#kim theerapanyakun meta

[live-from-flaturn]

Here's How Kim Theerapanyakul Qualifies as a Greek Tragic Hero:

I accidentally came up with this thesis statement while chatting with @shou-jpeg (as per usual) and they encouraged me to expand on it... so here's the outcome of my academic fandom ramblings!

From page 17 of “The Poetics of Aristotle”, as translated by S.H. Butcher:

1. A perfect tragedy should, as we have seen, be arranged not on the simple but on the complex plan. It should, moreover, imitate actions which excite pity and fear, this being the distinctive mark of tragic imitation. It follows plainly… that the change of fortune presented must not be the spectacle of a virtuous man brought from prosperity to adversity: for this moves neither pity nor fear; it merely shocks us.

Layman's Translation: The perfect tragedy is complicated. No matter what story is used, the main emotional payout should be pity and fear for the Hero. In order to achieve this, you cannot simply punish a good man for no reason. Shock will not induce catharsis [emotional release].

2. Nor, again, that of a bad man passing from adversity to prosperity: for nothing can be more alien to the spirit of Tragedy; it possesses no single tragic quality; it neither satisfies the moral sense nor calls forth pity or fear. 

Layman's Translation: A bad man cannot receive good fortune. That goes against the entire point of tragedy and will only frustrate the audience further. 

3. Nor, again, should the downfall of the utter villain be exhibited. A plot of this kind would, doubtless, satisfy the moral sense, but it would inspire neither pity nor fear; for pity is aroused by unmerited misfortune, fear by the misfortune of a man like ourselves. Such an event, therefore, will be neither pitiful nor terrible.

Layman's Translation: The story cannot end with the downfall of an obvious villain. It satisfies the audience’s desire for justice but doesn’t leave them pitying the Hero or fearing the story’s eventual outcome. Once again, this ending would be void of catharsis/emotional release.

4. There remains, then, the character between these two extremes,—that of a man who is not eminently good and just,- yet whose misfortune is brought about not by vice or depravity, but by some error or frailty. He must be one who is highly renowned and prosperous,—a personage like Oedipus, Thyestes, or other illustrious men of such families.

Layman's Translation: 

A good Tragic Hero must: 

Be royalty or nobility (he might also come from a well-known or wealthy family).

Be morally grey (if he is too Good or too Bad it will prevent the audience from projecting onto him and achieving catharsis). 

Cause his own downfall or “catastrophe” by making a mistake (an extension of his Hamartia, or “error” / ”inherent flaw”).

So how does Kim fulfill the requirements of a Tragic Hero?

He is from a well-known family and has an image to keep in check. Because of his role as Wik/an idol, Kim must present himself as a kind or at least pleasant person to the general public. Much like Oedipus or Electra, Kim has an outward persona whose specific responsibilities play a role in his fall to hubris. 

a. As Kimhan Theerapanyakul he is required to do his father’s bidding on some level. We know he’s at least somewhat beholden to Korn from the scene with Tankhun screaming, “I don’t know where they [Porsche and Chay] have gone!”

2. Does it get any more morally grey than a guy willing to kill a dozen men in cold blood (with his bare hands) to protect his pseudo-ex-boyfriend? Or date an underclassman fanboy only to commit minor felonies against him/his family? Or go against his father (rebellion against the family is a BIG no-no in Greek Tragedy!!!) and attempt to escape the fate of his bloodline? 

3. I doubt this part really needs explaining… But trying to protect Chay by lying to his face and destroying their relationship, only to turn around and beg for Chay’s forgiveness via blatant musical plagiarism, is probably Hamartia at its finest.

4. It's Kim! He is "a man who is not eminently good and just,- yet whose misfortune is brought about not by vice or depravity, but by some error or frailty". His greatest loss is brought about by his own poor decision making and furious need for freedom/independence. His determined self-flagellation only ever hurts the people around him while we as the audience scream for him to stop. He qualifies for the Tragic Sadboy Squad!

[emberfaye]

@vani-ash

Hi! I've actually talked about Kim and the bodyguards before but I'm not sure where.

