#let's not let these lil fucks conquer us

[savingsallow]

Reaching my heart out to all the wonderful people here—though we might face negativity, remember that you're not alone. I will always stand by your side and hold your hand.

Haters may try to bring us down, but together we can create a safe and loving space where we uplift each other. Let’s continue to stand strong and support one another.

Sending all my love and warm huggies to y'all! 🫂❤️‍🩹

[sorrowedpickle]

Breathless

Wednesday Addams x fem!reader

A/N: I was eating donuts making this

A lil short

Warning: smut, strap_on sex, p in v, overstim, bottom!wednesday, top!reader

Minors and men, DNI

Request: pickle, pickle, pickle. i neeeeeeeeed a fic of just fucking anyone of jenna’s characters. like just making them go dumb from r’s strap or something

Your eyes roaming over her arched back covered in dark hickeys and scratch marks, ass red and sensitive from you smacking it so much and so hard.

Her usual pale skin now different shades of colors scattered across her along her body that’s shakes and shivers with every touch you give her.

Her face buried deep into the pillow as she grips the sides bunching it up to cover her dark red ears as moans that were once silent escape her, trying to hide them as much as possible but she was too loud for it to work. It just sounded muffled or like it was through the walls.

As you looked over her, a small smirk rested on your face, relishing in the fact that you had turned this once well-kept and stoic woman into a mere sensitive mess. Her usual calm and collected demeanor had completely melted away under your touch, leaving nothing but her vulnerability.

You couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride deep inside, knowing that you had the power to affect her in such a way. You had conquered her defenses and broken down her walls, leaving her completely at your mercy. In this moment, you held onto her hips tightly, making sure she couldn’t get away from your grasp.

In your hands, she was a crumbling mess, her body writhing beneath yours as you thrusted into her. Oh, you could get used to this.

Your hands grip her already bruised hips, helping her push back against you as your relentless thrust continue into her.

She had said this was the only position she’d do when you requested to switch, just a little something more than you usually do to switch things up a bit. She claimed it was the least embarrassing position possible, with you not being able to see her face as you fucked her.

She seemed to ultimately regret this decision, she couldn’t control anything. Where your hands went, how fast or slow you thrusted into her, how many times you’d two do it.

No, you were in control it seemed and didn’t plan on stopping as your hips drilled into hers. Not only that, but the amount of times she came was embarrassing to admit in the time you’ve been going at it.

You, of course, couldn’t get enough. Watching her come undone — because for once you had the strap on on — only made you want to see it again which caused a cycle, a never ending cycle it seemed and Wednesday had to bare through it.

Her legs that gave out ages ago shook as you held her up, no longer being able to do anything but sit there and moan and whine into the pillow, trying her hardest to keep breathing and not let out choked moans.

One hand moves along her hip and up to her back, tracing the marks and soothingly trying to ease her a bit. Your touch soft and tender compared to your hips that slam against her as the straps to the strap-on dug into your skin, leaving rope burns in its wake but that was the last thing you were worried about with this girl in front of you.

Her once neatly kept hair now sprawled across her back in wavy curls, moving with her as she moves against the bed.

You pull her ass further up to get a better angle, forcing her face to bury deeper into the pillow as she lets out a long whine that’s quickly replaced by a quiet moan as you continue to pound into her.

If only you could actually feel her, how she’d throb around the cock after the continuous orgasms you gave her. Oh that must have felt like heaven if you could even keep up without growing weak yourself.

How could you not? With such a sight you could only imagine the way she felt wrapped around you.

Her legs start to shake more, her grip on the pillow tightening as her moans come out more frequent and your movements speed up, hold on her hips becoming firm to keep her in place while moved against her.

You watched her slowly turn her head to look back at you, a very rare sight to her. Her dark, lust filled eyes full of tears as she tried to hold back her moans, sensitive from the many orgasms you were giving her could have been the only cause of such a thing.

This only spurs you one, thrust becoming harder and her eyes widen. Her back arches further as a loud moan escapes her before she shoves her face back into the pillow, high pitches noises leaving her throat as you slam into her.

Her body continues to shake against you as you hold her hips up for her, leaning down to press a kiss to the back of her neck and soaking in the feeling of her shiver as thrust into her.

Eventually her body tenses, stuttering against you as you lean back up and she lets out a low moan into the pillow and her grip stays tight.

Her body had been thoroughly exhausted after the pleasure she had just experienced. Her limbs were barely capable of responding to any outside stimuli, and her breathing was shallow and laboured. Her face was hidden in the pillow as her chest rose up and down.

This doesn’t stop you though, your thrust only become faster as you desperately try to get her to do it one last time, pulling her hips back into you with force.

She cries out, hands gripping the pillow tighter. Still sensitive from her recent orgasm, more tears fall from her face eyes staring forward at the beds headboard unfocused.

You press your palm into her back to steady yourself and keep to motions going, watching the way she shakes and moans under you.

She had overstimulated you plenty of times, so you knew exactly how it worked and what to do. But to be the one actually doing and not receiving? You couldn’t decide which one you liked more.

Your hips continue to snap to hers in a repeated motion, keeping a steady pace as you fuck into her sensitive heat before she lets out another loud moan, this time it’s choked up and broken.

She’s had enough, you had decided as you slow your movements letting her breathing in heavily. Her grip on the pillow had turned her knuckles white and her fingers shook along with her sensitive body.

You smile, movements completely stopped as you sit behind her in between her legs with the fake cock still buried deep inside.

Letting her come down from her final high you gently rub her hips, running your hands up and down her back to help her calm down a bit before placing a kiss from the small of her back up to the back of her neck, gently moving her hair out of the way letting your fingers linger on the dark red and purple skin you had sucked and scratched.

While you do this, she says something incoherently under her breath. Her eyes still unfocused as she stared to the side not longer trying to stay up as she blinks slowly muttering and mumbling.

Leaning back a bit, you pull the dildo out not letting the small whine from her go unnoticed as you took the straps off and laid back against her, arms wrapping around her to trap them between her and bed as you nuzzle into her shoulder. Just feeling her breath against or simply be against you could calm you down in an instant and you hoped it’d work on her as well as you lazily place kisses on her shoulder.

“Still think this was a bad idea?” You ask, small smirk on your face and she mumbles something eye brows pinching together and her nose scrunching up before she relaxes again.

And before you know it, you feel her body completely relax and her breathing even out. She hasn’t even given you a chance to do anything like gloat or ask if she was okay. She was knocked out and would probably not wake up for a while.

You snort, sitting up to just admire the sight. Her face relaxed as marks liter across her bare body, mouth slightly agape and her breathing finally normal again.

A soft smile plays onto your lips, pulling the blanket over the two of you and you lay next to her. Body firmly pressed against hers as you wrap your arms around and rest your head on her shoulder and close your eyes. A soft sigh leaving you as you breath in her scent and feel her warm skin.

—

Tagslist: @bluetreecloud20 @skate-to-breathee @wol-fica @raven-ss @restlessdot @dumb-fvck104 @tabberthecat @crazyoffher @rhythm-catsandwine @makncheese12 @alexkolax @jennasfav @melthedwarf @t-wylia @unknownuserzdjdh @pnsteblnme

A/N: not my best, probably gonna edit it a bit later on

[tired-biscuit]

Brothers best friend!Kiba who just can’t keep his hands off of you. Your brother leaves for the bathroom? His hands are up your shirt, and his tongue in your mouth. Your brother is making a quick snack run for their gaming night? That’s enough time for him to fuck you in the next room. It’s 3am, your brother finally passed out? Guess who is under your blanket already trying to get a taste of you.

18+ MDNI, fem!reader // cw: brother’s best friend trope, fingering, size difference

you feel a hand sneaking underneath your shirt the second your brother ventures into the kitchen to grab himself something to eat and leaves you alone in the room with his best friend.

the touch itself is warm and hasty. rough fingerpads and a calloused palm travel across your stomach, briefly squeezing your hip before gliding upwards to the sensitive spot that’s right underneath your ribs. you arch into it on instinct; opening up and allowing it to go further, all the way up to your tits.

a kiss gets pressed onto the side of your neck. the slight nip caused by sharp canines makes the skin there tingle slightly. “hey.”

you exhale an adrenaline-fueled breath. “hi.”

“scooch over.”

“okay.”

you twist your body to the side, resting your back onto the arm of the couch, propping both feet on the cushions and allowing the man beside you to settle between your legs.

the smile that appears on kiba’s lips now is faint, but it’s equally as infuriating when he leans into your space and looms above you like some sort of menacing tower that you’re not at all afraid to conquer.

his forehead rests against your own. “you gonna let me touch ya a little?”

you give him a small nod that’s a mixture between eager and hesitant. “mhmm, yeah.”

he wastes no time kissing you. his lips press against yours greedily, tongue already gliding and pushing past your teeth as soon as you take that first shaky breath to try and steady yourself. you feel him explore the inside of your mouth with familiar urgency as he hunches his shoulders and brings your bodies even closer.

he tastes like the vanilla coke he just finished drinking earlier. it’s kind of dizzying.

and as if that wasn’t enough already, it doesn’t take long for the hand that he’s got under your shirt to slide down to the waistband of your shorts.

you tense up when he slips it under. turn rigid when a single finger starts to slowly circle your clit, moving dangerously closer with every swipe.

“relax,” he mutters. “you’ve gone all stiff on me.”

“you said a little,” you whisper, panting already. when he finally finds the spot and adds pressure to the bundle of nerves in answer, you can’t help but curl your toes.

“this is a little,” he says, quietly snickering against your cheek when you glare up at him. “what?”

“we should stop before we get caught,” you grit through clenched teeth, even though you wish to do just about anything but stop.

“oh c’mon, don’t be such a pussy,” he huffs, dragging his touch up and down your sticky slit. you’re easily wet from the risk and the thrill it brings, and it causes his fingers to outright glide. he thinks it’s hot as hell but he doesn’t say it because he knows you’ll attempt to punch him for it.

“i’m not,” you quip back immediately, trying not to stare at the playful gleam that’s appeared in his chocolate brown eyes now. “i’m just… nngh… i’m trying to keep us out of trouble.”

“well, i’m trying to get ya to cum on my fingers before your bro comes back from the kitchen,” he murmurs, barely containing the smirk of satisfaction when he sees you wiggling your hips in futile attempt to gain more friction. even your own body is working against you. “and besides, we’re in a fuckload of trouble either way… so shut up and lemme play with your pussy a lil’ while i still can.”

a soft moan slips out when he suddenly pushes two fingers inside you and curls them upwards without warning, stretching you out in a way that causes your knees to try and squeeze together despite him being there in the middle. your thighs tremble with desperation. god, that feels good after almost two weeks of nothing, even if you’re tighter than usual because of the nerves.

in an instant, he’s using his other hand to clamp it over your mouth… or most of your face, that is. the size of it alone is enough for your stomach to fill with countless fluttering butterflies.

“i mean it,” he hisses and his gaze is hard instead of playful now. his entire expression looks painfully tight as he stares at the hearts that have formed in your eyes. “shut the fuck up unless you wanna get us killed.”

oh, he cares. he cares about his friendship with your brother; the loyalty he’s supposed to be offering to his best friend. you’re meant to be prohibited territory, the girl he’s not supposed to be messing around with under no circumstances, and yet here he is: knuckle deep in your cunt and slamming you every chance he gets for several months now.

all it took was one very late movie night and an empty house. your brother had passed out on the couch, blissfully unaware of the shitshow that’s to come, and you’d sneaked away into the kitchen together to make yourselves some food, but had ended up fucking there instead.

bent over the counter in the dark, aside from the little light above the stove you’d flicked on earlier. experiencing his iron-like grip on your hips as he pounded away, trying not to drool from how much the size difference between you was fucking you up. feeling his fat cock splitting you open each time he’d bullied it straight into your pussy, making you wince because of the fullness residing there.

he’d felt so big behind you; so big inside you. and holy fuck, the risk… the freaking risk! it fueled your body with indescribable excitement and had made every last hair on the back of your neck stand to attention. it’s the reason why you’d decided to stay in the kitchen even as you were frantically tugging on the waistband of his sweatpants and he was pulling your panties to the side.

after all, it’d be tough to explain how he’d ended up in your room if your sibling were to wake up.

but as it happens, he didn’t. your brother had kept on sleeping, and kiba had kept on screwing you and fulfilling his longtime fantasy until he’d emptied his balls inside you and had left you dripping warm cum all over your thighs and even some of the kitchen tiles.

“your pussy feels even better than i imagined... goddammit, i’ve wanted you so bad for so long… so fuckin’ bad.”

you like him and he likes you — it’s been like that since high school, perhaps even before that. so you understand the harsh look that he gives you now as he continues to fuck you with his fingers in your dimly-lit living room and tells you to stay quiet.

he doesn’t want to lose you. doesn’t want to lose his best friend either.

it’s tough playing the loyal dog role.

but someone’s gotta do it.

[rollingsins]

Quinn Bailey Must Die, p2

P1 | P2 | P3

summary: Quinn Bailey continues her quest to conquer the Carpenter sisters. Well, one of them, at least. all hers universe.

warnings: (+18), Tara is (was) Ghostface, language. Implied sexual content.

pairing: tara carpenter x reader, sam carpenter x quinn bailey

word count: 6.1k

a/n: set in the all hers universe, sequel to the first. wanted to try something a lil different - this is mostly from Sam's POV. There will be at least one other part after this one. Enjoy and let me know your thoughts!

Sam’s bed is shaking when she wakes. 

She has a fan plugged into the wall. Military grade earplugs. A white noise machine. 

And yet, every morning, she wakes to the sound of a squeaking mattress and you moaning like you’re on a casting couch for a bad 60s porno. 

Aggravated, she sits up. Launches a pillow at the wall in the hope it will quell your happy groans. 

It doesn’t. 

“Tara, YN!” She yells, more than fed up, “Shut up! Shut the fuck up.”

You hear Tara groan through the walls. A quiet shush. The bed stops shaking. Sam slumps back into her pillows, content. 

Tara has never cared, but at least you can be shamed into silence. 

She closes her eyes, snuggles back into her pillows for a couple more hours of precious sleep. 

A few minutes go by, and just as Sam is on the cusp of unconsciousness, she hears you let out another, loud moan. 

“Oh, Tara-” 

Sam sits up. 

Fuck this, she thinks as she grouchily shimmies back into an old hoodie, I’ll sleep outside. 

-

When Sam returns to the kitchen - after seventy minutes of tossing and turning with a pillow and a blanket in the apartment hallway - Tara has the audacity to look pleased with herself. 

She’s wearing one of your old t-shirts, absent-mindedly stroking your hair as she sips on a cup of coffee. As if her bedroom activities hadn’t driven Sam out of hers. 

Sam is fuming. Her cheeks are red as she slams her bedding onto the couch. 

You turn at the same time Tara does. 

“What’s up, Sam?” Asks Tara, like she doesn’t know the answer, “You look like you’ve just been dragged through a bush backwards.” 

