#like at this point i don't find The Power Of Friendship or anything an exceptional Useful or Valuable concept either & like

[unproduciblesmackdown]

speaking of, was remembering like i think i heard parts of defying gravity in the wild ever but i know popular & uhh. loathing from someone's showtunes playlist & then it's like oh yeah i know Of that one finale duet b/c i knew you i have been changed for good b/c they & a third party who were besties would be like okay if either of us die the other one will sing just one of those parts at their funeral & i'm like when you guys have hourlong conversations in here with me 7 ft away not included i sometimes have a contribution & say it during a long organic pause & nobody responds b/c you filtered me out....in parallel / affinity with being queer (& also not knowing that at the time, half a lifetime so far ago) where it's like okay i don't even want to get in on what you've got going on right now or be involved with that ever but it makes it quite Apparent i'm on a different & lower tier here

[deathbxnny]

Yanqing, Jing Yuan, Herta, and Kafka with an Emanator of Finality!Reader who follows HoFi!Kiana because I firmly believe that Kiana is Terminus (Aeon of Finality)!

Also, they're friends with Elio (Elio confirmed to be also an Emanator of Finality but maybe I'm wrong) just because they can.

-----♡

A/N: I had to look up the lore surrounding the concept of this, so if I got this completely wrong, then I'm so sorry, I did my best to understand. Also thank you for the request!<33

Content: Fluff, established relationship, some lore Spoilers??, angst if you squint hard enough, sfw

Reader has no set pronouns!

((Not fully proofread))

-----♡

》Herta

She'd absolutely want to know everything about you and conduct some experiments on your abilities, if you agree ofcourse. You give her the opportunity to learn more about a world that is still so vague and unexplainable even to her and she's most grateful for that.

She'd love to see you use your powers in her simulated universe and often gives you her odd backhanded compliments, that she however actually means well. Don't be surprised, if you find plenty of notes and files on you either. It's all in the name of sience ofcourse.

She's not afraid to voice her distate of Elio and will make sure to take up all of your time to keep you away from him. She doesn't want you to get hurt and doesn't trust him with you at all. Arguing with her on this is also useless, as she loves you way too much to listen.

-----♡

》Kafka

She's already familiar with the concept of your abilities and therefore doesn't make all too much of a fuss about it. Though she can't hide her excitement, whenever she sees how powerful you are. It's something she is proud of, when it comes to having you as a s/o, and she isn't shy to compliment you for your abilities either to the point of flustering you.

She likes fighting by your side, mainly because it makes her stronger and makes her feel much more safer. She feels unstoppable and is near addicted to your power. She'll teasingly call you her protect you and keep you close to her at all times.

She ofcourse doesn't mind your friendship with Elio and generally even uses it to her own advantage for whenever she wants to spend more off days with you.

-----♡

》Jing Yuan

Jing Yuan was a little concerned about the source of your abilities at first, but eventually began to accept that they were a part of you. He trusts you and knows you won't ever use them for anything evil or bad, which calms his worries however.

He likes to see your abilities in battle and often proudly smirks to himself, knowing that someone as powerful as you is his dear s/o. He loves to secretly therefore show you off to others, just to remind them who you belong to. He'll also like listening to you tell him more about your abilities, which makes him mentally wonder how to use it best in any upcoming battles.

He absolutely does not approve of your friendship with Elio and will try calmly telling you so. He doesn't want to control who you're friends with, but this is an exception to him. He doesn't want you to get hurt or used, so he'll slowly try you to get you to distance yourself from Elio for your own safety.

-----♡

》Yanqing

Yanqing doesn't question your abilities much and just happily accepts them as a part of you. He enjoys watching you fight and use your abilities, mainly because he finds them just that fascinating. He also always eagerly listens to you, whenever you tell him about your powers.

Yanqing will ask you to train with him often, as he sees you as a worthy and perfect opponent. You don't have the heart to tell him, that you hold back alot of your powers to not hurt him in the process, but he thankfully never notices either. He's just happy to spend time with you.

He doesn't know much about Elio, but after asking his Master about him, he decides that he's not a suitable friend for you. Yanqing would never force you to do anything, but he still voices his worries and fear about your friendship. The last things he wants, is to lose you, after all.

-----♡

A/N: I hope this was okay! I'm sorry if I got it wrong and thank you again for the request!<33

[cindersnows]

ok @storgicdealer i started writing out a thing in your askbox and then lost it so im writing it in a post instead.

freevic ramblings

(...that kind of ended up turning into mangvic my bad)

ok so like. vic escapes the youtube video. and they find the freedom ad and instantly go into the outernet. theyre one of the first citizens of carteblan, and exactly the type of stick freedom had set out to help when he started a city in the outernet.

(for a little context; the original victim is still dead, as well as all her clones. in my hc/theory, the victim we know who starts rocket corp and lives in the outernet escaped from a youtube video after basically just living out his own death in a fucked up loop over and over until she gained sentience and decided to break out. she's like. a copy of the original victim. haha xerox of a xerox.)

in the beginning, most of the houses in carteblan are still being built, so vic ends up rooming with freedom. and they were roommates. they become friends pretty quickly and freedom tries to help vic come to terms with their trauma and stuff, (he doesn't know that vic escaped from the youtube video --- vic is insecure about being a copy so they lied and said they just survived the deletion and got to the outernet).

they both get happier together even after vic decides to move out and start their own company. freedom's happy that vic's moving on from what noogai did to them and becoming their own person (hahaaa if only he knewwww,,,). freedom also decides to support the company as it's the first proper organization thing to open up in the town and it's pretty useful! as carteblan grows, freedom gets officially appointed as mayor and rocket corp kind of becomes tied in with the government, giving them tech and stuff.

i don't think freedom and vic ever properly label their relationship as anything other than a friendship, though they do go on dates and stuff pretty frequently. its pretty queerplatonic actually. vic likes to spend time with freedom a lot because he makes it feel like a normal person, a good person who's doing what's right for society. for freedom, hanging out with vic is like a breath of fresh air, one of the few things that didn't change after he was given responsibility over and entire city of traumatized stickfigures.

sometimes vic has major depressive episodes where its difficult for him to do any work which makes him even more frustrated, and freedom is the only person she really considers close enough to help. they remind me of that one short where the couple text each other "feet pics" to get each other out of bed when they're sad.

honestly, when i think about it, i'm pretty sure freedom is the only person vic actually considers a friend. most other people she hangs out with, she only vaguely likes, and a lot of the time she has to pretend to like people for pr. (in my hc, their relationship with the mercs is purely transactional, and i doubt either party is looking for more.)

both freedom and vic have insecurities about their relationships with other people; freedom has gotten into multiple romantic relationships over the years, though none of them have really stuck, and he often feels like people only like him for his power. vic feels like that too, but with the added feeling of "if people knew the real me, they'd hate me". they lie to everyone, so they feel like everyone's lying to them in return, with the exception of freedom, who's only ever been honest (and vic convinces herself that she's not lying when she says she's happier now and that rocket corp is working for a good cause).

freedom's probably unsure about the idea of capturing chosen (and dark?) at first, but vic manages to convince him by talking about how many people have been hurt by them and lost their home websites/games because of them. the capture is left up to rocket corp alone, since it was their idea, and since by this point rocket corp is basically just the military but if it also sold household tech. freedom's proud of vic for taking the steps to help keep other people safe after vic has frequently beat themself up for acting 'selfishly'.

spoiler alert: freedom gets called to the rocket facility after a massive fight is reported and the place basically blows up, and finds the color gang + chodark + kingduo + the mercs + vic and several other workers all badly hurt with signs of them having gotten into a fight. freedom automatically takes vic's side, because those are two terrorists fighting against fucking Rocket Corp, of course he's going to assume vic's in the right here.

but then cg and kingduo explain the situation (including the torture and the interrogation and sutff), and while freedom doesn't want to believe it, vic refuses to answer when freedom asks if it's true, and freedom knows in his heart that vic was the 'villain' here.

freedom is just. extremely disappointed in vic. and vic in turn feels horrible, because she was convinced freedom would take her side, having seen the ugliest parts of her and accepting her regardless. but freedom thought that vic had moved on, that she no longer wanted revenge, that she was happier.

he can't bring himself to formally arrest vic, much to the protests of cg+kingduo+chodark. they're best friends, after all, and freedom knows from his experience with his own animator that hurt people hurt people. but vic still needs to face consequences, and freedom knows more than anyone else what would hurt vic the most. he strips vic of his power, removing him from the position of the ceo of rocket corp and saying the government is going to take full control of it.

he also says that he's going to completely cut contact with her.

this hurts vic more than anything else, being abandoned by the one person she considered a friend, close to a lifelong partner, all because of her own actions. even after mango and purple decide to help pick vic off hir feet and become a better person, vic spirals, shutting out everyone else and refusing to connect with anyone.

it's only when mango lets vic stay with him after she loses all her property, continuously being kind to them even after seeing what a horrible person they are (because he's been in their place), that vic starts to open up.

this DOES lead to vic beginning to put mango on a pedestal the same way he did with freedom, but i mean, people don't change THAT easily. it'll probably take a few talks with purple to help break the cycle, since purple also struggles with idolizing people (albeit in a different way). i could say So much about victim and purple helping each other become better people but this is so long and also that's off topic so that's a ramble for another day.