So filmania kim has one scene with the bodyguards that I remember, and all the bodyguards seem really excited he's here and are disappointed he did nothing but swap cars.

Boc kim is a dick to big, of course. Mocking and rude and such. But!!!

Big was able to access his house and kim kept his back to big the whole time. That to me reads a lot more of a relationship than a normal bodyguard, I personally think there's a few different types of things that happened that make them have that kind of relationship. Bigs face when kim says those things is also soooo interesting. But regardless yes.

We see kim and big a few more times and kim even jokes around with big in his own way, but it's important that kim trusts big enough to speculate his thoughts to big. If they didn't have some sort of trust and history kim would hage kept his mouth shut.

Kim and big work as a great team to go against tawan and Vegas. Ultimately kim does leave with chay, but he fires at tawan when big gets stabbed.

We see him with Chan during korns death announcement, and it's very much a stare down.

We see Kim rip Pol off khuns arm but doesn't do anything else to Pol, nor does he rip arm away. Iirc right, Pol is more exaggerated against pulling khun back so that's imo a "get off him" more than being rude or mean or cold.

And then Chan says Korn wants to see you to kim and kim doesn't react meanly to chan.

So ymmv but ultimately I think kim is someone who treats the bodyguards professionally but probably also on a different level than his family. I think he treats them on more equal footing of "doing their jobs but are people" and when he lived in the mansion, he probably hung around them a lot more than his other two brothers or dad did. Training meals etc.

We know he has at least two friends who he talks casually with and who know his business.

I don't see Kim as rude in general, but he's very ruthless in what he perceives as situations .

[aeternallis]

A Deep Dive: Kim’s Fight Scene in Yok’s Bar

I’ve been thinking about this scene a lot lately, and I just have so many thoughts on it. 

Like low-key, but imo what makes this scene so mesmerizing yet also chilling at the same time is the fact that Kim never eliminates the possibility of Chay turning around at any time and witnessing Kim kill in order to protect him. 

Whereas Porsche tends to protect Chay by keeping him from seeing the reality of the mafia life (and tragically blindsides both himself and his brother because of it; Chay because he remains ignorant of his new environment and Porsche because his judgement of the risks in keeping Chay ignorant is impaired due to his overprotectiveness), Kim protects him only from the danger of it.

It’s an all around interesting narrative choice from BOC, especially considering that it’s Kim’s one fight scene in the entire series. 

I’ve seen many posts on here before of how Kim leaves the dead bodies for Chay like a feral cat or that he really took the mantra “nobody disturbs my man” up a notch or two, and while I definitely agree with all that on a surface level, I can’t help but think there’s so much more going on. Dare I say, maybe even a little manipulative? Hmm. 

Because for reals, there’s a reason why this fight scene makes such an impression on so many fans--the KimChay fans (including myself), in particular--and I think it’s because so much of the context of the fight, as much as the fight itself and the events leading up to it, reveals so much about Kim’s character post-break up w/ Chay. 

Like yes, there’s the aesthetic reasons and ofc, Jeff Satur and that beautiful face of his that looks like it was sculpted on a Saturday by the gods, but there’s just so much to be said in the way he’d fought and more importantly, ended the fight. 

@wildelydawn​ wrote up an amazing meta post  about how Kim fights, for which I highly recommend y’all read if you haven’t already. I definitely agree with the idea that Kim likes to play with his prey when he fights; he knows how to improvise and use his environment as sources of weapons, and he’s definitely got a bit of a sadistic streak going for him, lol. 

Now, where am I going with this? Well, let’s very briefly look at the events leading up to the fight: from the moment they break up in ep 11, to one of the very last scenes in ep 13 when Kim finds out that Porsche and Chay have left the tower, somewhere in between those events, Chay had become Kim’s singular goal and most important priority. Whereas before his goal had been to investigate Porsche and Chay’s connection to the Theerapanyakun family, directly after the break up is when this plotline falls through because his investigation hits a dead end at the temple. 

