#like I'm not mad at the lack of nudity

[locke-esque-monster]

The Boys is the kind of show where there's a truly unhinged thing happening roughly every 5 minutes - in defiance of reality, physics, ethics, you name it.

But somehow I have the most trouble believing that when Butcher fell and hit his head in the shower, leading to him falling out of the tub and taking out the shower curtain, that said shower curtain magically wrapped around his waist protecting his modesty.

[colorisbyshe]

List of my Veilguard Complaints... just all together... getting it out of my system and then making it reddit's problem:

This game felt so emotionally flat. I think... the reviewers calling out the game for "therapy speak" weren't entirely wrong. It's more exposition speak and the fact that EVERY SINGLE feeling EVERY SINGLE trauma EVERY SINGLE event needs to be processed, out loud. It's not "too woke," it's just emotionally... spacious. Because you're forced to explore EVERYONE'S interiority... it feels like they have none left, does that make sense? No one has hidden depths because they announce and process every thing they go through, often immediately after it happens. It's hard to imagine any additional depth

It's also hard because... no one... has that much depth. Everyone has weaknesses and bad things that happened to them but it feels like there was a lack of... real character arcs? People had character sub plots. "Accept this thing about myself" was the main one. Which... doesn't help the therapy speak accusation.

No one is a bad person. The crows? The human trafficking, child soldiering, murderous gang? They're the good guys and we should be happy they rule Treviso! Lucanis is just a good guy doing good work. Neve works with Magisters and Templars and some of them are bad... but not her friends. She only works with the good ones! The dalish form a group with Qunari and human members and they're just a diverse coalition who... love mages now (despite having kicked them out last game?? okay). Literally NO ONE is allowed to be EVEN A LITTLE morally dubious unless they'er a Bad Guy or they're fucking solas

I MISS BIOWARE GREY MORALITY! THATS HOW BAD IT IS! I FUCKING MISS IT I MISS IT I DO BRING BACK ANDERS BRING BACK ZEVRAN BRING BACK MORRIGAN AND FUCKING CULLEN AND FUCKING BLACKWALL BRING BACK ISABELA BRING BACK MERRILL AND HER DEMON SHIT! BRING IT BACK

"Oh, we're treasure hunters but we're not COLONIZERS! We don't steal cultural artifacts! We return them to the real owners, we're pirates but we're NICE AND RESPECT PRONOUNS!" CHRIST ALIVE!!!

EVERYONE WE MEET IN TEVINTER IS NICE??? EVEN THE GANG??? THE THREADS GANG IS NICE!! THEYRE SCAMMRES BUT THEYRE SO GOOD ITS A HAPPY ENEDING IF ONE OF OUR COMPANIONS RUNS THEIR GANG??? WHAT???

It was... a little bit awesome to have dorian become a violent revolution man but like????? Then Minrathous gets nuked so the game is too cowardly to even do that shit

AND THATS THE OTHER THING! This game made sure NOTHING matters choice wise! Oh, you chose to save Minranthous? It gets nuked at teh end. Oh, your choices fro previous games? Only matters if you romanced Solas but Dorian might call your Inquisitor "Amatus" in a non-cut scene dialogue. FUck you if you romanced anyone else. Southern Thedas is just.... all dead now... it's over... so any choices you mad ether eare NEVER going to be relevant. The companion personal quest choices really don'tmatter and won't matter next game.

THEY KILLED THE DNA OF A DRAGON AGE GAME! No grey morality, no meaningful choices, fuck... barely any romance once you flirt (NO POST-ENDING ROMANCE SCENE!!! EVEN MORE SHY ABOUT NUDITY!), AND NO FUCKING THEMES!

What was the theme of this game? Following Solas' story, it might be redemption or letting go of the past, I guess, but?? Do the main stories tie into that? Not really. We have ONE part of a hcapter be about Rook letting go of regrets... for deaths that jUST happened not even anything lingering.

Plots around OPPRESSION ANTI-ELF AND ANTI-MAGE DISCRIMINATION?? Gone... IN A STORY ABOUT TAKING DOWN SLAVERS... LIKE THE OG SLAVERS??? Yeah, it doesn't matter. We have idle talk about slave revolutions and that's... it?? I'm an elf in Tevniter and no one cared. What? Qunari and Elves and humans are all besties except the Antaam (some of which still become besties)... what? How do yo drop the single strongest through-line in the series?

"Oh, well it takes place in the north, it's different rfrom the south!" OKAY BUT THE FALL OUT IN THE NORTH LITERALLY NUKED THE SOUTH OUT OF EXISTENCE, I CAN'T GET SOME LINES ABOUT CULTURAL DIFFERENCES! Or like... a line referencing what happned to the southern wardens after... y'unno... the whole betrayal thing last game? That's all chill?

Varric's plot twist was fucking stupid. See: this post.

The romance with Neve was sooo promising btu felt passionless towards the end. Maybe there are better choices but... the lack ofreal closure burns. No final kiss, just a wobbling "I love you" that sounded like it came after pulling teeth like... no passion for real?

Taash's nonbinary plotline sucked. I'm sorry. It did. As a nonbinary person I can say that.

Harding was so OOC it fucking hurt.

I chose her for the mandatory death because that wasn't my harding. It's absurd that that limited the mandatory death thing to two potential characters?

Larger casts are always hard but it feel slike they rly struggled to make all characters relevant to the main plot. Taash's mom/gender struggle could've been skipped. Emmrich was amazing but felt like he was a part of an entirely separate game. Bellara's archive plot felt close-ish to teh main plot of letting go of the past but the fact that you can choose to keep it going kinda... makes it less relevant. Idk.

Besides... Lucanis... and sometimes Bellara and sometimes Harding no one feels like they're reacting to the plot. The fact that a character can die but it's skimmed over after a scene and some chats is insane. The pacing is terribleeeee like oh I can watch Harding and Taash's terrible romance (I'll say it!! Harding acts liek a doting mom and NOT in a sexy way) in dialogue across several missions in the Lighthouse but we zoom past companions dying? THe world ending??

The world was beautiful BUT THE WORLD BUILDING SUCKED! Sorry but SOOO many locations make NO sense construction wise. Why is a chest in the middle of street? Why does this bridge only appear when I have a quest? It's hard to tell when an area is inaccessible because you haven't figured out how to get there vs you literally aren't allowed to go there yet. It makes the world feel more like Oh I'm playing a game rather than you're exploring a real place. They did not navigate inaccessible areas well as a concept.

CHARACTER MOTIVATION EQUALLY AS FUCKING MESSY! I still don't know what Elgar'nan/Ghilan'nain's plan rly was even though Ghilan'nain literally wails about them. They wanted to rule, they were blight addled so I guess they're insane, but... why did they have to do it this way? What were they gonna do as rules?

Solas wanted to tear the veil down ti imprison them even harder except tearing the veil down lets out the blight except letting them out of prison also lets out the blight and don't worry when he tears the veil down he'll imprison/kill them again and make sure the blight isn't too bad even tho the veil was the only thing keeping the blight in?? And oh haha killing them lets down the veil. Also, AFTER killing htem, the veil takes a while to be torn and actually stays in place long enough for Solas to feel bad and patch it up with his own essence... okay?

The Butcher Antaam dude looooves Treviso so he accepts the blight into his body to rule it but you have to fight him.. to prove you're worthy of keeping him... from destroying Treviso? He loves it and also wants it destroyed. Again, he's blighted so he's CRAAAZY but... what?

Even with Emmrich! He's scared of becoming immortal because he's a afraid of death. So you resolve that by either pressuring him to never die by being immortal... or by not letting his friend die? Huh? We conquer fear of death by just... not letting things die?What?

