#lesenbyan.

[drabbleswithdragons]

5 6 & 8 for the disability ask game

5 - if you have multiple disabilities: do they affect each other? how?

oh yeah my disabilities are like an impossibly tangled mess of string. the best example is happening right now, actually. I need infusions to treat multiple conditions, but in order to do that I would need a port. because I have a pacemaker for my heart condition, I would need a sternotomy (cut the sternum in half to access the heart) to replace my current pacemaker with an epicardial one. which is basically the same as a normal pacemaker except instead of being in your bloodstream the pacemaker is outside your heart in your chest. simple right. however! this surgery is very risky with a compromised immune system...which can only be treated with the infusions I would need the port for....and that's how it is for *everything*.

6 - what's something good that's come out of being disabled?

the first thing that comes to mind is friends! I don't really have friends that aren't disabled in some way lol. and I've made a lot more connections within the disabled community than I've ever been able to in other areas of my life.

8 - does your disability affect how you experience parts of your identity?

a major thing that comes to mind is the Deaf community, I am much more at home when signing with people who Understand the struggles of severe hearing loss. but the biggest thing is like, I don't think I would want a cure for my genetic conditions? which is maybe controversial. I feel like they are an inextricable part of what makes me Me, and I'm not sure who I would have been if those weren't there. so that affects how I perceive and interact with myself and the world.

[crippleprophet]

Hey Mac, I hope this finds you on a good day <3

I was wondering if you knew anything about peripheral neuropathy? I ran into it a while ago when looking up one of my numerous problems and since then have realized it could well explain many of my issues! The issue being said issues started when I was a small child and everything i'm finding with any information I can acrually parse on it is only mentioning things like Guillain-Barre Arthritis and Cancer- things either unlikely in a child of 8 or to last undiagnosed or treated for 20 years.

If you know anything or can point me in a good direction to go on a deep dive about it I'd appreciate it! I hope the rest of your day/night is gentle on you.

hey, thank you <33 this is really interesting & concerning to me because once again information about incredibly common experiences is so hard to come by – i’ve experienced peripheral neuropathy for a couple years which i’m on medication for (duloxetine, generic of cymbalta), and while i haven’t dedicated a ton of research to that specifically, i have definitely come across information when researching other conditions, and basically my understanding is it can be caused by most autoimmune diseases.

probably the first thing most people will think of from the words “peripheral neuropathy” is diabetes, which mostly happens in the feet, i believe due to lower circulation because that’s the case for most foot impairments in diabetics. neuropathy can definitely be experienced in things like (juvenile in your case) rheumatoid arthritis, ankylosing spondylitis, lupus, etc, either as a primary symptom or through secondary symptoms-the-medical-establishment-labels-fibromyalgia.

i know a lot of sick/crip spaces encourage looking into small fiber neuropathy (SFN) as well so that may be a starting point for you. an additional tactic i’d probably try if you haven’t already is like, “[something you think you might have],” for example “juvenile RA,” + “neuropathy” in PubMed & seeing where that takes you… again it’s such a common symptom that we really don’t understand enough about but that could hopefully turn up something that resonates with your experiences.

feel free to send another ask or dm me if there’s anything i can do to help! other folks feel free to chime in with suggestions if you have them. best of luck to you & i hope you find something helpful <33

[sezja]

!!

For every !! I receive, I'll tell you about one of my OCs!

Furan Banjo!

Who's got two knives an' a hankerin' for adventure?

Furan Banjo - better known as just Banjo - is a card-carrying member of the Rogues' Guild, and a proud citizen of Limsa Lominsa. They washed ashore in a rickety boat with their older brother some twenty years ago, and were more or less adopted by Baderon Tenfingers... which is to say he occasionally bought them food and saw to it the two children were left alone, and did his level best to keep them out of trouble.

Banjo is a fun-loving free spirit, always eager to start trouble if it means something amusing will come of it - though not the sort of trouble that'll get them in hot water with the guild. When a group of adventurers led by a charismatic but airheaded young viera drift into Limsa Lominsa, Banjo quickly realizes this is exactly the sort of fun they've been looking for; they waste little time weaseling their way into Slejsa Iryut's party. And there they stay...

...Until things start to get a lot more serious than they bargained for.

By the time all hells break loose at a certain banquet, it's too late to run.

[composeregg]

Apricot <3 (no really I just follow you bc same fandoms)

ah is THAT why my pain is worse today, I am being Poisoned? Or is the poison just the brain rot of fandoms lmao

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

req'd by @lesenbyan

... i did a google all i'm getting is rosamund pike

text: Thank you. I will treasaure these thoughts of Rosamund's penis.

[lesenbyan]

Eyo babes and lads breaking news: I turn 28 in a week! (Feb 28) I'd love to 1) actually put money towards my Debt but also 2) to treat myself guilt free. If you're willing and able to help a very disabled boi out I'd be grateful! My venmo is @lesenbyan and my paypal (link). Of course no pressure don't donate if you can't afford to etc etc

[medi-melancholy]

commission of @lesenbyan’s ff14 character!!

[drabbleswithdragons]

1, 2, 5, 6, 7 for writer asks <3

This is going to be from a fanfic perspective because while I *did* just hit 30,000 words in my novel (!!)...no one knows any context for the characters haha.

