#like he had a lot fo sex and and hookups but he jumped at the chance to have a meangingful relationship

[courtillyy]

moodboard: arospike aceflux paxton hall yoshida

[bribe-the-door]

Don’t Blame the Drunk Calling [1]

the one where you’re harry’s roommate and you both have messy dating lives

a/n: hello sweetest babes!!! it’s han -- i know i haven’t been writing much fo anything for ... like a year now? but we’re BACK! we are back and kicking!!! this is the beginning of something i’d like to continue so ... stay tuned :) ily! <3

____________________________________________________

“What are you smiling about?” you asked, sarcasm lingering in the tone of your voice.

Harry sat opposite of you, legs curled up under himself. His face glowed from both the light of his phone screen and the words being sent his way. Watching his lips twitch into a smile made your own stomach churn.

He remained quiet as he typed; the clicks of his keyboard and the whoosh! of a sent text served as a response to your question.

“Well?” you pressed.

Your second attempt hung in the air between you two. He chuckled under his breath and continued to scroll through his phone, probably looking for an emoji of somesort.

“Hm?” Harry’s eyes never left his phone.

You sighed, voice quiet. “Nevermind.”

He looked up at the change in cadence, shaking his head as if to refocus himself. His phone was then turned over on its face, a silent promise of ‘I’m listening’.

“What is it?”

It was your turn to bite at your lip now, except this wasn’t in a flirty way. Or a smirking way. There was nothing cute about the jealousy you so fervently tried to hide on a daily basis, living with the boy who stole your heart last summer.

And then promptly stomped it into the ground.

“Y/n,” he interrupted your self-spiral. “What?”

You shrugged it off as if you hadn’t been the one to press in the first place. “I don’t know, it’s just my job as your best friend to pester you about the new girl in your life.”

Harry’s eyes widened, a nervous laugh following in suit. “The new what?”

“Isn’t that why you’re smirking at your phone?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know.”

You narrowed your eyes in his direction, wishing for laser-vision or something of the like.

He pursed his lips, pondering. “Her name’s Elise, not that you’d care to know.”

Elise.

The pounding of your heart sped up and simultaneously grew quiet as it fell into your stomach.

She wasn’t the first, after the both of you… you know.

There was Brie, Anna, the girl you only saw once because she snuck out in the middle of the night, then Sage, most recently Elisabeth.

And now Elise.

“Y/n?” He asked again.

“What?”

He paused, holding onto your gaze for mere seconds too long. “Are you jealous?”

“Why would I be jealous? Of a girl I haven’t met? That you’ll probably bring here for a few dates and then hook up?” The words steamrolled from your lips. “Not everything is about sex, you know.”

Harry bit back a laugh, shaking his head.

“What?”

“Sounds exactly like someone who needs to get laid would say.”

Your mouth fell open with a spread of embarrassment across your cheeks. “What the hell--!”

Harry stood quickly, throwing another taunting smirk in your direction. “I’ll leave you with that to ponder. I, on the other hand, have a date.”

You muttered a string of curse words under your breath, bidding him farewell and silently hoping he’d stub his toe on the way out.

“We’ll try to be quiet tonight, you know, when I’m getting laid.”

“Oh fuck off!” A throw pillow was, accurately named, and launched in his direction. His laughter could be heard even once he was down the hall to his room.

Maybe he was right.

*** It had been a while since… you know. It had happened. And you wished that period of absence was lesser than, but given the way things were working these days, it wasn’t something to depend on. Your own relationship with hookups and casual dating wasn’t anything to boast aboutーthey were few and far between (when they did happen).

You preferred to keep to yourself; nights spent alone with a good show and a glass of wine far more filled your fancy than any night with a stranger, but lately, you’d been feeling rather lonely. Like you wanted to be needed.

Desired.

Even if just for a moment (or hour, or so).

Harry had long since left the living room and you sat in silence, pondering. The buzz of an earlier glass of wine lingered in your head and only encouraged your decision to open the dreaded app on your phone.

Your profile, carefully curated with pictures of you laughing with friends, moody mirror selfies, and a screenshot of a fuckboy’s attempt to slide in your DMs (as a warning of what not to do), sat vacant for a few months now. There were a few unread messages in your inbox and you deleted them all. It was time to start over.

All to prove Harry wrong.

Swiping like it was a video game, you matched and matched and super-liked anyone to your liking. Bryan, Timothy, a few Chrises, some guy named “T”, they all piled up somewhere on the internet as your next potential fling. It only took a few minutes on this dull Saturday night for Chris #3 to message you.

“Hey cutie” was all that you earned from your search, and you played along, wine helping your case.

Chris didn’t keep your attention long, though, and you continued swiping out of boredom. It was then that you swiped to Aly’s profile.

It was a curious feeling, the way your heart rushed to a rapid beat in your chest. Pausing, you studied over her face in the first picture. Then the second. And the third, fourth, and fifth, too.

How did…

You tapped to the settings of your Tinder app, confused. Indeed, it was set to “Everyone”. When this happened, you were unsure. Maybe Harry had gotten a hold of your phone one Wine Wednesday and changed it as a prank. (Not that it really was a prank…).

You peered over your phone sheepishly, as if you were expecting Harry to jump out from behind the couch and cause a scene. Like you were somehow 13 again, hiding from your parents and reading Seventeen magazine. A slow burn flourished over your cheeks, ignited by the juvenile sparks in your chest.

You pressed the settings button again, biting your lip as you did so. It wasn’t as ceremonious as you were making it out to be, but your body had other plans.

Women only.

The checkmark sealed the deal, and that was that.

A new kind of rush filled your ribcage, holding back the beating of your heart that very likely could be heard from across the room. You swiped back to the main screen, Aly’s profile still front and center. Carefully hovering over the picture of her face, you paused before swiping right.

To your surprise, it highlighted in blue and showed your pictures together.

“Matched!” it said in a celebratory font.

Your phone hung in your hand absent-mindedly as you sat, sinking further into the couch. Does this mean something? You wondered. Am Iー?

Before you could answer, your phone vibrated in your hand.

A single “1” shone like a beacon over the Messages tab in the app. Something told you it wasn’t Chris #3 trying to redeem himself from earlier.

Aly’s name was illuminated at the top of your screen, her profile picture shrunk down to fit the small space but her smile was still just as friendly. Your heart picked up in its cadence, thudding prominently in your chest.

It’s just a girl, y/n, you thought to yourself. It’s just a girl, on a dating app, that I matched with.

Aly: Hi :)

Okay, simple. Concise. Not a lot to work with but certainly not a lot to get worked up over, either. Your fingers danced over the screen, going back and forth between the “Hey” with a smiley or a “What’s up?” and a wink. Was a wink too forward? What if you responded with the same thing she sent. Would she think you’re an amateur? That you don’t know how to talk to girls?

Aly: Are you from around here? Your third picture is from the Firefly, right?

You paused again, rethinking everything.

You: Hey! I am, the Firefly is my go-to. You?

Send.

It was almost instantly Aly sent a response, excited someone else was familiar with her favorite spot, too.

Had you ever crossed paths?

The conversation flowed between the two of you seamlessly, your anxiety fading away as Aly provided most of the questions and seemed eager to talk. Before you knew it, an hour had gone by and you’d ignored a few other texts to talk to this random stranger.

Harry had sent a few, one was the link to a tiktok, one of those “the person who sent you this…” (it was about food; how typical) and a text reminding you he’d be bringing Elise home tonight. He made sure to remind you that he ‘apologized in advance for the noise’ and that he’d ‘make it up to you’.

Aly sent another message, the banner across the top of your screen pulling your attention from Harry’s attempt at pushing your buttons.

Aly: You down to get drinks sometime?

The butterflies started their rampage in your belly all over again, this time much more intensely than the last.

She wanted to get drinks? Already?

You weighed your options: one; drinks with a hot girl at Firefly or two; get wine and bring it back to your apartment while Harry had this Elise girl over.

There was nothing to lose with your offer, so you swiftly typed out a suggestion and hit send without second thought.

You: Wanna come to mine and drink some wine? I just baked banana bread :)

Her response was immediate, a quality you quite admired about Aly: she was bold and brave, exactly the opposite of yourself.

Aly: Red or white? ;)

***

The moments before Aly was slated to arrive were the longest of your life. If you’d thought your heart was beating quickly before, this was overdrive. You shared your address, along with the promise of baked goods, and waited.

A soft knock at your door sent your feet flying to the entryway. You brushed the hair from your forehead and fidgeted with the buttons on your flannel, and with one more deep breath, you unlocked the deadbolt.

Aly was shorter than you, only by a few inches, but her bold eyes drew you right in. She smiled, sly and curious, offering the black plastic bag of wine before greeting you.

“Hi.”

Her salutation hung in the air between you as you took her in. She was just like her pictures and she drew you in all the same as she had on Tinder.

“Hey,” you answered, taking the bag from her outstretched hand. “Come in?”

You stepped back to allow her to shuffle past you, her coat already coming off before the door shut behind the two of you.

“This is cozy,” she said. “Just you?”

“No, I have a roommate. He’s bringing someone home tonight, supposedly.”

She chuckled, “Interesting living with a guy, huh?”

“Yeah, you could say that.”

You took her coat and tossed it over a dining table chair. Aly had already made herself at home on the couch, opposite of the corner you normally staked out as your own. She continued to look around, biting back a smile every so often.

The string lights around the crown molding illuminated her face with a soft orange glow as she took everything in. She tossed her phone aside, arms outstretched across the sofa behind her. Her smile was everything, and you almost forgot why she was even here.

“Do you, uh, want me to open this?” You nodded toward the bag in your hand, its weight bringing you back into the moment.

Aly nodded, “Want me to come with?”

“Sure.”

She pushed off of the couch to follow you into the small kitchen, finding a spot in front of the sink. It was comfortable having her here, the way she just ‘fit’ in without even trying. Like it wasn’t new territory for her.

Her arms were folded in front of her chest and she watched you intently.

Aly had bought both red and white, taking your answer of “depends on the day” a bit literally.

“So…,” she started, stepping in closer. “What’s your story?”

“Hm?”

“You know,” Aly laughed, “Why’re you on Tinder?”

Luckily you were searching through the silverware drawer when she asked, intent set on finding the corkscrew. “Just a 24-year-old thing to do, isn’t it?”

“Not really.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” you sighed, turning to face her. “My roommate and I have a bit of a bet going.”

Aly raised an eyebrow, asking you to continue. You found the corkscrew and shut to the drawer with your hip, shyly turning back toward the counter with the wine to divert the attention from yourself.

“It’s stupid. He’s … he’s a bit of a player.”

“Okay, and?”

So she wasn’t going to let this go. “He brings a lot of girls home, and I don’t bring many guys home.”

The bottle of red popped! open and you set the corkscrew aside. You felt Aly step in closer behind you, offering a glass from the counter.

“I’m not a guy, though.”

“Yeah,” you laughed, feeling the warmth returning to your cheeks. Your tone shifts, voice getting quieter. “You’re not.”

“So what does that mean?”

You hand her a glass, generously full of the deep red alcohol, and shrug. “I’m not sure. What does that mean?”

She cocks her head to the side and smirks again. You’re painfully aware of how she licks her lips before speaking, and watched intently as she took a sip of the wine.

“Do you want it to mean something?”

“Well I mean,” you stammer over your words, “If you want it to mean something?”

