#leahtails fic

[tessatales]

So… I’ve fallen quite hard into the Criminal Minds fandom again therefore please keep an eye out for the *maybe very* long fic I’m currently working on between Reid and an Original Character 😅😊

[tessatales]

Past scars and future hopes

Loki x F!Reader

Warnings: CONVERSATIONS ABOUT PAST SH! READ AT OWN RISK PLEASE.

A/N: Did someone say Loki one shot? No? Well tough your getting one. This fic is purely self indulgent as I’m recently 5 years clean 😊 so I thought to myself; what would I say to someone if they asked about my sh?

‘Good morning’ you said through a yawn, running your fingers roughly through tangled (y/h/c) hair as you plodded to the fridge.

A series of bright ‘good mornings’ and grumbled acknowledgements came from the Avengers Tower kitchen, each one distinct for who it came from.

‘You’re never up this early, what did you break?’ Natasha teased, pointing her cereal filled spoon in your direction before consuming the scoop.

‘Nothing! I’m going to school with Peter to help with his school project’ You replied as you poured yourself a coffee and returned the milk to the fridge.

Two distinct ‘Heys!’ erupted from the table.

‘Why did the kid ask you for help and not me?’ Tony grumbled, his eyebrows pinched together in the middle in mock anger.

‘Or me!’ Chimed Bruce, his face a little sad.

‘Because nether of you care about literature. Peter had to take extra credits in English to help his grade after he missed so much last semester, so I offered to help him with his spoken presentation’ Y/N replied, watching with a small smile as the two men visible relaxed.

‘How are you allowed in to help him anyway?’ Steve asked through a yawn.

‘It’s an open presentation, parents and friends are allowed to attend to listen.’ You reply, watching as recognition chimed in Tony’s eyes.

‘THAT’S what Peter asked me to come see! F.R.I.D.A.Y cancel my appointments I need to see the kid speak’ Tony said and you could laugh at how scatterbrained the genius could be.

‘Speaking of, as much as I’d love to sit here and watch Clint slowly wake up with that toast stuck to his face, I need to go get ready’ You said, draining the remains of your coffee before rinsing the cup and walking backwards towards the corridor that led to your room.

‘Clinnnnt’ You shout/sang as you went. Clints head shot up from his plate- the half eaten jam on toast firmly stuck to his left cheek. The team burst into loud early morning laughter.

You were so busy giggling, you didn’t realise you were walking into someone until you smacked straight into them. Before you had chance to hit the floor, a strong hand had you mid fall; their warm hand nearly completely circling your bare forearm.

‘You should really look where your going this early in the morning’ Loki said, his voice still laced with sleep.

‘Sorry Loki! I was to busy laughing at Clint’ You said, a small laugh escaping as you remembered the jam toast again.

When Loki didn’t reply, You looked up, realising with a start that Loki’s hand was now lightly caressing your upper arm; his callused fingers gently rubbing your faded self harm scars. Feeling a little self conscious, You gently slid your arm out of Loki’s grip.

‘I hate to hit and run Loki but I’ll be late for Peters project if I don’t get ready now’ You said, grinning before sidestepping Loki and running down the hall.

*Loki POV*

Loki wandered into the kitchen in a confused haze, his mind preoccupied as he made himself a drink. The avengers morning banter would of annoyed him when he’d first arrived at the tower, but now he’d come so accustomed to all of them that he (reluctantly) would say he enjoyed it.

‘Loki!’ Wanda shouted, her hand sparking red as she swiped the coffee pot from Loki’s hand. He’d been so distracted he’d overflown his cup.

‘What’s on your mind brother?’ Thor asked, a smug grin on his face as he finished his breakfast.

‘What kind of weapon could create small uniformed cuts on someone’s arms?’ Loki asked to no one in particular. The group stilled.

‘Why do you ask’ Natasha asked, her voice clipped.

‘Well I just quite literally bumped into Y/N and she had these marks all over her arms’ Loki said, staring into his drink as he thought.

‘Was she tortured?’ Loki asked to the silent room, surprised how much the thought of that turned his stomach. Tony shifted in his seat.

‘Loki, it’s complicated.’ Wanda said, her smile smaller than usual.

‘Why? Is it some classification I’m not qualified for? Or is it because you still don’t trust me’ Loki said, his voice becoming bitter by the end. Bruce groaned.

