#leia is a lot to handle

[tennessoui]

Hi Kit, what would happen when Luke and Leia (and Rey) would bring home Han and Din (uh, Finn/Poe?) to their fathers in your various mob AUs? Would they react differently? And what would happen with the grandchildren? Instant love or no you are too young?

just thinking about playmaker au but:

bold of you to assume that luke and leia wouldn't get into an argument about who should get to keep mob smuggler!han so one of them (or anakin) (or obi-wan) (probably obi-wan) just kills han so no one gets to have him

and then din rolls up a few years later and luke is like 😍 nvm 😍 you can have the (dead) guy i don't care anymore 😍

and so din has to go through like a whole year or so of various attempts on his life from leia, anakin, and obi-wan because it's only fair

as for grandkids none of these people should have had children and we should 1000% spar the grandkids

[giveamadeuschohisownmovie]

I’m gonna be honest. The more I think about it, the more I’m believing that the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy could’ve been better than the Original Trilogy if the script was tighter (a lot tighter). But George needed to let other people handle the script and he needed way more help with bringing his vision to life.

I mean, just think about it. The OG trilogy was a fairly straightforward, good vs evil storyline. Jedi and Rebels good, Emperor and Sith bad. Amazing storyline, but fairly simple. In comparison, the Prequel trilogy is far more complex in terms of what it was trying to achieve. If you look past the shitty dialogue and questionable storyline choices, the story that George came up with deals with:

1) Duty vs. Desire (Anakin trying to remain a Jedi but wanting to pursue Padme)

2) Questioning the Jedi Code instead of just blindly accepting it as gospel. Because despite how much Anakin was struggling with his complicated emotions, the Order doesn’t notice. In fact, the Order encouraged him to bury his emotions, which we see led to disaster since that led him right to the Dark Side.

3) An actual attempt at more complex politics rather than just evil empire versus good resistance. For example, it’s a meme that Anakin made an argument in favor of fascism, but in the hands of a better writer, that could’ve been a really good moment. We get an idea of why the Empire would have its supporters, despite being the obvious bad guys. It humanizes the Empire in a way that it doesn’t make you sympathize with them, but makes you understand how someone could end up on that path. That’s more true to life than just evil people being evil. (Andor is probably the one Star Wars media that understood this, which is partly why it’s one of the best Star Wars content out there)

4) The hero is genuinely a tragic character. He’s a child prodigy who was freed from slavery with the promise of a better life. But as he grows up, he becomes frustrated with how his life is turning out. He’s powerful, but not powerful enough to save his mom. He falls in love, but can’t be with Padme since it’s against the Jedi Code. Obi-Wan looks over him, but Anakin doesn’t feel he’s respected. The Order assigns him dangerous mission after dangerous mission, but he doesn’t get the rank of master. Anakin’s arc is about a man who feels like he’s not in control of his life (which is doubly sad when you remember he grew up in slavery) and, in his lowest moment, turns to a man who claims to be able to give Anakin everything he’s ever wanted. And that becomes his downfall since he ends up losing way more than he gained.

I’m sorry, but, that storyline is way more interesting than Luke and Leia’s story. No offense to Luke and Leia, but their dad’s story sounds like a Shakespearean tragedy. What messed it up was that George Lucas needed someone else to write the script.

[dailydragon08]

I'd love to read about the Falcon gang realizing Luke has a crush on you, and I'm clumsily trying to hide it from them

I love this prompt so much, thank you for the ask! Sorry this one got away from me a little bit, I just really love writing about Luke with a crush/pining Luke.

My masterlist is linked in the pinned post on my page! Don’t forget, if you like the fic, reblogs are greatly appreciated!

Let’s start with Luke and what he’s doing. I don’t know if I would say he’s really going out of his way to try and “hide” his crush from you specifically, per se, but he’s also not shouting it from the rooftops. I could see all eras of Luke not really minding if you figure it out, just so you could maybe talk about it and see if being together is something you’d be interested in. But all eras of him tread a bit carefully at first (in my mind, ESB Luke is the most bold while ROTJ Luke is the most careful), just doing little things or sometimes purposefully giving little hints here and there to kind of test the waters and see how you react, if you like what he’s doing, if you’re starting to get more comfortable around him, etc. But oh boy, does he really want to hide it from the Falcon Gang – at least until he figures out how you feel and what path you’re taking forward. For one, he doesn’t want to annoy or burden them by constantly talking/asking about you, and for another, he wants to take things at his own pace and doesn’t want any of them to try and interfere to speed things up lest you get spooked and run the other direction. The older he is, the more he also worries about how being with him could put a target on your back and wants to make sure you can protect yourself and/or he’s able to protect you.

How clumsily he hides his crush on you would really depend on the era that he’s in. ANH Luke is the most likely to trip over himself, get caught most often staring at you with the biggest puppy eyes, and is always the first to rush forward and help you with something with an excited “I’ve got it!” He’s also most likely to let a compliment slip out that he thought was only in his head, then look a bit like a deer in the headlights when he realizes that was out loud. Once the rest of the gang figures it out, this era of Luke will talk the most openly (not completely spilling every thought in his brain, but just the most willing to talk at all about it) and ask the most questions about whether or not you’ve said anything to them or given them any clues as to your feelings.

ESB Luke is, like I’ve said in previous posts, a bit better about hiding his feelings, but it’s very obvious to those who know him. He still gets caught staring at you often and isn’t the best at looking away before you make eye contact with him. Now that he’s got more combat and Force-related skills under his belt, he’s a bit more protective of you (he always was, but now even more so because of his newfound confidence and rank) and is the most prone to jealousy out of his three eras. I could see both ANH and ESB versions of him going out of their way to try and impress you (and sometimes comically failing) if it seems like someone else is trying to catch your attention. Once he’s found out, he’s a bit more close-lipped, but will admit to liking you and being unsure how you feel about him. He’ll talk for a few minutes at a time about all the things he likes about you before saying he’d just like to take it slow and see where this whole thing naturally goes, but then that’s the end of the conversation.

ROTJ/post-ROTJ Luke is a bit more settled in who he is as a person, what’s happened to him, and who his father is, but he’s still going through a lot. How he handles his crush will really depend on exactly where in ROTJ he is. Between saving Han, finishing his training with Yoda and staying by his deathbed, finding out Leia is his sister, and knowing there’s a strong possibility that he’ll die facing Vader and the emperor, he’s got a ton on his shoulders. For this reason, I could see him becoming more distant because – despite still having strong feelings for you – he’s afraid to get involved and then leave you heartbroken if something happens to him. That, along with Obi-Wan’s ghost telling him to “bury his feelings deep down” and honor the original order’s no attachment rule, he’s also a bit confused on what his future will even look like and if having a crush will even be an avenue open to him. It’s my personal headcanon that post-ROTJ, as he learns more about who he is, the kind of jedi he wants to be, the kind of order he wants to cultivate, and the importance of connection and how it’s different than possession, he decides to do away with the no attachment rule and make teaching about connection (healthy) vs. possession (unhealthy) part of the jedi training. He did save his father because of their attachment, after all. So this era of Luke is the most likely to let himself really experience a crush and falling in love for the first time, in my opinion. He takes things slow and still gives you little hints here and there vs. big, grand gestures – but he also is doing things with the intent of letting you know how he feels while patiently waiting for you to either return the gestures/initiate a talk about your feelings whenever you’re ready, or is watching for signs that you’re not into what he’s doing. He’ll be sad, of course, but he’ll respect your wishes.

Whew, okay, I didn’t realize I had so much to say, sorry. Moving on…

Leia is the first to realize what’s going on. Even if she hasn’t realized she’s Luke’s twin or Force-sensitive yet, she’s always been very in tune with him. If she knows you well, she’s shipping the two of you much earlier in the process and practically banging her head into a wall when Luke says he’s unsure if you return his feelings when to her, it couldn’t be more obvious. In this case, she wants so badly for him to just be direct about his feelings so you can make use of every second you have in your crazy lives, but she lets him make his own decisions. If she doesn’t know you that well, she’s keeping her eye on you to determine whether your interest in him is genuine and not just because of his fame, power, and accomplishments. As she gets to know you better, she comes around. In both situations, she’s doing whatever she can to play subtle wingwoman – especially with her rank within the rebellion, she’s making sure you two are on missions together as much as possible, your rooms are close to each other, you both always happen to have the same days off every time, she’s slipping little comments in to him about what your favorite things are, your hobbies, likes/dislikes, etc. If he really does want to take his time, Leia makes sure he’s armed with all the knowledge to best make use of it. Even though she’s chomping at the bit for you two to get together, she does still try to be (or at least, start out) gentle when she gives Luke advice or asks if he’d like to talk about you or his feelings, and is always combating Han’s horrible dating advice with reminders that he just do whatever comes naturally to him with what he knows about you – because at the end of the day, if you can’t like him for who he naturally is, then there’s no point to any of this.

Han’s reaction depends a bit on Luke’s age. The younger he is, the more obnoxious and frequent Han’s teasing is. Especially if it’s before he and Leia get together, he’ll make comments to Luke about whether he thinks you’d make a good SO for him, or he’ll flirt with you when it’s just the three of you just to ruffle Luke’s feathers. As they both get older and become closer though, the teasing will die down a bit to comments about how Han notices Luke’s doe eyed-stare, suggests you won’t be single forever, and of course, gives the worst dating advice that have Leia and Lando face-palming so hard in the background. Especially once Luke becomes a jedi knight, really the most he’ll get is a gentle elbow in the ribs with some wiggled eyebrows, maybe followed by some prompting to go talk to you when you’re standing/sitting alone. At the end of the day, he really does just want his friend to be happy. Like Leia, if he doesn’t know you well, he’s watching you extra closely for a bit and maybe even trying to get to know you better himself so he can determine whether you’re a good match. Despite his devil may care attitude, Han is very attentive to his friends and is aware of all the pain Luke’s been through – that being said, he doesn’t want to watch him go through potential heartbreak after all that either. Again though, like Leia, he eventually comes around and counts you as one of the Falcon gang – although he’s a bit more oblivious to when you two are having a moment and the others sometimes have to comedically yoink him out of a room before he interrupts and ruins it.

Although Lando also wants the best for Luke, he doesn’t know him or his background that well, so isn’t as protective. However, if you’re a newcomer, Lando is the most immediately welcoming of the group and can tell you’ll be a great addition – whether you and Luke get together or not. Lando is very astute when it comes to listening and watching and waiting for the right moment – so of course, he picks up on the subtle yearning glances, the slight blushes, compliments, any sort of physical affection Luke is willing to throw your way, how much more gentle he suddenly becomes with you (he was already gentle before, but he’s somehow even softer when you’re around), the way his face lights up when you walk into a room, etc. He clocks it immediately and at first, just lets it be since he doesn’t want to pry. Eventually though, when he and Luke get a moment alone, Lando makes a comment about how great you are to gage the jedi’s reaction and how willing he is to talk about it. He strikes me as a great listener and is very validating to all Luke’s feelings and concerns, but gently reminds him that someone like you won’t be single forever and does he really want to live with that regret of watching you get with someone else when he was never brave enough to really make a move? After this conversation, he immediately goes to Leia ready to make the Ultimate Wingman Gameplan and is ready with his full resources, funds, and even wardrobe to make whatever needs to happen a success. He and Leia may or may not orchestrate some “oops, we’re stuck in x situation together” happenings, or invite you two to things like fancy Rebellion/New Republic gatherings where they split up and help the two of you get ready in ways that wow the other, etc.