Aly stepped toward you, closing in on the space between the lot of you. Her glass is raised, she nods in your direction, and you tap your glass to hers. You both take another sip and she waits to respond.

“I think it would be fun, you know. For it to mean something,” she shrugged. “I mean, isn’t that why you invited me over?”

Your eyes grew wide and you laughed nervously. “I didn’t think it would actually work.”

“Wouldn’t work? Oh, baby,” Aly shook her head, “I knew from the moment I saw your picture that I wasn’t going to just let you go.”

Baby. Your head swirled with thoughts, overwhelmed to say the least. “Sorry, I, uh,” you giggled to yourself again, flustered. The sip you intended to take was more of a gulp, and then another.

Aly joined your laughter, touching your shoulder in efforts to console you. “Was that too forward of me? I’m sorry, I forget that this is new for some people.”

“How’d you know?”

“You’ve been picking at your nails since the moment I got here and talking at the speed of light,” Aly leaned back against the sink. “You’re an open book, y/n.”

She took a long drink from her glass, now half empty, and stood silently.

“An open book, hm?”

“Yep. Totally.”

You paused for a second, the wine in-hand going down much faster than you anticipated. “What else do you know about me then?”

Aly’s eyes widened, a smile creeping up on her face. “Let me see.”

It was your turn to lean back against the counter and wait for what she had to say. Her eyes sized you up and down, and she hummed a “hmm…” just for good measure.

“Shy. But only when you don’t know her well. Confident, but that’s mostly with the help of wine. This roommate? You like him, at least a little. But you’re on Tinder… matching with women? Interesting character development in my book at least.”

You shook your head, embarrassed at the impressive correctness that she boasted in her assumptions. “Mostly right.”

“Only mostly?”

“Yeah,” you hid behind another sip of wine, “You forgot about the part where I’m really into you.”

“Oh,” Aly reached behind her to place the now-empty glass on the counter, stepping closer to you once more. “You’re really into me?”

You nodded.

She took another step in. “How much?” Her voice was nearly a whisper.

You could hardly hear her, over the hammering of your heart, but your brain was busy working up a witty response.

“How much, baby?” Aly pressed.

She was dangerously close to you now, only inches from your face. The mention of you being ‘confident’ but ‘mostly with the help of wine’ was no truer than in this moment, and you didn’t answer her with words. But instead, a kiss.

Aly didn’t hesitate to kiss back, hardly leaving you the time to place your wine glass (empty, too) on the counter. She leaned into you and wrapped her arms around your neck, pulling you closer. She knew exactly what she was doing.

It was just like kissing boys, you quickly realized, except this felt better. Aly led, moving her lips in synchrony with yours that, once you two found a balance that worked, made your head spin. The butterflies in your stomach morphed into something more; less about the nerves and more about the want.

You didn’t care about anything in this momentー

ーWhich was exactly when you heard the front door slam shut.

“Y/n!” Harry called out from the entryway. You heard his keys hit the table, along with another thud and the low murmurs of another voice.

Fuck fuck fuckfuckfuck.

“Y/n!” He called again, “Are you evenー?”

He rounded the corner as you pushed out from behind Aly’s grasp, her own surprise catching up with her.

“Oh my god,” you whispered, quickly changing directions to face Harry. “Hi, yes, I’m here.”

Harry eyed you, clearly seeing the person behind you. “Hi…”

“Um, Harry,” you paused, stepping aside to bring Aly into view. “This is Aly.”

Aly spoke up from behind you: “Yeah, I know.”

You turned on your heel. “What?”

Harry hadn’t said anything since seeing Aly and remained quiet in the doorway of the kitchen. He raked a hand through his curls and stared at the ground.

“Hi, Harry.” Aly said, her tone laced with awkwardness.

Oh.

He cleared his throat. “Hey, Aly.”

Oh, no.

“Do you…?”

“Yeah,” they both answered in unison.”

“...know each other.”

________________________________________________

part two coming soon!

[mysecretatticsstuff]

Pranks

Pairing : Jeon jungkook x reader

Word count: 27.3k

Warnings: Smut, Fluff, emotional breakdown.

Summary: You thought you were going to enjoy college. Even with unfortunate events and a poor sleep schedule you were trying to live your best life. Untill one particular kid, aka golden boy of campus came dashing into your life.

College. The place you got excited to go thinking you would finally meet good people, make friends and have the time of your life. And yet here you are, 3 am in the morning just barely hanging in there with a paint brush in your hand finishing up the poster that was supposed to be a group project for physiology class. You have dozed off a couple of times now, with eyes open doing the detailed line work that you suggested not to put in it because of the amount of time it takes. You almost messed it up but your multitasking skills save you. In short you hate college. Or more so, you hate your luck for always putting you in the companionship of the worst people in the world. You can now permanently stamp a "pissed off" warning to your forehead to avoid casualties.

Grumpy wasn't even a mood anymore, it's a lifestyle. And some people just make it real difficult for you to not eat them alive. On top of that list was Mr. Jeon Jungkook. Golden boy, good at whatever he does, loved by everyone he has a conversation with. Well except for you. You on the other hand want to kill him. Not because you're jealous or anything. Heck you would be happy for him if he didn't make your life a living hell. You always wondered what you did for him to hate your existence so much. He kept pulling off weird ass stunts with you. Once he filled your water bottle with chilli tomato ketchup, you took a gulp without knowing and had a red face for a legit hour. Another time he issued the last copy of only book that had the reference you needed and kept it untill a day before the assignment was due. So you had to beg him to give the book to you and complete the whole assignment in one day. (Which was not fun of course). He mixed salt in your drink, splashed water from behind while you were returning to your apartment and what not. At first you thought to ignore him, when the stunts were small. But he just kept doing that shit and you grew angrier. When you asked him, why the heck was he doing that to you he just simply smiled like a devil, winked at you and walked away. That was a year ago, since that day you have been wanting to kill him.

You weren't the aggressive type by nature, your friends would agree that you were the most calm and collected, amiable and open minded friend in the group. Your personality was more of a mediator than a murderer. But the golden boy brought out the beast in you. When you realised that he isn't stopping with the obnoxious pranks. You started pulling off your own as a revenge. To be honest you didn't even regret it. Heck it was even cathartic. Once you hid his clothes while he was in the gym, so basically he had to wait inside the bathroom for the whole day in a towel. (You took his phone too so that he couldn't call anyone for help). You "accidentally" splashed juice onto his crisp white t-shirt before an early morning class. You wrapped his bike with cling film and bubble wrap. It was tiring but worth it when you saw his face, glaring daggers at you cause he was getting late for class and couldn't leave his apartment. You made sure you smiled sweetly at him when he saw you that day.

By now, everyone in your friend circle and both of your departments knew how you both jumped at the first opportunity to ruin each others day. You stopped questioning Jungkook because he never answered instead you focused on how to attack him in the best way.

The past two months have been extra rough for you, both personally and academic wise. Hence, jungkook's bickering has had you in a new level of pissed. A level you didn't know existed. Honestly you were amazed by the fact that you haven't had a breakdown till now. You didn't get any chance to pull anything off against him and that makes you angrier. I guy you were talking to back and forth has suddenly ghosted you and you are wallowing in all the self pity. You've had less than 4 hours of sleep for the past week because of all the requirements for class. You're just a week away from finishing everything off and you're praying that the devil doesn't make it impossible.

You personally hated Mondays, but who are you kidding everyday feels like a monday now. You head to the library first thing in the morning to finish your paper, a semester worth of work. You settle in starting to type out the last page. About an hour later your phone vibrates.

"Hey where are you?" It was Sunmi your best friend.

"I'm in the library" you wisper shout

"Oh.. i had something urgent to say to you can you come out for a second. I'm almost there."

"Okay, coming" you say.

Outside, sunmi was waiting for you with a book in hand.

"Jeez, y/n you look dead. Do you even sleep anymore?"

You sigh out loud, "Don't ask, i feel like i'm gonna pass out anytime soon. Coffee isn't helping anymore. I think i need drugs"

Sunmi just shakes her head in disbelief "What you need is a good night sleep. And for the drugs part, try sex." She says this in such sincerity that you actually consider it for a second before she laughs.

You laugh too, "Uggh, i can't wait to finally go out this weekend, i'm turning into a hermit. Anyways i'm sure u didn't call me out here to talk about hookups..?"

At this she hands you the book, "Yeah I didn't, but we need to talk about your dry state after you're free tho, but till then here you go. The book that you were searching for, you wouldn't believe how I.. or i should say where I found it I-... "

"Wait... Before you start your essay, i need to finish my paper. I meet you after your classes today. Tell me then. I need to go... Bye!" you hurriedly say before you turn around and enter the library

"But it's about Jungkook... " Sunmi tries to explain. But she realises you can't hear her anymore. She says to herself rather, "I hope you don't find trouble."

You almost reach your designated place when you see him. White T-Shirt and olive green cargos. That little shit, what was he up to again? You hurry to your laptop, only to find him smirking as if he knows some secret you don't.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" You ask. "Ooh.. chill Princess, just thought i'd see you and your work". At the mention of work you wake your computer up. A chill ran down through your spine followed by panic when you couldn't find the document you saved. After a moment, your eyes shot up, glaring dangerously at him. He sat up, folding his arms onto the table. "What's wrong? Can't find something?"

"What the fuck did you do, Jeon?" You wanted to scream bloody murder at him, but you didn't know how were you this calm.

"Tsk, tsk,.. last names now huh? Someone's angry. Tell me princess, will I win a prank of the year trophy this time?"

You were unable to speak. Your blood boiled, you wanted to punch him, better kill him. When you didn't reply he continued. "I hope you remember what your wrote in your thesis, even better if your typing skills are on fire, cause you need to rewrite within one week" He was putting a full display of his evil grin. Clearly amused by the situation he put you in. But you slowly realised what he meant. You quickly went to the recycle bin of your computer to test your luck, but soon saw that the demon had already deleted it from the bin too. Your heart sank. This was not fair. You wanted to cry now. Months and months of your hardwork, gone now. What the fuck was that bitch even thinking. This was not a joke anymore. It was your finals. Yes you both have done horrible things to each other but you made sure that it never got out of line. But him deleting your final thesis. This was definitely out of the line. You could not rewrite the whole thing even if you tried in a week. It would never get close to the original one. You would miss many points and the writing style. Damn you for not keeping an extra copy of the thesis somewhere. But again, you never thought Jungkook would go this low. You didn't even want to think how he figured out the passcode for your laptop. Anger doesn't describe what you were feeling now. You wanted to shut down. When Jungkook didn't hear a threatening or a curse, he chimed in. "Have I pulled the most epic prank on miss y/n that it finally shut her smart mouth?"

You couldn't bare it anymore, all these weeks of running around with just 4 hrs of sleep or sometimes non has made you physically weak. You wanted to escape. You throat hurt from the suppressed tears. But you were not going to give him the satisfaction of seeing you cry. You look at jungkook in the eye. Cold. You stand up, take your things and leave.

