#leave it alone. leave her alone. leave me alone. leave us alone
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Arcane Women Strap Hcs
characters: sevika, vi, caitlyn, mel, ambessa
A/N barely proofread sorry, also my first time writing for arcane please be kind 🙈 i hope y’all enjoy lmk your thoughts :)
Sevika
first things first she has a dark purple strap i’m talking almost the same color that shimmer is and boy does she know how to use it
whenever she pulls the strap out be prepared to not be able to walk the next day
she prefers to fuck you in missionary but if she had to choose a different position it would be fucking you from the bottom, she just loves to be able to see your face while she pleasures you
her strap game is DIABOLICAL, she always makes sure to hit that spot inside you that makes you let out a squeal and causes your toes to curl
honestly she could just cum from fucking you alone but if you feel up to it once she’s done with you she loves when you eat her out after
“that’s it baby, you’re taking me so well just a little more”
Vi
vi screams black strap to me like it just makes sense
she prefers to fuck you slow and DEEP, i’m talking girly lifts your hips off the bed and grips them so hard that you can feel bruises form
shes so cocky about it too like she knows she’s good
vi’s another one that could cum from pleasuring you alone and 9/10 times she does, however the one time she doesn’t she will literally sit on your face once you’re well enough to take care of her
“that feel good pretty girl ? yeah i know it does, you’re always so good for me”
Caitlyn
dark blue strap sorry yall i don’t make the rules
caitlyn loves when you’re on top and she’s fucking you from below
she revels in the sight of you falling apart above her while she’s gripping your hips guiding you
she’s 100% a brat tamer and you can’t tell me any different
“oh darling is it too much ? you shouldn’t have behaved like that if you didn’t want me to fuck you like this”
Mel
HEAR YE HEAR YE she has a gold strap idc idc
mel also likes it when you’re on top however she prefers to gently guide your movements while she praises you
don’t let that mislead you tho shes a HUGE tease
she can and will make you edge yourself until you’re literally crying begging her to let you cum
“ my love you look so beautiful when you ask nicely like that, go ahead and take what you need”
Ambessa
ruby red strap that’s all imma say
the cruelest of the bunch, she’s not afraid to leave you dry while she takes what she needs
another brat tamer yall you love to see it
she doesn’t make love she FUCKS, be prepared to constantly be buying new headboards
she makes you suck on her strap NEXTTTTT
“sweet girl did you think i’m finished with you ? no no we aren’t done until you can’t remember anything but my name”
#dividers from cafekitsune#sevika x reader#sevika smut#vi x reader#vi smut#caitlyn kiramman x reader#caitlyn kiramman smut#mel medarda x reader#mel medarda smut#ambess medarda x reader#ambessa medarda smut#arcane x reader#arcane smut#arcane#arcane netflix#arcane league of legends
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Chosen p.t 2 || Rafe Cameron x fem!reader love island au
Summary: read part one here
Warnings: angst
Word count: 1,173
A/n: help i forgot i had this in my queue LOL mb!!!
MASTERLIST (love island au masterlist)
divider by @h-aewo
You laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, Rafe’s absence a hollow ache beside you. You’d grown used to the warmth of his arm around you, the gentle rise and fall of his chest that lulled you to sleep each night. Without him, the bed felt colder, lonelier, and you couldn’t shake the memory of Kayla’s confident words as she chose him, as if she held a secret you didn’t.
Leah rubbed your arm in comfort, her eyes softening. “Yeah, must be tough after last night. The whole situation was shit. I don’t know what Kayla was thinking.” You managed a small smile, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “Neither do I, honestly. Rafe said there was nothing to worry about, but then she just… picked him. It just doesn’t make sense.”
You caught Sofia’s gaze, and she gave you a small, reassuring nod. “Maybe it’s not as deep as it seems,” she offered. “Maybe she just picked him because he looks good on paper—he’s confident, attractive, all that. She probably just wanted attention.” You nodded, trying to take comfort in her words, but the unease still simmered.
You nodded, trying to find comfort in her words, but the uncertainty still twisted inside you. Rafe had reassured you last night, had looked you in the eyes and held your hand with that steady, familiar touch that always made you feel seen. But now, with the memory of Kayla confidently choosing him and the doubt simmering beneath, it was harder to trust that feeling.
Leah’s voice broke the silence, softer now. “Have you talked to him about it?” You sighed, closing your eyes briefly as if that might ease the knot in your chest. “He tried last night. But I… I couldn’t. I was too hurt, too angry. I didn’t even know if I could believe him.”
Sofia’s hand found yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I think he’s probably feeling the same, People make decisions that don’t always make sense because they’re worried about what everyone thinks.” You leaned your head back, closing your eyes for a moment as you tried to steady your breathing.
Maybe they were right—maybe it was all just the game getting in your head, Kayla’s pick a calculated move, an attempt to create drama or stir things up. But the memory of Rafe looking away as Sophie announced your single status felt too raw to ignore.
~
Later that morning, as you sat in the makeup room, humming softly to yourself as you applied your skincare, a knock sounded at the door. The other girls exchanged glances, then called out, “Yeah, we’re dressed!” The door creaked open, and Rafe peeked in, his gaze instantly landing on you. He lingered in the doorway, holding a tray with coffee and breakfast.
“Hey,” he said quietly, his expression somewhere between hopeful and tentative. “Brought you breakfast.“ You blinked, caught off guard by the gesture. “Thanks,” you replied softly, surprised at how sincere he looked, how he seemed to truly want to make up for the night before. He set the tray down beside you and took a step back, as if unsure whether he should stay.
“Could we… talk?” he asked, his gaze flickering to the other girls, who quickly exchanged sympathetic glances. Leah gave you a small nod, then ushered everyone else out with a quiet, “Alright, let’s go, girls.” You sent her a grateful look as they slipped out, leaving you alone with Rafe.“Can I sit?” he asked, watching you closely, his eyes searching for any sign of welcome.
You nodded, and he pulled up a chair, watching you as you took a sip of coffee. It was exactly how you liked it, and that little detail twisted something in your chest. Neither of you spoke for a moment, the silence thick with unspoken words. Finally, he sighed, running a hand through his hair as he struggled to meet your eyes.
“I need you to believe me,” he began, his voice barely above a whisper. “I swear, I didn’t think she’d actually pick me. I thought I’d made it clear I wasn’t interested.” You looked away, biting down on the emotions that threatened to spill over. “Rafe, you don’t understand. You were there, comforting me, telling me everything was fine… and then she chose you. It felt like a slap in the face.”
He nodded, his expression pained. “I know. And I’m so sorry. I tried to make it clear to her, but I should’ve done more. I shouldn’t have let her think there was even a chance. I just… I don’t want to lose you over this.” For the first time, his words began to chip away at your hurt. His eyes held that raw sincerity, the vulnerability that he rarely let anyone see.
And as much as you wanted to cling to the anger, to shield yourself from the fear of being hurt again, a part of you knew he was being honest. You bit your lip, studying his face as he spoke, trying to gauge his sincerity. He looked back at you, a hint of desperation in his gaze that you couldn’t ignore. “You have to believe me,” he continued, voice almost a whisper. “I don’t want anyone else. It’s just you.”
Your shoulders relaxed, the anger ebbing slightly, though the doubt was still there. “Okay, Rafe,” you said finally, your tone soft but uncertain. “But actions speak louder than words. If you really mean it, you’ll have to prove it.” He nodded earnestly, relief flickering in his eyes as he reached for your hand.
“I will,” he promised. “I’ll prove it every single day if I have to. Just… give me a chance.” You nodded, feeling the weight of his words settle over you. He gave your hand a gentle squeeze, then smiled—a genuine, soft smile that reminded you of all the moments that had made you fall for him in the first place. “Finish your breakfast,” he murmured, nodding toward the tray. “I’ll be right here.”
#love island!rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#fanfiction#rafe cameron x you#outer banks#obx fanfiction#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron imagine#rafe obx#rafe cameron smut#outer banks fanfiction#rafe outer banks#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x female reader#drew starkey#drew starkey x y/n#rafe cameron x kook!reader#drew starkey x reader#rafe cameron au#rafe cameron angst#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron outer banks#outerbanks x reader#rafe fanfiction#rafe imagine#rafe cameron and you#rafe cameron and y/n#rafe cameron and reader
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sylus x reader (fluffy,angsty?)
summary: “During a mission, I sustained serious injuries and was hospitalized. Though Sylus couldn’t visit me, he sent Mephisto in his place. When I was discharged, I wasn’t expecting him to be outside.”
“I’m not going to lie to you two.” Jenna said, folding her arms across her chest as she leaned back against her desk. “This mission isn’t like the others we’ve done. That facility is more unstable than we initially thought. The few teams we’ve sent to investigate before found nothing at all.”
Crossing my arms as I studied Captain Jenna’s face.
“So why send just the two of us, then?” I asked.
“Why not a full squad if it’s that dangerous?”
“Because we don’t know exactly what we’re dealing with. A bigger team could draw too much attention.“
“And if we find something… unexpected?” Tara asked.
“You report back immediately.” Jenna said, her tone firm. “Don’t try to take on anything alone if it’s beyond your capabilities. This isn’t about being heroes.”
There was a beat of silence before Jenna pushed off her desk and took a step closer to me and Tara. “But you’re not going in blind. We’ll have a team on standby if things get too hot. You need to trust your instincts and watch each other’s backs.”
Glancing at Tara, she gave me a reassuring nod.
Tara and I turned to leave, but Jenna’s voice stopped us just before we reached the door. “And remember.” she called out, “If things start to go sideways, you get out. Do you hear me?”
“Loud and clear.” I replied, glancing over my shoulder at her.
With that, Tara and I exited the office, both of us knowing that we were walking into something dangerous. But we had our orders.
———————————————————————
The facility loomed over us, the metal creaking with the weight of its own decay. Tara and I moved cautiously through the halls, weapons at the ready, our footsteps echoing against the cracked concrete.
Dust hung in the air like a fog, making each breath feel heavy. We’d been searching for signs of Wanderers for hours, but aside from a few ominous claw marks on the walls, there was nothing.
Tara walked a few paces ahead, her sharp eyes sweeping the darkened corners as she scanned for any signs of movement.
“This place gives me the creeps.”
“The readings are coming from this sector.” I confirmed. “It’s like there’s a cluster of energy sources in the storage area up ahead. Something’s definitely drawing them here.”
Tara nodded and pushed forward, keeping a steady pace as we approached the large metal door that led to the storage room. She placed a hand on the door’s surface, glancing back at me. “On three?” she whispered.
I tightened my grip on my gun and gave her a quick nod. “On three.”
“One… two… three!”
Tara shoved the door open, and we moved inside in a swift, coordinated motion. The room was just as the rest of the facility, old crates and equipment lay scattered across the floor, and the walls were covered in peeling paint.
I took a step forward, my eyes sweeping the room for any signs of movement. But then, there was a flicker of motion in the shadows, too quick to pinpoint at first.
I turned to Tara, but she had already seen it. Her eyes narrowed, and she raised her weapon in the direction of the disturbance.
“Stay sharp.” she said, voice tense. “I think we’ve got company.”
I reacted on instinct, surging forward to intercept it with a gunshot.
It swiped at me with one of its jagged claws, forcing me to block the strike with my forearm. Pain shot through my body as its claws tore through my sleeve and left deep gashes across my skin.
Before we could even do anything, the wanderer let out a loud roar and smashed its claws against the support beams around us. A low rumble vibrated through the building, and the ground beneath us trembled. Dust rained down from the ceiling, and a series of cracks split the concrete walls, spreading out in every direction.
“Get out of here, now!” Tara shouted, sprinting for the exit.
I turned to follow her, but the ground heaved under my feet, and a section of the ceiling gave way with a deafening crash. I stumbled and fell, barely managing to roll out of the way as a massive metal beam slammed down where I’d been standing. The room shuddered violently, and the walls seemed to cave inward.
“Tara!” I called out, but my voice was drowned out by the roar of collapsing debris. I saw her struggling to keep her footing near the exit, but then another tremor hit, and a cascade of rubble came crashing down, forcing us apart.
I fought to keep moving, dodging falling beams and lunging over shifting pieces of debris. But it was no use. The floor buckled beneath me, and I felt myself falling through the collapsing structure.
The impact knocked the wind from my lungs, and pain exploded through my side as I hit the ground hard. I tried to move, but my legs were pinned beneath a heavy chunk of concrete, and the darkness quickly closed in around me.
The last thing I saw before everything faded was the shattered remnants of the facility above, crumbling like a house of cards. Then, there was nothing.
———————————————————————
The steady beep of a heart monitor was the first thing I became aware of as I drifted back to consciousness.
The world came back in hazy fragments, a faint antiseptic smell, the dull ache radiating through my entire body, the blinding white light overhead. I blinked slowly, the ceiling tiles came into focus. I was in a hospital room, covered in bandages, and every muscle felt like it had been dragged through hell.
A groan escaped my lips as I tried to shift into a more comfortable position. The movement must have caught someone’s attention because I heard a chair scrape back and then footsteps rushing closer.
“Hey, hey, take it easy.” It was Tara’s voice, low and familiar, filled with a relief I hadn’t heard from her often. She came into view, her face creased with worry. Her eyes softened when she saw I was awake, and she let out a breath that sounded like she’d been holding it for a long time. “You’re finally awake. How are you feeling?”
I managed to lift my head just enough to give her a weary look. “Like I got hit by a train.” I rasped, my voice rough from disuse. “What happened to me?”
“You were inside when the building collapsed.” she explained, pulling a chair closer and sitting down beside me. “By the time we got a rescue team in there, you were unconscious and pinned under the debris.” Tara’s voice wavered slightly, and she quickly looked away, as if embarrassed to show how much the whole thing had shaken her.
“You’ve been out for a while.” Her tone was a little lighter now, a hint of humor breaking through. “Can’t believe you’d scare me like that. Do you know how annoying it was waiting around here?”
A faint chuckle escaped me, though it quickly turned into a wince.
“I should let the doctors know you’re awake. They’ll want to check you over.”
I gave a slow nod, already feeling exhaustion pulling at me again, but I didn’t want her to worry. “Go ahead.” I murmured. “I’m not going anywhere.”
As the door clicked shut behind her, the room fell silent again, and I found myself staring at the ceiling, fighting the familiar feeling of emptiness that came whenever I was alone. I closed my eyes and let out a slow breath.
I wished Sylus were here. There was no way he could just walk into a hospital like any normal person.
I was about to close my eyes again when I heard a soft tapping on the window. My eyes snapped open, and my heart skipped a beat as I turned toward the sound. There, perched on the narrow ledge just outside the window, was a black crow. Mephisto.
I struggled to sit up, limping a little as I reached out to unlock the window. It slid open with a creak, and Mephisto hopped inside, a small bundle of wildflowers clutched in his beak. They were ragged and windblown, a little wilted from the journey, but I could tell they’d been picked carefully.
I took the flowers gently from Mephisto’s beak, my hands trembling slightly. There was a small note tied around the stems with a piece of dark string. I untied it and read the familiar handwriting: “Since I can’t be there. Take care of yourself. – S.”
Sylus couldn’t come to see me himself, but he’d sent Mephisto instead. His way of saying he was there, still watching over me.
“Thank you.” I whispered
Mephisto tilted its head and gave a soft caw, as if acknowledging my words. Then, it took off out the window again.
I sank back against the pillows, holding the flowers close. It wasn’t the same as having Sylus here in person, but it was enough to know he was thinking of me.
———————————————————————
As I lay in the hospital bed, I reached for my phone on the side table and unlocked the screen. My fingers trembled slightly as I typed out a message to Sylus.
I hit send and waited, my heart beating a little faster than it should. The minutes dragged on, and I started to wonder if he'd even seen my message. But then, my device buzzed with his reply.
Typical Sylus.
The response came almost instantly, as though he'd been expecting my question.
I glanced back at the window, half expecting to see the crow still there. It made sense. Mephisto had always kept an eye on me, by Sylus’s command.
I stared at the screen, my chest tightening as I read his words.
There was a long pause before his next message arrived.
It was the closest thing to comfort I would get from him, even if he couldn't be here with me.
———————————————————————
The final paperwork was a blur, the nurse’s instructions fading in and out as I focused on keeping steady. I was bandaged up and aching from head to toe, but at least I was getting out of the hospital. They’d wanted to keep me a few days longer, but I’d insisted on leaving.
As soon as they handed me my things, I slipped into my jacket and headed outside.
When I pushed through the front doors, a figure was leaning casually against the side of the building, half hidden in the shadow cast by the streetlamp. Sylus. He looked up when he saw me.
“Sylus…” I said, managing a small smile as I walked over, but his expression was tense as he straightened up, his eyes quickly scanning over my injuries.
“You’re stubborn for a hunter.” he muttered, his tone flat, though I could tell by the way his eyes lingered on my face and my bandaged arm that he was probably worried.
“The hell are you doing out here so soon? You could barely stand a few hours ago.”
“They were going to keep me trapped in there another week,” I said, trying to sound lighter than I felt. “I couldn’t just stay there doing nothing.”
He gave me a sharp look, he slipped his arm around my shoulders, guiding me firmly to his car parked a few feet away.
“You’re barely out, and here you are, thinking you’re ready to run around already.”
I tilted my head, raising an eyebrow.
"Since when do you drive anything other than that death trap of yours?"
"Since I figured you might not be up for riding around on a motorcycle after getting half crushed under a building."
He helped me into the passenger seat, taking extra care to ensure I was settled in before closing the door. He didn’t say anything as he walked around and got in himself, but the silence felt heavy, like he was holding back from saying a thousand things.
We drove through the streets in silence until we reached the edge of the city. I realized where we were going the moment we turned onto a narrow road.
“Your place?” I asked, glancing over at him.
He kept his gaze on the road. “You’re not going home alone in that condition. Not happening.”
I knew better than to argue, so I just nodded.
When we finally arrived, he was already at my side, opening the car door before I could even move. I tried to slide out on my own, but he offered his hand, steady and warm, and before I could argue, he was lifting me out of the seat.
I groaned, shaking my head. “Sylus, I can walk. You don’t need to—”
“Too late, sweetie.” he smirked, his arms sliding under my legs as he pulled me up, holding me effortlessly in a bridal carry. “Just sit back and let me do this.”
I sighed, trying to hide the warmth creeping up my face. “I’m tough, you know.”
“I know you are.” He glanced down, a glint of amusement in his eyes as he carried me toward the door. “But you’re hurt, and besides,” he added, leaning closer, his voice softening, “sometimes, you need someone to take care of you.”
Inside, he led me to his room and gestured for me to sit on the bed. “Wait here. And don’t try moving around.”
I managed a small, sarcastic smile. “What, you think I’m going to run off?”
His gaze darkened. “You have a habit of being reckless.”
Before I could respond, he was already disappearing into the other room, returning moments later with a small first aid kit and a glass of water. He knelt beside me, unwrapping some of the bandages on my arm with practiced precision.
“I already saw the doctors for this.” I said, watching him closely. He ignored me, dabbing disinfectant on a fresh cut and glancing up with a glint of warning in his eyes.
“Clearly, they didn’t do a good enough job if you’re in this condition.” he replied, his tone clipped.
I sighed, not bothering to respond. Instead, I watched his hands move, careful but efficient, his expression focused as he replaced the bandages. He was so quiet, so steady, so… unlike his usual self. His eyes kept flicking up to meet mine, only for a second, before going back to my injuries.
“You don’t have to do this, you know.” I murmured, not sure if I was talking to him or to myself.
He paused, his hands stilling for a moment, before he looked up, his expression unreadable. “And if I don’t, who will?”
I watched him as he worked, watching how he gently wrapped fresh gauze around my arm, tightening it carefully.
His fingers lingered over the bandage, as if making sure it wasn't too tight.
"Is this too tight?" he murmured, his gaze flicking up to meet mine.
"No... it's fine." I whispered, feeling my heart hammering in my chest. My words were barely a breath, and I wasn't sure if he heard me, but he continued anyway, his focus unbreakable.
"You can tell me if it hurts." he said softly, his gaze locking onto mine.
"It doesn't hurt." I replied, trying to keep my voice steady. But the truth was, all I can think about is how his fingers felt against my skin.
“You could have been killed.” he suddenly said, the faintest tremor in his voice. “And you didn’t think to tell me, or anyone, what you were dealing with out there?”
I looked down, feeling that familiar pang of guilt again.
“Tell me next time before you go off on one of these suicide missions.” he snapped, his jaw tight. “Or better yet, stay out of places where buildings collapse on you.”
“I don’t get to pick and choose which missions are dangerous.” I replied.
“And I’m supposed to sit back and just watch you throw yourself into the line of fire?” His voice was low, but I could hear the worry simmering beneath it.
He was silent for a moment, his expression hardening as he reached over to brush a strand of hair from my face.
“And next time, you’re telling me about this kind of mission. I don’t care if you think it’s nothing.”
My expression softened as I looked up at him
“I’m okay now.” I whispered.
He stared at me for a moment before he gave a reluctant nod.
“Try to rest here. I’ll get you some fresh clothes.” he said, guiding her down gently. “I’m guessing you don’t want to stay in those all night.”
I took the bundle of soft, comfortable clothes he offered.
“Thank you, Sylus.”
His lips quirked into a gentle smile, running his fingers lightly through my hair, guiding me to lie back against the bed.
“Enough fighting it, sweetie.” he murmured, his voice low and soothing. “You need to rest.”
I started to protest, but he pressed a finger gently to my lips, shaking his head. “No arguments,” he said softly. “Just close your eyes.”
He pulled a blanket over me, his hands lingering as he tucked it around my shoulders, and as my breathing slowed, I felt his fingers brush my cheek, tracing gentle patterns along my skin. The last thing I saw was him watching me, his expression filled with something I couldn’t quite place, a mix of worry, relief, and maybe… something else, something deeper.
“Sleep.” he whispered, his voice a barely audible murmur. “I’m not going anywhere.”
———————————————————————
The soft rise and fall of her breathing filled the room. Sylus sat beside her, one leg folded over the other, his arms crossed as he watched her sleep. In the dim light, she looked peaceful, a stark contrast to the worry that had been etched into her face earlier. He’d seen her like this before years ago.
He could still remember that night, when she’d slipped through his fingers.
He reached out almost instinctively, brushing his fingers against her cheek. She didn’t stir, but his touch softened, lingering there, feeling the warmth of her skin against his fingertips.
Unable to bear it, he slipped his arms around her, drawing her close, careful not to wake her. She was warm, her head resting against his chest, her body relaxed in his embrace. He pressed his cheek against her hair, letting himself take in her scent, the steady beat of her heart.
“You don’t get to do this to me again.” he whispered, his voice rough, barely audible even to himself. “Not this time. I won’t lose you. Not again.”
if you made it this far thank you sm for reading! I appreciate you feel free to request ♡
#lads#love and deepspace#lads x reader#lads mc#sylus x reader#otome game#lads sylus#love and deep space x reader#sylusposting#fanfic#sylus x mc#sylus qin#sylus x you#lnds sylus#l&ds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#sylus#l&ds x reader#x reader#lads zayne#lads xavier#lnds#l&ds rafayel#l&ds#love and deepspace x reader#dating sim#lads rafayel#xavier x reader#秦彻#恋与深空
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Kinktober Day 31: Threesome
[kinktober masterlist.]
🔞 warning: smut below! mdni.
pairing: Han Jisung x Lee Felix x reader
•
You’re not certain you’ve ever witnessed a friendship quite as comfortably intimate as that of Jisung and Felix’s. They’re inseparable in every sense of the word- finishing each other's sentences, always in each other’s spaces- and by default, always in your space. And it’s hardly a bother to you, who welcomes your boyfriend’s best friend with open arms, never having taken issue with their close proximity. They radiate pure sunshine all the same, almost stranger to the concept of jealousy. Your friends like to joke that you might as well be dating both of them- a concept you wouldn’t take issue with, either.
As Felix hoists his lanky figure over the mattress, assuming a spot beside you and propping one leg out over your legs, you maintain a knowing smile on your face, meeting Jisung’s gaze beside you. He shoots you a smile, too, glancing contentedly between your expression, and then Felix’s, scooting his body a little closer to yours on your bed, that’s just barely big enough for the three of you.