“You know what’s up,” Sam growls. She snatches a mug from the kitchen counter and pours herself a healthy helping of coffee, “How many times do I have to tell you-“ 

“Relax, Sam,” Tara says with a roll of her eyes, “We didn’t realize you were awake. We’re sorry-“

“I wasn’t awake until you woke me,” Sam says, jabbing a finger towards her nonplussed sister, “This is ridiculous. It’s the third time this week. If you two can’t respect my boundaries-” 

Your face is a little hot. You shoot an apologetic look towards Sam, “We’re sorry, Sam,” You say, “We get… carried away sometimes.” 

But Tara looks annoyed. 

“This is our home,” Says Tara, “If we want to fuck, we will. You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to-”

Sam slams her hand to the counter, making you jump. 

“You asked me to come here,” She growls. She looks a little wild; red cheek, hair messy and ruffled, dark, tired eyes, “You asked me to pitch in. If you want me to go, I’m taking my share of the rent with me.” 

Tara crosses her arms, unhappily. 

“I’m doing the two of you a favor by being here. You think I can afford to pay New York City rent and California rent? The least you can do is not have loud sex at six AM-” Continues Sam, voice strained. 

“You’re right, we’re sorry, Sam,” You interject, eyebrows pinched, “Right, babe? We’ll be quieter.” 

Tara’s quiet for a moment, but Sam knows her sister. She knows the things Tara’s thinking in her head, and none of them are favorable. 

“I have a life back in California,” Sam warns, “If you want me to go, I’ll go. But I’m taking my money with me.” 

Tara’s brows knit. 

“We don’t want that,” You say, quickly, “We’re very grateful you decided to help us out. Right, Tara?”

“Very grateful,” Tara says, voice tight, “Sorry, Sam.” 

She pauses a moment. 

“Babe, you’ve got the ad up, right?” 

Sam ignores the spark of annoyance that floods through her and grabs her lunch.

She sighs right before she heads out. Decides she doesn't want to start her day swimming in negativity. 

“Bye, YN. Love you, Tara.” 

“Bye Sam,” You say, with a small smile, “Have a good day.”

Sam waits a moment.

“Bye, Tara.” She says, once more. 

Tara rolls her eyes, “Bye Sam. What, you need me to walk you out or something?” 

Sam just sighs and leaves. 

-

Sam has a new job at NYU. 

A job she loves. 

Her life so far? Deadbeat father, emotionally absent mother. A murderous psychopath as a biological father. A murderous psychopath as an ex-boyfriend. 

It hasn’t panned out the way she was hoping. 

Nowadays, there’s only two bright sparks in her life. 

Her baby sister, and her job. 

What more could a girl need? 

She’s working in the history department, a subject she’s always been good at. Tutoring students who apparently don’t share her prowess for the past. 

Her first assignment is a nineteen year old boy with straight D grades. Her second is a girl who point blank asks if “the Nazis won the Korean War?” 

Her third strolls into the library now. 

Doesn’t bother to introduce herself. She walks in like she owns the place. Settles herself next to Sam with a coy look in her eye and flutter of her eyelashes. 

“Hi,” Says the girl, with a coy smile. A smile that is far too friendly for discussing the Yom Kippur war. 

Sam blinks.

“Hi,” She says, a little taken aback. She gets ahold of herself, “I’m Sam. I’ll be your tutor for the next semester.” 

This girl has long, flowing strawberry-blonde hair. Piercing blue eyes. She’s wearing a shirt that rides up over her belly button and a pair of pants that are so tight they look as if they were painted on. 

The girl watches for a moment. Surveys Sam - like a hungry wolf might appraise a rabbit. 

And then she grins. 

“We actually know each other,” Says the girl, “At least - we know of each other.”

Sam tilts her head. 

“Oh?” 

“I know your sister,” Says the girl, and her smile turns sheepish, “I used to live with her. Before she kicked me out.” 

Sam blinks. 

“You’re Quinn Bailey,” Sam realizes with a start. 

Quinn’s cheeks pinch in a tight smile. 

“Guilty,” She says with a nervous laugh, “Sorry. This is awkward. I didn’t know the school was going to pair me with you. I mean - I didn’t even know you worked here.” 

Sam leans back a little, suddenly on guard. 

“It’s fine,” She says, “I’ll ask you to be assigned to another tutor.” 

Quinn squints. 

“Actually, you can’t,” Says Quinn, sounding apologetic, “There’s only two history tutors - I checked. The other guy’s out for the next two weeks.” She leans in close, eyebrows in her hairline, “Mono.” 

She pauses. 

“Sorry, this must be awkward for you. But I really do need help. My first paper is due next Thursday.” 

Sam sighs.

“Look, Quinn,” She says, “I just don’t think it’s a good idea after you-“ 

“Threw myself at your sister?” Quinn finishes. Her face is tight - she looks a little embarrassed, “I get it. I do. But you’re the only one who can help me.” 

Sam tilts her head.

Quinn reaches over, takes Sam’s hand. 

“Please.” 

Clearly, it’s been too long since Sam felt the warmth of human touch. Because Quinn’s hand on hers ignites a spark that sends shockwaves through her body. 

You need a boyfriend, she thinks momentarily, badly. 

Sam retracts her hand, squinting slightly. 

And remembers the horror stories Tara had bellowed down the phone line. 

“Those girls are very special to me,” She says, “What you tried to do? It’s despicable.” 

Quinn looks dismayed as Sam stands. 

“Sorry,” Sam says as she straps her back over her shoulder, “You’ll have to find someone else.” 

-

Tara’s in a mood when Sam gets home that night. 

She orders takeout, instead of eating Sam’s meticulously planned, healthy vegan curry. She ignores Sam’s attempts at conversation, and turns the TV a little louder when Sam tries to offer her dessert. 

Sam gives up, not long after. 

She eats dinner by herself, trying not to let her mind drift to Quinn. 

“Please,” She’d murmured, “I really need your help.” 

Weird, she thinks. Quinn’s touch had imprinted on her mind all night. For such a devilish, evil, homewrecker - she’d seemed kind of sweet. Hopeless, almost. 

Like a lost little child, adorned in red lipstick and Michael Kors. 

But then she remembers her sister. 

You arrive home, not long after Sam’s finishing her plate, batting Quinn’s easy smile out of her brain. 

You press a kiss to Tara’s forehead, offer Sam a small smile. 

And then you throw your bag down to the floor and disappear into your bedroom. 

“Good day, Sam?” You ask when you emerge, towel over your shoulders. 

Sam hums. 

“Weird day,” She admits. She shakes her head as she catches your questioning stare, “Nevermind.” 

You watch her a moment, and then reach down to squeeze Tara’s shoulders. 

“I’m taking a shower. Pick a movie for us?” You say with a quick kiss to her cheek. 

“Sure, babe,” Tara says. 

And then she sits up long enough to shoot a glare over at Sam. 

“Just be careful not to shower too loudly,” Tara says, “We wouldn’t want to interrupt Sam’s precious relaxation time. Who knows? She might threaten to not pay the water bill next time.” 

Irritation flashes through Sam, hot and fast.  

She’d been up at six AM again. Her sister is the culprit. And somehow she’s the bad guy? 

“Stop being a brat, Tara,” Sam says, voice tight, “You’ll be twenty next year, you better start acting like it.” 

“And is that when I’ll be as demanding and bitchy and sexless as you?” Tara deadpans. 

Sam lets her cutlery clatter over her plate. Rage simmers in the pit of her stomach that begs to be unleashed. Primarily on her ungrateful shit-head of a sister. 

I move across the country to bail you out, she wants to scream, and you can’t even be hospitable? 

But you get there first. 

“Stop it.” You say, pulling the remote from her hand, and tugging her up, “You are being a brat. Apologize to Sam and go to bed.” 

Tara glares up at you. 

“But babe-“ 

“Now,” You warn, “Or it’ll be your turn to sleep in the hall.” 

Tara’s face clouds over. 

It’s a familiar look to Sam. 

It’s the one she used to give to their Father. Right after she’d choked Sam, or punched her, or pulled her hair.

Her fake apology face.

“Sorry Sam,” She mumbles, as she stands, looking anything but, “Try earplugs next time, maybe.”

“Bed.” You say, “Now.” 

Tara storms off to bed, shooting a withering glare over to Sam as she leaves. 

Sam’s lips twitch. 

She’s used to this - Tara taking her anger out on her. She’s done their whole lives. 

It doesn’t mean it hurts any less. 

You sigh, throwing your towel over one of the dining chairs. 

“Sorry,” You say, “You know what she’s like sometimes.” 

“That therapy is really working wonders, huh?” Asks Sam, a little sarcastic. Her hands are shaking, a little. 

You bite your lip, sinking into the seat opposite her.

“Good days and bad days,” You say, “Dr Colmann says miracles aren’t going to happen overnight.” 

“That girl needs a miracle.” Sam says, a little frosty. Then, she softens, “Sorry. I didn’t mean that. I’m not trying to put you in the middle.” 

“It’s fine, Sam,” You say, “I know she can be a handful. We’re talking about all the stuff she used to do as a kid in therapy.” 

Sam snorts. 

“You mean like when she cut off all the heads of my teddy bears because I wouldn’t let her blow out the candles on my birthday cake?” 

You blink, a little taken aback. 

“No,” You say, slowly, “She kept that one quiet.”

“You better not be talking about me.” Tara’s voice sounds down the hall, hot and angry. 

You look from Sam long enough to shoot a glare down the hall, “And you better be in bed. I mean it, Tara. I’ll be there in five.” 

Tara huffs, but retreats, nonetheless.

You look back over to Sam, who has a contemplative look on her face. 

“I met Quinn Bailey today,” She says. 

You stare. 

“Why?” Is what you ask, and then you frown, “She’s not trying to worm her way back in here, is she? Because that’s not happening.” 

“The only thing she’s trying to worm her way into is an A+ on her history paper,” Sam says, “I told her to forget it.” 

You’re quiet a moment, and then you nod. 

“Thanks Sam,” You say, “Can you do that? Send her away? Isn’t it your job?” 

Sam shrugs. 

“I don’t know,” She admits, honestly, “I guess I’ll find out tomorrow.” 

-

“You can’t turn her away Sam, it’s your job.” Says Sam’s supervisor, sternly, in the morning, “The poor girl was in here in tears last night. There’s no one else.” 

Sam pauses. 

“It’s just-“ She tries, “She has a complicated relationship with my sister and her girlfriend. They used to be roommates. She made some unwanted advances and they kicked her out. I can’t tutor her. It’s a conflict of interest.”

Her supervisor smiles, a little passive aggressive. 

“Spend less time worrying about conflicts of interest Sam,” He tells her, “And more time teaching them”. 

He punctuates his point by tapping down on a book about Palestine. 

And Sam sighs. 

-

“I could just quit,” Sam says later, over a sad looking salad in the cafeteria with Mindy, “I mean, I only took this job because Tara asked me to help out with rent for a bit.” 

Mindy looks over, eyebrows raised.

“Doesn’t quitting your job defeat the purpose of helping Tara with rent?” She asks.

Sam bites her lip. 

“I suppose…” She admits, “Though it wouldn’t be too hard to get a new one. It’s not like the pay is that great, anyway.” 

“I thought you loved your new job,” Says Mindy, “You were saying only last week how good it feels to finally have something fulfilling in your life.” 

“It’s just a job, at the end of the day, Mindy,” Says Sam. She ponders this over a mouthful of lettuce, “Besides, Tara is my sister. She comes first.” 

Mindy purses her lips. 

“And you think she would do the same for you?” Asks Mindy, after a moment, “Quit her job for you? Fly across the country and move into your apartment to bail her out?” 

Sam straightens her shoulders. 

“I’d like to think so,” She says, somewhat defensively.

Even if she doesn’t believe it. 

Mindy shakes her head with a sigh. 

“She won’t even stop banging her girl at six AM for you,” Mindy says, “She won’t even let you get a decent night’s sleep.”

“They’ve said they’ll be quieter.” Sam says, softly. 

Mindy shoots her a look. 

“And how many times have they told you that?” She asks. 

Sam averts her gaze. 

Too many times to count. 

“Don’t do her any favors, Sam.” 

Sam stares. 

“And I thought she was supposed to be your friend?” Sam asks, somewhat pointedly. 

“She is,” Says Mindy, “She’s my friend. And I love her. But she’s selfish as fuck, Sam. You know that. You’re related to that. You’re already being a good big sister. But you don’t have to give up everything for her, Sam. Do something for yourself for once.” 

“And Quinn Bailey is me doing something for myself?” Sam asks, eyebrows raised. 

“If she lets you keep the job you love, sure.” Says Mindy, “Tara will get over it. Besides, you’re only tutoring the girl. What’s the worst that can happen?” 

Sam chews her lip. 

And considers it. 

-

“I’ll help you,” She tells Quinn, a little later over the phone, “Despite my better judgment, I’ll help you.” 

Quinn lets out a breathy sigh, “Oh, Sam - thank you so much-“ 

“I’m not doing it for you,” Sam says, voice stern, “And we’re not friends. I don’t want you coming to the apartment and upsetting my sister and her girlfriend. We’ll meet at the library, every evening around eight. Okay?” 

“Okay,” Quinn agrees, before she hesitates, “It’s not about Tara, Sam, I really just need the help.” 

Sam hums. 

“See you tonight.” 

-

“You’re meeting who at the library?” Tara explodes over the dinner table. 

Sam sighs. Helps herself to more potatoes. 

“I don’t have a choice, Tara,” She says, “It’s my job.” 

But Tara’s eyes are wide as if Sam has betrayed her. 

This is how Tara works. Black and white, no shades of gray. 

Mindy’s words echo through Sam’s head.

Don’t do her any favors, Sam. 

You touch Tara’s arm. 

“It’s alright, Sam, we know,” You say, voice gentle. 

“Are you doing this to punish me?” Tara asks, eyebrows knit, “You don’t like us fucking loudly and so for revenge you’re going to tutor the girl who tried to destroy our relationship?” 

“I need the money, Tara,” Sam says, voice tired, “If I lose this job I won’t be able to chip in for rent.” 

“So get a new job,” Tara says, immediately, as if it’s a perfectly reasonable request. 

“I like my job.” Says Sam, “I’m not getting a new one.” 

Tara splutters. She looks over to you, wide-eyed, “And you’re okay with this?” She asks, in disbelief. 

“Tara,” You say, knitting your brows, “It’s not our decision-” 

“Like hell, it’s not,” Says Tara, “You’re my sister. You’re supposed to be on my side.” 

“There are no sides, Tara.” Sam says, “This isn’t world war three - as much as you’d like it to be. I’m helping her out because I’ll get fired if I don’t. I’ve already told her she’s not coming to the apartment. You won’t have to see her. If she tries anything, I’ll shut it down. Alright?”

You touch Tara’s back. 

“It’s fine, Sam,” You say, quietly, “Baby, it’s okay. We’re not seeing her again.” 

“Yeah, right.” Tara scoffs, “Please. This is just another one of her ploys.” 

She looks over at Sam. 

“She tried to steal me, Sam, we told you that, right?” She says, sounding scandalized. 

Sam rolls her eyes. 