Once Chewie (platonic) realizes you’re not a threat to one of his closest friends, the two of you become his OTP. He has a sneaking suspicion, but is usually busy with Han and/or fixing yet another part of the Falcon that broke, so isn’t around as much to collect evidence and the others have to fill him in. Not many people can understand his language, so there’s not really a risk of him spilling the beans. But he’s 100% doing little things here and there to meddle, like pulling you both into a giant group hug and squishing you together, pitching the Falcon while he pilots so you fall backwards into Luke’s lap, bumping into one of you so you’re now standing or sitting close together, physically pushing Luke towards you with a grumble in Shyriiwook, etc.

R2 has to be the one to explain what’s going on to C-3PO (platonic). At first, the protocol droid goes, “wait, what do you mean?” But once he figures it out, everyone has to reach to cover his mouth as he starts to cry in the middle of the busy hangar, “oh my goodness! That’s wonderful to hear that Master Luke fancies mph-hmmphh-umph-mmmm!” To be honest, no one really wanted to tell him in the first place because he’s so bad at keeping his mouth shut, but 3PO overheard some comment someone else was making and just wouldn’t stop asking questions. Cue everyone constantly covering 3PO’s mouth until you and Luke get together, as he almost makes comments and spills the secret many times – and sometimes, they just shut him off mid-sentence. He’s not allowed to be alone with you again until after the two of you get together, but when it’s just him and R2, he’s constantly raving about how he’d love for his master to be happy and how he’s using this to study what two humans who are interested in each other romantically do. Of course, he’s been programmed to know about it, but seeing it in real time is fascinating to him and is where the majority of his comments that almost get him in trouble come from.

R2-D2 (platonic), like Chewie, can’t really rat Luke out verbally – but also follows the Wookiee’s example and meddles to get you two closer faster. He even stole Chewie’s methods of bumping into one of you from behind to get you stumbling into each other’s arms and pitching the ship so Luke has to catch you before you fall. When he’s really feeling like a little shit, he’s been known to lock the two of you in tight spaces together for an extended period of time. When one of you gets injured or needs help, he always immediately rushes to find the other, even if there are other people close by who could help – and sometimes even blows things a little out of proportion just to get you two alone together. Like he’ll rush to tell Luke you’re trying to get something up from a high shelf and are about to fall and Luke runs in to find your footstool the tiniest bit wobbly, but otherwise stable while you’re not even that far off the ground.

~~

Taglist: @kaleidoscope1967eyes @masterlukessaber @coffeeorsomething-irl @eveningserenityyy @victorian-nymph @lxstfathier @rogue-kenobi @lavandula-ipsum @sonofthedunes @pomplalamoose @lex-the-flex @ilovemarkhamill

[frasier-crane-style]

You know, people complain about insincerity in media--the constant quippiness, the constant irony, the refusal to engage with tropes or characters without a fat layer of postmodern self-awareness in the way--but I actually think that's a problem in fandom too and may even have influenced the problem on the creator side, through fans working their way into companies and creators trying to engage with fandom.

You look at discussion of Star Wars, for instance, and it's just a steady stream of smart-aleckness. Leia is a disaster lesbian. Darth Vader is a drama queen. It's good to have a sense of humor about this stuff--after all, it's only a show and taking it too seriously definitely has its own set of problems--but it feels like that jokeyness has started a feedback loop between creators and audience where the fans keep taking it less seriously and TPTB keep presenting it less seriously. Until it all seems more like Regular Show than a regular show.

Fandom sees Jim Kirk, a serious-minded leader of men who is occasionally used for comic relief like any good character, and for comedic effect fixates on his womanizing and disregard for orders (only when necessary--which does admittedly come up a lot in a series full of stories being told for dramatic impact. Nothing too dramatic about Kirk following orders and completing his assignment without any trouble).

J.J. Abrams sees this pop culture snowballing of Kirk after years and decades of exaggeration and turns Chris Pine into a horny cowboy.

Fandom unfamiliar with the original series watches the reboot, assumes horny cowboy is the natural state of Captain Kirk, and exaggerates that even further for laughs.

Abrams sees that fans like when Kirk is a horny cowboy--it's all they talk about, after all--and ramps it up by having him casually breaking the Prime Directive and lying about it in the second movie (and having a threesome with alien space babes, for what it's worth).

And so it goes*. That's a pretty extreme case, because most characters don't get decades of pop culture warping their perception, but I feel like... at present, with this miscegenation between fans and creators, where people can show their fan art directly to writers on Twitter... it's exacerbated some.

There isn't that distance that used to impose a certain formality on fans and creators. And so I think the way fans view characters and canon can very easily infiltrate how the creators handle them, even without some crazed fanboy actually getting to pen a Disney+ show or Marvel comic.

Or maybe not. I just see a lot of shows and comics that seem like they want to be fandom catnip ahead of and above being a good story or even an artistic statement the creator is trying to make.

*Digression for Star Trek fans. Ignore if you're not a Trekkie.

Thankfully, I've seen some pushback against Horny Cowboy Kirk in Beyond and Strange New Worlds. Beyond I think portrayed how Horny Cowboy Kirk would chafe against the demands of captaincy and need to evolve closer to Shatner Kirk to keep going on the path he wants to be on. While SNW just shows Kirk as a dutiful, if risk-taking, officer on the fast-track to command thanks to his obvious competence and passion for the job. Which is, you know, what you'd expect from Kirk pre-TOS, but it's good they didn't overthink it and say that he was, I don't know, a drug smuggler all this time (Star Wars. Poe.)

So, credit where credit's due. It's not all bad.

[dailyreverie]

We fell in love at the end of the world

Part of the Your Wish is my Command universe

A/N: ...well this took a while didn't it? To makeup for it here's a long-ass update with like a thousand taylor swift song references because that has been my personality for the past two months. Title comes from the song with the same name by "Hozier" (Give it a listen because it has huge Poe vibes)

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Solo!Reader (fem.)

Word Count: 3.9k words

CW: A lot of feelings. Bar setting, alcohol and drunk people mentions, reader drinks alcohol, s3x mentions.

SERIES MASTERLIST

There were so many factors of why you couldn’t be with Poe that you didn’t even know where to start enlisting them. The heart-crushing feelings you had for him were becoming unmanageable; you couldn’t look at him, couldn’t speak to him, couldn’t think of him without feeling your limbs and organs moving in a giddy flutter, so you did the only thing you could do: avoid him at all costs.

It’s hard to do so, ignore your favorite person in the whole galaxy, but maybe if you did for a few weeks you could get over all those feelings… right? And yes, it’s hard to do so, even more so when you are summoned to a briefing only to find him going in at the same time.

“Hey!” Poe sounded happy when he saw you, relieved even, his features even lighting up when he looked at you after taking a double look. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

“Poe!” Damn you, Dameron, was all you wanted to say when his arms opened to greet you with a bone-crushing hug. “You know how this gets…” Your vague answer made his smile turn into a tucked-lip grin, almost as if he were disappointed by your answer.

“I know,” was all he said. “So are we both in trouble, or are we going on the same mission?” Being in trouble sounded like the better option. You couldn’t know, but Poe thought so too.

An infiltrated spy in the government had reached all the way to the Resistance, and of course, in order to give away more information, the spy needed an in-person meeting. Even knowing that, when the General told you who was assigned to the mission, that news alone terrified you more than the actual meeting.

“I’m sending you two”. You couldn’t know who was more nervous about it, you, or Poe, who kept looking at you without really knowing what to say. Your blood turned cold in your veins. You looked at Poe as he looked at you, and you both turned to look at the General. “Why?” You asked, trying to remain as cool as possible even though you felt like your knees could give up on you at any moment. You failed, clearly, since your own mother looked at you stranged at your uneasy tone. “I mean… why send two people? Isn’t this a- uhm- one-person job?” You saved yourself quickly while looking at Poe, who seemed like a lost porg with wide eyes avoiding yours.

She glared at you as if she knew more about you than you did - and she probably did. “I’m sending you because they are expecting an Organa, and I’m sending Poe as your protection.”

The General walked past you, leaving no room for protesting. All Poe did when you exchanged a look was shrug.

“Protection?” You asked after a beat, once the General had walked past you, and from the look on her face, you may have asked a bit too harshly. Poe looked down, hiding a hurt smile that twisted your insides from guilt. “What I mean is- You don’t have to send your best pilot to this mission, I can handle it on my own. It’s just intel, after all.”

“Well, then…” Leia looked between the two of you; you with your panicked eyes hiding a thousand feelings, and Poe a couple of steps behind, uncharacteristically quiet, watching it all unfold. “...then consider this a fun friend getaway, in which your friend is also there for your safety.” She patted your arm and left the room.

“Hey!” Poe called you as you began to walk outside, and as you stopped and turned around, facing each other and waiting for him to speak, you got a glimpse of the hurt from before mixed with something else, something warm; right there, all over his eyes, you remembered why you couldn’t be sent alone with him. “Are you okay?” Was all he said.

“Yeah.” You said almost instantly. “Why wouldn’t I be?” A chuckle came right after.

“You seemed a bit… I don’t know.” His voice turned to a quiet whisper at the last words, as if he were questioning his own self. “Are we good?” He sounded hurt, and you hated yourself. A nod was all you could do without giving away your almost exploding feelings.

“We’re good.” You confirmed. It wasn’t his fault, he didn't deserve to be ignored by his best friend.

Poe nodded back, convincing himself about it. “I thought you were avoiding me, I just- I wanted to make sure we were good.”

Damn. Damn him and his perceptive, smart, beautiful, brain.

“Don’t be ridiculous, I would never avoid you.” You smiled, with an apology between the lines that you hoped he would get, but a real smile after all. You can’t be away from him, it doesn’t matter how hard you try.

“Well, then I should get some rest. Can’t be easy being your personal security, I have to be well-rested.” You pushed his shoulder, scoffing at his dumb joke. You felt almost relieved to be back to laughing with him, not realizing how torturous the past couple of weeks of avoiding him had really affected you. “I’ll see you in the morning, Lieutenant.” He shouted as he turned his back to you, finally, letting you break into the enormous smile you couldn’t contain anymore.

It was going to be a hard mission.

