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jaydizzel2844 · 1 year ago
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Marie x Jordan Drabble
No. 6
Hanging out with Jordan is always fun, which ever form they take. André never got peoples hang up over the gender thing was, Jordan was cool either way.
But he’ll admit that they’re easier to carry back to campus drunk off their ass when they’re a girl.
Him and Luke were easily able to hold up Jordan between them and with Cate to open doors and shit getting Jordan back to their dorm room was easy.
There was one small hiccup.
“Noooo, I wanna say good night to my beautiful amazing girlfriend with the best ass ever first .” Jordan whined.
“Buddy it’s 3am, she’s asleep you can talk to her in the morning.” Luke tried to reason with them as they got to the courtyard outside side of the dorms.
“Also your obsession with her ass is a little concerning.” Andre added.
The four of them had gone clubbing. It was a last minute plan and it wasn’t meant to be an original four night out but the other three were busy. Sam had an important assignment for his puppeteering class and Marie and Emma already had plans for a roommates movie night.
Andre probably should have realised that that meant Jordan would be fourth wheeling him, Luke and Cate leading to the shapeshifter spending most of the time out at the bar doing shots with the new friends they’d made while the 3 of them were being throuple-y.
But they all had a good night regardless and hopefully Jordan won’t have too bad of a hangover tomorrow.
“No it’s not. And she might not be asleep,” Jordan slurred out. “She was having a movie night, those can go pretty late.”
The look in Jordan’s eyes was too hopeful Andre couldn’t help it.
“Alright I’ll text her.”
“Thank you, thank you thank you. I just want to say good night and that I love her.”
“Whoa what? Is the first time you’re saying the L word?” Cate exclaimed, stopping the 4 of them from going any further.
“Lesbians?” Jordan asked, confused.
“No, love.” Luke explained “fuck you are way too drunk.”
“Oh sorry, yes I love her but I haven’t told her yet. I’m going to do it tonight.” Jordan looked so proud of themselves.
“No you are not,” Cate told them firmly. “Not when you’re too drunk to stand up on your own.”
“But..”
“She’s right dude,” Andre interrupted. “You got to make shit like that romantic, like recreate your first date or something.”
“I should recreate getting shitfaced at Dusty’s?”
“No,” Luke said with a laugh. “The dinner you two went out for the week after that. At the Korean place off campus. Or do something else romantic. Basically do tell her but not tonight.”
“Ok, can I still tell her good night?” Jordan’s big brown eyes were impossible to say no to.
“If she’s up.” Andre said pulling out his phone.
To Marie🩸
U up?
Jordan wants to say good night
From Marie🩸
Yeah ?
Are they ok?
To Marie🩸
Yep just drunk
We’ll swing by your room in 5
From Marie🩸
Cool
Actually I’ll met you at their room
Don’t want to wake Emma
—-
“When did you know you loved her?” Cate asked as they entered the dorm building and headed for the elevator. Getting Jordan to their room was going a lot quicker now that they knew Marie was waiting for them there.
“Um, she was giving me a blowjob..”
“How romantic.” Cate interrupted.
“Fuck off, anyway I switched during it by accident. I thought I majorly fucked up, like totally freaked her out but I didn’t. She just kept going. And I just knew then and there that she wanted all of me, exactly as I am and she makes me feel so happy and good about myself and I’ve never been in love before but I’m pretty sure that this is it.”
“Ok that’s a bit romantic.” Cate admits at they got out of the elevator on Jordan’s floor.
“Thank you.”
Marie was waiting for them at Jordan’s doom in slippers and a hoodie that Cate is pretty sure belongs to Jordan over her pyjamas.
Once Jordan saw her they slipped out of Luke and Andre’s arms and staggered into Marie’s.
“You got it from here or do you need help getting them into bed?” Luke asked.
“No I got it, thanks.” Marie said as she opened the dorm room door while Jordan nuzzled into her neck. “Goodnight”
***
Drunk Jordan was compliant if a bit cuddly so getting them into their pyjamas and into bed wasn’t too difficult.
“Sorry I didn’t come out tonight, it looks like you had a lot of fun.” Marie said as she helped Jordan sit on the bed so she could untie their shoes.
“Nah, it’s cool. You have fun with Emma?”
“Yep, we watched mean girls and a few other classics that’s she was horrified that I hadn’t seen yet. You?”
“Yep, it was so fun. So many shots, maybe too many.” Jordan got up and wrapped their arms around Marie, one hand sliding down to her ass before stopping. “Do you mind that I do that?”
“What?” Pulling out of Jordan’s arms so she could take their shirt off and replace it with a pyjama top.
“Me putting my hands on your ass, like you’ve joked about it a few times and Andre says I’m obsessed but does it bother you?” Jordan looked so concerned as Marie was undoing their belt.
She smiled to herself. “I don’t mind it, kind of like it to be honest.”
“Really?” They asked with so much relief and hope on their face that Marie couldn’t help but kiss them before getting back to taking their jeans off.
“Yeah, I’m been pretty unwanted all my life but I’m never insecure about you wanting me because you make it so obvious that you do, through ass grabbing.” Marie said with a laugh “you also make it clear that you enjoy spending time with me and are an all round amazing partner. Plus I know I have a great ass, I’d be offended if you didn’t appreciate it.”
Once Jordan was in their bed Marie pulled off her hoodie and slippers and joined them.
“It was really cool to hang out with they guys, even if I was fourth wheeling.” Jordan said cuddling into her side. “They give good advice.”
“Like what?” Marie asked as she started to doze off.
“They said not to tell you that I love you when I’m drunk. I’m gonna do it over dinner, make it romantic.”
Marie was suddenly wide awake while Jordan was out like a light. She just about managed to stop her self from jumping for joy or something equally as embarrassing and likely to wake up her partner.
‘Jordan loves me,’ she thought to herself self as she closed her eyes to go to sleep. ‘And I love them too.’
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cemeteryangel725 · 1 month ago
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Bewitched, a Good Omens Ineffable Wives fic by CemeteryAngel725
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Yesterday was a busy day for me on AO3! In addition to my Kinktober chapter and my Spooky Bang piece, I also posted this birthday oneshot for my lovely @shipper-of-all-things, the best cheerleader and chatwife a gal could ever ask for. Cowie, I just knew you needed some bespoke WWII noir lesbians in your life!
Rated E, 3,050 words
Summary:
New York City. December 1942.
Crowley is grateful for the work, really, she is. She loves playing the piano at Luke Rossetti's club, loves watching Angel taking command of the room, loves sneaking around together in the dressing room when no one is looking. But Luke is a dangerous man, and he has his eye on Angel. And Crowley would never, ever let anything happen to her.
Excerpt:
“Angel, you look incredible.”
“Thank you, darling.” Angel’s eyes met Crowley’s in the mirror, sparkling with warmth. “And you are looking quite dashing this evening yourself.”
Crowley peeked into the mirror, and she had to agree. She was particularly proud of her ensemble tonight: the navy wide-legged trousers and fitted waistcoat layered over a dusky blue-gray Oxford shirt, a blood-red cravat tied in an oversized bow at her throat. She took off her wide-brimmed fedora and placed it on the dressing room counter, bending down to press an open-mouthed kiss into the soft skin at the base of Angel’s throat.
“Mmm,” Angel purred, rolling her shoulder into Crowley’s caress and turning her face to ghost her breath over the shell of Crowley’s ear. “But darling — I’ve just spent the past hour getting my makeup on and doing my hair just so.”
“Let me do all the work,” Crowley purred. “I promise — not a single hair out of place on your pretty head.”
Read more on AO3!
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fortheloveofwonderland · 2 years ago
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But it’s Better if You Do | SR x Fem! Reader
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Summary - the Blue Siren strip club is the last place Spencer Reid wants to spend his birthday. And the absolute last thing he needs is to fall for you, the magnetic exotic dancer who Morgan and Luke pay to give him a birthday dance.
