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asterkiss · 3 years ago

Note

I'm so sorry about this second ask, I simply have no idea how Tumblr works.

I forgot to put in details... What I meant was— it's like fluff, crack, grudging respect, and angst. (ijustrealizeditseemslikeheckalot—)

But of course, if only you want to write this!! I'm also not wanting to sound demanding or smthn, I'm sorry.

Thank you though! I really am.

I got your fluff, I got your angst, I got all the inbetween. Have a oneshot that was both fun and frustrating to write and as always ended up longer than I intented. (11k, oof).

Posting this here but I’ll re-read it a few times and spruce it up a bit more before posting to my AO3 account. If there are any major differences between versions, I’ll let ya know.

- HONEYPOT

Bill Cipher was a demon.

A member of the First Hierarchy under Lucifer’s rule, his duty involved the capture of human souls to meet his quota. It wasn’t a stretch to say he was one of the best in the business when it came to this sort of thing. He was the top ranked in the Seraphim order after all when it came to collecting souls, and even fellow demons feared him. He’d been #1 for the last three hundred and fifty six years.

And so it was, when the identity of his next target landed in his lap, the demon had no qualms about it. He hadn’t once failed in securing a soul in his thousands of years on the frontlines.

So why would this time be any different?

Mabel Pines, nineteen years old. Born in Piedmont, California alongside her twin brother. An uneventful life so far and nothing special.

‘So what d’ya say kid, ya can have anything you want in the entire world. Fame, fortune, love, ya name it.’

The girl’s attention perked at his words, even as she regarded him warily. The whole introducing yourself as a demon will do that to folk. The two sat in a diner, secluded away in a booth at the back.

‘And you get my soul in return?’

‘Yup! But don’t worry about that part, we won’t collect it until years later. It’s all contained in the paperwork here. So, what ya say, ready to sign the contract?’ He procured a pen and thick bundle of papers from the air, pushing them towards her across the table with a grin. She came off as pretty naïve, so he had no concerns about her signing on. Mabel Pines came off as your typical airhead who acted impulsively without thinking of the consequences – he’d watched her down an entire jar of mayonnaise on a dare just a few days prior.

‘Mhmm, no thanks.’

‘Great, then just sign here–‘

Wait, what.

The blond-haired demon stared at her in bewilderment. Mabel gave him an apologetic smile as she shrugged her shoulders and nudged the contract back towards him. ‘See ya.’

He took the contract wordlessly, staring down at it as if it would offer the answers to the many questions rushing through his mind. When he raised his head, the human had already left.

What the hell just happened?

Turns out that Mabel Pines’ twin brother was an Exorcist in training and a formidable one at that. Heck, multiple relatives of the family had been in that line of work. If he had done his proper recon before approaching the target he would have known but now a days Bill just skipped that altogether. It was just a hassle and he never needed it.

Not until now anyways.

Her family relations to exorcism would explain why her soul was highlighted as being more valuable than your every day run of the mill soul though. Look at all those points her soul would fetch for him, nice.

Unfortunately the teenage girl was close with her brother – sickeningly close actually. Their sibling love for one another made him wanna vomit. What was most irritating was that her brother drilled into her just how deceitful demons were and had apparently made her promise to never make a deal with a demon. Something she had of course agreed to.

Well, it had been a while since he had a challenge.

He could deal with this.

‘Will you leave me alone already?’

‘Not until you sign this contract.’

‘Urgh.’

Two months later and Bill was getting increasingly annoyed with this kid. His top spot on the leader board for soul capture would soon be in threat of being taken if this went on.

‘If you’re so annoyed by my constant presence then tell me, why haven’t ya told Pine Tree about me?’ he goaded with an arched eyebrow.

Mabel frowned. ‘I don’t need Dipper’s help to deal with you.’

Ah, there was that stubborn pride. As a demon he loved it.

‘Really?’ He hovered over her as she sat at her desk, close enough that she could feel his breath on her throat but not so close as to initiate any actual contact. ‘If you really wanted to prove yourself to him I could make that happen. All it would take is one wish-‘

‘I said no!’ she yelled, snapping her head around to face him. Their eyes met and she glowered until apparently realising just how close their faces were. She quickly scooted away and returned her attention to her books, trying desperately to study. Her college work had begun to take a decline ever since her life was invaded by the demon. She knew if she rang Dipper up and explained the situation, he’d hop on the next flight over from Asia but she didn’t want to disrupt his training, not when he’d been so excited to be accepted into the program. It was run by a secret organisation intent on destroying demons and other supernatural entities and their criteria for taking on individuals was super strict. You only got one shot at it.

No, she definitely couldn’t call him. She’d deal with this herself. It wasn’t like she was in immediate danger so long as she didn’t hand her soul over – and that obviously wasn’t going to happen.

She could deal with this herself.

A few days later found Mabel walking around her apartment with sage as she blitzed the place completely. Urgh, she hated this smell. She covered her mouth and nose with the sleeve of her sweater as she walked around the perimeter of her living room.

‘Dang, who died in here?’

She span around, eyes falling upon the blond gentleman standing clear as day in her apartment as the smoke wafted around his frame without effect. What!?

‘No, you’re not meant to be able to come in here!’ she yelled, dropping her arm from her face to glare at him instead. A moment later the girl regretted her actions however when she began coughing over the stench.

‘Hm?’ Bill regarded her spluttering act before noting the burning herb in her hands. ‘Ah, is that sage? Sorry to inform you but it’ll take a lot more than that to get rid of a demon of my calibre.’

She scowled at him. ‘Challenge accepted.’

He grinned.

The next time he stopped by, he flinched when something was hurdled at his face. He managed to avoid it with his abilities, turning around to regard a crucifix laying on the ground behind him.

A sigh. ‘Really?’ he drawled flatly.

The demon turned only to find the brunette stood directly in front of him, gaze intense as she held another crucifix up at him alongside a Bible. ‘The power of Christ compels you!’ she recited.

Bill blinked down at her. ‘Compels me to do what?’

The determination in her gaze wavered. ‘Uh, compels you to… go away?’

He smirked as he leaned down so they were eye to eye, leaning out to poke the crucifix. It snapped in two easily from his simple touch. ‘Not a chance, kid.’

She blinked at the broken artifact in surprise before he smiled warmly and held out a bundle of papers once again. ‘So, about that contract….’

‘Argh!’ She slapped the papers out of his hand causing them to tornado around the pair before fluttering to the ground. Mabel turned on her heel as she retreated to her bedroom.

‘I take it that’s a “no”?’ he called after her breezily, eyes crinkling with mirth at how fun it was to tease her. It took some of the edge off his frustration at her constant refusals.

‘Go to Hell!’

Mabel was desperate.

Which was why she was stood in her apartment with Gideon Gleeful in tow, her college classmate looking far too keen to be here.

‘Again, thank you so much darling for the invite. It made me happier than a clam at high tide!’

‘Sure, no problem,’ Mabel replied, trying not to grimace. She’d had to agree to go on a date with him if he helped her out here. Urgh. ‘So, about that exorcism…’

‘Oh, yes!’ The boy smiled warmly as he clapped his hands together. ‘Let’s begin shall we and get rid of those pesky demons invading your space.’ He chuckled as he dropped his backpack and began pulling out various items. Five minutes later and he’d placed down a tarp in the living room where he’d drawn various runes and symbols on in chalk, sitting cross-legged before it with a book in hand. ‘If you’d just be a dear for me and light the candles? Any entity in this place will get trapped in this circle here, guaranteed.’

