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whatifitis · 1 day ago

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♡ i wish you would've stayed - LN 4 ♡

Summary: you and lando had a fling and things end but did he lie? he found someone new when he said he wasn't ready.

WC: 2636

CW: angst, very small mention of weight loss, overuse of song lyrics, use of quotes i found on tiktok

How can it be that everytime someone says they aren’t ready for a relationship with you, they always end up ready for the girl after?

You and Lando had been friends for a couple of months before you ended up developing feelings for him. Like, who wouldn’t fall for him? He’s funny, cute, and charming. You guys would talk for hours on end. Everytime you two would find something in common, it felt like the invisible string between the two of you was real. Maybe all these things were signs that you had finally met your person.

When you were able to talk to him, it felt like everything was okay. When it felt like no one wanted you around, he did. It didn’t matter if you just had a hellish day or not, he was always able to bring you back to joy and contentness in a second. He showed you how it felt to be loved, for the first time in your life.

When you’d confessed to him about your feelings for him, he’d said he liked you as well. You remember nearly bursting into tears as giddiness swirled in your chest. This was the first time your feelings had been well received, and it was someone who you had really grown fond of. He didn’t want to be anything yet so as to not feel pressured so early in this relationship and you understood, you were fine with it. The two of you often joked about what to call your situation as neither of you liked the term ‘situationship’ and ‘casual’ definitely wasn’t it. It was just two people who really liked each other and wanted to see how things went.

Everyday, the two of you spoke for hours at a time and it was fun. You’d shared music with each other and you’d actually grown to enjoy music from his favorite artist. When you asked him to make a playlist of all his favorite songs by the artist, he was genuinely so excited and got to work instantly. You loved seeing him so happy and you’re glad it was because of you, selfishly so. When he’d sent you the playlist, he’d named it one of the verses from a song that you had sort of dedicated to him. You really fell hard for him.

Even though it had just been a month or so, you were excited to picture a life with him. The two of you had even planned out your future home together. The colors of the walls of every room had already been picked out and it was the happiest you had been in a long time.

“We’re gonna have a house by the beach, yeah? And we’re gonna have a dog that’s practically our baby. And we’re gonna name it ‘Lando’.”

“Lan, why are we naming it after you?” you softly laughed.

“Well, when I was a kid, my family had gotten a dog and it was my job to name it. As the uncreative child I was, I named it after the best thing ever. Myself.” he smiled cheekily.

“No way. Oh my god.” you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Hold on. I’m not done painting the scene.”

“Alright, apologies, my love. Please continue.”

“So our dog, Lando, will lie in the sheets with us. The sun will always shine and there will be a ring on your hand. On your ring finger specifically. And I’ll hold you every night.”

But he lied. He made a promise he could never keep. He tried and tried until he couldn’t.

As time went by, his texts began to slow down. But you weren’t upset. When the two of you began this whirlwind of a relationship, he’d mentioned how with work and his mental health, he’d often go days without having the energy to talk to anyone. You understood, you’d been there before, you told him as long as he would talk to you whenever he was able, that you were going to be okay. And you were. Your days would go by where you wouldn’t get a text from him and it was okay. You were productive during the days and while you did miss him, you knew his struggles and you let him be with the occasional messages to check on him.

Then one Thursday in the fall, your world came crashing down. You sort of knew it was coming. There were signs that you chose to ignore, hoping it wasn’t true. But then you got the text “I don’t think we should talk anymore.” You really tried to understand. He said he felt guilty for dragging you along and that he didn’t want to keep doing it to you. He said he was tired and he wasn’t able to maintain a relationship of any sort. So you said ok. That was the last time the two of you spoke.

For weeks, you cried over this loss. It wasn’t just about essentially getting dumped. To you, he was your best friend and you lost him. That was the worst part. Not the fact that you didn’t have anyone to love anymore. Not that he just up and left. It was the fact that he was your friend before everything and you don’t have any part of him now.

You knew you had some fault in the ending though. You’d said things that weren’t the right things to say at the time. You had messed up often. You just wish you could take those back though. You wish you could’ve said something different. Then maybe he’d still be yours.

You told your friends what happened and it’s safe to say they all dislike him now. After everything, they started stating their opinions and talked shit about him but it didn’t help. You didn’t hate him, although you should have. You wished you could hate him and be angry, but you’re not. You’re just sad.

Everything reminds you of him. Every song is about him. Every poem is about him. Every book is about him. The blue in the water is him. The sun shining through your window is him. His face is everywhere. His voice is everywhere. His laugh is everywhere. The laugh you thought you would get to listen to for forever, is now a stranger.

You would find yourself still imagining things with him after the end of everything. You’d think of him in the stupidest things. You’d think of him while in the shower, how it’d be nice to have your things with his sitting along the edge of the tub. You would even imagine running out of soap so you would end up using his. You would go to work and the store wearing it. Only when in the night, when you would lay next to him in bed, would you smell where all your missing soap had gone.

It was those stupid little things that made the healing process so much harder.

He forgot you overnight. Meanwhile you lost your head and appetite. You ate a lot like a fly. Your anxiety had also gotten worse, making your heart race every second of the day. You thought of giving up everything. It was a dramatic thing to consider considering you couldn’t even classify what happened as a breakup, as he was never yours.

After some time, the tears stopped. The heartbreak didn’t, but you were able to continue with your life and get through some days. Every so often, you still check on him through social media, just to make sure he’s okay. Of course, that came back to bite you in the ass when you found out he was talking to someone.

The day you found it, your heart dropped and it felt like that Thursday all over again. All that healing had gone out the window because now everything feels like a lie. Was he making fun of you with some esoteric joke?

He said he wasn’t ready for a relationship, that he couldn’t maintain any relationship. He said he cared about you. You believed it. You were stupid to believe it. A fool for thinking any of it was real. The house, the songs, every little thing was a lie. All you ever thought about was there the hell he was and if he was okay but he didn’t give two shits about you. There was never a you and him. And there never would be.

You go back and forth between being angry and sad. You can’t tell if you’re making everything up in your head whether it was your relationship with him or the events after.

Every page you wrote, he was on it. Every word you wish you could say to him.

After letting you sulk for a few months, your friends dragged you out of the house so you could all go to a club and just have fun. There was no pressure to meet someone or walk away with someone. They said that all you owed them was to show up and have fun. So you went.

The night was beautiful at first. After pregaming a bit, you ordered yourself a drink at the club and just let loose with your girls. Dancing the night away and not caring about tomorrow. All that mattered was right now.

You could feel arms moving around you, your heart beating to the music, the alcohol working its magic through your system. You were glad to be there with your favorite people, when everything felt like it was falling away, you still had them.

It was truly an amazing night until there were whispers spread across the room. Lando was there, with his new girl. The two walked hand in hand towards the back corner of the club with their group.

What the fuck was he doing here? He could be anywhere in the world, why is he here?

You didn’t know what to do. For the longest time, you’d imagined what you would do if you were to be in the same room as him again. You composed a hundred ways to tell him the reasons why you could’ve played for keeps, all of which would sit collecting dust, rotting in your house.

You watched as they settled into the rhythm of the club, when Lando looked straight at you. He looked different. He looked lighter.

Your friends caught this moment and immediately grabbed you and tried to get you to ignore them. They wanted you to show Lando that you’re better off without him, that you’re okay. So you tried. You tried to keep dancing, to keep your heavy feet moving, to act as if your heart wasn’t being dragged through you.

You needed a minute. Telling one of your friends you were going to the restroom, you pushed through the crowd. Squeezing through a mess of entangled, sweaty bodies. You kept pushing until you found yourself on a balcony, trying to catch your breath. You moved to a more secluded spot so you could try and recuperate.

Resting your arms on the railings, you lowered your head to try and figure out what to do. Did you want to confront him, ask for closure? Or did you just want to let it go and try to be free?

You were caught up in your head when you heard someone clearing their throat somewhere behind you. Looking up, you were met with those hazel green eyes that you had fallen for all those months ago.

“Hey,” Lando started “didn’t know you were here. Small world, eh?”

“Yeah. Crazy.”

“Come on. Why you being short with me?”

“Nothing. So, uh. Who’s the girl?”

“Oh, yeah. Hannah is my girlfriend. She’s pretty great.”

“Good for you. I’m glad you found someone who can love you the way you deserve. We all need someone to hold and now you found your person.” “Thanks. She helps me a lot and she knows how it feels to be alone in the rain. I guess I just needed someone to stay.” he shrugged, smiling at you. He wasn’t trying to be malicious, he was just happy that he’d found his love.

I stayed.

“She seems great. I’m happy for you.”

Please, keep me close.

“Yeah. You’ll find someone too. I’m sure you will.” Couldn’t you love me most?

“Yeah. Sure.”

The two of you stood there for a moment, savoring the silence for different reasons. You knew this was gonna be the end of your story with him. This was going to be the last time you would see him. He thought it was great that everything could remain civil.

“Well, I gotta go back in.” he said, pointing behind him towards the dance floor, “I’ll see you around. Take care.”

“You too!” you shouted back before he disappeared into the blinking lights and mess of music.

At the end of the day, you’re hopeless. He found someone better. He found someone to love. Someone to love him.

So here you sit in the bedroom of your apartment, just missing him and wishing things were different. And you can wish all that you want, but it won’t bring you two together. No matter the things he said or did, you still loved him.

After all this time, you would still bend back to him if he left the door open. All he had to do was say the words, and you’d play again. But who were you to ask for more? You were just a little chapter in his story while he was more to you.

If he needed someone, he could’ve picked you. You would’ve given him everything. All he had to do was ask. And you know that can’t solve everything. You just wish he chose you. For once, you wish you had been chosen. You wish he had chosen to love you. You wish he chose you even if it was just to toy with you for longer.

You still can’t hate him. You honestly wish the best for him. You want him to be happy, even if it means it’s not with you. You want him to have the life he’s dreamed of, with the walls of his house painted blue, red and pink. You hope he gets to go to the city his favorite artist was born in and have a drink at the bar they used to perform at. You hope he’s okay.

You now know, you’re just not that girl. It was your own fault for not being good enough. She won him, the girl with the gold hair. That’s the girl he chose. So one day, when he walks down the aisle to complete his great love story, you hope he remembers that you’re glad to see him win. You can’t claim to be on the side of love if you can’t even support it in someone you love. It’s not fair to him.

Your birthday falls on the 29th night of December and you stand in the middle of your kitchen surrounded by your family who say they love you. A birthday cake sits in front of you, coffee flavored, a flavor you never liked. Everyone sings you a happy birthday as you stand there, not letting the tears fall from your face. No one can see the ache in your heart and the way it feels like it’s being dragged down your body. So you just smile.

You close your eyes to make a wish, but no wish appears as you blow out the candles, just the thought ‘Only three more days left living in a year where you loved me. Only a few more days left in a year where I've allowed myself to love you knowing you don’t’.

Wishing only wounds the heart, after all.

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cherryswisherz · 16 hours ago

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GLORIA [verse one]

♱ CONTAINS: kissing and cursing das it

♱ NIYAHSPEAKS: PAZZI MINI SERIES ONNA HOE okay so like the vision is pazzi reminiscing on memories of their relationship. shoutout anon for the request

♱ ♱ ♱ ♱

❝i met her when i was off the porch as a teenager, she said one day i would right my wrongs and see paper❞

“BUECKERS!” Micah yells my name as I approach the benches near the basketball court.

I’m 15 minutes late but everyone should be used to that by now. By now, being late is my trademark so none of my friends look bothered. In fact, almost everyone is smiling as they dap me up and say hello.

Everyone except the only person in the group that I hadn’t seen before. Some girl with bug eyes.

Okay, so they aren’t big eyes. But they are big, brown eyes that look at me like she wants nothing more than my head on the chopping block.

“Yo, who’s this?” I nod my head towards the girl who’s shooting me the literal death glare.

“This is Azzi.” Micah slings an arm around Azzi's shoulder and she shrugs him off with a huff. “She’s my cousin. She just moved here.”

“Can she hoop?” I ask.

“She’s standing right here and she would appreciate it if you didn’t speak about her like she wasn’t.” Azzi snatches the ball from my hands and begins walking to the court. “And I thought the movie was White Men Can’t Jump?”

I have no choice but to laugh at her insinuation. Meeting her on the court, I snatch my ball back. “It’s a good thing I’m a woman then, huh?” I say.

“Oh? You got game white girl?”

“Like you’ve never seen before.”

“Show me then.”

“Check.”

And the game began.

❝we started out young, lookin' for some identity, made a thousand mistakes, but never did we lack chemistry❞

“PAIGE!” Azzi’s chasing after me. “Will you just wait for a a fucking second?”

Every fiber of my being is telling me to keep walking and never stop, but we’re in a hotel for state and she’s screaming my name. If someone complains, coach is gonna kill me.

I stop walking and shut my eyes, taking a deep breath.

Relax, Bueckers.

I pivot on my foot and stare at the girl in front of me.

If I wasn’t such a pussy, I’d tell her how beautiful she is. With her frizzy french braids and her tie-dye t-shirt and her St. Patricks Day socks. But complimenting her would only make this whole situation even more awkward, and if it gets any more awkward I might off myself.

So, instead of telling Azzi everything I’ve wanted to tell her since I’d met her, I speed walk back to our room grabbing her arm in the process.

I’ve never been one for serious conversations and Azzi and I’s friendship isn’t necessarily one where we have too many of them. But tonight, I thought I saw something.

Something in her eyes said, ‘it isn’t just you.’

God, I couldn’t have been any more wrong.

Shutting the door, I turn to her and make it a point to never take my eyes off the lamp behind her.

“I’m sorry.”

She furrows her eyebrows and cocks her head a little to the side. “You’re sorry?” she sounds confused, which is confusing me.

If she doesn’t want an apology then what the fuck does she want?

“Yes?”

“For what?”

For kissing you. For reading this whole thing wrong. For ruining our friendship and possibly losing us State because there’s no fucking way I’m gonna be able to focus tomorrow.

“For everything.”

All of a sudden, she’s not across the room for me anymore. She’s right in front of me, smacking me hard on the back of my head.

“OW!” I duck my head and slid under her raised arm. “What the fuck, Azzi?”

“You’re so stupid!” She shouts.

“How the fuck am I stupid for apologizing to you?”

We’re both yelling at each other, which to anyone else, may seem like a bad thing. But Azzi and I get our best communication done during our screaming matches.

Don’t ask me why… It just is what it is.

