#kry answers
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Could you perhaps bless us with a snippet of any (possibly joel) upcoming fic :)
also I am totally in love with you, you're one of the best writers on here hihi <33
um, i'm actually sobbing anon, wow. thank you so much. also, ask and ye shall receive.
here is a small snippet for saviour
#kry answers#thank u for the ask!#ask answered#sweet sweet anon#pedro pascal#joel miller#the last of us#joel miller x reader#raider joel
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how does one start clicker training? For science, of course.
real easy! first you need a pet clicker and someone to train you, it's hard to do it to yourself because training yourself is like tickling yourself, your brain is a bit more resistant if you do it yourself. so get you one of these:
and then, each time you feel a lot of pleasure, such as from insertion or when you cum or anything that makes you moan, your trainer hits the button. eventually your brain associates the click with pleasure, and you'll be turned into a cummy mess at the click of a button!
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omg ive always loved ur LOZ art but i just noticed u also drew the sillay pkmn trainers :00000
do u have any headcanons abt any of the pokemon protags and rivals?
I got this ask a while ago but So many I have so many headcanons of these little guys bouncing around my skull but here's some for the Kanto and Jhoto kids to start until my brain decides to whack me with the urge to draw the rest of these guys :p
#my art#pokémon#red#leaf green#blue oak#ethan#lyra#Krystal#Silver#rival silver#rival blue#trainer leaf#trainer green#trainer red#trainer ethan#trainer lyra#trainer krys#asks#answered asks
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this boy has been on the mind lately, he should leave some space for the others i think, selfish prick
#kiyoart#my ocs#oc art#ws × krys#× werespider#i've been pingponging between so many oc thoughts#i can't get into anything lately it seems so the only answer is to get into my own stuff#have random art of them for now until i figure out how to make some semblance of what comprehensible lore art should look like
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🌼🌨️🍀
🌼 least favourite writing genre:
oh heck, i don't even know lol. i'm definitely more of a fiction than a non-fiction person. also i'll say i'm not really a horror fan? i know it's super popular! i am just a baby. 🥺 i can do like a mystery or a thriller. but if it's legitimately scary, then i'm out. 🙈
🌨️ book you hate:
i'm having a hard time thinking of something for this one. aside from like, books we were forced to read in high school 😂 and i mean legitimately bad ones. like my geometry teacher making us read flat land.
🍀 character you would kill off if they were not vital to the plot:
UGHH hard to answer. maybe zandros (asher's bestie) ??? or daelyn or cassia (everly's friends). simply because they would be DEVASTATING. i don't actually know if anyone dies in my wip yet, but there should probably be some of that 🫠
☀️ summertime asks ☀️
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Is Ishida mayhaps in the sky au? and is he mayhaps a solar eclipse?
comes out of the mindscape covered in blood and holding these
💥mind you I'm gonna ramble about my thought process rn be warned💥
GOOD LORD. this ask has been in my mind ever since it was sent and I genuinely could not get a good idea for how he should look like. like . fr
like honestly he's still at a concept stage but I am liking the first image more than my original thoughts for him shown below (plus some more doodles of me trying to figure out his design)
I do like the idea of the staff that he has can also become into a huge scythe (because that is cool fight me.!!! and also kinda references the pickaxe sorta thing that ishida holds in the splash art he officially has)
some ishida notes (mostly for myself to remember):
- ishida's halo looking thing becomes very VERY similar to how Mondo's is, with the light shining out on the sides and showing a more prominent halo but still keeping the little stars he normally has around his head
-his staff becomes a scythe bc I think that is cool and sexy /j but fr it becomes like. A mix of both their staffs,, maybe the combination thing I mentioned once but we'll see
-his expressions are way more intense than they normally are (which says a lot since taka is normally intense)
AND LIKE. I'm still thinking as to what he technically should be since solar eclipses happen every 18 months. And then there's the concept of lunar eclipses too. Like OUGH there's so much to think about and to work with i'm absolutely going to continue thinking about this au for a good while
but thank u sm for sending this ask 🙏
#to be fair though this whole au is under construction and im over here just doodling them as if they already had a basic plot n shit like#THERES SO MANY WAYS I CAN TAKE THE DIRECTION OF THIS AU TOWARDS BUT IM SO INDECISIVE#anyways sorry for the whole ramble#he means everything to me fr#can you tell i had a space/astrology phase when j was a kid or#if any of u guys have questions abt this au then. PLS!! ik it took me forever to answer this one but good lord is it helping me to actually#work on it yk...#have a nice day/night anon :] i appreciate your ask sm#danganronpa#kiyotaka ishimaru#kiyondo ishida#um umm#oh yea#kry k(art)#sky au
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I thought Elizabeth wanted to leave for a while now. She didn’t look to into her character anymore in a number of interviews it looked like she was tired of talking about Wanda. I agree it sucks if that’s what marvel is doing with female leads but if this is what some of the celebs want we can’t change it. More importantly you really shouldn’t recast Wanda when we love Lizzie’s version, same with Maria hill and colbie, same with Natasha and Scarjo. But these actresses are getting older and it’s not really fair to them if they have to limit the projects and roles they do for marvel to use them in a movie that starts filming two years from now and stuff like that. They also aren’t getting younger so it’s nice that the torch is being passed to some of the younger ones that are still in their 20s, and marvel probably learned that they need to let their stars have the ability to venture out more.
But for this I think it was Lizzie’s decision and marvel found a way to just let it be.