A/N - as a rule, I am not technically writing Spencer x Reader right now but this is for @imagining-in-the-margins damsel in distress challenge although it’s a very vague fit. Kind of anti damsel in distress? I don’t know, let’s just roll with it. Candy Shop by 50 Cent is the song used in Magic Mike XXL when Adam Rodriguez does his lil sexy dance so the song choice was an homage to that. Loosely based around the Panic at the Disco song “But it’s Better if You Do.”
Pairing - Spencer Reid x Exotic Dancer Fem! Reader
Category - fluff I suppose? Maybe mild angst. Happy ending.
CW - exotic dancer reader, Morgan and Luke are bad wingmen, hints at lesbian Emily, strip clubs, snarky Spencer, drinking, swearing, Spencer and his inappropriate erection, brief mentions of masturbation, making out.
WC - 8.2k
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Oh, isn't this exactly where you'd like me?
I'm exactly where you'd like me, you know.
Praying for love and a lap dance,
And paying in naivety.
The last place Spencer Reid ever expected to find himself on his fortieth birthday was at the Blue Siren Club just off of Dupont Circle. For starters, Spencer wasn’t a big drinker so going to a bar didn’t appeal to him on any other given night, let alone his birthday, but there was much more to the Blue Siren than just being your run of the mill club.
The Blue Siren was well known as being one of the most reputable strip clubs in the district. According to the extensive research Spencer had done when he found out he was to be coming here, it was one of the more exclusive clubs, and if Morgan was to be believed it was popular among law enforcement and other government officials due to its clandestine nature.
From the outside, the Blue Siren looked just like a normal club. If you were to pass it by you may not even glance up at the exposed brick facade and black front door. In the lone window in the front sat a small blue neon sign boosting the club's name and that was all. You wouldn’t be alone in walking right past the establishment without batting an eyelid. 
When Luke had suggested the idea to spend his birthday here, Spencer’s immediate reaction had been laughter, because it had to be a joke, right? Strip clubs and Spencer Reid were not a combination anyone who knew him would put together, surely? 
“Why are you laughing?” Luke frowned at him, folding his arms across his chest. 
“Because you’re making a joke?” 
“No, I’m not.” 
“You’re not?” Spencer’s laughter came to a sudden halt and he stared at Luke in disbelief. “You…you seriously think that’s how I want to spend my birthday?” 
“I was talking to Morgan and-“
“No sentence in the history of the English language that starts with “I was talking to Morgan” has ever had a happy ending.” Spencer scoffed. 
“It’s the happy ending part we’re trying to achieve.” Luke smirked at him, a playful hint in his eye that caused Spencer to swallow thickly at the implication. 
“Y-you…I…” 
“When was the last time you got laid, Reid?” 
Spencer felt the moment his cheeks burnt with an intense embarrassment. In all the years he’d known Luke they had never once discussed their sex lives. In fact, Spencer made it a rule to never discuss his sex life with anyone. 
“That’s a deeply personal question.” He shrunk in on himself. 
“Which is Spencer Reid for, it’s been a while.” Luke smiled knowingly. 
“I…I don’t have to answer that.” 
“You kinda just did.” 
“Regardless,” Spencer shook his head, trying to steer the conversation off of his sex life, or lack thereof. “Strip clubs aren’t brothels. The women don’t sleep with their customers.”
“Morgan and I decided it was slightly more appropriate than buying you a hooker.” 
If Spencer thought he was embarrassed before, he was now absolutely mortified. 
“I don’t need help getting “laid”, as you so eloquently put it.” Spencer shook his head, turning back to his desk and sorting through some papers to distract himself.
“Don’t you?” An amused voice came from behind him and Spencer groaned, running his hands through his hair. He turned slowly in his chair to see Emily standing over him, an almost delighted look in her eyes. “What are we talking about?”
“Morgan and I want to take Reid to Blue Siren for his birthday next week.” Luke filled her in.
“Oh that place is great!” She beamed. “Can I come?”
“Where are we going?” Rossi seemingly appeared as if from nowhere with his coffee and newspaper. 
Spencer grumbled, face palming his hand as the group around him gathered.
“We’re taking Spence to Blue Siren for his birthday.” Emily happily told him.
“Blue Siren? Huh,” Rossi nodded his head. “I haven’t been there for years, count me in. I’ll even see if Hotch wants to join.”
“For the love of god.” Spencer muttered against his hand. No one seemed to hear him and if they did, they ignored him.
“Join what? What did I miss?” Garcia came tottering in on her too high heels, laptop balanced precariously in the crook of her arm.
“Apparently the kid wants to go to a strip club for his birthday.” Rossi informed her.
“No, No.” Spencer shook his head, looking up at them. “The kid does not want to go to a strip club for his birthday.”
“Oh isn’t it the big four-oh?” Garcia bounced up and down in excitement. “You have to do something special for it!”
“I highly doubt a strip club can be deemed as special.” Spencer rolled his eyes.
“Strip club?” Matt strolled into the conversation now and Spencer wanted to just vanish into thin air.
“Yeah we’re taking Reid for his birthday. Want in?” Luke asked him.
“As long as no one ever tells Kristy.” Matt chuckled. 
“What aren’t we telling Kristy?” Tara popped her head up from her desk, Spencer didn’t even know she was there. 
“That we’re going to a strip club for Reid’s birthday.” Matt offered her a sly smile.
“Oh sweet! Count me in.” She grinned. 
“How about you guys go, since you’re all so excited about it and just tell me how it was? I’ll stay home with a book or something.” Spencer sighed but no one acknowledged him. 
The door opened again and JJ meandered in, all eyes turning to look at her. 
“Uh, hi?” She laughed awkwardly as she walked across the bullpen.
“Have you ever been to a strip club, Jayje?”
Spencer groaned loudly, crumbling in on himself and smacking his head against the hardwood of his desk. Sometimes it was just easier to go along with these things than try to fight them.
And so, only slightly against his will, Spencer let them talk him into spending his birthday in the last place he ever expected to find himself, least of all on his birthday. The whole team was in attendance, plus Morgan and Hotch, he could only assume to have a front row seat to his complete mortification. They met outside the club, waiting for JJ who was late due to the fact she couldn't get Michael to go to sleep. Luke had gone so far as to pick Spencer up from his apartment, which was in the opposite direction, just so the birthday boy wouldn’t have an excuse for ditching them at the last minute.
“Is that really what you’re wearing to go to a strip club, pretty boy?” Morgan nudged Spencer in the arm.
Spencer glanced down at his attire, what he would call a sensible outfit but was clearly not what he was supposed to be wearing given Morgan’s judgemental gaze. It wasn’t a far cry from what he wore everyday, it wasn’t as though Morgan had never seen him dress like this before. He’d donned a perfectly pressed pair of black slacks, pairing them with his old faithful converse, a crisp blue button down and his black Comme Des Garçons cardigan Rossi had gifted him for his birthday a few years ago. He’d decided against a tie, because that seemed too formal for the occasion even for him. 
“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” He frowned, pouting a little. 
He quickly eyed up the other men who were all wearing jeans and t-shirts, Rossi and Hotch included. He couldn’t even get started on how strange it was to see Hotch in jeans. 
“You look like a TA.” Matt shrugged. 
“I always look like a TA. Do you guys think I suddenly dress differently outside of work?” He folded his arms.
“I kind of hoped you did.” Luke smirked. 
“Isn’t it supposed to be my birthday?” Spencer grumbled. “I’m already at the last place I want to celebrate so please can we just leave my outfit choices alone?” 
“I think you look dapper.” Tara patted his shoulder like he was her annoying kid brother or something. 
