#knows is strange and weird and not really a mesh with how I portray myself online

[strawberry-jackalope]

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[avengerscompound]

Running to a Standstill - 6

Running to a Standstill: A Captain America Fanfic

Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers x F!Reader

Word Count:  2015

Rating:  E

Square filled: none for this chapter

Warnings: none

Synopsis: While on the run from an unknown organization trying to take your son, you meet two super-soldiers.  While they try to help you get to the bottom of who is hunting you and your son, feelings come out and admissions are made that make your personal life even more tricky.

Chapter 6

“You're sure you’ll be okay looking after him, Bucky?” You asked, as you rifled through your wardrobe.  Bucky sat on the bed playing some kind of game on the tablet with Geo where they had to tap fish as they swam past.  “Tony took him to the lab today and it made him all hyper.”

Bucky chuckled.  “I bet it did.  But I'll be fine.  If Clint can handle looking after him, I can.”

“Clint had Natasha with him,” you argued.

“True,” Bucky said.  “And I'll have FRIDAY.”

“I'm happy to help take care of my favorite kid,” the AI added.

“Dey can weed me a stowie,” Geo said matter-of-factly.

You nodded and went right back to what you were doing.  You weren't sure what to wear.  You only had one nice dress and Steve has already seen it.  There was also the question as to why he was taking you out at all.  Things had seemed to cool off between you.  Not completely, he’d cuddle with you, and there were pecks hello or goodbye, but it wasn’t going forward how a relationship normally did.  He’d invited you out and said the two of you needed to talk and your head went racing.  Did he want to end it?  Did he have information about who was after you?  Did he want to take it to the next level?  You were panicking and you didn’t know why he was torturing you like this.

“You going on an archaeological dig in there?”  Bucky asked as you began to rifle back through the clothes you had already decided weren’t good enough.

“I don’t have anything to wear,” you complained.  You turned and looked at Bucky.  “He said we needed to talk.  Is he going to break up with me?”

“Wow,” Bucky deadpanned.  “You been hanging out with me too much?  That sounded like where my head would go.”

“Well, it’s not like we’ve been moving forward at all,” you huffed.  “Is it about the people after us?”

“No, we’d just tell you that.  We keep hitting dead ends,” Bucky said.

“I really like him, Bucky,” you implored.  It felt a little weird dumping all this on Bucky.  He was Steve’s best friend and knowing how Steve felt about him felt a little unfair.  Not that you could blame Steve for his feelings.  Bucky was sweet and sexy and had a little edge of danger about him.  It was a strange situation because as it stood, it felt like you were romantically in the exact same place with Bucky as you were with Steve, only Steve had been the one you’d been set up with.  It was like you could lean in either direction and have an actual romantic relationship, except neither was willing to go any further than they were now.   “But now it’s just like… we’re stuck in this in-between zone.  I want more but it’s kind of like he’s just humoring me now.”

Bucky looked up at you with a pained expression on his face and you knew you’d overstepped a line.  “Forget it. I’m sorry, Buck,” you said turning and going back to trying to find something to wear.

Bucky got up off the bed and moved over to you.  He seemed to hesitate for a minute before putting his hand on your hip.  It was an intimate gesture and it sent a slight shiver through you.  “Get out of your head,” he said and pulled out a pair of jeans from your wardrobe.  “Steve’s a good guy.  He’s not the kind of guy who leads people on.  You’re just in an unusual situation.  Tell him how you feel.”  He grabbed a black tank top next.  “Now, those two, your wrap, and some jewelry.  And tomorrow I’ll tell Wanda she should take you shopping.”

“I don’t -” you protested.

“No.  Wanda is our heaviest hitter,” Bucky said cutting you off.  “And she loves shopping for clothes and she’s really good at thrift shopping - so if you won’t take money, she’ll get you a bargain.”

You nodded.  You couldn't pretend that wasn’t a nice thought. The last time you’d been shopping with anyone was before Geo was born.

“Alright,” Bucky said.  “I’ll leave you to get dressed.  You okay?”

You nodded again and turned into his arms, wrapping your arms around his waist and pressing your cheek against his shoulder.  He tensed for a moment before his arms closed around you and he held you, taking a deep breath.  “Thank you,” you whispered.

“It’s alright.  I get it.  It’s hard when you don’t know who you can trust,” he said quietly.  “I know me saying it won’t help much, but you can trust Steve.  Maybe you won’t work out, but he’s not gonna hurt you like that.”

You nodded and slowly pulled back.  “Thank you,” you repeated.  “You’re really sweet you know?”

Bucky chuckled and picked up Geo.  “That is not something I’ve ever been described as.”

You got dressed in what Bucky suggested, accessorizing as best you could.  You were just starting on your hair and makeup when there was a soft knock on the door.  “Come in!” You called, assuming it was Steve wanting you to hurry up.

Instead, a young, auburn-haired woman entered.  “Hello,” she said.  She had a strong accent and a soft smile.  It took a second for it to click that this was Wanda.  The public always spoke about her like some kind of monster and the pictures you’d seen she was always using her powers, her eyes glowing red and a scowl on her face.  This young, soft-looking woman didn’t mesh at all with how she was portrayed in the media.  “I’m Wanda.  Bucky called asking if you could borrow some jewelry for your date.”

