#like fuck this series made my childhood and now i'm turning 24

[aseikh]

Hey! Saw your latest post. Man, I used to run gilan-davidsson back in the day, and being part of the RA fandom like 10 years ago is such an integral part of why I think tumblr is great and why I’m still here. I’m so glad I still follow you and see you post, it’s like a little reminder of being in high school and having fun interacting with strangers online over something so special.

oh my GOD DUUUUUDE gilan-davidsson was THE blog back then, it's so good to hear you are still around. i honestly think nostalgia is why i keep this blog around, but i've also met so many wonderful people through RA and i wouldn't be who i am today without them.

it's always been a treat to be able to come back here and see that other people still have the party going, even if i'm not on this blog every day anymore.

[cathrrrine]

The Other Romanoff

Y/N Romanoff finds herself in a strange predicament when she lands in a universe drastically different to her own. The Avengers are basically non-existent in the present day, Yelena is nowhere to be found, her sister is dead and...all traces of her existence is gone.

Can she survive in a world where her identity means nothing? Or will she fade away before she even has a chance to find out how to solve it?

0 - TIME GOES BY

———

You stared at the headstone below you, touching the cold, chiseled stone with the tip of my fingers with great caution. Your eyes had scanned the name engraved on it thousands of times already at this point, but your brain hadn't quite caught up yet.

Natasha Romanoff. Daughter. Sister. Avenger.

Even though it was literally set in stone, you couldn't bring yourself to believe it. You had just talked to her on the phone three days ago, or at least that was the case in your world. This world was different. It wasn't the one you hated and loved at the same time, it was a whole other universe entirely.

You woke up 24 hours ago with an incredible ache in your bones and a migraine that felt like a grenade went off in your head. When you opened your eyes, you were in a different room—although, room wasn't exactly the word to define it. It was a warehouse, with high ceilings and mysteriously stained walls. It took half an hour for you to figure out how to exit the building, especially in the lack of light, and when you finally made it outside, you were greeted by a vast parking lot with no signs of civilisation whatsoever.

It took another five hours of walking to the nearest occupied building, a gas station that you nearly mistook for an abandoned lot. You borrowed the man behind the counter's phone in exchange for five dollars—all the cash you had in my pocket, thankfully American currency stayed the same—and dialled every single number you knew by heart. Natasha, Yelena, Tony, hell, even Clint.

Unsurprisingly, not one of them were in service. So, you went out from behind and hot-wired one of the two trucks parked there, the phone you 'borrowed' still in your pocket.

Now here you were, somewhere in Ohio, after googling for what seemed like forever in search of your sister after finding nothing you knew worked. The first search result that came up was Ohio, next to the words 'the late Natasha Romanoff'. You felt like your heart had been ripped out of my chest by the Hulk. Nothing could have prepared you for that moment, not even one of Natasha's elaborate schemings and notes. At first, you thought you were being tricked, and then you thought you had accidentally swallowed an edible before going to sleep and was under some drug-induced trance. But it felt too real for it to be fake. Nothing in your head would've been able to come up with all this on it's own, even if it was one of your greatest nightmare.

You didn't even bother googling anyone else, too shocked to think of anything else. You just hit the gas and drove all the way to the location where she was supposedly buried and found her headstone just...standing there, upright. Your body went through a series of shocks just trying to get to it up close. You were expecting for her to be there maybe, laughing with Yelena, Tony and everyone else who played a part in this stupid prank. But there was nothing but the drumming of your own heartbeat pounding in your ears.

No one in their right mind would play this kind of trick on you.

You had been driving all night and had only arrived by daytime, around 7 in the morning by the looks of it. The sun felt warm against your skin, a steep contrast in comparison to the cold, dead feeling you had in your chest. You were so confused. You couldn't even begin to comprehend what was happening to you. It was like a Supernatural episode playing right before your eyes, but without the characters and the humour. Just you and your anxiety.

You knelt down so your head was somewhat level to the headstone. Your hand grazed over the familiar symbol engraved in the middle of the stone, just below her name. It was the Black Widow symbol, an emblem you had worn almost all your lives.