Not the same thing but why would dorian stay up in the north to become an archon if he romanced an inquisitor who is fighting for their life in teh soutH? again this continuity SUCKS

[disast3rtransp0rt]

Pride is About Normalization (and Hope)

Pride is radical. Pride began as a riot, where trans women of color fought back against invasive physical inspections by the NYPD. This would never have happened if trans people - who have ALWAYS existed, and to deny this fact is to fall for literal Nazi propaganda - were simply considered people like "everyone else".

If all queerness were normalized, we wouldn't be constantly fighting each other for pieces of an invisible, inaccessible pie. So to complain about "kink" or "leather" or "nudity" at Pride is to be on the side of the NYPD and the Nazis. And I'm not making false equivalence for dramatic effect, here. I cited my sources, and if you choose not to read them and keep your opinions rather than expand your education well... full offense, you're a bad fucking member of the queer community.

Do your homework and honor the people who have given you the right to feel comfortable coming out at all. Don't fall for puritanical, Evangelical cultural bullshit. That's what they want you to do. You're playing into their scheme perfectly and the only harm you're doing is to other queer people.

So, next year when you're at some silly Pride event and see a dude in a puppy mask and harness next to a 50+ guy with a huge beard and leather chaps and you want to get mad about how they might be scaring someone, remember how hard Leather fought to keep us safe during the early Pride movement. And also how maybe it's nobody's business to police anything at Pride. No matter how hard you try, you'll always be a freak to society. So we might as well protect our fellow freaks.

And this kind of intersectional normalization benefits EVERYONE. Pride has always worked to include topics like:

Gender or performances of gender.

Sexual orientation/attraction or lack thereof.

Body types.

Ethnicities and cultural practices outside the white Western binary (2-Spirit, Kathoey, Hijra, etc).

Disability rights/accessibility.

Bodily autonomy and medical accessibility.

Feminism, women's rights, and civil rights.

So, fellow queer people, I need you to get up on the soap box with me and start protecting each other. Advocate for each other. Care for each other. Intersectional solidarity is our superpower, but only IF we choose to use it and utilize it against those who wish us dead or silent.

To quote the band that both helped to awaken my bisexuality and turn me into a compassionate little freak on the streets, My Chemical Romance: "Can I be the only hope for you, because you're the only hope for me?"

[science-slapfight]

ROUND 3 POLL 1

7. Suspicious Stew (He/Him, Xe/Xem) @hilaomart

Stew is the reincarnation of a thief and swindler who died from poison. This untimely death leads him to an early interest in various poisons and their effects on the body. Fearing his own untimely death, xe begins to drink his experiments in small doses to give himself an immunity to the substances. His lack of basic lab safety led to an incident in which he lost his right eye, leaving a large chemical burn over the right side of his face. Other than this, for a while, he was relatively normal. After an incident with another mad scientist in which he was the unwilling subject, Stew began to lose himself in his work to cope. Xe branched out into the broader fields of biochemistry and potion magic, experimenting on himself to avoid putting anything else in the position he was once in. Xe got a job in a more normal lab to pay the bills, occasionally stealing equipment and materials from his job for his own home lab. He began to sell potions and poisons on the black market to fund his work.

Xeir hubris began to catch up to xem. One incident in his lab with a dangerous substance led to permanent damage to his body as well as the loss of his right arm. The various mutations he gave himself were slowly making him less and less human as his morals slipped away. He experimented with the art of creation, bringing abominations of flesh to life. Xe began to rob graves and steal corpses to experiment on. He was becoming what he feared the most, though xe didn’t have enough humanity left to care.

Stew is a strange little guy. He’s quite unnerving and dare I say, suspicious. He’s protective of those he cares for to a dangerous degree. Xes awkward, finding trouble in social interaction due to years of self isolation. He’s doomed by the narrative and only half aware of it. Besides his scientific endeavors, xe enjoys practical jokes, skateboarding, and the company of whatever family he has left.

Also he does like cupcakes <3

Relevant Links: https://toyhou.se/9067965.suspicious-stew

26. Angel Anide (She/Her) @x0majestea0x

Miss Anide is a 37yr old chemist who is very much not doing normal chemistry. In her early 20s, she lost a lover dear to her, and began spiralling after she failed to clone her. Now she's been trying to make a chemical that can bring people back from the dead and has taken many lives while doing so. And kill her boss while she's at it.

Her favourite experiment was on someone named Malley, who she successfully managed to get her boss's conscious into and get them out of her way. It was also the most interesting to watch.

You should vote for her because she's also a mother. The clone she failed to make ended up as her daughter and she loves Allay so much. She may be a little evil but she would never hurt a child. She has love in her heart even if it's violent.

Angel also loves cupcakes and would eat them in one go.

Ps. She has cybernetic tentacle limbs that come from her back! Cool!

Relevant Links: I'm sharing her human version because she has the most up to date art. Her toyhouse is not the most organized/up-to-date but theres a lot of images. WARNING FOR SOME NUDITY/SUGGESTIVE ART. Visibility depends on toyhouse settings !! https://toyhou.se/2035561.angelica-angel-anide/15610289.lancer

(Image credits: @hilaomart and @x0majestea0x, respectively)

[kxllerblond]

Clark always looks good in the suits he so meticulously tailors, but Nick would argue he looks better halfway out of them. The blond’s changing, getting into something different, which involves loosening the tie and undoing buttons on the dress shirt. A little flash of collarbone, that strong line moving beneath skin, is all it takes to drive Nick to madness.

“Need help with that?” It’s a very pointed question.

His body had never been something he took a great deal in hiding. It was a tool and he used it. Skin was skin, nudity didn't have much weight, so on and so forth. That, and it was much better to detach yourself from any importance of physical form when anyone with the capabilities could look at you and point out your lack of any actual personal features. When in actuality you look like someone attacked you with the Blur tool, it made it easy to not much care if you flashed a little skin or not.

Comfort played a role as well. What shame or hesitation did he have to worry about in the comfort of his own home and in the presence of someone he trusted? So, he'd wasted no time in beginning the arduous process of stripping out of his suit.

The tie had been discarded already by the time Nick spoke out-—neatly folded on the bedroom dresser to be put away afterwards. His hand had just withdrawn from it, pausing a beat or two before smiling to himself.

❝ Oh my god, is that really the set-up you're going with? ❞ his cuff buttons undone as he regarded Nick now, head cocked in that almost mischievous sort of way as he sized him up. ❝ I mean, here I thought I thrived on clichés and tropes and here you are spouting some line I'm pretty sure I just heard in some romcom I consumed the other day. ❞ it's only some light teasing, he'd never truly mock the other.

His hands had come to undo more buttons but fell away, arms spreading slightly in invitation. ❝ Should I pretend I don't know your intentions? Like: 'Oh, thank you so much. These buttons are just so difficult sometimes...' ❞