‘Look Loki, we’re not keeping you in the dark because your new or because it’s classified. It’s just not our story to tell. It’s Y/N’s’

‘So you’re telling me I need to ask her myself?’ Loki asked, frowning as to why they didn’t say that in the first place.

‘What we’re saying is it’s something only Y/N can explain. Just make sure you’re going into the conversation with an open mind.’ Steve said as he rose from his seat.

‘Not all battles are physical, but they may all leave scars Loki.’ Tony said, meeting Loki’s gaze.

Loki left the room more confused than when he’d entered, but one thing kept running through his head.

‘Not all battles are physical, but they may all leave scars Loki.’

Loki wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do, but he knew one thing- he had a lot of questions for Y/N when she got home.

*Your POV*

You had been home for hours and the buzz you’d gotten from the A* you’d helped Peter achieve had only just worn off.

Humming a nonsense tune as you brushed your hair; You hopped about your room, only remember that they could play music through F.R.I.D.A.Y rather than sing when a soft knock came from the door.

‘Come in!’ You shouted.

The door clicked softly as it opened, revealing the obsidian black hair of Loki and he peaked around the door.

‘Good evening’ Loki said, looking uncomfortable. You frowned at Loki’s formal greeting.

‘Hey, what’s up?’ You asked, frowning as you crossed the room to sit on your bed. Loki shut the door behind them but didn’t step away from the door. He was shuffling his feet like he was itching to leave.

‘Loki, if you wanted to stand and shuffle you could of done that outside my room’ You said with a laugh, trying your best to get a grin out of the god of mischief.

‘Y/N… when you bumped into me this morning. I um. I’ Loki said, stumbling over his words in the most un-Loki way. You already knew what was coming, so explaining now rather than leaving Loki so flabbergasted was better.

‘You noticed my scars, yes’ You said simply, nodding slightly. Loki exhaled.

‘Yes. Yes, I noticed your scars and I was quite confused about how they may look that way and then when I mentioned it to the other they began acting- odd’ Loki said, the long stream of words rushing out of him one one long huff. You blinked.

‘They we’re all being very cryptic and I was still so confused so I just thought I’d take the teams advice and ask you’ Loki said, his voice coming out in a rush.

‘Come sit down’ You said, smiling reassuringly before gesturing towards the space on the bed. Loki took the space cautiously, less because of the situation and more for the proximity.

‘Do you know what depression is Loki?’ You asked. Loki shook his head.

‘Well, I’d like you to think back to when you were at your lowest. When you felt the darkest shade of black in your soul.’

Loki frowned, but after a moment, he nodded.

‘How did that make you feel?’ You asked.

‘It felts horrible. Like my existence wasn’t worth the stardust used to create it’ Loki said, clearing his throat slightly as he finished. You nodded.

‘And how did you get out of that feeling?’ You asked, shifting slightly on the bed.

‘I took it out on the people around me’ Loki said, dropping his head in shame.

You put your had lightly on Loki’s knee.

‘It’s okay. Now imagine you have that feeling all the time. Every minute of every day. It taints every happy moment, every laugh and every positive moment in your life until you begin to see the world in a numb shade of grey’ You said, your eyes slightly glassy as you remember the feeling. Loki’s face pales.

‘Life that is numb and grey is just not life.’ Loki said.

‘Exactly, it’s just existing.’ You replied, taking your hand from Loki’s knee to pull up your hoodie sleeve.

‘So when you were at your lowest, you took it out on others. When I was at my lowest; I took it out on myself. It was hurt myself or kill myself’ You said, stretching your arm out to fill the space between you and the god. He looked suddenly terrified.

‘Not all battles are physical, but they may all leave scars’ You said, looking up from your arm to Loki’s face.

‘Stark said that earlier.’ Loki said, his voice quiet. You laugh

‘I said it to him first; when I had this very same conversation with him when I moved to the tower’ you said, remembering the bear hug you’d gotten from the whole team after your confession.

‘You took a blade to your own flesh to feel something? To stop yourself ending your own life?’ Loki asked, his face ashen, you nodded.

‘Why did no one stop you!’ Loki said, his voice surprisingly sharp.

‘There was no one to stop me Loki. I’d completely isolated myself from everyone.’ You said, taking his hand in yours and you spoke.

‘You don’t need to get emotional over it. I’ve been clean 5 years now. I’m happy now. And there’s no need to dwell on the past. That’s part of the reason I did it in the first place’ you say, trying to lighten the mood you could see forming in the gods eyes.