Jisung leans forward to press a chaste kiss to your forehead, rubbing his thumb back and forth over your shoulder in soothing motions, and then he glance at Felix, who reaches over to intertwine his fingers with yours.
“Are you staying the night again?” Jisung questions, craning his neck to catch sight of Felix’s gaze.
“I wanted to. If that’s okay?”
Jisung chuckles lightly, his lips pulling back to flash him a toothy grin, before getting comfortable on his pillow again.
“That’s fine,” Jisung replies. “Though I was hoping we’d get a little alone time for a bit.”
“Alone time?” Felix voices, his eyebrows furrowing in a confused state. “Just us?”
“Me and my girlfriend,” Jisung corrects him, chuckling lightly as he speaks.
“Jisung,” you interject, hitting him lightly as a scoff escapes your lips.
“What? It’s true. We just haven’t… done anything, in a little bit.”
“Because of me?” Felix questions, sitting up to shoot you an apologetic look. “I can just leave, if that’s-”
“No,” you’re quick to say, shaking your head at him. “Stay. He’s just being annoying.”
“Annoying?” Jisung teases, sitting up to hover over you, before leaning in to press a sweet kiss to your lips. “It’s annoying that I want to satisfy my girlfriend?”
He’s not discrete with his motions, his hand traveling down to part your legs as though he’s going to undress you right here. And Felix’s hand remains intertwined with yours, watching the events unfold as Jisung does in fact tug down the waistband of your pajama pants, to reveal your lace panties.
Felix’s nervous gaze remains fixed on your crotch, observing the way you squirm helplessly under Jisung’s figure when he ruts his hips lightly against yours to reveal that he’s already rock hard beneath his own flannel pajama bottoms.
“I always say black lace is her color,” Jisung tells Felix, looping a finger through your waistband. “But she’s typically more partial to red, or even pink, sometimes.”
“I’ll just go,” Felix practically interrupts, though he can’t seem to look away, swallowing nervously when Jisung’s hands travel down to his own pants, lowering just enough to free his throbbing erection. Perhaps he’d tell Felix to leave and give you both some privacy, if he wasn’t somehow more aroused at the thought of him bearing witness to all of it.
Jisung begins to trail a finger along his own boxers now, eager to do something about his massive hard-on, but before he can, Felix sits up in a panic. You mirror his actions, sitting up beside him as you watch his panicked gaze flicker between the two of you.
“Don’t go,” is all you can say, tightening your grasp around his fingers. “Please.”
Jisung’s curious gaze meets Felix’s, as he nods in agreement, and then before you can say anything else, he’s leaning forward in front of you to near Felix.
Felix doesn’t protest when Jisung finally kisses him, nothing more than a simple peck of his lips, and it’s so sudden that Felix hardly has time to close his eyes before Jisung is retracting once more.
“Yeah,” Jisung voices quietly. “Don’t go.”
You can feel yourself growing wetter at the sight of both men in close proximity to you, their hot breaths practically swirling against your own mouth, which remains parted as you watch them curiously. As if reading your mind, Jisung tilts your face toward him to indulge you in a passionate kiss as Felix watches. When he pulls away once more, Felix doesn’t hesitate to do the same, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek gently, as he presses his lips to yours. He’s a little rougher than Jisung is, a sort of desperation clear in his movements, as though he’s scared you might change your mind. When he pulls away again, he looks a mess, a string of drool trickling down his pouty lips, his freckled cheeks tinted with a pink red blush.
There’s not a word spoken amongst the three of you when you finally kick off your flannel bottoms and discard them beside the bed, effectively bare in just your panties now. Your arms cross over your chest to pull off your knit sweater, revealing the matching lace bra you sport, and Felix’s breath hitches in the back of his throat when he observes the way you near him now, glancing down at his lower half.
Despite the thick sweatpants he wears that seem to swallow his slim figure, he’s very visibly hard for you, squirming awkwardly in his spot when he takes note of you staring. He attempts to make an excuse for the indecency, as his lips part to say something- anything less incriminating than this deafening silence. But his lips part in a futile manner, as his gaze remains locked on yours, nothing but a sharp exhale filling the space between you both.
“You want some help with that?” You ask in a low voice, your gaze flickering briefly over Jisung’s.
Jisung nods encouragingly in your direction, and then sits back on his heels, as you crawl toward Felix, eyeing his throbbing erection. Your hand palms him lightly over the fabric of his pants, earning a little gasp from him- and then a fervent moan, when you finally tug his waistband down in tandem with his boxers. Felix’s cock is already leaky for you, a bead of precum decorating his pink tip, practically begging you to taste him. And when you lean forward to gather your hair into a makeshift ponytail, a sharp breath escaping your parted lips as you near his girth, Felix lets out an involuntary gasp.
“Can I?” You ask Felix, staring up at him through long, fluttering lashes. He shifts in his spot briefly, leaning back on the palms of his hands to gain his balance as you wait patiently for an answer from him. And then he nods once, swallowing nervously.
“Yeah,” Felix responds, nodding a second time, this time with an eagerness to him. “Yes. Please.”
You waste no time taking him in your mouth, letting his slippery girth glide along your tongue until his tip is hitting the back of your throat, earning a light gagging noise from you. And Felix’s groans are guttural as you do, his fingers dipping into the mattress, as he grips onto the white duvet to steady himself.
“She’s good with her mouth, huh?” Jisung chimes in from behind you, a light chuckle escaping his lips.
Felix gasps when his voice fills the air, almost having forgotten Jisung is watching the whole thing unfold. His girlfriend, of god knows how many years, sucking off his best friend. And Jisung enjoys every minute of it, admiring the way your lips wrap around his cock so beautifully, your tongue swirling around the base of his erection to trace the protruding veins.
Felix is no stranger to the reality of the situation, either, admittedly a little nervous at the implications of this when it all concludes. But in the present moment, he can’t care less about why you’ve both agreed to it- not when you’re sucking him off like he’s paying you for the task. And not when he opens his eyes to watch Jisung wrap a hand around his own cock, pumping himself lightly and throwing his head back in pleasure.
Jisung’s eyes travel to Felix’s cock, tilting his head to catch a better glimpse of it. Felix’s girth disappears in the back of your throat, and a symphony of his moans follows as he struggles to catch his balance. Your hands caressing his balls as you devour him, shifting up to pump the base of his cock lightly. And then Jisung scoots closer to you, his vacant hand traveling to rest on the curve of your lower back. He presses down lightly, his large palm sprawled over your tender flesh, as his other hand remains wrapped around the base of his aching cock. And you know the action well already, following his nonverbal command to bend lower and arch your back for him.
Jisung’s lips pull into a satisfied smile when you do, always amused at how obedient you are for him. You know the implications of his actions very well now, having memorized the commands he relays, often through the greediness of his kisses or the caress of your soft skin. He doesn’t have to ask you- he’ll simply run his hand along your spine, and you know to arch for him, parting your thighs as you wait for him to take your cunt. And then he runs his wet tip along your folds lightly from behind, before pushing his cock into you with desperation, an insatiable desire to chase the pleasure Felix is already growing accustomed to.
Felix knows when Jisung finally bottoms out inside of you, because you moan loudly around his girth, a generous trickle of saliva escaping your lips to coat his inner thighs, as Jisung begins to move in and out of you. He pumps mercilessly in and out of your throbbing pussy, both hands now finding purchase on your lower back, as his thumbs rest along the dimples of your lower spine. With every thrust, your throat takes Felix deeper, and deeper, until his tip is kissing your uvula, your lips stretching painfully around his base. Jisung doesn’t remove his gaze from Felix’s, admiring the way his eyebrows arch up in pleasure, an almost pained expression on his face as you work him. He’s seen Felix take pleasure in a hit of weed, or when he’s accidentally walked in on him masturbating to the thought of you. But never like this, never so guilt-ridden, and yet fucked-out, at the same time. It’s clear he’s enjoying this more than even he thought he would, his legs struggling to stay parted as you gag helplessly around him.
And Jisung can’t shake the feeling that it’s always supposed to be like this, the two most important people in his life experiencing this same otherworldly pleasure. Perhaps he’s always thought about Felix sexually, to some degree, certainly no stranger to the beauty of his features and the warmness he exudes. An ever-present urge to just kiss him when he smiles too big, or to ask him to watch the two of you make love just once. It just feels right like this- it just feels complete.
“How does she feel?” Jisung calls out to Felix, cocking his head to get a better view of him.
“She feels- so- fucking good,” Felix voices breathlessly, gripping the sheets a little tighter. “I think I’m gonna cum.”
Jisung chuckles as he quickens his pace again, pounding into you with an almost painful force now, the sound of skin slapping filling the space between the two of you. The room echoes with gasps for air, Jisung struggling to stave off his own orgasm now, as the pads of his fingers dig into your flesh and imprint little crescent marks.
“Wait for me,” Jisung interjects, hardly able to form a coherent sentence as he pounds into you. “I want to finish with you.”
It’s unclear who Jisung’s even talking to, yet you both obey his command, your legs trembling as you hold off your shared orgasms. Jisung feels his cock twitch once inside of you indicating the near of his release. And before he makes it known, he reaches a hand up to make harsh contact with the curve of your ass, his fingers digging into your flesh with the recoil and gripping your flesh tightly. You let out an involuntary groan when he does, sending a delicious vibration along the length of Felix’s cock, and he shuts his eyes tightly when you do, certain he’s about to finish now.
“I can’t hold it,” Felix exclaims loudly, whimpering moans filling the room as he bucks his hips up toward your mouth. He’s coated in a sheen layer of your spit, beads of sweat gathering along the hairline of his platinum blonde locks as he feels tears prick the corners of his eyes. At first he takes them to be perspiration, quickly realizing that he’s in fact crying from the pleasure, when the tears graze his freckled face to then descend toward his chiseled jawline.
The pleasure is dizzying in all three directions- your pussy contracting desperately around Jisung’s cock, as he angles himself a little higher to graze your cervix now. The shared pleasure of Felix’s cock relishing in the sensation of your drooly lips, the same way Jisung’s cock disappears in and out of your tight cunt. And when Jisung’s cock twitches once more inside of you, he can no longer hold it, either, letting out a stifled moan, as he meets Felix’s gaze.
“Cum,” Jisung commands simply, slowing his thrusts inside of you to properly feel every inch of your warm cunt. “Finish in her mouth. Let her taste you.”
Felix can’t even respond before he’s gripping the sheets for dear life now, throwing his head back as he finally shoots thick white ropes of his cum down the back of your throat. You can hardly swallow when Jisung resumes pounding into you, and in the brief moment he waits for you both to finish, too, Felix lunges forward to capture your lips in a kiss, one hand wrapping around your throat to bring your face up to his. Your lips are a mess of spit and semen, trickling down the sides of your mouth and bubbling with every harsh thrust of Jisung’s cock slamming into you. Felix’s tongue darts out to gather the mixture along his own lips- salty, as he’d envisioned it. And then his deep voice vibrates against the back of your throat when he speaks against you.
“Cum for him,” Felix says to you, forcing your gaze onto his. “I wanna watch him fill you.”
Jisung’s hand reaches out to gather your hair in the palm of his hand, tugging harshly, your head pulling back as he quickens his pace again. Your eyes roll in the back of your head as he thrusts into you particularly deep- and then his warm load finally fills you, as he spills his seed into you, his cum gushing out of your still-aching cunt as he slows his thrusts.
Your body throbs with a pleasurable ache as you feel yourself reach your orgasm just seconds after, trembling helplessly around his cock, your own fluids mixing into his and making a mess onto the sheets below you. When Jisung finally pulls out, he glances at Felix, who sits up on his knees beside you. Jisung mirrors the action on the other side of you, his broad chest rising and falling as he attempts to catch his breath, unable to utter a word, simply allowing heavy sighs to fill the room.
It’s Felix who lunges forward to kiss Jisung in front of you, pressing his lips eagerly against his, making a mess of Jisung’s pouty lips with a mixture of your saliva and his own arousal. Jisung kisses back just as desperately, a soft moan escaping into Felix’s mouth as he runs his tongue along Felix’s lower lip. And then he pulls away to kiss you, too, the same eager passion present in the way his lips work against yours.
It’s a sloppy exchange of kisses for several passing minutes- Jisung kissing you, turning to kiss Felix again, allowing the two of you to kiss. At one point, you’re certain the three of you are caught in a three way tangle of tongue kisses, hands grabbing desperately at each other and letting pleasured sighs echo around the room.
And when you pull away to catch your breath again, they’re replaced by shared laughter amongst the three of you, satisfied and restful.
Implications of several more rounds- and perhaps some confessions to be shared, lie ahead for the evening. But for now, more pleasured sighs, bodies yearning desperately for each other and the desire to stay right here, exactly like this.
#stray kids#skz#skz smut#stray kids hard hours#stray kids hard thoughts#felix stray kids#Lee Felix smut#Han Jisung smut#skz scenarios#skz han#Jisung skz#han jisung hard thoughts#han jisung hard hours#han jisung skz#han jisung fanfic#Lee Felix fanfic#han jisung fic#han jisung x reader#Han Jisung#Lee Felix#Lee Felix x reader#skz hard thoughts#skz hard hours#skz fanfic#skz felix#stray kids jisung#stray kids smut#kinktober#kinktober day 31#Moonjxsung’s kinktober
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reblogging comment review from @zyafics
guess who has to be studying for another exam but instead she needs to catch up on this fic? (this girl) little annotations below ⬇️
Or the next. You couldn’t. Every time you picked up one of the stupid boxes, your heart would drop to the pits of hell and your hands would start sweating. You’d shove it back in the drawer like it could disappear if you just ignored it hard enough.
manifest it girlypop
What if it was positive? Then what? The thought of seeing his name pop up on your phone after you blocked him, or worse, hearing her voice if she picked up...you’d rather die. He didn't deserve to know.
i eat up any scenes where she wants nothing to do with him and he barges into her life and finds out all the things he's been missing out? the angst of not being able to go backward in time no matter how much you regret it
You heard that voice in your head, the one that sounded like your mom, at least what you remembered from watching old videos.
i would burst out in tears
Your younger cousin, Topper the bitching backstabber, had been born and raised in Los Angeles before he moved to Figure 8 when he was five.
i was like why r we bringing up topper's bitch ass here and then i realized it to put in a frame of reference that she couldn't possibly know topper's birth bc he moved to kildare later. i just thought reader needed to put in a quick jab about topper 😭
You weren’t exactly the picture of health. What if you weren’t strong enough? What if something went wrong, and you ended up in a hospital bed, alone, because Rafe sure as fuck wouldn’t be there. It was just you.
i love the spiral of madness. i'm reading (and analyzing) it and i'm so so amazed by how ur structure descends. it flows so smoothly - from one topic to the next - all at a great pace and with a lot of internal turmoil. it builds up to me feeling everything reader feels.
It hit you just how ironic this was. You were sitting here, freaking out about being possibly pregnant, scrolling through nightmare stories about abortion and pregnancy complications, while Lily was talking about a fundraiser for children’s health. Kids. It felt like some twisted repulsive joke the universe was playing on you.
ugh, i love the parallels between her being (potentially) pregnant and the idea that she has to wrap her life around this foundation for children.
The fucking nerve. To your gala. Your blood boiled instantly, your fingers gripping the phone so tight you almost cracked the screen.
i love her i feel like she inches closer to insanity every day and i, too, feel the same
If Rafe wanted to play games, you’d ruin his life if you had to. He thought he could fuck you over, leave you with all this—leave you with nothing? No. You weren’t going to let him have that power.
like i said
You were shaking now, but it almost felt good. Even if it was just a stupid guest list. Let him find out when he got there and there was no table for him. No seat. No fucking room.
BABES 😭 YOU'RE CARRYING HIS CHILD oh this is too good, the idea that she wants to erase him from her life and leave no space for him (mind), but her body is accommodating spacefor his child, making her reserve a permanent space for him in her life
Every year. He’d sit with you while you struggled through every word, telling you it was okay to take your time, reminding you that you didn’t have to do it if you didn’t want to. And when the gala came, he was always by your side, standing just off stage, waiting for you after the speech was done. You’d run into his arms, and he’d whisper that you 'did great baby', holding you until the room stopped spinning so much.
i fear i would crash out if i am currently stressed with the idea of being pregnant and remembering my ex bf and remembering my lost parents
If he thought you were weak, if he thought he could break you, if he thought you were the same girl who used to cling to him like he was the only thing keeping you together—he was wrong.You were going to do this without him.
my boss baby!!!
There was a sigh on the other end, the sound of him trying to not to lose his patentience, like he was the one in the right here. Typical Topper. Always wanting to smooth things over, play peacemaker between you and Rafe, like this was just another fight you’d get over.
topper, in the words of reader, a bitching BACKSTABBER
“Maybe what? That he could swoop in and save the day?” You let out a bitter laugh. “He’s not your golden boy, Top. He doesn’t fix anything. He ruins things.”
ugh i love ur dialogues sosososo much
You were having a meltdown, and he’d stepped in, like he always did when you went off the rails. That was the problem with him—he cared, even when you didn’t want him to. He was family, the only family you had left, and he was too loyal for his own good.
so fuck his parents then ig
You sat down, staring at the stick in your hand. This was insane. You were insane. Who the fuck took a pregnancy test ten minutes before they’re supposed to host a charity gala?
apparently me
There it was.
+
💌 — aaaaaaaaaa, i'm so glad i waited until after my exam to read this and truly experience the gift of ur writing. i love the juxtaposition and parallels in this scene! especially with her deleting rafe from the gala's list, erasing space from him in her life, but having his child grow inside of her. i love love how she has to have a gala for children—and crippling over the current dilemma of whether she has a child herself. and i love that she's very isolated in a sense, because it amplifies how this child can truly make or break her. topper was so enjoyable—especially their conversation. u always write dialogues so smoothly!! honestly, i thought this scene would end with rafe showing up unannounced at the gala, haha but ig we'll see in next chapter
LOVED YOU AT YOUR WORST - r.c series - TWO
pairings: ex!sweethearts; rafe x thornton!reader; rafe x sofia. chapter warnings: mentions of possible pregnancy, of abortion, of pregnancy risks & death. self-loathing. chapter one
You lied.
You didn’t take the tests the next day.
Or the next. You couldn’t. Every time you picked up one of the stupid boxes, your heart would drop to the pits of hell and your hands would start sweating. You’d shove it back in the drawer like it could disappear if you just ignored it hard enough.
Once you knew, you knew.
There was no more pretending as if nothing happened.
No more pretending like you didn't care that Rafe moved on like he didn’t just dump you, with no real closure and ran to the next girl he found.
Fuck, why did he have to look so happy that night? He got to be carefree, living his perfect little life with her, and you were there, sitting on the bathroom floor, too scared to even pee on a stick.
What if it was positive? Then what? The thought of seeing his name pop up on your phone after you blocked him, or worse, hearing her voice if she picked up...you’d rather die. He didn't deserve to know.
He didn't deserve anything from you anymore.
You started googling abortion clinics before you even touched the tests. You could afford it. That wasn’t even the issue.
You had more money than you knew what to do with. Your inheritance was just sitting there. You could book a flight tomorrow, pay for whatever procedure, whatever it took—fly out of state, out of the country, if you had to.
But that wasn’t the point. It has never been about the money. It was the overwhelming shame. The fear. The realization that Rafe might have left you, but he was still there, stuck in your head, in your body, in your fucking life. Even when he wasn’t.
He didn’t have to worry about any of this. He was most likely out on the boat, not even thinking about you. Not thinking about what he did to you.
And you— you were left with this. Sitting on a bathroom floor for hours a day, trying to figure out how you were supposed to make a decision that changed everything.
You started looking up clinics again, scrolling through the options, but your mind was barely even there. It was legal in North Carolina for now, but you read something about the 12-week ban they passed in June, and suddenly you were spiraling one more time, wondering how much time you even had.
Could you wait? Could you put it off like you’d been putting off the tests, like if you waited long enough, maybe the problem would just... disappear? Shit, wouldn’t that be easier?
You heard that voice in your head, the one that sounded like your mom, at least what you remembered from watching old videos.
It was depressing how life didn’t let you hold tightly to your memories sometimes. She always reminded you of the kind of person you were supposed to be. The type of girl who had her shit together. The type of girl who didn’t get herself into situations like this, in the first place.
But instead, you were the girl who lost everything—the life you were supposed to have—and somehow, you’d still found a way to screw up what was left.
You kept scrolling like you couldn’t stop.
One page led to another, and soon you weren’t just looking up clinics—you were looking up everything.
What happened during the procedure, how long it took, the side effects, the complications. You read horror stories about infections, about women who thought it was over and then bled for weeks, about people who changed their minds too late.
You even looked up what could happen if you didn’t get an abortion—what pregnancy could do to your body. And that was a whole other rabbit hole you didn’t need to go down. Your body changing, your hormones going insane. You thought about your boobs getting sore, your stomach stretching, the possibility of throwing up every morning, and it felt like your body was already betraying you. And then you read the serious stuff—gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, all these words you didn’t even know existed before that night. There was a minefield of things that could go wrong, things that would go wrong.
Complications. Risks. Dangers.
You read about women who almost died in labor. About miscarriages and stillbirths and the trauma of carrying a baby for months, only to lose it. You never even thought about that, how pregnancy wasn’t just this smooth, magical process people make it out to be. It was brutal. But you’d been the little sister, you never saw your mother go through it, or anyone for that matter.
Your younger cousin, Topper the bitching backstabber, had been born and raised in Los Angeles before he moved to Figure 8 when he was five.
You were terrified—not just of being pregnant, but of what it meant to stay pregnant. Would your body even handle it? You’d always lived off coffee and takeout half the time. An unreasonable amout of parties. Too many drinks some nights.
You weren’t exactly the picture of health. What if you weren’t strong enough? What if something went wrong, and you ended up in a hospital bed, alone, because Rafe sure as fuck wouldn’t be there. It was just you.
For a second there, you thought you might pass out.
You’d thrown your phone across the room, it hit the wall with a thud, but it didn’t help. The anxiety was still there, vibrating under your skin, making you want to scream. You glanced at the bathroom drawer again, where the pregnancy tests were hidden like some cursed thing.
Maybe you should’ve just taken one.
Rip off the bandaid.
The stupid phone rang, like was having fun pissing you off, vibrating on the floor where you’d thrown it. You stared at it for a second, debating if you should even pick it up. You didn’t feel like dealing with anyone, especially not whoever was about to ask something from you.
But it kept ringing, and of course, it was a number you recognized—Lily, one of the coordinators from your dad’s foundation. Shit. You forgot about the gala. Again. The one that was happening in two freaking days, the one you haven’t even thought about preparing for.
You swiped to answer, “Yeah?”
“Hey, I didn’t want to bother you, but we need to go over the final details for the gala,” She greeted you, sounding way too perky for how you were feeling. “I really need your input on the seating arrangements, and the auction items, and—”
It hit you just how ironic this was. You were sitting here, freaking out about being possibly pregnant, scrolling through nightmare stories about abortion and pregnancy complications, while Lily was talking about a fundraiser for children’s health. Kids. It felt like some twisted repulsive joke the universe was playing on you.
You blinked back into the conversation, realizing she still talking, and you hadn’t said a word. “Uh, yeah, sorry. I’ve been busy. Can you just handle it?” you muttered, feeling guilty but not enough to actually deal with any of it.
“I’ve already taken care of most things,” she said carefully, “but we really need your approval on the final guest list and the speech. You’re the face of the foundation, after all.”
The face of the foundation. The legacy your dad left you. It was supposed to be this huge responsibility. And it was. You’d always taken it seriously. The one thing in your life you never ruined. But this year, you hadn’t written the speech yet. Jesus, you forgot it was even happening. And the guest list? No clue.
You rubbed your forehead, “I’ll look at it later. Just send it over.”
Lily hesitated again, probably sensing that something was off, you'd always been a control freak. “Okay, I’ll email it to you. Just let me know by tomorrow, alright?”
“Yeah, sure.”
