#kind of messes in our own ways and things just climaxed in august (why is it always august. sighs)
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I've got more storage for my tablet arriving tomorrow, so once it does I might end up doing a graphic overhaul (its either that or art of a D&D character of mine, or both). Not even because of my dissatisfaction with my current graphics but as hopefully a good way to unwind. I've been... well life has been kind of kicking my and my family's asses recently and I think trying to more consistently do art and graphics again might help me cope. That's only if I really feel up for it anyway that is but we'll see I suppose.
#&& ooc / your local queen of brainrot#i dont wish to give details and ive already been venting to bestie about it so dw#all thats really needing to be known is just. family member's going through it mentally and that's been affecting all of us cause we're all#kind of messes in our own ways and things just climaxed in august (why is it always august. sighs)#the family member is going to therapy. they are getting help. so things are very slowly getting better. but shit's just been hard.#healing alas takes time. and so we simply take it day by day.#should i tag this as negativity. eh. i'll do it just to be safe.#tw negative
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[Book review] The Weight of Our Sky by Hanna Alkaf
Genre: Historical Fiction, Young Adult
Summary from Goodreads.com: A music-loving teen with OCD does everything she can to find her way back to her mother during the historic race riots in 1969 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, in this heart-pounding literary debut. Melati Ahmad looks like your typical moviegoing, Beatles-obsessed sixteen-year-old. Unlike most other sixteen-year-olds though, Mel also believes that she harbors a djinn inside her, one who threatens her with horrific images of her mother’s death unless she adheres to an elaborate ritual of counting and tapping to keep him satisfied. But there are things that Melati can't protect her mother from. On the evening of May 13th, 1969, racial tensions in her home city of Kuala Lumpur boil over. The Chinese and Malays are at war, and Mel and her mother become separated by a city in flames. With a 24-hour curfew in place and all lines of communication down, it will take the help of a Chinese boy named Vincent and all of the courage and grit in Melati’s arsenal to overcome the violence on the streets, her own prejudices, and her djinn’s surging power to make it back to the one person she can’t risk losing.
My view on this book: May 13, 1969 was the worst day in Malaysia’s history. Never ever people who still alive today who suffered during that time forgotten what had happened on that day. It was the scariest day in people life. Blood was everywhere. Nowhere to go. People do anything to survived that day. And the most shocking thing happened was people killed other. How bad is that? Government issued 24-hour curfew. Nowhere was safe. That is because there was a dispute (more like a war) between Chinese and Malay, while other race suffered between it.
The story was focus on Melati Ahmad, a not-so-normal 16 years old girl. Her appearance suggested that she was typical high school girl, who love to hang out with her best friend, Saf. However, Melati actually suffered a mental health problem, which is acceptable for today. However, not in the year of 60’s. Because there were lots of stereotype of people who suffered from mental health problem. Yes, people back day will call them crazy people (orang gila) which always will be send to asylum. Her mother, Salmah, couldn’t accept that and believe it was a disturbance from The Djinn, which is real for me since I had an experience with that. She always saw in her mind that her mother was killed in various ways. However, people need to remember that not every mental illness related to The Djinn. However, in order to not make Salmah worried about her, Melati told Salmah that she was no longer hear the invisible sound. The reason for this is because Melati lost her father before. She not only lost her father, but the same time, she also lost her faith in her god. Because god take her father from her. She always tapping her finger or anything in count of three, in order to ensure her mother was safe. She don’t want to lost her mother.
Melati already suffered from the mental tourture from The Djinn, she also suffered the guilt of she left her friend to be killed by the Chinese during the movie in cinema. Yes, the situation was real. My lecturer told me a story that during the time, when her friend and her boyfriend were walked out from the hall, all they can see were bodies who had been slash or killed. It was quiet, which was weird in Chaw Kit. Chaw Kit never quiet. And she was almost killed by mobs. This story was located in Petaling Street. Every Malay killed Chinese in the name of Allah, and every Chinese killed Malay because they can’t hold their angry anymore. Melati was saved by one Chinese aunty, (called Aunty Bee) as Aunty Bee told the mobs that Melati was Serani and she know Melati. That is how they spared Melati’s life. Melati was dragged by Aunty Bee and she had to left her best friend in the hall to be killed.