“Oh,” you said, embarrassment washing over you.  “I mean… I don’t…”

She smiled again and sat down on the bed opening up her bag.  “Don’t be embarrassed.  He was trying to help.  I was homeless for a while.  I know what it’s like just having to keep what you can carry with you.  And I have a lot of jewelry.”

She took out a selection of things and offered them to you.  “Are you sure you don’t mind?”  You asked.

“Not at all,” she replied.  “I like to share what I have.”

You picked out some brightly colored enamel bracelets, a couple of rings, and a layered beaded necklace.  She helped you with your hair and makeup and when you got up to put your shawl on she stopped you.  “Here, use this,” she said and took out a shawl from her bag that had been hand embroidered with red roses on it.

“It’s beautiful,” you said, wrapping it around your shoulders.

“Thank you,” she said.  “I made it myself.”

“Wow, you’re so talented,” you said, admiring yourself in the mirror.  Bucky had been right, the black jeans and tank top had been the perfect base to build on.  You really liked the end result.  It was casual but playful and that little bit sexy.

“You look beautiful,” Wanda said.  “Have fun.”

“I’ll try,” you said and headed out.  Buck was cooking and he smiled as he looked you over.  Steve jumped to his feet when you came out.  “Wow, you look great,” he said.

“Wow?” You teased.  “Rude.”

He laughed.  “You know what I mean.  You ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” you agreed.

“You two be good,” Bucky called as Steve offered you his arm and the two of you headed out.

“Your friends are really nice, Steve,” you said, as you rode the elevator down with him.

“Yeah,” he agreed.  “We’re kind of more family now.  I’m lucky to have them.”

You smiled and nodded.  “What did you want to talk about?  Is it the people after us?”

He shook his head.  “No.  I promise as soon as we know something, we’ll tell you.”

You frowned and let out a breath.  “What is it then?”

“We’re not going very far.  It’s a restaurant just over the road.  Why don’t we wait until we’re sitting,”  Steve suggested.

It felt like your heart only just started beating faster.  You wished he’d just get it over with and tear that band-aid off.  He led you to a modern looking restaurant across the road.  You were seated immediately at a table upstairs that looked over the rest of the restaurant.  The chairs were comfortable and large and you immediately picked up your menu and hid behind it as a way to deal with the anxiety that felt like was eating away at you.

Steve put his hand on yours and you poked your head out over the top of the menu. “I’m sorry if I made it feel like there’s something bad that was going to happen tonight.  I promise it isn’t.  I just wanted to be on a date and talk.  Like most people who are starting a relationship.”

“Oh,” you said.  “I thought… I don’t know… you weren’t …”

He chuckled.  “Not at all.  I like you a lot.  I have been worried that you living with me would make you think you owed me.  If I pushed for more you’d give it out of obligation and I don’t want that.  I want us to both be on the same page about what we want.”

You let out a breath.  “I don’t feel pressured,” you said.  “I like you a lot too.”

The waiter came over and you panicked a little.  Steve ordered a bottle of wine and as he ordered a started and entree you quickly chose what you wanted.

“I’m not used to talking, I usually just act,” Steve said when the waiter left.  “But with this kind of thing, I am so slow.  I just let the feeling grow and grow and grow and then I might kiss them.  Took two years to kiss the only people I’ve really had a romantic relationship with.”

You shook your head.  “That won’t do.”  You patted the chair to your right.  “Come here.”

He chuckled and changed seats.  “I might be a little out of practice.”

“Don’t worry,” you said.  “So am I.”

He leaned in and you bridged the distance, capturing his lips.  He hummed softly as you kissed and his hand went to your jaw, cradling your face.  His lips were soft and you flicked your tongue over them as he caressed them over yours.  He pulled back and you blinked slowly.  “That took way too long to happen,” you said.

“I’m a little slow to move,” he said. “Sorry.”

You shook your head and leaned your forehead against his.  “It was worth the wait.”

He pulled back and caressed your cheek with his thumb.  “I want you to feel comfortable with me at my house.  That it’s your place too and for us to be able to go forward with… well us,”  he explained.

“I do.  I promise,” you said.  “You’ve been nothing but a gentleman, Steve.”

He smiled.  “Then I’ll get out of my head,” he said and kissed you again.  You smiled into his lips and ran your hands up his thighs.

This one was much quicker as the waiter arrived with the wine.  You waited as Steve tried it and okayed the bottle.  When they poured you a glass you took a long sip.  “I want you to know - and this is with no expectation of anything happening - but if you’d like to share my bed…”

As Steve made the offer his face turned redder and redder and you started laughing.  “Thank you, Steve.” 

“I only mean, if you want to let Geo have his own room sometimes, you always go to bed so early,” Steve babbled.  “We don’t have to …”

“No, I know,” you assured him. “Thank you.  That would be nice.”  He smiled bashfully and took a sip from his wine.  For a guy that spent so much time-fighting evil, Steve Rogers was incredibly cute.  For the first time since the death of your husband, you were excited about a relationship.

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