[duhragonball]

Chainsaw Man ch.91-95

Somewhere along the way I noticed this series was set in 1997, but this is the first panel where it really felt like 1997 to me. For those of you too young to remember, this was pretty much what it was like most of the time.

Last time, Pochita fed a piece of his flesh to Power so that she could get strong enough to rescue Chainsaw Man from Makima. But then she got overwhelmed and appeared to surrender Denji instead.........

..... is what Power wanted you to think, because it was clever ploy to make a clean getaway! Power's awesome.

It's simple. No matter what, Power can't let Denji die because he was her first friend. As time wore on, she got fond of the guy, and despite her pathological lying, she admits the truth as she drags Denji into a dumpster to hide.

Inside, they both seem to turn back to normal and she gives him a hug. I say "appear" because I'm not certain Power can change back into her original fiend form, and it's possible that Denji is seeing this in his mind or something.

The thing is, Denji doesn't want to be saved. He's still riddled with guilt over Power and Aki's deaths, which was exacerbated by Makima. I think this was why Chainsaw Man looked so different over the last ten or so chapters. Denji was still in there, but it was like he had withdrawn from Chainsaw Man's consciousness.

Anyway, he feels like there's no point going on without Power, and she tells him that when the last of her finally dies, she'll be reincarnated as the Blood Devil again, with no memory of her former existence as Power. So she asks Denji to find the Blood Devil, befriend them, and turn them into Power again to renew their friendship. She calls this a contract, and in exchange, she gives him her blood.

And since blood is pretty much all that's left of Power, she vanishes, leaving Denji alone in the dumpster. Well, not quite alone...

Kishibe's been sitting in the alleyway, getting his drink on. I guess he was waiting for Denji to get his shit together. He offers to help Denji, but first he wants to know if he's Denji or just a chainsaw monster. He's got no use for the second thing.

Later, Kishibe brings Denji and Kobeni to some safehouse he must have set up. He says they can speak freely here, and that Makima won't be able to track them down for a while, so I guess it's soundproofed or something. I don't think he has a plan at this point. He just knows Makima's plan depends on Denji, so he's keeping Denji away from her.

Kobeni nervously asks if she'll ever be able to contact her parents again, and Kishibe tells her she probably never hear from them again, and she's more relieved than anything else. Denji's kind of surprised to hear this, because Kobeni seemed like a normal person living a normal life, the kind of life he always wanted.

They commiserate for a bit, and when you get down to it, they're not so different. Kobeni's parents forced her to work for Public Safety in spite of the danger, so that she could raise money to put her brother through school. It's a lot like Denji's life so far, where he's had to do a lot of difficult things just to survive, and other people made all the important decisions for him.

And Kobeni explains to him that adversity is normal. "There's no such thing as a life free of bad things... except in your dreams..." This starts to get the wheels turning in Denji's head. He wanted to be normal, and maybe he already was this whole time.

As Denji ponders this, Kishibe plops down in front of the TV, and a news report comes on about...

...Chainsaw Man. He's a hero now, which we already established earlier, but now Denji's seeing the news reports that Makima was referring to. Also, girls really like Chainsaw Man. Kishibe tells him to keep his voice down, but he doesn't get it. Denji's starting to get the old spark back.

He tells Kishibe he wants to eat steak for breakfast every morning, and he wants five girlfriends-- no, ten! He wants tons of sex! And that's why he wants to be Chainsaw Man.

But Kishibe pours cold water on his aspirations. The second he turns back in to Chainsaw Man, Makima will find him and kill him.

And he's right, so Denji settles down and broods over it. But that's okay. Makima may have fixed it so he can't become Chainsaw Man for the time being, but she can't stop him from wanting it, not anymore. Before, she had broken him, and convinced him that he was a bad person who didn't deserve good things, or to even want good things. But now he's rebuilding, and Makima isn't around to get in his head.

So at last, Denji can apply himself to the problem of the Control Devil. He wants to be Chainsaw Man again, but he has to kill Makima in order to do that. So what's the solution? Denji racks his brain, trying to come up with something from his months of working for Makima, but he draws a blank. All he figures out is that he still likes Makima, even in spite of all the terrible things she's done to him. He feels bad for admitting it, but he knows it's true.

Then we jump ahead a while. Denji has apparently resolved his dilemma, because he's transformed into Chainsaw Man again, and here comes Makima and her goons to finish him off. Does he have a plan? Or is this just a desperation play?

Makima's probably wondering the same thing. He asks her one question: When she's finished using Chainsaw's power to remake the world, will there still be crappy movies in it?

Makima doesn't get this, but she still answers him. Yes, she thinks the world would be better off without bad movies. And that's the problem. Makima thinks in absolutes. There are good things and bad things, and the bad things shouuld be eliminated. Bad dogs get put down. Bad employees are terminated. Bad devils are destroyed. Bad movies should be expunged.

But as Kobeni observed, bad things are part of life. We can dream of a life without bad things, but if real life actually worked that way, then our dreams would have no meaning. There would be nothing to aspire to.

Also, bad movies make good movies better. Denji and Makima went on that date and saw a bunch of bad movies and one good one. Makima noted that the good one made the price of all the tickets worthwhile. She sees the bad movies and the search for the good one as the price you have to pay for living in an imperfect world. She's willing to sit through bad movies to get to a good one, but she's also very interested in finding a shortcut.

Denji on the other hand, enjoyed the entire date. The bad movies made the good one sweeter, and the search itself was worthwhile for him, because he knows what it means to want something and strive to find it. That's what Makima is planning to remove from the world, and that's why Denji has to stop her.

So they fight again, and it's pretty much the same story. The hybrids are all here again, so I'm pretty sure they're immortal too or whatever. The only thing that's changed is that Denji is weaker than he was before, because humanity isn't afraid of him. Makima believes it's just a matter of time before he's finished.

And yeah, that's basically how it goes. Chainsaw Man emerges from that big pile of goons, and puts up a valiant struggle, but then he goes down.

Makima decides to finish him off personally, so she feeds him her blood to revive him, just so she can fight him one on one.

This part of the fight is pretty cool, because it's easier to follow the action, and this is what's it's really been about all along. Chainsaw Man lops off her head, and it just pops back on while one of her goons dies in her place. She punches him in the face and it looks like it hurts like hell, even though his face is a chainsaw motor.

But the outcome is the same. Chainsaw Man can't hold out against her power. She quickly dominates him...

And she rips out his heart. Game over.

From here, Makima seems downright disappointed with this battle. She tells him that he isn't Chainsaw Man, or at least not the Chainsaw Man she admired, the one whose power she craved for herself.

I think this proves that Makima wasn't able to separate Denji from Pochita without it coming to this. She wants the Chainsaw Devil, unburdened from the humanity of Denji, but that isn't working, so she has to tear them apart physically. She wanted Denji to just give up, and maybe that's what he did during that part where he had four arms and couldn't talk. But Pochita managed to reawaken Denji's spirit, with a little help from Power, Kishibe, and Kobeni, so now Makima has to beat him up and rip out his heart.

She doesn't understand why Pochita would join with Denji, since he doesn't seem to "get" Chainsaw at all. It's just like how she doesn't understand the value in bad movies.

Makima doesn't understand, and she doesn't want to understand, so she severs Chainsaw Man's heart from his body and that's it. Makima wins. I guess the next two chapters show her reshaping the world with her newfound power. I'm kind of interested to see how that plays out.

[snickerdoodlles]

ellebeesknees replied to your post "choose violence ask game except its just me complaining about fic tropes..."

