#ladies be really careful about posting pictures of yourselves online
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maslows-pyramid-scheme · 11 months ago
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There's a marketplace for deepfakes in online forums. People post requests for videos to be made of their wives, neighbours and co-workers and - unfathomable as it might seem - even their mothers, daughters and cousins. Content creators respond with step-by-step instructions - what source material they'll need, advice on which filming angles work best, and price tags for the work. A deepfake content creator based in south-east England, Gorkem, spoke to the BBC anonymously. He began creating celebrity deepfakes for his own gratification - he says they allow people to "realise their fantasies in ways that really wasn't [sic] possible before." Later, Gorkem moved on to deepfaking women he was attracted to, including colleagues at his day job who he barely knew. "One was married, the other in a relationship," he says. "Walking into work after having deepfaked these women - it did feel odd, but I just controlled my nerves. I can act like nothing's wrong - no-one would suspect." Realising he could make money from what he refers to as his "hobby", Gorkem started taking commissions for custom deepfakes. Gathering footage from women's social media profiles provides him with plenty of source material. He says he even recently deepfaked a woman using a Zoom call recording. "With a good amount of video, looking straight at the camera, that's good data for me. Then the algorithm can just extrapolate from that and make a good reconstruction of the face on the destination video." He accepts "some women" could be psychologically harmed by being deepfaked, but seems indifferent about the potential impact of the way he is objectifying them. "They can just say, 'It's not me - this has been faked.' They should just recognise that and get on with their day. "From a moral standpoint I don't think there's anything that would stop me," he says. "If I'm going to make money from a commission I would do it, it's a no brainer ... [but] if I could be traced online I would stop there and probably find another hobby."
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not-magdi · 1 year ago
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Little Update
Summary: Lando gives his fans a little update about live
Words: 785
Warnings: None just pure fluff
A/N
It's my first time writing for Lando I hope you like it <3
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Three weeks ago, you and Lando welcomed a little baby boy to the world. The both of you were pretty open about the pregnancy, posting pictures and stories all the time.
The fans loved watching your baby bump grow. And the interactions between Lando and the baby you two shared over your socials.
But since the baby was born, you two went MIA for a while and haven't posted a thing. Everybody started to speculate that the baby was born, but nobody had seen the baby yet.
You and Lando needed some time for yourselves to adjust to the new situation, but after some time, you slowly got into a routine.
Now, the two of you wanted to let the world know about your little bundle of joy. Lando wanted to do something special, that would resemble you and him.
Something that made you and Lando who you are, are your infamous streams. So Lando wanted to stream with your baby and introduce him to the world. You were a bit sceptical at first, not wanting to parade around with your baby in public so much.
But Lando assured you that everything would be alright and that he would be extra careful if it would get too much for little baby Henry.
So now Lando was sitting in his gaming chair with his son sound asleep next to him in his crib.
You wanted to stay with them and watch, but you had a hard time staying awake and chose to take a nap, still recovering from labour.
Lando took a deep breath and started the stream but had the camera still turned off. In the next few minutes, thousands of people joined his stream.
Seeing the numbers rise made Lando's heart beat faster, and he started overthinking his idea again. Nevertheless, he turned on his microphone and greeted his viewers.
"Hey, guys! … Guys, calm down. I know the camera's turned off. Be patient."
His heart melted as he read the messages his fans sent him, asking how he was doing and if you were doing okay. After laughing at a few messages, his heart rate slowed down and he started to feel more relaxed.
"So guys, I know me and Y/N haven't been online for some time. In our defence, we had a good reason."
Taking a deep breath to collect himself, he took the sleeping baby into his arms and turned on the camera.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to introduce you to Henry Norris."
He grabbed Henry's little hand with his finger and waved at the camera. The chat went completely feral at that, congratulating the two of them on your little family.
Henry slowly woke up after he felt his dad's presence. Looking up at Lando with his big blue eyes, which he got from you, he cuddled himself deeper into Lando's arms.
Realising that his son had woken up, he cooed at him and kissed his little forehead to settle him again.
"Chat, look at him, he's so cute. Baby, you wanna say hello?"
Hearing Lando use his baby voice and cuddle with his son made the chat go crazy. Messages of love and adoration flooded the chat.
"How is Y/N doing?" Lando read out loud.
"Y/N's doing quite good. She is currently sleeping. I try to help her as much as I can. She needs to recover fast because I'm kind of lost without her."
Chuckling at the end of his sentence, he read a few more questions until he heard the door to his office open and close.
"Aww, chat, look who decided to join us!"
You waved at the camera as you took your place behind Lando, kissing his messy curls.
"The chat kept asking for you," Lando mumbled into your neck as he nuzzled himself into you.
"Aww, really? Hi chat!"
You greet the chat and cuddle yourself next to Lando. The two of you kept answering questions until you felt Henry squirm in Lando's arms.
"Chat, we're going to end the stream now. Little muppet's gonna have his dinner now."
Taking Henry from Lando's arms, you head out, getting ready to feed him. Lando comes right after you, talking to the chat for a bit.
The sight that greets him in the living room, is a sight he could never get sick of.
The love of his life, with his son in her arms, feeding him in their own little home.
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thesoftdumbass · 7 years ago
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Beware the Creeper
A Star Trek AOS fanfiction
Supernatural AU
Posted: October 31st, 2017
Words: 6K (because I can be a wordy hoe)
Pairings: Reader x Leonard McCoy, Nyota Uhura x Jim Kirk
Summary: You and Nyota are ghost hunters that get trapped inside a haunted hospital with supernaturalists Jim and Leonard. How will you get out of this situation?
Warnings: ghosts, weapons, abandoned sanatorium, mentions of death and disease, brief mention of suicide, brief mention of experimental surgery, brief mentions of torture, being trapped, un-edited
Pre-A/N: This fic is based off of a real place called Waverly Hills Sanatorium in my home state of Kentucky. I have never been but I’ve done some research and I hope this isn’t too off-base. I hope this gives good spoopy vibes. Enjoy!
-Tay
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(This moodboard was made with pictures from pinterest)
You pulled up the long drive leading to the entrance to the hospital around dusk. Glancing over to Nyota, she smiles at your apprehensive expression.
"Are you sure we have to take this case? The kid wasn't hurt, he just got scared," you ask her.
"Yes, YN. A teenage boy saw an apparition, and when he tried to flee, couldn't get the door to open. He was stuck on the fourth floor for two hours before he was able to leave."
You mumbled under your breath something about nosy kids having to break into haunted buildings to get their kicks, while Nyota got out of the car and opened the trunk, grabbing her duffel bag.
"How about once we finish here, we can take a small break from cases and relax. Sound good?"
You vacate the driver's seat and join her behind the car, grabbing your own gear. "I guess, Ny. This place just gives me the creeps. Give me a ravenous vampire or a wendigo any day, but a haunted hospital?" You give a slight shudder at that. "I am not a fan of this."
"I know hospitals weird you out, just give it a night at least. If we don't find anything here, we move on," your best friend told you, placating.
"Okay, okay. There's not anybody here, right?"
"They closed their overnight tours for the season, we should be alone."
"Then let's go," you said, your voice laced with faux enthusiasm.
The two of you walked to the front of the building and opened the main entrance, the padlock already having been busted. You walked in, your heavy-duty flashlight illuminating the way, Nyota by your side.
Looking around the dilapidated first story, you suppress another shudder. The building seems empty except for plaster falling from the walls and dead leaves and debris coming in through broken windows. You give a sigh and follow Uhura's lead down the hallway.
Neither of you notice the van pulling up in front of the abandoned sanatorium, and you also don't notice two bickering men entering the building loaded down with camera equipment. It's only when they come within earshot and Nyota's head pops up from around a corner that you notice anything off.
"Do you hear that, YN," Ny inquires in a hushed tone.
"Yeah," you trail off, listening. "Are there people here? That doesn't sound like an apparition." Nyota pulled you into a patient room while two men walked closer and their words became clear.
"And why do we have to spend our time here?" The man with dark hair said, and his companion gave him a playful glare as you spied from behind a door. "All I'm sayin' is, we could be somewhere else. There's a place just a few miles away that's famous for their mint juleps. I read about it online."
"C'mon Bones, this is our job. We investigate creepy, haunted places, and we do it on camera. Waverly Hills is said to be one of the most haunted places in America. We can't pass up this opportunity!" the tall blond exclaimed.
Before they could pass you up altogether, you stepped into their path with your shotgun raised, Uhura behind you doing the same. The blond man yelped and dropped his pack while 'Bones' just muttered curses under his breath, raising his hands in defense.
"It's obvious y'all aren't cops, so who are you," you question them.
The pretty blond with electric blue eyes steps forward, his hands also raised. "My name is James T. Kirk and this," gesturing to the handsome brunet with hazel eyes, "is Leonard McCoy. We're supernaturalists, we travel the country recording ourselves in haunted locations. We're just here to film."
Nyota stands up from where she was kneeled checking the dropped bag. "That checks out. They just have camera equipment and snacks in the bag."
Giving them a look that simply said 'really,' the blond dropped his hands and whined defensively, "I get low blood sugar."
You rolled your eyes and lowered your shotgun that was filled with rock salt, and turned around to retrieve your duffel bag from where you left it in the other room. You returned to find Nyota standing in front of James and Leonard with her arms crossed.
"I'm sure you can find the way out," Ny says, practically shooing them away.
"Wait wait," Leonard as you learned, butt in. "Now you know why we're here, but why are you two lurkin' around here all by yourselves?"
You snort attractively. "That's not your concern, and don't you worry about us being alone, we can handle ourselves."
"Not to piss off the people with shotguns, but we're staying. We came here to do a job and we're not leaving until it's done," blue eyes stands his ground.
"Listen James, we have a job to do. So find your way out, or we'll show you out," Nyota said calmly but with a quiet authority in her tone. James and Leonard grabbed their belongings and turned around, heading in the direction of the exit.