You hung up before she could add anything else, staring at the ceiling. One more thing. One more responsibility piled on top of everything else. You were drowning in all these expectations—being the good daughter to dead parents, the responsible one, the perfect kook girl who was supposed to have everything. You were supposed to be the girl who had the trust fund, the perfect life, the foundation that helped kids in need.
You earned to be her.
Your phone buzzed again, this time with an email notification. You rolled your eyes, already knowing it was from Lily. She’d sent over the guest list, and you groaned, thinking you’d skim it, give it a half-assed glance, and send it back. But as you scrolled down the names, you stopped.
Rafe Cameron.
Of course, he was going to be there. Why wouldn’t he? His family had been involved in your dad’s foundation for years. It was like you couldn’t escape him.
The fucking nerve. To your gala. Your blood boiled instantly, your fingers gripping the phone so tight you almost cracked the screen.
Fuck him.
If he thought he could just show up and rub his new life in your face, he had another thing coming. Without thinking twice, you deleted his name, erasing him like he didn’t even exist. And then, without checking another name, you sent the list back to Lily.
You didn’t give a shit if it was petty. You didn’t care if it wasn’t professional.
If Rafe wanted to play games, you’d ruin his life if you had to. He thought he could fuck you over, leave you with all this—leave you with nothing? No. You weren’t going to let him have that power.
Not over this. Not over you.
You were shaking now, but it almost felt good. Even if it was just a stupid guest list. Let him find out when he got there and there was no table for him. No seat. No fucking room.
You still sat there staring at the screen with that stupid blinking cursor. The email from Lily sat open in front of you, and somewhere buried in the list of attachments was the speech. Blank.
Your speech—the one you were supposed to read at the gala in two days. The one you hadn’t even started writing.
This was always the hardest part. Writing it. Saying it. You used to cry every time. Standing in front of all those people, talking about your dad, your family, how the foundation was this beautiful way of keeping their memory alive. It was never just a speech—it was like ripping your heart out of your chest and letting everyone see it, year after year. It never got easier.
But Rafe, used to be there with you.
Every year. He’d sit with you while you struggled through every word, telling you it was okay to take your time, reminding you that you didn’t have to do it if you didn’t want to. And when the gala came, he was always by your side, standing just off stage, waiting for you after the speech was done. You’d run into his arms, and he’d whisper that you 'did great baby', holding you until the room stopped spinning so much.
You could still hear his voice in your head sometimes, 'you’re stronger than you think'.
That’s what he always said, even when you didn’t believe it. He’d hold you, kiss your forehead, and make you feel like it was true, like you really could get through it. He was always so sure of you. But this year? He wasn’t going to be there. He’d stop believing the lies he fed you. You were angry. You were seething. You were utterly alone.
You’d been avoiding this moment—writing.
This time around, it wasn’t just about the speech. It was about the fact that when you walked out of that stage, you wouldn’t have him waiting for you.
You’d step down into nothingness, with no one to catch you.
Your fingers hovered over the screen, but they wouldn’t move. What were you even supposed to say this year? How were you supposed to stand up in front of all those people and talk about love and family and legacy when yours was shattered?
You hated looking at yourself in the mirror, feeling like you’d lost every single piece of who you used to be.
Fuck the speech. Fuck the gala. Fuck Rafe Cameron and his stupid lies, his stupid smile, his stupid promises that he never kept.
If he thought you were weak, if he thought he could break you, if he thought you were the same girl who used to cling to him like he was the only thing keeping you together—he was wrong.
You were going to do this without him.
You were going to stand up there and give that speech, no matter how much it hurt. And if it killed you, so be it. You’d still do it.
Because unlike him, you didn’t just walk away from the things that mattered. Even if it tore you apart. Even if it was killing you to keep pretending like you were fine. You weren’t fine. But you’d fake it. You’d fake it until the whole world believed it.
You’d barely hit send on the email when your phone rang again, and this time it wasn’t Lily.
It was Topper. You hadn’t talked to him since that night—the night. The party where you’d found out, where you’d seen Rafe and Sofia together for the first time. Where you realized that everyone knew.
How he’d called Rafe over, like you needed him to fix it, like he was still yours to rely on.
“What?”
“Hey…” Topper’s voice was cautious, “I, uh, I wanted to call and apologize for the other night.”
You snorted, leaning your head back against the wall. “Yeah? For what part? For calling Rafe like his little bitch or for getting in front of my car when I was trying to leave?”
“I didn’t mean to fuck things up. I was just trying to stop you from doing something stupid.”
“Like what?” you snapped. “Leaving the party? Getting out of there before I had to watch him with her for one more second? Yeah, Top, real dumb of me.”
“You almost ran me over,” Topper shot back, his voice rising just a little, like he was offended you hadn’t mentioned that part. “Kinda felt like maybe you weren’t thinking straight.”
“You jumped in front of the car you fucking idiot. What the hell did you expect me to do? Slam on the brakes and listen to whatever bullshit you and Rafe had to say? Because trust me, ’m all out of patience for either of you.”
There was a sigh on the other end, the sound of him trying to not to lose his patentience, like he was the one in the right here. Typical Topper. Always wanting to smooth things over, play peacemaker between you and Rafe, like this was just another fight you’d get over.
He never really got it.
“Look,” Your cousin started, calmer this time, “I didn’t mean to call him. I just thought—”
“You always think calling him will fix things,” you cut in, “Like he’s the answer to every problem I have. He’s not. Not anymore.”
“I get that,” He added quickly, like he was afraid you’d hang up. “But I didn’t know what else to do! You were upset, and I thought maybe—”
“Maybe what? That he could swoop in and save the day?” You let out a bitter laugh. “He’s not your golden boy, Top. He doesn’t fix anything. He ruins things.”
Topper went quiet for a second, probably trying to figure out how to respond without setting you off on an angry rant again. “I get it,” he said finally, “You’re pissed at him. You have every right to be. But I didn’t call him to hurt you, okay? I was worried about you.”
You hated how genuine he sounded, hated that he meant well. He was a nuisance half of the time, sure, but he wasn’t malicious. He never was. He just had terrible judgment.
“Next time, don’t,” you muttered, rubbing a hand over your face. “I don’t need you playing little brother and calling him when things go wrong."
“I wasn’t trying to clean anything up,” Topper explained, a little defensive now. “I just didn’t want you driving like that. You were upset.”
You rolled your eyes. “Upset doesn’t mean I need you or Rafe deciding what’s best for me. I’m not a kid.”
“You’re not,” he agreed, “But you weren’t exactly in a great headspace, so yeah, I stopped you. I wasn’t gonna let you leave like that and end up in a ditch somewhere.”
It hurt like a bitch, because deep down, you knew Topper had a point.
You were having a meltdown, and he’d stepped in, like he always did when you went off the rails. That was the problem with him—he cared, even when you didn’t want him to. He was family, the only family you had left, and he was too loyal for his own good.
“You could’ve told me,” you confessed what had been upsetting you, your voice losing some of its initial attitude. “About them. Instead of letting me walk into that party blind.”
Topper sighed again, “I should’ve,” he admitted. “I didn’t want you to find out like that. But it wasn’t my place to say anything. And I didn’t want to make things worse.”
Your hand instinctively moved to cup your stomach. You didn’t even realize you were doing it at first, but the second your fingers touched your shirt, the earlier panic welled up inside you again. If he only knew how bad things were. How bad they could get. You yanked your hand away like you’d been burned, heart hammering against your ribs most painfully. There was no way you could even begin to explain what was going on inside your head—or your body.
Not to Topper. Not to anyone. If he knew, he’d freak and you didn’t need that right now.
You clenched your jaw, pushing yourself to focus on the conversation, on Topper still yammering on about apologies and guilt You shook your head, a bitter smile tugging at your lips.
“Are you even listening?”
“Unfortunately,” You sounded apathetic even to yourself, fingers tapping against the phone, agitated. “Look, Top, I don’t have time for this right now. I’m busy.”
He sighed. “I know you’re pissed, okay? I get it. But the gala’s in, like, two days. You... you still going, right?”
“Of course I’m going,” you scowled, barely able to hide the bitterness in your voice. “I have to. It’s not like I can just dip out and pretend it’s not happening.”
Unlike some people, you thought, but you bit your tongue.
“Good, because I’ll be there too. And I—”
“Oh, joy,” you interrupted, “Another chance for you to babysit me and make sure I don’t make a scene? Can’t wait.”
“Jesus, I’m just trying to help!” Topper groaned. “I didn’t want to make things worse the other night. I—”
“Yeah. Whatever, I’ll see you at the gala.”
You hung up. You didn’t have the patience to deal with him right now.
The day of the gala came faster than you thought it would.
It was like you blinked, and suddenly, you were standing in the middle of the venue, walking through final checks with Lily, nodding along as she rattled off details you barely absorbed.
The room was all glitz and glamour, with chandeliers dripping from the ceiling, and everything draped in the foundation’s signature gold and white.
Crisp tablecloths. Flowers in perfect, elegant arrangements. Waiters in black-tie uniforms were circulating, making sure everything looked flawless. Flawless.
That word made you want to gag.
You moved through the space like a ghost, smiling at the right moments, giving half-hearted approvals when needed. You didn’t care. People were running around, asking for your opinion on this or that. You’d stayed at the venue longer than planned, making sure everything was in order, but your mind was stuck in that floating-place. You wanted to burn the whole thing down, if you were being honest.
You should’ve called your doctor. Days ago. Hell, maybe weeks ago.
Making smart choices wasn’t your thing lately, was it?
When you finally slipped into the room where they’d set up your glam team, you just wanted to sleep. The room itself was a suite off to the side of the venue, a private space meant to make you feel like royalty.
A massive mirror ran across one wall, surrounded by soft, glowing lights. A table was set up with everything—hair tools, makeup brushes, palettes, serums. Bottles of champagne sat chilled in the corner, the condensation dripping down the glass, untouched. It was the kind of place you were supposed to feel special in.
Normally you did. But this year you were numb.
The stylist worked quietly on your hair, soft curls falling into place as she tugged and pinned each section with meticulous care. The makeup artist was dabbing foundation onto your skin, blending and contouring until you didn’t even recognize yourself in the mirror. The dress hung behind you, a shimmering white gown, custom-designed by Versace for the occasion.
You looked like you were stepping into one of those perfect, glamorous lives. But on the inside, you felt like you were going to lose it at any second. You nodded along, giving tight-lipped smiles when they complimented you, and then they finally left.
The room was dead silent now, just you and your reflection. You stood in front of the mirror, staring at yourself, the perfect curls, the glowy skin, the gown waiting behind you. It all felt wrong. It felt fake. You didn’t bear a resemblance to yourself.
You looked like the version of you that the world expected—the untouchable girl. A doll.
Your rifled through your bag for your phone, but instead, your fingers brushed something else. Cold, hard.
You hadn’t even realized it was in there.
One of the pregnancy tests. You must’ve thrown it in without thinking earlier that morning when you were rushing out the door. You hadn’t even noticed it until now.
What the fuck were you doing?
You had a gala to host in less than an hour. People were going to be looking at you, waiting for you to give the speech, expecting you to hold everything together like always. And there you were, standing in a private dressing room, about to do something so monumentally stupid. Maybe it was the pressure of tonight, or maybe it was the anger you’d been shoving down for weeks, but suddenly, you didn’t care.
You were going to do it.
Without even thinking, you stormed into the bathroom. You were so fucking tired of avoiding this. Tired of pretending like everything was fine, like you were fine.
What the hell was fine about any of this? You tore open the box, hands trembling as you pulled out the test. The room was so quiet, you could hear every little sound—your breath still uneven, the rustle of your dress against the tiles, the click of the test cap as you flicked it off.
You sat down, staring at the stick in your hand. This was insane. You were insane. Who the fuck took a pregnancy test ten minutes before they’re supposed to host a charity gala?
You couldn’t get a proper breath out as you waited, heart pounding so hard it felt like it might rip your chest open. You leaned against the sink, gripping the edge. Your stomach churned, the nausea rising again, and you had to close your eyes to stop the floor from spinning.
What if it was positive? What if it wasn’t?
You stared at the test, willing the result to appear, but it didn’t. Not yet. The little window stayed blank, as if taunting you, making you feel like you were losing your mind. You knew you had to wait longer. You weren’t stupid. You’d read those instructions a million times by now, but you hated waiting.
Hated not knowing.
You couldn’t take your eyes off the stupid little piece of plastic. Just one line or two. That was all it came down to. One fucking line or two, and your entire life would either fall apart or what? Be fine?
You glanced at the mirror, catching another glimpse of yourself, and it almost startled you—your eyes were wild. Desperate. They were the eyes of someone who was just about ready to do anything to get this over with.
You tried to picture telling him again, but the idea alone made you sick. You thought of Sofia, of her perfect smile next to his, and bile rose in your throat. Your hands never stopped shaking. You wanted to run. You wanted to throw that thing in the garbage can and never stare at it again.
Your thoughts spun in circles, going nowhere, just making everything worse. The clock on your phone ticked louder and louder, and you knew—somewhere out there, everyone was getting ready. Guests were arriving. The gala would start soon, and they’d all be waiting for you. Watching you. Expecting you to be the poised, perfect version of yourself you’d spent your whole life pretending to be.
And you were in here, trying not to lose your fucking mind.
You peeked back at it. Still nothing.
No line. No answer.
It felt like you were suspended in time. You closed your eyes, gripping the sink harder, praying for it to end—something to happen, anything.
Then finally, you felt it in your chest—a heavy, sinking feeling, like the moment before a fall.
You opened your eyes.
There it was.
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Bratty (Shin Ryujin & Hwang Yeji x M!Reader)
Part 2 of Troublemaker (Both of these are smut!! Sorry!!!) Y/N is a brat and Ryujin degrades him (Again) to teach him a lesson Word Count: 2,617
As my eighth period class was about to end the professor suddenly made an announcement to the class.
"Before you all leave I wanted to let you all know that you have the option to work with a partner for this assignment."
When he said that I turned to Yeji.
"Hey, want to work on the assignment together?"
"Yeah sure, what's your phone number?"
After we exchanged phone numbers we went our separate ways. I didn't get far as I suddenly felt someone grab my arm and pull me into an empty classroom.
"What was that Y/N?"
"Ryujin? What are you doing?"
"Don't deflect, now tell me what I just saw."
"I was just getting Yeji's phone number."
"For what Y/N? Are you going over to her house?"
"Yes but only-"
Ryujin cut me off and lightly smacked my cheek. She glared at me with eyes that felt like they would pierce my soul.
"Don't go over to her house."
"Why?"
"Don't act dumb Y/N I know what you plan on doing. You're going to shove your face in between her thighs while your over at her house."
"What, No Ryujin I wont't!"
"Yeah sure, Look Y/N you can listen to me or not. But I warn you that if you disobey me you'll pay for it."
Ryujn left and I was alone in the empty classroom.
I felt excitement as I knew my plan was working.
I always wanted Ryujin to be more dominant and degrade me harder so I had started to ignore her and started to act less excited when having sex with her which I guess is why shes been more possessive over me. She might feel like she's doing something wrong which is probably why she thinks I might be looking for other people.
At Yeji's House
I knocked on the door and waited for a response.
After waiting for a few seconds Yeji opened the door for me.
"Hi Y/N are you ready to start working?"
"Sure am Yeji."
Yeji led me to her room and we started working on the assignment. I took this moment and took a photo of Yeji and sent it to Ryujin.
After a few seconds Ryujin sent me a message but I didn't answer her. Ryujin must've not liked me ignoring her messages as my phone started vibrating constantly but I didn't pay attention to it.
"Y/N is that your phone?"
"Yeah why?"
"I think someone's trying to reach you. It sounds important."
"Don't worry about it Yeji."
I went and put me phone on silent.
"Y/N seriously I think it's important. Why would someone message you so much if it wasn't?"
"No it was just a spam message."
"Oh really? Ugh I hate those."
I started wondering about my next move. But I decided upon something I knew would get Ryujin worked up.
"Hey Yeji I know this is a weird time but would you be my girlfriend?"
"Y/N ... where is this coming from?"
"You, your everything Yeji and I want to be able to have you by my side. So will you be mine?"
"Listen Y/N you're a sweet person now and I'll admit you're kinda cute but I can't just look past everything you've done in the past."
"Yeji I swear I've been working on myself. Please give me this one chance."
Yeji sighed and looked at me. I put my hand over hers and gave it a light squeeze.
"Okay fine Y/N I'll give us a shot."
I kissed Yeji and pulled her into a hug.
"Do you want to take a picture to celebrate us Yeji?"
"Yeah sure let's do it."
I took my phone out and took a picture. After I took it I made sure I sent it to Ryujin. She is so going to kill me but I can't wait for it.
"Let's go back to our work Y/N."
Next Day
As I was heading to my eighth period class I got another text from Ryujin.
Ryujin: "Come to my room NOW"
Ryujin: "You little brat stop ignoring me!"
Ryujin: "Y/N I swear you better not have shoved your face in between Yeji's thighs yesterday!"
I kept ignoring her texts and continued on my way.
When I got into eighth period I sat down but not for long as suddenly the principals voice came over the speakers.
"Y/N make your way to room 304."
"Y/N I thought you said you would work on bettering yourself." Yeji said with a disappointed tone.
"Oh no it's not that Yeji I swear, let me prove it, follow me when I leave and Ryujin will tell you."
I walked out of the classroom and waited. I overheard Yeji ask to use the restroom and she came out of the classroom shortly after.
"Glad you decided to follow me."
I led Yeji to Ryujin's room and we both went inside together.
When we walked in Ryujin started speaking and she sounded pissed off "Y/N you little-"
Ryujin looked shocked when she saw Yeji by my side. She probably only expected me to come.
Ryujin quickly cleared her throat "What brings you here with your friend Y/N?"
"Actually she's my girlfriend."
I could see Ryujin was struggling to keep her smile up "Well that's nice to know."
"So why did you call Y/N here anyways?" Yeji asked.
"I just wanted to tell him I was so proud of him. He hasn't been written up and his grades are improving at a rapid rate."
"Thank you Ryujin that means a lot coming from you." I smiled at Ryujin when I said that and I could tell she wanted to have her way with me.
"Come on Yeji let's go back."
After School
As I was walking home I got another text from Ryujin
Ryujin: "Come over to my house. I'll rehabilitate you and knock that bratty behavior out of you."
I knew I had Ryujin where I wanted her so I made my way over to her house. When I arrived I went ahead and knocked on the door. No one opened and I was about to knock again but then I got another text from Ryujin.
Ryujin:"It's unlocked, come upstairs to my room."
I opened the door and made my way to Ryujin's room.
"Hello?"
"Come in!"
When I opened the door Ryujin quickly shoved me into a wall.
"Y/N you better have a damn good explanation for yourself!"
I started giggling and tried to kiss her but Ryujin smacked me.
"I don't want your filthy mouth touching my perfect face. Now tell me what the fuck you've been doing. Was I just a sex toy for you? Do you think you can do better than me?!"
"Ryujin I just wanted you to degrade me more that's all. You're perfect I would never replace you for Yeji."
Ryujin started laughing and looked at me with eyes that I was too familiar with.
"So you want to play that game huh Y/N? Well I'll show you what happens to brats like you."
Ryujin stripped naked and shoved me to the bed.
"I thought you said you were only my slut but it turns out you lied to me. And you should know that I hate liars Y/N."
"W-wait! Ryujin what are you doing!"
Ryujin grabbed a rope she had lying on the floor. She started to tie my hands to the bed frame preventing me from moving.
"Okay Ryujin I get it I won't be a brat anymore!"
"Well that's no fun is it Y/N?"
Ryujin pulled my pants down and my erected cock sprung out. Ryujin spat on it and started to pump it.
"Y/N look at your filthy cock. It's so sad you get turned on so easily. You're nothing but a sad degenerate."
Ryujin put the tip of my cock inside her mouth. She put her tongue all over it and I felt myself about to cum. My cock was twitching inside her mouth but she pulled out before I could cum.
"No. no, no Ryujin please let me cum!"
"Pathetic, My personal slut is nothing but a sex addict. What if I just leave you like this Y/N? Leave you needy all day long. My parents don't come back until tomorrow afternoon so I have plenty of time to toy with my favorite boy toy."
Ryujin sat on me just barely away from my cock. She straddled me and I couldn't help but get even harder from having her weight on me. She startled to lift my shirt and drew patterns on my chest.
"What to do with you Y/N I have so many options. What will take the brat out of you?"
I saw a sparkly in her eyes. This couldn't be good.
Ryujin got off me and went grabbed my pants. She pulled my phone out and took pictures of me.
"No don't it's embarrassing!" But my plea went unheard.
Ryujin started texting someone and looked at me with a smile that felt deadly.
"No! I know who you just texted please delete that message before she sees it!"
"Shh relax boy toy. I promise you'll enjoy what happens next."
Ryujin grabbed her breasts and put my cock in between them. She started to rub them on my cock.
I started moaning. Her breasts were so soft and squishy I wanted to cum all over them.
"Oh you like these? They're just a pair of breasts Y/N they're nothing special. Are you that much of a loser that seeing a simple pair of breasts is enough to get you worked up?"
"Ryujin!"
I couldn't help but whine. Ryujin wasn't letting me cum I felt my balls aching and wanting releases but she kept denying me.
"Please Ryujin!"
"I don't know Y/N does a whore like you deserve it? Maybe if you beg for it I'll consider it."
"Ryujin Ryujin please let me cum! I promise I won't be a brat anymore!"
Ryujin laughed at me and licked the top of my cock.
"My my Y/N I didn't think you would go as low as to beg for it. You're acting like a kid begging his mom to buy him fast food."
"Mommy please!"
My face immediately turned red when I said that. Fuck I accidentally said that out loud now she's going to make fun of me for sure.
"Mommy? Am I your mother now Y/N? Do you want me to hold you lovingly and kiss you goodnight now?"
Ryujin rubbed circles on my thighs and I could do nothing but watch as she rejects my orgasm.
Suddenly I heard the door downstairs open.
"We're up here!" Ryujin yelled.
The footsteps got closer. I was worried Ryujin's parents came home early but then the person entered the room.
"Yeji?! It's not what it looks like!"
"Y/N what the fuck is going on!"
"Yeji isn't this beautiful. Look at Y/N pathetically tied to the bed. Want to show him what happens to brats?"
I looked at Yeji and saw that her eyes had changed.
I knew I only had a few moments before Yeji made up her mind "Ryujin that isn't necessary-" but I was too late.
"Yeah Ryujin I want to teach Y/N a lesson."
"Kiss me."
Yeji got on top of me and started to make out with Ryujin. It was horrible seeing them make out while my cock was still hard.
"Look at Y/N I bet he wishes his pathertic cock was in between our lips." Ryujin looked at me with a smirk as she said that.
Yeji started to suck on Ryujin's breasts eliciting moans from Ryujin. Some of Yeji's saliva fell onto the bed. She didn't stop there though she shoved three fingers inside of Ryujin without warning.
"Yeji damn it your so much better than Y/N's cock ever was!"
"Fuck you Ryujin you literally came all over my cock last time!"
"Did you hear something Ryujin?"
"No must've been the wind."
I was turned on by the sight of both of them making out but I wanted to cum. I was in a state of pain of feeling erected but I didn't have anyway to relieve it.
"Ryujin do you think we should let Y/N cum?"
"Ugh fine we can let our little toy cum."
Ryujin and Yeji got their hands off each other and turned to me. Yeji took off her clothes and let my cock enter her warm pussy while Ryujin sat on my face.
"Go on boy toy make us cum!" Ryujin ordered.
I started to lick Ryujin's pussy and quickly shoved my cock in and out of Yeji's. They both started to make out during this and their saliva was starting to drip onto me.
"Y/N you bastard. How dare you cheat on me with Ryujin. We haven't even been together for a whole week. But you can make up for it if you make me cum hard."
"Yeji I only did it to rile Ryujin up."
"So I was nothing but a tool for you Y/N? I'm going to make you cum so much until you don't have any cum left asshole."
-
The torture had gone on for hours at this point. I couldn't stop my cock from getting hard but I was extremely exhausted. I came so much yet somehow Yeji and Ryujin weren't getting slower.