‘Sure.’ She took the lighter and tended to the candles positioned around the tarp. She really hoped this worked. Once done, she stood a few feet behind the boy and allowed him to do his thing.

Gideon cleared his throat before speaking with his book in hand. ‘O’ demon that haunts this place, I demand thee show yourself before us now!’

Mabel glanced around the room nervously, but nothing happened. Gideon seemed undeterred however as he spoke again, louder this time. ‘If any demon or ghost or other entity is present, I demand thee appear this second!’

…Still nothing.

The boy waited for several moments before glancing back at her with a small smile. ‘There’s nothing here, darling.’

Mabel scowled. ‘He’s here, dammit.’ She took a few steps forward. ‘Bill, quit hiding and show yourself!’

‘Sup.’

Mabel jumped, spinning around to find Bill standing there casually and not inside the rune circle as he was meant to. He smiled at her. ‘Calling for me, are we? Did you finally decide to make a deal?’ His smile waned when he noted she wasn’t alone. ‘Who’s Shortstack over there?’

When Mabel glanced Gideon’s way she was caught back by the horrified expression upon his face. He’d gone paler than a ghost. The boy quickly backpedalled, holding up his book. ‘D-D-Demon! It’s a real demon!!’

Mabel wasn’t sure why he looked so terrified. Sure, Bill was a demon but he just looked like an ordinary guy.

But unbeknownst to her Gideon saw more than that. His heart leapt into his throat as he watched the dark amalgamated form standing at the other side of the room. A large, sinister red eye stared from the shadows as several pairs of tendril-like arms covered the room. In addition, a black serpent-like tongue flicked from behind several sharp rows of teeth, and each breath released a cloud of dark smoke.

This was way beyond his pay grade – and here he thought Mabel had made up the whole thing as an excuse to go out with him!

Meanwhile, Mabel regarded Gideon with concern. He looked bad. ‘Gideon, are you alright?’

The boy suddenly screamed bloody murder, leaping up and all but flying out the apartment. Her front door collided against the wall with a thunderous bang and she wondered if he’d actually broken the thing with how hard he slammed the thing open.

‘What the heck?’ she asked, bewildered. She glanced back towards Bill who seemed very amused right now. As if feeling her gaze upon him, he glanced her way. ‘Yes?’

She narrowed her eyes, prodding him in the chest. ‘What did you do to him?’

‘I didn’t do anything,’ he replied easily. ‘It’s not my fault he’s more attuned than others to the supernatural and can see certain things that would otherwise be hidden. There’s a reason I keep my true form hidden.’

Mabel regarded him suspiciously. ‘Show me it.’

‘Hm?’

She folded her arms. ‘Show me your true form, I wanna see it.’

Bill’s smile faded. ‘No.’

‘I’ll consider making a deal with you if you do.’

He scoffed. ‘You’re a bad liar.’ Eyes narrowing, he took a step forward to leer down at her. Some of the bravado in her expression wavered as he loomed over her frame and she swallowed.

‘I’m here to charm you, not scare you,’ he explained, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. ‘You catch more flies with honey than vinegar, after all.’

Mabel wanted to say something but found herself rooted to the spot beneath his intense gaze.

‘But…’ he went on, gaze darkening. ‘I’m not known for my indefinite patience. The honey pot is very close to running out on our relationship Shooting Star, and when that happens you’ll find out just how terrifying I can be.’

She continued to stare up at him with wide eyes, and for the first time since meeting the demon she felt a sense of trepidation ensnaring her. He kept his stoic expression a few minutes more before it melted, lips quirking into a charming smile and gaze softening as he took a step back. But it didn’t matter now, she’d been given a peek at what lay beneath that façade and now she knew it was all a lie.

‘I’d reconsider my offer if I were you,’ he said, turning on his heel to leave. ‘My current terms will only be available for a limited time, thereafter you’ll find you won’t be provided such generous conditions.’

He left her be and Mabel was alone.

And she was scared.

She did something she hadn’t done in a while – she called her great uncles Stanley and Stanford. She hadn’t spoken with them in a while. As kids, she and Dipper had spent a few summers with them but then Stanley and Stanford went travelling the globe in the retirement, and the past few years Dipper seemed to have followed in stride for his training. She was the only Pines girl still in California.

‘Hello?’

‘Grunkle Stan, hey!’

‘Who is this? I’m not giving you any money.’

‘It’s me? Mabel? You’re favourite great niece?’

‘Oh! Hey kid, how ya doing? Been a while since I heard your voice.’

Mabel smiled, she should call more often. ‘Yeah. How are you and Grunkle Ford?’

‘Doing good! Currently in Paris, the locality are stuck up snobs but they do great food and- huh?’ Stanley spoke to someone else. ‘It’s Mabel, she’s calling to see how we are. One second, let me figure out how to put this blasted thing on speaker. Uh….’

After much back and forth they managed it and Mabel grinned into the phone. ‘Hey Grunkle Ford, how are you?’

‘I’m doing well, why the sudden call though?’

Mabel paused. ‘Um, well…’ She cleared her throat. ‘You two were Exorcists for a long while, right?’

There was a pause. ‘Yes,’ Stanford replied, voice serious. ‘Though for the past five years we’ve been retired. Why are you asking?’ Ever the suspicious guy, Mabel could practically sense him narrowing his eyes through the pone.

‘Oh, I was just… curious,’ she replied, fumbling for a reason. ‘Me and some friends are doing a horror movie night and I was trying to find some ideas for horror stories to tell.’

‘Can’t you ask Dipper, he’s currently training in East Asia isn’t he?’ Stanford asked.

‘I don’t really wanna distract him, and besides it’s too late over there right now,’ she replied, internally patting herself on the back for her quick thinking. Good Mabel.

‘Well what d’ya wanna know?’ Stanley asked. ‘We went up against plenty of uggos over the years.’

Mabel relaxed. They bought it. ‘So, I was thinking of a story about a really powerful demon you know? Something that’s resistant to typical stuff like sage and crucifixes and can’t be trapped in rune circles.’

‘Oof, that’d be a tricky bugger,’ Stanley retorted. ‘Only ever saw one of those in all our years working.’

‘You did?’

‘Yes,’ Stanford replied. ‘It was a demon, a powerful one at that. They have their own hierarchy system in place, and this was from the first hierarchy which is the most powerful after Lucifer himself.’

Mabel swallowed. ‘How did you stop it?’

‘We trapped it,’ Stanley replied. ‘Couldn’t kill it so instead we lured the thing into a Church where thirteen Exorcists including ourselves all worked to bind it. It’s currently locked away under the Vatican City and protected 24/7.’

The brunette felt her heart drop. Oh God. And she’d been sat less than a foot away from this thing on multiple occasions for over two months!

‘Mabel, you there?’ Stanley asked when she said nothing.

‘I… Y-Yeah, I’m here,’ she replied, clutching the phone tighter. ‘Um, look, I think there’s something you should know. I think I’m being haunted by a demon who’s just as powerful as that one. Do you think you could get a bunch of exorcists over here to come grab him?’

Silence.

‘Hello? Grunkle Stan? Ford?’ When there was no answer she pulled the phone away from her ear only to realise her phone had switched off. Huh?