For me personally, methinks it’s the moment he finds out that Chay skipped his college interview in ep 12 and what a massive fuck up he’d just committed. As much as I adore him as a character, I don’t really think he knew the repercussions of his own actions until it was too late, alas. Ultimately, he’s not responsible for Chay’s choices, but he can’t deny that his previous actions influenced them. 

Whether it was wanting to confess his own feelings to Chay, or perhaps setting him straight because he skipped his college interview, or wanting to keep him safe, or even just to talk to him and clear the air--the point is, regardless of his reason(s), getting to Chay becomes his next target. And more than that, once Kim sets his crosshairs on a goal--especially on this one person he’s got a romantic attachment to--he is positively ruthless. 

You barely see it from how fast the camera cuts out, but if you pause at just the right moment, you can see how Kim’s expression is absolutely seething when Korn stops him from going to look for the Kittisawasd brothers (or perhaps even just Chay himself). 

This is the expression of someone who’s more than willing to obliterate anyone who gets in the way of him and his goal. This is an expression of utter resentment. This is the expression of someone who’s itching for a fight, because the universe dared to get in between him and his goal. 

(Side bar: I’m pretty sure part of the reason Jeff got the role of Kim Theerapanyakun is because of how intense his method acting can be. He doesn’t have many roles under his belt just yet, but if you haven’t seen He She It, I recommend giving it a go. His acting in that mini drama is a little rough around the edges, but the raw intensity by which he plays the character of Mike definitely highlights some of Jeff’s natural talent. He knows how to act with his eyes and his entire body, and when given the right director to guide him, as we’ve seen when he portrays the role of Kim, he truly thrives in his role.)

Yet still, for all his anger at being prevented by his father from getting to his goal, he’s mindful enough to know that he can’t just go against his orders either. Korn is the enemy of an entirely different caliber, and Kim perfectly knows how and when to pick his battles.

But it isn’t until we see him in the next ep quietly watching Chay from the bar that another facet of his character growth is revealed to us: by this point in time, he’s comfortable in his feelings for Chay enough that he can finally allow himself to luxuriate in his presence, even whilst knowing he’s in the metaphorical dog house.

His arms are propped up, his legs are loosely crossed, his body language is relaxed, whilst still very much aware of his surroundings. Keep in mind, this is the first time since the morning of the kidnapping that we see him perfectly content in Chay’s presence, now fully aware that there’s no reason for lies between them anymore. The only one left is the one he has to fix.

Yet, after all this time of trying to get ahold of Chay ( @bitacrytic​ wrote an interesting piece about Kim’s unsettling behavior when he realized Chay had cut him off, which I also highly recommend), why didn’t he take the opportunity to talk (or whatever it is he intended to do) when he was finally within sight? The camera shot of Chay talking to Yok on his phone, as well as of Kim sitting on the stool, lingers for a good 20-25 secs, so the audience is given a hint that Kim has been there for a while.

So why not take advantage of this chance?

And the answer to this question, I think, is what’s at the heart of the matter and basically defines the connotation of the entire fight.

Kim is not a fool, he knows for the time being he’s number 1 on Chay’s shit list. And because of this, it may be a stretch to say it, but I will anyway: perhaps off screen, from the moment he had him within sight, Kim may have realized that it would do him no good to talk to Chay at that moment. Not when there’s an imminent threat lying in wait, not when the heartbreak is still too raw for both of them. 

Most of all, Chay has no reason to trust him right now; it would just be a repeat of their disastrous confrontation in the club.

And he knows all too well that he cannot afford to sabotage what truly little standing he has left in Chay’s good graces. So he plays it cautious and takes the next best thing: he’ll bask in Chay’s presence, keep him company (albeit one-sided). If you scroll back up real quick and see his expression in the promotional image, it’s almost as if he’s thinking to himself, ‘keep your eyes on the prize--on him. he’s the only one that truly matters.’ 

But even so, Chay’s safety is his priority for the moment and there’s just so many reasons Kim is itching to vent some anger and frustration: the boy he loves has cut him off completely, Daddy is hatching up some plan again, besides the ongoing 4D chess game he’s got going on with all his sons, his investigation led him nowhere. Yet lo and behold, here comes some goons who not only disturbed his peaceful serotonin-gathering session (unbeknownst to Chay), but are also looking to either use the love of his life as leverage in a conflict that barely has anything to do with him, or just outright kill him. 

