#kaz KNOWS he literally stands NO CHANCE against childe

[greedbent]

Kaz Brekker had made a mistake.

To the masses, that was practically impossible. Every move he made was calculated, having long considered all options as meticulously as any skilled swordsman cared for his equipment—making sure everything worked perfectly, accounting for any weaknesses in his armor before diving headfirst into battle . . . That was, after all, how Dirtyhands preferred to be seen. Oftentimes all it took to keep someone well under his thumb was the fear of him always being a hundred steps ahead. They couldn’t so much as wriggle without him knowing and having a retaliation that would hurt so much more—no matter how quick or slow it came.

People thought of Inej as his spider: she could crawl anywhere, get him any information he needed, but at the end of it all . . .

He would always be the one in the middle of the web waiting for his moment to strike. And when he made his mistakes, he mended the tears in that web before anyone could see them. He compensated. He created a new tangle, a new distraction, redirected his enemy’s attention before they ever noticed he’d lost his footing and nearly tumbled through one of the yawning gaps.

Kaz Brekker made mistakes people usually never saw.

Until now. When such a mistake mattered enough that he couldn’t risk making it— But he had.

It was clumsy. Unacceptable. Deserving of more than just a slap on the wrist. Tartaglia caught him off-guard in ways he always did. Kaz never struggled to dig his fingers into someone’s sore spots, never came across anyone who didn’t have at least one to exploit: the one thing that would always get them on their knees if pressed just right. But Tartaglia had never been easy. He was impulsive. He was as feral as a rabid dog, someone who couldn’t be saved and should be put out of his misery (only that he wasn’t in misery at all, but thrived in the chaos). He was an unpredictable whirlwind as much as Kaz attempted to wrangle it, to hone the unpredictability into a predictability. And that was where the mistakes happened.

Kaz couldn’t reason with insanity.

Even the weak points of that chaos were more of a trigger to an explosion than a means of controlling the creature inside; no, if he pushed Tartaglia’s buttons, he wouldn’t get his cooperation. Kaz had his modesty where he needed it; he knew the Harbinger would have no reason not to gut him right here and now if he wasn’t careful.

—and Dirtyhands had plenty of work to do before he was ready to die.

Mentally, Kaz stepped back from that cage. He removed his hands from between the bars where he had been taunting the beast. And his next exhale came tight, hardly much of a relief—as if he’d expelled a mere fraction of the breath now caught and burning in his lungs. As much as he despised this . . . he backed off. (The rabid dog wasn’t his enemy more so than he was an obstacle.)

“Fine,” he said, tone crisp and final. “Then I need you to first start being honest about the job you’re asking of us.” And as much as he despised meeting that icy leer across from him, Kaz still held it unwaveringly. His jaw tightened, but he continued. “The Fatui don’t go sniffing about for random and unassuming valuables like treasure hoarders; some of you are a bit more sophisticated than that.” Some of you was very deliberately directed at the creature sitting here with him. “The artifact in question doesn’t just crumble to dust when it’s dropped. Tell me what’s so special about it and what sort of danger I’m putting my ‘kids’ in.”

It would be a fair assessment to call both men seated at this table ruthless. Truth be told, it was the only reason Childe found his current company at all tolerable to deal with. For at his core, Kaz was just as insufferable as the other Harbingers: always plotting and scheming, more likely to play the long con with everyone he met than simply eliminate problems head-on. From the moment he'd sat down, Childe knew the shrewd stare across from him studied everything. Kaz's (usually) unflinching stoicism was a veil for cogs that never stopped turning.

That was where the two men seated at this table differed.

Childe's sharp gaze did not seek out weakness for the sake of a scheme. When prey exposed its throat, he did not use the opportunity to tie a leash around it to control and exploit at a later time. No, he latched on with his teeth.

The slip in Kaz's composure was only the briefest instant—but that was enough for the ferocity in Childe's blood to target that weak point. Heh, and he hadn't even been trying to earn a rise. How sloppy.