[70707070707o7]

idk the whole 'marilyn was so priv in her personal life she was saurr serious and was NOT flirty or FrEe~ at all!!! nobody irl could ever even dream of tryna get fresh w her' is deeply unserious esp bcs many xxfjs are like that and it's deeply unserious every single fucking time bcs it's so inconsistent n they simply lack the te to understand it is all the same it isn't one thing in situation a and another thing in situation b AND they lack the sufficient ti to figure out they'd be less clown like if they just were not trying to convince everyone this inconsistency was important and relevant and even necessary n then fail sooo collossally every single fucking time lol. i love marilyn but i am nude for work but a faux-prude irl bcs it doesn't count as nudity if it was necessary for work is soooo xsfj lmao. strippers etc are also always like this n i'm not even remotely talking abt trauma or involuntary situations i mean ppl who strip or like do all that dumbass online 'sex work' where they just sell pics of their tits or some shit and don't understand why someone wouldn't date them over it bcs 'it's just for work so it doesn't count?' lol. the low fi ones generally get mad/offended for example. they make it into a personal struggle and a BIG one at that if ppl don't wanna fuck. xxfjs are always like 'but it's not. Real?' HOW ?? T_T girl those are definitely your tits. for sure. or like the courtney love extreme politeness in some situations and trying to watch her language too much as if we didn't JUST see her be an absolute insane physical bully lol. oh but that was in front of ppl her age n this is like national tv w an older host or wtv. girl get REALLLL. 'i'm actually real niceyss except like in aggro situations' babe u just BEAT SOMEONE UP lmfaooo. they always try to cancel it out depending on the environment as if that matters like if u fuck all the time but don't behave 'like that' around ppl who r older or more 'respectable' or wtv that doesn't mean u don't fuck all the time it just means most people are normal and don't think certain behaviours should be carried into every situation.?? it means ur an idiot who thinks u can affect other ppl's view of u bcs u high fe believe that there ARE situations that call for certain behaviours and if u don't do smtg outside of those situations it doesn't even count AND that everyone agrees w u on what those situations r lmfao. Get Real

also they generally can't grasp that MOST ppl r like this. like if i'm a hoe but i don't share this w ppl i'm not close to and always care to dress more conservatively around ppl who r older then me, that means i'm a hoe and also a private person and have a specific value system about like the elderly or wtv. but to a high fe user this is impossible to grasp bcs they are sooooo hollistic abt shit that does NOT matter. 'oh it's not being a hoe if u only do it when ur being a hoe lol' girl WHEN ELSE WOULD U DO IT????????? omg. do u think ppl r hoeing out in front of their grandparents like when do u think it happens. side effects of genuinly believing there is singular truth to the human condition ig... they think everyone is 'like this' abt the dumbest shit exclusively kjhsadkajh. then they get mad when u say it doesn't matter if i saw ur tits when we were partying or if u flashed me randomly bcs 1. normal ppl don't just flash others and No, it was not something that the 'party calls for' that's dumb as hell. but also 2. YOU showed me?????? do u understand u have Choices like it is not just do what the environment calls u to do. fucking weirdo. they unironically think showing tits doesn't count if it was a Showing Tits Moment. what does that even MEAN

[swimmingferret]

Have read your new chapter on skinned hearts and i got to tell you i can’t imagine these two dorks having sexz loll dksmdm they are so awkward i literally can’t see them doing the deed. Maybe if a third party (a spell) was involved, like an accidental hit of aphrodisiacs or something.

Anyways as always that was a good read. Especially liked when vergil smashed down a 300 something years old violin to pieces. I feel the urge to do the same thing when I can’t get back to be good at something I was once good at

WELL personally I can see Red being way more forward when she realizes she does in fact feel attraction towards him. At the moment she just doesn't actually know the difference between friendship and romance. Like when she was 'well how do I know I'm attracted to Vergil? I think Effie and Marv are both attractive in their own ways' since comparing your crush to a geriatric old lady and a dude with a literal skull for a head is normal

but yea I see her as being a lot more sex positive and less defensive over it, just due to being raised in Hell and having zero privacy so there's a lack of 'this topic is taboo/uncomfortable'. demons don't have a sense of modesty, it's why nudity doesn't bother her at all and sex won't either, it's just something she doesn't really think about since i'm kinda projecting my ace-ness onto her as i feel zero sexual attraction to anyone lmao. I'm not having any dub-con about it tho, it'll be fully consensual since both of them have had enough bad shit already without adding sexual violation/coercion on top of their baggage.

the day after breaking the stradivarius Vergil would be all 'why TF did I do that completely unnecessary behaviour >:(' and be mad he doesn't have perfect control of his unaddressed trauma

legit just

just remove the 'quietly' part cause dude destroyed two cities due to trying to soldier through it lol

[choshasan]

Hear Me Out

Grownass Adults watching a show aimed at teenage boys and then complaing that it made them uncomfortable that the teenage characters were "sexualised" (certain more skimpy outfits, some sex jokes, one perverted **teenage** character, Some **ARTISTIC** Nudity to represent the character as being "layed bare and raw and as honestly open as can be", and one character being nude and still remaining always covered and her nudity, while having some plot holes in comparison to other characters, being "logical" in the contect of the story)

Is very similar in nature to a grownass adult watching the fucking Backyardigains and saying it "lacks intellectual dept".

Like, yeah, no shit you don't like it, It **WASN'T AIMED AT YOU**.

Amd the fucking hypocrity to go and post about conetent you dislike and getting payed over stupidly hating on a show that just wasn't meant for you. You're not a critique, you're just some idiot with an access to social media and, sadly for all, the right to free-speech.

Like, I'll never say people shouldn't have free-speech,

But free-speech to the level we have nowdays is not *deserved* by everyone,

Hell, I don't qualify as someone who should have as much free-speech as I do,

like, yeah, I should be allowed to say wtv tf I want with my friends and family, at home, through DMs,

But I should NOT be allowed to be expressing opinions like I do on the internet

I should even less be capable of making money from it (which I'm not)

I am in no way educated, and somehow, I can be saying whatever bullshit I want online??, to the entire world??, with near-full anonimity??? Mind. Fucking. Blowing. This should not be.

I should have to be way more educated than I am to publicly broadcast my thoughts and opinions,

And yeah, I'm probably, without realising it, accidentally saying that some medieval-time stuff that was entirely wrong should be applied nowdays, but understand, that's not what I'm trynna say.

I'm just saying, it's mind blowing that we get this ammount of free speech and this is the bullshit we do with it..

Anyway, I'm mostly just mad cuz I, once again, saw people hating on my idol/Sensei so.. ye ✨️ more complaining from me ✨️

I'm also extremely sleep deprived ✨️✨️

My brain feels like burnt scrambled eggs ✨️

[the-cat-chat]

June 1, 2024

Anyone But You (2023)

Despite having an amazing first date, Bea and Ben's initial attraction quickly turns sour. When they unexpectedly find themselves at a destination wedding in Australia, the pair pretend to be the perfect couple to keep up appearances.

Warning: Review may contain spoilers. Read at your own risk.

JayBell: This movie does have some of my most hated romance tropes. Miscommunication, lack of communication (this is different from miscommunication, trust me), and fake dating of course. About ten minutes into the movie and I knew I wasn't going to be having a good time. But we persevered.

Where to begin. I think both these characters are way too immature to be in a relationship at all. Their immaturity and lack of ability to make adult choices and have adult conversations astounds me. Although they end up together in the end, if this was real life, I bet they wouldn't last two years before ending in a messy break up. Also, I just don't like the main characters, separately or together. I can honestly say I wasn't rooting for them. I think Jonathan is the only character I really liked, but that's maybe because he's hardly in it and didn't irritate me.

The way the time jump is handled is crazy. There is no chemistry between the parents (who are AWFUL) and their kids, no chemistry between the sisters or the friends either. I know the plot is based off of Shakespeare, but man is it stupid in this modern setting. The dialogue isn't the greatest, the emotional moments aren't very emotional. And the ending is stupid. I don't even want to talk about the helicopter.

What bothers me most is that it isn't funny. The airplane bit, the spider bit on the cliff (who wrote that?), the dialogue, the side characters, etc. And I guess the "raunchy" nudity is supposed to be funny too? But honestly if feels out of place and just strange.

It's a shame. I almost want to say, "I'm not mad, just disappointed." But I have to be honest and say that I am a little mad too.

Rating: 2/10 cats 🐈‍

Anzie: The main two things to take away from this - 1. I’m so sorry. I am sorry I made The Cat Chat watch it, I almost wouldn’t blame anyone (*cough JayBell* cough cough*) from disowning me over this pick. And 2. This past week- I have repressed this movie almost as good if not better than my collection of lifetime traumas. And there’s a lot of that to repress and I’m not particularly good at that, so repressing this movie into the deepest part of my psyche very easily is telling.