All the way to your apartment, you wanted to cry, but you waited till you were inside the safe heaven of your bed.How could he do this to you? When this crazy prank scenario started you couldn't comprehend why the nicest guy ( according to students and professors) had taken a toll on you. Yes you were angry at the beginning. But soon it had simmered down to something else. You couldn't pin point what, exactly. It's true his pranks were delirious and you hated him with all your will, but you couldn't help notice the small ways he made a difference in your life. You were an over-thinker, and this stupid game of pranks with him kept you busy. It was kind of the only source of entertainment for you as academics was no joke. It's difficult to explain but you became more productive because of him. You became a more open person, you made a lot of friends and most of the conversations started with how people don't understand why both of yo fight. Jungkook's friends became your friends too. You found out a lot of things about him through them. One that he was a naturally competitive person. He was a big softy inside they said, that was a bit hard to believe for you. But once he stood up for you when you were being cat called, he was so close to beating the shit out of the boys, nevertheless you dragged him out of it. He walked you to your apartment without even uttering a word. You wanted to say thank you, but the very next day he deflated your tires. And the saga continued. The moral of the story is you definitely had developed a soft spot for him. And this prank was definitely a blow to your ego and your heart.

All the emotions, the exhaustion just came crashing down and you let the dam break. You cried like a baby, whether because of the grief of your lost files, anger or because of him entirely you didn't know. You woke up 3 hours later, with puffy eyes and a blocked nose. You decided you can't let him get to you. So you did what you do best, turn all the frustration into anger towards him. You arranged all the resources for your thesis, and then you sat down with your laptop typing away from the beginning.

You didn't go to college next day, thought it would be better to stay at home and work. There were no classes anyways. You already sent an email to your professor informing him that there was a technical difficulty and you lost your files. Your professor was kind enough to excuse you from all the classes that week to work on your thesis stating that you had good attendance already. Sunmi called you, she felt guilty about the whole thing. "I should have known there was something fishy when that asshole gave me the book. I shouldn't have asked you to come out".

"Hey, it's fine, it's not your fault. I'll kill him with my own hands once everything is over"

"Still.. i feel super bad. Let me know if you need anything. I can bring you books from the library.."

"Thank you sun, i'll let you know if I need anything.. "

"Okay.... Oh and y/n,.. Jungkook came looking for you today. He seemed anxious? kinda worried even. I told that fucker i don't know where you are. Thought you should know"

Jungkook was looking around for you, that's weird. Was he feeling guilty? You always came up with a new prank. Maybe he is just surprised you vanished. "Hmmm... Thanks, i don't want him to know anything about me, Anyways i couldn't careless about him now. See you later".

"Take care y/n".

It was 10 pm when you stood up from your desk, your shoulders and wrists were stiff from all the typing. You realised you hadn't eaten anything for 7 hours now. It was raining heavily, you felt a bit dizzy. When you finally get out of college, this would be a hell of a story to tell though. You missed home dearly, you wanted someone to just hold you and assure you that everything is going to be okay. You took some leftover pizza from your fridge and put it in the microwave. Sometimes living alone just gets to you. All the loneliness, all the times you wished someone was there to comfort you. Your body ached and you felt pathetic about yourself. 'Why me?' was your question. A mixture of all these thoughts and emotions were swirling in your head and you didn't even realize that you were crying now. This was your 3rd breakdown in a span of two days.

"Pathetic" you muttered to yourself. Then your heard the bell ring. Confused at who came by at this ungodly hour, you wiped your tears and went to get the door.

You didn't expect the person you were staring at. Doe eyes slowly scanned you, from your feet to face. Jungkook.

You must have puffy red eyes, you think. God you didn't want him to see you like this. All petty and defeated. He was partially soaked from the rain. Jungkook just stood there, staring back at you. You waited for him to speak, when he didn't, you finally spoke, "What are you doing here?"

"I didn't see you in college today" he replied. Jungkook looked guilty? Sad even. "Why didn't you attend?" He asks next.

"That's non of your business" that came out harsher than you thought. At this his face turned stern. "Were you crying?"

At this point you don't know what or when will you break down. You could already feel a little lump forming in your throat. You looked down at your feet. "Go away, i have work". That came out so fragile and weak, you cringed internally. He stepped in. Searched around in his pocket and brought out a small USB in his hand. You looked at it and then his face.

"Your files" he said.

"You... why would you even... What the fuck? Jungkook!" With every word your voice rose. You thought he was feeling guilty, but he was just a little brat, playing games. All your softness was gone now.

You could tell by his devilish smirk that he was enjoying this way too much. "Who do you think you are?" You saw red with anger. With that much of a volcano boiling inside you, you were not sure what were you doing. Your hand flew up involuntarily. Lets just say, you would have punched him if it wasn't for his quick reflexes. He grabbed your wrist, turned you around. His other arm swiftly snaked around your waist.

"Woah.. easy princess. You sure you can fight me?" He tightens his grip around you. You hate to admit how badly it affects you. You can feel your knees going weak. His taught chest pressed against your back. You can feel him way too much through your thin t shirt. Your face heats up without you wanting it. No, no, no, no, you can't let your stupid hormones get to you. This is crazy. You hate him. Then why do you suddenly feel hot? As if on cue he lowers his head and whispers in your ear, " You okay, sweetheart?"

The new pet name, sends a spike of electricity just between your legs. You bite your lip to control the moan that threatens to leave your mouth. He notices the change too, the tension between you two is growing. You turn around to face him. He lets you. "I hate you."

His arms are still around you, circling your waist. He looks soft, as if relieved of some burden. Your clothes are getting wet from the contact. You don't know what to say, because you can hardly process what is happening. Just then your microwave beeps to your rescue.

You half jump half stumble away from him. "Uggh, i'll bring you a towel. Be right back."

When you return, he is standing in front of the couch. Looking godly. You sneak a glance at his chest and now hardened nipples before landing your eyes on his face. You hand him the towel. As if a half soaked jungkook wasn't enough. He swifty stripped off his t-shirt before drying himself off. You freeze. He looks at you gaze piercing.

"W- why.. did you do that?"

"You need to be a bit more specific sweetheart" he takes a step closer to you. You don't move away.

"The pranks.. why do you hate me so much, that you need to make my life a living hell?" You said softly.

"Helps me sleep at night." He smirks. You rolled your eyes at this. You were about to turn around when he grabs you by hand.

"I don't hate you. It's quite the opposite actually" Your eyebrows shot up at this. "yeah right. You think you can fool me again?" You scoff.

"I know you're a fool sometimes, but to be honest y/n I didn't know you were this dense" He mocked with a smirk.

"What the fuck? Okay that's it. Get out of my house Jeon" you demanded.

"What if I say no, Princess?"

You couldn't believe it. This guy has the audacity to mock you in your own house and then refuse to leave. You were beyond irritated now.

"How do people like you? You're such an ass. Leave before-..." you didn't get to complete the sentence before he pulls you towards him, with such force that you stumble, loose your balance and fall straight on his chest.

HIS BARE CHEST. GOD THIS WAS BAD. You felt your throat getting dry. You couldn't speak. He was firm, you kind of wonder about how much he works out. You could feel his silky smooth skin. You just stared at him, like a deer caught in headlights.

"That's it? You're not gonna 'make me' leave princess?" He says, with his face inches away from you.

*Pull it together y/n* you scold yourself mentally. But you body just froze and it feels hot. You probably have a red face now. You make another mistake of glancing at his lips, which are so damn close, it kinda makes you feel things you can't explain.

Jungkook notices this. He sees right through you. He finally speaks, "If you still haven't got it y/n, i don't know what to do with you... I... " He sighs, "I like you y/n. A lot. And I don't know how to behave when i'm around you, so I keep teasing you.." he says with a sincere look. "And besides.. you look hot, when you are angry at me" He smiles.

You realise you're still holding each other. Your heart is hammering in your chest. He probably can feel it beating too. You want to punch him for being such a jerk, but you also want to kiss him. You're so frustrated, at this point you don't know where the courage came from for what you did next. You kiss him. Out of all the things this was something he did not expect. This time he froze, hands paralyzed at your hips. When he finally came to his senses that it was really happening, he kissed back.

You snake your arms around his neck, pulling his hair into a fist. He lets out a small moan. You pull back, smirking. "No snarky comments now huh Jeon?" you mock, satisfied with his look. His face is flushed. You can feel his member slowly growing. He took some time to overcome his initial shock. Then he said, "No shit.. I'm.. God you're hot" And he is kissing you again. More in control this time. You part your lips to let him enter. His hands cup your face. Your kiss gets heated, one of his hands goes down, between your breasts, to your stomach. Then he waits, as if asking for permission.

"What now?" You say in between your kisses. "No guts for that?" You challenge him. And this time he actually has nothing to say. So you smirk, you take his hand and slowly slip him under your t-shirt.

"Shit". He mutters. He touches your skin, you feel like you're on fire. Goosebumps form all over your body. You feel alive.

The next thing he did left you speechless. He slips both hand under your t-shirt and with one go pulls off your shirt and throws it behind you. You gawk at him in suprise. You can tell he liked the way you reacted because his eyes went dark and he looked at you like he wanted to take you right there. "Jeez Jeon.. give the girl a break" with this you latched on him again. He stumbled back and landed on the couch. Seeing the opportunity, you climb on him, Keeping your weight on your knees, you hover just above his member. You know he wants you to sit on him, but you don't want to give him the satisfaction.

"I think I need to mess with her assignments more often" saying more to himself than to you. "Specially if it leads to this" he stands up keeping you close.

" I heard that you idiot" you were now feverishly unbuckling his pants. He moved his lips to suck you down your jawline, he made sure to nib and suck a bit harder right above your pulse point.

You let out a moan. Your hands are shaking but you somehow manage to undo his pants.

You feel really hot. You were about to pull his pants down when he holds both of your wrists. You freeze, your mind racing at 100 miles per hour. Did you do something wrong? Are you crossing your line? Did he not want this and you took it otherwise? God this is embarrassing.

You eyes were still wide when he said, "I'm not messing around this time y/n. I really do like you" he looks so very sincere that he moves some part of you. But you decided that you ain't gonna let him go so easily.

"I had three mental breakdowns since yesterday". You shot back. At this his eyes turned sad. Like he was really feeling guilty. You felt bad for him now, wondering if it was too harsh.

"I never wanted that, I thought you would argue with me and at the end of it i'd give you the usb, but you looked so angry, and when u left without saying a word I knew i had fucked up. Big time."

You backed off, hands crossed in front of your chest.

Jungkook knew you were angry. But he couldn't deny that he was beyond turned on by this site, you just in your bra and shorts, angry at him. You didn't know how hard he was trying not to turn you around bend you over your desk and fuck you silly.

You noticed that he visibly gulped, he was eyeing you like a prey. But he waited, because you were angry. He wanted to do this right.

"And all this time I kept wondering what wrong did I do to you. I hate you, you know that Jeon?...

"Baby, i'm sorry" he purred stepping closer.

A new surge of arousal hit you at this. "D.. Don't baby me..." The stuttering gave you out. He smirked liked a devil. He closed the gap between the two of you. He hovered above your lips, "forgive me please" he said just an inch away from your lips.

"Kiss me please" you said, not being able to process anything. And he did, he kissed you like there was no tomorrow. Strong and urgent. He cupped your ass and gave a tight squeeze. You let out a moan.

"Do you want to take it to the bedroom?" He asked voice an octave deeper.

You nodded, not trusting your mouth. He lifted you and you wrapped your legs around him. His body was divine, his skin was smooth, heat radiated from him although he was soaked before, lips not sparring you even one 1 second. You could feel his hard on, on your stomach and it felt powerful that you can do such things to him.

"God i've been dreaming about this for so long"

"How long, jeon?" You asked stripping him off his pants and underwear.

"From the moment you debated with your proffessor about a theory in front of your department. I watched you prove your points to him, and i swear to god I had a hard on since. I had to run to the bathroom to give myself some relief " he chuckles at the memory.