But Childe's (admittedly pointless) veil of civility had its flaws, as well. The less-than-subtle, deliberate taunt in Kaz's "follow-up query" stretched the corners of his grin just a fraction too wide. Teetering on a knife's edge of which Kaz's words tested the sharpness.

"I have no problem with you asking questions that are relevant to the job at hand. However, I don't see how that could possibly be of any concern to you when you stand to profit either way. Besides, I believe I just finished explaining why I'm a poor fit for the job." If he undertook the task himself, there would be blood and destruction...much like what would become of this very tavern if the man across from him didn't tread very carefully.

Shaking his head, Childe tsked as if scolding a literal bearer of his namesake. "Were you even listening to my proposal? And you call yourself a professional." Spreading his hands wide, his gaze once again lazily traversed the room, this time spurred by boredom. "If you have any legitimate questions, you'd better ask them now. Otherwise, this offer has a time limit—as much as I'd love to spend all evening indulging you, I have a few debts to collect before the night is over."

When he leveled the other again, Childe's stare was solid ice: a testament to the ruthlessness at his core. "Unless you'd like to give your wraith the chance to ask her own questions—now that would be worth my time, if the real professional could join us. After all, she's really the one who's services I'd be enlisting." He inclined his chin. Brazen. Inviting retaliation. "Or does everything have to go through Daddy for approval? Can't have your kids making any decisions on their own, now can you?"

[mothsandbutterflies13]

Shadow and Bone Pt 2

The General/The Darkling/Aleksander Morozova: I like this character. Like, a lot. It helps that he's the epitome of "Tall, Dark, and Handsome" (TDH) but Aleksander Morozozva, as a person, is so interesting. There are so many things I'd like to pick his brain on; human nature, court politics, the war with Fjerda and Shu Han, Zlatan and his independence movement, etc. As a character, I wish they had injected some more darkness into him. I get it, the show is supposed to be marketed towards a younger audience, so it's not logical to have your tall, dark heartthrob be a literal jackass with no redeemable points. I applaud the show for giving him a more human side to him, but I also wish they would be clear on which couple is endgame. B/c if Darklina is endgame, I don't think you're doing enough to sell it. And if it's not, then you're doing waaaaay too much to sell it.

Alina Starkov: I love the actress. She seems so funny and kind. Her biracial status is just an added bonus. As a character, though… let's just say, Alina might not be a Mary Sue, but she's not not one either. Let me explain. I can't say I was thrilled to hear Alina Starkov was written as biracial in the show. It just felt like they were trying to score diversity points in being able to cast Jessie Mei Li as the female lead in a major TV production. I mean, in the context of the universe of Shadow and Bone, it was fine. I guess. But we really only get one piece of dialogue wherein Alina is discriminated against by the army camp cook for her different looks (which, if we're talking different looks, Mal looks waaaay more Shu Han than Alina, but that's just my opinion) and the confrontation with the tsarista and the maid's comment about changing her eyes, but that was about it. And Botkin, who looks and sounds like a Shu Han, NEVER comments on her appearance. For some people, that's great, it means he doesn't see her any different than anyone else. However, in a country where Ravkans sometimes openly discriminate against anyone that looks Shu Han (not Fjerdan cuz they look way too similar to their southern neighbors🙄🙄), you'd think Botkin would give Alina some advice or, I don't know, impart some knowledge about their shared cultural heritage!? If you're going to portray a character as a different race than she was (implied) in the books, AND make a big deal out of it, I should think you'd at least TRY and highlight why this change was necessary or important. But, if you're not going to do that, then please don't emphasize that particular fact. Just treat her like you would if she were of Caucasian descent.

And don't give me the same-old speel about representation. As an American-born Chinese, I grew up in a predominantly white town where I only had a few classmates who looked like me. I know what it means to be discriminated against or never seeing someone who looked like me on TV or in movies. I don't like watching the animated Mulan movie because she was a Chinese princess amongst a sea of white princesses. I like her because she doesn't take shit from anyone, not even her commanding officer. However, I identified the most with Belle because we were both bookworms and saw the beauty in the written word.