I agree, these actresses aren't getting any younger, but also in that same breath, neither are the actors who they are continuously having reprise roles, my biggest thing is that Marvel is making it to where the big female members can't make a return back, which is a big 'L' on their part.
And I've also read the interviews with Lizzie and I applaud her for taking a step back from being Wanda since she's been her for years now, but I dislike the fact that they're just completely writing her character out like she never existed to begin with that bothers me the most.
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*Gestures to my stupid rabbit and your catte from the critically acclaimed MMORPG that’s free until level 60 with no limit on playtime* Go ham my guy -From Krys (@kryssiesbookofselfinserts)
🌼 - What does your S/I like about mine?
✏ - Share/Make up a shared favorite memory of the two!
📸 - Send a meme your S/I would send to my S/I!
BFFIES FOREVEEEEEEER HOOKING HER UP WITH HIS SAD ELF QPP
What does your S/I like about mine?
WHAT DOESN'T HE LIKE? She's so sweet and kind and strong, and such a great friend. She's funny and makes good food, and is just super fun to be around.
Share/Make up a shared favorite memory of the two!
DANCING TOGETHER AT THE YOKAI CONCERT! I have screenies from that still lmao, it was a BLAST
Send a meme your S/I would send to my S/I!
ALL the bnnuy memes >:3c
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Hello I hope so much not to bother, but I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for participating in our AU challenges, 🙏😳 It is a lot to me to receive such support from everyone, and I noticed you fill in all the prompts with such soft fluffy ideas, 🧐🤩 I especially loved Kennyo one there is not much content for him around and I am so very glad to see something for him plus his cat was absolutely adorable and that job totally fit him. 🥰😍
Thank you so so much I am so happy to see you enjoying our challenges, I wish you a wonderful day 🙏🤗
Thank you and Mo for hosting this again. I had a great time doing the challenge last year that I couldn't resist participating again this year. I'm just glad that people wanna put up with my OC nonsense two years in a row.
Soft and fluffy is my main mode of creating content and the next two au entries from me are also gonna be fluffy, so that's something to look forward (no promises on the final one tho. That one's still turning around in my head)
As for Kennyo, he does need some more love, tbh. He's not a major favorite of mine, but some of my discord friends and acquaintances love him, so I can't help but want to create content for him in their honor. And to surround him with cats, it's what he deserves.
Have a good day to you Julie and I hope you keep enjoying the challenge too!
#krys talks#you're not a bother dear <3#matter of fact I still have your first message to me in my inbox when I did the challenge last year#bc I was too shy to answer it then#now it just sits there for my enjoyment#thanks for the ask either way!
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i want to preface this and say upfront you write incredibly well. however it is truly disgustingly fucked up how much you seem to enjoy to get off on borderline rape stories. if you don‘t see a therapist yet, you should. if you do, increase the frequency for the love of god.
damn. i really hope this anon gets the help they need. i am allowed to write what i want to write, just like you are allowed to read what you want to read. i tagged my fic appropriately, so it's on you if you read it and didn't like it.
but thanks for the compliment, ig.
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How would you screw/get screwed by a television?
I- I assume this is gonna be a pun because I got nothin.
I'll bite; how?
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1, 13, and 14 for the end of year writing asks :)
1. what was your writing-highlight this year? what made it special and how will you reflect on it next year? definitely writing my zero draft! i feel like i've said this a billion times over my blog and in servers, but i had no idea what was going on in the middle of my story, and the zero draft really helped me brainstorm and get all of my ideas out. so i'm feeling a lot better about the story as a whole than i used to! and now i have a pretty excellent guide for crafting the actual first draft. (just gotta write real words now 😅)
13. how did you change as a writer? did you learn anything new? started to plan instead of pants? share your wisdom! i think a big lesson i had to learn (one i've known i needed to learn for awhile) was to stop being afraid of my story, what i didn't know about it, and just do it. also, i always thought i hated sprints, but i probably wouldn't have gotten any words down this year without them! turns out i work pretty well with a few intervals of 15-20 undisrupted and dedicated minutes just for writing 😆
14. time for writing wrapped! what would be your top three used sentences? if we're talking about my zero draft, my most used sentence is definitely OKAY SO WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. closely followed by SIDEBAR: and LET'S DO A [SUBPLOT] ARC.
✨ end of the year writeblr asks ✨
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🌻 If you get this, answer with 3 random facts about yourself and send it to the last 7 blogs in your notes, anonymous or not! Let's get to know the person behind the blog 🌻
Let's see!
-I have a Tomodachi life save with all of my ocs from different universes and I enjoy the drama they cause by just interacting with each other
-I like baking! (especially cakes)
-I can't complete games at 100% unless I finish the main quest at the very end
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Fanfic Writer Asks! 5, 11, 35, 51, 71
thank you for sending bb! these asks games are so fun to do while working on things in photoshop. sorry this got so long! y'all know me. i love to wax poetic.
fanfic writing asks -- let's play!
5. how many wips do you have? what fandoms/pairings are they for?
right now i've got two main wips: embraceable you and night sky! the first is a soulmate au in which nobunaga time travels to the modern day. the second is a fic in which my oc, nakamura mirai, is a ninja who's sent to sabotage nobunaga, but falls for mitsuhide. i've got a couple on the backburner though, that haven't been published! another soulmate au from shingen's pov called world of color where you see black and white until you meet your soulmate; however, soulmates of people with gray eyes never have the privilege of seeing color, as they for some reason will continue to see in black and white. the other that i'm working on is chasing constellations, a fic set in the same world as my fic petal snowfall, but this time centered around masamune instead of mitsuhide.
