#kang taehyun aus

[hyukascampfire]

𝓖INGER & 𝓢NAP ` ꕀ. k.th

you were the last person taehyun expected to appear on his doorstep. sweet and fluffy and oh-so-proper; he never thought he’d see you again. but... there you stand. and, much to his own chagrin, he fears that nobody else could get him more bothered. ׄ ⋆ ִ

་༘ ՚՚ ꒰ 🪵 ꒱ ･ 7.9k

ρairings gingerbread!taehyun x frosty puff!reader

𝒢 ‧̥ smut, fantasy, strawberry shortcake au

⍵arnings brat taming, brat tamer!taehyun & brat!reader, his cum is frosting, creampie, ofc no sex ed in strawberryland, thigh riding, oral m!receiving, cumming into mouth, cum eating, corruption of innocence & innocent!reader, banter, chubby!reader and buff!taehyun, manhandling, he throws her around a bit and she's so into it, they don't like each other but also def do, he likes to teach her manners, reader is also spoiled & rich and taehyun is not, hair pulling, he gets mean, no protectiom, let me know if i missed some!

✎୭ ashlynn's note this collab has been seriously so fun. writing fics is fun, but there's something about talking your friends and scheming all the yummy ways you can incorporate certain things into your fic. @thetxtdevil mae baby, thank you so much for being the best and even coming up with this idea. your mind amazes me... like actually. everybody did so unbelievably good, and i'm blessed to have been a part of it. now... let's get foody and smutty lol. some of this was written in a benadryl haze, but that's the fun part. i'm sorry mine came out a lil later than everybody else's, but hopefully it's still fun!

... back to the masterlist ⌇ back to strawberryland

Raising your fist to the door, your knuckles rap against it with a few thick knocks. The door is frosted around the edges in little swirling white puffs of icing, framing the gingerbread door. It’s the same all around his house: gumdrops and candy canes and the like, all twinkling with sugar crystals.

It’s all so sweet—unbelievably so. The man that calls it home is the very antithesis of sweet. He does not take after the gumdrop, nor the sweetness of the icing, and most definitely not the brown sugar and molasses of the gingerbread. Taehyun is the quick snapping of a leg, or the sharpness on your tongue when you get to the cinnamon and nutmeg. 

You loathe it. Even being stood here, knocking at his door, you hate. He is everything uncouth and abrasive—he is everything you should not entertain. 

Here you are, entertaining it. The door swings open. Your fingers and toes have begun to slow with the cold, like frosty-whip in the fridge. Through the forest, stepping over sugar bushes and cocoa streams, you had fought the bite. Why did he have to live all the way out here? Secluded, as though the rest of Strawberryland were beneath his meddling. You know why: it’s that he believes it. He is exactly as your parents told you he’d be, all those years ago. Of course, they were right. They always are.

When he catches sight of you at his door, his distant eyes morph, and his lip tugs into a scowl. The rise of his brows ruffles your feathers with an infuriating ease. “Is there something you want?” he asks. His tone is infuriating, too. It’s the kind of question that means much more beyond the words said. You catch exactly what he means—how he intends to get under your skin.

Hidden behind the door, he has one hand on the handle. It's an unspoken thing, too. He wants you to remember that he could close it. You can’t let him, or else you’ll have drug your pretty new furry winter boots through the powdered snow for him to slam a door in your face. “Yeah, actually. There is.” You run preening fingers through the ends of your hair. “We’re partners for the bake-off.”

“I don’t do the bake-off,” he says. His eyes would be chocolate and smooth if it weren’t for the way he wields them sharp. “Sorry. You’re gonna have to find somebody more your speed for that.”

Barking an incredulous, perhaps even snobby, laugh, you look around. Snow comes down on the ground, sweet and creamy. It’d been enough of a battle to come here. If you were going to give up so easily, you would’ve turned your little bottom around perhaps two hours ago. Does he think you hadn’t considered that? It was a long walk; you had plenty of time to mull over the many things he might do. Sometimes, you imagined him diplomatic and affable. You stomped those wispy thoughts out. Perhaps it’s been years since you’ve spoken with him, and perhaps what happened between the two of you is dusted over, but you know better. Here he stands in front of you: bitter as ever. 

“You’re just gonna leave me without a partner?” you say. Your jaw trembles, seized finally by the cold. “Everybody is already paired up. Literally everybody.”

Shrugging, he says, “I don’t see how that’s my problem. I didn’t sign up for it.”

Your brows knit. That means somebody else had signed him up. You have a sneaking suspicion who might’ve—Blueberry Kai always tells you that he just feels excluded. It’s hard not to laugh when he does. Taehyun? Excluded?  He is exactly where he wants to be. Where most are sweet in Strawberryland, the snappy gingerbread finds it easier to justify his bitterness when he lives off in his little gingerbread home, out and away in his own neck of the forest only to be found by a winding gumdrop road, where he can pretend he’s above it all.

It’s entirely ironic. Him, better than you? Gingerbread, and all his ruggedness? His unpolished edges? Once, you’d believed that the two of you weren’t so different. That you could be friends, even. Seeing what he’s grown to be, you think you understand why your parents stepped in. Back then, though, as just that soft little girl who followed the charismatic boy around with crystal stars in your eyes, it had been the worst thing to ever happen to you. He had been so gravity-defying, moving through the soft, marshmallow edges and the sugar-whipped reality of Strawberryland as something different.

No. Not gravity-defying. Rather, in the powdery and sweet sweet Strawberryland, you think that he is the only thing with gravity.

“That’s not fair.”

“Not fair?” he echoes, letting a little patronizing laugh out along with it. “That’s sweet.”

It’s hard not to shift or cross your arms over your chest, abraded by the dripping sneer.

“What? It’s not. It’s not fair that, just because you don’t want to at least give it a try, I can’t participate,” you say. Really, you should just crawl back home and beg to join somebody’s duo, but you can’t lose like that. You can’t lose to him. If you leave it like this, then he’ll have gotten the better of you. 

“Can’t get everything we want, huh?” he says, straightening up and taking the door in his hand once more. “Just because everybody else has bent backward to give you what you want doesn’t mean that I will.”

“Wait,” you say, sighing in a white swirl. “Don’t close the door. Don’t you know your manners? It’s rude. You’re just going to let me freeze out here? I walked all the way out here, and even got snow all over my new boots, just for this, just for you to slam a door in my face? I mean, a gentleman would at least invite me in to warm me up.”

Lips twitching into a laugh and his eyes suddenly alight, he says, “A gentleman, huh?” He pulls the door open a little further. The warmth from his home, warm and spiced and oh-so-inviting like oven-warmed gingerbread, brushes over your twinkling skin. “Sure. Show me your manners, then. I want you to ask me nicely.”

Your jaw tightens. Sending him a once over, sharpening your eyes, you decide to just do it. His tone is nasty, but you don’t want to be disqualified for not having a partner. Even if he’s the worst you could’ve been paired with in all of Strawberryland. Or maybe the best, because it’s a gingerbread house competition this year. “Will you just do it?”

“I said ask nicely. Say please.” 

He wears a mean smile—he’s having fun watching you squirm. So, you make a conscious effort to straighten up. “Will you please be my partner for the competition?” you say, making your voice sugary and batting your eyelashes in an overdone way. He thinks he’s funny.

Stepping out of the doorway, he motions you inside. It might look gentlemanly if it weren't for the sting in his eyes. You swallow down petty words and push through, your arms full with supplies. Arms aching, you finally let them clatter down over the countertop. The inside of his home is fresh-baked and spiced, aromatic like a true gingerbread cookie straight from the oven. You’re sure the glowing fire helps carry the smell in warm air. It wraps your cold bones up and smooths over some of the frayed edges. You’d been out there for so long… Nobody else had to walk that far for their partner.

Better just to get this done as quickly as you can. You just have to put up with him today, and you’ll be done, and then you can have fun with the competition. He won’t even show up for it; you’re sure. 

“I’ll do it all if it’s that big of a deal,” you tell him, laying out the walls and warming the icing between your palms. “You can put the peppermint on, I guess. So then we can say we both worked on it.”

Hair the fluffy brown of true gingerbread and dusted with snowflakes like powdered sugar. Taehyun shakes his head, and it moves with him. “No,” he says, the corners of his lips still turned up as though he knows something you don’t. He rolls the sleeves of his gaudy, knitted Christmas sweater up to his elbows. The corded muscle there, flickering with movement, catches you off guard. Gingerbread, built like that? Tearing your eyes off him with the effort of metal tearing itself from a magnet, you watch him approach the kitchen counters. “I’ll help. We’re partners, right?”

No matter what he says, there’s a twist of something sparkling in those sharp eyes that has you watching him closer—has you trying to gauge exactly what he’s playing at. “Uh… Yeah. Sure. If you want to, I guess.” You gesture at the walls. “Two for us, and ten for display. Can you start the walls?”

“Ten?” he says. “We’re making twelve gingerbread houses?”

With your lips pulled taut, you say, “Yeah… Twelve. Is that too much? I didn’t think any amount of gingerbread houses would be too much for you. That’s a little ironic.” Everything is warm in his home—even when you look down at your own hands to tug off your white woolen gloves, your skin that usually sparkles like frost rests just beneath the surface is tinged with the warmth.

“I can handle it just fine,” he says, taking the wall and base sections of one. “Just wouldn’t want you to ruin your pretty outfit. Twelve is a lot of icing.” He spits the word pretty out like it tastes bad. On his tongue, you’re sure it does. He never cared for pretty things the way you do. Your mommy always said that he was just jealous, but when the both of you were little, before your parents’ meddling, you learned that it was just a different lifestyle. One that you don’t understand, perhaps. Who doesn’t enjoy dressing themselves in lush furs and sugar crystals over their necks? 

“I’ll be fine,” you say, snipping the tip of the piping bag open. “I wore these knowing they’d get dirty. They’re my baking clothes. My boots already got all messed up…” 

“Oh,” he says. “You put on cashmere knowing you’ll get it dirty. Mommy and daddy paid a pretty penny for that, huh? And it’s your throwaway outfit?”