******

In another life, this would have been the most beautiful trip. You arrived well into the afternoon, with a smooth flight with Poe as your pilot soaring you amongst the clouds of the waterfall-filled moon you were sent to. Poe and you were back to being your ridiculous selves with each other, making the job of not falling anymore for him harder.

You laughed together at Poe’s dumb comments and jokes about being your bodyguard, walking side by side along the streets lined up with stone walls that paved the way to your secret meeting. “I need you to stop looking at me, ma'am, you can’t be distracting your security guy on times like this.” He faked a deep, serious voice, failing miserably at it since his lips kept turning upwards at the sound of your laughter.

“Shut your mouth, Dameron.” You rolled your eyes, but in all honesty, you couldn’t stop looking at him. You had to lay low for the meeting, no uniforms or clothes that could give away who you were, and Poe’s choice of clothing had you mesmerized since the moment you saw him before take-off; with his hair pushed back and his relaxed white shirt that hung loosely from his shoulders while still showing the built frame that the pilot suit usually hid, you were having a hard time to focus on what had to be done. Not that it was any easy for him either, since what you had modestly called a disguise happened to show your body in a way that was giving Poe a hard time to even turn the engine of the ship on.

Sure, you were there to see a potential spy and anyone could come around the corner and attack you, but for a few hours you felt like you could forget about all that; for a few hours, it didn’t seem like you were falling in love in the middle of a war.

Meeting the spy was anything a meeting with a spy could be, or so you thought, since you had never done it by yourself before. As soon as you reached the cantina he mentioned you spotted the guy, immediately tensing as a sharp breath came in through your nose. The realization of why you were there came upon you then, when you saw the blaster hanging so freely by the guy’s hip. Thank the Maker your mother insisted on sending Poe with you, who so gently reached for your hand and squeezed it gently. “I’ll be right beside you, I got you” he whispered, nudging his head towards where he was already holding his blaster by his hips.

You were spotted and greeted with an acknowledging head tilt and a hand urging you to reach the table. “I was expecting the General, not some kid and a flyboy playing war.” His voice was a whisper, yet you could still hear the raspiness of it, one that came with the age his graying hair and experienced eyes showed. 

“The General has more important matters than meeting a self-acclaimed spy.” Your reply made Poe hide a proud smile with a bite on his own cheek.

“You talk just like her.” He asked, knowing quite well who you were. “Little Solo, aren’t you?”

“Are you giving us what we came for or should we just tell the General we wasted our time?”

“No!” He said in an instant. “I can’t say much, but everything you need to know is here,” he placed a drive on the table that Poe quickly went for, examining it before putting it in his pocket. 

“What’s in it?” Poe asked urgently.

“Mission logs. Everything you need to know about their locations, positions, and next attacks.” He stood up then, looking at both you and Poe with the surprised look on your faces.

“How do we know you are trustworthy?” You did your best to read him, but he gave no sign of being either on your side or on the other guys’. 

“Who would be crazy enough to meet the Resistance, anyway?” And with that, he walked away.

“Well, that was fast,” Poe spoke first, signaling the waiter for a couple of drinks not before putting the drive safely kept in one of BB-8’s compartments. 

“This better be real,” You couldn’t shake the nerves away from your body, only then realizing how risky everything could have been. Who knew, maybe you were distracted by your security after all. “What if this is a fake thing? Or a drive that will read into all of our files and all our missions and-”

“Hey, sweetheart,” Poe’s hand reached yours on top of the table, but even without the touch, the way he interrupted your dooming thoughts so sweetly, calling out for you in that way he hadn’t done before, was enough for you to land on your feet again. “It’s all going to be okay, we’ll check it before giving this to the General, ‘kay?”

You nodded, that’s all you could do, since words had left your brain for a good minute already. If his words weren’t enough before, Poe smiled at you reassuring you everything was going to be alright. And how could it not with Poe by your side?

After one more comforting hand squeeze from Poe, he leaned back, taking his surroundings in as you took the chance to admire the view before you, it was not every day that you got a relaxed, loose-curl Poe all for yourself. “Let’s get drunk, what do you say?”

“Huh?” His proposal caught you by surprise, you were too busy thinking of… other things.

“We’re already here, the night is young, and that was stressing enough.” 

You laughed at his words, murmuring a so-not-convincing “You are terrible, Poe,” covering your face long enough to not see the way he lit up at your giggles. His mission was accomplished. “Alright Commander, let’s get drunk.”

A couple more drinks flowed for each one of you, enough for both of you to be comfortably tipsy, laughing, and living that night without a care in the world. Poe was in the middle of recounting a ridiculous story about Snap, something involving his ship becoming the nest of a family of tiny rodents on their last trip to Endor and him being terrified of them, when you realized how drunk you both actually were, laughing your asses off without really being able to pay enough attention to the story.

“I swear, he kept squirming away and begging me to take them out of his ship,” Poe managed to say in between laughter.

“Oh poor Snap,” You tried having some sympathy for the guy, but in between the alcohol and Poe’s laugh, you really couldn’t feel anything other thing than an exploding amount of happiness. “How come you had never told me that story?”

“It just happened las week,” Poe’s laughter began to die down. “And you were too busy not wanting to talk to me.” He raised his eyebrows at you from behind his glass. You had no words to justify it, not this time, yet your mouth still opened and closed without a sound coming from it. The one thing you were working so hard on not bringing up was laid on the table, displayed for you in the shape of Poe’s whole heart.

“I was not- ugh, I know what it seemed like but I promise it’s not-”

“This is not just me, right? I mean… you feel this too, right?”

“What are you talking about?” You almost believed yourself, asking unknowingly as if your heart wasn’t hammering against your chest all of a sudden.

“You know what I’m talking about.” Poe was so sure about what he was saying you could be mad. But you weren’t, you couldn’t be.

You could keep quiet. You could stand up and leave and never acknowledge your feelings anymore. The thing is, you couldn’t, not when looking at him at base and much less with the stars ant the moon reflecting in his eyes. “It’s not just you, it definitely isn’t.” You stated, simple as that, but the look in his face, hopeful and gloomy all at the same time, told you that you hadn’t answered his question at all. After a sigh, you spoke again. “We can’t, Poe.” 

“Is this why you’ve been avoiding me?” He almost hoped, because that was way much better than any scenario he had played in his head.

“Yeah,” you shrugged, doubtful, not knowing how to tell him. Poe smirked, laughing at the situation you were both in. “I’m sorry, and I’m sorry for lying to you about it yesterday. But this, whatever this is, is something I never felt before.” The tiny smile he sent your way was enough to make you smile too. “Great timing, huh?”

“It’s not the best.” Poe nodded without ever breaking his stare from you.

“When Leia assigned us both, and I knew we were going to be sent away together, I- I knew I would not be able to hide it, but I had to at least try.”

“I know. I-” His own laugh interrupted him, meeting your eyes with a shimmer in them. “I felt the same way.”

You shared a silent smile, taking in the fact that you had both just confessed how bad you had fell and how you couldn’t do much about it.

“I don’t know if I’m brave enough to risk it.” The happiness you had felt mere seconds ago left the table, breaking both your hearts almost instantly. Poe understood, you saw him nodding, but that didn’t meant he agreed with you. “It’s just- It’s hard, Poe, and just imagine us trying to work this out in the middle of a war. There’s so much at stake and-”

“Hey, hey-” He cut you off, grabbing your hand over the table in a soft grasp in the process. “I know.” When he sighed you realized he felt the exact same way. “Let’s just finish this mission, ‘kay? We already have the intel, so let’s enjoy this dinner, get the job done, and when we get back we can continue our own lives forgetting about each other. Deal?” A pained smile painted his face. Poe’s eyes spoke a million words and reflected even more galaxies. You wanted to explore them forever.

No!, you wanted to scream. No deal, no way. How could he even suggest that when he knew damn well it would be a lie to you both? “Deal.” you said against yourself matching his sad smile, thinking of all the possible ways this could have ended if your lives weren’t so complicated.

The inn they had put you at was as lovely as the rest of the town, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to enjoy the night away with an actual bed instead of the hard mattresses you had back at Base. The report of today’s encounter was half-filled on your pad, which was long forgotten on the bed as your eyes got lost in the sight outside your window. Your nails couldn’t resist any more picking and biting, but you couldn’t take Poe’s words out of your mind.

He felt it. He felt it too and there you were like an idiot trying to avoid the most real thing you’ve both ever felt in years. “Fuck it.” you spoke into the silence of your room. You didn’t think twice when you began walking to the door, headed straight to Poe’s room across the hall and set this straight once and for all. You couldn’t ignore your feelings anymore.

But as soon as you opened the door you were met with Poe’s disheveled curls and his uneasy eyes. “Poe.” You greeted surprised, not knowing what else to say, the practiced speech you had planned was nowhere to be found anymore.

“I can’t,” he said firmly. “I can’t go back and live life without you. You have no idea how hard it has been for me too.” You were speechless. When you made up your mind to go and confess your feelings to Poe you never expected this, never expected him to be already at your door with a desperate confession of love. “I think I’m in love with you.” He added when he saw you were not talking. “I’ve been for a while, and I can’t pretend anymore that I’m not, especially when I know that you feel it too.”

He took a step back from your door when he saw you were quiet, muttering a quiet apology, but the lightning bolts you felt on your fingers couldn’t let him walk away.  

“Wait,” Your hand reached for his wrist and stopped him, pulling him to be close to you again, close enough for your chests to press against each other with every quick breath you took. Poe smiled, that stupidly gorgeous smile of his. 

“I’m in love with you too.” You barely finished the sentence when his lips crashed against yours, backing you into your room and closing the door behind him as his lips moved in sync with yours. Tender and soft, just as you had pictured them so many times, they molded perfectly with yours, all while his hands held your back letting yours cling around his neck, up and down his back, around his arms… anywhere they felt like going, making up for all the times you could’ve kissed him and you didn’t. His lips found their way to your neck not long after, making the most beautiful gasp leave your lips. You could feel the smile on the kisses he was peppering all over your neck and jaw, your fingers tangled in his curls to hold him firmly against your skin.

“Poe,” You breathed, and whatever it was you were going to say was cut short when he started kissing your lips again. With expert hands, firm and rough moving along your back, he walked you backward until the back of his knees reached the bed, lowering slowly to let you straddle him. Breathless, you parted your lips and found each other’s eyes. You couldn’t help but laugh, an incredulous laughter that forced you to hide your face in his neck. His fingers turned delicate as he traced circles on your back. If this was what kissing Poe was like, you would’ve kissed him the moment you met him at that bar.

“There’s no going back from this, isn’t it?” 

“There better not be.” Poe shook his head with a lovestruck smile all over his face. Your fingers reached up to trace Poe’s eyebrows, soon your lips replaced them and traced down his face, to that spot in between his eyebrows and the hard edges of his nose that you’ve always loved. Your hands traveled down his chest and began to lift his shirt, there was no hurry in your movements, all you wanted was to enjoy each minute you had together.

