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shaisuki · 6 months ago

Text

never let me go

PAIRING. HOSHINA SOSHIRO x CHUBBY! READER

CONTENT WARNINGS. angst + engineer! researcher! reader + orphan! reader + swordsmith! reader + brief flashbacks + slight spoilers + reader is obsessed with kaijus + childhood friends + insecurities + doubts + jealousy + breaking up + arranged marriage + eventual smut + fluff + talks of death + injuries+ blood + slight spoilers + body insecurities + lots of crying.

NOTES. a huge thanks to @ohikoti for helping me with this. giving me the pep talk to finish this one and for giving the time to watch the series after i express my desire to write for hoshina. more kaiju no. 8 content to come, since I desire to write for narumi and kafka.

SYNOPSIS. you made a few tough decisions in your life and one of them is to call off your engagement to soshiro even it breaks your heart and there's soshiro who won't accept the break up without proper explanation despite being away from each other. can unprecedented meetings still make a way to continue a once broken romance? was there even a romance in the first place?

gray clouds began to scatter around the area. covering the once shining bright sun and hoshina can hear the faint rumble of thunder from afar. a telltale sign that it's going to rain soon and soshiro frowns a bit. his lips in a thin line. he eyes the half eaten mont blanc in front of him. the steam rising from his cup of green tea and your favorite drink sits in front of him. it was supposedly to be a good day. considering it's his day off and yours and he's going to finally meet you once again but the weather won't allow it.

as if a weather would stop it. sunny or not as long he can spend time will you, it was fine. the vice captain of the third division sighs and then his senses is telling him that there is something bad going to happen. it settles in the pit of his gut and such warnings should not be ignored. he looks at the busy streets of tokyo. bystanders, students and salarymen walk in a normal pace. his brows furrow. is there a kaiju going to appear out of nowhere? did something bad happen to you and he hates himself for thinking of something like that. all of his worries melted when he sees you half-walking, half-running towards the cafe where he is. the dread slowly dissolves and was replaced by the same warmth he always feel when he's with you.

the bell chimes, a signal upon an arrival of a customer. he follows your every move and the way your eyes search for him in the cafe and he sees the gleam in your eyes filled with relief upon seeing him. a apologetic smile in your face when you slowly approach him in his table. sitting down, “thank you for waiting me, soshiro.” you said. smiling apologetically and hoshina's closed eyes cracked open a bit to show his crimson colored eyes.

your order arrived and was placed in front of you. the food look appetizing and was certainly a pleasant to eyes to see your favorite dessert. months cooped up in the laboratory doing research and projects for kaijus have you occupied all the time with a little to no time to yourself. you can't even savor the food you were eating and now that you're outside of the laboratory and feel the weather in your skin and the change of sceneries, it was nice for once although it hasn't been nice. how could it be when you look at the man in front of you being the happiest he can while you can't bring to say the words you wanted. the words you didn't want to say but is needed.

one thing hoshina have prided in is that he can almost read everyone like an open book and you are no exception to this. you have been so always easy to read and he was grateful for it that he was able to know and adore all your little quirks. starting from how your face lights up upon tasting upon the first bite of a food that is delicious. therefore creating a chain link reaction of you happy that will stay for the rest of the day and soshiro can look at you without getting tired.

it was a pure bliss to see you like that. a reminder that you are still the same person he loved many years ago and now. despite the circumstances that this relationship was just an arranged marriage.

today, with you sitting in front of him. he didn't need to read you. it was blatantly obvious that you were feeling under the weather or more than that. you've been mindlessly stirring your drink with the straw and the ice starting to melt. you didn't even took a bite of the food. lost in your thoughts that you didn't hear him call your name until he clears his throat. “are you okay, (y/n)?” and soshira regretted that he have to ask you that question cause he wasn't prepared to hear you say the next works when you broke out in your trance.

“i'm calling off the engagement.”

is what you said without hesitation. soshiro's smile slowly left in his lips and his closed eyes that was open since your arrival. his carmine red eyes glimmering with intensity and you swore you have seen them at the times where he's serious and deadly. you almost swallow nervously. knowing how intense soshiro can be at times.

“what's the reason for the sudden decision, (y/n)?” he asked you. bewildered at the sudden decision. you swallowed the lump in your throat before replying. “it's just i don't see any future in this union and it's not like we wanted it.” you say to him without blinking. forcing a smile and looking straight to his eyes to show that you are serious and hoped he won't catch you lying under your teeth.

vivid is the day you remember the matchmakers in the clan of his and yours decided that you and soshiro shall wed for the next years to come after soshiro joined the defense forces. it was a great match they say but to you it's nonsense. it will be bound of tradition and duty and you don't want soshiro to be tied to you.

you were an orphan. having lost your whole family from a kaiju attack and the head of the clan that have long ties with the hoshina clan came in the picture to save you. gave you shelter and a home for you to call. treated you as their daughter and with the hoshina clan came of a long history of slaying kaijus. samurais they are and they weren't if not without their swords and the clan who took you were the swordsmiths of the hoshina clan.

showing your gratitude to the people who took you, you learned to hold the hammer. holding mastery over steel and fire. crafting the sharpest of blades and later on was the career path you took at the neutralization bureau as the engineer of anti-kaiju weapons and a researcher.

if it wasn't for soshiro you wouldn't be at that kind of stuff. your friend since he found you watching him train with his bamboo sword in their backyard. your dear soshiro that you would later love.

it's for the best. you decided of it for a long time and you don't want to hurt yourself for being tied to soshiro. it pains you so much that despite the support you have given him, all the years others have invalidated him including his father. undermining his talents as a swordsman and that broke your heart to see soshiro being brought down by their ugly words.

then you received the news, soshiro got accepted at the third division. not as a troop member but the vice-captain of third division standing behind captain ashiro. the news brought you joy but there's a dull ache in your heart. soshiro's being recognized for his talent, that brought a smile to your face and he was able to show his talents. feats after feats of defeating kaijus. left and right victories. the people recognizing him as the vice-captain and his talents.

the television plays their latest victory. successfully annihilating another kaiju who decided to surface and wreck havoc at the city. there you hear the newscaster commentating that it was another accomplishment for the third division, lead by none the other captain ashiro and your vice-captain fiance. the news bringing a smile to your face that you were confused why the ink in your papers with the prototypes you have created were starting to bleed. surrounding the areas and the important details started to distort, only to realize that you were crying. the tears smudging the once clear print of your blueprints.

since when did you have become so emotional over such things? was it soshiro's achievements that you started to be like this? or is it realizing that you no longer served a purpose to be in soshiro's life aside from being his fiancee?

you didn't even realize the rift with your relationship with soshiro have gotten worst since he was transferred in the third division and your workload from extensive researches and planning of developing weapons. communication is no longer an easy feat to do. it was dragging. there were no calls in the night and even a simple text message is proven to be tasking. you understand that at this profession, sacrifices are made and that's what you and soshiro decided. what you decided.

the air felt heavy and soshiro feels like he needed a respirator to help him breath. soshiro have always know what to say but he remains silent. trying to find the right words to say. “you didn't see a future in us. is that right?” he began. soshiro's eyes began to search for any hidden truths in your face but he finds nothing. you nodded at his question. “this is sudden like i have said earlier. have you been feeling this way for a long time?” he asks you. there's a hint of pained sound in his voice and it kills you to hear him that. it was for the best you convinced yourself.

“i do.” you look at him straight in the eyes once again to see that you were dead serious about it. hoshina's gaze softens at you. “would it be selfish of me to say i wanted this relationship to work even it was an arranged one?” hoshina clenched his fist in a tight manner. “it's not, soshiro. i don't want us to waste time for a union and it's not the right time. we have our priorities.” his expression pained you and it wasn't like for him to be this vulnerable to you.

“priorities. was our priorities that different that you are willing to throw this away, (y/n)? i thought we decided that no matter where we are, we will work together. what happened to that?” his voice solemn. it took you the control to not cry in front of him. you both did talked about that but it was different.

soshiro have a purpose in his life now with captain ashiro and you're no longer needed in the picture. that's what you needed and it won't hurt no more. it would be difficult but you were tougher than what you're made of and what's a heartbreak if you can't survive it.

“it's for the best.” is what you said to yourself after leaving the cafe shortly after breaking it up with him. you don't know if you can still retain the passive expression if you stayed longer. you the gray clouds have turned into more of a darker shade and rain started pouring over the city along with your tears.

hoshina have never felt more empty. it was like you took all the colors in his life and left him as a blank canvass. the sweet taste of the caramel from his mont blanc starts to feel bitter in his tongue. the fox-eyed vice captain recalls the conversation he had with you earlier. you seem too eager to break the engagement. have he done something wrong to make you feel that way or was it a sudden change in your heart that you don't want him anymore? there's a thousand questions running in his mind and he can't answer even a single one of them and it wasn't for him to be like this. rain have started to pour outside and the temperature drops.

he can't accept that you were breaking up with him and whatever reason you have, he was going to find out even you just told him earlier. this isn't over.

the neutralization bureau never sleeps. engineers and scientist alike researches various ways to combat kaijus and using their deceased bodies as weapons. tonight, it wasn't going to be any different. you're going to work until you passed out. surprisingly you felt numb after the earlier dilemma. calm even, considering you've bawled your eyes out. pathetic for an adult like you who have called off an engagement.

before you can drown out in the large stack of blueprints needing revision from you. the intercom announced that you were needed at one of the top floors where the director of the department is located. sighing, you immediately made your way.

“have you enlisted in the defense forces?” you blinked a few times before you understand the question asked by the director of the bureau.

“u-ugh, yes sir.” you answer. finding the question rather odd cause you were a engineer and you don't see any relevance of why your director was asking you.

“how long were you in there?”

“a few months, sir. before i requested to transfer here.” he nods. you follow his movements and noticed that on his table is your file. “if i may ask sir, what's the relevance of these inquiries?”

the director hands you a document and you scanned it momentarily. it's from the jakfd. “the amount of officers enrolling have decreased significantly these past years and the amount of kaiju attacks have increased.” he began. “my point is you're a officer wasting your talents in these laboratories.”

“i appreciate it, sir but the reason why am i here is because my skills are best suited here than me being in the front lines and i'm not exactly soldier material, sir.” it always hurts when you say the truth and lying also. before being an engineer at the izumo tech, you were a officer having passed the written and physical exams. you have always known that you are going to be stuck as a sore thumb when you have joined the tanks. women in the defense forces were slim, petite, slender and any definition of being skinny in the dictionary whereas you were fat. it sticks out in everywhere and sometimes you were the center of backhanded compliments.

the defense force isn't just for you and besides you were happier here. “think about it for the meantime. the defense force needs you more than us.” the director dismisses you before you can say anything to oppose him and when just you're about to step outside of his office you heard him say it. “have some faith in yourself.”

the next week after that, you were transferred in the division one. as an officer/researcher. it won't be in vain in joining the defense force once again. you will be on the field with your expertise. you will use the missions as your research field and you were fine with the arrangement. except for captain narumi who didn't hold much about you. straight up calling you useless in the defense force not until you have beaten him on his own game. his field of expertise of course. that shut him up and he treated you as his equal since then.

“shinonome-san, where are you taking me?” you said helplessly as one of the platoon leaders, shinonome drags you from your workshop where you used to hole yourself up. “to the field. the third division is here and captain narumi is looking for you.” she explained coolly. you gulped when you hear the third division is going to be present at the fields. it means it's either captain ashiro or your ex-fiance will be there and you hoped that it will be the former and you were proven wrong as you hear bickering.

“hoshina! what the hell you think you're doing here!?” captain narumi's voice echoed. menacing it is and annoyed from the sound of it. you hear another voice. “oho, narumi. didn't see you there.” the vice-captain says in a mocking tone and that seems to spur captain narumi in his foul mood at the vice-captain of the third division. “of course you didn't, you fox-eyed bastard!” he retaliates and before hoshina can piss him more with some remark, his eyes cracks open upon seeing you being dragged by a platoon leader.

“captain, (y/n)'s here.” shinonome informs him and it looks like a switch have been flipped when narumi sees you. “here's the new recruit.” he mutters and it took a whole of control for hoshina to not punch the living daylights out of narumi from how close he was to you and what a surprise to see you here in a another division and he wishes you were in the third division so he can keep an eye for you.

it didn't help that narumi is openly flirting with you. his arm draped around your shoulder and the other is holding your hand to inspect it. “you're researching those kaijus again.” narumi comments. “it's my job and i've been doing research about them.” you mutter softly and soshiro melts at what he heard. always the one who obsessed upon those creatures and he find it endearing except for the closeness you're having with that lazy bastard.

a vein popped in soshiro's and it was close to bursting if narumi was doing it intentionally when he intertwined his hands to yours. eliciting a shocked reaction from you. finding the situation awkward and inappropriate you quickly pulled your hand from his and stuffing it in the pockets of your uniform. dismissing yourself you went away from them. clearly embarrassed. he closes his eyes and went back to face narumi and his rowdy members.

soshiro wanders through the halls of one of the compounds of the ariake base. he couldn't miss a night without training his skills and he was directed to a training room. he finds one of the library doors is open and it wasn't any different at the third division for someone to stay late at night. he just plans to walk by and he would be in the training room but to his surprise when he took a peek at the library, he sees you, sleeping. your laptop open and various of books are stacked in the table where you rest.

hoshina unzips his jacket to cover you. he can get it to you for later after he finished his training and maybe he can take you to your room or his if you remained asleep. just as he was to drape his jacket around you. you stirred in your sleep. slowly waking up and muttering something incoherent.

“soshiro?” you mumbled. raising your head from where it rested moments ago. yawning, you stretched your arms and you were now fully awake.

the vice-captain glances at your laptop and he noticed you were creating a new type of weapon, not just any weapon. a dual blade sword. similar to the one he uses. “oh.” you gasp. closing the laptop in a speed that it looks like you have been caught watching inappropriate. “i assume it's for me.” he started and you nodded in reply. “always have been when it comes to swords.” you confessed. gathering the papers you have been scribbling with notes. soshiro interrupted you. “we need to talk.”

“can we have it tomorrow?”

“no. you're avoiding me.”

“i'm not.”

“yes, you are and you're not being good at it.”

“soshiro, it's late.” you reason but it was possible to convince him. “you can go after we have this conversation.”

“what do you need to know?”

“why did you call off our engagement?”

you sigh, “i already told you about it, soshiro.” hoshina refuses to accept it. “it's not an explanation and suddenly you're here in the first division.”

“they wanted me back in the defense force even though i didn't wanted it but it's the only way.”

“the way of what?”

“can you stop asking me questions!?” you half screamed, whispered. irritated at his questions and it wasn't like for soshiro to be like this. “i won't stop until i know the reason why my fiancee suddenly departed her previous job and to find you here.”

“i'm not your fiancee anymore. i broke it off and it's none of your business.” you hissed. grabbing your laptop to get away from him but he stopped you from doing so. “answer me, (y/n).” he orders you. trapping your soft jaw in his hand and forcing you to look at his eyes. you hated yourself from how weak you turn to when met with his eyes.

“it's the only way i can be of use.” you began to sob. your tears trickling down your cheeks. “i was happy when you found your place at captain ashiro's side. i thought that it was fine but the moment you started there, the distant you have become. i understand it. i can't be selfish. i don't want to hinder you when you're there in the front lines looking so contented, fulfilled.”

it never felt so good to say the words you've been bottling away but the guilt that followed it was unbearable. you never sounded so selfish and greedy but it was the truth. “why you didn't tell me that you have been feeling this way for so long, (y/n)? i thought we promised that were going to be honest to each other.” his grip loosened. cupping your face in his hand. he didn't know you were feeling those ugly emotions. “i'm just me. your fiancé. your fiancé from a arranged marriage. not what you wanted and not what you needed. it's not my place to tell you things, soshiro.”

soshiro leans down. wiping the tears in your face. “in arranged marriages...” he began. “it serves a purpose. our duty to our families. honoring the tradition. and our union fulfills it all. the day they announced our engagement, i am happy it was you that i am engaged to. i know our union is arranged but please don't treat it as one that you would put your feelings aside for mine. you're more than my fiancee. you're everything that i could ever want and need. you're mine.” he says before kissing your forehead and soshiro thought that it's been so long since he had done this. “and i'm sorry that i hurt you. i won't forgive myself for that.”

“don't say that, soshiro.” you softly mutter. daring to meet his dark red eyes with your own. you see your reflection in his eyes. a being who have taken the form of insecurity. an ugly entity who pushed people for her own selfishness and soshiro can see you for what you really are.

he stays in the same position before you stopped him what he's currently doing to you. “it's late. i believe we have smoothed things over.” you say and hoshina allowed you to stand up. letting you continue what you were about to do earlier before you have talked about it.

the paper's thin and despite the countless of documents you've handled. your finger getting cut by the sharp edge of a paper is mostly likely to happen and it sure did. a sharp pain travels throughout your body, making you wince as blood surfaces up through the split skin.

the distress brought the younger hoshina sibling to your side. holding your hand and inspecting the wound in your finger. there's nothing serious about it except for the crimson color of your blood oozing at the pad of your finger. “it's nothing —”

a silent gasp slips past your lips. without warning soshiro grasps your finger before taking a lick. the sensation stinging if it wasn't for the comfort of soshiro's tongue lapping at your blood. it didn't help that you were in a compromised position with him. it offered no comfort of escape. the cold table with your belongings and soshiro have blocked your way.

it's a sight to burn in his memory at this very moment. watch your flustered expression and the way you tensed up from his ministration. your blood it tastes like iron. the same as his own with the aftertaste of rust. his canine-like tooth nibbles on the soft flesh of your finger while his tongue swirls around your digit.

whatever emotions you were having earlier didn't compare to this. hoshina's sultry gaze emitting from those eyes staring at you and observing every move you partake. you find it difficult to avoid his gaze. leaving you flustered and even in the dimness of the room, you can make every muscle of his straining in that black compression shirt of his. a heat of desire pooling in the pit of your stomach spreading throughout your body.

cold. your skin is cold against his warmer ones and he's surprised that you weren't even shivering in the coldness of the room. caressing the roundness of your cheek with his thumb. tracing the outline of your lips and feel the softness of it.

you were the image of what you are and this closeness will be the end of his. every fiber of his being screaming to just kiss you and that's what he did. letting instincts to take over. he didn't kiss you out of the blue. just brushed his lips to yours. the same he did many nights ago under the roof of his house away from the eyes of the others. the night where your engagement to his announced.

tender and slow when he pressed his own to yours. “soshiro, no.” you said when he broke the kiss and to only to do it again. you hold his wrist to stop him from going further but your actions betray you too. your lips following his and soshiro smirks at this but decided not to tease you. “we're nothing anymore. i broke up with you...” explaining the circumstances and it's not right to be this close to him. not when you two are no longer acquainted with each other. you both are merely colleagues. “i didn't agree with it though, we're still engaged unless you have feelings for a another man.” he murmurs to your lips. his eyes turning into more of a warning. showing such intensity and he maybe result in your murder if you find yourself falling for a man that is not him.

he kisses you again. starting in a slow manner and hoshina can hear the gasps and the silent whines leaving your lips. muffled in his own. his fingers find the plushness of your skin under your shirt. rubbing the skin with his fingers. the coarseness of his calloused hands are a welcome sensation to your skin. whereas it provided security and warmth spreading throughout your whole body.

there aren't any words to speak when both of your mouths are occupied on the feeling of each other.