“Look. If you like it so much, I’ll let you have it when we’re done, yeah? Maybe you’ll make a pretty penny off selling it.” You ice a warm white line down the length of a wall. “Can you hurry? I’m already icing. I don’t want to be here all day.”

There’s  a few long, thrumming moments of quiet, where only the sound of your piping back crackling fills his home. Finishing a wall, you tear yourself away from your work to spare a glance his way.

Taehyun’s jaw is tight, a muscle flickering where he grits his jaw in the low light that washes over him. There’s a fire blazing in his eyes, and though he doesn’t turn them on you, the smoke rolling from them is enough to make your skin warm. You’d successfully gotten under his skin. Why stop here, when seeing that look on his face is so fun? He looks as sour as an apple; as spiced as cinnamon. “Wall?” you say, sharp and haughty as you offer your hand out to him in an impatient demand.

Snapping his head up, he hands you a wall with the heat of a thousand ovens in his face. You feel the scald he intends for you with it, and you revel in it.

You bark commands at him, watching his shoulders grow tense and his lips twitch with each. Crush the candy canes, you tell him. Melt the icing. Sprinkle these over that. Soon enough, you’re sitting back and watching him work more than anything.

He doesn’t say a word. You see them brimming in his eyes, but he doesn’t let them burst out all venomous like you know he wants to. It’s quite the show. 

“Would you at least help me hold this up?” he says, holding the walls of a house together with one hand. His hands are a mess of runny sugar and powdered sugar for snow, and yours are perfectly clean. You can at least help a little bit if you want to claim any part in the competition. 

You reach for the piping bag, fat with the sweet sweet icing, and straighten a wall up. You trace the seams with it, thick and like glue. With a bit too much pressure, the side of the bag bursts. White rivulets of slow icing run down your fingers and over the table. You curse, dropping it to the counter. That’s all of your icing, flopped down and deflating over the surface all sad-like. It’d been so much, that you thought it would last you each house and then some. Of course, you hadn’t brought extra.

Bringing your sticky fingers up to your mouth, you suckle the mess off. It’s so very sweet—warm and weeping, nutty and spiced with something like nutmeg. It’s Taehyun: the smell of it, the way it spreads over your tongue… You stick your tongue out to catch it where some drips down your forearm. “Mmm,” you say, sticky-armed. “Tastes good.” That’ll be good on the gingerbread houses; maybe the two of you do have a chance at winning. 

When you look up to Taehyun, he stands frozen in place, his hands still holding up a half-constructed gingerbread house. His eyes are different. It’s a look you don’t recognize—a look you’ve never seen before. Rather than deep and warm, his eyes are blackish and heavy. A swallow goes down his throat; a tense, barely contained thing.

 You frown, your lips still a sugary mess. “I didn’t mean to make a mess. Sorry. I’ll clean it up…”

Clearing his throat, Taehyun says, “Yeah…”

He watches you clean the counters, where the icing had pooled, and now the bag is empty, with the same intensity. You can feel it on your skin in a foreign, itching way. You swipe and scoop and work at the spill, and still, he watches. He does not speak. 

You survey the houses you’ve managed to finish. They’re pretty, and absolutely competition ready: looping swirls of icing like shingles on the roofs, peppermint chunks all red and white catching light where you’d sprinkled them into the frosting, gumdrops lining the paths true to Taehyun’s own home, and powdered sugar sifted over the entirety of it like snowfall. It’s all great, but there are only four.  “What are we supposed to do now?” you say, lips pouty. “That’s all the icing I brought. We literally can’t make any more.” You wipe at a smear on your cheek. How’d that get there? “I think I’m gonna have to come back tomorrow… Can you hold on to the houses for me?”

“Yeah—yeah, sure. Tomorrow,” he says, blinking something away. He straightens. “It’s a long walk. I think you should get going.”

You want to say something snarky or ask him why he wants you out of the house so fast, but it’s true. Night’s creeping over Strawberryland, and you have no icing, and tomorrow’s the last day before the bake-off. If the two of you don’t work harder tomorrow than you did today, then you won’t even make qualifications. You’ll lose before even starting.

You never lose. Not like this, and certainly not to the man standing before you. 

ꕀ

“C’mon. You can do better than that, can’t you?” Taehyun says, drooping icing from rooftops like icicles as you sprinkle crushed candies over the top. 

You grit your teeth. If he’d been snappy yesterday, he’s made it his mission to be your worst nightmare today. You think it’s his sort of revenge for ordering him around how you did. “What would you like, then?” you say. Maybe it’s feeding right into what he wants, but your life has lent you a short fuse. “You don’t even care about winning. Why does it matter? Let me do it how I want.”

He’s in another sweater. The sleeves are bunched up to the elbow just like yesterday, but you think he’s making a point with it this time. The shifting of his muscles is a bit too intense for piping icing. You’d made it through three more houses, wrangling your inner demons with each passing snide remark or nasty smile the whole time. It doesn’t help that he keeps his home terribly toasty, and you run cold down to the core. You melt and melt until all that is left of your temper is a puddle on the floor beneath you. Gone. 

“We’re partners, remember?” he says. He doesn’t even look at you as he says it. “I don’t do things half-assed, Frosty.” 

You’re sent reeling with the old nickname. It’d been sweet then, back when it was just the two of you against the world, but now it’s gone sour like milk. It even comes from his mouth soured. It’s something that you thought you’d left a million lifetimes ago, never to hear again. With Taehyun, though, it’s hard to pretend that you are no longer that. 

He will not let you forget that, at one point, the two of you were friends. An unlikely pair, especially looking at you now. You thought it was all nothing to you, but seeing him has kicked up dust. 

“You don’t?” you say, shooting him a quick glare from the side of your eye. “That’s funny.”

Strong brows shooting up, Taehyun quits mid-piping to look at you. “Funny? What’s funny about it to you?”

You can’t settle the obnoxious smile that curls at the edges of your mouth, mean and taunting and falsely sweet. “Oh, nothing.” You shake a sifter full of powder against your palm. It falls like true snow down over the house. 

“No, tell me,” he says, his eyes trained and heavy on your dismissive shrug. “Tell me what you think of me. I wanna hear it.”

Oh, this will be good.

“It’s just that,” you say, “you’re not really known for doing things the best way, you know? Living all the way out here, an ass when anybody tries to talk to you… Well, really, it’s just that nobody likes you. But, don’t worry! I’m sure there’s at least somebody that does.”

His face falls, the twinkle of delight at taunting you that he’d been holding in his eyes gone away. All that’s left is the peaking of something deeper and roiling from out of the cracks. You get the funny feeling that maybe you’ve taken it a step too far.

But, you never lose.

“Is that what it is?” he says. “I work for my shit. You? Everything you’ve ever had has been handed to you.” He measures his words delicately. Like a measuring cup full over the top, he cuts the excess words and coarseness off. He doesn’t say all that he thinks, but you see all he leaves unsaid toiling furiously behind his eyes. 

His eyes. They’re clear and, sharp as they are, they pin you. It’s a reflection of that look he gave you yesterday: deep and swirling and wild. It’s more than that, this time, though. It’s laced with anger and bursting at the seams of him. You’re not sure he’ll be able to hold back whatever it is that storms just beneath his skin, this time.

“It is,” you say, punctuation your words concisely. “It’s exactly why my parents said I shouldn’t hang out with you. They said that I’m above… all this.”

Oh, you’ve absolutely taken it too far now. You don’t really mean it. Sure, that’s what they told you, but you don’t really believe it. For some time, you did, but not now. It’s too late for sorries, though. Taehyun’s jaw goes tense.

For a long, awful moment, you just stand there and burn in his silence. It’s worse than any words he might spit. It’s hot—hot, hot, hot, and you turn liquid in it.

In a blink, nothing more, you collide against his countertop. Something clatters and thuds behind you. The gingerbread houses? That doesn’t matter right now—all that your dizzy mind can manage is his body crushing you and his fingers biting into the plush of your cheeks.

Where he had fractured, like true gingerbread, he snaps. You can see it in his eyes; even you know when you’ve pushed too far. Perhaps you ought to have seen this coming.

His knuckles curl white around the edge of the counter beside you, and his fingers dig deeper into your face. He’s oh-so-hot up against you. “I’m sick of your fucking mouth,” he snarls. His breath is hot as it fans over your face, too. “Someone needs to put you in your place. Where are your goddamn manners?”

Your heart thrums in your chest, and your pulse goes wild in your neck. You can’t form the words to answer him.

“Quiet now, huh?” he says. The husk in it makes the place between your thighs feel weird. You don’t know what’s wrong with you.

He shut you up real quick. You’ll give him that.

That funny feeling does flips, roaring to life when his fingers hook under the waistband of your bottoms. “That’s your problem.” His eyes send a chill up and down your spine. “You’ve never been told no. You’ve always gotten what you wanted.” Peeling down all the layers, he tugs your knitted stockings and your little fur skirt, and your sweet frosty panties, too. They bunch at your feet. Between your thighs, right where those foreign, throbbing waves reign, cool air laps at a wetness there. The hair all over your body rises. You’ve never felt anything like it. “Not with me. I'll set you straight. I don’t put up with spoiled brats.”

“I’m not a brat,” you say. “You’re just an ass.” They’re the first words that come to you. Damn your temper.

With the same hand he’d been holding your face in place with, he curls his fingers right into your scalp and yanks hard, baring your neck to him. You lose a strained squeak, tears pricking the corners of your eyes at the sting. If your heart had been racing before, it runs wild, now. You strain your eyes to look at him and his curled lips. Painted with a sneer, he says, “Watch your mouth.”

A swallow goes down your throat hard. It’s all unfamiliar: the aching between your thighs, the burning in your blood, and the dazing of your thoughts. “Taehyun, I… I feel weird. It feels weird.”

Something knowing passes over him. “Yeah?” he says. “Show me where. I can help.”

Show him? You hesitate, searching his eyes for an ounce of joke or aversion. You find none, and that pounding is syrupy-sweet, and he says he can help. That’s all you want; all you need. Taking a trembling hand, you bring it down your body, running the palm down the planes of your belly and resting it just over the spot where the lower bit gives way to the apex of your thighs. Going any further—the thought tightens your throat and pinkens your cheeks the color of strawberry frosting. “There. It feels weird there.”