"Y/N get your filthy cock hard again. You aren't done until I say so!"
"Please Yeji stop I can't take it!"
"Should have thought of that before you used her." Ryujin responded.
I licked Ryujin's pussy so much my tongue started to hurt. Eventually she finally came all over my face again.
"I'm done here Yeji you can take Y/N from here." Ryujin laid down next to me pulling me close. I felt her warm sweaty body press up against me and it turned me on again.
"So your cock does still have some life in it."
"Yeji please no more."
"One more Y/N or should I beat the living shit out of you for cheating on me?"
I groaned and continued to thrust into Yeji. My body felt like it was on fire and I was sweating profusely.
"Ah! Yes Y/N show me how much you love me!"
"Yeji my cock is so sore!"
After a few more thrusts we both came at the same time. Yeji collapsed on me afterwards.
"Yeji I'm sorry I used you."
"It's fine Y/N but you better continue to fuck me like this."
"I don't think I have any cum left in me Yeji you drained everything."
Yeji kissed me softly and we both fell asleep.
-
The next morning we all woke up and out nostrils were filled with the smell of sex.
"It smells like 20 people had sex in here." Ryujin exclaimed, still groggy after she woke up.
"Come on Y/N help me clean up the place loser."
"Why me? Yeji also had sex with us!"
"Well you're the one who used her. So the least you can do is clean up her mess."
I had no choice. I got up and started to help Ryujin with the cleaning.
"You know Y/N I can't let this slide. No sex for 2 weeks."
"What!?
"You said you'd change your behavior and yet you went right back to using people for your own gain."
Ryujin gave me a smug look and I couldn't do anything but continue cleaning her room.
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If you're wondering why it took so long to make part 2 it's because I had to rewrite this story 3 times. I'm so tired
Y/N gets degraded even more cause it's the only thing he deserves. I am never writing Y/N as dom.
#itzy#ryujin#shin ryujin#itzy smut#kpop smut#smut#girl group smut#itzy x reader#ryujin smut#kpop gg#yeji#yeji smut#threes0me
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Day 12: Age Gap
Haerin x Male Reader
Kinkvember Day 12
She was sitting alone at a quaint coffee shop in Greenwich Village, her eyes scanning the crowd as she sipped her latte. She was new to the city and hadn't made many friends yet. As she looked up from her book, her gaze met mine. I was a 40-year-old man with a lean, muscular build, and I couldn't help but be drawn to her youthful charm.
"Excuse me," I said, leaning over her table. "I couldn't help but notice your book. Are you enjoying it?"
She looked up at me, a slight smile playing on her lips. "Yes, it's a classic. Have you read it?"
I nodded. "Many times. It's one of my favorites."
We spent the next hour talking about literature, art, and the city. Haerin was intelligent and witty, and I found myself increasingly drawn to her. As we left the coffee shop together, I suggested we continue our conversation over dinner. She agreed, and we walked to a nearby restaurant.
Over dinner, our conversation turned more personal. I learned about her dreams and aspirations, and she asked about my experiences in the city. The chemistry between us was palpable, and as the night wore on, I found myself wanting her more and more.
"You know," I said, leaning closer to her across the table, "I've really enjoyed our conversation tonight. But I have to admit, I'm finding it hard to concentrate on anything but you."
She blushed slightly, her eyes flickering with a mix of surprise and excitement. "Is that so?"
I nodded. "Yes. In fact, I think I'd like to see you again. And not just for dinner."
She raised an eyebrow, a playful smile on her lips. "Oh, really? And what did you have in mind?"
I leaned in, my voice low and husky. "I think you know what I'm talking about, Haerin."
She held my gaze for a moment before her eyes flicked down to my lips. "I think I do," she whispered.
The following week, Haerin came over to my apartment. As soon as she walked in, I could see the desire in her eyes. I poured us some wine, and we sat on the couch, our bodies close but not yet touching.
"You're beautiful, Haerin," I said, my hand reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "I've been thinking about you all day long."
She leaned into my touch, her eyes never leaving mine. "I've been thinking about you too," she admitted.
I leaned in and captured her lips in a soft, gentle kiss. She responded eagerly, her lips parting to allow my tongue to explore her mouth. Our kiss deepened, becoming more passionate and intense.
I broke away from her lips and trailed kisses down her neck, feeling her pulse quicken under my touch. She moaned softly, her head falling back to give me better access. I nipped at her earlobe, making her gasp.
"You taste so good," I murmured, my hand sliding up her thigh. "I want to taste more of you."
She shivered at my words, her breath coming in short gasps. I unbuttoned her blouse slowly, revealing her smooth, creamy skin. I leaned down and captured one of her nipples in my mouth, swirling my tongue around it before sucking gently.
"Oh, God," she moaned, her hands tangling in my hair. "That feels so good."
I switched to her other nipple, giving it the same attention. Haerin's body was on fire, her hips moving restlessly against mine. I could feel her heat through her jeans, and I knew she was ready for more.
I unbuttoned her jeans and slipped a hand inside, finding her wet and ready. I stroked her slowly, my fingers exploring her folds. She gasped and bucked against my hand, her breath coming in short, sharp gasps.
"You're so wet," I murmured, my voice thick with desire. "I can't wait to taste you."
I slid my fingers out of her and brought them to my lips, sucking them clean. Her eyes widened at the sight, and I could see the desire in them. I pushed her back onto the couch and slid down her body, my hands gripping her hips.
I hooked my fingers into her jeans and panties and pulled them down, revealing her glistening pussy. I leaned in and ran my tongue along her slit, tasting her sweetness. She moaned and arched her hips, giving me better access.
I licked and sucked at her clit, my tongue swirling around it before flicking it lightly. Haerin's moans grew louder, her hands gripping the couch cushions. I slipped two fingers inside her, curling them up to hit her G-spot.
"Oh, God, yes," she cried out, her hips moving in time with my fingers. "Right there, don't stop."
I kept up the pressure, my fingers moving in and out of her while my tongue worked her clit. Her breath came in short gasps, her body tensing as she neared the edge.
"I'm close," she panted. "So close."
I increased the pressure, my fingers moving faster and harder. Haerin cried out, her body convulsing as she came. I lapped up her juices, savoring her taste.
I stood up and undressed quickly, my cock rock hard and ready. Haerin watched me, her eyes filled with desire. I climbed on top of her, my cock poised at her entrance.
"Are you ready for me?" I asked, my voice gruff with desire.
She nodded, her eyes locking onto mine. "Yes," she whispered. "I'm ready."
I pushed into her slowly, giving her time to adjust to my size. She was tight and wet, her pussy gripping my cock like a velvet glove. I groaned at the sensation, my hips moving slowly at first before picking up speed.
"You feel so good," I grunted, my hips moving faster. "So tight and wet."
Haerin wrapped her legs around my waist, her hips moving in time with mine. "Faster," she begged. "Harder."
I obliged, my hips slamming into hers as I fucked her hard and fast. The sound of our bodies slapping together filled the room, our moans and cries echoing off the walls.
"Oh, God, yes," Haerin cried out. "Right there, don't stop."
I could feel my orgasm building, my cock throbbing inside her. I reached between us and rubbed her clit, my fingers moving in time with my hips. Haerin's eyes rolled back, her body tensing as she came again.
"I'm going to come," I groaned, my body tensing as I pushed into her one last time. "I'm going to fill you with my cum."
I came with a roar, my body shaking as I filled her with my seed. I collapsed on top of her, our bodies slick with sweat. I rolled off of her and pulled her into my arms, our bodies still joined.
"That was incredible," she whispered, her fingers tracing patterns on my chest.
I smiled, my eyes closed. "It was," I agreed. "And I'm not done with you yet."
We spent the rest of the night exploring each other's bodies, our passion and desire never waning. As the sun rose, we lay entwined in each other's arms, our bodies sated and satisfied.
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"Wei Ying would have never been able to escape being a scapegoat"
YES. FUCKING YES. SOMEONE OTHER THAN ME SAID IT!
It never mattered what Wei Ying did. He was always going to be a scapegoat purely because of the cultivation he used and his status as a servant.
Wei ying isn't flawless. He makes many mistakes but none of them had anything to do with how he was treated towards the end. Mxtx actually tests you for this too. If you actually think Wei Ying caused his own ostracization then you've fallen into the same propaganda as everyone else in the story. If you agree with madame yu or even Jiang Cheng that he had a part to play in the near genocide of the Jiangs then you have also fallen for the same propaganda.
The number of people who genuinely agree with Madame Yu and JC on that last point is astounding. Imagine thinking a teenager being insolent is a fair reason to fault them for the death of an entire clan and not instead blame the people using it as an excuse to kill that very same clan. It's like mxtx tests her readers over and over. Just to see if her readers can zoom out to see the bigger picture.
The clans were never going to accept the wens. The fact that Wei ying-a servant- owned something that made him so powerful was also another reason why they were never going to leave him alone. People keep talking about culture and using it to justify the actions of their favs and completely ignoring the one that's staring them in the face and repeatedly and directly brought up in the story
None of our hands are clean
[First] Prev <–-> Next
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Gwayne Hightower - Rivalries
Summary - She is the object of affection for Gwayne, her devoted husband and her resentful brother, Daemon. As passion ignites and jealousy simmers, secrets and desires threaten to unravel, culminating in a game where love and power collide in the shadows of the palace.
Pairing - Gwayne Hightower x Targaryen reader
Warnings - Sexual content (oral f!receiving)
Word count - 2516
Masterlist for Gwayne • House of the Dragon General Masterlist
Men have always possessed an uncanny knack for wielding power, bending influence to their will in ways both obvious and subtle.
Few embody this more fully than Otto Hightower, a man whose calculating mind and scheming nature have ensnared him a firm grip on our realm.
Through a web of calculated marriages, he has planted his kin at the heart of the Targaryen dynasty.
First, he manoeuvred his only daughter into marriage with the king, my brother Viserys, making her queen and securing his own proximity to the throne. But that wasn't enough for Otto.
He orchestrated a second union, binding me, the realm's princess and sister to the king, to his eldest son, Gwayne.
In doing so, Otto has gained control over both the king and me, each one of us a pawn in his designs.
Now, with his daughter wielding influence over the king and his son ensnared in my favour, Otto's reach is all-encompassing.
Through the queen's soft-spoken whispers, he bends Viserys to his will, while through his son's bond with me, he consolidates his sway over the princess of the realm—a princess who, in turn, holds her brother's ear and favours the Hightower cause.
Fortunately for Otto, his son Gwayne is entirely enchanted by me, his devotion unwavering.
But not all in House Targaryen are as easily convinced of these alliances' virtues.
Our brother Daemon alone harbours deep resentment, his contempt for Otto's manipulations a fire that no amount of diplomacy can cool.
─── ✦⋅♡⋅✦ ───
"Stop watching me," I murmured with a teasing smile, adjusting my earrings.
Gwayne leaned casually against the doorway, his gaze openly admiring, though a flicker of something sharper lingered in his eyes.
"How can I not?" he replied, his voice low, as if savouring every detail of the moment.
His laugh was soft, rich with affection, but I knew him too well not to see that spark of possessiveness beneath it.
It was a look that said he was proud, even smug, that I was his—but also quietly wary, as though he were forever warding off the shadow of some unseen rival.
I smirked, glancing at him through the mirror as I adjusted a wayward strand of hair.
"Go down to the feast, Gwayne," I urged, straightening up, my reflection catching his eyes in the glass. "I'll be along soon enough."
He let out a playful sigh, his shoulders drooping in exaggerated disappointment.
"I had hoped to walk in with the most beautiful lady in all the realm on my arm," he said, the feigned pout quirking his lips, inviting my laughter.
"Patience, love. You'll have your moment," I replied, the corners of my mouth lifting as he leaned in, cupping my face with familiar warmth. He kissed me, his lips lingering as if reluctant to let go.
Even as he pulled back, his eyes promised he'd claim me again before the night was over.
With a last, wistful look, he turned to leave, his presence an absence that weighed on the air. And then he was gone.
Down in the great hall, the feast was already a whirlwind of flickering torches, laughter, and the clamour of goblets raised in toasts.
Gwayne moved through the crowd with ease, his gaze courteous, his nods respectful. But then, as though fate delighted in twisting the knife, he found himself face-to-face with Daemon.
Daemon, who leaned against a pillar with that insufferable smirk of his, every inch the dangerous prince.
His eyes held an unsettling gleam, something unreadable lurking behind their dark depths as he regarded Gwayne with a look that felt almost too intimate.
"My sister finally had the sense to let you walk alone?" Daemon's voice was as smooth as silk, but each word was sharpened to wound, his arms crossing as he took in Gwayne with a mocking tilt of his head.
Gwayne's smile was a flash of polished steel, his voice unflinching.
"Wouldn't that be your wish, my prince?" he returned, his tone honeyed with feigned respect. "Then you might finally have her all to yourself."
Daemon's smirk wavered, his jaw tightening as the ever-so-carefully constructed façade cracked, allowing the faintest flicker of irritation to bleed through.
Daemon might have titles and power, but there was one thing, one person, he would never possess—and that knowledge ate away at him, poisoned the edge of his smile.
"Oh, don't worry," Daemon said, lifting his goblet to his lips, his gaze cold and unwavering. "One day, she'll tire of you. And when that day comes, she'll come crawling to me."
Gwayne let out a low, quiet laugh, a sound rich with derision. He leaned in, closing the gap between them, his words barely more than a murmur.
"Don't hold your breath," he said smoothly. "I wouldn't want you waiting forever."
Their words were razor-sharp whispers, thinly veiled threats exchanged like a deadly dance, both men balancing on the precipice of violence.
But as if the gods themselves had a sense of irony, the hall doors swung open just then.
In unison, both men turned, their eyes falling upon me as I entered.
Gwayne's breath audibly caught, his pride swelling as he caught sight of Daemon's face—his gaze darkening as he took in the emerald green gown I'd chosen, a proud declaration of my allegiance, of my bond with Gwayne.
The colour was a statement, a reminder, a choice that all in the hall would recognize.
I lifted a gloved hand, waving lightly to Daemon, whose returning smile was as thin and strained as a worn-out thread.
But then I shot a wink to Gwayne, my mouth curving into a private smile that only he understood. A victorious smile spread across his lips, his chest swelling slightly.
"Now, doesn't she look divine?" he murmured to Daemon, his voice rich with the satisfaction of a man who knows he's won, his eyes alight with triumph as he cast a quick, cutting glance at his rival.
Daemon's smile wavered, barely masking the smouldering bitterness that darkened his gaze. His voice was a dangerous purr, admiration and resentment blending like poison in his tone.
"Irresistible," he replied, his eyes lingering on the fabric that marked my choice, his gaze smouldering with an unspoken challenge.
Gwayne leaned closer, his voice thick with intent, his words low enough for Daemon to hear. "I look forward to removing that gown later tonight."
Daemon's jaw clenched, his fists tightening at his sides. The tension between them sharpened, each man a wire strung too tight, vibrating with a resentment just waiting to snap.
"Perhaps," Gwayne taunted, his smile razor-thin, "the rogue prince might content himself with watching from a respectful distance, praying to the gods for a fortune like mine."
Daemon's knuckles whitened around his goblet, his calm veneer slipping, barely.
He looked like he might have lunged forward had I not arrived between them, drawing both of their heated gazes to myself.
"Are you two playing nice?" I asked lightly, laughter lacing my voice, breaking the taut string of animosity between them.
Gwayne wasted no time, slipping an arm possessively around my waist and pulling me close. He took my face in his hands, kissing me with a passion that left me breathless, his intent to stake his claim clear as day.
I pulled back, cheeks flushed, my breath catching as I smiled up at him.
Daemon cleared his throat sharply, his gaze hardening, but his practised smile never wavered. "Of course we are, sister," he said, his voice as smooth as ever.
But in his eyes a storm was brewing.
I laughed, stepping forward to kiss him on the cheek in sisterly affection. But Daemon's face tilted, ever so slightly, guiding my kiss dangerously close to the corner of his mouth.
I pulled back with a startled laugh, brushing it off as an innocent miscalculation, but I didn't miss the way Gwayne's hand tightened possessively around my waist.
"We should greet the other guests," Gwayne said, his voice a low murmur laced with steel as he pulled me firmly to his side, making his claim crystal clear.
With one last smile at Daemon, I let Gwayne lead me through the crowd, our departure marked by a final, simmering look over his shoulder.
Daemon's eyes tracked us, his expression carefully schooled, yet the slight, almost triumphant smirk that tugged at his lips betrayed his satisfaction.
It was a look that promised he would not let the matter rest, a hint of smugness at the intimacy we'd shared, however fleeting.
In his mind, he'd scored a small victory in this endless, unspoken war—and he would savour it until his next move.
The night wore on, music and laughter swelling around us, but Gwayne's attention never strayed.
His hand on my waist was a constant, possessive presence, his fingers tracing circles that sent heat flooding to my cheeks.
There was a hunger in his gaze that he made no attempt to hide, a smouldering desire barely held in check.
"You're very eager tonight," I whispered, my lips brushing his ear.
A thrill ran through me as he shivered under my breath, his hand tightening at my side, thumb brushing the curve of my breast in a bold, teasing stroke.
His answering smile was both reverent and defiant.
"No one but you is to blame for that," he murmured, his voice low, a promise woven in each syllable. He glanced around the hall, and for a moment, his gaze caught Daemon's.
The look between them was a spark, igniting something dangerous.
Daemon's smirk faltered as he held Gwayne's gaze, a silent tension crackling between them before he turned away with a barely concealed scoff.
I sensed the dark resolve kindling in Gwayne, a thrill of excitement creeping into his touch.
"Come with me," he whispered, the command and excitement unmistakable. His hand tightened around mine, and with a quick tug, he led me through the hall.
I could barely keep up, my surprised laughter echoing softly as we slipped past the others, evading curious glances.
"Gwayne, what are you—" I managed, breathless as he pulled me into the shadows of a secluded balcony.
The night air was cool, adding a thrill of secrecy as he backed me against the stone, his gaze sharp with intent.
"I can't restrain myself any longer," he murmured, his eyes blazing with hunger as he dropped to his knees before me.
My heart pounded as his hands gathered the fabric of my gown, his movements reverent yet bold, his hands urgent.
"Gwayne—someone might—"
My words faltered into a gasp as he parted my legs, his mouth hovering tantalizingly close. The thrill of it all, the forbidden nature, sent a rush of heat through me as I glanced over my shoulder at the empty corridor.
"Trust me," he whispered, his voice a low, gravelly plea, edged with defiance.
His eyes flared with something fierce and unapologetic, daring me to pull away, to deny him what he was ready to give.
Before I could fully gather my thoughts, he pressed his mouth to me, his touch igniting a fire that swept through my entire being.
My head fell back, my eyes fluttering shut as I stifled a moan, my hand flying to cover my mouth.
I lost myself to the blissful rhythm of his touch, his mouth working with an expertise that left me breathless, every stroke intentional and unrelenting.
Each soft sound he coaxed from me only drove him further, his hands gripping my hips possessively, grounding me against the hard stone.
"That's it, love," he murmured between kisses, his gaze lifting to mine even as he pressed deeper, his eyes filled with a dark devotion.
I was lost to him, each wave of pleasure pulling me further under, blissfully unaware of the game he had set into motion.
Unseen by me, Gwayne's gaze flicked to the dimly lit corridor, his senses on high alert, waiting.
He was all too aware that Daemon would pass through this corridor, lured by both routine and curiosity.
And here, tucked against the shadowed stone of the balcony with me, Gwayne intended to make the prince pay for every hidden glance and lingering touch that Daemon had stolen.
It wasn't long before Daemon appeared, his strides purposeful yet wary, as though drawn by some invisible pull.
He stopped abruptly in the shadows just beyond the balcony, his eyes widening, expression caught somewhere between shock and fascination as he took in the scene before him.
Gwayne lifted his head for the briefest moment, his eyes meeting Daemon's across the dim corridor.
His mouth, slick with evidence of his devotion, curved into a wicked, triumphant smile—a silent victory. He had claimed this moment, his eyes taunting Daemon with a satisfaction that words could not convey.
He knew Daemon's love for me, knew the jealousy that burned beneath every calm exterior, every fleeting glance.
Daemon's jaw tightened, his fists clenched at his sides, and yet he did not turn away. He was rooted to the spot, compelled by a combination of fury and helpless longing.
Gwayne held his gaze, the smirk deepening as he pressed his mouth back against me, his movements more fervent, almost performative, meant to drive the rogue prince mad with envy.
I remained blissfully unaware, caught in the waves of pleasure, my mind fogged with sensation.
The world beyond Gwayne's touch faded into oblivion, my body responding to his every movement as he held me tightly, anchoring me against the balcony.
I gasped, feeling my restraint begin to shatter under his care, my body trembling against his hands, and I clutched onto his shoulders to steady myself.
Gwayne's eyes darted up once more, relishing the sight of Daemon—livid, yearning, utterly defeated in that moment.
The prince's face was a mask of restrained anger and desire, his fingers flexing as if to break something, or perhaps to reach for me, to grasp what lay mere inches beyond his reach.
Gwayne's smirk deepened, triumphant, revelling in the one prize Daemon could neither claim nor deny himself from wanting.
With one last smouldering glance at the prince, Gwayne returned his full attention to me, his mouth and hands working in tandem, ensuring I was lost entirely to him.
He whispered praises into my skin, quiet enough that only I could hear, a stark contrast to the dark thrill he shared with his rival just beyond my view.
Daemon stood, his chest rising and falling, but Gwayne gave him nothing more—no acknowledgement, no satisfaction.
He closed his eyes, committing every reaction, every soft gasp of mine to memory, a final mark of his victory before Daemon could bear it no longer.
With a rigid turn, Daemon left, his face a storm of rage and resignation as he vanished into the darkened corridor.
When I opened my eyes, breathless and flushed, I found Gwayne's gaze on me, filled with pride, as though I were the centre of his world.
"What?" I asked with a dazed smile, noticing the glint of triumph in his eyes.
"Nothing, love," he murmured, his thumb stroking my cheek tenderly as he helped me steady myself. "Just admiring how perfect you are."
His smirk softened as he leaned up to capture my lips, the victory between him and Daemon remaining a secret I would never know.
A/n - this didn't execute how I wanted exactly but I'm too lazy to change it now
Gwayne tag list - @deniixlovezelda @randomnerdyfan
#house of the dragon#house targaryen#hotd#hotd x reader#house of the dragon x reader#hotd one shot#hotd season 2#house of the dragon fanfiction#hotd fanfic#hotd s2#team green#gwayne hightower#gwayne x reader#gwayne hightower x reader#ser gwayne#ser gwayne hightower#gwayne x you#gwayne fanfic
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Captured
LOONA/LOOSSEMBLE Yeojin x Male Characters
1349 words
Genre: (TW) Non-con, Size kink, Manhandling, Carryfuck, Belly bulge, Forced creampie
Yeojin's heart raced as the shadowy figures closed in, their towering forms casting long, menacing shadows on the cold, damp concrete. Despite her size, she had always been fiercely independent, but now, surrounded by these brutes, she felt more vulnerable than ever. The stench of their sweat and the metallic scent of fear filled the air as their grinning faces leered down at her. She knew what they wanted, what they were here to do, and she knew she had to fight with every ounce of strength she had to prevent them from carrying out their sickening plan.
Her eyes searched desperately for an escape, but the alley walls seemed to close in around her, trapping her like a cornered animal. With a trembling voice, she demanded they leave her alone, her words echoing in the silence of the night. But the men only chuckled, their grip tightening around her slender arms, as they began to drag her deeper into the darkness.
Yeojin's clothing was ripped away, leaving her bare and trembling in the harsh glow of a solitary streetlight that had managed to pierce through the gloom. Her pleas for mercy fell on deaf ears as the men's rough hands began to explore her small, delicate frame, their eyes glinting with malicious intent. The cold air of the alley bit at her exposed skin, raising goosebumps that had nothing to do with the chill. They squeezed and groped her breasts, the cruelty in their touch sending waves of revulsion through her body. Each time she begged them to stop, her words were met with a sharp slap on her ass, the sound echoing through the deserted space. The pain was a stark reminder of her vulnerability, fueling the fire of her determination to somehow find a way out of this nightmare.