I hate all of it. Minutes in I was wanting to stop- but we’ve seen awful movies before right? RiGhT?? No not until this one. If anyone ever asks me worst movie ever. It’s this one. And poor Sydney Sweeny. Bc I love her. And she should not carry this mark forever. And I just hate all the crude humor bc it’s not even funny it’s just at the expense of the actors/ characters and it doesn’t ADD AnYThiNgg in fact it takes it down more. Don’t get me started on the spider scene.

Honorable mentions of just what the actual fluff-

The whole beginning- in the coffee shop - we'll glaze over - but just ending up with the random man that pretended he was your husband so you could pee in the bathroom and it’s customers only blah blah blah- that’s how you end up on dateline. And her leaving and him saying that stuff to his friend??? And the completely absurd fact that we get no reference for the time jumps until the MOvIE is OVeRr!!! And her parents inviting the ex bf. and the dog?? And the cake?? And every character in this and the dialogue STABBbBB meeee to death now. I’m sure Shakespeare is rolling in his grave and I’m sure in all of time in space is it the most HEINOUS version of any of his work.

Ohhh and don’t let me forget about Will Gluck the Mastermind. Oh I’m sorry I misspoke. Will Gluck the Absolute SINNER!!! And what’s with the fact that he’s made Easy A and Peter Rabbit 1 & 2. That’s weird. And what’s weirder his affinity to use Pocketful of Sunshine in Easy A and then tarnish Unwritten with this piece of garbage. How Dare Heeeeee.

Rating: -10/10 Cats 🐈‍⬛

[romanoffsbish]

The Other Side of the Door

Yelena Belova x Fem!Reader

Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader (Besties)

Sad Beautiful Tragic (MW x Taylor Swift Series)

TW: Perceivable cheating, Lack of proper communication, Gaslighting, Non-Sexual nudity, Non-Consensual advances/touching

Angst with an open ending. | 3,906 Words

Yelena was tired, like genuinely exhausted after the month she'd just had, full of nonstop missions with her sister. Tonight, all she'd wanted was to enjoy a night out with her girlfriend and accompanying friends. Instead, she had an hour of blissful conversations over a delicious meal before it all went to shit. Her dearest friend—Kate Bishop, decided to laugh far too loudly at her joke, and place her hand on her chest for longer than necessary.

"Y/N! I'm allowed to spend time with my friends!" Yelena groans as you both enter her apartment, her patience with this repetitive argument now wearing thin.

"Yeah, Yelena, you are, but not when said friends are literally undressing you with their eyes. Literally getting handsy right in front of me, and to be honest you didn't seem to really mind it at all!"

———

"Y/N, I love you, you're the one I choose to come home to."

A loud scoff falls from your lips as you can't find it within yourself to hold back anymore.

"You've been back from your week long mission for less than five hours Yelena, and instantly you were planning a night out for us. Not to mention, inviting the girls who are clearly infatuated with you. All I've wanted was to cuddle up with you and Fanny."

"Jesus Y/N, how many times do I have to tell you that you're all that I want before you believe me!"

"Maybe when you do something that lets everyone else around you know that too!"

A tense silence falls around the both of you, Yelena's gaze is glued to the ground, and her lips are clamped shut.

"You know what, I've had enough Yelena, you're just disregarding my valid concerns, attempting to placate me with baseless phrases of affirmation, but you know actions speak louder than words Yelena, I'm going home!"

"Detka, please don't leave, we can still work this out..." She dejectedly whispers, attempting to grab at your arm, but you manage to slip right passed her.

You stood outside of her apartment door, anxiously anticipating her to run after you, to wrap you up in her strong arms and show you just how much she really does want you.

After ten minutes though, you'd officially lost hope and instead chose to walk home. Paying no mind to the incessant pinging of your phone, or the torrential downpour that had been soaking you through your clothes.

—————————————————————

In the heat of the fight I walked away

Ignoring words that you were saying

Trying to make me stay

I said, "This time I've had enough."

And you've called a hundred times

But I'm not picking up

'Cause I'm so mad I might tell you that it's over

—————————————————————

Going home had been the original plan, but then you worried she'd show up there, you weren't necessarily ready for that so you instead settled for the bar.

Johnny saw you walking in, and had immediately began to pour out a set of shots for you, having been through this with you many times before. A silent nod of appreciation is thrown his way before you throw the collection back, then make your way to the restroom to assess the damage.

The people of the bar expecting to have access to the all inclusive single stall would just have to wait. You crouched, careful not to allow your clothing to drag across the floor of the bar's restroom, while allowing the hand dryer to at least lessen the dampness of your locks.

Once satisfied enough you took a good look in the mirror, wincing at the returned reflection, before fixing your outfit, and reapplying your products in an attempt to hide your clear misery.

You pulled your phone out to find out that she'd gotten Natasha involved, and that just pissed you off further. Nothing could ever just remain between you two, it's as if dealing with you alone was too much of a hardship. Messages and voicemails were left ignored, and it seems she'd given up about twenty minutes ago, so now your phone was dauntingly silent.

"Why so glum my old chum?"

You groan at the familiar voice, looking up to see the long line of people outside the door, and your redheaded best friend staring at you with a comforting smile.

"Your sister is an idiot, and by the sounds of it, so are you." You grumble as you push right passed her and make your way back to the bar.

"Hey... I thought I was being kind of cute... Also yeah—she is, but you knew that when you got with her." She teases, then orders two old fashioned's and settles her hand on your back for comfort while you wallow in your own pity with your face on the bar.

Natasha sips upon her drink, cringing lightly at your choices to place your face on such an unclean surface, but just this once she chooses not to scold you. Instead she listens to you complaining about her little sister, and her odd ways.

"It's just, she tries to make me think I'm crazy, but I know crazy—that's not what this is at all. Kate Bishop, and Ivanka are literally infatuated with her and she just tells me I'm over exaggerating the matter."

"Typical deflecting, it's what we were trained to do. Also, Y/N/N, you have to remember she's not great with context clues when it comes to the heart. Remember how long it took for her to see that you wanted her? Or to even acknowledge that she'd wanted you?"

"Not an excuse Nat. Kate laughs at all of her jokes, especially the unfunny ones, and she's always got her hands all over her. Ivanka's even less subtle, going as far as sitting on her lap and kissing her cheek. Yelena might be clueless when it comes to affairs of the hearts, but she's not that fucking dumb."

"Yeah, I honestly have no defense for that Y/N, but maybe you should just sleep it off, then try and talk it out tomorrow?" She suggests with a pity smile.

"I'm tired of talking..." You sigh, lifting your glass to your lips and Nat's eyes nearly bulge out of her head when you uncharacteristically down the drink in one gulp without so much as a wince.

Natasha's phone was nonstop buzzing so she'd excused herself to handle her business, leaving you to mope at the bar. The alcohol in your system was making you exceptionally sad, so naturally you pulled your phone out to reminisce. Tears caught in your eyelashes as you stumbled upon photos from when everything between you and Lena had been picture perfect.

When the love she had for you burnt brighter than the sun, and nobody could come between the two of you. The adoration was clear in her eyes, but now her eyes just seem dull, as if you're more like an obligation to her than anything else. Natasha stood behind you silently, agitation for her sister only intensifying as she hears your sniffles, and now begins to form for Steve for pulling her away from you for an impromptu mission.

"I remember that day." She muses, as she hugs you from behind and places her chin atop your shoulder to peer down at the photo.

It was one she took of you asleep on the couch at the compound, she'd left you alone while going to a scheduled meeting with Fury. When she'd returned she found you peacefully asleep, which wasn't shocking because you would sleep just about anywhere. What surprised her was finding Yelena sleeping on top of you, with her face smushed against your bare abdomen where your shirt had ridden up.