“Yes, you told me that,” Says Sam, “And it didn’t count for shit because you’re a loyal girlfriend and your head couldn’t be turned. Right?” 

Tara thinks. She blinks as if her brain is short-circuiting. 

“Right.” She says, voice slow. 

“Perfect,” Sam says, voice dry, as she stands, “Look, Tara, please don’t be mad at me. You know I wouldn’t see her if I had the choice.” 

Tara folds her arms. 

Sam sighs. 

She leans down to press a kiss to the top of Tara’s head. 

But Tara jerks away. 

“Go, Sam, you’re going to do what you want anyway." She says, sounding surly. 

Sam slips her bag over her shoulder. 

“Bye, girls.” She says, a little dejected, “Love you.” 

But it falls on deaf ears.  

-

You and Tara are arguing when Sam leaves. 

“Why do you care so much, Tara?” You ask, voice hot, “You’re scared she’ll try to kiss you again and you won’t be able to resist?” 

“Baby, that’s ridiculous.” Tara says, outraged, “I don’t want to see her again because she upsets you.” 

Sam sighs, and clicks the door closed. 

The sound of both your voices echoing down the hall. 

Your neighbors must hate you. 

When Sam arrives in the library, Quinn’s already there.

“Hey,” She says, voice bright, and then pauses, “Thanks for coming.” 

“It’s my job,” Sam reminds her, voice a little tight. 

“Well, regardless, thanks.” Says Quinn. 

She sets her books down, slips into the seat next to Sam, wide-eyed and eager. Sam appraises her. 

She’s dressed a little inappropriately for a library study session. 

Short skirt, crop top. Her hair in pigtails, face flush with eyeliner and blush. 

Sam ignores the flutter that settles in her belly and pulls up a chair. 

“Was YN mad you decided to tutor me?” Is her first question. 

Sam opens her book, and points to the first sentence. 

“We’re not talking about them,” She says. 

Quinn chews her lips. 

“I don’t want to get you in trouble,” Quinn says, “You seem really nice, Sam, you don’t deserve that.” 

“Quinn.” Sam says, a little on edge. 

Like she’s starting to think this is a mistake. 

“Sorry,” Says Quinn, settling onto her elbows, “You’re right. Let’s not talk about them. Tell me all about the Yom Kippur War.” 

And Sam does. 

It’s a little difficult. 

Much more difficult than teaching her other students. Quinn doesn’t take her eyes off her. She plays with her hair, bats her eyelids, licks her lips. 

Sam clears her throat, starting to feel like prey. 

But then Quinn changes the topic. 

“I hope you’re ready to be the most consistent person in my life, Sam,” She says, blowing her hair out of her eyes, “Every night. I think if you were to define my dating life, comedy would be the word that springs to mind.” 

Sam raises her eyebrows. 

“Mine too,” She mumbles. 

Quinn rolls her eyes and sighs. 

“Tell me about it. I always pick the wrong guy,” Says Quinn, sounding a little frustrated, “Or girl most recently. Always the emotionally unavailable ones - or the physically unavailable ones. I think there's something wrong with me. Like a romance disease.” 

Sam cracks a smile. 

“I think we’ve got the same illness,” She teases, “I have a similar track record.” 

Quinn sits a little straighter. 

“Oh, yeah?” She asks, “Like who?”

Flashes of Richie blindsight Sam. His smile. His laugh. They way he’d kissed her.

The way he’d lied to her. 

Tried to literally murder her sister. 

Sam swallows, bad taste suddenly filling her mouth. 

“No-one,” She says, hurriedly, “Just a bad ex-boyfriend.” 

Quinn nods. 

“I have a few of those,” She says, and then she bites her lip. 

Sam reverts to feeling like prey. Something weird simmers in the depths of her belly as she meets Quinn’s piercing gaze. 

“Have you only had boyfriends?” Quinn enquiries suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere.  

Sam’s eyes flicker up. 

“Enough about boyfriends,” She says, clearing her throat, “Back to the Yom Kippur War.” 

Quinn’s smile is sly. 

“I’ll take that as a no.” 

“I’ve only had boyfriends, and I only ever will.” Sam says, voice flat, “Now, the war.” 

“How come?” Quinn blinks, wide-eyed, “You never wondered? You never tried it?” 

“No,” Sam says, “Quinn, please.”

Quinn bites her lip. 

“Fine,” She says, with a stretch, “I’ll stop busting your balls.” 

Her eyes flicker up to Sam’s. 

“As long as you remember - balls aren’t the only option.” 

-

Mindy howls over lunch. 

“It’s not that funny, Mindy,” Sam says, looking around. Well aware people are starting to stare, “Hey, shut up. I’m in a crisis here.” 

Mindy draws her shoulders. Takes a deep breath. But her face breaks out immediately. 

Her laugh turns into a snort. 

“I’m sorry, Sam, it’s just too good-“ She says, between breaths, “She really said that?” 

Sam nods. It sets Mindy off once more. 

“Damn this girl has an agenda,” Mindy says, still laughing, “She wants into those Carpenter panties, she really doesn’t care who’s wearing them.” 

“Stop being gross and help me,” Sam hisses. 

“Just tell her you like dick,” Mindy says, with a shrug, finally calming down. 

“I think we’ve established I tried that already,” Says Sam, cheeks flushed, “I get the impression no means yes to her. You know what - I know it for a fact.” 

She chews her lip. 

“Maybe I should just quit.” 

“Relax, Sam,” Says Mindy, with a groan, “This Quinn girl - she’s persistent, sure. But I doubt she’s dangerous or anything. Worst she’ll do is try to kiss you. Hey, then maybe you can put her in a headlock too. Give you and Tara something to bond about.” 

Sam glares. 

Mindy holds back another laugh. 

“Look - say you quit - then what? You get another job, waiting tables or working at a movie theater and hate your life. More than you already hate it.” 

Sam scowls. 

“I don’t hate my life,” She says. 

Mindy nods. 

“Sure, but you don’t love it. Let’s see,” She lists them off on her fingers, “No college degree, no boyfriend, no parents, your friends are a bunch of kids you used to babysit, and your alarm is having to listen to your sister take her girlfriend to pound town every morning.” 

Sam’s ears flame red. 

“You’re disgusting,” She says, voice flat, “And my life is just fine, thank you.” 

Mindy shrugs. 

“If you say so,” She says, slurping at her milkshake. She pauses, “God, that just made me sad. Maybe you should bang Quinn.” 

“Very helpful,” Sam grumbles, as she stands, “Thanks Mindy.” 

-

Sam gets home late - on purpose. 

The last thing she wants to do is deal with the changing winds of Tara’s mood swings. Or even worse - the “I told you so”, which she’s sure is to come. 

She hits the gym. 

Tries to decompress her own thoughts. 

Quinn is only trying to get close to Tara, she reasons, Quinn wants you because she can’t have your sister. 

Her treadmill jog turns into a sprint. 

And you’re straight.  

It’s dark by the time Sam gets home. 

But when she enters the apartment, expecting an empty living room - Tara’s sprawled across the couch. 

The lights are out, and Sam squints as she makes out her sister's figure. 

Tara sits up, like she’s been waiting for her. 

Storm in her eyes. 

“I hope you’re happy with yourself,” Says Tara, arms crossed. The couch has been transformed into a makeshift bed, in which she is clearly sleeping in. 

Alone. 

“Your new best buddy Quinn has caused disarray in my relationship.” 

Sam sighs, setting down her bag. 

“What happened?” She asks, reaching into the fridge for a beer. Alcohol is always necessary when Tara is like this. 

Tara crosses her arms. 

“You know what happened,” She says, “We got rid of Quinn and you brought her back into our lives.” 

“Quinn’s not in your life, Tara,” Sam reminds her, “She’s barely in mine. You really think she’s worth picking arguments over?” 

Tara frowns. 

“I didn’t pick an argument,” Tara says, “You’re the one who brought it up.” 

“And so you’re sleeping on the couch?” Sam asks, eyebrows raised, “What did you say?” 

Tara huffs. 

“Why do you always assume it was me who said something?” She asks.

“Because it usually is.” Sam retorts. She lifts the beer to her lips and takes a long swig. 

Tara’s quiet. 

“I just suggested we should… maybe help you look for a new job or something.” 

Sam stares. 

“Make you quit your job, is what I said, I think.” Tara says, a little sheepish, “YN’s mad because she doesn’t think I treat you well, or whatever. But I told her you don’t care about that. We’re sisters, we treat each other badly. That’s just how it goes.” 

She looks over to Sam, expectantly. Like she’s waiting for her to agree. 

Sam blinks. A sharp wave of hurt flushes through her chest that she can’t quite swallow. 

“I don’t treat you badly, Tara, I love you.” Says Sam after a long moment. There’s pain in her chest, making her words hard to get out, “I flew across the country for you. I’m living in a shoebox apartment infested with cockroaches for you. I fought Ghostface for you.” 

Tara blinks. 

“I tell you I love you everyday, before I leave, do you know that?” Sam asks, eyebrows crinkled, “But you never say it back. Why do you never say it back?” 

Tara just stares, eyes owlish. 

Sam might cry. 

Mindy’s half-cocked summary of her life had also made Sam a little sad. Because what does she have, truly? 

No boyfriend, no friends, a sister who treats her less than human. Like Sam’s a piece of dog-shit on the bottom of her shoe that she can’t quite shake. 

She won’t cry in front of Tara. 

Sam drops the empty beer bottle to the counter and rubs her eyes. Her sadness momentarily turns to anger. 

“I do everything for you,” Sam tells her, after a long moment, “But I love this job. This time you can do something for me. You can accept it.” 

-

When Sam leaves in the morning, the apartment is strangely somber. 

Tara’s avoiding Sam. You’re not talking to Tara. Sam’s not talking to anyone.

You don’t really talk to anyone, nowadays, anyway, she thinks, and then bats away the dreary thought. 

She spends the day on auto-pilot. Tries to will away the self-deprecating hatred brewing in the pit of her stomach. 

Quinn’s smiling when she finally makes her way into the library. 

Maybe the only person in her life happy to see her. 

It’s a sad thought, even for Sam. 

“Joe’s in the best pizza,” Quinn gushes, touching her arm, a little bit into their study session, “Now you live in New York you’ve got to get serious about this kind of thing.” 

Sam bites her lip. 

“I don’t know how much longer I’ll be in town anyway,” Says Sam, “I’m thinking about going home.”

Quinn tilts her head. 

“How come?” 

Sam shakes her head. 

“I’m just- I’m in Tara’s space. It’s not good for our relationship.” 

Quinn hums. 

Sam blinks. 

“Sorry,” She says, catching herself, “I don’t know why I’m telling you all this. Let’s start on the next chapter.” 

“Tara won’t have any space if you leave her here,” Quinn says, tilting her chin, “Believe me. I lived in that apartment. I know how expensive it is.” 

“It’s an expensive shit-hole,” Sam mumbles, “You know every shower I’ve had this week has been cold?” 

Quinn nods, sympathetically. 

“I remember.” 

Sam surveys her for a moment. 

Her brows crease. And her curiosity gets the better of her. 

“Why’d you do it, anyway?” She asks, “Go for my sister? I mean, five minutes alone with the two of them and anyone could see how in love they are.” 

Quinn shifts. 

Averts her gaze, suddenly shy. 

It makes Sam frown. 

“I don’t know,” Quinn says, after a long moment, “Your sister- she seems like a really good girlfriend. I’ve only had bad boyfriends. Maybe I just wanted a change. Someone to treat me right, for once.” 

“And you really thought you could do it?” Sam asks, eyebrow raised, “Seduce her?” 

“No,” Quinn admits, “But it was fun to try. I like that. People I can’t have.”

Sam quirks an eyebrow. 

“You’re lucky YN didn’t beat your ass,” Sam says, the ghost of a smile on her lips, “I’ve seen her do much worse.” 

Quinn licks her lips. 

“Your sister is really beautiful,” She says, after a moment, “But you’re much prettier. Supermodel pretty.” 

The back of Sam’s neck prickles. 

Quinn scoots in a little closer.  

Their thighs touch. A spark flushes through Sam’s body, embering into wildfire before Sam can get a grip on it. 

Quinn’s lips are red. Her blue eyes are dilated. In the glow of the library-light, Sam could almost lean in…

Instead, she stands. Snapping up like she might die if she doesn’t. 

“Quinn,” She says, voice flustered, “I’m not stupid, I know what you’re trying to do.”

Quinn blinks. She cocks her head, dark eyes flashing with innocence. 

“And what am I trying to do?” 

“You couldn’t have Tara, so you’re throwing yourself at me,” Sam says, voice firm, “You think you’re slick, Quinn, but I see right through you.” 

Quinn tilts her head. 

“I just said you were prettier than her.” She says, “Your sister - she’s nice. She’s cute in a pedestrian sort of way. But you - you’re beautiful. Maybe the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.” 

Sam can’t help the blush that stems from the bloom in her stomach and sprouts beet red in her cheeks. 

Quinn Bailey can talk. 

But Sam isn’t falling for it. 

“I’ve got to go,” She says, slinging her back over her arm, “I have- plans.” 

There are no plans. Sam hopes it isn’t obvious. 

Quinn purses her lips. 

“Anywhere fun?” She asks, easy smile on her lips, “Maybe I could come?” 

“Bye, Quinn,” Sam says, voice firm. 

And all but stumbles out of the library with Quinn watching. 

-

“Mindy,” Sam groans, down the phone line on her walk home, “You have to help me. I’m in trouble. Big trouble.” 

“Let me guess,” Mindy says. She sounds like she’s out somewhere - at a bar, or a particularly echoey house party, “You have a big fat hickey on your neck courtesy of one Quinn Bailey?” 

Sam’s cheeks flame. 

“I’m straight, Mindy,” She says, though her voice hovers, “You know that. Quinn - she won’t stop. She threw herself at me again tonight.” 

“Well, maybe you should just let her fuck you,” Mindy suggests, unhelpfully. She sounds a little drunk, “The girl likes what she can’t have so let her have you. Then she’ll leave you alone.” 

“That is some particularly unhelpful logic,” Snaps Sam, “Where are you, anyway? It sounds like there’s three of you.” 

“We’re at one of Chad’s lame house parties,” Says Mindy, “God, your sister’s in a mood, you know that? She’s scaring off all the cute girls. Not even YN can calm her down.”

“Oh,” Says Sam, stopping in her tracks, “You’re throwing a party? Who’s there?” 

“Me, Tara, YN, Chad, Liv,” Says Mindy, without a beat, “Plus every other freshman on campus. Chad tried to get some seniors to come, but he’s a little far off becoming the campus hotshot again.” 

Something pangs deep within Sam’s chest. 

Loneliness coils like a snake around her heart, tugging, tugging, tugging. 

The line is quiet, and Mindy seems to realize her mistake. 

“You don’t want to be here though Sam, it’s super lame. Just freshmen.” She says, hurriedly. 

“Of course not.” Sam says, trying to keep her voice light.

Why would she want to be there? At some lame party with kids four years younger than her, drinking like it’s the first - and last - drop of alcohol they’ve ever had in their lives. 