Her eyes searched for anything that could be used as a weapon, a glimmer of hope, but the alley remained a grim tableau of shadow and despair. The men's laughter grew louder, their anticipation palpable, as they continued their humiliating assault on her dignity. Yeojin knew she had to act fast if she was to survive this horrific ordeal.
One of the men, a hulking brute with a sneer that sent shivers down Yeojin's spine, stepped forward and casually dropped his pants, revealing his engorged member. He grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at it as he stroked himself with a hand that looked as if it could crush her entire head. He bent down, his hot breath reeking of stale alcohol, and whispered, "Look what you're missing out on, little one." His calloused fingers then invaded the soft folds of her sex, rubbing her clit with a roughness that sent a shock of pain through her body.
She screamed a furious "No!" that pierced the night, her voice hoarse from fear and outrage. Despite her protests, the man's grin widened, his eyes gleaming with perverse pleasure at her distress. "You're going to love this," he leered, his voice a sickening blend of mockery and excitement. Yeojin's mind raced as she desperately tried to think of a way to escape, her body trembling with a mix of fear and revulsion as the men's grip tightened around her. She pleaded once more, "Please, just leave me alone!" but her words were lost in the cacophony of their lewd comments and cruel laughter. The reality of her situation was setting in, and she knew she had to fight back with everything she had if she didn't want to become a mere plaything for their depraved desires.
The man behind Yeojin lined himself up with her trembling pussy, his towering frame casting a dark shadow over her exposed form. Despite her efforts to resist, the men held her in place, forcing her to stand on her tippy toes to meet the brute's monstrous height. She could feel the hot, throbbing head of his cock nudging against her entrance, a stark and terrifying reminder of the brutal violation that awaited her. The cold, unyielding concrete beneath her bare feet offered no comfort, only a harsh contrast to the warm, sticky mess of fear that coated her skin. She squeezed her eyes shut, tears streaming down her cheeks, and braced herself for the pain that she knew was about to come. The man's grin grew wider as he took in the sight of her quivering body, his excitement palpable in the air as he positioned himself to take her roughly. Yeojin's chest heaved with shallow, panicked breaths, her mind racing for a way out of the impending horror.
With a violent grunt, the man lifted Yeojin off the ground, his arms wrapping around her waist and pulling her onto his massive, pulsating cock. Her legs dangled uselessly in the air, unable to find purchase as she was held in his iron grip. She screamed as he thrust into her, the sheer size of him ripping through her tight, unprepared pussy with a brutal force that sent shockwaves of agony through her entire being. "It hurts! It's too big!" she wailed, her voice piercing the air with desperation. The men laughed in unison, their sadistic delight only growing as her cries grew more frantic. Her eyes bulged as she stared at the monstrous cock invading her, her tiny frame no match for the thick, unyielding shaft that claimed her with each savage pump. The pain was unlike anything she had ever felt, a searing, relentless fire that consumed her as the brute pounded into her mercilessly. The others watched with eager eyes, stroking their own swollen members as they awaited their turn with the defenseless girl, their lustful grins a testament to their depravity. Yeojin's world had been reduced to a whirlwind of pain, fear, and the crushing weight of the brute's body as he used her to satisfy his animalistic desires.
Yeojin's body, despite the agony, began to react involuntarily to the relentless assault, her pussy spasming and clenching around the monstrous cock that invaded her. The brute's deep, guttural grunts filled the alley as he hammered into her, his thrusts growing more erratic as he neared climax. Each time he slammed into her, his hips slapped against her ass, leaving reddened prints on her pale skin. The men around her jeered and whispered degrading comments, their eyes alight with sadistic glee as they watched her suffering. "Look at the little slut, taking it all," one of them taunted, while another chuckled, "You're going to take all our cum, aren't you?" Despite her pleas for them to stop, her body betrayed her, her orgasms coming in waves, one after another, each one more intense than the last. The outline of the brute's cock was clearly visible on her distended belly, a sickening testament to the brutal stretching she was enduring.
"Ah, I'm gonna cum, little one," the brute grunted, his eyes rolling back in his head as he felt his climax approaching. Yeojin's pleas grew more frantic, "Please, no, don't cum inside me!" she begged, her voice trembling with fear and pain. Her legs were wrapped tightly around his waist, trying to hold onto any semblance of control she had left, but her words had no effect on the animalistic creature ravaging her. His grip grew even tighter, his thrusts more erratic as he neared the peak of his lust. Yeojin could feel the pressure building inside of her, the stretching and burning becoming unbearable as she knew she was about to be filled with his vile seed.
With a final, violent thrust, the man's entire body tensed, and Yeojin felt the hot, thick fluid fill her up, his cock pulsing with each shot deep within her. She screamed in despair, her body trembling uncontrollably as wave after wave of his cum flooded her insides, the sensation of being so utterly filled and claimed washing over her in a nauseating tide of violation. The men around them cheered and clapped, their lustful eyes never leaving the scene before them as they eagerly awaited their turns to use and degrade her even further.
Happy (belated) Yeojin day! A short one for the short one.
---
Will be going on a hiatus for the rest of the month and will go back to writing afterwards.
Ideas are welcomed. :)
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THIS but fucking. MBTI. When I was still in the Air Force my... hell, I don't remember his position name. I'm so happy to realize I've brain dumped so much military minutiae after only three years out. Anyway. My supervisor's supervisor. This Master Sergeant (MSgt) was OBSESSED with MBTI. It was literally the first conversation I had with him when he took the position and was doing the rounds to meet all of us. We were working for a 3-letter agency AND working outside our unit in an almost wholly civilian org on top of that, so thankfully we didn't work in the same office, but good christ he took potshots at ANYBODY he ASSUMED was one flavor of alphabet soup or another that he didn't "agree with."
He did, for whatever it's worth, correctly guess my flavor of alphabet soup (I have never ever been able to remember or care what my MBTI is, it's fucking alphabet soup, leave me alone) after a 5-minute conversation. He also, however, failed to notice my far more aggressive and obvious extremely mentally and physically unwell signs thanks to my miserable recent divorce and far more miserable unfolding chronic illnesses that were going to end up with me getting a whole-ass 100% disability rank/pay with Veteran's Affairs and insisted on visiting my shit-ass cubicle EVERY. FUCKING. DAY. to CHAT. USUALLY DISCUSSING FUCKING THE MBTI OF VARIOUS OTHER DUDES IN OUR CHAIN OF COMMAND (COC). THAT I BARELY KNEW THE NAMES OF. NEVER MIND WHAT THEY LOOKED LIKE OR WHO THEY WERE AS LIKE. ACTUAL DUDES. BECAUSE. I MUST STRESS AGAIN. WE WORKED IN A MOSTLY CIVILIAN ORG. SO 90% OF THE MIL FOLK IN OUR COC DIDN'T WORK ANYWHERE NEAR ME. TO THE POINT WHERE I LITERALLY DIDN'T HAVE THE DOOR CODES TO ACCESS WHERE THEY WORKED. AND THE OTHER 10% DID LIKE. ACTUAL INTEL SHIT IN OTHER OFFICES I HAD RARELY ANY REASON TO EVER ENTER. AND THE ONES I DID HAVE REASON TO ENTER WITH MILITARY FOLK IN THEM WERE USUALLY FUCKING INSUFFERABLE. AND I AVOIDED THEM AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. SO. I DID NOT. FUCKING KNOW. WHO HE WAS. EVER!!! TALKING!!! ABOUT!!!!!
Hngh. This is why I try not to think of those awful fucking 5 years of my life. I get caps-lock-y about it. Sorry.
Anyway, this motherfucker like. Trauma bonded? To me? Because of his also miserable recent divorce? And he wanted to fuck me SO HARD while also endlessly ranting to me about MBTI horseshit 60% of every conversation we had (the other 40% and his otherwise normal behavior did actually meet me compatibly on the Normal Human Scale and we got on well, and also he was my supervisor's supervisor so like, I had to be somewhat respectful of his stupid MSgt rank). It was an exhausting fucking. What. 8 months? A full year? MBTI this. MBTI that. Etc. Etc. Etc. ETC.!!!!!!
Anyway the SECOND I said "asexual" he entirely quit talking to me entirely, so I guess that's something.
Secondary anyway birthstone-obsessed people are wild to me. Us March folks got royally fucked over by boring-ass AQUAMARINE and you expect me to take that stuff seriously? Lol
Thirdly anyway I haven't dealt with any hardcore astrology people since high school, but she was my friend's mom and she and her husband were honestly the best role models in my life at that age? To the point my shit-fucking-terrible mom resented her otherwise a-okay positivity in my life for like? A decade?? Hell, she probably still does. It's wild how many times I had to remind my Chronic Gaslighting Bitch of a mom, "I haven't talked to Betty since I was 18, WHAT are you talking about."
Fourthly anyway shout-out to Civilian Megan (whose spelling variation I can never remember on account of having one of those Normal White American Girl names with 50 spelling variations, even with her full name on a paper name plate) who sat across from me and went out of her way to save me from Awkward Lengthy conversations with MSgt MBTI and SSgt Marvel Movies Nerd every goddamn day, she was a real one and I should probably shoot her a 'hi how are you' message on Steam today
“Bat swinging at wasp nest” post but I cannot be nice about astrology people. No you did not find the one good or cute or quirky way to believe the quality of someone’s character is biologically pre-determined. Just because you found a way to not base it on race or ethnicity or gender does not make judging someone’s character on an innate and uncontrolled attribute suddenly teehee fine.
I’m even more baffled by the people going “it’s just fun!” “It’s just a hobby!!” Sure if it was something harmless. It’s not. We are quite literally talking about how you intend to judge, treat, view, respect, and interact with someone entirely differently based on an inherent trait. How are you not aghast? How are you not embarrassed? Why are you so insistent on needing to operate on a hierarchy of pre-determined character judgement?
#there's nothing quite like sitting down on a parking curb while you say 'thanks for the interest it's flattering but P-in-V sex upsets me'#and seeing a dude you genuinely wanted to be friends with Turn All Interest Off immediately#hi i worked for the goddamn NSA for 5 years and all i got out of it was trauma boredom several mental/physical illnesses and MANY NDAs#ask me for details in 2050-something#that's not a joke i literally signed many pages forbidding me from Actual Detail Discussions on the goddamn NSA until 2050-something#ace blogging
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A New Face Pt.2
pairing: Tara Carpenter x Reader
summary: Tara was devastated you didn't text her. That was until you met her at a party.
word count: 2250
Pt.1
a/n: hey guys, first of all thank you all so much for the overwhelming support 🥹 I didn't expect this much attention at all especially for my first ever pic I've written. Anyways, I'm always open to feedback and requests if you have any. Take note I'm still getting used to this whole Tumblr thing so it may take a while for me to put up master lists and all that stuff (p.s sorry if there's any mistakes, a part of me feels like this lowkey sucks lolz)
It’s been 2 weeks since Tara had last seen you. And during those weeks, Tara’s mind had been fogged by you. Her mind kept repeating your interaction and every time a smile grew on her face. The group of friends had been making fun of her ever since they entered the lift after leaving yours and Chad’s apartment, saying she looked like a kid getting a lollipop for breakfast, all giggly and in a daze, but she didn’t care.
She wanted to see you again badly. She started plotting and thinking about ways your paths can collide again. Like, she could plan walking in school and “coincidentally” cross paths even though her classroom was nowhere near yours and at least 10 minutes away from your building. But she wouldn’t do that! “I’m not that crazy” Tara thought. But would she? (A teeny tiny part of Tara knows she’s capable of doing so.)
She didn’t have the guts to text you and it’s already been two weeks! A part of her was hoping that you’d text her, but a pang of disappointment hit her when you didn’t. She usually isn’t this hung up on a person like this. Sure, she found some individuals cute from time to time, but she wouldn’t go up to this extend. She wouldn’t chase for someone, but for you, maybe, just a little bit, she would start jogging a little. There was something so.. alluring and appealing about you that Tara couldn’t comprehend. It’s like her mind glitched and was programmed to think about you 24/7.
Tara was currently lying on her bed occupied by her mind (thinking of you obviously) when there was aggressive knocks on the front door. “Give me a minute! Jesus..” murmured Tara as she walked towards the threshold. She opened the door which revealed Mindy looking impatient.
“Dude, are you not dressed yet? We planned to go this party at least a week ago!”
“Oh shit, I forgot about this Mindy I’m sorry! Give me 15 minutes to get ready” Tara replied apologetically while Mindy rolled her eyes and plopped herself down on the couch, kicking up her feet onto the coffee table and reached for the tv remote. After an excruciatingly long 15 minutes (it was actually 45 minutes), Tara and Mindy were set to leave and make their way to the party that was a few blocks away.
The house reeked of alcohol, weed, and cigarettes. The party-goers were dressed casually, with some wearing revealing and tight clothes to attract attention, no doubt trying to get laid. There was r&b and occasionally hip hop music blaring through the speakers. Mindy met up with Anika, dragging her to get a drink to get the night started which made Tara lose track of them, leaving her all alone. Tara’s stomach churned when she kept seeing couples making out in the hallway as she strolled to the kitchen to get a drink. (She kept this like a dirty secret, but she had imagined as if it was you and her making out)
“Hey Tara!” She turned around and saw Chad, with a random girl with his arm around her waist.
“Chad? I didn’t know you were coming to this party” Tara explained, ignoring the dirty looks and stink eye given from the girl
“Yeah, I didn’t want to actually, but Y/N asked me out to this party and….” Whatever gibberish Chad spewed out was ignored as you occupied Tara’s mind. You were here? Y/N? Chad’s sexy and hot and super cute roommate? She’s doomed.
“Why didn’t you tell me they were coming?! Oh god! Oh my god, Do I look good? Do I have anything between my teeth, I knew I should have put on a sexier outfit”
“Tara- Tara calm down. You look good, okay? Don’t worry about it. If it makes you feel any better, they called you cute after you guys left the other day.” Chad commented, putting a stop onto Tara’s word vomit. You called her cute? Tara felt butterflies in her stomach. But why didn’t you text her? All Tara could hope for is that the universe is on her side tonight and let her catch a glimpse of you, and preferably not drunk to make a fool of herself and to earn atleast a decent conversation.
She chugged down the alcoholic drink she made and decided to make one in an instant, trying to get rid of her blush since just thinking of you made her stomach do somersaults. She sat down on the couch, hoping she could see you soon. After almost half an hour, her patience was wearing thin, she hadn’t seen you yet. How even big is this house? Why couldn’t she see you? It was as if this house was alive and kept shifting its walls purposely to block her view of you. She made her way to the kitchen to make a stronger drink. Mindy was probably making out with Anika in a random room anyways so she doesn’t really bother, which left Tara looking like a real loser all alone weeping in the kitchen.
She chugged down another shot of her drink, before making a new one. As she lifted her head to swallow her drink in one go, she felt a presence behind her. She smelt a scent of a wood, earthy with a reminiscent of smoke notes, along with a subtle smell of sweat.
“Hey stranger. What’re you doing here all alone?” Tara choked on her drink when she heard your voice. Damn it, even your voice is hot. How does that even work? Tara had a coughing fit, while trying to cover up her blush and not make a fool out of herself (she already did). You made it even worse by wincing slightly and putting your hand on her lower back, rubbing it up and down her back and trying to at least comfort her while she was having a crisis.
“You alright there? Let me get some water for you,” You softly chuckled before proceeding to the refrigerator and grab a bottle of water, opening the cap and passing it to Tara which gobbled it down. It took her a few moments to settle down and for her blush to subside.
“Thank you, really. I appreciate it.”
“No problem, I can’t debate with you about horror movies if you’re dead, right?”
“Ha ha. Very funny. Anyway, I didn’t know you were coming to this party. I assumed you were too cool and busy for this type of stuff.” Tara teased. She took this time to take in the sight of you, you were wearing baggy jeans with a fitting t-shirt, revealing your tattoos. There goes the butterflies in her tummy again.
“I didn’t call in a shift today and I had nothing to do. Plus, it was an impromptu thing to come here since, well, I had a feeling you were going to be here and..I wanted to see you.” You softly chuckled, with your voice lowering at the end. Now it was your turn to start blushing, and Tara found it adorable.
“Well, I’m right here in front of you, cutie. What did you want to talk about?” Tara boldly added in the nickname, in hopes of seeing you blush again. You smiled at the term which revealed those dimples AND your blush. Tara gave her a pat on the back for the double victory. You opened your mouth to give a sly reply back, however your response was cut off by someone calling out for you.
“Y/N!! You in to play some beer pong?” You looked at Tara apologetically for the disruption and invited her to play along with you as a pair.
You both were up against another pair, which was obviously experienced beer pong players at that. You were willing to drink the cups that your opponent successfully had thrown the ball in, but Tara insisted on drinking it while you focus on throwing the ball. Understandably, both of you lost and while you thanked them for the round and lost gracefully, Tara stomped off like a little kid while mumbling swear words to herself, evidently affected by the amount of alcohol she had to drink. You chased for her and found her in the kitchen, mixing different liquids to create an abomination of a drink.
“Tara, you had enough for tonight don’t you think? Let me walk you home.” You suggested while taking her cup away as she was right about to sip it, making her whine. Tara turned around and looked at you as if you had said the most ridiculous sentence she had heard in her lifetime.
“NO!!! Please, let’s just stay a lit-little longer. I p-promise I’ll behave. I just want to spend time with you.” Tara begged and slurring her words, while learning against you for your warmth, and looking up at you with those undeniably adorable doe eyes, giving you the best puppy look she could express.
“We can talk on our way to your apartment, okay? I promise I won’t leave you alone” Tara huffed and rolled her eyes, but continued leaning against you for support. You only made it to the threshold of the exit holding her beside you until you couldn’t handle it anymore with how Tara kept moving around and losing her balance. You offered to give her a piggyback ride, which she immediately accepted after nodding her head enthusiastically.
“Why didn’t- didn’t you text me? I was waiting..waiting for you all along, man, fuck” Tara slurred, having hiccups in between her sentences.
“I’m sorry Tara, would you feel better if I said I was too nervous to text you?” You replied smugly, which made her wrap her arms around your neck a little tighter. You could feel a sudden warmth on the side of your neck, indicating that Tara was blushing. “Cute” You thought.
“Whatever..Whatever, dude. I just wanted to ask what horror movie you preferred,” Tara tried to shrug off and tried to act nonchalant as if your silence for the past 2 weeks didn’t bother her.
“I loved watching Terrifier 2. Art the clown really is a masterpiece,” You softly commented. You’ve reached the entrance of Tara’s apartment and entered the lift, softly asking what level she lives at before the lift door closes. You’re surprised you that didn’t feel tired of carrying her at all. Even after walking atleast 2 miles from the party. Most of the time carrying her home was in silence, since Tara was falling in and out of sleep.
“Me too!! I-lloved watching him kill random people” You walked her towards her door, slowly getting her on her feet and stabilizing her when she was swaying around clumsily.
“Oh yeah? Well, I heard the new Terrifier 3 is coming out. Maybe we could watch it together during the premier? Like, a date?” You suggested, blush slowly creeping up from your neck to your cheeks. You knocked on the door, hoping Sam was awake to bring her in.
“Yes.” Tara simply replied while nodding insistently. You chuckled at her boldness.
“It’s a date then. We’ll talk about it when you’re sober and having a massive hangover tomorrow, okay?” Tara nodded her head, her arms snaking around your neck to pull you closer. Your hands landed at her waist, feeling her being overly warm, probably from drinking too much. You decided to lean in and give her a kiss on her cheek, holding it for a little longer just to tease the shorter girl.
When you pulled back, you could see her blushing, probably not expecting the kiss. However, she decided to lean in this time, and now aiming for your lips. Just as both your lips brushed each other, the door opened, revealing Sam looking upset with wide eyes. You both pull back, with you coughing awkwardly under Sam’s gaze. Tara entered her apartment after saying her goodbyes, leaving you and Sam. You tried to talk to her, but ended up backfiring after she rolled her eyes and slammed the door on you even before you could utter a syllable. You made your way home and tried to ignore the interaction with Sam by occupying your mind with the younger Carpenter. You know talking to Tara won’t be easy due to her overprotective sister and friends, but you’re always up for a challenge, especially for a girl you’re falling in love with.
On the other side of the door, Sam was relentlessly scolding Tara, since she didn’t inform her of the party she was going to attend and that she had been worried sick the whole day. The least she expected was Mindy or Chad sending her home. Not you. Tara ignored Sam and went in her room, and plopped down on her bed with a huff, and fell asleep not even 5 minutes in.
The next day, Tara woke up with the most excruciating throbbing headache, it got worse when Sam continued her nagging about her going to parties without informing her. It took her awhile to adjust herself, with eating breakfast and taking a hot shower. She realized her phone had died since yesterday and decided to charge it. When it turned on, the first notification she saw was from you.
Y/N: Heyy, hope you’re feeling better.
Sent at 11.33am.
Y/N: And I’m also hoping you didn’t forget the date we planned. Looking forward to seeing you soon :)
Sent at 11.36am.
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kind of arranged marriage au with gojo, where it is suddenly proposed during a big meeting that he attended out of pure convenience rather than his own desire and he is thoroughly disinterested in the idea until you come into the picture.
dragged into the room with two guards holding you up by your arms as you writhe in their hold, so bratty and feisty, unintentionally catching everyone’s attention as you curse the men by your sides — satoru finds your voice to be very familiar, but he can’t understand why because your hair is all over your face from your squirming.
and when you are not so gently put down on the floor, with your kimono in disarray while you are huffing and panting as you blow the strands of hair away from your face, satoru finally recognises you.
he watches as the guards let you go, cautiously watching you as you fix your kimono and smooth down your hair, and when an old lady approaches you they go away. some old man appears by his side, shakily introducing himself to satoru, but he completely ignores the man, still waiting for you to be alone to proceed. suddenly, this whole event becomes a lot more entertaining.
the old lady by your side points at the other side of the room and satoru follows her directions along with you — catching the sight of naoya zenin and the disgusted look you grant the lady before she whispers something into your and you direct your gaze at him.
the delight satoru feels at the sight of the death glare you send him is on another level. it is really you.
while he waits for the right moment, gojo takes in what the old man has been saying to him — apparently you were to be wedded either to him or to naoya, which could explain your previous interaction with the lady and the dirty look you gave the zenin guy.
the moment the old lady leaves you alone, satoru appears, languid steps approaching you as he shoves his hands in his pockets and bends forward, smirking down at you.
“oh i remember you. 2005, exhange event, fukuoka branch?”
you continue glaring at him, unwilling to dip into the memories he is sure he has brought back into your mind — your glossy lips twitch, though, so he knows you have a lot to say. he can tell you haven’t really changed from the first time he met you, but for some reason you are holding back now.
“haven’t changed, have you? the same bratty attitude, all bark and no bite.” he continues to rile you up, hoping that the condescending tone of his voice will bring something out of you. it seems to work because you hiss out a reply not even a moment later,
“and you’re still the same asshole, aren’t you?”
the sight of your balled fists, burning with potent cursed energy, makes his smirk grow, and he only chuckles.
“easy, tiger, we both know you are in no position to speak to me like that.”
your eyes widen at his words, feet taking you away from him as you gulp down whatever response you had in your mind. the fact that he has so much control over your life right here right now scares him just as much as it excites him, but the cruelty of his words is far bigger than what he has in mind.
at the end of the day, you are quite a pitiful sight.
he could just say ‘no’ and you will be basically sold to the zenin for your pretty face, very much aware of the tormenting you will be forced to go through to become a picture perfect wife for naoya. everyone knows that. you know that.
he looks down at your fists, seeing the unstable flickering of the energy around it, making him raise a wondering brow at that and causing you to hide your hands behind your back. your technique was something you were very proud of back then, and seeing you being self-conscious now was a confusing sight.
“what happened to being a sorcerer and all? did you give up so easily after your class lost that summer?”
you click your tongue at him, crossing your arms over your chest as you look around warily.
“i am forbidden from using my technique.”
“too bad at it?”
