of his tip you feel yourself getting even wetting your panties molded of your folds.
he tensed up, his breathing heavy and labored as you traced the veins, his tip leaking precum as you teased him. his head was spinning, and he was struggling to keep any sounds in, biting his lip to hold back moans of pleasure.
“ i-i can’t..” he quietly managed to say, his hands gripping even tighter on the arms of the chair he was sitting on.
you snuck your hand under your skirt as you began to take off your panties coming off your ankles while your head lowered towards his aching dick as you kitten licked his now reddish angry tip licking off the pre cum. “ mm… sweet..”
he gasped and shuddered at the feeling of your tongue, his hands gripping even tighter on the chair, the sound of the wood creaking slightly being heard. he bit down on his lip, trying to contain moans, and it took everything he had just to keep himself somewhat quiet.
“ nnngh.. that feels so.. good..” he managed to say in a quiet, strained voice. you stood up off your knees revealing your naked body. his heart was racing and his mind was completely fuzzy, and he was suddenly confronted with the sight of you being fully naked. he could feel himself getting more excited and desperate as he looked you over, his eyes roaming your body.
“ fuck.. you’re so perfect..” he mumbled quietly, his eyes lingering on your pierced nipples before looking back at your face.
“ are you sure you still want this..?” you asked in a hushed tone after he was still a virgin.. he nodded slowly, his brain already becoming completely muddled from desire and need, but he had to keep control for a moment.
“ i'm sure, i want this.. i want you..” he said, his voice quiet but firm, letting you know he truly wanted to do this.
“ okay…” you mumbled before sitting on his lap your hands grabbed him softly before slowly lining him up with my entrance… fuck you’re soaked. he felt his heart skip a beat as you sat on his lap, his eyes on you the entire time. he could hardly breath, excitement and a small hint of nervousness rushing through him as you lined him up with your entrance. he bit his lip, his hands going to your hips, holding onto you.
“ y-you can… keep going..” he said in a low, quiet voice, his eyes watching you closely, his breath hitching in anticipation as he spoke.*
soul reaper ichigo - who felt his tip go into your warm tight folds making you let out a quiet moan just from the tip stretching you out already you felt yourself getting more aroused damn near becoming dizzy as you slid down your wall clenching around him.
he let out a strangled gasp, biting his lip harshly to try and keep any louder sounds in as he felt himself slowly go into you. he was so sensitive, and the feeling of you around his tip had his head spinning, his body already wanting so much more. his breathing was quick and erratic, his hands grabbing your waist and holding you to him, his body shaking softly as he tried
you continue to slide down his girth making you let out a moan making me clench around him tighter as you sat all the way down his and yours thighs touching as he was so deep in you right now making you breathless you never felt so full.. you looked down noticing the huge bulge in your stomach.
ichigo was at his limit, his breathing and senses completely erratic and overwhelmed by the feeling of you around him. his body was on fire, and every sense was on overload. he looked down and saw the bulge in your stomach, and he thought he might lose his mind at the sight. He was completely in bliss.
you felt one of his hands go to your stomach and put pressure on his large bulge showing through your stomach making you clench harder and your hands went to squeeze his shoulders.
he gasped as he felt your clench around him, and he could barely handle it at that point. he was feeling so much pleasure and so many sensations at once, he was completely at your mercy. he could barely even think straight anymore, but he looked down and felt your hands on his shoulders, and he brought a hand up to the one you had on his shoulder, intertwining his fingers with yours, holding your hand as he pressed his hand against your stomach.
he gasped at the movement of your hips, a small moan escaping him before he could stop it. he held onto your hips and your hand, his head spinning as he felt your motions on him.
“ ah.. y-you feel so good.. mmngh..” he was struggling to keep his voice quiet, and he was sure anyone outside the classroom would’ve likely heard by now, but he didn’t even care at this point.
“ such a good boy…” you coo peppering a few kisses near the crook of his neck whilst your cunt glides on his dick stretching you out even more than you could imagine trying your best not to cum already.
soul reaper ichigo - who he trembled at the feeling of your kisses and your praise, a small moan escaping him once again. he was completely at your mercy, but he didn’t mind at all, in fact he loved it. his body was buzzing with pleasure and his mind was completely fuzzy from it all, he was overwhelmed.
“ f-fuck…” you mumbled you couldn’t even get the words out making you all warm your brain going dizzy as you went even faster you could tell he was close once you felt him twitch deep inside of you. he gasped at the feeling of you picking up the pace, his body getting closer and closer to the edge as he felt himself twitching inside you.
you were caught off guard when ichigo thrust his hips into your cunt making you let out a pornographic moan as it echoed in the classroom making an attempt to smack your ass but he quickly rubbed it softly afterwards. he was completely lost in the pleasure and feeling of you, no longer even trying to contain moans. when he heard your moan echo through the room, he was unable to hold back anymore, and he was already on the edge.
“ n-nngh.. i’m..i’m close..”
“ yeah hmm.. b-be ..fuck- a good boy for me..? and cum inside me..” you whispered as your lips hovered over his ear as you started to peck his neck slowly with kisses.
“ y-yeah.. i’ll be a good boy, i promise..” he nearly growled at your words, the feeling of your lips on his neck and whisper in his ear bringing him closer and closer to the edge. he was quickly losing his mind, and he was ready to give you exactly what you wanted, to be a good boy for you. he was a complete mess under you, and it was nearly sending him over the edge.
“ yes.. good boy..” you breathes out, hearing the brief sounds of squelching your own cunt made going inside of you and suddenly the entire room grows quiet from the sounds of just ichigo's and your soft breaths and your pussy making all kinds of noise because of ichigo's length.
soul reaper ichigo - who he was trembling in pleasure at the sounds coming from you, he was completely at your mercy, and he was nearing the end. it was all so much and he was completely overwhelmed by it, he was almost at his breaking point.
“ i’m.. i’m going to-” he managed to say, his voice strained and breathing heavy, he could barely speak through how.