As for her powers… Like I said above, I really want to see what she could do with them. Light + physics = pretty OP.

Ok, so on to some of my biggest gripes with Alina.

One. She's angry that Aleksander has kept her letters from Mal and Mal's letters from her, leading her to believe that Mal doesn't care about her. As a way to woo the heart of possibly the only girl who'll ever be your equal, definitely not the best move. But as a general in charge of an army of grisha who now has finally found the one person who could make all his wishes come true, a necessary evil. True, Aleksander is half a millennia old, you'd think he'd have learned some patience by now. Alternatively, he could just be stubborn and set in his ways because no one has been able to challenge him and he hasn't had to stop and think about the consequences of his actions in terms of the individuals it will affect in a long time. However, in terms of what he could've done (send Mal on some impossible mission that was 100% going to get him killed) (Ok, yes, so the hunt for Morozova's stag probably should've been that, but we're not here to talk about what-ifs), confiscating their letters to each other was practically not even in the top 100. So, I honestly don't get why she seemed to make a mountain out of a mole hill.

Two. Aleksander didn't disclose that he was the Black Heretic and that he was planning to get the stag to be able to control Alina and her powers. I mean… would youdivulge your deepest, darkest secret to someone you just met not even a week before? Especially when it's about something as big as this. No? Point made. As to his plans for the amplifier, it's not like he could've known what the Sun Summoner was going to be like. And this goes back to my point before, that he can't see the trees for the forest because he's used to thinking in big-picture terms and what's best for the grisha as a whole, not the individual person. If you can't predict what this nebulous person is going to be like, you might as well hold all the control in your hands so as not to leave anything up to chance. Maybe Alina just can't see the forest for the trees.

Three. The above points are why (probably, most likely) why she chose Mal over Aleksander in the finale. Oh my God, I don't even know where to start. First of all, I have it on good authority (from someone who's read the books) that Alina is never Mal's first choice (and for that rant, I suggest you read the next point below before coming back to this one) but she still chooses him. When there's a perfectly good, emotionally-available, TDH man who accepts you, boils and all, standing. RIGHT. THERE. Second, this teaches young girls a bad precedent (granted, book!Darkling was a jackass so maybe not him). Why hang onto a guy who's made it clear to you, through his actions, that he'll never see you as his #1? Why waste your time, money, affections for someone like him? He doesn't deserve it and he CERTAINLY doesn't deserve you! You should only be with someone who treats you like a princess, who makes it clear to you that you have been, are, and always will be his #1. (I'm assuming the other person is male, but you don't have to read it like that. Don't @ me.) Trust me, Zhi Hua chasing after Yong Qi in HZIII scared me enough as a child and I have no desire to go through something like that in real life.

Mal: "This is why I have such a problem with Malina as endgame! If they were endgame, why is Mal always treating her like a second choice and Alina always content with the scraps he throws at her?! At least, with Aleksander, Alina was, is, and always will be his first choice and he makes it ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY clear he thinks the world of her! I thought Aleksander was the kind of guy we were taught to grab and hold on to, not some childhood bestie who always puts you on the backburner!" That's all I have to say for this one.

Zoya: I would have liked to see some complexity in this character, other than the whole "unrequited love for the Darkling". Granted, I only saw a quarter of the show, so I don't know about later episodes.

As for the Crows, I wish I had seen more complexity and character backstory from Kaz. Jesper is amazing but, my favorite has to be Inej because she's fulfilling all my Assassin dreams!

My sister claims I'm expecting too much out of a TV show that is based on a YA fantasy novel series, and maybe I am. I just want to see a well-made fantasy TV series or movie with a great cast that has amazing acting chops, beautiful set pieces, intricate costuming, and a well-written plotline with a dash of sarcasm and wit. Is that really so hard to ask for?