Because, sings that little voice in the back of her head, every friend you have in this city is there. And not one thought to invite you. Not even your own sister.

“You can come if you want,” Mindy suggests, a moment later, “I’m really sorry, Sam, I didn’t even think-” 

Sam bites her lip. Hard. 

“The last thing I want to do is watch a bunch of kids get wasted off keg-stands,” Sam says. She takes in a breath, and she doesn’t know why - but she’s desperate for Mindy to believe her, “Enjoy the party, Mindy, I’ll talk to you in the morning.” 

“Sure,” Mindy echoes, “Night, Sam.” 

-

It really is pathetic, Sam thinks as she pours herself a large glass of wine, your life. It’s pathetic. 

It’s Friday night. 

She should be out. She should be drinking and partying with friends her own age. She should be dancing in a club, dragging a stranger home and regretting it in the morning. 

What she shouldn’t be doing - is lounging around in her sister’s apartment, drinking by herself. She shouldn’t be moping about an invitation to a party with a friend group that isn’t even hers.

She’s made Tara her world. 

But in Tara’s world, she’s not even a thought. 

Not a sun, not a star, not even a moon. 

Maybe, if she’s lucky, a bit of space-junk Tara can’t quite shake from her orbit.

Pathetic. 

Space-junk, she thinks briefly, that’s a good name for you. A waste of space, more like. 

Sam sinks another glass of wine. 

The buzz feels nice. But the apartment is too quiet. 

Just Sam and her thoughts - a dangerous mix. 

And then - her phone buzzes. Sam has five glasses of wine in her. She answers, without checking who’s calling. 

And her voice catches in her throat when she hears the voice on the other end of the line. 

“Hey stranger,” Says Quinn, “I just wanted to call. I didn’t want to leave our conversation the way it was.” 

Sam pauses. 

She blinks - the room spins. 

“If you’re not interested, I understand,” Continues Quinn, and her voice lowers, “But I think you’ve misunderstood me.” 

Sam’s heartbeat jumps out of her chest. The hairs on the back of her arm raise, something she can’t quite name surges through her veins. 

She swallows, but her mouth is dry. Despite the constant flow of alcoholic lubrication. 

Quinn pauses a moment, and then sighs. 

“I don’t want you because of your sister,” Quinn says, voice graveled, “I want you because you’re beautiful.”

Sam hums. 

She closes her eyes, but she’s still spinning. 

High off alcohol, high off arousal, high off something. 

It feels nice to be wanted, no matter who is doing the wanting. 

She closes her lips, once. Tries to hang up. But she can’t.  

Then, she bites her lip. 

“Come over.”

[evilminji]

Okay but >.> continuing my Marvel thoughts?

I got two of um?

First being? Don't Orange and Green go together? *looks it up* Aaaaaay~ "Direct harmony, also known as complementary colors, means pairing your key color with the color sitting on the opposite side of the color wheel." They DO!!! They're a classic example, in fact!

The Orange Soul Stone? Probably looks REAL good, real NATURAL even, against that Green sky! Bet it REALLY pops! Very stand out statement piece, you know? But? More importantly? That thing is sentient. All of those Pillars of Reality across the various Verses are.

And?

I bet it thought Pariah was a lil bitch.

Rank Vibes. Negative ris. Pick your words for it, the man was NASTY. He was too keep his filthy, filthy World's Conquering hands OFF of this Soul Stone. Something, I imagine? That ALL the Soul Stones agreed with.

Yes, I said all of um.

Because the various Realities each need their own. But! They can and DO work from the Zone, which is the PERFECT place to hide. And honestly? They like to get together and do this thing? Where they're all "oooh~ look at US! We are SUPER IMPRESSIVE Kingly Jewelry~☆! Definitely no important reality bending Rocks Of Great Power HERE! No SIR! We're just tooootally rad jeeeeewelryyyyy~~~☆! Oooooooh~☆"

They like to have fun. :3

Hope Danny likes Orange. Ha ha... trick question. He doesn't have a CHOICE! All SORTS of Death based Reality Pillars are rocking up, in their metaphorical Gucci sweat suits and shades with a margarita, going "oh thank ME, babe. The last guy was AWFUL! You're soooo much better? Now let me rub myself all over you. It's been ages and baby needs to recharge on Death Energy."

Danny hates it? So? So much?

He looks like a GAUDY PIRATE. *nnnnnnyooom!* *THWAP!* *Another reality shaking, highly sacred, Godly Staff of Death or whatever they decided to call it, flys in through a nearby window and nearly concusses him as it smacks itself against his upper back and sticks there*

He looks like a walking junk heap of sacred artifacts.

You ever been pelted by rocks? He has! Little orange rocks! Like fucked up hail! Welcome to kinghood, Danny, have a CONCUSSION! D:< he hates it!

But... but, I mean... At Least It's Not The SWORDS. (Panicked scream of "hit the deck!" from the other room.) (Holy sword number 15 wants to CUDDLE! Bare blade first! Dodge, your Majesty! DODGE!)

So yeah.

Danny? In A MOOD. Not feeling particularly FRIENDLY. It's not anyone's fault, really. But... well... you can't exactly negotiate with these fuckers, you know? Rocks are by NATURE, kinda stubborn.

So he's sitting there. Buried. With what he's pretty sure is a sacred text digging into his side. When a... glowing? Mist? Shows up? Huh. That's new. They don't seem to have a very clear image of "Self". Yet it's crystal clear? Just not... PHYSICAL? It's more... code? He thinks?

TECHNUS! Get over here! And behave!

There is much cooing and delight from Technus. The baby is a marvel. A wonder! Danny waits patiently for Technus to get to the point.

Ah.

He would like to "go back". His Obsession is demanding it.

IS it now? You're what? Maybe a day or so dead? You've been busy, if you've already gathered enough information to make your case like this. Alright, let's hear it, little guy.

It boils down to this. His obsession in death is the same as his primary directive was in life. Protect Mr Stark. Which is especially difficult to do from HERE. Even MORE so when there is a known threat, coming too...

WAIT, WHAT!?

The Souls Stones back him up. Oh yeah. Thanos' a lil bitchbaby loser. He's trying to make Death fall in love with him. Or "balance the universe". Depends on the reality. Totally throwing EVERYTHING out of whack.

And? Look. Danny's job? Isn't to interfere if countries kill each other. Or even planets. Nor entire galaxies, as much as he'd like too. But when you get too "I'm messing with Entire Realities or all of a Singular Reality at once in the specific depart of Death and its subsidiaries" territory? THAT is his job.

Might not be a "I personally have to show up" issue. But it still IS very much his job at that point. He has to delegate. Order the appropriate steps be taken. Cause yeah, there may be countless millions every day of such instances? But it IS his job to metaphorically order the roads repaired and the building inspected.

Sudden MASS "immigration"?

That causes Lair disputes. Confusion. Too many ghosts in too small an area. And WORSE, if people start playing with Death Pillars? The Zone might get dragged into whatever nonsense they're up too! It's like children playing with heavy machinery! Put that DOWN! Cease! Desist!!

And then? Clockwork shows up looking Mildly Miffed(TM). O:> dear lord. What madness has he stumbled upon? Oh. Oh of COURSE. First the "balancing" dude and now they're going to be playing with time travel. THATS IT. Someone unburying me!

I'm gonna go menace some humans that might actually believe I'm scary! Frighty! Pack up and shine your armor! Your coming too! We're escorting the baby home then have a Talk(tm) with the local Grape Ceral!

@hypewinter @lolottes @mutable-manifestation @nerdpoe @hdgnj

[inbarfink]

Alrighty, friends, it’s time for a lil project I’ve been working on for a while now. It’s time for…

MY VERY BIG ZIM VS. DIB SCOREBOARD

I am going to go through all of the (finished) episodes of Invader Zim that feature both Zim and Dib (at least two lines of dialogue from each, so that I won’t have to worry about weird edge-cases like “Bestest Friends” or “Abducted”) and count which of these two won at that specific confrontation/misadventure. Each episode is worth a point, a two-parter is worth two points (since they tend to be higher-stakes). 

I will give them both a point if they both equally won and I won’t give any points at all if they both lost… but I am only going to use it in true tie/no win situations. Most ‘Zim vs Dib’ episodes have some elements of both of them losing on some level. If only because their main goals - conquer the planet and unmask Zim to the world - can never actually happen without breaking the status-quo of the show. So I am going to do my best to judge, like, their goals for that specific episode, and how humiliated and/or hurt they got, or at least which one of them lost the least at any given episode.

I will also be judging the win/lose situation while taking the conclusion of the episode at face value. Because Invader Zim loves its implausible snapbacks where a character dies or ends up at a seemingly-impossible cliffhanger situation at the end of an episode - and then the next one starts with everything back to normal again. After some deliberation, I decided to still take into account obviously-not-going-to-remain-in-continuity losses as losses. So if Dib fucking dies at the end of an episode, that would still be a Victory for Zim, even if obviously he would be back in the next episode. 

Okay, so let’s start! With the start!

"The Nightmare Begins"

This one is pretty clear cut. Zim wasn’t even trying to take over the world yet, just to blend in. And he pretty much succeeded in that goal, while Dib failed to capture him and lost the ‘Alien Sleep Cuffs’ in the process. 

I was maybe considering if Zim's little ‘MY SPINE!’ right as the episode ended could change the score. But I think this is just a minor-yet-painful injury, rather than an Implied-Reset-Comedy-Death. And I think for both of them this matters less than Zim successfully or unsuccessfully fulfilling his missions. 

So the first two points (since this is a double-length) go to Zim!

"Nanozim"

So here we have our first classic Mutually Assured Failure situation with these two. They both failed in their overarching goals in that episode. Dib lost those pictures of Zim for good, and Zim failed to rid himself of Dib for good. Buuut, I think Zim got a lot more Physical Pain 

And got a lot more thoroughly humiliated in his defeat

So I am counting this as a point for Dib!

"Parent Teacher Night"

Yet another episode where Zim is only concerned with maintaining his cover. Since this is preserving the status quo of the show, I think they’ll inevitably skew in his favor. While stuff got kinda hectic and embarrassing for Zim a couple of times, he did successfully convince everyone that the Robo-Parents are his parents.

And Dib got in trouble for throwing punch.

So this point goes to Zim!

"Dark Harvest"

Zim got away with every horrible disgusting thing he did in this episode, successfully maintained his cover and

Yeah, point to Zim.

"The Wettening"

At first I thought this was going to be a point for Zim since he pretty much unambiguously won that water balloon fight.

But that’s where my ‘take the endings of the episode at face value’ rule comes into play, because Zim drowned in his toilet and died at the end of the episode!

Zim: Help! My head is stuck! GIR! Help! I can't breathe, I…

So for literally being the Last Man Standing in the conflict, Dib technically wins this round!

"Career Day"

More Mutually Assured Defeat!

Dib thoroughly failed to demonstrate to Bill that Zim is an alien, but while Zim successfully maintained his cover - he still got fired from McMeaties, which torpedoed his then-current world-domination schemes.

Zim: 8 billion! That is more than the entire population! And they all serve McMeatie? If I rule McMeaties… I rule the world!

(I mean obviously that wouldn’t have actually worked but.... to be honest, I suspect that even if Dib did get Bill to personally witness Zim’s molt it wouldn’t have helped him either. They were both kinda running fool’s errands in that episode, I think. Dib’s self-delusion was just more subtle.)

I mulled over it for a while, and I decided this is probably our first true ‘No Points Either Way’ Episode! Congratulations, boys, you both lost!

"Planet Jackers"

Zim fully achieved the goal he was working towards in this episode - rescuing the Earth from the Planet Jackers. While this is technically something Dib would’ve also wanted if only he had believed Zim, I am not going to give Dib any points - because Dib basically missed out on the ego-boost he gets every time he successfully defends the Earth. 

Plus, the Moon crashing into the Earth at the end there is probably not something Zim would be worried about - who cares if a few million humans die as long as the planet’s still here for him to conquer! But it might bother Dib a little bit. You know if he was aware of it.

"Rise of the Zitboy"

Zim successfully got the information he needed to improve his security system, while Dib was left without the blindspot he planned on using and he needed to clean up all of the disgusting alien pus all on his own. The point goes to Zim. 

"Bad, Bad Rubber Piggy"

Look, yeah, Dib did get beat up by the Lawn Gnomes by the end of that episode. And I’m sure that hurts. But you know what I bet probably hurt more?

Having your brain teleported out of your body!

PAK or no, I think that warrants counting Dib as having lost the Least in that episode, and so the point goes to him!

"A Room With a Moose"

While it was a tad humiliating, Dib did still manage to successfully save the lives of himself and his classmates. I mean, even Zim knows that he lost. Which is not that common for him.

Zim: No! The moose has failed me!

So that’s another point to Dib!

"Hamstergeddon"

While Zim’s evil scheme did not go as he planned, it did still cause a lot of death and destruction for the human race - which he is always in favor of. He managed to get rid of Ultra-Peepi before he actually caused damage to his base and got away with everything scot-free. And while Dib also wanted Ultra-Peepi gone, he did also get humiliated and ignored and placed in the Crazy Bucket. Point goes to Zim.

"Bloaty's Pizza Hog"

Gaz: There, see, you won. Eat your pizza.

Can’t argue with that logic! Point to Dib!

"Door to Door"

So while Zim technically won the fundraiser, it is important to remember what Dib’s actual goals were for competing with Zim in the fundraiser to begin with.

Dib: The only reason I'm selling this dirt in a wrapper is to watch you fail at something else, Zim!

The only reason that he wanted to win, is because he wanted to see Zim get humiliated. And he surely got his wish by the way the episode ended.

Plus he got that handy box of [Adhesive Medical Strips]! Point to Dib!

"Bolognius Maximus"

Both lost, zero points each.

"Battle of the Planets"

Okay, so we have a classic example of the ‘Dib foils Zim’s attempts to take over the world, Zim foils Dib’s attempt to expose him’ runaround, but I think in this context - with Zim sustaining a lot more physical injuries - 

And Dib actually getting to meet an ally in this episode - 

That this is a victory for Dib! A two-point victory for a two-parter!

"Halloween Spectacular of Spooky Doom"

While the two were basically working towards the same overall goal in that episode despite their constant double-crosses (get back home safely, foil the Halloweenies’ invasion plan) and those two goals were achieved by the end…

Zim still ended that adventure with a broken skeleton (according to himself)

Zim: As soon as my skeleton stops being broken, I'm going to destroy you, Dib.

While Dib ended up seemingly totally unharmed and with a lollipop for his troubles! Two more points to Dib!

"Mysterious Mysteries"

Zim successfully maintained his cover, got Dib publicly humiliated on national television and made even LESS likely that Dib will ever be invited on MM ever again. Point goes to Zim!

"Future Dib"

Well, Dib did at least successfully foil Zim’s plan to basically destroy all life on Earth. Buuut… he ends that episode still captured, with Gaz not really giving a shit about saving him, and implicitly tormented by a monkey for Zim’s amusement for the rest of his natural life. 

Obviously that gets reset by the next episode but like I said, I’m not taking those into account. The point goes to Zim!

