#let them carry on about Harry and Taylor actually sharing the same space and not being rude to each other especially if it continues to prod

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Mon 15 March ‘21

FIRST TIME GRAMMY AWARD WINNING ARTIST HARRY STYLES!! From the bottom of the stairs to the top of the fucking world baby, get itttt!! He won Best Pop Solo Performance for smash hit Watermelon Sugar-- the other two categories he was up for went to others but he was a dark horse for any of them so getting one is awesome! Yeah the grammys are shit but I’m so happy for him to see him receiving validation and acclaim from the industry that has never appreciated what he (and his bandmates) are and can do as artists, it’s a fucking start you know? We can enjoy the moment! Harry did! His acceptance speech was short and it feels like he was blindsided and forgot everything (including not to swear on TV and as pro as he is you know that means he was absolutely reeling, I love that) but later he said “I want to thank my fans for giving me an environment to be free to make the music that I want to make and supporting me along the way the last ten years”, yes that’s right we have helped you find a place to feel good, and “this is an incredibly sweet icing on the cake of what I get to do everyday so thank you.”

But that’s not all! He also performed, and wore things! Say what you want about Harry (or better yet please DON’T at least to me but that’s a losing battle) we always get so hyped up about even just seeing his outfits and he does not let us down! BLACK LEATHER, TITS FULLY OUT, DICK BANANA CHARM, AND A MUPPET BOA? Yeah he did that! Shirtless under a patent leather suit, I mean: wow. Very glam rock, very… well listen it’s just very GAY in like so many different ways??? Harry Lambert said they wanted “something darker, sexier, and more unexpected” which is definitely about that look I’m assuming and not the pastel thrift store rummage bin hodgepodge he wore later, unless Harry(s) and I have very different ways of interpreting “darker”. (Harry L also said “free the nipple” and we can all see that he MEANT it.) Harry red carpet-ed and accepted his award in a lavender muppet boa, tits slightly less out but still cleavagey, and with a seemingly random collection of other garments YES BABY OKAY you just WEAR THAT THEN! About that Harry L said, “we wanted to do something that felt British and eccentric, a little bit rock ‘n’ roll and a little bit camp,” but the people have spoken and they said ‘we think he looked like Cher from Clueless’ so, sorry Harry(s)! Esquire struggling to describe the look-- “the kind of thing that Styles seems to make wearable” klasjdlk the doubtful ‘seems’ is sending me. Either way we can definitely all agree on the camp part, and that the matching face mask (as seen in the audience shots and in adorbs pics of him camping it up with Lizzo backstage) is amazing, love that (even if he does spend way too much time nervously pulling it on and off omg just LEAVE IT) and it even went also with outfit number THREE (or at least it did as well as any of his anything went together lol) which was a big floppy orange coat and plaid pants and a THIRD BOA, a dignified (haha JK NOPE it’s still a muppet) black number this time.

It seems the performance was filmed in advance rather than done live-- there were clues suggesting this might be the case, but the real giveaway was when a picture from it leaked before the broadcast, lol. Way to make it so we “can’t even tell if it’s live or not” Ben, and why is he STILL so obsessed with trying to gaslight us anyway my god just say what’s prerecorded it’s fiiiine. ANYWAY Harry played Watermelon Sugar and only WS; well after all it is his GRAMMY AWARD WINNING SONG. Plus it was a really nice version, all smooth and funky, with a highlight of the night being Harry’s full on 60s girl group choreo move with the backup singers, omg. Those backing vocalists were the duo G.A.W.D., and there was extra accompaniment by fellow nominee Devonte Hynes aka Blood Orange (who also directed the performance and no I do not know what that means) and “Spencer and Josh” on horns (the closest I can find to someone crediting them so, apologies guys). Anyway! All of them (regular HS band included) were decked out in matching gucci black leather too and looking good. And Harry looked so happy to be up there performing, just beaming like a lighthouse, so overall- good good stuff, I just keep on dancin!

The real bombshell of the performance though was subtle and needed confirmation after for the excitement to really hit-- it was Sarah drumming  decked out in tight black leather and visibly pregnant!! That’s right, band drummer Sarah Jones is PREGNANT by (Grammy Award winning) guitarist Mitch, there’s a HARRY STYLES BAND BABY on the way!!!! WHAT A NIGHT! It wasn’t enough for Harry to find love in his own band, he’s somehow cupid-ing that energy all over the place and spreading it around, AMAZING!

And Liam comes through with not just a sweet congratulations for Harry (“what a huge moment, proud to be your brother” awwww) but also the final word on the performance look- goddammit it IS one of the rejected Best Song Ever video looks, LMAOOOO. But did he tag HSHQ instead of Harry directly in acknowledgment of how the awards system really works and that they are all to be congratulated or simply because it was easier? We will never know.