“soshiro...” he hears you say his name and he smiles at you. showing his canines and he find the soft flesh of your buttocks. grabbing it to raise your upper body and therefore placing you in the table.

his ruby-colored eyes seems to burn more with color when looking at you. his strong, smart girl. always the one who sets aside her feelings for others. the woman of his. forging and engineering weapons for him. he likes to think that it's always for him. your hands gains the familiar thickness of callous but retains the softness he's familiar with. endearingly adorable. his (y/n). his (y/n) that he have from a arranged union. his (y/n) that he loves and hoshina wouldn't admit that he have the shortcomings when it comes to you and it's been grave since you have told him.

a tug on his shirt and hoshina hasn't been able to take his eyes off you for more than a second. your loose white shirt and the shorts you're wearing have been growing on him. desperate to take it off but he's not an animal to completely strip you off with the cold temperature dropping.

it's been so long since you both have been intimate and hoshina hasn't been doing so well after it. always thinking the reason of the separation and he's one to be blamed for it.

he pulls you closer. his hand on the small of your back until it descended in the waistband of your short to tug it and take it away. leaving you bare for him to see. he have pried your thighs open and slotted his body between them. his cock twitching inside of his pants and in desperate need of relief by your fat pussy.

soshiro groans. he already have discarded his pants and the tip of his cock rubs between the slit of your pussy. making your back arch and without warning, he swiftly enters the hole of your pussy with his cock. making you cry out and hug him. pulling him closer to you. “it won't be long, baby. i just need you to cum for me.” is what he said. planting his palm to the cold surface of the table. bucking his hips and beginning to thrust. starting as gentle and tender as he started to get impatient.

you're too good wrapped around him and it wasn't good that you're chanting his name. “more, soshiro. more...” your hips meeting his thrusts and even if you deny him that you two aren't no more, it's evident that your body misses him just like you do and he's also in the same position as you minus the denial. he won't let you go.

soshiro glance at the door still open and how fortunate for someone to walk on you both and see how good he's fucking you. still he dislike where he's making love to you. it should be on his private quarters but certain matters didn't apply for it.

you continue to call his name. trying to quiet down but it's hard to ignore how his cock rubs all over and hitting your sweet spots that it's already making your legs quake with need for release and the familiar know getting tighter in your abdomen. he seems to notice not cause he's now holding your plush waist to get deeper, faster.

he sees the way your eyes flutter and your lips parted. he wasted no time crashing his lips into yours. engulfing it with such need that it's bruising and his tongue is making territory inside your mouth. he just wanted to kiss you. he always liked kissing you and he wants it to continue until you're both cumming.

moaning in the kiss, soshiro knows you're not going to last and he is too. a low growl sound comes from his throat when he feels you have cummed around his cock and he buries his cock to the hilt before spilling his load inside you. making sure that there aren't a drop wasted and you have took them well like you always have.

he was still kissing you and you retuning the gesture until your highs have come down. he hears you hiss as he pulls his softening cock. after cleaning himself and you. he notices how your eyes are getting droopy. he must have tire you out in which he have no qualms for. he scoops you in his arms before bringing you to his personal quarters. he kisses your forehead and you hear him say something but you're too tired to know it and argue with him so you sleep on the arms of the man you feel safest the most.

when you wake up, you weren't in your bed. a heavy arm is flung into you. wrapped around your waist with a grip that have no intention of letting you go. then you notice a new weight on your finger. it's a ring. you gently turned around without waking him up and laid still. “no need for it, soshiro.” you softly mutter to his still sleeping figure.

however you appreciated the gesture. it was like he's telling you that he's not ever to going to let you go and that's enough for you.

#♱ ⋮ shai's works⸝⸝#chubby reader #kaiju no. 8 #kaiju number 8 #kaiju no.8 x reader #kn8 x reader #kn8 b side #soshiro hoshina #hoshina soshiro x reader #hoshina x reader #hoshina soshiro smut #kn8 fluff #kn8 angst #anime x reader #anime x chubby reader #kaiju no.8 x chubby reader #anime smut #anime angst #anime fluff

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jjkamochoso · 2 months ago

Note

Helooo sorry to barge in!

I was hoping maybe you do a creation of one of Kaiju no 9 of making humans but he left her thinking she's a waste of creation.

The JAKDF found her though she was dead (inside a pod that contains some water and oxygen mask for humans to breathe)

Then the container suddenly opens and Hoshina out of reflex catches fem reader.

These might be time consuming so sorry about that but you can take your time of wanting to do this but even if you ignore it I don't mind. Ok! Thankyouuu for your time!!🤝🏻✨✨✨

Hello and welcome to my blog!! Thanks so much for this request, this is such a cool idea!! I’m sorry it took so long but I very much appreciate your patience😁🫶 I hope you love this!!

Too Cute to Be a Kaiju

Angst, Fluff

Soshiro Hoshina x f! reader

Warnings: description of medical paraphernalia (oxygen masks, tubing attached to body, etc.)

You felt… incredible. Invincible, even. Of course, that was after the excruciating pain that had been inflicted upon you for the past who knows how long. You couldn’t remember the last time you felt sunshine on your skin or what a breath of fresh air tasted like, but you also couldn’t remember what it was like to feel so powerful.

And then everything went black.

Kaiju No. 9 had been quiet for the past month.

Too quiet.

Soshiro Hoshina frowned at the news, or lack thereof, being reported to him about No. 9’s whereabouts by a soldier tasked with the unfortunate job of being at the brunt of the JAKDF’s finest’s frustrations.

“…and there was nothing to report there either. Our operations team did report a sudden spike in fortitude levels near an abandoned cave, but the excavation team didn’t make note of any evidence of No. 9 having been there-”

“Hold on. Where was that?” Soshiro interrupted, his bored expression turned immediately interested.

“Where was what, sir?” the solider replied, the shake of nerves overtaking her voice.

“The spike in fortitude levels. Where was that at?”

“At… at a cave, sir,” she swallowed thickly.

Soshiro fought the urge to grab her by the collar and shake the answer out of her, instead choosing to grin sarcastically.

“I got that part. Any idea which one?”

“Um…” She flipped through the pages of reports in her hands with fervor. “Here, sir.”

He took the paper from her outstretched hand. A singular red dot stood out on the black and white map, its location just outside Third Division’s city boundaries.

Thanking her, he handed it back. “Did anyone follow up on this irregularity?”

She shook her head no and Soshiro’s eyebrows furrowed.

“That’s all. Thank you.”

“But the report, sir, I’m not done-”

“Are there any sightings of 9 in there?”

“No sir.”

He shrugged. “Then I’m good. I’m releasing you from report reading duty to go do something more worthwhile.”

The soldier, albeit confused, saluted him and walked out of his office. Rubbing his face with his hands, Soshiro took in a breath.

Looks like I’m going spelunking.

A few days, tons of arguing with higher ups, and plenty of paperwork later, the vice captain of the Third Division found himself facing the depths of a cave on the coast outside Tokyo. He was allotted two soldiers to go with him in case something went awry, both of which were currently arguing over who had to enter the suspicious looking cave first. While they were occupied with each other, Soshiro pulled out his tablet and began to measure fortitude levels in the surrounding area. For several minutes, the reading stayed at zero, signaling that nothing of concern was residing there.

Maybe it was a fluke.

Without warning, the fortitude level readings pulsed with numbers fluctuating between 1.4 and 7.6. Soshiro’s eyes blitzed away from the screen and began to scan for an immediate threat, yet he found none. As quick as it began, the levels went back down to zero.

“Have you two stopped bickering and figured out which one of you is heading in there first?” Soshiro addressed the squabbling soldiers.

“Since you’re in charge, sir, we think you should,” one of them said after a moment’s pause, causing the other to nod along eagerly. Soshiro sighed and entered into the depths, his fingers itching for the safety of his blades.

The cave was like a labyrinth; it would be a feat for Soshiro’s small team to be able to retrace their steps to the entrance when they were done exploring. Keeping an eye on the fortitude readings, there was no change while walking the first few miles of the underground tunnel. All of a sudden, like before, the tablet alerted Soshiro to readings ranging from 3.3 to 8.5. He pressed on, his soldiers cowering behind their vice captain like scared children. The pathway of the cave started to narrow and Soshiro felt his heart pound with unease. Before long, he was struggling to fit through the tunnel. With the little light he had emanating from his flashlight, he saw that the tunnel has been damaged by some sort of explosion, leading the walls to cave in on themselves.

As if someone—or something—had been trying to hide what they were up to.

There’s something here. I know it.

With one final squeeze over fallen rocks, Soshiro and his team were rewarded with a change of view. They had come upon a wide open space, with stalagmites gracing the surrounding areas. Sticky air permeated this part of the cave and Soshiro’s lungs struggled to work in the thick atmosphere.

“What is this place?” piped up a squeaky voice.

“We’re here to find that out,” murmured Soshiro, his flashlight lighting up the walls to gain a sense of his surroundings. “Take a look around and report back if you find something.”

“I found something!” yelped the other solider, his flashlight quivering, casting moving shadows on the…

The…

What exactly was that?

Soshiro inched closer, wanting to investigate. There was no way that was what he thought it was. As he moved in and realized what he saw, his eyes widened in shock. Standing tall in the middle of the cave was a giant tube filled with some sort of liquid. Floating inside the tube was a woman, a thin white gown covering her body and an oxygen mask covering her mouth. There were various small tubes and cords running off of her, but nothing seemed to be in working order.

She couldn’t be the source of the wavering fortitude levels…

Could she?

Against better judgement, Soshiro approached the tube. This discovery, no matter what it was, was going to be extremely important. It didn’t matter if this was a breakthrough for the JAKDF or just the local police force.

He was going to get her out of here.

“Is she a Kaiju, sir?” asked the soldier who found the woman first.

“I don’t see how she could be,” replied Soshiro, circling the tube, “but this is very strange.”

“She’s too cute to be a Kaiju,” remarked the other soldier and Soshiro glared at him, the soldier now averting his eyes in embarrassment.

Soshiro studied the woman for a good while, his hand clasped under his chin in thought. She must be dead since there was no way she could’ve survived down there with no food or water, suspended in water like that.

“What happened to you, hm? Were you experimented on by some sort of freak?” Soshiro wondered aloud. His tablet alerted him to a change in fortitude levels but he had no time to check it.

The pod burst opened.

Without even having to think about it, Soshiro caught the woman’s body with ease as she was flung out of the now opened pod door, water pouring out and soaking the both of them. Soshiro was thoroughly confused by what brought that on, but he had barely a moment to think before the woman’s eyes fluttered open and his tablet recorded no more instances of rising fortitude levels.

“Are you alright?” he asked, still holding her close to his chest.

“I… don’t know,” you croaked out, your voice rusty from disuse.

“Shh, don’t hurt yourself. I’ve got you, okay?” Soshiro reassured you, his firm grip a comfort on your aching arms. You didn’t seem like a Kaiju, going off of your looks, but there was no way you were 100% human. Your skin was much too cold for you to not be shivering, nor was it pruny from being suspended in water for who knows how long.

“Hey, dumb and dumber. Disconnect her from the tube, would ya?”

The soldiers, frozen in surprise at the alive woman in front of them, broke out of their stupor and pulled at the cords, unplugging you from your container.

“What’s your name, darling?” asked Soshiro, trying his best to keep a calm demeanor to get you to talk.

“I… I don’t…”

Your head felt like it was splitting in two. All of your memories were hazy. You couldn’t remember your real name, where you were from, or how you got down there in the first place. The only thing that was clear in your mind were the experiments done on you and a sinister voice calling you disobedient and a waste of creation. You didn’t want to think about your past anymore—you wanted to focus on the present, with the soft touch of a handsome man quelling your worries like you never had them to begin with. This man, who was holding you with such fondness, too much for a stranger like you, you thought, was making your chest pound like your heart would burst through at any time.

“Hey, it’s alright. Don’t stress over it. We’ll get you out of here and cleaned up, okay?”

The man gestured at who you assumed were his team. You didn’t care to look at them; you couldn’t take your eyes off the man with the bowl cut.

He looked very familiar.

“You… I know you…” you declared, staring into his bright purple irises, trying to place where you knew him from.

“Do you? I’m on the news a lot, you know.”

He flashed you a smile, his fangs barely peeking over his lips, but it was enough for the memory to come rushing in faster than the water rushed out of your pod. You flung yourself out of his grasp like his skin had burnt your own, putting a fair amount of distance between the two of you.

“Vice Captain Hoshina,” you called out, your breathing heavy as you grappled between restraining yourself and giving into your monstrous urges, “I was going to be sent to kill you.”

Soshiro only raised his eyebrows at your words, seemingly not worried about anything of what you just told him. He sauntered over to you without a care in the world, his goofy grin still plastered on his face.

That’s too bad. She really is cute.

Taglist: @kana-daydreams

#soshiro hoshina x reader #soshiro hoshina angst #soshiro hoshina x reader fluff #soshiro hoshina fluff #hoshina soshiro x reader #soshiro hoshina #soshiro hoshina x female reader #soshiro hoshina x you #kaiju no 8 x reader #kaiju no. 8 #kn8 x reader #kn8 fluff #kn8 angst #hoshina x reader

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milkbobatyun · 3 months ago

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dont cry, my darling

pairing: soshiro hoshina x fem!reader

genre: angstober, events

summary: somehow, hoshina soshiro was always the reason for your tears

word count: 1k

a/n: i liked soshiro first, before i even met him (in the anime) i liked him. YOU HATE HIM COMPARED TO HOW MUCH I LIKE HIM ୧(๑•̀ᗝ•́)૭ (pls smw get this reference) literally such a simp for him, i hope this fic does him justice

the hospital room was illuminated by the watery moonlight, filtering through the paper thin curtains covering the windows on the far side of the room. the steady metronome of the heart monitor was the first thing soshiro heard as he woke up from his sleep.

he stared listlessly up at the grey ceiling, breathing in the antiseptic smell that lingered in the room. as he regained consciousness, he was aware of a dull ache of pain throbbing through his body, white bandages wrapped around his chest. perhaps he over-exerted himself in the battle against number 10.

he lay still in the comfort of the bed, eyes scanning around the room. it seemed that the rest of the patients had long since recovered from their wounds, the rest of the beds were empty.

a tight grip encased his hand, where it rested beside him. turning his head, he saw your form, slumped onto the bed, head resting against your arm, as you slept.

the shadows haunting underneath your eyes told him of your worry, how long you had stayed awake, waiting for him. your hair was messy mane around your head, though it didn’t take away from your beauty.

moonbeams smiled upon your face, their cheerful light catching on the dried tear stains running down the apples of your cheeks.

he sat up with an effort, a quiet grunt echoing throughout the empty room. he lovingly admired your sleeping form, his usual close-eyed smile morphing into one of sadness. it seemed that he was always the reason for your tears.

MEMORY I

it had been your fifth birthday, and your second year of moving into his neighbourhood.

that day, you had excitedly knocked on the hoshina residence’s front door, both hands eagerly clutching the sparkly pink handbag you just received from your parents.

you waited in anticipation at the front door, hopping from foot to foot in excitement, eyes sparkling when you hear the door slide open.

with your best manners, you greeted soshiro’s father, who had opened the door. in the shadows of the foyer, soshiro lingered, peeking and listening in. he should’ve been practicing his swordart, but you were more important. for you, he would drop everything to keep you company.

“good morning, mr hoshina!” you beamed up at him, a gap where your two front teeth should’ve been. “it’s my birthday today! i was wondering if… if soshiro could come and celebrate with me.” you blinked up at him, hope shining from your face.

his father had rumbled something in response. from behind the door, soshiro watched your eyes well with tears, your bottom lip trembling with the effort of holding them back.

the sun glistened, light reflecting off of the salty droplets as they fell.

it was only after your fervent pleading and watery puppy dog eyes that his father had finally relented, allowing his son to spend his day with you, though he had strictly ordered soshiro complete 30 extra sets of exercises the next day.

to soshiro, it was all worth it, just to see you smile.

MEMORY II

the next time he had made you cry was merely a few months after your seventh birthday.

the two of you were playing around in your backyard, flying your kite. a rogue wind snatched up your kite, throwing it into the intricate branches of the peach tree. your face fell almost immediately, lips turning down into a frown.

when he caught sight of your gloomy face, soshiro immediately sprung into action. he scampered up the tree like a monkey, carefully untangling the kite from the grasp of the tree.

yet, as he was climbing back down, his foot slipped, causing him to land in an undignified heap at the foot of the tree. the rough bark of the tree had scraped at his knee, a small river of blood leaking.

such a sight made you feel guilty. soshiro had gotten himself injured trying to help you. as you dabbed at his wound with an alcohol-soaked cotton, tears leaked from your eyes, while you repeatedly mumbled apologies.

soshiro only gave you a wide-smile, gently pinching your cheeks between his fingers, as he teased you.

“what a crybaby!” he laughed, smile stretching from ear to ear. “smile for me!”

through your tears and blurry vision, you gave him a wobbly smile.

MEMORY III

when soshiro had left for the defence force, you had spent a whole week, holed up in your room, fuming with anger.

how dare that bowlcut prick not tell you he was leaving and had signed up for the defence force? if this idiot had thought that he could just up and leave without a word to his girlfriend, he should be prepared to catch some hands, or slippers, when he returned.

months passed and you didn’t hear a peep from him. as the date of your 1 year anniversary grew closer, you slowly began to lose hope.

as you trudged home from work, kicking a loose stone as you went by, you quietly cursed soshiro under your breath, the string of curses growing as you neared your home.

suddenly, a large bouquet is thrust under your nose. looking up, you see none other than the devil himself, mr hoshina soshiro, standing and grinning, covered in bandages and his defence force uniform thrown over it, holding a comically large bouquet of flowers, with your favourite snacks stuffed between some of flowers.

tears pooled in your eyes as your tired brain finally registers that after months of no contact, here he was, your boyfriend, in the flesh, with a cheesy grin on his face.

seeing your bottom lip tremble, soshiro panicked, engulfing you in a hug as your salty tears soak into his uniform as you sobbed complaints about how you thought he died.

soshiro is brought back to the present when he hears you stir, mumbling something in your sleep.

reaching behind him, he plumps up one of the numerous pillows cushioning him, before gently removing his hand from your grasp, lifting your head and nestling a pillow underneath.

he quietly slipped his hand back into yours. catching sight of your empty left hand, he brainstormed what type of ring you would like, thumb brushing over your knuckles.

he hoped, the next time he made you cry, it would be tears of joy.

taglist (open): @leehanscorydora, @nfekwefdskldm (FELLOW SOSHIRO SIMP !!)

∧,,,∧ ( ̳• · • ̳) © curated with love by milkbobayun 2024 / づ ♡

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miyakiwiii · 7 months ago

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【We were too close to the stars】

=HOSHINA SOSHIRO

TW: ANGST,DEATH,SMOKING,HOSHINA CANT GET OVER YOUR DEATH. (Lmk if i missed anythin'!) +this is bad [ALSO, GN!READER]

Oh, how he missed you.

Everything, your scent, your warmness, and your kindness to him.

The feel of your touch still lingers in his memories, it was like a spring of flowers being held by your arms

Oh how he missed that feeling, your kisses, the way you laughed, and the way when you ran, he chased you.

It was not long ago after you had been reported dead to him, his heart was shattered by the news of you having

'Unknown' cirucumstances of death

"What, ya' got to be kiddin' me right?" I ask, voice cracking at the last three words i had spoke, denial had started to takes over me,i gripped my had and the other had gripped the telephone that was pointed to my right ear.

"Im so sorry vice president hoshina. But im afraid it is true." The woman says on the telephone.

A dull and pained feeling slowly filled me.

It was guilt that had filled me.

I gripped the white telephone tightly and say, "al...alright." i said, putting the telephone down to its place, shutting the telephone call down.

" I was too fuckin' late." I said, gripping both of my broad shoulders tightly, trying not to cry for your sake.

"Never cry again? For me?" They said to me smiling warmly infront of me.

It was my off-duty and we forced me to go to a carnival, they said it was for 'something.'

"Ya' sure, promise i can fufill that sugar!" I say, i held her hand and kissed Their cheek

They laughed at me, pulling my hand. Their features were blooming under the warm sun.

It was ethearal, heavenly even.

"Come on soshiro! Lets buy cotton candy!" They asked, looking at me with a wide smile.

"Oh, uh ya' sure!" I agree. They ran when i said 'sure.' Running to the cotton candy maker and buying it.

They got the pink one, and she gave me the blue one.

"Your gonna pay." They laughed mischiveously. "I dont mind" i laugh to her, flashing her my signature fanged smile.

Now there i was.

In the rooftop, smoking, i let out a puff of smoke as it spreads into the air, looking at the stars, it reminds me of how you shined when we first met.

Being the most lively partner i have ever met.

I huff the smoke once again, smilling at the sky.

'[Name.], it woulda' be [name] hoshina if i wasnt late.' I say in my mind, gripping the ciggar stick in my fingers.