Ohio. It was somehow appropriate that she'd be buried here. A small smile tugged at the corners of your lips as a memory from your childhood resurfaced.

"Friend of hers?"

You jumped, jumped at the sudden sound of somebody's voice. Somehow, with all the noise in your head, this somebody managed to sneak behind you successfully without my knowing. You put your hands on your knees and lifted yourself up, turning around to face the stranger.

Who turned out to not be a stranger after all.

Your eyes widened at the sight of him. It's been such a long time since you've seen him in person that it almost felt surreal...but then again, what about all this didn't?

It was a relief to see a familiar face in a strange world. You took in his brown eyes and lopsided smile, unable to hold in a reciprocal reaction. "Sam!"

Your excitement got the better of you that you had forgotten the situation you were in. His reaction immediately changed, like you flipped a switch by yelling out his name so casually. Then the smile returned, "Sorry. I forget myself sometimes. Yes, I'm Sam, nice to meet you. What's your name?"

He held out a hand for you to shake. This time it was your turn to falter. Having one of your best friends whom you've known for half of your life ask you that question felt like taking a baseball bat to the stomach.

Sam seemed to notice the shift in your demeanour, especially since his hand had been hanging in mid-air for half a second too long.

"Are you alright?" He asked, eyebrows furrowed. He placed his hand back to his side.

You had no one else to turn to in this strange world. You wondered for a split second if you should figure it all out on your own and maybe wait and see if this was all a dream. But then if this was indeed a dream, what would the harm be in telling him, right?

As Nat would usually say in any type of situation–Fuck it.

"No, Sam. I'm most definitely not okay." You breathed out. "I'm Y/N Romanoff, and I think I might be in some deep shit."

[heroes-never-discourse]

i'm not op of that 'if you read yaoi' post but i'll take some cute bl recs anyway. i literally only just started reading manga this week and i'd love to add some more titles to my to read list

!!!!

absolutely anon, let me tell you I spent three weeks reading nothing but bl and it was Great and now I have Many recs for you

warning! this is Gonna Be Very Long so my recs’ll be under the cut (bolded ones are my favorites!)

1K Apartment no Koi

24 Jikan Eigyouchuu

After Morning Love and its spin-off Before Daylight Love

Ai ga Love Shite You nanosa(this one is as ridiculous as it is adorable, so fucking funny)

Amayadori wa Basu-tei de

Ameiro no Toge

Ameiro Paradox(this one is still ongoing; i usually hate when love interests do nothing but bicker? but the journalist boyfriends just do something right for me. and Natsume Isaku is just one of my favorite mangakas! love most of her work)

Ano Koi no Tsuzuki

Arashi no Ato

Bikkuri suru hodo Doji na Koi

Body Talk Paradox(the second and third stories are the best ones, really love the art style, it’s very crisp, and one of the side characters/one half of the secondary couple has one of the most unique designs I’ve seen in a BL)

Boku no Ano Ko

Boku to Neko to Hatsukoi Kousa

Bokura wa Sore wo Hitei Dekinai

Chiisana Koi no Melody

Chikatetsu no Inu

Colorful Line

Konbini-kun.(I love Junko’s art style it’s very very cute)

Count 0(boy can see a counter above everyone’s heads that counts the number of lies that person has told in their life and is jaded because of it, until he meets another boy whose counter reads 0, very cute)

Doukyuusei and its sequels Sotsugyousei and O.B.

Doushitemo Furetakunai and its spin-off Soredemo, Yasashii Koi o Suru(Doushitemo is top tier okay, it’s one of my absolute favorites, the romance is lowkey and sweet and they��re just so good ;~;)

Doushiyoumo Nai Keredo

Endou-kun no Kansatsu Nikki

Faraway

Gentei Kareshi

Gosan no Heart and its spin-off Owaranai Fukou ni Tsuite no Hanashi

Gunjou no Subete

Hachimitsu Darling

Hana no Mizo Shiru(very very sweet, I’m pretty sure I teared up at one point)