“no, asshole. i can’t work because i could hurt myself and it would be a liability to—” you close your mouth, a deep frown appearing on your forehead as you sigh. satoru, ever the patient, urges you,
“to what?”
you take a deep breath, covering your face with your palm, “to my reproductive system.”
oh. right. the clan heads are obsessed with him having an heir so it’s no wonder something like this even happened. though, satoru does feel pity brewing inside of him when he realises that you’ve been deprived of your life’s work and made to become something you clearly were not. he remembers your 16 year old self being very adamant on becoming the best of the best after losing to them for the nth time.
satoru makes a show of rubbing his chin, as if in deep thought, and then gasps, a wide smile appearing on his lips as he leans down to be on your eye level again.
“so, what do you think about becoming my wife?”
“everyone here knows that you don’t want to get married.” you glance at him in utter confusion, untrusting of his words.
satoru nods, smirking lazily, “i don’t. never said it’s gonna be a great marriage.” he takes a lock of your hair between his fingers, twirling it lightly while he continues, “it’s gonna save you, though.”
“what’s in it for you?”
“i get to save your day like the true hero i am and have the old geezers off my back,” he holds out his hand for you, an offer for you to take it and agree to this whole thing, “and you get to lead a semi-normal life with me. are you in or not?”
your eyes roam over his features before turning to the room full of people before you. everyone was staring at him and you, satoru already knew that, and as soon as you were to put your hand in his — chaos would ensue.
so you did. and thus, a different life started.
#– len writes ✨#arranged marriage was inspired by the great @nezuscribe and her gojo au#love that one#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x you#gojo satoru smut#gojou x reader#jjk gojo#gojo x reader#gojo saturo#gojo satoru x reader#gojou satoru x reader#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x you#gojo#gojo x you#gojo satoru fluff#gojou satoru x you#gojou x you
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reblogging comment review by @zyafics
i’m alive i’m here (i’m fulfilling my duties bc damn a bitch went offline for 9 days and is behind on everything 😭) ⬇️
You drifted to your room, collapsing onto the small bed. The familiar scent of home did little to soothe the ache in your chest. It didn’t feel right. It never did, only when your brother was around, but now, not even that thought gave you faith as you closed your eyes, picturing Rafe’s face. His smile, his touch, his voice – they were all painfully vivid.
ugh i miss ur writing sm i love how this scene felt “slow” like u were navigating this lagged moment with her because nothing felt real
As you both settled in, the familiar warmth of his presence was a small comfort, a reminder that despite everything, you were still here together.
i don’t give a shit the one thing i love more than romance stories is sibling relationships 😭 they’re my heart n soul
"He’s facing several charges, but the severity of his sentence could depend on his cooperation. If he agrees to testify against his father, the authorities might offer him a deal."
i fear he won’t do it 😭😃
“You’re too good, y’know that? Personally, I don’t give a fuck if he dies.”
jj 😭😭😭 leave her alone 😭😭😭
"Complicated? Complicated is being stuck on an island, wondering if your sister is alive or dead. Complicated is dealing with the fact that the guy who put us through hell gets to play hero for a day and suddenly he's got your sympathy."
screaming into my pillow ur dialogues r too good
A carbon copy of your mother, your punishment.
okay pause ✋🏼 not the thematic parallel to abusive and neglectful parental figures i cannot handle this
You were just trying to find a shred of humanity in someone who had shown you a glimpse of it.
THIS LINE EATS SO HARD 😭😭😭
“Is that what you tell yourself to make you feel better?”
my jj would swing at ur jj for the way ur talking to ur sister
“Because I want to!” You screamed even though you hadn’t meant to. Tears of frustration fell as you raised your head, “And as far as I’m concerned, I’m still my own person and I can make my own decisions.”
PERIOD!!!!
“He was good to me.”
girl *I* held my breath
Sarah never pushed you to talk, never demanded explanations. Instead, she just sat with you, shared a laugh or two, and let the silence speak for itself. It was a strange comfort; one you hadn’t realized you needed until it was there.
i love ur sarah sm mines a bitchhh 🙂↕️✋🏼
“No. Uh, a friend, I guess—” You were about to ramble, not too certain of what to say, but settled for, “Can you tell him Maybank’s calling?”
WHY DO I FEEL LIKE HIS PUNK ASS IS GONNA BE LIKE “i don’t know a maybank”
"I’m sorry. Mr. Cameron has requested not to speak with you," she said. "Is there anything else I can assist you with?"
YOU PUNK ASS BITCH
You screamed until your throat was raw, until you had nothing left to give.
no i didn’t (personally cannot scream LOL)
Six months had passed since that day
what the actual fuck
You had spent the afternoon alone, lounging in the living room with a half-read book and a broken fan that did little to ease the stifling heat.
such good imagery god i love this
Your words caught in your throat as you saw him standing there.
my heart is pounding omg
“You had six months.”
YIKES 😬
You looked at him, searching for any sign of deceit. His eyes were clear, more focused than you had ever seen them. “Why should I believe you?”
i’m shaking rn pls give a girl some respite
Rafe looked offended, eyes zeroing in on your lips before his gaze met yours. That's when you felt it again, “I never lied to you.”
i’m throwing punches into my pillow rn biting my teeth ohmygod
Rafe’s expression softened, and he reached out tentatively, his hand stopping inches from your arm. “I’m sorry, baby.”
go away demon 👹 @ gigi
It’s only then, when your brain cleared slightly that you noticed he looked different. His hair had been buzzed, his skin looked tanner than the last time you’d seen him, he looked healthier.
oh we’re in season 3 now ok
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “I’m so sorry.”
i’m literally scraping my fingernails against chalkboards rn pls stop this madness 🛑🛑🛑
Rafe paused in the doorway, his back to you. His voice was barely above a whisper, but it carried clearly through the thick air. "I don’t regret it," he repeated, his shoulders tensing as he spoke.
gonna die ok 🪦
You had tried so hard to suppress your feelings, to deny the depth of your connection with him. But this…wasn’t something that could be easily forgotten or ignored. You had been so afraid to admit it, fearing that acknowledging would destroy you.
You were in love with Rafe Cameron.
oh my fucking god u did it again
final thoughts — ohmygod. i dont know why i kept putting off reading this? i think a part of me was scared because the literal content warning was “aka angst” and i said no. anyways, first and foremost u done it again gigi. what i was so impressed about this chapter was ur ability to create such flowing, strong and long dialogues. the one between jj and reader i read twice because i can’t believe how naturally-paced this story goes through that u don’t even realized it’s chunks on chunks of dialogues. that’s such an incredible feat and knowing now that ur from europe and english is probably a second language? the way u select the right words at the right time is an talent i strive to have. i’m like re-editing in my head being like “would i come up with that?” and being like “yeah i would’ve ended it there (bc i don’t know how to elongate a scene) but gigi knew how to keep it going.” gigi, when i tell u that’s one of the most impressive skills i’ve ever seen in my life i’m so serious. also, the way you structure and keep a consistent flow of emotions. the beginning of the story is stretched out in a way that i cinematically imagined a lagged moment. yk how in euphoria where it drags a scene from one part to the next? like that. and then the ending, when i said i was shaking, i was truly shaking. u had my heart clutched in ur hand and u just SQUEEZED IT 😭 💔 the way i felt everything and was so scared and panicking and my eyes wanted to read ahead because i wanted to know what happens but i also wanted to enjoy the writing 😭 u got me doing mental gymnastics trying to figure out how to read 😃 i thoroughly enjoyed this to the very end and ngl, i am so scared to read the next chapter i think imma hold off for a min…
THE OTHER SIDE OF PARADISE - rafe cameron (+18) - five
request: "a rafe enemies to lovers 🫣 the reader is jjs sister the whole drama before but then she gets left behind on the ship and rafe ends up comforting her and then yea that’s all I got you can do whatever else the rest 😛"
warnings: angst <3333333 for everyone <33; might need some editing bc im too tired to check everything but yeah
word count: 7.7k
The ride back to home was a blur. The plane ride, the ferry.
Everything.
Every mile that took you further from Rafe felt like a wound being reopened. The police officers tried to engage you in conversation, but your responses were monosyllabic at best. They eventually gave up, letting you stare out the window in silence.
When you finally arrived, the sight of the familiar streets of The Cut did little to comfort you. Your house felt alien, a place you barely recognized. The officers escorted you inside, their presence a reminder of the reality you were returning to.
“Your brother and your friends were rescued from a remote island a while ago. He was informed of your whereabouts an hour ago, he’ll be here soon.”
Their words barely registered.
You nodded numbly; your mind still stuck between the events that had unfolded just two days ago.
What kind of sister had you turned into? Barely phased over the fact your little brother was thankfully alive and well? You were supposed to protect him.
Sensing your detachment, they exchanged a look before retreating to the porch, giving you some semblance of privacy.
You wandered through the house, your steps heavy. Each room felt like a snapshot from another life. The couch where you and your brother used to bicker over TV shows when Luke spent days doing God knows what, the kitchen table where meals were shared and stories were told, only between you two– they all seemed like relics of a past you could no longer touch.
Things would never be the same, you knew that.
You drifted to your room, collapsing onto the small bed. The familiar scent of home did little to soothe the ache in your chest. It didn’t feel right. It never did, only when your brother was around, but now, not even that thought gave you faith as you closed your eyes, picturing Rafe’s face. His smile, his touch, his voice – they were all painfully vivid.
That must be your punishment.
A soft knock on the door jolted you from your thoughts. You sat up, heart racing. Your body was still on high alert, every little noise sent shivers down your skin. The blasting of the gunshots was still deeply rooted in your brain. It hadn’t even been three days.
The old wooden door creaked open, and your brother's face appeared, bright blue eyes wide with concern. He rushed to your side, pulling you into a tight embrace nearly knocking the air out of your lungs.
"Holy shit,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion, “Holy shit.”
You clung to him, the dam breaking as tears streamed down your face. The sobs wracked your body as JJ held you like you used to hold him. It devastated you. It felt so disappointing. He was never supposed to be the one carrying the family burden, you were. After what felt like an eternity, you pulled back, wiping your tears. Your brother sat beside you, his eyes searching your face.
“You’re not hurt?”
You took a shaky breath, trying to find the words, but all you managed to blurt out was a small “No. You?”
“No,” JJ nodded, lips pursed into a tight line as if he was figuring out what to say next, “They told me about the shooting.”
Your heart sank further at his words. You had hoped to avoid talking about it, at least for a little while. But he was watching you like he used to when you would act as a human shield for him, you couldn't brush it aside.
“I’m fine, I promise.” You reached out and squeezed his hand. "What about you? How did you get off that island?"
JJ let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head.
“It was a mess. We were stuck there for weeks, trying to find a way out. Pope and Kie kept us sane, but it was rough. We finally managed to signal a passing boat, and they rescued us. But the whole time, I couldn't stop thinking about you."
You squeezed his hand tighter, guilt and gratitude warring within you.
"I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm so sorry, JJ."
He shook his head vehemently. "No, don't apologize. None of this is your fault. I—I should’ve saved you on that ship, okay? It’s on me, not you.”
You’d cry again if you didn’t feel like your body was about to collapse, “You did everything you could. We both did. It's not your fault."
“The one time we changed places, and I couldn’t do it.”
"Jay—"
"I should have been there for you," He insisted, "I hated it."
It was your fault, not his. You pulled him into another hug, trying to convey with your touch what words couldn't express. The weight of your shared guilt and pain was almost suffocating, but at least you were together. You felt his body shaking, whether, from exhaustion or emotion, you couldn't tell.
When you finally let go, you took a deep breath, hoping to find some semblance of strength.
"We’re gonna be okay.”
JJ nodded, though you could see the doubt lingering in his eyes. "I know. It's just... hard."
"I get it. But we're both here, we're alive.”
A small, sad smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "Yeah, I guess you're right."
The two of you sat in silence for a while, it was a fragile peace, but it was something. The familiar sound of the waves crashing against the shore outside the window was a reminder that life continued, even when it felt like your world had stopped.
"Do you think things will ever go back to normal?" JJ's voice was quiet, almost hesitant.
If he only knew. The one time you managed to close your eyes and sleep you were plagued by nightmares of JJ finding out what you’d done. About you and Rafe. It made you want to scratch your skin raw.
“Yeah.”
You could see the exhaustion in his eyes, a mirror of your own fatigue. You knew you both needed rest, but the thought of sleep was daunting. The nightmares felt too close, the darkness too suffocating.
"Let's try to get some sleep," You suggested softly, though you weren't sure you could follow your own advice. "We both need it, ‘kay?”
JJ nodded, but you could see the wariness in his eyes. He laid down next to you, the bed barely accommodating the both of you.
As you both settled in, the familiar warmth of his presence was a small comfort, a reminder that despite everything, you were still here together.
The minutes ticked by in silence, the only sound being the rhythmic crashing of the waves outside. You focused on that, letting it be your anchor. Slowly, the tension in your body started to ease, the weight of the day’s events beginning to lift, even if just a little.
"Do you remember the first time we went out on the boat alone?" JJ's voice was a whisper in the darkness, a fragile thread connecting the past to the present.
A small smile tugged at your lips. "Yeah. You insisted you knew how to steer, and we almost ended up crashing into that sandbank."
He chuckled softly. "We were so scared. But you figured it out. You always did."
The memory was a bittersweet reminder of simpler times, a time when your biggest worry was navigating the boat, not navigating the chaos your lives had become. When you weren’t a complete fuck up.
Exhaustion finally began to overtake you, your eyes growing heavy. JJ's breathing evened out beside you, a comforting rhythm that lulled you closer to sleep. You wanted to tell him everything, but you couldn’t. Not without losing him in the process.
Sleep came slowly, but when it did, it was deep and dreamless. Completely void, much like yourself these days.
Morning came too soon, sunlight filtering through the curtains and casting a warm glow over the room.
You blinked awake, disoriented for a moment before the events of the past days came rushing back. JJ was still asleep beside you, his face peaceful in repose.
Carefully, you slipped out of bed, not wanting to wake him. The officer who comforted you after the shooting promised to call as soon as he got an update on Rafe’s condition. And so far? No call.
You wondered if the hospital or the police had contacted Sarah. She was Rafe’s closest family, aside from Wheezie who was still a kid, and Ward who was a sought-out criminal. It made sense that they would reach out to her.
If you rang the hospital, they wouldn’t disclose a thing, you weren’t family, and it wasn’t like you could ask Sarah. She would know something was wrong the moment you asked about Rafe. It was risky.
The kitchen felt eerily quiet, the early morning light casting long shadows on the walls. You made yourself a cup of coffee, the warmth a small comfort against the chill that had settled in your bones.
Sitting at the table, you sipped slowly, trying to come up with some sort of tangible plan. You wanted to know if he was okay, needed to know, but every option seemed fraught with risk.
Your new phone buzzed on the table, jolting you from your thoughts.
You picked it up, heart pounding as you saw an unknown number flashing on the screen. You hesitated for a moment before answering.
“Hello?”
“This is Officer Thompson. I promised I’d keep you updated on Rafe Cameron’s condition.”
You closed your eyes, thanking God for finally giving you some piece of mind, “Yes, thank you.”
“He’s stable,” Officer Thompson continued. “The surgery went well, and he’s in recovery. It’ll be a while before he’s fully back on his feet, but he’s out of immediate danger.”
The knot in your stomach loosened slightly. “Thank you for letting me know.”
There was a pause on the other end.
“I know this is difficult, but you should focus on your own recovery too. There’s a chance the feds will contact you, they’re building their case on Ward. What happened to you is, unfortunately, considered a minor crime compared to everything he’s done, so maybe you’ll get some peace. If not, you might have to testify against him.”
The idea of having to testify against Ward made you uncomfortable to no end. Reliving those moments in front of a courtroom full of strangers seemed unbearable.
“And Rafe? What are his charges?”
"He’s facing several charges, but the severity of his sentence could depend on his cooperation. If he agrees to testify against his father, the authorities might offer him a deal."
A deal. It was a slim chance, but it was something. You hated yourself for the weight that left your shoulders. He should be locked up, you knew that, back then you prayed for the day he paid for what he did and yet here you were, holding on to any possibility of freedom.
You thanked Officer Thompson again and ended the call, setting your phone down with a shaky hand. The coffee had grown cold, but you didn't have the energy to make another cup. You sat there for a long moment, staring into space, trying to gather your thoughts.
The sound of footsteps drew your attention, and you turned to see JJ standing in the doorway, his hair tousled and eyes still heavy with sleep.
“Who was that?” He asked, his voice still groggy.
“Uh—Officer Thompson. He was at the scene the other day and told me he’d keep me updated.”
JJ tilted his head, his messy bed hair following suit, “Updated on what?”
“Rafe’s condition,” You replied, the words feeling heavy on your tongue. It was a half-lie. At least you were giving him something.
JJ stopped in his tracks, “And you care because…?”
“For closure, I guess.”
JJ’s gaze softened slightly as he walked over to the table, pulling out a chair and sitting across from you.
“You’re too good, y’know that? Personally, I don’t give a fuck if he dies.”
You winced inwardly. "JJ, you can't just say stuff like that.”
He leaned back in his chair, brows furrowed. "Why not? After everything he’s done, he deserves whatever he gets."
You couldn't argue with that, but part of you still felt the need to defend Rafe. He saved your life.
“He’s still a human being, okay?”
JJ scoffed, shaking his head. "Barely.”
You didn’t know why you suddenly felt so angry, so defensive. But it made its way up your body until your lips were moving again, practically spitting the words out.
“He saved my life.”
Your brother stared at you like you were speaking another language, “Saved your life? Are you serious? It’s his fault you were there in the first place!”
“He chose to help me. And I can't just forget that."
JJ ran a hand through his hair, clearly agitated.
"This is insane. One good deed doesn't erase all the bad he's done."
You reached for his back, “I know that.”
He pulled away from your touch, your fingers only brushing against his shirt, “Do you?”
His retreat felt like a knife to your heart. JJ had always been your rock, the one person you could count on. Seeing him look at you with such disbelief and anger made you feel more isolated than ever. He looked at you like you’d imagined in your nightmares, but the real thing felt ten times worse.
"I’m not saying he’s a good person. I’m just saying… it’s complicated."
He paced around the kitchen table.
"Complicated? Complicated is being stuck on an island, wondering if your sister is alive or dead. Complicated is dealing with the fact that the guy who put us through hell gets to play hero for a day and suddenly he's got your sympathy."
"It's not sympathy," You insisted, your voice rising despite your best efforts to stay collected. You never raised your voice at him. "It's just... I don't know. I saw a different side of him. Maybe he can change. Or at least help put Ward away."
JJ stopped and spun around to face you, his eyes blazing. "And what if he doesn't? What if this is all part of some twisted game for him? People like Rafe don't just change, okay? They manipulate, they hurt, they destroy."
“JJ—"
“You sound exactly like her.”
You didn’t have to ask to know what he meant. Suddenly your entire soul felt like it was being drained out and slashed into pieces.
You spent a lifetime hearing it, from Luke.
A carbon copy of your mother, your punishment.
“Don’t say that.”
“That’s exactly the type of bullshit she would spit out about dad, wasn’t it? And look where it got her.”
Memories of your mother flooded back. The excuses, the false hope, and the endless cycle of pain and disappointment. You weren’t her, were you? Holding out for a man who was never going to change, who would only inflict pain upon your life? It couldn’t be. You spent your entire life making sure you were nothing like her.
It wasn’t fair.
You weren’t making excuses for Rafe as your mother did for Luke. You were just trying to find a shred of humanity in someone who had shown you a glimpse of it. You stood there, feeling the weight of his accusation like a leaden cloak.
How could he think you were blind to Rafe’s faults? You knew them all too well. Standing there in the kitchen, under the harsh morning light, you felt exposed, vulnerable, and fiercely defensive.
“I’m not her,” You finally managed to say, your voice cracking, “I’m not defending him like she did.”
“Is that what you tell yourself to make you feel better?”
Your eyes narrow into slits, “I’m not doing this with you, not right now.”
You turned away, your fists clenched at your sides as you fought to regain your composure.
He followed you hot on your trail, "Don't walk away from me.”
"I'm not defending him," You insisted, your back still to him, “I’m just trying to understand, okay?”
“Understand what? Jesus, Rafe is who he is.”
"And maybe he can change," You shot back, the words spilling out despite the tightening knot in your chest. "Maybe he saved my life because he wants to change."
"He's manipulating you," JJ retorted, his jaw clenched. "Just like he always does. You went through some traumatic shit together, but that doesn't mean you owe him anything."
You stopped dead in your tracks, turning to face him again. Your head was tingling, the headache already forming itself, and you felt hot all-over.
“Some traumatic shit?” You repeated, “Are you fucking serious?”
JJ raised both his hands, tangling them in his hair in frustration, “You almost died, and now you're here defending the guy who put you in that position?"
The accusation stung. You felt the heat rise in your chest. You hated fighting with your brother. You were letting your feelings for Rafe get between the two of you.
He shook his head, disappointment oozing from him in waves, "Good luck with that. Just don't expect me to sit here and act like everything's okay."
You blinked away the dryness in your eyes, "I'm not asking you to. Can't you see that maybe things aren't as black and white as they seem?"
“All I know is what he's done to us, to you."
"And what about what he did for me?" You shot back, the words bitter on your tongue.
“And what did he do exactly?" Your lips parted to speak, but words continued to spill from his mouth, “What did you do?”
You gave no reply, unblinking, short breaths escaping you. His accusation lingered in the air, challenging you to defend the indefensible. The truth was there, clawing at your mind, but you couldn't bring yourself to voice it.
Not to JJ, not yet.
"I don't expect you to understand," You finally said, voice strained, "But I’m not turning my back on him.”
JJ's eyes narrowed; frustration etched on his face. "Why?”
“Because I want to!” You screamed even though you hadn’t meant to. Tears of frustration fell as you raised your head, “And as far as I’m concerned, I’m still my own person and I can make my own decisions.”
He opened his mouth to respond, but the words seemed to evaporate. For a moment, the kitchen was filled with nothing but the sound of your heavy breathing and the instant regret that filled your bones.
Finally, JJ spoke, his voice low and strained. "Fine. Do what you want."
You watched as he turned away, his shoulders tense with anger or disappointment – perhaps both. His footsteps echoed loudly in the quiet kitchen as he stormed out, leaving you standing there, feeling raw and exposed. It was the first time you had ever raised your voice at him, and the aftermath left a bitter taste in your mouth.
Alone in the kitchen, you sank into your chair again, your energy completely drained. Part of you wanted to run after him, to explain, to make him understand. But he never would. None of them would.
Because unlike you, they weren’t stupid enough to sympathize with Rafe Cameron.
Sitting there, you couldn't shake the feeling that you'd crossed a line, one you might not be able to uncross. You stared at your hands, still trembling from the argument, and let out a long, shaky breath. What was it about Rafe that had such a grip on you?
You heard the front door open and close, a clear sign that JJ had left the house. Maybe it was for the best, giving you both time to cool down. You got up to pour the coffee down the sink, the sound of the liquid swirling away a tiny comfort.
You spent the entire day locked away in your room, avoiding any kind of social interaction, or the sun. Your phone buzzed again, and for a moment, you considered ignoring it.
You picked it up, expecting another call from Officer Thompson, but the name on the screen made your heart skip a beat.
Sarah.
With a deep breath, you answered. “Hey sweets.”
“Hi,” Sarah’s voice was almost unsure. “JJ and the police called earlier, told us what happened. Are you okay? I’m on the mainland with John B, we’re taking the next ferry back home.”
You closed your eyes, somewhat relieved that you wouldn’t have to face them yet.
“Yeah, I’m…Managing. I'm okay.”
“Good, that’s good,” There was a pause, and then she asked, “Have you heard anything about...Rafe?”
Had the hospital not called her? The question hung in the air. You had, but you didn’t know how much to share.
“He’s stable. The surgery went well.”
Sarah sighed, “Good. That’s good to hear I guess.”
“Sarah,” You began, hesitating. “Did the hospital call you?”
There was a long silence on the other end before she replied, “Yeah. But I…I don’t know. I just couldn’t bring myself to answer. I knew it was coming after the police called. But—Yeah, it’s just, it’s really hard.”
You didn’t know what to say, “I’m so sorry.”