“Are you sure?” Poe whispered as you began to lift your own shirt.

Once it reached the floor and your hands were back to each side of his face, you replied with a smile on your face: “With you, I’m always sure.”

The night passed in a blur of soft touches and tangled limbs. Poe took his time, never rushing anything, letting every exploding emotion take over your bodies whenever it arrived, every time it arrived. It was everything you had ever dreamt of and more, it was the man you loved with every bit of your heart loving you back as if both your lives depended on it.

You were still wrapped in each other when the sun came up, the silence of the couple hours of sleep you had filling the room in a quiet haze. “What’s going to happen when we get back?” You broke the silence. “When people find out it’s all going to be a mess. My mom is going to freak out, everyone is going to talk, and the ranks are definitely going to come up…”

Poe turned his head to kiss your forehead as a way to stop your rambling mouth, which for some reason, has happened a lot in the last few hours. “Why don’t we take it slow? With telling everyone, I mean.”

“Sure, because the last 5 hours were definitely us taking it slow.” You commented with sarcasm, making Poe tickle your side. “Are you talking about a secret relationship, Commander Dameron?” Resting your chin on his chest you turned up to look at him.

“Maybe.” He met your impressed stare, and as you began to break into a smile he quickly turned around to lay on top of you. “I would want nothing but to scream into the galaxy that I’m madly in love with you,” He squeezed your side, making you squirm. “But for now, just for a while-”

“I know, I know. We should enjoy having this for just us, just for a little while.” You finished, pulling him in to kiss him. “You’re going to have to keep it professional, though.”

“What are you talking about? I’m always professional.” Much in disregard of his own words, his lips started attacking your neck leaving delicious open mouth kisses on it.

“I mean no cute little nicknames, no calling me ‘sweetheart’ in public, no sneaky looks,” Poe whined, writhing his hips against yours as he complained. “Definitely not that.” You whispered that last part, fingers sneaking up to his tangled curls.

“I can behave, sweetheart, if that’s what you’re worried about.” The way he said that, with that love-drunk smile on his face, told you just how much trouble you were in. “Can you?”

You matched his daring smile, quickly thinking and catching him off guard as you pushed him to his back and straddled his hips. “Of course I can.”

You could deal with the rest of the galaxy some other day, because right then there was nowhere you’d rather be than in Poe’s arms. 

🚀✨🚀✨🚀✨🚀✨🚀✨🚀✨🚀✨🚀✨

Thanks for reading! Please reblog and comment if you enjoyed it!

[thestupidhelmet]

How would you have written the Jay and Leia's first time storyline? You talked about how there was no emotional impact and it basically just fell flat, so how would you have handled it?

Hi! 😃

Within the context of T9S as it is, that's a tough question to answer. Jay and Leia's first time storyline fits the overall lighter, more superficial tone of T9S vs. T7S.

I would've rewritten Jay and Leia's whole storyline, tbh. I would've given both characters different core characterizations, particularly Jay. Leia's malaise and unhappiness at her Chicago life would remain the same; the cause for it would be deeper.

The foundation of their relationship would've built on depth rather than the superficiality of a Kelso clone who's capable of lasting growth and a Leia whose unhappiness is portrayed as significantly deeper than the reasons the show gives for it.

Like Eric/Donna and Jackie/Hyde before them in T7S, Jay and Leia would've connected with each other through finding solace from their woes in each other as well as joy.

Donna is Eric freedom from his (perceived and actual) suffocating and hyper-controlled home life. Eric is Donna's emotional stability and safety that she doesn't have at home.

Jackie is Hyde's challenger to face his fears of abandonment and his teacher that he's not unlovable. Hyde is Jackie's teacher that love isn't shiny presents and obedience but acts of love, like sacrificing what makes him happy to cheer her up, going to jail in her stead, becoming homeless (almost) to protect her reputation, and so much more.

Jay and Leia's relationship lacks depth because the characters do. As I've written previously, Jay in actuality would not be a Kelso clone with his upbringing by two ever-divorcing, ever-remarrying parents who are in a toxic relationship. He'd have a lot of emotional baggage and, hopefully, be a thoughtful kid rather than being a relatively carefree womanizer who overuses the word bro.

Leia is raised by two loving parents in a healthy relationship yet suffers from a sadness that is portrayed (intentionally or not) as mild depression. Finding joy and freedom in Point Place starts with her discovering Gwen, who is her real force of change. T9S would've needed Leia to stumble upon Jay, not Gwen, letting loose in his room to forge that bond.

Like Eric and Donna, their relationship would've begun platonically. Their first attraction to each other would be emotional, not aesthetic or sexual. In season 1, we would've seen their bond develop and grow, connecting Leia to Jay's friend group and -- perhaps -- causing some insecurity-jealousy-resentment from Jay's best friend, Nate. At the end of season 1, Jay and Leia's emotional bond has transformed into a romantic one, and they kiss.

In season 2, Part 1, Jay and Leia would navigate figuring out whether they want to "sacrifice" their friendship for a romance. Leia might be idealistic about it because of her parents' relationship while Jay is more cautious because his parents' relationship sucks. He'd rather keep a healthy friendship with Leia than risk a potentially toxic romance with her.

But with guidance from his friends and Red and Kitty, he realizes he and Leia don't have to be Jackie and Kelso or Eric and Donna. They can be Jay and Leia. Part 1 ends with Jay and Leia officiallybin a romantic relationship.

In season 2, Part 2, Leia is sex-positive and ready to have that connection with Jay. Jay, however, has witnessed how sex tears his family apart. He's afraid that having sex might turn him into his dad, and he'd never want to hurt Leia the way his dad hurts his mom. This would be a nice parallel and reversal of Eric and Donna's storyline in T7S.

Leia, and perhaps other characters, help Jay understand that he's nothing like his dad. He's not selfish or narcissistic. That he worries about hurting Leia proves this fact (as does so much more). Betsy, too, could've been used as an ally rather than an antagonistic. She and Jay could've bonded over and validated their dad's awfulness to their mothers.

Jay and Leia connecting sexually, having their first time, would be an affirmation of the freedom and joy they've found in each other. The actual act could've been awkward, although Donna prepared Leia how to make it less awkward. Sexually-experienced Nate could've given Jay good advice: 1) jerking off earlier in the day so that he'd last longer with Leia and 2) all about foreplay being important (although it might've been an hilarious callback to T7S had Kitty told him this information).

The scene itself, with all the emotional build up of season 1 through much of season 2, would've allowed for Jay and Leia's first time to have a similar emotional impact for the audience as Eric and Donna's.

In the aftermath, Leia is blissful and shares TMI with her friends. Jay, though, is happy but anxious. He still thinks he's got a ticking time bomb of his dad's infidelity in him. So he proposes he and Leia not have sex again for a while. In his mind, this will prove he doesn't need sex to be happy.

Leia: You mean like a week?

Jay: More like a month, maybe two. Three at the most.

Leia: I might be in Chicago or California by then if my mom doesn't let me stay in Point Place.

To Leia's mind, she thinks Jay hated having sex with her.

This conflict is resolved swiftly, however (in an episode). Jay admits enthusiastically that he loved having sex with Leia. He felt super close to her. He's just afraid he'll sleep with another girl.

Leia: Do you was to sleep with another girl?

Jay: No! But what if it's instinct, like salmon returning to where they were born to spawn?

Leia grasps his shoulders gently and kisses him. Afterward, she says, "Were you thinking another girl then?"

Jay: I wasn't thinking at all! I just --

Jay kisses Leia back, passionately. This leads to them making love again.

As they hold each other in bed, Leia says, "Still scared?"

Jay: Of what?

Leia: Cheating on me with other girls.

Jay (deadpan): What is cheating? Or other girls? I don't understand these alien concepts.

He and Leia grin at each other then make out.

***

The deeper the characters, the deeper the storylines. T9S's writing isn't deep. It's easy. It's funny but nowhere near as funny as T7S because -- at its best -- T7S's humor rose organically from the deeper characters and their deeper storylines.

T9S is another case of having a great opportunity, a great cast, and squandering it by writing toward the middle to satisfy nostalgic T7S fans and appeal to new ones. T7S didn't have the pressure of being a sequel to another show. Its creators were free to be fully original.

[intermundia]

i can't help reading this and thinking of how anakin skywalker would have handled being a father of a teenage leia. hell even a 10yo leia. 3yo. him asking a toddler "is your tone intentionally argumentative" and getting back a "yes" and what are you going to do about that. like did he pick that phrase up from obi-wan because it seems like something obi-wan would have asked him a lot, my guy is the biggest brat alive and married to padmé notoriously tenacious amidala so of course he'd have intentionally argumentative children. i really wish he hadn't nosedived into the dark side and we could have seen him try to handle it lmao

[oc-challenges]

WELCOME TO THE INTERNATIONAL WOMENS DAY CHALLENGE!

By my fault, this challenge is super late and only three days long, from the sixth to the eighth. However, I am already planning for next year so it should be much better and everyone should have a lot more time. Thanks to @come-along-pond, a new admin on this blog, for doing everything but the gif and the post itself lol.

Rules

DO NOT copy others edits

If you are doing crossovers, PLEASE make sure that the creator of the other oc is okay with crossovers.

If you want your post to be reblogged onto this blog, it must contain the hashtag #owc2024.

Feel free to ask questions!

Everything is up to the creators interpretation, although I have tried to include some examples for help!

Have fun!

if you only do some or post them on the wrong days, shake it off!

Note: although we’ve used feminine pronouns for the descriptions, non-binary and gender neutral ocs are welcome to participate!

Challenges Below

Day One: "I'm a damsel, I'm in distress, I can handle this." (March 6th)

Everyone had someone they looked up to growing up, for lots of us, that was someone in the media, and for lots of girls across the country, they came in the shapes of Disney characters. For this day, we want you to show which female media icon your OC looked up to as a little girl. Whether that be Megara, Princess Leia or even Katniss Everdeen.

Day Two: Girls Love Each Other Like Animals (March 7th)

“We don’t guard ourselves like we do with boys”. Today is all about female relationships! Which women held your OC together in times of need? Who loved her when she needed it most? Was it, her mother, friends, partners? Or even a girl she met in the bathroom who fixed her makeup and told her not to get back with their ex.

Day Three: "In March I'll be rested, caught up and human." (March 8th)

Happy International Women’s day! Women have influenced society from its beginning, and a large part of that has been through literature. We want to know what quote/s by women represent your OC! Or even, what quotes or lyrics does your OC use to ground herself. Feel free to use any female made quote, it doesn’t have to be from poetry or a book!

[dexthtoyounglings]

Can I request some fluff headcanons with Luke Skywalker? Please???