“ shhh… it’s okay.. baby open your mouth for me…” you hushed him as you begin to suck on his neck. he gasped and shuddered, biting back a moan as he felt your lips on his neck, doing as you told him and opening his mouth, your nipple piercing pressed up against his chest.
he trembled at the feeling of your lips on his neck, the feeling of the nipple piercing against his bare chest as well as hearing you whisper to him. he looked at you and did exactly as you said, he opened his mouth.
you bit your lip before pressing your whole body against his still riding him. you licked your lips before cupping his jaw softly collecting saliva in mouth before spitting into his mouth.
soul reaper ichigo - who he gasped as he felt your body pressed against his, and when you licked your lips he had a flash of a feeling of anticipation, not knowing what you were going to do. when you cupped his jaw and he saw you gathered your saliva in your mouth, he couldn’t look away from you, watching you intently as he waited. when he felt your spit on his tongue, his eyes widened slightly in surprise, but he didn’t complain, and instead swallowed your spit.
you grip his jaw harder as you smashed your lips against his it was such a mess a sloppy kiss you started to grind down on him as he continued to thrust up into your g-spot making you moan into the kiss.
he gasped into the kiss as you kissed him deeper, it was all so messy, but that only added to how overwhelming all this was for him, the amount of pleasure he was feeling and the sensations of your mouth on his, it was all so much. he bucked his hips up into you, hitting your g-spot and continuing to thrust into you, his mind completely fuzzy and blank by this point, he couldn’t even think anymore. he held onto you with one hand on your hip and the other tangled up in your hair.
“ mm..!” you let out a loud moan in the classroom as you continued to suck his neck going down to his apple adam his dick was just driving in and out of you.
he was quickly losing himself to the pleasure, his mind and body completely overwhelmed by all the sensations as he thrusted into you, his breathing getting more heavy and erratic, the feeling of your lips on his neck and your moans and sounds only driving him more crazy. he gripped you tighter, his hands trembling, as if holding onto you was the only thing keeping
you gasp once he prods against your g-spot for probably the uncountable time now. ichigo breathing hitches, and once he cums it's so much as he's pouring such thick creamy ropes of cum into your womb. you slow down a bit, still riding him ichigo dick pulses inside of you.
soul reaper ichigo - who he was still trembling softly from his release, his body and mind completely over sensitized from everything that had happened. he held onto you, his hands still shaking from the overwhelming pleasure. he let out a deep breath, trying to steady his breathing, which was still irregular and erratic.
“ holy..fuck..” he managed to get out, still trying to find his bearings again, and he felt he was still a bit overwhelmed from everything that had just happened.
“ couldn’t wait for me.. huh baby so greedy….” you giggle quietly as you let out of his neck revealing the red sensitive hickeys going past his neck and down to his apple adam’s. he couldn’t help but huff at your words, the feeling of your giggles against his neck sending a shiver down his spine. he could faintly feel the sensitive hickeys and marks on his neck, and he knew that it’d be a while before he’d be able to hide them.
“ well whose fault do you suppose that is?” he teased, a small smirk on his face, his breathing still a bit labored.
“ oh..? is my good boy talking back to me..” you raised your brow as you clench down on him riding him as you unexpectedly came hard my legs shaking from the unexpected orgsam.
he hissed at the unexpected clench from you, gripping you a bit tighter in response. he was still a bit sensitive and the feeling made him shiver a bit, even though he wasn’t expecting you to come so suddenly.
“ i-” he started, but stopped, his head falling back a bit as he felt you clenching around him “ i ..” he tried to speak again but his mind was still fuzzy, and his ability to form words was a bit diminished at that moment.
“ that’s what i thought…” you mumbled tiredly but still having the energy to talk back as you stopped riding him your thighs became sore your legs still shaking.
soul reaper ichigo - who he couldn’t help but let out a small huff at your words again as you stopped and he felt your thighs trembling. he still held you in his lap, both his hands on your hips, and he was still trying to slow down his breathing, but it was taking a moment.
“ well you can’t blame me, you make it too damn hard not to talk back.” he huffed again as he spoke
“ oh yeah what happened to my good boy… hmm.?” you whispered against his ear. he shivered again at the feeling of your whisper against his ear, but he couldn't help but pout a bit at your words, knowing that you were teasing him.
“ well... i think you broke him.” he muttered, still holding onto you, his hands a little tight, as if he didn't want to let you go just yet
you giggle quietly at his words before gasping once he suddenly lifts you up softly, pulling out you and ichigos fluids mixing together leaking down your thighs. his mind and body still in a bit of a hazy state, but he was regaining himself again. he held you for a moment. he leaned against you a bit after he pulled out, still feeling a bit dazed and hazy, his mind still trying to clear and come back to reality, and the feeling of your fluids leaking down your thighs was a bit distracting to him. he was silent for a moment, just holding you and trying to gather his thoughts before he finally spoke up again.
“ mm… that was… that was a hell of a first time..” he breathed out softly, looking down and seeing your combined fluids mixing together on your thighs.
you slid off his lap, getting down on my knees in front of him as he sat in the chair still. his eyes widened a bit when you got off his lap and down onto your knees, he wasn’t sure what you were planning, but he couldn’t deny the slight jolt of excitement he felt as he watched you. he leaned back a bit in the chair, his eyes locked on you.
soul reaper ichigo - who he gasped suddenly as he felt your hand on him, and it quickly turned into a low moan as he felt your tongue on him. the feeling was so intense after everything that had already happened, he couldn’t help it. he placed a hand on your head, gently gripping your hair in one hand.
he let out another moan as you started sucking on the tip, and he could barely hold back a gasp when he felt your tongue swirling around it. he felt you deepthroating him, and he couldn’t hold back suddenly. you felt him let out a hot steamy cum spurt of his making you gag since he didn’t warn me which caught you off guard but you swallowed it anyways. he quickly tried to take his hand off your head, feeling bad that he hadn’t thought to warn you.