"I told you to quit smoking didnt i?" They put their hands on their waist, looking at me with a dissapointed look.

"Well, well.. sorry then sugar. Im gonna' stop it, i promise ya'!" I say, agreeing to their words.

"Well you better." They say, taking the ciggar bud and throwing it on the ground.

"Hey!" I say, looking at them.

"Now now, lets go hommmmmmeee!" They pulled me by my hand once again.

"I didnt even stop, didnt i?" I say, laughing while still looking at the stars, hoping for an answer but there was none.

I put the ciggarette bud down, now gripping my shoulders, printing cresent marks onto my skin.

I spoke, tears threatening to fall once again, i try to hold it but it was no avail.

Tears started to drop onto my lap, it spilled and spilled as my eyes were getting sore.

I spoke brokenly while in the process of letting the tears fall.

"Im sorry i didnt protect you."

Im bad at writing angst, but it was worth a try😎‼️‼️‼️‼️

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readerforexiao · 5 months ago

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𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐆 | 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ

⌗ Hoshina Soshiro x Reader | Angst | tw: blood w mild gore, death, events and context unclarified

⌗ “Sometimes, longing for what we’ve lost drives us to madness, and as we near insanity, we begin to question what is real and what is merely a figment of our imagination.”

The sky was immersed in a burnt orange hue as crimson droplets pattered against your cheeks and hands, relentless in their descent. A burning sensation was left in its wake, but a soul too focused on the silhouette that stood bare to notice. His features were carved into your memories like the lingering effects of a nightmare that persisted even after waking.

He stood beyond your reach, forever beyond your reach. But within a blink of an eye, he abruptly appeared closer until the only thing you could focus on was the expression laid upon his face, glitched and unsettling.

The tips of his fangs grazed his bottom lip as his eyes bore into yours, wide and enchanting. And the longing in your heart surged with recognition of the one it had loved and yearned for so long, like a child who beamed with excitement at the sight of a new gift.

You clutched your shirt and willed your heart to calm down, to be cautious, to stay strong and wary, but it rebelled, crying out to him in silent tears.

"Your heart," He spoke, standing at mere arms length, his voice a haunting echo of the man whom confessed his love for you every given chance.

And how horrible that it sounded just like him, with that low timbre and subtle husk— a tone you knew only to be reserved solely for you. It sent a shiver down your spine and pulled you in even before you fully realized it, all because you wanted it to be true, wanted this lie of him to be true. The man you will love until your heart could love no longer.

You raised your head slowly, afraid to confirm what you already knew. And when your eyes met, it was like time folded in on itself and the past came rushing forward to meet the present.

There he is, just as you remembered but with an air of something unspoken. In appearance he was nothing short of the man you remembered. But it was also his eyes that gave him away.

He was now Soshiro. He was not your lover. Not your husband. He was nothing but a remnant of Soshiro.

Your Soshiro.

He took a step closer until the space between you shrunk with every heartbeat. Your eyes closed for just a brief second when a sharp tug pulled at your chest, and you doubled over in pain as blood rose to restrict your air flow.

Fear and confusion twisted your features as you looked down and saw a hand buried deep in your chest.

Your voice, strained and teetering on the edge of heartbreak, broke free with its cries crashing over you in relentless waves of agony.

"It calls to me," He claimed somewhat intrigued, as if the concept of a beating heart was lost in his understanding.

The subtle tilt of his head after he had spoken brought you to tears, even more than the pain of having your heart ripped from your chest. His blank stare trailed to his hand as it vanished into your body. His face was marked by an emptiness, holding a look of almost innocent bewilderment. It was as if he was completely unaware of the gravity of the moment, his curiosity and detachment deepening the emotional impact.

Yet the only thing you could think of was that familiar, maddening tilt of his head, a habit so ingrained it seemed insignificant. It shattered you because it was a part of him, something so small and personal that you had only fully noticed out of your undying love for him.

This betrayal could never falter your devotion to him, not when you knew the man standing before you was but an empty shell of his true self.

You would call his name affectionately even as bile glogged your throat. You would hold his hand even if stained with your blood. You would cup his face and stare into his eyes no matter how vacant and distant they were, pressing your lips to his as if sin could be forgiven.

"Soshiro," You smiled, tasting metal as blood dripped from the corners of your mouth.

"Soshiro" He repeated robotically, fingers twitching as it gripped your pulsing heart and it may as well have given in right there.

He didn't even know his own name.

You clutched his forearm, but your legs gave way and you collapsed into his chest with a tormented scream as his hand pushed through you further while his face still vacant and distant loomed above you, the incongruity between his unnerved demeanor and the excruciating pain he was inflicting only served to heighten your anguish.

You could feel his heartbeat against your cheek, steady but detached, while yours grew fainter.

"At least..." You clung to your last moments, hoping he would hear your final words, "I... get to die in... your arms"

The life slowly drained from your body, darkness welcoming you. And your soul flickered on its last remnants.

It was peaceful— more than you could have ever asked for.

#hoshina soshiro x reader #hoshina soshiro #hoshina x reader #soshiro hoshina #kaiju no. 8 #kaiju no. 8 x reader #kaiju no. 8 x you #kn8 x reader #kn8 x you #kn8 anime #kn8 angst #Kaiju no. 8 angst #hoshina #soshiro hoshina x reader #anime angst #angst #anime fic #kn8 fanfic #kaiju no. 8 fanfic

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szqnxi · 5 months ago

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|| Unrequited

Reno Ichikawa x reader (angst)

It wasn't a secret to the whole force that you were Soshiro Hoshina's property, and his alone.

Reno wishes you weren't.

"You look troubled" Iharu said, setting his chopsticks down while looking at him. "Is something wrong?" he asked, getting the attention of the bickering Kafka and Shinomiya beside him.

Reno shook his head. "Everything is fine" he lied. "I was just thinking about what training I should do to increase my combat power" he said dismissibly not wanting to discuss what's going on in his mind. He was scared that he might accidentally say something he'd regret, especially since it involved you.

You were completely unaware of the feelings he had been suppressing about you. However, regardless of what he might say, he knew the outcome would remain the same. You saw him only as a friend, and that's all you would ever see him as.

He knew these feelings weren’t right, but damn, it was difficult to control himself. The way you looked, the tender smile you would give him whenever he did something good, the way you encouraged him with kind words before each mission, your loving personality - it was all too much for him to handle. He just couldn’t help how he felt about you.

He had been holding on to these feelings ever since he joined the defense force, but confessing to you is not an option. Not with you gushing about your silly little crush on the Vice Captain right in front of him. It was tormenting seeing the woman he desired secretly, wanting someone who is not him. And before he knew it, you had completely become captivated by Soshiro, and he's already too late.

Hoshina Soshiro, Vice Captain of the third division, and the defense force's strongest close-quarter combatant. Reno? Just another officer under his command.

He already knew the outcome. Yet, it hurts. He was not prepared to let you go. He felt like you should belong to him and only him. He should be the one you awaken to each morning, the one you confided in when you were troubled, the one who'd always be by your side. It was difficult for him to accept the fact that he would never be that person for you.

Perhaps given enough time, he could finally move on from these feelings. From his unreciprocated love for you. Perhaps.

"Earth to Reno" you tried to get his attention. He was so immersed in his thoughts that he hadn't noticed you had taken a seat at the table, right beside him, no less.

"Everything okay?" You asked, giving him a concerned look.

He quickly responded, repeating what he said to Iharu earlier "Everything is okay, y/n-san. I was just thinking about what training I should do to increase my combat power"

Reno flashed you a reassuring smile, desperately trying to hide his true thoughts. You laughed softly and playfully messed up his hair. "As usual, you’re so focused on getting stronger." You teased him. "You should try to rest once in a while, you know. It’s part of the process."

"I will, y/n-san" he responded, unable to resist the urge to lean closer to you, soaking in the warmth of your presence. He wished this moment would never end, as it was one of the few occasions where he could experience your gentle touch.

"Y/n, is that—" Kafka pointed at the hand you had resting on Reno’s head. "Oh, you mean this?" You let out a soft chuckle, and gleefully showed them the ring. The ring sat perfectly on your ring finger, it was a beautiful piece, adorned with numerous purple gemstones and intricate designs.

"Soshiro proposed last night. Pretty isn't it?" You said, a soft smile grazing your lips as you admire the ring on your finger.

"Oh my God! Really?! Tell me more" Kikoru squealed, asking you for more details about your engagement.

Reno's heart sank. He had always known this day would come, but he hadn't anticipated it would happen so quickly. Of course, he knew deep down that your relationship with Soshiro was serious, but all of the shred of hope he'd held onto, that maybe someday you and Soshiro would part ways, and he'd finally get his chance, that maybe you'll wake up and realize that it was him who you love all along and not Soshiro- it vanished in an instant. His hopes- shattered into millions of pieces.

"I’m happy for you, y/n" he muttered, the phrase felt bitter in his lips.

He was far from happy, but he couldn’t bring himself to ruin your happiness. But seeing you happy, even in the arms of another man, offered him a small comfort.

Deep down, he knew that his feelings for you were not something he could ever let go of.

They would remain with him until his very last breath.

A/N: Got inspired by @justwinginglife's Like Magic fic. Sorry not sorry for the angst.

Might start writing more of kn8 fics (might) anyway, my request box is open so feel free to drop some requests!! /⁠ᐠ⁠｡⁠ꞈ⁠｡⁠ᐟ⁠\

|| Masterlist

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ladybyakuya · 7 months ago

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| I WISH YOU ROSES + KAIJU NUMBER 8.

+cw. —f!reader, smut headcanon + scenarios format, sort of exs to lovers, mature content, angst and hurt, comfort, alcohol consumption, established relationship

+syn.— making amends after the fight. who apologizes first? does it always end up with sex? or is he sleeping on the couch tonight?

+wc. —1.5k

+notes. — wanted it to be super smutty but ended up with angst instead. enjoy and scream in tags if you like it| redirect to blog navigation.

→ [ ICHIKAWA RENO ]

reno would stare at the screen of his mobile phone opening your message box yet not send a single text to you. he is a little stubborn. in the spur of the moment, he said, “maybe we had nothing, to begin with in the first place.” those were some heavy words. he won't disagree. even liquor isn't enough to drown his feelings about you. why do people drink to forget their love anyway? it's stupid. it's so stupid. he locks his phone and then buries his head in his hands murmuring, “god why can't I just call her?" the rusty fizzy flavor is threatening his throat again. his phone starts to vibrate and rings a little later making him jump a bit but his reflexes were quick enough not to get you a first full ring. “hello? babe? is that you?”

“just call her man.” Iharu drawls from the other side and disconnects the call even though he sits opposite him. Reno looks at him ungodly pissed until the prior speaks up, “don’t waste your anger on me, dude.” Reno’s phone rings again.

“you’re doing this on purpose, aren't you picking on me?” Reno tartly responds holding his phone towards him so sure about that Iharu is doing it again but that dimwit is so drunk that he has to lean forward, squint his eyes at the screen.

“no dudee. It's your girl—” Reno picks up the phone but he doesn't speak.

“are you at a bar right now? i just finished my work.”

“yes, I’m. can I go pick you up?”

“of’course you can but I got a cab. bye. text me the address.”

When you reach at the bar you could easily spot him. He is sitting at the corner in a secluded area. Ofcourse he is. Then, there is Iharu practically drooling on the table.

“why are you here?”

“what do you mean why I'm here? You texted the address.”

“yes but aren't you angry? At me?”

“yes but I know better than to take you seriously when you are that angry. ” he looks away from your face. “we can talk about it if you are still upset.” he shoots you a lazy smile and gets up.

“what about him?”

“what about who?” reno asks with pinched eyebrows.

Iharu’s snores are quite loud by now. You look at Reno holding your hand out. He doesn't protest. He gives you his phone and says his passcode. He gets you. His words are not drawly but rather slower than usual. At first, you intend to call Kafka but both of them being a pain in the ass you texted his vice-captain.

The can ride from bar to home was silent. Reno was laying his head down on your shoulder, eyes closed but a little fidgeting was there every now and then. As soon as you reach your apartment complex he got out, even leant against the wall while being on the elevator. He's sulking. It's adorable sometimes. When you reach your shared apartment he doesn't come in stands outside until you ask him to.

“i’m sorry.” reno says loud enough to kick out the drowsiness out of his body. “i'm sorry, babe.”

“well, it was partly my fault too but —” you grab his collar and pull him towards yourself. his defense system is useless against you. “but I'm going to make it memorable.” you say unbuckling his pants. As soon as his trousers hit the floor Reno closes the door with a kick while you go to your knees. “perhaps we should fight more,”

With his member in your hand you look up at him and then blink. once. twice. thrice. And then get up and walk inside your room. A few seconds of silence and then Reno is walking on your trail left by you apologizing for a few more times until you just shut him up with the most sloppiest toe curling blow job.

→ [ GEN NARUMI ]

“do not walk away from me. I'm not done talking yet.” Narumi's voice is perfectly flat devoid any splotch of anger or even frustration. he is leaning against the door as you move from kitchen counter to the dinning table carrying the dishes, then cooked meals and a water bottle. his eyes are going back and forth waiting for you to say something, anything or just yell at him. he can handle your blood and tears, not this silent treatment.

“well, don't treat me like I'm one of your missions and we are good.” you exclaim with a low voice while waving a hand as if you were talking to yourself but actually you just wanted to beckon him for dinner.

“i don't us to be just good. I want us to be better, to be comfortable in each other's presence, even in thoughts. . .” and now he is going to lecture you, like one of his subordinates. there is an agonizingly awful silence filling the room as you wait for him to continue but he is just there, standing, still silent.

you turn your chair to spare a look at him. his stance is still the same, lazy and nonchalant. he isn't mocking you or your love for him. he genuinely cares for you.

“i mean it.” he starts walking towards you in faster pace than usual. “and you know that.” he stands in front of you looking like a kicked puppy. the moment you leave your seat he is going to pounce on you like a wounded animal. this has happened before and last time it hurt a lot. so you don't get up instead just turn around to eat.

He grabs your wrist before you can even touch the food. “I said we’re not done talking.” he almost yells. seeing you flinch he sighs deeply before he gets on his knees and rests his head on your lap. “we submit are phones after turning it off. that's why I didn't know— that you were coming early from work. we work in different departments so we have different rules too. you can ask around. they'll tell you.”

“why didn't you say that earlier? was the whole fight really necessary?” you said with utter frustration laced underneath your voice.

“shouldn’t i at least get the benefit of doubt?” he looks at you placing his chin on your thighs.

you stroke his hair and he closes his eyes. “yes but — umm— never mind.” you say running your thumb over his lips. he graces a glance at you before running his hands on your back tracing up to your shoulders, he is crouching now and then pull away your top. now you're naked and sitting on a chair as he is standing. he throws the top away and sits on his knees again. hooking his arms around your calf muscles he licks in between your legs. “this is payback.” he whispers. your panty is still on and all Narumi is doing is licking slowly over the cloth, sometimes barely touching but if this is the payback you don't mind it at all, unlike last time.

→ [ HOSHINA SOSHIRO ]

Hoshina is the one who gives you the silent treatment even if he is at fault. He doesn't want his anger to harm you in any way, be it due to you or due to himself. He is not much of an angry person to begin with but somehow he just loses it for you. Maybe that's his protective instinct for you or the fear of melting the cocoon he created for his own protection. Either way, it's frustrating. It's frustrating enough that he keeps telling you how you should not put yourself in danger to protect him in a field mission yet you keep disobeying him at every mission. Either you are mocking him or trying to take his position which by the way both are wrong given the fact that you are his subordinate. He sat on one of the benches in the training room. he is too frustrated to concentrate on training.

“you know, you can let your anger out right? on me?”

Hoshina looks at you, pupils ever so still like a moonlight pond on a windless night. That's exactly what he doesn't want. don't you get that? you're wearing your night dress not your suit, which means you were either waiting for him or going to bed.

“i'm not mad at you.” he sighs. “not even myself. just at the situation in general. i know it's your instinct to protect people but sometimes . . .” he trails off looking at his fisted hand. he unfists his hand again.

“i can take it all, you know?. be it your love or anger. . .” Hoshina looks at you keeping his bottle aside. he swallows before leaving his place and dragging you inside the training room, the door still not closed.

“are you sure about that my love?” he graces his hands in between your thighs while whispering. you give him a nod. “let's see how long you last.” as his hand rubs against your entrance his mouth starts to suckle over your nipples as his other hand pins both of your hands above your head. the night suddenly feels long and breezy.

898 notes · View notes

kaszuma · 7 months ago

Text

Aera Perennius | Hoshina Soshiro

Part 7 of “Certainly Yours”

pairing: Hoshina Soshiro x fem!reader

summary: soshiro was never one to raise his voice at anyone. But the one time he did, it was because he almost lost you for good.

warnings: Slight Kn8 Manga Spoilers, Description of Pain / Injuries / Hospitalizations, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Arguments, Cursing, Slight mention of self-harm

wc: 9,793

–

note: I finiahed it earlier than anticipated so here you go-- I had such a difficult time writing this because I've been so busy. There were so many changes and the original draft had been scrapped so many times that it almost made me want to give up and start over. But lucky I didn't or I would've not updated in time. So, yay!

English is hard haha and sometimes it hates me and just doesn't make sense when I read it in my mind versus when I read it outloud. Anyways I will be doing slower updates, so no definitive dates nor titles for the next parts yet. But Part 8 and 9 will be back-to-back spicy NSFW stuff (courtesy of reaching 200 Followers. Thank you lots by the way), So stay tuned!! This is not proofread. So if I missed any warnings feel free to tell me. 🫶

–

Sleep had come naturally to you.

The sound of rapid footsteps and muffled yelling had all but faded into the distance as mere whispers against your ears.

Such rapidness did not seem to fit the silence of what had initially surrounded you. The sudden weight of your own body being dragged left and right until your vision blurs. The stark darkness of city skylines transformed into the unnatural shine of the hospital's fluorescent lights; one that made it hard to pick people's silhouettes apart.

And as such, it reminds you of the distant past.

One that was filled with vast open fields, very unlike the corporate labs you had been accustomed with. A stark contrast to the very corners of Japan, in the countryside where your grandparents had established a simple life for themselves. Filled to the brim with rice crops and summer cicadas.

And it makes you reminisce about the short time you'd spend there. On the cool nights after your summer school days would inevitably end. And you'd be dragged to a summer house where cousins and relatives had doted on you.

Such a homeward bound place was a far cry to the bustling streets of Tokyo's Eastern divisions. Which had often been endowed with the familiar cries of loud music and the steady rumbles of heavy railways underneath you.

One that Kaiju had lamented no peace from.

Even in the midst of high-story buildings where your workplace had boasted the use of sound proof walls. The cityscapes nearest Izumo Tech Corporation could not even be muzzled by its titanium doors, of which Japan's Top Secret Bioweapons had been kept. Schematics and all.

You had grown used to such a taciturn work environment.

Your existence is thrown into the small bubble of your private lab. Segregated from your coworker who valued work over social relations. And you had been much the same.

You and the rest of the technicians were far too focused on your projects. Tinkering away at the prototype suits that the company had sent your way. A partnership between your parent company and Japan’s Defense Force. A task of which you and a few others had been selected to create and maintain.

And how lucky you had been, to land yourself a snug spot in the notoriety of the Third Division's wake. The very same division that had boasted the least amount of casualties in the case of a large-scale Kaiju attack.

The very same division where Mina Ashiro had led and mounted into victory.

And you'd consider yourself lucky to have known such an amazing person in this lifetime.

For fate to have led her to you, you'd assume you've somehow accumulated some sort of good karma in your past life. The reward to you had been fresh in this new one. An action that had garnered some godly being to bestow upon you a chance to meet your soulmate.

You'd be remiss with disappointment if you hadn't met Soshiro Hoshina in this lifetime.

But prior to that. Before Ashiro had recruited you into her division, you had little to no contact with the officers on-field. Delegated to the simple task of sending blueprints in and out of Tachikawa's base should the time arise; begrudgingly in the early mornings of every month too.