Loki cleared his throat, the heaviness in his chest unsettling to him.

‘Um’ Loki said, staring at your connected hands. You squeezed lightly.

‘Shall we go get dinner? I can smell Steve’s signature chilli and it’s making my mouth water’ you joke, trying again to cheer the god up. He nodded without speaking, taking his hand away quickly as he rose from the bed.

‘Y/N?’ Loki said as you both reached the door.

‘Hmm?’ you said, turning to face him in the now open doorway.

You were nearly swept off your feet as Loki enveloped you in a hug. His arms creating a comforting pressure across your body. He smelled like Night and spice and Other. It was lovely.

‘Thank you for telling me.’ Loki said into your hair, squeezing lightly. You squeezed back.

‘It’s okay Loki.’ You reply stepping back to look at his face.

‘Come on, let get to the kitchen before Clint eats it all’ You smile, pulling away completely to take Loki’s hand a walking him in the direction of the kitchen.

*Loki’s POV*

‘It was hurt myself of kill myself’

The comment ran though Loki’s head as he let Y/N drag him to the dinner table. The thought of Y/N not being here burned a hole in his chest like a hot coal. But she was right. There was no reason to get emotional over the past.

She was still here, 5 year after her battle with herself. She was still here and she was happy and holding his hand. She’d battled herself and won. And Loki would be proud of her for that for the rest of his existence.

[tessatales]

Drunks and pizza, what could go wrong?

Request: Can I request #14 with Clint Barton x reader where he’s been trying to ask her out?

Prompt: “would you like to order some pizza and get really drunk with me?"

‘Come on (Y/N), one more round’ Clint said; bouncing rings round you like a child before raising his gloved hands up towards his face in a protective stance.

“As much as I’d love to beat your ass again Barton I’m done. I can practically hear my bed calling to me” You reply, sliding past the now disappointed archer to grab your bottle, taking a long needed drink.

“(Y/N) the night is young! Don’t be a spoil sport” Clint whined, putting on his ‘moody teenager’ voice that always managed to make you grin. You bumped your hip against his side playfully and he took the opportunity to put his arm around your neck; heat prickling where your skin made contact with his.

It had been just over a year since you’d moved into the tower. A somewhat simple SHIELD mission had left you with a target on your back and had left Fury no choice but to put you under the Avengers protection. While the price was on your head you had only two rules to live by in the tower; don’t talk to Tony until you know he’s had his morning coffee (this rule was told to you by Bruce and from his tone you decided to take it as gospel) and never leave the tower alone.

Clint had volunteered to be your chaperone when leaving the tower and with you refusing to stop your daily activities because you ruined some supervillans plans you and Clint had become quite close from your many outings. Without you realising, you’d started to caught feelings for the archer. Not wanting to complicate the friendship at the time though, you’d kept it to yourself.

That was over six months ago; back when you thought you’d be going back to your crumby apartment and not becoming a permanent member of the Avengers team. Now you did your best to hide the raising heat in your cheeks with a playful punch to his chest.

“I’m taking a shower then I’m gonna kick back with a drink and a movie. You can stay here if you like” you said, shimmying out of Clint’s loose grasp before walking towards the training room exit.

“(Y/N) wait!” Clint shouts, jogging up to meet you at the gyms double doors.

“Yeah?” You ask, confused to the sudden conflict evident in your friends eyes. He cleared his throat, bringing his hand up to rub his neck as he spoke.

“Listen (Y/N), I was wondering maybe-”

‘Miss (Y/L/N) Mr Barton, you’re needed in the lounge area. Mr Stark and Miss Romanoff have found the Wii remotes again’ JARVIS said with some strain, as if the AI was gritting his non existence teeth. You and Clint groan in unison before hurrying to the lounge.

Since you’d moved in, you’d created an unlikely bond with Tony. It all starting when you brought him coffee to his lab one morning (that particular morning you found him sleeping standing up, leaning over dummy for support) and with this friendship came the job of ref. Nat and Tony had an unhealthy obsession of competing with each other; so much so that you’d resorted to hiding the Wii remotes after they spent two days trying to beat each others score (and nearly physically beating each other in the process) and with Clint and Nat being as close as siblings, the team had left it to you two to deal with their little spats.

Rounding the corner together, you both nearly skidded into Steve, who seemed to be tiptoeing away from the lounge as if a dangerous predator hid inside.

