#let the emperors run wild in hermitcraft

[heehoothefool]

So uh

@the-pigeon allow me to help and make a part 2 (assuming you do draw it, no pressure I've just had this in the back of my mind and your tags prompted me to actually make the post)!

Empires SMP 2 as DnD Races!

In reference to a previous post about their classes, I'd like to specify I am doing this with the emperors as players in mind. If they were NPCs this would be a very different list.

Joel: I'm gonna say aasimar. Like, normal aasimar. Wings, literally angels, close enough to being a big sexy god with those sick wings.

FWhip: He's a goblin what more do you want from me?

Jimmy: Once Aarakocra, but cursed into some sort of cloth construct or warforged. I'm gonna pin him down as warforged for the purposes of functioning within a game. It would be very neat to play.

Pix: Oh this man is a wood elf all day long he is a man of the past he is so old. Also very much a man of the woods. If, however, you wanted instead to tie him to the Copper King theory, some sort of high elf and maybe toss in some other in game stuff to make him live longer than he should in there.

Sausage: Fallen Aasimar to connect him to his lore of Pearl punting him to earth. He is the fallen protector. Alternatively, halfling considering the whole connection to nature thing and the general vibes of Sanctuary.

Scott: Oh this guy is a straight up fae. Just a fae. Look at that black market and those colors and tell me he is anything else.

Joey: Human. Literally just some guy. He's having a wonderful time.

Oli: Also a fallen aasimar except he's having a time about it. Lady how dare you. That was rude. He is a washed up angel with a lute.

False: Half elf but also she's a clone so do with that information what you will.

Gem: Sun elf. Praise the sun. It's so simple and also a fun call to her Hermitcraft self also being an elf.

Katherine: I want her to be a drow monster slayer please please please let me have this also the drow palette with her cute pink stuff would be so nice and would also go with the black version.

Shelby: Firbolg I can see it now. She lives in the swamp and is a little socially awkward but tends to be pretty friendly. I think Firbolg would suit her nicely.

Lizzie: Once human, her wild magic turned her into a tabaxi and she hasn't figured out how to change back. She runs a thinly veiled illusion at most times to try to appear like her normal self.

[vardinycx]

yknow from jimmy’s latest empires episode it kinda seems like it’s building up to the rift going all unstable and funky again when grumbot tries to activate it. i can only wonder what jimmy and fwhip’s interference will do. i sure hope some of the empires squad get yeeted into hermitcraft as a result and they have to fix grumbot *again*

[this-tumbleweed-surecan-fish]

An Unfinished Writing Masterlist

Because I don’t feel like tracking everything down right now. Sorry. Also some I just didn’t feel like including? They’re disowned now. I’m gonna sort these by fandom and Mountark.

Mountark (My Beloved)

The Series

Poison the Well; 17/? Chapters, Hermitcraft

A mining town can be a prison colony if I want it to be. And an unsolved murder can be a murder mystery any day.

A Good Deal - A Bad Decision; 1/1 Chapters, Hermitcraft

Committing to a bond has consequences. 

Despite Everything (It is still you); 1/2 Chapters, Hermitcraft

In which Pearl decides to finally have a conversation with Grian. It's long overdue.

Let our Love be a Flame not an Ember; 2/? Chapters, Empires SMP

The love story of a scam artist and an artist.

To Burn That Town To The Ground; 2/? Chapters, Empires SMP

Breaking News! The infamous Wither Rose Gang has finally been captured! Those damned Criminals will be brought before a Court of Law and finally face Justice!

Really there are only four people who aren't happy when the judge gives the sentence.

The Bard on the Church; 1/1 Chapters, Empires SMP

A very short thing with the only purpose of putting that lad in situations.

Aka Oli in Mountark, what will he do?

New Arrival; 1/1 Chapters, Empires SMP

Day 3 of Febuwhump: Joel arrives in the naughty corner.

It’s Ringing (It’s for you); 1/1 Chapters, Evo SMP

Day 18 of Febuwhump: The Police vs Watchers (Fail) (Not Clickbait)

Multiple (aka idfk)

Fish’s Library of Various One-Shots; 15/?

It comes to me in Dreams; 11/-

A collection of dreams from different worlds and visions of different lives. Aka I smush Evo, Empires, 3rd Life, Last Life and Hermitcraft into one crossover au.

Sorry I Came Back Wrong; 4/? Empires and Life Series Elements

The ankle had healed, the crush hadn't gotten better. And somehow since then everything and nothing at all had changed.

fWhip tries to deal with his crush and absolutely nothing goes wrong ever, not at all. - Can someone tell Grian to stop giving out weird shit? Also, why is his sister back in her magic phase?

FebuWhump 2023

Hermitcraft

All Dressed Up; 1/1 Chapters

In which Beef finds out that his boyfriend has a maid dress. That's it. 

Hitmen don’t get kidnapped by Spirits; 1/? Chapters

At least usually.

Iskall is not sure how he got into this situation. She's pretty sure it's better than prison though.

In which people need to stop vandalizing Cleo’s garden; 1/1 Chapters

Joe is about to contemplate the moral implications of encouraging two teenagers to commit murder before he realizes that he is friends with a god of death who runs a school that teaches teenagers to commit murder, and that is probably a train of thought he'll need a whole night for. 

A HC Soul Eater AU

Hiking Log; 1/1 Chapters

Day 22 of Febuwhump: "Joe turned the camera to the path again and he stopped the footage. The frame was blurry, still moving and slightly tilted. But there between the trees. There it was."