"Walk For Your Lives"

Well, Zim’s plan succeeded… but that just means that he failed. His actual goal was to impress the Tallests for Probing Day and obviously he did not manage to do that at all.

And Dib also failed since he was trying to warn others and stop Zim. And… I think the implication at the end of the episode is that he probably died, with "you jerk!" as his last words. While Zim is burned, but alive and well. So… Zim does still win this one by default! Truly Zim’s most incredible talent is being able to pull a technical victory out of the most thoroughly embarrassing situations. 

"Megadoomer"

Yet another Mutually Assured Failure. Zim failed to kill Dib again, Dib failed to expose Zim again. They both lost the devices they were planning to use to achieve this goal (the Megadoomer exploded and Dib lost his camera to a random bird) and yet they still both claimed victory.

But thinking about the little details… While Dib ‘liked that camera’ it is probably a bit more replaceable than the Megadoomer was. And Dib was at least physically unharmed through that whole encounter, while Zim got crushed by a giant hunk of metal. So the point goes to Dib!

"Lice"

Well, Dib was pretty embarrassed to discover that the Lice Queen was real and he was forced to admit he was wrong and apologize…. But Zim got gruesomely skinned alive

AND as an added bonus, his pain is only going to lead to humanity being better equipped to deal with the lice menace. Which obviously he’d hate. Point to Dib for Suffering Less in that episode!

"Dib's Wonderful Life of Doom"

At first, I kinda debated what to do about this episode. Because while it’s true that Zim accomplished the goal he was trying to achieve in that episode and Dib seems to feel pretty humiliated at the end of the whole ordeal…

There’s no doubt that this whole scheme was an extremely flagrant misuse of resources and - since we know that at the very least the Meekrob’s planet exist and that the fact about the Massive’s side pods is accurate

Dib: The Massive; the armada capital ship. The side pods are filled with snacks. It's their weak spot.

Lard Nar: Ahem, well… If we can just knock a hole in one of the side storage pods, we can steal the snacks that fall out to feed the growing resistance.

Zim actually revealed to Dib some actual dangerous tactical information about the Irken Empire’s weaknesses. 

However, I mulled that over and I decided that

If I were to penalize Zim every time his scheme is a stupid/humiliating misuse of resources then this actually applies to almost every Zim vs. Dib episode actually. The question is whatever or not Zim accomplished his goals, rather than if there was a more practical way to accomplish them because the answer to that second question is pretty much always ‘yes’

The fact Dib has technically gotten some useful tactical information from that little simulation has literally never come up again in the actual Invader ZIm canon. As far as we know, he just literally forgot to write it down and now he has no idea.

So yeah, that point still goes to Zim. Even if by a very small margin.

"Tak: The Hideous New Girl"

I was considering making this our first ‘both of them get a point!’ (or well, two points, since this is a double-length episode) since they were both working towards the same goal of protecting the Earth from Tak and they both succeeded!

But… I think I am actually going to give these points to Dib, because Zim only managed to preserve his Status Quo. Dib actually made progress. Between finally getting a good look at Zim’s base, and getting some more info on the Empire

Dib: Your leaders are just taller than everyone else?

And, of course, getting one fun little gift at the end.

"Backseat Drivers From Beyond the Stars"

The entire gimmick of this episode is Zim having just so many things to worry about at once. He’s got this new Brain Parasite scheme, and he’s trying to bring the Tallests to Earth to check it out, and he’s trying to wrangle up the Robo-Parents and maintain his cover. And by the end of the episode, he only really succeeded in ‘maintaining his cover’ and even that just by the technicality that most Humans in this world are just so stupid and apathetic that he just shouldn’t have bothered probably. By the end of the episode the Robo-Parents are still running wild, his Brain Parasite plan has gone to hell and his plans for the Massive have gone wrong in every possible way.

Now, Dib has also suffered some losses in this episode - the spy-bug in Zim’s base got disabled and the activation of Tak’s Personality in her ship is obviously a huge drawback to that whole plan of repairing it and making it his own. Buuut… at least he didn’t get his brain eaten. So I think he at least won this round. Two more points to Dib!

"Mortos Der Soul Stealer"

While Zim got himself Touched by a Smelly Human and lost a few of his genetically-engineered rodents - the implication seems to be that he has more and this is at best a minor setback to his plan. Meanwhile, Dib didn’t just lose the chance to use basically a magical superweapon against Zim - he also lost a lot of money and then got arrested.

So yeah, the point goes to Zim.

"Zim Eats Waffles"

Nothing about Dib’s plan to expose Zim in that episode worked in his favor and ended with his entire computer being smashed up by Cyborg Zombie Soldiers Created by a Giant Flesh-Eating Demon Squid. Meanwhile, while Zim forgot his Evil Plan for the day - the fact that he sent these aforementioned Cyborg Zombie Soldiers after humanity has got to count for something. Plus he ate some waffles! Point to Zim!

"The Girl Who Cried Gnome"

While both Zim’s attempt to utilize the Moofy Media Storm for his own humanity-destruction plans and Dib’s attempt to do the same in order to expose Zim have thoroughly failed - Zim literally ends this episode whistling ‘If You Happy And You Know It’ as he torments Dib while he is stuck in his yard indefinitely. 

Yeah, Zim won that round as well.

"Dibship Rising"

Okay so that episode ends with the Dibship throwing Zim to the horizon. And then he saves Dib’s life.... only to leave Dib stuck in the cesspool for hours as he recounts every embarrassing thing that happened to him before the ship can properly delete his own personality. 

But while this seems to be a pretty humiliating and kinda uncomfortable (“the smell’s getting to me”) situation for Dib. I… think that being thrown to that distance would still probably hurt more. Plus, Dib did still make progress with the Ship since he successfully deleted Tak’s personality (I mean that didn’t stick with the Comic and Florpus Canons but we’re not even looking at those today, so…)

Point to Dib!

"Vindicated!"

Zim: Sad little Dib! No more ally and no more proof!

Yeah, Point to Zim.

"The Voting of the Doomed"

This one’s actually kinda hard. So… Dib’s plan succeeded and Zim’s failed - but that just means Zim was spared from becoming a brainwashed pawn of the school board. But is it more humiliating that you worked so hard for a plan that only ended up saving your enemy? Or that you worked so hard for a plan that would’ve doomed you if not for the intervention of your enemy?

Both Zim and Dib seem to assume it’s the former, so, yeah, point to Zim!

"Gaz, Taster of Pork"

While not inflicted by Zim, Dib sure had his fair share of Suffering in that episode. Meanwhile, as far as we can tell, Zim’s Exploding Monkeys Plan went off without a hitch. I mean, Dib or not Dib, I’m sure Zim can find a way to mess it up all on his own - but that was still probably less humiliating than

Yeah, so Zim kinda wins the two points by default. 

"The Frycook What Came From All That Space"

So despite going through a lot of painful and grueling and humiliating things in this episode - Zim still won at the end, he still achieved everything he wanted to do: escape Foodcourtia, return to Earth and resume his mission. 

Meanwhile, Dib once again failed to convince anyone Zim is an alien 

And his attempt to use Zim’s absence to gather information from the Tallests seems to have been thoroughly derailed.

So I think this point goes to Zim!

"The Most Horrible X-mas Ever"

So… Zim's plan has failed and derailed into a threat to himself more than anything - only to be saved by Dib (who earned some sort of Bonding Moment with his dad in the meantime) and together, they (but mostly Dib) throw Santa into space. And then Dib gives a heartfelt speech.

.....And then Zim convincely impersonates the Easter Platypus and incites an angry mob against Dib.

This is probably the episode I mulled over the most, and not just because it’s the last one. I was really unsure if I should prioritize everything Dib has accomplished in the episode - or Zim for getting the last laugh… literally!

But I think, after some deliberation, that yeah, those last two points go to Zim. It was kind of a close-call, but by the end of the episode banishing Santa was a victory for both of them and inciting a mob against the other is something they would both find a meaningful victory - so I think it’s got to count for something???

Final Score:

Zim: 22

Dib: 17

And now I can quite honestly say

VICTORY! VICTORY FOR ZIM!

(But also, like, I think Dib got a pretty good score too. Especially considering his reputation as a universal butt monkey, that gap could’ve been a lot larger. I mean if we counted ‘Enter the Florpus’ as.. by my logic like seven points we’d have a total turnabout)

And of course, this is just my own methodology of counting victories, like you've seen, I have a lot of Weird Edge Cases that you could make arguments on either way. If you have, like, your own interpretations and your own ways of counting victories for these two Ultimate Losers, I’d love to hear it! 

[anxresi]

…Isn’t it a bit late for April Fools Day?! 🤡🤣

I was going to just write a few snarky remarks in the tags, but fuck it… I have a bit of time on my hands right now, so let’s tackle these somewhat disingenuous statements one at a time shall we? Starting from the one in the top left hand corner, and working our way anti-clockwise around… *Cracks knuckles*

1. Yep. SO nice in fact, she doesn’t have any other noticeable character trait. ‘Niceness’ by itself doesn’t make you an interesting, intriguing or compelling character… it just makes you boring. In fact, I’m gonna have to work pretty damn hard to finish this off before I nod off just thinking about her… 🥱

2. …And this is a GOOD thing? It just proves how much the writers were DESPERATE to make her Chloe’s replacement they rushed virtually everything to do with her, including her rapid induction to ‘Hero’. Most of the other Miraculous users had to wait AGES to get their chance, and Lil Miss Perfect just turns up in Paris and gets her chance virtually the first day. It wasn’t earned, it wasn’t believable… it was just handed to her on a silver platter because… reasons. 😩

3. So what? This is just yet more evidence that this girl, a TOTAL STRANGER up to S4 is all of a sudden being treated like the queen of all Mary Sues. Just listen to all the endless shilling about her from the rest of the cast (especially Marinette and, more depressingly Plagg) Now imagine them said in Thomas Astruc’s voice as he lays his case against Chloe… and everything should become clear.

4. This means virtually nothing. Everyone gets their Miraculous permanently at the end of S5, so the fact she gets her’s 5th is just down to a quirk in sequence. If anything, I’m surprised she didn’t get it sooner… in another gratuitous ‘Take That’ to diehard Chloe fans… 😬

5. I don’t even have anything to say about this.. it calculates the precise sum of 0.00% in terms of her worth of a character. You got anything better?

6. Oh, you mean the same acting ‘skills’ that she used to manipulate her sister into pretending she ‘loved’ her and to carry that useless charm about?The thing is, everyone might’ve SAID her talent was great in that AWFUL Queen Banana episode… but it actually wasn’t. Just because the other characters say she’s the next Sophia Loren, doesn’t mean the viewers don’t have eyes and ears. But I guess if they’re stupid enough to fall for Lila’s incredibly obvious lies when the plot demands it, anything’s possible…

7. What, you like her colorful shoes? This is possible the only one I’ll grant you (they ARE pretty snazzy) but at the end of the day, they’re just pointless aesthetics. Anyone else could be wearing them, and the garish colors can’t blind us to her all-conquering mediocrity. Moving on…

8. Here’s a hint: NEVER use the word ‘objectively’ when the opposite is clearly true. She’s not just ‘sweet’, spending time with her is akin to being pinned down in Wonka’s chocolate factory being force-fed candy by all the Oompa-Lumpas until you literally explode. Not a pleasant experience in other words, thanks to the writers laying this sole facet on with a literal trowel and shovel.

As for the ‘sass’ part… nope, not seeing it. Unless you mean the occasional scene when she ‘deals’ with her sister… these parts were obviously only put in to throw red meat for the Chloe-hating sheep out there could hoot and holler at the screen (probably waking their parents up in the process) whilst screaming “SEE? THAT’S WHAT YOU GET!!” Well, I hope you’re happy now. You hapless lame-o’s.

9. Mary Sues don’t get ‘character assassinated’. They get bigged-up, cheered, given every resource in the show to be Da Best… but NEVER wrecked in that manner. Her sister, on the other hand… 😢

I would argue though, that what she is, is WORSE than character assassination… she’s an individual that never should’ve existed in the first place. In fact, I’d barely even describe her as a character. A plot device, a waste of space, a product of Thomas Astruc’s inexplicable raging hatred against Chloe maybe, but not a serious character. As the popular meme goes, Change My Mind (you won’t).

10. …You’re REALLY scraping the bottom of the barrel now, aren’t you?

Besides, this hasn't even been confirmed yet. We don't even know anything about the elusive Mr Lee, or even what he might think about his daughter being forcibly adopted by the Mayor. Something which I'm sure a show of such grandiosity and ambition will go into at great length.. Nah, just kidding!

Next, you’ll be telling me that somehow her sexuality is another reason to think she’s the best thing since sliced bread…

11. And there we have it (sigh). How terribly predictable. 🙄

I’ve already done a whole post thingie about how her being a lesbian and having a short-lived crush on Marinette was just imposed to get unearned brownie points from underrepresented communities when they won’t actually do anything with said revelation, so I’ll keep this short. Sufficed to say though, I feel like starting a hashtag… #TheGaysDeserveBetterThanZoe. Get it trending, peeps! 😎

12. Whatever you’re smoking, can I have some of it? This is crossing the line from ‘delusional’ to ‘crazy’ now. She’s remained as static as a statue since her opening episode, has NO room for change and growth due to the fact she was only brought in to replace Chloe and in that uncomfortably dull niche she’ll stay. Sorry, but just because you wish that she’d had any kind of interesting development doesn’t mean she has. Facts have a funny habit of getting in the way of the truth.

13. In turns of ticking boxes for diversity, French-Americans aren’t exactly a high priority IMHO. But sure if you think that makes her the bees knees (pun intended), you go ahead and celebrate it. 👍

14. So in conclusion, I do agree that Zoe Lee is indeed ‘Best’ character… (hears sharp intake of breathes all round) oops, I’m sorry. What I meant was ‘Pest’ character… in that just having her buzzing about in all her flawless Mary-Sue glory makes you just wanna reach for the bug spray.

You know, like you would for a pesky wasp during a delicious picnic. Because she’s Vesperia, get it? 🤪

The only upside to this sad situation is, from what I can tell (being strictly a non-watcher these days, you figure out why) the writers half-agree with me.

After all for such an 'amazing' character who's apparently achieved so much in her short time in the show... why is she barely featured? They must know, somewhere down deep in their artistic brains, she's a narrative dead zone.

A collection of tiresome off-the-shelf quirks, traits and spare parts (someone here said she was like a bad fanfiction self-insert... ABSOLUTELY RIGHT), loosely held together with visible stitching and hastily assembled together like Frankenstein's Monster for the most cynical of reasons.

She has no arguable reason to be in the show, apart from being a far inferior replacement to the potential mine of character development that someone like Chloe could've represented.

I guess Thomas really does hate complex characters who may overshadow his precious Marinette... or school bullies who traumatized him so much as a lil kid he specifically wrote someone into his show he could subsequently and systematically destroy (as the rumors go... but it wouldn't surprise me with THAT guy).

Now I’m off to bed, but let me end on at least ONE positive note for this much-maligned individual: She’s EXACTLY the kind of character a show like Miraculous Ladybug deserves… and if you like her, you deserve her too.