‘Now, now, nobody likes a snitch.’

Mabel flinched, head snapping across the room to see Bill smiling at her sinisterly from the shadows. She pulled the bed covers tightly against herself, eyes wide. How long had he been there? ‘You turned my phone off?’

‘Easy enough to fry the battery, don’t worry a new one shouldn’t be expensive.’

‘I don’t get it,’ she replied, eyebrows knitting together. ‘You’re the one who kept goading me to tell my brother about you.’

‘Just because I said you should doesn’t mean I’d let you,’ he replied, standing straight and approaching her. Oh no. She quickly scrambled backward, back hitting the headboard as he came to a stop at the foot of her bed.

‘I just wanted to see if you would ask for help,’ he went on, hands behind his back. ‘It took you quite the while before you did. You’re braver than you look.’

‘G-Get away,’ she stammered.

His eyes glowed. ‘Not so courageous when you realise what you’re up against, are we?’

The pair continued to stare at one another in the darkness for several tense seconds before he chuckled and turned away.

‘This can all end if you just give in.’

With that, he bled into the shadows.

‘Sweet dreams, Shooting Star.’

But instead, all she had were nightmares.

She continued her life uneasily and constantly on edge for several weeks, the anxiety wearing on her both mentally and physically. It was exhausting knowing there was an all-powerful demon watching your every move 24/7.

So, tiring in fact that it led her to a fatal mistake.

Mabel was driving to college, sighing as she took another sip of high-concentrated coffee to keep awake. Urgh, and she had exams in two days. What was she going to do?

She was watching the long stretch of road in front of her and the white lines zipping past absentmindedly as she drove past wine fields.

She didn’t even register nodding off.

All she knew was the next second she was hanging upside down in a flipped vehicle, everything hurt and there was the taste of blood permeating her mouth. She could smell gasoline and her breathing began to increase in quick succession as she realised her situation. Mabel went to undo the seat buckle only to yelp as plain flared from her arm. One look told her all she needed to know from the bone poking out – yep, definitely broken.

She managed to undo the buckle and fell to the ceiling of the vehicle, shards of glass digging into her hands and exposed skin.

Everything hurt so much.

Maybe she should just lay here until help arrived.

‘Well, well, well,’ a coy voice cut in.

Urgh, please no.

She turned her head to see Bill crouched over outside, peering in through the driver’s window with a smirk. ‘Got yourself in quite a state there,’ he said. ‘Luckily, I can help you out. All you need to do is, y’know…’ He trailed off meaningfully as he raised an eyebrow and a bundle of papers and pen were procured out of thin air.

She scowled. ‘As if.’

Bill’s eye narrowed. ‘I don’t think you get the severity of the situation here, Shooting Star. That smell you’re smelling is gasoline. And lots of it. I give you a few minutes until some spark ignites this thing into flames.’

Her eyes widened at that, stomach clenching. What? She tried to move but had to bite down on another yell, tears welling in her eyes at the pain. Oh God, everything hurt so much.

‘Don’t be stupid now, take the deal-‘

‘No!’ she yelled. ‘I’m not handing my soul over to some demon and especially not you!’

Bill scowled. ‘You idiot. If you die here, then neither of us win. I get a penalty on my records and you’re dead. What kind of ending is that?’

Mabel met his gaze, expression flaring. ‘Then get me out of here.’

‘Make the deal.’

‘No.’

Bill’s face darkened as they stared at one another, neither budging. The gas continued to leak from the ruptured fuel tank until the electrical system shorted, giving it the needed spark to ignite into flames.

‘God, you’re annoying.’

Bill sighed as he stood a hundred feet away from the inferno, holding the injured girl in his arms. He couldn’t believe he’d lost a game of chicken to this kid. She wasn’t even conscious to hear his insults.

He stared down at her with a scowl. Damn his pride. He’d never had a penalty before, and he wasn’t going to start now. She was lucky he was too prideful to allow her to die and lose points from his record.

Hearing the distant sounds of sirens, Bill dropped her by the roadside in clear sight. He pushed hair from her face, regarding her face. She was actually kinda cute when she wasn’t talking.

‘This isn’t over,’ he promised, before vanishing away.

‘I’m fine, Dipper,’ she chided, staring at her brother through the phone as they engaged in a video call.

‘You were in a car crash, Mabel,’ he snapped back, eyes wide. ‘That’s the opposite of fine. And I had to hear it from your friend Candy.’

‘Well, I was too unconscious to tell you myself.’

Dipper released a strangled noise.

‘Seriously though, I’m fine now. They’re discharging me later today actually.’

Her brother sighed, regarding her with concern. ‘I really want to come back and visit you.’

‘If you do that you’ll forfeit your training,’ she lectured. ‘Stay there and finish it off. You’re almost done right, just half a year left?

He hummed in response. ‘Yeah. Almost.’ There was a pause before he gave her a stern look. ‘Okay, but you better keep me updated. I don’t care if it’s three in the morning my time, call me. I worry about you by yourself.’

‘I’m fine,’ she insisted. And she was if you ignored the demon elephant in the room. They chatted for a few more minutes before she ended the call. She stared at the screen for a few moments before sighing. ‘Visiting hours are over y’know.’

‘For family and friends,’ Bill cut in, coming towards her from his corner. ‘I didn’t see any restriction against demons.’

She glared at him.

‘I see you’re still alive, congrats,’ he drawled.

‘Yeah, because of you,’ she replied, feeling awkward. ‘Thanks for that, I guess.’

He grimaced. ‘Don’t mention it. Seriously. I only did it for my own selfish gain.’

‘Well duh, I knew that much,’ she replied. ‘It’s not as if you like me. You’re only doing this because you act for that guy Lucfier.’

‘Lucifer isn’t a demon, it’s a title,’ Bill retorted.

Mabel tilted her head at that. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Every ten thousand years a demon is elected to be our new ruler,’ Bill explained. ‘He becomes the next Lucifer. The method of election is done by choosing whichever Prince has collected the highest number of souls from the First Hierarchy.’ His expression darkened as he clenched his fists. ‘For the last three hundred years I had been the clear favourite but because of you.’ He jabbed a finger in her direction. ‘My quota has gone to shot, and I’m in very dangerous territory of losing my position to some inferior, useless brute!’

Mabel blinked. ‘Sorry, not sorry.’ Wait, had he said he was a Prince? She was about to question that piece of important information when he suddenly yelled.

‘Argh, you are so infuriating!’ he spat, grabbing fistfuls of his hair. ‘I have never met a human as annoying as you!

Mabel folded her arms, lifting her nose into the air in pride. ‘I’ve been told that many times.’

Bill growled at her. ‘You owe me. The least you could do is make a deal with me, I’ll even give you fifty years before I try to claim your soul. That’s generous, right?’

‘Nope.’

He growled, looking like madman. ‘Look, it was okay when you rejected me in the beginning, every time granted me a few extra points to your soul on account of you being difficult, but now you’re just taking the piss!’

Mabel had to admit, seeing an esteemed and all-powerful demon throw a tantrum was very amusing.

She pressed the button to administer another hit of morphine and aaaaah yes, those two combined really hit the spot.

What an amazing feeling.

As much as she hated to admit it, she was grateful to the demon for saving her life. Even if it was very much just because of his own selfish interest that happened to align with her surviving.