You waited a few moments before you spoke again. "So now that those bozos are gone, ready to get started?" Ny agreed and you both headed towards the fourth floor, starting to search for cold spots.
Meanwhile, the supernaturalists were sneaking their way through the hospital, filming.
"My name is Jim Kirk and I'm coming to you from Waverly Hills Sanatorium in Louisville, Kentucky. This building opened it's doors as a tuberculosis hospital in 1910, and later renovated in 1926 to accommodate more patients. Over the years, thousands of men, women, and children spent time in this hospital for treatment. Many patients died from the disease itself, but many were subjected to bizarre and barbaric experimental treatments. Waverly Hills closed in 1961 only to be re-opened as a geriatric sanatorium a year later, where horrible conditions and mistreatment led to many more fatalities, and was shut down by the state. With such a tragic history, it is not surprising how much paranormal activity and strange happenings take place here. We're here communicate with some of these spirits, and try to help them find their way to their final resting place. Come with us as we explore this border between worlds."
With the beginning monologue for their episode recorded, Leonard stepped out from behind the camera. "You sure like to hear yourself talk, don't you?"
"Don't be mean, Bones. The viewers needed some backstory."
Bones let out an unconvinced "uh-huh" and picked up his tripod, folding it up. "Where to next?"
"I think we should go to the upper levels, there have been a few suicides in room 502, so we can start there."
When they were passing by the fourth floor, though, Leonard noticed that the door was left cracked, where it was supposed to be closed and locked. Putting up a hand to stop his friend from passing, Len crept closer to the door and pushed it open a little more. Before he could turn back around, Jim pushed past him and went bounding into the main hallway of level four.
"We've gotta check this out," Jim yelped happily.
Bones let out a loud shushing noise and followed cautiously after his friend, trying to prevent him from doing something stupid.
"Jim, those women are still here somewhere, and I don't want another shotgun barrel shoved in my face."
"Relax, Bones, I'll be careful," Jim says right before he trips over a section of the floor that had fallen in, hollering and catching himself last minute against the wall right beside him. Turning back around, he faced his friend with a sheepish smile. "That was an accident."
"You are such an infant sometimes," Bones grumbled as hecautiousl made his way into the same hallway as Jim, leaving the door to the stairwell open behind him.
"Did you hear that," you question Nyota as you're both inspecting the fourth story. She shrugs and keeps watching her EMF meter. "I'll be back," you say distractedly, already cocking the shotgun in your hands. You make your way out of the patient room you were in and cautiously turn the corner into the hallway, your face dropping into a sneer when you saw the source of the noise.
Standing before you were the two men you and Ny had sent away earlier, Leonard and James. "Are you freaking kidding me," you say with a clenched jaw.
"Nice to see you again," the blond smirks.
"I thought we told you to leave."
"And I thought we told you that we weren't leaving until we did what we came to do," he bit back.
You roll your eyes and turn away from the nuisances, making your way back to Uhura. Walking across the uneven floor, you hear more than feel, the two following in your footsteps, literally. You decide to leave it alone for now, preventing yourself from making rash decisions.
As you walk back into the large patient room, Nyota looks up from her task. "Did you find out what the noise was?"
You just walk to the side of the door, letting your two shadows make their way into the open space beside you. "We have company," your voice monotone.
Her almond eyes narrow on the men in question before looking to you. "I thought they left."
"Me too. I guess they just sneaked around the first floor before coming up the stairs."
You both turned to look at them. "Listen you two, I don't care what you do. You could dress in drag and do the hula, as long as you do it somewhere else. Have I made myself clear," Uhura sassed at them, and you gave them a smug smile.
"Ladies, I'm sure we can work something out. We can both just work around each other, we don't even have to be on the same floor," the one named Leonard said.
You and Ny have a silent conversation, coming to a decision. "Fine," she speaks out loud after a moment. "as long as you two promise to keep clear of the fourth floor, we guess you can stay." James pumps his fist in the air, and Leonard grins. "We'll walk you to the stairs to make sure you actually leave this time."
"Done! Deal," blue eyes replies readily.
"Lead the way," you gesture for them to walk in front of you.
As the four of you are walking through the cluttered hallway, James breaks the silence. "Y'know, I never caught your name," he flirts with Nyota.
"And you're not going to," she replies confidently. He keeps speaking, shameless.
"Well my name is James, but you can call me Jim. Or you could just call me." Jim's buddy rolls his eyes and you snicker at the glare on your friend's face. You reach the door that leads to the stairwell and stop, not resisting the smirk on your face as you bid them good luck in the ridiculously haunted abandoned sanatorium.
Jim pulled on the door to the stairwell, but it wouldn't budge. "What the- it won't open!"
"Let me try." All four of you attempted to open the door with increasing intensity. The door may have been heavy, but the problem was more than that.
"Guys, stop. Its obviously not going to open for us. There must be somebody keeping us inside."
"Somebody?" Leonard spoke.
"Something," you clarified. "We should go back to the room, we can try to come up with a plan to get out."
Once you're back in the patient treatment room, Leonard pulled his phone from his pocket and frowned down at it. "I don't have any service to call for help."
"Of course not. Whatever is keeping us in here obviously don't want us to leave." Nyota said, then turned to you. "YN, can you find us a way out of here?"
"I can try," you said with little confidence. You bent over and picked up your duffel bag, placing it on one of the beds to dig through it. You pulled out a map of the building and started to examine it by flashlight. "There are porches on every level for the patients to get fresh air, but we're up four flights of stairs. We could be hurt, or worse, if we land wrong. If we could get to the first floor, there's a tunnel that leads outside the grounds, they used to bring supplies in through it during winter, and also transport bodies out so the other patients wouldn't see."
You continue to study the map silently, trying to find some way out of the building. The others in your little group started thinking of other ways out. Nyota noticed that Jim was being uncharacteristically quiet, even for having just met him. "You okay," she asks, bumping his shoulder with hers.
"I'm fine, its just... I've never been in a situation like this before. The most paranormal activity I've witnessed has been benevolent spirits, they weren't trying to hurt me. I guess I just don't know what to do."
"Well, me and YN have been in plenty of situations like this before, and we've always found a way out. Have trust."
"How can I trust you if I don't even know your name," Jim said playfully, bumping her shoulder back.
"Uhura." At Jim's confused expression, she spoke again. "My name, it's Uhura."
"What, they don't have last names where you're from?"
"Uhura is my last name."
"What, they don't have first names where you're from?"
"Not one that you'll hear," and that was the end if that conversation, for now.
"GUYS!" you exclaim. Uhura and Jim shift their attention to you, and Leonard looks up from checking the footage from his body cam.
"Did you find anything," he asks.
"I think I did! There's a fire escape on this floor, it leads to a set of stairs outside the building. It might be closed, though. I've never known a vengeful spirit to overlook something like this, but its worth a try. There's also a kitchen on this level, we can look for salt there. I didn't bring any in my bag."
"Why do we need salt? And what is a vengeful spirit,” Jim asks, perplexed.
"They are usually ghosts that have been done wrong, usually by the way they died. They remain after death and try to right the wrong done to them. They act violently to try and avenge the wrong, but their obsession often leads them to hurting innocent people," Nyota explains.
"Okay, so how do we stop it," questions Jim.
"The best way is to burn the body. Cover it in salt and lighter fluid and light it up. Salt also keeps ghosts away. You can put it in the windows and doors or stand in a circle of it so they can't touch you. Eventually it can get blown away with the wind, but salt works in a pinch." You snorted at your inadvertent joke.
"How do y'all know so much about this stuff," Leonard asks incredulously with a southern accent that you failed to notice earlier.
Uhura sighed before informing them. "I am a hunter. So is YN. We kill monsters and supernatural creatures that hurt human beings. That's why we're here tonight, a teenage boy saw an apparition, and was trapped on this floor for two hours. Apparently, whatever did that doesn't like letting people leave."
"You hunt ghosts?" When Uhura nodded in answer to Jim's question, his jaw went slack. "That is so hot!" A perfectly manicured eyebrow raises. "And I mean that in the most respectful of ways." Uhura rolled her eyes.
"We should split into two groups. One can check the fire escape to see if it's open, and the other can search the kitchenette and dining area for salt." Jim and Nyota nod in agreement, but Leonard has some concerns.
"Haven't you ever seen a scary movie? That's how people get killed!"
"Lighten up, Bones. It'll be faster this way. The quicker we do this, the quicker we can go get those mint juleps you wouldn't shut up about," Jim says with an eyebrow wiggle.
Leonard's eyebrow quirks up in interest, but he still doesn't look convinced. "That's alright, Len. I'll protect you from the big bad ghost," you coo sarcastically, picking up your shotgun for safety. He rolls his eyes but comes when you beckon him closer with your fingers, handing him your flashlight. "I'll check the kitchen. You guys got the fire exit?"
"Yeah, you go on," Ny tells you.
"Try not to make out in the middle of the hallway," you call over your shoulder as you leave, not missing Uhura give you the finger, both you and Len laughing on your way out.
You make your way into the hallway with Leonard by your side, your shoulders brushing every few steps. You decide that if you're going to be trapped in a building with this guy, you should at least get to know him a little better. "So Bones, huh?"
He chuckled. "It's a nickname Jim gave me in college. It's a long story."
"All right then," you say and continue to walk in silence.
"So YN, what happens if we can't get out the fire escape?”
"A ghost's presence is stronger at night, along with the energy they can manipulate. If we can't find an exit, we're likely stuck here until dawn."
"Who do you think is keeping us here," Leonard asks.
"Well I highly doubt it's Timmy the ghost boy," you joke. "There have been a lot of deaths here over the years, a lot of creepy happenings. A lot of gorey experimental surgeries were performed back in the day, trying to treat the tuberculosis, and a lot of the patients suffered painful deaths. The boy that got trapped on this floor saw an apparition of a man in a white cloak that we think was a doctor. Honestly though, it could be any number of spirits left behind."