Hanagaya Eigyousho no Kare

Hand Which

Harapeko Usagi to Koisuru Ookami

Hare no Hi

Hatsukoi (Kakine)(very silly, there’s like four different love stories happening in this one boarding house, it’s great)

Hatsukoi (Kazuki)(so this mangaka has a huge list of Haikyuu doujins they’ve done, and I hadn’t watched Haikyuu before I read this but now that I have I can’t unsee the fact that the main characters look like Kageyama and Hinata lmfao)

Hatsukoi no Atosaki

Heart no Kakurega(the secondary couple are hit or miss but the main couple Izumi and Haru are so pure?? they’re so sweet I love them a lot)

Hibi Koikoi

Himegoto Asobi(I’m a goddamn sucker for single dad falls in love stories and this one is one of the best)

The Iberiko Buta series(this manga is so fucking funny?? the initial couple are cute and hilarious idiots, while the second couple are a bit more lowkey and bittersweet, and overall it’s such a funny cute read)

Illumination(this manga is melancholy in book form, I really love this mangakas writing style, the stories are all bittersweet and its some beautiful, beautiful angst)

Kaeru no Prince-sama

Kakugo wo Kimete

Kanemochi-kun to Binbou-kun (“I fell in love when I was sixteen”. great. thanks manga. now i’m crying.)

Kasa no Shita, Futari

Katappashi Kara Zenbu Koi

Kigurumi Planet (the premise for this one??? is so off the wall and ridiculous lmao this manga has no right to be as good as it is, the couple is very sweet and the story is actually pretty good if you can get past how fucking bonkers the premise is)

Kimi to Aruku

Kimi to Date (short and sweet! I love the art style)

Konya mo Nemurenai and its spin-off Kimi to Kore kara(college boy accidentally summons a demon who decides to stick around so he doesn’t have to go home and marry his childhood friend - I fucking love Konya so much, and the love interest Endo is legit one of my favorite characters, I usually hate assholeish semes but he just pulls it off so well; the spin-off features the secondary couple of Konya)

Kimi wa Natsu no Naka

Kiraboshi Dial

Kirakira no Hibi

Kodomo ga Neta Ato de

Koi made Hyakurin and its spin-off Akunin o Nakaseru Houhou (young heir to his grandfather’s yakuza group starts hero-worshiping an ex-yakuza florist (who now hates yakuza) and eventually they fall for each other - listen this manga was made for me, I love yakuza with a heart of gold and ex-yakuza archetypes so fucking much, i love this manga a lot and the main couple is so sweet; the spin-off features ex-yakuza’s older brother)

Koi ni mo Naranai.

Koi no Hanashi ga Shitai

Koko ni Aru, Kimi no Oto

Konya, Mister de

Kuchizuke wa Niji no Ue de (the premise for this is so cute and unique! a man who’s followed by sunny weather and a man who’s followed by stormy weather meet and decide to go mountain climbing! very cute)

Kurayami ni Strobe

Life, Love (okay listen this one! i did enjoy this one How. Ever. it’s a story where a seemingly not so smart man is made to guard the man that he and his boss kidnapped, and then they maybe??? fall in love over the course of the kidnapping and that’s the first half of the story, and the relationships are very weird and complex and the characters are also weird and complex? and it’s very unsatisfying as a romance but still somehow satisfying? except the ending which left me just shocked laughing like ‘that’s it?????’ and i’m still not sure how i feel about it but i’m pretty sure i liked it and yeah disclaimer over)

Link: Boku to Kimi no Aida

Lotus Eater

Lucky Number 13(okay no this one is so sweet and cute, a huge baseball otaku falls for a boy who is plagued with bad luck unless he’s dating someone, in which case his bad luck transfers to his partner, they’re such a pure couple and it’s a very sweet and funny story and I love it)

Mad Cinderella(this one isn’t totally scanlated :( but there’s still a lot of it scanned and it’s all very cute and worth)