There were lots of tension after that. One of Aunty Bee’s son, Frankie doesn’t agree with her mother’s action. While Uncle Chong (Aunty Bee’s husband) and Vincent (Aunty Bee’s second son) welcome Melati as nothing had ever happened. The theme of racism was well played for this scene (heck, in every scene). Not only that, Aunty Bee also saved her neighbor as well, no longer care about their races. To her, they were all humans. However, Melati only can think about one thing, which is her mother.
Frankie never try to hide his disgust toward Melati, while Vincent was more opened toward others. He has the same thinking as his parents. He has better interaction with Melati, that made me also rooting for their relationship. My favourite interaction between both of them was when Melati opened up about her grieving for her father. And the reason why she loves The Beatles. Vincent knew how to ensure Melati about her insecurities. However, there were in the tough spot. Although Vincent support Melati, he also lost control of his anger toward her. That was when the Djinn was take over Melati’s mind whit her mother’s death scenario and Melati had to calmed down herself. She took her time while Vincent was in a hurry for reach his parents location (as their location was ambushed by the mobs).
Finally, there were separated as Melati want to search her mother and left Vincent’s family. She suffered lots and after a hardship, she finally found her mother nursing at the school while she was saving herself and another little girl from the mobs. Ethen, the boy who her mother was nursing was in a bad shape and he really need to take to the hospital. During that time, they encountered the mobs, which is surprisingly was joined by Frankie.
This is when the climax reach to the conclusion. Frankie almost got killed while saving Melati and her companions, and the one who saved him were Melati, Salmah and Vincent, who also was there. Frankie and Melati might had a sour relationship, but now they have a bond that they can’t never cut off.
When all was over, Melati, Vincent, Salmah, Aunty Bee and Uncle Chong visited Saf’s grave. Saf’s father blame Melati for everything that happened to his daughter. Melati have no choice but to grieve after months of Saf’s funeral. Saf was one of the statistic that was announced by the Government. 196 were dead in this bloody amok. However, it was believed that the number was more. How bad was that? The body that can't be recognized were buried together in one mass grave. There were people who can’t have the disclosure. They have nothing to grieve.
I think this book covers almost everything that can consider taboo or bad apples to talk especially during the 1960s. Mental health care, Malay believe everything bad happens because of the Djinn, religion, faith, grief, racism (which happened everywhere in the world), shitty politician (also it is a global thing), etc. However, it also covers kindness and love between family members and friends.
Lost someone that dear to you are already hard, however when you believe that you are the reason why they were dead, that was millions of times worst.
Every character was suffered. Not only from the riot, but from their surrounding. People were trapped in their hearts. To find different of us from the other was the way we handle and face our problem and situation.
The characters maybe fiction, but the situation was not. It was real. You can google May 13, 1969, Malaysia. It is hard to believed that it was happened after Independence Day on August 31, 1957. There were lots of factors that contributed to it. One of it was shitty politician. The other was racism among all races. My father told me that this is all British’s fault. The create this mess for long times ago and just leave it as nothing happened and no solution for the mess their had created.
How good this book?: 5/5
It is worth to read/buy?: Yes.
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35614314-the-weight-of-our-sky
Disclaimer: All the opinion about this book is based on my personal view!
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#8 - Finn Bálor
Pairing: Finn Balor x Reader
Requested: “Why didn’t you tell me it was your birthday?” from this prompt list I made
Word Count: 3,297
Author’s Note: wow smutty. wow i can’t believe i managed this. tag list at the bottom!! i love you guys :)
The days pass in a blur. One by one, they become the shadow of the present, the days no longer as vivid and fresh as they were exactly once. One day becomes two, two becomes a week, a week becomes a month, and a month becomes a year. And the years, they pass by faster and faster with each revolution around the Sun.
It’s upsetting, really. To grow old. To know that one day, you’re going to die. That one day, you will cease to exist. That your mind, your soul - that fragile, beautiful, thoughtful thing will cease to be. Because they have to be connected. Or maybe that’s just what our small, irrelevant minds are telling us in order to keep us from fearing death.
A part of you will always live on, they say. Only if you live life on your own terms, the way you want it, though most of us hardly ever do.