You were finally in the kitchenette, so you sat your shotgun down on the unsteady table and started rifling through drawers while Bones opened cabinets and searched. There wasn't much to be desired about the small room, the wallpaper peeling in some places, and sections of drywall completely missing in others. The whole kitchen was destroyed, making it hard to walk safely through it. You didn't find any table salt there, so you asked your companion.
"Anything?"
"Nope. You?"
"Nothing. Maybe we should check the dining room and the pantry," you suggest.
The two of you stay together, walking side by side as you find the pantry. There is a carton of salt there and you grab it, letting out a small excited noise.
Leonard lets out an amused huff before grabbing your hand, "Let's go tell them the good news, hopefully they have some for us."
"Okay. Oh, wait! I left my gun in the kitchen."
You and Leonard head back into the kitchen but you pause in your footsteps when you take a deep breath. "Is that... Do you smell something baking?"
"It smells like freshly baked bread," Len contributes after inhaling deeply.
You cautiously step forward to grab your weapon, feeling Bones right behind you. After picking it up, you start to turn around but freeze where you stand. Before you is a transparent figure, clad in a lab coat. Before you can even take a brreath, the apparition is turning his back to you and walking into the dining room. It disappears into thin air and you let out the breath you hadn't realised you were holding.
"So, that happened..." you say awkwardly a few minutes later, after realizing you were standing in silence. You turn to Leonard when he fails to say anything, giving him an inquisitive look. He is still staring at the space that the doctor disappeared into with his mouth gaping. It looks like he's having a panic attack, breathing shallow, so you place your hand on his. "Hey, are you okay?"
Leonard opens and closes his mouth several times but he doesn't make a sound. "Let's get you back to the room, okay?" When he nods, you steer him by the shoulders towards the hallway, in the opposite direction than the spirit headed.
You are almost back to the room when you hear a shot being fired. "Ny?!"
"Jim!" Bones comes to his senses enough to start off in a sprint before you pull him back by the arm, keeping him by your side. You raise your gun and cock it, ducking into rooms one by one and making sure you weren't taken by surprise. It feels like forever but it only takes minutes for you to arrive at your destination. You run into the patient room and see Nyota and Jim standing there, NY still had her gun raised.
"Try not to make out in the middle of the hallway!"
Jim raised an eyebrow at YN's comment and a laugh slipped past his full lips. Nyota rolls her head in his direction, an unamused expression lining her features.
"What? I thought that was funny."
Nyota rolled her eyes for what felt like the hundredth time that night. "Let's go," she grabs her own flashlight and weapon, walking to the door and not looking back to see if Jim was following her. Kirk adjusted the small camera fixated on his jacket and followed a few steps behind her.
"So if they can't find the salt, what do we do then," Jim asked, catching up to Nyota. "I mean, this place closed down thirty-five years ago and they're not exactly holding dinner parties here."
"If it comes down to it, we can empty our shotgun shells. They're filled with rock salt to make the spirits dissipate. It's not permanent, but it keeps them away for a little while."
A look of awe passed over Jim's face before a large grin took over. Nyota suppressed a smirk at having impressed him, and continued walking.
"So you said you're supernaturalists, how did you start all this," Uhura gestures vaguely, trying to start a conversation.
"When I was a little boy, my house was haunted. Me and my brother Sam would try to communicate with the spirit. It wasn't malevolent or anything, he was in the Navy in his youth, Captain Pike. He just seemed lost and in pain, and I promised myself that one day I would help other spirits like him move on to the next life instead of being stuck in-between worlds. I've spent my whole life studying paranormal entities, and I love what I do." It was silent except for the sound of their footsteps, and Jim asked a question he had been wondering. "How did you become a hunter?"
"When I was fifteen, a vampire killed my parents right in front of me, drained their blood slowly. If Jody hadn't showed up and killed the vampire, I would have been next. She took me in and raised me as a hunter."
"I'm sorry about that," Jim said softly.
"Don't be, it's in the past."
They arrived at the end of the extensive hallway and located the fire exit. Jim immediately reached for the handle, pulling with all of his strength, to no fruition.
"Bila shaka hatuwezi kuondoka," Uhura muttered to herself. "I knew it wouldn't be that easy, whatever is keeping us here wouldn't overlook this."
"What now?"
"Now we go back to the treatment room and hope Leonard and YN found salt so we can last until morning when we can get out." They start the treacherous walk back to their home base.
"I am so glad that we didn't get stuck here alone, you guys really know what you're doing," Jim admits.
"Lucky for you, because you two wouldn't last the night by yourselves."
James opens his mouth to defend himself and his best friend when he catches Uhura's smirk in his peripherals, sporting a small grin himself. "Good one."
"Thank you," Ny says proudly but her steps hesitate. Jim notices and gives her a concerned look.
"Are you all right?"
Nyota turns her head, evaluating their surroundings. "I'm fine, but we're not alone,' she says slowly.
Jim's back stiffens and he turns around in a quick circle, looking for their company. When he doesn't notice anything imediately off, he faces back around to Uhura. "There's a shadow-figure behind us, watching from the doorway to the nurse's station," she says quietly.
Jim pivots and looks toward the place in question, he squints his eyes and sees what Ny is talking about. There is a dark silhouette, shaped distinctly like a man, tall and thin. Uhura calls Kirk's name and captures his attention. "We should go back to room 423," she said, and they started walking again, the only sounds heard were their quiet breathing and footsteps crunching on the littered floorboards.
They make it back to the room and walk inside, immediately going to Nyota's duffel bag. While she is taking out her EMF reader and turning it on, Jim gets an uneasy feeling. His head starts to swivel, checking all around them before stopping in the corner of the large room.
"Uhura!" Jim yells in surprise, extending a hand and pointing his finger. Uhura stands up from her seat on a patient bed and turns to face the corner that Jim brought attention to. There stands another shadow, this time a woman in a patient gown, facing away from them.
Jim and Nyota watch as the shadow turns to face them, her features blurred. The woman starts inching towards them, mumbling repeatedly. As she gets closer, her words become clear. "Get out," the detached voice croaks out.
Nyota grabs her gun, cocking it and letting out a shot when the woman is only inches away, sending salt into the apparition. She immediately dissipated, her energy going elsewhere. "Believe me, we're trying," Ny says deadpan.
Shouts are heard from down the hallway, and when Leonard and YN return to room 423, they are out of breath.
"Nyota, are you all right?"
"What happened in here?"
Both YN and Leonard ask at the same time. After Nyota and Jim tell their story and the bad news about the fire escape, the other half of their group do the same along with the good news about the discovery of salt.
"I don't get why this thing would tell us to get out if it's keeping us here in the first place," Bones questions. By now it is past two in the morning and you've all been trapped on the fourth floor for hours, growing more tired of this place by the second.
"What if something else is keeping us here? You said the doctor didn't act aggressively, and the teen that was also trapped here was only scared by the apparition he saw, and couldnt get out when he tried to run. What if it is a completely separate entity locking the doors?" Nyota hypothesizes.
"Yeah, but what? We haven't done anything wrong to any of these spirits," Jim points out.
"It doesn't matter," you speak up. "Vengeful spirits may start out trying to get retribution, but that fixation can drive them crazy, making them forget their purpose, even who they were when they were living. Given enough time, the spirit could turn on a loved one without even knowing or caring if they are innocent or not." Then you add under your breath, "I should know."
Len hears your quiet confession though and asks while Ny and Jim venture into their own conversation. "What do you mean 'you should know'" he asks softly.
You sigh sadly before starting to tell your story. "I was little girl when my best friend died in a car accident. We were really close, and we lived right beside each other. When I started seeing her around both our houses I just thought she was coming to keep me company. I would still tell her everything, and she would listen. I guess as I grew up, I started living my life as I was supposed to, and she was angry that she never got to. I started to notice that, even though it had been almost eight years since her death, Janice wasn't the same as she used to be. Whenever I told her something new that happened to me that week, she would get angry and things would start flying. She wasn't the same girl that I used to know, and I knew it. I stopped talking to her and eventually she stopped visiting me. When I graduated high school I wanted to know more, so I started digging, and found out a lot of information about things that I didn't even know exist. I started hunting and I haven't looked back since, I just hope Janice found her peace."
After you're finished, Leonard looks at you with sad eyes. "I'm sorry, YN." You wave away his concerns and plaster on a smile. You busy yourself with looking through your duffel bag to avoid awkward conversation, instead pulling out your tire iron. Len looks at you curiously and you answer his un-asked question. "Iron, it also keeps away ghosts. Just swing it at their body and they should leave for a few minutes."
Bones raised his eyebrows and replied with a simple "Gotcha."
You straightened up when you heard what sounded like a scream coming from the corridor. "Guys?"
"We heard it," Jim spoke.
"It was only a matter of time before something else came at us. Should we go see who it is this time," Uhura asked rhetorically. You picked up the tire iron that you had previously sat on the bed beside you, handing it to Leonard and standing up, grabbing and loading your gun.
"Let's go then."
Nyota follows your actions and places another iron in Jim's hand and followed you into the hall. You follow the sounds to one end of the building and end up on the other end of the building, in the surgery wing. The wails were getting louder and more frequent, high pitched almost like a child shrieking in pain.
The screams were the loudest when you reached the minor surgery room, forcing you to cover your ears. As soon as all four of you are inside the room, the wails stop and the door slams shut. Kirk's eyes widen and he bites his lip. "I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that wasn't the wind."
"Nope," you say, popping the last sylabil.
"Great, now we're stuck in an even smaller space. Just what my claustrophobia needed," Len's grumbles reach your ears, making you smile genuinely this time.
A beam of light shines beside you, startling you. "Sorry," Ny apologizes but you also pull out your flashlight.
You walk in circles around the room while the others look around, blatantly avoiding the operating table in the center of the room. It was on one of these passes that you see it. You were sweeping your light across the ceiling, inspecting the cobwebs when your eyes move past. You do a double take and almost fall over in shock.
"What the..." you whisper, not able to find your voice.
"What?" NY asks, following your line of sight to where the creature currently was on the ceiling.
