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galaxy-brain-rasslin · 9 months ago

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Thoughts on AEW: Revolution (2024)

There will be spoilers. There will also be a cut, as a courtesy.

Zero Hour:

The Bang Bang Scissor Gang (Max Caster, Anthony Bowens, Billy Gunn, Austin Gunn, Colten Gunn, Jay White) vs Jeff Jarrett, Stanam Singh, Jay Lethal, Willie Mack, and Private Part

This consistent thing of Max flubbing on the rap is interesting. My current assumption is that they're potentially having Max break away from the group. Which is an interesting choice, because Bowens is significantly more popular.

The match itself was totally fine. It was a Jarrett match. I didn't go into it expecting it to be some sort of masterpiece of technical wrestling. I expected a fun, goofy little thing with a bunch of silly shit happening that also happened to have some decent-to-good wrestling. And that's exactly what this was. No complaints.

I have no idea if White's post-match promo was intended to be interpreted as a smarmy, insincere thing filled with deliberately cheap pops for the audience, but that's how I heard it. It somehow made it so much better.

Willow Nightingale & Kris Statlander vs Julia Hart & Skye Blue

Julia Hart's character going from a cheerleader to "What if The Undertaker was a spooky girl instead?" is such an amazing transformation. I can't get over how well she's committed to the presentation of the gimmick, and how good this is. Skye going from blue-themed girl from Chicago to a Dark Kingdom cosplayer has also been an interesting development. I like how these two also seem to be enjoying the changeup.

Stokely Hathaway is hilarious. I love him on commentary. His inclusion of the dynamic with Willow and Kris is just fantastic.

If I've said it once, I've said it 100 times-- I love Willow. She's one of my favorite women on the roster. The combination of the happy/bubbly personality that also contains someone who, if pressed, will rip you in half? Wonderful stuff. And Statlander is also consistently great. Watching these two throw Skye around was fantastic.

I was a little surprised to see Willow and Kris win without any major fuckery. Julia's moonsault looked significantly better compared the one with her match against Abadon.

It was a fun little match.

Revolution

Christian Cage vs Daniel Garcia, AEW TNT Championship

Christian Cage continues to be one of the best heels in professional wrestling today. A gimmick composed entirely of "lmao L + Ratio + Dead Dad" and "I will be your father"-- all while he wrestles in a goddamn sleeveless turtleneck? Everything about that is just somebody whose face you want to see punched.

Really happy to see Garcia get the match. I mentioned before that I had wanted DG to win. That didn't happen, but I thought everything about the match was great. Menard combing out there to beat the hell out of Luchasaurus/Killswitch in defense of Danny was great.

I thought Garcia looked good in this, and I don't think him losing to Christian (especially with all the interference) will cause any significant issues.

Ultimately, I enjoyed the match. I thought it was a good opener and kept me pretty invested the whole time. Although I'm wondering who is going to be the one to actually take the title off Christian.

Eddie Kingston vs Bryan Danielson, Continental Crown Championship (AEW Continental, ROH World, NJPW Strong Openweight Championships)

Bryan Danielson is without question one of the greatest technical pro wrestlers of all time. Also, he and Eddie both are fantastic in-ring storytellers.

Bryan Danielson, in his current iteration, is also a condescending piece of shit, and he's great at doing that, too.

Like Willow, I love Eddie. Eddie is up there with Hiroshi Tanahashi in that I will literally always cheer for him. I don't care who he's up against, I'm cheering for Eddie the whole time.

This match was amazing. Eddie and Bryan are so great at getting you emotionally invested in their matches. They both know what things they need to do for the audience to get hooked in, and they play those perfectly. The narrative of this match was perfect.

I went into this genuinely uncertain just who would win. The majority of the match didn't help matters. Eddie hitting the ring post with a chop, instead of Danielson, was a nice piece of drama to incorporate into things. I also liked how Danielson really made it a point to emphasize just how strong Eddie's chops are-- with commentary even pointing out Bryan things Eddie is better with chopping/upper body attacks.

A big narrative line through these Eddie Kingston Addresses the Blackpool Combat Club matches has been that BCC generally seems to think Eddie has the potential to be a lot better than he is, and they're trying to get that out of him. Except for Mox, they don't respect Eddie until he shows up and chops the fuck out of them. Eddie has always been on their level, but he doesn't believe in himself enough to really get there.

Great match. Just a great fucking match.

I know Eddie eventually is going to have to lose the belts. It's an inevitability unless just retire all of them simultaneously, but that seems unlikely. That said, I don't have to like it.

Wardlow vs Chris Jericho vs Powerhouse Hobbs vs Lance Archer vs Hook vs Brian Cage vs Magnus vs Dante Martin

Originally the Meat match, got changed up due to Reasons. I'll be honest, I didn't really care much about this match. I assumed Wardlow was going to win, because it didn't really make sense to do this repackaged presentation of him with Undisputed Kingdom, set up a match essentially to be like "Look at Wardlow slap all this meat" and then have him lose. The inclusion of the smaller guys was, like, fine. Dante Martin is great. Hook is fun. Magnus was also great. Chris Jericho was there.