“ s-sorry, i-” he began to speak, but he was still a bit overwhelmed and his words came out kind of strangled. he took a moment to steady himself, his breathing still a bit quick, his head spinning a bit as he looked down at you feeling a bit bad for not warning you, his mind all warm and fuzzy, but he couldn’t help but feel a bit entranced by the sight in front of him. he slowly removed his hand from your hair, letting out a soft shuddering breath as he looked at you “ sorry.. i just.. didn’t think to warn you i was gonna…”
you lifted your head up quickly as you gasp for air, licking your lips, tasting his leftover fluids on your lips. you opened your mouth to talk but ended up with a lost voice… just from how big he was fuck you’re gonna need to gargled some salt water..
he watched you nod, noticing your slower movements and the shift in the mood, and he was suddenly all too aware that you weren’t together anymore. the whole situation had him feeling a little guilty, in a way, as a part of him felt as though he was using you, and he didn’t like that feeling. he took a breath, trying to sort through his thoughts and his emotions, but he honestly had no idea what to say
“ ichigo…” you mumbled as your voice cracked of course still sore from deep throating him.
soul reaper ichigo - who he looked down at you again, and when he heard the tone of your voice his breath caught a bit, and he didn’t know if it was because of how rough your voice sounded, or something else. either way he felt bad, knowing exactly what the reason was for it being so rough
“ y-yeah..?” he questioned quietly, almost hesitating to speak, feeling an odd mix of guilt and other, more complex emotions
“ get back together with me..” you said quietly but it didn’t sound like a question, more like a demand.
“ please…” you mumbled, covering your chest that had your nipple pierced since it suddenly got cold as a gust of wind flew over the classroom.
he noticed the sudden chill, and when he saw you try to cover yourself he moved on instinct to reach out and grasp your hands, taking them in his own and gently pulling them away from your chest, holding them up between you.
“ you’re gonna get cold if you do that.” he murmured quietly, not knowing what else to say yet. he couldn’t look away from you, his mind still a tangled mess.
soul reaper ichigo - who he instinctively wrapped his other arm around you as he pulled you onto his lap, his hand cupping your breast keeping you a bit warmer and the feeling of the piercing against his palm sent a shiver down his spine. his mind was still caught between what you had just asked, and everything that’s been happening.
" okay... yeah. yeah, we can... get back together." he mumbles, he sighed when he looked down, his hand was just big enough to cover your entire chest. he couldn’t resist tracing his thumb over your nipple piercing, as he held you close to him, resting his chin on your shoulder
your eyes lit up at his words as you smile slightly. another gust of wind came from the door and it caught both of yours and ichigo's attention when we realized the classroom door was open….
he’d been entirely focused on you, so he hadn’t noticed the door being open until you both turned to look at it. his eyes widened a bit when he saw it, realizing that someone could’ve walked by at any time and seen them… he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, the feeling of worry and guilt flooding through him again, now remembering where they were, and the possibility of someone walking in on them..
he felt the color drain from his face when he saw chad standing there, stunned and obviously shocked by the scene. you felt embarrassed after all this time how long was he standing there…? ichigo couldn’t think of a single word to say at that moment, he just stared, feeling frozen in place as chad stood in the doorway.
soul reaper ichigo - who actually thanks chad for getting you and him back together even after chad walked into the awkward situation.
soul reaper ichigo - who secretly kept you panties that were on the classroom floor and stuffed them into his pockets while you didn’t even notice.
soul reaper ichigo - who’s finally happy that he got his girlfriend back and doesn’t even have to keep secrets anymore…
𖣂 KANYEREALDAUGHTER SPEAKS - i’m so happy to be done with this i’ve been working on this for two days.. almost fell asleep writing this.
like more ..? here’s my masterlist
words - 6.2k
» , ᴀ ᴋᴀɴʏᴇʀᴇᴀʟᴅᴀᴜɢʜᴛᴇʀ
copyright ©️. ᴘʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ . «
#bleach tybw#bleach thousand year blood war#bleach#ichigo kurosaki x reader#ichigo kurosaki#ichigo x reader#bleach ichigo#ichigo smut#ichigo kurosaki smut#kanyerealdaughter#kanyerealdaughterwrotethis
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Project: Killcode
batfamily + oc insert
tw: none
wanna read more? here’s the table of contents!
want to read the first fic in the hundred days series so you understand what’s going on here? here it is!
aha…. ha… ha… they’re not okay
part thirty
❝ HYPOCRISY ❞
SUNDAY — JULY 29 — 5:11AM
WHEN BENTLEY OPENED HIS EYES ON SUNDAY MORNING, IT WAS REALLY BRIGHT IN HIS BEDROOM. And warm. And the ceiling was really… orange? And weeping willow-y? And his bed didn’t feel like a bed at all?
With a sudden gasp, he sat bolt upright, panic and adrenaline flooding his veins like gasoline and sending a wave of volatile dread seeping through his entire body. His eyes flicked to the golden sunrise, to the fountain, to the grass he was sitting on, to the trees above him, to the building he was supposed to be in, to the Chloe that was laying on the ground next to him.
There was no way he had…
Chloe startled awake at his outburst, her face twisting up in confusion, eyes flicking around just like his had before she shot directly onto her feet. “Oh shit!”
Bentley pushed himself off of the grass, his heartbeat pounding in his ears. “Oh my God.”
It wasn’t super late in the morning, at least, judging by the dim sunrise. He dug his phone out of his pocket in a panic and, squinting into it, he was extremely relieved to see that he had no texts. It was 5:13am.
Asten was so back at the dorm already.
How had they managed to fall asleep out there? He couldn’t even seem to fathom deciding to sleep on the ground when he wasn’t even supposed to be outside in the first place. All he’d been thinking about the previous night was Chloe and how stressed out her breakdown was making him. He never once thought about going to sleep. And yeah, he’d been pretty tired, but… sleeping there hadn’t even been an option in his mind, yet somehow, he… they…
“How the hell did we fall asleep?!” She half-shouted, whipping her phone out of her pocket and cringing at the screen. “My roommates all knew I was coming out here to meet you! They’re gonna think we slept together!”
Bentley ran an anxious hand through his hair, glancing at her in confusion. “…Didn’t we?”
Chloe looked at him with this absolutely gobsmacked, absolutely appalled look on her face, before she seemed to realize… something. “I’m not even going to begin to explain that to you.”
Bentley had no idea what she was talking about.
“God, I… I’m so sorry, Bentley, I didn’t mean…” Chloe scrolled through something on her phone, her cheeks flushing red, cringe deepening. “I’m so sorry!”
“It’s… okay,” He replied, though the fact that he was practically already vibrating from anxiety proved otherwise. He was so dead. Asten was literally going to murder him.
“It’s so not okay! Can you even imagine the rumors that’re going to spread if I don’t shut them up fast enough?!” She basically yelled, tugging at her sort of messed up ponytail. “No, no, no. This is so not how this was supposed to go.”