You walk backwards, bumping into Leonard who was behind you. He puts his hand on your waist to keep you steady while you recall something you had read in an article online. "The creeper."
"The creeper? I thought that thing left in the 60s!” Jim gasped as everybody's eyes followed the shadow crawling across the ceiling.
The creeper was on all fours, moving in an animalistic manner, coming to a rest above the operating table.
You were the first to take action, shooting a salt round into it, making it disappear. "So I'm guessing that's what's trapping us here."
"I'm guessing you're right," Nyota walks to your side, examining the spot that the 'thing' was just moments ago.
"Am I the only one here that doesn't know what the heck "the creeper" is?" Bones makes air quotes with his fingers.
"The creeper is a manifestation of energy that first appeared in 1967. According to eyewitness accounts, it materialized to protect a young boy that was being subjected to electroshock therapy, protecting him when the machine was set too high, almost killing the boy," you supply.
"It stayed behind after they stopped the shocks, protecting the boy from bullies in the facility and supposedly left when Shadow Eyes did. I don't know why it's back though," Jim added.
Uhura sent it away again with a spray of rock salt. "I've read reports that its been seen around the sanatorium, but it didn't do anything like this."
"So it's unpredictable. Awesome. How do we get out of here," Len asks.
"I have an idea, but I can't guarantee any positive results. It could just piss it off."
"Do whatever you have to," Kirk voices what everybody is thinking and you nod.
When the creeper shows up again just minutes later and stalking towards you more aggressively, you shout the first thing on your mind to keep it from hurting Nyota, who it was closest to.
"Shadow Eyes!" It pauses its movements but resumes just seconds later, so you try again. "We're not trying to hurt Shadow Eyes, or you. We know that you came here to protect Richard all those years ago, but now we're trapped here, just like he was."
The creeper stops moving and turns its attention fully to you. You continue to speak once you see this, still holding your weapon aloft just in case.
"Richard's parents had him brought here and he couldn't leave. He was here for three weeks and I can only imagine how that must have felt, but you don't have to protect him now. Shadow Eyes is safe. You were his guardian but he doesn't need you for that anymore. Please, just let us leave. If you let us leave and not hurt anyone else, we won't come back."
Your words have their effect and you watch as the darkness around the creature disappears, and reveals the spirit of a woman in a nurse's uniform. She gives you a grateful smile and speaks in a kind voice. "Thank you for reminding me of who I was." You nod in acknowledgement and see her leave one final time, disappearing into a cloud of white.
You are able to leave the operating room and gather your stuff from room 423, finally making your way down the stairs and outside while it is still dark. You load yours and Nyota's duffel bags into the trunk, then lean against your car, watching as Nyota and Jim say goodbye a few feet away. Leonard comes over to your side and copies your stance, crossing his arms over his chest.
"That was pretty impressive in there, you saved us all."
"That was nothing," you say humbly.
"Really, YN. I don't know what would have happened if you didn't remember all that stuff about Shadow Eyes," Len insists.
"Well, thank you," you reply, tucking a loose strand of hair behind you ear.
"Maybe tonight, after we've all had showers and some rest, we can meet up and have some of those mint juleps I've heard so much about," you suggest biting your lip and Leonard's eyes follow the movement.
"I'd like that darlin'," he replies.
"Good. I'll see you later, Bones," you give him a wink and a kiss to the corner of his mouth, sliding into the driver's seat as Ny opens the passenger side door.
"Bye Nyota,” Jim accentuates her first name, cheekily reminding her that he did learn it without her having to tell him. "Call me?"
"We'll see," she replies but by the smile on her face there is a real possibility of her doing so.
You exchange goodbyes for now and turn around in the long drive, seeing out of the corner of your eye, a shadow figure watching you leave from the fourth floor. You bid adieu to Waverly Hills Sanatorium, and leave the grounds, hopefully for good. With the creeper gone you know that future visitors will be safe, and that's all that you could hope for.
(”Bila shaka hatuwezi kuondoka” = “Of course we can’t leave” in Swahili)
In Beware the Creeper, the spirit behind the creeper was a nurse at Waverly Hills at the height of the tuberculosis epidemic, and contracted the disease herself. Her spirit stayed behind, looking over the patients still inhabiting the building. When a 12 year old boy Richard Rollins was put under ECT that was set too high, the spirit of the nurse turned into The Creeper to keep the doctors and nurses from hurting him more and followed Richard when he left the grounds, but returned years later
*
Post-A/N: Like I said, Waverly Hills is a real place with a long and tragic history. It was a tuberculosis treatment hospital at the height of the epidemic here in the US, and is now one of the most haunted locations in the country. If you want to know more about Waverly, Shadow Eyes, or The Creeper, there are more than a few articles online that I recommend you read. All of the haunted happenings that I described here have happened to real people, with the exception of the entire OR scene. I exaggerated some parts but others have been witnessed.
Some other things:
-I wanted Reader and Uhura to be BAMFs who kick butt and take names, I hope that comes across.
-Reader and Uhura are loosely based on Sam and Dean Winchester, and Jim and Leonard are (very) loosely based on the Ghostfacers, Ed and Harry.
-I am not the best with attention to detail, and I know it shines through in my fics. I sometimes leave details open and I am sorry, please disregard this about me.
-Did you catch all of the cameos/quotes/references to Star Trek in this? There are a few of them.
I procrastinated hard on this one, guys. I promise I will try harder on my fics for the Holidays, which I will try to start soon.
I think that’s all I have to say (though it is alot. Wordy hoe, remember?) Please consider leaving notes if you liked this and prove my sister wrong. Thank you all so much for reading, have a safe and happy Halloween, lovelies!
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10 Steps to Finding a Great Wedding Photographer
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In contrast to crafted by your other wedding merchants (music, blossom game plans, cake), photos aren't things you can hear, smell, taste or even observe from the outset—you don't generally have the foggiest idea what you're getting until sometime later. That implies cautious research and particularity with respect to proficient abilities, aesthetic style and individual manner are extra significant while picking your picture taker.
Stage 1: Settle on a Style
Before you start exploring picture takers, you'll have to initially choose what sort of photography style you like, as that will help figure out which sort of photographic artist you'll need shooting your wedding. Get propelled! Invest energy pouring over any sort of symbolism you love, from stylistic layout shots to a design blogger's Instagram feed. When you have a decent assortment of rousing photos, attempt to limit in on what attracts you to them explicitly and analyze what feels generally real to you and your accomplice. Perhaps that is formal-presented pictures, a great photography style or a way of life, photojournalistic feel. In the event that you love sharp and difference y shots, maybe a picture taker with an energy for the emotional is the correct decision for you. Recollect that you don't really need to limit in on one style specifically, since many wedding picture takers can do a mix of likeness and narrative style shots, a blend of highly contrasting and shading pictures, etc. Yet, on the off chance that there's an exceptional style you love, make a point to concentrate on picture takers who have some expertise in it.
Stage 2: Do Your Homework
Start your inquiry by perusing surveys from late love birds and perusing nearby postings, similar to the ones on The Knot Marketplace. Cautiously survey potential picture takers' sites and online journals to look at photographs of different weddings they've shot, which will give you a thought of their style. How would they catch the minutes essential to you, similar to a mother clamoring her girl's outfit or an enthusiastic first look? The plan of the site may likewise have pieces of information about the picture taker's character and reasonableness. Look at their Facebook, Instagram and Twitter pages as well, if conceivable. Is the input from customers positive? How does the picture taker react? How would they connect with their Instagram devotees, do they appear to be neighborly and amicable? You get the thought.
Stage 3: Set Up Interviews
This isn't a choice that can be made on looks alone—you should meet your potential picture takers face to face. On the off chance that you like what you see on their site—and their expenses are in your ballpark go—call to check whether they're accessible for your wedding date. On the off chance that accessible, feel free to send a starting email with somewhat about you and your prospective companion, you occasion and the vision for your day, and don't hesitate to append five or so of your extremely most loved photographs from your exploration so they recognize what you love. In the event that the picture taker is as of now set up for your date, you might need to check whether they have a partner or can suggest another shooter with a comparable style. Set up face to face gatherings with three to five potential picture takers who are accessible on your wedding date to take a gander at a greater amount of their work and evaluate whether your characters work. Be set up to discuss your setting, wedding style and what you imagine for your photographs.
Stage 4: See a Few Full Wedding Albums
Try not to put together your choice exclusively with respect to what you find in a picture taker's features display or collection. All things considered, photographic artists show imminent customers an arrangement of their best pictures, all from various weddings, so you're seeing the most elite. The issue with that is you won't get a balanced thought of their work. Request to see a few full exhibitions from genuine weddings they've shot (not another person at their organization) so you can show signs of improvement thought of what your total assortment of photographs may look like after the wedding. On the off chance that you see that the full display photographs are just about comparable to the ones picked in the feature exhibition (that is, they're all so acceptable it's difficult to pick!), you're destined for success. Furthermore, request to see at any rate a couple of complete collections of weddings that are in comparable settings to yours. For instance, in case you're arranging an indoor issue with dull lighting, don't simply see weddings shot outside in common daylight. What's more, in case you're intending to state "I do" on a sea shore at dusk, you'll need to see instances of that.
Stage 5: Review Albums With a Critical Eye
While inspecting a picture taker's collection, search for the key minutes you need caught: Did they get photographs of both the lady of the hour and the man of the hour when they bolted eyes just because? Additionally search for freshness of pictures, insightful organizations (does a shot look great the manner in which it was surrounded, or is there a lot of messiness in the casing?) and great lighting (be careful with cleaned out pictures where little subtleties are obscured—except if that is the style you're after). It's likewise significant that you distinguish affectability in catching individuals' feelings; ensure the picture taker's subjects look, dislike deer trapped in headlights. While both of you are significant, obviously, you need to see grinning shots of your companions as well.