Some of the fear she’d felt towards him dissipated a little bit. He’d promised he would soon stop acting so charming and show her his real demonic self but so far that hadn’t happened.

She was on bed rest for a few weeks following her discharge, and her friends Candy and Grenda visited her several times with gifts and groceries. It was going fine until one day the pair abruptly walked in whilst Bill was there, having a key for the apartment and therefore able to enter without warning.

All of them stared at each other in silence, taking in the other.

‘Oh, um, hi,’ Candy greeted, offering a nervous smile. ‘We are Mabel’s friends.’

‘Who’s the hunk?’ Grenda asked, getting right to the point.

Mabel floundered for a response. ‘Oh, him? He’s, uh… well… he’s not my boyfriend!’ she cried, wanting to make that part very clear.

‘Ouch,’ Bill remarked.

‘Then who is he?’ Grenda asked.

‘I’m her contractor,’ Bill replied, offering a cheeky grin that made the girls blush.

‘Contractor?’ Candy replied. ‘For what?’

Mabel shot him a sharp look. ‘He’s helping with me with… uh…’

‘Bathroom,’ Bill cut in, nodding. ‘Totally redoing it. Looks awful right now, you get what I mean right?’

The girls blinked but seemed to accept his statement, nodding in agreement to Mabel’s surprise. What was wrong with her bathroom? She decorated it herself!

‘Oh okay,’ Candy replied. ‘Well we won’t interrupt you, we’re just here to drop off some stuff and we’ll be on our way.’ She shot Mabel a wink which made her groan. Totally misreading the room here.

Mabel was glad to get them out of here, sighing in relief.

‘Contractor?’ she repeated, casting him a flat look. ‘Really?’

‘I mean if you’d grant me the honour,’ he replied, bending down on one knee with the pile of papers in hand.

Mabel flushed red. ‘Don’t do that! What if they walk back in and get the wrong idea!?’

She walked away from him. ‘And there’s nothing wrong with my bathroom! The giant frog gives it taste!’

‘Bad taste, yeah.’

Mabel hadn’t been on a date in three months.

She hadn’t kissed a guy in five.

She was in serious need of some romance but that proved impossible with a certain blondie. She found that out the first time she tried to bring a guy back to her apartment only to be greeted with Bill laying in her bed with no shirt on. She hoped to God he had been wearing pants but she hadn’t stuck around to find out, and her date hadn’t either.

The poor guy had yelled something about “not being into that sort of stuff” as he fled for the hills.

Bill was acting as a very unwelcome third wheel.

That’s why tonight she’d find some guy and go to his place instead. Perfect. Fluffing up her hair, she examined her get up in the mirror with an appreciate nod. Totally cute as hell. And her arm was now healed enough to not have a cast or sling, so that was great.

She was turning to leave when she walked into a brick wall. Oop. Taking a step back, she raised her head to blink at the demon stood waiting. ‘What do you want?’

His eyes roamed up and down her body before landing on her face. ‘Going somewhere fancy, are we?’

She pursed her lips. ‘We’re having a girls night out.’ She pointed a finger at his chest. ‘No boys allowed.’

He opened his mouth.

‘No demons either.’

He closed it. Bill narrowed his eyes. ‘Well, I hope to see you back tonight. Wouldn’t want to have to follow after you to some unsavoury guy’s room.’

She frowned. ‘Then don’t.’

‘Oh, but I will.’

Mabel stomped her foot. ‘Why!? All I want is one night of romance, you can’t even let me have that!?’

‘A one-night stand is not the setting for romance,’ he drawled back.

‘Well, it’s the best I can get with you around,’ Mabel snapped back. ‘So, I’ll have to settle.’ She went to step around him only to have a hand wrap around her arm and tug her back. When she looked back she found herself staring eye to eye with the demon, their faces scant inches apart as his other arm looped around her waist, hand pressing gently against the small of her back so their waists were close. She blinked rapidly, lips parting to speak but her voice died as his fingers traced down her arm, her thoughts a muddled mess at his actions. Then, as he raised his arm to run his fingers through her hair, she felt herself go slack in his arms. It felt so nice and tantalising. Her eyelids began to droop as he leaned his head closer, lips brushing against her neck before he moved to breathe into her ear.

‘….This is the romance you should strive for,’ he whispered.

And just like that he moved away, his hands of support vanishing so swiftly she tripped over herself to regain her balance. Her face flamed red as she watched him leave her room with a chuckle, and she glared after him. ‘G-Get out!’ she yelled, even though he’d already exited the room. She spun back around towards the mirror, staring at her flushed complexion with humiliation. So what, one intense look and lingering touch and she was like a pile of goo in his arms? Urgh, stupid hormones.

She grabbed her bag with a scowl, still intent on going out. She was cute, it’d be easy to find some guy who wanted to touch her and kiss her and….

….

That wasn’t what she wanted though. She didn’t want to be groped at, she wanted to be held and treasured. She wanted a connection.

She wanted to be loved.

‘Urgh.’ Mabel threw her bag on the bed before joining it face-first as she yelled into her covers and kicked her legs. Curse that demon!

Meanwhile, Bill peeked through the slit in the door to regard her throwing a tantrum of her own following his teasing. He smirked. She really was cute.

‘Hey, how’s it going?’ Kryptos asked when they bumped into one another one evening during one of his returns to Hell.

Bill blinked. ‘Oh hey.’

‘So I hear you still haven’t bagged that contract,’ Kryptos asked with a giggle. ‘Here I thought nothing could elude the One-Eyed Demon! What’s keeping the ol’ Bill Cipher, Prince of Seraphium, hm?’

Bill glowered at him, face darkening.

‘Hey, hey, I’m just kidding!’ Kryptos asked, laughing again albeit nervously. ‘It’s just… Everyone is talking about it, y’know? Daemonicus is very close to overtaking you on the leader board so you better watch out. Especially when we’re this close to the deadline!’

‘Ya think I don’t know that?’ he snapped.

‘Well then what’s the problem?’ Kryptos probed. ‘Every human has something they want with every fibre of their being, yours included. Cm’on, if you really try I’m sure you can figure it out – I’m rooting for you to win, I even have bets on it!’

Ah, so that was the reason why. Bill rolled his eyes.

‘It’s not like you’re intentionally dragging your feet for some reason, right?’

Bill scoffed. ‘As if.’

She was just another human being like any other.

And he would take her soul like the countless others before her.

Guaranteed.

‘Here.’

Mabel blinked as he offered her a gift box out of the blue over the kitchen island whilst she was baking. ‘What is this?’

‘Open it and find out.’

She frowned suspiciously but did as he said. Upon opening it, she stared in confusion. ‘These are photographs,’ she said. ‘Of my friends and family. She grabbed the one with Dipper on it, it was a shot of him tripping over some rock into a stream. Hah.

‘Yup.’ Bill grinned, resting against the island. ‘And if you don’t make a deal with me I’m gonna kill every one of them.’

Her heart stopped. Mabel raised her head, blinking at him without emotion. ‘…Huh?’ Her throat felt dry. ‘You… You can’t do that.’

‘I’m a demon, I can do whatever I want.’ He shrugged. ‘I tried to be nice but playtime’s over and this is the lot you’re being dealt with now.’

She tried to swallow past the lump in her throat as she regarded the photos in the box. Dipper, Candy, Grenda, Gideon, both her Grunkles. The amount of people in here would constitute a slaughter.