☕☕☕.

ooooh three bitchy opinions 👀 okay so, not really a trope but:

authors who are snide towards canon

this one is kinda hard for me to describe, but you know those fics that have a line that Makes A Statement about something in canon and the tone of it is just bitchy? or just any sort of vibe where the author clearly thinks they're Much Better than the actual show writer? sighs.

we've all had that phase in fandom where we hate read/watch something and then bitch about it online but my god am i glad to be over that bullshit. if you don't like it here, you don't have to be here! there's nothing making you stay! I've noticed the trend that if the author's a snide cunt about canon, they're inevitably going to be a snide cunt about some canon thing i do like, and i don't need that in my life. you can disagree with/change canon choices in a way that doesn't automatically put down anyone who does like what canon did, and you can't do that if you're going to be smug and superior about what you do or what you don't like. canon is a sandbox and if you're not here to have fun, please go to a different sandbox where you will have fun, it'll be much nicer for everyone.

spite fic

similarly: i have negative patience for spite fic. what's the fucking point of spite fic? if you only participate in spaces you don't like, you're never going to find the stuff you like or convince anyone in those spaces to change their minds, you're just going to piss everyone off as you trample on their toes. i'm a little steamed thinking about this because of the debacle of people trying to start fights in tags, but overall its just so childish and exhausting. again: why are you here if you aren't having fun!!

like i said above, there's a way to...hmm, dance? with stuff you don't like that still comes from a place of love. like, personally! i do not like Macau & Chay friendship! which is a different post, but fandom largely likes to smash the two of them together for some reason and i Don't Get It. so i avoid that tag, but i wrote interior design with the sort of playfully-antagonistic dynamic i would love to see more of between them. but like, my point was "hey, has anyone considered how funny this would be" and never at any point "the other way people write them is WRONG." because it isn't wrong, it's just not my cup of tea. i'm rambling, but tl;dr- anything tagged with "spite fic" or is spite fic in vibes has me rolling my eyes and scrolling by, no thanks.

fix-it fic

okay so like. i don't automatically click out of anything with this tag, but i'm very leery towards it. my joy in fandom is exploring all the "what-ifs" of canon and canon-divergence is such a fun playground, but i've gotten...really, really frustrated with the fix-it fic tag over the past few years. a lot of fix-its revolve around "what if x choice never happened" scenarios and very often the answer to that is "this significantly more boring y result happened instead" and meh. generally, i find it more interesting to work with things that happened in canon than to just banish them, so anything starting with the premise of just erasing something is a hard sell for me.

for example! after kinnporsche ep4 dropped and the spurt of ~fix-it~ fic that dropped so that either kp didnt fuck or it was fully consensual or whatever. it just...missed the entire point of why it was narratively important, or stripped Porsche of the agency he did have during that scene, or missed the point of how Kinn can't ignore the power imbalance between them. i'm not going to ramble more on the meta about it here, but it felt like a bunch of people clutching their pearls and more anxious about making some fictional guys ~unproblematic~ instead of digging into the story the writers were trying to tell. plus, KinnPorsche as a ship minus the power imbalance or the tension of their circumstances is a much more boring story to me, so my inclination is to just scroll by anything wanting to avoid it.

another example of fix-it fic i hated was after good omens s2 came out, a bunch of people rushed to write ~fix-it fic~ where Aziraphale didn't go to heaven or it turned out ~he was drugged all along~ or anything that didn't have Aziraphale and Crowley splitting at the end. even a lot of the literal story metas dropping at the time were theories on how Aziraphale wasn't actually leaving Crowley or he was literally being brainwashed/drugged into it somehow, and it was just like. hmm. the s2 end was the natural build-up of the story (all???? of s2 was them miscommunicating or trying to find their new purposes in the world???) (also: in all trilogies, the 2nd story ends on a cliffhanger, that's How You Write Trilogies) and like. blah, idk, i get how the natural instinct is to want some comfort food after the bombshell, but the good omens tag (on AO3 and even tumblr in many ways) was impossible for me post s2 because i was really excited about their divorce and all the ways to dig into that split, but everywhere i turned was about turning the wheel back to erase it. bleh.

anyways, overall, nothing wrong with fix-it fic, but it's usually easier to just assume anything with that tag is not a story i'm interested in reading.

...reading back and the tl;dr of this post is that i find it more fulfilling to play in a sandbox i like and take all canon choices in good faith to work with lol

[ send a ☕, get a bitchy* fic opinion ]

*personal opinion, I'm not going to be mean

[illegally-blind-and-deaf]

People often wonder how I'm so happy and optimistic

Honestly I think it comes from experience and life and observing society.

I think as we grow up in an ever-growing tumultus world of confusion, anger, violence and hatred it becomes hard to see the good things. The media and news is flooded with bad news of wars and rumours of wars, murders, crimes, everything bad. There's hardly anything good in the news nowadays, unless it's a massive thing.

I think this constant barrage of negative information unconsciously teaches us to notice all those bad things in life, makes us feel that the world is falling to a point of no return and especially teaches us that happiness and goodness and joy can only be found in big things and events.

We seem to think (from my observation,) that happiness only comes when life is perfect, or when other big milestones happen, such as getting married, getting rich, etc.

In reality, that's not true.

We do not get joy from sitting around and waiting for these things to happen. We do not get joy when the world is fixed. We do not only experience the euphoric happiness of life when big major events happen.

The beautiful thing about happiness is that it's so simple. We are led to believe that happiness is a complexity that we can continue reaching for but will never grasp, but I don't think that's the case.

(Of course, those of you who are struggling with genuine concerns and mental illnesses, etc who are literally limited are the exception because happiness is really hard to find when there's a chemical imbalance in your brain, but this is more targeted at us who don't struggle with those things. Maybe this might help you, maybe not, but just keep going, you're facing a really hard battle, I love you.)

Let us look at a little child. The epitome of pure, wholesome joy. I don't know if you've seen little kids (we're talking 8 and below) but they have such a powerful goodness about them. Of course they're going to mess up, they'll make mistakes, they'll do s oome bad things. We're human, not perfect. But children have an inherent, unbiased view of the world and when they look at it, all they see is a new place for them to discover with excited curiosity and amazed wonder. The get excited over a butterfly. Or a bug. Or a flower. Or food. Or literally the thought of doing something. When was the last time we saw a butterfly and got excited? Or we skipped down a street with a flower in hand? When was the last time we saw a really cool car and watched it with wide eyes and an open mouth?

We have lost the wonder in noticing those little things. Those flowers and bugs and cars and trains have now become just part of every day mundanity, a part of the backdrop of our tumultuous lives. We've been led to think that being childish (in a good way, as in being excited and happy over little things, etc. Not being stubborn and unwilling to share) is a bad thing. It's not.

Mostly us (those who have experience significant trauma are the exception,) remember our childhoods, our early childhoods, as a time of golden innocence, where the world was wonderful. What's stopping us from looking at things like that again? Why shouldn't we smile at the massive fluffy could above us and imagine that we can pull them from the sky? What's wrong with getting excited about a dandelion and watching the seeds blow away in the wind? Why shouldn't we enjoy the warmth of our bed on a winter's morning, or play in the fallen leaves in autumn? Why shouldn't we be allowed to rediscover the beauty of nature?

Some of you may be thinking that life is too hard to do that. That there are too many things going wrong or bad to experience happiness.

Let me use my life as an example. Do not compare your struggles with mine, or think that you're weak because everyone is struggling with different things and THEY ARE ALL VALID STRUGGLES.

I'm going blind. I struggle to maintain friendships and I feel like a complete outsider in every friendship group. I wonder if I'll ever find someone who lives me the way I love people and I spend a lot of time in solitude. I worry that I'm not good enough for my dream universities and that I might not be able to do what I want in life.

Yet I'm still happy. I still laugh with joy whenever I walk past a very specific part of my street because it has the most magnificent view. I can still say I had a good day even with all my struggles.

Why?

How?

(Part of it is because of my religion which has definitely helped me in a lot of it, but becay se we all have different beliefs and values I'm focussing on a more general thing.)

Because life is hard. Life is the most challenging thing. There will be times when we want to just give up. But life isn't only about the hard things. Just because things are hard, doesn't mean they can't be good. An author can spend many challenging months formulating and drafting a book, wondering many times if they should just give up, but the reward of their own book being published and the learning and growth they experienced in the journey of writing the book makes everything worth it.

We cannot give up because things get hard. We must keep going.

Sometimes things don't get better. I'm not going to magically be able to see again. But I can still be grateful for what I have and see the blessings that are in my life. And they don't have to be dramatic, grand things.

I'm grateful for the clouds, because they're pretty. I'm thankful for the sun, especially in late autumn and winter afternoons. I'm thankful for cups of tea with buttered scones on mum's fancy china. I'm thankful for books, for technology, for my friends who still talk to me and listen to me even when I do seem a bit much. I'm thankful for what I can see now and that I had the chance to experience sight. I'm thankful for the time I have to be alone because I can do the things i live, like read or write or just think. Im grateful that i have the opportunity to even consider the possibility of going to a prestigious university and that I have a chance. I'm thankful for my talents and skills and I'm thankful for learning so I can develop more. I'm thankful for my creativity, for leaves. I'm thankful for the butterflies, the dandelions, the trains and the really awesome cars.

There is so much good in the world. It doesn't have to be majestic or grandiose to be good. It can literally be a shower. Or chocolate. Or a really funny cat video. It can be anything that makes YOU happy.

Happiness comes when we seek out those little things. When we make the effort to notice them. To put on music that makes us feel better and to do the little things we love. To go outside and look around us, not on the pavement. When we take the time to really think about what we have and the potential we have.