Stage 6: Make Sure Your Personalities Mesh
Try not to belittle the significance of preferring and holding with your picture taker. Is the picture taker energized by your vision when you depict it? When they cause proposals, to do they present them in a reasonable and aware manner, or would they say they are meek? Are their quirks off-putting? So as to get the best photographs, go with a master who has a firm handle of social graces yet is sufficiently striking to go out chasing for incredible pictures and who, most importantly, comforts you and doesn't bother you in any capacity. Keep in mind: They'll be shadowing everything you might do, and the more agreeable both of you are with the picture taker, the better the photographs will turn out. Similarly, you don't need the picture taker to irritate or bother any visitors, yet to shoot them in their best light in an inconspicuous way. To get the best photographs, your picture taker should be sufficiently confident to search out extraordinary minutes, persuading enough to cajole loosened up grins and characteristic positions from visitors, and sufficiently quiet to be a positive power. They ought to pose heaps of inquiries and be a decent audience.
Stage 7: Compare Packages
You won't have the option to nail down a definite dollar sum until you're certain about what you need, what number of collections you need and where your picture taker is based, and bundles extend from $2,500 as far as possible up to $15,000-in addition to on the higher finish of the range. When meeting applicants, request a general range dependent on the picture taker's standard "shooting expense" and bundle, in addition to their standard rates for the kind of collection you think you'll need and the measure of inclusion you're wanting to book the best wedding photographer Click here . .
 It's critical to discover what's remembered for the standard bundle, in addition to the fundamental range for any additional items you may need, similar to a commitment shoot, embellishments or extra inclusion, so you can look at rates. Specifically, discover precisely how long of inclusion are incorporated. In a perfect world, you need your picture taker to be there for your full wedding day—from when you begin preparing until after you make your amazing way out from the gathering. While bundles differ, most incorporate around 6 to 12 hours to cover everything from preceremony occasions (preparing with your bridesmaids or first-look photographs) as far as possible of the gathering. 
It's generally better to pay for more inclusion if there's an opportunity you'll run over and you unquestionably need your picture taker there until the end (additional time is normally charged at a higher hourly rate). Additionally consider whether you'll need to do a commitment shoot or have your picture taker shoot different occasions during your wedding end of the week (the folks' golf excursion, the bridesmaid lunch).
Likewise, if there's a subsequent shooter remembered for the agreement, and if there's not, get some information about the chance. It's feasible the subsequent shooter can be affirmed later on, yet the principle advantage to having two shooters is, obviously, you get twice as a lot of inclusion. For instance, during your conventional photograph meeting, one picture taker can catch the formal photographs, while the subsequent one can get in the background, photojournalistic photographs, similar to your visitors blending. In case you're having a bigger wedding (250 visitors or more), you may even need to get some information about having three shooters so your photography group.
Stage 8: Ask About Your Rights
Most agreements stipulate that the picture taker possesses the rights to all photographs taken at the wedding, even you ones. At the end of the day, the picture taker can utilize them promotionally (on their site or blog, submit them for production and even spot them in advertisements). That likewise implies you can't simply post the advanced verifications they send you—most picture takers have a strategy that you can just share watermarked pictures or pictures with their credit on them. Likewise, except if you haggle in any case, on the off chance that you need to print the pictures yourselves or request a collection from another source, you'll need to hire the best wedding photographer.
Stage 9: Get the Postproduction Details
It as a rule takes at any rate a month to recover each one of those photograph proofs from your picture taker. Why? Your picture taker is shooting tremendous crude documents far greater than your ordinary JPG. Shooting crude records gives your picture taker more noteworthy capacity to address the photograph, however it likewise sets aside a more extended effort to transfer, process and alter every one of those documents (so as to address shading levels, etc). It differs, however numerous picture takers state they go through an extra 40 hours altering pictures from a solitary wedding, so it can take up to six to about two months (or more, contingent upon the photographic artist and that they are) to get proofs back.
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wambsgansroy · 7 years ago
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On a scale of 1 to 10, how much would U hate me if I said all of them ? :-))
you are SO lucky i have no homework due tomorrow
EDIT this took me so goddamn long i hate u
1. When did you both get together?
september 16th 2016 !
2. Who made the first move?
you did ! she told me she liked me ha
3. How long have you been a couple?
13 months
4. How did you first meet?
this freaking website sjhfdag
5. Were you already close friends before going out as a couple?
yes :”)
6. Are you/Were you ever in the same class at school?
no
7. Are you long-distance?
yea :(
8. Are you in an open, regular or committed relationship?
idk what ‘regular’ means but we are so exclusive it’s embarrassing
9. Do you live together?
not yet
10. Are you engaged? If yes, describe your proposal. If no, what ring would you like?
no but i wanna engrave things on our rings for each other (her idea)
11. Are you married? If yes, describe your wedding. If no, would you consider marriage?
not yet
12. Which one of you is older? What is the age difference?
she’s 2 years older
13. Which one of you is taller? What is the height difference?
HA i’m like 3 inches taller
14. Do you share any of the same hobbies/interests/passions?
yea we are both interested in politics/arts/animals and we like a lot of the same shows and movies and music
15. What fictional couples would you compare yourselves to?
uhhhhh this is a hard one i’m gonna go with the falsettos lesbians
16. Sum up your relationship in 6 words or less.
perfect wonderful safe happy healthy magical
17. Doodle a little picture of you both as a couple.
lmao i was doing this yesterday here we are with our future dog named jesse
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18. Describe your relationship using only emoticons.
i’m on my laptop but all the smiling and heart ones19. Share a cute photo of you both together.
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ATTRACTION20. Top 5 fav things about your partner.
her intelligence
her sense of humor
her kindness and patience
how she always makes me feel better even when im in the worst mood
how she always gives me good advice
21. Your partner’s top 5 fav things about you.
i believe shes said my writing ? yikes
my sense of humor on occasion
my taste in women obviously
my extremely outspoken opinions
all my many talents (sike)
22. What physical traits do you find most attractive about your partner?
her eyes / eyeliner
her hair
her body
her skin is so soft and nice
her hands are also soft and she’s good with them if u know what i mean
23. What physical traits does your partner find most attractive about you?
hair
eyes 
mmmm eyelashes
***** lmao
hands probably
24. What personality traits do you find most attractive about your partner?
oh man i just listed it but she’s literally the kindest most generous most patient person ever
25. What personality traits does your partner find most attractive about you?
i’m literally awful but she’s said my humore
26. Do you hold hands in public? Any other public displays of affection?
yea we kiss and hug in public lmao
27. List your top 3 turn-ons about your partner.
the fact that she’s a top and d*minant
when she kisses my neck
when we make out esp in the shower
28. List your partner’s top 3 turn-ons about you.
straight from her ladies and gays
apparently my sex noises
the fact that i trust her (i completely do)
my lips n kissing :)
29. How would you seduce your partner? How would they seduce you?
we do a fair bit of sexting and when we’re together we make out or have sex in the bath or bed slakhsjkg this is nsfw
30. Innocently or not, where do you like your partner to touch you?
EVERYWHERE
31. Describe your partner’s eyes.
beautiful and so full of light and so expressive and looking in them makes me feel safe and at home
32. Describe your partner’s hair.
very soft and silky and nice to touch
33. Describe your partner’s smile.
literally the most beautiful thing ive ever seen. landscapes and sunsets dont have shit on her
34. What is your partner’s voice like?
just very soothing and warm
35. What is your partner’s scent like?
like her vanilla (i think) perfume and v warm shgjkhg
36. How does your partner impress you? How do you impress them?
shes SO SMART and she wont admit it but shes so good at art and she’s just so strong and i impress her by sending her writing that then gets her in trouble at school and by performing
37. What outfit would you like to see your partner in? What would they like to see you wear?
she likes this sheer black shirt i have and when i wear her sweatshirts and i think she looks gorgeous in anything pink and in my clothes
38. Show your fav picture of your partner that they’ve posted online.
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have you ever in your life seen such an ethereal gorgeous goddess i dont think so
ROMANCE39. Do you have cute pet names for each other?
baby, babe, love, angel, princess, wife, etc
40. What’s one of your favourite memories as a couple?
the most recent one i have is us laying in my bed post sex watching breaking bad and her falling asleep in my arms and just feeling so full and safe and happy and like i could stay in that moment forever
41. Describe your favourite date so far?
oh god SO MANY but when we went to see dear evan hansen in july that was pretty spectacular
42. What’s the sweetest thing that your partner’s ever done for you?
everything but for our anniversary she made me a whole book of reasons she loves me and it’s my favorite gift in the whole world
43. Do either of you get jealous?
we both do to a healthy degree
44. Is one of you protective of the other?
we both are in different ways
45. How do you both like to kiss?
we like to make out :’) but we kiss a lot casually like waking up or to say thank you :’’)
46. How do you both like to cuddle?
i’m usually the little spoon
47. What’s a gift that you’ve given to your partner? And one they’ve given to you?she gave me this aforementioned book and I gave her a necklace I think she really likes also once a scrapbook
48. Are you an openly mushy couple or a reserved couple?
mushy jshgjfgagf
49. Does one of you like to cook for the other?
we literally just go out everywhere but i’m a better cook lmao
50. Do you have unique ringtones/images for each other on your phones?
we have lots of emojis by our names and cute icons for each other
51. Have you ever had your initials written on a tree or in the sand?52. What’s “your song”?
ilysb by lany
53. Do you own any items that are a special symbol of your relationship?
we have promise rings and matching necklaces ! and i have a locket from her and she has a necklace from me
54. What did you both do for Valentine’s Day?
she got me flowers and a bracelet and i got her a bathbomb and chocolates i think :’)
55. Do you express your love lavishly or discreetly?
both !
56. What’s the funniest thing you can remember your partner doing?
when she asked me to prom she gave me a stuffed whale and when i squeezed it it said ‘whale you go to prom with me’ and i died
57. Does thinking about your partner still give you butterflies?
yes she’s all i think about in school
58. What’s the weirdest part of your relationship? Idkkk I think we can be very weird and comfortable with each other and I love that
BEING TOGETHER59. Fav things to do together on a rainy day?
go to a coffee shop and talk
60. Fav things to do together on a sunny day?
go out walk around get coffee go swimming if we can !