Tears burned her eyes as she regarded the pictures. He had warned her he’d stop playing around sooner or later, it was her fault for dropping her guard.

‘Okay,’ she said eventually, voice hoarse as she tried to blink away the tears. ‘You win.’

But when she raised her head once again to look at him, he looked sour-faced. She sniffed. ‘What?’

Bill looked as if he’d eaten a lemon, jaw clenching as he glanced aside. Then, he just shrugged. ‘Eh, never mind.’

She stared blankly. ‘What?’

He turned around and began walking away as he waved a hand. ‘Consider it a prank. It’s no fun to take souls with blackmail, I prefer the old-fashioned way where you come to me instead!’

Her face scrunched up as she tried to figure out what had just happened. Her confusion was cut short however when the smell of burning invaded her nostrils.

‘Ah, the brownies!!’

In the end she put his “prank” down as him being an insufferable demon.

Meanwhile, Bill bashed his head against the bathroom tiles whilst trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with him.

One evening she was driving back from a party at her older friend’s house, Wendy, who she knew from when she was younger. The girl lived an hour away, so it was a bit of a drive back but apparently Bill decided to sit in with her half way through it. Unfortunately, his sudden appearance caused her to almost have a heart attack and almost earned her a second car crash in the space of four months.

‘I’m not gonna save you from a car wreck a second time,’ he warned when she finally regained her steering. ‘Ain’t happening.’

Mabel sighed out deeply, calming her beating heart. ‘Noted.’

He hummed, leaning back in his seat as they drove through the city. The silence was quite content but even so Mabel decided to cut into it after several minutes.

‘So, when exactly does the honey pot run out?’

‘Hm?’

‘A few months ago you warned me after Gideon,’ she replied. ‘I’m still waiting for you to go all evil on me. You almost had me with the photo prank – which wasn’t funny at all by the way, that’s a real asshole move.’

Bill scoffed, glancing out his window. ‘As if I’d tell you, that would ruin the surprise.’

She shouldn’t have expected to get anything out of him to begin with. She rolled her eyes and continued driving in silence, with only the radio for background noise. Fifteen minutes must have passed when he spoke this time instead.

‘Is there nothing you want?’

‘Hm?’

He glanced at her seriously. ‘Every human has something they would sell their soul for. Even you.’

Mabel gripped onto the steering wheel more tightly.

‘So you do,’ he noted coyly, leaning back in his chair. ‘Cm’on, what is it? I saved your life, you owe me. You’ve obviously resisted it so far so what’s the harm in telling me now?’

Probably a lot, he was a demon after all.

But Mabel told him anyway.

‘My brother,’ she replied, and she saw the surprise on his face when she admitted it. ‘If anything happened to him, I’d…. I don’t know what I’d do.’ She swallowed. ‘I’d do anything for him.’ Even break her promise and sell her soul to save him.

Bill frowned at that. ‘Hm. So all I’d have to do is threaten him and you’d hand the soul over like a piece of pie.’

‘Yeah,’ she replied. As they came to a stop light, she turned to regard him. ‘But you said you don’t do stuff that way.’

Bill folded his arms. ‘I guess I did say that, huh.’ He shot her a look, a sly smile in place. ‘Which is why you’re okay with telling me this. Well played.’

Indeed, she was saying all this on the hope that he would stay true to his word when he advised her he wouldn’t harm her family and friends to get at her.

How stupid to be putting her faith in a demon.

‘So, what now?’ she asked as she put the car into forward again.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Well, I’m not going to give you my soul unless Dipper was in danger. And you said you wouldn’t intentionally hurt him to force my hand so unless my bro gets in some coincidental accident nothing’s gonna happen.’

‘Your brother’s a god damn Exorcist,’ Bill replied. ‘He’ll be in danger plenty of times.’

‘And you’re fine waiting around for that?’

The demon went silent.

Eventually, he spoke in a soft whisper.

‘By that time you’ll all be done for already.’

‘What?’ Mabel frowned at his response. When he didn’t say anything and she was sure nothing was coming her way on the road, she glanced aside. ‘Bill?’

But he was gone.

Mabel regarded his empty seat for a moment before returning her attention to the road, clenching the steering wheel even tighter still.

What did he mean by that?

A few days later found Bill Cipher crouched over Mabel Pines’ sleeping form upon her bed, staring down at her with eyes glowing in the darkness like a feline.

The girl therefore couldn’t be really blamed when she awoke to that sight and screamed bloody murder whilst punching him in the face.

But even so, it still hurt!

‘Ow, motherfu-‘ He rubbed his jaw with a wince as Mabel threw her bedside light on, squinting at the abrupt brightness.

‘Bill?’ she asked in disbelief which was soon eclipsed by anger. ‘What the hell are you playing at? You scared the crap out of me!! Asshole!’

He scowled at her. ‘You weren’t meant to wake up.’

She frowned. ‘That’s creepier. Why are peeping on me in my sleep?’ Her eyes widened, face paling. ‘Do you do this every night?’

‘No!’ he snapped, face flushed with indignation. He didn’t know what it was about this brat that got him so worked up so easily. That’s what he was trying to find out! Admittedly, staring down at her intensely as she slept might not have been the best solution, but he was willing to try anything to answer the several questions running through his mind day and night.

Why hadn’t he “gone all evil” on her, as she so eloquently put it?

Why had he renegaded on his “blackmail” and called it a simple prank?

Why did he continue to avoid threatening her brother, if it meant she’d hand over her soul easily?

He knew there was an obvious answer in plain view but he refused to acknowledge it. To do so would threaten everything he had been working towards these past ten thousand years and make him a laughingstock of all demon kind.

The last demon who took kindly to a human ended up being betrayed and locked under the Vatican to this day. The poor sod.

He refused to end up the same way.

‘Bill?’

She poked his cheek, breaking him out of his stupor as he realised she had been calling him and indeed had scooted to the end of her bed to touch him. He blinked down at her, regarding her perched there in pyjamas covered in narwhale print.

Urgh, why did she continue to look cute?

‘You’re ugly,’ he said instead.

Mabel’s mouth dropped agape, anger igniting within her eyes at his insult. Dammit, now she looked even cuter, he’d made an error.

‘Get the hell out of my bedroom, you creep!’ she yelled.

One day a month later she called him with desperation. The demon appeared and she flung herself at him with a frantic gaze as she gripped at his shirt tightly. ‘You have to do something!’

Bill blinked, taking in her frazzled state with confusion. ‘Do what?’

‘I can’t get hold of Dipper!’ she cried. ‘He always responds to my messages, and I haven’t heard from him in two days. I spoke to my Grunkle Ford and he found out from the organisation that they went on a retreat earlier this week and nobody’s heard from them since! They were meant to be fighting some creatures and what if something’s happened to him?’

Bill had never seen her so worked up, not even when she was lying injured in a crashed vehicle. ‘What do you expect me to do?’

‘Go find him!’ she said desperately, eyes wide and imploring. ‘I’ll make a deal with you, so go find him and if he’s in trouble, save him!’

Bill blinked. She was offering her soul on the chance her brother was in trouble – not even guaranteed.

She really did love him, huh? Seriously disgusting.

(A small, tiny part of him tried to say he was jealous but he snuffed it out quickly).

‘Jeez, relax would ya,’ he chided, tugging her hands away from him. ‘I’m sure your brother is fine.’