“Because I don’t want a fucking apology, Paige!”

“Well, the fuck do you want then?”

“YOU!”

Record. Scratch.

“What?” I’m not yelling anymore. I’m actually speaking so low that I almost don’t hear myself. “What did you say?”

“I was trying to tell you, but you kep-”

I cut her off, “Say it again, Azzi.”

She grins like the Cheshire cat, “I want you.”

“What does that mean, though?”

“Holy fuck, you’re actually dumb.” She rolls her eyes, “I like you too, Paige.”

I’ve waited to hear that for almost a year.

A year of staring when she isn’t looking. A year of moments that I wondered if she held as close to her as I did. A year of wanting her- no, needing her in ways that seem too mature for a 17 year old girl.

A part of me thinks she’s joking. Or she’s just trying to make me feel better…

I think about the kiss we shared 2 minutes ago. Her soft lips on mine, her in my lap on the bed next to me, grinding on my lap, driving me insane.

I think of her scrambling off me and saying stop and the guilt that has sat on my chest since.

“But-” The sentence dies in my mouth and tears well in my eyes, “But when we kissed-” I point at her “You said stop.”

Azzi’s arms fly up before plopping back to her side, “Because I don’t wanna fuck you the night before the state championship!”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh.” Azzi mocks me, “If you would have just waited 30 seconds, I would have told you that.”

Azzi Fudd likes me back. The girl I’ve been feining for, likes me back.

Suddenly, I’m aware of the chance to be a jackass, and of course, I have to take it.

I walk over to her and nudge her shoulder, “You liikkkee meeee.” I sing

She laughs and shoves me away, “Get away from me.”

“You liiikkke meeee and you liked when I kissed yooouuuu”

She crawls back in bed and uses the comforter to hide her smile, “Go to bed, Paige.”

I crawl in bed, on top of her and kiss all over her face, relishing in the fact that Azzi fucking Fudd likes me back.

❝i was in love with you, didn't know what it was with you, kiss you in back of the class just to get a buzz with you❞

“Ms. Bueckers.” Ms. Jackson says. “Put your phone up, before it becomes my phone.”

“I’m sorry, Ms. Jackson.” I flash her a grin and slide my phone into my pocket. I don’t even need to me on my phone anymore anyway.

Azzi and I’s plan is already set.

My eyes never leave the clock. Counting the seconds until they become a minute, until eventually a minute begins five.

My hand shoots in the air. “Can I go see my counselor?”

Ms. Jackson never turns from the board, her back still to the class as she groans before saying, “Get out, Paige.”

“Love you too, Ms. Jackson.” I smile and dip out of the classroom, making my way across campus to the gym.

“Finally.” Azzi groans, ball already in hand. “How do you make the plans and still come late?”

“Shut up,” I throw my bag down and walk over to her. ‘Gimme kiss.”

She ducks away from me, laughing, “I thought we were gonna play one-on-one?”

“We were.” I nod my head, “But you look so good,” I smile and grab her hips, pulling her closer.

She gives me a peck and tries to pull away, but a peck is never enough, so I chase her lips and she drops the ball, wrapping her arms around my neck.

In a few months I’m gonna graduate and go to UCONN and she’s still gonna be here. We’re gonna be almost 2,000 miles apart, and I don’t know how I’m gonna survive without her but I’m not gonna think about it right now.

Right now, I’m gonna do everything but fuck my girlfriend in the middle of my high school's gym.

♱TAGLIST @patscorner @riyahtheballer @mattslolita @thaatdigitaldiary @janaelalfysblunt @kmoneymartini @sageworld

@darkskinchristiandiorpostergirl @justliketoreadsowhat @pb524830 @pb524830 @dnftpn @sierrale8ne @numberonepartyanth3m

@pppaaiiiggggeeeeee @uwupaige @paigeluvvr @colorthecosmos444 @authentic-girl03 @makethemhoesmad @lovegalor333 @mrsarnold

@sellasstories @heart4caitlin @avvwritesstufff @st4rrzynight @bueckersp @paxaz535 @thelightknight21 @paxaz535

@darlindayss @his-loss @dreatopia

#niyahspeaks #uconn wbb #uconn #paige bueckers #wcbb #aubrey griffin #azzi fudd #kk arnold #paige bueckers fic #pazzi #azzi fudd fic #pazzi fics #pazzi is real #Spotify

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nuemanfilms · 4 hours ago

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NORMALITY FEELS UNREAL

s.w

summary sam’s always wanted normal, now that he has it, he’s in complete awe that’s it real. It’s real that he’s going to be a lawyer, and you’re going to be his wife.

content contains: brief mention of family, stanford!au, prelaw!sam, fiancé!fem!reader, sam finally getting his apple pie life, brief mention of stressed!sam, fem!reader and sam live together, smut, unprotected sex, piv, AFAB!fem!reader, softdom!sam, slight sub!sam, sam being an absolute gentleman, pet names (sweetheart, baby, honey), sam just got out of the shower, morning sex, mentions of sam always waking up early, top!sam, lots and lots of kissing, affection is so key, so much love it’s driving me crazy, etc.

notes oh my god, 1k, one-thousand of you, i’m actually in awe. can’t even begin to describe how grateful and amazing u all are, anyway, cooked this up last minute, incredibly lovey-dovey.

wc 1.4k

Sam wanted normal, he’d wanted normal all his life. Now that he had it, he didn’t know what to do but be in awe.

You met Sam on his first week of Stanford, the fond smile that lingered on your lips that day was now something he got to see all the time. He couldn’t even begin on how to start, and neither could you. Even with all the clumsy things you’d both done together, all the time you’d spent on a saturday night studying for an exam instead of partying with the frats — it was all worth it. There wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for you.

You remembered how nervous you both were, Sam himself barely able to get the question out of if you’d like to have dinner with him, and you said yes. Explaining how happy you were that he called, you still held a pink glow to your cheeks every time you woke up next to him.

The day he got the interview, changed the course of his life. It changed both of your lives. He was going to become a lawyer, just like he’d always wanted.

A few weeks after that, he asked you to spend your life with him. Sam Winchester, asked you to be his wife, and you said yes.

Even with all of the stories you both were told growing up about fairytales, one thing you both could agree on was never believing it’d ever happen. But here you were, a diamond ring on your finger. Soon to take the boy you met in stanford’s last name.

Sam never did mention specifics of his family, but he answered every question you asked. You knew he was stressed about you meeting his family, it’s been six years since he’d last seen any of them. You knew he had a bumpy relationship with his brother, but you also knew how much Sam wanted to see the elder Winchester. Dean was family, and also soon to be yours.

You still laid in bed as Sam showered, he always got up this early. The clock on the bedside table read: 8:34AM. You’d guess Sam got up less than twenty minutes ago, since the shower still ran.

You heard the shower curtain open, then close. Then rang the voice of your fiancé, “You can go back to sleep, Honey. We don’t have to get up and ready until noon.” you could hear the smile in his voice. He knew you were stubborn though, most likely already getting out of the bed.

The doorknob twisted and Sam let out a chuckle as he watched your tired frame walk in. He smiled down at you, a smile curling up on your own lips.

“You’re extra cheery,” You commented, his lips brushed against your temples before trailing down to your own. You could practically feel him smiling as he kissed you.

It started off gentle, you both didn’t even seem to realize how urgent it got that quickly. It’s not like you could think straight though, you’d just woke up and now you were being eased back into the bed with a large hand gripping your hip.

“You just woke up and you’re already this needy to get on me, baby?” He teased before getting cut off by his own groan when he felt your hips press into his own. Sam could practically feel the heat radiating off your core, and it just made him even more desperate.

Sam’s lips broke away from yours for a split second, leaving you to start giving a protest before he started to leave open-mouthed kisses at the skin of your neck. His hands wandered everywhere he could reach, trying to pull as many sounds as he could from your lips even without that much contact.

Of course, it was working.

Sam’s hands slid the hem of your shirt up your body ever so slightly, revealing the skin of your stomach. He practically moaned at the lace that was hidden beneath the oversized shirt you wore, “Can I?” You didn’t understand how the man was asking at this point. Especially on how you were already spread out for him, “Yeah.” Sam’s hands lifted the fabric up and off your body. Discarding the T-Shirt somewhere in the bedroom. You could feel the hardness pressing against your thigh, your leg wrapped around his waist. Pulling him further against your core, “Fuck, let me get these off first, baby.” Sam said through gritted teeth.

You felt his fingers tugging at the hem of your panties, pulling them off and away. You felt a shiver run up your spine at the cool air hitting your exposed skin. Sam’s lips molded against yours again, swallowing your moans as his finger ran up your slit. Collecting your arousal on his middle finger just with one swipe.

You were soaked, and as much as Sam wanted to take it slow — it seemed you were too needy for the foreplay.

“Mm, as much as I love your fingers, please fuck me, Sam…” Sam let out another chuckle, nodding his head. “Yeah, yeah. I got you, sweetheart.”

One hand steadied on your hip while the other guided himself to your entrance, for a moment, Sam just looked down at you mesmerized. In pure awe that he had you beneath him like this. It was unreal, it always had been.

His lips were on yours within seconds when he started to push inside of you, trying to distract you from the temporary pain. Your nails clawed at his back, Sam let out a groan into your mouth. He pulled away, nuzzling his face into your neck while his lips pressed tender kisses against your flesh.

“God, you feel so good, baby. So good for me, just a little more, yeah?” His voice was so syrupy sweet, you were so focused on it that you didn’t even realize he wasn’t even fully inside of you yet. This wasn’t your first time with him, but fuck, it felt like it everytime. You could feel every inch, every single inch of him filling you. You were so in bliss, you couldn’t even make a sound.

Sam on the other end was in ths same amount of bliss, maybe even more. You felt perfect every single time. He couldn’t get tired of this, he’d never get tired of you. He fucking loved every second of it, every second he spent.

“M-Move, please.” Your voice sounded almost like a whisper when the plea left your lips. His hips snapped, pulling a gasp from you. Your moans filled the room within seconds when he started to move.

The spews of curses mixing along with the obscene sound of skin on skin filled the bedroom. Your nails scratched down his skin, leaving red streaks in their wake.

“You’re so goddamn perfect like this, so gorgeous- fuck… you feel so good on my dick, baby.” Sam praised, his teeth grazed the skin of your collarbone before he bit down. His tongue then soothing over the mark beginning to form.

Every moan, every cry, everytime Sam felt you squeeze around him had him in a trance. He felt your fingers tangle in his locks, tugging on them to steady yourself.

“Sam-“ You gasped out, you could feel the knot beginning to build in your abdomen. Sam knew you were close, his hips driving into you faster, harder. He pressed a kiss to your lips again, “I know, I know you are. ‘m almost there, honey, okay? Fuck, please just let me fuck you- just a few more, please, baby.” He sounded so desperate, so desperate to keep going.

You let him, and the thought of how spent he was pushing you to the brink of made him throb inside of you. Sam moaned, and you swore you’d have it tattooed in your brain forever.

“C’mon, cum for me. I know you can, you always can, sweetheart. I got you,” You cried out, your walls spasming around him as you came. His hips slowed, but kept a pace just enough to work you through your orgasm. Sam’s littered kisses all over your jawline, his own hips starting to stutter before he spilled himself inside of you.

You stayed like that for a moment, your breaths were both heavy. Yet it was almost like Sam was checking if you were real, if you were really there with him.

“I’m right here, Sammy.” You reminded him, pulling him out of his daze. He buried his face in your neck, mumbling a small ‘I know’.

#sam winchester smut #supernatural #fem!reader #sam winchester #jared padalecki #sam winchester x female reader #sam winchester fluff #creds to owner for dividers

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toomuchbirth · 2 days ago

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Birth Quickie 4:

Boy

My best friend was having a hard time focusing on the movie we both were watching.

I couldn't really take your eyes off him. He was still just Brandon. I met the guy at work a couple years ago, started hanging out with after he moved into town. We’d both just clicked, and it was great.

Then he started getting real snappy with me out of nowhere a few months ago. I asked him what his deal was, and he told me to fuck off. I basically hadn’t talked to him or seen him since.

Until today. I got a call, he asked if I could come over, hang out. He said he really needed a friend today, someone he could trust. Before I hung up to head over, he made me promise not to freak out. Most important, I couldn't tell anybody what I saw.

He had poked his head around the door when he opened it. Motioned me in. “Ok man, what the hell is this-” I began, but stopped as I turned around to see him.

God. He was… it was… His favorite, biggest shirt didn’t even come close to covering the huge, hairy mound that was hanging off him. He still had his beard and mustache, arms still hairy and muscular. He was still in jeans.

“I think I’m having it today.” He said, unable to meet your eyes, one hand on his belly. “Uh… c-congrats?” I stammered out, just taking in the sight of him. I could see he clearly was exhausted already, he waddled gingerly away from the door, sat heavily onto the couch, motioned for me to come over.

“Heh. No. Not really a ‘congrats’ kinda thing. More a ‘What are you gonna do now.’ Damned if I know. I’m just so fuckin’ tired, man. I need this thing out of me. I need my life back.” His voice cracked. He blinked rapidly, still not looking at me. I couldn't stop staring at him. *He looks so good like this…* my brain told me, which I tried to ignore. *Imagine how he looks naked* was a follow up, which caused a familiar, shameful aching between my legs as I tried to remind myself he was my best friend and he clearly wasn't thrilled with his appearance.

“So. Uh… the… other dad?” I asked, and Brandon grimaced. “No other dad. Not even one, I’m not this things dad. I’m just gonna have it here, and then I need you to make it just… go away, ok? I have work tomorrow, I can't deal with finding a shelter or dropping it at a hospital after it comes. Fortunetly, I- Oh… fuck!” His words crushed into a pained growl. The pregnant orb shrank visibly as he held it. “Fuck… fuck… ok, ok, just… mngh…” he blinked rapidly, trying not to let tears come.

I watched Brandon have a contraction. God, I watched Brandon have a contraction. Brandon was pregnant. As the muscles relaxed, I asked “so… is this a, ah… magic thing? Or were you…” he waved me off. “Trans. I WISH it was magic. Wouldn't have been like this so long, probably. Might have even had a choice if it happened.”

My mouth went dry. “Was… God, Brandon did somebody-” “Shut it. You know enough. I’m about to push this thing out, hopefully soon. You’re gonna do me a solid, and take it away, and then I’ll pass out and head to work tomorrow. Then we never mention tonight again. Ok?”