Taehyun smiles a snappy, spiced smile. He likes that. “Want me to make it feel better?”

Your thoughts feel replaced by something powdery and weightless. You give him a dumb nod.

“Say please.”

Something bratty crawls up your throat, but you want help, and he’s the one who will give it to you. He’d meant that: teaching you a lesson. Melted around the edges already, you say, “Please, help make it feel better.” Your voice wavers.

“There we go. That’s how good girls talk. That’s how you ask to get what you want.” He nudges your thighs apart with a knee and slots it between them, pressed right up against that coolness. Right up against that need. “Grind down on it.”

Neck aching at the angle, you say, “Grind?”

He brushes his clothed thigh right up against you. The friction is delicious—sweet and melty and just what you need. It shoots yellow sparks throughout you.

It feels so good. Your mouth waters in anticipation.

“Grind,” he says. It’s harder, this time. Not a sweet suggestion.

You bring yourself back down on it, gasping at the contact, and you do. You grind, tummy tightening at every brush of the fabric hard and delicious. Your chest constricts, one hand flying up to dig your fingers into his shoulder and the other fighting the hand he has still in your hair. It aches and hurts, and so does the friction as you grow more gaspy and frantic. 

It feels so, so good. You want more—you want him to touch you there and everywhere else. He smells just right all over you, nutty and musky like a gingerbread twist. “Taeh—hyun,” you mewl. It burns, but something slick eases the burn a little bit. Just enough for you to enjoy that burn.

“That’s it,” he coos. It’s not a sweet coo; it’s the type of sound one might make when you play right into their mean game. It’s mean. “Make yourself a mess on my thigh. I don’t even have to touch you. What would mommy and daddy think of you now, huh? What would they think if they saw their precious princess fucking herself on my thigh?”

No. That would be the end of you. You whine, thighs twitching. Something twists in your center, scary and foreboding, and still you chase it. None of your thoughts are solid enough to stop. Each time he flexes a muscled thigh or presses it harder into you, you shudder and curl your fingers into his shirt harder. 

“Don’t like that, huh?” he laughs. “Then you haven’t learned your lesson. You’re no better than me; I mean, look at you.”

You want to cry when he pins your hips back to the counter, stilling your wild bucking. Squeezing your eyes shut, you claw and reach for that wave, even as it recedes from you. “Why?” you say, voice thin. It’d been so yummy—the sweetness still rests on your tongue. Your heart thumps hard, longing for it.

“I said, look at yourself,” he growls, taking his hold on your hair to crank your head down.

Right where you’d been on his thigh, there’s a sticky, marshmallowy mess. Your mess. 

Taehyun releasing his grip on your hair is almost a relief, but he doesn’t even give you time to relish it. The walls of his house blur around you. All that you register in between the motions is his shoulder in your belly and your limbs dangling from you. You dig your hands into his back to balance yourself, but he’s got you.

He has you slung over his shoulder. He’s carrying you like you weigh nothing at all. That place between your thighs flutters anew. In all your life, you never worried too much about the plushness of your belly or your thighs. It is who you are; all mallow and soft around the edges and starkly sweet. But you did get nervous when somebody tried picking you up. Usually, you protest and giggle it off. Watching somebody strain to pick you up when they lift other girls like sacks of flour is just something that makes you feel a little strange.

But, Taehyun does not strain. He doesn’t huff; he carries you right down the hallway and into his room, and he even manhandles you down onto the bed with a bounce without so much as a sound. He is a solid pillar beneath you, and then he is a solid, muscled chest above you. With strong fingers, he pins your hands to the mattress above you. With the other, he leads your shirt up.

He’s so warm against your cold skin. His breath like waves from the oven over your mouth, he says, “You think you’re so much better than me because you have all this?” Curling his fingers around a necklace circling your throat, he tears it off with a clattering of a few snow-drop beads.

 You gasp, glaring right into his eyes. “What the hell?” you hiss, arching your chest to wiggle beneath him. Your necklace. Who does he think he is, breaking your stuff? That was one of your favorite necklaces, and now it lies all over his floor. Still, your center pounds and longs for the return of his touch. Everything about him just calls for more from you. You don’t know how you went so long without him, or how you made yourself forget just how drawn you are to his magnetism. Maybe he is just what your parents turn their nose up at, and you too, but that does not make him any less a powerful personality. 

He knows exactly who he is and what he wants, as solid as the gingerbread cookie. And you, plush and impressionable as whipped marshmallows, take to him just right. It’s something you once knew, but the sneered words of adults obscured that memory.

“Don’t whine,” he says. “I want to see your pretty neck without all that shit. That’s your problem: you’re spoiled.” He reaches down to mess with his pants.

His length springs free. Cheeks flushing, you take it in. You can’t look away, even as embarrassment crawls spindly legs over your skin at the interest you take in the sight. You’ve never seen anything like it—long and hot and weeping something thick and white from the slit at the pinkish tip. A pearl of it dribbles down, landing on your belly in a string where he holds it.

Taehyun collects that wetness and then urges more from the tip with a few drags down the length of it. Wrapping his fingers around it, he begins to slowly work his fist up and down it. It’s nothing short of impossible to tear your sights off it—it’s another thing that inexplicably fans the flames of something roaring in your center. “Do you want to touch it?” he says, watching your tongue dart out to wet your lips. 

The sight of him growing restless over his pumping fist is enough to get you nodding. 

“Fuck,” he says, sharp and under his breath. He lets his hand off it. “Go ahead. Touch it. I won’t tell anybody you did.”

When he frees your pinned wrists, you reach out a slow hand. You curl your fingers around it the way he had. Your fingers don’t even touch around jt. The weight and warmth of him in your palm makes your blood tingle. Looking up, you search for guidance in those intelligent, swirling eyes. His bangs hang over his eyes as he watches.

Placing his hand over yours, he drags it up and down his rigid length the way he had been doing a few beats ago. “Like that,” he says. “Just like that.”

You pump your closed fist up and down him, encouraged to squeeze harder and flick your wrist faster with each tight breath he lets slip. The skin of your palm gets stickier and stickier, the slick sounds sending your ears and core burning just the same. You like that it makes him feel good—that he’s making those noises just for you. 

He twitches under your fingers. “Feels just like I thought your pretty hands would…” he says, stomach tight. “See—what happens when you give up that bratty fucking act? Shit… harder—give it to me harder, Frosty…” Shivering at the name, you oblige him. You reach your thumb up and collect more of that beaded liquid from the slit, and you work your arm harder. Faster. Your forearm begins to burn, but you don’t let it slow you. All you want is more of this; more of him. Finally, he lets sounds out from his chest freely. He grunts and hisses through his teeth, letting his head fall back. “Holy shit. I’m gonna—gonna ice your face, okay?” he says. “You said you liked the taste, huh? Wanna taste it again? Give me your tongue…”

Whatever that means, you push yourself up and situate your face in front of his length, your tongue out. Taehyun’s sounds tighten, and his hips begin to stutter and chase your hand. He picks his head back up to look down at you half-lidded—to watch. With only a few last runs of your palm down his length, skin so slick that your hand just slips and slides up him, he growls through gritted teeth. The weight of him in your working hand twitches once more, and from that weeping tip he shoots dancing ribbons of white. It lands on your tongue hot and sweet, melting out all spiced and snappy.

Snappy like gingerbread. Like gingerbread icing. Swallowing it down, you meet his gaze. He pants, chest rising and falling, but there’s something clear and knowing in his heavy eyes when you do. You think you know now, why he’d been so dazed as you made a show of licking that same sticky icing off your hands and said how good it tasted. 

When you release him from your palm, it glistens with his sweet essence. He softens in front of your eyes just the littlest bit.

Eyes just as hungry and still catching his breath, Taehyun says, “Open your mouth. I wanna see your tongue.”

Belly doing wicked twists, you do. You stick your tongue out for him, still laden with the headiness of his taste. He does taste good. 

“Swallowed it all down?” he says, eating the sight of you with your mouth dropped open up. “You really are so nasty. They all think you’re so sweet—you think you’ve got them all wrapped around your finger.” He pushes you back down to the bed with a palm. “Well, not me. I know that you’re just as filthy as you are spoiled. Somebody had to deal with you.”

Like always, snarky words swirl in your mouth. All it would take is letting them fall off your tongue. But you don’t—not with the feeling between your thighs, and not with the way your blood, frost turned to snowmelt, begs for him to fix it. Not when you know that all it will get you is more of Taehyun’s wrath. 

It’s not like what he says is true, or anything. That’s what you tell yourself anyway.

“Taehyun, please. I need it…” He takes a marshmallow thigh of yours, pressing it up so that it melds with your belly. Cool air reminds you once more of that strange wetness between them.

Dark, blown eyes catching the sight of it, his lips quirk into a scoff. “Need what?” he says, reaching a hand down. At the contact of his fingers, just as they had against his thigh, your hips jolt and an explosion like the breaking of sugar glass shoots down the muscles of your thighs. He scoops that stickiness up from its source, bringing the soft cream up to his mouth. Tongue darting out, he has a taste of you just as you had tasted him. “Shit—you taste good too, frosty. You’re so sweet, how’d you turn out like this? That’s okay. I’ll deal with you, and then you’ll be just as sweet as you taste.” That fat tip of him presses flush to the source of all your want. “I’ll straighten you out.”

You don’t know what that means, and you are absolutely sure that you don’t deserve it, but any sass is staunched with the utter sweetness of the stretch in your center. Taehyun presses his hips up into you, slowly and internalizing the dropping open of your mouth, the pinching of your brows into a worrying line, and the press of your palms to his broad chest. He takes it and metabolizes it down like cream cake or the plumpest fruits, and he gives you more. More, all the way up until there is no length of him left to give, and nowhere else for him to go.

You feel so, so full. No amount of twinkling jewels or new skirts hold a candle to this. You don’t know what it is, and you don’t know why Taehyun knows, but whatever. Who cares? Breathing out a shudder, you squirm beneath him to search for that dazzling feeling he’d made you feel earlier.