I thought it was contrived and silly, but I also enjoyed when the smaller dudes all got knocked out of the ring so the bigger dudes could do a little pose off and have slap meat. But that's because the "MEAT" chants are hilarious to me.

My preferred ending to this match would have been if Wardlow had powerbombed Jericho for the win. But you can't get everything you want. Also, Wardlow using the Last Ride as his finisher is great. I wasn't the biggest fan of Bikertaker (and I believe he had only recently transitioned into Bikertaker whenever I fell off of watching WWF/E the first time) but Last Ride is such a great powerbomb.

A silly and fun match. It was a nice cooldown from Eddie/Bryan.

Roderick Strong vs Orange Cassidy, AEW International Championship

AEW's doctor said that OC wouldn't be cleared to wrestle unless they taped up his ribs and back. So the match starts with OC wearing a comical amount of kinesio tape. In a match against a man who is literally called "The Messiah of the Backbreaker".

Strong came to the ring wearing a white hooded cape and a skull-themed, like, paintball mask. I didn't recognize it at first, but I think it was intended to be something like Taskmaster from Marvel Comics. Which is kinda cool. I'm not as familiar with Taskmaster as much as other villains-- mostly because I just haven't read a lot of Marvel stuff.

Anyway, this was a good match. Roddy, as one would expect, beat the hell out of OC's back. I think OC did great at showing that he's just a beat down dude who has barely let himself take time to recover from any injuries. And having him go up against someone who basically specializes in hurting the area that OC was already injured was just perfect.

Roddy is great. The number of ways that man can spin something into a backbreaker is always impressive. I'm glad he won. I maintain that getting this win will absolutely help the legitimacy of Undisputed Kingdom.

Blackpool Combat Club (Jon Moxley & Claudio Castagnoli) vs FTR

I think that FTR is one of the greatest tag teams around today. I've said this before. I was a fan of theirs when they were in NXT as The Revival, and I loved their little Belt Collector run with AEW. In terms of non-WWE tag teams, they're usually right up there with The Young Bucks, and whether you're a fan of the Bucks or FTR really seems to boil down to the style you like to watch. The no-flips-just-fists of FTR is a great callback to the older era of wrestling, and the two of them do it well.

Mox and Claudio also do that very well.

This was a great match. These four dudes beat the shit out of each other, and I genuinely wasn't sure how the match would go.

BCC doing a Doomsday Device with a goddamn European uppercut was wild.

I think having Mox and Jon win was perfectly fine. FTR isn't going to be hurt by losing to these two dudes. They're fucking FTR. I could easily watch these four have several more matches together. There's a kind of respectful brutality with them.

That all being said, I do wish the meme of Mox bleeding every match-- or people being surprised when he isn't bleeding-- would finally die. He hasn't done it in a while.

Of course, half of Mox's character is basically some sort of blood freak with a violence fetish, so I still expect blood somewhere in his bigger matches.

"Timeless" Toni Storm vs Deonna Purrazzo, AEW Women's Championship

Mariah May coming out to Toni's old theme, with her old gear was a great touch.

Deonna is great. I'm happy to see her here. I'm glad that there's solid technical wrestling the women's division with her and Deeb being there. This was a solid match. I didn't really have a lot in terms of expectations-- I haven't seen a lot of Deonna's other stuff, but I knew she was good.

While I think it would have been fine if Deonna had one, I also think it may have been a bit too soon for that. Also, if Mercedes is debuting soon, that sets up a bit of a lose/lose if Deonna is the champion and they try to hook those two into a feud.

I definitely want to see more from Deonna. I think she would be a good person to take the TBS belt from Julia. I don't want her down in ROH-- but that's because ROH is a subscription service, and I don't currently have it (although I do want it, because Athena is one of my favorites).

I thought this was a solid match for both of them. Toni is always fun to watch in the ring. I'm curious to see where things go with both of them after this.

Will Ospreay vs Konosuke Takeshita

1 Like = 1 Bruv.

My expectation for this match was, quite literally, just that it was going to be a fucking fantastic match. Ospreay is one of the greats. Takeshita is steadily (and rapidly) approaching into the ranks of the greats.

I fucking loved this match. The crowd at the arena fucking loved this match. Every time Ospreay and Takeshita started in on each other, you could eat the people just get so into it.

Was this a dirty spotfest? Yeah. Of course. It's a Will Ospreay match. That's what he does. But you know what? I don't fucking care. I can enjoy watching ZSJ and Bryan Danielson spend an hour in the middle of the ring, trying to break each other's fingers and I can enjoy watching Ospreay and Takeshita jump around and flip and smash each other with elbows before jumping and flipping some more.

Spanish Fly is also one of my favorite moves to watch.

The match fucked. It humped. It was great. I loved it. It was A Spectacle if there ever was one. The kind of match you can eat popcorn to, although you're going to throw it everywhere because you jerking the bag around out of excitement. So much fun.