“Thanks?” He pulled a face. 
“And speaking of birthdays!” Garcia was rummaging in her oversized purse before pulling something out. “Voila!”
Spencer frowned at the large, slightly garish, blue and yellow badge proclaiming “Forty Today” in obnoxious bubble font. It was bigger than Garcia’s hand, she surely didn’t expect him to wear that.
“Uh, no offence but there is no way in hell you are getting me to wear that.” He took it from her anyway, slotting it in the front of his satchel. 
“Spoil sport.” Emily chided him. “Anyone would think you don’t like your birthday!”
“I don’t very much like this particular birthday.” He muttered under his breath. “Where is Jennifer? I’d really like to just get this over with.” 
As if on cue, he heard heels on the concrete ground and seconds later the blonde appeared, dragging someone behind her. She smiled as she came round the corner, tugging Will into view under the streetlamp. 
Oh good, more people to witness my humiliation. 
“Hey guys, sorry we’re late!” She gave them apologetic glances. 
“Will, I didn’t know you’d be joining us.” Penelope hugged JJ and then Will.
“You think I was going to sit at home while my wife goes to a strip club?” He chuckled. “I may never get the opportunity to have permission to do this again in my life. Thanks Spence.” 
“You’re so very welcome.” Spencer replied sarcastically. “Can we just get on with this now?” 
“That’s the spirit.” Luke chuckled, draping his arm around Spencer’s shoulders and leading him through the non-descript door.
Inside a long, narrow corridor stretched out before them, the distant thrums of bass heavy music, causing the floor to feel like it was vibrating beneath him. A burly doorman awaited them, so broad he almost encompassed the entire corridor. 
“Hey man, I have a reservation under Alvez. It's this guy's big four-oh.” Luke gripped Spencer tightly, shaking him a little. 
The doorman glanced down at a piece of paper in his hand, scanning over it for a second before looking back up at the motley crew, clearly trying to discern if he needed to card anyone but it was immediately clear he didn’t. 
“Follow me,” He motioned for them to come with him.
Luke took the lead, dragging Spencer by his hold on his shoulders. The music got louder the further down the black corridor they got. It was dark and Spencer had to squint to see the man only a few feet in front of him, the corridor only lit by a single red light bulb swinging from the low ceiling that Spencer almost had to duck to walk under. 
At the end of the corridor was another door and the music had reached fever pitch at this point. Spencer felt as though he could taste the beat, he could certainly feel it palpitating in his chest. The doorman shoved open the door and Spencer blinked against the sudden wave of lights that smacked against his retinas. 
Luke finally let go of his shoulders, the doorway too narrow for the two of them to pass through together and motioned Spencer in front of him. Spencer stepped into the room, surprised by the sudden change in flooring, casting his eyes down to see a plush burgundy carpet now under foot. He tried not to contemplate how many germs were living in that carpet, how many drinks had been spilled and soaked into it over the years, how many other fluids it might have absorbed on top of it. He was sure this place would light up like a christmas tree under a black light. 
He grimaced, looking back up and following in the doormans footsteps across the room. He tried to keep his eyes straight ahead, desperate not to look around and take in his surroundings but his morbid curiosity got the better of him. 
Admittedly if he’d imagined what the inside of a strip club would look like this would have been plucked straight from his imagination. The main lighting was low, shielding most of the seating area in an almost ominous glow. The booths were made up of plush, gold velvet sofas, large dark oak tables in the centre of them. There was a long bar on one side, made of the same oak only its surface seemed to glitter when the light hit it. Over the back were two large velveteen curtains, concealing what Spencer could only assume was the private dance areas. There were four raised platforms each with their own golden, floor to ceiling pole in the centre, blue spotlights pointed at each one. Each podium had a scantily clad young girl dancing in upon it and Spencer quickly averted his gaze again, not wanting to be seen to objectify them. 
“You know the whole reason they are there is to be looked at right?” Morgan was suddenly at his side, nudging him in the arm. 
“It feels very…voyeuristic.” Spencer swallowed.
“Have you seriously never been to a strip club, Reid?” Matt was now at his other side. 
“Why is that so hard to believe? Do I really strike you as the kind of guy who goes to strip clubs?” They arrived at the table and Morgan motioned for Spencer to take a seat while the others sat around him. 
“It’s usually the quiet ones.” Morgan smirked at him. 
“I cannot believe Savannah is ok with you being here.”
“She was fine with it when I told her it was for your birthday.” Morgan winked at him.
“Do I need to tell you what I told Luke? This is not a brothel, I am not getting laid here.” Spencer sighed in exasperation. 
“It's not too late to take you to a brothel, kid.” Rossi smirked, before excusing himself to the bar. 
“This is the lesser of the two evils, trust me.” Spencer sat back against the plush seat and tried to keep his eyes to himself. It was a difficult feat when just in front of them was another podium with a blonde woman dancing in the skimpiest pair of underwear Spencer had ever seen. 
“No deflowering of boy wonder tonight, please.” Garcia giggled.
“Deflower…you are aware I am not a virgin, right?” Spencer pulled a face, was that how people saw him? 
“I was joking, Spence, calm down.” Garcia rolled her eyes, still tittering to herself. 
“It's that kind of defensive attitude that makes people think you are.” Luke, who was sitting on his left, nudged him. 
“I’m fairly certain if I said the same to you, you would be just as defensive.” Spencer shook his head. 
Just then, Rossi returned carrying a tray of champagne flutes and setting them on the table in the centre. He was closely followed by another young woman carrying an ice bucket in each hand, each with a bottle of the club's most expensive champagne chilling inside. 
Spencer didn’t want to look, really didn’t want to be seen to objectify, but the scent of lavender perfume seemed to flood his senses, his brain, and he could no longer think straight all of a sudden. His eyes which had been attached to the floor glanced over to the pair of deep purple, satin peep toe heels which were standing right in front of him. Slowly his eyes trailed upwards, over a set of long, smooth legs, until meeting a silk pair of dangerously tiny panties, matching the shoes in colour, which he quickly scanned over. His eyes worked up the torso until they came to the chest and the purple silk bra that really left very little to the imagination. Swallowing thickly, his eyes continued their ascent to the face and that’s when time seemed to slow to a halt.
Spencer quivered, actually trembled as he took in your soft features and dazzling eyes. The smile on your lips as you looked at him seemed genuine, and not at all like it was a pain for you to be here. You set down the ice buckets and went about opening one of the bottles, pouring everyone a glass. When you poured Spencer’s glass, bending a little as you did so, his eyes couldn’t help the way they dipped to your cleavage spilling out over the top of your bra.
He quickly snapped his gaze away and thanked you with a shaky smile. He crossed one leg over the other in an attempt to hide an arising problem in his pants.
“I’m Y/N, I’ll be your host for the evening.” You had to speak loudly to be heard by everyone over the pulsing music in the club. “Which one of you is the birthday boy?”
Your eyes flicked between the men in the group, well all of them except the all guy who had paid for the drinks. You’d been informed it was a fortieth birthday, there was no way it was him. 
“This guy right here,” Morgan grinned, gripping Spencer by the shoulders. 
You looked back at the slightly shy, uptight man in his shirt and cardigan, who was holding onto his champagne flute for dear life. He was not your usual clientele, if you didn’t know any better you would think he didn’t want to be here at all. 
“Well, I guess it’s my lucky night.” You couldn’t help but wink at him and even in the low light you saw the way his cheeks instantly flushed pink. 
Usually in your line of work, exotic dancing, not stripping, thank you very much, the men you were paid to dance for were older, usually kind of creepy. Admittedly none of the younger men at the table were bad on the eyes, but this one was especially handsome, even if he was absolutely pertrided. 
“What’s your name, stud?” You placed one hand on your hip and the other you held out for him to shake. 