“Stay still,” he barks, steadying himself beside your head with a sturdy, powerful arm. When had he lost his sweater? You don’t know. You might drool over the definition and warm skin there if he didn’t pull the length of him out until just the tip of him threatens to pop out, and then drive right back in before you could. A gaspy breath falls from your mouth, devolving into mewls and whimpers when he does the same over and over and over again, quick with snapping hips and the smacking of his skin against the soft skin of your bottom. Your thigh quivers in his hold, his fingers digging into the fluff of your thigh as he holds you into it. 

Each and every time he slides up against something inside you that makes you feel different. Different from what you felt when you were on his thigh, and different from anything else you’ve felt in the entirety of your life. It’s deeper, right at the very bottom of your belly, sending your veins lazy and your hips twitchy. You want to chase it as much as you want to hide from its power, so all you do is stay in a hazy limbo of sharp gasps and long, drawn out mewls for more.

“No,” he says, his face right in yours. The smell of him, manly and so very sweet like oven-warmed gingerbread, settles over your bones and wiggles its way through your thoughts. It does something to your melted mind, planting a need to cling to him right in the center. Your hands perch all over him: the hair at the back of his head, his working waist, his biceps that flex and strain with his effort, and finally around him so that you can push your cheek to his chest and feel his heart racing there. “You’ll take exactly what I give, and thank me for it. You don’t get to ask for more; not with your mouth.”

“Why?” you say, whining. “I want it—so bad. Please? I’ll be so… so good…” Your voice bounces with each collision of your bodies, and your toes flex and curl at the twisting in your core. Nonetheless, you want more. Whatever this is—this syrupy, pure goodness—Taehyun has shown you something that you will never be whole without again. He has bloomed a flower right in the chest of you, something hungry that will want and want this, and you fear that he will be the only one able to satiate it. 

The thought of the smile he’ll wear, should you come crawling back to his doorstep just for this… 

Taehyun stops, pushing off you with a curled lip. “What will it take to get you to fucking listen?” he says. He pulls himself from you, leaving you to whine and long for that feeling once more. You want to complain and pull him back over you, but with the fire churning in his dark gaze and the sight of his length, covered in that same white, whipped stuff you’d left all over his thigh. 

You’d made a sticky, frosty, frothed mess all over him once again. Really, what would people think of you now? Your mom? Your dad? 

Manhandling you again, he flips you onto your hands and knees and shoves your face into the bed. Any yelp or gasp that tears from your chest is muffled into the sheets. Taking the swell of your hips, his fingers like bites against the powdery, soft skin there, his voice comes from behind you. “Won’t you just listen to me? If you’re gonna be mine, you’re gonna have to start learning how to hear no.” Curling your hair up and pulling it like a handle, he snaps your head back into another stinging, awful tug. It turns the arch of your back into something that you can imagine is a sight to be seen. If the burning where you feel his eyes raking down the curve of it has something to speak of it, that is. You squeeze your eyes shut as if that’ll help you any. “You don’t get everything you want. That’s not how this works.”

You don’t say anything. You have nothing good or sweet left to say.

“Say thank you, and I’ll give it to you good, okay?” he says, running a flattened hand down your spine. “That’s all I want to hear. Show me you can be good.”

The last thing you want to do is to thank him. That would mean admitting that you’ve lost, and that ruffles your preening feathers. But you want that goodness back, you want his hips snapping into you and that tight knot back in your belly. You’d do anything for it; even forget your ego.

Your mind is gone, anyway. Whatever your rational self would do, it doesn’t matter. There’s one thing that you want right now, and getting it is so easy. “Thank you, Taehyun. Thank you so much… I’m sorry I’ve been a brat, and I’m sorry about what I said to you. Please, just… help me. Please, I need you so bad.”

You? Sorry? It’s absurd, and yet, you entirely mean it. Maybe it’s your lazy brain talking, or maybe he really has won.

“See? So sweet when you act right,” he says. “Let me show you what happens when you do.”

You could cry real tears when he sets that same pace, his hands bracing on your hips to pull you deeper into each thrust and the front of your body bouncing against the sheets with each. Your cries grow hoarse and beyond needy, and your insides twist and turn even more dangerously.

You are on the brink of something divine. Something that will melt down so well, good on the tongue and as smooth as chocolate, but as sharp as the snapping of gingerbread.

And, snap, he has.

“Yes!” you cry, straining your shoulders as you reach behind you and curl your fingers around the place where he meets your skin. “S..So good! Right there—thank you, Taehyun!”

He doubles down on you. His length hits a spongy spot in your core, pounding up against the walls there and turning your insides against you. It’s almost too good. “There we go,” he says, voice shaking with a growl. The delivery of his thrusts grows sloppy. You think he feels just as good as you do. “That’s what—” Falling over you, he supports himself with each strong arm dug into the mattress beside your head, his solid front melded to your soft back. “That’s what I like to hear. Here you go—fuck, I’m gonna give you what good girls get, okay?”

You hope it’s more of that melty icing he shot from his length earlier. The knot in your belly tightens, just on the brink of a glittery, bright explosion. “Mhm!” you say, your voice cracking. You want it—you want it so bad. The intensity of it, turning over in your veins and rendering your thighs jelly, sings in your ears. It’s a frightening greatness, but you rage against the urge to drop your hips into the mattress and run from it. You need to finally taste what you’ve been chasing. “Taehyun! Right there—please, don’t stop!”

You were demanding more from him again, but Taehyun didn’t stop this time. Not when his growls and whines against your shoulder tell you enough about how he’s feeling. He tongues and nips at your shoulders, the only sounds echoing off the walls of his room, the hollow smack of his hips against your bottom, and the only smell of the sweet mingling of his gingerbread sharpness against your heady marshmallow. It’s good enough to eat.

Crying out with a frantic whine, the feeling deep in your belly changes once more, and you’re writhing and squirming against him. Your hips buck and chase and run, wild and just as explosively as the tightness shooting down your thighs and up through your lower back.

Everywhere. You feel it everywhere. It’s in the continued bouncing of your body, in each nudge of his tip to a sweet, spongecake spot deep inside you, in his breathless pants into your skin, and in the curling of his fingers into your hair when he releases a hip to do so, and in your pleads when he chases his own delicious release. Your throat tightens, and suddenly the sheets are all too warm around you, and you realize with blistering intensity that another one of those knots builds up in your belly. It’s quicker, short, and bright. You’ve barely even made it through the last, but still, it comes.

“Holy shit,” he growls, hips stuttering and then stilling. He reaches a hand down between your thighs and finds a very sweet button. The breath in your throat catches, and in nothing more than a blink of an eye, you crash again, and then your bodies are two twitching, elated things. He presses himself impossibly deeper into you before shooting that same hotness, sweet ropes of sugary icing right into you, and your fluttering insides hold him tight and eat it up. Your heart pounds in your chest, running amok in your ears and your neck, and you try to catch running breaths to no avail.

Occasionally grinding up into you, though there is hardly any space between your joined bodies to do so, Taehyun shoots more lazy spurts for a few long moments. His breaths slow against your skin, and yours do in your chest. Slowly, you recover as two entangled bodies, all clammy and melted like left in the oven for a bit too long.

Pressing hot, wet kisses to the back of your neck, and then down your spine when he pushes off you and pulls himself out, his tongue darting out against your skin for some, he says, “Taste so good… So sweet, even on your skin…” He brushes the wild tangles of hair from your face and adds, “I wonder if you’ve gone all sweet inside, too? You look like it…” The mess of you, your thick creaminess staining your thighs and his runny load pooling from your hole, is all over. It even makes the sheets beneath you dirty with dribbles of his release as it drips. “I told you I’d get you sweet.”

If that sluggish, sugary thing moving through your veins is sweetness taking over you from the inside, perhaps you have gone sweet. Or, perhaps you now have every reason to become his worst nightmare—just if it gets you this.

You’ll play sweet for now. The softer kisses he seasons your skin with are no less enthralling than the delightful goodness still ebbing away between your thighs. You think that, for the first time, you have lost. 

And, to your very own dismay, it tastes so very sweet. 

... back to the masterlist ⌇ back to strawberryland

✎୭ ashlynn's note BRAT TAMER TAEHUN, amirite?

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[joysbaereal]

How many likes for us to get back together???

PAIRING: Ex!Txt x reader

Genre: fluff

Warnings: jokingly say kys

Yeonjun and Soobin

Beomgyu and Taehyun and Hueningkai

main masterlist

☆ Im thinking of making my page more summer themed🌴☀️👙

[saursoob]

TXT TEXTS - another members pc

• REQUESTED by @astridxxxx !!

• A/N : i haven’t done a ot5 txt smau in a whileee, hehe tysm for requesting ^^

perm tags: @skittlez-area512 @aaa-sia @nishislcve

divider by @/fairytopea !!