Did she mean that everyone would think they, like, kissed? Or something? What did that have to do with sleeping next to each other?
When Bentley said nothing, but looked back down at his shoes, she continued: “Your roommates went to that party, right? There’s still a chance they’re not back yet — you should go, now. This is such a disaster…”
“Last time they came back before sunrise…” He trailed off.
“Shit. I’m so sorry, Bentley, I didn’t… and… God,” She ran a hand over her face. “Okay. It’s fine. It’s fine. It’s all going to be fine.”
Bentley didn’t say anything just kinda… stood, thinking about how much Asten was going to kill him.
“Hey,” Chloe’s hands were suddenly on his shoulders, and he locked eyes with her, brown on brown. “It’s gonna be fine, just go now before anyone sees. And… and don’t sleep with anyone till you’re married!”
Bentley didn’t say anything to that (because didn't they just sleep together?!), but he did get out of his own head enough to comprehend that he needed to go back to his dorm. Like, yesterday.
So, without a word, he turned, and he went.
He was about halfway there when he realized he didn’t have his keycard.
Which meant someone would have to let him in.
“Shit,” He groaned as he came out of the stairwell on their floor, the sixth floor. He took a quick glance both directions down the long, wainscoted hallway, and when it came back empty, he quietly moved toward their door and whipped his phone out of his pocket.
He tapped on one of his very first contacts. It rang… and it rang…
“Bentley?”
Bentley sighed heavily, running a hand over his face. “Hey, Bell… I need you to let me into the dorm without waking anybody up.”
He heard Bellamy exhale. “That won’t be hard. I’m the only one here.”
Bentley creased his brow as he walked up to their room. “What? I’m at the door.”
Hardly a half-second after he spoke, the call ended, the lock clicked, and the door opened. Bellamy was standing on the other side — his hair was sort of messed up, and his big brown eyes were dull and sleepy. He was wearing some blue pajamas that reminded Bentley of the sailboat ones he used to wear.
“Sorry, Bell, I didn’t mean to wake you up,” He cringed as he stepped through the door, kicking it closed behind him.
“S’ okay. I don’t sleep much anyways,” Bellamy replied quietly, shoving his phone in the pocket of his pajama pants. Bentley glanced around the dorm, his gaze landing on all four of the bedroom doors that were just… sitting wide open.
“Where’s Varian? I thought he didn’t go to the party,”
Bellamy shrugged, walking over to the living area and plopping down on one of the couches. “I don’t know. Did you go to the party with them? I thought you were here all night…”
“I’m sorry, I would’ve stayed if I’d have known you’d be by yourself,” Bentley cringed (He was really good at this stuff, wasn’t he?) “But no, I didn’t go to the party — I had to talk to someone.”
Bellamy creased his brow at him. “All night?”
“I fell asleep on accident,” He replied, making his way over to the couch and plopping down next to him. “After I saw what happened to everyone last time they partied, I decided it wasn’t for me.”
Bellamy didn’t say anything, but just kinda looked down at his hands and fiddled with his pajama sleeves. Bentley could hear the little machines whirring beneath them.
“What’s wrong?” He questioned. Bellamy glanced back up at him, looking sort of surprised, but quickly looked back down.
“Nothing,” He muttered.
“Bell…”
“It’s okay, really. I don’t want you to feel bad…” He trailed off, and Bentley sat up a little straighter, turning toward him slightly.
“Feel bad for what?”
“I…” Bellamy started quietly, glancing at Bentley then down at his hands again, tugging at his own sleeves. “I… I had a nightmare and… when I woke up, nobody was here…”
Bentley internally threw himself off a cliff.
Of course Bellamy would. Why wouldn’t he? With Bentley’s relationship with luck, he was surprised his roommates didn’t just straight up die in the middle of the night.
Bentley exhaled heavily, watching as Bellamy continued to pick at his sleeves. “I’m really sorry, Bell. Was it bad?”
Bellamy just kinda looked down at his lap. “The dream wasn’t so bad, but then I got up and no one was here, and…”
There was a familiar little quiver to his voice that made Bentley feel even worse about leaving than he had about Chloe.
Bellamy sniffed lightly, turning away. “It was really scary…”
Bentley sighed lightly, lifting his right arm and draping it loosely round Bellamy’s shoulders. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left.”
“It wasn’t your fault I had a bad dream,” He shrugged, wiping at his eyes without turning back around. “It just freaked me out, is all. I thought you were at the party and I didn’t want to bother you…”
“You can call me for anything, no matter what I’m doing. I’ll answer — I promise,” Bentley replied, squeezing his shoulder lightly. “I hate that you were by yourself.”
“It’s okay… it really wasn’t a big deal, just… sometimes I can’t tell if I’m awake or asleep, and it made me really scared…” Bellamy continued, and Bentley frowned.
“That’s how a lot of my nightmares are, too,” He replied quietly, with a soft sigh.
Bellamy looked over at him. “I heard that you had one the other night. Was it bad?”
Images flashed through Bentley’s mind in quick succession — Varian bleeding out in Dick’s arms, Rockie getting shot right in front of him, Asten falling off the roof, Nico getting his head beaten in... “Yeah. It was bad.”
“I thought so. I heard you… screaming. But I didn’t know if I was actually awake so I… didn’t come out. I’m sorry…” Bellamy trailed off.
Bentley patted his shoulder. “It’s okay, Bell. I wouldn’t have, either.”
Bellamy sniffed again, glancing forward at the floor ahead of them with a few quick blinks, bringing a hand up to rub at his eyes.
“Do you want me to do the frogs again? You seem tired,”
“No, that’s okay,” He replied with a small shrug. “I’m not that tired.”
Bentley watched him, observing quietly for a few minutes as his blinks got progressively longer.
“Are you sure about that?” He asked with a soft smile, squeezing his shoulder lightly. “It’s okay to be tired. I’m tired and I just woke up.”
Bellamy smiled faintly in amusement, glancing over at him for just a split second.
Bentley sighed lightly. “It’s okay, you can go to sleep. I won’t go anywhere — I promise.”
"...are you sure?" Bellamy muttered.