These are just my observations on why I'm so happy and optimistic. Because I don't wait for happiness to come in a grand fixing of my problems, but because I go out, I become like a little child and I learn to enjoy the small little things that give me bursts of joy.

[z-saint-box]

High Guardian Spice Series Review

[reviewing the show as a whole]

"So what exactly was all the fuss about?" "Is this review a food?"

[If you haven't already, I recommend reading some of my episode reviews for this series]

Scandalous and infamous, High Guardian Spice is notorious for everything that it is. If you're reading this, chances are, you are already aware of its nasty reputation. The series has received so much negative press, so much vitriol, that I was encouraged to watch it for myself. For this reason, it received much more attention than it is probably deserving of.

As a result, I actually love how provocative it is, because there are worse shows and better shows that have never achieved the same level of attention or infamy as High Guardian Spice. If you want a show that's even worse, just watch Angel's Friends. Critics are quick to point out the irony of the show's title, because all four protagonists are named after herbs, and not spices. However, the reason behind the name is revealed at the very end of the series. Rosemary, being the leader of her team, comes up with it; and as established, she is impulsive, and may even have below-average intelligence. But even after knowing the names of each herb, I never had a problem with the name of the series.

Critics are also harsh on the show's intro for being generic with simplistic lyrics. Yet, I'm surprised that they didn't mention Windy Wagner slurring the vocals. Even though another take would've been nice, and the fact I still don't know what's "warm and bright," I actually like intro theme for its optimism and sense of adventure; and the fact that opening sequence is synched to the lyrics.

To "become the light" means to become a hero, what the girls, especially Rosemary, intend to do. Just look at her face when she looks in the mirror. Her expression shows absolute determination and will. For the reasons above, I find myself listening to the intro on repeat and wanting to watch it for every episode.

Interestingly, High Guardian Spice is nowhere to be found on Windy's official website. In spite of this, I actually love the work she did for it.

However, I have a lower opinion towards the credits. While it expresses the joy of friendship, it just sounds too childish. While it does work for the majority of episodes, it absolutely does not when placed after episodes like "Festival of Fall" or "Scypith." The shift in mood is absolutely jarring and I don't know why anyone at Ellation Studios didn't notice. Both parts of the Autumn Processional conclude on dark endings, and after the scypith is killed, the girls melodramatically cry over its death before suddenly becoming happy again in the closing sequence.

It's even more bizarre considering the content warning before each episode. If the show is not meant for children, then why does every episode have an ending designed for toddlers? Raye has said that the advisory is not his doing; instead, Crunchyroll is responsible, even though the show is nothing a ten-year old cannot handle, save for a bit of profanity.

[the show's advisory, although what for?]

Although speaking of, I definitely dislike the swearing, not because I am a prude; but because the characters look too cute to use foul language. One exception is Rosemary calling Mandrake an asshole. It's not only funny, but she is clearly the kind of girl to use that word.

The major conflict in the world of High Guardian Spice is the battle between old magic and new magic. Despite this, the show is extremely vague about the difference between them. It is not clearly explained or even demonstrated beyond their names and how powerful they are. The best I understand is, terrasphere are new magic, and they amplify magic powers. If I am wrong about this, it's the show's fault for not being more clear.

Going beyond its allegory or metaphor for technology, new magic is a recent development in the show's universe, and the fact it can do anything, it should be causing problems in the world; i.e. new magic is causing new problems that have never been seen before, especially if it's more powerful than old magic for the world to responsibly handle. New magic is more powerful, but also more dangerous.

A lot of viewers speculate that new magic is behind the Fairy Rot; and in all likelihood, they are correct. For the reasons described above, new magic is causing the destruction of the Fairy Woods. All of this however, is in the subtext, or background.

I should also mention that I still don't know what a guardian is, beyond protecting someone or something. I'm willing to guess that a guardian is someone that defends Lyngarth, or it may even be a special class of people with special privileges. For that matter, High Guardian Academy might even be a military school.

Similarly, an explanation for why Rose's parents switched gender roles would've been nice. Likewise, it also would have been nice to know more about Chicory, Rosemary's older brother; because surely, he is an important person in Rosemary's life. But for whatever reason, he is not attending High Guardian Academy just like her, and he doesn't even show up in Rosemary's flashback in the third episode. Even though he could easily be written out the show without consequence, I don't want him to.

For the reasons above, the world-building is terrible. The most crucial elements of the story are not clearly explained or just as bad, under-developed.

Each of the four main characters have their own personal issue that suits their overall personality; Rosemary coping with losing her mother, Sage being caught between old magic and new magic as well as dealing with a school bully, Parsley needing to assume maternal responsibilities at home, and lastly, Thyme looking for a solution to the rot that is destroying her home in the Fairy Woods.

Initially, I didn't like Rosemary, not because critics say she is stupid and annoying; but because of her character design. Her hairstyle and frilly skirt are completely impractical for combat. However, I have eventually come to respect her for multiple reasons.

In the first episode, she wants to chase after an animal she believes has rabies. While this is obviously an extremely dangerous thing to do in real life and should have probably been replaced with something milder, this demonstrates her curiosity about the world, even if it is reckless.

She is an energetic tomboy that idolizes her mother; and wanting to be just like her, has a strong sense of justice and virtue, as well as perseverance and determination. This is best demonstrated in the second part of "Festival of Fall." Despite her feuding with Sage in the episode, Rosemary goes after Olive anyways and fights her.

As for Sage, she could've been my favorite character of the show. Despite ostensibly being the smart girl, the early episodes show how innocent and naive she is. Her stubbornness to adapt to new magic is actually her clinging on to her naivety and her desire to honor old magic.

While I have heard critics deride her outfit for being generic, this actually demonstrates the conservative nature of tradition. Despite being dressed modestly, she still looks cute anyways.

But all of this begs the question of why her parents send her to High Guardian to begin with if the curriculum is exclusively new magic. However, I speculate that they're so conservative that they are completely oblivious to the new standards, and even the fact that the world is changing.

Unfortunately, Sage loses her initial characterization in the episode "Crushing Obstacles." She comes across as condescending when she claims that guys do not talk about their feelings, despite Parnelle talking about his feelings to her in the previous episode, and even crying. Worst of all, Sage's behavior is triggered by Rosemary having a crush on Aster.

While it turns out that he is not a good match for her (at least according to what the writers intended), how Sage behaves is such a bizarre contrast to what she is like in the previous episodes. The reasons above are why I like Rosemary more than Sage, despite having a personality that is the polar opposite of mine; and despite Sage being a character I have more in common with.

Now would be a bad time to mention that I actually like Amaryllis. What I like is how, despite being much smaller than the entire student population, she dominates the school in spite of her height, and has a ton of fun doing it. Small, fearless, and proud, she is so entertaining that even the fandom likes her.

But my absolute favorite character is Parsley. Aside from being short and adorable, and also doing it with short hair, she is the most likeable protagonist for being optimistic, friendly, and cheerful. Having a great personality, she is the one main character that most people, even critics, are fine with. I also need to mention how she laughs in the episode "Transformations." Her laugh is so angelic, I find myself re-watching Rosemary burp just to hear it again.

But compared to the other girls, she has no meaningful conflict to face. Additionally, she has been a blacksmith since birth, she doesn't need schooling. The second episode shows that she is already proficient.

For this reason, I had to speculate why Parsley would like to attend High Guardian Academy. Her enrollment is redundant, and she can just get an apprenticeship under her father. However, another user I spoke to has speculated that, by going to High Guardian, she will be able to become her own blacksmith sooner. By doing this, she will be able to help her family out by earning a higher income.

I have also guessed that her life at home prevents her making friends. After all, before attending, it was her responsibility to look after her brothers. Without her, her parents will have more trouble taking care of the boys, although this could be mitigated if her parents had less. But by living away from home, Parsley does not struggle like the other girls do.

As for Thyme, I don't have any strong opinion on her. Part of the problem is that she is stoic; and as a minor criticism, her bow makes no sense whatsoever. The strings come out from the top and bottom, but then they magically connect.

[either she is distressed, or she had a bowel movement, from the episode "Festival of Fall, part one"]

The show is not formulaic; and because each episode is unique, I can easily identify any episode just by looking at a screenshot. I also love how each one begins with a cold opening, as a way to build anticipation for the next adventure that Rosemary and the girls will have. The best teaser is the one for "Rainy Day Memories."

While I prefer shows without a central story arc; and despite High Guardian Spice's linear nature, it is short enough that this is not a problem. And because there's only twelve episodes, the show has relatively strong continuity.

And even when the show's harshest critics have seen everything wrong with the show, it still has personality. Even if you think the show is terrible, it's still unique for what it is. You could even argue it's so bad it's good.

Overall, High Guardian Spice feels like a very rough draft that Raye and his studio weren't allowed to proofread or revise. The writing, being all over the place, encompasses an entire gamut from bad, to clumsy, to unfinished. What complicates everything is how the show was under-financed, badly promoted and rushed. After all, the production crew had to start the storyboard process for the first episode before the script was even finished.