What else could I say? My best friend turned on the movie and we both pretended to watch it. Or at least he did. I couldn't stop staring. *He’s so sexy.* My mind helpfully provided, as he groaned in pain again, holding his belly. *He’s about to have a baby, right here in front of you. You’re about to see everything!*

I ignored the thoughts. Tried to, at least. But I couldn’t stop drinking in his every curse and whimper. Noticing how his whole body flexed and strained with each contraction. It was breathtaking. His hands gripping the couch or his belly. The way his expression scrunched, his teeth grit, trying not to cry as his labor got more intense.

“Oh man… this one is big… they’re so close now… this is happening, man… it’s so bad!” The handsome trans man growled, and I watched him start wrestling at the waist of his pants. Trying to undo them.

“How close are they?” I asked, my mouth dry. “F-five minutes…” he forced out. “Help. Feel like I gotta use the bathroom. Think it means it's time. My body is.. trying to trick me… into pushing… God it hurts!”

I moved around in front of him. Ran my hands over his hairy belly. It felt so good… firm and full, the hair soft. Moved them down to his jeans. Undid the knot holding them shut, and the zipper opened on its own. He’d refused to buy maternity clothes, just getting more pregnant in secret. I wondered how he’d hidden it so long. It seemed so obvious like this.

I pulled at the laboring man’s pants and boxers. I could see pubic hair. Could see the swollen lips of his vagina. *It's so perfect…* my mind chimed in. *I want to touch it. This is so sexy… I get to watch him have a baby!* I shook my head and kept piling down, exposing his legs, until Brandon was naked from the waist down.

“It's so strong… I keep fighting it… it hurts, it hurts so bad!” The poor guy growled, before spreading his legs, and… pushing. God, Brandon was pushing… I couldn't believe it. His face was stunning, a scrunched mass of pain and effort. His thighs quivered and shook as he pushed. I moved into position, guiding his feet up to my shoulders, kneeling on the floor as he sat on the couch. I could feel how hard he was bearing down. See everything.

He hated this.

I loved this.

I watched as, push by push, his crotch bulged with the head. He groaned constant swears as, slowly, those damp, puffy lips began to part. The glistening of a head peeking out from inside him. Then opening him wider. Wider.

“I don't want it, I don't want it, It’s not fair!” He sobbed, unable to hold back anymore. “I never wanted a baby! It's so bad, it hurts so much! I didn't ask to get pregnant!”

What could I say? There was nothing behind vague support that could help. So I gave it. Telling him to be brave, be strong as he did the most amazing, beautiful thing I'd ever seen inches from my face.

He couldn't stop. Barely had time to breathe between contractions. The whole head gushed free. The shoulders bulged him even worse, but those too slipped out, the body slipping from his most intimate place.

I did as he asked, without a word. It was the least I could do after Brandon showed me something so amazing. Even if he didn't realize how much I would enjoy it.

He invited me to hang out a couple weeks later. We didn't talk about what happened. He was my best friend again, like nothing had changed. But I couldn't ever really see him the same way again…

#pregnancy #labor #birth #crowning #unwanted pregnancy #forced birth #trans pregnancy #ftm pregnancy

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worldsmessiestwriter · 2 days ago

Text

Just lunch.

tw - none

word count - 978

Peter Parker x Stark! Reader

inspired by Only Tea from great gatsby the musical

—————————————————————————

The soft hum of Tony Stark’s voice filled Peter Parker’s Bluetooth earpiece as he maneuvered through Midtown traffic on his way home. The sky was painted in hues of orange and gold, but Peter barely noticed, too consumed by the whirlwind of emotions triggered by the phone call he was still reeling from.

“Relax, kid,” Tony drawled, clearly smirking on the other end. “It’s just lunch. A little bread, maybe some salad. You’ve had lunch before, right? You’re not gonna implode.”

Peter gripped the steering wheel tighter, his voice strained. “Yeah, but I’ve never had this lunch before, Mr. Stark! What do I even say to her? How do I start? Do I start? Should I bring flowers? Does she like flowers? Oh my God, what if she’s allergic to flowers and I kill her on the spot—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Tony cut in. “Stop spiraling. First of all, nobody’s allergic to all flowers, Parker. And second of all, she’s not some stranger you met on Tinder. It’s Y/N. You’ve done this dance before.”

“But we haven’t,” Peter argued, his voice rising with panic. “Not since—well, not since she…”

Tony sighed, a rare moment of genuine understanding sneaking into his tone. “Look, I get it. Five years is a long time. But you’re forgetting one key detail here, kid.”

“What’s that?” Peter asked, almost afraid of the answer.

“She’s Y/N.”

Peter blinked at the simplicity of it, his mind scrambling for a way to make sense of the statement.

Tony continued, his voice growing more patient. “You think she doesn’t remember you? Doesn’t care? Kid, the second she came back, I asked her what she wanted. You know what she said?”

Peter swallowed. “What?”

“She said, ‘Where’s Peter?’” Tony’s voice softened slightly, but his trademark sass quickly returned. “Not ‘where’s Dad?’ Not ‘how’s the company?’ Not even, ‘wow, what’s up with that whole universe-dusting situation?’ You. She wanted you.”

Peter’s chest tightened, his breath hitching.

“So, take a deep breath,” Tony instructed. “She’s not some long-lost pen pal. She’s your girl. And all you have to do is show up, eat some carbs, and let her remind you why you fell for her in the first place. Easy-peasy.”

“Easy-peasy?” Peter repeated incredulously. “Easy for you to say! You’re Tony Stark! I’m just… me. What if I mess this up? What if she realizes I’m not the guy she remembers? I’m a workaholic now! I wear ties!”

Tony let out a bark of laughter. “Oh, no! Not ties! How will she ever recover?”

“Mr. Stark,” Peter groaned, pressing a hand to his forehead as he pulled into the parking garage of his apartment building. “I’m serious. What if she doesn’t… feel the same?”

Tony paused for a moment, and Peter could hear the faint clinking of glassware in the background, probably Tony making himself a drink. When he finally spoke, his tone was steadier, calmer.

“She will, kid. I promise you, she will.”

Later that night, Peter paced the length of his apartment, phone in hand, scrolling through Google for advice that no search engine could possibly provide. His thoughts ping-ponged wildly:

What should I wear? What’s the perfect “Hey, I’m a professional now, but I’m still your dorky Peter” outfit? A blazer? Too formal. Jeans? Too casual. Oh my God, what if she thinks I’ve let myself go? Should I do push-ups right now? Is there enough time to get in shape before tomorrow?

Frustrated, he flopped onto his couch and grabbed a pillow, muffling his scream into it.

He dialed Happy’s number on instinct, but when the man answered with, “This better be important,” Peter panicked and hung up immediately.

Instead, he called Tony. Again.

“Kid, I swear if you’re calling me about flowers again—”

“I don’t know what to say! What if I walk in and freeze? Or worse, what if I talk too much and say something stupid? What if I accidentally bring up the Snap? I can’t just be like, ‘Hey, remember when you disintegrated in my arms?’ That’s not lunch conversation!”

“Peter,” Tony groaned, clearly exasperated but still indulgent. “It’s only lunch. You’re acting like you’re about to propose or give a TED Talk on nanotechnology.”

Peter sat up straight, alarmed. “Should I prepare a speech?”

“No!” Tony practically yelled. “For crying out loud, Parker, if you don’t stop overthinking this, I’m gonna send Pepper to come knock some sense into you. Or Morgan. She’s scarier.”

Peter groaned, leaning back against the couch and covering his face with his hands. “I can’t help it, Mr. Stark. This feels… big.”

“It is big,” Tony said, his voice gentler now. “But you don’t have to handle it all at once. Just show up. Let it happen. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.”

The next day, as Peter drove to the lakeside cottage, his mind raced with every possible worst-case scenario. He was running early—so early, in fact, that he had time to pull over at a rest stop and scream into his jacket sleeve again.

When he finally arrived, Tony was waiting on the porch, sipping a cup of coffee like he didn’t have a care in the world.

“You’re late,” Tony teased as Peter walked up the steps.

Peter frowned. “I’m ten minutes early.”

“Yeah, well, you look like you’ve been marinating in anxiety for hours. Thought you might need a little nudge.” Tony patted him on the back and leaned in, lowering his voice conspiratorially. “Remember: it’s just lunch.”

Peter nodded, trying to believe it.

But when he saw Y/N standing on the dock, laughing with Morgan as the wind caught her hair, his breath hitched, and for the first time in five years, his world felt whole again.

“Just lunch,” he whispered to himself, smiling despite his nerves. Maybe Tony was right after all.

—————————————————————————

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canirove · 3 days ago

Text

Canary boy | Chapter 3

Previous chapter | Next chapter (coming out on Tuesday)

Masterlist

“Inés, did you just giggle?”

“No.”

“Inés, I know you, and you just giggled. Who is the lucky one who has managed that?” Carla says. “Maybe the tall guy we met the other night?”

“The one who thought I was a lesbian because I played football?” I snort.

“What?”

“Men” I shrug.

“That's… nevermind. If it isn't him, then who is it?” she asks again, raising her eyebrows up and down like that Milhouse gif.

“No one.”

“I don't believe you” she says, snatching my phone from my hands before I can hide it in my bag.

“Carla!”

“You seriously need to put a password, Inés. What if someone steals your phone and sees all your sexy photos?” she smirks.

“I don't have sexy photos” I reply, rolling my eyes.

“Why? You are sexy and… Why is Pedri sending you a photo of him eating churros?”

“It's an inside joke” I say, taking advantage of her shock to get my phone back. Maybe I do need a password on it, but to avoid having her lurking.

“An inside joke? Since when do you have inside jokes with him? And that was WhatsApp, Inés. Not Instagram. I thought you only followed each other there.”

“Not anymore” I say.

It had happened the day after our churros date or whatever you want to call it. We had spent the night chatting on Instagram, Pedri asking me about how meeting my grandparents had gone, and telling me that his hungover had come back with violence once he had made it home. And the morning after, he had asked me for my number because he liked chatting on WhatsApp better, the “oh my God” I screamed when I saw that message being heard by the whole building. Like I already said, I'm stupid and I like getting my hopes up too fast and too much.

Though it's been a week, and we've been texting daily and very often. Very often.

“Inés…” Carla sighs. “He has a girlfriend.”

“I know.”

“Do you? Because this totally looks like flirting.”

“What?” I laugh.

“Having inside jokes about churros of all things? Texting on WhatsApp? The fact that he has made you giggle?”

“Carla, we are just friends.”

“No, you aren't. You fancy him, Inés!”

“Who do you fancy?” Aitana says, sitting next to me.

“No one” I quickly say, focusing on tying up my boots to hide the colour of my face.

“Who does she fancy?” she asks Carla.

“Someone she shouldn't.”

“Víctor?”

“What?” Carla and I say at the same time.

Víctor is one of the men's team stars, another young player from the academy like myself who made it to the first team at the same time I did. And since we both also play in the same position, everyone has always joked that we are destined to end up together, himself included. But the thing is, that I can't stand him. I've never have.

As a kid his ego already was too big for someone so young, and now it is even worse. The fact that once the awkward teenage years passed he turned out to be quite hot, girls all over the world being so obsessed with him that it sometimes is scary, hasn't helped.

“I don't know. Since he is someone she shouldn't fancy and you've always said that you can't stand him…” Aitana shrugs. “We are filming some stuff with the boys after training, by the way. He'll probably be there.”

“Urgh, don't remind me of it” I say. “They'll probably put us together again.”

“They have to give the shippers their monthly content, Inés” Aitana teases me.

“Idiot” I reply, giving her a little push.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry” she laughs. “But you know it's true.”

“Whatever. Let's go training and stop talking about men” I say, standing up.

“Yeah, let's go avoid thinking about the mess we may be getting ourselves into” Carla says behind me before following us.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“And Inés, you will be filming a guess who with Víctor.”

“Great” I sigh.

“Did you say anything, Inés?”

“I was just wondering where he is” I quickly say.

“Were you missing me, my love?” someone says behind me.

“Jesus Christ!”

“Almost as famous” Víctor laughs. “Looking beautiful today” he smirks, putting his arm around my shoulders.

“Thank you” I reply, moving to be in front of him so he stops touching me. “Where were you? You are late.”

“Is that jealousy, Inés? Are you worried I may be seeing someone else?”

“What?” I laugh.

“You look really cute when you are jealous” he smirks, closing the space between us so he can caress my cheek. But I'm faster, and take a step back just in time to make him miss.

“I'm not jealous, Víctor.”

“Of course not, my love.”

“I'm not your love either.”

“Yet” he winks. “Anyway, should we start filming this thing? If we finish early we can go grab something to eat… or whatever you fancy.”

“What I fancy, is to go home. Alone” I add when he is about to say another of his stupid flirty sentences.

“Always so harsh, my love.”

“I'm not your… urgh” I groan. Lord, grant me patience, because if he says another my love, I'm gonna end up committing murder.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“And now who is calling… me” I say after finally making it home and checking my phone.

This can't be real. It has to be a mistake. He's trying to call someone else and dialed my number because we had been texting earlier. Or maybe not. Maybe he actually is calling me. Maybe something happened. Maybe he needs my help. Maybe he is in danger! If he is, I should probably answer and stop with my internal dialogue, shouldn't I? Ok, you can do this, Inés.

“Pedri, why are you video calling me? Is everything ok?”

“Hello to you too” he chuckles.

“Hi, sorry. But is everything ok?”

“Yeah.”

“Then why are you calling me?”

“Because my head is about to explode after being in front of my laptop working on an assignment for the past few hours, and I needed a distraction.”

“And I am a distraction?” I laugh.

“You have no idea” Pedri smirks. He… umm… what? “Anyway, are you free? Do you want to go out for a walk? I seriously need to leave my room and have some fresh air.”

“I just made it home, but… Yeah, why not?”

“Great!” he says with a smile that makes me feel all fuzzy inside. “I'll call an Uber and pick you up. See you in a bit, Inés.”

“Bye” I smile back before he hangs up.

Did I just agree to go out with Pedri? As in some kind of… date? But it is a friends date, of course. Because that's what we are. Just friends. Though one of the friends is completely infatuated with the other, and for the past week may have been dreaming about very steamy cooking dates and other things that involve his churro. But my period just left and the days after I'm horny, ok? Ok.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“I can't believe that as someone born and raised in Barcelona, I had no idea this place existed.”

“That's because you are a mountain girl, Inés. The sea doesn't call you the same way it calls me, an island boy” Pedri says.