You saw him swallow, taking a sip of his drink as if to lubricate his mouth so he could speak. 
“S-Spencer.” He took your hand and shook it. It was warm and so much larger than your own, even if it was a little sweaty. 
“Nice to meet you, S-Spencer.” You teased, hoping to ease some tension but it seemed to have the opposite effect. 
He shrunk in on himself, grimacing a little and looking as though he would quite literally rather be anywhere else in the world. 
“You too.” His voice jumped several octaves. 
Most of the rest of the team watched in amusement at Spencer’s discomfort, all of them aside from Emily who had wandered off to watch a redhead dance, tossing dollar bills at her and Luke who although was still seated, clearly had his eyes on the blonde on the podium in front of them. 
“So, shall we get to the good stuff?” You asked him now and he almost choked on his drink. 
“G-good stuff?” His eyes widened in terror.
“Your friends here paid for you to have a private birthday dance. They didn’t tell you?” 
Spencer clenched his jaw and turned to his friends, anger leaching from his eyes.
“I would like to go on record and say I did not invest any money in this particular endeavour.” Hotch was quick to speak up.
“This is just from me and Alvez. Happy birthday, stud.” Morgan winked at him.
If Spencer was a violent man, he would have wrung Morgan’s neck, maybe bashed his and Luke’s heads together until they lost consciousness. He was fairly certain after all his years on the job he could murder them both and get away with it. 
Maybe if you hadn’t been there, standing over him and looking so goddamn delicious in his favourite colour as well, he might have given the two men an ear full. But it wasn’t the time or place and so he swallowed his anger, keeping it bottled up until later and turning back to you. 
“Let’s just…get this over with.” Spencer stood up, grabbing his glass and the full bottle of champagne, god knows he was going to need it, and following you towards one of the curtained off areas. 
You held the curtain back for him to enter first and he did so without letting himself think about what was going to happen when the two of you were alone. The private room was much the same as the main room, only smaller with no bar. There was another plush golden couch in the centre, a smaller raised platform with a pole on the far wall. The wallpaper was a deep, cherry red, swirled with black and a gold chandelier hung from the ceiling offering, once again, very little light. 
Spencer could only assume he was supposed to sit, so slightly reluctantly he dragged his pathetic ass to the couch and sat in the centre of it. He downed the remains of his champagne before swiftly uncorking the bottle. You couldn’t help the way your body reacted to his large, veiny hand expertly pulling the cork from the bottle, like it was the easiest thing in the world. You shuddered a little at the thought of what else his hands might be capable of. 
He discarded the glass on the floor and opted instead to drink straight from the bottle, not something Spencer would ever usually do, but this whole night was so out of the ordinary for him, he decided to just lean into it. You came and stood in front of him, hands on your hips as you looked down on him.
“Not big into sharing?” You smirked at him.
“You…I assumed because you were working…”
You chuckled, reaching out and taking the bottle from his hands and taking a hefty sip. You felt the bubbles tickle the back of your throat and branch out towards your brain.
“I can indulge a little, as long as I don’t get off my face. Besides, the alcohol helps when the customer is particularly…” you searched for the right word. “Old. Ugly. Generally gross.” 
Spencer frowned at you, processing your words. 
“I guess Alvez and Morgan didn’t spring for the package where you pretend to be nice to me.” He tried to not sound as pathetic as he felt but failed miserably.
To his surprise you giggled in response, handing him back the champagne.
“Trust me, stud, you’re one customer I don’t need to drink to have fun with.” You winked at him and heard a little whimper leave his lips. He tried to cover it up by drinking more.
“Fuck,” he mumbled against the bottle top. “Let’s just…I don’t suppose we can just sit here and pretend you gave me a lap dance?” 
“Not a chance.” You smiled, sauntering on your heels over to the stereo setup in the corner. You hit play and music pulsed into the room through the speakers situated in each corner. Spencer woefully recognised the song as 50 Cent’s Candy Shop, he’d heard Morgan listen to it on more than a few occasions over the years.
You strutted back over to him, wiggling your hips to the music as you went. Spencer tried to keep his eyes trained on the bottle as he drank, refusing to let himself look at you. You made it back over to him and once again took the bottle from his hands. You sipped from it delicately, bending over to place it on the floor, ensuring to give Spencer a show of your ass as you did so. 
A low hiss left his lips, probably at the realisation you were wearing a thong. God you were going to enjoy this. 
You stood back up and started swaying to the music, stepping between his open legs. He looked up at you through frightened doe eyes, the most beautiful shade of brown you’d ever seen. His long, messy curls fell in his face and his pouty bottom lip was too kissable for words. You shook that thought off as fast as you could.
You turned you away from him, thinking it easier if you didn’t look at his gorgeous face. You knew his eyes went straight to your bare ass, you could practically feel his gaze on you. 
“You can touch me, Spencer, just nowhere inappropriate please.” Really you wanted those hands to touch you everywhere inappropriate but that kind of behaviour was frowned upon within the walls of the club. 
“I’m…I’m good.” He croaked.
You smiled to yourself as you slowly lowered yourself into his lap, perching at first on his knees before wiggling backwards. 
Spencer gasped loudly as your ass settled into his crotch and without even looking at him you knew he would be one hundred shades of red. 
It certainly wasn’t the first time a man had gotten hard when you’d given them a lap dance and you knew it wouldn’t be the last. It may well be the first time you’d enjoyed it though. 
“Jesus Christ.” He whimpered, your back now flush with his chest, his breath tickling the back of your neck. “I am so, so sorry. This is humiliating.” 
“Don’t be embarrassed.” You grinded against him in time to the music. “I know I am attractive and I am also half naked. Honestly, I’d be a little offended if you weren’t excited by that.” 
“Right. Right.” Spencer nodded, wishing he could reach the champagne bottle. “So uh…how does one get into this line of work? Stripping.” 
He needed to try and take his mind off of how unfathomably good you felt rolling your ass against his dick. 
“I’m not a stripper.” You chided him, pinching his knee with your long acrylic nails as punishment. “I’m an exotic dancer. I don’t take my clothes off. Well, no more so than this.” 
He grumbled at the pain you inflicted on his leg but the pleasure more than outweighed it. 
“Apologies, I hope I wasn’t out of line.” 
“It’s ok, it’s a common misconception. And I started working here to help pay my student loans. I stayed because I love what I do.” You grinded particularly hard against him and he whimpered against your neck. 
“You went to college?” He sounded surprised. 
“Yes, I’m not some bimbo, stud.” You rolled your eyes, another common misconception.
“Sorry.” He clenched his jaw, his cock twitching dangerously in his pants. “What uh, what did you study?” 
“Psychology.”
“No kidding?” He sounded genuinely impressed. “You have a degree in psychology and you work here?” 
You suddenly turned around, kneeling over Spencer, one leg hooked over each of his thighs. His eyes were wide as he stared at you, swallowing thickly. 
“Look, you’re cute but don’t talk to me like I’m some kind of moron and try to make me feel like working here makes me less of a person.” You reached and gripped his jaw, digging your fake nails into his stubbly cheeks.
“I…I didn’t mean it like that, I-“
“I choose to work here.” You cut him off, lowering yourself so you were seated in his lap, straddling him. “I enjoy working here. It gives me a sense of power, I’m choosing to show off my body, to turn men like you into pathetic messes.” 
Spencer moaned, didn’t even try to disguise it. You let go of his face and went to stand up but Spencer surprised you when his hands flew to your hips, gripping you firmly and keeping you in place. 
“I didn’t mean it like that.” He spoke, for the first time sounding close to confident. “You’re stunning and clearly good at your job.” He nodded down to his crotch and how he was straining against his slacks. “I didn’t mean to sound patronising or anything like that. I was merely trying to make conversation and I’m sorry if I upset you. But quite frankly, Y/N, if I don’t keeping talking I’m going to do something really fucking stupid.” 