Really, no one can blame Kim for going a little overboard, not when these poor suckers basically offered themselves to him on a silver platter. Lol 

While I won’t go too deep into analyzing the physicality or choreography of the fight itself, I’d like to instead focus on all the things Kim chose/chose not to do, which again, says so much about his character and brings me back to my overarching thesis for this long ass rant: Kim never eliminates the possibility of Chay turning around at any time and witnessing Kim kill in order to protect him.

Kim doesn’t call out for Chay to run: this makes sense, it’s a practical choice; he doesn’t want these men to draw their attention on Chay. So long as they’re focused on him, so long as he distracts them--he can kill them one by one. 

Kim doesn’t draw the men away from the bar: an interesting choice that seems like it never crosses Kim’s mind. He’s more than agile enough to have led them away from where they’d entered, yet he keeps them all inside. 

Kim didn’t wait for them outside: another interesting choice. Arguably, it would have been more efficient for him to have taken some bodyguards and do a stake out. Further still, it’s also arguable this choice is more an emotional one (he wants Chay where he can see him, dammit), but that’s up for debate. 

Kim waits until the last possible second to use a gun: a risky choice, but he pulled it off quite well. He doesn’t go for the gun until the goons have him surrounded within Chay’s vicinity, so he goes for fast kills to end the fight even if it’s not his personal preference. Imo, it’s very obvious throughout the fight that he finds some satisfaction in twisting limbs and breaking bone, so good on him that he got to indulge for a bit. 

And finally, immediately right after the fight, he never tries to pull this one over Chay’s head: 

This one is pretty self-explanatory, I think. Hahaha. 

But after Kim shoots the last man, he doesn’t linger for too long. Which again, why doesn’t he take advantage of yet another chance that’s fallen onto his lap to talk to Chay? The danger has been dealt with for now, after all. Why not at least attempt at some sort of clean up, maybe pile the bodies on one corner so Chay doesn’t trip over them? :’D If not to talk to Chay, why not at least linger in the shadows, to make sure Chay is all right (he’s bound to turn around eventually)? 

Instead, he walks away, still panting a bit from the fighting and without a doubt, from the adrenaline rush. His body language is hard to read because his silhouette is blurred, but it’s at this point that BOC could have easily concluded this scene. 

They could have left this scene as is, and made the aftermath of the fight as vague as possible, because for what it’s worth, it would have still accomplished one of the main points for KimChay: Kim’s priority is Chay’s immediate safety. 

But it’s not the end of the scene. BOC made damn sure that we would see the aftermath, and with it--the changed dynamic between these two characters and the very implications of it. They didn’t leave it vague whatsoever, they pretty much shoved it in our faces. 

This scene--this f*cking scene RIGHT HERE--blows wide open a potential trajectory of KimChay’s love story if/when we ever get a season 2.

I think for the first and only time in the show, this shot of Kim sitting on the stairway, enjoying a cigarette after a murder spree, mind you—is the first time we see him fully stripped away of any pretenses in not only the way he loves and protects someone, but how far he can get lost within his own emotions when he has no reason to hold back. He doesn’t even look the least bit concerned for Chay’s emotional well-being, because that’s not his priority when he chose to leave those men lying on the bar’s floors. 

If anything, in this specific situation, not holding back benefits him greatly. 

For the first time, his character in the show is explicitly elevated to the same level of batshit insane as Kinn and Vegas, perhaps even beyond them.

We’ve seen how WiK had won over Chay, of how tender Kim could be with him, but the fight in Yok’s bar and the conclusion of it afterwards, demonstrates how far Kim’s sharpest, most deadliest aspect of himself—Kimhan, will go in order to win back Chay. Even in trying to get Chay within his orbit once more, he remains just as calculating: he doesn’t let his own gut instinct (actually wanting to talk with Chay) get the better of him; he uses the situation, in this case--even Chay--to give himself the best advantage. Can you imagine how terrifying that is? 