“What?” I laugh, taking the hand he is offering me to help me jump from the rocks we just walked down to make it to the beach. I could very well do it myself, but letting him be a gentleman and help me won't hurt anybody, will it? Unless you ask Carla, of course.

She would probably say that us touching like this would cause a tsunami that would destroy the city. Though maybe the sea starting to boil due to the heat that is going through my body and coming from it right now, would be more likely to happen. Dear Lord, Inés. He's just holding your hand! Stop being so lame and… horny!

“You don't like the sea” Pedri says.

“I do.”

“But not as much as you like the mountain” he says while we walk, still holding hands. “When you have some free time, you always go hiking or for a walk around the woods, you don't come to the beach to have a swim like I do.”

“How do you know that?”

“I've seen it on your Instagram” he smiles. Wait a second… Pedri has been paying attention to what I post? What? And more importantly… why? “You are a mountain girl, and that's ok. Next time you have to take me to one of your favourite spots.”

“Next time?”

“Today I think this is the perfect one for us” he says, putting down the backpack he was carrying and completely ignoring my question, which only means one thing: I will be thinking about it and what he meant with next time for the rest of my life. “Fancy a beer?”

“What?” I say, my brain working again and making me sit down on the sand next to him.

“You can drink beer, can't you? Or is that something you are not allowed to anymore?”

“Oh, no, we can. They just suggest us to not drink too much.”

“I'm not planning on getting you drunk, don't worry” Pedri winks before opening one bottle and passing it to me. How did I manage to take it from his hand and not let it fall after that wink and our fingers touching again? Nobody knows. “So, what should we toast to?” he asks after opening one for himself. “This place?”

“Nah, that's too boring. What about… to getting distracted?”

“I like that. To getting distracted” he says, raising his bottle.

“To getting distracted” I reply, doing the same with mine before drinking. “Urgh, I had forgotten how good this beer is.”

“It is your favourite, isn't it?”

“It is, yes. How do you know? My Instagram again?” I ask with a teasing smile. Wow, Inés. Bold move there.

“No, not this time” he laughs, the sound making me feel funny things on my stomach. “I know it is your favourite because you mentioned it the last time we all went out together after class.”

“How can you remember that? I can't even remember what I had for lunch yesterday” I chuckle.

“I just do” he shrugs, taking a sip from his beer.

After that, we both stay in silence, neither of us saying a word while we drink and watch the sun set behind the waves. But it isn't an awkward silence. It is one of the most comfortable and nice ones I've ever experienced. Nice, until the worst thing ever happens.

“Oh my God, Inés!” Pedri laughs while I cover my face with my hands and wish the sand would open and swallow me whole. “What was that noise? A dinosaur?”

“I'm so sorry you had to hear that” I say from behind my hands. “But I haven't eaten anything since before training and…”

“And you are starving. Big time” he laughs again.

“Yeah.”

“Should we go grab something to eat? After hearing that, I'm afraid you may try to eat me.”

“What?” I say, daring to look at him. Which is the biggest mistake ever, because he is: one, smirking, and two, way closer to my face than I had expected him to be.

“Are you going to eat me, Inés?”

“What?” I repeat with a nervous laugh, my eyes moving from his to his lips. Have I said yet that they are the most kissable lips ever? Kissable, and edible too.

“I fear you might” he says, closing the space between us a bit more.

“Pedri…”

“Inés…” he whispers, his face now so close to mine that I've felt him saying my name on my skin.

He is going to kiss me. He is, isn't he? Why else would he be so close to my face right now? There is no other explanation, is it? He is going to kiss me. He…

“Inés!” he laughs again when my stomach makes another horrible noise, sending to hell my hopes for that kiss. “C'mon, let's get you some food before you actually eat me.”

“I was about to” I say, speaking before thinking.

“I know” he smirks, getting up from the sand. “But there is a really good restaurant close by, and their food tastes way better than I do.”

“I beg to differ.”

“Uh?”

“Nothing, nothing” I say, quickly standing up. I think I'm so hungry it has started to affect my brain. “Sorry about the dinosaur in my stomach.”

“You don't need to apologize, Inés. I actually am quite hungry too. Shall we?” Pedri says after putting our empty beer bottles back on his backpack.

“Let's go” I reply, forcing myself to smile and to ignore the fact that we, as in Pedri and yours truly, almost kissed. I think.

#pedri #pedri gonzalez #pedri x reader #pedri gonzalez x reader #pedri fanfic #pedri gonzalez fanfic #pedri imagine #pedri gonzalez imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

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allthedamnlove · 3 days ago

Text

AQUAMARINE: RAFE CAMERON X SOFIA FANFICTION: CHAPTER 3, PART 1

Previous Chapter

Face claim for a new OC, Victoria Ramirez: Sofia Carson

WORDCOUNT: 7.5K

Radio for the chapter:

Sofia's POV:

“Well, to wear blue or not to wear blue ‘tis the question, what do you think?”

Merrp Merrp

“Oh my God, Sofia, are you still talking to the cat?”

I heard my cousin Victoria Ramirez's voice boom through Facetime. She appeared on camera with a bowl of cut-up fruit on her hands, and I could feel her amusement radiating from miles away.

“Shut up, Vic. Mishmish is a good and fair judge of character and also has an impeccable fashion sense, aren’t you, my niñita?” I concurred as I threw a sideways look at my tabby ginger cat, Mishmish, with her irresistible chubby face and snow-white neck adorning a cute blue ribbon, positioned suavely in her loaf position on her cat bed as she peered at me with observant eyes. I found this cutie when I visited here for summer vacations four years ago and she was just a lone kitten, probably left astray by her mom, shivering on our family’s porch. My sisters and I felt so bad for her and thought we would send her to the adoption center the next day after we bathed the poor kitten.

That didn’t happen at all. And now I am a mom to the most adorable, chatty cat ever.

“I wish I could aww at you but I am just sad that you have no social life and that all you do is bartend and yap to your cat which by the way, doesn't even understand what you’re saying”

“Well, you can stop feeling sorry for me ‘cuz I-” I shot back as I twirled around, clutching my possible outfit for the party by its coat hanger, “-am going to a Kook party. With a special invite”

“Uh huh, now I am invested.” she came closer to the camera, keeping her food on the table, “whose party is it, anyway?”

“Rafe Cameron invited me to go to his party, Vic. Yesterday night. After I embarrassed myself in front of him by going to a prohibited beach”

“OH! Now why didn’t you tell me that crucial piece of info before, missy? Wait. Hold up, you went swimming in a prohibited area, Where? How? What happened? Oh my God, did you die? Am I talking to Sofia's haunted soul?”

“Yup I did, and before you start bombarding me with questions again, I’ll just say what happened: basically I was sick of working. Again as usual. And then I wanted to do something out of the blue, something fun and spontaneous. And so I saw the beach and no one was there which I should have thought that through and then I just went in, mind you, I literally stripped my clothes off and was about to dive and then I felt two hands literally pulling me and then I went autopilot mode and then I screamed and guess who it was who grabbed me…” I threw my hands in the air as I recollected that painful memory, “Rafe. fucking. Cameron.”

God, that was in my top ten moments of Sofia Ramirez being an absolute dumb dumb.” I might not have died from the water, but I sure did when I turned around and saw him.

Funnily enough, I was thinking about the flirty-not-flirty conversation we had in the bar a week ago. That night when I lay in bed, sleep didn’t even befriend me as I stared at the night light all night, thinking about the teasing smiles he threw at me and my heart shaking as I quipped back at him, the pink light emanating fresh bits and pieces of memories as I mindlessly stared it for hours. For the town’s certified cokehead, he was charming to the T.

And god I would be lying if I said I didn’t find him attractive.

When he asked me if I could come to his party after seeing me in my most unattractive set of underwear that had been used for a year, my mind just went circuit. I just said “Yes” I knew that I had met him only twice, that too, never had a proper conversation but this flicker of attraction and child-like curiosity about this guarded man is gnawing me alive. And the way our eyes can’t stop talking to each other in a language I couldn’t even understand, it’s like whenever we both look into each other, my brain just stops its blood flow and the immaterial part of my muscled heart, and my eyes just race to find his eyes and just, stare at him.

I should probably choose a dress for this damn party.

Victoria’s voice cut through my reverie, “Ok, so now you’re going to his party, and then what…you just gonna stand there and wave at him…or…” she arched her eyebrows as she said,” You’re actually doing something there…or…someone there, huh?”

I picked up my phone from my table and I narrowed my eyes at her, her jet-black straight hair reflecting light on her screen “Ok, first of all, shut up. And two, I’m going there because he asked me to, okay, and yeah, I’ll probably stare at the wall and drink some wine or probably some beer and say hi to him. I am not going to “do” anyone, so can it!”

“Be real for a second. How long has it been since you actually got your back blown out?” I opened my mouth to make her stop but she continued, “Wait, never. So why don’t you actually get sum by a guy who presumably has fucked half of the Kook’s female population, I mean, he may have some STD but you can still ask him if he’s clean-”

“BYEE, VICKY. REMIND ME TO NEVER CALL YOU.”

“SUA VADIA. And DON’T FORGET, WRAP IT BEFORE YOU-”

The call got disconnected with a soft PLOP.

I threw the damned phone, my outfit, and then myself on my bed, the bedspring squeaking as my body hit the lavender comforter.

I cupped my hands on my face as I groaned as quietly as I could. I hate that she’s right. I hate that my thieving mind wanted to make out with a guy I just met.

Am I ovulating or is this how it really feels to have a crush on a guy on the daily?

In my twenty years of living and breathing oxygen, it is a joy and a slight humiliation that I have not had a proper sexual experience. I know I am way too young to even utter that sentence and I have all my life to experience “bodily pleasures” but the one time I made out with a guy was not “pleasurable” at all. It turns out that when you’re both eighteen, virgins, and have known each other for three years and then try “explore” each other, it becomes really awkward at some point when the other person can’t do a proper handjob and then you’re unsatisfied. Still, you can’t also tell that person cause you don’t wanna shame him.

Then the worst part comes.

You can’t even look him in the eyes the next day without turning beet red or wanting to sprint away from him yet you are stuck with him since he was your dance partner. Yeah, that technically means I am still a virgin.

However, a dark cloud passed over my memory as I thought about the implications of baring my body and soul if I give myself to a person. Murky thoughts. No, not thoughts but memories.

"Sofía, tienes un pecho perfecto… Para bailar, por supuesto" (Sofia, you have a perfect chest. For dancing, of course)

"Sofía, te ves muy gorda. No puedo creer que realmente te hayan dado permiso para estar aquí" (Sofia, you look so fat. Can't believe you actually got permission to be here)

"Veamos de cerca el cuerpo perfecto que mi papá nos dijo que tienes" (Let's look at the perfect body that my dad told us you have up close)

“SOFIAAA, I NEED HELP!”

I shot up as I saw Isabella, my youngest sister standing in front of my room, her walkman in one hand and her teddy bear, Beans in the other. The pink plastic tic-tac clips with charms shimmered as the light hit her hair; an adorable pout situated on her face that mirrored my features. Out of my twin sisters, Isabella “Ines” Ramirez has been endowed with my features: her oval face, chestnut brown eyes, and wavy black hair that curls around winter; my ma always says that she even smiles like me, eyes crinkling, dimples and all. She tumbled towards me and accompanied me on the bed, crashing beside me, sitting cross-legged amidst the mountain of all the clothes that I own.

“Sof, I need you to change this song, it keeps replaying. I wanna listen to Night Changes, not Kiss You.”

I take full responsibility for introducing Isabella to the best boyband ever, (yes, it is my subjective opinion but also it's a fact, get over it) when she was seven. It’s been three years yet she loves that band to death. Her side of the twins’ room, like any other fangirl, is filled to the brim with 1D merchandise; from her school bag, and pencil pouch to the spoon that she uses for cereal, she has been obsessed with those boys and I, for one, am ecstatic since I can sing along to One Direction in the car when I pick her up from school when Alejandra side-eyes both of us.

Both Isabella and Alejandra are ten now so my ma and pa are very stringent on using mobile phones or even any electronic devices. Isabella and Ajendra have second-hand walkmans that they can listen to music with headphones for 2 hours, (they can blast music on speakerphone anytime but my ma fears that they may get deaf by twenty-five if they excessively use headphones). Other than that, they can use a common laptop for one hour for “entertainment” purposes and only and only if they finish homework. Theo is sixteen now and so shamelessly uses the excuse “Pa, my homework is in the laptop, so just get me a new one” Well, he got a laptop but again, a secondhand one. We haven’t got the funds to buy him a new one but Theo was happy with what he got.

Isabella is not as tech-savvy as Alejandra and Alejandra has probably run to the neighbor’s house to do quilling with Brianna, her best friend. Alejandra is the “people’s princess” and befriends people in seconds; she is an extrovert to the core and spends her time folding colored papers into cranes and other crafty shapes, quilling, and being a Girl Scout. Meanwhile, Isabella is not as boisterous as my other sister; sure she is also pretty friendly and has a tight friend circle of five (I don’t even have that many people to call as “friends”) but sometimes she just likes to blast One Direction and Taylor Swift on full sound, dote on my parents, Theo and mainly me; and read books. But obviously, Alejandra is her favorite person in the world; after all, she is her twin. However, being #2 in her favorite list (I love it when she bashfully smiles and says “I love you all” when we joke about who’s her favorite) means she just likes to barge into my room when she’s bored or is confused about her walkman not working. Or sometimes she just comes into my room with the most random questions, expecting an answer from me when I am deadbeat from work.

“Sofi, where do fish go when they die in the sea?”

“Sofi, I wanna go to the big place in my geography book where there’s so much snow and bears that look white” (she’s talking about the Arctic and the polar bear by the way)

“Sof, why do people call taco, “taco?” (this question haunted me for nights cause same)

But I love to sit and answer her questions as much as I can since I know that time runs as fast as light does and I may regret not spending time with my siblings when they’re scrolling through TikTok ten years later and go non-verbal when I ask them, “How’s life?”.

The kook kids that I see at the restaurant in the country club make me feel scared for the sake of humanity, let me tell you. Unavailable parents combined with unfettered access to all the riches in the world, I feel so bad for those kids who try to fill the void their parents create but then they get rude with the waiters, and then I immediately lose my shred of empathy for them.

“Oh, Isa. Gimme your walkman. You probably might have clicked the replay button. Lemme disable it.”