At least that’s what I was thinking when my birthday rolled around. It was a secret. A secret no one but Karl and I knew.
I wasn’t going to celebrate it. I don't believe in them. There’s no point in milestones if the end result is the same.
August 20th, 2017
The Eater of Worlds versus the Demon King.
My favorite kind of match. Supernaturally fueled, it was the best story of the night, in theory.
One man believed himself a god, and the other had the body of one.
Okay, I’m kidding.
One man believed himself a god and he wanted to provoke the only other being in the WWE who stood even close to what he thought of himself.
The God versus the Devil, you could say.
In reality, it was reversed.
Bray was the devil and Finn was the god.
We all know how that match turned out.
When Finn came back through the curtain, his entire body was coated in a gleaming, dripping sweat. The paint from around his ears had been messed with, but I was pleased to see the rest of it still caked on his shoulders and torso. It had been more than a year since the last time he wore the paint, and it was the first time I’d experience it since we met. I was determined to help him out of it.
But it wasn’t time yet.
I sat in the back, waiting. Everyone from R-Truth to Elias to Roman was backstage congratulating him and Bray on a job well done. He received a dozen claps on the back, to my dismay. I really, really wanted to see him in as close to full demon paint as I could, and every pat on the back had me giving sharp intakes of breath, waiting for their hands to pull back and catch the black, red, and white paint leaving his skin and depositing itself on their hands.
It was all for naught, though. It seemed that paint would never come off, and I breathed a sigh of relief.
His shadow loomed over me as I sat there, thinking about him.
“Watcha thinkin’ about, love?” He said as he held his hand out for me. I stared at the paint along his body, small bits cracking at the hard ridges of his abdominal muscles. My hand found its way to his navel, rubbing a circle around it.
“You,” I said bluntly, as I seemed to lack the gift of lying my ass off.
He chuckled, pulling me in for a kiss. It was sweaty, and sloppy, and gross. But I loved it all the same. There was something about the confidence with which he kissed me, the way he didn’t seem to care if anyone was watching. It was enough to drive a girl stark raving mad.
His voice dropped low and sensual as my arms tangled themselves at the back of his neck, his own hands finding their place at my hips when my top rose up. “What about me?”
Mouth gently on his ear, I channeled my inner confidence and nibbled at his earlobe, completely aware of how many people were still within a twelve foot radius. “About how sexy you look as the demon and that I can’t wait to help you scrub it all off.”
His mouth twisted into a lustful grin as he pulled our bodies closer together, my hips grinding into his. He kissed me, and as the kiss deepened I could feel his dick going hard at the thought of what I’d said. “Let’s go home, before I do something inappropriate to you in front of everyone, babe.”
“Excuse you?” came the sound of Karl’s voice from behind Finn. “I thought I was babe, not her. And the only inappropriate things being done right now are by me,” he said as he slapped Finn on the ass. A look down at Finn’s crotch made Karl grin, but he made no comment.
I glowered at Karl, mustering up my inner demons as best I could. He completely ignored me, choosing instead to pinch Finn’s side in front of me, making me angrier than I already was.
“Whaaat?” He toyed with me, clapping Finn on the back. “I just want to congratulate Bubba here on a damn good match.”
“Thanks, babe,” Finn beamed at him. Because of course he beamed at him. Karl stuck his tongue out at me, and my eyes narrowed further.
“No problem, Bubba, you know I love watchin’ you wrassle.” Karl winked, making Finn nearly drop to his knees in laughter. I rolled my eyes.
“Finn,” I pouted, arms crossing in front of me in irritation, “let’s go home.” All this talk and no play was making me impatient.
“You’re right, love, it’s late. I’ve made ya wait for me here long enough. See ya tomorrow, babe?” He turned to Karl, who nodded vigorously.
“‘Course ya will.”
As I stepped a few paces away to grab Finn’s things, I noticed Karl pulled him away, whispering something low in his ear. Finn nodded, and said goodbye to his friend with a too sweet. Karl looked back at me, smile wide. “See ya, girl!”
“Fuck you, Karl.”
“If we can make it a threesome with Bubba, sure.”
Finn keeled over laughing the entire way out of the Barclays Center.