It’s no wonder Korn calls him the strongest, yet most dangerous of the Theerapanyakul heirs: regardless of whether Kim holds back or not depending on the given situation, he remains just as sharp, just as deadly, just as cunning. In the first KP novel, Korn presents a question to the readers indirectly: in their world, is love a weakness or is it strength?

For Kim, the answer is obvious: it’s a weakness, but he won’t allow it to be one for himself or for Chay. 

And due to all this, there’s only one conclusion I can come up with as to what this shot of Kim sitting on the stairway outside Yok’s bar was trying to accomplish:

Kim—this conniving, devious, gorgeous motherfucker—absolutely wanted Chay to see the dead bodies now littering Yok’s bar.

In fact, I can even argue that he seemed to have been waiting for confirmation that Chay saw his “present.” That he had all the time in the world to make sure his bae got a good look at his kills.

Why, you ask? Simple. Kim trusts Chay’s backbone made of steel. He trusts him to be able to handle it. Why else would he let himself enjoy a smoke after killing 6 people in 6 mins? Why doesn’t he look concerned?! Why not give Chay some comfort, goddamn...! We know this fucker is in love w/ Chay, the dumbass was crying over his polaroids earlier that day. //sobs 

But in all seriousness...Kim has firsthand experience of going up against it, doesn’t he? He himself saw how determined Chay could be when he cut himself off entirely from Kim, both from when he pulled his hand away in the club and then blocking his number a day or two later. I don’t necessarily think it’s that Kim overestimated Chay’s love for him, but rather he initially underestimated Chay’s resilience in keeping him away after breaking his heart so terribly.

This son of a bitch (affectionate) sobbed his pathetic heart out after finding out Chay blocked his number, probably took a good look at himself (and Chay’s cute polaroids), and came to one conclusion: “yeah, Chay can handle me. I can go all in now.”

In fairness, Chay’s steadfastness can only improve and strengthen from here on out. Kim--although in love with Chay, but does have his moments of volatile moods and cold verbal wit--is not an easy person to love, as Chay is slowly finding out the hard way. He must be able to confidently call Kim out when the latter needs to be reminded to respect him, that Chay will not take any of his shit. 

Ironically enough, in creating an original story for these two characters in the show, it also brings them closer to the dynamic they have in the novel, imo. I myself have only read parts of the novel, and because we barely see KimChay in the book, it’s hard to tell how much closer show!KimChay is to novel!KimChay, but there’s hints of some similarities here and there in terms of character dynamics. Make of that what you will~ 

Let’s play Devil’s Advocate for a hot sec though, and address the rebuttal: “but won’t this only drive Chay further away from Kim and a life in the mafia?”

My answer to that is: will it though? Chay has more reasons to stay in the world Porsche forced him to enter than he ever has in leaving it. BOC cemented this fact when they decided to keep Namphueng alive, nevermind the fact that Chay’s one positive, healthy parental figure, is now the minor family head and as much as he’d like for it not to be true, he’s still in love with Kim. 

But to reiterate, Kim trusts Chay’s backbone made of steel in a way that Porsche doesn’t (again, due to aforementioned overprotectiveness, which also serves as the fundamental difference in how they both protect Chay). But the reasoning behind placing his trust in Chay isn’t entirely selfless either. 

He trusts Chay to be able to handle the disturbing scene of the dead bodies he left behind, because he has something to gain from it.

By leaving behind the dead goons for him to find, Kim inadvertently breaks another piece of Chay’s upright perception of the world, ensnares him further into Kim’s reality—and most of all, to Kim himself.

It’s a terrifying level of honesty (and wooing??) coming from Kim because it’s so brutal in its execution. What makes it even more frightening is that he’s genuinely doing this out of his desire to be with Chay. His priority during the fight is Chay’s safety, yes, but his overarching goal after their break up remains the same: to get Chay back. 

It drives home the fact that although Kim loves only a handful of people in his life, he loves them fiercely to the point of questionable insanity.