Her hands tenderly gave me her device, the edges of the walkman smudged, losing its nude pink color. The harsh white light of the screen hurt my eyes for a second as I changed the settings in her Walkman, her chin resting gingerly on my shoulder. As I fidgeted to give her device back, she took a once over to my another possible outfit for the party; a spaghetti strap baby blue slip dress, flowery lace patterns stitched at the hem; the scooped up neckline accentuating my decolletage.

“Sofi, where are you all dressed up and going?”

I am going to a guy’s party to probably drink myself to the point of no return or flirting back at him while he just ends up hooking up with some other hot Kook.

“Oh, just to see a friend”

“Well, I hope you have fun, Sofia. I never see you going out that much since you came home from Mexico” her innocent voice airing out the pathetic state of my social life

Gosh, that’s a low blow and, that’s coming from a kid.

I knew her comment was innocent so I had to be the bigger person and say, “I will, thank you, Isa. By the way, stop clicking that button if you wanna listen to the whole playlist” It’s not she’s never been given a phone at all but the big sister part of me can’t help it.

Still, she listened and shook her head vehemently, “THANK YOU SOFI, YOU THE BEST” she screamed as ran back to her room.

Kids.

My attention went back to the task at hand as I helplessly stared at the gargantuan pile of dresses, hoping that an impeccable, show-stopping outfit would just magically appear out of thin air.

Should I just call Rafe and tell him that I am not coming to the party because I have periods…which I don’t.

I can just dip out of this very rare occasion of me socializing with people and I can spend my weekend like any other, munching on Takis as I watch YouTube compilations of ballerina dancers or a movie on an illegal website and, pester my ma as she cooks dinner at night and then I crash out on the bed, pensively contemplating about what could have been, should have been.

Or maybe I could face the music, stop feeling sorry for myself, and, go see Rafe at his party and try being a normal twenty-year-old girl, chat up a pretty boy, try to get sloshed, and maybe dip my toes in his pristine pool that he totally has. And maybe, maybe he’ll keep his word and be my tour guide and show me this “spot” that he was raving about.

Most importantly I am slightly enamored by his overall demeanor, the air of casual indifference seeping with his mysterious, almost quizzical lore surrounding him rendered me curious. The two times we met, the aquamarine-eyed boy’s ridiculous charm and, smiles and sugary words made me dissolve my barely-existing conscience.

Screw it, I am going to see what’s all the hype about a Kook party.

And the fact that I even thought of telling practically a stranger that I have periods…I gotta get better at being a socially functional human.

So with all the strength I had, I bundled all the clothes lying on my bed and crammed them into the unkempt wooden cupboard which already looked like it survived a hurricane with all of my underwear mixed with my work uniform with my other old clothes. As I closed it with my back facing the cupboard, my eyes caught the makeup box half opened on my vanity, the various shades of blushes, lip stains, and the half-finished concealer tube taunting my mind.

I walked over to the mirror, my eyes catching every blemish and dull spot on my face. There’s a new minute red spot on the apple of my cheeks and the crease underneath my eye is more prominent.

Ugh, why do my eyes always linger on the faults and why do I always wanna cover up the imperfections with caked-up makeup till the point that my tears wash away all the hard brushing I do over my face every day when I go to work?

I wish I would have said I didn’t let my insecurities win over my heart but my fingers grabbed the cherry red lip stain and, slathered it along my chapped lips and then fluffed the excess on my cheeks, hoping that the blush would cover my blemishes.

Ok, now I look…presentable. I twirled myself in front of the mirror, giving a final look at my ensemble, hoping that I wouldn’t change my outfit again. I took my brush combed the unkempt baby hairs and left my room, hastily climbing down the stairs, hoping that I wouldn’t regret the decision to say yes to Rafe Cameron’s party tomorrow.

That’s when I remembered. I forgot my phone and my purse.

Yikes. We are off to a good start.

************

A few hours ago, I promised myself that I absolutely wouldn’t change my dress, right?

That was a lie. I changed my mind and wore another dress.

As I took a peek of myself in the car mirror, I thought to myself for the millionth time, “How the hell did I end up here?”

My blue dress was replaced by a breezy coral red dress reaching up to the flesh of my thighs, the fabric littered with pink, orange, and yellow floral prints all over it. My red colored bra was playing peek-a-boo underneath the outfit, making my insides feel pretty sheepish. My makeup and hair were completely frazzled now, stray hairs having a party over my forehead and the lip stain lost its magic, leaving me with a very light pinkish-red hue on my lips. My blush was completely smudged off with a bare face and my mind spinning in excitement and anxiety,

As I parked my car over the spacious parking space adjacent to the lush gardens with trimmed grass and perfectly cut trees, I hoped that I didn’t look like my jaw was on the floor as I gawked at this mansion of a “house”

Goddamn, this guy’s place looks massive.

Tannyhill, in all its glory, stood tall and huge. With a capacious balcony and mint green paint radiating sunlight, the mansion screamed wealth and old money. I grabbed my purse tight as I leisurely walked into Rafe’s supposed “home,” hoping that I bump into him. I was in awe as I went in, the interior baffling me more. High ceilings, a chandelier with twinkling glass beads twinkling in the sun, a grand staircase with thick white marble railings in the middle, and a large wooden table in the center of the room with a large fireplace at one corner, the furnished shelf above it housing a plethora of photo frames.

The house was packed too, unknown faces crowding my view as they walked into the house with beers or solo red cups on their faces, bikini-clad bodies shimmying their hips and bobbing their head to Young Thug rapping on the enormous JBL speakers situated at one of the corners of the massive room.

I drudged around the crowd, too situate myself near the fireplace where the photos were there. Before I walked over to silently snoop at them, I felt a towering presence behind me.

“See something you like, Miss Sofia?”

I turned around at lightning speed, his baritone tone made me spin and there he was, the man of the hour, Rafe Cameron walking down the stairs, hands in his cornflower blue trousers and beige polo shirt, gold-lined aviators hiding those cheeky eyes and that smug smirk gracing his berry lips.

“Oh, I was just looking around, I didn’t mean to snoop.”

“Nah, you’re fine. I’m actually surprised that you showed up” he stood in front of me, his looming energy enveloping my vicinity.

“Well, I’m not the one for turning down polite offers. And I wanna see for myself how you party, so…” I wanted to thank him for inviting him but I stopped myself short. If we are going to play this back-and-forth game of flirty comments, he better start the serve.

“Now that you are here, lemme show you how we actually do things in Outer Banks. Follow me,” he beckoned me to join him as his long legs led me upstairs, my feet trying to catch up with his speed. The first floor looked more grand if that even makes sense. The walls were adorned with hand-painted lush flora, green leaves, and blue hydrangeas, and another smaller chandelier hanging in the middle of the room that led to the balcony on one side and four other rooms on the other.

We both crossed the threshold, now with a solo cup in my right hand as he turned towards me and said, “Now if you kindly follow Miss Sofia, the VIP Section.” he pointed towards the huge balcony overlooking the sea, two big brown sofas encircling a round table and multiple white chairs littering the area. It was so spacious that it could fit a party of thirty on that singular floor.

“Oh yeah.”

“Yeah, only very very very special people are allowed in here, as you can see,” he said as he put his hands on my shoulder and in turn, made my legs and arms into jelly.

He just casually put his hands on my shoulder and I just want to faint.

I could have just let my hands go limp but no, instinctually my arms went up to his clothed, chiseled shoulder blades, and smirked at his shameless flirting.

“Uh huh…” I shot back a teasing smile as I looked up at him.

He led me to the wooden railing; the view in front of me taking my breath away again. A horde of partygoers were just swaying to Drake booming on another speaker on the veranda down below with the DJ throwing random signs at the crowd, and a spotless beach situated just a few meters in front of the colonial mansion. Rafe caging me on one arm, pointed his other hand holding a solo red cup like me, toward the line of trees, its leaves crowning like it was the entrance of a fairyland, azure waters, frothy white waves jumping from a faraway distance. The golden ring, with some indescribable engraving, glimmered as he showed me around his place.

I was nearly smushed to his chest as he said, “As you can see, there’s the water,” I, too, looked around towards the directions he pointed as he continued, “Then there’s the beach. The next neighbor lives like a mile away from mine, it’s that private.”

Then his eyes went to the ongoing raucous at the party and he howled at the party under the balcony. He looked like he was having the time of his life, with everyone hollering at him, calling his name, and high-fiving him before we even reached upstairs minutes ago. Rafe Cameron seemed he was holding the world in his hands and I was witnessing it.

“Hey, that’s no Jim Beam Bullshit, alright. That’s Pappy Van Winkle, that’s like a day’s salary bro. AND IF YOU HAVEN’T GOT A DRINK IN YOUR HAND, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE”

I can’t help but openly laugh at his caveman-esque antics. Rafe was buzzed from alcohol and a flush to his cheeks. His hands were off of me now, leaving a gaping space that I never thought I felt before and then he took off his sunglasses and threw another smirk at me as he took off his sunglasses and slinked them on the collar of his polo.

I couldn’t help but say, “So, this is the VIP life, huh?”

His smile was soft as he said, “Yeah”

“Cool.”

We just looked at each other

“You wanna see some more?” he suggested. He’s all in for being my gracious host today, isn’t he? I didn’t wanna leave him and his infectious company so I was completely fine with him taking anywhere with me.

“Yeah, I’m down.”

His hands found purchase on my body once again as he said, “GREAT NEWS! THAT’S GREAT NEWS. Lemme show you the grand tour.” As we both started leaving the crowded room, a flash of blue nylon appeared on our side, stopping us.

“Don’t go runnin’” a buzz-cut man with harsh brown eyes and blue sneakers mentioned towards Rafe. He abruptly stopped for a minute and let go of me, now gently placing his hands on my shoulders.

“Hey, give me five minutes, I’ll come see you soon.”

I didn’t want to seem like a clingy pest but I was slightly down that our plans were cut off.

Stop it, Sofia. It’s only five minutes. Calm down, geez.

I played it safe and just said, “Okay.”

Both men now wore taut expressions as I walked out of the place, but then I heard the other guy screaming, “COUNTRY CLUB!!!”

Feeling explorative, my feet carried me downstairs to the veranda, planning to scout around the party as well as the mansion. They were playing Playboy Carti now, and everyone was slurring their words as the partygoers were all absolutely sloshed or probably coked up or high and it was only 6:30 pm.

Dazed and confused, I saw a girl eating Cool Ranch Doritos in the middle of the dancefloor, bobbing her head as the bass hit her eardrums.

Now that’s something I can vibe with.

If I am stuck in a party where I don’t know anyone but the host, might as well have some fun alone I guess. Fun, meaning finding the pantry or snack stash.

This is going to be a long day.

**********

I’m on my second pack of family-sized Red Hot Cheetos. And still on my first can of some random root beer.

And, I think most of the people here are mentally floating in some other dimension while I am observing them like some scientist but with toxic red dust on my chin.

It’s 8 pm.

Why am I still here, you may ask? Well, it was not like I was completely alone for an hour and a half, Rafe checked in on me every twenty minutes while I was sitting cross-legged on his kitchen counter. He actually came back ten minutes after I left him on the balcony

“Look who found the secret snack drawer.”

I indeed raided it just two minutes after going downstairs.

“Oh, is it ok? I don’t drink that much, not when I am alone at a party and don’t know anyone.”

“Yeah, go for it. Hey, I wanna apologize if I don’t stay with you at the party. I really want to but I-” he got cut off by another random person coming up at him and bumping chests with him, “HEYY RAFEE, MAN YOU’RE BACK!”

His attention diverted to the person in front of him but, his eyes stayed with me, apologetic as he got dragged again by that bleached blonde head who was accompanied by a throng of men who nearly trampled and took him away somewhere else.

That was an hour ago. He did try his best to come up to me once in a while but in a minute, he got approached by someone and he would bare his teeth for a minute and then switch up to greet them and then get yanked by his Kook friends. However, his vision was always on me even when he was knee-deep in another conversation, both of us playing a silent game of who would peel off their gaze first and, both of us were not backing down. We were both like two ends of a rubber band stretching out incessantly, anticipating when the band would snap, the tension creeping up over Rafe and me.

I was actually planning to leave fifteen minutes ago but, then Rafe came up to me, trudging through the horde of people across the room, panting and all, eyes glossier than ever, and rushed over his words, “Hey, I am so sorry that I didn’t spend enough time with you when I literally invited you. Just give me…fifteen minutes. I promise I’ll come back and really show the place around and, be with you.”

He looked so desperate that I couldn’t help but say, “Ok, I’ll wait. But it’s ok. I’ll leave if you are busy, clearly, you seem like the life of the party. And I don’t wanna impose…”

“No! Please, I…I’ll be back. Just stand here and look pretty like you have been doing for the past hour.”

Now, I’m here, hoping that he keeps his word or otherwise, I’m leaving in five minutes.

I sipped on my root beer; my feet dangling on the counter. If I am leaving without having fun, I’m at least taking this pack of root beer for funsies.

But as per his words, I saw Rafe stroll in my direction with a whiskey glass in his hand; all his attention centered on me. Once again, I felt bashful under his piercing gaze.

“Finally,” he breathed out, “now…where were we?” he downed his drink in one long gulp.

“I don’t know, it’s your rave, Mister Cameron”

“Well then, I promised you to show you around, right? Before that, let’s have a toast, shall we? Since it’s a party and all,” he maneuvered around the tight space; and took a tequila bottle and two shot glasses from the top shelf above the counter without even trying, his height towering over my relatively shot frame. His biceps bulged as he held the bottle poured two shots into the glasses and offered it to me while sporting a small smile.

My mind is spinning in circles over his tall frame. And I haven’t even gotten drunk yet.

He was near me now, his hands inviting me to get off the counter and I took it, the ground underneath me withering for the third time today as he held his hands in mine. His hands felt comfortably warm in contrast to my ice-cold ones.

“Bottoms up, Miss Sofia"

I was heavily invested in his game now, his risque charm pulling me in at a dangerous speed.

“Bottoms up, Rafe” We both clinked our glasses, downing our drinks in one go at the same time.

Game on, I guess.

************

I lost count of how many shots of neat tequila I had, how many lime wedges my teeth bit into, or even the consecutive gulps of gin I guzzled. All I can comprehend is the calloused fingers digging into my hips as my body is glued against Rafe Cameron who, indeed gave an extensive tour of the house but my conscience was all up in the air. He took me to every room of the mansion and gave a one-line description of each room but I was invested in his booming voice, the way his eyes glimmered underneath the soft lights (which were hurting my eye now, cuz I am so close to getting pissed as hell) and the way he never let go of my hands. All I did was nod vigorously and throw in some flyaway comments like, “That’s nice,” and “Hmm…interesting.”