‘But he’s-!’

‘If it’ll get you to shut up then I’ll find out for ya.’

Mabel blinked. ‘You will?’ Her face split into a wide grin that did weird things to his stomach and he nodded, quickly pulling away. He needed to get some distance and fast.

‘Sure, be right back.’

‘Huh? But what about-‘

He left before she could finish her sentence. Urgh. It was easy enough to travel to East Asia in an instance and only took a few hours to locate her twin brother in the wilderness. Looks like he and his team had gone off the path and become lost, but they were otherwise in good health. If they kept going in the same direction at the pace they were right now, they should find the path again in half a days’ time.

He hung out to make sure that was the case before returning to Mabel Pines home. It was early hours when he arrived, but she was still wide awake given how she leapt out of bed at his arrival. He almost expected her to punch him again but instead she settled for a sharp look instead, looking exhausted and weary. ‘You said you’d be right back! It’s been ten hours!’

‘I was making sure they didn’t get lost again, you’re freaking welcome,’ he muttered.

She perked up at that. ‘So, they’re okay?’

‘I said they would be, didn’t I?’ he retorted. ‘Your idiot brother will probably call you in the morning.’

Mabel then did something that surprised them both. She hugged him.

Throwing her arms around his form, she squeezed the demon tightly. ‘Thank you,’ she whispered, eyes squeezed shut as she fought back tears of relief.

Bill stood unsurely, arms held aloft at his side as he stared down at the top of her head. He wasn’t sure what to do here. Just as his arms twitched and he began to move them around her frame she suddenly lurched out of his grasp, cheeks dusted pink as she avoided his gaze. ‘Haha…. Sorry about that. I’m just happy about Dipper, that’s all.’

The warmth in his chest died back down and he offered a cool smile. ‘Of course.’ Why else would she ever hug him?

‘Thank you though, I mean it.’ She glanced up at him from beneath wet eyelashes. ‘I’m surprised you didn’t make a deal with me though before going out there. Wouldn’t that have been the perfect time?’

He frowned. Yes, it would have.

‘I’ll choose the perfect time,’ he replied, before leaving.

He really was in dire trouble here, wasn’t he?

It had now been eight months since Mabel’s life had been intruded upon by the demon Bill Cipher and whilst it had been rocky in the beginning, she liked to think they had some sort of dysfunctional camaraderie now. It may all just be a very long-con leading up to him grabbing her soul but if so, it was a nice one given what he did for her in regard to Dipper.

Oddly enough though he seemed to appear less and less frequently following the night he confirmed Dipper was safe.

It had been a week since she last saw the demon, and she found herself dicing vegetables at the kitchen counter whilst humming to music on the radio. She wondered what he was up to these days since he seemed too busy to annoy her.

Mabel glanced across her empty apartment thoughtfully before speaking aloud. ‘Bill?’

‘Yes?’

She jumped, dropping the knife in surprise as she spun around to see the blond standing beside the table. She smiled. ‘So, you were here.’

‘I’m always around,’ he replied. ‘Besides, you called me and-‘ He stopped, frowning. ‘Are you bleeding?’

Mabel tilted her head curiously before following his gaze down to her fingers. Oh shoot, she must have cut herself on the knife. She was about to move towards the sink when a hand came into view and pulled her there instead. Mabel could only stare as Bill tutted whilst turning the cold tap on. ‘Really, it’s a surprise how you hadn’t already killed yourself before I came into the picture.’

Mabel watched as he fetched first aid box, procuring a band aid that he proceeded to apply to her finger. He cast her a glance and frowned. ‘Why are you smiling at me like that?’

She blinked. Was she smiling? Huh. ‘No reason,’ she replied. ‘I guess I just find it kinda funny.’

He raised an eyebrow.

‘I mean, you’re a demon and you’re here applying band aids to my hand,’ she went on. ‘I didn’t even ask you to.’

The blond’s expression soured, and he dropped her hand abruptly like he’d been burnt. ‘Well sorry for tending to your injuries,’ he replied in a snarky manner.

Her smile dropped, sensing she’d somehow tripped a nerve though she wasn’t sure why. ‘I’m not saying it’s a bad a thing! It was nice so thank you.’

Bill continued to scowl at her.

‘Uh… I don’t suppose you want to stay for dinner?’ she asked. ‘I’m making lasagne and watching a movie.’ Her friends all had plans tonight so it was just a night in alone otherwise.

‘I’m an all-powerful demon who could end you with a flick of my wrist,’ Bill retorted, voice flat.

‘So that’s a no, then?’

His eyes narrowed.

An hour later the pair sat on her sofa with bowls of food as they watched some quiz show where the contestants got dunked into slime if they got an answer wrong. They both laughed every time a person got slimed, which was often.

It was the best night she’d had in a while.

She ended up hanging out with the demon more and more in a casual setting. First, they went to the movie theatre. Then, she managed to persuade him to come along shopping whilst she tried on outfits. Next, they went to the aquarium and watched the fish.

Mabel was having a blast, and as the days went by it was getting closer and closer to Dipper being done with his training and coming back home.

It was all going so well until one night she invited Bill to the beach.

‘A bunch of us are going to the beach this weekend,’ she gushed excitedly. ‘And it’s meant to be a really nice day so what d’ya say, you in?’

Bill regarded her from opposite the kitchen table, the pair currently in the midst of eating dinner. He regarded her silently for a moment before replying.

‘No.’

Oh. Her enthusiasm deflated at that, the grin on her face dampening. ‘Why not? Are you not into the beach? You don’t have to go into the water if you don’t want, you can stay on the beach.’

‘I’m done with this little setup you’ve conned me into,’ Bill said, voice short and expression flat.

‘What does that mean?’

‘You’re looking for romance and you’ve pulled me into playing the part of your boyfriend on dates so you can play pretend.’

‘T-That’s not true,’ she retorted, caught off guard.

‘Isn’t it?’ he gave her a look. ‘I must say, even though I’m the demon here you’re being quite a selfish and unfair person.’

Mabel felt her face flush red. ‘You’re the one who banned me from dating anyone! Or did you forget? You said you’d interfere with anyone I tried to have a shot with!’

‘Then consider this my revocation of that promise,’ Bill supplied, offering her a false smile. ‘You’re free to go kiss and romance whoever you wish. Now you have nothing holding you back.’ He stood up from the table and walked past her. ‘Go get your happily ever after whilst you can.’

She turned her head at his ominous words but he’d already left. Hands clenching in her lap, she bit down on her lip.

Okay fine, he didn’t want to hang out? That was no problem, she was only doing that because she thought they were somewhat friends. He was wrong, she wasn’t treating him like her boyfriend. Who would want a demon for a date anyways?

Mabel could find a decent human guy.

And she would.

Five dates later and Mabel had to wonder if the dating pool had always been this slim. The first few guys had been total write-offs, using innuendos and pervy picky up lines. The next few weren’t as bad, but Mabel just wasn’t feeling that “zing” she was after.

Her current date sat across from her in the restaurant was promising. He was a doctor in paediatrics who was clean-shaven, polite, and insisted on paying for her order. He had complimented her appearance straight away and had the right amount of listening to speaking ratio.

On paper he was a dynamite prospect.

…So then why did she feel there was still something missing?