61. Got any plans together for next week?
no :( just facetiming i wont see her till november :(
62. What’s your favourite thing to share together?
a bathtub
63. What did you do for your partner’s latest birthday? What did they do for yours?
her birthday is in a month and i’m pretty happy about my gift for her and for my bir
64. Where would you like to go on holiday together?
paris !!
65. You have a whole weekend to yourselves and 500 in cash- what do you do?
oh man we’d probably go somewhere uhh with 500 probably just somewhere in america maybe cali and get a hotel and lots of coffee and walk around
66. How would you comfort your partner on a bad day? How would they comfort you?
the other day i burst into tears and she was so helpful and let me be stupid and just hugged me :( and i try to do the same for her even though i give shit advice
67. Where would you both get takeout together?
pizza probably
68. What’s the longest time you’ve been apart?
2 months
69. What things remind you of your partner? What things remind them of you?
ahs, cats, psychology, eyeliner, red hair remind me of her, brba, game of thrones, broadway reminds her of me
70. Has your relationship changed at all since it first started?
we’ve definitely built so much trust and grown together and changed opinions and stuff
71. Have you ever worked on a project together?
uhhh not that i can think
72. Have you both influenced each other in any way?
yes
73. Have either of you made sacrifices for this relationship?
hm not anything huge idt
74. Has you discovered anything surprising about your partner?
sure she surprises me all the time
75. How have you both made a positive impact on each other’s lives?
she’s made me so happy and made me want to be a better person and helped me figure out what i want/who i want to be and i think i’ve encouraged her and made her happy :)
76. What do you both mutually agree is the most important part of your relationship?
trust and love
EVERYDAY LIFE77. What are the everyday things you both do to show you care about each other?
we tex gm and gn, we buy each other food and stuff when we’re together, we always check in on each other
78. Do you follow each other’s blogs/twitter/instagram?
duh
79. Is there a favourite place that you both frequently go to together?
any coffee shop esp one in my neighborhood called gather
80. What TV shows do you like to watch together?
breaking bad, the office, american horror story, and i recently made her start glee bc she isn’t a real lesbian
81. How do you relax together?
cuddling and listening to music or watching tv
82. What sleep positions do you tend to sleep together in?
spooning with her as the big spoon
83. Do you borrow each other’s clothes or other items?
yessss
84. Do you ever share the bathroom together?
yea lmao
85. How do you both keep in touch when you’re away from each other?
text, skype, ft, calling, rabb.it
86. Do you share secrets between each other?
yea she knows everything about me
87. Do you rotate house chores or do you each have assigned chore duties?
we dont live together yet but we both do all stuff lmao
88. Do you remember how your partner takes their coffee/tea/bar drinks?
iced coffee w/ cream and sugar or iced chai latte
89. What does your partner think of your Tumblr?
shes my biggest fan :’)
90. What characters do you play as together when playing multiplayer games?
uh we aint gamers
COMPATABILITY91. Are you both introverted/extroverted or opposites?
i’m a little more extroverted
92. Who is the more dominant/submissive one?
alexis is more dominant fjhsadhfjsg
93. What are some major differences between you both?
i have a shorter temper than her skfhjadgs
94. When are you both “in your element” together?
when we’re chilling in a park or in bed just cuddling and talking wow gay
95. Who would win in an arm-wrestling contest?
ALEXIS WE DID THIS ONCE AND IT WASNT EVEN A CONTEST
96. What are each of your zodiac signs and how do they compare?
pisces and scorpio and we are v compatible
97. What are each of your MBTI types and how do they compare?
ngl i dont know either of ours
98. What are each of your Hogwarts houses and how do they compare?
i’m a ravenclaw and alexis is slytherin and i think it works out great
99. If you were both in a dating sim, what character tropes would each of you be?
i’ve never played sims
100. If you were both animals what would you be? Would you be the same animal?
we’d be cats i think
101. How does your partner’s wardrobe differ from yours?
you wear more tee shirts then me probably i wear more sweaters and button downs
102. Have you ever both said something at the exact same time?
yeah but not anything like groundbreaking ha
103. Rate your relationship on a scale of basic vanilla (1) to extremely kinky (10)
6-7 sometimes less depending on the mood shkfjadsjf
104. Mix your fav colour with your partner’s fav colour- what is the result?
peach :’)
105. If you were both ingredients, what would each of you be and what would be the resulting recipe? (e.g. PB & jelly sandwich)
we’d be fruit in a smoothie i’d be raspberry and she’d be strawberry
106. Which of you would win in a Pokemon battle? Assign yourself and your partner a fitting Pokemon type (e.g. water, grass, poison etc). Are either of you super effective against the other?
i literally could not tell you one (1) pokemon
CONFLICT107. What happens when you argue with each other? How do you both make up?
ok we really dont argue a lot but when we do we just talk about what’s happening that we’re upset about and we talk and process and explain it lmao gay
108. What’s something that your partner does that annoys you? How do you annoy them?
ummm she doesn’t have a lot of traits that like genuinely annoy me idk how to answer this
109. What are some imperfections that you love about your partner?
?? you are perfect idk you can occasionally procrastinate but same
110. What are some imperfections that your partner loves about you?
i get v aggressive and defensive very fast
111. Has your partner ever accidentally hurt you? Have you accidentally hurt them?112. Is there anything about you that your partner just doesn’t understand?
probably why i get so mad at ppl who aren’t her so easily skdlgjajg
113. Is there anything about your partner that you just don’t understand?
how she’s so patient and forgiving lmao
114. When was the last time you cried about your relationship and why?
yesterday bc i missed her
115. What is something you love that your partner hates?
dark chocolate
116. What is something you hate that your partner loves?
most horror movies
117. When was the last time you had to apologise to your partner and why?
i dont really remember the last major thing honestly
118. Do either of you get too clingy?
we are both clingy and we love it
119. Do you have any insecurities about your relationship?
i mean shes like. out of my league but i trust alexis a lot so not really
120. When was a time that your relationship was put to the test?
idk distance is always a test i guess we’ve never had any major (or minor) threats of a breakup
121. What would your partner have to do to make you end the relationship?
i love her pretty unconditionally
RELATIONS122. Does your family approve of your relationship?
yea my parents love her
123. What do your friends think of your relationship?
my friends love alexis
124. How do you both act together around others as opposed to when you’re alone together?
we talk a lot of shit when we’re alone sdjkbfhdjga but honestly it’s a lot of pda either way
126. Do you think you and your partner look similar to each other?
i don’t esp since i cut my hair
127. How does your partner treat you special compared to everyone else in their life?
she buys me cute gifts and i think you tell me more than most people ? also you give me or*asms :)
128. Do you both have a mutual friend group, or only separate friendship groups?
mostly separate friends bc long distance but we’re friends with each other’s friends
129. What’s a common misconception about your relationship?
i think people sometimes think it’s less serious than it is bc long distance lmao sike
130. Has your relationship affected any of your relations with others?
not really
131. Has anyone tried to sabotage your relationship?
no sdkfjhdkjf
132. Quote something somebody has said about your relationship.
“i wanna find someone who loves me like you love alexis”
133. Quote something somebody has said about your partner.
a random girl in my school hallway: “your gf is so pretty!” me: ik
FUTURE134. What do you hope for the future of your relationship?
we’re gonna stop being long distance in less than 2 years, then we’ll move in together and probably get married after college asjkdhfajdgs ahh
135. If you both got married, what would you want your wedding to be like?
classy but small with our close friends and outdoors with live music
136. Can you imagine what your ideal home would look like?
ideally a big penthouse looking over central park with lots of windows and a big bed and a clawfoot tub
137. Do you have kids/want to have kids? What would they be like?
we’re gonna adopt one daughter name undecided she’s gonna be happy
138. If you could do anything for your partner what would you do?
i’d make it so that you never had to feel sad of stressed again and i’d pay your college funds and i’d buy us a house
139. Do you think you’ll still be together when you’re old and wrinkly?
i know it
140. Got any relationship advice?
hmmmm trust your partner. communicate and tell them about things we do that a lot and it’s one of my favprite things about us
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justabelfastgirl · 5 years ago
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This is a repost from Northern Irish Girl Online which is no longer active.
Hello, you beautiful, sexy, people,
Thanks again to the AMAZING ROSS, I felt that should be in capitals because it’s like a superhero name. He tagged me in this and I loved his responses so I’m excited to get started with this one.
1. I can text in Swedish/Danish (kind of)
Have you ever seen The Bridge? It’s a Swedish/Danish show based on two detectives. It’s probably one of the hubby and I’s favourite shows to watch together next to Parks & Rec, Brooklyn 99 (NINE-NINE! Fans of the show will get this and I better see it in the comments!) and The Vikings (Ragnar can father my children whenever he wants, thanks).
We got so engrossed in it that we started texting each other in Swedish and Danish one day, lol. We know a few words just from watching the show so much and the rest was down to Google Translate. It’s on the bucket list to visit both Sweden and Denmark one day and the infamous bridge the show is named after. I can’t recommend it enough.
I don’t mind watching a programme with subtitles as you honestly get so engrossed in what is going on that you don’t even realise they aren’t speaking the same as your native tongue.
Author Top Tip: It’s also a brilliant way to learn a new language.
2. Farts
My farts, or as we say in Northern Ireland if we want to be polite, poofs, are so loud that they can wake people from their sleep. My biological mother used to tell me that if I was sitting on the floor (which I tended to do a lot, I found a hard floor more comfortable than a chair, I still do… I don’t know why), and I farted that she could feel it vibrate in her feet.
I suffer from Irritable Bowel Syndrome and was first diagnosed at 17 whilst studying for my A-Levels. I’ve lived with it for a very long time so I know what can upset my stomach and what might set me off. I have to be so careful with my stress levels as that’s my biggest trigger. I do plan to do a post on it as I’ve noticed the pain has increased as the years have gone on, so I’m currently researching more on the subject before I post my own blog post on it.