We were on the dance floor now, the DJ blasting “Often” by the Weekend, and, both of us stood at arm's length, our inebriated bodies slowly staggering to the beat. The sober me would have been appalled of me throwing my head back and staggering from side to side but here I am, dancing my heart out with Rafe watching me over like a hawk. His eyes were piercing as he stood with a red solo cup, looking at me like he was ready to pounce on me. And I was enthralled by the attention he was showering on me.

Fuck, for the first time in my life, my twisted heart is carnally desiring something.

At one point, the minuscule distance between us was reduced to nothing, as he tugged my tipsy self to his chest, his arms seizing my waist and we both started to sway to the sultry beat drops, basically grinding on each other. My arms crept up to his nape, my head discovering my latest favorite place to rest; his chiseled, clothed chest. Air became precious when I could hear our breaths blend in, our chests heaving in insurmountable tension.

His voice shook me to my core as he deliberately whispered in my ear, “Do you wanna go swimming in the pool?”

No, I want to keep feeling your skin on mine but I was too stunned to say no to his out-of-the-blue proposition.

“Yeah, ok,” I murmured like no one was present when the party was going on in full swing

I thought I would wobble my way to the pool outside but Rafe Cameron had other plans.

Effortlessly, he picked me up by my waist and placed me in my his arms.

Not just anyway.

Bridal style.

I was being carried by Rafe Cameron bridal style.

If I didn’t faint then, I was going to fall into an unshakable stupor now.

My heart weighed as a cloud; his hold on my body was light as a feather. My body softly thudded with each step he took toward the glimmering swimming pool and with it, my adrenaline slowly spiked. My back could feel the chlorine emanating from the water as Rafe neared the pool, his face reflecting the scintillated shine; cerulean blue eyes turning aquamarine in the warm July night. He let me down gently near the steel steps directed towards the pool; the cold tiled floor causing shivers in my feet.

With no time to waste, he peeled off his polo shirt leaving me no imagination of his sculpted chest; abs chiseled and, a prominent V-line trailing over his limbs.

Holy smokes.

“Like what you see, Miss Sofia”

“I’ll let you know later, Cameron,” I shot back as I bared off my excuse of a dress, leaving me with my red bikini. Rafe who witnessed me taking off my clothes in the most unsexy fashion shamelessly stared at me, wandering eyes trying to capture every part of my body.

“Now do you like what you see, Rafe?”

“Very much”

Fuck, he ain’t slick.

“So what now?”

“Now,” he took a once over at the pool and started to run towards it, body curling into a cannonball as he went airborne and hit the water with a big SPLASH, “we swim. I thought that was obvious, Miss Sofia. I wanted to show you the beach but hey, we both are way too tired to walk till there and swim so why not bring the beach experience, here?”

I just shook my head from side to side, drunkenly giggling and went near the stairs to go into the pool, Rafe also swimming along with me. As I climbed down into the chill waters, Rafe rushed towards me, grabbed my hands, and pulled me into his side for the second time tonight. His body felt warm against the cold swimming pool. My arms found home in his nape again, my nimble fingers softly grasping on the matted buzzcut. A tingly sensation flared up on the inside of my thighs and my heart.

Space was a foreign concept between us as we both clung to each other, Rafe holding me by the flesh of my thighs and hoisting me up to his level. I was putty in his hands, both of our bodies floating in some random flow like two leaves gliding in a river.

“So, how was the premium Rafe Cameron experience?”

“It was satisfying, to say the least. But I wish the host was more sober…”

“Heyy…”

“Kidding, kidding. No, but really, thank you, Rafe. This is the most fun I have ever had in a very very long time.”

I have never seen him smile that shyly, eyes downcast as he said, “Well, I’m glad to tell you that the fun has just started, Miss Sofia…” he let go of me as he had a sinister look in his eye.

“What are you scheming…Rafe…”

“Oh…nothing,” his lips turned into an upward chuckle as he started to push the water in my direction with all his might and splashed it in my direction, the buoyancy of the water making me lose my balance; and I slipped into the water.

“AHHH! RAFE, YOU SNEAK!”

“HAHA,” his cackle cut through the combined hum of the party as well as the silent night. I staggered for a moment and held my breath for a moment inside the pool.

If he wants to play with me, might as well give him a run for his money.

He caught on to my disappearance and panic slightly flooded his features. I felt the water sloshing as Rafe looked around, silently called me, “Sof, you ok? Hey, Sof. SOFIAAA…”

Poor guy must have thought I drowned or something. Well, I might if I keep staying like this for a few more seconds,

I rose out of the water, my bangs completely drenched and my face splotched red as I took deep breaths and tackled him, the water swishing in ripples as I latched onto his body.

“BOO!”

“JESUS SOF, My God, I thought you drowned or something.”

Worry was etched onto his face now, regret filling into those eyes that I can’t stop thinking about for no reason at all. I felt bad now and immediately cradled his head, “Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you properly, ok. I just wanted to get back at you for splashing water at me. I’m ok, Rafe.”

“Well, don’t do it again, ok”

Fuck, I ruined the mood. Sometimes, I wonder if there’s another nameless entity in my brain forging the most horrible decisions ever.

I snaked my arms around him, hoping that my hug would at least emulate my regret. He didn’t hesitate to hug me back, his arms imprisoning me in a sweet deadlock. We stayed in that position for a few minutes, nothing but silence speaking our thoughts out into the ether. As much as I loved being intertwined with the blonde who had been afflicting my dreams, I started to shrivel from the freezing cold pool water and let out a small ACHOO.

He was the one who pulled away, noting my incessant shivering and pruning body, “Come on, we should leave. Shit, you’re trembling.”

We both waggled our way back to the edge of the pool and got up the stairs, aware that Rafe ogled at my drenched body as I left the pool. The bikini lost its opaqueness, the translucent flimsy red material sticking on my body like second skin. He got out of the pool after me, head dripping with water but held a burning fire in his eyes. Rafe wasted no time and began rushing me inside the mansion through the backdoor; I was worried that I would be exposing my body to a bunch of drunk teenagers. However, Rafe quelled my rising insecurities when he snatched his polo shirt and draped it on me when we reached the threshold, quietly putting my hands on the sleeve holes of his shirt. My skin burned whenever he touched, making me shiver in heat.

“I have some towels in my room, dry yourself off,” he muttered as he took me in the direction of the staircase, bypassing the party which was slowly dwindling down, the DJ playing a very random song in some unknown language and only a few people littering the living space, slowly sipping on alcohol, the stench of weed and cigarette infiltrating my nostrils.

We entered a peacock-blue room up the stairs, a massive bed with a long mahogany bedframe occupying the space front and center, lustrous teal blue sheets covering the pristine crisp white bed springs. The sofa and chairs was cluttered with clothes and other stuff and a tall sliding door situated right infront of the bed hidden by coffee-colored curtains with a bathroom attached to its left.

As he shut the door, leaving only the two of us in the confined space; breathing itself became a chore, my lungs caving in and heart thrumming with anticipation and pure desire. I was standing near his wooden drawer as he went in to the bathroom to get two towels. The stretch of the rubber band felt excruciatingly painful; the tension melting my soul every second. My thoughts started to jumble into one mess that craved for his touch on me, my mind wanting him to cross the distance and end my arduous yearning for a kiss from his lips or even, a graze from his hands. His stormy eyes and alluring body rounded on me as he ambled towards me, his walk having a sure purpose; two cotton towels on his hand. His presence cornered me, my back hitting the drawer. I can sense his body heat radiating off of him, the mix of his perfume and natural musk making me heady with want.

He gingerly gave me the towel, my hands sizzling with current as my hands lightly grazed his. We both looked into each other, square in the eye as we started to dry our bodies by ourselves. I threw the towel on my hair, feeling the dampness of my chlorinated hair transfer onto the soft towel and slowly rung my hair on the towelletel; my vision cut off by the piece of cotton blocking my eyes. When I felt sure that my hair was more-or-less semi dry, I took off the towel from my head and found Rafe heavily breathing down on me, his angled nose nearly plunging into my hair.

It felt like life rolled in slow motion as he threw the cloth away from my hands, and put his hands on the door behind me. Rafe’s voice purred in my ear as he said, “You look so pretty, Sofia. Fuck, I can’t stop looking at you all night,” he breathed into my hair as he spoke, “You even smell good, you know how hard it was for me to focus on other shit when all I think about was you in those little white bra and panties with the bow. It’s all I have been thinking about since yesterday with kissing you senseless, and fuck, I can’t even erase the memory of you in your uniform. ”

I looked upto him and saw that his eyes were feasting on my picked on lips, my breasts with his digits digging into the flesh of my hips. I was stupefied too; I couldn’t stop memorising every detail of him; the curve of his Adam’s apple, the defined planes of his face, the sharp ears, the matted blonde strands of his buzzcut, the small freckle under his left eye and those eyes.

Those cereaulean blue eyes glimmering like sapphire; I knew from that moment that they wouldn’t stop haunting me till I am dragged down to my casket.

I couldn’t even slip out a coherent sentence to his confession but my heart was on fire, but all I could muster was, “Rafe?”

“Hmm,” his voiced with laced with pain as he spoke to me.

I knew that this was the moment that my life was going to change forever.

I felt possessed as I said, “Can you kiss me, please, Rafe? I want to stop playing this game.”

The rubber band snapped and recoiled.

“Thought you would never ask, Miss Sofia”

Inches of space got reduced to nothing as he crashed his lips onto mine; his mouth lapping mine up with urgent fervor almost as he was worshipping me by pressing his lips on mine with undulated passion. The kiss felt earth shattering, the earth beneath me felt like it was going to break into pieces and take me away and Rafe’s lips and wandering hands were the only thing keeping me sane and tethered to reality. His lips swallowed my mouth, pouring all his fervor onto me, and my lips couldn’t get enough; chasing his lips like we’re both running from a disaster. The world went utterly still with only the sounds of our kiss, hands cradling each other hips and heads and mouths nearly gnawing each other with such intensity and devotion.

I never thought kissing someone would feel heavenly. Well, I wish I told that girl I was about to get my world rocked by Rafe Cameron.

Forever.

AN:

My brain and my fingers after typing this chapter:

FINALLY DUN DUN DUN! THEY KISSED. YK WHAT IT MEANS FOR NEXT CHAPTER, your girl is going to try writing mid ass smut...Pls dont stone me to death for this chapter, the next one and the futures ones too.

THE AMOUNT OF LOVE YOU GUYS GIVE ME IS AMAZINGGG. KISSES TO EACH SINGLE ONE OF YOU. MWAHHH. Any comments or likes or reblogs are absolutely appreciated.

The next update...I genuinely don't know when it's happening but I am always thinking about this story so hopefully within this month.

Hope you guys have a good new yearr...BYEEEE

Taglist:

@lostsyren @araybiaaa @cherubfille @didddii589 @popou61 @rafecameronsfavourite @rafesofiapalomo @me-ig1 @beautyinsteadofashes

#obx fanfiction #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron #sofia obx #rafe x sofia #drew starkey #fiona palomo #Spotify

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acourtofquestions · 3 months ago

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“She had no magic to wield, save for the keen eyes of the goddess at her shoulder and an uncanny ability to remain unnoticed, to play into expectations.”

#Chapter 23 #Kingdom of Ash #Sarah J. Maas #Lorcan Salvaterre #Elide Lochan #Elorcan #no spoilers please first read to read along with me #more notes quotes annotations & reacts in the tags spoilers for the chapter & book in post & tags of course pt 2 of 4 perspectives #Lorcan had never felt the weight of the hours so heavily upon him-I FEEL IT 2poor Rowan must feel this 247HURRY where’s Elide?hold on Aelin!#And to send Elide into Maeve's clutches--it had taken all of his will to let her walk away.😭#If Elide was captured if she was found out he wouldn't hear of it know of it. — you’d know cause she’s your mate idiot (I love you idiot #without proving their worth they could still visit--briefly. — ugh Maeve why does everything about you suck so much #If she emerged. — COME ON ELIDE — I CANT HANDLE ANOTHER CAIRN-NAPPING #the Prince of the North and the Lion the protector and the ever impatient in love idiot we all love Lorcan #He knew some of them. Had commanded them. Were they now his enemy? — they are all having some inner morality battles #What manner of birds? Raptors mostly — none from the House of Whitethorn — they fought for him on the other borders… for her🥹😭them #why so many guards if no Aelin hmm???? SHES HERE GUYS #though Gavriel kept glancing to the tattoos inked on his hands. How many more lives would he need to add before they were through?#Aelin had been trained to endure torture. Elide... He could see those scars on her from the shackles. — how about we save them both?😭🖤#She had endured too much suffering and terror already. He couldn't allow her to face another heartbeat of it--#Rowan and his random hatchet now😅😂 it’s giving my wife is gone unhinged in the woods with the bros might become a horror movie vibes #But then a two-note whistle echoed and Lorcan's legs wobbled so violently he sat back onto the rock where he'd been perched-OH MY ELORCAN😭🖤#also Lorcan… perched??? isn’t that bird boy Rowan’s thing?😅😂🤣#her cheeks rosy in the cool night air. — cheeks pink in the twinkling lights tell me bout the first time you saw me (shipping in insanity)#She was fine. She was unhurt. There was no enemy on her tail. Elide's eyes met his. Wary and uncertain. I met someone.#THANK GOD — but also wait WHAT-when?WHO?HOW?#also this quote posted is like one of the reasons I love Elide #another grand Maasverse enterance is on its way?#the fact the opening line shows that being sold out to Maeve is the same as death — OH GET TO AELIN ALREADY PLEASE #no more tattoos guys — what’s with Maeve’s wolves — isn’t dark haired beauty what Elide called the girl in the caravan so maybe it’s her

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congolese-kitty · 7 months ago

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y'all.

how stupid would it be for me to uhaul with this girl i met last month. just had a giant ass wrench thrown in my housing plans so i'm on my own for that now but the possibility has crossed my mind

#clearly very stupid #don't mind me i just want to put the thought out #i have also met her a grand total of 2 times where one time we spent more time sucking each other's faces off and dancing than talking #bc it was at a bar. this was just a thought don't worry i'm not actually entertaining it....but what if?#lesbian relationship speed run x 100 #OH OH AND SHE JUST BROKE UP W HER EX #she told me that after we made out. that they broke up two days before #but also she practices non-monogamy so she still has a girlfriend. it was the primary she had a breakup with.#idk i need to see where her head is at. all i know is she is looking for housing too. but seeing the budget she set and knowing #how much this city charges....it wasn't adding up #yknow i never want to live with romantic partners just because i need my space but at this point i lowkey kind of like the idea 🤷🏾‍♀️#dw guys i'm not seriously considering this hahaha #god #mew #cat chat

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mccoys-killer-queen · 1 year ago

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It's hard to explain why I love Styx all of a sudden but i think part of it boils down to the fact that they were around me my whole life growing up and I never knew it and now that I'm realizing they were always there and not too far away it's like I'm getting to re-meet someone for the first time but in the way it was always meant to be? like "hey it's about time we finally met, I heard so much about you!"