"Yeah, you mean when you mercilessly teased Yelena until her face was practically the same shade as your hair?" You laugh out while reminiscing about the good old days.

"Funny to think that she was still very much unaware of her own feelings for you."

A simple silence falls between you two as you continue to scroll through your photos, resulting in the occasional awe to fall from Natasha whenever she sees a photo of the both of you, or you with Wanda—her girlfriend.

"You have to go right?" You knowingly sigh, suddenly breaking through your comfortable bubble of silence, and Natasha groans, lightly digging her chin into your shoulder as she confirms your statement with a nod.

"Yeah, I was supposed to leave immediately, but I like to live on the edge." She jests, and you genuinely chuckle at your little rebel.

"That and you don't like being told what to do."

"Exactly... This is why you're my best friend."

...

"Now, don't stay out too late, and call Happy for a ride home, stay safe dorogoy." She instructs, slightly shaking your body by the grip she has on your shoulders.

"Yes mom..." You playfully groan out, turning to her with a small smile, and Natasha's nervous heart settles at the sight of your slightly improved mood.

Alone again...

Your fractured heart continues to ache the longer you sit there at the bar, wondering if Yelena would ever show up for you herself. Eventually all seals require breaking, so you slipped off to the restroom, and in doing so missed the collection of women entering the establishment.

—————————————————————

Me and my stupid pride are sitting here alone

Going through the photographs, staring at the phone. I keep going back over things we both said, and I remember the slamming door and all the things that I misread.

So babe if you know everything, tell me why you couldn't see, that when I left I wanted you to chase after me.

—————————————————————

Yelena had paced the length of her apartment trying to get you to answer her, anxiety consumed her entirely when the weather turned torrential. In an honest fit of pure desperation she contacted her sister, who had been your best friend since far before your relationship with her. Natasha scolded her, then told her that she'd find you, and the stress of your safety was instantly gone.

Left with the remaining ache from your fight ironically led her to contacting the sources of your tension. Kate and Ivanka agreed almost instantly to meet her at the bar, so she'd taken to changing into something far more casual then set off for a night of disassociating.

Once she reached the pub her friends were already stood there with wide smiles on their faces. Instantly they pulled her to the bar for shots, and Yelena's heart skipped when she caught wind of your familiar scent.

"What's Y/N's problem again?" Kate shouts over the booming music, as she sips from her mixed drink and stares into the blondes eyes.

Yelena cringes internally at the slight disdain in her tone when referencing you, but she chooses to overlook it as her friend just supporting her.

"She picked another fight with me over me spending time with you two, she's insecure, and mistakenly thinks you guys want me."

"What a fucking bitch, you should dump her Lena. Clearly she's making you miserable." Ivanka confidently exclaims, while throwing her arms up in the air along to the beat before slyly dropping them down to Yelena's waist.

Yelena's honestly never felt a rage like the one she felt right now at the words that fell from her supposed best friends mouth. They know just how much she loves you, and to think calling you a bitch was okay was bad enough, but to then encourage her leave you over something so small was beyond her. Before she could come to your defense the grip on her hips tightened and she found herself silenced as she was pulled against the black haired woman.

As you exited the bathroom you decided to take Nat's advice, so you returned to the bar to drink some water and then close out your tab. However, you were not expecting to be met with Johnny's nervous smile; following the trajectory of where his eyes had just been moments prior, you stood frozen in place.

There stood your girlfriend, lips locked with Ivanka in what appeared to be an intense kiss, and she hadn't looked to be pushing her away. Your heart stopped beating, you're absolutely certain it genuinely stuttered in your chest for at least five seconds, and the sound of shattering glass brought you back.

Your heart fluttered painfully, but the ache in your hand suddenly took precedence when you felt a towel pressing firmly against your hand, and then you noticed the glass and blood.

"Ow.." You weakly mumbled, and dropped your gaze as a new wave of tears began to trail down your cheeks.

Yelena was completely thrown by the initial contact, truthfully—she was disgusted; her reactions were severely lacking though due to her inebriated state. An immense wave of guilt coursed through her as your supposed insecurities were clearly based in truths.

She'd gasped when Ivanka's hands lowered, and the woman thought that she should deepen the kiss. Yelena had an immediate bitter taste in her mouth, and she went to shove the woman off of her at the same time that a loud crash pulled her from her daze.

She went to shout at her, possibly even punch her, but her attention was pulled away as she peered over her shoulder and was met with the sight of your trembling form at the bar. You could feel her stare on you, so you decided to let her see the pain she was causing you by locking gazes. Then it became too much and you quickly ran out of the bar in search of your chariot, as if it would turn into a pumpkin by the strike of midnight.

"Chertov ad." She groaned under her breath, then aggressively shoved passed the obliviously giddy woman before her to attempt to intercept you from leaving.

(Fucking hell...)

Kate was honestly stunned—sure, she had a crush on Yelena, and maybe it was obvious. The difference though is that she would never cross such a boundary, because she actually valued her friendship with the blonde assassin. Truth be told, she also didn't hate you, she just mostly envied you for meeting the blonde first.

You're noticeably shaking from the influx of overwhelming emotions consuming you as you attempt to look all around for Happy. Intentions proving rather fruitless as your vision is clouded with tears, your shaking increasing tenfold under the downpour that apparently means to drench you for the second time tonight.

Yelena was usually quick on her feet, but the alcohol's effects, mixing with her terrifying emotions slowed her down. Then she was met with the nearly pitch black streets as the storm was muffling the street lights effects. The slamming of a car door shifts her desperate gaze down the street and she runs when she sees the familiar Rolls Royce Phantom.

Happy notices her, standing guard by your door to prevent her from getting the chance to reach you. He'd just stood there with you under the harsh rain until he'd been able to calm your ragged breathing down just enough to feel you were safe enough to drive home.

Yelena quite literally shoved him out of the way without a care in the world though, obviously still having her strength and dexterity above all else.

"Y/N! Detka! Open up! Please, it's not what it looks like..." She pleads through her sobs, while hammering her fists against the window, and cringing at the cliché statement.

"GO AWAY! I can't even look at you Yelena!"

"Please... I-I, I need to talk to you, to explain, because I promise it's not what it seems.”

“There's nothing you can say to make this right again! I mean it, just fucking leave me alone!”

"No! Don't say that! I'm in love with you Y/N! Only you! Please, just hear me out... I’m not willing to lose you, so I’m not leaving, I’ll never leave… Detka, I can’t do this without you…" She shrieks, voice cracking the entire time, while she has to simultaneously gasp between words.

The obvious desperation in her voice made your heart ache with an almost natural need to comfort her, so, against your better judgment you opened the door, and shimmied over so she could climb in, then Happy begrudgingly drove you both back to her place.

—————————————————————

And I'll scream out the window

"I can't even look at you!"

I don't need you but I do, I do, I do

I say, "There's nothing you can say to make this right again! I mean it, I mean it."

What I mean is I said, "Leave," but baby all I want is you

To stand outside my window throwing pebbles

Screaming, "I'm in love with you."

Wait there in the pouring rain, come back for more, and don't you leave 'cause I know:

All I need is on the other side of the door

—————————————————————

The ride was silent, as you kept your eyes focused on the passing buildings, and Yelena's body never ceased in its sobbing. When the car finally came to a stop outside of her place your emotions were no longer containable as the entirety of the night flashes before your eyes.

Happy kindly opened the door for you, and you honestly would’ve crumbled to the floor had he not caught you. Yelena pulled herself together just long enough to scoop you up and carry your sobbing form in through her doors.