Mahoutsukai no Koi

The Mainichi Seiten Series; Mainichi Seiten, Kodomo wa Tomaranai, Children’s Time, Kodomo no Iibun, Aki-chan no Iibun, Isoganaide, Hanaya no Nikai de(very very slice of life, three couples in all, the first volume is kind of slow and the art is kinda rough and the couple is very chaste but still cute and the art gets better through the series, and the other two relationships are top tier and overall this series is one of my absolute favorites)

Mayoke no Darling

Mazu wa, Hitokuchi.(okay but the premise is a farm that secretly raises flying pigs how amazing is that)

Me wo Tojite 3-Byou

Merry Checker

Motto Aishiaimasho

Nakanai Hotaru

Nee Senpai, Oshiete yo

Negative-kun to Positive-kun

Neko no Koi (I really love young masters who are in love with their less well-off childhood friend/keeper that’s some good shit)

Nennen Saisai

Nichijousahan Bi - Beautiful Life

No Color

Number Call

Okujou no Bye-Bye

Omamori Shimasu, Dokomademo

Ringo ni Hachimitsu and its sequel Kare no Barairo no Jinsei (i really love this mangakas art style and way of writing, very good)

Rutta to Kodama (listen these boys will be the death of me, I love delinquents especially delinquents with hearts of gold, and Rutta is the epitome of that, he and Kodama are so fucking sweet and I just love them so so much, one of my absolute favorites)

Saiyaku wa Boku wo Suki Sugiru(this one is still ongoing! it’s basically a soul mate au where if one half gets injured the other is the one who sustains the injury, turned into a family curse that lasts a year upon the younger one’s 17th birthday, so very very good)

Sannin Gurashi (i love this one it’s so sweet ;~;)

Sawattemo Ii kana (also not completely scanlated and I cry every day because of it)

Sayonara, Heron

Sayonara, Itoshi no My Friend

Seinen wa Ai o Kou

Sense of Love

Seven Days

Shitteru yo.

Shuuden Elegy

Signal

Soko ni Suwaru na

Sonna Me de Mitekure (this one??? is fUCKing ridiculous, I laughed through the entire thing it’s fucking ridiculous omg)

Sono Koi ni wa Wake ga Aru(love!!!! i love this one! so much! stoic but gentle semes are my fucking kryptonite okay and Azuma is that in spades, he and Aoi are just so fucking cute)

Sono Mama de

Sore wa Isshun no Hikari, dewa Naku

Sore o Koigokoro to Yobu no Nara

Sorenari ni Shinken Nan desu.(this is basically a sick fic featuring an overworked single dad and his playboy regular who’s in love with him, literally one of my absolute favorites and I think the first yaoi I ever read? Oosawa and Yoshioka are top tier and it’s just so sweet and feel-good, ugh I love)

Spotlight Lover

Star-like Words

Sugar Code(mix competent yakuza with useless gay and you get Oodoi, it’s beautiful; I love Oodoi and Akira a lot)

Suteneko no Karte

Te o Tsunai de Koi o(”oh you guys don’t get along? okay now you have to hold hands the entire walk home until you do” lmao archery club president knows what’s up)

Tear Drop

The Killer

Tight Rope(i’ve already exposed my love for yakuza and ‘young master in love with his childhood friend’ archetypes which means me loving Tight Rope was written in the fucking stars because Ryuu is b o t h, and I just really love Naoki as well)

Toki no Maigo o Sagashite!(amnesia plot!)

Tsukiatte Agete mo Ii n Dakara ne (this one is f u c k i n g ridiculous, the love interest is a giant fucking ham, it’s r i d i c u l o u s lmfao)

Twinkle (Kanda)

Wakabaryou de, Kimi to

Wakadanna ni Goyoujin

Work In

Yachin Hanbun no Ibasho desu

Yakozen

Yamada to Shounen

Yamete Kudasai,(this one gave me cavities)

Yozora no Sumikko de,

Yuki no Shita no Qualia

Yuugure no Machi

Zantei, Koibito

[sp00kymulderr]

dO THEM ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL /EVIL LAUGH (??)/ uhm from the "let's talk about" post úwù 💗 I'm sorry I'm making you write so much but i really wanna know!!! ILYSM

ANYTHING FOR YOOOU!