#like i distinctly remember hearing come sail away and renegade on the radio as a TODDLER #and too much time on my hands was just always a radio song i heard #and even fuckin high enough was part of the local radio station bumper #and i never knew that was tommy i was listening to every day #its like in doctor who when Ten and Donna are like SO CLOSE to crossing paths but it never happens?#and then it finally does?#well that's where i'm at right now #or like in How i meet your mother when Ted finally meets the mother #and they immediately realize fate brought them together and they just kinda go 'hi!' at each other #like 'oh my god how have we never met before ??'#anyway i'm feeling a lot again #styxposting

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phagodyke · 2 years ago

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actually ive been thinking abt this a lot lately like basically for years i assumed i was very (cis)het passing and only recently ive become aware that i am in fact. very obviously perhaps almost comically gay to other queer ppl. like lmaoooo ok then

#i think its bc a) when i came out at like 15 everyone was super surprised so i assumed ppl still found it unexpected even now #+ b) im not super aware of social cues generally (autism) so dont tend to pick up on stuff like that unless its explicitly said #+ also c) ive never felt like i physically appear very conspicuous bc i dont have any piercings/tattoos/never dyed my hair etc #i only cut my hair short relatively recently too..... so idk i just assumed i blended into the background for everyone #but now im interacting with ppl outside of my tighter social circle more often ive become more aware-#of how ppl might perceive me. or rather ive become aware of just how UNaware i am of how ppl might perceive me #and its really funny how many odd interactions ive had in the past suddenly make sense if u assume the other person clocked me as gay #like strangers that have gotten flustered around me that might be bc i was giving off strong dyke vibes etc #the other day i was in a bookstore and the guy behind the counter was very stiff + quiet until i replied to smth he said and suddenly he-#became way more animated + started talking to me more casually + that was the first time i realised i probably sound gay as fuck #like i think i kinda have a stereotypical gay mannerism/lilt to the way i talk... no wonder i used to get called a fag so often lmfao #or like i remember trying to find a lab partner in 3rd yr of my degree + i had to do it on call only bc of covid + there were a bunch-#of us with similar lab interests but it got sorted SO fast bc this one other student seemed to gravitate immediately towards me #and i remember thinking afterward that it was odd how quickly we resolved that. esp bc we didnt even meet it was just voice call #anyway yeah i found out she was a dyke much later but i think maybe she clocked me straight away bc of how i sound....?#and that was why she warmed to me so quickly... but god i remember debating for ages with my ex abt whether she was gay or not #like my gaydar is truly terrible i suck balls at picking up on cues so its funny that to some people im reeking signals #also i met up with an ollldddd old friend last week + 30 secs in she was like oh fuck you must use different pronouns now #gesturing to Me. like oh..... im visibly gnc......? or maybe behaviourally???? idk. also shes v femme which made me realise that-#i rly do come across kinda masc/butch nowadays. even tho ive never really thought abt it that deeply before or made an effort to #i mean yeah i do identify along those lines but ive never directly considered how to flag that to other people etc im just doing me baby #ANYWAY this has been a rly long ramble idr what point i was getting at but just find it fascinating to think abt how im read in public #bc im just genuinely so unaware of it. its weirdly rly validating to find out that im automatically recognised as dykey + a little masc #boosted my confidence a lot as well tbh ive felt rly comfortable in myself lately. partly also cuz im getting a little muscular ;^)#ANYWAYYYYYY enough of all that i need to go sleep if youre reading this ily goodnighttt xoxo #.diaries

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classyrbf · 2 months ago

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IS THERE SOMEONE ELSE! — GOJO SATORU

SYNOPSIS...you and gojo get into a fight after realizing that he’s been hiding something about your relationship the entire time

INFO...gojo x fem!reader, angsty, arguing, breaking up(?), not proofread

OTHER...likes and reblogs are appreciated

You slam the door to the penthouse, your heels clicking against the mahogany floors with each step. You toss your purse on the couch, hearing Gojo opening the front door and shutting it quickly. “Baby, please just listen to me.” He pleads, following after you.

“I don’t wanna hear your bullshit excuse, Satoru.” You roll your eyes, plopping down on the edge of the bed to relieve your sore feet of the heels you’ve been wearing all night to your boyfriends opening event he’s been planning for months now.

“I’m not trying to make excuses. Please.” He walks over towards you and toss your heel at him. “Stop throwing shit and just talk to me!”

“You don’t get to tell me what to do!” You stand to your feet, glaring daggers at him. “Do you know how embarrassing that was for me? God, you’re a fucking asshole.” You seethe, narrowing your eyes. “I sat there all alone, while you let some woman feel up on you the entire night? Are you out your fucking mind?” You scoff.

“She’s just an old friend, y/n. I swear I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.” He shakes his head at you, grabbing onto your arms tightly.

“Oh, yeah? So I when I came up and introduced myself as your girlfriend none of your friends were looking at me like I was crazy? I know we’ve been only together for a year, Satoru, but that’s fucking low.” You pull away from him. “They didn’t even know who I was. Then you got miss prissy bitch clearly flirting with you in front of me and you didn’t do a damn thing to stop it!” You brush past him, stomping over towards the bathroom.

“Slow down, y/n! Baby—”

“I’m not your fucking ‘baby’, Satoru.” You gather all of your products from the bathroom, from your makeup and skincare to your clothes and shampoo.

“Stop for just one second.” He spins you around so you’re facing him. “Don’t leave. I swear you’re the only girl for me. I know I fucked up, I know I did. I embarrassed you, made you look stupid and I am so fucking sorry. But please do not leave.” He cups your face gently and his touch feels so inviting, but you can’t forgive him that easily. “I only want you. I only need you.”

You look up at him through your lashes, swallowing thickly as you bite the inside of your cheek. “Should’ve thought about that when you let her kiss your cheek and you smiled at her. Right in front of me. Get the fuck off of me.” You push him, rushing to grab your bag from the closet.

Gojo lets out a tired sigh, following you. He wasn’t going to let you go. Not like this. “I shouldn’t have let her near me.”

“Why was she so comfortable with being that close to you, huh?” You question, furrowing your brows as you turn to look at him. “Now that I think about it. Let me guess, you two were more than just friends.” You stand to your feet, snatching your clothes off the hangers and shoving them into your bag. He looks at you, opening his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. And from the look in his eyes, you already knew the truth. A bitter laugh leaves your lips, shaking your head in disappointment.

“It was before you! Before us! We never dated it was just a small thing between me and her!” He tried to explain. “Baby, I swear! Once I met you, everything changed. I cut her off and focused all my attention on you. You’re the only who has my heart.” He grabbed your wrist only for you to pull away.

“Clearly I ain’t the only who who’s got your dick, though.” You slam the closet door shut, turning your back towards him.

“Don’t say that, y/n. That’s the first time I’ve seen her in years!”

“Yeah? Well all your friends sure know about her. She must’ve been great in bed, Satoru. Me? Well, they looked at me like I was a fucking ghost!” You scoff. “Like I was some delusional bitch who came up to you and said I was your girlfriend!” You throw your hands up in disbelief. “You must take me for fucking joke. It must be written on my forehead or something!”

“I don’t take you for a joke! You’re my goddamn girlfriend. You live with me. You have my initial around your fucking neck! I love you and you know that!” He takes a step towards you.

“Do I know that?” You ask aloud, cocking your head to the side.

“What—of course I love you. What the fuck are you saying?” He looked at you with pure confusion.

“You’re a joke. One of your friends, Shoko, pulled me aside and told me the only reason you got with me is because your little fling ended up getting a boyfriend herself around the time we started dating. You’re a piece of shit.” You revealed the truth to him, watching him stare at you blankly, lost for words. “Think I wouldn’t find out?” You ripped off the necklace with his initial, tossing it at him.

“Yes, I was upset that she got a boyfriend but—”

“So you had feelings for her. And just to cover them up, you got with me as a distraction.” You step closer towards him. “Listen to me, Satoru, don’t ever try and contact me again, keep whatever fucking gifts you bought me and return them, sell them, do whatever because I am done,” you spoke through gritted teeth.

“No, no, no, baby. You can’t leave me. Yea I liked her before, but so fucking what? I was never in love with her, not like I am with you. I was too fucking stupid. I still am! Just give me another chance to fix this. I don’t want us to end this way.” He grabs your packed bag from your hands and tosses it on the bed.

“Let me go, Satoru.”

“No,” he shakes his head, “I can’t. You’re everything to me. She’s nothing compared to you.” He sniffles, holding your hands in his. “I love you so much and I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you the truth. I’m sorry I embarrassed you. And I’m sorry for entertaining the idea that she could even come close to you. She can’t.” His hands cupped your face, his heart pounding in anticipation as he waited to hear any words from you.

You reached up, pulling his hands away from your face. “Bye, Satoru.” You walked past him, grabbing your bag off of the bed. As much as it hurt to leave, you knew you had to respect yourself. Time and space was what you needed to think. With each step out the door, you could hear Gojo’s sobs, something you’ve never heard before in the year you’ve been with him. For the strong, flashily and confident man he is, you never once thought you’d see or him break down. Especially not for you.

#—☆classyrbf #jjk #jjk x reader #jujustu kaisen #gojo x reader #jjk angst #jjk x reader angst #gojo x reader angst #gojo angst #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader angst #gojo satoru angst #jjk angst oneshot #gojo angst oneshot #gojo x you #gojo satoru x you #gojo x y/n #gojo satoru x y/n

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misaamoure · 4 months ago

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𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭:

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝…!

⋅ ˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅

𝐒𝐲𝐥𝐮𝐬:

“Yes,” Sylus threw his head back, exposing his adam’s apple. “Just like that.”

Things had gotten a little heated on the couch in the living room.

You two had been watching this old ass movie tied to a soundtrack in Sylus’s vinyl collection as a pastime, and had clearly gotten distracted.

He had been very periodic and methodical with his caresses and touched, before finally leaning over and whispering in your ear, “instead of watching a movie, why don’t we make one?”

Stupid. How predictable.

Sylus was beyond hot though, so you let it slide.

Turning away for a moment to roll your eyes, you swing your leg over his lap to straddle him.

And that’s how you two ended up here.

You’d never had a makeout session so intense.

You felt his hands all over you… you felt like you were on fire.

You were also more than positive that your wetness had leaked all the way through your panties and pants.

“Oh!”

Your train of thought was interrupted when Sylus thrusted right up into you.

It felt so good… you could feel his hard dick pressing right into your clit.

“You shouldn’t give away what you like so easily, sweetie,” He gave one last squeeze to your tits before moving his hands down to grip your waist. “You’re giving me such a large advantage.”

Jesus Christ he talks too damn much.

You didn’t particularly feel like arguing with him today. Sure, it could be fun, but what you really wanted was to shut him up.

Deciding to take the initiative, you repositioned yourself to sit right on his hard dick, and started to roll your hips back and forth.

Sylus inhaled sharply, something you didn’t miss.

Grinding on him slowly and sensually, you feel his hands twitch on your waist as you kissed down his jawline to give his neck a sharp bite.

The sound of Sylus’s heavy breathing and moaning only egged you on further.

“Fuck, kitten,” He shut his eyes tightly, throwing his head back. “Wait…”

Sylus was going fucking crazy.

Why did it feel so good? It was just a little kissing and grinding.

He suddenly felt like a horny teenager all over again.

But it felt so fucking good… you felt so fucking good. Rarely did you ever have the chance to get on top like this.

Maybe he should let you do it more often.

It was so out of character for him, to be moaning and panting like this. His head was a mess.

His boxers were a mess too, all the precum he had been leaking.

The electrifying feeling of your wet cunt dragging over his cock was driving him over the edge quicker than he’d like to admit.

“Wait, please,” Sylus felt fucking neurotic, begging like this. “Y/N… wait…”

It wasn’t long after that Sylus felt himself cum in his pants. Hard.

Holding you tightly by the waist and panting up a storm.

Oh my god… there’s no way he…?

You quickly sat up on your knees, lifting yourself off of his lap to see with your own two eyes.

And he did! There was an unmistakable wet spot right where his dick was.

Fuck… it was so erotic.

𝐙𝐚𝐲𝐧𝐞:

Unintentional dry spells. It was common between you and Zayne.

He was always busy at the hospital and you were constantly running around to kick wanderer ass.

But you two always made that lost time up.

In fact; you can say with full confidence that you preferred the sex after the build up.

There was a particular intensity that came with it that simply couldn’t be replicated.

Nobody else saw Zayne with this level of passion but you.

It was his day off and he had invited you over.

While you two had been once sitting on his couch, things had began to get heated after Zayne initiated a kiss with you, stating how much he missed you.

It was rare for him to verbalize exactly what he felt so boldly.

Oh he was so sweet. The sweetest man you’d ever met.

Cut to you being on top of him with him laying on the couch below you.

You don’t even remember when you got on top of him. Well… not that it mattered.

Not when he was making you feel this good. He was the only thing on your mind at the moment.

“Y/N… please,” You felt his grip on your waist tighten as he squeezed his eyes shut. “Wait…”

Hearing him beg and plead with you was making you unbelievably wet.

You didn’t want to stop. You couldn’t stop. It was too good. And you’d been waiting for him for hours.

With every pass of Zayne’s hard cock over your clothed clit you became more and more aggressive.

“I’m not going to last like this,” He said breathlessly. “Please, my love, enough…!”

Oh my god was it your birthday?

Making Zayne cum in his pants sounded maddening.

He was under you losing his mind.

Zayne could feel how wet you were through all the layers you two were wearing.

The delicious friction of how perfectly you were grinding on him was bringing him to his climax all too quickly.