3. I’m weirdly obsessed with certain cultures and historical eras.
I’m weirdly obsessed with Native American culture, I have been for as long as I can remember. I think it first started when I was a kid and saw Pochantos which, fun fact, is my favourite Disney film. For those unsure of what I mean by Native American culture or haven’t seen Pochantos (um… why are you reading this? Go watch it!) I mean Indians. Not people from India, see below picture.
I mean… he’s not wrong.
Historical Eras I’m obsessed with are Ancient Egypt, especially the Gods & Goddesses. Which is strange because I have little to no interest other “modern-day” Gods. However, I would definitely follow the Ancient Egypt Gods until the end of the earth. Weird, right? My favourite was, of course, Anubis, not because he was the God of the Afterlife, but because duh, he was a Jackal’s head.
Photo Credit: Sunima
The Tudors
Again, this is strange (you’ll see why on my next one), but Henry VIII era had me totally absorbed in History class and I remember asking my Nanny that I wanted books on The Tudors for Easter that year instead of an egg (yeah, I was that geek). I really don’t know why as we all know that Henry was a wee wanker when it came to women. He was just greedy all around with food, money and women.
Big Henry VIII – The Original Manwhore Fuckboy
4. I don’t like The Queen and hate the hype around The Royals
Before you start, my mum (my step-mum) pretty much verbally smacked me for saying this. My mum loves The Queen, as does my dad. My granda… he was on the fence from my chats with him. I honestly feel the older I get, the more I remember my talks with my hero, the more I realise he has basically formed my opinion’s on a lot of things. The only time I’ve watched anything Royal related was Harry & Meghan’s wedding because Harry is an actual ledge (and I have a bit of a thing for him, I’m not gonna lie) and I was already a fan of Meghan from her role in Suits. Also, has anyone seen the bad lip reading at Harry & Meghan’s wedding?
If not, I swear on my life it’s funnier than the Star Wars ones. If you haven’t seen those or the NFL ones either… I, I just dunno what to say to you. Who even are you? I’m such a good egg (only because I mentioned it I had to go watch it again or I’d make you go find it yourselves) that I have provided the video for you below. Prince Wills isn’t so bad, especially after I watched this. For the record, I personally think Hagrid (Rubeus Hagrid for the diehard #HP fans) was the right answer. I mean, no one is as cool as Hagrid.
youtube
PW: “I hope you understand we’re puppets” 
PH: “You said we had free will.”
PW: “No, I didn’t.”
Wills telling Harry the real truth. May 2018
Why do I not like Big Lizzy? Several reasons, the main one being CHARLES,  idol-worshipping of someone who from where I sit hasn’t really done much and that’s with research, I wish we could vote. I’d totally vote for Harry to take the crown at least the charities he, Wills and their wives get involved in are ones that will really make a difference. People may say she isn’t control of a lot of things as she has left it to the governments in the United Kingdom Let me ask you this then, who does the Wicked Witch of Downing Street, I mean… Teresa May, report to? Uh-huh.
Big Lizzy is also the boss of the HM Forces, yet I don’t think she even cares how much those lads and ladies are actually paid. I ranted about this on Twitter recently when Andrew Trimble, Ulster Rugby player (I think?), said he wasn’t paid enough to “go to battle” every day. Andrew Trimble earns hundreds of thousands of pounds from playing rugby, sponsorships, appearances and so on. When I educated him on how much a Marine is paid before he passes out he shut up immediately and stopped responding to me. I looked for the Tweet for ages and then got fed up, it’s on my Twitter somewhere, good luck finding it!
Now, he’s not the only one. You look at footballers, celebrities and so on, they earn millions. Soldier’s will never make that amount of money, but they fight for our freedom. Anyone else see something wrong with this?
I grew up with military family members, not only that, but I lived on the Shore Road which was smack bang in the middle of North Belfast. Every single day, I would go outside and wait for the PSNI and RIR (Royal Irish Regiment), British Army, possibly the Royal Marine Commandos (RM aka, LADSSS) to drive past my house so I could wave at them and tell them that they were amazing. I was 11 when The Good Friday Agreement came into force, I was a child that grew up in the Troubles. My after school TV had a few kids shows, and a lot of Northern Irish news whilst my dad lived with me. The older I got the less kid/teenage TV the more I watched the news.
5. I’m still on the hunt for three books I read as a teenager over 20 years ago
Photo Credit: Jaredd Craig
You will never know how painful that sentence was to write, 20 years ago!! I still think I’m fucking 20 then I get slapped in the face with the fish of reality and it hurts me to my soul. Anyways, I read three books that to this day I remember like it was yesterday. The thing about it is they weren’t life-changing books at all, all of them were fiction. I’ve tried searching for them by the titles I remember them by, but to no avail. I asked my library, but they changed their system 10 years ago so there is nothing from prior to that, anymore. I have even gone on websites and described the books in detail, but nothing and it’s my biggest pet hate, ever.
My hubby said it just shows when I’m determined to do something I never give up on it. He should know, I was determined to do him 14 years ago, 14 years on and almost 9 years of marriage and it’s still happening, lol!
6. I’m quite smart and have a freakish memory
And Omigod totally modest! Not tooting my own trumpet, but you don’t study Psychology if you haven’t got some brains.
I can’t remember what I did yesterday, but I could probably tell you the worst serial killers ever known, the horror films that have certain aspects of them that are inspired from real historical events (and they aren’t the ones you think), be able to figure out what films Will Ferrell quotes come from (thanks mostly to my husband who is a big fan of Will Ferrell, as am I), what a book I read 20 years ago was about and what I thought of it, song lyrics, full songs, history and shit.
I could also probably tell you something that happened in my childhood in great detail, but if you asked me what I did in work last week, I’d just shrug and be like…. “talking to people and shit”.
7. I’m a massive tomboy and I once got my finger trapped in a grating (drain cover) looking for a tennis ball whilst plotting to murder IT with a tennis racket.
“Eddie discovered one of his childhood’s great truths. Grownups are the real monsters, he thought.”  – Stephen King, IT.
Okay, let me explain. I, as I mentioned in a previous post, grew up around lads. I was the eldest granddaughter on my dad’s side and second eldest on my mum’s side. This meant the people I looked up to were all lads, I used to fight with my other female cousin all the time. Which is funny because when we got older we were as close as sisters. It was because I was such a “lad”. I love football, wrestling, playing rugby, kickboxing, getting dirty, gaming and other stereotypical “laddy” things.
I’ve more male friends than I do female, but my three best friends are all female. I’m on good terms with every single one of my exes, bar one. Whilst in the majority of the relationships, I broke it off, I did it in a way that wasn’t dickish and tried to cause the least amount of pain to anyone and everyone involved.
My two best friends, Barrie and Bryan (they’re brothers and we’re still in touch today), we were going through our wanting to be a tennis player phase. This was in between our Power Rangers, Ninja Turtles and Marvel Superhero’s phase. Barrie and I were slamming some serious ball against the wall in my back garden with our tennis rackets.
I can’t remember which one of us it was, but I’m going to blame Barrie because he’s not going to read this to defend himself, but the ball ended up disappearing down the drain. Being the intelligent childer we were, we followed what we thought was the right pipe system, out through the cul-de-sac out of my back to the drain just across the road from Barrie’s house.
We thought this would be the drain it would appear in. I had seen IT by this point, Barrie had not. I wouldn’t call Barrie a pussy, because he actually fights for a living now and would no doubt kick my ass for it, but let’s just say he was a sensitive wee sausage when we were young. 
I was determined to find IT and beat him to death with my tennis racket so my thought process, being the kid I was, was that if we lifted the lid he’d either hear it and come to us or already be there. I was determined to protect Barrie at all costs, despite him being a few months older, he and Bryan were like brothers to me and everyone who knows me knows, I’d put anyone who hurts my family in the ground.
Barrie was in charge of holding the grating lid open and I was in charge of retrieving the ball when it came past (and also unbeknownst to Barrie killing IT). I can’t remember whether it was a car, someone yelling at us to get out of the drain (quite possibly this one) or, Barrie just being a fucking eejit and not paying attention, but he dropped the grating lid on my right fingertips.
I don’t know who cried more me or him. I think him, we ran back to my house, my fingers pissing blood and both of us covered in it looking like we’d just sacrificed ourselves to Satan. For some reason, I remember there being quite a few of my dad’s family in the house that day visiting, but it could be my warped memory of my childhood.
Both sets of parents were there that day, course mother dearest went absolutely nuts yelling at me, I, again, protected Barrie despite him clearly giving himself away by crying (because he felt so guilty he had hurt me and that I was bleeding so much, told you he was a sensitive wee sausage). Saying it was my fault and my idea, the truth did come out in the end. My four fingernails were hanging off, the worst being my middle finger.
I don’t remember an A&E visit, but I remember one of my bigger cousins saying I was hardcore as I was only crying because I’d gotten blood on me and was still deadly fearful of my mother beating me back then. He told me my fingers tips were clearly broken as they’d been crushed in the grating. 
My dad ended up having to pull the middle fingernail off as it was just hanging there, at least I think it was my dad, it could have been my ma, I don’t remember I thankfully blocked out the actual experience, the rest of them broke off. To this day, my fingernails and fingers are off to one side. See pics for proof, below.
8. I love to learn, a lot!
I’ve said this previously, but for those new here, I used studying as an escape, same with reading, from what I suffered as a kid. I would get lost in history books, books from the library, for hours on end.
I read abnormally fast, often finishing a standard 330-word book in half a day if I am up early, or a day depending on what I’m doing. I bring a book with me everywhere I go, just in case.
Holiday’s are funny as there is usually at least 6 books and a Kindle in my hand luggage, increasing to 8 to 12 books by the time I get on the plane. My hubby just rolls his eyes, now but knows they’ll get read.