Samoa Joe vs Swerve Strickland vs HangMAD Hangman Adam Page

Did I want Swerve to win? Yes.

Did I want Hangman to win? Yes.

Did I want Samoa Joe to win? Yes.

Did I want Hangman to completely lose his mind and deliberately fuck over Swerve? Oh god, yes.

Swerve Strickland the most over wrestler who is not named "Sting" in AEW. There is nobody who comes close to this man. He literally broke into Hangman's home, and threated Hangman's infant child, and the crowd still loves him, because he's that fucking cool. And he's that good. Swerve's popularity is so strong that anyone who goes against him is going to be booed on some level.

Hangman has, as the upper-third of his name plate said, completely lost it. Wide-eyed, driven, and completely unhinged. Does he want the championship? Or does he just want Swerve to not have it?

Samoa Joe is Samoa Joe. We all love him. He's great on the mic. He's great in the ring. He feels credible and legitimate as a champion and a challenger. Having him be the champion for this feud is great.

A fantastic match. A ton of fun to watch. There was a perfect amount of drama for this thing. I loved it.

This match also cemented the double-turn for Swerve and Hangman.

Hangman, in an attempt to prevent Swerve from winning, beat up two different referees. The only way that's a babyface move is if your name is Bobby Heenan. Hangman's obsession with screwing over Swerve has caused him to start doing this stuff. I can't wait to see where they go with him now. Are they gonna change the music? Will they keep the goofy comments in the nameplate?

Swerve, by extension, refused to use Prince Nana's crown when it was offered, saying that he didn't need it. A thing that had been used before in matches against Hangman. There is an attempt here to have Swerve redeem himself for the deplorable things he's done.

In the end, Hangman tapped to Samoa Joe. Excalibur, help to sow the seeds that many people were wondering, posed the question if Hangman was tapping because he actually gave up, or if he was tapping to spite Swerve. I think it was the latter, because he's that much of a (justified) hater.

I am still 100% in favor of Hangman and Swerve fighting forever.

Sting and Darby Allin vs The Young Bucks, AEW Tag Team Championship

Sting's last match. Going out on his terms. This was a big deal for a lot of people. Even people who weren't in AEW. I knew this was going to be special.

Before the match starts, Ric Flair made his way down to the ring to take up space. Then, Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat came down as the guest timekeeper. They also showed various other wrestlers in the audience.

The Young Bucks come out in robes and have cannons shoot out business cards. It felt like a corporate Okada entrance. I liked it.

Darby came out as he does.

Then we got a little video package of Sting in an empty theater as they show various career highlights. In the end, he says, "It's showtime. It's showtime for the last time. Let's do this."

Sting's entrance starts with one of his sons dressed as a red, white, and blue-themed Surfer Sting, complete with the blonde hair. Another son is dressed as Wolfpac Sting. Then we have Sting show up.

While Tony Schiavone's voice isn't as strong as it was in WCW, you can tell during his initial commentary during the match that's definitely trying not to get emotional.

Watching Sting, and his two sons, do Stinger Splashes to the Bucks was great.

Tables, chairs, a ladder, and panes of glass were brought out. Panes. Multiple. A series of chairs were set up, and one or two sheets of the glass were placed on top, like a table.

Sting and Darby went through tables.

Darby jumped from the ladder (which was quite tall) and landed back first into Chekov's Glass-and-Chair Table. He laid on the ground for quite some time, his back just absolutely shredded.

Sting, also, went through glass. However, he had clothes on, and looked unscathed.

The match was chaos in the best way. I had no idea who would win-- I expected The Bucks to do something fucky to screw over Sting. They threw everything at him. He withstood multiple superkicks and BTE/EVP Triggers.

Eventually, Darby came back to life, and managed to keep Nicholas Jackson at bay long enough for Sting to throw on the Scorpion Deathlock. Matthew taps. Sting and Darby retain.

Sting's last wrestling match, and he goes out on top. I didn't expect that. I don't know why I didn't expect that. Tony Khan is a billionaire wrestling nerd, and Sting was/is probably a favorite of his. If there was ever a wrestler who deserved to go out as the winner, it's Sting.

If AEW is around long enough to have a "Hall of Fame", Sting needs to be one of the first people inducted (the first person has to be Brodie Lee, or I will personally fight Tony Khan). I hope they are around long enough for that.

Miscellaneous non-match things

PAC IS COMING BACK. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. I've missed that bastard.

KOR IS BACK. YESSSSSSSSSSSSS. I missed that goofy son of a bitch. I was so worried he wouldn't be coming back. I can't watch to see how he's going to be interacting with Undisputed Kingdom, since he seemingly rejected Roddy's offer to join.

Apparently Toni Storm called out Wendy Richter again in the post-show media scrum. Which I just find consistently hilarious.

In Summary

This shit was fucking fun as hell, dude. AEW is very consistent in having good quality PPVs. World's End was probably the weakest one I've seen, and even then, it wasn't bad. I can't wait to see the fallout of things on Wednesday.

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