[lovesickchoi]

100 WAYS TO LEAVE A LOVER ❥ KTH

⋆·˚ ༘ * prince taehyun of the kang kingdom wanders outside the palace every night to escape his life of royalty. what he doesn’t expect is to meet the love of his life beyond the palace’s borders, which only serves to further fuel his hatred of the throne.

pairing: prince!taehyun x villager!reader ✮⋆˙✐ 16.7k

genre: royal au, angst, smut, loosely inspired by jackson wang’s ‘100 ways’ music video, slight romeo and juliet adaption warnings: multiple mentions of death, suicide, execution, blood, weapon possession, pleasure top!taehyun, oral f!receiving, praise kink, unprotected sex, happy(ish) ending if you squint notes: this is not intended to romanticize suicide whatsoever. also, i recommend watching the music video before reading. the song is so good and the visuals are a great way to set the scene! click here to watch it. also want to mention @luvsicktyun for the amazing help with the color grandients!! ˚₊ · »-♡→ masterlist

Taehyun wasn’t supposed to be here in the first place. This he knew, but he could never bring himself to care enough. Walking amongst the common people was far too invigorating for him compared to the monotony of his every day. It generated a sort of excitement in him that he couldn’t necessarily experience inside the kingdom he was bound to rule someday. Typically, he was careful when sauntering the busy streets of the outer village. But as dusk fell, it was fairly empty save for a few merchants beginning to pack their goods up for the night. He no longer felt the need to conceal his identity, removing the hood of his cloak and letting it fall around his neck for the first time. His eyes fluttered closed for but a moment, letting the gentle breeze fan against his skin as he toyed with the necklace resting over his tunic. Just moments ago, he’d been strolling through the quaint village market, curiosity guiding his steps as he took in the colorful displays and loud haggling. It wasn’t until he noticed a commotion near one of the fishmongers’ stalls that his attention sharpened. You had been caught in a dispute with a gruff merchant who insisted you were trying to steal one of his prized catches. You argued back, voice steady but eyes flashing, making it clear you had paid him fairly. But the merchant wasn’t hearing any of it, his stubbornness only escalating the tension. Taehyun intervened before things could get worse, tossing a few coins at the merchant and taking the fish himself. The merchant grumbled but accepted the payment, leaving you to glower at the prince now standing smugly before you. He couldn’t deny his amusement at how your scowl only darkened realizing who he was. The fish merchant hurriedly bowed in acknowledgment of royalty, but you refused to so much as incline your head, defiant against what all subjects were expected to do. Even so, he placed the fish in your hands, which you accepted with minimal grace before shoving it into your bag. “I had it under control,” you grumble, keeping your eyes low. “You call that having things under control?” Taehyun teased. “But I’ll take that as a thank you.” “Thank you so much, Your Highness.” you flash an ignorant smile, the twinge of sarcasm in your voice not going unnoticed. Taehyun found your defiance incredibly endearing. “So, what’s royalty like you doing out here so late at night?” He's taken aback by your question. Taehyun was not accustomed to someone speaking to him so carelessly and casually. He was eager to continue the conversation with perhaps the most breathtaking person he’d seen in the kingdom yet. His shoulders shrug. “The palace gets boring. Sometimes you just need to get away.” You feign a gasp, hand against your chest in pretend shock. “Of course, your golden palace with hundreds of rooms filled with endless food and things to do must be so uneventful.” Your animosity toward royalty had Taehyun’s eyebrows furrowing. “Anyway, it was nice talking to you, Your Highness.” You spin on your heels, abruptly putting an end to the conversation. You've had enough of royalty for one day. About to head in the opposite direction, Taehyun hastily grabs your wrist to stop you. “Wait!” his voice was filled with urgency. Expectantly, you look up at him in annoyance. “You can’t tell anyone that I was here. I’m not allowed to leave the palace.” “I’ll think about it,” you half-joked, though there was no denying the curiosity he sparked. His grip around your hand loosened before dropping to his side, and you felt a pang of disappointment at the loss of contact. It was strange how speaking with the kingdom’s beloved prince felt as ordinary as chatting with any other commoner. “I’m serious." He refused to break eye contact. "Nobody can know.” There was an undeniable panic in his voice, and you decided to let your defense down for the moment, nodding in reassurance. “Thank you-” Taehyun stopped, not knowing what to call you. You finished the sentence for him, your name confidently rolling off your tongue.

He repeated your name softly, and you had to admit it sounded better coming from his lips. “I’ll have to find a way to repay you.” Taehyun offered you a kind smile which you returned genuinely time.

“You could promise to buy me more fish.” you beamed at him childishly, tugging on the strap of your bag.

“I think that can be arranged.” a smirk splayed across his mouth, knowing you weren’t serious. “And call me Taehyun.”

“I think I prefer Your Highness.” With that, you spun on your heel and hurried down the dirt path, leaving Taehyun rooted where he stood. He watched contentedly as your figure faded into the darkness, pulling his hood back over his head. Staying out any longer would undoubtedly cause problems for him back home, but he could hardly care. After all, the only thing occupying his thoughts on the trek back to the palace was you—the strangely enigmatic, fearless girl from the village he desperately hoped to meet again.

Taehyun was not one to break his promises.

There he stood, leaning against the well in the quiet, shadowed emptiness of the village. It was a small town, so Taehyun prayed it wouldn’t be too difficult to find you again. He was right, of course, a quiet satisfaction lighting up his eyes as they followed your figure through the darkness. You, however, were oblivious to his presence. With your head constantly scanning the surroundings, your eyes sharp and focused, you moved with purpose toward the well, oblivious to who might be trailing behind. Taehyun, cloaked in his dark attire with his hood obscuring most of his face, called your name. It quickly proved to be a terrible idea on his part. Without thinking, your fist shot out, landing hard against Taehyun’s shoulder. He hadn’t expected you to be so strong—much stronger than you appeared. By the time you realized it was him, it was almost too late. Your punch nearly sent him tumbling into the well, but just in time, you grabbed his arm and yanked him back toward you. Once he was steady, you shoved him away in irritation. “Are you insane?” you shouted. “You’re asking if I’m insane? You almost sent me down a well!” Taehyun shouted back, rubbing his now sore shoulder. As much as you wanted to stay mad at him, you simply couldn’t. Not with those doe eyes staring back at you as he winced in pain. You knew you had a strong arm, and you felt especially guilty noticing the bag of fish he held tightly in his opposite hand. Rolling your eyes in obvious defeat, you sigh and take his wrist in your hand. “Come with me.” You give Taehyun no choice but to follow you, dragging him along the path that would eventually lead to your home. It was a quaint living space just large enough for four people. Much smaller than what Taehyun was used to, of course. You were self-conscious of how Taehyun's eyes scaled every inch of your cottage. The feeling of your place being scrutinized had a faint heat rising to your cheeks, but you didn't know that Taehyun wanted to savor the space in his mind. He’d never had the opportunity to see anything like it, considering all he’d ever known was the palace. This felt more like a home than his own chambers. "You can have a seat,” you glanced in his direction. “Sorry, I know it’s not exactly what you’re used to.” “Don’t be. I think it’s lovely.” Taehyun's smile made your heart skip a beat for the first time, and you knew he was being honest with you. He sat down, placing down the bag of fresh fish. He watched you retrieve some ice wrapped in an old rag from the kitchen, taking a seat next to him. “Take your cloak off," you demanded. Taehyun hesitated at your instruction before removing the cloak he used to hide his identity in the village. Goosebumps rose on his skin as you helped him remove one arm from his tunic sleeve. He thought your touch was gentle and steady. You carefully pushed the sleeve up over his shoulder, glancing down his now partially revealed bare chest—his necklace falling against his skin. Clearing your throat after staring just a beat too long, you gently pressed the ice against the green and blue bruise already blooming on his skin. Taehyun hissed at the sudden chill, his hand instinctively covering yours as you held the ice in place. “Sorry for punching you," you spoke up.

Taehyun chuckled at your cute apology. “Don't worry. I guess I did sneak up on you.”

It was quiet again for a moment while you moved the ice around on his shoulder, the proximity between you two becoming a distraction. Your eyes were trained on the task at hand, doing your best to ignore Taehyun’s burning stare. Unable to take the silence much longer, you shift your gaze to the fish on the table. “You didn’t have to actually buy me more food.”

His eyes remained on your face. “I wanted to. I can get as much food as you need. I am royalty after all,” he finishes with a sly remark, emphasis on the word royalty.

“Yeah, well you’re a royal pain in my ass.” you retort.

“Okay, just stop.” Taehyun took the ice from your hand and set it on the table before standing abruptly, forcing you to scoot back in your chair, the wood creaking under the sudden movement. “What is all this anger you have toward royalty? Can you just... explain it to me?”

You tensed at the question. His tone wasn’t defensive, but the subject alone was enough to leave a bitter taste in your mouth.

“My parents,” you replied, voice colder than the ice he’d just set down. “I have them to thank for my hatred of royalty.”

“Your parents?” Taehyun echoed, confusion creasing his brow. He wanted more than anything to understand you. “But they’re not even here. right now."

Emotions boiling over, you stepped forward, your face mere inches from Taehyun’s. “Maybe it’s because your precious royal family had them executed. Maybe that’s why."

Taehyun’s mouth opened, but no words followed. The weight of your admission hung heavy between you, the truth settling like stone. His gaze softened as he noticed the way your jaw clenched, desperately trying to hold yourself together. The way your lip trembled, bitten hard to stop any more words from breaking free, stirred something painful within him.

“I’m... I’m really sorry. I didn’t know,” he said quietly, his voice filled with sincerity and regret.

You were confused. Taehyun was royalty incarnate, but something about him allowed you to let your walls down. All at once, you let the tears spill over your eyes—completely vulnerable in front of the crowned prince of all people. You were supposed to hate him, despise him and everything he represented. But how could you when he wrapped his arms around you so tenderly, letting your body settle against his as you cried for the first time in months over your family?

He could feel the way you trembled against him, the shakes fueled by both sorrow and rage. Resting his chin gently on top of your head, he hesitated before voicing his question, his tone cautious. “Why were they executed?”

Your ear remained pressed to his chest, where his heartbeat quickened—whether from nerves or guilt, you couldn’t tell. But you sensed his hesitation, the uncertainty of whether he should pry further into the tragedy of your parents’ deaths.

“My brother was killed in battle fighting for this kingdom. A year ago today.” Your words were slow, carefully measured, as if the wrong tone might shatter your composure. “He was so young, forced to fight against his will. That’s when my parents realized just how little the palace truly cares about its people. If you’re not living within those palace walls, your life means nothing to them.”

Taehyun clung to every word, his chest tightening with guilt and sympathy. “What did your parents do then?” he asked gently.

“After my brother’s death, they couldn’t stay silent. They started speaking out, warning the village of the palace’s corruption—how they forced children from their homes to fight in wars, how they stole from the poor to maintain their own luxury. Word was spreading quickly, and people were starting to listen.” You swallowed hard, your voice straining against the emotions welling up. “But before they could gain any real momentum... the guards came. They broke into our home and killed my parents right in front of me.”

Taehyun opened his mouth to say something, but you cut him off, determined to finish your story before your courage wavered.