"I'm sure. Unless you'd rather be alone,"
"No. No, being alone is..." Bellamy trailed off, picking at his sleeves. "Scary..."
A beat passed.
"My head hurts,"
Bentley rubbed his shoulder lightly. "Do you want some medicine?"
"No..." He muttered, fiddling with his fingers some more, like he was nervous about something. "Can I just..."
Bentley watched him carefully, but he never spoke again. He just sort of looked down at his lap. "Can you just what?"
Bellamy shrugged and looked away, abandoning his question entirely.
"You can ask. I can already tell you the answer is most likely yes," Bentley replied, earning a faint smile in response.
"I... was going to ask if I could..." Bellamy trailed off, continuing to pick at his sleeves. "If I could maybe..." His eyes flicked down to Bentley's shoulder, and suddenly, he seemed to understand.
"Oh, yeah," He replied immediately. "I'm not gonna say no to that."
“Are you sure?”
Bentley hummed. “Super sure.”
With that, Bellamy settled himself down on the couch and grabbed one of the blankets from the back of it, draping it over himself. Then, with an attentive glance to Bentley, subtly and tentatively moved until the side of his head came to rest on Bentley’s shoulder.
"Sorry if that’s… weird, I just…”
"It’s not weird," Bentley replied, smiling faintly as he adjusted his arm so it was comfortable for both of them. "I've probably spent more time in the last three years sleeping with someone else next to me than alone -- so I don't mind. It's actually nice."
“Oh… okay,”
A few moments of silence passed, and Bellamy settled in farther, adjusting his head against Bentleys shoulder with a quiet sigh. “Y’know, I… think you’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”
Bentley said nothing, only glanced at him. By the time he’d managed to work up a response, Bellamy’s eyes were comfortably closed, his breathing had evened out, and the machines on his arms slowed until he could barely hear them anymore.
If Bellamy kept talking like that, Bentley was gonna have to ask Bruce if they could take him home.
—
“-must’ve woken up and came in here,” Was the first thing Bentley’s ears registered when his senses started coming back to him. He was laying somewhere, but it wasn’t his bed. It was…
Oh yeah — the couch, in the living area. He wasn’t sitting up anymore; He seemed to be laying across it, and there was a blanket thrown over him that hadn’t been there before. Bellamy’s presence had all but vanished from his right.
“You think he noticed you were gone?”
“I hope not. He was dead asleep when I left,”
It was Asten and Valor whispering — though Bentley probably wouldn’t have been able to tell in his half-awake state if it weren’t for their opposing accents.
“Are you gonna tell him?” Valor questioned.
“Unless he noticed I was gone, no. I’m not hungover anymore, so it shouldn’t matter,”
He wasn’t hungover, so it shouldn’t matter. It shouldn’t matter that literally yesterday Asten had given Bentley a speech about not keeping secrets, and then did something the same night that he planned on keeping secret. (What kind of world was Asten living in where he could just… be all hypocritical like that? Bentley wasn’t allowed but he was?)
Bentley fought the urge to huff dramatically and, instead, stayed eerily still on the couch, pretending to sleep. (He was pretty good at that.)
“You’re welcome, by the way, for being the puke dad again,” Came a third voice, with a distinct Russian lilt.
“Yeah, yeah, thanks for waking up and coming to the hangover rescue. Where’s Koa and Rockie?” Valor questioned.
“Koa’s throwing up outside. I think Rockie’s out there with him,”
“Jesus, that kid gets sicker than anyone I’ve ever met in my entire life,” Valor sighed.
“He also gets drunker than anyone else,”
“Because he's obsessed with beer pong. He played it at least thirty times last night,”
Bentley just listened as the voices moved about the dorm, a few doors opening and closing and sounds bouncing around. An unidentifiable amount of time later, the distinct sound of the dorm door opening and closing pierced the air — it must’ve been Koa and Rockie.
A few more voices came and went — small talk, mostly. Bentley didn’t listen because he was too busy being absolutely pissed that Asten had the audacity to be such an arrogant hypocrite after he made Bentley cry about it the day before.
Eventually, the voices faded into the other rooms, and the dorm went quiet again.
Bentley, extraordinarily angry but not mean enough to disturb everyone’s sleep, forced himself back to bed on the couch.
He’d talk to Asten later.
Later came sooner than he wanted it to… but at the same time, took all too long to come around.
He shuffled back into his and Asten’s bedroom at nearly eleven in the morning. The dorm was practically dead — not a soul had come out into the living area since they’d all returned earlier. Part of him kind of wanted to cry (because he couldn’t be mad like a normal person.) and the other part of him wanted to, like, burn something down.
For now, he decided to find somewhere in the middle to float.
He went into his and Asten’s room, kicking the door closed behind him and glancing at the top bunk. Asten was laying up there under his blankets, but his arms and phone were sticking out, and his screen was on, signaling that he was awake.
“Hey, B,” He greeted casually. “Why were you in the living room?”
Bentley breathed in and out, staving down some of the anger that threatened to make him, like, yell. “Bellamy had a nightmare. We were both in there, but he left,” He replied curtly.
He pulled his desk chair out and sat on it, then heard Asten shift, as though he were trying to look at him from his bed. He must’ve given up because his head never appeared from under the covers.
“I didn’t hear you leave,”
Was he seriously trying to make Bentley think he was home all night?
Bentley shrugged with a short huff. “Not sure you could hear the door from Mason’s house, anyway.”
Asten’s head did pop out, then, and he sat up on the bed. “Did-“
“I’m not stupid, Asten. I was awake when you left, and I was awake when you were telling Valor you weren’t gonna tell me,” He huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “What the hell?”
Asten didn’t say anything, but worked his way off the top bunk and sat on Bentley’s instead, crossing his arms. He looked tired, like he’d just woken up, but sort of offended at the same time. “Not everything I do is your business, B.”
Bentley narrowed his eyes at him, wanting nothing more than to set his hair on fire. “You lied to me.”
“I didn’t lie,” Asten scoffed.
“Well, you didn’t tell me the truth,” Bentley spat, leaning back in the chair. “There’s no gray area between an honest person and a liar.”
“What-“
“You just gave me an entire spiel over keeping secrets just to go and keep secrets. So what, you’re allowed to but I’m not? I’m supposed to let it slide when you do it, but you’re allowed to get upset at me? Sounds pretty hypocritical,” Bentley hissed. Asten’s eyes went cold again, his expression darkening.