[obscurecurse]

Kim's Balcony

I haven't decided what it all means yet but I'd like to present some figures on Kim cinematography.

It dawned on me yesterday that the first/last of Kim's scenes both take place on the balcony in his apartment. I wanted to revisit these scenes in order to consider the directorial choices because I suspected there might be some subtext there.

1. The first time we as the audience see Kim he is behind a screen, obscured. He's basically in another room from the viewer with the separation of glass and metal. He stands in daylight but there's no lights on in the apartment. We are not shown his face.

Starting with some face-value observations: scenes taking place on this balcony give the viewer a sense of how high up Kim's apartment is, how it overlooks the city, suggesting wealth, status. This is also his fortress, his safe space. He's physically elevated from the city, suggesting otherness - being "above" or isolated from other people. He's always shown alone in his isolated, other place, or starts off alone to be visited only by house staff. (Almost every Theerapanyakun has a scene like this, if memory serves.) Cities don't always have to represent isolation and power, by any means, but in Kim's case I think they do.

Obscuring him like this is purposeful. He is meant to be obscured narratively. (To the point that on the first watch I thought he was going to rise to the occasion of "main villain.") His blurring protects a thread of crucial reverse dramatic irony - because Kim knows way more than all of us for, like, most of the show.

2. But in his last scene he is no longer obscured:

We see him more clearly, both literally and narratively. His motivations were made clear and now they have completely shifted. The screen that previously made him unclear is just out of focus on the edge of this shot.

3. And then we see him even closer in his video for Chay. The camera just keeps zooming in on his framing, scene for scene. (When Chay watches Kim's video he is also set against the city, btw, in similar isolated conditions. Hmmmm. So close yet so far in their impasse.)

4. This extended shot after he sends the video does not really add to my meta but it's really a long shot of him looking emo and holding the guitar. I am curious as to whyyy he is always set against the context of the city in these shots? What is the significance there? To remind us his family owns the city?

But thennnnNNNN:

5. ....???!!!!?!?!?!!? Kim walks out of frame. I'm sure he needs to go pour a shot after being so vulnerable with Chay, but narratively, narrativelyyyyyy... He's abandoned his post! This was the place he started, and he no longer needs (or maybe even wants) to put himself in that position. HmmmMMMMMMMMM.

[wildelydawn]

Kim Prefers Using His Hands.

What’s really crazy about Kim is that in this moment, he could’ve picked up the gun and shot this man dead, but instead, he chooses to savagely beat him with his own fists and then, when faced with another goon, decides to take a bottle to his head and then cleans his hands before starting up again. Like he’s taking care of his greatest weapon: himself.

Kim doesn’t always need a gun, as the start of the fight scene shows us this, but he chooses not to use a gun here because he wants to physically beat these guys down, and his face after he kicks the gun away definitely depicts a man who enjoys hands on violence.

At the very end, when Porchay is mere inches from danger and he’s surrounded, only then does he get a gun and expertly kills four people via gunshot. And when the last guy gets up, Kim’s body language appears almost passive, uninterested while shooting him down. 

Dare I say that Kim finds gun violence boring. Dare I say he finds it too easy to shoot people. He rather tear people apart with his bare hands. And that’s terrifying.

[live-from-flaturn]

I love when Kim discovers the Wik shrine in Chay’s room and they play some heavy, horror-adjacent slow piano over it while the camera pans... 

Like Kim himself doesn’t have an enormous fucking oil painting of his own face in the middle of his living room to hide his murder mystery conspiracy board.

Chay is not the unhinged one here.

[wildelydawn]

Like it or Not, Kim is on a Coming of Age Journey Too (a Character Analysis/Meta).

*I’m not excusing what Kim did, but I get why he did it, and that’s what is leading to this post. This is just my analysis and opinion.