“You’re the only one not giving me shit about still…caring? I guess. He’s my brother, you know? And I want to hate him, so bad, but I can’t.”
"I get it, Sarah. He's your brother. It's okay to feel conflicted."
"Yeah," She exhaled heavily, "But I don't know how to deal with it. He's done so much harm, and yet. I keep hoping there's still some good left in him. I know there's no hope for my dad, but Rafe..."
She had seen him before Ward turned him into this. She still carried the guilt of reveling in their father’s approval, the clear favoritism that she never stood against for her brother, even though she could see her father’s fingers printed on Rafe’s cheeks.
Her words echoed your inner struggle. You understood her—how love and hate could coexist in such a tangled mess when it came to family.
“He was good to me.”
There was a long pause.
You expected her to hang up on you, to call you a list of degrading names, all of which you felt you deserved. She had suffered deeply at the hands of her brother— the same brother you had come to care for, despite knowing the full extent of what he’d done.
But you underestimated her.
Caught between your own anxiety and the dread of truth being exposed, you momentarily forgot just how compassionate and noble Sarah was. She possessed a goodness that mirrored your own—loyal, forgiving, and endlessly understanding.
Both lovers and fighters.
"I know, the feds told me about the shooting," Sarah finally said, "And I think that's what makes it so hard. Picturing him as the same monster from before was a lot easier.”
You nodded even though she couldn't see you, feeling a deep ache in your chest. "Yeah."
"I don't know what to do," She confessed, her vulnerability cutting through the distance between you. "Part of me wants to see him, to talk to him. And part of me wants to never look at him again."
"I think... whatever you decide, it's okay," You offered tentatively, not entirely sure if your words were comforting or just empty platitudes.
“John B disagrees.”
“Yeah, so does JJ.”
"I appreciate you telling me about Rafe," Sarah continued, her voice softer now, more vulnerable. "I... I don't think I could have handled hearing it from anyone else."
You felt a pang of guilt. "I'm sorry you had to hear it like this, sweetheart. I wish things were different."
"We all do," she replied softly. "Thank you.”
“Of course," You said, "Take care of yourself.”
"You too. We'll see you soon, okay?"
"Yeah. See you soon."
The call ended, and you stared at your phone for a long moment, the screen dark and lifeless, much like yourself lately.
You spent the next few days in a haze, avoiding JJ and the rest of your friends as much as possible. You’d only seen Sarah. Somehow her presence didn’t make you feel as nervous as you thought. It weirdly calmed you down. You’d always been close, ever since she joined the group, but now you felt like she was the only one who understood your point of view.
You knew Pope and Kie wouldn’t, and you couldn’t blame them.
Sarah never pushed you to talk, never demanded explanations. Instead, she just sat with you, shared a laugh or two, and let the silence speak for itself. It was a strange comfort; one you hadn’t realized you needed until it was there.
The small house felt like a prison. It wasn’t until a week later, as you sat on the beach watching the waves crash against the shore, that your phone buzzed with a message. It was the officer: "Rafe’s awake."
Your heart leaped into your throat. You still hadn’t told anyone the full extent of what had happened between you and him, and you weren’t sure you ever could. They knew he was in the hospital, that you two had gotten caught in a shooting, that he’d somehow saved your life. That was it. But now, with him awake…You didn’t know what to do.
With trembling hands, you dialed the number the officer had provided. After a few rings, someone answered.
"Hello, this is St. Michael Hospital. How can I help you?"
You snap out of your daze, "Hi, I'm calling to check on a patient, Rafe Cameron. I was told he’s awake."
There was a pause, the sound of keyboard keys clicking. "Yes, Mr. Cameron is awake. Are you a family member?"
“No. Uh, a friend, I guess—” You were about to ramble, not too certain of what to say, but settled for, “Can you tell him Maybank’s calling?”
“Okay, just a minute please.”
The hold music was the only thing keeping you centered on the moment, each note heightening your anxiety. When the nurse returned, her tone was pitiful, and you knew then that you weren’t going to like her answer.
"I’m sorry. Mr. Cameron has requested not to speak with you," she said. "Is there anything else I can assist you with?"
You wanted to hurl the phone into the ocean, plunge your head underwater, and only resurface when the ringing in your ears ceased.
What the hell?
You had spent weeks on edge, consumed by thoughts of him, hoping he would survive, praying for him despite not believing in that sort of thing. You didn't have it in you to put up a fight.
"No, that's all. Thank you." You ended the call and stared at your phone.
Rafe didn’t want to speak with you.
You felt foolish, as if you were just now glimpsing the bigger picture and recognizing that maybe he didn’t care after all. Perhaps, on the island, you were the one thing keeping him grounded, but now? Now you were back to being a nobody, just a pogue.
It felt like everything you had shared was for nothing.
Had you imagined it? No, you knew you hadn’t.
Rafe had kissed you and touched you with the tenderness of a lover, as if you were precious and any rough movement might break you.
The moments you had shared, the way he had saved your life—maybe they didn’t mean as much to him as they did to you. The bond you thought you had formed with Rafe was, perhaps, a desperate attempt to find something good in the chaos.
The waves crashed against the shore, the sound a distant roar as you sat on the sand, a storm brewing inside. You tried to hold it together, to keep the facade of normalcy for a little longer, but it was getting harder with each passing day. This felt like it was the final straw.
Without warning, a scream ripped from your throat, raw and unfiltered. It echoed across the empty beach, a primal release of everything you had been bottling up.
The anger, the confusion, the hurt—it all came pouring out in that one moment. Tears streamed down your face, mixing with the salty sea breeze.
You hadn’t cried properly in weeks.
You screamed until your throat was raw, until you had nothing left to give. The sun cast long shadows on the sand, the beach deserted except for you. Collapsing back onto the sand, you let the tears flow freely.
There was no one to judge you, no one to see you fall apart. You’d spent a lifetime pulling yourself together, it was only fair you finally got to breathe properly. When the tears subsided, you wiped your face with the back of your hand and took a shuddering breath. The tightness in your chest began to ease, replaced by a hollow ache.
You were many things, but none of them were weak and yet...It was almost unbearable, the way your mind replayed every interaction, every look, every word, searching for signs you might have missed, clues that would have warned you not to get attached.
The sound of footsteps in the sand pulled you from your thoughts.
You turned to see JJ approaching. Your heart sank; you weren’t ready to face him after the argument. He sat down next to you, silent for a moment as he followed your gaze out to the horizon.
When he finally spoke, his voice was softer than you expected.
“I’ve been thinking about what you said.”
You nodded, unsure of what to say.
“I’m sorry for what I said about Mom,” he continued, his tone filled with regret. “I shouldn’t have compared you to her. That wasn’t fair.”
You swallowed hard, the tension easing slightly from your shoulders. “It’s okay, JJ. I know you didn’t mean it.”
“I did, and I didn’t,” he admitted. “I just... I don’t want to see you get hurt. I don’t trust him, and I hate that you’ve been caught up in all this.”
“He doesn’t want to talk to me.”
He glanced at you, eyebrow raised. “What do you mean?”
“I called the hospital. They said he’s awake, but he doesn’t want to speak with me.”
Your brother frowned, his protective instincts flaring up. “That fucking asshole. After everything—”
You shook your head, cutting him off gently. “Maybe it’s for the best. Maybe he’s right.”
JJ’s expression softened, and he reached out, placing a hand on your shoulder.
“Hey, don’t do that. Don’t blame yourself. You did nothing wrong.”
A lump formed in your throat, but you nodded, trying to believe his words. “I just... I thought there was more to it. That maybe he could change.”
“People like Rafe... it’s hard to change.”
“Yeah.”
“But that doesn’t mean you’re wrong for wanting to see the good in him.”
He spoke with such gentleness and wisdom. You forgot he wasn’t a kid anymore. That he’d also done his fair share of growing up way too fast.
You leaned into his touch, “I know.”
“We’ll get through this,” JJ said firmly. “Together. You and me, like always.”
“Love you.”
“Love you too.”
As the sun began to set, casting a warm glow over the beach, you and JJ sat there in silence. The waves continued to crash against the shore, a reminder that life moved forward, even when it felt like everything was falling apart.
Maybe things would never go back to the way they were, but you had your brother, your friends, and a resilience you hadn’t known you possessed.
⋆ ✧・゚: *✧・゚⋆ ✧・゚: *✧・゚⋆ ✧・゚: *✧・゚⋆ ✧・゚: *✧・゚⋆ ✧・゚: *✧・゚⋆ ✧・゚: *✧・゚
Six months had passed since that day.
Life had settled into a fragile semblance of normalcy. The days were longer now, summer heat pressing down on The Cut, making the air thick and heavy. You had spent the afternoon alone, lounging in the living room with a half-read book and a broken fan that did little to ease the stifling heat.
You were lost in your book when a loud, insistent banging on the door jolted you from your reverie. Few people would knock with such urgency.
The forceful banging on the door didn’t stop and you jolted upright.
Without thinking, you got up and flung the door open, irritation flaring. "What the f—"
Your words caught in your throat as you saw him standing there.
"Rafe?" You blurted out. You immediately tried to close the door in his face, but he was quick. His hand shot out, holding it open, "Are you kidding me?" You hissed, pushing harder against the door.
"Maybank—"
"If you don't get off my property, I swear to fucking God—"
"Wait!" Rafe's voice was strained, his hand trembling as he held the door open. "Just listen for a second."
You glared at him, every instinct telling you to push harder, to shut him out. But something in his eyes—fear, desperation, a flicker of the Rafe you once knew—gave you pause.
The last time you saw him, he was bleeding out and terrifyingly pale.
The last update you had on him was from Sarah, months ago. He had left the hospital and kept sporadic contact, reaching out to her only every few weeks.
You never asked her about his well-being or what he was doing; despite guessing that he was cooperating with the police. At least you hoped he was.
You were determined not to care anymore.
He leaned his weight against the doorframe, “You look good.”
You were going to slap the lack of common sense out of him.
You scoffed, not letting your guard down. “What are you doing here?”
He looked down, struggling to find the words as he scratched the back of his head, “I... I needed to see you. To talk.”
“And I need you to crawl back to whatever hole you just creeped out of, have a good day.”
You tried to push the door shut again, but his grip tightened. “Please, just give me a minute.”
“You had six months.”
“I know, and I’m sorry. I was— It’s messed up, okay? I’m still working with the feds. I was losing it. Still am, probably. But I need to explain. Please, Maybank, just a minute.”
You hesitated the anger and hurt battling against the small, lingering part of you that still cared.
Finally, you stepped back, letting the door open just enough for him to enter.
“Talk,” you said, your voice icy.
Rafe stepped inside, looking around your small living room as if seeing it for the first time, which you now realized he'd never been in your house.
He turned to face you, his expression earnest. “I didn’t know what to say. I felt—“, He took a deep breath, cheeks puffing, “Ashamed. I don’t know.”
You crossed your arms over your chest, keeping a safe distance between you.
“Ashamed? You’ve done a lot of things to be ashamed of. You can’t just show up after six months and expect everything to be fine.”
“I know,” He admitted, taking a deliberate small step closer to you, “I wasn’t expecting that. I just... I wanted to tell you that I’m trying. I’m in therapy and rehab, trying to get clean. I’ve been going to meetings. It’s been hell, but I’m trying.”
You looked at him, searching for any sign of deceit. His eyes were clear, more focused than you had ever seen them. “Why should I believe you?”
He took a deep breath, visibly struggling to find the right words.
“Because you’re the only person who ever saw anything good in me. And I can’t forget that. I don’t deserve it, but I need you to know that your faith in me wasn’t for nothing.”
The vulnerability in his voice took you by surprise. You had expected anger, arrogance, manipulation—but this was different. Genuine. It felt like you were back in that motel room, in his arms.
You let out a scoff, focusing your gaze on the couch you were just resting on, as you shifted your weight on your feet. “Is that all?”
Rafe's eyes darted to the floor, “No, it’s not all. I just—Shit. I need to make things right. With you. I don’t know how, but I need to try.”
You took a deep breath.
Part of you wanted to believe him, to give him another chance, but the other part of you—the part that had been hurt and abandoned—was screaming not to fall for it again.
“You didn’t even want to talk to me when you woke up.”
He looked up, guilt etched across his features. “I didn’t know how to face you after everything that happened. I was a mess.”
“So you shut me out?” You snapped, “You made me feel like I meant nothing.”
“That’s not true,” He snapped back, head whipping up, then immediately softened his tone, taking another step closer. “That’s not true. You mean more to me than you’ll ever know. I was getting better for you."
“Don’t lie to me.”
Rafe looked offended, eyes zeroing in on your lips before his gaze met yours. That's when you felt it again, “I never lied to you.”
“Cameron.”
Another step closer. His eyes pleading with you to understand.
You were staring up at him now, the look on your face completely unreadable. You were waiting for an answer, but he had a feeling that no matter what answer he gave, it wouldn't make a difference.
"I never lied to you," He repeated, his voice shaking slightly. "I was scared and confused, but I never lied.”
You felt your anger rising again, every muscle in your body tensing as you tried to keep control. “Scared and confused? That’s your excuse?”
Rafe flinched at your words, but he didn't back down. “I know how it sounds. I handled it all wrong. I’m trying to fix it.”
“You think saying sorry and showing up out of the blue makes it better? It doesn't erase the months of silence.”
His hands reached out, his palms open as if he was dealing with a wounded animal. “I’m not asking for forgiveness right away. I just want a chance to make things right.”
“You don’t get it, do you?” You spat, your voice trembling with emotion, “How it felt, watching you almost die. I spent days wondering if you were going to be—”
You stopped yourself, knowing that if you continued your voice would crack and the tears would start pouring down your cheeks.
You already cried enough for him.
Rafe’s expression softened, and he reached out tentatively, his hand stopping inches from your arm. “I’m sorry, baby.”
You took a step back, putting more distance between you, needing the space to think clearly. “I needed you to be sorry six months ago.”
It’s only then, when your brain cleared slightly that you noticed he looked different. His hair had been buzzed, his skin looked tanner than the last time you’d seen him, he looked healthier.
Rafe noticed your eyes wandering to his head and ran a hand through his short hair, a hint of a self-conscious smile flickering across his lips. “Yeah, I uh, made some changes. Trying to start over, I guess.”
You nodded slightly, not quite trusting yourself to speak. Finally, you broke the silence, your voice steadier now.
“I’m happy for you, but I can’t do this.”
“Pretty—"
You sighed, rubbing your temples as you cut him off, “I feel guilty enough as it is around everyone else.”
“I told Sarah.”
His words hit you like a punch to your gut.
“What?”
“About us.”
You felt your stomach drop and your vision narrow, the world tilting sideways as the reality of what he just said sank in. “You what?”
“I told her.”
“You absolute fucking—” You hissed, your voice rising without warning, “Are you serious?!”
“I thought it was the right thing to do,” His tone faltered to one that could’ve fallen on deaf ears if not attentive enough. “I needed someone to talk to, and she’s…my sister.”
“You thought it was the right thing to do?” You were shouting now, unable to contain your anger. “You think spilling everything to Sarah was the right thing to do? Did you ever consider how that might affect me? Or her?”
Rafe flinched, taking a step back. “I didn’t think it would be this bad.”
“Of course you didn’t,” You nearly growled, pacing the small living room. “You never think about anyone but yourself, do you?”
“Listen— “ He opened his mouth undoubtedly to fire back with another half-assed apology - but you barreled forward, letting the months of bottled resentment continue to burst open.
“You’re so selfish.”
“She promised she wouldn’t tell anyone,” His throat bobbed in an audible gulp, “It’s okay.”
“You really believe that?” You stopped pacing and turned to face him, your hands clenched into fists at your sides. “This is too much for her to keep to herself. It’ll eat away at her until she tells someone. And when that happens, my life here is over.”
Rafe looked stricken, his face pale. “I just—I needed someone to understand what I’m going through.”
For the first time, he took the time to explain what was going on in his head instead of letting his frustrations take over and kissing you.
“And what about what I’m going through?” You demanded. “Did you ever stop to think about that? I’ve been trying to move on, to rebuild my life, and you just waltz back in and blow everything up.”
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “I’m so sorry.”
You spotted his sun-kissed freckles. They wouldn’t be noticeable if you hadn’t looked at him so closely before.
“Sorry doesn’t fix this,” Bitterness began to overpower the pit of your heaving chest, “Sorry doesn’t make it go away. You can’t just undo what you’ve done.”
“I know,” One shaky hand scrubbed over his face, refusing to meet your wide-eyed stare., “But I’ll do whatever it takes to make it right. I swear.”
“Make it right? You can’t make this right, Rafe.”
“I don’t know what else to do,” he said, his voice breaking. “I’m trying, pretty. I really am.”
You felt a smidge of sympathy despite your anger. You could see the pain and desperation in his eyes, the same pain and desperation you had felt for the past six months. But that didn’t change the fact that he left you hanging for so long.
“I need you to leave,” you said finally, your voice cold and distant.
You expected him to put up a fight, to lash out, hide his emotions with empty threats and petty names. But he didn’t.
Instead, he nodded, his shoulders slumping slightly as he turned to leave. You watched him go in silence.
Part of you wanted to run after him, to give him another chance, to believe that he could change. But another part—the part that had been wounded and left to heal on its own—knew that it wasn’t that simple.
You had to protect yourself, even if it meant shutting him out for good.
Rafe paused in the doorway, his back to you. His voice was barely above a whisper, but it carried clearly through the thick air. "I don’t regret it," he repeated, his shoulders tensing as he spoke.
You blinked, taken aback. "What?"
He turned slightly, just enough for you to see the raw honesty in his eyes. "I don’t regret what happened. Between us. I regret how I handled it, how I hurt you, but I don’t regret feeling something real for once."
The words hung in the air, and for a moment, the suffocating heat seemed to dissipate, replaced by a cold clarity. You crossed your arms tighter around yourself, trying to hold onto your anger, your resolve. But his words had hit a nerve, bringing back memories you’d tried so hard to bury.
You looked away, unable to look at him, "It doesn’t change anything."
"I know.”
With that, he turned and walked out the door, the door clicking shut behind him, leaving you standing there. The room felt emptier than it hand in months as you leaned your forehead against the cool wood over the door.
You pushed away from the door, needing something to distract yourself.
You picked up your book, but the words blurred on the page. You tossed it aside, your thoughts too chaotic to focus. Instead, you paced the small living room, replaying the conversation in your mind.
You eventually collapsed onto the couch, staring blankly at the ceiling. You did the right thing, so why did it hurt so bad?
You felt like a wound had been reopened, and you hated him for it.
But you hated yourself more for letting him get to you. The hours dragged on, the sun dipping below the horizon and casting long shadows through the windows. You tried to lose yourself in anything—TV, reading, cleaning—but nothing could shake the gnawing feeling of unresolved problems that clung to you.
You only saw Rafe's face, his desperate eyes, his trembling hands.
You remembered the feel of his skin, the sound of his voice when he was vulnerable. The memories were too real, too persistent. You couldn't bring yourself to explain it to yourself. Your eyes begin to itch, warning you to think of something else.
Anything else but Rafe.
Was this heartbreak? No—it couldn't be.
You weren't in love with Rafe Cameron.
At least, you didn't think you were.
You had never allowed yourself to consider it, to dwell on what you felt for him. But now, in the stillness of your small living room…it was different. You never had a good parental figure to teach you these things.
All you knew was destruction, violence, and heartbreak. And although you’d done pretty well for yourself, all things considered, this was new to you.
The thought hit you like a tidal wave, overwhelming and inescapable.
You had tried so hard to suppress your feelings, to deny the depth of your connection with him. But this…wasn’t something that could be easily forgotten or ignored. You had been so afraid to admit it, fearing that acknowledging would destroy you.
You were in love with Rafe Cameron.
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The Return
Batter Up Chapter 7
Pairing: Baseball player Joel Miller x Female Reader Rating: Explicit. 18+ (Minors DNI) Summary: After a month of being away from the game and the girl he loves, Joel Miller is back and ready to play. Warnings: smut, making a sex tape, oral (f receiving), unprotected p in v (reader has an IUD), cream pie, also regular pie, joel miller's dirty mouth, wine. Words: 5,000
A/N: Thank you to my dearest @devineconjuring and her beautiful brain for beta'ing and being my grammar goddess.
Masterlist Playlist
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The crowd chants Joel’s name, lights flicker through the stadium, the ground feels like it’s shaking beneath his feet. He loves this feeling—the rush of adrenaline coursing through him, the loud crowd drowning out every doubt he’s ever felt. After three weeks on the injured list and another week rehabbing in the minors–a month away from the big leagues–Joel Miller is back.
He walks to the plate, digging his heels into the dirt and tapping his bat against the plate as he soaks in the moment.
“Miller, good to see you back,” the catcher says.
Joel nods, and grunts an acknowledgment back.
His eyes settle on the pitcher, some young phenom throwing 99-mph with almost every pitch. Don’t worry kid, you’ll get old like me.
The first pitch whooshes past him—ball one.
Ball two.
Strike one.
The pitcher’s keeping it a little outside, Joel inches closer to the plate, squaring up. The pitcher winds up again, Joel takes a deep breath, feeling the vibration of the bat as it connects with the ball. The crack of the bat reverberates through the stadium as the ball soars past the infield, over the outfield, and disappears beyond the right-field fence.
Home run.
The crowd erupts, the celebratory bell tolls as he rounds the bases. His eyes scan the club box above third base, finding you amidst the cheering fans, your arms raised high, that smile of yours lighting up his heart.
Joel Miller is back, doing what he loves, and now in front of the woman he loves.
__
You’re so proud of him. You wipe the tears from your eyes as Joel’s feet touch home base. His recovery wasn’t easy. Every week away from the game for someone as old as him means double the work versus a young kid just in the game. Forty year olds aren’t known for being pro athletes.
With the long Labor Day weekend, you were able to take time off from work and travel by train to Philadelphia to witness Joel's celebrated comeback, which had turned into a legend after his grand slam. Suddenly, all of your worries are lifted away. The stress of telling your families that you're a couple, your demanding job as a column writer at Sporting Digest that revolves around the ebb and flow of games, trades, and record breaking moments–none of it matters now.
Your responsibilities at work have been stacking up over the past few weeks. Churning out articles on everything from college football predictions to analyses of NBA draft picks. When you were hired you agreed to not cover baseball, what with the conflict of interest and all. Now, you dream of the headlines you could write about your boyfriend’s triumphant return.
You’ve barely been able to leave your laptop. Last week, you spent three days shadowing a tennis star at the US Open, scribbling notes on her training and the pressure of being labeled the “next big thing.” You’ve barely had time to breathe, let alone do laundry, go grocery shopping, and, most importantly, be there for Joel. You put in countless hours of work to make this long weekend possible, just so you could witness his big comeback firsthand.
“Heck of a player that Miller is,” you hear the TV in the corner say. “He sure knows how to show everyone he’s still got it, doesn’t he?”
You clutch his number dangling from your neck, you’re so proud of him, always proving everybody wrong. Well worth every sacrifice.
__
The Liberties win, 4-0, all thanks to Joel’s grand slam in the first inning. Sports radio is going to have a field day with this.
You make your way down to the stadium’s corridors, where staff rush around with more important tasks than yours.
The Liberties clubhouse sits just ahead of you, the two large blue doors stay closed to onlookers. You rest your back against the cold cinder block wall and send Joel a text, telling him to take his time.
A year ago, you never could’ve imagined this. Joel Miller—rugged, no-nonsense baseball star, the man who occupied your teenage dreams—now your boyfriend. The man who keeps your favorite pasta sauce in his pantry. The man who goes mattress shopping with you. It feels surreal, yet so real at the same time.
Every time that damn blue door opens your heart skips a beat, hoping you’ll find Joel walking out. False alarm after false alarm.
Until…
Joel emerges, hair slicked back, wearing a gray Liberties shirt, khaki pants, and those cheesy white New Balance sneakers you tease him relentlessly about. Joel, you’re way too rich to be wearing these damn ragged shoes.
“Hi baby,” he smiles as he wraps his arms around you, pushing you further against the wall.
“Hi,” you breathlessly respond, smelling the body wash on his skin. Damn, he showered. “Good game.”