Back then, you had befriended a bespectacled girl named Okonogi. Who wore a slightly bigger uniform than the rest of the recruits. A quirk of hers which you found rather amusing. She, who wholeheartedly believed she might still grow into the uniform that was two sizes too bigger than what was recommended of her.

And you had remembered the day you had met her too.

It was another typical day in your routine. Delivering notes to Captain Ashiro in and out of bases. Though this time, you had decided upon taking a detour. Seeing the empty spaces of the mess hall which granted you an opportune moment of grabbing some coffee.

And such a detour had led you upon the bespectacled girl. Your documents slipping from your very fingertips. And your other hand, which held the coffee mind you. Accidentally toppling over. Spilling the liquid against her pristine ivory lab coat. Staining it.

Lucky it had not been hot, or else that could've been an accident in the making.

“I am… so sorry about that.” Your eye catches the glimpse of her nametag, stained with a bit of caffeine. Okonogi was what it read. And you were already pulling out a handkerchief from your pocket. Intent on correcting the mistake you made.

“No, it's okay. Really.”

The sincerity in her voice made you visibly flinch. And you had half a mind to just shove her your wallet, a chance given to compensate her for the coat you ruined. But the look on her eyes was determined. Abrupt in the way she had declined you.

“Are you sure? Money shouldn't be a problem. I can definitely get you a better coat within the day..” You spoke with much guilt. And yet she insisted.

“No need, really! It's just a stain. Nothing a bit of bleach can't handle.” She moves lower with a smile, one hand tucked behind her knees as she tries to pick up the few folders scattered on the ground.

“-Lucky it didn't hit the documents! Or the Director would definitely have our heads for it.” Okonogi had surprisingly jested your way. And a small laugh bubbles between the two of you in turn. As if you had known each other for quite some time now.

“I suppose so.” You had spoken between giggles. The sentiment shared between the two had all but eased the tension of the room.

And the brunette had gingerly handed you the pile of documents that had been untarnished. Though, one in particular catches her trained eye.

It was a simple list of materials used for the next batch of combat suits to-be-made. Or at least, that was the pitch you had planned to present today. In the hopes that Mina Ashiro would give it enough attention and send it to command for a much more direct approval.

And Okonogi, who was a newbie at the time. Had known all too well of the budding genius you had been. A technician far too enraptured in improving Combat Suits and weapons catering for strange combat. One that did not conform to the normalcy of firearms which had modernized the era.

And it seems one of your papers in particular had caught her attention. Like a hammer against glass.

It was a series of notes and drawings involving bronze wires that resembled the muscle groups of a Kaiju's inner workings. All built into the combat suit that had been Izumo Tech's symbolic masterpiece.

And its Kaiju plating was as amazing as it was unconventional. Built to last no doubt in the wake of an ever evolving organization.

Okonogi could not help but stare at it. Admiring the artistry and engineering involved in such a concept.

“An idea of yours?” She asks. And you nod in turn. Surprised by the way she did not immediately question the schematics.

Normally you'd be met with strange looks. One that questioned the very ethics of your research for involving Kaiju parts into the combat suits.

But the Defense Force had long since been converting strong Kaiju into weaponry. And applying the same sentiments to a combat suit, should be no different. “That's right.”

“I was hoping to improve the current designs of the Combat Suits.” You admitted. “If it succeeds, it might help our soldiers a lot more. Survivability wise..I mean.”

And Okonogi smiles at this. A layer of irony mixed in with the few laughs that bubbled within her chest.

She knew how fragile lives can be. Especially in their line of work where they had faced massive enemies almost on a daily basis. And a battle of attrition against such monsters? It was never a pretty picture.

But still, it had been a rare sight to see one so dedicated with quality of life improvements. And it was as if Okonogi knew that she'd be able to trust you with such a task.

“Glad to see you working on it! People have been volunteering less and less these days. But if we had better tech, I'm sure our members would increase by a large margin.”

Her assurance made you nod. Already taking the paper from her hands and delicately sliding it back to the rest of the folders you held. Carefully standing as the both of you had come to smile at each other.

“If there's a chance it can save lives. There's no harm in trying. It's just a part of the job.”

“There's definitely a truth in that.” Okonogi remained positive with a dip to her head. Making her rimmed glasses slide gently from the bridge of her nose. A tilt in her head as she next spoke.

“-But, why use bronze by the way? Wouldn't steel or alloy be a better alternative?”

You had looked over to the notes peeking from your file. And a smile is etched on the very corner of your lips. Complacent in the way you had so easily looked at her, as if you knew something she did not.

“There's a saying you see.”

Okonogi tilts her head upward. Who had finally moved to fixate her gaze to you. Eyes meeting with the absolute tenacity and confidence at your craft. “...a saying?”

You nod. “They say that some people should seek things that are more lasting than bronze.”

“Does bronze not last very long?”

“Oh it does. But even in metals, people try to find something much better right?” Okonogi who had paused to think about your words. Had only nodded in turn. Your sentiment was a much more refreshing and positive take than she had imagined it to be.

“I intend to find that material. One that would make a monument more lasting than the lives we lost.”

And Okonogi’s breath hitches. And you had looked her in the eye, with a determination she was sure would last you a lifetime. “Even if that means I have to dissect a Kaiju and use its very skin as armor.”

A bit morbid for her take. But still, she couldn't help but admire your tenacity. It was the same sentiment she'd see with the soldiers. And somehow, it reminds her of a certain someone who was all smiles despite wielding a blade.

“I suppose most Kaiju do have a layer of tough skin..” She jested. And your shoulders shake with a bubbling smile. The start of a silly friendship perhaps, where Soshiro's eyes would soon flicker your way.

And somehow things just started to click into place.

You didn't know if it was fate. Had it been Okonogi or Mina Ashiro that led you to him. But it wasn't until a few weeks later, you had found yourself responsible for the Third's technical division. Overseeing much of the repairs and weapon upgrades needed for Kaiju slaying. And it was in that very same division where you had grown much closer to him.

A strange recruit, scouted from the Kansai district. Where Captain Ashiro had particularly shown a keen interest in. His skill in the blade had been incomparable to his peers. And although he boasted the highest individual body-count when it came to handling melee pursuits. You had once thought him stupid for sticking to a fighting technique that had long since aged from the existence of firearms.

But how wrong you had been in judging him for that.

Okonogi often reminded you not to be too harsh on him whenever the two of you had just so happened to meet. Jesting that you two would've made a stellar couple, had you both given each other a chance. And although you've denied such things a few times before, Soshiro would always take a glance at you as if reading the expressions on your face. Thoroughly investigating the subtle expressions you wore that would've reached his conclusion.

And each time after that, he too would answer for you. A denial. A white lie.

And Okonogi always saw through it of course. She had been there since the beginning. Serving cupid for the both of you.

And when she can, she had always been peppy in her step. Pushing the both of you in a particular direction. Waiting for one of you to make a move. Calculated like masters playing chess on a board. By far you two had been hopeless. If it wasn’t for Okonogi’s encouragement, Soshiro wouldn’t have thought to visit you between breaks. And how lucky you had been to have the girl pry him out of his skittish shell.

It’s a wonder you two had gotten together like this.

You had rarely seen the girl frown or be frustrated over anything. Let alone your own bite when it comes to Soshiro's mixed signals.

So it had been a sudden whiplash, seeing her so frightened above you. Her voice had been unusually drawled and shaky as she repeated your name. Trying to keep you awake despite the far off look you had in the depths of your irises.

Wait.

Why was it so blurry all of a sudden?

Where were you again?

Right.

You were injured. And from the look on her face, it was probably worse than you had realized. The trickle of an unfamiliar liquid slid down your forehead to the very height of your cheek. Where you could’ve sworn a clawed hand had been there to comfort you.

Larger than your own, and definitely plated with armor. Gently grazing the very skin of your cheek.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

It's starting to hurt. The pain on your lower back had suddenly hit you like a metric ton of weighted bricks. Like something jagged and sharp had punctured through you. A result from a bad fall.

“Sweetheart. Keep yer’ eyes open alright?”

You heard a deep rumble from the side. And your eyes pried away from Okonogi's disturbed features. Suddenly enamored by the wine red irises that looked at you as if you had gone through hell and back.

Had it really been that bad?

Last you checked, you were narrowly able to escape Kaiju's attacks. The flashes of its flaky features had encompassed your mind’s eye. And the ground below you had bellowed like a monster’s mouth. Suddenly ripping open as a shockwave had violently lifted you from your feet.

And like a leaf on a windy day, you were blown to the side. Crashing harshly against the window of a boutique. A stray shard puncturing your lower back to the point of near paralysis. And it leaves you barely conscious to see the not so lucky victims that tried to escape the Kaiju.

One group in particular had been crushed by the rubble of a building. And somehow the scent of blood and bones was enough to knock you out cold. Their downfall would’ve made you vomit, had you not been injured and too dizzy to think about it all.

And as morbid as it sounded, you had been fortunate enough to have only been thrown aside. Sacked into a world of pain which had reminded you that you were very much alive. It had been a miracle that Soshiro found you when he did. Despite the slight sprain on his ankle and the sores he felt in the muscles of his arms. He forced himself to run. Empowered to meet with you, ushered by the help of Number 10’s powers.

And like clockwork he was led straight to you. The fears he had once buried deep in the back of his brain had all came flooding through.

And he didn’t know what to do.

…

You heard a few voices then.

Although it was barely comprehensible, you could make out a few distinct ones from the array of shouts. Your name in particular was whispered in a prayer. Begging you not to fall asleep despite the odd temptation to. And sure enough, the back and forth argument you heard between two figures was enough to keep your mind and heart racing with urgency. The look between Okonogi and Soshiro’s face had all been so different than usual that it frightens you so.

But despite the noise, despite the shouting. You heard him in clear daylight. Like it had been the only voice in the room. Isolated from the rest who had rushed in a frenzy.

“I got ya’ alright? I’m here baby. I’m right here.”

His reassurances had blanked when his voice cracked. Desperate like he had been ready to cry. The way your name had escaped his lips was almost hesitant. As if he didn't deserve to call you out. And you wanted to stop him before his thoughts could drift further. But your voice had failed you when you needed it most. A soft cry escaping your lips instead.

I'm okay.

I'm here.

I'm alive.

All of that died the moment it tried to leave your throat. And without those very words. Soshiro's face was left to contort. As if he were the one in pain instead of you. And how he'd wished that were the case.

“Let me through!”

You heard him scream. And your eyes had focused just enough to see Okonogi and a few nurses blocking his pathway to you. Desperately trying to push past them despite the grievances.

The sight had been a blur.

One second your vision was fine. The next you had felt the telltale signs of drowsiness hit you. And you feel the way the pain medication had started to kick in when your eyes had isolated itself from the world. Your body’s exhaustion hits you squarely on the chest down to your very toes. And when you had been dragged to the next room over. Soshiro had been the last face you had seen before separation. Sleep pulling you over until your breath is taken from you in that instance.

Your name had been the only thing Soshiro could say afterwards.

“I said let me through–That's an order from your Superior Officer, Okonogi.” Soshiro had warned her. Voice uncharacteristically deep when issuing an order. It was normally never used in this way. Such a tone was only ever used to command Number 10 when he had been too stubborn to listen.

But the bespectacled girl knew better than to fan the flame. And in retrospect, she out of anyone would understand his frustrations the most. Yet she stood her ground. Gently shaking her head at her heated friend.

“Vice Captain.” Okonogi started. Hands already raised to try and calm him down. And she could see it in his eyes; the way it subconsciously followed the rolling bed they had put you in.

Dragging your bed into another room where only the best medical practitioners had worked on you. And yet despite that, he couldn't find it in himself to sit still. His gut sinking at the mere thought of you getting worse than when he had already found you in. And he was willing to bet Weapons 10 had all but read the blatant emotions he displayed on his sleeve. With or without having to delve into his mind.

He was in utter ruin just from your condition.

“-Please understand. You cannot, in under any circumstances enter the surgery room, sir.”

“To hell with that!”

The scream had made Okonogi frown. And Soshiro had half a mind to push past the smaller woman. And rush forward with Number 10's help. But he stopped midway. Reminding himself that his suit could go on a rampage at any time. And right now, he did not want to expose Okonogi and a handful of civilians to Number 10's war-ridden desires. His deep baritones had instead vanished for more firm ones. Unlike the resentment from prior. Oddly curt in his delivery.

“Move. Or I’ll do somethin’ drastic.” He steps forward.

A threat is a threat, and he hoped that would at least be enough to convince the bespectacled girl to move. Yet Okonogi had known him for far too long to actually perceive it as one. And she looks unfazed by his words.

“Sir please.” She pleaded. “It'll only worry you more.”

Her voice was gentle. Understanding even. It almost reminded him of the way you speak at times. Stern but with a hint of softness when it came to his stubbornness. And how he wished it was you he was talking to right now.

“Just please try to calm down. We should get your own wounds treated first and then we can-”

“Fuck no. I'm going in there and-”

“Hoshina.” The stern voice of their Captain had made them both flinch. And the heavy cleats of Mina Ashiro'a footsteps had gotten louder as she had made her way closer to the two.

“Captain Ashiro.” Soshiro had spoken with a much more leveled tone than he did earlier. Hand raising into a salute as the rest followed suit. Though even in his greeting, his frustrations had still been made entirely clear. And he was more than willing to face insubordination just to get to you. But Mina was one step ahead of him.

“Hoshina. You’re causing a disturbance and deliberately disrupting the medical wing from doing their job--I'd let you run some laps. But I can see you're injured.”

Soshiro had glanced down at his body, a light scoff emerging from his lips when she had noticed the way he stood, limping.

“Patch your own wounds up and we can discuss it later.”

And Soshiro had frowned at the way she immediately knew. A sixth sense perhaps that he had been getting sloppy. And sometimes he feared Mina Ashiro would kick him out of the Third because of it. But Mina made no such accusation, instead her eyes had been understanding.

Firm as they usually are, she, like Okonogi, was quite aware of your relationship with Soshiro. And by all means, she understood his sentiment.

Today had been a jumbled mess. And Soshiro was practically facing the very brunt of it all.

With you as its victim.

“But-”

“That's an order, Vice Captain. Do not make me repeat myself.” Her stern reply had been met with his half-meant glare. Red irises swirling with thoughts before ultimately concluding that Mina had been right. Okonogi too. He'd just been too stubborn to see it.

And for a good few seconds, he finally drops his own staring.

Reluctant as he had finally turned around. Facing Okonogi with a sort of defeated look in his eyes. Uncharacteristic to her as he'd normally be so cheery, even in the face of impending death.

He'd be thrown into a pit. And as long as he was still kickin’ he'd probably end up smiling and joking about it the next day.

This had definitely been a first for the two to witness.

And although Mina had not usually been the closest to Soshiro. He couldn't help but make an exception this time. She'd waive him of running laps, not as an officer. But as her friend. And a stern hand was placed squarely on his shoulder. Gently giving it a pat of reassurance. One that Okonogi would follow up with her own.

“It'll be okay. Right Captain?” Okonogi glanced between the two.

“That's right. I'll see to it personally that she gets the best care. For now, get yourself patched up–That'll be the punishment you get for speaking to your superior officer.” She awkwardly spoke. Though a small reassuring smile had cracked on the face of her usually hardened expressions.

And such a sentiment from both the girls had silenced him before he could think of another protest to answer with.

“understood.” He begrudgingly spoke. His hand balling into tight fists at the possibility that you'd wake up without him by your side.

Bronze was made to last, yet it wasn't exempt from tarnish after all.

“Good. I'll inform you shortly once her treatment is done–Okonogi.”

“Yes?” Her reply had been immediate.

“Make sure his wounds are treated. And, I expect a detailed report on Number 10's latest excursion later.”

“Roger.” Okonogi had saluted. And Soshiro watched her as she slowly walked past them. Entering the very same room where he had not even had the chance to take a glimpse in.

His arms had gently felt the pull to another direction. Okonogi had done well at Mina's request as he had all but dragged his feet further away from the blaring red lights of the operating room.

And the flicker of your sleeping face was all that’s left before he too was separated somewhere else.

A place where he was left to wonder what will become of you. And for a moment, his distinct thought was a scenario where he hadn't met you.

If only he hadn't asked you out that day..things would've turned differently.

Right?

…

Your eyes blew wide open. The strangled breaths you took were caught on your throat as you could smell the bitter antiseptics nip the back of your nostrils. It reminded you of a hospital. That of which you had the unpleasant experience of having to frequent anytime Soshiro would come back to base injured.

Often you'd be on the other side of his bed. A frown on your face as the condition of his health had been on the top of your mind. And each time with a smile, he'd make a joke to ease the tension in the room. A signal to indicate he had been alright. Despite the lack of words you two would exchange.

Habitually it was you unharmed. You left to worry at his bedside.

So it had been a rare sight indeed, to find yourself on the opposite side of the spectrum.

Laid in thin hospital robes. Connected to a needle of an IV drip. The constant flow of medicine made you drowsy and your thoughts jumbled into a mesa of numbness. And if you had looked at the amount of bandages wrapped around your torso you'd surely start squirming in place.

But just when you were about to scrutinize the heavy onset of your heartrate’s monitor. The blaring sound was all but silenced when you heard the familiar tremors of his voice. Smooth and soft, like you had always heard them as.

“Yer’ finally awake.”

You turned to his direction. Bright eyes had met his own which had been as familiar as it was squinted. His irises were more crystalline and tired than usual. Puffy on the corners, like he hadn't been given a chance to get a good night’s sleep between your hospitalization.

And yet, despite the unfamiliarity of his somber tone; the despondent frowns he'd make.

His voice had been the sound you missed the most.

“Soshiro..” You croak out. Voice dry like someone had stuffed cotton down your throat. And you try your best to scoot closer. To move and stand like you had always done when faced towards him. But this greeting would cut short. Hands restrained by firm bandages and hollow tubes that weighed heavily on your skin. And you hadn't realized the mumble of a barely audible whimper from your mouth. One that Soshiro could not miss even if he tried to.

Soshiro noticed the way you had squirmed. Struggling to sit up. Which made him all the more vigilant. And he ends up closing the small leatherbound book he'd always brought with him. Sinking it back on his pocket where you had been accustomed to seeing it.

Walking much closer to you in an attempt to calm and shush you.

“Where are we?” You asked him. And his fingers hesitantly graze your cheek. The same way when you had blood trickling down it moments prior. “Base. The Medical wing took ya’ in.”

His words were oddly curt in delivery. And although the average person who knew Soshiro on a surface level could probably not tell. You were able to differentiate the distinct way his voice had sounded odd. Such sentiments laid rather clearly for you. And you can see the layer of guilt etched on his stiff face.

“Okonogi?” You inquired. And he gives you a nod.

“Safe. I'll call her for ya’ later so she doesn't worry.” and you let out a breathless sigh. Your head slumping against the cushion of the soft pillow. The lingering feeling of glass and cement on you had all been but a pipe dream now. A memory that you'd soon forget.

And how Soshiro wished it was that easy for him to forget.

“How are you feelin? I can call the nurse for ya if anything hurts.” He moves to turn around.

Eyes already searching for the small caller that was given to him in case of emergencies. Though your hand, as painful as it felt, had pulled him in. Weak fingertips grabbing the sleeves of his jacket to refuse him. Your eyes remained squinted as they were sharp despite the fatigue. And you caught the glimpse of bandages wrapped around his skin. A stark testament to the rest of his unblemished face.

“What happened?” You had immediately tried to get up. Alert in the way you had wanted to reach out and inspect his own injuries. But the fatigue of your body had stopped you. Causing you to slump forward and unto his willing arms who had been cautious in the way he handled you.

“Easy. You're still…not well.” Soshiro gently nudged you back down. Hand placed squarely on your chest to ease you into the pillow. But you stubbornly persisted. Compromising by sitting up against the bed's headboard instead.

“That doesn't matter. What's more important is, what happened to you. Are you alright?”

“That doesn't matter? Are you seriously askin’ me that right now?” For a moment you mistake his scoff for a laugh. His hands which had held you firmly had just as quickly left leaving the spot on your skin cold and yearning for his proximity.

Had you said something wrong? This aggression was unlike him.

Soshiro was rarely this agitated. And your voice couldn't help shrivel in meek irritation. Unsure whether you should respond back with much the same turbulence.

