#like during the acting whatver but afterwards. like I’m better now I’m a private person don’t like to over share face on whatever online but | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

asexualjedi · 2 years ago

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As a kid I wanted to like be like the doctor like play them on tv but then I was likely they’ll never hire me I’m American and then I was like ok best I can get is companion but I need to like figure out how to break into acting I’m only gonna get older I’m running out of time. I need to get enough credits to ever be able to audition. Anyways long story short sometimes I’ll see the doctor or the companions and my brain just awaken that demon and is like ok we’ll time to drop out of law school change my life completely in need to hurry up and speed run if I’m not gonna run out of time.

#idk if I’m explaining it right bc I’m half wake but truly funny that’s ingrained in me just like I know how old I was at every grade bc in #elementary full I mapped it out bc I wanted to know how long I was trapped what year I would get out and how old I would be and that’s just #entranced in me no math no thinking #can’t think in any other way about it #but yeah something something autism something something my chronic depression anxiety #making me feel like very choose I made choosing to look at only the roads that are now closed and what could have been even if thetr easnt t #much of a chance for the other road or like why I decided what #anyways when I had idea for this post I meant to bring it up bc #I did acting right #but it was just small school stuff and trying out for like local theate companies and stuff #and like i didn’t go to far into it bc I had real really bad paranoia #like it’s better now #like it doesn’t mess with my life like it did or whatver BUT like I hated being on camera and people seeing me hearing me prociecing me.#like during the acting whatver but afterwards. like I’m better now I’m a private person don’t like to over share face on whatever online but #that’s also just internet safety right #anyways so I think it’s funny like yeqh person who hates to be prveeved and doesn’t want anyone to know there name or face go run quick and #become a television actor aim for a very ijnthe spotlight roll nothing bad can come from this ajdjdjd #feel like I lost the plot/whatver joke I originally had but I’m tired and have been doing property for like most of my waking hours the #past 2 days so if it’s not a hour like future interests in real estate my Brian’s scrambled

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