Luke Skywalker Fluffy HCs

Luke has the biggest heart eyes for you and he cannot help it when he is caught staring

....which happens to be quite a lot

He was so adamant about Grogu and his lack of attachment, but the moment he meets you...

Luke just knows that he's done for

He loves kissing you

He loves kissing your cheeks the most

He'll be getting ready for a quick run or meditation when he wakes up and has developed a habit of getting his fix of you right before he leaves

If you're waiting in doorways for him to be done so you can receive your dozen kisses, he'll hold your waist and just pepper them along the bridge of your nose and your cheeks

But when you're still asleep, he'll climb over you and grab your face, pressing long, sweet kisses all over your skin till you wake up and acknowledge him

Luke also adores photographs (I'm almost 100% sure that digital cameras exist in Star Wars though they're never spoken about)

He'll take many photos of you and print them out to keep them over the house, and also give them to Leia

He has a bit of a problem too

There's hundreds upon hundreds of photos saved on this expensive little SD card that he keeps in his desk drawer

He loves taking photos of you when you're just waking up, brushing your teeth in the bathroom, whenever you're dressed all pretty he will take a photo of you posed in front of a gorgeous scene

This man is a sucker for sundresses and the hairdos that Leia or yourself will pull your hair into

Likes early morning kisses and can easily ignore the morning breath you have

Absolutely adores seeing you with the force sensitive children and definitely looks forward to having children in the future

He's such a girl dad I can't handle it

Let's you teach the younglings basic life lessons and will allow you to take them on field trips or walks around the temple

You easily become a center of concentration for most of his meditating

When he can't focus, he will come to you and allow himself to be absorbed in your presence, you've never been in such a comfortable silence before being in the silence of Luke meditating.

•--•

[spacecadet-ticklesinspace]

Tickletober Day 4: Hide and Seek

Fandom: Star Wars (The Original Triology)

Pairing: Han and Leia (romantic) Luke (platonic)

Summary: Han finds Luke hiding in the cockpit of his ship and discovers it's because a certain princess dared him to a game of hide and seek.

(Set after A New Hope ❤️ :))

It had been a quiet day. A rarity when you were fighting against a power such as the Empire.

Han liked it and hated it at the same time.

He liked the break in the stress. Yet he also hated sitting still in one place.

To keep his mind and hands occupied, Han decided to go back over the control panel to make sure everything was in working order. The smuggler made his way to the cockpit of the Falcon.

Han sank into his chair with a sigh. "Alright darling, let's take a look."

"Should I leave?"

Han jumped and turned. "Wow!"

"Sorryhy," Luke apologized.

"Luke, what are you doing in here?" The smuggler flicked the younger Jedi's forehead. "Other than scaring me."

"Ow! I'm hiding."

"From what?"

"Leia."

The smuggler raised an eyebrow at the younger Jedi.

"She and I are playing a game."

"What? Hide and Seek?"

"Yes actually."

Han gave his friend a look.

Luke sighed. "She and I were talking about our childhoods and it got brought up how both of us used to play hide and seek."

"So you decided to re-live your childhood?"

"Well, she kinda challenged me."

"Oh did she now?"

The blond haired kid shifted up. "She said she was better at the game since she grew up with more places to hide."

Han pinched the bridge of his nose. "That sounds like Leia."

"I had to prove her wrong."

"Why am I not surprised?"

"I grew up on a desert and managed to hide from my Aunt and Uncle all the time!"

Han turned back to the younger Jedi. "Why here of all places?"

"Cause this'll be the last place she wants to come look."

"That's extremely rude of her," Han muttered.

"What do you mean?"

"Not important." Han motioned to the windshield. "Why did you choose to hide in the one place with a window?"

"Because I can keep a look out for her when she comes."

"But won't she see you?"

"Not if I scrunch down."

"Why don't you just use your Jedi mind stuff to track her?"

"It doesn't work like that."

Han placed his chin on his fist while his elbow rested on the panel. "It never does."

Luke scowled. "What do you know."

"A lot of things."

While the younger Jedi rolled his eyes, Han noticed a flash of movement near the cockpit entrance. When he glanced up, he saw a figure raise one finger to her lips.

Han's eyes quickly moved back to the Jedi next to him. "Question for ya kid. How well do you think your plan's going to work?"

"I'm not a kid." Luke looked out the windshield. "And pretty good. I've been here a while."

Han didn't move his eyes as he watched the slim figure creep toward the copilot seat. "How long?"

"Atleast an hour."

"Seriously?"

"What?" Luke turned back to the older smuggler. "I told you it was good."

"Mh-hm."

The blond haired Jedi squinted at Han. "What?"

The older smuggler watched the slimmer figure behind the chair squat down. "Nothing."

"You're hiding something."

"I'm not hiding anything."

"Yes you are. Your face says it."

Han scoffed.

"It does! Your hiding somethiIIIING!"

The older smuggler jumped forward. He pinned Luke's wrists to his chest while Leia continued pinching along Luke's sides.

"Ha! I win!" The princess teased as she spidered her fingers along Luke's ribs.

"Cheateher!"

"Liar!"

"She got you fair and square kid." Han kept the Jedi's wrists pinned with one hand so he could attack his stomach with his other hand. "Can't argue with that."

Luke dissolved into loud laughter. "Don't help heher!"

"You chose to hide in my ship, you don't get to choose who I help."

As the two bickered, Leia spidered her smaller fingers along Luke's neck. "Yeah!"

"Squeak!" The blond Jedi turtled into his shoulders. "Hey!"

Han snickered as he continued digging into Luke's stomach. "So the Jedi who's supposed to save the galaxy can't even handle a little tickling?"

Luke snorted. "Gehet ohoff mehe!"

Leia traced her fingernails along Luke's ears. "Aww, that was adorable."

The Jedi desperately tried hide his ears in his shoulders while still shaking his head. "Whhhhy!"

"Good question." Han paused his tickling. "Why are we tickling him?"

"Don't know." Leia also paused her tickling. "Just seemed like the thing to do."

Just as Han opened his mouth to respond, Luke planted one foot in the older smuggler's chest and shoved him back.

"Oof!" Han stumbled into the pilot's chair.

"Ha!"

Leia dug into Luke's lower ribs.

"WAIT! WHYHY ARE YOU AHATTACKIHING MEHE!"

"Just cause."

"Aw Princess." Han stood. "Didn't know you cared."

Leia paused her tickling. "I don't."

"Could have fooled me."

"Don't you have something more productive you could be doing instead of insulting me?"

"Don't you have something better you could be doing instead of playing hide and seek?"

"It's called stealth training."

Han patted the top of her head. "Of course it is."

Leia whacked his hand away. "Why you stuck up little . . . !"

"Sound it out Princess. You'll get there eventually."

Leia's face turned bright red as she glared at Han. She let out a growl before promptly stomping out of the Falcon.

Luke peeked at the Princess's retreating form. He then turned back to Han. "I'm guessing thehere wohon't behe a round 2?"

Han shoved Luke out of the copilot chair.

[writerbuddha]

I am conflicted about something with Star Wars. I have been thinking about the Jedi, Anakin, and what could have been done different and what would have happened if the Jedi Council had just said no to training Anakin.

I feel a lot of Anakin's issues stem from being separated from his mother when he was 9. Luke and Leia handled the lose of their loved ones better because they lost theirs when they were 19. Whereas Anakin spent a decade worrying about his mother because as far as he knew she was a slave until Watto told him what became of her.

I feel if the Jedi had freed her and give Anakin a note from her that explained she was free his training about have gone better and he would have been able to handle things better. And before it is brought up, yes she died when she was free, but my focus is on Anakin and him spending 10 years worrying about her.

But the Jedi do not help her and even stranger she has made no attempt to contact Anakin at the Jedi Temple. I guess she could have, I don't know if the Jedi would allow them to talk. Based on a line from Anakin, he says he's not allowed to be with the people he loves, I assume the Jedi would not.

So we have the story as told and we know what happens there.

If the Jedi Council refuses Anakin's training and he goes back to Tatooine or Obi-Wan leaves and trains Anakin he isn't around Palpatine and all that so he might do better but the Jedi Order still gets taken out.

I did a rewatch of the Prequels over the last few days and found Anakin really was not key to any part of Palpatine's plan. Remove Anakin and Mace and the other masters would not know Palpatine is a Sith Lord when they confront him. Although that situation probably wouldn't happen like that because I believe Palpatine revealed where General Grievous was to get Obi-Wan out of the picture and it is Palpatine that tells Anakin in the opera.

With all this in mind I have come to the conclusion that the Jedi were handed the Golden Ticket (Anakin) to destroy the Sith and instead of cashing it in to win they punched their own ticket out of existence by not addressing the situation with his mother.

The Jedi need Anakin to win, I watched a behind the scenes video where Lucas says the prophecy is real, Anakin is the chosen one, and he does fulfill the prophecy in Return of the Jedi.

And given a theme of Star Wars is nature, balance, and I see that the Jedi Order had reacted it's evolutionary dead end because the Jedi could not adapt to survive which is do something outside their rules and no allowing Anakin's training was not that in of itself. They needed to do more to help the child.

With Lucas confirming the prophecy is real and all that I am left to conclude that Anakin would have destroyed the Sith some other way.

I guess the lesson with the Jedi Order is that institutional stagnation will lead to destruction. The Jedi and Sith are cycles of life, both predators, and the Sith had evolved while the Jedi did not. Nature and the Force are unforgiving I guess.

So I guess in the grand scheme of things, what I am trying to say, is the Jedi Order had reached it's end and was mean to shuffle off.

Dear Anon,

You feel, a lot of Anakin's issues stem from being separated from his mother when he was 9, and you feel, if the Jedi had freed her and give Anakin a note from her that explained she was free his training about have gone better and he would have been able to handle things better.

The thing is, I don't get these feelings when I watch the movies. And I have to admit, I'm a bit in trouble here, because I am not sure if I can put my finger on what evokes these feelings in you. I'm all virtual ears if you are OK with telling me!

To me, it was always clear that Anakin himself tells us the cause of his issues: "I don't want things to change." And as the Jedi Masters point it out: he is afraid to lose his mother. Yoda explains he has much fear in him, which can be a problem, because there's always fear behind anger, which is behind hate, and these are adding up to a state of suffering, which also a state of being on the dark side.

The story what's told illustrates this perfectly.

You imply that you think, the older one gets, the easier for them to handle the loss of a loved one.

With all kindness in my heart, I have to tell you, that's just not true. The only thing age does is that when we get older, we more or less successfully internalize a sense of "I must get over this, I must beat this, I must take this blow with a straight face." So, we learn how to suffer with clenched teeth and screaming and weeping in the inside, because we're told, that's adult and mature. In my experience, real, genuine ability to handle the loss in a constructive way requires ceasing attachment to your loved one and develop unconditional love for them. That is, however, accessible for us in any age.

You say, Anakin spent the ten years between Episode I and II in constant worry for his mother's well-being, which undermined his Jedi training.