"Nerd" Fully naked now, you stare at his body.

"Damn, why are you so hot. This is not fair"

He looked at you. "I see you haven't gotten rid of your clothes yet y/n.. i would like to watch baby"

So you stripped, putting up a show for him. He grabbed you when you were about to take off you panties. He turned you around, pushed you onto the wall, you balanced yourself onto the wall.

"You're gorgeous." He said before slipping his large hand in your panties and cupping your entire sex. He then hurriedly took your panties off. He pressed himself on your behind and you whimpered. He fondled your breasts with one hand and the other slowly slid towards your dripping core.

He kept touching you there, in slow tantilizing movements. You squirmed. He teased you more, knowing you needed some pressure on your clit. He avoided it the most. You were growing anxious.

"Juuunngkook... Please" you draged each syllable.

"What's wrong?" He was enjoying this way too much you could tell.

"I think I deserve being worshipped after what you make me go through kook". You stated with eyes screwed shut.

"Okay, that's fair". At this he dipped one finger inside, testing if you could take him. He gasped at the warmth and the slick that now covered his fingers. He started slow at first, drawing out low moans from you. Then without alarm he added one more digit and started pistoning in and out. You arched your back with pleasure. You were so aroused, and mixed up with your pent up stress and frustration you could already feel something heavy settling at your lower belly, tightening inch by inch.

"Kook... I'm gonna... Cum". You said between grunts.

"You're doing so good baby, cum on my fingers"

You found your release at his praise. Pleasure coursing through your veins with lightening speed. Mid orgasm Jungkook smacks your pussy. And you go crazy at that, so much that you see white. When you finally come to your sense you find his strong arms snaking your waist and holding you, so that you don't fall down. He upper body completely glued to you.

Then you finally speak, head thrown back chest heaving

"I think,.. this was the strongest I ever came in my life"

Jungkook chuckles, "You're welcome". He kisses your shoulder. He slowly lets you go, so that you can stand by your own. You haven't forgotten the fact that, his hard on is pressing onto your back, waiting for the attention.

"So tell me Jeon..." You kiss him slowly moving towards your bed, you stop, look him innocently in the eye and ask, "Where do you wanna cum? My mouth or my pussy?"

"God, if you keep saying such things, I think i can cum just like this" His hand rubs all over your body, "For now, let's put that sinful mouth of yours into good use, okay?"

You nod, leading him to lie down on the bed.

If somebody would have told you, the previous day, that you out of all the people would blow Jeon jungkook, in your bed. You would have smacked them in the face.

You straddle him, and then you start Pickering kisses, first his mouth then his jaw. You have to admit he is a damn good kisser, you get so lost in the kissing that you almost miss that he is grinding himself onto your core. Coating himself with the slick. You feel your pussy tingling. You keep peppering kisses moving to his jawline, then his neck, biting a bit hard on his sweet spot to make sure it blooms with purple afterwards.

At one point he gropes you ass with one hand and pushes you down to grind with more force.

"Change of plans sweetheart. Do you have condoms?" He asks, eye sparking with lust.

You sit straight, a smirk plastered on your face, you bend towards your nightstand, and bring out a foil packet from your drawer.

"Always so fucking prepared" he slaps your ass, you gasp at the sting. He is looking at you, trying to figure out whether you liked it or not. You moan, with your eyes closed.

Jungkook is painfully hard now. If he doesn't put it inside you, he thinks he might burst out of sheer arousal.

"Baby.." he says in a raspy voice

You hurry up at this, you tear the foil and roll it onto him. You raise up to lie down but he grabs you. "Ride me.." voice octaves lower. You're so wet already, you don't think you need extra prepping. You come back to your stance and slowly sink in holding his member for guidance.

Both moan at the pleasure surging through the body. You're impressed by his strength, for holding out so long. He has his eyes tight shut, almost as if everything is too much for him. You feel great, warm where he is inside you. You notice how beautiful he looks under you. Head arched back into the pillow, he looks sexy as hell.

You were zoned out in your thoughts, when he snapped back. "Y/n move". And there you were riding the most handsome guy from campus. And you couldn't believe both of you were making such mind blowing noises. You piston on him for a while before getting tired, thankfully he got the message. He started thrusting his hips up to you with such a velocity that you didn't know was even possible. You could feel another orgasm right around the corner, but you didn't want to finish before him.

"Kook, are you close?"

"So close baby" he whined .

"Me too.. ughhh"

At this he moved his hands from your hips to your breasts. He gave a squeeze. His member was throbbing inside you.

"Come with me y/n" he said through gritted teeth. Suddenly he then spanked one of your boob, while other hand pressed on your clit. You didn't see it coming and the suprise helped to exceeded any pleasure you felt in your whole life. Heat surged from your fluttering cunt throughout your belly. Your orgasm hit you like a truck. It was so strong you couldn't hear anything for some seconds. That followed by ringing of your ears.

You don't know when did he flipped you on your back but you could see his eyes screwed shut, eyebrows drawn together. One last trust and he was coming with you. Your highest high lasted for a while, and left you with aftershocks. Jungkook collapsed on top of you, he hadn't pulled out yet and your sensitive sex was still clenching on him.

You both layed there motionless. It was he who moved first, pulling out with a slight hiss. He tossed his condom with a knot in the trash can and fell back on the bed with a thump. You were still slightly dazed out from the orgasm. He chuckled seeing you in the bliss.

"God, Jeon, i'll be sore tomorrow."

"Well I'll take that as a complement" he smiled.

"That was hot. You're hot" you replied turning away your head feeling shy, all of a sudden.

He grabbed you by your waist and pulled you close, "Damn baby, i didn't know i'd see this side of y/l/n ever."

"Don't stroke your ego too much jeon".

He kissed your shoulder and smiled, "Do you have any idea, how hot and pretty and beautiful you are?"

You looked at him, for the first time you saw how his eyes twinkled while talking to you.

So you just kiss him, which he welcomes whole heartedly.

.

.

The next day you step in the college campus feeling amazing. You have been smiling to yourself since the morning. Since Jungkook gave back your thesis, it was just an hour's work away from getting the final sweep before submission. You hit the library, finish off your work and finally submit it. Your proffessor was not surprised when you told him that Jungkook pranked you again. Even if he found it weird that you had no anger or resentment towards him, he didn't point it out. Now that you felt 10kgs lighter, you had one class to attend and then you were done for the week.

You were heading back to class, when some of your classmates commented, "Hey y/n, we're rooting for you both" . They glimmered while talking to you. Unfortunately they passed by too quickly for you to enquire. You entered the class, confused and zoned out enough that you don't eveb notice how everyone's eyes are on you.

"Y/l/n".

You know that voice. You look towards the last row, he stands, smiling at you. You didn't know what was happening, but your nerves were on fire. Your hands suddenly got clammy and your heart beat started to fasten. You internally scolded yourself.

*Calm down, it's just Jungkook*

He looked nervous? You could tell, it wasn't his usual cocky behaviour. He didn't know what to do with his hands. So he just let them hang. It's weird you think.

As your gears in your brain were working, you start walking towards him. But his voice stopped you.

"Y/n".. then he jutted out his chin, pointing behind you. You could hear your heart hammering.

You turn.

" Y/N Y/L/N, I'M SORRY, SAY YES.. PLEASE?

-J.K. "

There it was written on the white board. In bold capital letters.

Is this a joke? If it's a joke you're not going to be able to walk out of here. Did Jungkook sleep with you so that he could pull the biggest prank in history? But he said all those sweet things yesterday right?

Before you could react, Jungkook spoke behind you. You turned to find him in front of you. You were hyperaware now, the students who were entering silently took their seats looking at you two. This felt like a scene from the movies.

"Y/n, i'm sorry that all this time I made your life a living hell. But i'm also glad because otherwise I wouldn't have the chance to know you." He smiles, his nervousness showing.

He slowly takes your hand. You let him. You already feel the emotions surging inside you. Is he really going to ask you out in front of the whole class?

He takes a long pause. It's almost painful waiting for him to finish the speech. Then he says-

"I'm sorry, Y/n will you be my girlfriend?" He says in one breath.

You gasped. All you could do was just stare at him, staring you back. Suddenly you forgot how to speak. Jungkook breaks the silence. "Say something please, you're killing me here. I -"

"Yes". He stops speaking. Grin slowly spreading from ear to ear.

"ABOUT FUCKING TIME" Someone from the class cheers. Everybody starts clapping. You can't stop smiling. Jungkook pulls you towards him, hugging you. You hug him back.

"Aww guys just kiss each other already!!" Hoseok, spoke with a mischievous smiled plastered on his face.

Jungkook pulled your face towards him for a kiss. It was a sweet kiss. You smirked when you felt how badly he wanted to shove his tongue down your throat but refrained since you're in public. Seeing you smirk, he whispers to you. "I can't wait to take you to my place after this". You shiver at the thought.

____________________________________________

"Mmmmm, kook..." He kissed your neck. You could get used to this. Straddling his lap and making out.

"Yes baby.." u feel his smirk against your skin.

"I have a question." You said, putting a space between you two. He took your hands and started leaving pecks starting from your knuckles moving upwards. You giggled.

"Why didn't proffessor take our class today, like he came 1 hr late, gave us homework and went away. I feel like this has something to do with you asking me out.."

"Y/n, babe out of all the questions you could ask me while making out, you choose this?" He pretended to be offended. You smacked his chest looking at him expectantly.

He started- "Well I might have talked to the prof before class telling him, i kinda need a favour from him.. "

"WHAT?" U couldn't believe this boy.

"Perks of having good rapport with prof. Also i always pay attention in class. You should learn from me y/n.." he looked at you innocently. As if he was not kneading your ass right now.

"Jeon Jungkook please tell me that you at least made up a situation or does our proffessor has first hand knowledge about us being in love.." the L word just slipped out. You acted like you didn't notice. But he surely did.

He winked at you, smiling wide like he got a promotion. "What did you just say?"

"Ugh about what?"

" About us being in something."

He was so smug about this, you knew he had won. You leaned into him.

"Let me show you instead" you wispered in his ear. The hair on Jungkook's body stood up , he had goosebumps. He picked you up towards his bedroom.

"Goddamn I love you".

[checkbio-i-moved-accounts]

Little White Lie

Pairing: Hoseok x Reader

Words: 10.5k (rip)

Summary:  What starts out as a small lie for the sake of your friendship spirals a bit out of control. How will you get yourself out of this one? (College!AU)

Warnings: Angst ahead. Proceed with caution.

A/N: I’ve been working on this for a while I am so so so excited to finally post it! I hope you enjoy! <3

Waking up was very low on the list of things you liked to do, but today it especially sucked. The unpleasant taste of last night’s many mixed drinks lingered in your mouth and your head throbbed lightly. The birds outside chirping up a storm didn’t help the migraine either. It was then you remembered the party last night that you attended with your best friend, Hoseok. The moment Chi Omega announced a party at their place, Hoseok had all but begged you to go with him and you weren’t going to turn him down. However, considering the fact the loud bass from last night seems to still be resonating in your head, you ponder if turning him down would’ve been a smarter choice. Too little too late now, you already went and had to deal with the repercussions.