Yes. I do have beef with Kim for leaving Porchay in a drug ridden club, but it was that moment that made me realize that Kim’s on a coming of age journey too, even though he’s 22(?) in the television series. In my previous post, I explained what a Bildungsroman is, and to some degree, Kim fits into that definition. More precisely though, he fits into Künstlerroman, which translates into “the apprenticeship novel” and is a novel that details the progression of an artist, musician, or painter. A famous example of a “successful” Künstlerroman is James Joyce’s Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, though I have read other stories of “failed” Künstlerroman stories (failed as if the artist dies, does not achieve his goals as an artist, etc). Here, with Porchay’s coming of age journey in mind, I am suggesting Kim is on a coming of age/artist journey as well: one that intertwines art and obligation.

**Edit: Please read the replies for a literal translation of the term Künstlerroman which, in German, actually translates to “the artist’s novel.

However, Kim’s special in a lot of ways; usually the Künstlerroman ends with the artist rejecting commonplace and ordinary life; this is because the artist is determined to live an artistic life. Breaking with the traditional definition, Kim does this from the get-go. From the start of KinnPorsche, we know that Kim rejected his version of the commonplace life: the youngest son of the Mafia family. He escapes to become an artist, and continues to pursue that dream (as we see he’s still in school, teaching others how to play, etc.) This is important to keep in mind because as we break down Kim’s aspects of the Künstlerroman, his “ending/end goal” may be different from Porchay’s, despite both of them being aspiring musicians.

1) Loss

Despite being in his early twenties, I’m still going to suggest that Kim’s on a coming of age journey, particularly one heavily tied to identity and art, because he also experiences the first three aspects of the Bildungsroman/Künstlerroman. Kim and loss are just as intertwined as Porchay and loss. Kim’s lost a parent, and he causes the loss of his relationships with his brothers (as in, he chooses to stay away from them.) Kim is at a loss when it comes to identity, constantly being pulled in so many directions due to his love of music and due to his obligations towards the Main family. It is a culmination of these losses that makes him embark on a journey for answers. Like Porchay, loss develops Kim’s sense of morality; he is willing to do whatever it takes to find answers to protect the ones he loves. In a way, he’s on the other end of the spectrum. Decisions for Kim are black and white. But his reasonings behind them are any shades of gray that let him continue onto his journey.

2) Journey

These losses and potential losses (the threats on his family) also begin the search for answers. Kim travels far and wide to find answers: he goes back to the home he’s escaped. He sneaks around his father’s study. He visits Porchay’s home, the music studio, and the temple all to find answers. He is, to some degree, on a journey to find truth and to further establish who he is as an artist (in relation to that truth). Like Porchay, for Kim, loss is a part of the journey. He, to some degree, loses Porchay, the person he is on this coming of age journey with, and he’s prepared for this loss for quite some time. However, he’s not exactly okay with this loss (as we found out in episode 12 when he tries to guide Porchay again) and it is impacting the actual trajectory of his journey. He’s now focused on who killed Porchay’s parents as he is now on a journey for answers for the person he cares about.

3) Conflict

Kim’s got a multitude of conflicts that can progress and hinder his coming of age journey. I’m going to put aside his conflict with Porchay because to be honest, Kim’s at conflict with himself, and it's manifesting into shouting at Porchay. Kim’s journey is heavily tied to Porchay’s because of parallel losses (familial, mostly) and because Porchay is now involved in the mafia family. But the conflict is more layered than Porchay simply acting out. Kim’s conflict is that Porchay has a choice to do whatever he pleases: Kim has never had that choice. Kim probably had to fight, and continues to fight, for the artist’s journey he’s on. To see Porchay throw that away is a huge blow to Kim’s belief system. Kim’s also at conflict with the mafia family that is the biggest obstacle to his formation as an artist. Kim is trying to fight against a system that very few thrive under (and here, I’m thinking about Kinn admitting that he does not like the glitz and glamor of a mafia lifestyle and prefers a quiet life with Porsche). Kim’s also at conflict with his art; it’s increasingly difficult to create art without Porchay, so pushing Porchay away ultimately aggravates this internal/artistic conflict.