11. do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around?
a bit of both! for long fics such as embraceable you and night sky, i tend to jump around, as the scenes come to me before the setup does when i outline the whole story.
35. what's your favorite fic you've posted?
HANDS DOWN my favorite fic i've posted is the tale of yukimura, kami-sama, and the incredibly long year. this fic was a brainchild for upwards of a year, and i had writers block on pretty much every fic i was working on. i wrote aimlessly for months trying to decide the actual plot, with nothing. then i remember that around halfway through, everything just clicked into place and i knew exactly how to finish it and where i wanted it to go. i live-wrote the ending with @juminly cheering me on, and to this day i'll go back and re-read it at least once a month. i feel that my author's voice really shines in this one. a close second is through my broken and bruised eye, it was you i beheld. i had a vision for it right from the start which i feel i accomplished. and of course i have a special place in my heart for fatal attraction, my first ever fic published here which i wrote to fill the mitsuhide-shaped void in my heart, and ended up truly cementing my love for him.
51. does what you like to write differ from what you like to read?
actually, now that i think about it, yes! i love to write very niche fics with odd plots and unexpected povs. however, i love to read long-form fics that might as well be additional routes added to the game. and of course, i haven't tried my hand yet at writing smut, but i appreciate the well-written smut fics i come across!
71. do you spend more time reading or more time writing?
i don't write as much as i'd like to, but now that i'm nearing graduation and planned my credits accordingly to have an incredibly chill last two semesters, i'm hoping to write more than i read. right now though, it's vice versa!
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Hello! Are you still continuing your Lena Luthor Professor AU?
Hey there, I'm not sure, I'm doing my best to continue some of my series, but I haven't fully decided on The Professor and I just yet, might make a small finale of it, but I'm not sure
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Make things right? Or make them worse?
Yandere!doctor husband (platonic to his children) x twin daughters ocs x female!reader
Summary: Dr Kry’s children finds out their fathers dark secret, and he's determined to silence them.
Warnings: toxic household, yandere, favoritism, guilt, poison, mentions of murder (things along this way)
A/N: I have created my own poison for this story, so I choose the effects. Lol.
Word count: 6.2k
“Bye, dad”, Lydia says and closes the car door.
Her twin follows out of the car, almost hides behind her like a shadow. Lydia frowns confusedly. She’s been more silent than usual this morning. They turn to walk into school.
“Girls”, Dr Kry says through the open car window, catching their attention. “I want you here at three sharp, okay? I’m not in the mood for waiting.”
“Yes, sir”, Lydia answers.
“Good. Have a good day, girls, I’ll see you later.”
With that said, he drives off. Lydia turns to Nadia who finally raises her gaze from her feet.
“What’s wrong?” Lydia asks and fixes her backpack. “You’ve been acting off all morning.”
“I have to talk to you about something”, Nadia says hesitantly and looks at her with uneasy eyes.
Lydia blinked and frowned. “What?”
“I was meaning to talk to you earlier, but I didn’t want to do it when dad was around.” Nadia glanced at the other students swarming around the school grounds. “It’s about mom … and her sickness.”
For as long as they can remember, their mother has been bound to her bed by a rare disease. Thankfully, their father is a remarkable doctor and has been caring for her ever since the twins' birth. He works at a hospital in the city and travels forty minutes back and forth every day, dropping the twins off at school on the way there, and picking them up on the wayback. When they were young, they were put in a private school carefully chosen by their father — who has been very active in the administration.
Their father is a complex person. Although they’ve been by him their entire life, they still feel like they don’t know him. He rarely talks about himself, and seem to have a human side for their mother only. Very rarely, there’s a soft side for the girls … often they’re met by a doctor, rather than a parent. Despite that, Lydia has always been a daddy’s girl, while Nadia has clung to their mom for love and comfort.
“What about it?” Lydia asks carefully.
“I heard something …”, Nadia starts and licks her lips nervously. “I heard these noises, from mom and dad’s room-”
“Don’t tell me you heard them have sex”, Lydia grimaces.
“No …” Nadia shakes her head, eyes shaking. “They were talking. Mom was crying and daad was standing by the bed, holding her cheeks in his hands like this …” She cups her sisters cheeks in demonstration, “...while saying: ‘you’re never going back there, I’ll never share you like that again’.” She shivers. “I-I don’t know what that was, but it made me feel really weird.”
Lydia frowns, trying to picture the scene in front of her.
“Are you sure that it wasn’t just dad’s weird love language?” she asks carefully.
“I don’t know”, Nadia sighs defeatedly. “Mom seemed … scared. She looked up at him with eyes full of terror. She could have had a nightmare or something, but dad’s voice- … it was awful. I don’t know how to describe it, but it sounded extremely dark.”
“We could try to ask her.”
“What if dad hears?”
“I could distract him while you ask, if that helps you ease your worry.”
Nadia smiles gratefully. “Thank you, Lyd.”
Lydia gives her an unsure smile and grabs her hand and they walk into school.
Like Dr Kry had asked them to, they stand by the gates at three sharp. His white car rolls over and the two of them jumps in, Lydia in the front seat and Nadia in the backseat.
“How has your day been?” he asks and drives off.