The first thing you noticed when you opened your eyes was this wasn’t your apartment. That was made apparent by the lack of decor on the white wall you were looking at. You groan and try to stretch before immediately regretting that decision. If the soreness in your legs and the slight ache in your back was anything to go by, you fucked someone last night and it was good. That makes a small smile spread across your face, here’s to hoping they were at least cute. You made another attempt to stretch yourself and were more successful this time around. Your back cracks and you let out a small appreciative sound before turning over to see if your catch of the night was still here. The sight of a sleeping Hoseok with the sheets draped over his stomach was the last thing you expected to see. You became painfully aware of everything around you, any sort of grogginess dissipating as you realize the weight of the situation at hand.

You look down at your bare chest and noticed the marks that littered your torso. You scan the room and see your dress thrown on the floor, along with your panties. Hoseok’s shirt and bucket hat were on his computer chair. Your stomach turned when you noticed his boxers hanging off a lamp. You were 99% sure if you lifted the covers, you’d find Hoseok was as naked as you are. You could only come to one conclusion.

You had sex with your best friend last night.

You’ve always wanted to be intimate with Hoseok but not like this, not a drunken hookup that you couldn’t even remember. Panic started setting in when Hoseok started stirring next to you. As you watched him nuzzle more into the pillow under him, you begged all the forces in the universe to keep him asleep. It seems whoever was out there heard your plea because Hoseok stayed in his state of slumber. You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding as you rubbed your temples.

What now? Do you stay? Do you leave? Do you wake him? You didn’t know what to do, but as you remember the state of panic you were almost sent into over Hoseok waking up there’s one thing that sets into your mind.

He can’t know you two had sex.

It would ruin your years of friendship and make things weird. You didn’t want to lose him. That’s the main reason why you never told him your feelings in the first place. So as quickly and quietly as you could, you redressed and exited the apartment you frequently visited.

Within 15 minutes you were inside your apartment. With a long sigh you dropped your bag to the floor and kicked off your shoes. You flopped down face first onto the couch, not noticing your roommate Tatum sitting in the kitchen with a cup of coffee. Your distress must’ve been obvious because it took only a few seconds for her to realize something was wrong.

“Good morning sweet pea.” Tatum greets you cheerfully as always.

You grunt in response, waving in what you hoped was her direction. It was hard to tell with your face buried in leather.

“Everything okay?” She asks carefully and you don’t answer for a few moments because you aren’t exactly sure how to answer that.

How did you feel right now? You slowly correct your positioning on the couch and look over at Tatum. She gives you a reassuring smile and you wish it made you feel better, but it didn’t.

“Tatum...I fucked up.” You sigh and let your head fall back and rest on the cushion behind you.

“What’s wrong?” She asks as she makes her way over to the couch. She sets down her cup of coffee and gives you her full attention.

This is why you loved Tatum. You come home at 7:45 am on a Friday and she’s awake, bright eyed and bushy tailed and ready to help you in any way she could.

“...I fucked Hobi.” You state quietly, admitting it only made your heart sink more.

“I’m...what’s the problem with that? You’ve wanted to jump his bones for like two years now.” Tatum raised a brow as she replied.

“Well first off, we were both drunk off our asses and secondly I can’t even fucking remember it!”

The irritation was mostly due to the fact that your memory was shot. The one time you actually fuck your best friend and your brain couldn’t do its one job and store it away for you to get off to later? Life was a cruel son of a bitch.

“Ohhh,” Tatum nods in understanding, “I gotcha. I’m guessing he didn’t take it well?”

“I don’t even know if he knows. I left before he woke up.” You murmur as you pinch the bridge of your nose.

“What? You creeped out on him?” Tatum’s jaw drops in shock.

“What else was I supposed to do? Stay and let him wake up and see me and freak out?” You ask as you look at your roommate as if she lost her mind.

Tatum didn’t understand how detrimental this was to your friendship with Hoseok.

“Maybe he wouldn’t have reacted badly? You don’t know that.” She replies, trying to keep a positive approach, but in your eyes nothing good can come from this.

“Trust me, I know him. He would’ve freaked out. I’m not just some girl he may see around campus again. I’m his best friend, who he tries to see at least six times a week if he isn’t stuck in rehearsals. Even then I still see him every other day.”

You two met years ago through a mutual friend and had been inseparable since. When you didn’t have a date to homecoming, he ditched his friends to get cheap take out with you and go stargazing. When his long-distance girlfriend cheated on him, you stopped working on your thesis to comfort him and watch movies. When you broke your wrist, he went to your classes to take notes for you despite him having classes of his own. There were hundreds upon hundreds of memories you had with Hoseok and the thought of losing that over a drunken hookup made you want to cry.

“Okay, okay. It’s going to be okay. You said you don’t remember the hookup right? Chances are he won’t either and you can pretend it never happened.” Tatum suggests, but you can tell by the look on her face she didn’t think it was the right thing to do.

“Yeah...yeah, maybe.” You nod slowly and take a deep breath, “I need to shower, I feel gross.”

“Okay, I made you a bagel. It’s on the counter.” Tatum nods to the plate across the room and you follow her gaze to it.

“Thanks, Tate.” You say before heading to the bathroom.

You closed the door behind you and looked at yourself in the mirror. You looked about as great as you felt. You shed off your clothes and for the first time you see the full extent of the marks Hoseok left on you. There were quite a few hickeys and some small marks that could’ve been made by his hands. You wonder for a moment if you left any marks on him. You didn’t really ogle him for long before leaving so you couldn’t be sure. You stop your train of thought before you reached dangerous territory. Instead you turned on the shower and get in, determined to wash the feelings and this morning away and put it behind you.

Now dressed in comfy clothes, you lay in your bed watching some YouTube videos. You had no classes on Friday so your plans for today were to relax and deal with a slight hangover. You were deep in a clickhole, watching whatever video in your recommended caught your eye with no idea how much time had passed. Then a text from Hoseok popped up on your screen. The unexpected message made your body tense, allowing your phone to slip from your hands and land on your face. You cup your nose and groan as you flip over onto your stomach.

“At least no one saw that.” You murmur to yourself before you pick your phone up and go to your home screen.

The little number one near the message icon was taunting. The possibilities of what he could have sent you makes you hesitate to open the message, but it was now or never. You had to face it at some point. With bated breath, you opened the message.

[Hobi: The world is spinning and I hate everything.]

You chuckle as you write back a response.

[You: I told you the keg stand was a bad idea! You brought it on yourself]

[Hobi: I did a keg stand? Why don’t I remember that?]

He couldn’t remember the keg stand? That happened way before you got too drunk to remember anything. Maybe he didn’t remember going home with anyone. You’d never tell him, he won’t know, everyone wins!

[You: Because you decided to do it after 3 games of Beer Pong, you lost all three by the way]

[Hobi: That’s because my partner in crime wasn’t there to help me :( You’re my good luck charm]

You curse yourself for the way your heart flutters at that message.

[You: I told you I wasn’t trying to get too trashed! But then we played Never Have I Ever and that went to shit]

[Hobi: Ah yeah. You’ve done a lot of shit dude. I don’t know how either of us got home in one piece]

[You: Me either, I don’t remember shit after Wendy streaked through the house. Memory goes blank after that.]

[Hobi: Wait, Wendy Ryther? She streaked? And I don’t remember it? Fuckkkkkkkkk]

You laugh to yourself as you picture Hobi’s disappointed pout in your head.

[You: Your fault for getting wasted so early in the night!]

[Hobi: Well now that’s two girls I have no recollection of from the night. Great.]

Your throat goes dry and the panic from this morning comes back. Two girls? So he did remember it? You type out and erase six different messages before finally settling on one that seemed normal and not panicky.

[You: Two girls? What do you mean?]

The typing bubble pops up and you anxiously watch it and wait for Hoseok’s reply.

[Hobi: There was a girl at this party that I really vibed with. I’m pretty sure I brought her back here but she snuck out before I woke up and I can’t remember her face for shit. Don’t remember her name either. I remember getting us drinks, I remember us walking back to my place but it’s all very hazy. I was hoping she left a note with her number or something but nothing at all, just up and vanished :(]

You let out a sigh of relief. So he remembered taking someone home but he didn’t know it was you. Good. He’d let it go and this will be thing of the past before you know it.

[You: Sorry Hobi :( there’s always another party and there’s no shortage of girls on campus so]

[Hobi: Yeah you’re right but...idk I feel as if I really digged her you know? Like I wanted to get to know her better]

You smile sadly at your phone. If only he knew. He would change his mind quickly.

[You: Maybe she’s a student and she’ll be at another campus party! Have hope!]

[Hobi: Yeah you’re right! I’ll probably bump into her again, hopefully not shitfaced this time]

Your talk with Tatum comes to mind and a wave of guilt hits you hard. You consider coming clean and telling him it was you, but not knowing the outcome of doing so was enough to make you shut down that idea.

[You: Take it easy on the shots next time then. I feel bad for your liver]

[Hobi: I’m here for a good time, not a long time babe]

You roll your eyes before replying. The pet name was one he’s used with you for the past year or so. For a moment you thought maybe he was into you, but when he didn’t make any advances you realized it was only a name and nothing more.

[You: I’m tired of you]

[Hobi: Love you toooooo! Movie night? My place? No alcohol though, my stomach can’t take it right now.]

[You: Works for me! I’ll come over at like 7 or something]

[Hobi: Bring me ginger ale and I’ll love you forever]

[You: I’ll think about it.]

You perk up as you hear the front door open. Tatum was home and it was perfect timing so you can update her on your current situation.

Seven rolls around pretty fast and you find yourself back in Hobi’s apartment where you snuck out 12 hours ago. You try to push that to the back of your mind as Hoseok gives you a big hug.

“Hey! You look pretty good for someone who was plastered last night.” He says as he pulls back and takes the bag out of your hand. He leads the way into the living room and starts spreading out the food you brought over.

“I could say the same for you.” You reply as you give him a once over.

Unlike this morning, he was dressed in a shirt and sweatpants. You favored this morning’s look more than this one, but if he was shirtless right now you would be unable to focus on a movie let alone form actual coherent sentences. So it’s probably best he kept his clothes on his body and not on his lamp this time around.

“Took quite a bit of water and sporadic napping but thank you.” He flashes you a smile over his shoulder before heading to the kitchen for some napkins.

You settle on the couch and look to see what movie he chose. Scooby-Doo: The Movie. Typical Hobi. A few moments later Hoseok returns with a napkin and two cups. He pours you both some ginger ale before hitting play. You watch the opening scene in silence as you and Hoseok eat your food.

“About the party last night,” Hoseok speaks up after a few minutes, “do you remember anything from the night? Other than Wendy streaking.”

“You sound so bitter about that.” You say with an amused smirk.

“Doesn’t answer my question.” He mumbles as he stabs into the chicken on his plate.

“I remember everything up until Wendy, I told you that.” You remind him before sipping your ginger ale.

“So you don’t remember the girl I took home?” You tried to keep a casual look as you set your cup down beside you.

“Nothing, sorry Hobi.”

The look of slight disappointment made the guilt come back again, but soon it was replaced with the trademark ‘I-got-an-idea’ look.

“I know how to find her.” Hoseok says as confident as ever and you raise a brow.

What could he have come up with that made him so sure of himself?

“And how is that?”

Hoseok sets his food aside before revealing his ‘foolproof’ idea to you.

“By going to another campus party and finding her. I bet she would go to another party and you know me better than anyone else so if we work together, we could find her! Maybe. It’s worth a shot.”

“I don’t know Hobi.” You set your plate down as you shake your head.

“Come on! Pleaseeeee.” He clasps his hands together and gives you his puppy eyes.