A part of me believes everything would have been explained with a second season, but at the time of writing this, there are no plans for season two. And at the time of writing this, Ellation Studios has shut down. Interestingly, Raye would like to reboot the show instead of continuing it. I can only imagine how badly Crunchyroll (mis)treated the series as badly as it did.

In spite of all of this, the show looks great, and I absolutely adore the aesthetics. This includes the character designs and the environments; and at least the show doesn't use flash animation all that often. But High Guardian Spice is so cute, it's clumsy; or, it's so clumsy, it's cute. For these reasons, I actually like the show.

However, there is a caveat to note. Because I already knew a lot about the show before watching a single episode, I was already aware of its problems; so I accepted most of them without question and didn't take it all that seriously. Having low expectations, I just didn't find myself hating it as the average person.

Although, if you have seen my image of Parsley and Heauxy, you already know that I like the show enough to make fanart out of it, and the fact I posted screenshots from it.

There are easy fixes for most of its problems; and in fact, I could probably fix them myself. The most effective would be to remove old magic and new magic completely or to explain the difference between them more clearly.

And besides, with how much hatred it has received, it has a unique, but highly provocative identity, even when the production studio was not trying to make it that way. I actually like it for what it is. But what I really dislike is how difficult this review was to write.

With (or even because of) the amount of vitriol against it, there is still charm to be found in the world of High Guardian Spice. In fact, I'm in the mood to watch it again to see if my opinion sours.

For most critics, the show has left a bitter taste in their mouths; but for me, the show just doesn't taste all that bad. This particular spice is not meant for everyone; but at the same time, not all spices need to taste like cinnamon.

Grade: B - (is the internet going to kill me for this?)

[nancyrelocated]

THE WAY THIS WORLD WORKS, SHE FINDS IT DIFFICULT TO TRUST ANYONE. everyone's story is taken with a grain of salt because anything could be a lie. fabrication typically runs on the tongues of her colleagues, sticking like flypaper to their mouths and the syllables they produce. a lie is only as gruesome as you believe it to be, or whatever they say back home, when there's a barrel at the back of your head. ❝ don't bullshit me, Danvers.  ❞ the woman's last name escapes like a light venom, pointed as a sword. a hard glare is given to the woman, brown eyes making contact with a head of gold, then the opposing pair of blue.

A FEW MOMENTS AGO: the detective doesn't share her work with anyone, much less the finer details of her case. Carol is an exception and sometimes, the detective remembers why. this case has driven her into a corner in more ways than one. a missing woman, with connections to seedier parts of town, and a businessman who refuses to speak. one text and a few short calls later, the businessman is suddenly open for conversation and Carol leans against the leather couch of Nancy's office, triumph on her face.

❝ HE'S WILLING TO SIT DOWN WITH ME...  ❞ says she, mug of coffee extended towards the woman before she takes a seat of her own. the disbelief in her throat is convincing, though it never leaves past her mouth. the woman [ @warbyrds ] gives a sigh, shrugs her shoulders. ❝ in my line of work, it pays to have powerful friends. ❞

Nancy keeps herself quiet, crossing her legs and leaning back in her chair, eyes focused on the other. at last she nods. at last, she smacks her lips in feigned defeat. IN HER MIND, A NOTE IS MADE. ❝ fine. i'll let you keep your secrets, your vague friendships. whoever you called, ask them if they're into gift boxes or something like that ... i like to repay my assistance.  ❞

[gontagokuhara]

Also I was thinking about that one ask someone made in like 2019 when you said nagito had a shitlist that makoto and byakuya were on bc they're gay people he doesn't respect and I was like WHYYY im literally so used to nagito being up makoto's arse in both canon/fanon it was surprising!!! Also peep the nagito with hooves reference to Mr brunner in that post

Like since I went through the old asks earlier today idk if you were serious about it but nagito with hooves is quite literally just Mr tumnus and I kept laughing at the imagery while I was at work Ngl I was procrastinating on the 4 quizzes and 1 test I have tomorrow by reading some of the old pointy objects asks 💀

okay last thing I just wanna say I can't remember who named gonta but to me it was so unhinged and random so it was probably nagito wasn't it LMFAO also the idea of baby baby gonta literally makes me want to cry please keep doing him right in this fic PLEASE😭 okay that's it BYEE

Okay I just wanna say idk what rantaro looks like when his power is activated but I cannot imagine anything other than a That's So Raven mid-sentence freeze where he looks like the "Monday left me broken" cat. Just like "yeah so anyway I was—👁👁...." and shuichi has just,,,, never questioned it LMFAOO

hiiiiii <3 when i saw this last night i ALSO went deep in the pointy objects tag to find the asks ur referencing but also a littol trip down memory lane ahead of getting started writing. we all know the drill by now all of my ramblings are below the cut <3

first of all (because u sent this one first) ur very right about shuuichi being a little bit of a bozo wrt: noticing rantarou's having a Precog Moment. he's (rantarou) has grown pretty used to getting hit with brief flashes of the future, so he's pretty good at maintaining a poker face when he's struck by one. we see it the sliiiightest bit way back in ch1 while rantarou is driving, and in the middle of speaking he is hit with a vision — it's not something he elaborates on but he does see more or less what ends up happening once the monsters rush the car. naturally makoto and byakuya are good at sussing out when he's having one — and as a very heavy aside, it was a vision of him and shuuichi as best buddies his first day of school that had him pursuing the friendship so ardently, and ultimately got them where they are now. brothers <3

and yes back to those asks!!! they are up to like.....jesus christ late-2019 was over 4 years ago at this point so THEREfore so are the asks. that said, in reading over them all again i don't think there's anything i said way back when that doesn't hold at least slightly true currently (with one exception, being the mystery poly relationship ending, and that's more to do with issues i foresee in incorporating it into the fic itself in a way that makes sense). the ones about nagito though? DEFINITELY still bang all this time later

which leads me into: your questions! there is definitely a level of respect nagito allows towards makoto (byakuya....not So much LOL) but when you know a guy for thousands and thousands and thousands of years.....and he marries the obnoxious rich guy in what is so *obviously* a downgrade for a big five god like himself (not unlike how nagito at least somewhat views hajime as having somewhat "settled" for nagito; i could go on and on about the inner machinations of po!nagito i love that stupid fuck for how comparatively little he's on-screen)...............nagito is a little disappointed. even all this time later. he is not byakuya's biggest fan LMFAO

tbh so much of my early answers on nagito (aside from how he was actually Present the first few chapters, so it made sense) stem directly from the fact he (+ shuuichi) are the direct inspiration for pointy objects as a whole. specifically this video, which i credit ch1 as being the catalyst for pointy objects becoming.......well almost 200k and counting. shuuichi as percy's counterpart and nagito as dionysus the unpaid, eternally cursed camp counselor (with hajime as mr brunner, thankfully hoofless) was the starting point for pointy objects FOR sure, and it's just expanded quite a lot past that over all this time. that video jumpstarted the idea in my sister (who handed it over to me pretty much from the get-go), and the pjo musical is what i loosely structured the lore/plot around, but i think the observations i've heard from readers that pointy objects does well at expanding well past the boundaries of the source material hold true! if you do happen to take a peek at the linked video, though: pretty much the whole of ch2 was very heavily inspired by the song which i think is obvious on reread. that sprite edit started it all fr thank you youtube user evie

and yes: it was nagito who found and subsequently named gonta! 8 years and counting of gonta being camp's designated favorite by literally everybody (nagito) (hajime) (most of the campers) (the mioda triplets) (me, connorlizabeth bazwrites). as is probably obvious [gestures at my entire tumblr] i am gontas #1 ride or die, he's my pride and joy, and i will definitely continue having fun with po!gonta TRUST <3 in the spirit of not saying too much ill leave it at.........gonta enjoyers. we are going to eat good.

[apple-orchards-writings]

SYDNEY'S BOOK CRIMINAL... UE UE UE... Oooohhh the intersections of familiarity and intimacy and deviancy got me. Insane abt them. (Also a really enjoyable image in my head of Kylar returning a book late/marked up and Sydney going through the usual with getting out a marker, but when Kylar huffs and points out that they've already got Book Criminal written on them Sydney just says something about it needing to be touched up, and writes a little "Sydney's" above it...)

BUT LIKE!!! Okay. Kylar is Sydney's oldest, only friend, with exception to PC. (Likewise, with Kylar...) Their best friend, probably, or at least they were - someone they wanted to be around, enjoyed spending time with. And it was a desire, but not a bad one, surely? Their parents seemed happy about it!