He always asks about their classes, teachers and friends. If there’s a small detail he doesn’t like, he makes sure to contact the school and let them know his thoughts. More than one friendship has ended thanks to his overprotectiveness and the twins has learned to dilute the truth enough for him to be able to swallow it. So once again, they answer in the way he wants to hear it.
The car drives from the city, gets off the highway and enters a countryside road. The dirt road is divided in the middle with grass, creating enough space for the wheels of his white car to roll forward. Here, nothing can be heard except the sounds of distant birds. Their white, edwardian villa is surrounded by a deep, dark forest, close to a gigantic sparkly lake with the closest neighbor being a kilometer away. Despite the isolating upbringing the twins have had, getting away from the noisy, stressful city to the empty forest always cleanse their brains.
The white, Scandinavian, edwardian aged, wooden villa appears behind the trees like a castle. The house has two floors with a green atticroof, and a bushy, blooming garden in the same color, two glass verandahs on either side of the house and a white fence around the garden.
The twins get out of the car. Nadia gives her a look and Lydia nods.
“Dad”, she says. “I’ve been feeling a bit weird these last days … I think I’m going to be sick.”
“Really?” Dr Kry asks and frowns. He closes the trunk of the car. “Who have you been around? Are any of the other students sick?”
“A few.”
“Nadia, are you feeling bad too?”
“No”, Nadia replies.
“Could you please give me a check up?” Lydia asks.
“Alright, come with me”, Dr Kry says and nods at her to follow him.
While they walk inside, their father and Lydia walks to the living room and Nadia sneaks off upstairs. She moves carefully to their parents’ room and knock gently on the door before entering. Their mother, you, is lying in bed with a book in her hand. You look as weak as ever. Nadia shivers.
“Hi, sweetheart”, you smile and puts down your book on your chest. “Did you have a good day in school?”
“Yes …”, Nadia mumbles and sits down on the side of the bed, unsure on how to start this absurd conversation.
“What’s wrong, Nadia?”
“What happened yesterday? WIth you and dad?”
You flinch. Your smile disappears for a moment for it to appear quickly again, but this time in a fake manner.
“Why did he say that?” Nadia asks carefully. “Why did he say that he wasn’t going to share you again?”
“O-Oh, that …”, you mumble with an embarrassed smile. “It was nothing, don’t worry about it. It was just some adult stuff that me and your dad were talking about.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, honey. Why? Did it make you worry?”
Nadia nods slightly. Y/N gives her a smile and takes her hand.
“It’s okay, sweetheart, there’s nothing to be afraid of”, you reassure Nadia. “Whatever happens between me and your dad is nothing you have to be afraid of. We will always put you and your sister first, okay? There’s nothing you have to be worried about. I love you, darling.”
“I love you too, mom …”
You hug her, and Nadia hugs back, but she can’t help but feel that her heart sinks. Something isn’t right.
The very next day when they’re left off at school, Nadia grabs Lydia’s arm.
“Let’s go to the hospital”, she says the second their father’s car disappears behind the corner. She holds up a metallic key. “I have the key to mom’s old room.”
“What?” Lydia asks in confusion. “Why?”
“I have a feeling that mom isn’t really sick and I have to take a look around in her old hospital room. Something isn’t right!” She clears her throat and lowers her voice. “Mom and dad met at the hospital and that he was her doctor, that much we know, right?”
Lydia nods, trying to follow along.
“Isn’t it weird that a doctor as professional as our dad decided to start a relationship with a patient like that?” Nadia asks, sounding unsure. “And wouldn’t he have done everything he could to make mom feel better? Shouldn’t she be better now? I just … I want to know if he has done something.”
“Do you really think he has?”
“I don’t know. I really don’t know. But something isn’t right, and I feel that. Mom seemed to be put on the spot when I asked her about the interaction I had overheard. She seemed scared.” Nadia grabbed her hand in hers. “Please, Lyd, can we go there and just take a look?”
Lydia hesitates and glances at the private school behind them, contemplating the consequences.
“Please”, Nadia repeats. “If mom is getting hurt, I want to help her.”
“Okay”, Lydia nods.
With that said, they hurry past the school gates before a teacher has the time to catch them. They take the first bus to the state hospital their father works at and hope that he’s with a patient while they sneak around.
They hurry inside the hospital and keep their heads down to make sure that none of the working receptionists would recognise them and report to their father right away. They stay silent until they get into the elevator.
Once out, they sneak over to the door. Lydia stands guard as Nadia presses the key into its lock. The click from the key opening echoes in the empty corridor. Nadia’s hand hovers above the door handle. Her heart twirls around uncomfortably. In a moment, she will be in the room where their parents met, where something happened that made their dad take the decision of stepping over the professional line. If that was good or bad is yet to be known, but she can’t help but feel worried.
The room is empty, in more than one way. The spirits of old memories haunt the room and they leave a sour taste in the twins’ mouths. Lydia looks towards the bed. Their mother has been lying here for months with a sickness that has kept her bed bound for years. But what happened while she was here?
“What are we looking for?” Lydia wonders.
“Anything”, Nadia shrugs and looks around. “Whatever that can help us is fine. Journals, reports, notes — anything.”
They start to rummage through drawers, in binders and notepads. Lydia finds herself holding a yellow paper binder with their mother’s name written on it, in their father’s handwriting.
“Nad, look at this”, Lydia says and holds up the binder.
They put the binder on the desk and start to pull out papers. Every paper is written from the top to the bottom in ink.