Now, good night. 🌝 🛌

[mobblespsycho100]

👍 kabru, heh

thank you so much mwahaha

1. Bottom Line by Dom Fera

I think this song is very Kabru in a this has big "customer service" vibes, lmao.

"Drive me somewhere you've been liking" -> hes a people pleaser, letting someone take the reins while he supports them and hangs back is kind of his thing. Even though he plans stuff out and chooses his words deliberately, sometimes he goes along with ppl's wants and expectations for him a bit too much...

"Order something I don't want, I'll drink it anyway" -> basically Kabru when he had to eat the harpy eggs Laios offered lmao. 'Right, i hate this so much this is Monster. okay. wow i need to kill you' hes literally triggered (in the ptsd term sense and not the. warped internet meaning of it) and he's still like okay ! i will dig in ! to prove a point ! so laios likes and trusts me! (... what point kabru . cmon man. )

"Take a little time, it's funny how you're fine when I'm away -> he needs to be needed. He needs to help others, save them even, to protect them from the tragedy he has experienced. He's used to being dismissed and he does swallow it and take it but ik he was so 🤨😧😠 abt laios ignoring him and all the attempts to get to know him... so its like take a lil tine its funny how ur fine when im away ... Kabru knows Laios is the closest to conquering the dungeon. and hes like. I rlly wanna help u do this but . ik ur probably fine without me (... man he makes me . so 😭)

"It's natural to see a bottom line with me / A bottom line I'll be" -> A bottom line in business is like the final total right. The sum of everything thats written at the bottom. The ultimate outcome... the core. The fate of the dungeon is something he wants to decide and get a say in as well. Even though he knows he isn't the one thats going to conquer it, he chooses to stop Mithrun from beating up Thistle and grabs him and they free fall into that pit. Because he decided, yeah, the fate of this dungeon the one to conquer it has to be us short-lived races/humans. He is such an action oriented character . He makes such decisions. He is so determined to make sure that Utaya doesn't repeat itself. Man.

Anyway that's song 1. moving on to song 2.

2. Smoke and Mirrors by Gotye

This entire song is So Kabru coded its insane to me . but I grabbed these lyrics from Verse 3 Because the last line specifically makes. me go crazy.

"You're a fraud, and you know it" -> the freaking masker . he is such a liar and he knows it... theres not much else to say here. Playing the hero, the saviour, while knowing he doesn't actually have the skills to defeat the dungeon but hes just so desperate . man

"And every night and day you take the stage" -> he should get an acting award fr... always adjusting his personality and carefully planning his steps with each person he interacts with man... also inchtresting to me that he gets to be more #real with Mithrun. thats a whole nother analysis can of worms I won't get into but like they rlly drove each other's character development...

"And it always entertains, you're giving pleasure" -> To quote Holm, Kabru is the typa guy who would do anything to get someone to like him akdjskhf hes so real for that...

"And that's admirable, you tell yourself" -> (kabru voice) im so cool for this ahaha everyone loves me (guy who genuinely fucking loathes himself) /ref

"And so you'd gladly sell yourself to others" -> smile of pain. I just think hes a real business man sometimes . Goodness Kabru stop being a charismatic salesman of your own personality im going to explode .

Right. we're on to the last one I guess...

3. Dear Arkansas Daughter by Lady Lamb

GENUINELY cannot really do this analysis lyric by lyric or I will go ... well. I'll go into the deep end but . like . right. anyway. this set of lyrics above aka the most popular line is very Kabru appearance. (Goodness i need to make an AMV of this. I will one day once the executive dysfunction stops fighting my autistic hyperfixation ass)

THIS WHOLE . SET OF LYRICS IS JUST BIG KABRU VIBES (SOURCE: JUST TRUST ME BRO)... His heart is full of swords... the sword fighter (he is proficient in many weapons)... im not big into tarot (or well i havent researched it much) but the annotations for these lyrics said that its referencing the Three of Swords tarot card, which represents painful sorrow. and like.. man like a fundamental sorrow in Kabru is so oughh its just so . real. and again i need a whole nother analysis post for this since this is already So long

Tie my hands & knock my knees. he is so stressed he is so . nervous all the time and these r like. the freeze . trauma response. to me. he goes freeze and fawn a lot (fawn not specifically with abusers per say but like people pleasing tendencies again) and like kind of visibly looking nervous and stressed out up before saying smth next is smth he does a lot I feel.

And like the vibe of like sinking to the sea with a heavy heart but also being someone who brings hope in a way to others (ex: Rin and Mithrun, he ends up being their anchor and helping them start like living with their lives after the burden of their traumas and hellish experiences) but Kabrus own traumas are so immense and then the person who rises . who foils him and who brings him hope is Laios. like a ripe red apple like. something bright and tempting and also dangerous (smth smth the forbidden fruit symbolism. theres so much . like Kabru that I can dissect with like Biblical symbolism themes but like anyway he sees Laios as both the key to humanity's victory against the dungeon and as sin / a distraction from his goal because Laios makes him do selfish things and its just AAAAHGHH rahhhh. man. im normal)

ANYWAY YEAH ... that wraps this up. Thank you for sending this ask ❣️💌 I am very normal abt Kabru of Utaya dungeon meshi

[lured-into-wonderland]

THEY SAID THEY WERE GODS IN THE SKIES … GREAT TERRORS THAT NO MAN COULD KILL … UGH-HUH …

Dragons were just so annoying. As the great devour of villages would sore through the skies. Something was amiss. As it was breathing fire upwards and then upon itself as well. Twisting and turning in the air as blood rained down on the fields below. Something was happening. Another prick. Another dragon that thought it could do whatever the fuck it wanted. That the people in this area, were nothing more than a source of it’s food. To be devoured, left to grow, build and repopulate and then, be eaten all over again. Nope. It all ends right here and now. Another dragon was about to be killed as it would begin the descent. 

More fire being breathed out as he brought his arm up to shield himself. As he stabbed it once more as hard as he could in the back and then as it started to fall ran up it’s back and stabbed the fucked right in the eye, once, twice, several more times until he dug his hands within and ripped the eye out and tossed it into the skies to crash down as the big bastard would let out a deafening screech. As it would just free fall down from the heavens above and crash into the ground below, sliding all the way through the fields and coming to stop mere inches right before her. Jaws opening once as he stomped his foot hard on it’s head to crack the skull and shatter whatever life was left within it as the mighty jaws of the dragon closed.

“There …”

As he pulled the single chopstick out of it’s skull and cleaned them off on his sleeve. He was covered, head to toe in the blood of this worthy foe. The biggest he had fought with yet, but like all the rest. It never stood a chance. It never had a hope in fuck of killing him, he was not going to die. Not until every single dragon, from every single kingdom, was dead by his hands. As he jumped up and would slide down from it’s head, on the endless blood, bare feet sloshing through it as he came to the end of it’s snouth and jumped off and landing right before her. A twirl of the chopstick he used to kill it as he caught it, placed it in his sleeve and dipped his head down to her.

“Xivrun, Champion Of The Black … champion no more, add him to the list of would be worldly conquers.”

As he stood there. Crimson hair, crimson robes, crimson covered body as he reached out and cupped the side of her face. All of this, was not to protect the people of this land. Yeah. He could of got to it eventually. He would have found this dragon sooner or later, but a damsel in distress. He would drop everything for someone like that. Also. To impress a pretty little thing like her, he would kill a hundred dragons before her eyes. All in her name as well. As his smile would widen a little bit. His hand cupping her cheek and then falling, both of them to her waist to pull her right up against him.

“And they said it could not be done.”

As he glanced back at the dragon for a moment and rolled his eye. Looking back at her with a smile as wide as possible on his face. The one thing he was good at, was dedicating all of his victories to any beautiful maiden. And there was none more pretty and sought after than her. As he would give himself a small little shake, to shake the blood of him onto the ground. She could have all the suitors she fucking wanted. She could have all the lords, all the knights, all the fucking men, in the entire kingdom line up for her, but which one of them, were going to kill a fucking dragon for her, just to try and gain a smile. That was all he wanted, a smile, anything more than that, fuck. That was a bonus for him.

“Well, what do ya think? Betta than all the rest who have sought your hand, but me. I ain’t lookin for your hand lil lady, just a single night and noithin more than that.”

Watching the fight, she wasn’t sure where her heart belonged. With the warrior so fiercely fighting the dragon or with the dragon, who was destined to die. The princess didn’t know. She also didn’t know, where the certainty was coming from, but Nunnally expected the result of this duel was the matter of a fate and not the skills.

The red-haired knight was destined to live.

The beast was fated to die.

The fair-haired princess was destined to survive.

To marry the brave warrior who appeared out of nowhere preceded by its fame. The eternal happiness that was to come afterword. Her people cheering his courage and her beauty.

Children’s fairy-tales and she wasn’t a child any more. He was not a knight that should be expected. She was not a princess worth protecting. The kingdom was perhaps the only thing that fitted the story little ones were told by their parents and nannies. The warrior was to live. She was to live. But what else was to happen? Something she couldn't fully comprehend, but Nunnally was sure it would not end here. And by 'HERE' she didn't mean here and now. She meant this world. This life. This universe? Was she scared by that?

She was standing there. Too close to the fight. Too bold. Too proud. Too greedy. There was to much to her to-be-the-princess everyone loved. But she was enough to be a princess that everyone hated. She shivered. From excitement; good that this could have been taken as a tremble of fear. The blood of the beast stained her white dress. Her fair hair. Her pale cheeks. It almost looked as if she was the one bleeding. Many would want that. Many would be happy about it. Nunnally moved her white hand to wipe off the blood from her face. The traces of blood on her palm looked o d d. But perhaps it was the smell of the dragon's blood that really made her feel surprised. She expected the blood will have the smell of d e a t h. But it smelled of l i f e. As if life and death could smell.

And the beast was bleeding. Bleeding out perhaps. Its blood – like an unstoppable stream – came closer and closer to her; to her feet. But even that didn’t make Nunnally move. She was still standing there; looking at the blood now creating a small paddle in front of her; staining her dress crimson. The paddle changed into the small pool that grew larger ad larger and then Nunnally found herself standing in something resembling the lake of blood. Only then she asked herself why she hadn’t moved. But it was too late as the victorious warrior appeared in front of her. The spectators took their breath. Now the champion was to speak.

But it was no fairy-tale. He was not a hero everyone had expected. No! They actually had come here to watch her death. She was not a princess they wanted to be saved. So, also the words were WRONG. But why so much wrong!?

Why did it happen to her?; she managed to think as the last of his words were spoken, and couldn’t have been taken away. She wasn't bad. At least not worse than most. But she wanted what was reserved for men to want. She refused to be a picture girl. A prize. A possession. A WOMAN.

She wanted to be a human instead. A ruler. A king. Not someone's queen, but A KING in her own rights.

So perhaps as expected, he didn’t want her kingdom. He didn’t want her hand (and not even the heart). He wanted…a night with her!

What an insult! Did he take her to be a woman of easy virtue? Perhaps even a cheap harlot?

A slattern?

Nunnally wanted to d i s a p p e a r. To run away and never be seen away. She blinked as if to wake up from a nightmare. But it wasn’t a NIGHTMARE: it was a reality. HER REALITY. And the audience, and the protagonist, were waiting for her reply.

For her humiliation…?

Kill the dragon. Get the girl. Though he seemed not to mean in metaphorically.

She offered him a lovely smile. The one that could melt almost any heart. A smile of a small innocent girl. A smile of a lady. If she had chosen to to be a lady of the smile, she would have been loved. But she would have been dead, too. A decoration and NOT a person.

“Your courage is greater than in the stories being told about you. This land here and its people owe you the eternal gratitude to free us from the Champion of the Black. And so does the princess of this land. I...” – Nunnally offered you him a deep curtsy; one she had offered only to the members of royalty. And also that didn't happen too often – “You certainly deserve all the gold this land may offer you…” – she looked at him; her blue eyes bold (yet desperate) – “You certainly deserve the hand of the princess and the crown, but it will not be offered to you since you already rejected it…” - for my and yours luck.

A princess and a dragon. Kill the dragon, get the girl.

“But…” – she straightened herself – “You’d have to do much more to deserve a night with me.”

“You wish to spend a night with me…”

“…win my heart!” – she took a few steps towards Reid wading in blood; life and death; the girl and the dragon and the knight – “But that’s not an easy task and many had failed.” – Nunnally caressed his cheek, although all she wanted was to hit him – “Are you sure it’s the night with me that you really want?”

“Because that the privilege I would only grant to my husband...”

“Or to my lover.”

“…and…you are…neither…” – she laughed; some could say mockingly – “So far, you’re just a hero.”

“The are many of them…so what makes you so special? That you think you deserve a night with me?” 

@fallesto

[egg-emperor]

Question: Would you believe Eggman would consider the possibility of replacing his vitals with machinery to continue living on into the future, or maybe perhaps downloading his mind into a mech or robobody so that he essentially achieves immortality?

Or would he remain, as that one post put it, childishly narcissistic and simply say 'RIP to everyone else but I'm different' because he thinks he's too good for death?

Personally i think he'd probably remain in denial that he'd die at all, until he's actually at that stage where he knows he's about to and won't let something as inane as death do him in so he fixes up a lil something so he could live longer.

Yeah I imagine Eggman wouldn't even think about it most of the time, he'd just be in subconscious denial that he could die from old age and just think of himself as living forever like children do but he never grows out of as the manchild he is. It's a case where his egotism and childishness works against the logic of science as he refuses to believe that he will, he doesn't deserve it, he's too good for it, he's built different lol. He can't bear to imagine that anything can ever be completely out of his control.

And with all the brushes with death that he has constantly but always survives almost completely unscathed, it makes him feel even more confident, untouchable, and invincible and after all that, he doesn't want to think of time being the one thing that can finally beat him. Very occasionally when he's thinking about the passage of time and aging like on birthdays, he almost has a brief moment of oh fuck time to conquer the world is slipping away but he keeps pushing it down for as long as possible.

During that entire time he'll keep a mindset of "I'm not running out of time to conquer the world, build and rule my empire," "I'm not writing a will because I'm going to be there and I'm not passing the empire down to anyone because it's all mine." He's not planning on dying, so how dare anyone make such ridiculous assumptions and suggestions! XD Does he know exactly how he's going to live forever? No, he has no real logic yet but comforts himself by telling himself he just won't because death is beneath him.

I imagine that he doesn't consider the options of what he can actually do in terms of science and puts it off for a very long while for another reason too. That while doing such would at least still prove his genius in being able to pull it off, he actually values his superior natural body and strength and he wouldn't want mechanical or digital aids to downplay and take away from that and make it seem less impressive in any amount, as it would essentially be replaced by it. If he finds that's the only way he can go about it.

And I do imagine that he'd leave it until last minute to actually do something about it as a result. His determination to never give up on his dream is no joke, there's no retirement as long as the world is still in need of conquering because that would be giving up. He'll just keep fighting and working as hard as he can to the end. Any signs that he's getting too old, he'll push through no matter the strain on him, when the truth starts to seep in he'll keep trying to ignore it and deny and refuse it as hard as he can.