There is a lot here, I’m apparently feeling very chatty tonight so sorry about some of the long ramble-y answers again:

1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie.

Itwas 2005, and 15 year old me had dragged my dad and brother to thecinema to see a movie that looked really interesting to me – itfeatured several badass women in the main cast at a time when Iwasn’t seeing much with actually strong, well written femalecharacters in. So I had to see this, and it was sci-fi which my wholefamily enjoys, so off we went to watch it. At the beginning, therewas a filmed intro of Joss Whedon talking about the movie and aboutthe TV series it came from, which I knew nothing about and thatworried me. But then the film started and I swear my heart stoppedfor a moment, I fell so deeply in love with the setting, thecharacters, the cast. The film was Serenity, and it started a lot forme

2: Talk about your first kiss.

Myfirst kiss wasn’t special like I wish it had been. I was about 14and it was with my best friend at the time, a guy who I had nofeelings towards whatsoever. I regret the kiss a lot, and the kissesthat followed. I wish I hadn’t felt pressured in to it the way Idid.

3: Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for.

Idon’t really get intense feelings for people that often, especiallynot now I’m older. There was a guy when I was in secondary schoolthough, who I genuinely thought I loved (I didn’t). It was veryunrequited and took over my life for too long, and was a catalyst tothe depression I later suffered with.

4: Talk about the thing you regret most so far.

Partof me regrets going to uni, but then I think about all theexperiences I had at uni and I would never have had those, or madethose friends, or enjoyed myself that much anywhere else. I can’tthink of much that I really really regret, I tend to think thingsthrough a lot before I do them.

5: Talk about the best birthday you’ve had.

Iam the queen of good birthdays, istg! I ALWAYS go on holiday for mybirthday, have ever since I was young, so I have so many good ones.But I think it has to be between going to New York for my 21stor Berlin for my 23rd (my favourite place in the wholeworld), or this past birthday which I spent on my own in New Zealandand got to go to Hobbiton for the first time!

6: Talk about the worst birthday you’ve had.

Ihave genuinely not had a bad birthday yet. This year would’ve beensad if I hadn’t gone to Hobbiton, as I was completely on my own forthe first birthday ever.

7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.

I’ma total mess of insecurities tbh. I wouldn’t know where to start.

8: Talk about the thing you are most proud of.

In2012, when I left uni and moved to London on my own, I started a blogcalled The Theatre Tourist where I wrote about two of my biggestpassions; theatre and travel. A year after I started it, I got myfirst invite to review a theatre production which I accepted havingnever written a review. Once I wrote it, I knew this was what Iwanted to be doing, I fell completely in love with it. And to thisday I still run that blog, I have a fair few readers and connectionswith theatre PR’S all around the world. Currently I’m writing atleast a review a month for New Zealand theatre but when I was back inLondon I was being invited to at least 4 a week every week. I am soproud of that blog.

9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.

Mytattoos. They make me feel better about myself because I find thembeautiful and they mean a lot to me.

10: Talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had.

Thatbest friend I mentioned earlier. He accused me of all sorts andcaused so much stupid drama in my life. We had a massive argument inthe hallway at school once, I ended up in tears in the bathroom andwe stopped talking to each other. He was a massive fucking jerk andI’m glad he’s not in my life any more.

11: Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had.

Ihad a lot of great dreams just before I moved to New Zealand, aboutwhat a great time I was going to have out here, and they havedefinitely come true

12: Talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had.

Istress dream quite a lot, the most recent one was losing my family ina natural disaster and it was awful.

13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time.

Iwaited quite a while, so I was 18 when I lost it. It wasn’t perfectbut it was nice and with someone I liked at the time. It was, however, in a single bed which was AWFUL god. But other than that, there’s not much to talk about.

14: Talk about a vacation.

Whichone to choose though??? I love travelling and have been so lucky totravel a lot, I studied tourism and it’s always been a huge part ofmy life. That’s why I’m out here on this beautiful island in themiddle of nowhere right now.

15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.