My mood changed completely once we were alone. I was happy to have him with no one there to bother us. We got out of the taxi, bags in hand, Finn paying the cab driver and me fumbling with my keys to his small but cozy house in the city, crammed against the other various brownstones along the city block.
The door opened with a loud click, revealing Finn’s gorgeous little home that honestly always made me stand there breathless. How a man like that could have the interior decorating skills of an eighty-five year old grandmother, I’ll never know. But it was warm, beautiful, and cozy, and that was all right with me.
Not moments after the two of us entered his home, Finn had me pinned to the wall.
“I’ve been waiting all day for this, Finn,” I gasped, struggling to even breathe as his hands pulled down at my black camisole and his mouth planted itself on my nipple and began to suck on it.
“You’re not the only one, love,” his gravelly voice spoke between breaths of air, head leaning to the side to exhibit to me his sloppy tongue suckling at my breast like a dog’s. My hand found itself entangled his hair, pulling him back so I could gaze into his baby blues that had dilated nearly black in longing. Fuck, he was so hot. He knew how much it turned me on, watching his tongue flick back and forth. I could feel the wetness pooling between my thighs more and more with each passing second.
“Yeah?” I asked, my voice doing its best to be in control, to be the dominating one. “Prove it.”
“Ask and ye shall receive,” he replied, his other hand dropping my top lower, spaghetti strap forcefully being pulled down my arm, giving my (up until now) ignored breast a squeeze. I tried to bite back my yelp of pain and pleasure, honest. But he was just too damn much for me.
“Not so feral now, are ya, macushla?”
“Fuck, Balor, you know I love it when you speak Irish to me,” I growled, nipping fiercely at his earlobe as I had earlier in the night. He grunted, peeling me off the wall, his strong biceps carrying me towards the living room.
He turned on the dim lamp, the lamp coating the room in a hazy glow, perfect for the act of ferocious lust fulfillment. Or lovemaking, if it’s what you prefer. He lay me down longways, and my legs instantly began to shuffle in insecurity, pulling off my jeans quickly, my legs then clamping together to hide my indecent wetness, and I looked up at the beautiful Adonis of a man I had the great pleasure (and luck) of calling my boyfriend.
“No need fer all that, love.” Finn pushed the throw pillows off the couch, leaving one good one to slide beneath my head, and the rest of them fell to the ground with soft, muffled pats. Tentatively, he dropped to his knees on the couch, tortuously edging my thunderous thighs open with the touch of his fingers. His head dipped forward no longer being denied entrance, but not before I caught the rude, smirk of a smile dancing on his lips.
I was about to call him out on it, “What’s the smile f-” when I let out a surprised gasp as his tongue slid in between my folds. Below me, I could feel the shuddering warm breath of a man who was giving his all for me to experience due pleasure, and my nipples hardened at the sensation. His tongue continued to ravage me, up and down and all the directions in between, never flicking the same way twice, which drove me absolutely fucking crazy.
“Fuck, Finn,” I mewled, “do it to me again, just like that.” One hand in his hair and one hand squeezing my own breast for the fuck of it, my body was gradually nearing its climax. I could hear his grunts and moans as he listened to the dirty words that escaped my lips. “Damn you, Balor, my pussy’s gonna be raw before you even fill me with your dick.”
He palmed my belly, shooting down any strength I had to lift my hips closer to his masterful tongue. With one thumb, he circled his way around my clit, teasing me so excruciatingly that I swore I saw red for a moment. His tongue slipped out of me, and his body extended so that he was now looming over me, his mouth dipping down to catch mine, the taste of my juices strong and present on his tongue as he searched for mine.
“You really shouldn’t have said that before I got you off,” he said, “because now I’m not lettin’ you till you feel every fuckin’ inch o’ me.” Still in his black gear, it was easy to see that he wasn’t joking - I was gonna have to hold every damn inch of him. But I damn sure wasn’t going to regret what I said. He ground his clothed cock against my soaking folds, and I knew then he’d have to get new ring gear for Raw the next night.