They grew up together, we can presume, at least for a while... Not illogical to assume Kylar could have discovered masturbation first, clever kid nosing around on a computer, shown Sydney just because they were close, and it felt good, and there is an amount of pride to be held in having found something out like that. (From there, the seeds of the association are sown.) There's intimacy there... They're best friends, it's their special shared secret ! Not something they'd confess to anybody else.

It's blurry from there until school, Kylar's parents transforming and them splitting sometime between those points, but it's like. God. Do you reckon Sydney's thoughts might wander there from time to time, esp as purity drops, some fantasies to which they'd never admit? Cause if so, I think Kylar - someone they did know well and feel safe with for a while, who's right near their age, who they feel regret over and miss when they let themself reflect on it and still see pretty often at school and in the library when it rains - might have a good chance of featuring in them. (Kind of funny to me to imagine Syd waking up from a wet dream or so about it, or even just like feeling Kylar draw in marker on their skin and getting goosebumps from it, and immediately deciding that they will NOT be unpacking that, and instead praying extra today, also.) Especially once Kylar starts trying to pavlov them for real, whether they're thrown in closer contact by chance or PC intervention or what, finding themself thinking about it even more, not even minding as much as they sink further towards corruption... Them making it easier for Kylar to make their advances, urging them on or coming to them for it once they're past a certain point...

Stars. And on KYLAR'S side of things, slowly watching Sydney change as a result of their actions until it's Sydney pulling them in deeper (HOT)... Gradually recovering a level of trust and some relationship with them even if they don't mean to just by virtue of spending the time with them again, still upset about how it ended but receiving a warmth and familiarity that they haven't known for YEARS, an apology at some point, getting to work out some anger/stress a little bit with the control provided by something like this (having power over Sydney's arousal) and the fact that Sydney is, effectively, at their mercy once they're far enough in... Getting to talk about things!!! Their parents, with someone who could actually remember them!! Having someone besides PC they can lean on... Also the sex.

Stars. They're childhood friends!! And it's sooo easy just to put that label on it and ignore the complexities just underneath, Sydney's repressed desire mixed with their will to right things between them and them trusting Kylar with both, Kylar's own mixed feelings about their old friendship and their own desires seeing Sydney change under their influence, the fact that it IS kinda fuckt in power dynamic and so (TOXIC YAOI WIN!!!) but also has the potential for a really enjoyable dynamic... (possible eventual "sorry I trained you like a dog to get horny around me" "It Was Hot" which is . A little funny to me.)

But MORE THAN ANYTHING the point the main thought is just. Oh . of course it's easier for Sydney to accept their own desires and depravities with someone they know and trusted and who they care for despite themself, who already has those same depravities and doesn't do as much to hide them. Someone who already knows them. Who they could've loved before, who they might still in some way. (to the tune of "of course you have blue hair and pronouns") of course you have a tragic past friendship and repressed desires + fetishes to be appealed to....

SORRY FOR LENGTH. Bows. Gazes so sweetly upon any pavloving thoughts also (don't know why I focused on Sydney so much here I'm usually a Kylar person. Hm. Oh well)

(as a bonus treat. Imagine them fucking in the changing room w Sydney's little away sign on the table)

ANON ANON ANONANON THIS WAS THE BEST PRESENT YOU COULDVE GIVEN ME WHAT THE FUCK ANON IM CRYING THIS IS SO GOOD YOUVE BLESSED ME DONT APOLOGIZE FOR THE LENGTH THANK YOU

but omg the beginning with them being best friends and slowly discovering their bodies ahhhhh the loneliness they both must have felt during that separation, because even tho they still see each other in the halls or the library, there's a barrier that neither of them feel like they're allowed to cross,

but as soon as PC comes around and starts pushing them with Sydney remembering the dreams and fantasies they may have had about Kylar and slowly incorporating PC in there, just daydreaming of threesomes in the library, shifting around to hide their arousal

and when they both ultimately come around to a tentative relationship, the power dynamic you mentioned like yeah it is fucked up but even then it's a symbiotic thing because sydney can allow themselves to let go of their inhibitions, cause this is Kylar, and even tho there was unease and uncertainty for a while, they've known each other for so long, and the implicit trust is still there, and Kylar can exercise being a dom, because they also trust Sydney, and Sydney will tell them if they're going too far or not far enough, and they can switch the roles if they want!!!

OF COURSE YOU HAVE A CHILDHOOD FRIENDSHIP THAT ENDED BADLY AND FEEL REPRESSED, YOUR PRONOUNS ARE THEY/THEM /j

(also omg fucking in the changing room with the away sign, kylar gagging sydney with their hand because they're too loud otherwise, and the changing room is not that big, so they have to stay close to each other. syd biting into their gag and leaving marks on kylar's hands then sucking on their fingers to apologize, just the both of them going fucking crazy behind the curtain. imagine finding them tangled in each other, with kylar panting because of how good it feels, and just directing the whole thing while taking pictures. you have put worms in my brainnnnn, anon i could kiss you)

[starrlikesbooks]

Hey Castor, i'm trying to find a book to buy for my roommate for his bday. He likes fantasy and sci fi, and i only ever read more grounded, english-lit type stories so i'm totally lost. But then i thought, "hey! My longtime mutual Castor will surely know what's up." Have you got any recs? Preferably something from the last year, so he's not likely to already own it. Sincerely, world's biggest Don't Touch That Dial fan.

Hello best friend anon! I'm not sure what kind of vibe you're going for/what type of SFF your roommate leans towards, so here's a variety of vibes

The list got long, so here's a read more!

Cozy/Domestic

Kaiju Preservation Society (Domestic Sci-Fi 100%! Kaiju like Godzilla are kinda real and their gigantic interdimensional creatures most of the characters study like secret zoologistis. Except the MC. They lift boxes.) 🌈friendly

Legends & Lattes* (I know little about this book beyond sapphic fantasy running a coffee shop. If he likes cozy fantasy and is in bookish spaces, h knows about this. If not, but he seems like he’d dig it, he’ll love that you go it for him!) 🌈

We Could Be Heroes (Slightly older, but not well known. Very down to earth superhero/supervillain friendship where tone of them saw their mind powers and was like oh geez um I guess I’m supposed to rob a bank? and the other saw their super speed and went sweet I’m gonna get all the delivery tips) 🌈ish

Even Though I Knew the End (Magical noir. I’m counting this as domestic because a lot of the plot revolves around the MC’s partner and their shared life, as well as her motivations towards keeping her brother save and thriving. This would also fit under “mystery” though) 🌈

Weird and/or Unhinged

The Atlas Six* (Underground government picks taps someone to join per each division, but 5 of them are 100% gonna die) 🌈

Anything by Jason Pargin (AKA JDATE or Zoey Ashe*. JDATE books can be read as standalones and the newest one is about a gamified kids toy that’s demanding human body parts so a cult can summon something to end the world)

City of Nightmares (Gotham atmosphere, if you fall asleep you might turn into your literal nightmare. MC’s sister turned into a giant spider and ate her father, MC is both afraid of everything and willing to threaten people with violence in order to get what she wants, which is, namely, not in terrifying positions like being kicked out onto the street) 🌈friendly

Hell Followed With Us (If he’s horror leaning, and/or into trans people embracing the monstrous and destroying evangelical cults! Though if he is and he spends time in bookish spaces, he may already know of/have read this one) 🌈

The Sky is Yours (Not a new book, but not one ever talked about so probably safe. Basically a Jetsons future, except they can’t use most of their cool technology or thrive because they’ve been being tormented by dragons for like 80 years that won’t stop burning their city down. This one is also kinda satire styled.)

Mystery

Self Portrait With Nothing (Magical portraits, lost mothers, off beat and kinda weirdly emotional while also having a bit of a mystery plot. Extra points if he’s into The Raven Cycle or The Dreamer Trilogy at all.) 🌈friendly

The Library of the Dead* (Edinburgh based urban fantasy with an amateur detective tapping into the occult. Also, ghosts!)

The Bruising of Qilwa (A novella about immigration/xenophobia and a also mysterious, fatal illness that may be murder.) 🌈friendly

Witness of the Dead* (Came out about a year and a half ago. This is a mystery set against politics in a steampunk fantasy world, and is sure to be a bit dense in spots. It's a companion novel to The Goblin Emperor) 🌈

Questy

Last Exit (Plays out like the end of an epic. Former friends from college have to reunite and cross world again as darkness slips out and they try to reach their long lost leader, left to the other side.)🌈

Soulswift (A little older, but not by much. Girl gets semi possessed by the god of another culture’s religion AKA the Lilith figure in her own religion that she’s a nun in. Forced allyship & forced proximity leading to a lot of cultural understanding and romance, on the way to make sure she doesn’t actually die.)

Lost in the Moment and Found (In a series of novellas, but works as a standalone. Girl finds a door to the place lost things go, and enjoys adventure- but things aren’t as they seem. Big content warning for grooming & attempted SA!)