Her date smiled at her as he finished his story off. ‘…and that’s how I got into medicine. But enough about me, I’d love to hear more about you. Is it too early to ask for a second date so we can continue our conversation?’

Mabel offered a weak smile back.

‘About that….’

She returned to her apartment and collapsed on the sofa, groaning. What was wrong with her? Since when had her expectations been so high that they ruled out hunky doctor gentleman? She was the same girl who’d dated a guy with no job who lived in his mother’s basement and claimed his band “was about to have a breakthrough” for six months!

‘What’s wrong with me?’ she whined.

After several minutes she pushed herself to sit up, sighing as her eyes wandered across her apartment. Had it always been this big and empty? Her lips moved to form his name before she caught herself, chastising herself internally. It wasn’t fair of her to call on him just because she was lonely. Heck, the demon himself had called her out on it!

Grabbing a pillow to hug, she pouted and stared across at her forlorn reflection in the television screen.

She missed him.

Urgh.

How pathetic was she, that she was actually missing the demon who tormented her?

….Except he didn’t. Not anymore at least. In fact, she couldn’t recall the last time heharassed her seriously.

‘Sup.’

Speak of the Devil.

Her heart felt elated at the sound of his voice, and Mabel turned her head to find him stepping out of the kitchen with a half-eaten apple in his hand. He blinked when he saw her. ‘What’s with that look?’

Oh. Right. She probably looked like her puppy had been kicked following her bad date-

Except when she caught her gaze in the television screen, she was smiling ear to ear.

Because of him.

She raised her hands, covering her mouth as she flushed pink. Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no.

Mabel squeezed her eyes shut as she internally wailed.

She liked the demon.

God dammit.

Bill continued to stare at her as she acted ridiculously, taking another bite of his apple.

Humans were weird.

Mabel was never known for keeping quiet about her love interests. No, she always made a move, bold as ever, and often got turned down.

That’s probably how this would turn out too.

It was a few weeks later that Mabel called on the demon. Bill appeared, as always, in a timely fashion.

‘Yo.’

Mabel smiled at him. ‘Hey.’

He took a second glance, eyes wandering over her frame and Mabel tried not to flush at his scrutiny. She’d dolled herself up a bit before calling him and hoped he’d comment but instead he simply made a small hum in the back of his throat before staring at her expectantly.

Okay, well never mind.

Huffing, she breathed in deeply and took a step towards him, determined. ‘I thought of something else that I’d hand my soul over for.’

That got his attention, his eyes brightening as he gave her his full attention. ‘You have?’

She nodded. ‘Yup. I’d be willing to hand it over for a date.’

His expression fell and he looked almost… disappointed? ‘Really?’ he asked flatly, looking aside and uninterested. ‘Is that it?’

Refusing to be deterred by his response she nodded. ‘Uh huh. Do you wanna know who with?’

‘Not really but go on.’

She took another step forward, clasping her hands behind as she took in another breath.

‘You.’

The demon blinked, looking back at her. He stared. She stared back.

‘What?’

‘I said…. you,’ she repeated, voice quieter this time. Her lips were quirking into a nervous smile and her hands felt super sweaty. ‘I’d wanna go on a date – a real date – with you.’

Bill continued to stare and the more he went without speaking, the more her nerves went into overdrive.

After a full minute, she broke. ‘Uh, this is where it’s your turn to speak,’ she replied. ‘A simple yes or no will suffice. Hopefully yes, heh.’

He cleared his throat. ‘You’re asking me out?’

She nodded.

‘You like me?’

She nodded again.

Bill raised a hand, covering his mouth and jaw as he looked ahead, eyes looking in all directions in frantic thought.

Mabel frowned, unclasping her hands as she reached out towards him. ‘Hey-‘

Bill suddenly snapped his head down, meeting her gaze as he grabbed both her wrists. She blinked, noting that all this time beneath his hand he’d been hiding a smile.

She’d never seen him smile so genuinely before.

‘Did anyone ever tell you that you have bad taste in men?’ he asked, voice light as he regarded her with warm eyes.

She laughed nervously at that. ‘Sometimes…’ She glanced at his hands around her wrists before looking back at him. ‘Soooo… does this mean you’re saying yes?

He leaned closer, releasing her wrists in favour of sliding his fingers between her own as he took both her hands in his.

‘Very much yes,’ he said in an alluring tone, face nearing her own. Ah, there was that zing she was after. She felt a tingling sensation coursing through her entire body and she sighed blissfully as his lips finally met hers. Oh yes. Mouth slanting across his own, she wasn’t sure how but when they pulled apart, his hands had found their way into her hair and her fingers had slid beneath his shirt. Oops.

Mabel regarded him with flushed cheeks, lips stretching into a grin. ‘Well, hi there.’

He smirked back at her.

She really did have bad taste in guys, huh?

‘So, what happens now?’ she asked a few weeks later as they laid on her sofa tangled together, her head resting on his chest. Apparently demons also had beating hearts as she could hear it beneath like a steady drum.

‘Hm?’ he replied, running a hand through her hair.

‘Well, you can’t take my soul now, right?’ she asked. ‘Or I mean, I hope not when we’re sort of dating.’

Bill sighed. ‘I haven’t been planning on taking your soul for a while now.’

She lifted her head at that. ‘Oh? How long’s that then?’ How long had he liked her for?

He shot her a disgruntled look. ‘Not important.’ He looked aside. ‘I won’t take your soul but that also means I can’t move on to take anybody else’s. We demons can never have more than one unfinished contract going at a time, it’s a rule.’

‘You said there was some sort of scoreboard….’ She mumbled, frowning. ‘And you were in the lead?’

He nodded, staring up ahead at the ceiling. ‘I was. I’m not anymore. Daemonicus has taken over the lead spot.’

‘Sorry.’

He scoffed. ‘Like I care. If he wants to be the next Lucifer he can be, he’ll be horrible at it.’

‘But don’t you want to be Lucifer?’

Bill clenched his jaw. ‘I do.’ His golden gaze wandered across to her. ‘But I want you more.’

Mabel melted at that because why wouldn’t she? ‘That’s so romantic,’ she breathed, leaning down to kiss him.

Bill hummed, lips moving across her jawline and throat. ‘Tell me, do you want us to go away somewhere it’s just the two of us?’

She relaxed under his gentle touch. ‘Mhmm, that sounds nice.’ She released a small noise of surprise when he suddenly switched their positions, straddling her form on the sofa. Not that she was complaining. She grinned up at him as she tugged his tie playfully. ‘It can be like a couple’s vacation.’

He smiled from beneath tousled locks of hair as he leaned down to kiss her throat again. ‘Just you and me,’ he whispered, and she sighed happily.

‘Forever.’

She froze.

‘What?’

Bill sighed, pulling back to regard her with a resigned expression.

‘What do you mean by that?’ she asked, searching his face. ‘Bill?’

He paused before speaking. ‘Every time a new Lucifer is coronated, they choose the way demon kind is ruled for the next ten thousand years. The current contender Daemonicus has made it very clear that his platforms main priority is the enslaving of humanity for the betterment of demons. There are many unhappy with our current leader due to his stance on us remaining in the shadows and granting humankind the freedom to do as they wish.’

Mabel’s blood went cold.

‘The next Lucifer will be crowed tomorrow,’ Bill declared, expression sombre. ‘And with it, humanity will be thrown into chaos and destruction.’ He reached out, cradling her chin with his hand. ‘That’s why I need to get you somewhere safe. Somewhere they won’t find you.’