[libralita]

Title: The Scrivener’s Bones

Author: Brandon Sanderson

Illustrations: Hayley Lazo

Summary: In this second Alcatraz adventure, Alcatraz finds himself on a mission to meet Grandpa Smedry when he gets swept up by a flying glass dragon filled with his unusual and mouthy Smedry cohorts.

Their mission? A dangerous, library-filled one, of course!

They are on their way to the ancient and mysterious Library of Alexandria (which some silly people think was long ago destroyed!) where they must find Grandpa Smedry, look for clues leading to Alcatraz's potentially undead dead father, and battle the creepy, dangerous soul-sucking curators who await them.

Rating: ★★★★★

Review:

This book we got new characters and go to the Library of Alexandria to try and find Grandpa Smedry and maybe someone else…It wasn’t as…batshit crazy as the first one. Perhaps because I’m used to the weirdness or Sanderson toned to down for…y’know plot. However, I still enjoyed it!

“Dangerous, but unseen. (Kind of like those troublemakers who read fantasy novels.)”—Page 16

Yeah…Hey wait a minute!

“There was a pause. A dreadful, terrible, long annoying, frustrating, deadly, nerve-racking, incredibly wordy pause.”—Page 27

We get it!

“It’s because of people like you that we authors have to clog our second books with all kinds of explanations. We have to, essentially, invent the wheel again—or at least renew our patent.”—Page 35

Recaps are annoying.

“That was intended to teach you something: that I’m completely trustworthy and would never dare lie to you. At least not more than, oh, half a dozen times per chapter.”—Page 35

Ah, I love you, Alcatraz.

Sing has a sister named Australia and she looked like Katara. She was an okay character, she reminded me of the girl we meet in the Reckoners book. Mizzy, I think. She didn’t really do much but her talent is hilarious.

“‘Of course I will,’ Draulin said. ‘As the oldest child of Attica Smedry, you are the heir to the pure Smedry line. You outrank both your cousin and your uncle, which means you are in command of this vessel.’”—Page 57

Why, Draulin? Why on earth would you say that to a stupid, thirteen-year-old? This is really your own fault. I don’t know how to feel about Draulin. While she was did some really freaking badass things…she was kind of just stereotypical military mom. Maybe she’ll get more development later.

“Don’t even get my started on the economic value of belly button lint.”—Page 65

Oh my god.

“‘She’s…standing on top of Dragonaut,’ I said as I watched through the glass. ‘Yes,’ Bastille said. ‘We appear to be going several hundred miles an hour.’ ‘About that.’ ‘She’s blocking laser beams fired by a jet airplane.’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Using nothing but her sword.’”—Page 75

This was truly amazing and laws of physics be damned.

“‘What if you feel like you’re dead?’ Bastille asked, pulling herself free from her jacket. ‘Raise a finger, then,’ Kaz said, walking down the beach towards us. I won’t say which one she raised.”—Page 96

How rude.

“You have to remember, however, that this is not fiction, but a real-life account. I can’t help it if all of my friends were too selfish to do the narratively proper thing and get themselves killed off to hike up the tension of my memoirs. I’ve spoken to them at length about this. If it makes you feel better, Bastille dies by the end of this book. Oh, you didn’t want to hear that? I’m sorry. You’ll simply have to forget that I wrote it. There are several convenient ways to do that. I hear hitting yourself on the head with a blunt object can be very effective. You should try using one of Brandon Sanderson’s fantasy novels. They’re big enough, and goodness knows that’s really the only useful thing to do with them.”—Page 101

Oh, I’m sure Bastille will die in book two of a Middle Grade series. Alcatraz also has a bridge on the moon to sell you. Also the crack at Brandon’s own books is perfection.

“Adults are not idiots. Often, in books such as this one, the opposite impression is given. Adults in those stories will either (a) get captured, (b) disappear conspicuously when there is trouble, or (c) refuse to help. (I’m not sure what authors have against adults, but everyone seems to hate them to extent usually reserved for dogs and mothers. Why else make them out to be such idiots? ‘Ah look, the dark lord of evil has come to attack the castle! Annnnnd there’s my lunch break. Have fun saving the world on your own, kids!’)”—Page 106

THANK YOU! I hate this trope so much.