The Stardust Thief* (A thief, a Djinn, and a prince have to go on a quest for a legendary magical lamp! Based on 1001 Nights.)

Gay!

A Strange and Stubborn Endurance (Treaty based marriage with an assassination plot ramping up the tension. Big big content warning for SA and PTSD!)

A Marvellous Light (Murder mystery with magic and forced allyship/coworkers to lovers between a magician and a regular Londoner who accidentally got the job.)

Light From Uncommon Stars (This could also passably go under the Weird category, but it’s just so inherently queer it needed to be here. Women takes souls of violin prodigies to win back hr own soul. The other main character a formerly homeless transwoman sex worker who suffered abuse, and the teacher’s love interest is an alien with kids including an AI daughter, who’s super into running her donut shop. It’s also very diaspora and Asian centric!)

*have not read yet

[rabbitindisguise]

Oh, and to update my recently watched anime

favorite gay anime:

link click seasons 1 and 2 (ongoing, up to episode 9)

ayaka (ongoing, up to episode 10)

bungo stray dogs season 5 (ongoing, up to episode 8)

mononogatari seasons 1 and 2 (ongoing)

non-gay anime (shorter summaries):

my happy marriage - kind of has poly fodder but not of the best quality. I like the animation. Not a lot to say honestly

dark gathering - super scary, but very hopeful and slice of life simultaneously?? it's hard to describe. The little girl takes the role of boy prodigy and the main protagonist (the guy) needs to be rescued by her constantly because he attracts ghosts. A very interesting inversion of a standard anime trope.

comments for the rest under the cut!

link click

oh my god I don't know why I didn't watch this sooner. It's really good, the animation is gorgeous, and the time travel mechanics are possibly the most interesting ones I've ever seen in fiction ever. There are thought out limitations to the supernatural abilities like in bsd but in a subtle way- there's no government body explaining it, they're just making it up as they go along. The relationship between the two protagonists is also really interesting, it's definitely going to be on my rewatch list because of it.

ayaka

Surprisingly this has been one of my favorites- it hit a lot of tropes I'm not familiar with and definitely want to explore more in the future because they're giving me a lot of emotions. The tl;dr on the plot is a guy (J-something, green hair) who's willing to give his life away to protect his home islands, and him making re-establishing his friendship with the person he's going to be dying for (the water dragon) while the other guy has no idea that's what's happening. It's at the point in the season where I genuinely have no idea if green hair is going to live or die- the reveal was super gradual, going from the pov of the protagonist and transferring over to him and showing he's been dealing with all of this without telling anyone.

It also killed another character off the same way (dad, saved the island the first time) so I'm not sure if the power of friendship is going to save him, which is terrible. He even fits one of my favorite tropes of "guy who seems like he's slacking off is actually better than everyone else at his job" type of thing (aka kakashi). If he doesn't live I'm going to be sad about it on tumblr probably, and if he doesn't I'll be overjoyed and reblog spamming gifs so you'll all find out what happens lmao

bsd seasons 5

I mean I'm not sure I can say anything new about bsd because it's a gay staple of anime, except that maybe I liked this season a lot better than the last one because it incorporated a lot more characters I liked. The cliffhanger was kinda meh last season also. But this season has been really solid on the follow through, and it hasn't been full of really tedious flashbacks that detract from the usual interesting multilayer ongoing plotlines.

It also has dazai, and honestly he's the main reason I love the series- I don't really like some of the developments where his relationships with other characters go down darker paths though, or get simplified down or the subtext removed to make space for plot. The reveal that the several seasons of homoerotic subtext was because a character (angsty black tendrils guy) didn't have long to live is an example of that, the lack of a good explanation was why it was so compelling, so a so-so explanation is really disappointing. But! I guess it's fine because he keeps just building more relationships like that :') I really liked their trio though (dazai, tiger guy, and angsty guy), this scene lives in my head rent free

I feel like in the first couple seasons they had more to fight about, and now that some miscommunication has been resolved it feels like the emotional development between the characters hasn't carried over to the actions of the plot. Which is a huge bummer. A big draw of the series for me is the nuance of relationships between characters, and lately it's been greatly reduced in the ones I got attached to and lots of that energy has been dumped into characters I'm kind of lukewarm on. (Though even those relationships have been skimped on- there were like 0 longing or intense looks at all. Everyone instantly gets gayer around dazai but he's kind of ridiculously stiff ever since THIS scene

And yeah sure I'll never seriously ship him with anyone else, there's no coming back from that, but seriously if he's going to be like that I wish there were more flashbacks to this relationship so I could at least get more ship material to angst about before bed.)

mononogatari

This was rough getting into, but once I got past episode two there was a lot of great poly ship potential so it was totally worth it. It's a sweet slice of life style supernatural series, which is a nice change of pace. There's action but it's very emotional and in a more multilevel way than a lot of common anime where there is one main hero being supported by friends/community. There really isn't a main hero so the direction of support hits a lot of different directions, so the scenes where people talk about the support of others hit different, which I feel like is a big part of the poly appeal to me. Sword guy + botan + main protag is my main ship, but there are lots of other combos that work well.

[melissa-titanium]

Ive never watched mp100 so Idk anything about Mob but im genuinely curious, why do people keep drawing Mob & Six together as friends? (not hating on it btw I love it actually lol) im just curious as to how they would work as friends lol

ITS FUNNY BECAUSE. I DONT THINK IVE EVER ACTUALLY SEEN THAT FRIENDSHIP PAIRIG BEFORE ? ??? unless i am wildly stupid and rbed a post about it a while back... im not sure. w/e

six is obviously a VERY flighty kid, constantly ready to book it the hell out of wherever shes at. smart, determined, and after ln2 she won't stop for anything or anyone who could potentially slow her down. unwilling to form companions, after haivng already caused grief for two in the past.

i think shigeo's patience and general non assertiveness would leave them good friends. not only that but their shared experiences in hurting someone they love & self isolating as a way to not let anything like it happen again.

i feel like six feels she's at blame for rcg's death & the reason she dropped mono felt to me as like "you hurt me, i hurt you, it's better if we split so i don't do anything else" inadvertently causing a self fulfilling prophecy for the both of them.

shige hurting ritsu. his solution to having it never happen again is push down any sense of the thing that caused it -- his powers, and by extension, his emotions. some level of self isolation, aNOTHER self fulfilling prophecy directly accumulating towards meltdowns that have similarly devastating affects.

obviously i don't think they'd understand their similarities from a narrative perspective because they only have their own experiences to go by but. im not sure how they'd even meet. assuming six was out of the nowhere, somehow got trapped in a space with shige, i think they'd chill.

ofc six being six she'd lose her shit scared, but i dont think shige would have any reason to bother her. say theyre in the s&s office. she hides under a table or some shit. she recognizes hes a kid though obviously so its not like fuck, how do i kill him? fear its more like fuck, unfamiliar kid i could potentially hurt, what do i do?

shige's generally unintimidating aura and autistic swag would def help her chill. he doesnt need to talk, she doesnt need to talk, they just sit in calm silence. shige has always seemed like a steady calm figure and obv that would help six. autism to autism communication. non communication? ive always seen six as nonverbal or semiverbal. they send brain waves to eachother

i can totally see them just hanging out. how? not sure. considering six would probably try to find some way to kill any adult she sees or like crawl under benches or into trash cans to get away. six would definitely be afraid of shiges powers but thats whats cool about them is that he Almost Never Uses Them so at the point where he does end up using them shes probably chill enough around him that she doesnt freak the fuck out and start mauling him. its like befriending a stray cat except the cat is very much not a cat, it is a severely traumatized 9 year old who has never been to school and most likely has never seen anyone over the age of 11 who hasnt tried to kill her. its actually hard for me to think about how theyd be with one another ill have to think on this...

[lizardboyhole]

Haunted house & robots.

This one was really weird because it was like a movie.

This family went with some friends to a historical old house and started chatting with the old lady that lives there. There on like a rooftop patio sitting around in garden furniture. The wife started getting a little weird but no one noticed. Then the old lady made a condescending face and said stuff about this place being haunted and you punks don't know shit kinda stuff. Then the wife gets weirder and is holding something in her hand while she talks back she's getting angry and kind of slurring like she drunk. Then suddenly everything goes dark and you see a ghost where the wife was and she goes "oh yeah, I don't know anything about the ghost here?? Watch this!" And everything goes back to normal except the wife is still the ghost but now you can tell she's holding a gun and right when she says "this" she shoots herself in the head. For some reason the head completely exploded despite it being such a small gun. Probably because the ghost used something more powerful when they had killed themselves.

Then a quick jump to not very long in the future where the son is going to school and it seems like a completely different movie about school and friendship where he's just trying to survive with his best friend. But in the background you can see other students acting weird. It starts off looking like just a group of bullies but over time they get more undead-ish and more violent over little things. Like at the end of the school day while the son and his best friend are talking out their troubles you see the gang confronting a small guy in gym clothes for being smelly and after they push him around a bit they just take him away.