“You have to tell me where you’re going because you’re an innocent little nepobaby who’s naivety will get you killed,” Asten spat back. “You don’t know half the shit that goes on in this world — I do.”
“… So, because you had a shitty life, the rules don’t apply?” Bentley asked, tapping his fingers on his arms. “You’re allowed to go do whatever you want and expect me to just sit here at your command like a dog?”
“I’m trying to protect you,”
“Bullshit. That just sounds good. If you were actually trying to protect me, you wouldn’t leave the three youngest roommates in the dorm overnight just to go get drunk out of your mind,” Bentley was practically fuming at the ears, but he made doubly sure not to raise his voice too loud. “I wouldn’t even care about you going out and getting wasted if you’d just tell me first!”
Asten rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands. “Why’s it such a big deal all of a sudden?”
“It was a big deal to you yesterday,” Bentley replied. “But I guess that doesn’t matter, since you’re a hypocrite and all.”
Asten was glaring daggers. “Bentley.”
“Tell me I’m wrong,” He ordered, locking eyes with Asten and forcing them to stay there no matter how uncomfortable it was. “You said something. You did the opposite. Tell me you’re not a hypocrite.”
Asten was pissed — Bentley could tell. He had this cold sort of feeling that radiated from him when he was really mad; one that would make passersby afraid he was gonna punch them if they got too close. He opened his mouth to reply, but Bentley beat him to it.
“I may be younger than you, but you can’t walk all over me anymore. You helped train that into me,” Bentley muttered. “So if you’re allowed to go do whatever you want whenever you want without telling me, so am I.”
“Bentley-“
“And I’ll start by telling you, now that it’s convenient for me, that I snuck out of the dorm and stayed with a girl last night. All night,”
Asten’s horrendously-pissed-and-angry face cracked a little to reveal something like disbelief, and vaguely, shock. “Yeah, sure you did.”
“Unlike you, I’m not a liar. Ask Bellamy, he had to let me back in this morning. Or you can consult my call history and find where I asked him to let me in,” Bentley replied, pulling his phone out of his pocket and tossing it on the desk with a bam! “Or maybe you can dwell on the fact that I was sleeping in the living room in different clothes than I went to bed in?”
Asten didn’t say anything, but his mouth was open, like he was debating on it.
Then he huffed deeply, like he was really irritated. “Who was it?”
“Not everything I do is your business,” Bentley mocked, rising from the desk chair and pushing it in, grabbing his phone and shoving it back in his pocket. “I’m done arguing with a wall.”
“Where are you going?” Asten asked as Bentley approached the door.
He swung it open, glancing back at Asten just long enough to say: “Maybe I’ll tell you when it’s convenient.”
Then he left their room, and he left their dorm, going nowhere in particular.
Everything in high school was bullshit.
--
tag list that never works lmao
@fleur-alise @sarcopterygiian @gayboss-too-close-to-the-sun
@xiaonothere
@skylathescholarly @flyrobinflyy
#batfamily#batman#oc; bentley#oc; bentley whittaker#batboys#oc; asten#oc; asten evans#oc; bellamy#oc; bellamy callahan#oc; varian bray#oc; varian#oc; koa mcclaine#oc; koa#oc; valor torres#oc; valor#oc; rockie winchester#oc; rockie#oc; summer#oc; summer mccall#oc; vera levante#oc; vera#oc; layla benjamin#oc; layla#oc; georgia vallie#oc; georgia#mb; project: killcode#bruce wayne#tim drake#dick grayson#jason todd
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angst with toji x reader…… featuring baby megumi.
Toji was a stubborn man. Which was why it was always SO difficult when you got into an argument with him. He would always cut you off mid-statement to make a point that barely matched, or call you dramatic once you started crying about the fact he yelled at you. He was mad. You barely remembered what exactly the two of you were fighting about, but you didn’t care. You just knew he was absolutely pissed, you were upset, Megumi was distracted by TV across the house..
“You know what?! Im done. I’m fucking done toji. Your not even listening to me right now so i’m not even gonna try. Don’t call me, don’t text me, you can throw away the clothes I have here, and tell Megumi i’m not coming home.”
You didn’t even let him comment on it before you grabbed a small purse you had brung over and left, by the time he realized what you were doing and chased after you, you were already driving down the road.
He angrily slammed his head back against the wall, sliding all the way down. The anger was fading off into sadness now. He really did not want you to leave. Just the thought of you not coming home to him, was making him feel like crap. He didn’t want to be alone. He didn’t want to go back to his cold, empty, lonely apartment. He didn’t want to not see you anymore. He felt hopeless.
“damn it…”
He quietly whispered to himself, trying to get a hold of his emotions.
Megumi waddled into his room, staring up at his dad with those big green eyes. He would have to break the news that his ‘mommy’ (which he would call you) wasn’t coming home..
He felt like kicking himself because he couldn’t control his damn temper and he had to be so damn harsh to you. He should’ve just stopped arguing with you and not called you sensitive, dramatic, and everything under the sun... He should’ve just listened to you instead of talking down to you. He felt guilty and it’s was eating him up inside. He was trying to hold himself together so he wouldn’t break down in front of his son.
Megumi waddled closer to his dad, reaching up to tug on his shirt. He couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath as he looked down at Megumi, his heart clenching when he saw the little boy look up at him innocently. He knew he was going to have to tell him that you weren’t going to be around anymore. He swallowed the lump in his throat and looked down at his son.
“Hey kid.”
He didn’t know how to say it without making the boy upset. He wanted to be gentle with him. Megumi could tell something was wrong just by the way his dad looked. He’d never seen his dad look so upset before. He was confused and he tugged on his dad’s shirt again, looking up at him with big eyes.
”..Where’s mama?”
That question was like knife through his heart. He took a shaky breath as he picked up his son into his lap. He hated that he had to do this. He hated having to tell his son that his mom wasn’t coming around anymore.
*”..Mama isn’t coming back, buddy..”*
He spoke, trying to steady his voice. He didn’t want to cry in front of his son. Megumi’s little face scrunched up in confusion. He really didn’t understand. He didn’t know why his dads girlfriend wasn’t coming back. He was sad and confused and he didn’t like it.