Once you’d made it through she sat down on the couch, and the two of you sat there surrounded by the sounds of each other’s unsteady breathing, and honestly, if you’d listened close enough I’m sure you’d be able to hear the hearts breaking.

After about ten minutes your mind finally returned to you, and Yelena’s sobs only increased as you recoiled from her touch by jumping to your feet and creating distance between the two of you. Yelena jumped to her feet and immediately stumbled towards you until she had you backed against her door.

“Detka… You have to believe me, please.” She whimpers, as she reaches out to cup your face, sighing gratefully as you don’t recoil this time.

Truthfully you do believe her, but that changes nothing. The problem is the unwanted kiss never would’ve happened had she just listened to you. Had she stopped dismissing you, taking in the obvious signs, then these tears would’ve never fallen, and both your hearts would be intact. Completely lost in your thoughts you failed to see the way her booze clouded gaze fell to your lips, nor did you seem to notice her leaning in, but as soon as her lips touched yours it was over for you, as her taste was currently tainted.

"No! Don't, God, I can taste her on your lips." You spat, while attempting to choke down the rising bile as you forcefully shove her back.

Yelena nearly trips at the sheer force in which you push her off of you, then she hurls into the trash can at your words. Body crumbling to the floor in a fit of sobs, with the despair written all over her face, and visible through her body language. Your love for her overrules the logic telling you to keep your distance in your brain and you take a shaky step towards her in an attempt to extend an olive branch of sorts.

Yelena shimmies over to you on her knees, desperate to have you close, as she wraps her arms around you from the front, linking her hands upon your lower back and clings to you.

"I'm so sorry I didn't believe you..." She sobs against your abdomen, and if you weren't already drenched you're sure you'd be able to feel her hot tears soaking through.

"I know..."

"I didn't want to kiss her, I swear it..."

You hum in response, not having any words for her in the moment, pretty much urging her to continue on.

"The alcohol messed with me Y/N/N, I couldn't fucking move, it was like I was frozen in place. Once she shoved her tongue down my throat it finally registered in my mind what was happening. I hated it so much... I’d never cheat on you. You’re the absolute love of my life. Please forgive me..."

You continue to say nothing, but your hand settling on her head is enough for her in the moment to know that your love for her remains.

“I made you think you were crazy, because I actually thought you were being it. I’d never noticed their advances because honestly I didn’t see anyone but you. I know that sounds like a cheesy attempt to seek forgiveness but it’s not. It’s my truth Y/N, you’re the first person I’ve ever loved like this, and I’m set on making you my last.”

Her head turns as she settles her chin against your abdomen and cranes her neck so that she can peer up at you. Glossy eyes full of love, despair, and hurt meet, and for just a moment it’s like everything stills for them.

“Please, forgive me…” She pleads once more, and you can see that distant look in her eyes; as if she’s one second away from shutting down, so you say the words you know she needs to hear, even if you don’t fully mean them yet.

“I forgive you…” You whisper, while using the pads of your thumbs to wipe away at her tears that settled upon her cheeks.

Yelena jumps up on shaky legs and catapults herself into your embrace. Yelena’s only ever been like this once before—when Natasha had been severely injured, and the aftermath of it all was terrifying. Having to fight to bring her back out of those dark places in her mind was tedious, and required a lot of patience, that with which you have none of currently. Something you’ve noticed over the years, that tends to help to calm her, was skin to skin contact.

You began slowly working on removing both of your wet clothes while still holding her firmly against you. On e you’d finished stripping the both of you, you then took her to the restroom to handle the bare minimum of your hygiene routines before finally settling the both of you down in her bed. Taking your rightful place in the center, as Yelena grabbed the duvet, then silently crawled on top of you, bringing the cover with her.

—————————————————————

With your face and the beautiful eyes

And the conversation with the little white lies

And the faded picture of a beautiful night

You carried me from your car up the stairs

And I broke down crying, was she worth this mess?

After everything and that little black dress

After everything I must confess, I need you.

—————————————————————

Her content sigh tells you that your preventative plan is somewhat working, which you’re truly grateful for, because you’re not entirely sure what tomorrow will bring. There was still so much left to be said, and in turn to unpack, but for tonight the blonde needed to rest, and you needed the silence to think.

You’re not entirely sure love is enough, and you’re wondering if your happiness instead lies on the other side of the door.

——————————————————

[celestemona]

Imagine Scaramouche trying to comfort the reader because she’s insecure of her body after having Kimi, he obviously doesn’t understand why she’s so Upset which leads to him getting mad because he doesn’t know how to comfort her 😩

very well, dear anony!

warning: angst, hurt with no comfort, post childbirth, mentions of breastfeeding, mentions of female-bodied, swearing, body insecurity, nudity, maybe misspeling and grammar.

[...]

it’s been a month since you gave birth to kimi and you couldn’t be happier. not only did your baby came healthy into the world but your husband took some days off from job to be with you and he seemed to be warming to your daughter too.

one thing though that always seemed to be occupying your mind — when it wasn’t the concern of a first-time mother with breastfeeding, diaper change, sleep and etc — it was your body. you just couldn't get used to the vision of the new version of yourself and it frustrated you.

it frustrated you mainly because it was this body that brought your beloved daughter into the world; this body that you were born in, this body that your husband left oaths and marks of his love for you. but you wondered every time you looked in the mirror why it was so difficult to accept this new yourself.

then, one night, your insecurities seemed to get worsened.

you had just breastfed kimi and not only your swollen breasts hurt but your whole body seemed overloaded with exhaustion. scaramouche realizing this, volunteered to put the baby to sleep so you could get some rest.

just when you thought it would be an opportunity to relax in the bath, you once again found yourself looking at your naked body in the mirror.

what the reflection showed was a tired and worn-out mother. you had dark circles under your eyes denouncing sleepless nights; your skin was paler than would be considered healthy, and the stretch marks that covered your breasts and belly looked more and more remarkable. you didn't feel like and happy about yourself and that was clear to your husband who was watching you from the bathroom door with a frown.

"what's the matter, (y/n)?" scaramouche asked, showing behind, scaring you. you quickly covered yourself with the robe to block him from the view of your body.

"is nothing."

"cut that shit", he sharpened his eyes in your direction, "i know something's been bothering you for a while."

"it's nothing you need to worry about, scara", you sigh, "that said, can you leave now? i want to bathe alone."

"not until we figure out what the hell is wrong with you."

"fucking hell scaramouche! can't you see i want to take a fucking bath and be alone?"

"no, because you don't tell me what's bothering you when something is clearly bothering you!"

and that was the last straw for the thick tears to start running down your face.

"it's all wrong, that's the fucking problem! i can't sleep, i can't eat, i can't sit on my fucking couch for five minutes to rest without having to check if kimi is in her crib breathing. my boobs are constantly hurting, my head feels like it's about to explode and worst of all i'm not feeling like myself!"

"what the hell are you talking about? you look normal to me"

you took a deep breath and untied the cord of your robe letting your naked view of yourself be in view of your husband.

"but that doesn't look normal to me," you said as you point to the stretch marks on your body.

once you were intimidated by the purple irises that once stared at you with such boredom but gradually came to admire you with love. however, as you finally showed your body and soul to your husband, finally showing that part of yourself that felt strange, broken, defective… you couldn't help but feel disappointed at the lack of empathy coming from him.

"i don't see anything wrong, you look normal to me and you're making a fucking fuss for nothing."

and once again that night, the tears took over and the sob broke like a silent scream from your throat. scaramouche tried again to understand what was wrong and tried to reach you, but with a push, he was locked out of the bathroom, only being able to hear your agonizing cries as he scolded himself for his poisonous tongue.

"shit."

[gangrenados]

Bath time

Warnings: uh nudity and the hints of sexy time.