1. Who's your favorite character to write?

Essek Thelyss from Critical Role. I like seeing especially relationship dynamics through his perspective in my writing. OR Vex and Vax from campaign 1, because you can't have one without the other.

2. Who's your least favorite to write?

Also Critical Role...Beau's dad. He's an ass and he's too much like my own dad for comfort 😅. Also, though I love him, I despise writing Hisoka from Hunter x Hunter. He's just the right kind of despicable to enjoy watching and hate writing.

5. What's the easiest thing to write for you?

Descriptions! Especially of inner experiences, like character who are quietly panicking in the background while trying to Act Fine, or descriptions of settings.

6. What's the hardest thing to write for you?

Natural dialogue, I think is hardest. Thinking about how each character talks and their mannerisms, and how those mannerisms interact with each other...also I have to do significant editing because my dialogue tends to just. become how I talk/write/think? which is generally different to the character I'm writing.

7. Do you plan everything out before your write or do you go with the flow?

I rarely plan anything. My best ideas tend to come when I do just go with the flow. I think in like. Concepts? So trying to take those and translate them into a written outline is sooo tedious i just. jot down general notes if i can and then write whatever. Then go back and reverse outline to find the holes.

[lesenbyan]

Yo trans and only worked a week in all of Feb, my venmo is lesenbyan

Okay i can't take screenshots on my phone but Tumblr mobile is serving ads from the HRC inviting me to thank trans soldiers and congratulate Pete Buttigieg for being the first LGBTQ+ cabinet member and. Like.

Fucking.

Please reblog this with links to your donations page if you're an LGBTQ+ person who needs funds for housing or healthcare or food so that I can reblog it because I'm full of rage at what the donations to HRC are being spent on and would like to actually see money to real people, not to Tumblr ads celebrating a price-fixing opponent of universal healthcare getting appointed to the cabinet by a dude who legislated the war on drugs.

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

req'd by @lesenbyan

often is

text: The answer is lesbians

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

req'd by @lesenbyan

most chickens are demonic I wouldn't worry about it

text: What about your hen? She's got a demon in her. That wasn't a figure of speech?

[sezja]

You wish you were this cool.

(feat. @lesenbyan )

[sezja]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last ten people who reblogged something from you! Get to know your mutuals & followers!! <3

(no pressure tho!)

Aaaaa okay let's go

Jeryk from FFXIV's Shadowbringers

What a ray of sunshine; he always makes me smile

2. Final Fantasy IX! My favorite game Of All Time. I've been doing a replay in small snippets before bed most nights, which is nice. Love the technological innovation that's made my childhood favorites playable in portable ways.

3. @lesenbyan 💖 ....and also @mootablemimic and @doppeldebacle, my irl besties without all of whom I would have probably snapped by now.

4. Reading! I got myself an Illumicrate subscription to get my hands on some books I might not have picked up otherwise, and I've been enjoying the decision. I don't have a ton of time or energy for reading these days, but I make time on my lunch breaks at work, and it always kind of helps my brain to recharge a little bit.

5. Him....

Jack my beloved angel baby

[sezja]

Ooh i'd love to hear more about ciceroix, if you have more lore. like how do the haillenarte kids feel about him, and him them. what about barendouin

Do I ever!

So I must begin with the preface that @lesenbyan has a headcanon/AU where Chlodebaimt de Haillenarte survived the fall of the Steel Vigil, badly wounded but alive nonetheless, but fled in shame, so his family - who never found his body but had no reason whatsoever to believe he could have survived - presume he's dead. Instead, he makes it as far as Hyrstmill in the Shroud, and there builds a new life for himself.

Which is where Ciceroix finds him.

They strike up a tentative friendship well before Ciceroix ever reveals who he actually is - Ciceroix knows who Chlode is, right away, and Chlodebaimt has his suspicions (on account of the Haillenarte genes being very strong). But they grow close regardless, because Ciceroix is content to let his nephew have his secrets, without trying to pry at them; he's glad to have one nephew, when he's been denied the rest.

Because uh, Baurendouin hates him! Emphatically despises him. Ciceroix doesn't blame him for it - he was kind of an asshole growing up, and spent a lot of his youth being a disgrace and a deliberate Problem. He is, therefore, not allowed to meet the rest of the Haillenarte kids. He's only barely even allowed within Ishgard, and is expected to keep his distance from the nobility in the process.

It hasn't stopped him from hearing about their accomplishments: he often mingles with the lowborn, so he's heard a great deal about Stephanivien's initiatives with machinistry, and Francel and Aurvael's work rebuilding and improving the Firmament, as well as the affection the men who serve under Laniaitte have for her. He's proud of them all, albeit from a distance.

It's kind of a shame, because I do feel he and Baurendouin would get along better after the latter loosens up a bit over the course of the MCH quests, but Ciceroix hasn't attempted to bridge the gap, and Baurendouin wouldn't think to do so.

[sezja]

Wild as hell to me that @lesenbyan and I started doing raids the week they dropped in Shadowbringers, with the NieR raids, of all things

Like what a wild-ass trial by fire that turned out to be; no raid will ever scare me again

[sezja]

@lesenbyan and I have been marathoning the Swan Princess movies, and guys, they are - all of them - somehow better and worse than I'd imagined. Do recommend.