“Why?!”
He whined, now starting to look upset. He felt even more like crap now that his son was starting to get upset. He was already on the verge of crying himself as his own eyes got watery, his chest tightening in guilt. He had to be strong for his son.
”..She’s not coming back because daddy was mean to her.”
He admitted, his voice cracking halfway through the sentence. He couldn’t hold it back anymore. Seeing his son like this hurt him. He really did not want to have this conversation with his son.
Megumi’s eyes started to fill with tears and he started to cry. He didn’t understand. He didn’t like that his dad was mean to his mom. He didn’t like that she wasn’t coming back. It was upsetting.
“Make her come back, daddy! I want mama!“
He wailed through his sobs. He felt his heart break hearing his son cry like this. It was like a dagger to the chest. He held Megumi closer, starting to cry himself. His hand gently rubbing his back to soothe him, he tried to force his voice to speak, but he was so choked up, it just came out in broken sobs.
“I can’t..it’s just gonna be me and you now.”
——-
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thinkin’ about when the director of ambush marketing was the wrong cog body type and the doomsday event was delayed for A Hot Minute
maybe this was just surlee’s first anomaly and he said “eh whatever it hasn’t been that long” and decided to rewrite the whole damn timeline again
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North and Simon: (shaking hands on killing Simon potentially)
#detroit become human#north wr400#simon pl600#markus rk200#josh pj500#jericho is just... so funny to me as like. how they function (or dont)#like im v glad that i did a Good Job my first run and no one hated me but i also felt like a very distraught parent#in regards to how markus is just able to either hurt them (by suggestions OF THE OTHERS IN THE GROUP)#or help them because hey what the fuck i just dragged simon to safety and now north wants me to kill him#and then simon like oh no north got shot you should leave her BUT ! i saved her and made simon happy#so its like you know what they have to have some animosity but also respect#i feel like i wanna see more of north and simon being buddies ... and i might have to do that myself#but i also apologize if this is ooc for them because i really did only just play through once and got a not good end#i probably missed a lot of lore and stuff so im v sorry if im Messing Them Up#its currently just me liking their designs and vibes and hoping im not ruining other fans lives by being wrong#and i honestly dont know when north would kill simon but hes on her possible victims list#so since both of their victim lists include themselves for suicide it just reminded me of the meme#with im so mad im gonna (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health)#and it was like yeah watch north be like im gonna (well if i cant kill myself because markus said no suicide) murder someone
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journalists underestimate the magnitude of my addiction and how far i'll go for the bit
#snap chats#im lying i physically could not marathon this i got school LMAO BUT IMAGINE#my god speaking of school i signed up for a japanese history class. because of course i did#i also needed an extra class and i didnt know what else to put LMAO but i might swap it or somn#thinkin i should get back into theater..... i got like two months to decide anyway#i was thinking about how im gonna play IW during streams... if the lord will let me i might stream for 2~3 hours or so#im putting such a small time limit due to Aforementioned School but also idk if my computer can record any longer than that#when i tried saving the video to my flashdrive it only lasted about two some hours right ? maybe 3 if i remember right#i decided to record to my computer's hard drive instead of the usb since it has more space so maybe i can record longer#ill prob do a test run later today and record a nonsense video. i WILL delete it i just wanna see what the limit is#cause my plan is to just Record One -> Upload It -> Delete OG yk. Lazy Susan type of plan#didnt mean to type out my whole gameplan in the tags LOL BUT HEY I WANTED TO TALK BOUT IT AT SOME POINT#my final message is that ive Hopefully preordered the ichi statue. i say Hopefully cause i am once again doing it through jp rabbit#and i didnt get the confirmation it was successful yet so I Will Simply Wait.#point is it was a lot cheapter than i thought it was going to be <3 yay <3#ok im running out of tags tl;dr im gonna marathon IW until my eyes bleed BYYYE
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ive decided that andoras almost always has crazy makeup and wigs on simply bcus its fun for him. and everin doesnt see him without any of it on until after the birthday party debacle and loses it slightly bcus she thought that was his real hair the whole time wdym youre BALD (hes not bald his hair is just short)
#my post#the wondrous oc tag#madineau#the lore is stored in the tags#world so beautiful. i love making shit up about my ocs#did this partly bcus i wanna include more ridiculous hairstyles in this bcus i realized that i can#and this is perfect for andoras bcus he literally doenst do anything all day anyways. so he just gets up spends half the day gettnig ready#and then spends the rest of it hanging around ev and bothering her#theres a bit of bright colors and markings like aposematism. like watch out hes toxic do not approach#like ev gives a shit though#ANDDDD ive managed to incorporate MOON SYMBOLISM. bcus god what is this story if not just the moon a thousand times over for no reason#(the reason is it was like 2 am i was delirious on sharpie fumes and got really emotional about the moon out of nowhere)#so like when hes first introduced his makeup includes a new moon. new beginnings and all that#during the birthday party hes got a 1st quarter moon. for intention. bcus thats when ev and an get a little normal about each other#and an specifically realizes oh hey. i actually liek this person. and i think she likes me too. i dont want this to ever stop.#smilesss he realizes this while theyre dancing. and ev is laughing and relaxed and SMILING for once and an wishes he could watch that smile#forever...#dreamy sigh. ive had that scene living in my head for years now#i think i came up with that after reading knifetrick. bcus i loved the party scene soooooo much <33#where was i. right moon makeup.#so in the very very very end andoras has a full moon#sealing of intention slash continuing the cycle. because its implied hes gonna overthrow the government and kill the current leaders#thats a big jump from where we just were. bear with me here a lot happens in this story#like the birthday party and that tender moment. is interrupted by the rev squad showing up and trying to convince a crowd of people to#murder ev#which more or less works pretty easily btw. they all just go 'ok bet' as if they werent attending HER party.#its fine its whatever its ok. ev doesnt think theres anyone she can truly trust but she does so anyways and just prays they dont turn on he#bcus the only people she has left in the world are her 2 advisors who hate her and her best friend who also maybe hates her
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8i've been thinking about the last asks i got today. and i think it's better for me to take a step back from this account. i know the anon didn't mean anything by it, but i still feel like i am being a negative presence on here and weirding people out with who i am is nothing i want. so, i am not deleting or anything. i am just gonna be less present with sharing personal things or leaving tags. I'll probably be more active on my second account where i don't have that many followers :)