Additional tidbits-- bassist Hynes was apparently playing creative director Molly Hawkins’ dad’s bass- did we know her dad was a famous bassist who played with Fleetwood Mac and many other 70s stars?! If I did I had definitely forgotten! And more Molly news-- she’s also pregnant!! Harry will soon be surrounded by quarantine babies, dreams really coming true huh? Harry posted a pic of himself with Mitch and Devonte looking very cooool, we saw the ceramic watermelons label execs were sent for the WS release last year, and Rebecca Ferguson who knows 1D from way back when (and has recently drawn attention for talking frankly about how fucked up the industry is and about having seen unnamed boy band members literally slammed against the wall by their management) congratulated Harry and posted a couple of baby pop star Harry pics, cuuuute. Louis’ merch handlers, in response to no complaints whatsoever, sent out emails apologizing. They say they’ve run out of lanyards which were meant to be sent out so they will “be adding a freebie which we know you’ll enjoy” to affected customers’ orders. That is sucky about the lanyards but that’s customer care! Niall posted about his cool bright limited edition merch to remind that it will be gone gone gone tonight and also shared a pretty and touching picture from a the large anti violence rally held in London to protest the killing of Sarah Everard today. And finally some good advice from Bebe Rexha, loved by larries; she says she loves us right back but please don’t kill anyone for not streaming her new song! Yes good plan.

[linernotesandseasons]

HISS GOLDEN MESSENGER   /   Quietly Blowing It

June 25, 2021

PREORDER!

TRACKLIST:

1. Way Back in the Way Back 2. The Great Mystifier 3. Mighty Dollar 4. Quietly Blowing It 5. It Will If We Let It 6. Hardlytown 7. If It Comes in the Morning 8. Glory Strums (Loneliness of the Long-Distance Runner) 9. Painting Houses 10. Angels in the Headlights 11. Sanctuary 

“In August we carried the old horsehair mattress

To the back porch

And slept with our children in a row.

The wind came up the mountain into the orchard

Telling me something; 

Saying something urgent. 

I was happy. 

The green apples fell on the sloping roof 

And rattled down. 

The wind was shaking me all night long; 

Shaking me in my sleep 

Like a definition of love,

Saying, this is the moment, 

Here, now.”   

—Ruth Stone, 1971

       “Here we are. It is March 2021. One year ago, I was sitting down in the very same space from which I am now composing this letter to begin writing the songs that would become the Hiss Golden Messenger record that was announced today. The record is called Quietly Blowing It—and I'm going to leave you to reckon with who is blowing it, & how, & why—and it will arrive on your doorstep in a tidy package with neat emotional boundaries sometime in June. But, of course, the writing of these songs was anything but clean & clear. It was actually quite messy. I was struggling to understand who I am, what my purpose is, in a world like the one that we all share. And I still am, frankly. The process was also joyful. There's nothing quite as liberating as singing, for the first time, a line that really works against a set of old chord changes made new by the melody leaning upon them. 

       I must have written 20 songs between March & June, often wedging my drum kit into my small 8'x10' studio space in the basement of my house to approximate the grooves that my friend Matt McCaughan would later play with much greater facility. Soon, the eleven songs that appear on Quietly Blowing It had winnowed themselves from the chaff of the others. Thematically, conceptually, & spiritually, they wanted to live together. I won't talk about how the songs are connected here—I'm hoping that will be obvious to you, the listener. I will say, however, that what emerged from all those months of consistent writing uninterrupted by travel or shows is a record that feels as vulnerable & downright interior as anything I've made since Bad Debt, a record I recorded long before anybody knew or cared who or what Hiss Golden Messenger was. 

       In the coming year, musicians are going be fielding a lot of questions about 'quarantine' albums. I'm going to push back on that narrative in part because I don't want Quietly Blowing It connected to a time in our collective history so rife with chaos, death, anxiety, & gaslighting. But also: Quietly Blowing It is a record that I've badly needed to make for a very long time, but one that I could not find the time or space to make at the pace I was running pre-pandemic. Creating Quietly Blowing It meant reckoning with some things in my life that required a lot of meditation and mediation. And therapy, frankly. Is that an indictment of the way artists have to hustle to make even a meager living? I don't know. Maybe. To me, it's almost like Quietly Blowing It exists on its own private monastery. It hasn't heard of the Coronavirus. And it hasn't heard of whatever else I was getting up to before the world shut down. All of this might not make any sense the way that I'm saying it here, but in my head it makes perfect sense. 