“Y/N… I’m-”

Digging his fingers into your hips, Zayne came all into his boxers.

Shit… you drove him crazy.

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giannaln4 · 2 months ago

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GIANNA'S KINKTOBER '24 SEASON

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Kinktober day sixteen.

Breeding Kink (3.2k words)

summary: Since the moment he met you, Lando knew he wanted you to be the mother of his children, and that feeling only intensified when he saw taking care of your nephew.

warnings: NSFW, +18, smut, MDNI, established relationship, unprotected sex, creampie, dirty talking, breeding kink.

To anyone else, and as people would expect, seeing your significant other with a child should warm your heart; it should give you a soft spot for the person you’ve vowed to spend the rest of your life with.

Lando did feel like that when he saw you interact with any kid, like when you were walking in the paddock and a kid came up to him and you always made conversation so they wouldn’t feel so shy, or when a driver brought their kid to the race and you immediately leaned down to talk to them, sometimes even holding their tiny hands as they swore they had the coolest thing to show you.

That was the first few times, at least. But he will never forget how everything inside him shifted when you first met his niece. She instantly fell in love with you, and she needed to drag you everywhere. Who could blame her, really; that’s just the effect you have on people.

But god, the effect you had on him? That was another level, because the way he felt that weekend when you picked up a motherly role when you were with her made him feel something he had never felt before, something he never imagined, and quite honestly, he couldn’t explain it. That was until you were saying goodbye and the little girl nearly cried when her mother took her from your arms, and his hands instinctively landed on your tummy when he walked you back to the car.

The thought of you carrying his child and taking care of them the same way you did with his niece — now that is a fire he could never put out, not until it became a reality. He wanted- no, he needed to make you a mother; he desperately needed to put a baby in you in a way that was almost primal.

You and Lando have been together for years, and it was common knowledge that he wanted kids. Sure, you have talked about having a family one day after getting married, one day, but sometimes he just wishes you could skip all of that and make a baby once and for all.

For months, he kept those thoughts to himself, not wanting to ruin what you had just because he couldn’t contain his desire buried for a little longer; that was until you babysat your 5-year-old nephew, Charlie.

He came back home sometime in the afternoon, eyes tired and body aching for the intensity of the past weeks. He wanted nothing more than to be with his girlfriend and forget about the world, but as soon as he stepped into your apartment, he heard the TV and loud chuckles coming from the living room.

His brows frowned in confusion as he dropped his bags next to the door and followed the noise, his heart nearly stopping when he spotted you playing with the little kid.

“Hey, what’s going on here?” He said with a huge smile.

“Oh hi, you’re home,” you sprinted towards him, hugging him tightly when he caught you in his arms. “I’ve missed you.”

“Missed you too, sweetheart,” he kissed your temple. “And how is this little guy doing?" Lando walked towards Charlie, kneeling next to him to be at the same level.

“Good, we are playing with the puppies,” he exclaimed, his tiny finger pointed at the TV.

“Yeah? Are they fun?” He just nodded and ran closer to the glowing screen, completely forgetting about Lando’s existence and jumping again as his tired eyes followed the dogs.

“Don’t worry, my sister will pick him up in a couple of hours.”

“It’s fine. He seems happy.”

“And very tired. I think it's time for a nap, what do you say?” You walked towards him, trying to pick him up, but he refused.

“No! I wanna play racing again.”

“We can play some other time, I promise.”

He looked up at you, the corners of his mouth turning down as his eyes quickly filled with tears. He shook his head and ran back to Lando, who was still on his knees, as he caged himself in his arms.

“I wanna play racing,” he repeated, this time to your boyfriend, sniffling and wiping his tears.

“Yeah? We can play for a little while.”

“Lando-” The way he just betrayed you, you would never forgive him.

“He’ll want to go to sleep soon, don’t worry.” You saw them walk to Lando’s streaming room, Charlie skipping as he held his hand.

You rolled your eyes and followed them, crossing your arms as you rested against the door frame. Lando tried to pick him up, intending to sit him in the sim, but he nearly lost his mind, as if Lando had no idea how playing racing worked.

“No! Auntie.” Lando freaked out and out and put him back down, looking at you as he begged for your help with a single look.

“I’m right here, sweetie.”

You stepped closer to them, sitting on the chair as you picked him up and put him on your lap. He was happy again, his little feet kicking in the air as he gripped the steering wheel.

“We’ll do one more, okay?”

“Yes!” He happily exclaimed.

Lando watched the both of you in awe as you started the game, showing Charlie all the cool cars he could choose from.

“I want the blue car again!” He said, pointing at the Red Bull. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” Lando joked. You giggled at this, but chose the Red Bull for the race.

It was a free practice session, so you weren’t actually racing other cars, but you still got to drive it super fast, which is exactly what he liked.

As the session started, you placed your hands just below his. You were doing all the work, but the illusion was still there.

It was a little harder to drive like this, but you still managed to put up a few good laps without messing up too much, but even when you did, he was enjoying it, giggling and pointing at the screens as he turned to Lando to ask him an excited “did you see that?” Any time something happened, and every time, Lando would just nod and match his enthusiasm.

The session ended, and just like you did earlier today, you congratulated your nephew for his amazing driving. He took the compliments proudly as if he just won a championship, but his head soon fell on your chest, yawning as he snuggled closer.

“Okay, time for a nap.”

He didn’t resist this time. Instead, he nodded as his eyes closed. Lando helped you get up as you held Charlie close to you, walking towards the guest room; that was the room he preferred, saying your room was too scary and probably haunted.

You carefully laid him down, taking his shoes off and covering his body with a blanket. How was he already in a deep sleep? You had no idea, but you envy him.

While he was asleep, you took the time to clean up the mess he made earlier, picking up all the toys he brought and putting Lando’s helmets back where they belonged. You loved your nephew, you really did, but man, it was really challenging to take care of a child. Not only were they messy and unpredictable, but they had so much energy you could barely keep up. You often wondered how your sister did it.

Once you finished up, you dramatically collapsed on the couch. “I need to sleep for like a week,” you joked, your boyfriend laughing at your antics.

He made his way to the couch, sitting next to you as he pulled you in a warm embrace, hands caressing your sides as he placed a sweet kiss on the top of your head. “Me too, and I was only here for like half an hour.”

“Imagine! I’ve been with him since this morning. I’m never babysitting again.”

“No? But you love Charlie.” He looked at you expectantly, trying to decipher if you were being serious.

“I do, but it’s too much sometimes. I honestly don’t know what we’ll do when we have our kids.”

Our kids. Two simple words that opened up a can that you would never be able to close. He stayed silent, mentally cursing the tent forming in his pants for betraying him in such an innocent moment.

You didn’t think anything of it, nor did you realise what those two words did to him, so you just reached for the remote control and browsed the channels. You ended up picking a cooking show, paying attention as if you would ever cook anything like that.

The entire time, Lando was paying attention to you — all of you. He admired your face, your hands, your hips… your tummy. He couldn’t stop himself from placing both his hands on your stomach, imagining what you would look like carrying a child. His child. He was well aware he was getting ahead of himself, but after witnessing today’s events? God, he needed to do something about it.

Another hour went by, and you were already catching up to your boyfriend’s intentions. To you, everything seemed normal at first, but the lower his hands got and the way his thumb was rubbing soft circles on your stomach, it clicked. You knew how Lando felt about having a family with you, but it never crossed your mind that seeing you with kids affected him so much. Though it all made more sense now, any time you were near a kid, even if you didn’t interact with them at all, his hands would be all over you, and when he got you alone? That’s another story, but you never connected the dots until now.

Suddenly, a phone call made both of you jump. It was your sister calling you to let you know she was in the building, ready to pick Charlie up. You gathered all his things as Lando greeted your sister, walking her in and guiding her to the guest room.

“Aw, he looks so peaceful.”

“Well, you should’ve seen him two hours ago,” you joked.

“I know,” she laughed with you. “Thank you for taking care of him on such short notice, you saved my life today.”

“It’s okay, I love spending time with Charlie, and I’m happy to do it any other time.”

“Thanks, Y/N. He honestly loves you, you have no idea how happy he got when I told him we were coming here.” Your sister was about to carry Charlie in his arms, but Lando offered to bring him down to the car.

Okay, now you got it. You had to admit that seeing Lando carry a little kid did things to you, and since your realisation a few minutes ago, you couldn’t stop thinking about a family; how did you suddenly get your own case of baby fever? Sure, you were still young, and that probably wouldn’t happen for at least a few years, but fantasising couldn’t hurt anyone.

You walked back to the apartment holding Lando’s hand, his grip so tight you thought he could break your hand if he squeezed a little harder. As soon as the door closed behind you, he grabbed you by the hips and turned you around, his lips crashing into yours in an intense kiss.

Kissing him back, your arms wrapped around his neck as one hand played with his hair.

“You looked so pretty today, taking such good care of the baby,” he mumbled against your lips, biting it sofly. You couldn’t contain the moan that left your mouth, only encouraging him further.

He carried you to your bedroom, immediately throwing you in the bed and hovering over you. He pressed himself further into you, making you very aware of his hardening cock as he nudged his bulge into your lower stomach. You moaned again, your legs going around his torso to pull him down.

“I wanna put a baby in you. God, you would look so perfect.” He didn’t know what to do with you. He wanted to kiss you, bite you; he wanted to touch you everywhere, his own mind making him feel overwhelmed.

After quickly taking off your shirt, he started kissing you everywhere, a trail of wet kisses making their way down your body. His touch was electric, making you nearly squirm beneath him as your fingers kept a tight grip on his hair, and his words only made the feeling intensify.

“Lando,” you moaned, he hummed in response, “do it,” you simply said. God, the way everything inside him shifted is something he wanted to remember for the rest of his life. He looked up at you, eyes filled with a hunger and desperation you had never seen before.

“Yeah? You want me to put a baby here?” He asked you, his big hand falling on your lower stomach as he kissed it.

“Mhm, yes.” Your heartbeat was as strong as ever, and you were already having a hard time focusing. You needed him to do something and you needed it now.

“Fuck,” he breathed as his hips involuntarily thrusted into the mattress. His lips kept exploring the lower part of your body as his hands worked on getting rid of your joggers, hands falling on your thighs immediately after to move them to rest on his shoulders.

“Please, I need you so bad,” you begged, and he assumed you were asking him to pay attention to your poor pussy, which you were, but his mouth is not what you needed right now, so you stopped him after one firm lick. “Inside me.”

“As you wish, my love.”

He got off the bed to quickly discard his clothes as you did the same with your bra, falling back on the bed as you eagerly waited for him. You felt like his gaze was piercing you as he lowered his body, pressing himself against you.

You moaned in anticipation, your arms wrapped around his neck as you felt your pussy starting to drip with desire. He moved his fingers along your sides and all the way down to your hole, collecting your wetness and spreading everywhere, finally getting to your clit as he rubbed soft circles for a moment.

He moved his mouth to your chest, taking one of your nipples into your mouth as he whimpered, and his mind instantly went to how sensitive and full they would be once you were pregnant, and he couldn’t wait any longer. “You look so fucking sexy tonight, sweetheart... I wanna fuck you so bad.” He was practically drooling as his fingers left your pussy and grabbed his cock, pumping it a couple of times before guiding it to your entrance.

You couldn’t help your gaze dropping to his member, already swollen at the tip and bubbling with precum. It seemed impossible, but you were sure you had never needed him this bad.

He pushed into you, making both of you moan loudly as his eyes met yours for a moment before pressing a kiss on your lips, whispering a little “I love you.”

He didn’t give you that long to adjust. His hands went under your ass, moving you up and down his cock. As if your sex life wasn’t already rough, the intention he had in mind just made him go crazier, because the way he was thrusting into you was bound to leave you sore for days.

The room was filled with whimpers and slick noises the whole time, moans of each other’s names joining from time to time. “Gonna fill you up so good,” he breathed, his hands squeezing your ass, “fuck, can’t wait to see your tummy grow.” All you could do was moan, the words leaving his mouth putting you under a spell that you could never escape. “Do you want that, love?”

“Uh- huh,” you managed to spit out, fingers drigging into his strong biceps.

“Wanna hear you say it.”

“Fuck- ah. I want you to put a baby in me.” You replied, eyes focusing on what your words did to him.

His hips began to speed up, thrashing your head against the pillows as he repeatedly hit that sweet spot deep inside you. He was so deep you could practically feel him in the pit of your stomach.

“Harder,” you whimpered, and he immediately started to drill into you, the air nearly getting knocked out of your lungs as his grip tightened.

“You feel so good around me, so so good for me,” he pants, looking down to where you were connected. “Fuck.”

“Ah- Lando.” It felt so good. So good that you are too far out of reality to form any thoughts; you could only think about him and how good he looked above you, with his mouth hung open in pure pleasure as he panted.

One of his hands made its way to your tummy, pressing down where he could feel himself. It was so simple yet so effective; he could feel his cock moving deep inside you. He gragged it further, his fingers catching your clit.

“Fuck,” you let out a broken moan, “just like that.”

He smirked at this; it was like you were begging him to get you pregnant as you began to tighten around him. He knew you were close; he could not only feel it but see it, the way your eyes were squeezed shut as your legs started to quiver.

“You wanna cum? You wanna cum while I fill you up?”

“Fuck,” you screamed as your head frantically nodded.

“Cum with me, I’m gonna put a baby in there.”

With that, your orgasm began to take over, squeezing around him tighter, triggering his own release. He slowed his movements down and both his hands took a hold of your waist, keeping you in place so you wouldn’t waste a single drop.

Both your moans were even louder as he did his best to continue pushing into you through his orgasm, wanting to pump as much of his seed into you as he possibly could. When he physically couldn’t keep going, he stopped, keeping his cock deep inside you as he tried to catch his breath.

He looked down at you, a smile adorning his face as he looked down at the mess he made. Slowly, he pulled out, his fingers quickly replacing his cock as he pushed his cum back into you, making you squirm and whimper at how sensitive you were.

“Gonna have to squeeze for me, love, you gotta keep it inside.” The sight almost made him want to fuck you again; he couldn’t believe how pretty you looked filled up to the brim with his cum.

His eyes locked with yours, fingers going inside his mouth as he licked them clean. He had lost his mind; you were sure of that, but fuck, you couldn’t deny how hot that was.

With a satisfied smirk, he fell next to you, pulling you into his arms as he kissed you once more. “I love you so much,” he whispered.

“I love you too.”

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