“It was, wasn’t it?”
You can’t help but smile at how happy he is, back where he belongs, doing what he loves.
“Come on,” he says, pulling you close. “Let’s go celebrate.” His arm stays around your waist as he leads you through the corridors to his car.
It’s so freeing now, being able to cheer for—and love—Joel out in the open, for all eyes to see.
__
“You know you made me cry today, right?” you say, reaching for his hand resting on your thigh.
“I did, huh?” he replies with a smirk on his face.
He always looks so confident as he drives. Philly’s narrow streets, filled with potholes and pedestrians, are nothing like Austin’s, but he navigates them as effortlessly as he does everything else—injuries, tough teammates, media storms. He handles it all like he handles a fastball: with ease.
“Yeah, I’m really proud of you,” you tell him softly, grabbing his hand harder. “I know I’ve said it a hundred times, but I’m just so happy to be here for you.”
He smiles that quiet Joel smile. “That’s how I feel watching you handle everything too.”
"So, where are we headed?" you ask, noticing you're not on the route to his apartment. “I hope I’m dressed okay,” you say, looking down at your simple red gingham dress.
"It’s a surprise. You’ll be fine, you look beautiful baby," he says.
The car winds through the city. You glance over, watching the city lights flicker across his face as the car turns off the main road, slipping into a quieter neighborhood.
The car pulls up to a small, unassuming brick building tucked away on a quiet side street. No flashy sign, no valet—just a discreet, vintage lantern hangs above the door. It’s definitely a place Joel prefers.
He turns off the car and turns to you, his hand still resting on your thigh. “Thought we’d keep it low-key,” his deep voice rumbles in the quiet of the car.
You nod, your smile widening. “Perfect.”
He steps out of the car and, ever the gentleman, comes around to open your door before guiding you toward the entrance. You wrap your arm around his, leaning into his warmth as he leads you inside.
—
“Mr. Miller, welcome to Vetri Cucina. We’re happy to have you here. Let me show you to your table.”
“Silvio," Joel says with a firm handshake. "Good to see you. Thanks."
Your eyes scan the cozy space. Shiny worn floorboards, warm amber walls, a glistening chandelier that hangs from the low ceiling–you’ve never seen a place like this before. Little did you know that behind the unassuming brick row home exterior there would be a whole functional restaurant. It feels like the perfect mix of a place for the two of you, rustic and intimate.
Silvio leads you both up a narrow staircase to a private room on the second floor. A table for two sits in the center of the room. A red glass chandelier hangs above it, candlelights flickering shadows across the golden walls..
“So, we’re still hiding our dinners with each other away from prying eyes?” you tease as Joel pulls the chair out for you and you take a seat.
“Not exactly,” he says, taking your hand in his. “I just wanted to show off that I can get us a private table at one of the best restaurants in Philly.”
You laugh. “I’m sure there’s a Golden Corral around here.”
Joel chuckles. “Very funny. But trust me—you’ll love it here. They’ve got all the fancy dishes with those French words you like.”
“You know me too well.”
“Better than you think,” he says, his eyes gleaming under the golden light.
—
A waiter approaches, a polished smile on his face. “Good evening, and welcome. My name is Royal, and I’ll be taking care of you tonight. We have a special tasting menu prepared just for you, personally selected by our chef. It’ll start with an appetizer, followed by a pasta course, a main, and dessert.”
Your mouth waters as Royal pours you a glass of wine.
”Each course will be paired with a wine from our grand collection. Your first course will be out shortly. In the meantime, is there anything else I can bring you?”
Joel shakes his head. “We’re all set, thanks.”
“Wow,” you say once the waiter leaves, glancing around the elegantly set table. “I feel a little underdressed for a tasting menu.”
Joel shrugs. “I have a feeling they won’t care what we’re wearing once I pay the bill. Besides,” he says with a smile, “I like you in that red dress.”
“Atta boy, Texas,” you say, smiling as you sip your wine.
—
After a couple courses of delicious appetizers that you happily eat, but Joel barely touches, the water returns, presenting the main course with a flourish.
"For your entrée, we have our signature dish: salt-crusted tilapia with a bread salad of parsley and tomatoes, alongside grilled artichokes on a bed of smoked squash puree."
You glance at Joel as the waiter expertly cracks the salt crust, revealing the perfectly cooked fish underneath. You know Joel hates fish and artichokes. The waiter sets down two glasses of white wine and disappears, leaving you both alone with the dish.
"Baby, what are you going to do?" you ask, eyes wide as Joel picks up his fork.
“Don’t worry about me. I’m here to impress you,” he says with determination before spearing a piece of the fish. He takes a bite, his nose crinkling ever so slightly as he chews.
“How is it?” you ask, biting back a smile.
Joel grimaces. “I’ve had better.”
You chuckle softly, shaking your head. “Please don’t eat it. I know the only fish you like is fried.”
“Always been more of a Filet O Fish man myself.”
“I don’t think they’ve got tartar sauce here, so please, for me, don’t force yourself.”
He sets down his fork with a relieved sigh, his hand finding yours again. “Anything for you.”
When the waiter returns, he doesn’t comment on Joel’s barely touched plate, but you notice a subtle, appreciative smile as he clears away your empty dish.
“Well,” you say, leaning back, happy and full from dinner. “At least there’s dessert.”
“Never said no to dessert,” he chuckles, before looking you in the eyes with adoration.
"You know," he begins, his voice low and serious, "I couldn't have done this without you. Coming back after my injury—”
Joel's voice trails off as he searches for the right words. His eyes stare into yours. You squeeze his hand encouragingly, needing to hear more.
“It wasn’t just physical,” he continues. “It was mental. Wondering if I still had it within me, if I was too old, if it was time for me to hang up my cleats. But you—you never doubted me for a second.”
Tears pool in your eyes as his thumb brushes back and forth against your knuckles.
"I’ve always been your fan, Joel. I’ll always believe in you.”
He nods, a small smile lighting his face. “I know, and that’s what got me through. I love you.”
“I love you too,” you smile through tears.
The waiter approaches with dessert, you silently thank the interruption so you’re not left sobbing in the middle of this beautiful restaurant over how much you love your boyfriend.
A familiar slice of pie is placed in front of you and Joel.
“Uppercrust?” you excitedly ask, your eyes widening at the large, glazed pecans laying atop the golden crust.
Joel gives a shy, satisfied nod, his lips curving into that familiar, gentle smile. "Thought we’d end the night with our favorite. Had Sarah overnight it to the restaurant."
“Jooooel,” you breathe out, overwhelmed by his thoughtfulness. You stare at the pie, stunned by how deeply he cares for you.
“All for you baby,” he says softly as he lifts his fork and cheers with a playful smile. “Cheers to Austin and that hotel bar.”
You laugh, grabbing your own fork and tapping it against his. “Cheers,” you whisper, trying to steady your voice.
“Oh my god,” you moan around the fork at the first taste of sweet pie. “I can’t believe you got this. You’re too good to me.”
He barks a laugh. “Baby, this is nothing, I owe you so much.”
The pie is sweet, but your boyfriend is sweeter.
The sweet wine served with the pie warms your body, Joel’s smile from across the table warms you even more. You sneakily slip your foot out of its sandal, and run it up his leg, making your way up to his crotch. He jumps in surprise, his eyes leer at you as he takes a sip of wine. Your foot finds its target, against the soft fabric of his pants, thankful for the white tablecloth that hangs from the table. He places a hand on your foot, pushing it closer to his crotch. You giggle as your toes wiggle back and forth, teasing him.
“So, what’s next?” you ask, with a mischievous grin.
"Well, after we finish dinner, I'll pay the bill, grab some leftover pie for later...and then take you home and fuck you," he responds confidently.
A small hmph escapes your lips at the promise. “Is that so?”
“Oh, it absolutely is,” he replies, a sly grin spreading across his face. He leans in close, his voice lowering to a secretive whisper. “Just think about it—my place, those fancy sheets of mine you love so much…”
His hand wraps around your foot, pressing it harder against him.
“Now you’re just making me impatient,” you tease.
—-
The plates are cleared, the leftover pie is boxed up, Joel settles the bill and rises from his seat, extending his hand to help you up.
Your fingers lace together as you step out into the warm summer night. Joel leads you to his car, unlocking it and opening the door for you. You lean over and seal your mouth over his, relishing in being able to kiss him out in the open. You pull away and give him a smirk before getting in and sliding across the passenger seat, your heart racing with anticipation for the next stop—Joel’s apartment.
Your time together has been precious and few. Your career keeps you north in New York, Joel’s training and rehabilitation game have kept him busy and all over the states. But now, you finally have three nights together—the most time you've had since his injury a month ago.
He glances over at you and winks before he adjusts the rearview mirror. You miss his truck back in Austin, the front bench seat allowing you to slide over and cuddle him close. You curse the existence of the center console.
“Buckle up, baby,” he says with a grin. Your heart races at the double entendre.
—-
Taking the elevator up to Joel's penthouse brings back memories of that first night together, when you couldn't believe how handsome he looked in that golden elevator at the hotel, not believing you were about to sleep with Joel Miller. Now, his body presses against yours as you lean on him, his head nestled in the crook of your neck as he leaves sweet kisses down your skin to the matching pendant of his number you wear, leaving a kiss against it before his eyes meet yours.
“I can’t tell you how much I love seeing this on you, baby,” he says before licking his way up to your mouth, sealing his over yours. He grabs your ass, lifting you into his hold, your legs instinctively wrap around his waist, your arms wrap around his wide shoulders.
The elevator doors open and he carries you into his penthouse, crowding you against the entryway wall. His mouth moves against yours with fervor, deepening the kiss as your fingers tangle in his hair. You gasp against his mouth, the cool wall chilling your overheated skin.
“God, you’re so beautiful,” he murmurs between kisses, his breath warm and sweet against your lips. “I’ve missed this—missed you.”
He turns and carries you to the living room. The ambient city lights shining in from the floor-to-ceiling windows light Joel’s way. He gently sets you down on the couch and slides his hand to the back of your neck, pulling you closer for another kiss.
“Let me show you how much I’ve missed you, baby,” he whispers against your lips, pausing to look into your eyes.
You nod, breathless and eyes wide. “Please,” you whisper.
He grins, standing back slightly, taking in the sight of you sprawled on his couch, dress askew. “You look so damn good.”
His hands rest on the hem of your dress and, with a cocky grin, he slowly lifts it up, exposing the soft skin of your thighs.
“God, this is all I’ve been thinking about. Drove to the ballpark thinking about you, stepped up to the plate thinking about you, and, baby,when I saw you in the stands… all I could think about was you naked in my arms.”
“Joel…” you struggle to find the words, already lust-drunk on his words.
“I need to taste you.”
He drops down to his knees in front of you, his large fingers slipping beneath the waistband of your underwear and sliding them off.
You bite your lip as he grips your thighs and spreads them apart.
He breathes out a deep sigh at the sight of you. A low whistle leaves his lips. “There she is, she’s so fuckin’ pretty.”
He leans closer and places soft kisses along your inner thighs, teasingly slow, making your heart race even faster.
“Joel…” you plead.
He spreads you wider, warm breath teasing against your core. He licks a long, slow line from bottom to top, humming appreciatively at the first taste of you.
Your back arches, a gasp escaping your lips. "Oh my God," you breathe.
His rough palms grip your thighs, thick fingers digging into the flesh as he holds you steady. His hot breath tickles your skin as he licks you. "God, you taste so good," he murmurs against you, his voice vibrating against your cunt. “Missed this taste.”
His tongue explores you as your fingers tangle in his hair, gripping the soft waves of his dark strands.
Two thick fingers slide inside you, stretching you perfectly. Plush lips close around your clit, sucking and lapping at your sensitive nub.
It's been almost a month since he last touched you like this, and now with his skilled mouth and fingers all over you, your body is ready to let go.
“Joel,” you moan. “C-close.”
He enthusiastically hums against you, deep brown eyes staring into yours from under furrowed brows. His fingers pumping in and out of you as his tongue flicks rapidly over your clit. Your pussy pulses against his thick fingers, squeezing them as you bloom under the pleasure of finally feeling his touch. Goosebumps rise all over your skin, cheeks heating, legs trembling, and your eyes tightly shut… and when he curls his fingers upwards inside you, your orgasm crashes into you, your pussy soaking his hand and your voice screaming his name. He doesn't stop, continuing to lick and tease you through your orgasm until it's all too much and you're pulling at his hair.
He pulls back with a satisfied smile and kisses your inner thigh before standing and placing a kiss on your lips. You taste yourself as he licks into your mouth. His plush lips sucking against yours.
Before you can catch your breath, Joel scoops you up in his strong arms, throwing you over his shoulder and carrying you into his bedroom. You giggle as he smacks your ass and growls.
He sets you on the edge of his bed, the crisp white sheets cool against your overheated skin. He steps back, his eyes roaming over your body.
“Stay right there,” he says as he moves to the closet, rummaging around for a moment before returning with a black camera and tripod in hand.
Your breath catches at the sight as he sets them up, carefully adjusting the angle.
The tiny red recording light blinks on and the little screen lights up. There you are, all disheveled—dress hiked up, your lips full and swollen from Joel’s mouth.
His eyes meet yours. “Is this okay?” he asks softly.
You nod, excitement running through your body. “Yes,” you breathe.
He grins as he removes his shirt, tossing it to the side before he steps out of his pants. He stays behind the camera, standing in the shadows like a director. “Go ahead baby, take it all off.”
You stand slowly, your heart racing at Joel and the camera’s attention. Dark brown eyes watch you intently from behind the camera, his eyes never leaving your every movement. You reach back and unzip your dress, pulling it down, as you slowly slip the straps off, letting the dress fall to the floor, the red gingham fabric pooling at your feet.
"God, you're gorgeous,” he whispers.
You reach behind to unclasp your bra, staring at Joel as you let it fall away. Your breasts are exposed to his eyes and the camera, your nipples hardening in the cool air. You’re completely bare now except for the necklace with his number.
"Touch yourself for me, baby," he instructs softly.
You smile, running your hands slowly up your sides, cupping your breasts. Your fingers glide over your nipples, teasing them to stiff peaks before you back up against the bed and lay across it, spreading your legs wide for the camera and Joel. Your hand snakes down your body, across your stomach, down to the apex of your thighs.
You lock eyes with Joel as you slowly circle your clit, your breath hitching. His gaze is dark from behind the camera, his chest rising and falling rapidly. You can see the outline of his cock straining against his boxer briefs as he watches you pleasure yourself. Your fingers dip lower, sliding into your wet heat.
"That's it, baby," he groans. "Show me how you like to be touched."
Your other hand kneads your breast, pinching and rolling your nipple.
Joel steps out from behind the camera, moving to the edge of the bed. He strips off his boxers, his thick cock springing free. He strokes himself slowly as he watches you.
"You're so fucking sexy," he growls.
You whimper at his words, your fingers moving faster. "Please, baby,” you whine, “I need you."
He grabs your foot and turns you on the cool, slick sheets. Glancing over at the camera’s small display screen to check the angle of your body.
He climbs on the bed and you instantly welcome the warmth of his presence and his broad body. He positions himself between your legs, gripping his cock and running the head through your folds, coating himself in your wetness. Your breath catches as he slowly pushes inside, a smile lighting your face at finally feeling him inside you.
"Fuck," he groans, his eyes fluttering closed as he bottoms out. "You feel so good, baby. So tight and wet for me."
You moan as he starts to move, his hips rolling against yours in a steady rhythm. Your hands glide over the expanse of his shoulders and down his muscular back, relishing in feeling the flex of his strong muscles with each thrust.
He leans down, capturing your lips. His tongue tangles with yours as he picks up the pace, fucking you harder.
"Look at the camera, baby," Joel murmurs against your neck. "Let's show it how good I make you feel."
You tilt your head, looking directly at the camera lens with heavy-lidded eyes. The knowledge that you are being recorded, that Joel will watch this later, that the two of you will get off while watching yourselves… it’s a new thrill for you. You moan louder, arching your back higher as Joel fucks you.
"Touch yourself for me," he commands.
Your hand snakes between your bodies, fingers finding your clit.
"Oh god, baby," you moan, your fingers working furiously at your clit as he pounds into you. "I'm so close."
Joel's rhythm falters slightly as he watches you touch yourself, sweat glistening on his brow. "That's it. Cum for me. Let me feel you."
Your voice echoes through the room as you cry out Joel’s name, your body trembling as your walls clench tightly around him.
“Fuck,” he grunts, his hips snapping against yours. “So fucking good, you cum so fucking good for me. So fucking tight.”
He pulls your body towards him, sitting up on the bed, his cock still buried deep inside of you. You take control and ride him, your legs wrapping around his waist as you grind down on him. His hands grip your hips firmly, guiding you.
“That’s it baby. Take what you need from me,” he growls.
Your hands tangle in the short waves of his hair, pulling him in for a kiss. Your tongues exploring each other’s mouths, bodies glistening with sweat.
He breaks the kiss, his forehead resting against yours, his nose bumping against yours. “I love you. God damn baby, I love you so much.”
“I love you too,” you moan as he thrusts up into you.
He captures your lips again. “I’m close,” he groans against your mouth. “Cum with me baby. Give me one more.”
His hand snakes down between your bodies, his thumb finds your clit, rubbing firm circles against it as you bounce on his cock.
You cry out his name as you orgasm, Joel’s fingers and cock working in tandem to push you over the ledge. You turn your head to the camera, staring into it as you chant Joel’s name while your walls clench around his cock.
“Oh fuck baby,” Joel groans, his hips stuttering. “I’m gonna cum for you.”
In one swift motion, he flips you onto your back, your legs instinctively wrap around his waist as he buries his face into the crook of your neck, his hot breath fanning across your skin as he chases his own release. Your hands run down his back, feeling the flex of his muscles with each thrust.
"Cum for me, Joel, I want to feel you cum inside me."
With a final and deep thrust, Joel stills above you. He groans your name as he empties himself inside you, his cock pulsing with each spurt. He fills you with his release, still gently fucking you with soft thrusts, pushing his seed deeper inside you.
He leans over and grabs the camera, his cock still plunged deep inside you. With a sly smile, he films your face, capturing the bliss across it.
“Look at you,” he admires, “smiling all sweetly, all drunk on my cock and cum, aren’t you baby?”
You moan a response and nod eagerly.
He chuckles as he pulls out, shuffling his body down to settle in between your legs. Joel positions the camera between your thighs, spreading them apart and running a finger through your cunt, swollen and slick with his spend pulsating out of you.
“Look at you, leakin’ everywhere,” he groans, collecting himself across his fingers and sticking it inside you. “Can’t have that, now can we?”
His eyes stay focused on the little screen, watching his fingers pump in and out of your overworked cunt.
“Fuckin’ filthy baby,” he angles his fingers, your slick squelches loudly across the room.
Writhing and whining under his touch, your skin is overheated, your pussy radiating heat across your body.
He pulls his soaked finger out, wiping it across your folds. “Show me how you drip baby, let me see.”
A gush of his cum leaks out of you, the warm liquid runs down your ass, pooling on the bed.
“Fucccccccccck,” he growls. “Can’t stop looking at this.”
He zooms out, capturing your whole body in the frame.
“Tell me whose pussy this is,” he instructs.
“Yours,” you breathlessly respond.
“That’s it baby,” he growls, before his eyes lift from the camera and into yours. “I love you,” he softly says, his eyes rounding in reverence.
“I love you too.”
He grins, standing up from the bed and switching off the camera before placing it down on the bedside table.
“That was incredible,” you sigh. “I can’t believe we just did that.”
A smile spreads across his face as he leans down to give you a tender kiss on the lips. "We'll have to watch it later," he says before heading to the bathroom. He returns with a damp towel and gently wipes between your legs, before planting a kiss on your forehead and turning to leave the room.
“Where are you going?” you slur, too blissed out of your mind.
“To get pie. I’m starving.”
⚾️⚾️⚾️
Series Masterlist
#pedro pascal#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller fic#joel miller smut#joel miller fanfic#joel miller x you#joel miller fanfiction#joel the last of us#baseball au#baseball joel#joel miller tlou
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On Solas' Mythal regret
Alright so this is just one thing I wanted to get out there. I'm not gonna do one big meta post bc I wanna break down specific things more easily. I hope it's not too jumbled
Spoilers
The Solas / Mythal regret takes place in the Fade.
“What if you left the Evanuris, and remained with me? Surely you must want freedom from this struggle?”
Solas says it not just for Mythal’s sake but for his own; he is essentially begging for her to return to the Fade with him so they can be as spirits again... He doesn’t want to be a person, he never did, and now he can’t return to that life. He was happy in the Fade until she drew him out. Mythal says ‘love’ because she knows that he doesn’t want to be there and she needs to keep him loyal in order to keep the Evanuris at bay. We know that Mythal is manipulative af and this is just more evidence of that.
It’s a regret not just because he couldn’t get Mythal to leave the Evanuris but because it’s the moment he gave up on himself. He knew he couldn’t leave Mythal to do it alone, because he did care for her, but also he was likely bound to her after she pulled him from the Fade. We know that pulling spirits from the Fade makes them lose a part of themselves; in this case, Mythal did this to him deliberately so he would fight in the war.
It was a trauma bond, similar to the bond between Cole, the spirit of compassion, and the real Cole who starved to death in a prison cell. Solas needed to provide Wisdom to prove his purpose, and Mythal kept calling on that. In Veilguard, it’s explicitly stated that as a former spirit, he cannot resist appeals to his true nature. With trauma bonds, you do lose your agency. It’s what they hinge on. The two things combined make for a toxic dynamic.
(I don’t particularly like this personally, but it's what seems to be the intent, but I digress.)
The hidden codex in the Lighthouse’s music room—memories of a duet—is significant in understanding their relationship. To me this is very revealing of their dynamic; Mythal took advantage of Solas when he wasn’t used to having a body and moulded him to be a weapon. She moulded him into the image she wanted him to take, and strung him along the entire time. There’s a big parallel between Divine Justinia/Leliana and Mythal/Solas. Leliana’s personal quest in DAI is about her loyalty to Divine Justinia, whom she sees as a mother and great friend. You can ask her if they were romantically involved, and she says that they were many things to each other, but not that. She too carries a huge amount of guilt for her death, to the point that it can break her if you don’t soften her early on in the game, and she becomes utterly ruthless. The end scene with Mythal releasing Solas from her service has many similarities to Justinia releasing Leliana from hers. Leliana and Justinia were united in part because of their shared spirituality and hopes for the Chantry, and Solas and Mythal were united by the connection they forged as spirits. ‘Being wholly seen…’ Leliana felt the same way about Justinia.
Solas also wore Mythal’s vallaslin, and burned it off his face when he rebelled against the Evanuris. As we know, those are slave markings. He was made to become her servant, and rebelled against her too when he started the rebellion against the Evanuris. (As a side note, and especially if you’ve played BG3, you’ll know how the loss of agency can stick around even after the connection to the abuser has been severed. Astarion’s ‘you made me see that I never stopped thinking of myself as his slave’ really springs to mind here, albeit in a different context.)
This is a big part of why I don’t think he was romantically involved with Mythal. I believe his main role to Mythal in the initial war was as a kind of spymaster, similar to how Leliana is the spymaster for Divine Justinia. Mythal taught Solas to behave in exactly the way she wanted him to.
In fact, in the Inquisitor’s customisation screen when you pick your romance, Solas’s explicitly says that even he didn’t foresee what it would mean to fall in love. So… he canonically hasn’t been in love before. He was not in love with Mythal.
I wanna be clear here; I don’t hate Mythal as such. I mean, I do, because she’s pretty fucked up, but you have to consider her nature. She was a spirit of benevolence. She wanted to take a form because she was afraid of what Elgar’nan would do to the world if she didn’t stop him. Even after taking a body, she can’t change her nature. It became twisted into retribution when she couldn’t stop them from harming the elves or trying to leash the blight. Honestly I could write a whole essay about Mythal too, but I won’t because I still have a ton to write about Solas and Lavellan, but we’ll see.
Anyway I’m gonna leave this one here but I’ll be back with more meta. I have a lot of get through
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