My hands wrapped around him, nails grazing the painted skin on his back, and I enjoyed the hiss that ran between his teeth. Anything to turn him on. He was just like me, two sides of a coin. While the whole world saw him as this cute, adorable Irishman that loved to play with his legos and cuddle with his giraffe plushies, that darker part of him was only noticeable in glimpses in the ring. Those piercing blue eyes that stared right at the camera, mouth agape, tongue running across his lips, making any man or woman question their sexuality. He knew what he did to them, I know he did. But that was nothing compared to the way he acted when we were alone. The real demon loved to come out and frolic, and my body was his playground.
He ground into me, not at all bothering to rid himself of the fabric that parted us. A delicate, strong hand wrapped its fingers around my throat. Clawing all the way down his back, my hands came back around to thumb at his ripped torso. My nails were black as night, and it turned me on to know his back was going to be as red as my neck would be purple in the morning.
Finn looked at me with his darkened eyes, deep as the ocean and just as terrifying as a stormy sea. His own hands dropped to thumb at my hips, head dipping down to steal another kiss from me that I could feel made him rock hard and my pussy even slicker. “Think it’s time fer you to wash me off, mo rúnsearc.”
“Fuck,” I breathed, wrapping my legs about his waist as he picked me up and carried me up the stairs in his arms. I reveled in the feeling of them, smooth to the touch but hard to the bone. God, they felt so good wrapped around my body, the warmth of him seeping into me, drowning me in a soft burning flame of heat.
The echoes of his feet on the bathroom tile rang through my ears, and he dropped me on the edge of the large, bronze bathtub. He slid open the door of the glass shower, turning the dial. As the shower slowly filled the bathroom with steam, he dropped to his knees in front of me, hands gripping my thighs. I could swear the edge of the tub beneath my ass was already wet with anticipation.
He nipped open my legs, and began to lick a trail from the top of my slit to my breasts, hands kneading my nipples, hardening them again. My head dipped back, neck revealing itself to his broad palm. My breathing became ragged as I lost myself in the feeling of his tongue swirling circles around my breasts, senses heightening to a feeling of euphoria, the kind you feel right before a climax of amazing proportions.
And just as it began, it faded just as quickly as I realized Finn’s devilish tongue was no longer on my body. Instead, the whole of him had fully undressed, and I caught the glimpse of his perfectly peachy ass disappearing into the steaming shower without me.
“Wait,” I called breathlessly, annoyed and aroused all at once. I shut the glass door behind me, walking a few small paces before I bumped into his ass. Without thinking, I slapped it, the sound echoing off the glass, and I giggled mercilessly.
His growl reached me half a second before his hands had mine pinned to the glass, teeth biting at my neck before I could even get my apology in. It was a harsh, pleasurable pain that I could live with, but I winced all the same as a whimper escaped from my lips.
“We’ll see who’s laughin’ now, lass,” he grunted, his rock hard erection now filling me, my walls tightening against him. Without another moment’s notice, he wrapped my legs around his waist and began to thrust into me, helping me bounce on his lengthy cock, the feeling sending small waves of pleasure already with each thrust.
“Oh, God,” I moaned, my legs already losing their grip on him, and my arms wrapped around his body, scratching him thoroughly once more to hold on to him with every last ounce of strength I could muster. “Finn, that feels so good, babe.”
“Ya like that?” he whispered, voice hoarse and coated with lust. “Ya like me balls deep inside you?” Another quick succession of jack hammering thrusts.
“Fuck, yes, Finn, oh, fuck,” I screamed, one of my hands clenching around his throat, and I could feel his Adam's apple bobbing beneath it. His eyes looked up at mine, shadowed in painted darkness running down his body, eyes piercingly blue. He liked my hand around his throat, and I wasn't about to let him have all the fun.
His head dipped down, teeth clamping down on my nipple, and a shot of pain and pleasure coursed through me, the pleasure merging with the ecstasy of his cock rubbing at that one, delicate, euphoric spot.
“Macushla,” he growled, “I can feel it.” And I could feel it, too, every cell in my body could feel it as he pounded into me, rougher and faster, his balls slapping at my entrance. My tongue drew a trail at his ear as I begged him to come inside me.
“Come on, baby,” I moaned whorishly. “Fucking pound me, oh, Christ,” and then I was coming, my walls clenching tighter around his lengthy cock as he continued to jackhammer into me, my body trembling in wave upon wave of orgasmic pleasure.