At the same time that this is happening the husband is exploring the haunted house with some lady who's sensitive to ghostly stuff. It's spooky now and more run down looking that it was before. She finds two mysterious micro data cards she takes one and gives one to the old lady to investigate. Then a robot horse appears and starts shooting from it's nose. It chases the sensitive lady to the roof where she hides and you see a close-up of the robot horse face and you can see it has spooky glowing mist eyes.

Then I don't really remember why but the son is out in the backyard digging when a massive dude comes out of nowhere, everything goes dark again and the ghostly dude ties him up and throws him in the hole he was digging and starts to bury him. Ghost giant has a really goofy evil laugh. The husband/father shows up and grabs the kid and they run for it. The ghost giant hops on a motorcycle on the roof and looks like he's gonna chase but then the sky goes back to normal and he dissipates.

Things around town are going wild the kid goes and finds his best friend and a few others, they see a sort of parade come down the street out of nowhere. It's made up of zombies and ghosts and robots. You can see the bullies from earlier also they see someone they know who's now a zombie and riding in a cart. They go and talk to him and tell him to stay strong they'll try and fix things. The guy is happy to see them and says sure he'll do his best to keep his brains intact even though the back of his skull is gone leaving them exposed.

The father, the sensitive lady and the old lady are running around the haunted house again but this time there's more ghosts and now little gremlin things. When they have a break they talk about what they found out from the micro cards and their card was normal cryptic stuff but the old lady said that she found out about her dead husband's secret research into combing ghosts and robots. The hoard of creature's finds them and chases them around at one point the sensitive lady gets tripped up and is trying to struggle away but as she's struggling she's also helping them twist up some old fabric into a sturdy rope to strangle her with. The old lady appears and helps her up while telling her off for not noticing what they were doing.

Again the sensitive lady and the father find some micro data cards but as soon as she grabs them a huge noise happens and the door explodes open and they're separated again. She runs to the door to a little patio while trying to securely hide the cards in a gameboy??? She gets outside and climbs over the side to try and hide behind the decorative siding but as soon as she gets there a massive robot head making loud scraping noises sticks it's head out. It's glowing mist eyes looking right at her, it startles her and she slips.

That's where the dream ended.

[foxounderscorecube]

A Court of Silver Flames - Sarah J. Maas

4¼ ⭐

I think this is the best book in the series! So far, at least.

It's also probably got the most sex, proportionately, which is a downside for me but not specifically a failing of this book. I feel like this probably edges (ha) into the category of erotica with enjoyable character development and plotlines between the sex. I personally think that Maas is pretty good at writing erotic, but not explicitly sexual, scenes, but one of the sex scenes in this book described Nesta's vulva as a "drenched entrance" and those are certainly words you could use, but not ones I'd consider appealing.

That aside, I just love Nesta. I was worried that her and Cassian's dynamic might be less interesting with them as the main focus, but nope! They're so fucking arrogant. They love each other so much. They're so cute. They're both too proud to admit any feelings and when they do it's just! ah!!! I love them. I find their relationship WAY easier to be invested in than I ever did Feyre and Rhysand's.

I think one of my favourite things is how Cassian is such a cringefail loser. He's all full of bravado and stuff but he acts like such a nerd up close and, as much as I liked him before, it endeared him to me a lot more.

Nesta is a bitch always, and we love her for that, but her change in perspective as she gets through the worst of her depression and finds hope and friendship is so beautifully written. I love Gwyn and Emerie and I love how they find confidence together after their various struggles in life. I love that Nesta makes the House of Wind into her friend. So many bits in this book just made me smile, you know?

Sidenote with no bearing on anything: how the fuck did they just lose Bryaxis? I thought that was going to be a plot point because a few times the Night Court people are all like "Hey, you seen Bryaxis since the war? No? Me either, wonder what that's about" and that's that. There's going to be another book after this, right? Maybe it'll be relevant to that. I, for one, hope that Bryaxis is living its best life and on the road trip of a lifetime, making friends left, right, and centre, because it always wanted to be friends with someone.

I thought the plotline of Feyre's pregnancy was kind of eh? I don't know, really. I think it was sad how Nesta was treated about that. I do hate how Rhysand just neglects to tell Feyre very important information that could dictate whether she lives or dies. Why does he have a habit of doing that? Nesta letting out that Feyre's likely to die in childbirth in an argument was poor form, but she was right. It was disrespectful that literally everyone except for Feyre knew that and I think Feyre should have been WAY more pissed off about it. That she does end up dying in childbirth - that's Feyre's third death, by the way - and that it's only Nesta's death god powers and magical artifacts that save her is very dramatic and cool but damn, if the timeline were even slightly different, the Night Court would have found itself leaderless.

This series is a lot of fun, and this book was just genuinely pretty heartwarming when Cassian's not cumming in his pants because Nesta looked at him. I wonder if the next book will be Elain's perspective? The overarching plotlines are there, but Nesta as the main character seems pretty wrapped up, if that makes sense. Maybe poor old Lucien will actually get some love, if so.

[kapanbenernya]

Super Cub -- Why I Like this Anime

Let's first get something out of the way: I'm not big on animes; I am more of a manga man. Settle down folks, and let me articulate my point for a few minutes.

First, I like that manga can be accessed leisurely. Meaning that I can just sit anywhere with a book or some scanlation and I can put it down and pick it back up anytime I want without allocating a special schedule in my day just to sit down and watch something.

Second, I think the voice acting in animes can be a bit much. With all due respect to the English or the original dub: it can be cringe. Yes I know it's a great moment in life when the protagonist du jour finally awakens the power of gangbang and unleashes this legendary super move that he made the fuck up just fuckin now, but for the love of God you don't have to scream like that.

And now that I have elaborated on those two points, it's time to seal it up in a bin, throw then out, and flush em away, because it is now time for me to gush about this 2021 anime that I adore: Super Cub.

So what's Super Cub about?

No it's not about a furry that awakens superpowers, it's about a girl in a small town named Koguma. As the show says verbatim she has no parents, no hobby, no friends, no money, and no goals in life. She essentially is nothing but a husk at this point just trudging through life. One day, she bought the titular "Super Cub", a Japanese low cc motor scooter. And suddenly she finds her life changing slowly but consistently.

Koguma, and her new whip

And then suddenly the scooter talks and transports her to the scooter isekai filled with motorbikes and adventure right?

Wrong. Nothing happens except "girl with bicycle" is now "girl with scooter". No magical powers, no talking scooters, no secret assassin, and no sudden tiddies. The anime is so mundane that the only "crisis arc" in the first episode is just the protagonist being stranded at midnight because she ran out of gas. Apparently it didn't cross her mind that her bike that runs on combustion engine needed fuel to run, or that she needed to refill it. The second episode started with Koguma kind of wanting to brag to her classmates about her new bike, except she decided against it. And her decision was correct since when her classmates found out that all she owned was a manky old bike, she got nothing but jeers.

Goddammit Koguma, does anything nice ever happen to you? Ever?

And this is the point the protagonist snaps and the evil that's sealed inside the cursed bike helps her exact revenge! Mwahahahha...?

Also wrong. And I hope you'd stop interrupting me, little voice in my head.

One positive thing actually happened to her. One of her classmate named Reiko is actually super into manky old bikes. And that's when Koguma finally found her first friend. The friendship itself also doesn't feel forced or rushed, it started from small awkward talks up until the point Koguma stayed at Reiko's house and finally feels like they're comfortable with each other. They didn't just automatically become best friends and raise a gang of super cubbers together.

Nope, not in the anime. They could not afford the hair gel

That's it? This shit sounds like it fuckin sucks

Maybe if you compare it to high-octane production these days, but I believe this slow paced next-to-nothing-happens is exactly the stuff that made me fell in love with the anime. The closest comparison that I can make is Yuru Camp if it was even MORE slowly paced. And sometimes you don't want some fast-paced action, you want something comfy to wind down from the daily hustle and bustle of life. And to me, something like Super Cub is absolutely perfect.

The other thing I like about this anime is how real and sincere it feels. The super cub didn't change Koguma in any way shape or form, Koguma changed herself. It was her that decided to pick up the bike, it was her that decided to reciprocate Reiko's friendship, and it was her choice to improve upon her life. The bike simply enables her to do so.

In Brief

I'm just gonna say it straight: I like it. I like the beautiful still shots of the scenery, I love the occasional classical music they put in the quiet scenes, and I love how grounded and heartfelt the characters' motivation feels. I also love how the anime seems to have an implicit moral message that "Life can change". If you feel you are stuck with your life going nowhere, try to make a positive change; no matter how small, no matter how slow it takes, as long as it changes you for the better. I mean who knows, it might be the thing that will finally take you where you wanted to be.

With your Cub, you can go anywhere.

7/7/2023