“Really? You think that’s gonna work on me? Seriously?” You deadpan as you look your best friend in the eye.

He doesn’t reply, just keeps giving you that look and as Hoseok predicted, you caved and agreed to go with him to the party he planned to attend tomorrow. This was the start of something bad and you knew it, but you felt powerless when it came to trying to stop it.

“Please tell me you’re joking.” Tatum says as you put on your shoes.

You told her about Hoseok’s plan and how you agreed to it. He would be here in a few minutes to take you to his first ‘scouting party’.

“You are seriously feeding into the mystery girl shenanigans? You’re digging yourself into a hole you won’t be able to get out of.” Tatum continues as she watches you put on a jacket.

“I’ve been thinking about it! I’ve come to the conclusion that if I simply entertain the idea a bit, soon he’ll give up and then we can forget about this whole thing. 3 parties max and he’ll be over it. Trust me, I know Hobi very well.” You ramble as you zip up.

Tatum gave you a disapproving look but before she can say much else you yell bye and leave the apartment. You exit your building and are greeted by Hoseok sitting on the hood of a car. He smiles as you emerge and whistles.

“Lookin’ good! Don’t make me have to play bodyguard all night.” He jests as he hops down and makes his way to you.

“You’re just flattering me.” You giggle before leading the way to Lehman Tower, where the party was located.

“I always mean what I say. You trying to take someone home tonight?”

“God no. I don’t need a repeat of last night.” You sigh and put your hands in your pockets.

“Last night? You went home with someone Thursday?”

It was then you realized your error. Thinking quickly, you brush off his question.

“Nothing remarkable, ‘s why I didn’t mention it.”

Hoseok hums in acknowledgment before turning his attention back to the street ahead. Thankfully Lehman wasn’t too far away and after another minute or two of silence you reach the building.

“Hope this ends up being a good night for both of us.” Hoseok murmurs as he holds the door open for you.

It was really quiet and for a second you wonder if you came to the right place, but Hoseok leads you to the elevator and gets in before you can question anything. He clicks the P button and you wait silently as the elevator went up over 20 floors. As the elevator came to a halt, you could hear the loud music and people yelling. Once the doors open you see people lined up in the hallways with drinks, laughing and chatting in groups. With a few ‘excuse me’s you and Hoseok make your way through and enter the penthouse the party was in. This place was really posh for a college party, some rich kid probably organized it. How Hoseok got you two in was beyond you but as he handed you your first drink you found yourself not caring. Three drinks later you and Hoseok lean on a wall, lightly bouncing to the beat of the music.

“Alright, I got enough drinks in me to approach someone. Pick a girl.” He says loudly so you can hear him over the music.

“What? Pick a girl?” You repeat in confusion, forgetting why you two were here in the first place.

“My mystery girl! You know me well, I trust your judgment. Who do you think it could be?” He asks before setting his empty cup aside.

You look around the room and spotted at least 3 girls who seemed to be his type right off the bat. Cute, bubbly, slim figures, basically perfect. You’d blame it on the alcohol but you’re feeling jealousy like you never have before. You keep looking around and your eyes settle on a girl in your psychology class. She was prissy, whines a lot, super high maintenance and a pretty big bitch. The kind of girl that would roll her eyes when she bumps into you. The kind of girl Hoseok wouldn’t ever be with in a million years. Against your better judgment, you nod toward her.

“Her.” You nod to your classmate who you are 78% sure is named Cali. She was currently on her phone and ignoring everything around her.  

“Her? You sure?”  Hoseok asks as he looks her over. You could see the slight hesitancy in his eyes, but you weren’t gonna stop now.

“Yeah her, go get her.” You nudge Hoseok toward her and he gives you one last look before he shrugs and heads over.

You shouldn’t feel joy when you notice Cali ignore Hoseok's first hello or when she rolls her eyes and pretends locking her phone to talk to Hoseok is the most grueling thing in the world, but you do. You smirk a little into your cup as with each word Hoseok’s distaste for her becomes clearer in his face. He couldn’t hide his emotions well when he was drunk.

Your source of entertainment was suddenly blocked by a black t-shirt. That black t-shirt belongs to a very cute boy who was currently smiling down at you. You had a sassy remark ready to go but the sight of his warm brown eyes and dimples made your words die in your throat.

“Enjoying the party?” He asks before sipping his drink.

His voice was smooth and sweet like honey and you found yourself hanging off his every word in a slight daze.

“Yeah, it’s pretty good. You?” You manage to keep a steady tone as you look him up and down.

As expected, he was put together and trying to impress if the brands he was wearing indicated anything. He was the definition of eye candy and you find yourself trying to recall if Tatum had any plans to leave your apartment tonight. Maybe getting laid by someone other than Hoseok was the beginning of moving on.

“Good. Even better now. I’m Damien. What’s your name?”

“Get me another drink and I may tell you.” You hold the empty cup toward your new interest and he raised a brow before an amused smirk graced his features.

“You got it.”

Damien disappears to the kitchen and you glance back at Hoseok to see him looking bored. It seems Cali was giving her full attention and rambling about something, probably herself.

“Here you go.” Damien reappears at your side, holding out a red cup.

You jump a little, not expecting his return so soon. You sip from the cup and hum in delight at his choice. Not bad.

“Now, about that name?” He asks again, leaning a bit closer to you.

You chuckle softly, licking your lips before looking over at Damien again. You were going to give him your name, but instead a light squeak comes out as an arm snakes around your waist. You looked to your right to see Hoseok had at some point left Cali and joined you.

“We should head out babe.” He speaks to you but his eyes don’t leave Damien, giving the stranger a challenging look. As if he dared Damien to try and do something about him joining the conversation.

Damien returns Hoseok’s stare for a few seconds before he holds his hands up in surrender.

“I hear you man.” He addresses Hoseok before sending you a wink, “Have a good night beautiful.”

You watch Damien go before turning to your best friend.

“Cockblock much?”

“I’m hungry and annoyed, sue me.” Hoseok grumbles a bit as he takes your wrist and starts leading you out of the party.

When you both get into the elevators to begin your descent, you think about how you set up your best friend with a girl you knew he wouldn’t like. Morally it was wrong but maybe, just maybe, if you kept up this tactic for a bit he would give up. Yeah, this is necessary. This totally isn’t selfish in any way. At least that’s what your drunk mind told yourself so you wouldn’t feel guilty. By the time you came out of your head, you were back in front of your place. That was fast.

“Goodnight Hobiiiii,” You hug him tightly and inhale deeply, he always wore such nice cologne.

“Night y/n. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He says as he returns the hug and watches you head inside. Once you disappear on the elevator, he leaves and heads home. You hum softly as you kick off your shoes and enter your apartment. That wasn’t so bad. One or two more failed parties and Hoseok will give up this search and things can return to normal.

Or so you thought.

2 weeks have passed and you’ve been to 3 more parties with Hoseok in search of his mystery girl who was much closer than he knew. It would’ve been four but tonight you had to turn Hoseok down in favor of doing a project you waited way too long to start. You decide to take a break and go into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. Tatum was also in the kitchen, sitting and reading at the table. Her brown hair was up in a bun and she wore a t-shirt and shorts. She gives you a small smile and you wave at her.

“Leisure reading?” You ask as you gesture to the book.

“Nope. Required for class. Fun.” She says sarcastically as she marks the page and closes the book, “What about you?”

“Project for science. Fun.” You reply just as sarcastically as her, making Tatum laugh.

“How are things going with Hoseok? You’ve been partying a bit lately.” She asks as she turns herself to face you.

You take a moment to answer, there was no positive way to say what you were doing to Hobi despite the fact you felt it was what had to be done.

“Yeah...he’s still looking but I’m thinking he’ll give up soon! One more party.”

Tatum stares at you for a while before scoffing and shaking her head.

“Seriously? You’re still leading him on this wild goose chase when you know you won’t come clean in the end?”

Tatum’s tone made the guilt you were ignoring come back full force.

“I...It’s for the best.” You reply softly as you look away at the clock on the wall.

“You say that but it isn’t true! You claim to want to protect him and your friendship but you’re hurting him. You’re giving him hope just to crush him. You’re leading him on. There’s no nice way to put it. You’re being a selfish bitch. Why can’t you see that?”

You take a step back, not expecting this sort of reaction from Tatum. She was typically calm and patient, never raising her tone. However, what she said was right. You were being selfish, you were being a bitch, you were hurting your very best friend. The one who has done nothing but be the most supportive person he could be for you. You felt disgusted that you had let this go on for so long.

“I never meant for it to be like this.” You say softly after a minute of silence.

“I know, I know. But you need to face this now or get him over his mystery girl. You can’t let this continue.” Tatum walks over and puts an arm around you.

You couldn’t avoid it, as much as you wanted to. You had to tell Hoseok the truth.

“I won’t.” You say surely as you take out your phone and send a text to Hoseok.

[You: Can we meet at Ed’s tomorrow? I need to tell you something.]

“It’s going to be okay. I promise.” Tatum reassures you as she rubs your arm.

You sigh and nod before returning to your room. Hopefully Tatum was right.

You wake up the next morning and check your notifications. A few from Tumblr and some from random apps you don’t remember giving notification permission to. Nothing from Hoseok. You frown at that, drunk or not Hoseok has never ignored a text from you before. So you send another.

[You: ???? Earth to Hobi???]

You set the phone aside and go do your morning bathroom routine to keep you busy while you wait for a reply. Once you felt more refreshed and awake, you checked your phone and saw a reply.

[Hobi: Sorry, got caught up in something! 2 PM at Ed’s?]

Something still felt off to you about his lack of response last night but you brushed it off and replied like normal.

[You: Perfect! See you then :)]

You glance at the time and see its only 10:47 am. You had quite a bit of time, so you get a head start on one of your essays before heading over to Ed’s when the time came. You sat at the back booth which was basically you and Hobi’s official space. Your heart was pounding as it neared 2 pm. This was it. You were going to tell him the secret you tried to avoid for weeks. You consider texting him and calling it off, saying something came up and you’d meet up later. But then Hoseok enters the diner and you know you have to go through with this. He was smiling brightly as he slid into the booth across from you.

“Hey!” He chimes happily.

You eye him for a second. Something was definitely up. Hoseok was a naturally upbeat person but he was at levels of cheer that meant something good happened to him. Considering he went to a party last night, the amount of energy he had was suspicious. You’ve seen hungover Hobi more times than you can count and he closely resembled a disgruntled zombie who would rather drop dead again than be awake. However, currently he was drumming his fingers on the table and bopping his head to an imaginary beat as he looked over the menu.

“You alright Hobi?” You ask as you push your menu aside.

You usually got the same thing every time you come for breakfast so there was no need to look.

“I’m great! Better than ever. Why?” He questions as he glances up at you.

You squint at him a little and he laughs.

“Okay okay, you got me. I have something to tell you as well.” He admits as he bounces a little in his seat.

“Oh?” You say in shock.

Well this was sudden, but he looked like he may implode if you don’t let him tell you what it is immediately.

“Well out with it then. You can go first.” You state as you rest your elbows on the table.

Hoseok broke out into a wide grin as he leans forward a bit.

“You ready?” He asks in a hushed, excited tone.

“Born ready. Lay it on me.” You reply, mirroring him and leaning forward on your arms.

“I found mystery girl last night. At the party! After 5 parties, I found her and I will forever be annoyed that my brain allowed me to forget her because she is great.” Hoseok rambles with bright eyes.