4) Maturity

Let’s face it. Kim’s not very mature. He’s pushing away people who want to help and care for him. He’s just as volatile when it comes to emotional decisions as Porchay (if he really thought yanking Porchay out of the club would help… then I got news for you, Kim). But, we see a glimpse of maturity from him when he drags Porchay out. From his facial expressions, the way he parts and closes his mouth several times, you can tell Kim is holding back a huge lecture/tantrum. You can tell he’s opting for giving Porchay choices rather than taking them away. And of course, we should be wary of this; he is definitely calculating, he’s definitely clever, but he’s certainly not mature because shouting at Porchay is not the way to get through to him. 

Perhaps an allusion to both of their adulthoods/maturities is when their confrontation happens in front of this sign: “ARE YOU READY YEAH!” There’s a few ways to interpret this. The sign could literally be asking both characters if they’re ready to pursue adulthood. Kim walks away from the sign; he has no choice but to pursue the adulthood he knows of (murder, mafia, loss, etc). That’s how he was raised; that’s all he knows. On the other hand, Porchay stays near the sign, hesitant to broach adulthood. He’s not ready for the adulthood that Kim’s grown up with. 

Another way to read this is that the sign has no question but provides the answer; whether they are ready or not, their respective coming to age journeys are reaching a climactic point. YEAH. As in, neither of them have a choice; adulthood, with its successes and failures, is here. Regardless, Kim’s attempt to embrace adulthood through whatever the Mafia defines it as is not mature; it’s the desperate actions of a young man trying to formulate his identity.

What does maturity look like for Kim, then? In my opinion, it must have some sort of self-responsibility and accountability, which I don’t think Kim has taken yet. His journey, whether as artist or mafia son, has trampled on so many, and until he faces that, his Künstlerroman might end terribly. The Künstlerroman usually ends with the artist rejecting everyday life and opts for one that culminates to an unstable but artistic life. That’s what Kim had at the start of KinnPorsche, and that’s what he has now, so I am eager to see how his journey ends. I would want Kim to return to a life of art, a place where he can be who he is, but until Kim takes that responsibility, he is just as immature as Porchay and therefore, still on a coming of age journey. 

Read my companion piece to this, Porchay is on a Coming of Age Journey (a Character Analysis/Meta) here.

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KinnPorsche: The Series:

Meta Posts (?):

KimChay General Thoughts/Predictions (Ep 7)

KimChay Thoughts & Possible Connection to Music? (Ep 8)

KimChay Thoughts Part III: The Tables Have Turned (Ep 9)

KimChay Thoughts Part IV: Resilience & Eggs (Ep 10)

KimChay Thoughts Part V: They Were Friends (Ep 13)

The (Potential) Symbolism of Kim’s Necklaces (Ep 4-10)

The (Potential) Symbolism of Kim’s Necklaces (Ep 11-13)

The (Potential) Symbolism of Kim’s Necklaces (Ep 14)

Kim Prefers Using His Hands. (Ep 14)

For Vegas, Living is/was Painful. (Ep 14) (TW: Suicide)

Dear Kim Theerapanyakun. (a love letter)

My Recent FanFiction:

🖤 Bittersweet Chocolate, 90%. (M, Alternate Universe.) (KimChay)

Summary: When the Theerapanyakun Mafia tries to take over the remaining cacao farms in Thailand, Kim is pulled from his budding stardom and shoved into an undercover mission; infiltrate the family operated Kittisawat Bakery and find out more about their production and goods.

Unfortunately, no one told Kim that the sweetest thing in the Kittisawat Bakery isn't necessarily the desserts.

🖤 Dirty and Sweet, and You're My Girl. (E, Post-Canon.) (VegasPete)

Summary: Sometimes, Pete wears a skirt. And Vegas is totally fine with it.

🖤 I’ll Ignite For You. (T, Post-Ep 8/Post-Canon.) (KimChay)

Summary: Six months after Porchay finds out the truth and vanishes, Kim is still trying to pick up the pieces of his life. Until at a concert, he sees a familiar face in the crowd.

Amazing People Doing Amazing Things:

LuckyDragon10′s Damn Good KinnPorsche Meta Document: a collection of Tumblr links on Kinnporsche Meta, thoughts, and conversations.

Shouyo-yo’s KinnPorsche Comics: a series of comics developed in conjunction with Of Coffee and Conversations.