I can imagine that he'd be on his very last legs when it really hits him that if he wants to live forever, he has to finally do something to ensure that and he accepts it and gets to work. His intelligent mind will still be going strong no matter how old and he'll be able to use it to go about extending his lifespan and hopefully immortalizing himself. It would be his very last resort to alter himself and that he'd want to keep it as faithful to his already perfect self and appearance as he can but he'd explore all of his options.

He could go about that by downloading his data into a program or a robot or some other secret to immortality he ends up discovering. If he somehow found a way to turn himself/store his mind in a robot, I'm sure he'd keep his handsome likeness that he clearly adores so much and all of his admirable abilities of intelligence and strength! Though he may add some cool bonus enhancements here and there to show off. I could imagine him looking a lot like the unused Metal Eggman in Runners if he is robotic.

And whatever way he ends up going about it, I bet he'd be sure to boast about how he found the trick to immortality and managed to apply it to himself as a human in the ways Gerald never got to try with Maria. He'd use it as yet another reason to say that he's superior to the both of them, as the undeniable proof. He wasn't kidding when he said he was built different, as it would be thanks to his genius. He's never going to die like them, he'll always be the best living scientist and emperor of the world forever and ever hehe! >:)

[tokuteasings]

I see your requests are open and I adore your King Ohger writing!!! Could you write something with Gira and hes trying to act all tough bc hes the “evil king” and you’re just like, humoring him because hes so into and after a lil but he breaks characters and it just get super fluffy? Idk if thats a coherent plot but you write him so well! Have a nice week 💚

you cant just come into my inbox and give me fluffy gira thots without warning how dare-

Thank you for your praise~! Kingohger has such a fucking grip on me yall dont even know-

Warnings: GN!Reader, fluffy. Make-out sesh

What is a king to a deity?

There is a howl of pride, of a beast leering towards the masses at their crowning achievement. He's the lion at the head of the pride, the master, the, apex, the alpha, dearest Gira is the king of evil and he wears it with pride.

Let all kneel before him - as you have, over and over again.

Let all worship him - as you have, over and over again.

Let all adore him, as you have, over and over again.

Gladly.

Without question.

He's laughing again, jovially, as he chases around the children and swings about this small little branch (he always picks the tiniest little sticks and gives the best ones to the kids that flock to the two of you) and screams, "For I am the king of evil, Gira! I shall rule the land-!" he glances around, the idea blooming into his head as a stag beetle to a flame and they lock on to yours.

They glitter in the sunlit day, mischief dancing within them as he sets the "sword" at his side and makes the fastest beeline towards you (you have seen faster, such as when he saw you again after a long period of this touchless entity that dragged on for eons and swept you up into his arms and kissed you breathless) before cackling and gathering you into his arms with frightening strength.

The branch is held to your neck, a sole leaf (still attached, still clinging despite the force) tickles your skin - a kiss dotting it akin to his own. You laugh and dramatically gasp, the back of your hand against your forehead as you press yourself towards Gira's chest and smirk at how he yelps and flushes just a wee bit.

Because you're at his heart, where you have crawled in and kept it captive for so long. Especially when a hand skitters against his chest and collar bone, pads of your fingers dusting against his bare skin that makes him keel and whine - pecks from other parts of your skin.

"Oh no~!" you whimper as the children gather around you, brandishing their blades of terra and bark. "The evil king has me captive!" you let out a "whimper" as Gira clears his throat, his arm now possessively wrapped around your waist as you inwardly giggle. "Whatever will I do?!"

"That is right!" Gira calls out to the kids, using the sword that was against your neck earlier to point at each of them, taunting them. "I have captured this citizen! I shall force them into a marriage and we shall conquer the world together!"

You stare up at him with wide eyes as the kids gasp and groan out various quips of: "Ew marriage!" "That's mean!"

The word "marriage" echoes in your head because honestly...have you thought about it? Yes, a few here and there. Sometimes in the middle of the night, you and Gira talk about what the future holds and could bring. But he would always smile and kiss your fingers, "Whatever it brings us, we'll conquer it together." and a smile that outshines even the sun would bloom upon his face and make you utterly weak in the knees.

It's just like now, now that you think about it.

His hues are reflecting yours and the images of the children, but he is the sun itself. He is showing off this light that you are attracted to, crave even.

So you do what you normally do whenever you're overwhelmed by love and adoration for your little king-

You just kiss him. You grab the sides of his face and planet your lips on to his, not caring for the meager populace that gazes upon this communion of king and captive. They fade.

Gira lets out a small yelp, his sword loses its place in his hands and they're around your hips now. He tilts his head to further press his lips into yours, dipping you lightly and despite his initial hesitation before, he melts into it. He's craving it as much as you do-

"Ew! They're kissing!"

"Oh my God!"

"Gira nii-chan!"

There is a sputter of flubbers and blubbers as you two part, your faces equally red as his. Kogane from the sidelines rolls her eyes as Gira clears his throat. "R-Right..." he mumbles out, before turning to you and pecking your cheek as an apology. "Sorry got carried away." he's sheepish at this point, a small timid smile to his lips-

"We should do it again."

Gira stares outright at your words, a small mumble leaving his lips that you couldn't hear but he's fully red now - his blush skittering on downwards towards his chest from his open shirt. "N-Not now!" he gestures towards the kids with an empty hand. "D-Don't do this in public!" it's an embarrassed hiss, he's almost trying to make himself smaller and smaller. He doesn't need the feel of your lips that are wine and honey and everything nice in the world.

He doesn't need it to fog his mind until he's in this drunken stupor...

"You're right. Sorry." your laugh softly before picking up his branch and handing it back to him. He smiles as his hand brushes against yours with the passing of blade to blade-

Your lips zoom towards his knuckles and he yelps, jumping backwards and dropping the blade again as the kids groan further. You laugh as you pick up the fallen branch, raising it high and ego fueling your id. "Aha! I have usurped the evil emperor! Now all shall bow before me!"

And if he could, he would happily get on his knees for you.

For love is a sacrament best taken kneeling for a god you devote everything towards.

[thyhatredflowstrue]

Hi I'm here I'm pissed tf off and I wanna call out an ex-friend of mine for some fucking insane misinfo and being a lil bitch abt it

Fucking this.

don't fucking use the bible as the source it's so intensely biased constantly and it's also largely not factually true !

no. no. none of this. All of this is pro-israel propaganda! It's not that palestine has been rejecting every offer, it's that every offer has been 'you don't get freedom or rights but we'll stop bombing you!'

Palestine has been there long before israel ever existed. Palestine has had not israeli people living there since fucking BCE.

It was first settled by the arabic people(At one point it was mainly controlled by Egypt). It was first taken by the two kingdoms of Israel and Judah(during the iron age), then by the Assyrians in 8th Century BCE, then by the Babylonians in c. 601 BCE, then by the Persians in 539 BCE, and then got hit by Alexander The Great in the late 330s BCE, then the the Hasmonean Kingdom in 2nd Century BCE, though that one got annexed by Rome in 63 BCE, and had much of everything religious there destroyed in roughly 70 BCE, and then from 636–641 went through a long line of different people controlling it, all still not israel. Hell, the Kingdom Of Jerusalem wasn't even established until 1099 by the crusaders, it was re-conquered by Ayyubid Sultanate in 1187, only to be invaded by the Mongol Empire and have the Egyptian Mamluks reunify palestine under their control in the 1250s. And then it got conquered again by the Ottoman Empire in 1516 and they ruled it well into the 20th century. It was captured from them by the british government during WWI to establish it as a homeland for the jewish people, which even then was heavily protested as the Arabic people living there didn't want their home designated to someone else. The UN General Assembly recommended partitioning Palestine into two states: Arab and Jewish. However, the situation deteriorated into a civil war because the Arabic people, once again, did not want to have to give up their home and land to outsiders. The independent state of Israel came to be anyways in 1948. Nearby Arab countries invaded Palestine, and Israel not only prevailed, but conquered more territory than envisioned by the Partition Plan. During the war, 700,000, or about 80% of all Palestinians fled or were driven out of territory Israel conquered and were not allowed to return, an event known as the Nakba ("Catastrophe") to Palestinians. (Fun fact, in Israel you are not allowed to talk about the Nakba. They are silencing this part of their history.) Starting in the late 1940s and continuing for decades, about 850,000 Jews from the Arab world immigrated ("made Aliyah") to Israel. After the war, only two parts of Palestine remained in Arab control: the West Bank (and East-Jerusalem), annexed by Jordan, and the Gaza Strip occupied by Egypt, which were conquered by Israel during the Six-Day War in 1967. Despite international objections, Israel started to establish settlements in these occupied territories. Israel are the settlers here and are the ones committing literal war crimes, as recently confirmed by the ICJ itself.

And yes, I'm petty enough to tag you in this because seeing the ICJ confirm today has been enough to remind me of all this and really piss me off. I want you to see this. I want you to read this and admit you were wrong and letting biased propaganda into your server. @coffeecreamer-and-chillvibes

[autobot-ratchet]

Drift Miniseries and Spotlight: Drift

this is usually where I would put all the Drift-related one shots and miniseries when I would reread this series so that's where I'll put them this time too, it's Drift time, let's go

Drift 1

I'm so fond of Deadlock, lil edgelord man <3

even back then, Deadlock was doing everything he could to make things better. Granted, he was very misguided, but he never committed all this violence simply because he loves the power or whatever, if that was the case, he would've been a part of the DJD with the kind of determination he's got. But he wasn't because that's not what it was about. All that killing was for the sake of getting the war over with as quickly as possible because he really did believe that fully eliminating all threats was what needed to be done in order to make Cybertron the best it could be

eyyy what's up Wing

that's whatcha get for trying to bail, Drift, get smushed

damn they really changed Drift's entire appearance while he was out

Drift 2

I do like Drift being confronted with a Cybertronian city that embodies everything he's fighting for, but it was made specifically by those who refused to fight, making him start to question if all the fighting and killing he's been doing was truly necessary the way he always thought it was

also love Wing using violence to get through to Drift, it's a language he understands, and in the meantime he can learn some better ways of communicating

“I didn't join to conquer anything” hell YES!!! LOVE this confirmation that it was never about the violence in and of itself for Drift, it was always just a means to an end. Sure, he was always good at killing and always so, so angry, but that anger was never the point, the point was to eliminate the things that made him so angry in the first place, and for him, for the kind of life he was forced to live, violence was the only way to both survive and fix things. How was he supposed to avoid becoming Deadlock when cops were brutalizing people like him for fun and the ones who had the power to make life livable for people like him simply didn't care? Like sure he can make the choice to stop fighting now, now that he's got a support system, but back in Rodion? If he hadn't fought, he Would Have Died, full stop, and I don't think it's very fair to be like “but violence bad tho, don't ever do it”

I've said it before but man... the Decepticon movement started out so good........ shame it got all fucked

Drift 3

aww, Drift trying to do the right thing, good for you hon

I do find it very interesting that Megatron's playing favorites with Deadlock here. Man I wish they had gotten to speak more once Drift got back to the Lost Light, but I fully understand why they couldn't, we had to cut off this run to make room for the next one

this is another case of “I totally understand and can't fully blame anyone for their opinions here,” of course Dai Atlas doesn't want to risk losing Crystal City to another war, but also sometimes you have no choice but to fight

baby boy gets two whole makeovers in this miniseries

Drift 4

the concept of great swords is so cool, love these stupid fuckin anime weapons

aww man, that parallel between Wing's death and Gasket's death... and Drift getting just as wildly angry for both of them

hell yeah, Dai Atlas, fuck em up

man... it breaks my heart seeing Drift be accepted by the Circle of Light, knowing that they all fuckin die before Drift can see them again. At least he finally solidifies his community on the Lost Light...

baby gets THREE makeovers in this miniseries, good for him

Spotlight: Drift

aww, Drift putting on the same disguise Wing did...

fgdhjsk love Drift trying to be sneaky and then the Wreckers are just like “nah”

still love Perceptor immediately walking up to Drift like “wow you're gorgeous- I mean cool upgrades”

also love how Drift really does just. Accidentally become a Wrecker and thus an Autobot, granted he makes the choice later, but initially it is definitely a spur-of-the-moment thing

damn, rip Percy. I mean I know you're not dead but ouch

aww I like that Kup is willing to give Drift a chance, even knowing full well what he's done and who he used to be

I also love Drift doing his best to save Perceptor. I've seen people say it a lot and I kinda agree, I do wish MTMTE had more moments between Perceptor and Drift. I get why there weren't, especially after having it all so fresh in my mind, there just wasn't any time/reason to put it in, but yknow. Just a couple little background moments would've been nice. Alas

and that's how baby became an Autobot, mostly out of gratitude to Kup for reaching out to him. God he wants to belong to a community so fucking bad, but he doesn't want it to be the wrong one, he doesn't want to make the same mistakes again

[spiderh0rse]

stark's mind noted part 2, e6-10

e6

telling the story of how the rescas happened to that guy he found. the scientist does Not seem enthused

stark seems happy to have had someone to talk to

thinks he's probably trapped in the building, but wants to think optimistically

remembered that he saw some hot water pipes earlier, somehow? Why is this something that sticks with him so easily

"okay valve, let's work your magic. I don't want to be here too long." ...hl3 when

wondering how the situation will be resolved. Thinks they can all be rescued but otherwise concerned about the teleportation issue

Doesn't seem to think too highly of the military. Understands they tend to conquer people they fight against

"that's what you GET you,,, asshole! serves. you right" so awkward so silly

does try to talk to a vortigaunt. maybe because it was bipedal? I'd assume bipeds to be more intelligent than quadrapeds

talking to the dead and doesn't know why he's doing it

so annoyed a door isn't opening for him.

playin a lil risky, Vin,,,

thinks the weird sewer pipe would be completed (neg) with some alligators

calls himself a "blind motherfucker" with some interesting inflections. I like the inflections theyre just novel. Point is his eyes are bad without the glasses

"i could drown myself! I feel like doing that, I don't feel like living anymore" DUDE

"fucking a" I have heard this expression from maybe three people and i love it

thanks the water for helping him and curses it for almost drowning him

makes two references back to back and then admits the contexts of both are different

calls himself a natural and laughs when he hits a small target at an awkward angle.

then promptly worries about why he's laughing when he's killing things

thinks hes on some sort of mental breakdown. Briefly jokes about being insane all along and decides he should not be joking about that right now

overhypes some button

vent sharks,, he does not want to fight them. Taking gasping breaths in the vent

breaks SOME bone falling. Not his some body he lands on

wants to use the security room equipment to contact someone but knows it won't work

"if reality had a face i'd kick it in the fucking dick" mood

starts yelling NO TOUCHING at the headcrabs

"this is where I get off" sick half life reference brooooo

bad balance landing on a forklift

calls the aliens rude. Realizes this is a bit silly of him

e7

wants a grappling hook. Where have I heard this before...

displeased at having to scale some pipes

keeps laughing as he has to risk his life again

mosey on in...