“Shit, love, I - oh, fuck,” he cried, his cum shooting deep inside me, timed perfectly with my own spasming walls. His biceps embraced me tightly, making sure not to drop me before the waves of our lust subsided.
He sat down on the bench, me still on top of him, chests heaving as we tried our best to ease our breathing. I ducked my head, nuzzling at his nose, and I caught the brief glimpse of his smile. I reached behind his head for the body wash, content now to drip it on his shoulders, his torso, his powerful legs. I grabbed the loofa I insisted on buying, using it to lather the gel into foam, watching the black paint that still remained disappearing beneath it.
I was careful not to get any in his eyes, washing and rinsing all the way around his face, pecking small kisses across his cheeks. It seemed the demon was now careful locked away, because a bright eyed Finn glanced up at me, smiling gingerly, almost sad - melancholy, you could say.
My eyebrows furrowed, hands clasping at his jawline. “What is it, Finn?”
It took him a second to answer. “Why didn't you tell me it was your birthday?”
My breath left my body, a sense of panic overtaking me. So Karl had told him after all.
I busied myself with rinsing off the body wash, not bothering to look him in his truth-seeking eyes. “Birthdays are just like any other day. They don’t mean anything.”
He looked up at the ceiling, allowing me to scrub at his neck. With a sigh, “Yours means something to me, love.”
“Why?” I inquired softly.
“I find the anniversary of your birth quite important, mo rúnsearc. If you hadn't been born, I would never have met you.” He lifted my chin. “And that would be a very sad thing indeed.”
He kissed me. It was different from all the others we’d shared throughout the night. It was potent, passionate, all-consuming. As if he was trying to show me with all of his being how he felt about me, how important I was to him. Every fiber of my being seemed to respond, connecting to him, molding into him. And that’s when it hit me. This is what it felt like, to be alive.
I pulled away first, unafraid to look into his eyes, fingers scratching gingerly at his scalp. “I don’t want to forget this night, Finn.”
“Good,” he grinned, wrapping his arms around me. “Then I’ve done my duty.”
Last Note: ‘macushla’, irish slang for ‘mo cuishle’, meaning “my pulse”, or something similar, basically a term of endearment. ‘mo rúnsearc’, meaning “my secret”, a term used for a lover. forgive me if I didn’t use them correctly, and to those who know how to use them, i’d be down to have you explain it, as long as you’re not mean (:
Tag List: @llowkeys / @mewsburger / @hardcorewwetrash / @blondekel77 / @xxmaddhatter39xx / @crowleysqueenofhell / @unabashedwwesmut / @alexahood21 / @lip-sync / @we-work-hard / @the-geekgoddes / @sjwrites22 / @welshwitch5 / @wrasslin-x / @wrestlewriting / @roman-reigns-princess / @straight-outta-the-asylum / @idekwhatthisis / @wwetrashqueen / @reigns420 / @heelturn-timesten / @thephenomenonalkingofthebrogues / @leteverythingexist / @athoughtfulmindwrites / @0-inkmix-0 / @baronesscorbin / @smolsassynalilsmartassy / @wrestlingbabe/ @wrestlingnoob / @dark-blueheart13 / @birthday-prinxess / @meghanannexx / @thehardyboyz / @gelinas22 / @omegamanx / @championnatalya / @heelturn-timesten / @toosweetme / @gurimujox / @deanammbrose / @baleesi / @balor-babe / @balorclubbabe / @neversatisfiedgirl / @cute-face-chubby-waist / @xfirespritex / @morgunsilver / @aneclecticwriter / @gator-wave / @itsnethbellins / @reisabrisingr / @nopeitsnat / @selinamasri / @wwesmutdonedirtcheap / @wwe-smutfics / @therumbleramble / @lasskickingwithstyle / @tearfulsparks78 / @0miss-fandomness0 / @xstylesxclashx / @chasingeverybreakingwave / @newjapan / @lavitabella87 (trying to tag some people i think might enjoy it too?? lol sorry)
#wwe#finn bálor#wwe imagine#finn balor#finn balor imagine#wwe fanfiction#finn balor smut#demon king#wwe smut#wwe raw#my fics#fic request#mine
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