I feel like as a tall person, I should be offended by Kaz’s list.

“I am a fish. No, really. I am. I have fins, a tail, scales. I swim about, doing fishy things. This isn’t a metaphor or a joke, but a real and honest fact. I am a fish. More on this later.”—Page 119

I…okay.

So you can sacrifice an Oculator and anyone can use the Lenses. Sounds like Mistborn.

“So that’s why I’m writing my autobiography. I want to teach you to ignore the fish and pay attention to the shoes. Fish and shoes. Remember that.”—Page 137

Okay, then.

“P.S. If that crazy son of mine Kazan is there, smack him on the head for me.”—Page 145

I miss Grandpa Smedry. Speaking of Kaz, I think he was my favorite of the new characters. His powers were super cool and he delivered a message about being different which was nice.

“I shivered, realizing it probably wasn’t a good idea to sass the soul-sucking monsters with a burning skull for a head.”—Page 159

Probably not.

If the Library of Alexandria has future books then I’m totally selling my soul in order to read the entire Cosmere. It’d be totally worth it.

“People don’t read anymore. And when they do, they don’t read books like this one, but instead read books that depress them, because those books are seen as important.”—Page 172

Who would ever read a book that would depress them?

“Your father and I have very similar Talents—I can get lost and Attica can loose things—and both are flexible.”—Page 178

Fletcher lost her keys.

“‘From this day on,’ he whispered, raising the bazooka, ‘I shall be known as Hambo.’”—Page 186

Brandon. Corner. Now.

Ah, so that’s why Fletcher lost her keys. Wait so if two people with Talents got married would they get each other’s Talents, now having two Talents? Or would they just their own Talents?

“Given the chance, and I’d probably cut my wedding cake with one.”—Page 210

*Does a quick Google search* Brandon, did in fact cut his wedding cake with a sword. Also I found this amazing page. Seriously click it. Like holy shit he has a bunch of swords at his wedding. That’s beautiful.

“Or you could be a serial killer who specializes in reading books, then seeking out the authors and murdering them in horrible ways. (If you happen to fall into that last category, you should know that my name isn’t really Alcatraz Smedry, not is it Brandon Sanderson. My name is in fact Garth Nix, and you can find me in Australia. Oh, and I insulted your mother once. What’re you going to do about it, huh?)”—Page 214

What did Garth Nix ever to do to Brandon?

I love that Alcatraz is just stealing gold. It’s always the trope that you can’t ever take the riches but Alcatraz does it. I love how Brandon subverts tropes.

“Rocky Mountain oysters!”—Kaz, Page 256

Do you know what’s those are? They’re not oysters…

“You remember the secret ‘thing’ I claimed to have done in this book? The shameful, clever trick? Did you go looking for it? Well, whatever you found, that wasn’t what I was intending—because there is no trick. No hidden message. No clever twist I put into the first fourteen chapters.”—Page 258

I HATE YOU AND LOVE YOU SANDERSON!

“(Hey, kids? Want a taste of Dickens? It’s awesome, man. Come on. First chapters of Hard Times are free. I know you’ll be back for A Tale of Two Cities later.)”—Page 264

Why did you have to pick Dickens and Hard Times? I can’t tell if that was a dick joke or not.

I can’t believe it, Attica actually sold his soul for information…but wait, there’s still that writing on the wall. Go back to the writing on the wall.

“‘Oh, dear,’ Grandpa Smedry said, smiling. ‘We’ll never shut him up now. He’s gone and come back from the dead.’”—Page 322

My mouth literally dropped open. First because I couldn’t believe that it only took us two books to get Alcatraz’s dad back. Great subversion of the tropes. Also he pulled a Kelsier. Oh my God Attica and Kelsier need to meet. I WANT A CROSSOVER NOW.

Oh, man Bastille’s death scene was really a tear-jerk.