Empires SMP (Season 1, Season 2)

Fish writes made up Empires lore; the Series

Including such beloved titles as Lost to the Waves (Do you remember Home?) (3/3 Chapters), FFA: Fishfuckers Anonymous (8/8 Chapters), The Mad King (3/? Chapters), Witness me , Old Man, I am the Wild (2/? Chapters), Walking through Homes (2/? Chapters) and  It all Starts to Sound like Applause (18/? Chapters)

They don’t get engaged in this; 1/1 Chapters

Scott gives Jimmy his coat to keep him warm, not thinking much of it. Jimmy freaks out because six months is very early for a proposal.

Through the Snow; 3/? Chapters

The world is in a state of eternal winter. Mages, priests and scientists search for a way to bring back spring at any cost. The reincarnations of the old Emperors are no more than a wishful thought. Or are they?

Cactus Flower; 1/1 Chapters

"He's alive?" he whispered. The eye of the Vigil stared down at him and the tiny candle. It wouldn't let it burn. "He's alive," Pixlriffs repeated and felt tears gather in his eyes. There was still a chance they'd find him.

In which Pixlriffs loses his son and the King of Mezalea gains one.

Sinking Teeth; 4/? Chapters

It's one in the morning and he presses down on the gas pedal uncaring of the speed limit.

It's one in the morning and Joel is dying on his passenger seat.

The Art of Shutting the Fuck Up (And other Mezalean Specialties); 2/? Chapters

In my stay I have discovered many things about Mezalea, its people and their culture. And since I started because of the disappointing small section on Mezalea in the Crystal Cliffs Library, I am presenting my discoveries here, in this journal, for others to read and learn more. Out of respect for the Mezaleans I will omit a few details but still, I was able to learn a lot that I don't believe they'll object to me sharing.

Everything you Wish, Everything but Freedom; 1/? Chapters

Corrupted Scott manipulates Jimmy and traps him.

 But our Flowers are Withered, the Leaves Blown to Dust; 16/? Chapters

It was something so inherently Grimmish, to give someone a piece of unprocessed Redstone as a sign of affection, something so fWhip that he couldn't help but smile. What a weird custom. How wonderful. How wonderful that he was the one fWhip had chosen to give it to.

Meteor Shower; 13/13 Chapters - Multi Dimensional Big Bang Fic

It starts with a notification from his calender app, reminding fWhip that he meant to actually see his friends from school again at some point. He decides to try and reach out and before he knows it they're spending two weeks of vacation together. The twelve of them. The old gang. Just like they used to.

And then the meteor crashes.

Nebula; 1/1 Chapters

There's nothing someting everything wrong with Joel. aka The only normal person in the group [post meteor]. aka How do you go back to normal when the stranger in the mirror is wearing your skin? When you're wearing a stranger's skin? How do you know who is who?

(A sequel to my fic Meteor Shower. Read that before you read this, it'll make more sense)

Star-forming Regions; 2/? Chapters

Lizzie and Joel being platonically in love throughout the years. Wait... that's not... What is going on? (Part of the Meteor Shower AU)

Let’s Play A Game (Where We Both Lose); 1/1 Chapters

Do not challenge the gods, that's what all the fables and legends say. So really, Pixlriffs should know better.

Pixlriffs and Joel make a bet.

Can’t Wake From This; 7/? Chapters

Jimmy goes to sleep at home with his boyfriend and wakes up somewhere else. As he tries to navigate his strange circumstances, somewhere else he is presumed dead. It's not like anything can happen to him though, he's fine.

Right?

Break the Mold; 1/1 Chapters

One thing that never got old, no matter how long Joel was in this business, was waking up in a place he couldn't remember getting to. Todays mystery place was quite bright. He could tell even with closed eyes.

The Crown Academy; 1/? Chapters

On the 1st of October 1989, fourty-three women gave birth. This was unusual only in the fact that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began. Eccentric millionaire Sir Reginald Hargreeves set out to adopt as many of these children as he could.

(He got thirteen)

King of the Endless Meza; 1/1 Chapters

The Return of the King Or; The King of Mezalea is many things, but most importantly, he is supposed to be dead for over a thousand years.

Myself as a Construct; 1/1 Chapters

There's a dead king in Tumble Town. Again. Or; The Sheriff knows trouble when he sees it, but that doesn't mean he understands it. So when the stranger leaves and the God returns he is actually glad. And then it happens again. This time Pixlriffs won't have to murder him afterwards.

Don’t You Hear It Breathing?; 1/? Chapters

Welcome to our little town! I'm sure you'll settle in fine. Just... ignore the calls at night. And don't go into the woods after dark. Not that there is anything unusual about this place, of course. Just be careful.

Heimweh; 1/1 Chapters

Jimmy can't help but feel like everyone's going to leave him one day.

Ah, yes, Me, my Boyfriend, my Boyfriend, a Zombie, my Boyfriend and his 1,50m Stuffed Donkey; 1/1 Chapters

They go on a fair date. That's pretty much it.

Life SMP

They Scratch and Bite and Bark; 1/2 Chapters

In which Joel gets adopted by a pack of dogs against his will.

Or something.

After Life SMP

It’s the Same Old Flames; 1/1 Chapters

Lizzie remembers nothing of her live but something is all too familiar about Joel.

I know that After Life has nothing to do with Empires but I have elected to ignore that ^-^

Dream SMP

they exist. i think there’s three of them

He Slayed The MInotaur; 3/4 Chapters

A monster makes its home near the icy village Octorso Glen. But that's okay. If a monster settles, a hero will come to defeat it. That's how it is in all the stories Phil tells them when they can't sleep at night. They just have to wait.

Techno had never been very patient.

A Universal Language; 1/1 Chapters

Day 9 of Febuwhump: How to make yourself heard without speaking 101.