You narrowed your eyes on him, stilling your movements as the music came to end. He kept his grip on your hips and you found yourself a little dizzy by the firmness in which he held you. 
“Stupid like what?” Your chest heaved with heavy breaths and Spencer’s eyes briefly flicked down and he hissed again at the sight. 
“Something that could probably get you fired, and neither of us wants that.” He grinded up against you this time and a soft moan left your lips. 
“Jesus,” you whined, the tables well and truly turned. “Can you just…I don’t know…give me a clue?” 
Spencer chuckled a little, moving one hand from your hip to the back of your neck and tugging you closer to him. His lips were close to your ear, ghosting over the skin. It was like a switch had been flipped, the shy and awkward guy who hadn’t even wanted a lap dance was gone, replaced by this confident and self-assured man now beneath you. 
His breath fanned across the side of your face and when he spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper. 
“Let’s just say it would involve both of us wearing a lot less clothes and you screaming my name.” 
You whimpered like a dog that had just been kicked and attempted to clamp your legs together but his were in the way. Suddenly he dropped both of his hands to his sides and looked at you darkly. 
“Get up.” He commanded you and you were dumb to do anything by comply. 
“I need to go.” He stood up, snatching up the bottle of champagne. “Thanks for that.” 
You watched him scurry away, seemingly reverting back to the shy creature he’d been initially. He fled back through the curtain, leaving you with an intense heat between your legs. 
Goddamnit, you swallowed, trying to compose yourself. I might have just found my kryptonite. 
***
Two weeks passed and Spencer couldn’t stop thinking about you. Every time he closed his eyes he saw you sitting in his lap, that goddamn purple lingerie glowing against your skin. It never failed to make him painfully hard in a matter of seconds and he’d spent more time than he could count masturbating over thoughts of you the last two weeks.
Eventually he couldn’t keep himself away if he tried. Emily had given them the weekend off and sitting alone in his apartment on Saturday night, his limbs had moved without the forethought to do so. And of course he’d ended up outside Blue Siren. 
He paid the cover charge and saw himself inside, ambling over to the bar and ordering himself a scotch. He watched the room, in a way he was trained to do, watching and waiting for a glimpse of you. 
He’d gotten down three drinks before finally he saw you across the room. His cock twitched almost instantly. Today you wore a crimson red lace teddy with shoes to match. He preferred the purple, liked it when you had more skin on display, but you still looked like a fallen fucking angel. An incredibly sexy fallen angel. 
He finished the remains of his drink and set the glass down on the bar before heading your way. 
As soon as you saw him, you couldn’t help the way your whole face lit up. He looked much the same as he had last time in his smart shirt and slacks but today he’d bypassed the cardigan and had his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. 
“Stud, you came back.” You smirked at him, placing one hand on your hip. 
“Can we talk?” 
“I’m on the clock.” You shrugged. “My time has to be paid for.”
Spencer rolled his eyes and fished his wallet out of his pocket, flashing a large wad of bills. He pulled one out and stuffed it in your hand.
“How much will a hundred get me?” 
You looked down at the bill wide eyed, seeing it was actually a hundred dollars. You looked back at him with a smile.
“At least a few dances.” You turned on your heels and motioned for him to follow you towards the private room you’d occupied a few weeks ago. 
Once inside you watched him get comfortable on the couch.
“You sure you just want to talk? I can dance and talk at the same time, I’m just that good.” You winked at him.
“N-no.” He shook his head. “No dancing, please?”
“Fine.” You chuckled, coming over and sitting next to him on the couch. “What’s up? Must be important if you’re willing to drop a C-Note on me.” 
“I uh, I wanted to apologise for my conduct the other week. It was very unlike me and I wanted you to know I’m sorry.” His cheeks flushed.
“Hmm.” You mused. “See, I don’t think it was unlike you. I think you allowed yourself to be completely authentic in that moment, letting out a side of yourself you don’t normally let people see.” 
“That psych degree is paying off, I see.” His lip twitched into a small smirk.
“I’m right, aren’t I?” 
“People see me a certain way.” He sighed a little as he spoke. “I’m the smart one, the bookish, awkward one. I’ve been seen that way for as long as I can remember. I guess I grew out of it but no one around me sees that. So maybe I play up the persona a little because it's what’s expected of me.” He confessed, not sure why he was doing so but you oddly put him at ease.
“Yeah, I get that. Sometimes it's easier to play into the expected, to fall into the roles people assign us rather than forge our own identity. You know, I only got my degree to prove I could. I wanted to prove, even if only to myself, that there was more to me than people expected of me. One day I might do something with it but for now, I really do love my job. But now I know I could do something else if I chose to.” You were equally surprised by your honesty. 
“My friends brought me here because they think I’m some kind of pathetic sad sack that can’t get laid.” He chuckled wistfully. 
“Oh but I bet you have no problem in that department, from what I could tell.” Maybe you leant closer to him, you certainly didn’t mean to, but you were sure he was closer now.
“I do alright.” The glint in his eyes told you he did better than alright and why did that cause a rumble of jealousy in your chest? 
This time it was him that leaned closer to you, his large hand finding your thigh. You felt your chest tighten at the way it felt.
“I’m not going to sleep with you.” You spoke but you didn’t particularly believe your own voice. 
“Not here, certainly not.” He inched his hand higher and you didn’t stop him.
“Not here, not anywhere.” 
“Tell yourself that all you want, princess.” He growled the last word, eliciting a whimper from your lips. 
“I don’t sleep with customers. Full stop.” 
“You sleep with me, I promise I will never come back here.” He dared edge his hand higher, now right at the top of your thigh.
“You should leave.” You said, but you didn’t move or push him away. 
“I just paid you a hundred dollars, I’m not going anywhere.” He squeezed your thigh, his fingers digging into your flesh. 
“Maybe I did prefer it when you were shy.”
“No you didn’t.” He smiled in a knowing way. And he was right. “Let me take you out, show you what I’m really like.” 
You swallowed, god how you would love that. But no. You couldn’t succumb. 
“Not gonna happen.” You took hold of his hand and forcibly removed it from your thigh. You removed the bill he’d given you from where you’d tucked it in the side of your panties and tossed it at him. “Keep your money. Leave before I call security.” 
Spencer chuckled to himself, shaking his head and placing the note on the couch, leaving it there as he stood up. 
“I’m not a threat, you don’t need to call security.” He held his hands up in defeat. “I think you know as well as I do that there's something between us, I just don’t know why you won’t admit to it. But whatever, I’ll go.” 
He went to move past you but as he did, his fingers circled your wrist. He turned your hand over and forcibly put his business card in your open hand. 
“In case you change your mind, princess.” With that he was gone, leaving your legs shaking in his wake. 
You looked down at the card in your hand and frowned to yourself as you read the words adorned on it. 
Doctor Spencer Reid. FBI. 
Huh. That was an interesting turn of events. 
***
Spencer didn’t return to the club again, respecting your boundaries and just holding onto a small glimmer of hope that you would call. But weeks passed and you never did. 
In all honesty, he wasn’t that surprised. He expected you’d tossed the card the minute he’d walked through that curtain and never given him a second thought. 
He didn’t often allow himself to get close to people for this very reason. When Spencer fell for someone it happened fast and hard and now you were the only thing he could think of and it was tearing him in two. 
It was Morgan and Luke’s fault. Them and their dumb idea to take him to a strip club for his birthday. He decided his next birthday was cancelled, the one after that too. Screw it, all his birthdays were cancelled indefinitely. 
Thankfully due to the BAU’s heavy caseload and him teaching classes at Marlborough University, he didn’t have a whole lot of time to dwell on you, which was for the best. 