“He has documented her every day …”, Lydia says, perplexed. She shakes her head in denial. “Every single day, every single hour. Obsessively. Look, every little detail is written down. ‘12:35, eaten an apple’, ‘16:52, took a shower’, ‘22:30, called for me on the telephone’. What is this?”
Nadia picks up another paper, a smaller, clearly supposed to be hidden between the other sides. She puts her hand over her mouth as her eyes widens.
“Oh no”, she gasps and drops the paper. “No, no, no, no …”
Lydia frowns, bends down and picks up the paper. Her heart sinks as she reads the note. It’s a single word, but they’re familiar with it. They’ve found bottles of it in the cellar and the attic multiple times, and when they asked Dr Kry about it, he answered that it was a substance to kill vermin.
“He’s poisoning mom”, Nadia whispers in horror and looks at her twin with wide, terrified eyes.
Lydia feels the air disappear from her lungs. Suddenly, she feels nauseous. She sits down on the rolling stool and tries to control her breathing. Nadia sinks down on the bed with her head in her hands.
“What the fuck do we do?” Lydia breathes out with her eyes staring dimly in front of her. She has never felt this empty before, this helpless. “What the fuck do we do now, Nadia?”
“W-We have to call the cops”, Nadia gulps.
“The cops? Nad, he’s our dad!”
“But if he hurts mom …” Her voice dies out. “We can’t let him take more years from her.”
Lydia nods and wipes the few tears that have begun to run down her cheeks. With shaking hands, she unzips her backpack and shoves the binder down. They will need evidence if they have to prove to the cops.
The door behind them opens. Both girls fly up from their positions and scurry over to each other. Dr Kry walks in and stops abruptly in the door.
“What are you doing here?” he asks quickly.
He’s trying to force a smile, but the red eyes of his daughters and the trembling bodies of theirs are all he needs to see, to know that they know.
“How fucking could you?!” Nadia screams.
Dr Kry hurries to close the door as she continues to shout through sobs.
“What’s your deal with mom?!” she screams. “How can you keep her like this?! Where’s your fucking conscience?!”
She thinks that she’s going to explode in pure fear, anger and sorrow. Dr Kry clenches his jaw and sighs heavily.
“Your mother is a very, very special person”, he says slowly, as if he is talking to a ticking bomb. “It is all a misunderstanding, girls, I will tell you everything at home. Come, we’re going home now.”
“We’re not going anywhere with you”, Nadia spits and stands in front of her frozen sister.
“You don’t have to be afraid of me.” Dr Kry rolls his eyes when they don’t answer. “You’re my daughters, and you are not yet of age, you have to come with me.”
Nadia wants to refuse again, but she doesn’t want to leave her mother alone with him, not when he knows that they know.
“Now”, Dr Kry decides.
Nadia picks up Lydia’s bag and gives it to her sister. It looks like Lydia is going to throw up any second now. Nadia takes her hand and they follow their father out of the room, and out through a back door. For the first time, Lydia sits down in the backseat together with her twin. They hold each others hands tightly and keep silent the entire car ride home.
“Girls, I never wanted you to see that”, Dr Kry sighs and tries to meet their eyes in the rear view mirror. “I- … It’s hard to explain. Your mother is a very special person who I’m very lucky to have met.”
Lydia squeezes her eyes shut, but she can’t keep him out of her head.
When they come home, Nadia drags her sister into the house.
“Girls, don’t go upstairs”, Dr Kry says in that same dark voice Nadia had heard him talk in a few days ago. “I want you to stay down here.”
They halt, suddenly too scared to move.
“I want you to help me with dinner”, Dr Kry says. “Come on.”
The twins glance at each other. Lydia starts to drag her sister to the kitchen. They help in complete silence. Lydia’s hands are trembling while she cuts cucumber and it slips, cutting a slit in her finger. She yelps and drops the knife.
“Oh, honey”, Dr Kry breathes out and grabs her hand. “You have to be careful.”
She doesn’t look at him as he washes her hand under the kitchen sink and puts on a bandaid. Her entire body is in fight or flight mode.
When Dr Kry takes care of the final touches, the twins scurry up to their mother. Your face drops when you see them.
“Why is he doing this to you?” Nadia asks thickly as she tries not to cry. “We found out.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry, girls”, you say sorrowfully. “I wish that you never had to know.”
“Why do you let it happen?” Lydia asks quietly.
“I have no choice … I can’t do anything.” You lower your gaze and voice to an ashamed whisper. “I don’t have the energy to run away, and if I managed to, you’d be in danger and I’d be dead. Your father has the only antidote to his self made poison. It’s safer for everyone if I stay here.”
“But mom …”, Nadia whimpers, “... he’s hurting you.”
“I … I know, dear.”
The door opens behind them.
“Girls, dinner”, Dr Kry says shortly and nods towards the corridor. “Go downstairs.”
The twins turn to you, wanting you to make their decision. You give them a reassuring smile and they leave. You look at the man who has become your husband, much to your dismay.
“Why did you let them find out?” you whisper with tears in your eyes. “You promised that they would never know!”
“I didn't think that they would.” He wipes the tears that roll down your cheeks. “I’ll fix this mess. Don’t worry, darling.”
With that said, he tucks you in and leaves to go downstairs. The twins have sat down by the dining table with their blank, staring eyes turned down into the table. Dr Kry sits down and start to eat, without seeming to care at all about the incidents that happened earlier. Nadia stares down into her plate with disgust roaring in her stomach. If she eats, she’s going to throw it all up in a matter of thirty minutes. She closes her eyes and sighs sadly. Lydia tries to eat a bite, forcing it down her throat.
