#learning this kind of 100% internal honesty is really hard tbh like being able to stare at all your facets and hypocrisies and biases

[tsuchinokoroyale]

I want so badly to have the slut era I’ve never gotten to experience, but my boyfriend has such a viscerally negative reaction to the idea of being open 😔 I don’t know what to do 😭

Long-ish answer beneath the cut:

Eh I’d much prefer to be in my chill boyfriend(s) era but those just aren’t the cards I’m being dealt so I’m doing my best to enjoy my getting tossed around by handsome strangers era 🤭 my bit of unwarranted advice knowing nothing of your situation is to peek under the hood and really take a Mike’s hard look at what you value.

If you value the relationship more, you’ll probably just have to bite your lip and put some elbow grease into putting your imagination to work having some healthy fantasies. Write out some narsty smut or something and get those desires out in creative ways haha.

If you value the freedom to explore more, that’s a lot tougher. Cuz it is a legitimate feeling and I actually know a couple who divorced this year bc they’ve only ever dated each other since high school and that curiosity of what it would be like to date other people turned into a desire and that evolved into resentment at the other person for “holding them back” which was messy as hell. I’m not at all saying dump his ass but like ethical non-monogamy exists for a reason, like there are rules and agreements and arrangements you can put in place to respect those kinds of boundaries but if it is still a hard no, it’s back to weighing your values. I’ve known exactly 0 cases where going on a break to live out a slut era and then rejoining worked out in a healthy way so I would also advise against that.

Knowing so little about anything with your situation I would never call a verdict, but in my experience the fantasy of a slut era is alluring but also best relegated to fantasy. I have had my slut era(s) but they weren’t ever as hot or as interesting as finding ways to be slutty with the person I’m with, but I’m definitely one of the more monogamy coded-poly people out there so your mileage will vary 🙂‍↕️