“And that—” you aggressively wiped away the last tear that stained your rosy cheeks, falling back into your chair with a thump. “—is why I hate royalty. And why I hate that stupid insignia you wear around your neck.”

That was the moment your entire facade clicked for Taehyun. The wall you put up every time he was around—it was a result of everything you had endured. You’d seen too much, and Taehyun’s face was a cruel reminder of all the heartache you’d been through.

Taehyun’s next words catch you off guard. Maybe it’s because you’d half-expected him to defend his kingdom, to uphold the image of his people. Instead, he sits across from you, his tone low and sincere.

“Your brother’s death wasn’t in vain, and your parents were incredibly admirable. They did what was right, and my people took that from this village. I know it might not mean much coming from me, but I’m truly sorry for what happened to you.”

For a moment, it hit you. Despite being a prince, Taehyun wasn’t much different from the common people you knew. He seemed more like someone who shared your struggles than someone who ruled over them. “Why are you so different from your snobby royal counterparts, Your Highness?” The sarcasm slipped out before you could stop it.

You had Taehyun grinning from ear to ear, his shoulder pain completely forgotten at this point. He liked this side of you—your resilience. “It’s not that hard to see through the kingdom’s lies, even from the inside.”

“Is that why you escape that place to come here every chance you get?” Taehyun’s smile falters. He forgot that his time here with you wasn’t his reality. It was reaching the darkest point of the night, and he would have to return to the palace soon before people started to notice his absence.

“It’s nice experiencing life outside of what I’ve grown accustomed to. Every day is the same, and it’s suffocating.” Taehyun heaved a long sigh, running a hand through his hair before fixing his sleeve and throwing his cloak back over his shoulders. “But that’s a story for another day.”

You stood with Taehyun as he flipped the hood back over his head, walking him toward the entrance of your home. “Are you implying that I’ll be seeing you again?”

Taehyun’s heart fluttered, and yours did too when he stopped, turning back to look at you. He longed for nothing more than to see you over and over. “Do you want to see me again?”

“Perhaps I do.”

He raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest with a smirk. “I thought you hated royalty.”

“I absolutely do,” you shot back. “But someone has to show you what life is like outside the palace. Who better than me, Your Highness?”

Taehyun gave you one last dazzling smile, his eyes lighting up before he excused himself, jogging back toward the bright lights of the palace, the glow casting a stark contrast to the dark village streets.

It was true that you’d be seeing Taehyun again, and not just once.

Every night at the same time, Taehyun appeared at your front door, and each time he came bearing food and other treats as a thank you for welcoming him into your home.

But it was never the generous gifts that brought you unexplainable joy—it was Taehyun’s company that gave purpose to your days. Every morning when you woke up, you found yourself counting down the hours until he would be knocking at your door.

You couldn’t remember how exactly you’d become so close to Taehyun, but now, you struggled to recall what life was like before meeting him. Months had passed with him woven into your daily routine, a newfound comfort you hadn’t realized you’d needed until now.

Tonight, like most nights, Taehyun had stayed longer than usual. You sat side by side on your bed, the quiet between you comfortable. Somewhere along the way, it became more than just visits—it became the highlight of your day.

Taehyun shifted slightly, his hand brushing against yours. The touch lingered for a moment before he broke the silence. “Where are we headed today?” he asked, his voice soft but edged with concern.

You looked over at him, the weight of your past sitting heavily on your chest. “I thought we could visit where my parents are buried.” You lowered your gaze, but Taehyun gently took your hand in his, his fingers idly tracing the lines of your palm. “It’s in the forest beyond the kingdom’s borders. They stopped letting anyone go there, so I haven’t visited their grave since they were—” Your words faltered, but Taehyun understood, his grip tightening just a little.

“It seems pretty risky. We could get caught,” Taehyun said with caution.

You looked away, suddenly uncomfortable. “I know, it’s stupid. We don’t actually have to go.”

“Hey,” Taehyun said softly, lifting your chin with a finger to meet his gaze. “I never said I didn’t want to go. I just said it would be risky, so we need to be extra careful. I’ll follow your lead.”

You bit your lip, fighting back a grateful smile. “Thank you.”

Taehyun stood up, offering his hand to you. “We should go now.” He gently pulled you to your feet. You grabbed your coat, throwing it over your shoulders before stepping outside. Together, you walked toward the forest—the place you thought you’d never return to.

The road you followed weaved between different shacks within the village, the forest coming into your view after some walking. You could see the way the road abruptly ended, nothing but dirt and leaves scattering the open area, signaling that you had reached the town's borders. A chain-link fence stretched along the dirt road, disappearing into the distance. The metal gleamed, still fresh from its recent installation just a few months ago. It completely enclosed the forest, serving as a clear barrier to deter anyone considering defying the kingdom’s orders and venturing into the tree line.

The fence wasn’t very tall. Anybody could climb over it if they really wanted to, but that didn’t negate the fact that you were much shorter than Taehyun. This became clear as you approached the fence, now staring directly up at it.

You flinched feeling two hands come in contact with your waist, swatting them away and turning to look back at Taehyun with an amused look. “What are you doing?”

“I’m giving you a lift so you can grab the fence a little higher.” Taehyun was defensive but entertained by your reaction. “Is that okay?”

“Oh,” Nodding your head, you turn back to face the fence. “Good idea. Thanks.” You didn’t flinch the next time his hands met your waist, much more firm this time. In fact, your heart raced feeling his touch against you with his chest gently pressed against your back.

"Ready?" you hum softly in response, barely catching your breath as he used his strength to lift you onto the fence.

You quickly latched onto it with your hands and feet, shrieking when your foot slipped. Regaining your balance, you tried to steady yourself. "Shhh!" Taehyun whispered urgently, his eyes wide with concern, worried that your shout would alert anyone nearby.

“Don’t shush me,” you angrily whisper back. “I almost fell!”

“Then be more careful!” Taehyun began trekking up the fence close behind you. Swinging your leg up over the top of the fence, you jump down and land successfully on the other side. Taehyun was right next to you a few moments later. He opened his mouth to say something but stopped seeing the way your eyes glazed over, looking out into the dense forest. Taehyun wanted to pull you away from whatever reminiscent thoughts were crossing through your head, so he gently laced his fingers with yours and pulled you forward. “Lead the way.”

You glanced at Taehyun, whose eyes were already fixed on you. Having him by your side eased the burden of this trip. It gave you the strength to ascend deep into the woods, your legs automatically walking you in the direction of your parents' grave as if you’d been there yesterday.

Fear pulsed through your veins as you walked hand in hand with Taehyun. Though the pitch-black night made it nearly impossible for anyone to find you, you couldn’t shake the memory of what happened to your family. If caught crossing the village boundary, you knew it would only take one mistake to meet the same tragic end.

"We're here," you whispered, snapping out of your grim thoughts. Two stones stood to mark their graves, wilted leaves scattered across the mounds of dirt. The sight was bleak and neglected, a reflection of the kingdom’s indifference to the deaths of two so-called traitors. Taehyun let go of your hand, stepping back as you kneeled before the stones, ignoring the dirt now staining your clothes.

Taehyun propped himself up against a tree, watching you rid the area of the leaves, doing what you could to clean the forlorn graves. He smiles sadly as you sit back on your heels, looking defeated. Your mouth begins moving silently, most likely speaking to your parents, Taehyun assumed.

He deemed the scene too private for him to watch, instead scoping the area for fresh flowers to place down.

It goes on like this for some time before you raise your head up, urgently searching for Taehyun as you’d momentarily forgotten about him. “I’m here.” Taehyun reappears next to you, his voice reassuring. “Are you alright?”

You look with glassy eyes from the dirt back to Taehyun. “Honestly, I’m not sure. But I needed this.”

“I brought these.” Taehyun pulls a bunch of colorful flowers from his pocket as he kneels down close to you. They were beautiful—enough to have you wondering how long you must’ve been in your own world for Taehyun to gather such a perfect collection. “I thought these would help liven things up here.”

You couldn't summon the strength to take the flowers from Taehyun’s hand. Sensing your delay, he took it upon himself to scatter them around the stones. Your eyes followed his every movement, captivated by the delicacy of his actions. Every decision, every gesture he made was so selfless and reassuring—but it made no sense to you.

Taehyun continued speaking as he arranged the flowers, entirely absorbed by the task at hand. “I never told you this, but this necklace was my mother’s.” When he was satisfied with the arrangement, he gently pulled at the collar of his tunic, reaching inside to reveal the necklace. “My mother hated the palace, despised everything the insignia represented. Just like you.” His voice softened as he gazed at the jewelry, his eyes filled with sorrow. “She gave it to me, made me promise to never fall for the kingdom's lies—and to never follow in my father’s footsteps.” He paused, taking a deep breath. “I’ve worn it every day since, even after she passed.”

The air noticeably shifted after Taehyun's confession. It made your head snap up from the ground, looking at the way his eyes reflected equal parts pain and joy at the memory. “Taehyun, I had no idea. I'm so sorry”

“It’s okay. She’s in a better place now. Just one more thing you and I have in common.” Taehyun chuckled to himself, looking up to meet your eyes briefly before looking back at the necklace.

“We can talk about something else if you’d like,” you suggested.

Taehyun hesitated, his mouth slightly parted like he wasn’t sure if he should say what’s on his mind. In any case, he persisted.

“Well, there’s an old myth they tell in the palace. My mother used to share stories about it all the time.” He spoke softer than usual, as though any louder and the moment would break. He seemed to be using the story to keep himself distracted, his words flowing more easily now.

“Mmhm,” you hummed, encouraging him to continue. Without thinking, you edged closer to him, your body unconsciously drawn to him as he spoke.

“An old legend says that two lovers were buried together in this very forest. When the boy died, the girl was devastated. They were madly in love, and she wept over his grave for weeks on end.” He tucked his necklace back into his shirt, his voice becoming more reflective. “The gods, moved by her endless sorrow, took pity on her. They brought him back to life in exchange for her suffering. The myth behind the legend says that only the tears of the deceased’s true love can bring them back, but just for a moment.” Taehyun paused, placing the last flower down and wiping his hands on his pants. “I don’t know why I’m telling you this, now that I think about it. It probably doesn’t help you. But… it’s a beautifully tragic story.”