“Nadia, eat a little”, Dr Kry says.
“I’m not hungry”, she mumbles.
“You need to eat a bit. I won’t allow you to leave the table before you have eaten. Look at Lydia, she’s eating.”
Lydia feels her cheeks heat up as the attention turns to her. She’s suddenly embarrassed over obeying. Feeling exposed and naked under Nadia’s look of disbelief, as if she’s just broken a silent pact. But instead of saying anything, Nadia picks up her fork and takes a bite of the white rice. The twins can agree that this might have been the worst dinner they have ever experienced.
Nadia puts her hand over her heart and clears her throat. There's a heavy feeling over her chest, something almost suffocating. She looks to the side, seeing how Lydia is frowning as well, trying to clear her throat. Nadia think that she looks like she’s going to faint. She wants to ask her how she’s feeling, but doesn’t dare talk in front of their father, afraid to start a conversation.
After dinner, the twins decide to go upstairs, but their legs suddenly feel weak enough to break apart.
“What’s going on?” Lydia whispers and grips the staircase railing.
“I think that he put something in the food”, Nadia whispers back.
“I feel really sick …”
She falls down on her knees in the middle of the staircase, still holding onto the railing. Nadia hurries to pull her up again and drags her over to her bedroom, lazily tucking her in.
“Don’t leave me”, Lydia whimpers and grabs her hand before she can leave the room. “Stay … please. Don’t go. I'm scared.”
Nadia agrees, not wanting to leave. She climbs down under the covers of Lydia’s bed. They lay in silence and look up at the tilted, wooden ceiling. For every minute passes by, they’re growing more and more sick. Every muscle in their bodies seem to ache, twist and turn.
“He’s doing it to us too”, Nadia whispers.
They hear the lock on the door click and give each other terrified looks. Nadia stumbles out of the bed and feel the handle. She gulps in horror and turns back to the bed.
“It’s locked!” she says and breathes out in shock. “He actually locked it …”
“Come back …”, Lydia begs and reaches for her.
Nadia returns to the bed, crawls down under the covers and hugs her. She wraps her arms around her sister and rests Lydia’s head on her shoulder.
“I’m scared”, Lydia whispers.
“It’s going to be okay”, Nadia replies, although she doesn’t believe it herself. “We’re going to be okay.”
Dr Kry removes his tie, about to go to sleep.
“I can’t believe you …”, you whisper from the bed, with her eyes down at her trembling hands.
“Darling …”, Dr Kry sighs and turns around.
You raise your tone, but keep it hushed enough not to exceed the bedroom walls. “You promised that they would never get hurt! You promised that they would never get exposed to this fucking substance!”
“They haven’t … yet.”
“Yet?! Don’t fucking tell me-”
“They figured it out, okay? They heard our conversation and decided to check out the hospital for themselves. I underestimated their intelligence … and their love for you.” He sighs annoyedly. “I’m not going to let their lack of understanding break apart our family — that I have fought so hard for. I put something in their food to keep them still for a while. It’s nothing dangerous, little one. I promise you that.”
“If I knew that you were going to break your promise-”
“I had to.”
He is about to caress your cheek, but hears sounds coming from next door. One of the girls is banging on the locked bedroom door, and calling for him. Dr Kry excuses himself and gets out of the room. He walks over to Lydia’s room, where the noise is coming from. Quickly, he unlocks, finding Nadia leaning on the wall right next to the door. Her eyes are full with tears.
“What’s going on?” Dr Kry asks.
“Lydia isn’t waking up!” Nadia cries.
Dr Kry feels his body turn cold. He runs over to the bed where his other daughter is lying on her side, and he soon finds out that Nadia is right — she isn’t waking up. He shakes her, gives her gentle taps on her cheeks and lifts her up. Nothing wakes her. He has to take her to the hospital.
“Wait, where are you going?!” Nadia screams after him as Dr Kry carries her sister down the stairs. “She doesn’t want to be alone!”
“You have to stay here with mom”, Dr Kry says over his shoulder. “I’m taking care of Lydia.”
He hurries out of the house and quickly places her down in the back seat. Dr Kry’s usual forty minute drive to the hospital took only twenty five minutes this time. He picked her up in her arms and ran inside through the backdoor, and didn’t stop until their reach the room you have spent many, many months in. Dr Kry places his daughter down on the very same bed you have laid in. He placed an oxygen over Lydia’s mouth and nose, turning on the machine. He hasn’t felt this scared in a long time.
Finally, after an hour, Lydia opens her eyes with a small moan. Dr Kry hurries over to the bed and removes the mask.
“How are you feeling?” he asks her and brushes the hair out of her face.
“I feel really sick”, she whimpers.
“Do you need to throw up?”
Lydia nods. Dr Kry picks her up again and moves her into the bathroom where she hovers over the toilet for ten minutes. Dr Kry holds her hair back and grimaces sadly. He does feel bad for putting her through this, but he has to.
“There you go”, he says and puts her down on the bed again.
“Why am I here?” Lydia asks weakly.
“You weren’t responding when anyone tried to wake you up. I got worried, so I decided to take you here.”
“Am I going to die?”
Dr Kry scoffs out a smile in a weird sensation of deja-vu. He has heard that question a lot, in the exact same tone and manner, but from the generation before her.