Is this why you folks call slow burn? Idk I'm new with those terms. Also this is my first blurb after a long time, don't go hard on me pls 👉🏽👈🏽

Jason shifted awkwardly in his seat, making sure to not disturb you by putting his calloused hands on your bare waist as he tried to stretch his back.

The edge of the bathtub was putting pressure in his sore lower back and it was less to say that it was driving him crazy.

It was the same with his half numbed legs that were basically constricted between those small, white marmol walls and you. Yeah you, the person who was leaned back against Jason bruised, gracing the mass of bubbles that surrounded you two and played with it by making strange figures on your skin.

You were pretty sure you were being subtle about it, but Jason catched you giggling when you accidentally blowed a bubble from your mouth, also it was pretty noticeable when you were picking up soap to try it again.

All of this was because of you, you were the one who set up a nice bath for him since you were aware of how much his muscles must ache after coming home from a long mission. You wanted to pamper him just a little, and give some of the love he has been lacking from years.

This was just for him, but Jason was the who begged or you to get in that bathtub with him.

He craved the intimacy of feeling your naked body against his, the warmth and how nice it made him feel. At first his mind rushed with hot scenarios that has been repressed in the back of his head, but he was too sore to move and being here was enough to fill his need for attention and care.

"You good, baby?" your sweet voice took him out of his thoughts, he blinked slowly and realized that your wet hand was caressing his forearm.

"Uh, yeah. I'm fine" he answered groggily, chest rising up and going back down slowly as he wrapped his arms around your waist.

He press his head against your shoulder blade and kisses it tenderly; his fingers are doing lazy patterns in your belly before you interlace them with yours. Jason can't shake the feeling of unreality this whole situation holds.

Why is this so perfect? The "J" scarred in his cheek burns at the memory of everything he had to go through, and now he's more conscious about the fact that his body is exposed and you can see how damaged it is.

Every scar is burning and Jason is being dragged down by the thought of you deserves much more than the life he can offer you.

"I love you, doll" he says as he trails a path of kisses from your shoulder to your neck.

"I love you too, Jay" your words burns deeply in his brain, he swear his heart melts every time those words come out of your mouth.

It's painful though, he is a wounded man with a tragic past looking for something to make life worth living.

You shouldn't be hold to such high expectations, but Jason can't help it.

Your moan is music to his ears and just makes him eager to slow down a hand between your tights as the other goes to grab your breast. He's failure who seeks for a savior and you just happen to be that.

Jason is aware that he doesn't deserve you, but maybe he plays well his cards and makes you see the good things he has, just maybe you'll be happy to set up with a person like Jason Todd.

"please don't leave me" he murmurs, a cry for hel that goes unnoticed by the low tone of his voice and his need to make you feel good in order to make himself feel useful.

Tag list: @burningclodwagonjudge @meany-marcelini @alice-fell-down-the-well @demondoxable @fluffyshrimpuwu @mad-grace-amber @screechingghostbananafarm @owl-witch-prompts @waroncheer @nervousfandom @winged-j @astroherogirl @omgtheywereroommates98 @redarsenal @shadygoateeprincess @lovelyartemisa @missmaskedwriter @thegirlwholovesbooksblog @silverw19 @simpery @unknowntoanyone @ghost-bich @lucy-roo @adarksoul098 @magicisabluewish @kellieriddle96 @ashyvillain @panic-attheplace @greeknerd007 @honeydolly @perylinsus @cedrics-things @just-deka @malfoys-demigod @aterriblelangblr @hamdehlesmis @dreamxcollide @thirstiestpotato @magicalbeanie @letlly

[kingsofchaos]

So in the new Asset Seizure video, the boys do a car heist basically wearing nothing and it's incredible. I'm feeling like the FAHC would absolutely do the same thing. Maybe a dare from Funhaus?

Listen, while i love that thought and could absolutely see it being Funhaus, the fact that they’re wearing awful cowboy hats makes me think of a different culprit.. Jeremy, who was so excited about the huge destruction truck they were going to steal, who’d been talking all week about how wicked it looked, how much devastation they would cause, whether or not it could flip his monster truck in a joust. Jeremy who let Gavin and Michael goad him into some stupid dare, who got hurt last second, who’s laid up in bed, knowing the job is too time-sensitive to delay until he’s better. Who tells them all to go ahead, take Ryan in his place, so disgustingly understanding despite his disappointment that they can’t help but feel guilty. Can’t shake it off like they would if he’d been selfish, can’t mock him like they would if he’d been mad, even Jack and Ryan feel bad and they weren’t remotely involved in the accident for gods sake. So when Gavin pitches an idea out of desperation, suggests that since Jeremy can’t come along he can instead play boss, be the voice in their ear, the shot caller, the others are all too eager to agree. Can’t see the harm, even after Jeremy jumps on the idea, almost as excited as he’d been about the truck in the first place. As though history has taught them nothing they don’t see Jeremy’s revenge coming until it’s too late, failed to even consider the danger in the way Jeremy immediately declared that there would be a dress code, that costumes would be provided.  It’s not until Trevor and Matt get back from running about doing Jeremy’s shopping and can’t stop laughing that the mood begins to sour. Geoff almost chokes to death laughing when Jeremy produces Gavin and Michaels costumes, or lack thereof. Stripped down to silly boxers and bowties like impromptu Chippendale dancers, garnished by a couple of the dozen ludicrous novelty cowboy hats and boots Jeremy is gifted with at every turn, team nice dynamite have never looked quite so unprepared for a heist. Still, true to their word, they resign themselves and quickly start to enjoy the ridiculousness of the whole ordeal; Gavin is legitimately more upset about the crime against fashion than he is the nudity, Michael struts around constantly flexing, and the pair can’t stop striking preposterous imitations of suggestive poses. Ryan watches this all go down in silence before turning to Jeremy and reminding him that he was a last second stand in and would be happy to tag out for Geoff. Which lasts all of five seconds after Jeremy reveals Ryan’s costume; the absurd silk and velvet playboy affair barely makes it out of the bag before Ryan starts pulling it on, slapping away Geoff’s grabby hands and declaring that the Lads are now his arguably classless arm-candy. Jeremy, being a smart man, tells Jack she can wear whatever she likes. Jack, being Jack, rolls her eyes and declares that if they are doing this they are doing it right, go hard or go home, picks out a hat and goes to sort out her own flashy costume for the world’s most inexplicably underdressed grand theft auto. 

[m0th-punk]

This is something that's been on my mind for a long time. Long ramble under the cut

TL;DR: Grazer-razor has some of the worst black and white mentality I've ever seen and I can tell he has never critically examined his biases a day in his life.

Because I'm a terrible little gremlin who can't leave well enough alone, I've been reading these posts

Ignoring the absolute stupidity of these statements (I'm pretty sure the lack of rainbow logos is because in many middle eastern countries, homosexuality is a crime and these companies just want to make money. But I'mnot going into the nuances and implications of rainbow capitalism today.), something stood out to me.

Does Grazer... genuinely think nobody has ever criticized the Muslim faith? That we all ignore the homophobia present within the religion just because they're a minority? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I've seen even some of the most staunch leftists criticize things like their horrible treatment of homosexuality or the rampant sexism often sanctioned by radicals. Even other Muslims, especially women and lgbt+ Muslims, have been critical of these things.

It wouldn't shock me if Grazer believedthat anyone who supports Muslims believes they can do no wrong. After all, he thinks any criticism of Christianity is hatred, and dismisses any harmful things Christians do as not being "real" Christianity in a classic case of the "No True Scotsman" fallacy.