Since you said, you re-watched Episodes I-II-III recently, please help me: on which part or parts of the movies you draw this conclusion? What makes you think that he felt that his mother is in constant danger? Because to be honest, I see Anakin being afraid of losing his mother, I see him missing his mother, I see him being sad over not being with his mother, but I don't see him worrying for her well-being. He is afraid of losing her - he is not fearing for her.

He even says, "I don't know why I keep dreaming about her" in Episode II, and when he realizes that he’s having premonitions about his mother being in pain, and returns to Tatooine, his behavior toward Watto is quite friendly, rather than jumping to the conclusion that it must be his former slaver, who harmed Shmi, pretty heavily implying that he did not expect Shmi to get hurt while he is away, training.

You find it strange that Shmi did not contact with Anakin, and you vaguely suggest that she was not allowed to communicate with Anakin, because the Jedi would forbid it.

In Episode II, when they discuss the life of the Jedi Knight, Padmé says, "Must be difficult, having sworn your life to the Jedi... not being able to visit the places you like or do the things you like." To which Anakin replies: "Or be with the people that I love." Now, you read this in a way that says: Jedi Knights are not allowed to do the things they enjoy, visit the places they enjoy or be with the people they enjoy to be with. To me, this does not make too much sense.

To me, the discussion is about the fact that Jedi Knights go to the places and be with the people where they are needed, with who they need them, as their duty dictates this. Not where they would like to be, or with the people they would like to be.

When I watch Episode I, I see no reason to believe that Shmi and Anakin expected to be able to communicate, which makes sense - Tatooine is the seat of a crime lord, it would be rather strange if the heart of the Galactic Republic and the Jedi Order would be a "phone call" away. I'm afraid, you read too much into this, which seems to be founded on the idea that the Jedi are frowning upon love.

You say, the Jedi could have done more for Anakin and they were supposed to change.

Well, at the end of the day, Anakin was resisting their teachings - that's not something that only he could have change. Instead, he wanted to stop things changing, he wanted to stop the sun from setting and to stop people from dying. From where I stand, I can see no flaw in how the Jedi Order operated.

You seem to say that the Jedi Council was wrong to not to say no to training Anakin.

With all fairness, the Jedi Council actually did say no to training Anakin, because he was too old to be trained. In the end, they said yes, because they felt, the right thing to do is to train him to cultivate unconditional love for all living beings, to cease his grasping and clinging to coming and passing things and to overcome his fear, anger, hate and aggression, and to train him to be a selfless guardian of peace and justice in the known universe. So we have the story as told and we know what happens there. But in Episodes IV, V and VI it's powerfully stated that it's not impossible. Luke started his own training even later in his life, and he was able to become a true Jedi Knight, something that Anakin failed to achieve until the very end.

You seem to say, since Darth Sidious would have been able to orchestrate the separatist crisis and the clone wars with the clone army, thus he would have been able to butcher the Jedi and turn the Republic into the Empire without Anakin helping him, proves that the Jedi Order was beyond saving, it was "institutionally dead". And that they are "predators" and they were meant to be erased.

I am truly sorry, but I have to say, I genuine have no idea of what makes you draw this conclusion. I have the feeling that there is something else going on that is unrelated to Star Wars, that you might need to work out... If I'm wrong about this, I apologize. It comes off like something else is going on.

[djarinsphere]

hi there! would love a short fic about jedi!reader introducing Din to long-time friends Han and Leia, which eventually leads to a very intense game of sabacc between Din and Han. thank u <3~

A game of sabacc

Din Djarin x female!Jedi!reader

Words: 1.9k Warnings: mentions of alcohol

For weeks, you had been trying to get Din to head to Coruscant with you. Whenever you brought it up again, he let out an annoyed sigh, talking about how he had so much to do when it came to bounties, payments and travel. 

You respected that of course. Being in a relationship with Din for a while had taught you that the man had his own way to travel, to live and to handle things. Going back to Coruscant to meet with some old friends of yours just wasn’t high on his list of priorities right now. 

But this list had to change at some point. As he slowly started working through the long list of available bounties, he gained more free time. Din would have preferred to spend it with you on a remote planet, just the two of you basking in your love for each other, but if visiting Coruscant was going to make you happy, then he would use his free time for that. Anything to see a smile on your face. 

Besides, you had talked a lot about Han Solo and Leia Organa. Your eyes were sparkling every time you told him a story about your two friends or just referred to a funny situation you had been in with Leia.

While you had been exploring your connection to the Force, mostly with Luke, you did have a lot of intimate talks with Leia as well. It brought you closer together, making you good, intimate friends. Din deserved to know that part of you.

You had been together for quite a while, a year or more, but he had never met any close friends of yours. Acquaintances maybe. People that had helped you out on your travels every once in a while. But after all this time together, sharing intimate moments together, opening up more and more, you felt like Din needed to meet your long-time friends eventually. 

It was a sunny day when you finally arrived in Coruscant, landing with the Razor Crest. “Oh, there she is!” You exclaimed excitedly when you spotted Leia outside. The woman was carrying a smile on her lips as she watched the engines of the Razor Crest turn off one by one. “I’ve seen her before. In the holo news,” Din mumbled, fixing the position of his helmet a bit. He didn’t wear it around you that often anymore, but as soon as you entered the atmosphere of a new planet, where scans of the ship could be made, he was hiding his face again. You respected this tradition. His armour was a part of him, as was the Mandalorian way of life. 

“Of course you’ve seen her before. She’s a war hero and part of the New Republic.” A chuckle left your lips as you shouldered your bag and then climbed down the ladder from the cockpit. Grogu was already in his little floating crib, a satisfied expression on his face. You had given him some sweets earlier. “Excited to meet some friends?” You asked him with a smile and the small child angled his head slightly, a curious expression filling his gaze. 

As soon as the ramp had opened, Leia was coming towards you, her arms flying around your neck to pull you into a tight hug. “Oh, how I have missed you,” she smiled, the excitement also filling her voice. You felt at home, welcomed back into the arms of your friend. 

You didn’t hesitate to hug her back, happiness spreading into every bone of your body. As soon as you left the hug though, you reached back to grab Din’s arm gently. The cool metal of his armour felt familiar under your fingertips. 

“Leia, this is Din Djarin. A bounty hunter I’ve been travelling with and well…” You didn’t need to say more. Leia understood that Din was not only “someone” you travelled with. At least not anymore. 

You could feel Din’s nervousness through the Force. He could hide it well behind his mask and his armour sometimes, but he couldn’t betray the Force. He couldn’t trick your feelings, the connection between you two. 

“Welcome to Coruscant, Din. My husband and I are excited to finally meet you,” the Princess smiled, as welcoming as always. Leia had a presence you had never seen before with anyone else. She was friendly, encouraging and a great leader at the same time. Without her, you doubted that the Rebellion would have been able to defeat the Empire. Without her, the war might still be going at this very moment. 

“Oh, I’m glad Han is here. Haven’t seen him in a while either,” you chuckled, remembering the last times you had visited Leia. Han just wasn’t one to settle down for a long time. He needed adventure, the dangers of the galaxy, in his every day life. 

“Yeah, he’s been preparing some drinks for us all. Follow me.” Leia gestured for you and Din to follow her to their apartment. 

Din couldn’t deny that he had never been in a place as fancy as this one. Technologies he had never even heard about ran this place. The apartment was huge, the windows big enough to capture the gigantic Coruscant skyline. “You also used to live in a place like this, cyar’ika?” He whispered, bending down a bit to make sure no one else heard. “No, but I’ve spent some time here. With the princess,” you explained, a chuckle leaving your lips again. You had never experienced the luxury of really living in a place like this, but your friends had often enough let you get a glimpse of it. 

Han Solo, the infamous pilot and smuggler, greeted you in the living room area. It was spacious, with a long couch and drinks ready on the glass table. You greeted him with a hug as well, feeling his hands rub your back in a brotherly gesture. “Been a while,” the pilot grinned and then took a step back to look at you. “No major injuries. Everything’s going well, then? And who is this guest of yours?” He asked, not hiding his curiosity. Not that he had ever been able to hide it. 

“That’s my partner. Din Djarin,” you replied. A smile spread over your lips. He was your partner. Hopefully for more years to come. 

“You look like you could play an entertaining game of sabacc, my friend,” Han grinned, offering Din his hand. 

The Mandalorian tensed up a bit, before he eventually shook Han’s hand. “You could say that.” You had seen Din play sabacc a handful of times. He was good at it. Especially since no one was able to read his expressions usually. You had only played against him once, but had failed miserably.

“Then let’s go.” Han had a wide grin in his face as he lead Din over to the kitchen table. The pilot grabbed a deck of sabacc cards from a cupboard in the kitchen, eventually laying down the cards. You positioned yourself behind Din, putting your hands on his shoulders. “Good luck,” you whispered, fingers brushing over the scarf around his neck. You wished you could give him a kiss as a good luck charm. But maybe he could have one as a reward later. 

The game eventually started. Han’s expression immediately changed. The grin was gone, instead he was furrowing his eyebrows as he concentrated fully on the cards in front of him. Din’s shoulders tensed up under your grip as he studied his own cards. You could feel the tension between he two players growing continuously. 

Glances were exchanged, in hopes of trying to read the other’s mind. Could they maybe have better cards? “I know I’ve won,” Han said, confidently. It was probably a part of his strategy, trying to make Din slip up and maybe draw more cards that could possibly be a disadvantage. 

“Do you?” Din asked in return, leaning forward a bit. “I think you’re trying to fool me, smuggler.” The tension was rising between them, your hands getting a tighter grip on your partner’s shoulders. 

Leia was already making a step forward to maybe interfere with this game before it could get out of hand. But Han motioned for her to stand back, for now.

“And I think you’re trying to look tough with those cards on your hands.” Han’s mouth formed into yet another grin as he leaned forward as well. Din’s heartbeat rose, a sign of his growing ambition to win this game. Had it been a good idea to let these two play a card game together?

“Just like you’re trying to look tough by switching up your cards with the ones in your sleeve.” 

You raised your eyebrows at the pilot in the seat across from you. Han’s cheeks turned a deep shade of red. “You-” he started, but an angry stare from his fiancé was enough. 

“How?” 

It was all Han asked after that. He wasn’t embarrassed about his attempt at cheating, they didn’t actually play for money, but his ego was still a bit hurt. The Mandalorian was the first person to look past his tricks.

“Let’s just say I’ve got an eye for that,” Din shrugged confidently, slowly getting up again. “Maybe you should try to act less confident next time. It’s kind of like carrying a sign that says ‘I cheat’ around everywhere you go.”

Han let out another chuckle, clearly amused but also impressed by how well Din had been able to identify his tricks. 

“Well done. A drink?” Han suggested, handing out the drinks he had already made earlier. Din wasn’t able to drink it now of course, but he would gladly do it when they were in their own room – the guest room. 