“You’re not”, he reassures her and strokes her hair. “You know that I would never let anything happen to you.”
“Why am I feeling like this?”
“I put something in your food to make you and Nadia calm down, but you seem to have reacted badly to the substance … weirdly enough. Since you’re identical twins, i thought you’d react the same, but it seems like you are a bit more sensitive than your sister.”
“Nadia ate less than me.”
“Yeah, you might have gotten more substance in your body, which is why you feel worse. It’s going to be okay, I will not let anything happen to you.”
“But you hurt me.”
His smile drops and his hand stops stroking her hair. He knows that Lydia shares half of her mothers genetics, but he didn’t know that she would sound exactly like you. She has never heard you use these phrases, and yet Lydia has chosen the exact same wording that you have tortured Dr Kry with years ago.
“I didn’t mean for you to end up here”, Dr Kry sighs and continues to stroke her hair. “That was my fault, I admit that. However, I had to keep you and Nadia a bit sedated because of how scared you were.”
“Why did you use so much?” she whimpers.
“I was a bit shaky myself, I wasn’t meant to hurt you, Lydia.”
Lydia sighs shakily and sinks down in the mattress. She wants nothing more than to go back home, to Nadia, but at the same time she knows that if she goes back home, she will be locked in her room again. Continuing with life now that they know their father’s secret will be difficult.
“How long do I have to stay here?” she asks quietly.
“Until you’re feeling better”, Dr Kry replies and stands up. “For now, I think that you need to sleep. It’s late.”
That’s the last thing she wants to do. She has always been Dr Kry’s (not so subtle) favorite, and she has always had a preference for her father … but for the very first time, she’s afraid of him. She can’t trust him anymore, especially about her health. Being unconscious is the last thing she wants to do.
“I don’t want to”, Lydia says pleadingly. “I’m not tired … please don’t make me sleep, dad.”
Please don’t make me sleep. Your voice echoes in his head, in the exact same tone. Dr Kry knows that he did a million things wrong when he kept you here, and now he has a second chance to fix things.
“Okay”, he breathes out and sits down on his stool. “You don’t have to sleep, darling.”
Lydia gulps and looks around in the room, trying to imagine how you had felt while being here. She feels a heavy sensation over her chest, like a heavy stone. She couldn’t see the poisoned air purifier that was mentioned in the journal.
“Did mom lay here?” Lydia whispers.
“Yes”, he answers quietly.
“How long?”
Dr Kry looks down at his nails, eyes faltering. “A, uh … very long time. Many, many months.”
She starts to look around again. “Where is the air purifier?”
“It’s not here … it broke, a long time ago. I had to throw it away.”
“Do you still use that kind of thing on mom?”
“No, I don’t. Not often.”
But he has his new way to make sure you stay.
Nadia runs her hand through her hair. Her poor sister. What should she do? Dr Kry left the rooms unlocked, which means that she can move around. She drags herself into your bedroom. You look at her with wide, nervous eyes.
“Is she okay?” you ask and take Nadia in your arms.
“I-I don’t know”, Nadia responds shakily while shaking her head desperately. “She wasn’t waking up and …”
“She’s going to be okay. I know your father can all of those medical stuff … maybe a little too well.” You sigh and caress the seventeen-year old girl’s face. “It’s going to be okay.”
Nadia shakes her head. “No fucking way things are going to be okay! He’s a madman, mom.”
“I … I know.”
“We can’t stay here.”
“Where are we supposed to go, Nad? We have no car, nearest neighbor is a kilometer away and we have poison in our blood. Sweetheart, we can’t walk far.”
“Mom, we have to leave. We can’t stay here with this psychopath!”
“Nadia …”
Nadia sighs frustratedly and hides her face in her hands. Something has to work. The farthest she has seen you walk is out to the garden when they’ve had picnic evenings. You take her hand, removing it.
“Sweetheart … you know dad loves you, right?” you ask carefully. You don’t want her to hate her him, after all he is her father … but you have to let her know the truth, no more living in the shadow.
“Fucking doubt it”, Nadia mutters.
“He does. In his … own little way. But I need you to understand that he has sides that he hasn’t shown you … a-and I don’t want you to see those sides.”
Nadia’s face goes blank. You’re trying your best not to get swindled back into old memories, but thinking about that murderous side of Dr Kry brings you back to a time you much rather would want to forget.
“Mom?” Nadia asks blankly and almost shouts in panic. “Mom! What sides?”
“He … He is a very patient man, but he can't take as much as possible, so please, whatever you do … cooperate.”
“What does that mean? Mom?”
Nadia goes cold. That’s it, she thinks, they have to leave.
“Mom, get up”, she says and grabs the blanket before ripping it off. “Now. Before he returns.”
“Nad-”
“We have to try, at least. Please.”
You hesitate before getting out of bed. Nadia grabs your hand and try to pull you out of the bedroom, but everything around you seem to spin. Your entire body is heavy and aching in all the wrong places.
“Nadia, wait”, you groan. “If I’m going to move, I have to move slowly.”
“Alright”, Nadia agrees. “I’ll go get some stuff and then meet you by the stairs.”
Nadia runs to her room to collect her wallet and hoodies for herself and her sister, then runs to get your jacket. She meets you by the stairs, helps you put your jacker on and then start to lead you down. You’re terrified of falling.
“Nadia, I don’t think that this is a good idea”, you mumble and think back of your numerous escape attempts, all ending with someone losing their life.
“We have to, mom”, Nadia pleads. “I can’t leave you here.”