       In other words: I'm extremely proud of Quietly Blowing It. We made something special. The band on this record—which includes Chris Boerner, Matt McCaughan, Alex Bingham, Devonne Harris, Josh Kaufman, Matt Douglas, Stuart Bogie, Sonyia Turner, Zach Williams, Brevan Hampden, Buddy Miller, James Wallace, and Griffin and Taylor Goldsmith—plays with such breathtaking beauty. It's the sound of a group of people huddled together in a room trying to outrun demons. I can listen to any moment on this album and think, “Ah, yes—I know that feeling exactly.” Quietly Blowing It was mixed by my oldest friend, Scott Hirsch. It felt like coming home. I can't wait for you all to be able to listen to it from front to back. If you like what I do as Hiss Golden Messenger, you're going to love this record. I truly believe that. 

       I send love and appreciation to Merge Records, Brian Schwartz and Rachel Miller, Adam Voith, Jim Flammia, Luc Suer, my beautiful family, and all my dear musician and artist friends that inspire me to keep going. I also send lots of love and appreciation to you: Thank you all for being on this journey with me. I hope that you're finding some moments of peace & solace in these days of chaos. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

My grateful thanks,

M.C. Taylor

Durham, NC

[questionkayla]

2020 Vision: Blurry and Clear

It has been an incredible year and I have had life hit me in the most beautiful and painful ways since my last blog. 

Honestly, I am grateful I have had the capacity to actually blog again and do something for myself. In addition to dealing with the effects that 2020 has had on my mental health, being a therapist during this time has been one of the greatest challenges I could imagine. There was a collective trauma being experienced across our country and the world, that no one, especially myself, was prepared for. Nor was I prepared to help people cope with this trauma amid me trying to cope at the same time. Some of these traumatic experiences include the year beginning with the death of Kobe and Gianna Bryant, COVID-19 hitting and continuing to rise as I type, helping my clients cope with their losses related to the Coronavirus (i.e. death, separation, other missed opportunities/changes), the murder and vicarious trauma after the murder of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor, countless vigils for the death and murder of other black bodies through the country, microaggressions and racism everywhere being uncovered, loss or transformation of relationships I thought would never change, and of course the rising action toward the election and Trump’s inability to concede and take his L in peace. There are things I intentionally left out that were overwhelming because overall the point is made: this year was tough.

And as a black woman, the effects of 2020 brought dissonance in my identity experience. I saw the way the media and the world responded to the murder of Breonna Taylor and at the same time the way they also wanted black women to save America from this pain (hence Stacey Abrams, Kamala Harris, black women organizers, etc). I felt the same pull on my heart to transform the world because we (Black women) are told the weight of the world is on our shoulders because we are the strength of the nation. 

As beautiful as that sounds, carrying the weight while being whipped by systemic and explicit racism and sexism is a new form of slavery. 

But what happens if I or we stop? That’s the fear and heaviness that I have been carrying. Where can we be free from carrying everyone else’s mess? I don’t think these questions have been answered, but one thing I can be sure of is we have to maintain spaces for peace in a world that does not give us the opportunity to experience that. I am just now learning how to do this myself. I know, I am a therapist AND don’t judge me (insert Homer Simpson gif hiding in a bush).

In that same breath, I MUST acknowledge the ways God has blessed me despite how far I have moved from Him in the midst of my worries. I got MARRIED, which let me pause. This was the dopest experience, despite anything that came after it that I listed or did not list above. If you have read all of my blogs or some of them or simply me know me, then you know most of my difficult experiences have been from navigating being queer and Christian and never believing I would actually be able to experience being married to my love in front of people that love me with joy in my heart. That seems unheard of to my 13 year old self just beginning to explore their sexual identity. Shoot, I lowkey sounds unheard of to my 21 year old self, but here I am, about to 27 this week and married to a beautiful woman. Okay, I’ll go on. I also upgraded my Iphone, Queer Eyed my apartment (Got a SECTIONAL! Ahh-in my Meg The Stallion voice), got to share my experience on a blog (check out the Mental Unhealth Podcast by my friend Shatai on all streaming platforms), traded in my first car to join the Jeep gang, and went back to therapy.

The pieces of me that did not think I would make through this year in one piece are starting to take a step back to let me see what peace feels like. I am learning to feel and appreciate what love looks like and feels like, and it is tough to actually bask in that experience because, in this unpredictable world, it feels like the experience is unstable. The fact that I had enough love to write this shows I am growing and I love that for myself. We’ll see what happens next for me.

 Have a blessed rest of the year. I hope to come back stronger. 💖