#i guess it affected me more than i'd like to#i don't want to make people uncomfortable#and i am sorry if i did that with any of my posts i know they have been overly emotional and maybe a bit insane#it's true that i am trying to deal with losing and finding peace i am not very good at this due to my intense emotions#and my fear of loneliness and losing people. i am also in a very bad depressive episode. i am aware that this isn't an excuse for any#of my behavior. i never had a support system so dealing with all this on my own and getting no therapist who is willing to see you#it's a downer. guilt is eating me alive and my mental condition is the something that has ruined a lot for me but it has never before done#such a terrible job before. recovering from that and dealing with the aftermath of this is exhausting and has taken a toll on my physical#and mental health i know this post doesn't mean anything to most of all and is at best confusing but i guess it's my poor attempt#of avoiding that people will hate me. i don't want to self-pity more than i already did. but i do that all on my own already.#i know that life is so much more difficult than fiction and you can't expect miracles or believe in faith to fix anything#i know there is no cure to who i am. i can only try to navigate it better in the future. it doesn't mean that i can't regret what i did.#that i can't feel guilty about it. i know that won't change anything but i am also trying to get better and i understand if that's not#visible. i just have to believe that one day it will be enough for people to say 'hey. i know you are fucked up.#and you hurt me and you've been a bitch. but we'll work on it. i believe in you.' otherwise i have to believe that this loneliness#is all there is and that i'm gonna die hollow#i don't want much. i just want some patience and peace#i want to believe that i am worthy of love and that i can get a future. and yes. me talking about wanting a wife and this stupid apple pie#life... maybe it's cliche and stupid but i have been alone for years and i am so tired of fighting. is it so bad that i don't want to do#this alone? and that goes for friends as well. i want to cook for people built things and tend to a garden to take care of animals#and to create instead of destroying for once.#i don't know why i am still writing i guess when the dam breaks... again. i am sorry for ever making people uncomfortable or even hurting#them that was never my intention. i promise#so i really hope. whoever is reading this. i hope you are doing alright. i hope you had/have a good day. tell the people you care about#you love them and enjoy the little things. read that book. eat that chocolate or do whatever brings you joy. the world is so difficult to#navigate but you are doing such a great job by just existing. you are making this world a better place with the light you radiate#the last thing I want to do something I never can forgive myself for is hurting people#not only but especially the ones I care about. but beyond that those I barely know too because I care about you guys too#I just don't want that... I want to leave the world better than I found it but I'm having a hard time doing it due to this stupid fucking#brain of mine.
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was talking to my mom about how the adoption process worked when they adopted my brother and man some people truly are just scum
#all of their process was basically public? since there wasn't a private institution back then (not sure how it is now)#so it was basically women who were 100% sure they were going to give their baby away no matter what#and then when the day came they were like noo i'm keeping the baby (which should be good right?)#and then they would do a follow up and turns out there was no baby because they were basically sold illegally#obviously to people that were not from chile#because what um hospitals? no it's not hospitals but adjacent i guess#what they would do is that they would have a program basically were pregnant women would be like hey this kid once they're born?#i'm gonna abandon them basically. so they hospital would get in contact with the social service#the social service would contact people that wanted to be parents. the they would come and there was no baby because they were sold#obviously didn't happen to my parents but what did happen was the social service lady asking them#if they wanted to see the kid first in case they ''didn't like him''#and my dad being my dad got furious because what the hell that's my kid no matter what#and the sad reality was that a lot of adoptive parents would like to look at the kid first to see if they liked them as if they were what#a fucking couch#anyways. everyday i'm more thankful for how open my mom is about this whole thing and how it was#she still has the name and all the info of my brother's biological mother in case he wants to contact her again#(which hasn't happened since he had his very big and bad bipolar crisis)#but yeah idk i admire my mom a lot she's always trying to do what's best for everyone even if sometimes it comes out a little harsh#b.txt
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#GAH hate not knowing how ppl feel about me#bc i used to be SUPER close friends w this person like they were ~25% of th reason i came back to my uni town after moving away last summer#and i keep texting them like ' hey we should meet up sometime! ' and they respond ' omg YES 100% i have SO much i need to catch you up on !#unfortunately i am out of town every single day. also so busy. '#and like yeah okay college very busy life very crazy. but how are you out of town every single day and also why have you NEVER reached out#and i saw them in person at target and they seemed genuinely pleased to see me! and also said something like#' we gotta hang out i have so much to tell you!! *ill* message *you* ' in a way that seemed to convey guilt at ^^ all that#but then how in the WORLD do you happen to be driving out of town immediately after the one event i know we'll both be going to???#and also casually gracing over the fact i also mentioned getting dinner beforehand??#also i dont know any reason they wouldnt like me unless its one of those ' im autistic and didnt notice you getting fed up w me '#or if theyre just actually that busy or too anxious to see people or anxious to reach out or fucking whatever#and like even when i saw them at target they told me a bunch of stuff that i dont tthink youd say to a random acquaintance#which if they do still like me makes sense! bc we were super duper close once! but doesnt make sense if they dislike me/want me to go away#like UGH just either ask me to hang out or say yes to a hang out or tell me to fuck off already!!!!#oh and ALSO the one time we DID have plans we didnt set an exact time but they texted me at like 11 and said ok we can hang out now until 2#or they texted me at 11 and said ' i work at 2 but i dont think thats gonna be a problem also are you okay w hanging w my roomies too '#and i know their roomies so thats fine but i was like ??? WHAT shouldnt be an issue? r you gonna call off to hang out for more than 3 hrs?#or are you gonna friend break up w me so it wont take 3 hours#anyway i was like uhhh shit we didnt set a time so im actually at a tattoo place like an hour away w my roomie?#so we rescheduled for the next day when uh oh they hung out w someone who was exposed to covid so had to cancel again!#i cant think of a single reason they wouldnt like me except that they never did but we had an activity together so they were stuck w me#and they seemed genuinely happy to see me and also seem upset declining plans but like if thats true what the FUCK is happening????#anyway this was a mile long if you e read this far i love u if you have tips feel free to reply or dm me
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