“How bad is it?” Clint asked hands on his hips.

“It bad; Nat found the Russian Vodka Bucky had stashed” you felt your stomach drop, drunk Nat and Tony were ten time worse than the usual pair.

“Thanks Steve, wish us luck” you said, striding towards the door with Clint not far behind. Before reaching the doors, Clint stopped you, his hand lightly encircled your wrist causing you to shiver.

“Hey, after would you like to order some pizza and get drunk with me?” There was a loud clang and a muffled yelp from the other side of the doors, You glance at the door before replying.

“ Sure, I think we’re gonna need it after this anyway”

“Tonyyyyy, give me the b-bottle before I drop you on your asss” Natasha slurred, swiping drunkenly at Tony, who had one of his suit hands aimed at Nat’s head while his real hands cradled the vodka bottle and both Wii remotes.

“No! If I give it back you’ll steal the remotes and beat me again!” Tony whined. You glanced at Clint giving him a small not before moving into action.

“Come on you two, time for bed!” You chimed, coming further into the room while Clint guarded the only exit (they had a tendency to run off when drunk)

“(Y/N)! You’re here!” Tony hiccuped, throwing his hands up and nearly hitting himself with the vodka bottle. The momentary distraction giving Nat time to swipe the bottle from his grip.

“Hello Tony, I think you two should give me the bottle and we can see to getting you to bed yeah” you say, stretching your hand out to where Natasha sat causing the drunk assassin to clutch the bottle closer to her chest.

“Hey-hey! Here’s a better idea! Let’s play Truth or dare!” Natasha squealed

“No no, you guys are going to bed” Clint chimes in, moving from the doors to Nat’s blind spot and swiping the bottle.

“But come on Clint! (Y/N)! Just one truth and one dare and we promise to go straight to bed” Tony pleaded; going to salute and catching himself in the eye. You give a heavy sigh before looking to Clint who shrugged as if to say 'what could go wrong?’

“Fine! But only one each then bed!” You order, pointing your finger accusingly at the two drunk avengers. After they agreed with varied amounts of enthusiasm you and Clint sat down on the floor; careful not to sit on the take out meal Tony and Natasha must of ordered.

“Right who’s going first?” Clint asked, his voice bored.

“I dare you Clint!” Natasha practically screamed, dramatically pointing at him as if he was in a 'who done it’ scenario

“And my dare is..?” Clint asked, his face contorting into a expectant frown. The two seemed to deliberate for a moment before speaking, giggling as they revealed Clint’s verdict

“We dare you to kiss (Y/N)!”

All colour left your face in a nanosecond, your hands suddenly becoming clammy as you stared between the drunk pair and your long term crush.

“Uh..” Clint stammered, his hand jumping up to rub his neck.

“Y-you don’t have to, guys give him another dar-” You were cut off as a hand came up to cup your face and a pair of soft lips crashed into yours.

This kiss was soft, delicate yet full of barely restrained need, your lips moving together in perfect sync. All to soon the kiss ended and you were left breathless as he pulled away, his face seeming as flushed as yours was.

“And now (Y/N)! You get truth” Tony’s words broke you from your daze, reality suddenly coming down on you with the full force of a planet. You willed you’re voice to remain normal as you spoke;

“Hit me with your best shot” you said, your eyes never leaving Clint’s

“Do you have feeling for our bashful Hawkeye over here?” Natasha hiccuped then giggled. Without any real thought you spoke; your heart leading before your mind had chance to compute the question.

“Yes”

“I knew it! Told you Tony! You owe me ten bucks!” Natasha exclaimed, all drowsiness leaving her immediately. It took you a moment to realised what was going on.

“Hey you set us up!” You seethed, anger bubbling up as you realised you’d been tricked.

“Well you weren’t going to tell each other any other way” Tony commented, picking up a pizza take out menu and dropping it in Clint’s lap before sauntering towards the exit, Nat not far behind.

“Now talk to each other damn it” Nat said as she walked out the door; you both looked confused and dazed all at once and you knew that pizza and getting drunk was definitely the way to go; it seemed they had a hell of a lot to talk about.

A/N: hey! This is my first fic/prompt so it may be terrible. I don’t like how I ended it but it was the only way I could go. Overall I think I did okay ish? Don’t hesitate to request something and I do all character (no smut tho, sorry) hope you enjoyed!

Requested by: @purplekitten30