Din was slowly removing his armour, eventually placing his helmet down on the windowsill in your room. He let a hand run through his messy curls before facing you with a smile. “I was surprised your friend took that loss so well,” he chuckled, sitting down on the edge of the bed. 

“Me too. He’s usually quite bad at that. But… how did you know he was cheating?” You had been watching Han closely as well, but you had no idea what he had done with the cards. 

You walked over to the Mandalorian as he parted his legs for you to stand between them. His hands found your hips, giving them a small squeeze before he tilted his head further up, his brown eyes searching for yours. “I didn’t. I just figured he would. Seemed to confident,” he explained and an amused smile appeared on his face.

Din knew people like Han too well not to notice something might be wrong. Even if there was no real evidence at first.

You were impressed, truly. But you still had a question left. “How did you know about the sleeve then?”

“Common smuggler trick. I can show it to you if you want,” he shrugged, placing a soft kiss on your chin. “Even though I doubt I can pull it off. I’m not a smuggler after all.”

“No, you definitely aren’t,” you chuckled, hands finding their way into his curls. “You’re something a lot better. You’re mine.”

Then you kissed the Mandalorian, passionetely.

Maybe also as a reward for his sabacc win.

[cipher-animations-blog]

I have so many thoughts about Working Boys oh my god. I’ve now rewatched it twice.

Spoilers after the cut if I did this right.

Alright, so Hidgens was very close with all of the Working Boys. But I just keep thinking about the emphasis on Chad. For the rest of the guys, including Hidgens himself, the names got changed with the gender swap. Stu became Sue, Leighton to Leia, Steve to Eve, Henry to Henrietta. But Chad doesn’t change. Chad stays the same even though it doesn’t really fit. And the potential of Chad seeing the show is what sends Hidgens completely off the deep end. He can’t handle even the thought of Chad seeing the show like this. Even when listing everyone’s names in the title song, Chad is always the one emphasized. Both in TGWDLM and here. And I’m just wondering why? What kind of relationship did these two have that caused Hidgens to hold him in a such higher regard than even the rest of his boys? Who is Chad to Hidgens? Because it feels like there’s something deeper to this.

Now am I just overthinking what started as a throwaway joke? Yes. But hey, that’s what we always do in this fandom.

Also unrelated to that but the thought of the aftermath of Working Boys is also really interesting to me. Mainly for characters like Grace and Richie. Grace got that taste of murder, but would it lead to a similar path she went down at the end of Nerdy Prudes? It’s hard to say but that’s pretty likely knowing what she’s like. And what about Richie? How does he go on with his life after watching his best friend get dismembered? His last memory of her being one of her most embarrassing moments? Can he move on from that?

This post doesn’t really have a point I just have a lot of thoughts. And thats not even going into the death match today. Specifically Ted winning Wiggly’s Crown. Oh the potential with that is strong.

[this-acuteneurosis]

Every time Leia wishes she knew more about how the clone wars went in her timeline I want to tell her everything so she can understand just how much worse it could be

"Yeah the whole thing started off with the Republic launching a full scale invasion of a Separatist planet and then one of the first things they did was make a deal with the Hutts and order Anakin to handle it"

I made a very deliberate choice to limit Leia's knowledge of the past, partly to increase the potential angst that would come when Leia experienced bad things and had no idea how bad they were in context.

But also, Leia's still relatively young at this point (mid twenties), and just finished dismantling an Empire before she got here. While I think Bail and Breha gave Leia some truths about the Clone Wars to make sure she didn't fall for Imperial propaganda, I don't think they wouldn't have told her a ton of details. Partly because they wouldn't have known all of them. Partly because letting Leia know certain things might have led her to ask questions they didn't want to answer. And probably because they didn't want to give her bad information. Bail spent most of the war not having a clue that he was working under the direct leadership of a Sith Lord. There are a million reasons (shame, not trusting his own memories of things) that he wouldn't bring lots of important things up.

Anyway, yeah. Leia has no concept of how much better or worse her actions are making things and that will absolutely come up again. :D

[jedi-enthusiast]

My [ongoing] CodyWan Fic Masterlist

Hello! Sorry that this post is a little late, as I said in another post, I've been busy and it kinda got sidetracked--but it's here now!

This rec list isn't gonna be as long as the other one, since I haven't really had time to get into new fics (life stuff + the work of writing my own fic), but there a still a good chunk of them + a couple are series.

They're gonna be separated into "Ongoing" and "Abandoned" so that way you know what you're getting into and I'll put more info in the description--and yes, I'm recommending a couple abandoned works because I think they're still good and maybe with enough support the authors will decide to continue. Either way, they're good fics.

Ongoing

shoulder the sky by @shootingstarpilot

Have I already recced this series? Yes. Am I still reccing it again? Also yes.

I seriously cannot rave enough about how awesome and well done this fic is, and no amount of me harping on it will ever do it thejustice it deserves. This fic has made me laugh, cry, get really pissed at the characters, and it has me waiting (im)patiently for every update--like, every single day I check Ao3 and it's just to check if this fic has updated.

It handles Jedi and Clone culture beautifully and adds in so much interesting world building, it perfectly balances out the fluff with the angst, it handles grief and PTSD very well, and so many other things! The author is also honestly just very sweet and even takes time out of his day to reply to as many comments as possible (which is insane, because there are always like 70+ comments on every chapter).

The Emperor and His Mandalorian by wanderingjedihistorian (RangerJedi67)

Technically I think this would be considered finished, but the author has added a new work to the series every couple months since I found it, so I'm adding it here just in case.

It's a Sith!Obi-Wan AU where Obi-Wan kicks Palpatine's ass and becomes Emperor and marries Cody, son of Manda'lor Jango Fett, as an agreement when Mandalore surrenders to him. I honestly really like how this fic handles Obi-Wan as a Sith and how that affects his actions and relationships with others, as well as Cody being a sort of "balance" for Obi-Wan's dark tendencies.

I'm not even a big fan of Sith!Obi-Wan fics, but this series is the one that got me to start reading some of them--so it definitely comes recommended!

no one left to sing to by slotmachines_fearofgod

This fic is a really interesting take on what would happen in TCW if Cody took more of an active role in the story. I love the author's take on Cody's character and how both his duty to his brothers and all the Kamino bullshit effects how Cody handles Obi-Wan and his feelings towards him.

Also the ending of the most recent update had me screaming and crying at my computer.

The art of living anyway by Itstwointhemorningwhyamiawake

A "Rex is Force-sensitive" fic that follows Cody and Obi-Wan's relationship as well. This fic is pretty new, so I don't really know where it's going, but the first two chapters have been amazing so far!

Abandoned

the sun is just a star by clementines_and_colorful_things

It's hard to give this fic a description that does it justice, but it's honestly really really good. It's basically a slow burn that follows Obi-Wan and Cody through TCW and, according to the tags, would eventually lead to Order 66 happening differently than in RotS.

More Than Blood by generalekenobi

Where Order 66 happens a bit differently and Cody and Obi-Wan end up on the run with baby Luke and Leia, having to masquerade as a Mandalorian couple to do so (uh-huh, yep, totally fake--them have feelings for each other? never).

I really love how this fic gives Cody agency and lets him go "no, we're not doing that, try again" and actually effect the story's outcome. It makes the story a lot more interesting and adds to the dynamic between Cody and Obi-Wan--both relationship-wise and in their newfound mission in taking care of the twins.

I Can Barely Recall (but it's all coming back to me now) by Shortcuts_make_long_delays

Ok, so I don't know if this fic is abandoned or just taking a while to update, so I just put it here--just be aware of that.

This is a Modern!AU where Cody and Obi-Wan used to date, but broke up due to something that keeps being hinted at but not overtly stated (and fuck, I just wanna know what happened! It's killing me!), and now Cody meets his ex "Ben" again when he turns out to be Obi-Wan, Anakin's older brother.

This fic is really interesting and well written and, like I said before, I really just want to know wtf the accident is--the suspense is killing me! Ahhhhhh!

Honorable Mention

An honorable mention for Not This Crude Matter by thebitterbeast

This fic was gonna be apart of the "ongoing" section, but the final part was posted like right after I posted my finished CodyWan rec list.

This series isn't just centered around Cody and Obi-Wan, but I still think it handles their relationship--and other relationships--beautifully. It centers mainly around Jedi culture and it's honestly one of my favorite takes on it. I can't recommend this series enough!

[andydrysdalerogers]

Troublemaker ~ 4 ~ Back In The Saddle

He is one of the best goaltenders in the league. He's also hated by his teammates. He didn't mean to be a troublemaker but why not lean into it? There wasn't anyone to stop him.

Until he met her...

A Jeremy Swayman AU x OFC Stella Williams

Story Warnings: excessive drinking, SMUT!, an asshole Jeremy, angst

A/N: Hello and welcome to a spin-off "Cross-Checked" so plenty of characters from that story are crossing over here! If you want a more detailed story of how we ended up here, read the first store HERE Also! The taglist is open. If you want to be added or removed, please let me know!

2nd A/N: This Chapter is directly intertwined with Chapter 16 of "Cross-Checked". You can read both sides here

Previous: The Best Friend

Please note that I do not give permission for my work to be translated, reposted, or published anywhere other than my Tumblr. Reblogs are most welcome though!

Banners by me! Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Series Masterlist // Main Masterlist

“I can’t believe that asshole has the balls to try and see Leia. What I wouldn’t give to kick his balls so far up him, he’d cough them up.” 

I snorted with a laugh. “How did I not know about your violent side, Warrior Princess?”  

“I am not violent. It just, she’s been through enough with her mom and everything.” Stella looked out the window.  “I know you didn’t know, but your actions hurt her a lot.”  

I went quiet. “You know I was just frustrated and stuff and that I feel like an ass already.”  

It was her turn to sigh.  “I know. Sorry. Bret just brings out my murderous side,” she said with a smile.  

“I didn’t realize that you woke up and chose violence.” She grumbled something that I didn’t hear. “What was that?” 

“He ruined morning sex,” she whined out. This time I laughed out loud. “What?”  

“Nothing,” I reply, still chuckling. "Didn’t realize that it was a national emergency.” She looked at me confused.  “Morning sex. They way you whined about it. Were you going to jump me, warrior princess?” 

“And you would have enjoyed it, Swayman,” she replied with a smirk.  

Fuck yeah, I would have.  

We arrived at Andy and Leia’s house and took the long way to get to the front door to avoid the douche in the driveway.  Stella rang the doorbell and put on a smile.  I shoved my hands in my pocket because I really wasn’t sure how this was going to go.  

Miranda opened the door and her mouth fell open. “Why?”  

“That’s an interesting greeting, Miranda.” Stella rolled her eyes. “I brought back up.”  

“Leia, please come over here,” Miranda yelled behind her.  