"How do you always seem to know the right thing to say?" You spoke quickly, unable to take your eyes off him.

Taehyun shrugged, looking away for a moment. "I was just rambling, really."

You cut him off again. "No, I mean it. All I want to do is hate you and your stupid royal blood, but I can’t. I look at you, talk to you, and everything just… feels right. And I don’t know why."

Taehyun raised an eyebrow, his lips twisting into a smirk. "So, you don’t hate me?"

You sighed, feeling a wave of frustration and confusion. His gaze was intense, and your heart beat faster than you'd like. "I hate that I don’t hate you."

In an instant, Taehyun's lips were attached to yours, his hands holding your face gently. It was as if all the emotions he’d been holding back after spending every day with you for the past several months had finally reached their breaking point.

He couldn’t ignore his connection to you any longer. Neither could you as you kissed him back without a second thought, wrapping your hands around his neck and pulling his body impossibly closer to yours.

Taehyun pulled away for a moment, resting his forehead against your own while you looked at each other with the same goofy smile. For the first time in a long time, you were happy. He drew his bottom lip between his teeth, breathing you in. “I’m in love with you.”

He anticipated your reply, holding his breath until you responded with an even more fervorous kiss. Strong hands held your waist against him, tilting his head as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders.

It was a while before you both reluctantly pulled away, Taehyun cutely nudging your nose with his while he held you tight. You finally say the words aloud. “I’m in love with you too, Your Highness.”

“Prince Taehyun. Your presence is requested by the King.” A palace guard peered into Taehyun’s chambers unannounced, prompting an irritated eye roll from the prince. He was dressed in his royal attire, hair neatly styled—such a far cry from the dark clothing and cloak he’d grown accustomed to wearing during his secret visits to you. The formalities of palace life felt increasingly suffocating compared to the freedom he found beyond the castle walls with you.

You.

You were the only thought playing through his mind day in and day out. This distraction had often gotten him into trouble during important meetings concerning the kingdom. His mind would drift away from political discussions, lost instead in the memory of your lips against his, the gentle touch of your hands grazing his neck, and the soothing melody of your voice recounting your day.

Taehyun thanked the servant, excused himself, and walked down the large hallway that led to the main hall where his father, the King, was perched on his throne. He looked at Taehyun rather expectantly, almost disappointed. It was a look that was hard to miss. Taehyun halted a few feet away, bowing respectfully at a ninety-degree angle. “Prince Taehyun,” his father's tone was unsettling. “I’ve been waiting to see you.”

“My apologies, father. I won’t keep you waiting again.” Taehyun stood up straight, looking into the King's eyes. “What did you call me for?”

“You've been acting strange for the past month.” The harshness in the King’s voice made Taehyun’s chest tighten. Conversations with his father were never easy, but this one made him fearful. “You’re distracted, lackadaisical. These are not the characteristics of a crowned prince.”

Taehyun’s heart lodged itself in his throat, but he forced his expression to remain stoic.

“You and I both know I won’t be around much longer. Soon, you will be in charge of this kingdom. But people are starting to notice how absent you’ve been. Tell me, Taehyun, do you even want to be King?”

“Yes, of course I do father.” Taehyun lied through his teeth—the promise he made to his mother ringing in his ears. The last thing Taehyun wanted was to rule over this god-forsaken place.

“Then start acting like it.” The King didn’t look so convinced, and Taehyun mentally cursed himself for it. “I’ve arranged for you to meet the princess of the neighboring Choi kingdom. You will need a queen to help you lead this palace. Someone who will align your focus. Someone to help you make the hard decisions.” You were the only one who could do that for him. It was you who made him see so clearly, Taehyun thought. “I’ve spoken with their King already and we will be planning your wedding to happen within the next week.”

Taehyun felt his whole world crumbling around him. It’d been nearly two weeks since he'd confessed his love for you, and already things were slipping through the cracks. “But father-”

“I don’t want to hear another word out of you.” The King’s tone was cold, final. “This is what’s necessary. And once you take the throne, your first act will be to strengthen the guard presence around the village. We can’t risk another… incident. The kingdom’s been far too lenient with traitors and their offspring.” His gaze darkened. “I won’t have another embarrassment like those fools who dared defy me—what were their names again? Ah, yes. The rebels with the cowardly daughter still skulking around the village.”

Taehyun had never hated someone so much in his entire life. The skin of his knuckles whitened from how tightly his fists clenched. He wanted nothing more than to make his father regret ever speaking of you and your family in such a vile way.

Never in his life had Taehyun practiced so much restraint. There was nothing he could do. If the King ever knew his son was sneaking out of the palace every night to see some commoner, especially the daughter of the kingdom’s infamous traitors, it wouldn’t end well for either of you.

He would have to begin plotting sooner rather than later. If he didn't, Taehyun would be married off to someone who wasn’t you, and the guards patrolling the town would prevent him from ever seeing you again. It was the worst possible scenario he could imagine.

Swallowing his pride, Taehyun spoke through gritted teeth, “I understand, father. May I be dismissed?” With an uninterested flick of his hand, the King waved his son off. Taehyun walked until he disappeared around the corner, breaking into a sprint down the hall once he was out of sight. He made a beeline for his room and slammed the door shut once he arrived. What was he supposed to tell you? All he wanted was to kick and scream like a child. Loud thuds echoed through the palace halls as Taehyun repeatedly slammed his head against his door—for once having no clue where to turn.

Shaky hands ran through his now messed-up hair, painfully imagining his life without you in it. The room appeared to shrink before Taehyun as tears stung the corners of his eyes, clouding his vision. He needed to act. Sitting in his room, dwelling on how sour everything was about to turn, wouldn’t benefit either of you. His eyes wildly darted around the room, desperately searching for his cloak. With shaking hands, he threw aside piles of garments, his frustration growing until his fingers finally found the familiar fabric. He yanked the cloak over his head, not bothering to straighten it before rushing to the window.

Throwing it open, he stared down at the castle’s backside—a familiar escape route he'd taken so many times before.

The night wasn't nearly as dark as Taehyun's usual escapades to visit you, but this was the least of his concerns. His only mission was seeing you. He had to warn you of his father's future plans before he lost you for good.

Taehyun managed to slip through the golden palace gates unnoticed, making his way to the charming village he’d grown so fond of. His pace slowed to a simple stride once he arrived safely.

Suddenly hyperaware of his surroundings, he observed the cottages and the quiet atmosphere—he frowned seeing all the people who were oblivious to the torment they would soon endure once the palace guards began patrolling the village.

He was in front of your home in zero time, the journey being second nature to him at this point. With a few special knocks, your cottage door swings open in seconds. A confused look washed over your face. Taehyun was never here this early. You were elated to see him, but that did little to drown your sudden concern.

Taehyun collapses into your arms nearly the second he lays his eyes on you. His weight completely crumpled against your body, holding you so tight as if you'd vanish the moment he let go. You finally question him. “Your Highness?”

With slow hands, you snake your arms up to wrap them comfortably around his neck, hoping to ease his indiscreetly racing heart against your chest. Taehyun pulls away to kiss you, lips lingering there for longer than usual. “I just need to be close to you right now. Please,” he mumbles against your lips, squeezing you tighter. The gesture made you smile up at him, flattered knowing he was so eager to see you.

You’re the first to pull away from Taehyun, nodding your head toward your home as an invitation. He follows close behind, draping his cloak over the kitchen table before his arms find their way around your waist from behind. You giggle at his clinginess, making your way to your bedroom with him still attached to you.

You guided Taehyun to the edge of the creaky bed, its wooden frame groaning softly beneath your combined weight as you settled down. The lumpy mattress shifted unevenly, straw rustling beneath the worn blankets.

His arms remained wrapped around you, pulling you close despite the bed’s quiet protests. He traced lazy patterns on your hip with his thumb and you let your eyes flutter closed, at peace.

The silence that sometimes found its way between you and Taehyun was usually a comfortable stillness, one that you always welcomed. Today, it was both deafening and hard to ignore.

“Is something wrong?” You asked, but with no response. This time, you picked your head up to gently rest your chin on his chest. Looking up at him, you find that he’s already been staring down at you with a small pout. His expression made you extremely upset, so you leaned up to kiss the pout away from his lips. “Please tell me what’s going on because—”

“Let’s run away together.” There it was. Taehyun’s master plan that he’d been conjuring up ever since the conversation with his father ended. It was the best he could think of—the only feasible option.

A nervous laugh erupts in your throat, unsure whether you should take him seriously or not. “What?”

Taehyun repeats himself much more assured this time, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “Let’s run away together. You and me. Tomorrow.”

He didn't have to twist your arm. Running away with the love of your life and escaping this shitty kingdom sounded more than ideal, despite the obvious dangers. You smile with an adventurous look gracing your features, swinging one leg over his waist to sit up in his lap. “Let’s do it.”

“Are you serious?” Taehyun prayed it wouldn't take you much convincing, but god, did he feel lucky. Hearing your words of agreement left him feeling lighter. He slightly shifted in the bed and rested his back against the wooden headboard, admiring every inch of you while picturing running away hand in hand.

Tender fingers toyed with Taehyun’s, lifting his knuckles gently to your lips as you spoke. “Where shall we go?”

“Into the forest,” he answered, voice absent of hesitation. “We’ll keep running and won’t stop until we reach the clearing. Where we can be free from the chains of this god-awful place. There has to be another village. Somewhere far from here. Somewhere we can finally breathe.”

This was everything you wanted and more. It was hard to picture you and Taehyun spending the rest of your days as they had been the last few months—waiting out the daylight so you could see each other for a few hours at night. There was no future here, that was clear. "Will you meet me by the fence tomorrow night?” you ask him.

“I promise. I’ll be there at dusk.” Taehyun’s hands rest on your thighs, his touch gentle as his fingers continue to trace tiny circles against your skin. He’s searching for the right words. “I wanted to give you something.” Your head tilts in question, curiosity sparking in your eyes. “I’ve been thinking about it for a while.”