“Should I…not be asking you that?” You spoke unsure. And he shakes his head in turn.

“You were dead-still for five days straight and yer tellin’ me THAT doesn't matter right now?”

You didn't know how else to reply. The way his tone had shifted into a scoff had made you double back to glare at his face. For once since you awoke, you truly saw how tense he had been. Gone was his usual suave smile that made you laugh or cry in between meetings.

He had been too worried to focus on that. But you had been too frustrated at this sudden change. That it made your voice come more forcefully than you anticipated. “Well isn't it obvious? I'm worried about you.”

You replied. Your own expression had squished into rapid vexation. And you see the way he takes a few steps back, too far for your touch to reach. And it pained you that you couldn't just stand up and make him face you like you usually could.

“And you think I don't feel the same!?” He spoke loudly. Causing your shoulders to flinch in turn. One he had regretted as soon as he spoke. And yet, he continued.

“You don't think..that I didn't nearly kill myself when I found you bleeding in the middle of that goddamn street?” He pointed out the window.

And your expression had turned liquid at the images that flash in your mind. Imagining how he had found you. His thoughts, his expressions..you could only imagine the torment he felt the moment he found you. Barely breathing.

His breaths came in gasps. Eyes widened so that you can clearly see the crimson of his eyes peeking through. And suddenly you notice the way Soshiro had oddly been so vulnerable in front of you. The quips on your sore throat began to die down when you saw how frustrated–how fearful he had looked in the moment. And gods did you wish you woke up sooner just to comfort him.

“No–that’s not what I meant. I only wanted to know if you were okay. Is it so wrong to ask?”

“Well maybe ya’ shouldn't have asked at all.” He huffed out. Looking away from you with regret lingering on his features.

It was stupid. He thought To get so frustrated over something so tiny. But as much as Soshiro Hoshina excluded the guise of a proper adult. He had been flawed just like the rest of everyone else. And he'd be lying if he didn't have his moments of doubt. Often scrutinizing in the lonely privacy of his home. Where he knew no one would bother him.

That is of course, before you had entered his life.

But not everything was understood between the two of you. Okonogi was a witness to the piles of misunderstandings you both had caused. And without help you two were likely never to get along, habitually falling for the same skittish routine you had played at.

But a miracle happened. With him belonging to you. And you belonging to him.

So why was it that your heart cramped so much? Surely it was not the pains of a physical injury. Let alone a type of sickness.

Instead it was struck by simple bad habits and insecurities. One of which even you had trouble dealing with. And the loud firmness of his voice had made such an impact on your heart that you began to frown. Unable to hold back your bite.

“What is your problem!?” You started. “Listen, can we just please have this conversation some other time. And then we can-”

“And then we can, what? Do you want me to just sit here and forget that all happened?” He had interjected.

And suddenly you feel your brows knit tightly. Eyes feeling heavy from the burst of a headache you had gotten. Of all the times Soshiro wanted to argue, it's the time you had just woken up.

But he wasn't entirely unjustified.

There have been plenty of moments where you had fanned the flames of a fire that should've ended right then and there. Your word choice is poor and your temperament less than ideal.

For as frustrated as you had been, you understood Soshiro's sentiments. And your hands had raised as a sort of white flag. Not needing this fight to escalate more than it should.

Not when you were both injured and all you wanted to do was crawl into his arms.

“-Listen Soshiro, I didn't mean to upset you. I only wanted to know if you were okay.”

“Does that matter?” He repeats your own words. And you had to hold back another jab of acknowledgement. Smart in the way he played his words. It almost made you want to laugh. But this time, your intent came from sincerity.

And his small play of mockery had been a sight for sore eyes, since you had quickly gotten the gist of what he had been trying to convey. Wrong in your choice of words. This time, you correct your mistake. Sincerity and all.

“Yes it matters. More than anything– of course it matters.” You had told him. And you see the way Soshiro’s mouth quivers into a small tremble. Uncanny when he'd normally be so laid-back and sweet when it came to you.

And how you'd wish he just took a breather and relaxed. Maybe take a break so that they could talk things out. Without yelling preferably. But that had not been possible. At least not just yet from the way he replied.

“Well had I not made it in time, you woulda’ been dead. Do you hear me?”

“And yet, Here. I. Am. A witness to your unwarranted behavior.”

“Behavior that's justified because I shouldn't have let you outta my sight.”

Silence had followed soon after. Your mouth gapes for a moment to think of a reply when the words slip past your lips. And Soshiro would note how uncharacteristic that was, even for you. He, who was always used to your quick replies and clever jabs. But it seems his words had cut too far this time.

And he pried his eyes away from you. Chest heaving as he ran a hand through his face. “I shouldn't have..”

He composed himself. Clearing his throat whilst you looked at him with an etched frown on your face. One that he wished would go away. But he had been the cause of this.

He had been the one to make your smile go away. And it somehow makes him feel even worse.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you. I just-”

“Soshiro.” Your voice sounded like bells. And when he looked up, relief had immediately sagged his shoulders upon seeing your gaze blown wide open. Not at all restrained by the pain medication and exhaustion you had felt.

And your hand had gently reached up to grab his own. Gentle in the way her thumb caressed his knuckle which had been previously so bruised and bloodied.

And although there was a struggle to reach for his hand. Your touch was met halfway. Gently threading your much softer skin that would've paled in comparison to a blanket had he not taken glances.

“What happened back there wasn't your fault. We couldn't have known that the Kaiju would follow me back to the shelter.” You whisper. And Soshiro's expression had turned serious. Like he held a weight that you couldn't possibly fathom even if you tried.

“And yet I let it slip away.”

“I let it get to you, and now you're in here because of me.” He had wanted to so badly pull away from you. To walk himself out before he could be tempted to lean back into those pretty eyes of yours. But the moment he met your sight.

Those sad eyes of yours had been his journey's end. And he couldn't do that to you. Not when your expression had frustratingly asked him to stay.

“And yet it was also because of you that I'm still alive and breathing, Soshiro.” You reasoned. “You don't give yourself enough credit. If it hadn't been for you I would've been-”

“Dead.” He cut you off. “You would've been dead.”

“No. You wouldn't have allowed that. You're the Vice Captain, remember? If there's anywhere safer for me, it's by your side.” You didn't know whether such assurances had really made him listen. The way he was assured in that answer of his wasn't a mere fortnight conclusion. It was as if he had been thinking of such consequences for a much longer time, and that alone makes your heart sink.

So you scooted closer. Moving in to try and pull him down so that you could wrap your arms around his neck. And just when you were snaking it through his shoulders. His hands had stopped you midway.

His calloused palms holding on to the points of your elbows as he gently pries you off of him.

Normally this would be met with your pout. Maybe another bout of force just let the stubborn man look your way. But you had been too weak, still healing from an injury you had no control over. And his response is far too swift for your liking. Leaving your arms missing the warmth his body could provide you.

“No, no, no, no, no–no. You don't understand. I don't deserve to be anywhere near you right now.” He had managed to convince himself. Looking away as the anxiety within you had spiked upon his words.

“Soshiro. Listen to me we can-”

“What I’m saying is that we're done here.”

You had blinked. Looking up at him who had towered above your bed. A somber look on his expression despite the daunting words he had spoken. He looked passive. Unaffected even. Like he had been ready for this moment which had been planned for a long time coming. And your voice could only muster a feeble whisper.

“What do you mean we're done?”

“It's over.” Soshiro continued. Not once paying your face any heed. Lest he change his mind from doing you a greater good he deemed correct. “I don't want anything to do with ya’ anymore.”

If this had been a dream you would've laughed at the way he delivered such a sentiment.

You'd somehow suppress the inner workings of your shock and you'd wake up to find the morning documents you promised yourself to do; in the desk untouched where it usually had been.

And by the time you left your room, you'd habitually laugh it off and tell Soshiro about it in the afternoon just to get a chuckle and light scolding out of him. The usual banter that admittedly, had always been the highlight of your day.

But this had not been a dream.

And hearing him say that. Had hurt more than you anticipated it seemed. And your voice cracks before you can even register yourself speaking.

"Is this because you think I can't love you?" The sudden appearance of tears had painted your face. And you had tried to sniff away the bigger ones that threatened to spill over. But to no avail.

And Soshiro’s eyes widen at the telltale signs of your crying. An unexpected third party which had not been invited to the list of things he ought to do. And his head reels to face you once more. Seeing your face redden with a shame he'd never thought he'd see.

"Do you really think that I'm incapable of willingly loving you? Even beyond that fucking sword of yours-" And Soshiro had all but shook his head. Remorseful in the way tears had jerked from your eyes.

"That ain't the point!"

"Then what IS the point!?" Your tears had blurred your vision. And your hand had embarrassingly moved up to wipe it. One that Soshiro had wished to do for himself had he not been so stubborn.

“-What is the point if I can't make sense of you trying to leave me?"

The turmoil in your voice had been made present. One so encompassing that Soshiro couldn't ignore. And as much as it hurts you to scream. It hurt him to see you suddenly cry like this. Someone he associated as being so usually strong-willed, crumbling in a few short words from him. And suddenly, it feels as if he wants to swallow back his words. Mouth churned into regret when he had moved to take a step closer to you.

“Sweetheart, please..I-”

He shook his head. Suddenly finding himself kneeling down in front of your bed. And when your eyes had met his, it was as if his heart had stopped momentarily. Too focused on the way you had looked at him in desperation. Mixed with both physical and emotional pain.

And he had been the cause of that. Regrettably he knew he had been the cause of that.

"Is the idea of me loving you THAT terrible of a concept to you?" you spoke flimsily. Words betraying the tone you wanted to convey. And somehow you felt worse than when blood was unnaturally seeping out of your wound.

And his own body. One that betrayed his own commands, had a mind of its own. Strong arms wrapping around your bandaged ones that had still been healing from the minor cuts you had accumulated. And the warm steady beat of his heart had drowned you back into reality. Cheeks pressed against his and regrettably, soiling his jacket.

Not that he minded of course. Far too focused on wiping your tears away. Shushing you when you'd shudder from the breathless sniffles he'd been the cause of.

"Shit- no sweetheart no. I didn't mean it."

“I didn't mean it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” His instant apologies and regrets had echoed for a few moments. The sudden urge to calm you down had him reeling just to caress your shoulders. Weary of the injuries you were faced with as you cried in his arms.

And the struggling shudders you were faced with had all been too painful to see. Comical in the way he had all but worsened your condition when stressing a healing patient had been the last thing people needed to be reminded of.

Yet here you were, struggling to even cry when every breath would agitate any bandaged injuries you'd gotten. And it had been his fault entirely.

“I'm not leaving ya. I'm right here..” He whispered. And you had forcibly glanced up. Seeing the way his distress had wrinkled those usually foxy eyes. Like he had suddenly gained a keen sense of his stupidity and finally realized that his sentiments were not helping you. And upon realization you couldn't help but feel how silly all this had been.

You would've laughed had you not wasted such excess energy into crying your heart out in front of him. Likely an accumulation from the week's worth of not being able to see each other.

That and other things, which were obvious enough.

But you spoke. Wanting to pick his thoughts apart. Reason with him the next time this may happen. And your eyes flutter away the tears as you had finally managed to calm down enough to ask him.

“Then why? Why even suggest that?” Your voice had been soft. His thumbs move to caress the stray tears away from your face. Even moving to casually use his sleeves to gently wipe your cheeks in assurance of his presence. And you close your eyes at the simple gesture. Suddenly feeling much better now that he had been so close to you like this.

Crap, he set himself up didn't he? And just when he had this all planned out too.

In the wake of your hospitalization, he had planned to leave you. Somehow make you change occupations. Maybe work for a tech company where your life wouldn't be on the line. Where you'd be far away from his life and you could live a happy, seperate life from him.

But who was he kidding? Even he thinks it's stupid. The idea of doing you the greater good.

It had sounded conclusive back then.

He'd likely die young, a Kaiju attack that he had lacked defenses in no doubt. And somehow, you'd weasel your way out and live an old happy life.

Like bronze. Tarnished but long lasting.

But you had seen through his intention. And every right to refuse such a concept had knocked him over the head. A simple shed of tears was all it took for such a carefully built wall to crumble. His resolve in shambles at the mere thought of you leaving.

And to take that away from you. To separate the both of you like that? It felt wrong. And somehow his stupidity makes him laugh.

And the next words uttered had been voluntary on his part. Sloppy but it came out from an honest place. That even he doubted its power.

"Because, it scares me how much I need you. Okay?" He leans in. Head against your own so that your noses would touch. And you could see the little cracks on that smile of his. A stark contrast to the facade of laughs he'd usually give off. And it makes your heart flutter upon such fleeting confessions.

"Just hearing that voice of yours is enough to wreck me. And ruin me for anybody else."

"And when I saw you. Layin' there with that faraway look on your eyes. I just couldn't fucking breathe."

The way his eyes had not once left yours had felt like the first time you had met him. In that room with the Captain watching your interactions.

You had been less amicable to each other by then. Always second guessing each other by investigating the little nuances of your expressions. But somehow, the difficulties in reading each other had not been so far fetched. And the longer you two would spend time together. The more you had an inkling of what the other was thinking. And eventually an unspoken understanding had come between the both of you.

One that required no words to speak. Nor assistance from anywhere else. Just you and him. Nothing more.

"What If I lose you? You're all I fucking have.."

"Soshiro.” You whispered. Suddenly feeling the weight of his words drop down on you upon his realization. And you shake your head in turn. Immediately running your hands on the soft tresses of his hair. “You’re not going to lose me.”

“And what if I did?” He was quick to interject. “What if I had been a second too late and you were killed?”

“-And yet I'm still here. See?” You moved his intertwined hands to your chest. Firmly letting him feel the pulse of your heart. A repetition had to be made in order to convince him. And if you had to do such things a million times, there was no doubt you’d do it a thousand more times.

And his hand couldn't help but press firmly. Gingerly looking everywhere to check your wellbeing. Satisfied when he had settled in your slightly puffy eyes that he had been all too remorseful of when he found it too pretty to look away from.

You leaned in. Pressing light kisses against his cheeks to calm his thoughts. The voice in the back of his head all but silenced. When the adrenaline kicked in, because somehow he found himself unfocused when he caught your lips in his.

It was short and sweet.

Far different from the many picturesque and grandiose kisses he'd read about in books. And far too slow amidst the rush hours of your working breaks. Where you'd snag a few touches here and there just to get a rise out of each other. No this had been far too different. Far too gentle than it normally was. But despite the innocence of such a contact. It had made a more lasting impact on him.

The hesitation implied vulnerability, and without it. You'd be remiss to see Soshiro's true feelings underneath it. And it makes you pull away to rub your own hands against his chest. Admiring the way his uniform had engulfed him warmly in the cold air conditioning in the room.

All that matters was that they were okay now.

All that matters is that they are together now. Is that so much to ask?

“I won't die so easily, Soshiro.” Your assurances had made him perk up. Head still leaning against yours where you could see the pretty hallmarks of his tired eyes.

“I may not be able to know..everything in that damn head of yours. But what I do know? Is that I have unwavering trust in you. And that's the only reason I made it out alive today.” Your voice had made him crack a smile. One that makes you raise a brow at him. Suddenly fixated on the way his demeanor had changed so easily when you had spoken your piece.

And Soshiro, ever the enigma that he was. Had stopped his reluctance around you. Finally getting a chance to relax as his hands slotted its way to the bounce of your cheek and jaw, which he had always found so endearing to touch and look at.

He couldn't help but run soothing circles on your flesh. A habit he might've picked up on when reading a few romances here and there.And it makes you wonder if he had always been this sweet. A layer unknown go you that you'd love to rediscover, if only he'd put down that smart mouth of his.

“I think that was ‘bout a week ago.” He corrected you. His face is as snarky as his comment. And that was enough to shake your head.

But of course, that had been too much to ask. Too far and few inbetween. You spoke too soon.

“Fine. A week ago.” You affirmed. Though this time you had rolled your eyes with a laugh of your own.

And the two of you had simply sat there. Soshiro rocking you back and forth as best he could without risking your injuries. Hands against the plush of your waistline, carefully making sure the stitches were still intact. But the warmth had remained.

This time he had been less distant. More calm and understanding like he had usually been. And that was enough for you. For now.

“Do you mean that?”

“Mean what?” You had blinked with a smile on your face. Sweet as it came, you had a viper that you knew how to use. And Soshiro wasn't ever one to stop confronting it. Even if he had to break out of his shell to ask the harder questions between you both.

“When you said you loved me.” He added.

And he wouldn't be able to miss that pretty smile forming on the corners of your lips. Leaning against him until the softness of your lips had grazed his chapped ones. Though you’d note, it was still gentle. Still his. And still yours to capture should you want it.

“Do I have to kiss you again and prove it?” You mutter out.

“Do you not want to right now?”

And without a doubt did you lean in. Capturing his lips with a crooked smile in between. Soft and sensual. And you had missed this. Missed him who had not gotten the chance to set things right by you.

How long had it been since you had taken the time to really kiss him? Without the rush of prying eyes, nor the responsibilities that came with their work. It was just a kiss, yet in this moment it felt like everything.

Slow and reassuring. Without the need of words to complicate things. It had conveyed everything he needed to know. And when you pulled back, Soshiro could see the pretty pearls of your teeth. Admiring the way your lips had bruised red from how eagerly he had captured your mouth. And he wouldn't dream of being anywhere else in the world right now. Not when you had looked so perfect. Hospital gown and all.

“Does that prove my point?”

He laughs. Something you had always thought to be pretty.

“Maybe.” The familiar trace of his hand had brushed past your hair. Straightening out the few loose strands that could obscure him from your face. And his smile, although back to the usual cat-like facade, had now softened up significantly upon your presence. And you had prided the way this man had looked at you like you had offered him the world.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at ya. I just-”

“Shh..I know.” Your hand had touched his lips. Admiring the way it too, had reddened from your previous kisses.

“I'm tougher than bronze, you know? I'm not so simple as to let a few words bend me sideways.”

“Okonogi tells me the same.”

“And right she was. You should learn a thing or two from her.” And a laugh bubbles between the two of you. He had to remind himself to save his apologies later for Okonogi. For despite her absence, even now she was playing cupid for them. The small voice in his head urging him to tell you how he truly felt.

And without warning. He managed to say it outloud.

“I love you.”

Those words had struck a melodic chord in you. Ones that made you look back at him in temporary stupor. Before finally turning giddy at the way he so gently said it. No remorse. No regret. A fact even she couldn't deface as mockery. When there'd normally be a trick of a joke involved.

And in your quiet smiles held a deep admiration for him. Ones that squeezed Soshiro's hand despite the difficulty of your injuries.

But that didn't matter. Injuries heal after all. And right now, you had been far too focused on him to mind the slowly subsiding pain on your body.

“What's this all of a sudden? You're not joking are you?” You ask cautiously. Though a smile still remained on your face. Far too elated at hearing those words. And from the look on his face, you could tell he had been serious in his admission.

“It's not sudden. I just–” Soshiro lets out a small chuckle. Not entirely sure why he feels so nervous in the wake of your question.

“I meant to say it that day. Before the Kaiju attacked. I wanted it to be perfect for ya and..” His voice stops when you lean in. Cuddling him down as best you could in the safety of the hospital's bedsheets. The understanding look in your eyes had all but told him that you knew. And it makes him think twice about having to explain things to you again. Not when you could now read him so well. Especially in the most important aspects of his life.

“I know. You don't need to tell me twice."

He heard you speak. Though the hint of playfulness in your voice hadn't subsided. A reminder that you had been slowly regaining your strength. And pretty soon, you'd be pulling him down by the collar just to kiss him breathless if you wanted to.

But for now, he was gonna have to take care of you. Take the lead and deal with your smart comments. And it makes him smile knowing he'd get to hear such witty banters from you again. More so now that you were awake.

“Really now? And I thought you'd be happy to have me say it outloud for ya.”

His chuckle had made his chest rumble. And you could feel the pleasant vibration as your head fell squarely on his chest. A roll in your eyes as you had hummed in reply.

“Well…I suppose it couldn't hurt for you to say it again.”

And he would. He'd do it as long as you'd allow him that privilege.