He’d just have to resign himself to being alone again. Just like always. 
***
For weeks that card felt like it was burning a hole in your pocket. You didn’t intend on calling Spencer, but you just couldn’t get rid of it. There was something different about him, something that begged you to get to know him. But you had to resist temptation, it would only end badly like it always did. 
Still, you couldn’t help but picture his face when you gave an old, sad man a lap dance, wishing it were him instead. It never failed to send chills down your spine when you thought of the way his persona had flipped from shy and slightly nerdy, to suddenly so self assured. 
But you had to stop thinking about him. Thinking about him was fruitless. But of course you couldn’t, because like it or not, you were going to see him again. 
You’d almost considered pulling out of the class, as soon as you’d seen his name on the business card you knew it would be a bad idea to go through with it. But you’d been excited about this for months and you really didn’t want to wait another semester to take it. You just had to hope you could get through it without incident, however unlikely that seemed. 
“Ok, let's take a moment now to discuss the difference between a trigger and a stressor. A trigger is a sensory event experienced by an offender that precipitates subsequent behaviour whereas a stressor is a longer term pattern of behaviour or circumstances which push a person into behaving differently than they normally would. You might want to write this down. I probably shouldn’t be telling you guys this but I’m definitely putting this on the final.”
You watched the brunette a few rows in front of you coyly tell Professor Reid she was simply auditing the class. You couldn’t help but smirk when an array of other beautiful girls raised their hands when he asked who else was auditing. He was the youngest, best looking professor on campus, it was no surprise his class had drawn in a crowd of young girls to fawn over him. 
“Uh…ok.” He shook his head, checking his watch. “Unfortunately that is all the time we have for today. Thank you guys.”
You stayed seated while the rest of the class filtered out, watching him collect a stack of papers and put them in his worn satchel before turning to erase the writing on the whiteboard. You stuffed your laptop away and crept down the stairs towards the front of the class, fingers toying with the small white piece of card.
“What was your stressor, Professor? Or should I say, Doctor?” 
You saw his back go rigid and for a moment or two he didn't move a muscle. He set the whiteboard eraser down and slowly turned around as you waved his business card at him. He couldn’t help the way his eyes raked up and down your body, clad in jeans and a t-shirt, more than he was used to seeing on you. He still thought you looked like a goddamn angel.
“Uh, I’m sorry, what?” He frowned, clearly at a loss for words. 
“You said a stressor is a longer term pattern of behaviour or circumstances which push a person into behaving differently than they normally would. When I first met you, you behaved differently than you normally would, am I right? Pretending to be this shy, awkward little thing.” You quipped your eyebrow at him.
“For the record I wasn’t pretending. It wasn’t some kind of ruse or something. I am generally shy and awkward. But I have learnt to assert myself when I need to, for instance, when I see something I want. I got carried away that night at the club and I’m sorry for that, that was out of character for me.” He leant back against the edge of the desk and perched on it. “Why are you in my class, Y/N?”
“I signed up for this class before I met you. I didn’t even know you were the professor until you gave me your card.” You shrugged a little nervously. 
You were more uncomfortable in normal social settings. At the Blue Siren, where you commanded the room, the confidence oozed for you. But in the real world you were much uncomfortable in your own skin. 
“You want to be a profiler?” He scrutinised you with his gaze.
“Maybe someday. I told you, I don’t necessarily want to work at the club forever, I want options.”
“But you love your job.” He repeated what you’d told him.
“I do.” You nodded. “If this is going to be weird I can drop out. I can go to Georgetown next semester, although their professor is not a legit FBI agent with the BAU.” You chuckled a little.
“Why would it be weird?” 
“Because,” you shrugged. “Since the second you turned around and saw me standing here, you’ve been undressing me with your eyes.” 
Spencer smiled, a hint of a blush gracing his cheeks.
“I have, it's true.” He agreed. “I can’t help it if I’ve already seen so much of it.” 
“I don’t think you should want to sleep with your students.” 
“There’s no rule against it.” He chuckled, pushing himself back to his feet. “My students are all over the legal age, if I was to sleep with one of them, it would be completely consensual and no rules would be broken.”
“You’re talking from experience.” You stated and his eyes playfully glistened.
“Maybe.” He shrugged but his face said it all. “I told you, I do alright.” 
“Well, I can tell you for a fact I won’t be one of them.” 
“And that’s your loss.” He turned his back on you now and started gathering up his things, slinging his satchel over his head. “Excuse me, I have papers to grade.” 
You watched him saunter away, leaving you standing there in confusion and a little turned on if you were honest. He shoved open the door and exited the classroom and before you could think it through you were following hot on his heels. You caught up to him in the corridor as he was unlocking his office door. He spotted you in his peripheral vision.
“My office hours are on Wednesday.” He pushed open the door. “If you need something you can come…”
He trailed off when you pushed past him, entering his office ahead of him. He frowned and followed you inside, closing and locking the door behind him. 
“What?” He sighed, taking off his bag and dropping it in the chair next to the door. “You asked me to leave the club that night and I did. I gave you my number, I left the ball in your court and you didn’t call and that’s fine. I walked away! So why are you pursuing me?” 
“I won’t give it up.” You blurted out, causing a heavy frown to form on Spencer’s face.
“Give up what?” Had he missed a part of the conversation?
“The club, I love my job.”
“I know you do.” His frown deepened. “Why would you have to give it up?”
“Do you know how many men I meet that think I’m some kind of damsel in distress that needs saving? They swoop in, on their fucking white horse and think they can rescue the poor, broken stripper.”
“Exotic dancer.” Spencer corrected you with a smirk. You huffed somewhat childishly. 
“Whatever. They think they can change me. Men always think I’m some kind of fucking damsel in distress that needs saving from the big bad world of strip…exotic dancing. That’s why I don’t date customers, not because it's not allowed. I’ve made the mistake before and it always ends the same. So stop looking at me like you want to fuck me, because its never going to happen!” 
Spencer simply looked at you curiously while you ranted, voice getting louder with each syllable. Confusingly he was smiling when you finished.
“Can I speak now?” He had a hint of amusement in his eyes.
“If you have to.” You rolled your eyes. 
Spencer took a few steps away from the door and you felt yourself growing weaker the closer he got to you. He was magnetic, you couldn’t help but gravitate towards him.
“Correct me if I’m wrong but I’m certain I never once said that I have any kind of issue with your profession and I certainly never asked you to quit. Am I right?” 
“Y-yes.” You swallowed, catching the scent of his cologne. 
“If you’ve found something you love I would never dream of keeping you from that. Honestly, I admire you. It takes a lot of bravery and a lot of confidence to do what you do and god…you do it so well. Why would I ever want to take that from you?” He was so close now and you were begging him to touch you even though it was a bad idea.
“I…I don’t know.” 
“Yes, princess, you do.” He smirked. “You made an assumption about me, the same way I admittedly did when I first met you. But I was wrong and I acknowledged that. It’s only fair for you to do the same.” 
He raised his hand and your legs shook before he even touched you, at the sheer anticipation of it. It came up to cup your jaw, firmly enough that you could feel his fingers squeezing your jawbone. 
“Y-you don’t want to change me?” You whimpered.
“Why mess with perfection?” He bowed his head, his lips so close to yours you could feel the heat radiating off of them. “I’m no knight in shining armour, Y/N, I’m not rushing in to try and save you. And you are most certainly not a damsel in distress. You are a strong, independent woman and I would be lucky to merely exist in your orbit.” 
You mewled, trying to move closer to him, to crash your lips against his but he held you firmly in place, chuckling at your eagerness. For the first time in a long time you felt all your bravado melt away, all the confidence you had on stage at the Blue Siren was washed away, leaving you a trembling mess in front of this man. And normally that kind of vulnerability would cause you to run for the hills. But being vulnerable with Spencer didn’t seem all that bad.