Idon’t feel content a lot, but my first and subsequent 6 visits toBerlin have been the best I’ve ever felt in my whole life. Berlinis the one place I feel completely at home and know I belong.

16: Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to.

Idon’t go to a lot of parties! And the ones I went to when I wasyounger, I don’t remember a lot of them… I went to a really funfoam party in my first year of uni that I always remember fondly iffuzzily.

18: Talk about something that happened in elementary school.

Whichone is elementary? Primary I think? Jesus, who remembers primaryschool? I don’t think much exciting happened when I was that young!

19: Talk about something that happened in middle school.

Waitwhat’s middle school if the next question is high school? Do theyhave a school between primary and secondary in America? I’mCONFUSED

20: Talk about something that happened in high school.

Ohall sorts of shit.

21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.

Therewas this guy in college who I became pretty close friends with thenlater told me he really liked me. He was sweet but so not my type soI just said no and then he never spoke to me again lol

22: Talk about your worst fear.

Interms of an actual phobia, I’m really afraid of dogs. Which ispretty inconvenient, they make me panic.

23: Talk about a time someone turned you down.

Ugh,I got drunk at a work party and asked out a guy from IT I had beeneyeing up and he turned me down which is fair enough I was a messback then. But then I had to see him at work all the time and it wasso embarrassing for me.

24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.

Justrecently I’ve been having a crisis about what I’m going to dowith my life once I get back to the UK next year, I want to get a jobI actually love as opposed to ending up in a shitty call centre jobhating my life again. But the other day my manager told me that shegenuinely believes I can do absolutely anything and be brilliant atit, and that just boosted my confidence so much.

26: Talk about things you do when you’re sick.

Iusually try and just get on with things and don’t admit I’m sickunless it’s really bad. I hate sitting still, I need to be doingsomething all the time even when ill.

31: Talk about what you think death is like.

Scary?Death scares me, I can’t lie. I try not to think about it.

32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.

TheatreRoyal Bath, I associate so many good memories with this building.When I was a kid and first expressed an interest in Shakespeare mymum used to sometimes take me to see plays there. I started a massivething in me and it’s always a place that makes me feel happy.

33: Talk about what you do when you are sad.

Iput on music. Loud. Usually Bowie, because I know he will make mefeel better, he always does.

34: Talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured.

Ireally hope this doesn’t tempt fate, but as of yet I’ve onlyexperienced self inflicted pain. Never broken a bone or sprainedanything. Uhm so probably my first tattoo but even then that was a good pain for the most part.

35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.

Beinganxious. Seriously, if I could control my anxiety or make itdissapear things would be so different.

38: Talk about songs that remind you of certain people.

Meand my dad share a fairly similar musical taste, and he was the onewho introduced me to all the musicians I love so deeply now.Specifically listening to Delilah by The Sensational Alex Harvey Bandmakes me think of him. With my mum, we both love Alice Cooper so anytime I hear him I think of her.

39: Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier.

Iwish I’d known earlier that there’s no shame in ‘sleeping around’.I felt ashamed for a long time about my sexual habits, and got shamedfor them. I know now that it’s all bullshit and me being in controlof my sexuality is a good thing.

Ialso wish someone had told me that you’re allowed to have stops andstarts in your career, for years after uni I tried so hard to followa career path that wasn’t working for me but I thought I would be afailure if I gave up, or if I ended up doing something that didn’trelate to my degree. Even though I still struggle with the idea of acareer, I at least do know now that I am allowed to do whatever thehell I want whether I studied for it or not.

40: Talk about the end of something in your life.

In 2016 the West Endmusical Sunny Afternoon closed. By the time it closed I had seen it150 times, literally seeing it at the very least once a week for twowhole years. It changed me a lot – I became more confident, I madea group of the best friends I’ve ever had, I started a fan groupfor it and worked with the marketing team for the show on a socialmedia campaign. It was a HUGE part of my life. When the show closedit felt like the end of an era, I really didn’t know what I wasgoing to do without it. It meant so much to me. But now I have allthese great friends who still talk and hang out and I have two castsof actors whose careers I’ll be following for the rest of my life.