“What about Lydia?”
“I’ll figure something out afterwards.”
Nadia unlocks the front door and leads you out on the glass verandah. You’re filled with fear. What if you can’t walk? What if you hurt yourself? What if Dr Kry finds out? Your body won’t be able to take his anger. Besides, you have barely left the house in eighteen years — apart from a few car rides here and there — what if the world has changed to something you don’t like?
“Mom”, Nadia says slowly. “It’s going to be okay.”
“I’m terrified”, you admit.
“We will be okay.”
They start to walk along the dark countryside road. There are no streetlight this far out in the forest, but the moon lights up enough for them to see where the road is heading.
“It’s been years since I was outside last”, you say. “I think the last time I was out walking was in the garden, last summer when we had that picnic.”
“Have you ever tried to run away from dad before?” Nadia asks.
“I have”, you answer quietly. “A few times.”
“Did you ever succeed?”
“That depends on what you mean by ‘succeeding’, because I’m still here, aren’t I? But I got away a few times … the only problem was that he found me again.” You sigh, realizing that perhaps you shouldn’t have this conversation with your underage daughter. “Forget that. Where are we going?”
“We need to go to our neighbors. They have to help us.”
Nadia has only spoken to the neighbors a few times, because of how rarely they run into each other.
They only manage to walk a hundred meters before bright, beaming headlights light up in front of them. Nadia wants to flee into the forest — in case it happens to be her father behind the wheel — but can’t seem to pull you with her. The car stops and to Nadia’s horror, her father gets out.
“What the Hell are you doing?!” he shouts, sounding both angry and terrified. “Y/N!”
You freeze in your spot and seem to crawl together like a hurt dog, sounding like one too. Dr Kry runs over to you. Nadia watches in horror and starts to panic, wondering what she should do. Stay here with you and get caught in Dr Kry’s claws … or make a run for it to try to get help.
“I’m sorry”, you shriek in fear. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry-”
Dr Kry hugs your shaking body in his arms and strokes your back, hushing softly.
“I know you didn’t come up with this stupid idea”, he reassures you. “Don’t cry, my dear, I'm here now. I know this wasn't your fault. I'm not mad at you. I’ll get you back home and I'll take care of you. It’s going to be okay.”
He helps you into the front seat. You don’t fight back in the slightest. Nadia looks back at the dark forest and gulps. Her eyes glues onto something in the backseat and realizes that he has come back with her sister!
“Nadia, get in, we've had enough of these childish outbursts”, her father tells her. “Get in. Now.”
“Is she okay?” Nadia almost stutters and points at her sleeping sister.
“She’s okay. If you don’t get in now, Nadia, I’m taking them both with me and you’ll never see them again.”
His favoritism has never been clearer, Nadia thinks. She can’t leave her sister … so she gets into the backseat. Nadia wakes her sister up and caresses her cheek.
“Are you okay?” she whispers quickly. “Did he hurt you?”
“I feel okay”, Lydia whispers back. “Just … tired. I had tro throw up a lot and I think that he gave me some sleeping pills or something. I insisted on going home … so he let me.”
Nadia breathes out. She glances over at the front seat. Their father holds the steering wheel with one hand and yours with the other.
“Please don’t cry”, he wishes.
Nadia watches on in disgust.
When they get back to the white villah, Nadia pulls her sister up to her own room and lays her down on the bed while Dr Kry takes you into the master bedroom.
“Here you go”, Nadia says and tucks her in. “Are you okay? Do you need anything?”
“Some water”, Lydia says quietly.
Nadia disappears downstairs to get a glass of water. She meets her father in the stairs.
“Nadia, I’m not sure your sister will be able to leave her bed for a while”, he says warningly. “I wouldn’t try to leave, if i were you. If you do, I will take both of them with me, and you’ll never see them again.”
“Do you like to hurt your family?” she spits back. “What kind of sadist are you?”
“One to make sure my family stays with me. If you don’t want to end up in the same physical state as your sister and mother, you’re going to continue living as if everything is normal, got that? Go to school, come home, study, continue everything. No talking to anyone about this. Is that clear?”
“So everything as normal … but without Lydia?”
“Exactly.”
“Why aren’t you healing her?”
“Because I’m not going to let you, or anyone, take my family from me. Be glad that I’m still letting you live normally.”
Nadia glares at him and continues up the stairs. She holds the glass to Lydia’s mouth, watching her sip.
“What now?” she whispers.
“I’m allowed to continue living like normally … and you don’t”, Nadia says quietly. “I’m sorry.”
“But … but I don’t want to live like mom!”
“I know. I’m sorry, Lyd.”
The girl in the bed sighs sadly. Naida takes her hand and gulps.
The coming weeks seem normal. Nadia goes to school, studies, returns to the villah, but nothing is the same. Without Lydia, there’s no use in being on top. She has no one to impress anymore. Her father is dead to her, and sucking up to him makes her sick. She barely talks to her friends anymore. They’re always asking her about Lydia, and why she’s not in school anymore. Nadia can’t come up with countless excuses … it’s easier to distance herself.
Life doesn’t seem that bright and colorful anymore. Nadia can’t bring herself to be excited about things that used to interest her badly. Now, every day is a chore, something she wants to get done, until something happens … but she doesn’t know what it is. A death in the family? Someone saving them? Someone killing someone?
Nadia walks out of school, seeing her fathers white car parked outside the gates, and him inside … waiting for her.
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