To put my learning into perspective I thought the best thing to do would be to create a table which is split into self-taught and qualified/things I hold certificates in. It’s a bit mental to look at, but 100% my proudest achievement after being mentally healthy following a 2 year battle with my PTSD.
Self Taught Academia Criminal Psychology Psychology and soon to be Forensic Psychology Photography Dental nursing Photo Editing History (Irish & UK) Blogging, Writing English & English Lit Criminology Criminology Human Resources Human Resources Counselling Counselling (including CBT, Life Coaching, Career Coaching) Rearing dogs from pups to adults Autism (including all areas of the spectrum) Norse Methodology Health & Social Care Wiccanism Business Administration History of Music & Music Genres Psychology Parapsychology Makeup Artistry, Beautician & Nail Technician Computer programming (hacking, website creation) Viral Marketing Cooking Art & Design Swedish/Danish (written, only) BASIC French (Oral & Written) Basic Italian – Basic/Intermediate at the moment Sewing, crochet Maltese – Intermediate First Aid (Child, Adult & Pet) Book Publishing  (with coaching from my sis Christina) Business Auditing UK, NI and Irish Law Sign Language Level 1 UK, NI and Irish Employment Law UK, NI and Irish Employment Law Child Psychology & Counselling (mentoring from NSPCC) Woodworking, carpentry, building smaller homemade objects Mental Health Conditions & Disorders Accounting Different religions and cultures Sociology
This isn’t me showing off, just as an FYI. This, to me, is a list of things I have used as PTSD survival techniques. I’ve posted twice about what happened to me when I was younger.
I also challenge you all to make a list of things you have taught yourself when I say self-taught, I mean not going to a school, college, university online or off at any time. It doesn’t matter if you were taught it by a family member or something like that, it’s anything you’ve taught yourself to do without the help of professionals.
I would be deadly interested to see everyone else’s lists, and probably want them to teach me stuff I don’t know, lol.
9. I’m obsessed with little Asians and want to adopt all the little Asians, but my husband won’t let me.
I don’t know okay? I really don’t know when it started or how it started. My dad (who is not racist, I promise) always calls me cheeky face or, I swear he isn’t racist, he just isn’t very original with nicknames, I’m sorry if this offends, oval eyes. I’ve a round-shaped “pea” head as my dad and husband like to remind me of on a somewhat weekly basis, they’re wee shites like the Chinese people (known for having rounder faces).
I have oval-shaped eyes (doesn’t everyone you say, actually no, no they don’t) which are angled upwards, like a person of Chinese descent. I have my granddaddy’s eyes as you honestly couldn’t tell whether he was squinting or his eyes were wide open. Mine is slightly more open than his, but when I’m tired you can see why my dad has dubbed me what he has.
When we pass anyone of Phillipene, Chinese, Thai or Japanese descent husband calls them my people because I absolutely love them and I really do have myself convinced that, as well, as being Italian/Maltese/Northern Irish/English I have either Native American (hence my fascination with them) or another Asian descent in my heritage. I’d love to do that 123 and Me test, but I don’t have a spare $50. If you’d like to donate that to me then lemme know, lol. what? You don’t ask you don’t get! 
My cousin is married to a beautiful (inside and out) woman named Christina who is from the Philippines and they have two gorgeous wee kids. I keep “jokingly” telling my family I’m gonna kidnap them one day and adopt them,.
There have been times my friends and my other half have literally had to pull me away from the kids as I just think they’re so cute and I just want to talk to their parents and play with them. That’s really weird, isn’t it? I shouldn’t have told people this… 🤷‍
10. I can rap, well.
Don’t believe me? Ask my three best friends and my husband. My husband couldn’t believe it the first time my friend Sarah B and I rapped every single lyric to Tupac’s – Hit Em’ Up. It was our song, but it’s the same for any other TuPac, Dr Dre, Xzibit, Ludacris, N.W.A, Eminem, 50 Cent, D12, and many, many more songs in my rap repertoire.
I’m going to challenge some different peeps this time, some of my lovely followers. So…. I challenge the following people to do this and tag me so I can read them:
@MsCreativeKerr – Kerry-Ann
@HappyMentality – Ri
@the_rolling_20s ‏ – Ruth
@comfortinganx ‏- Deanna
@larylarxx – Lauren
Don’t forget to tag me so I can read yours! For everyone else, please follow these gorgeous girls.
10 Unusual Facts About Me (A Re Post) @LaureltonStudio #TheClqRT #bloggingtribe @TheBloggersPost @wetweetblogs @sincerelyessie @UKBloggers1 #bloggingbeesrt @BloggingBabesRT #BloggerLoveShare @LovingBlogs This is a repost from Northern Irish Girl Online which is no longer active. Hello, you beautiful, sexy, people,
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robbiemeadow · 6 years ago
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Why I Love Being Stood Up
We’ve all been there – messaging back and forth with a guy from Tinder. We’re unsure about whether or not we even actually want to meet up with them – c’mon, let’s face it, we’re thirty years old and we’ve dated enough to be sick of the dating game. But, they’re insistent. They ask questions, and they seem confident enough with themselves to ask you to meet up. And even though you’re insanely busy, you agree, comforted by their confidence. They contact you throughout the week, asking you how you are doing. You keep the texts short – once again, you’re busy bossing it up, plus wtf really likes to text a lot to a stranger you’ve never met before? The last thing you want is to have spent hours of your day/week texting some dude who turns out to be twenty years older than his pictures show or you end up having ZERO in-person chemistry with. But, you’re a lady and you *almost* always respond and are always friendly.
Then, the morning comes – he invited you to coffee on a Sunday morning. You both plan on meeting at ten at a local coffee shop. You wake up early, well, earlier than you would have for a Sunday, quickly groom yourself and even put on eyeliner and eyeshadow. That’s right, thirty years old and waking up on a Sunday and putting on makeup. This never happens. You even round-brushed your hair so that you didn’t look like a teenager who just rolled out of bed. This takes effort, people. Unsure of how the day will unfold, you put on the most appropriate attire you can think of for a first, casual coffee date – jeans and a light sweater. But don’t worry, the sweater is white and you’ve got a hot pink bra underneath just to show that you’re not a total prude – okay, so it was actually the only one you had clean, but how would he know!?
You drive over there, a little early, but you’re tired from your workweek and need to get a little caffeine in your bloodstream before you can manage an intellectual conversation. You get to the predetermined coffee spot, order your tasty, caffeinated beverage, and wait. Ten o’clock comes by; you have a feeling but choose not to listen to it. Five after quickly comes, then ten after, and finally a quarter after. You’re a strong, confident, and independent woman, so you have respect for yourself, which means that you don’t wait any longer than fifteen minutes for someone, especially a first Tinder date.
We’ve all been there – we got stood up. But, we’re thirty years old now, confident and sure of ourselves. We’re no longer our twenty-something younger selves who over-personalize everything. We know our worth. That all being said, for those of you who are still a little unsure of yourselves, or don’t know how to handle something like this, here’s why I absolutely *love*, no sarcasm, being stood up.
It shows you everything you need to know about the person within fifteen minutes. Think about it. You gave this new person a chance. They have your phone number, and they knew that they scheduled a date with you – they asked! And then, they stood you up. They didn’t even have the courtesy to call or send a text. This shows that they not only don’t respect your time, but they have poor communication skills, and they’re not actually looking for anything serious, no matter what their profile says.
They Didn’t Call or Text Calling to say that they can’t make it at least shows that they value your time – and hopefully, they’ll ask to reschedule. A text does the same thing, but either shows that they’re too scared or introverted to call and say that they can’t make it, or they’re possibly hiding something. A call definitely shows that they care about you, value your time and you can also listen to the tone of their voice to know whether or not they’re being sincere or are hung over or with friends. When someone doesn’t even bother to call or text you, then they either forgot that they committed in the first place, or they simply don’t care. Either way, that’s a person that I don’t want to continue getting to know.
Communication We all know that good communication is key to creating trusting and healthy interpersonal relationships. This is one of the main failures of relationships, according to PsychologyToday. So, if someone doesn’t let you know that they’re not going to be able to meet up for something that they originally committed to, and even worse initiated, then this is the first of many communication issues to come. This is your very first impression of this person outside of messaging on Tinder or via text. If they don’t have the common decency to let you know that they’re not going to be able to meet up for a coffee date, then what else are they going to bail on?
Committment A man who is looking for a serious relationship values commitment, and asking a woman out on a date and setting a time and place is a commitment. It doesn’t matter if you met someone on Tinder, OKCupid, eHarmony, or at a bar, if they no-show for a date with you, then they don’t value commitment, or at least not with you. Period. Sorry, I know that’s blunt, but it’s true. Sure, maybe their grandma died, or they were in a serious car accident, but that rarely is ever the case.
Summary This was really only fifteen minutes of my life that I spent waiting to get to know someone better. And even though I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to go on a date with him, his lack of communication and complete disrespect for my time made the decision SO much easier for me. Now, I haven’t wasted weeks, if not months or even years with someone who wasn’t even that interested in me in the first place, or at the very least that interested in having a serious relationship, which my profile states. I’m very upfront and have no time to waste – I’m a small business owner who is expanding and don’t want to play games with someone or spend my very limited and valuable time waiting on someone who is never going to show.
So, ladies, do you. Don’t wait for anyone. Give someone fifteen minutes – if they don’t call, text, or show up – leave. Value yourself. You deserve someone who is going to show up for you; not someone who is going to make you wait or guess what they are thinking or feeling. Be empowered, focus on yourself, and good things will come. As for me, I’m going to finish cleaning my apartment, thanks to the endocrine-disrupting coconut milk latte from Starbucks, and boss up the rest of my day. I haven’t messaged him yet – and he hasn’t messaged me yet – and I’m not sure if I will. I’m trying to keep my sarcastic nature at bay, but f*** it, I might just show him my true colors.
I’d love to hear about your stood-up stories in the comments! How did you respond, or did you?
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Original article: Why I Love Being Stood Up
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