And this time, he too had read you like an open book. Somehow fitting perfectly in the way they understand the other without needing to speak. They needed to work on it. They needed each other more than ever before.

So it was lucky their bonds were more lasting than bronze. And fate had brought them together.

#anime #kn8 #kaiju no. 8 #hoshina soshiro x reader #soshiro hoshina #soshiro hoshina x reader #hoshina soshiro #kaiju no 8 x reader #kn8 x reader #definitely self indulgent #angst #angst with a happy ending #hurt/comfort #arguing #kn8 manga #kaiju number 8 #mina ashiro #konomi okonogi

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hoshinasblade · 6 months ago

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"time cast a spell on you, but you won't forget me / i know i could have loved you but you wouldn't let me / you'll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you" but make it about hoshina soshiro

when hoshina soshiro ended things with you, he said he did it because you deserve more than to be a young widow.

you would have called bullshit, but you recognise the truth is not far from his argument - defense force officers sometimes succumb to fatal injuries during kaiju attacks, and hoshina may be a skilled swordsman, but he isn't a god. as if the reason isn't enough, you knew that if he had wanted to stay with you despite being aware of the possibility of him dying in the field, he would have.

ten days before your third anniversary, hoshina abandoned your life and did not leave any traces at all. you did not know whether to be thankful that he was the one to tell your mutual friends of what transpired between you two.

it should have relieved hoshina; not being tied up in a relationship gave him more freedom to choose for himself - he even agreed to wear the weaponised kaiju no. 10 suit despite the likelihood of his lifespan decreasing because at least this time, he isn't worried that he will be leaving you alone in this world should something tragic happen to him. he's a more effective vice-captain if he doesn't have anything to lose.

really, it should have relieved hoshina but it doesn't.

he still makes his coffee the same way you taught him how to when you were just first seeing each other - two sugar and one cream, because he likes sweet things. everytime his jokes sell among the crowd of new recruits, he would get a flashback of how your laugh would sound like. he doesn't know if it's just in his head because it's been a while since he's seen you, much less heard your laugher. one time, when a particularly brutal kaiju attack occurred in the area close to where you live, hoshina soshiro prayed for the first time since he was a child - begging for any saint who would listen that hopefully you're safe, that you're alive.

really, the breakup should have relieved hoshina but it didn't. sometimes when he is too tired from training he would fall to his bed, his hand would trace the other side of the mattress for you only to find the cold and empty touch of his own blanket.

#i should not be allowed to listen to sad songs at night #because things like this happen #angst angst angst #hoshina soshiro x reader #hoshina soshiro #soshiro hoshina #soshiro hoshina x reader #lian's thoughts #hoshina x reader #hoshina soshiro fic #kaiju no. 8 #kn8 x reader

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inzaynety · 7 months ago

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part of the job ⤫

➢ summary: after using no. 10, hoshina realizes one of the reasons behind his drive to fight. after listening, you realize the limits to your everything.

➢ content: hoshina x fem!reader, 1607 words, non-explicit injuries, spoilers from the manga (fight starting at ch. 88 and hoshina’s past lwky), locking someone up (crack part lol), slight angst, hurt/comfort

➢ notes: yo🫸🏼🫷🏼this is more of a character analysis for hoshina and reader so i added some dialogue from the manga itself to connect it a little more (w/ reader influence ofc be we’re delulu like that)

pt. 2 - pt. 3 of slice & dice - pt. 4

Not yet. My sword is right there.

He feels like he’s floating, like his body is lighter than he remembers. But there’s no time to waste, he has to grab hold—oh. That’s why he feels that way.

His arm is gone.

Hoshina stares in shock as his blade moves further and further away, and all that’s left is him and his thoughts. He can’t feel himself moving; he can’t feel himself breathing.

If he were his brother, he would have been able to switch over to his firearms without a worry and take down the Kaiju just like that. For crying out loud, this was a smaller one. This should have been easier for him. His father and the first commander he trained for, didn't need his particular set of skills.

And you—what were you doing there? He knows he’s dying, and he knows this is what people might see before they go. But how cruel is it when it’s your own lover staring back at you?

If he were you, what would he do?

He’d take your other hand and shove his blade back in there, probably complaining about how hard to hold Izumo tech made them, more so than the guns at least. And he’d push you to keep on fighting even if neither of you knew you’d make it back.

Why? Because he knows how much you love your weapon. He knows how much you trained with that old thing more times than he can count. And he knows it’s the same for him.

A jarring laugh takes him out of his thoughts. Hoshina gasps and clenches his left fist, then his right. His arm was still there.

How was that?! I totally fended it off!!

That son of a bitch Kaiju No. 10.

You can’t listen.

Having been injured in a previous mission yourself, you were pretty much banned from joining the fight anywhere. Your division knows that despite whatever persona you had as their commander, if there was a place you’d want to be, you’d be there no matter what.

The only thing you could do now, however, was send your vice commander and platoon leaders off before settling into your office and waiting. The control room was only a corridor down and from the messages you’d been receiving, your team was doing just fine.

You just didn’t know if he was. The First and Third had their fair share of strong opponents but it doesn’t seem like they ever caught a break. Even if they were going to be using Kaiju powered suits and weapons, that was never going to be enough, was it?

You only had the call with Okonogi to go off of and had placed yourself on mute so as not to distract her from her job. But it scared you instead upon hearing the Third’s own shouts and cries of their vice commander’s name.

Your finger hovers over the red button after a particularly devastating yell until an alarm blares in your office.

“Commander! There’s a situation with Mizutani’s Platoon!”

Without hesitation, you lift your finger off and connect it to your in-ear, placing your phone in your pocket before rushing to the control room.

Why is it that even though I’d lose and lose, I never stopped swingin’? Why is it that even after being told I should give up time and time again, I never stopped fighting?

He stands unwavering on an equal level with Kaiju No. 10 sitting in front of him, waiting idly for his answer.

“To beat my brother.”

No.

“To hold on to the one thing I’ve got goin’ for me.”

No!

“To fulfill my duties as vice-captain.”

Quit trying to put up a front!

Hoshina doesn’t know what the monster wants to hear, but he knows they don’t have much time right now. No. 12 is much stronger than No. 10 was and he can’t imagine what would happen if he failed to neutralize it now. Only he could do something about it but now he was utterly lost. What could he do?

The world around him steadies and he blinks. Oh.

“Because swingin’ the sword...”

Kaiju No. 10 doesn’t move.

“...is fun.”

No. 10 grits its teeth, veins popping against its skin as it rises, its eye peeking from the cross-shaped hole in its head.

That’s right.

You’re pacing back and forth, receiving poorly concealed glances sent your way by your own division. It felt like an eternity from the time you were called into the room to the time of any other update from the Third Division. This can’t be healthy.

You hate thoughts like this. They give you doubts. Doubts about things you can’t control by yourself, nor can you even if you were given the wheel. It’s not in your place to stop him or abandon your post just for him. You wish you could split yourself in half and not worry so much, but wouldn’t it be easier to find a way to get rid of that worry? What about–

“Vice Commander Hoshina has neutralized No. 12!!” Okonogi announces that you can hear it through your in-ear as well as your control room’s speakers. Your team lets out a collective cheer and sighs of relief as you visibly relax, reaching into your pocket to hang up the call.

On the monitors, every platoon leader and officer worked with pride and neutralized their own Kaiju with ease from the moral boost that, among Shinomiya and Gen’s victories, had given them. Everything was going to be fine.

But the piercing eyes of those thoughts stay in the back of your head.

His whole body is sore and hot when he wakes up. The smell of fresh linen and alcohol comes to his senses and when he opens his eyes, you’re right there in front of him. Hoshina’s surprised but he’s also imagining the look on the medics faces seeing you rush through the halls like he knows you did.

“Sweet–” You punch his better side and he yelps. He tries to retort at the action but one look at your face has him holding it in.

“Dumbass! Stupid. You were—god, I swear I’m locking you up and never letting you see the light of day.” But then you’re gently pressing your face against the same arm and letting out the deepest sigh you had been keeping in. His expression softens as he brings his hand up to pat your head.

“Not even congratulations? Good job?” You were probably aware of how much he overheated his suit and definitely aware of how he was using the prototype No. 10 suit, so that did not help in extinguishing your worries. Yeah, he was reckless alright.

Tears start to form in your eyes and while you’re grateful that your face is hidden from his sight, Hoshina knows you better than that. You must have been so worried for him while being preoccupied with your own division and everything. It was so, so hard. Your grip on the back of his pillow doesn’t go unnoticed.

The sudden thoughts hit you again and guilt runs through you. How could you think that?

“Hey–” Hoshina starts as now you’re crying, holding onto his arm with a grip just a tad lighter than the one you have on the cloth behind him. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” You weren’t one to cry so much, at least not lately. He made that a mission for himself.

You only shake your head, allowing yourself to be moved by a man more hurt than yourself into his arms as he comforts you. His warmth is there, his heart is beating, and his words are spoken right into your ear to tell you he’s there. He’s alive, he’s fine.

But what if he wasn’t? What if he didn’t make it out of there?

“Look at me.” His voice is firm, juxtaposed with the hands lifting your face to get you to focus your attention on him. “I’m right here.”

You should be here comforting him, not the other way around. Of course, your Soshiro would be the one to do this, though. You raise your eyes to him and come to the realization of the utmost contentment you’ve ever felt. Something you’ve always felt with him.

Of course, your Soshiro.

It takes a few moments but you’re able to calm yourself. He wipes away your tears with his thumbs, and waits patiently in case you want to say something, even if it is nothing at all.

“I…” You can’t pick out your words right away, “...felt like I couldn’t do anything. Watching you like that. Soshiro,” he’s hanging onto your every word, “I thought that if, just for a second, you weren’t in my life, maybe it’d be easier to not feel like that.” Even coming from your own mouth, it sounds too harsh and too horrifying to say out loud. His hold falters, you can feel it, and you’re immediately wracked with more guilt.

“But–”

“That’s okay.” Is what Hoshina answers first, stopping you. His hands on your face grasp you more and bring you closer to his. “I’d like to think I know ya enough to know what ya want to say. Maybe ya don’t know it yet.” The glint in his eyes are back, earning an automatic roll of your eyes.

He’ll tell you later how much you helped him.

“There’s my girl.” He places a kiss on your nose and rests your foreheads together. “Besides, ya can’t get rid of me that easily.”

You’ve helped him so much more than you think.

“I’ll always be here.”

©inzaynety 2024

#kaiju no. 8 x reader #kaiju no. 8 fluff #kn8 x reader #kn8 fluff #hoshina x reader #hoshina fluff #hoshina angst #kn8 angst #kaiju no. 8 angst #hoshina soshiro x reader #hoshina #hoshina soshiro #soshiro hoshina x reader #soshiro hoshina #fics

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sweettofuki · 7 months ago

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"Every relationship is different, but ours was my favourite."

pairing: Hoshina Soshiro x emotionally reserved reader genre: angst -> fluff, a little smut summary: you and Hoshina are exes and you're not taking it as well as you thought. warning: minors do not interact, slight cursing a/n: credits to @daily-prompts; prompt 2485 and @helpful-writing-tips! part two here wc: 1876

“I’m confident that you belong in an asylum!” Hoshina snarled.

“Like you weren’t born in there,” you retorted.

“What were you thinking?? You could have gotten yourself killed.” Hoshina hissed.

“It would have been an improvement to my life anyway,” you mumbled.

“What was that?” he whipped his head around.

“Nothing.”

The tension in the air of the meeting room was palpable, so thick that a knife could slice through it. Every leader in the room shifted comfortably, their eyes darting anywhere but towards the two of you.

It was no secret that you and Hoshina were exes. Five months had passed since the breakup—a decision you regretted. Getting involved with a colleague was a mistake, blurring the lines of professionalism. But in your defense, he’s just so damn irresistible. His quick wit, contagious laugh, and not to mention, his skills in bed.

Those same reasons were what broke you when you asked to end it. In truth, your relationship with him had always been rocky, and the added combination of a vice-captain and a platoon leader from different divisions does not make it easier.

Every time you asked him to spend time together, he always seemed to have something going on. Whether it was paperwork, fighting Kaijus, testing new technology, or keeping his platoon in check, he just never seemed to have enough time for you.

Every day, you stayed up waiting for him in your shared bed, only to meet with silence, too exhausted to even exchange words.

No matter how much was on your plate, you always made time for him, a fact he seemed to take for granted. Yet, you knew you had your own faults too—communicating your needs was never your strong suit. God forbid you to have communication skills. When you needed something, you found it difficult to speak up.

Despite all your efforts, it felt like the universe was conspiring against your relationship. You often found yourself wondering, "Does he love me?", "Has he fallen out of love with me?", "Why did he even get into a relationship with me in the first place?”

[♡]

This takes us back to the present.

The night before, there was a Kaiju attack with a fortitude of 7.6. Both your division and Hoshina’s were assigned to neutralize it. The mission was going well until Kaiju no. 9 intercepted and brought the Kaiju back to life, with twice its strength than before, reaching to a fortitude of 9.4.

Everyone fought to the best of their abilities, but half of your platoon was down, and you weren't doing any better. With multiple broken bones and exit wounds, you could barely stand. If not for the combat suit’s advanced technology, you would have bled out to death.

Despite the pain coursing through your body with every movement, you rise to your full height, determined to subjugate the demon in front of you.

“Platoon Leader L/n! Please stand down! Your vitals are abnormal, and your suit is down to 1% power. You will die if you take another step.” the officer monitoring you from the comms pleaded.

“Shut it. I can still fight,” you growled.

“The vice-captain from the Third Division is already on the scene! He can handle the kaiju!” the officer said.

“He can’t fight large-class Kaijus alone. Let me provide him backup,” you pushed back.

“Listen to Officer Takashi, L/N,” Hoshina's voice cut through the comms. "In your current condition, you won't be much help anyway.”

Tsk. Just hearing his voice irritates me.

Then, you heard him switch to a private channel.

“Please,” he pleads softly.

You closed your eyes, steadying your breath.

“Officer L/N standing down.” you conceded.

"Good girl," Hoshina said, lowering his voice into the private channel. His Kansai dialect enunciating the last syllable.

“Roger! Medics are already heading your way, Officer L/N,” Officer Takashi replied.

You finally allowed yourself to collapse on the ground, the world slowly fading to black.

When you woke up, you found yourself in a hospital bed. You looked around your new environment, noticing a vase full of fresh flowers and an empty chair to your right.

[♡]

When the meeting adjourned, you lingered behind, ensuring you were the last to leave to avoid a certain vice-captain.

As you turned down the corridor, you heard a familiar voice called out from behind you.

“L/N, can I talk to you for a moment?”

You didn’t bother turning around to find the owner of the voice; you knew that voice all too well.

Memories of his soft whimpers flooded your mind.

“Please y/n. Just one more. Give me one more round. You still have it in you right? Such a good girl.” he purred. You were too fucked dumb to think of a response. All you could hear was the sound of your moans and his sex ramming into yours. “Let me come inside yeah? you feel so fucking good.”

You snapped out of your thoughts, clenching your fists. ”I believe we've covered everything in the briefing. If you want to discuss something else, please schedule a meeting in my office,” you said, saluting and preparing to leave when he interrupted.

“No,” he said firmly.

You stopped in your tracks. “Of course, he will say that.”

“We have more to discuss…about you. You were so reckless yesterday,” he continued.

“Reckless? I would call it a split-second decision,” you snapped back.

The ‘split-second decision’ you referred to was jumping onto the 30-foot kaiju two days ago. You were moments away from watching your platoon mate get incinerated alive by a 1000-degree laser shot down from the kaiju’s mouth— if you can count the fingers coming from the grotesque hole in its face a mouth. Your hands trembled around your rifle, breath coming in shallow gasps. Slowly, fear turned into adrenaline. With a surge of determination, you sprang into action. You sprinted up the walls of the nearest building. “Faster! You have to be faster.” Once in the air, you got a clear shot of its nape. You quickly aimed and fired your rifle at it, the blast tearing away a large chunk of flesh, revealing its core. But that wasn’t enough. You darted around its legs, exhausting yourself by taking as many shots at any exposed flesh as possible, aiming to restrict its mobility.

“If that thick skull of yours remembers, without me being ‘reckless’, we wouldn’t have found the core and wear it down,” you said.

“Not at the cost of your life! We would have found it eventually,” he argued.

“If not mine, then it could have been one of my platoon’s. Or yours," you said, looking down.

Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed a flicker of softness in his eyes. He took a deep breath before continuing.

“It’s not just ambushing the kaiju by yourself. You exhausted yourself saving everyone yesterday and still wanted to run over to back me up. You’re overworking yourself, y/n.” he switched back to the name he used in private. “You used to be so cautious, calculating your movements before making them. What changed?”

You. You made me change.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed. Since our separation, you’ve been bottling your emotions. Again. You get agitated and restless easily, staying up later to train or finish your work. You’ve been shutting yourself in your office for days. If not for the recent Kaiju attack, you wouldn’t have come out of your shut hole for 2 weeks straight.”

You narrowed your eyes at him.

“What does my behavior have to do with you? Last time I remember, unless I was a walking kaiju, you had no interest in me,” you said, refusing to turn around.

You planted your feet firmly because you knew deep down, one look at him would make you lose it and crawl back to him. You couldn’t afford to make that mistake again.

You stepped forward, about to walk away, when you felt his hand grasp your wrist—the same calloused hand that used to caress the small of your back as you were talking to him, listening attentively while gazing softly at you.

“y/n,” he pleads softly. “Please turn around and look at me. I’m worried about you.”

A moment of silence hung between you.

“I…I know I haven’t been the best boyfriend. I continuously prioritized work over you, so much so that I ended up pushing myself away from you. I’m sorry for how it ended. But I—” He stopped himself, swallowing hard. “I just want you to know that every relationship is different…but ours was my favorite.”

You blink back your tears furiously, tearing your arm from his grasp. “I can't let him tear down my walls. After all my effort to keep it up.”

“Don’t act like you know me,” you said, venom dripping from every word.

Finally, you turned to look him in the eye for the first time during the whole interaction. He was about to let out a sigh of relief until he noticed your slightly red eyes and the fierce glare. The intensity of your glare combined with your words sent a shiver down his spine.

Without another word, you saluted and strode down the hallway.

As you walk away, you hear a quiet, almost inaudible sigh escaping from him.

As much as you want to hide your feelings behind guarded walls, you know yourself too well. You can't keep up the facade for long. You’re an emotionally reserved person. Just because you don’t let your emotions out in front of others, doesn’t mean you don’t struggle to hold everything inside.

For fear that if someone sees through your defenses, they'll realize just how vulnerable you truly are

A skill mastered and developed from your constantly fighting parents.

In recent weeks, you've been finding ways to stay grounded. You avoid eye contact, clench your fists once a small memory comes up, and you breathe a little bit more deeper than usual.

These mechanisms have been working. Everyone around you, your closest friends and your family hadn’t noticed it.

After five months of keeping it in, five months of suppressing unprocessed emotions, and five fucking months of pretending everything was fucking perfect in front of everyone. And it took that bastard one minute to unravel it all.

Somehow, Hoshina managed to pick up the signs of you ever so falling apart from a 15-minute meeting. His squinty eyes watched silently as you stared into blank space during a superior's briefing, your small hands clenching into fists intermittently, and noticed the slight, deeper inhales you took.

[♡]

You spent another night in your office, buried in paperwork. Ironically, you had finished it all the night before, but with no new assignments, you decided to look through them again.

This had become a routine occurrence.

You find that it makes better use of your time (than laying awake in your bed, tears soaking your pillow)

As your eyes scanned the words on the pages, you started to feel yourself not making sense of each word. You feel your lids getting heavier and heavier as you repeatedly reread the blurry paragraph. Inevitably, sleep overtook you.

Then, abruptly, you snapped awake.

You couldn’t pinpoint what had stirred you.

As you shifted your hand to rest your head against it, you felt something heavy weighing against your shoulders.

“That’s weird. I don’t recall carrying my blanket.” you thought, glancing over to the couch where it previously was.

To be continued.