doesn't want to be in a confined space rn. Vent sharks, building may come down on him...

endless catwalks... beneath the wheel...

shoots a SNOT MONSTER. "From earth, with love"

the water down in the canal looks disgusting. It IS bad.

didn't even CHECK how deep the water was. There are reasons you make sure it's not too shallow

hopeful that people will survive the incident

keeps blaming himself for the whole issue. Wants to avert others deaths because it's His fault

concerned for environmental safety

"tempt not a desperate man" fancy motherfucker <3

momentarily considers jumping into the pit

NOT enthused about jumping across a bunch of boxes

insists he's a survivor insists he's okay

I am getting the idea that he's afraid of heights, chat

gets his feet on solid ground and feels like he's alright now

"up is right! yes! but then left would be. down"

FANCY ASS. HEART EMOJI

once again makes an uneasy noise at the idea of falling to his death

considers himself alarmingly exceptional at shooting a gun

so relived to find an elevator. Sounds deranged with relief. Evil laugh soundin kind of laugh

e8

finishes laughing. He's so happy everyones gonna be SAVED

once made a joke about the ceiling eating people

I'd call it Sisyphean, myself

convenient squared :>

stark reasons going to the surface is the logical choice here. Staying put when teleporting aliens are around is fooling

thinks inaction won't work here. Tries to convince someone to escape with him

oh hey that's the EAS! I figured out what I was before Stark diddddd

half human half alien,,, "halien..."

doesn't hesitate to tell someone that his buddy is Dead from headcrab

"I didn't mean to bring you into this world . . . into taking you out of it" world's worst dad

thinks he can keep someone safe

thinks the magnum has insane recoil

Clint Eastwood movies are Not good prep for gun use dude

thinks himself somewhat large and heavy, especially in the suit. Or too large for the vents at least

SO confused at the turrets in Black Mesa shooting at Anyone. A bit hysterical.

questions black mesas choice to install indiscriminately targeting turrets. Wonders if black mesa is Evil

e9

hyperventilating

turret guns gun gun bullets bullets are bad

actually hoping for a vent

feels like he's experiencing He Knows He's Going To Die and invites a guard to experience that too

derides conspiracy theorists

knows the specific term "high-impact reactive armour". HEV suit nerd

lays out the game plan of Save Everyone to the couple guards

plays up his gunplay to the guards

FELIX FREEMAN MENTION <3

Office Complex is where Felix works!

didn't even eat breakfast :(

remembers that the first guard was into trophy hunting

calls someone ma'am. Polite fellow.

dumbfounded at some guy refusing aid

apologizes for being a little rude

wagers the elevators will kill them

incredibly fucking bothered by dead guards and fusses over the single survivor

wonders why no one has Keys

asks the survivors to not mind the effects stress has had on him

e10

wonders if it's too late to get some snacks from the cafeteria. decides to not on account of it would be awkward

he's pretty sure the headcrabs don't have eyes

the freezer is NOTABLY cold

he wishes he knew how to do a pull-up

he does NOT fancy all these interruptions he's getting tonight

he has a cat! Mr. Whiskers! Considers any animal with that name objectively cute.

stacks boxes instead of doing the freezer puzzle

doesn't like spiders. They're Fast and he Hates them and insects.

not one for entymology. Boooooo loser love bugs or die by my stinger

not happy with reality trying to kill him

considers reality very efficient at killing people

knew someone named Nathan who died from getting too angry

"I concur. -_-"

goes back to the cafeteria,, does not get food

checks the staircase for turrets

Colleague.

making some manner of displeased expression

sososo scared of jumping into that ladder

yeah he's totally afraid of heights

hopes the ladder won't break apart

witnesses a death and promptly looks away from the scene, tells himself there was nothing he could've done

comforts himself with the idea the dead man only fell to his death and didnt have to experience a more painful death.

[starlightshadowsworld]

Bendy and the dark revival part 4

Thonks

And Joey's in the thumbnail.

Oh boy.

.

Insert giant fuck you ink spider thingy.

I hate this...so much.

.

Fear shows your true nature

Yeah it shows your a basic bitch with a god complex.

... The fact this could be applied to multiple people in this series says a lot.

.

Alice!

Audery where are you

Looks at the corpses of spider ink things... You don't wanna know.

Yay Alice is coming.

Dunno how she got where we were with the description of "It's dark" but she's smart.

.

Ahhh!!! Baby bendy is back.

Poor lil guy he looks scared.

I won't hurt you bud I'm not Wilson.

... And he ran off :(

.

... And Joey's... Ghost is here?

What is happening right now?

I believe there's something special in all of us.

Why I think we can even conquer death itself

Especially you Audery

Nevermind I thought I had the line but nope.

Who are you?

Audery I get it's been a long long day but... He's been mentioned literally everywhere and you know, he's your boss. Or old boss now.

Don't you know me? Take a good look.

Ghost Joey and his magical lantern.

Joey drew in the flesh, well so to speak.

Ghost!

Come on up, let's take a look. There's something I wanna show you.

Remember when Alice told us not to move...

But sure no let's go follow the ghost of capitalism himself.

It's a cycle Audery. An ink stained nightmare forever stuck on repeat.

The cycle... The time loop?

The loop Henry is stuck in... We're in that loop here 2?

With just a pencil and a dream and a little help from the Gent Corporation, it came to being.

From what I gather it exists in parallel to the outside world. Completely removed from the match of time.

And like a record, it played over and over again.

So when Wilson had us put the items on the altars?

We got pulled into this parallel world stuck on a loop?

Man fuck that guy.

It's begun to crumble, wear down.

This studio is a monument to choosing the wrong road.

You were always pushing me, pushing me to do the right thing.

You should've pushed a little harder.

Now whether it was built for revenge or regret, I don't know. That's my riddle to solve.

I think it's a bit of both.

... So not everything here was created by Joey. Or more accurately weren't created by those in his studio.

The worst ones call themselves keepers, dangerous deadly folks.

Can't be worse than Wilson.

Trying to bring what they call order into this world.

... Wait is Wilson a keeper?

Freezing the cycle in place! Changing the script.

... Like saying the ink demon is dead when he's not.

Look, above all never forget your here for a reason Audery.

Damn you minimum wage job and your creepy keeper janitors.

Because I'm not the man, I'm just the memory.

Am I sympathising with Joey Drew?

Huh.

... And his grave is here...with candles and a bendy plushi... Okay than.

Same dates 1901-1971 and just a pencil and a dream on the wall.

.

Baby bendy!

And he ran off again...is it cos of us?

.

Lord Amok rules

No idea what that means... But the skull spider isn't comforting.

.

So they really did try and link a Gent Corporation building to the studio.

.

Giant skull spider drawn on the wall

... Nope... Nope.

.

Within our isolated walls, Lord Amok reigns. The drip drops of the leaking world above cannot stop his rule.

Those who oppose Amok's hand have their bodies crushed and fed into narrow pipes that lead into forgotten sewers under our feet.

Those tunnels are even deeper, their even darker than this one. There is only suffering down there.

But should anyone defeat Lord Amok, cast him fiwn into our small kingdom will belong to the conquerer. This is the secret of Amok's immortality.

Pass on the throne pass on the name.

... What... Who is this Lord Amok?

Is is the fuck you spider eye ink thingy? Is that why the skull spider is drawn everywhere?

Is it Wilson?

What is happening? Why is there another cult down here???

Love how Lord Amok works by Spartacus rules.

.

... Nevermind found him.

On a lil throne 2 how fancy.

Doesn't even say hi and tries to kill me, what an ass.

Hes got spider legs coming out his head... Looks like Hela's head thing in Thor Ragnarok.

All hail the new Amok

So... Audrey's the new Lord Amok now, that's cool.

Quite the succession stategy.

🤣.... What is happening...

Is she gonna get the spider legs in the head thing?

.

I see your mind as the truth unfolds

Hey ink demon.

Is my mind confused? Cos it's confused.

You will accept your fate before the end.

Well apparently there is no end and I already accepted working minimum wage for a company that charges $15 for it's coffee sooo...

Can't be worse than that.

Unless my fate involves Wilson in any way.

Than fuck that.

.

A city built on broken dreams

Woah...

I thought this world was just the studio but apparently not.

There's a whole city here?

How big is this place?

Your saying what im thinking Audery.

Oh hey Baby Bendy.

Awh he has a lil sleeping hat.

Where did you come from?

I'm guessing the ink, unless you mean right now than idk.

Look, I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to hurt you. And I really don't think you want to hurt me either, right?

He's just rubbing his lil eyes, aww sleepy guy.

Baby bendy shakes head.

Aww

Good, let's be friends than. What do you say, you and me?

Oml yess I wanna befriend the baby.

Awesome

Whoop!

Ohh he don't like the sound of the Gent building.

... Same honestly.

Achievement noise, Baby Bendy has joined your party.

And here starts chapter 4, Factory of horrors

.... Lovely.

.

Man there really is a city... And Wilson just.. Controls all of this?

.. Looks pretty empty, and there's a crashed car.

.

It's kind of creepy in here

Truest thing I've ever heard Audery.

Looks at Boris plushi on the chair 👀 stop itttt

.

And ghost Joey is back.

You haven't gotten far

Well jeez Joey, I'm not one of your workers you can annoy into working harder.

... Well not anymore.

How did you get in here

... He's a ghost Audery.

I see you have your father's, never quit, go-getter spirit.

Her father?

Oh now you know my father?well newsflash! I didn't even know my father...or my mother... or any of my family.

Awh hun.

So her father worked here too?? If that's how Joey knows hin.

Please god tell me he isn't Wilson.

You've chosen to forget the past.

You can't forget what you don't know Joey.

I can understand that.

Says the ghost of a man's memories.

There's something I wanna show you.

... Get back Joseph!

Alright Joey I'm here

... Henry?!

Let's see if we can find what you wanted me to see.

... Are we replaying the end of the last game??? Cos he said that than.

But... No we weren't here.

This won't take long.

The 425(?)loops say otherwise.. pal.

And back to Audery we go still in the old studio(?)

There's a little story you need to here.

Oo boy what now.

Once upon a time, Audery. There was a bitter old man.

And shocker it was Joey.

Who had lost just about everything. The real Joey Drew.

Called it!

He blamed everyone but himself for his mistakes. But mostly he blamed his old buisness partner for abandoning their work years and years ago.

Never thought ghost Joey would be this introspective.

But than. He's got nothing but time.

A man by the name of Henry Stein. A great artist and a good friend.

Which you stuck him in a time loop for.

In his anger, Joey used an evil machine to create another world.

A world made of paper and ink. Where he'd torment his own version of Henry forevermore.

Yup, 425 loops...and God knows how much by now.

But one day a miracle happened.

An angel came into Joey's life.

Susie or Allison?

A young woman by the name of Allison Pendal. She didn't visit often, but when she did. She saw something good in Joey, no one else could.

Including himself.

... So you trapped her in here 2?

Through their friendship. He began to see the world with better eyes.

So one day in his cartoon cycle of hatred. He gave Henry an angel of his own.

To guide him when things were dark. To always provide hope.

... And that's why Allison is the one to help him.

And Audery.

It's honestly sweet that Joey saw someone who made such a positive impact on his life and wanted Henry to have that too.

Showing he did care for him and realised his mistakes.

... Granted Henry was still trapped so there's that but giving him a light in the darkness was pretty good of Joey.

It was than, Joey decided to make something new.

Please not an animatronic.

Something he had always wanted, but could never have:

A family.

But not a cartoon one.

Something real. And after many many tries, he made something that made him happier than he ever could have imagined.

A wonderful loving daughter.

... Oh...

Bright and kind.

Almost human.

He created you Audery.

.

.

... So Joey, Joey is Audery's father.

I'm flesh and blood

No offence hun but you are covered in ink.

And absorbing it.

... So.. Audery Drew...

Ghost Joey said real, so by that I guess he meant with the ink machine?

Child of darkness...

Just because we're born in darkness doesn't mean we belong to it. We're always free to choose.

Okay, kingdom hearts.

Don't blame her tho, this is insane.

... But did Archgate know this??? Did Nathan? .. I mean, hiring your dead friends child is something.

.

Attention children of the machine

Fuck off Wilson!

And wheres Baby Bendy??

The feeble uprising in Lost Harbour has been ended by the keepers.

Oh boy.... But that means there's possible allies.

We are safe once again from the treason of the Cyclebreakers.

Fitting, in every sense of the word.

The keepers are watching.

Okay, big brother. Also confirmation he's a Keeper.

Didn't they want to break the cycle? Well freeze and destroy it?? Idk.

I'll never claim to understand Wilson.

In more important news, where's Baby Bendy?

.

Aaand the ink demons here... Great.

And Audery can't move.

.... Oh...

The ink demon and Baby Bendy are the same.

I know that shouldn't be surprising but... Damn.

Wonder if coming here set him off, he didn't want to come here.

.

Archie carter tape talking about how Gent Corp was asking for research subjects, how death here is like a way of life.

So they didn't stop at employees.

.

Wait Wilson created the Keepers? He isn't just one, he created one?

Can you take me to him?

..do we have too can we just...not?

Man I'd they deem us dangerous they'd have had a field day with Susie Alice.

Toxic fumes activated

Still better than seeing Wilson.

Was gonna question how they'd get toxic fumes here... But it's what the 70's?Couldn't have been hard to find.

Thought they'd have pumped em thro the vent... But apparently not? That was stupid.

But I'm not giving em tips on how to effectively kill us.

[whatareudoinginmyhouse]

(Ok so I've been comparing Lil' Bits and Commander Peepers together for a bit in my head and this has been sitting in my brain for a little while)

Like I've just been thinking about what if Commander Peepers just simply used his cuteness/smallness to his advantage like Lil' Bits? Because if you think about it he'd probably be more successful that way.

Like think about it Lil' Bits and Peepers are both considered cute and not intimidating in the WOY universe.

And Lil' Bits unlike Peepers is a respected (or at least I assume she's respected cuz lord Hater hired her) bounty hunter and probably quite successful at what she does. Considering she hypnotizes people with her cuteness so she can make them do whatever she pretty much tells them too. She could pretty much walk them into the hands of whoever issued the bounty on them and they wouldn't suspect a thing, cuz to them Lil' Bits is just a cute innocent looking kitten.

Now take Peepers on the other hand who sees himself being cute/small and unintimidating as a weakness, and he's even insecure about it.

So to compensate he tries to make himself seem more intimidating but, to no avail. Which is why he uses Hater when he conquers planets, because Hater brings the intimidation factor. And without Hater Peepers wouldn't be taken seriously because without Hater he's just some small watchdog trying to intimidate people into handing over their planet. Which would in theory never work.

So if Peepers DID use his cuteness to his advantage (which he'd probably never do) I'd think he'd be more successful and could probably make it as a solo villain.

Think about it.

You wouldn't suspect a small innocent looking watchdog, to conquer your planet even after they've publicly announced that they are. And soon enough you have an entire fucking war ship crashing down on your planet, with thousands of soldiers coming out of it. And before you were even able to realize what had happened BOOM your planet's already conquered.

In short he'd let peoples guards down kinda sorta