#let's just blame it on schizophrenic tendencies towards rambling and repeating myself

[papercranesandpride]

Hey, any other aplatonics out there who are extremely social? I feel like whenever I look at aplatonic stuff it's always people talking about how they want having few friends and being alone most of the time to be normalized and accepted. I agree! I have been that person, and discovered that not having friends didn't actually make me feel like I needed any, and that is a lot of how I realized I was aplatonic. These days, though, I'm socializing so much. Weirdly, I don't feel isolated or unrepresented even seeing that from everyone in the community? But I still feel like I should see if anyone else like me is out there.

That said, I get along really well with people and I love socializing. I do not feel like we need to be friends, but I adore interacting with people I do theater with, people I do orchestra/choir with, patients, family, mutuals on here, people in chatrooms, my coworkers who aren't shitty, and yes, friends. I've discovered that I'm apparently charismatic. I am likeable. If I enter a space, a lot of people will just automatically like me. It's something about my vibe. Granted, there's also something about my vibe that will make a certain type of person absolutely loathe me and find that everything about me rubs them the wrong way. But that's not most people. For most people, I've somehow found a way to be the adult equivalent of a teacher's pet.

I'm outgoing. I like to talk. I like to hear other people talk. I like to make connections with people, even if they don't quite hit that secret platonic level. But also sometimes they do and I stumble into that and it's fine too. I have friends as means to the end of socializing. I have friends who I can get in a room with and they will listen to me talk and talk back. I don't have friends because I like who they are as people, but because I like the way they interact with me and enable me to talk about my things or to just feel a vibe I like when I'm in a group with them. I like group gathering more as a place and an environment than for the people in them. It's really nice socializing now that I know I'm apl, because I know exactly what I want out of it. I don't need someone who will text me about things, but I do want people who will invite me to their parties. I have a person who I mostly just like exchanging music with. People who I like for writing ideas. That kind of thing.

It is interesting knowing that most people's definition of a friend is just "a person I like," because it means that a lot of these people see me as friends but I don't necessarily see them that way back. Someone I've hung out in a chatroom with for 8 years but never really talk to one on one isn't a friend. Someone I do a hobby with isn't a friend. A mutual isn't a friend. But I do really like those people and in some ways that makes socializing with them better. They aren't friends, they are people who I like and are there and listen.

Anyway. Just figured I'd see if there are any other extremely social aplatonics.