I sucked in a breath when I saw her. Leia was now obviously pregnant as she walked over. “What is it... Jeremy?!” 

Stella immediately starts talking.  “I was working on stretches with Jeremy when Miranda texted.  What better than a six-foot two hockey player to help?” 

“Hi Leia.”  I kept studying her face and body. As much as I wanted to say that I regretted leaving the potential relationship, I’m glad I did. I couldn’t handle not being the father to her baby.  If I wanted that, I would want to have been there to create it. I offered a smile to her.  

“Hi Jeremy.” She keeps a neutral face except for a wince and then starts to rub her belly. “Umm, as you can see,” She looked around me, “I have an unwelcome guest in my driveway.”  

“I can’t believe this douche had the nerve to come here,” Stella said. “Can I kick him in the balls?” 

“Relax Warrior Princess,” I said with a smirk.  “I’ll handle it.” I turned and walked towards Bret.  The douche in question was leaning on a BMW sedan like he owned the world. I had about three inches on him and about 15 pounds, mostly muscle. “What the fuck are you doing here?” 

“I came to see my girl.”  

“Pretty sure she stopped being your girl when you left her behind. Get off of her and Andy’s property. Now.”  

Bret’s face is turning red. “If she wants me to leave, then we need to have a conversation.”  

“You don’t need dick.” I point to his car and motion for him to leave.  “Get out before she calls the cops.”  

A look of malice crosses his face. “Why are you defending her?”  Pointing at Leia, he continues. “What, hoping she’ll leave Andy?  She’s a slut who...” I see the flash of fear in Leia’s eyes, and I stopped him by grabbing the collar of his jacket and hauling him closer to me.  

“Finish that sentence and you are a dead man.” He blanches and I let him go. He stumbles back. “Don’t look at her or come back here or contact her again,” I growl out. Bret scrambles for the car and drives off. I don't move until I see the car round the corner and turns to face us. “He shouldn’t bother you anymore Leia.”  

“Thank you, Jeremy. I’m glad that nothing happened so it wouldn’t aggravate your injury. Are you ok?” The concern on her face makes my heart clench.  I hurt this girl with my actions and words.  For what? Just a badge of conquest.  She didn’t deserve that. She had every right to be hurt, be angry, to hate me, but she didn’t.  I have to take my shot at making this right. She may not forgive me or acknowledge it but I have to try. 

“Yeah, I just...” I ran my hand through my hair. “I know how much of a jerk I’ve been, and you don’t have to accept this right now but I’m sorry Leia. For everything.”  

“Oh.” She looked surprised.   

“Anyways, if he comes back while the boys are gone, just call me.” I gave her my best smile and pointed to my car. “I’m gonna go. You look beautiful, by the way.” He turned and walked before she could say anything else. I didn’t want to hear that she still hated me. I got in my car to wait for Stella.  She had a short conversation with the girls before she came back to the car. “Everything ok?” 

“Yeah, just letting them know I would be back later.” I took off.  

“So...” I started.  

“So...” she said with a smile.  

I smirked. “Morning sex?” 

A smile burst on her face. “Absolutely.”  

A day later I was cleaning my apartment and doing laundry, and my phone rang.  When I checked on who was calling, I was surprised but not shocked.  “Hey Cap.” I sounded nervous.   

“Hey Sway. I just got off the phone with Leia.” He sounded frustrated.  I can only imagine. Not being able to be home and protect his family has got to be grading on his mind.  

“Oh. Is she ok?” 

“Yeah, she and the baby are fine. Listen, I just wanted to say thank you for helping her with Bret and chasing him off.”  

“It's not a problem.” 

“No, you didn’t have to do that.  Especially with the way I have treated you lately.”  

I let out a sigh. I figured this was coming. I deserved what happened.  I knew that now. “Look, Andy, I was a jerk and I owed Leia.”  

He stopped for a moment. He wasn’t disagreeing with me. “Well, anyway, thanks or helping her. I hope we can talk when we get back.”  

I smiled. “Sure Cap.” Have a good game.  A thought flashes.  “FYI, Vegas’s goalie likes to favor his left.”  

He laughed, “Thanks Sway. See you in a few days.”  

The ice has always been a place where I can find solace, peace, focus. I’ve been playing hockey since I was five and it has always been my happy place.  

Except for today.  

Today I am nervous.  It's my first practice back with the team. I know that Andy said we were cool, but I don’t know what the rest of the team is thinking.  I walked in with my gear bag and immediately ran into my Coach.  “My office,” he says. He walks away.  

I was early so I dropped my gear bag in the locker room and headed to his office. “Yes Coach?” 

“Sit.” He leans back as I sit in front of him. It's been 15 days since I have seen this man. “When’s the last time you’ve had a drink?”  

I swallowed. “Twelve days.”  The night I spent with Stella.  We had spent the next day talking and it was like a total reset.  I hit the gym after that and booked private rink time away from the arena.  My goalie coach was able to give me exercises and drills. I was feeling better, both physically and mentally.  

He nodded. “Barber told me he called you.” I nodded.  “Is your head back on straight?”  

“Yes, sir.  Just nervous to be with the team again. I know I need to apologize to them.”  

“Good. That’s the maturity I knew you had. Keep up with what you’re doing Jeremy. We need you if we want to make this run. I’ve give you five minutes.”  

“Thank you, sir.”  I got up and went back to the locker room.  Linus was sitting in my stall. “Hey.”  

“You’re back.”  He looked me over. “And sober.”  

“I had help,” I replied. “Coach cleared me to practice. I just need to talk to the team. Coach gave me five.”  I pulled off my hoodie to start changing. Linus kept looking at me. “What?” 

“You seem different.” He looked at me up and down.  

“I’m feeling great. I took the time to think and reflect and I’m in a better headspace. I stopped drinking after you called and really took the time, you know.” 

Linus finally gave me a smile for the first time in a while. “I’m happy for you Jeremy. We’re all worried about you.  Andy talked to the team after the incident with Leia.”  

“He did?” I stood up from pulling my pads on. “What did he say?” 

“That he was ending his shutout. Said we needed to be a family to be a great team and it started with him.” Linus smiled. “He’s a good leader and will make a great father. That little girl will be loved and protected.”  

She’s having a girl. I can see it, Barber as a girl dad.  Leia loving her little girl in cute little dresses. A little Barber jersey, covered in sparkles. It was easy to picture that. And my heart didn’t hurt. Because I could see my own kids, with their jersey on.  

Standing with Stella.  

Huh, that’s new.  

I glide out to the ice first, wanting to get used to the cold air.  This is where I am the most centered. I stretch out my legs as I skate around the rink. I take deep breaths. I know that in five minutes, I need to face my team and make apologies that I know I owe them.  I left them in a lurch for very selfish reasons.  They are my family away from my family in Alaska. Linus is my best friend and my brother.  

I hear another pair of skates hit the ice and I see Andy and Luke on the ice as well.  I stop on the far side, and they skate up to me.  “Hey, Sway,” Andy said.  

“Cap.” I looked at Luke. “Luke.”  

“Jeremy."  Luke didn’t glare but his face showed he wasn’t very trusting.  

I took a breath. “Look, before the guys come out, Coach asked me to talk to the team and I will, but I wanted to talk to you first. I wanted to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry I thought that I could be so callous and disrespectful with Leia.” I looked down. “I apologized to her, and I don’t expect forgiveness from her. But I wanted to apologize to you both because I disrespected our friendship and brotherhood. I’m working on my attitude and I’m focusing on the game and the team.”  

It was quiet for a moment. “My sister is my whole world, Sway. You thinking she’s just some quick fuck hurt because I thought we were brothers.”  

“I know, Luke. I was very wrong. She deserves to be with someone who treats her like a queen.” I smile at Andy. “I know what you call her. She deserves to be with you.”  

Luke studies me for a minute and then he smiles. “Brothers?” He offers his hand.  

“Brothers.” I took his hand and he pulled me into a bro hug. It's kinda hard to hug like a bro which is why Ullmark and I hug the way we do.  

I turn when I hear the gate open again and the rest of the team hit the ice. Time to make things right.  

I’m sitting in front of my cubby, trying to get in the zone. Coach decided I was starting against Toronto tonight. I haven’t played in three weeks but the last two times I faced Toronto, we won. I have my headphones, Metallica drowning out the locker room sounds. I’m getting in the zone when the next song starts. And I can’t help but smile and take myself back to twelve days ago.  

I’m putting this song on your playlist.  

Which song? 

Its gonna be a surprise Sway. Just like me.  

I can see her smile. Her giggle that morning after, after another round. It was the afternoon, a few hours since I confronted Bret. 

As Taylor Swift’s The Man plays, I can see the whole game and I know, I’ve got this.  

The buzzard sounds and the roar of the crowd dulls my hearing. A shutout.  A fucking shutout against Buffalo. My team came over and congratulated me as per tradition. The last one is Linus.  It's always Linus. “Shutout baby! You got this!” 

“I got this!” I yell back before extending my arms and hugging Linus is our famous goalie hug. I’ve missed this. He didn’t do it with our back up. It's just a him and me thing. Coming off the ice, I’m stopped by media.  “You’re the first star of the game Sway.”  

I smile and wait for my name to be called. Linus pats my back and heads to the locker room. 

“And your first star of the game, taking 32 shots and a complete shutout, your goalie, number one, Jeremy Swwwwaaaayyyyymannnnn!!!!” 

I skate back onto the ice and toss my stick to a kid in the stands.  I come back and wipe my sweaty hair and sit next to our team reporter.  

“Jeremy, congratulations on the shutout!” 

“Thank you.”  

“You were out for a couple of weeks with a lower body injury. It seems like you’re feeling better.”  

“I feel great. The training staff here are top notched and got me back to 100%.” I smirk at my words.  

“Penguins are up next. You and Linus Ullmark usually trade off in net. Do you think that the coaches might change that?” 

“I hope not,” I say with a smile. “Its a winning combo and Linus and I are on the same page.  Whoever is in next gets the teams support.”  

“What about the team?”  

“The team is amazing and is playing at the next level. We are brothers and they had my back just like I have theirs. Can’t wait to make a playoff run with them.” 

“Thank you, Jeremy and congratulations.”  

“Thanks!” I stand and wave to the crowd. I get into the locker room and sit at my cubby again. I see my phone still has the last little bit on the song. It was great, having the win on a shutout. But something in my routine has changed. And I know exactly what it is.  

I clean up and head over to the trainers area.  I see Stella folding some towels. She looks adorable in her trainers uniform. I walk up to her, and she lifts her head and sees me. “Hey Sway! Nice shutout.”  

“Thank Stel.” I swallow. “Can I talk to you in private?” 

She wrinkles her brow in confusion.  She motions me into their office, and we sit on the couch. “What’s up Jer?” 

I look at my hands and resolve to not be chicken-shit.  

“I have a proposition for you, Stella.”

NEXT

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