He went on to tell you her name, year, major and more but it fell on deaf ears because you were in disbelief. He...found her? But mystery girl was you! You wanted to scream the confession at him, to let the secret spill and be free of this weight you’ve been feeling for weeks but that weight has increased tenfold and you were crushed. It felt like a kick to the gut, like someone poured a bucket of freezing cold water on you. You lost your chance to come clean and though you spent the past few weeks wanting anything but to come clean, having that opportunity ripped from you was very upsetting. It took Hoseok waving his hand in front of your face for you to come out of your head.

“You still with me babe?” He asks.

The pet name that once made your heart warm now made your heart ache.

“Y-Yeah, sorry I was just...just thinking.” You say as you lean back on the cushion behind you. Your eyes stayed on the table, unable to bring yourself to look at your best friend right now.

“You sure? You look a bit…” Hoseok trailed off as he tried to find the right word to use but you cut him off before he could finish his sentence.

“Feeling sick is all. I’m fine.” You make yourself meet his gaze and give him a forced smile.

“Well I rambled enough about Seoyun, what did you want to tell me?”

You could tell him right now. You could let him know that he slept with you and you were who he was looking for, but he looked so genuinely happy. In his mind, he accomplished a daunting mission he’s been working on for weeks. You couldn’t find it in yourself to ruin that for him.

“Hello, welcome to Ed’s! I’m Taylor and I’ll be your waitress today. Can I start you guys off with something to drink?” The waitress cuts into the conversation and you thank the heavens for her sudden arrival. You couldn’t think of anything to replace what you were going to originally tell Hoseok. While he told his order to the waitress, you sent a quick text to Tatum.

[You: SOS! Need you to get me out of something NOW, urgent! Please!!]

You lock your phone right before Taylor turns to you for your order. You tell it to her and periodically glance at your phone. If there was any time for Tatum to come through for you, it would be now.

“I’ll be back with your drinks.” Taylor says before walking off.

Your gaze moves to Hoseok who is giving you an expectant look. He opens his mouth but is cut off by your ringtone. You check the ID and see it’s Tatum. You answer quickly.

“Hello?”

You didn’t expect Tatum to be full-blown crying into the phone. You flinch and move your ear away from the phone a bit.

“C-Can you come home? I-I need you.” Tatum stammers before crying again.

You look at Hoseok who looks surprised. You understood why she was being loud now, she wanted him to hear.

“Yes, of course, I’ll be home in 10!” You say as you stand up and hang up. Hoseok gives you a sympathetic look.

“No worries. Go help her.” He says with a warm smile.

You give him a small smile back before making your way out of the diner. The smile was gone the moment you were outside in the cool afternoon air. Being alone gave you time to think about what just happened. Hoseok, your best friend and crush, is seeing someone he thinks is basically his soulmate. He was happy and coming clean wasn’t an option anymore. You played a dangerous game and lost.

You entered your apartment and the click of your front door shutting was the signal to your mind that you were in a safe space and could unleash the emotions welled up inside of you. You cover your mouth, trying to muffle a sob as tears came to your eyes and spilled down your cheeks. It was a useless action because regardless of your hand, your sobs echoed through the living room. You had no control over the sounds you let out or how hard you were crying. You slide down the front door and sit on the floor, not wanting to do anything but cry over the loss you felt. You didn’t notice Tatum approaching until she was on the floor next to you and giving you a hug.

“Honey,” Tatum says sadly as she rubs your back.

You felt bad for getting her shirt wet with your tears but you couldn’t help it.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She continues carefully, not wanting to make things worse for you.

You take a deep breath and try to control your crying enough to speak.

“He...the party he went to last night. He found a girl. Think she’s the mystery girl. I lost my shot Tatum. I fucked up. I’m so fucking stupid.” You speak softly into her shoulder before pulling back to look at her.

“But I guess it’s what I deserve, right? For leading him on, for being selfish and childish about the whole situation. He deserves better than someone like me. He always has.” You continue, that gnawing feeling of self-loathing coming over you.

“None of that. You’re an amazing girl even if you make some bad choices.” Tatum says sternly as she looks at you. “Hoseok would be blessed to have a girl like you.”

“Well now he can’t because he’s found someone. A dream girl. I can’t compete with that.” You sigh as you drop your head into your hands.

“I’m so sorry. I know this is cliche but it gets easier with time.” Tatum pulls you into another embrace and you let her. The comfort felt nice, but it didn’t take away the pain you felt.

“How about we binge watch some of your favorite shows and eat some ice cream? My treat.” Tatum singsongs, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

You chuckle a little, appreciating her attempt. You lift your head and look at her as you sniffle.

“I’d like that.”

Tatum helped you stand up and make your way to the couch. She stayed true to her word and bought huge cartons of ice cream to eat as you watched season after season of shows. Her commentary made you choke a few times from laughing so hard but you didn’t mind one bit. For a while, your mind let go of the events of the day and you stayed in this moment with Tatum.

You had two problems. Firstly, you had to see the guy you were in love with basically daily. Nothing new, you’ve been doing this for years. Secondly, said guy is with a girl he can’t shut up about for more than 5 minutes. You had no choice but to keep up your usual routine of hanging out with Hoseok. It’s been six days since he told you about Seoyun and somehow he kept finding ways to bring her into the conversation or he stops talking to you to send a text to her. Speaking of, he’s currently doing the latter for the 5th time since you met up for lunch.

“Hoseok. Seriously?” You sigh, annoyance clear in your tone.

“Huh?” He looks away from his phone though his fingers were still typing away.

“You keep breaking from your story and it’s frustrating. I’m here with you, can you put your phone away? I’m not on my phone.”

“Just one more text, she’s telling me about her day.” Hoseok whines as he frowns a bit.

“It’s 1 pm. Literally what the fuck could she have done?” You grumble as you avert your eyes to your food.

You don’t mean to be so sour when it came to the topic of Seoyun but this went past simply dating your crush. She had become a sort of wall between you and Hoseok and that pissed you off to no end. You never had to fight for his attention before and the sudden shift had made you more hostile than usual. Additionally, you had to completely scrap your project and redo it last night. The main water line pipe in your building broke so you couldn’t shower this morning and you overslept and missed your morning seminar which scored you a very passive aggressive and semi-rude email for your professor’s TA. Thankfully Tatum offered to reply for you because you weren’t too sure if you could resist writing back a similarly passive-aggressive response.

“Jeez, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.” Hoseok teases as he sends the text and locks the phone before putting it away, “Happy?”

“Honestly? No.” You reply as your open your water bottle.

“Can you blame me for wanting to talk to my mystery girl after spending weeks looking for her? Come on, I know you’ve had to have a crush before. You know the feeling of newfound interest and wanting to talk to that person all the time.”

Hoseok’s fond look only further soured your mood. You did know that feeling, it’s one you’ve had for a long time with the very man sitting across from you.

“Can you just do it while I’m not here? I’m tired of having to basically beg for your fucking attention.” You snap at him without really meaning to.

This was not your day and usually you could hold back the snarky remarks when it came to Seoyun and Hoseok but he’s been doing this for days now and you had reached your breaking point. You felt as if the world was closing in on you and it was never good to back someone into a corner. It inevitably led to lashing out.

“Beg? You don’t have to beg.” Hoseok states defensively.

“Yes! Yes, I do! I tell you a story and you miss a third of it because you were busy texting! It’s irritating. You’re pushing me aside for this girl who isn’t even the actual person you’re looking for!”

The words tumble out of you before you can think about it. You were exasperated and holding everything in was destroying you from the inside out.

“What are you even talking about?” Hoseok asks, starting to get slightly annoyed himself.

He had the nerve to be annoyed with you when he was the one treating you wrong. You open your mouth, ready to rip into him more when you remember you’re in public. You bite your lip, probably a bit too hard, to silence yourself. You had to get out of here before you said something you regret. You stand up quickly, your lunch the farthest thing from your mind as you quickly exit the cafe you were in.

“Hey!” Hoseok yells after you as he chases you down the path you were taking to exit the campus, “Get back here!”

You don’t turn around to see how close he is. You had one goal in mind: get away from him and recollect yourself. Being too on edge was going to result in a possible meltdown which is not what you need right now.

“I know you hear me!” Hoseok yells again before running to catch up to you and grabbing your arm. He spins you to face him, irritation clear on his face at how you were acting.

“Why are you so upset that I’m happy?” Hoseok asks and you can’t stop the laugh of disbelief that leaves you.

This motherfucker.

“It isn’t funny, I’m serious! I thought you of all people would be happy I found someone I have genuine interest in. You went to all those parties with me to find mystery girl and now you act like this when I have her? Why? Just tell me why.” He questions.

“Because she isn’t your fucking mystery girl you idiot! I am!” Your eyes well up with tears on their own volition as the confession finally leaves you.

The crushing pressure of the entire situation started to lessen and you were desperate for it to go away. So you kept talking.

“It was me, okay? You took me home, we had drunk sex and I woke up in bed with you and I panicked and I left before you woke up! I didn’t want to ruin our friendship over a stupid hookup that wouldn’t have happened if we weren’t drunk off our asses.” You ramble, tears running down your cheeks as you make gestures with your hands.

“So I kept quiet. I pretended I didn’t know who mystery girl was because I knew you’d be disappointed and I didn’t, I...” You pause to take a deep breath, “I’m sorry Hoseok. I know I should’ve come clean weeks ago but I was so scared.” You finish your ramble in a quiet voice.

It took some courage but after a moment of silence, you look over at him. His expression was a mix of confusion, anger, and disbelief but he didn’t say anything. The longer he was quiet, the more you regretted letting the truth out. Then realization washed over Hoseok’s face, but he still didn’t say a word. He just stared at you, his expression unchanging.

“Please...say something, anything.” You plead softly.

The lack of a reaction was making you over analyze everything, even his silence.

“I…” He starts but ultimately goes quiet again.

You knew it. This was a mistake. You needed to get out of here. You spin on your heels and run without looking back. You could hear Hoseok calling your name but you couldn’t stand to be there one second longer. You needed your safe space. You needed to go home.

The thing is, once you got into that safe space you didn’t want to leave again. You didn’t want to deal with the outside world and the shit it likes to hurl at you. So you don’t. You stay holed up in your room, only leaving to shower and get food. You email your professors saying you were feeling ill so you wouldn’t be attending class and you’d make up the work and get all the notes you missed. They were written so eloquently that your instructors probably had no idea you were in a blanket cocoon and sniffling as you wrote it. A few days have passed since you had lunch with Hoseok and he has made no attempt to contact you. You didn’t reach out to him either which left a lot of free time for reflecting on your friendship with Hoseok and the situation at hand. You take things one at a time.

First: your relationship with Hoseok. Your relationship with Hoseok was...unclear. You went on his social media to see if he had posted anything but he hasn’t posted a new tweet, Instagram post, or Snapchat story since you two saw each other last. So you had no way to gauge where his head was at. There wasn’t much you could do about that without reaching out to him.

Second: the situation at hand. Hoseok had interest in a girl, scratch that, he had an interest in you. Instead of confessing you kept it from him for almost a month, even with the knowledge that he really wanted to find the mystery girl. You encouraged his ‘mission’ for almost a month knowing he would not find what he was actually looking for. You intentionally had him talk to girls you knew he wouldn’t like because you were jealous. This small mishap festered into a huge mess and it all links to you.

You not being honest.

You being selfish.

You caused this.

