#life got... lifey! so sorry babes

[joojeans]

i know i have been gone forEVER (it will probably happen again i am who i am) but i come with the apology of fuma's i dare you installment muah muah muah ily all

[emiefaunwrites]

Ooo, if you’re still doing these, could you please write for 13?

Hgnnnnnn sorry this is so late! Life got lifey and I couldn’t actually think of something that would be suitable angsty! But I finally got around to it! I hope it’s okay and not too much (it could well be so I might take down later and re-write something else if I’m told it’s too much by too many people...)

The topic of this one shot is upsetting so I would suggest checking out the trigger warnings below before deciding if you want to read or not. If it isn’t obvious, I got heavy inspiration from ‘If anything happens I love you’ on Netflix (again, something to only watch after considering the below trigger warning as it is about the same topic).

So with that, heavy triggers warnings for school shooting and death below the break. 

Stay safe and much love x

13. We’ll see each other again – I promise - Ishileon

“Will you let the teacher know I’ll be a few minutes late?”

Leon nods, ruffling the hair on his boyfriend’s head lovingly. Kiyotaka’s night terrors had struck again last night. The poor boy had woken up screaming, too lost in the fear to realise that Leon was there with him. It had taken Leon nearly ten minutes to ground him and thirty more to stop the tears.  

They only got five hours sleep. They both tried to drop back off but they both know it will never happen. Kiyotaka’s always too frightened in case he falls back into the nightmare, which unfortunately has happened far too many times. And in return, Leon can feel the tension in his boyfriend’s muscles and can’t relax himself.

Leon can manage on a couple of hours sleep. He knows it’s not healthy, not really, but every now and again he needs to pull an all-nighter just to finish an assignment. Kiyotaka, on the hand, has a strict sleeping routine. In bed by nine, read for one more hour and then lights out. This way he will always get a solid eight hours sleep before he needs to wake up at six o’clock every morning.

Leon tried to convince him to have a sick day; recuperate just for once so that he can be back to full strength tomorrow. But Kiyotaka is a stubborn bastard. He’s never taken a sick day in his life and doesn’t plan to start now. The states in which he’s dragged himself to class is ridiculous but it’s just because he’s passionate. He has goals he needs to achieve and nothing, absolutely nothing, will get in his way.

“You sure you’re gonna…”

“Leon, I’m fine.”

Well. No one can say Leon didn’t try. It’s a small victory that he’s convinced the boy to take his time rather than force himself to be there on time. He smiles at the pout on his boyfriend’s lips before bending down to brush his own against them. He feels Kiyotaka relax slightly, humming into the kiss briefly before pushing him away.

“Now go, or else we’ll both be late.”

“Yes, boss.”

Kiyotaka snorts, not able to stop the smirk that blossoms. As he rises from the edge of the bed, he gently skims his thumb across Leon’s cheek before resting his palm gently against his collar bone. His thoughts burn bright in his eyes as they always do. Leon knows exactly what he’s going to say so decides to say it first.

“Love you, babe.”

A small chuckle. A loving smile. And a chaste kiss with a response whispered against Leon’s lips.

“I love you too.”

The walk to class without Kiyotaka is odd. His palm feels surprisingly empty. They’ve gotten into a routine in the last few months, especially after Leon slept through an entire lesson. To his credit, he had been doing something productive the night before. It just took longer than he expected and so he ended up forgetting to set his alarm.

Nonetheless, he passes his boyfriend’s message to the teacher and takes his seat. It soon becomes apparent that Kiyotaka will be the last one to class as even Mondo wanders in. At the empty desk in front of him, he throws Leon a confused look.

“Nightmare.”

Mondo simply hums, confusion giving way to pity. The biker was actually the first to find out about Kiyotaka’s night terrors. The two had become good friends in first year, long before Leon fell hopelessly in love. After a study session had gone on longer than either boy expected, they fell asleep. And that was unfortunately the same night that Kiyotaka suffered with a particularly terrifying dream.

“He alright?”

“Yeah. Just needs a bit longer to get ready.”