“Can you,” you swallowed, eyes glued on those pouty lips of his. “Please…just kiss me already, stud.” 
Spencer laughed and for a moment you thought he might not comply. But then he closed the small space between you and you finally got to feel those pillowy lips pressing against yours. He gripped the back of your neck firmly, keeping you in place, as if you would go anywhere. 
Maybe one day Spencer would thank Morgan and Luke for the birthday present, this was one he’d surely cherish, as long as you would let him. 
Oh, isn't this exactly where you'd like me?
I'm exactly where you'd like me, you know.
Praying for love and a lap dance,
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innytoes · 26 days ago
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"Sure I'm a little stupid, but that's like 80% of my charm!" Is such a Reggie line
Everyone knew that Reggie was a huge flirt. It was fun! There were a lot of cool and pretty people in the world, and he enjoyed letting them know that. He gave fans T-shirts 'size beautiful', he complimented cool haircuts, he made people at parties giggle with his cheesy pick-up lines.
It never really went anywhere, of course. Sure, sometimes the handsome barista would give him extra whipped cream, or they'd get some new follows on social media for the band, or he'd make out with a cute girl for half an hour before they never saw one another again.
But that did mean he was the only single person in their group. Alex and Willie had the most romcom meet-cute ever, literally crashing into one another. Luke and Julie were basically soulmates, anyone could see that. Hell, even Flynn and Carrie finally figured themselves out, going from friends to enemies to lovers.
And then there was Reggie. Goofy, flirty, fun Reggie, who was great for a one night stand but not much more, apparently. He tried to let his friends set him up. (Kayla was great but came out as a lesbian the following week, which was... something.) He tried the apps, even the shady kinky one. He tried going to cool events, concerts, nerdy meet ups. Nothing stuck. Or should he say, nobody stuck around.
He tried not to let it get him down, but after the umpteenth time of getting ghosted, he was wallowing on Alex and Willie's couch, feeling sorry for himself.
"I mean, I'm not hideous or anything!" he ranted, playing with one of the dozens of fidget toys Willie had lying around. "Sure I'm a little stupid, but that's like 80% of my charm!"
"Plenty of people in LA who are himbosexual," Willie nodded sagely, as if he wasn't one of them.
"I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. That girl from the club we played last week, she seemed to really like me. She even asked what I played as in my current D&D campaign. And then knew what I meant!" he whined, pressing the heels of his hands against his eyes. "A pretty D&D playing punk rock girl gave me her number and then didn't respond to any of my four texts. Not even the puppy gif! And if I send any more I'm a creep!"
"Oh for..." Alex said, annoyed. "Do you think maybe she hasn't texted back because the second you even thought Julie said your name you turned to her like a lovesick puppy?"
"Alex," Willie warned.
"Or maybe because you talk about Luke and Julie like they hung the moon, the stars, and invented pizza?"
"I don't... I talk about the whole band," Reggie said, even as he thought back. Okay, maybe he had mentioned Luke and Julie more often, but only because they wrote the songs. And yeah, when Julie said his name, of course he checked in with them. Maybe it was time to go.
And yeah, maybe he thought Julie was the prettiest girl in the entire universe, but she was dating Luke. (The hottest dude in the entire universe.) They were happy together, so Reggie tried to be happy for them. He just needed to find someone that made him that happy, too.
Right?
"Reggie," Alex said, grabbing his hand. He looked serious. "The reason you can't keep a date is because you're totally in love with Luke and Julie. And they look at you the same way."
"What?" he stared at Alex. "Like, for real?"
"Yes!" Alex said, looking a little fed up, but mostly very soft. Because he cared about Reggie. Even if he was like 80% a himbo.
He thought back to all the times Luke and Julie had invited him along with them on dates, on how they always plopped next to him (or even better, on either side of him) for movie nights. How they never passed up an opportunity to share a mic with him, giving him a head nod to come over, or holding it out to him.
How every time they sang together, sparks flew.
"Oh. Oh!"
"Finally," Alex groaned.
"Wait, why did you try to stop him?" Reggie asked Willie, betrayed.
"I had five bucks riding on you figuring it out yourself," Willie said, unrepentant.
"I'll make it up to you," Alex said, rolling his eyes. To Reggie, he said: "Now get off my couch and go get 'em, tiger."
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imaginarianisms · 4 months ago
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my& hands are folded. lil review. like. okay. i& didnt think this episode was terrible or anything but there's. a few things that annoyed me. like i figured this was coming but the ..... whole merging of rhaena & nettles (who doesnt exist in the show for whatever reason) plotlines as if they're not completely different characters & acting as if theyre interchangeable just bc they're both black girls & jeyne arryn's lesbianism erasure. yknow. just like they took away rhaena & elissa's whole thing in f&b w/ taking dreamfyre who was the mother of daenerys' three dragons & elissa's whole dynamic w/ rhaena who're canonically lesbians & were together & instead making syrax the mother of those dragons when drogon, rhaegal & viserion dont look like syrax At All and the fact that dreamfyre being the mother of daenerys' dragons is that. thats the One Thing that connected helaena (& the rest of the greens by extension) to daenerys who helaena dreams of & they took that away from her to give to rhaenyra who already Has a bunch of parallels (& antiparallels) to daenerys, she doesn't need more of them & on top of that it would make helaena matter more to the storyline.
& also like ....... ok. in the books corlys was Furious at rhaenyra for a bit & that only seemingly got resolved in one episode?? idk man i dont buy that. rhaenyra's allowed to grieve luke (which is. obviously more than justified) but corlys cant spend more than one episode grieving his WIFE FOR DECADES???? also in the books daemon never Once tried to usurp rhaenyra or challenge her claim to the iron throne ever. like dgmw i love the scenes w/ young rhaenyra, viserys (& w/ aemma hiiiiiii aemma rip bbygirl u shouldve been at the club) but like he's Still stuck at harrenhal. like cmon.
also uh. alicent & ESPECIALLY helaena were well loved by the smallfolk? like canonically yes the common people are angry that there's no food but they NEVER attacked or blamed HELAENA for it, it was the fact that jaehaerys died that the smallfolk were FURIOUS w/ rhaenyra & the blacks & even moreso when helaena dies. like. helaena was BELOVED by the common people, she wasn't attacked in the streets.
on the more positive side of things im glad we got to see viserys again bc paddy's acting is just. literally so phenomenal. larys' whole monologue w/ aegon had me evaporating. aemond calling larys a toad made me gigglesnort im so sorry larys. rip ser darklyn u were a Real One. also rickard thorne is there hiiiiiii ser rickard. i'm glad we got to hear of daeron but imo he shouldve been mentioned a lot earlier. i'm glad we got to see some alicent & gwayne scenes bc their dynamic's rly sweet i think. gwayne told alicent what she needed to hear: "i'm sure you did your best". which. sadly is true, she did her best with what she had at the time (in the show anyway). mysaria's backstory was like. so hard to listen to especially as a .. well survivor myself. but like i like her even more than i already do bc its. sadly relatable in my case (not the exact same situation ofc thank g-d). i'm glad we Finally get to see rhaenyra kissing girls like she was implied to in the books, i just wish they'd done it a lot earlier like she's implied to have been w/ laena (& mysaria for that matter) in the books. addam & alyn i love them sm + addam's whole dynamic w/ seasmoke is so fun but like i have no idea if laenor died offscreen or not (i doubt they'd just kill him offscreen but w/e). so they'd probably have to think of some way where like idk maybe a rider can intentionally sever the bond for whatever reason idk. but also larys' monologue w/ aegon especially as a disabled & neurodivergent person myself was soooooo EUGH.