Mabel felt tears prickling at the corners of her eyes. ‘But what about everyone else? What about my family? My friends? My brother?’

Bill averted his gaze. ‘I can’t save them. I’m already taking on enough of a risk just by hiding you.’

Mabel pushed herself to sit up, causing him to fall back on the sofa. Mabel blinked rapidly, soaking in all this information. ‘So, you’re saying unless you take my soul, the whole of humanity will be enslaved and tortured for the next ten thousand years?’

‘Pretty much,’ he replied.

That was a heavy pill to swallow. She thought to her family and friends, chewing her lower lip frantically before she raised her head to meet his gaze. He already seemed to know what she was going to say. ‘Then I’ll do it, I’ll make a deal with you.’

‘No.’

She blinked. ‘Huh?’

‘I’m not taking your soul,’ he retorted. ‘I refuse.’

‘But you have to!’

‘Actually, I don’t,’ he replied, gaze steely.

Mabel scowled at him. ‘Fine. But I’m not going away with you. I refuse to hide whilst those I love are being tortured. I’d rather die fighting by their side than hiding like a coward.’

Bill’s expression darkened. ‘You can’t do that.’

‘Actually, I can,’ she snapped back, mocking his earlier words. The pair both glared at one another stubbornly, neither willing to back down.

Eventually, Bill sighed. ‘Even if I was to take your soul, it’s no use anymore. I’d still lose.’

Her heart sank. ‘How come?’

Bill snapped his fingers and a magical visual of a scoreboard appeared. ‘Daemonicus has outdone himself these past few months I’ve been playing around with you. Look at the little tyke, he’s gone way past me.’ Mabel regarded the name “Daemonicus” above “Bill Cipher”. Next to them were runes which she assumed were the equivalent of numbers for points, but she couldn’t translate what they said.

‘Is there no way?’ she asked, desperate. ‘I mean, you once said every time I turned you down my soul gained more value right? I can just reject you a thousand times!’

Bill chuckled. ‘Even if that would work we don’t have time for that, the deadline is in a couple of hours.’ His expression grew weary. ‘I wanted to keep it from you until the last minute so you wouldn’t be sad longer than necessary.’

Her heart sank. ‘So that’s it? There’s no other way to get you more points for my soul?’

Bill paused. ‘…No.’

Her eyes narrowed at that, leaning forward. ‘You hesitated.’ When he averted his gaze from her, she leaned even closer, pressing her body against his whilst boring holes into his face. ‘Bill. Tell me dammit.’ She raised her hands threateningly. ‘Or else I’ll tickle you.’

‘Okay, fine.’

She grinned. Triumph. That grin dampened however when he turned to regard her, face sombre.

‘In every contract we grant a human there is a certain clause that is very important,’ he explained. ‘It sets out how many years a human is granted before we claim their soul. The standard amount is ten years. For those that are more desperate, we can negotiate it down to as little as a few years. For others that are more reluctant, we add on a few more decades to entice the offer. Depending on how many years they get alters how many points we get.’

Mabel soaked in this information. ‘So, you’re saying if I made a deal with you where I only got a few years, you’d get more points?’

‘That’s how it works.’

‘Enough to beat Daemonicus?’

‘Nah.’

Her shoulders slumped. ‘What?’ Just how far ahead was this other guy?

Bill clasped his hands together, staring down at them in his lap. ‘Right now, to come out top you’d need to alter the clause in your contract to even less time.’

She swallowed thickly. ‘So, what are we talking, like a year?’

Silence.

‘A month?’

More silence. Her heart hammered wildly.

‘A w-week?’

Bill finally met her eyes. ‘I’d need to claim your soul immediately.’

Oh.

‘Wow,’ she whispered. ‘So no time to even watch an episode of my latest sitcom, huh?’ she joked, trying to deflect the growing sense of devastation. She wouldn’t even have time to say goodbye to her family.

‘See, that’s why I didn’t want to say it,’ Bill groaned, running a hand through his hair.

‘W-Why? I’ll still do it,’ she stammered, even as tears welled in her eyes. If it meant her soul vs all of humanity then the answer was obvious right? This way she could protect all her loved ones.

‘Of course you will,’ he snapped, glaring. ‘You’re too kind for your own good. Which is exactly why I didn’t want to say it. Don’t you get it? You mean more to me than anything else right now!’

Mabel took his hands in her own, staring down at their joined. ‘You have to take my soul,’ she whispered. ‘Because if you don’t, I’ll hate you forever.’ She glanced up at him through her bangs, tears blurring her vision. She couldn’t live with herself if her loved ones were tortured when she could have stopped it. And she wouldn’t forgive him either.

Bill’s expression cracked and she saw the desperation in his gaze as he fought back tears. ‘Please don’t make me do this,’ he begged, clutching her hands tighter. ‘Let’s go back to how it was a short while ago when we were fooling around.’

Mabel shook her head, sniffling. ‘We can’t. It’s time to make a deal.’ She lowered her head so she wouldn’t have to see the look of heartbreak she knew he wore on his face, because she did too.

Several minutes passed before he spoke, voice eerily emotionless. Almost as if he’d cast aside his emotions to make it through what came next. ‘….Okay, fine. Mabel Pines, state your wish.’ There was a soft thud as the large pile of contract papers landed on the coffee table beside them. She glanced aside at them, a tear falling down her cheek as she regarded the pen and place for signature.

Sorry Dipper, but she was breaking her promise.

‘…2, 1, 0!’

Cheers erupted throughout the crowd as the counter hit zero, the scoreboard showing none other than Bill Cipher of the First Hierarchy as the winner. Nobody had expected him to get back on top at the last second but somehow against all odds he’d managed it.

‘Bill Cipher, congratulations,’ the feminine pink demon said, speaking into a mic on stage. ‘You are our new Lucifer for the next ten thousand years. It was certainly a ride this past year! News reports show his last contract was a mighty stubborn one! Though when you reveal her family line has several esteemed Exorcists, once can’t be too surprised. Indeed, the human resisted until the last very second with our new ruler before finally giving in. And in a rare show, she accepted a contract with zero time between signature and soul claim which was the action required to give him just enough bonus points to secure the leadership! I think we can all agree our new ruler is a one of a kind and is sure to bring in a new age benefiting demonkind! Let’s all give him a round of applause!!’

Bill sat atop his throne with a crown on his head, residing within his new palace benefiting a King of Hell. He listened as the news demon on television continued to praise his actions to the cheering crowds outside.

But none of it mattered.

He’d had to claim the soul of the girl he loved. Her lifeless body was still in her apartment laying on the sofa, though by now her friends must have found her after the anonymous message he left them. He wondered how her brother would react to the news.

‘In return for my soul, I want you to treat humanity kindly for the next thousand years.’

She was selfless even in the end.

Luckily, her contracted wish had only covered humanity.

She never specified how he had to treat the demon kind who had forced his hand in killing her to begin with.

His expression darkened as her regarded the scores of demons waiting outside his palace.

He had ten thousand years to kill millions of demons.

Good thing the honey pot had finally run dry.

AN: I want to remind you – you asked for the angst inclusion! Mabel’s death is contingent on that request!! Don’t shoot the writer!!

#mabill #oneshot #kirikocamel #bill x mabel

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