#kaiju no. 8 #hoshina soshiro x reader #fluff #angst #exes to lovers #kn8 #Spotify

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jjkamochoso · 7 months ago

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Imagine… Soshiro Hoshina Finding You on the Brink of Death

Angst, Hurt/No Comfort

Soshiro Hoshina x gn!reader

Warnings: mentions of injuries, ivs, death

Part two with fluff can be found here!

It looked to be the end of the line for you. Your Defense Force suit had long overheated, leaving you exhausted and vulnerable in your solo fight against the kaiju. The oversized monster saw how weak you were, becoming even more excited at the prospect of devouring yet another human. You kept shooting its snarling face in your desperation, round after round bouncing off its armored body since you wielded no extra power. The kaiju’s tail whipped around in a flash, hitting your slow moving body in the abdomen and making your gun fly from your grip. You were now splayed on the ground, unable to run and barely able to breathe. You didn’t want to give up but things were utterly hopeless. Your communications had been down the entire time of your 1 on 1 skirmish and your team had no idea where you were, you having been separated from them for far too long at that point. The kaiju strolled over to you, an aura of bloodlust surrounding it as it snatched you up in its jaw. You had no fight left in you—you just hoped your head would go first before all your bones were snapped.

“No more dinner for you tonight, you ugly shit.”

Was that… Soshiro? He came for you? You heard the faint unsheathing of swords as your eyes closed, ready to pass out. In its anger at being disrupted, the kaiju dropped you from its mouth and you tumbled onto the asphalt. The last thing you saw was a blur of violet hair and a whole lot of kaiju blood.

It was almost totally quiet when you came to again, save for the wheezing of your labored breaths. The sun was hanging high in the hazy sky and the weather was perfect--not too hot, not chilly at all. You wondered what Soshiro was up to. Was he still fighting the kaiju? You smiled at the thought. He was always so brave, the first one to jump into action. The relief you felt when he showed up to save you was insurmountable, though you probably weren't going to survive with your extensive injuries if you didn't see a doctor soon. What you wouldn't give to see his face again for the last time. No matter, the memories that you had together were more than enough for you. Maybe it was better this way. You couldn't imagine him setting eyes on your condition right now, you didn't want to burden him with your death. You prayed to whatever spiritual guide to let you pass before someone found your body; there was no way you'd let him lecture you about being more careful as you died.

"Vice Captain! They're still alive!"

You sighed as much as your broken body would allow. With Kafka around, your peaceful death plans would have to wait.

"Y/n, stay with us. Don't fall asleep, okay?"

His kind voice, though loud, was a welcome sound. Even still, your eyes were struggling to stay open as your head lolled around, but now your body was being maneuvered by someone whose touch had become a familiar comfort--

"Soshiro," you muttered, opening your eyes to find bright purple irises boring into your own. "Did you kill it?"

"Kill it? He obliterated that thing!" exclaimed Kafka, excitedly gesticulating. "He was all, swoosh with the swords and the honju was like, ahhh! Don't dice me up! But Vice Captain was like too bad, you should've thought of that before putting your hands on my y/n-"

"That's enough, Hibino."

"Yes, sir. I'll just, uh... stand over there."

Kafka ran off without another word, leaving you in the arms of the man you loved most.

"You’re my knight in shining kaiju armor," you choked out, trying to get a laugh from Soshiro, but he wasn't having any of it as he patched up your external injuries the best he could with his field first aid kit.

"I almost lost you, y/n. You almost died because I was too slow."

"Soshiro, that's not..." The blood you coughed up mixed with the blood on Soshiro's uniform.

"I know this might be selfish of me, but I can't let you die because I can't live without you. I don't want to live a life that doesn't have you in it. I would do anything for you." He placed a large bandage on a cut on your face, letting his fingertips rest there for longer than necessary before getting back to the task at hand. "I remember you said all those years ago you would do anything for me, too. Would you please hang in there and survive this? For me? For… us?”

He was right, you did say that. It was about a year after you both joined the Defense Force. You were both underdogs and no one seemed to believe in you and your abilities, except for each other. You had bonded over being underestimated and swore to each other that you’d never leave one another behind, in anything. He very obviously made good on that promise today.

You coughed up more blood and you could see the worry and pain in Soshiro’s gaze as he looked upon you, lying in his arms like a broken doll. He so gently wiped away the tears that were falling down your cheeks.

“It-everything hurts,” you whimpered.

“I know, I know it does. But we’re gonna get you the help you need, okay?”

You didn’t respond, causing Soshiro’s heart to plummet.

“Y/n. No, no, no, you gotta wake up. C’mon, this isn’t funny,” he pleaded, tapping your face, but getting no response.

“Shit! Hibino!” he yelled, trying his best to stay composed. “We need medic right now! Y/n won’t wake up!”

“Coming right now, Vice Captain!”

Sure enough, a doctor came rushing over, immediately placing down a stretcher. Soshiro loaded your unmoving body onto the hard plastic and he couldn’t help but think of how fragile you looked. Normally you were such a bright light in his life and a formidable ally not easily defeated, but right now, you looked one step from death’s door. He and Kafka dropped you off in an ambulance, ivs immediately being pumped into your veins. As those doors closed, Soshiro getting one last look of the love of his life, he prayed to whoever would listen that the door hadn’t closed on the opportunity to tell you how he truly felt.

PART TWO

#soshiro hoshina x reader #hoshina soshiro x reader #soshiro hoshina #Soshiro hoshina angst #kn8 x reader #kaiju no 8 x reader #kaiju no. 8

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nyarumie · 5 months ago

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Ruined Flowers, Beautiful Flowers.

hoshina soshiro x f!reader — 3.6k words. Mentions of stabbing, reader had an outburst, attempt at angst, established friendship, extreme fluff at the end because i cant stand making my characters suffer. Not proofread!

Author's Note: It's my first time writing something involving drama, feedbacks are highly appreciated! I tried my best and got carried away with the length. 💔

Author's Reply: A request from anon here. Kinda hit way too close to home when you said reader is afraid of falling in love 😭 (also guys pls send me Narumi stuff too I want to make more content for my guy)

Ask box is open! Also cross-posted on ao3.

Cheers erupted from your platoon, exhausted strength from the fight seemingly replenished as you dealt the final blow to the Honju once again. Their eyes sparkled with victory, anticipation filling the air as they immediately chatter to plan another celebration for your win. Familiar words of praise reach your ears, but none of them truly reach your heart. What's there to praise about when you're just doing work as expected?

You offer a soft smile to your platoon who is now approaching you, finally engaging yourself in chatter. You were never one for loud occasions, but you have a reputation to keep. They went on about your elegant strikes in battle, your speed and agility that beats even the fastest of lightning, and the reputable “silent, but deadly” strides you have.

“Man, I sure would always keep my distance from our platoon leader! Might get caught up in her Kaiju kill with how silent she attacks, y'know?” one of them joked, a series of awed agreements emerging from the others.

That's right, keep your distance. Getting too close… might just kill anyone.

You close your eyes as you listen, basking in the enthusiasm exuding from your officers. To them, the hushed strides you've perfected in battle is nothing more than a technique. To you, it's just the one thing that keeps your peace, and no one will be able to understand it the way you do.

Except, there's this one person—too persistent for your liking, so much more than your comrades asking you to mentor them. Scratch that, he's not persistent; he's simply way too highly attentive, it scares you just how much about you he already had figured out.

From a distance stands Hoshina Soshiro, the esteemed Vice Captain of the division you belong to. His watchful eyes never miss anything. You fail to ignore his all too familiar peering gaze even as you try to indulge yourself in the antics of your platoon. You don't understand, you never will. Why does he desperately want to unravel you? Closing your eyes really was the best option. That way, you'll avoid making eye contact with him lest he sees through you again, as if he's starting to pick up the puzzle pieces bit by bit. Curiosity getting the best of you, you peeked one eye open to see what he's up to.

Ah, he's now making his way to you. Well, damn him.

Concluding that you have no escape from what's about to come, you sighed and bid your platoon a (short) farewell, leaving them the promise of a celebratory feast tonight. You walked and met him halfway.

Vice Captain Hoshina was already grinning from ear to ear when you neared him, as if he wasn't mentally piercing through your own mind moments ago. You pouted. In an instant, his arm is heavily draped over your shoulder, his other hand playfully ruffling your hair.

A series of complaints were heard from you, only causing him to let out devilish laughs and made an even more mess of your hair.

“Vice Captain! It took me almost an hour to fix and style my hair, and we have a celebration to attend later!” you complained, begging him to stop.

“Fine, fine! Ya did another excellent job today. No wonder Captain Ashiro always trusts you a hella bunch.” he said, satisfied with today's operation. “However…”

And there he goes.

He stood too near you, still hearing clearly enough despite how hushed his voice became. “You're a lot worse today. Still not spillin' the beans? I'm your closest friend here, ya know?��

You looked away from him, finding a car ruined to smithereens apparently far more interesting than whatever this is right now. “Must be your imagination. The Honju just so happened to be tougher today.”

Lie. Today's Honju had a lower fortitude compared to last time. You both know that. And you both know there's no fooling him from what he saw.

You stood atop the Kaiju's corpse after neutralizing it. Back facing everyone, holding your head up high. To the rest of the Division, you were basking in your victory, trying to keep your breath steady after all the action that took place. But there was no fooling Soshiro's eyes.

His keen gaze traveled over your entire figure. Breath ragged, chest heaving as if deprived of oxygen, a clenched grip on your thin, sharp sword forged akin to that of a rapier—in contrast with your lax hand holding your pistol, careful to not fire a shot. You looked like you were in complete agony and exasperation. Soshiro knows that you were heavily sobbing. Silently. Alone. Exactly how you do things your way.

You were only snapped out of your unrest when cheers finally erupted from your platoon. The smile you offer, to a stranger's eyes, is soft and gentle. To him, it's sad—as if it was a struggle for you to smile wide without hesitancy. Your deadly silence in battle wasn't so silent today at all. He can hear it far too well, that each slash of your blade and each shot of your pistol is accompanied with restlessness, each attack heavier than the last.

The Honju has been reported to have no vitals detected, but you kept slashing and shooting, ‘just in case’. Outrageous. You were literally taking out whatever storm is in your head to the Honju's corpse. Not that he minded the Honju, but he cared for you. He is your friend, you can pour your heart and mind out on him instead of a corpse of a monster. Why won't you? Why is the inside of your mind much more different from what you show others? How do you do it?

He doesn't understand. Or maybe he does, but you won't let him in. He wants to be with you, even at your lowest. And he's already failing.

“I see. If the Honju is indeed tougher today,” he started, “then report to me later, Platoon Leader. Post-celebratory report will do. Take it easy for now.”

Was he upset? He rarely addresses you by your position. You carefully turned your head back to him, afraid that he's finally fed up with your bullshit. You're insufferable. Maybe one day he'll ask you to serve another Division. But instead, you see him grace you with a real, soft smile. It makes you want to cry.

'Take it easy for now.' You wish you could unhear it. You hate how easy his words always go through you. How can you take it easy when you try so hard to not be a burden? You don't want him to know any more than he already does.

“...I've no need for rest. But thank you.” You finally feel the tiredness creeping its way through your system.

Post-neutralization banquets are rare, happening annually at most. Somehow, your platoon members managed to smooth talk their way in securing an approval for tonight's celebration. For what, you don't know.

Everyone had their eyes on you when you entered the hall, bright smiles and expectant faces greeting you. This unnerved you, knowing full well what they're requesting with their doe, puppy eyes.

“Ahem. If you're expecting a heartwarming speech, I'm not the person for the job. You all should wait for the Vice Captain for that.” you said, earning a handful of groans from your members.

A hand suddenly lightly ruffled your hair, an action you’ve grown quite accustomed to. “Wait no more! Allow me to handle things, then!” the Vice Captain cheerfully said. Taking this as your cue to sit down, you excused yourself from him, feeling his slightly disappointed gaze trailing you as you sit.

Cheers echoed from the team as he finished his short spiel, everyone’s hunger evident as they hurriedly fill their plates with food. Your tablemates are no different, they're rushing here and there to get the best pieces of meat and pour each other some drinks. You decided to wait, not wanting to contribute to the mess the hall has become.

A plate filled with juicy meat and a bowl of your favorite stew was placed in front of you. Now someone is also taking up your space? About to reprimand whoever placed them in your eating area, you looked up to see that it was just the Vice Captain.

“Eat up. Keep waitin’ for the chaos to calm down and ya will be left with nothin’ to munch on.” He sat beside you, carrying his own set of food.

“Thanks. But I can grab my own fill just fine.” That's what you said, but still started eating what he gave you.

“Mhm… Just accept it in earnest. You never happily accepted any help I offered ya.”

“That’s because no one can give me the help I need.” you absentmindedly said, almost mumbling to yourself. Soshiro remained silent, now looking at you instead of his food. Maybe you shouldn't have said that. “... Let's just eat.”

As the end of the celebration approached, he wanted to test the waters; he got up and collected the plastic flowers adorning the tables, wrapping them around a ribbon he miraculously spotted somewhere—his own version of a small, makeshift bouquet.

He sat down beside you again, earning your attention. You raised your brow at him upon seeing the makeshift bouquet in his hand, a silent question about what he's up to.

“Ta-da! They aren't the real deal, but I did a pretty good job, won't ya say? This one's yours, ya look good with it.” He made a gesture for you to take the flowers, which you did, studying it closely for a while.

“Vice Captain, you shouldn't be taking the establishment’s props.” you said, frowning. “We should get back to your office. Let's get today's report over with.”

Internally sighing, he doesn't know if you're purposely acting dense or just straight up ignoring his subtle advances. Maybe he needs to tell you outright. You once told him that words and actions come hand-in-hand.

It's surprisingly cold tonight even through the heat of the celebrations. He went outside the hall, leaning against the corridor’s wall to wait for you. You told him you have unfinished business to take care of, which is scolding your far too drunk officers who took their drinking competition to another level. Groans and wails from the inside resounded through the door, probably from officers begging you to lighten their punishment.

Finally, he saw you stepping out of the hall. No makeshift bouquet in hand spotted. “Where’d ya put it?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“Oh, the flowers? I told you we’re not supposed to take them. So I kinda dismantled the ribbon and put them back in place…” you said, looking away guiltily.

That surprisingly stung, despite knowing you didn't want to intentionally hurt him. He knows you’d leave it there, but dismantling them is another. He struggled putting it all together, after all.

“Makes sense. Let's get the report done.” he smiled, ruffling your hair again. This time, it's his way of saying ‘it’s okay, don't feel guilty about it’.

You threw him a look of concern, the playfulness absent from his smile. “I didn't—”

“Are ya cold?” he suddenly asked. Before you can even answer, he removed his work jacket and draped it over your shoulders. “Please put the sleeves on. Yer hands are shakin’ so bad.”

Oh, you didn't even notice. Silently, you put them on as he asked. It's so… large. And oddly comforting. You hated it, somehow. The sleeves extend way beyond your hands and it would look like a mini dress if zipped up.

Satisfied with this, the Vice Captain started walking, pace slow. You followed suit, opting to walk behind him. You looked confused. You feel overwhelmed. Why is he always doing so much? You prefer your friendly banters, the idiotic laughter you share with each other after stupid musings; you dislike the foreign feeling and lingering intention in each action he does towards you. You don't understand.

He once gave you a poetry book about flowers, saying it was like a reflection of yourself. It wasn't. You told him to stop mocking you.

You never asked for company on boring work days, but he was somehow finding his way towards you, offering an invitation to train new recruits. He knew you loved helping others, imparting your knowledge and watching them grow. You turned him down, saying he's more than capable of mentoring them himself.

Once, you were feeling a bit too competitive. Your platoon urged you on, daring you to make a bet with the Vice Captain. The losing platoon must prepare a banquet according to the winning platoon’s wishes. He can hit you in your sword sparring as many times as he can, but hit him once in the given time limit and you win. But you just so happen to miraculously strike him at the last second. He lost on purpose. But you didn't attend the banquet.

Then a tragedy occured. A citizen hiding from the Honju was left undetected, causing you to accidentally inflict a fatal wound on them as you attacked the Honju. Had you known, you would've prioritized their safety. He didn't have to cover this up. He was there. He should be reprimanding you. You were at a loss then.

You bump into his figure, letting out a sound of surprise. You were already inside his office? Perhaps your mind has been too occupied all the way here, you don't even know if he said something on the way here or when he opened the door for you.

Soshiro looked too serious at the moment. You shouldn't have agreed to report to him, because the Honju being tougher today is bullshit. This leaves you with nothing to report, and god you want to miraculously vanish into thin air at this instant.

“What's goin’ on in that li’l head of yours? It's unlike ya to get so out of focus.” he asked, crossing his arms.

“Vice Captain. I’d like to proceed with the report, please.”

“But ya don't have anything to report. I saw it well with my own two eyes.”

He can barely hear you, your voice only a mere whisper. “...Then report to me instead, Soshiro.”

He walked closer to you, your breath almost stopping. Why is it like this?

"What do ya want to know? I'll give you everything."

Your fists clenched in frustration at his words. He's doing this on purpose, saying something that totally means another.

“Why… Why do you insist on staying by my side? Why do you care so much? I don't understand. You're my friend, but you're doing so much for just a friend. Why do you do these things? The book—the poetry book you once gave me, saying it reminded you of me—it doesn't make sense! It's full of flowery words, it speaks of beauty, but none of those are me. You’ve seen what mess of a person I am. You say you’d give me everything, but I can't even give you a single thing, Soshiro!”

You grabbed the front of his shirt, lowering your head as you failed to stop the tears from flowing.

“You should've let me rot in bed when you found me in a sickly state. Should've reported me to the higher ups for making a careless mistake. Should've distanced yourself from me, I did nothing but unintentionally hurt you when all you wanted was to look out for me.”

You bit your lip, not wanting to spill more than you should've. A warm pair of arms went around you, causing you to cry harder, your body relaxing against your wishes.

“I see. Do my actions confuse you?” he softly asked.

“...I can't accept them.”

“That doesn't answer my question.”

Still sobbing, you answered, “I don't know. You confuse me. I don't want to rely on anyone. I don't know what to make of them. I hate the lingering, unspoken intentions. I hate not understanding. I hate pushing you away, but it feels overwhelming when you're too close. I hate the comforting feeling you give me. Please don't waste your energy on me. I’m filled with dirt, my hands are covered in more blood than you know about.”

You’ve never spilled this much before, Soshiro noted. He thinks that's a lot to unpack, but he has all the time in his hands to walk you through it. You were a ticking time bomb, the impending explosion only delayed by taking out your anguish on all the Kaiju you’ve slayed.

Soshiro caressed the back of your head, speaking. “Then I’ll help ya understand. I like you and I like bein’ with ya, even if you think otherwise. If you don't wanna rely on me, then don't. But I’ll be here when ya need me. I’ll walk you through everythin’ slowly if you’ll allow me. And I still think you're as beautiful as the flowers I keep tellin’ you about.”

He tried holding your hand. You pulled it away when you felt his, but he insisted. “And these bloodied hands ya speak of, tell me more, please? The stains might be impossible for you to wash away, but I’ll gladly hold ‘em still.”

He isn't the type to deliberately fool others, even if he humors himself with being a menace to others. You looked at him and was met with surprise as you were met with the soft pair of red eyes and gentle smile you’ve deniably always found comfort in. Were you deserving of this, even after unintentionally turning him away?

You let out a shaky breath, bracing yourself to recall a scenario that has haunted your mind for years.

“A Kaiju attack. Was a yonju. It was small, but I can tell it's dangerous. Grabbed anything sharp, anything heavy I can get my hands on. I closed my eyes and kept swaying my makeshift weapon around, in hopes of defending myself. I know my sister was hiding somewhere, but it all happened too fast. I heard a piercing scream right in front of me. The yonju had found her somewhere and used her as its shield. I didn't know that even a yonju could think of that. I… accidentally stabbed my sister. She died. I should’ve kept my eyes open. I was weak and was only 14 then. Today's neutralization location is the exact same spot where it happened.”

Tears filled your eyes again. “The day… when I accidentally hit a hiding civilian. I felt my mind shut down. The same scenario replayed over and over again. Had it not been for you, both I and the civilian would've been long gone now. I was only able to take a breath when they got stabilized by the medical team.”