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hersterical · 2 years ago
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Interesting pattern I’ve noticed is that my enjoyment of a Mike Flanagan series seems to be proportional to how big of a role lesbians play in it. Here’s what I mean
Midnight Club
Lesbian counter: None officially confirmed that I’m aware of. (edit: forgot about Cheri, thanks bkatlips! (still semi-new to tumblr so I’m not sure how to tag people))
Verdict: I enjoyed it, but more so for the experience of watching it with my friends than anything. Would watch it again but I will not seek it out and probably wouldn’t care if I never saw it again. Sure I’m bummed that it was canceled before its’ time, but I’m not losing any sleep over it.
Midnight Mass
Lesbian counter: 1 officially who I don’t personally consider to be a main character but still plays a major role in the plot and is part of The Crew.
Verdict: Love it and I definitely need to see it at least one more time before I die, but probably not something I would recommend to people unless I know that it’s the kind of thing they’re into. I can’t remember any character’s name off the top of my head.
Haunting of Hill House
Lesbian counter: 1 main character who is also the third best character in the series (Luke and Nell are tied for first) and possibly Theo’s love interest, though I’m not sure if she’s lesbian, bi, pan, etc. (I am not counting the bridesmaid Theo hooked up with at Nell’s wedding)
Verdict: It is truly amazing. Sometimes I remember the show and I need to take a moment to re-absorb some of my thoughts and feelings I get while watching. I genuinely care about a decent chunk of the characters and it breaks my heart. I would watch it at least once a year but I don’t think my emotions can handle it. Would recommend to anyone who could handle anything scarier than Scooby Doo.
Haunting of Bly Manor
Lesbian count: ♾️ Lesbian love story masquerading as a ghost story. 2 officially confirmed (not counting that dress fitter who I’m not entirely convinced didn’t have a thing going on with Dani) and the amount of pining more than makes up for the small number. Quality over quantity.
Verdict: I am unwell. I am definitely not emotionally equipped to handle watching this show once a year but am willing to watch it multiple times a year anyway. Every single character is compelling and interesting and I care about all of them except for Peter. I lay awake at night thinking about it sometimes. It’s in my walls. If it became anymore imbedded in my brain then Viola would be pacing through my house and I would constantly be under threat of being dragged off to my watery grave. Would recommend to anyone and everyone no matter their fear threshold.
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alicecrax · 2 years ago
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random ideas for if already existing jd coaches end up reappearing in other maps
liv and blake (originally from bring me to life):
this is the reason why i made this post. i need them to return and if they do, please make the song all the things she said by t.a.t.u. i need lesbians in just dance i fucking need
(this post is rlly long and i don’t want to clog up the jd tag so click the keep reading thing if you wanna continue with my silly little ideas)
ann g. lina & luke cypher (originally from magic and disco inferno respectively)
the fact that magic and disco inferno take place at the same theatre is really cool and i really wish they did more with that. like maybe have something like save your tears but instead of love it’s just “FUCK YOU”.
unfortunately the first song that came to my mind when i originally thought of this was abcdefu by galye uhhh-
let’s just go with bad blood by taylor swift ft kendrick lamar cause that’s the best i can think of
mothigan (originally from good ones):
my girl was done kinda dirty she deserved lore who was in that coffin i need to know
idc what song she returns in, i need more lore about her, tell me everything just dance
wannabe trio & without me trio:
i think some sort of superhero duet with these coaches would be nice. something like majesty except they aren’t fighting eachother they are fighting crime together
for the song, maybe little violence by waterparks. seems like it would fit the vibe
amanita (originally from without me extreme version):
on the contrary to what the wannabe and without me coaches were doing, i wanna see amanita DO the crimes
i did something bad by taylor swift would probably work for her.
ruben and polo (originally from mood/danger high voltage):
make em gayer. that’s it. we know they’re probably gay but just make it even gayer.
beedabop (originally from heat waves) & video killed the radio star:
the two tv heads in just dance
i want them to interact with eachother bc i love them sm
idk if this song would fit the vibe but i think that i can talk by two door cinema club would be a cute song choice for them
thats all i can really think of for this one ty for reading have a nice dayy
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ghostlyplacetobe · 5 months ago
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Hey man just watch bad girls club
A lot of the girls fighting on that show helps me get my anger out idk
Like
Idk
It’s
Idk Luke but I’m sending hugs
Hugs hugs hugs
Thank you
I love watching girls fight, it brings out the lesbian in me (even though I’m bisexual)
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lesbianslovelukeclub · 4 years ago
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april 3, 2021
josh and luke recreate the swingset scene (via @/lukiemullen on tiktok)
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bambikippen · 4 years ago
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tyrustina · 5 years ago
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it’s 10 years in the future. my wedding day. i’ve just gotten married to the love of my life.
now, i sit at the reception ceremony. my wife stands up makes a toast to us and our love. it provokes an onslaught of joyful tears from our family and friends.
it’s my turn to make a toast. i stand up and the gathering looks at me expectantly, waiting to see what i will say about my wife. i raise my glass.
“to luke mullen,” i begin.
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pynkpoet · 5 years ago
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adult tv shows with [subpar] gay rep: *kills off gay character because they see senselessly desposing of them for shock factor as equality or refuses to show one despite gay subtext thrown in*
Luke Mullen, a teenager with more guts than any bland homophobic screenwriter: TJ is GAY. G-a-y. Josh and I have been sneaking little hints that TJ and Josh are in love with each other from the beginning.
It’s a really big step to expose gay rep to Disney Channel and it’s a firm affirmation that Lesbians Love Luke Club. It makes me feel safe knowing he’s so adamantly supportive of us being respected. It’s just basic human decency to respect gay people-but Luke and Josh worked so hard representing us as faceted people who deserve to be treated with kindness as anyone else too and I forever appreciate it.
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innytoes · 1 year ago
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Inny rewatches JATP 4-6
Episode 4:
-Okay so this school has: a swim team (mentioned at the rally) and lacrosse team, cheerleaders, special FURRY cheerleaders, and a marching band. Dances in the middle of the week. Who the fuck is funding this school?
-I've decided I'm going full rarepair and I ship Nick with That Poor Boy Whose Sticks Julie Steals.
-When the boys write Hello Bobby on the mirror, the y has the little Sunset Curve swoop.
Episode 5:
-Willie enjoying the show while also saying hi to all his ghost club coworker pals never stops being good.
-Having fun going through the parts I've matched a million times and noticing all the little details. Did you know the bottoms of Caleb's shoes are shiny purple? I can just see him at his desk with a bottle of shimmering nail polish.
-Also spotted some some ladies dancing together. Dante and Fuego have competition. Let's go lesbians!
-The tiniest little nod when Alex asks Caleb to let Willie know he was looking for him and you're like: GAY ACCEPTANCE. HE'S BEEN WHERE YOU ARE. MY FEELS.... and then like 5 seconds later you're reminded Caleb is still a soulstealing evil bastard.
Episode 6:
-Still not over who the hell planned a dance on a school night. Julie missed THREE CLASSES? And then all those people going to Carrie's after party... I'm sure she wasn't the only one who overslept.
-Luke and his sadness flannel and the chocolate cake and I'm not crying my eyes are just sweating.
-Ray you know I love you but babe what is that hat. Please, sir. No.
-Also it is my personal belief that Ray went to Eats and Beats to see Carrie because he knows her fucking dad won't and even though she and Julie aren't friends anymore he wants there to be an adult who supports her.
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thinkinaboutambris · 6 years ago
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Y’ALL CHECK LUKES TWITTER P L E A S E
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bambikippen · 5 years ago
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the luke mullen sect of the am fandom is thriving then
I measure the success of a fandom based on how many lesbians are in it cause they're the best content creators. lesbians run so the rest of us can walk
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dreamsandwakingthoughts · 5 years ago
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Not a complete diagram but a diagram nonetheless.
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