Sure you were scared but it doesn’t excuse your actions and how much you may have hurt one of the sweetest boys you know. The epiphany was bittersweet. Your guilt tripled, which resulted in what was only meant to be a weekend of sulking becoming nearly a week of sulking. On the other hand, it made you realize you had quite a bit of making up to do with Hoseok. You needed to reach out first. The idea terrified you but there was no way around it. You had to handle this like a mature adult.

So you take a shower and put on fresh clothes with the intention to go to Hoseok’s apartment. You exit your room after putting in an order for pick up from your usual Chinese spot. By the time you made it there, your food should be ready to go. You peek into the living room and spot Tatum on the couch with a book like usual. She glances up and does a double take.

“Oh! Hey!” Tatum jumps up and sets her book aside, “How are you doing?” She asks as she fidgets with her hands.

You roll your eyes playfully, knowing she was holding herself back from giving you a hug. You open your arms and she smiles widely before hugging you tightly.

“I missed you. I didn’t want to bother you but I was so worried! You don’t know how happy I am to see you.” Tatum rambles into your shoulder before pulling away, her green eyes bright and joyful as she looked at you.

“I missed you too. Sorry for worrying you, I just needed time to myself.” You reply, giving her a small smile.

Tatum nods before she notices your shoes.

“You’re going out?”

“Yeah, going to Hoseok’s.”

Saying it out loud made a weird feeling settle in your stomach. Who knew how this could end? That was the exact question that landed you in this situation in the first place, so you disregard it. It doesn’t matter, you had to try. If he turned you away then you’d have to accept it and move on.

“Oh?” Tatum’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise. “Well, don’t let me keep you any longer. Good luck.” “Thanks Tate.” You wave at her before heading out of the door.

You put your headphones in as you enter the elevator and put your music on shuffle. You focused on the lyrics instead of letting your brain wander to what you were doing. The last thing you needed was to talk yourself out of this. Thirty minutes later you found yourself in front of Hoseok's apartment building, takeout bag in hand and heart thumping. You pause your music and put your headphones away. Then a thought crosses your mind.

What if he wasn’t home?

You didn’t think about that. There’s only one way to find out. You take out your phone and open your messages. You start writing ‘Hello’ but then make a face and erase it, way too formal. Maybe just a hi? No, that felt too short and awkward. ‘Hey Hoseok!’ No, the exclamation mark made things too cheery. ‘Hoseok’ also felt weird, but you can’t really call someone a nickname when you aren’t talking, right? You groan at the sky. Why was this so damn difficult? It’s just a text message for christ sake.

“y/n?”

You spun around to see the very man you were just thinking about. Hoseok stood before you in a muscle tee and black jeans with holes in the knees. The duffel bag on his arm meant he was either coming from a rehearsal or from the gym. It felt good to see him in person and not on your phone screen. You scrolled through your gallery looking at old photos of you two more than you’d like to admit.

“Hey Hobi.” You inwardly pat yourself on your back for managing to not stammer or stutter, “How are you?”

Hoseok shifted his weight between his feet before responding.

“I’m okay. You?”

“I’m,” You pause for a moment.

The word ‘fine’ was on your tongue but things weren’t fine. You had come here so things could become fine.

“I’m not too good. Missing my best friend.” You lift the bag of takeout, “Was hoping he’d be up for some takeout and reconciliation.”

The slight hopefulness in your tone made you feel a little pathetic. You didn’t want to seem weak but pride wasn’t going to help you right now. Hoseok’s eyes soften and he nods before he leads you inside. You follow behind and ride up with Hoseok to his apartment. He lets you in and it felt a bit foreign to be here again. You slowly walk in and sit on the couch after taking off your shoes.

“I’m going to shower, I’ll be back.” Hoseok calls back to you before he goes into his room. You take the time to take the food containers out of the bag and set up for his return. That doesn’t take too long and soon you’re left with your thoughts again. He didn’t seem upset about you being here so that was a plus. It gave you some hope that this could end positively. How could you ease into the topic? It seemed pointless to beat around the bush, so maybe just jumping into the apology headfirst would be best? You were too deep in your mind to notice Hoseok had re-entered the room and was asking you what you wanted to drink. When he called your name for the 3rd time, you finally heard him.

“Huh?” You turn your head to Hoseok who seemed a bit amused at your zoning out.

“What do you want to drink?” He asks again.

“Anything nonalcoholic is fine.”

He nods and disappears into the kitchen. He comes out a moment later with two bottles of water. He hands you one before sitting next to you. You watch him pick up chopsticks and the container of noodles. He wastes no time in opening it up and filling his mouth. You bite back a smile. Goddamn he was adorable, even now he made your chest tighten. He glances up at you and notices you watching him.

“Wha?” He asks as he chews.

“You know I hate when you talk with your mouth full!” You groan and make a face.

“I know.” He says as a smug grin spreads across his features.

You laugh and shake your head. He was still your Hobi. Even after the days of silence. Even after all the bullshit you pulled. He welcomed you with open arms and a friendly smile. You don’t know what you did to deserve him. Maybe you didn’t.

“I’m sorry. I am so sorry. I was such an idiot and handled everything childishly. Drunk hookups happen and I should have come to you and talked to you about it the morning after. I was scared of what would happen to us but it doesn’t excuse what I did to you. Leading you on like that. Feeding you lies basically. It was unfair of me and I shouldn’t have done that. I hope you and Seoyun are happy and doing well because I bet she’s amazing if you felt so connected with her that she seemed to be your mystery girl. I hope that we can still be friends because I miss you. I never realized how much of my day revolves around you until I lost you.”

You stare at your hands as you speak. It was easier to be vulnerable and honest when you didn’t have to look into the eyes you’ve slowly fallen in love with over the years. You waited for a response, but for a long while there was only silence.

“Hoseok. I can’t do this again. I can’t take the silence. Please, I need something.” You say desperately as you lifted your gaze to him.

He set aside the food and has that unreadable expression on his face again.

“You’re right. It was unfair. You really toyed with me and at first I was upset because I thought you were just trying to make me mad, but when I realized it was true I was more hurt than anything else. You really think I’d toss you aside like that?” He asks softly.

This was a side of Hoseok he rarely let show. He was the sunshine, the happy one, he always tried to assume that role even when he was going through hell. He didn’t like anyone seeing him in an emotional state, but he learned to trust you with it.

“No! Yes? I don’t know. I was scared you’d regret it and be upset that you let yourself sleep with me.” You sigh and drop your head into one of your hands.

“You’re one of my absolute best friends. It would take a lot to break that. A lot.” He emphasizes before he chews his lip, “And about Seoyun, we aren’t a thing anymore.”

Your head snaps up at that.

“What?”

“Yeah. Finding out she wasn’t the girl I was looking for kind of changed my outlook. She’s a great girl but…” He trails off and messes with a thread on his shirt, “I kept thinking of you. It wasn’t fair to her, so I told her we should stop whatever it was we had.”

“Oh.”

You were stunned. He really called things off with her? He was basically praising the ground she walked on a few days ago.

“Yeah.”

There’s silence for a few more moments before Hoseok speaks up.

“Do you regret it? What we did that night?”

You think about it for a second before responding.

“Yes and no. I don’t regret what we did but I hate the circumstances it happened under. Do you regret it?”

Hoseok shakes his head no, “I wish we were sober but that’s it.”

“You’d fuck me sober?”

“I’d fuck you, period.” He replies without missing a beat and you both burst into laughter.

“Sorry, sorry, too blunt.” Hoseok says between chuckles.

“No! No, no, honest is what we need! Dishonesty is what got us here in the first place.” You reassure him as you calm down your giggles.

“Honesty.” He repeats, chewing his lip in thought before he nods, “Alright. I have a question for you.”

“Go for it.” You reply smoothly though you felt as if your heart was trying to escape your body through your throat.

Hoseok pauses to ponder something before asking his question.

“If we did do...this,” He motions between the two of you, “again. Would it be for fun? Or would there be something else?”

“Elaborate, please.”

You weren’t stupid, you had an idea of what he meant but you wanted to be 100% sure you were on the same age.

Hoseok sighs softly and pinches the bridge of his nose. Was he...nervous? That’s rare.

“Emotions. Feelings. Things like that.” His eyes were trained on the wall beside you as he spoke in a soft tone.

“Between us?”

“Yes, y/n. Do you want to just fuck me for fun or do you want this to be something exclusive?” He replies bluntly, tired of trying to ease into this line of questioning.

“Oh! Well,” You trail off as you fidget with the plastic fork in your hand.

He was giving you a chance to be completely open with him. Now was a good a time as any.

“Exclusive. With feelings. I’ve had feelings for you for a while.”

Hoseok looks at you when you say that, his warm smile starting to tug at his lips.

“It makes sense why I felt so connected to ‘mystery girl’ now. I’ve wanted her for a while. Just never thought I’d get her.”

“Well you were wrong, very wrong.” You inform him, tossing the fork onto the table in front of you.

“Could’ve had her sooner if she had been honest with me from the jump.”

You know he was just teasing but it still didn’t stop you from feeling guilty again.

“Hey,” Hoseok calls to you softly before putting two fingers under your chin to turn your head to him, “It’s okay. We’re okay.” He reassures you as he looks into your eyes and just like that, the guilt melts away.

You smile at him, heart beating a mile a minute as his hand moves to cup your cheek. He studies you for a moment, the air between you becoming more tense with each passing second.

“Can I kiss you?” His voice is so quiet, you almost miss his question.

“Can you kiss me? Not like I’ve been wanting this for years or anything.” You say sarcastically as Hoseok rolls his eyes at you.

“I’m trying to be a gentleman and you’re cracking jokes right now?”

Though his tone would make you think he was annoyed, his amused eyes gave him away. You’re ready to give him another sarcastic remark but then his lips are on yours and all words leave your mind as you melt into the kiss. Your lips develop a rhythm with his and without much thought your hands run up his chest. A soft growl emits from Hoseok’s chest as his free hand moves to your waist. You fist his shirt in your hand and pull until he’s hovering over you on the couch. Hoseok adjusts so the hand that was on your cheek is now holding him up, his other hand starts roaming from your waist. You spread your legs to give him more room to settle and are taken out of the moment by a loud thud. You both break away and look over to see what had happened. While you were adjusting, your foot knocked Hoseok’s food onto the floor.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry.” You ramble, slightly embarrassed as you look at the mess you made.

“It’s fine I have something else to eat right here anyway.” He says dismissively as he goes back to kissing you.

It takes you a moment to catch on to his suggestive tone, but when you do you hit his arm.

“Jung Hoseok!” You playfully scold him as heat flooded your cheeks.

“What?” He asks with faux innocence before bursting into laughter at the look on your face.

“You’re a pervert.”

“You’ll come to like it babe.” He whispers softly into your ear before trailing kisses from behind your ear to your collarbone.

As you tilted your head back to give him more space, you found yourself agreeing with that statement. You were already loving it.

“Depends if you can put your money where your mouth is.” You challenge, knowing how Hoseok wasn’t one to back down.

You felt him smile against your neck and next thing you knew Hoseok was picking you up and carrying you toward his room.

“Hey! I still have food to eat!” You whine as you watch your takeout container get further away from you.

“It’ll still be here when I’m finished with you.” He says as he kicks open his door, “You just may not be able to reach it on your own.”

With a promise like that, how could you turn him down? Food be damned, you’d return for it later. Right now you had years of pining to make up for and you had a feeling Hoseok would make sure you both remember it this time.