“I’m sorry. I understand if you don't want to involve yourself with me anymore. But thank you for… being my friend.”

Instead of letting you go, you felt his arm wrap even tighter. “I told ya, didn't I? I’ll walk with ya through everythin'. What happened then doesn't make you any less of a person in my eyes. You’ve saved more lives than any of us can count. I’m sure yer sister will be immensely proud of ya.”

"And! I haven't kept my end of the deal for our bet. Ya didn't attend the banquet for it."

How persistent. But he's always been like this. It comforts you, how he's still being Soshiro even after your heavy outburst.

You cleared your throat. “You said you like me.”

“Mhm? And what about it?”

“...I’m sorry for unintentionally pushing you away, or if I was rude sometimes. I didn't know how to handle it.”

He let out a laugh of relief. “Dear, that was nothin’ at all! Ya don't have to reciprocate, I only wanted to do what I can for ya. That won't change anytime soon.”

Back to his playful self, he let you go and squished your tear-stained cheeks. “I’ll go with ya anywhere, even if it's straight to hell.”

What a fast turnaround of mood. You don't mind it, though. There's no use drowning in your anguish. You wanted to get better.

You frowned. “Don't want you to go to hell, ‘Shiro.”

“Was kiddin’. Get some rest?”

You tiredly nodded at him, eyes heavy. “Vice Captain. I’m officially giving you a chance. At the same time, I’ll start getting better.”

He shot you an incredulous look. “My title? Really now? Fine then, Platoon Leader, as a reward for taking your first step, let me bestow this upon ya. Close your eyes.”

What is he up to now? You’ll punch him with no hesitation if he kisses you on your lips.

You felt something cold wrap around your wrist, his own hand gripping the back of yours.

“Open up.” He held up your hand to your face level. It's a floral bracelet. He always loves associating you with flowers. You don't understand why, but someday you know you will.

“Perfect match, ain’t it? Now, for the cherry on top…”

His next move took you by surprise. With no hesitation, he kissed your palm. “There. I hope that wasn't too much?”

Receiving no reply, his eyes snapped to your face, worried if he overstepped his newly established boundary.

The sight that greeted him was something to behold. You were looking at anything but him, unable to control the redness of your face. Ah, so that was quite the shot to your heart then?

“Hello? Earth to you?”

“I’m fine! It's okay! Just… not used to it. Do give me a warning next time for my sake, please. And we're not yet in a relationship, mind you.” you said, shyness still evident.

He heartily laughed, still not letting go of your hand. “I’ll walk ya back to your room now. The princess needs her long needed quality sleep.”

And sure enough, it was indeed the most peaceful night you’ve ever had.

#kaiju no. 8 #axia writes for fun #kn8 x reader #kn8 writing #kaiju number 8 #soshiro hoshina #hoshina soshiro x reader #hoshina x reader #hoshina #hoshina soshiro #hoshina fluff #hoshina angst

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elliada · 6 months ago

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Alternate Universe: In which Kafka self-sacrifices during the final battle.

#Kaiju No. 8 #Kn8 #Kaiju No. 8 Spoilers #(this is totally fabricated but I'm tagging spoilers just in case)#(mostly for the first two pictures)#tw blood #anyway today I woke up and chose violent angst lmao #kinda satisfied with the result #(however if this scenario ever happens in the manga i'm ending myself :))#Hibino Kafka #Hoshina Soshiro #hoshikaf #kafhoshi #manga edit #mine: edits

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mylove-iv · 7 days ago

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⠀𐔌 . ⋮ promised to me .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱

ʚ imperial guard! hoshina soshiro x fem! reader ɞ

synopsis: you are presented to the Emperor of Japan in marriage to better your clan's standing and boost the Imperial family's backing. hoshina soshiro is your assigned escort, guarding you day and night yet turmoil brews in him as he comes to realize that his heart yearns for you, the bride-to-be of the Emperor.

genres: romance, a smidge of angst.

content warnings: unclear timeskips, mild descriptions of blood, mild depictions of abuse (not from soshiro), morally grey! soshiro ૮꒰ྀི⊃⸝ ⸝ ⸝⊂꒱ྀིა.

word count: 3.15k words.

author's note: ngl, this was supposed to be a more dark! soshiro fic but he turned out more grey haha ᡣ𐭩.

‎‧₊ ─ masterlist .ᐟ ༘

When the Emperor called Soshiro for an audience, he wasn't expecting his breath to be taken away.

But as Soshiro looks at you, he found it somehow hard to breathe when you entered his vision, bathed in swathes of the finest silk and rouge painting your lips oh so prettily like camellias blooming in the harsh winter.

And it was as if the words on his tongue suddenly dissolved when you had paid him a small yet sweet smile, your eyes ever so kind.

But it was your smile that seemed the most unforgettable to him.

He was hypnotized and completely enamored but he's startled from his thoughts when the Emperor then introduces you as Lady Fujiwara, his promised bride to help him solidify the Emperor’s seat and someone Soshiro is tasked with guarding.

Hoshina Soshiro, head of the Imperial Guard, knows that coveting something that does not belong to him would be a crime with the price of seppuku and his clan’s honor being tarnished. He knows better than to fall prey to his greed, he knows.

Yes. He thinks as he gazes at you. It would be treason.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

Throughout the days that had passed, Soshiro, in his dedication to his Emperor and in his efforts to smother his greed, guarded you silently where ever you went.

But one sunny day in your private garden was he taken aback when you had offered him a seat at your quaint table, insisting he sit for tea.

He sighs through his nose before relenting and a small smile appears on your face as you pour him a cup of tea. “Here,” You pass him a book, to which he recognizes as Tachibana Akemi’s latest book of poetry.

“I mustn’t, my lady.” He gently holds it back to you, words firm and unyielding.

You don’t spare him another glance as you flip another page of the current book you’re reading. “I saw you eyeing it while I was reading it yesterday, Hoshina-san.” You murmur softly, a teasing lilt accompanying your words.

Soshiro’s eyes widen and as he’s about to apologize, you huff a small laugh. “Don’t apologize or I’ll be upset.” At your words does Soshiro zip his lips shut.

Your smile widens as your eyes twinkle forcing Soshiro swallows thickly, “You’re my personal escort, Hoshina-san, I think the distance between us is no longer needed, no?”

Your gaze is insistent until Soshiro relents, sighing silently before flipping to the first page and only then do you beam brightly, pushing your plate of strawberry daifuku in his direction as he thumbs the dried camellia flower you tucked between the pages to act as a bookmark.

And before he knows it, the silence between you completely dies down as you discuss the meanings of Tachibana’s poems, the ice between you breaking and is replaced with an air of comfort and ease.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

A couple of weeks had passed since you arrived from Kyoto, settling in the Imperial Palace nicely as Soshiro strode ten steps behind you, his katana strapped to his waist securely as his vermillion eyes never strayed from your form.

But the harsh thuds of arrows hitting their wooden marks rouses him from his staring as he sees you gazing at the archers in the courtyard shooting, longing and nostalgia filling your eyes.

“My lady?” Soshiro hums thoughtfully, his maroon eyes gently tracing then soft curve of your nose before dipping lower to your plush lips.

You’re startled from your reverie before your apologetic eyes fly to meet his, a shy smile adorning your embarrassed face. “My apologies, Hoshina-san. Let’s resume our walk, shall we?”

Silently nodding at your command, Soshiro can’t help but think of the longing that had flooded your gaze when you looked at the archers earlier and before he knows it, the words are tumbling from his lips, “Do you practice the ways of the bow, my lady?”

Sunlight leaking through the shoji doors paint your face beautifully, so much so that it has Soshiro at a loss of words yet it is the bright smile tugging at your lips is what causes his heart to seize momentarily.

“I do. I did,” You trail off, eyes dimming visibly. “Before I was taken here to the capital-“

Soshiro catches your eyes widen at your mistaken and he quickly understands; you, the Emperor’s chosen bride, speaking of the marriage that was arranged against your will to the Emperor’s head guard.

He smiles gently before kneeling before you, his hand encasing yours as he places a soft kiss atop your knuckles, “At ease, my lady, for I will not let any harm come to you, even if it is from the Emperor.” Soshiro promises to you, honest eyes looking up into yours that it has you visibly relaxing.

You bend down slightly before your free hand gently cups Soshiro’s face, your thumb tracing his cheekbone causing his breath to stutter. “Thank you, Hoshina-san. I’ll be in your care.”

Against his better judgement, Soshiro allows himself this moment of respite before he leans into your palm, savoring your warmth.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

Later that night, when the moon is high in the night sky, Soshiro gently rasps his knuckles against your shoji doors. His keen ears pick up on your faint yet sweet, “Come in.”

Allowing himself into your chambers, his vermillion eyes flit over to see your form seated on the engawa, overlooking the garden.

“My Lady,” Soshiro murmurs quietly, willing his heart to stop beating so quickly when you look up at him with a bright smile, your eyes crinkling softly in what he hopes is happiness.

“Hoshina-san, what brings you to my chambers this late?” You ask and when Soshiro brings the arrow and quiver of arrows in hand to your attention, he revels in how your eyes sparkle with excitement.

“For you.” He sends you a cheeky grin that has your cheeks flushing beneath the moonlight.

Smiling oh so sweetly that it has Soshiro’s heart floundering, he swears you’ll give him a heart attack when your hands linger on his briefly as you gently take the bow and quiver from his hands.

And he watches entranced from his seat on the engawa when you shoot consecutive shots hitting their marks, arrows all firmly embedding their heads into the bamboo fences meters away.

“You’ve a good eye and arm, my lady.” Soshiro hums and you turn to him, a cute, mischievous grin on your face that he finds absolutely endearing.

“My tou-san tells me I’m a better archer than my nii-san but hush, don’t tell him I said that.” You tease lightly as he chuckles.

As you settle yourself back on the engawa next to him, Soshiro can’t help but see the stray strands of hair loosened from your ponytail.

Impulsively, Soshiro leans over, his fingers tucking the offending strands behind your ear and his body freezes when you turn towards him, your noses brushing as he had misjudged the distance between you.

Your eyes seemed a bit dazed at the close proximity yet Soshiro can’t help but stay rooted in place, greed unfurling at how close you are.

“This is a sweet gesture I find absolutely endearing, Hoshina-san.” You murmur, smiling sweetly that it has him swallowing thickly.

Almost drunk off the sweet scent of camellias and spiced sugar you emanatw, the words slip between his lips before he knows it. “Soshiro.”

Your smile softens, eyes overflowing with warmth that it has his heart rate spiking. “Then, I’ll be Y/n to you, Soshiro.” His name on your tongue is honeyed and cloying, and his desire to hear his name tumble from your lips more often grows. “Thank you, Soshiro.”

Gently without allowing his eyes to leave yours, he grabs your hand before bringing it up to his lips, placing a sweet kiss to your knuckles.

“Anything for you.” Soshiro whispers reverently, his heart brimming solely of you.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

Days thereafter does Soshiro see an unspoken softness between you both and he isn’t blind to how his heart treacherously leaps whenever a bright and happy smile lights up your face whenever you see him.

Between accompanying you outside on walks, sipping tea beneath the cherry blossoms with a book in your hands, and late night archery competitions between you both, Soshiro unknowingly falls for you amidst haikus, arrows, and fragrant camellias.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

As he stands guard outside the shoji doors of your quarters, they push open before your attendants exit and only then does Soshiro peer into your quarters

His breath suddenly hitches as he sees you dressed in a deep, wine-red houmougi as pearls and golden laced flowers decorated your hair beautifully, your lips and cheeks tinted with rouge that it has Soshiro’s mind blanking.

Beautiful. He finds himself thinking as he holds out a hand for you to take but something feels unsettlingly off.

You settle your hand in his gracefully, your eyes not meeting his. “The Emperor requested my presence at dinner. I assume his duties to the state were fulfilled.” Your words are a quiet murmur, subdued in the way Soshiro knows that isn’t like you.

“Yes, the turf wars in the western regions have been repressed and settled.” Soshiro mutters lowly as he escorts you to the banquet hall, his hand never leaving yours.

“I see.” Your words are nothing but a noncommittal hum. And as you both arrive to the doors to the banquet hall, Soshiro is about to let go of your hand but his eyes widen as you squeeze them gently.

You’re still staring straight ahead at the doors and a beat of silence passes before your tired eyes are meeting his and Soshiro feels a twinge in his chest as he sees an undercurrent of fright in your eyes.

But before he’s able to inquire if you’re feeling okay, you abruptly let go of his hand as your features settle into a collected mien. You nod your head to the door attendant before entering.

Soshiro sees the way the Emperor’s face lights up at the sight of you but he misses how your eyes flare with disgust before dimming. He feels his heart ache and Soshiro is forcefully biting his tongue, the taste of iron startling him back to his senses.

Fool, she is not yours to covet. He chastises himself as the doors slam shut.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

When the dinner came to a close, Soshiro was there offering his hand to escort you back to your quarters yet you walked ahead as an unsettling silence settled between you.

He stares at your back, a flurry of thoughts rushing through his mind as he ponders a way to break the silence as he wishes to hear your thoughts.

Your thoughts of the book you read earlier, the change in season, or the dinner you just had with the Emperor-

I could love you more than he ever could, if I allow myself.

Soshiro’s own traitorous thoughts shock himself as his mind becomes a frenzy of a storm, guilt and greed intertwining in a confusing dance and Soshiro loses himself to the storm in his mind.

But he’s pulled out of the tempest when you gingerly cup his face, his panicked eyes staring into your worried ones.

"Soshiro?" You call softly and his heart seizes.

A chill dances down Soshiro’s spine as the realization slams into him. He’s knows, he’s aware.

Catastrophically aware.

He rips himself from your touch and bids you a quiet farewell, missing the hurt visibly flashing in your eyes.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

Soshiro has been avoiding you and he knows that you know. The air between you has stilled and gone stagnant. And like the coward he is, Soshiro doesn’t even try to mend the burnt bridge between you.

Instead, unknowingly, he adds more fuel to the fire as he orders guard shift changes, rotating with officers under his command to stand by and guard you.

And only when the moon is high in the night sky, does Soshiro stand in to be your guard, away from your kind eyes and unknown to you.

Despite the distance, he still reads the reports noting what you’d done for the day, an odd feeling of longing filling his chest all the while he is ignorant of the dangers you’d faced at the hands of the Emperor while the sun brightly shone.

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

Silently stalking to the guard stationed outside of your quarters, Soshiro motions for the guard shift and his officer in question nods mutely before bowing and walking away.

His wine-red eyes peer at the shoji doors that separate you both before he heaves a silent sigh. You fool. Soshiro thinks bitterly before straightening up.

But the loud crash of porcelain breaking quickly catches his attention and before he knows it, he’s drawing his katana as his other hand slams the shoji doors open.

Your startled and tear-laden eyes meet his panicked red ones and once his mind registers that there’s no immediate threat in the near vicinity and that tears are rolling down your cheeks, his heart begins to ache.

But a surge of rage begins to boil in him as his eyes narrow on the darkened bruise cuffing your wrist.

“What happened?” He mutters lowly, stalking closer and before you’re able to try to cover the offending bruise with the sleeve of your silken juban, he gently grasps your hand.

“Hoshina-san, it’s none of your concern.” You mutter weakly, face turning away from his as you attempt to weakly take your hand back from his grips.

His grip tighten only briefly before he’s grabbing your chin with his free hand, forcing your teary eyes to meet his.

"Who did this to you?" Soshiro murmurs softly, his thumb tracing the bruise.

Your eyes narrow and despite the tears glazing them, he can see how they flare with frustration. “Why do you care?” You snap harshly.

Soshiro’s red eyes flash darkly as he pulls your face close to his, your lips barely brushing. “Why do I care? Why do I care?” He laughs coldly.

“Are you a fool, Y/n?” Soshiro snarls and despite all his attempts to keep his voice level, the desperation in his tone is palpable—almost as if he was pleading. “I—“

“Finish that sentence, Soshiro, I dare you.” You scowl but Soshiro can’t bring himself to even do it.

“Which bastard hurt you?” His voice dips lower, edged dangerously with outrage as he chooses to ignore the previous conversation.

Hurt floods your eyes and he feels you weaken in his hold, your eyes fluttering to a close as tears freely roll down your cheeks. “The Emperor. He was the one to brandish that bruise on me.”

Soshiro stills, his breath catching as his blood runs cold before a heated implosion of rage swelters in him. “A fitting punishment for me attempting to put off the wedding.” You laugh weakly.

His angry eyes flit to yours yet none of the heated fury is not directed to you but that bastard he swore his allegiance to. “Why?”

You look up into his eyes deeply and Soshiro finds himself drowning in them. “Because I fell in love with you and I knew no end to desiring you.”

He swears his heart stops as he registers your words.

Inhaling shakily, you turn away and refuse to meet Soshiro’s eyes. “You have no idea how often I have wished to have you near me.” Your words a weak, broken murmur.

Soshiro can only stare at your face as you continue, “I thought of you softly from time to time. But I knew- I knew that you’d rather cut off your hand before you would ever reach for me.”

He feels dizzy from your words and before Soshiro is able to formulate a cognitive thought, a simple ‘no’ tumbles from his lips.

You shake your head, not allowing yourself the slightest bit of hope, “You swore your allegiance to the Emperor.”

Honor be damned.

Soshiro cups your face softly, forcing your eyes to meet his and his heart feels full. “It no longer matters.” He firmly murmurs, his intense carmine red eyes staring deeply into yours.

He sees your eyes gleam with hope but his heart drops to see them dim, “Regardless of me loving you, Soshiro, the wedding ceremony is tomorrow morning and if I do not marry the Emperor, I will be condemned to seppuku.”

“My loyalty lies with you.” Soshiro whispers softly, his words are a firm promise. “For you are the one I lo-.”

“Don’t, Soshiro.” You pull away from his embrace and his heart aches as you steel your gaze directed at him. “I am not so foolish to damn the man I love to death either.”

┊ ੈ✩‧₊*°࿐ྂ。

Morning had come sooner than you had wished and soon, your attendants swarmed your quarters as they prepared you for your wedding.

Amidst the commotion, you found yourself wishing to see Soshiro once more but you shake the thought off, chastising yourself that it would be his blood on your hands if the truth were to ever reach the Emperor’s ears.

Camellia scented oil was lathered on your skin, rouge dusting your lips and cheek as various golden hair ornaments adorned your hair and before you knew it, you stood in the Shinto Shrine awaiting your future husband.

The weight of the iro-uchikake you’re wearing seems heavier in your heart as the colorful kimono is embroidered with deep-red camellias, an ironic reminder of Soshiro’s bright, vermillion eyes.

But you’re torn from your musings when the doors open and you’re expecting noble men, clan heads, and the Emperor’s cohort to witness the ceremony but you’re confused to see what you recognize as Soshiro’s own battalion of guards flood the shrine chamber.

Their dark formal kimonos all bear the Hoshina clan crest and you spare the Shinto priest an alarmed look as Soshiro’s battalion of soldiers silently stand at guard, not one of the men uttering a single word of explanation.

Your eyes snap to the doors when you hear the Shinto priest gasp and all you see is Soshiro striding towards you with an air of calmness, his ruby eyes solely focused on you.

The men around you salute at the sight of their captain and as Soshiro stalks closer, you see splatters of red painted across his cheek. Yet none of that matters as your heart treacherously thunders at the sight of him so close, almost within reach.

“I am here to take my bride, she was promised to the Emperor.” He murmurs softly as meets you at the podium, kneeling before you as he reaches for your hand, to which he places a sweetened kiss on.

Soshiro smiles against your knuckles, his red eyes flooding with blatant love and devotion and it’s all directed at you.

“I am the Emperor now.”

#𝐢𝐯'𝐬 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠.°♡༉‧₊#kaiju no. 8: gallery of the vice-captain ༉‧₊˚✧#hoshina soshiro x reader #soshiro hoshina x reader #kaiju no. 8 x reader #kaiju no. 8 #kn8 #hoshina soshiro #hoshina soshiro x you #hoshina x reader #soshiro x reader #kaiju no. 8 fluff #kaiju no. 8 angst #kaiju no. 8 fic #hoshina soshiro fic #hoshina soshiro fluff #hoshina soshiro angst

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