The biker nods, turning at the sound of the teacher’s voice as class begins. Leon knows he should be listening but is more concerned with watching the door. He knows that Kiyotaka will come barging in, apologising in his booming voice with a look of shame in his eyes even though he’s given a fair warning. Kiyotaka is a worried and Leon wants to make sure that his boyfriend catches his eye, sees his smile and can use it to calm himself down.

After all, he needs as little stress today as…

A sound cuts through this thoughts. Short. Sharp. Distinct. The entire room goes silent, holding their breath just in case what they heard was really what they heard. And then it’s there again. And again. Followed by the sounds of screams.

The teacher moves fast amongst the chaos, locking the door and switching off the light. Everyone’s dropping to the floor, huddling against the wall and under tables as their teacher gives them instructions. Phones on silent, no one to say a word, no one to move. And most importantly, stay calm.

But Kiyotaka’s out there.

Leon tells the teacher, says he needs to go get him. But he’s pulled backwards, dragged to the floor and under a table. He tries to fight, tries to get away but Mondo is strong. His legs wrap around his waist, holding him firmly in place as his hand covers his mouth to silence him.

“He’ll be fine,” he whispers. “He’s smart. He’ll hide.”

Leon knows that. He does. But he’s out there, alone and afraid. Leon should be there with him. He should have stayed behind, insisted that he’d be late so they could go together. Or better yet, not insisted that he took a sick day and just let him come to class on time like he wanted to. Then at least he would be here and people would be looking out for him…

He fumbles in his pocket, pulling out his phone and opening a new message. If he can’t leave, he can at least make sure that Kiyotaka’s safe. His fingers move at lightning speed as he types his message and hits send.

Are you okay?

The wait for a reply is agonising. Time almost seems to stand still, dragging out a second as if it was a year. And then it appears on his screen.

Yes. Are you?

The relief rushes through him, air hot on his face as it puffs against Mondo’s palm. He’s okay he’s okay he’s okay. Once again, his fingers dance across the screen and his message is gone.

Yeah. Where are you?

He can hear quiet sobbing all around him, the tapping of fingers on screens as others write messages to their loved ones. He needs to let his family know what’s going on but he can’t bring himself to leave Kiyotaka’s message log. His hands shake as his fingers squeeze the phone, willing another message to come through.

Boy’s toilets.

He’s hidden he’s okay oh thank god he’s okay. He feels Mondo peek over his shoulder, feels his hand drop away from his mouth but it doesn’t matter. His fingers are moving to type another answer but more writing appears on the screen.

I’m scared.

A lump forms in Leon’s throat at that. Kiyotaka never admits he’s scared. Not even after the night terror will he say it. He always feels like too much of a burden and so would rather bottle it all up. Leon’s gotten better at reading the signs so that he doesn’t have to say them. But right now, he can’t do anything but read those two words on the screen and watch as more appear.

I wish you were here.

Me too, babe.

The sound rings through the air again, closer this time. Leon can feel the tears stream down his face, can feel Mondo’s hand tighten around his shoulder and only just manages to wonder how it got there. But there’s more words on his screen.

I want you to know that I love you with all my heart.

There’s a shattering in Leon’s chest as a sob catches in his throat. He’s going to be fine. They’re going to be fine. Nothing is going to happen. Nothing, nothing, nothing…

You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.

Nothing is going to happen. Nothing is going to happen. Nothing is going to happen…

I was going to wait until graduation for this, but just in case we never see each other again...

We’ll see each other again. I promise.

Leon hits send just as the gunshot rings out. It’s even closer, on this floor, just outside around the corner. He can barely see the screen, it’s so blurry, the words splotches of black that are meaningless. But he’ll know when Kiyotaka writes again. He’ll see the new message. He’ll see it and know that the gunshot meant nothing. That it was fine. That Kiyotaka is fine.

But the message never comes.

They’re saved an hour later. But not Kiyotaka. He was found alone in the bathroom, a mobile phone by his side. With one final message ready to send.

Will you marry me?