Note how he didn't even respond to the first asks comments, just accused them of being me (because obviously any time someone sees his blog it's all my fault /s)

So it seems like in Grazer's mind, there are only two options when it comes to religion: Uncritically praise and defend everything a religion does no matter how heinous it is and justify it because it's done in a God's name, or condemn anyone who practices it as hateful terrorists. Because he doesn't see people doing the former for Christians, he automatically assumes that they're doing the latter, and vice versa for Muslims.

Also note how he gets mad when muslim faith is "respected" (again, homosexuality is criminalized in many of these areas) but then demands a secular children's show cater to his religion for the sake of his precious childhood.

(Also, can we just talk about the absolute fucking cruelty in this answer? There are people out there that had their childhoods ruined by abuse, illness, losing loved ones, homelessness, poverty, bullying, near-death experiences, having their countries torn apart by war, a shitty foster care system, teen pregnancies, and so many other things that can absolutely destroy a life.  Grazer's was ruined by…  *checks notes* a cartoon character supporting gay rights and a drag queen singing a cutesy children's song.  So yeah, if that's the worst part of his childhood he's pretty damn lucky, and the fact that he has the gall to still complain absolutely makes him selfish and ignorant. It's disrespectful, plain and simple, and if he were truly a good Christian he'd have some compassion.)

Okay, so Grazer has some weird "rules for me but not for thee" shit when it comes to religion. This isn't news. Where am I going with this?

Well, turns out he has this opinion about more than just religion. Know how I know this? His response to ESRB ratings and trigger warnings.

So it seems like Grazer sees the ESRB as some sort of moral compass, in a way. Something being rated E or E10 means it's pure and good and wholly unproblematic, while anything higher means it's evil and disgusting and he can't even look at it.

This is further confirmed by this post, where he flat-out states he sees the ESRB as deeming what things are and are not morally acceptable.

Now Grazer, I'm gonna explain this as best as I can, because it seems like you don't quite understand this. Read very carefully.

This is not the purpose of the ESRB rating system.

I repeat, this is NOT the purpose of the ESRB rating system.

The ESRB does not decide on what is and is not morally correct. It simply says "This game contains these topics, and as such is most suitable for people in this age group.". That's it. It's a guideline, not a rule.

Let's take cartoon violence, for instance. It's a very common warning the ESRB puts on games. Almost every game from Mario to Sonic to Crash Bandicoot and even Monster Tale has this warning. These games are all rated E for everyone. Does this mean those games are promoting violence to children, or claiming things like Bowser kidnapping Peach or Pinstripe trying to gun down Crash are perfectly okay and morally correct? Of course not. It's simply saying that these games contain mild, non-graphic violence, but most children should be able to handle seeing it.

On the other side of the coin, let's take a look at the warnings for nudity and sexual themes. Most games that contain these topics are rated T at the lowest and AO at the highest. This obviously isn't saying that nudity and sex are inherently bad or evil. All it's saying is that these topics are best handled by adults (And, regardless of morality, it is illegal to distribute sexual content to minors unless it's meant to be educational, like a health class textbook).

A few extra points:

. Games can be rated different things in different countries. Different countries have different regulations. Do you know why the blood in Danganronpa is pink? It's because in Japan, games with excessive amounts of blood and gore are given a Z rating (Japan's equivalent to an AO rating). They got around this by making the blood pink, securing the game its desired M rating. Meanwhile here in America, Mortal Kombat is allowed to show as many graphic, brutal deaths as it wants and still receive an M rating.

. ESRB ratings are not legally enforceable. I was so convinced as a 16 year old that the employees at gamestop would try to card me or something when I was picking up a copy of Bayonetta, and I was surprised when they simply rang me up in two seconds, no questions asked. It doesn't happen. For fuck's sake, one of the first games I ever played, at the tender age of four, was Soul Edge. A T rated game. The only instance ESRB ratings are legally enforced is in the case of AO ratings, as these games often contain incredibly graphic violenceor sexual content. If this outrage is coming from the idea that certain ratings will keep younger people from playing these games from a legal standpoint, don't worry. A nine year old is not gonna get arrested for playing Among Us. Just don't buy them GTA San Andreas or Leisure Suit Larry and everything will be fine.

. No two consumers are exactly alike. While one 13 year old may be perfectly fine with the jumpscares in Amnesia, another may be too scared to even go near the piano in Super Mario 64. That doesn't mean either of these games is rated incorrectly. The ESRB is there, once again, as a recommendation for the average consumer, and doesn't take individual experience into account. An individual experience is not their responsibility. It's also on parents (or you yourself!) To decide what the consumer can or can't handle.

"But Haley," I hear you say, "What if this piece of media DOES contain something morally bad?"

Well it's simple. You are allowed to like things AND still criticize the bad parts of it.

Hold on now, I'm not telling you that it's perfectly alright to enjoy things like Birth of a Nation or anything like that! Contrary to popular belief, there are some pieces of media that are truly too steeped in hatred and morally reprehensible things to be supported, even through a critical lense. The only merit things like that have is to serve as a warning: This is a terrible thing made for terrible reasons, and we should not allow it to happen again.

But outside of those rare circumstances, it's not so cut and dry.

Let's take a piece of media i actually enjoy, for instance, so you know I'm not a hypocrite: Persona 5.

Persona 5 is easily one of my favorite games in the Persona series. It does a lot of interesting stuff, the artstyle and soundtrack are (in my opinion) the best in the series, and overall it's very enjoyable for me.

But, like anything, it's not perfect. I'm incredibly uncomfortable with the hypocrisy the game has in regards to the sexualization of teenagers. While Kamoshida is rightfully condemned for his sexualization of teenage girls and Ann's persona awakening comes from rejecting this objectification, the game and story undermine it by not only putting Ann in a sexually revealing outfit, but also making light of Ryuji's sexual harassment by adult men (Allegedly Persona 5 Royal tries to fix this by making the men drag enthusiasts who think Ryuji would look good in drag and giving them more sympathetic personalities, but it's still really weird and hypocritical of the game to do this.). The teenage protagonist is also allowed the option to date adult women, including his teacher, and the game rarely if ever touches on the problems with this.

The game's homophobia also left a bad taste in my mouth. Aside from the aforementioned men who sexually harass Ryuji, the only other canon LGBT+ character is a bar owner who is either a drag queen or a trans woman (or both?). Sure, she's portrayed as being kind and protective of the protagonist, but there isn't much room to interact with her or learn more about her. On top of that, not only can the protagonist not romantically pursue his male friends (A feature that even the SECOND persona game had), he's not even allowed to give them gifts or platonically show affection towards them without the dialogue mocking him. The game that allows a teenage boy to date his teacher won't allow him to simply give his male friends a present.

And yet, despite those criticisms, I do still enjoy the game. I don't consider the game irredeemable garbage based on those poorly handled topics alone. And I also understand that for some people, those topics make them so uncomfortable that they don't want to play the game at all, and I completely respect that.

Criticizing the things you enjoy is not only normal, it's oftentimes healthy. Being able to step back and say "I like this thing, but I don't like the bad things it's done. This thing would be better if these issues were fixed." Sure, sometimes some people tend to complain a bit too much about the media they supposedly enjoy, but for the most part being able to acknowledge the bad with the good is a good skill to have.

Oh, wait, all of this means nothing because Grazer thinks that critically enjoying things is nothing more than an excuse to consume media he doesn't personally agree with. Okay then.

So if he can't even realize something as simple as "it's okay to criticize some parts of media that you otherwise enjoy", how can he be expected to look critically at a religion that he's been raised in and around all his life?

Soooo yeah, Grazer has some serious problems with black and white thinking that he refuses to acknowledge, further worsened by the fact that he's practically been brainwashed into believing that Christianity is the ultimate moral compass that everyone should follow. I understand that this tends to be an issue for neurodivergent people, but it's not an excuse for the actions he does that are related to these things (sending death threats to the ESRB, antagonizing others, etc.