“What is it?” you ask with a playful glint in your eyes. “More treats you smuggled out of the palace?”

He cracks a smile, remembering your first encounter with one another. “No. Um, it’s actually this." You held your breath when Taehyun lifted one hand from your thigh to touch his mother’s necklace that’s been hanging around his neck since the day you met him.

Your mouth runs dry at his words. Taehyun was really willing to give up his mother’s necklace, the person he admired the most, for you? You grab his wrist to stop him. “There's no way I can accept this.”

“My mother gave me this to make me promise I’d never devote myself to the kingdom.” His voice trembled as his unsteady hands reached behind his neck to unclasp the chain. Your eyes stayed locked on his, tears threatening to spill over at any moment. “Now, I’m giving it to you to fulfill that promise and prove that my devotion is to you. It symbolizes the day I finally leave the throne behind, for good.”

Taehyun leaned forward with the necklace in his hand, his eyes glimmering in concentration. He looked so pretty, his face inches from yours as he gently brushed your hair to one side. Your eyes fluttered shut, and you felt his hands reach behind your neck to reclasp the necklace. You’ve never been more in love than in this moment. One of his hands dropped down to your waist while the other rolled the necklace’s insignia between his fingers, carefully letting it fall to your chest. With both arms now hugging your waist securely, he bent down to press an affectionate kiss to your neck right over the chain of the necklace. Lips ghosted up your neck and across your jaw with more doting kisses, finally landing on your lips, the place you yearned for him the most.

Your hands cradled Taehyun’s face, pulling him closer as if the distance between you was too vast to bear. The darkness in his eyes mirrored your own, a desperate longing that words could never capture. “Thank you,” you whispered, voice soft as a single tear slipped free, tracing the curve of your cheek. His thumb swept it away, eyes frantically searching your face like he was memorizing every detail. And then, as if his restraint had finally shattered, Taehyun’s lips crashed against yours with a fervor that spoke of yearning, devotion, and a promise he could never put into words. His ministrations against you were equally slow and frenzied. With gentle gripping of skin and soft breaths between kisses, neither of you was able to get enough of the other.

The worn fabric of your dress gathered around your thighs in Taehyun’s grip. His touch burned through the thin cloth, and you nearly shuddered as his fingers slipped beneath it.

Taehyun was dressed only in his finely stitched tunic and trousers, his cloak long forgotten in the kitchen in his urgency to be near you.

He looked so beautifully out of place in your modest cottage—an artifact of sorts. The rich fabric clung to his shoulders, showing off the strong arms that held you. Its elegance is at jarring odds with the simplicity of your surroundings. He looked like he belonged to another world. One he was all too willing to leave behind.

“You look ridiculous in that,” you teased, your fingers toying with the delicate embroidery along his collar. “Too formal. Too… royal.”

His lips quirked into a smile, chuckling with you. “It’s not exactly practical for where we're going, is it?” His fingers slid along the now exposed skin of your hips, hiking your dress up around your waist. The pressure of his touch makes your breath hitch. “Compared to you, I’m overdressed.”

“Then take it off me.” The words slipped from your mouth before you could think twice, bold and shameless.

Taehyun’s expression shifted, his eyes darkening with something beyond amusement. “Anything you want, princess,” he whispered, his voice low and rough, the nickname rolling off his tongue. Princess—the word repeated in your head. His hands moved with careful intent, gathering the woven material of your dress and lifting it slowly and deliberately over your head, his gaze locked onto yours.

Taehyun let out a suppressed groan seeing your exposed body in nothing but your linen chemise. Unable to help himself, his fingers skimmed over the nearly see-through piece of clothing. His fingers barely brushed against your bare skin, dancing over the soft arch of your shoulder before trailing down your arm. The touch was gentle, burning your skin into the memory of his fingertips.

His breath caught as his hand ventured over your chest, fingertips following the delicate curves of your breasts, and eventually to your hardened nipples showing through the thin fabric. His hands moved to grip your sides, just beneath your arms, while his thumbs began tracing circles around them.

Goosebumps rose on your skin at the feeling when a soft, breathy moan you've been holding on to left your lips. Subconsciously, you arched your back into his sinful touch, hips buckling down into Taehyun’s lap. Taehyun was impossibly hard beneath you—all because of you. Your mind, your body, every secret and habit he’d memorized. The thought of you consumed him, stirring a primal need to claim every inch of you. He wanted to exist where no one else could, woven into your very essence.

Carefully, your hands reached for the hem of his tunic. Taehyun was eager to oblige, letting you lift it over his head and discard it onto the floor. Your hands explore his soft skin, running across his chest and stomach, which instinctively tensed at your touch.

Taehyun’s mind continued to spiral with thoughts of you. He needed more. He wanted so much of you that he’d never have enough. With this thought, his rough hands gripped your hips, dragging you against him in slow, deliberate grinds.

A low hiss left his lips at the increased pressure. Your hands rested on his shoulders, focused on the way his bottom lip was drawn between his teeth in focus. Testing the limits, Taehyun's hands gingerly tugged at the linen chemise still hugging your body—an annoying inconvenience to him. With a nod of permission, you took it upon yourself to pull the final layer of fabric from your body.

"You're breathtaking," he whispered in awe. "I don't think I'll ever get enough of looking at you."

Taehyun meant every word. Having you laid bare before him felt like a privilege—one he would never take for granted.

A quiet blush crept across your cheeks at the compliment. You couldn't remember the last time you'd been so vulnerable with a man. Nobody had ever made you feel the way Taehyun did. So cherished, so desired, so utterly beautiful in his eyes.

You craved the warmth of his lips against yours once more. Pressing your chest to his, you captured his mouth in a fervent kiss, desperate and insatiable. Your lips moved together in perfect harmony, a dance instinctual and familiar, as if you had been made for this, for him, and nothing else.

Taehyun's tongue pushed past his lips, venturing its way past your own turning the kiss feverish. Flesh against flesh, you allowed him to explore the cavern of your mouth. The sensation spread warmth across your body, quickening the needy roll of your hips against his. A throaty moan was elicited from Taehyun from the sudden change in pace. The soft sounds of his pleasure fueled your confidence, urging you to explore further. You wanted him to feel as cherished and beautiful as he made you feel. Gradually, your kisses trailed down his sharp jawline, each press slower and more heated than the last, like a growing fire.

Your lips moved down his neck, across his collarbone, before returning to his ear, where his breath caught in a delicate whine. Smiling against his skin, you lingered there and savored the moment, your lips teasing the sensitive spot you had found. In a daring move to enhance his pleasure, you trail a sneaky hand down into Taehyun's pants, palming him underneath the material. This time, your name loudly left his mouth in a needy cry, hips bucking up into your hand to match your movements. He was on cloud nine at this point, your hand rubbing his throbbing cock as your tongue traced just beneath his ear. It was short-lived as Taehyun's hand sharply gripped your wrist, stopping your motions. If he let you persist, he'd be cumming just like this. "What's wrong?" you whine, missing the desperate sounds he made. Out of breath, Taehyun wrapped both arms around your body, flipping you onto the bed and hovering above you, caging you in completely. The energy in the room shifted with a single movement. God, how you desired him.

Taehyun’s eyes searched your face, captivated by the sight of you beneath him—angelic, flushed with desire, your chest heaving with each breath, lips slightly parted, and your eyes wide, completely at his mercy. The way you looked at him, as if he were the only thing that mattered in the world, the way you lay there trusting him with everything. You knew him—the real him. And with that knowledge, you made him feel more than he ever thought possible.

He wanted to return that feeling to you tenfold. To make you feel special, seen, adored, and cared for in a way no one else ever had. This was more than just a moment—it was a promise, a perfect send-off before you both escaped together to spend the rest of your lives in a world built just for the two of you. He wanted to show you how a true princess like you deserved to be treated. "Nothing is wrong, my love," he finally responds, his eyes fixed on you as though you were the only thing that mattered. A smile tugs at your lips, and it makes his heart skip a beat. "I don't want you doing anything tonight. I just want you to lay there... to feel good. Let me tend to you like a princess." His voice wavers, and you can hear the desperation creeping in as he buries his head in your neck, grinding against you for some much-needed friction. "Please," he whines, his voice soft and pleading. "Let me take care of you."

You've never wanted anyone more in your entire life than you did at this very moment. You wanted to be devoured by him. "Yes," your voice comes out in a breathless whisper. "Please... you can do anything you want with me. I'm all yours." You're all his. Those words alone made Taehyun spring into action. With a shallow kiss to your lips, he moved down your body, each inch of his journey intensifying the desire coursing through him.

He refused to neglect a single inch of your body. Your neck, jawline, collarbones, shoulders, breasts, stomach—each press of lips followed by a proclamation of his infatuation with you. He was like a lovesick puppy, panting and unable to detach himself from you even for a moment.

Hands gripping the flesh of your thighs, Taehyun parted your legs making room for his face. A gentle swipe of his finger against your soaked folds was enough to have your back arching in pleasure. You were so unbelievably wet from this simple touch. Taehyun was mesmerized by how drenched your cunt was before him. He could hardly believe you were real, that he had the privilege of touching you. The thought alone made him twitch in his pants with anticipation. Settling against the mattress, he positioned himself comfortably, his arms wrapping around your thighs to pin your hips firmly to the bed.

He started with a careful lick of his tongue against your clit, careful and purposeful. Taehyun’s gaze never left your body, his focus honing in on every subtle shift and reaction beneath his touch.

He craved nothing more than to be perfect for you, instinctively aligning his movements with the signals you gave him, ensuring everything he did was exactly what you needed.

The more you writhed beneath him, the harder his tongue worked against you. It swiped across your folds, lapping up every little bit of your sweet arousal. You were addictive to Taehyun, and he couldn’t help but think this might be his favorite thing in the world.

His grip on your legs was unyielding, keeping you pressed to his mouth as he moved with desperation, your body trembling under the waves of pleasure he created. "Taehyun," you moaned his name inappropriately, your hand threading through the tufts of his hair, guiding him exactly where you wanted him. "Just like that… you feel so good," you whined in need. You had never felt like this before.

Taehyun groaned lowly against your folds, the praise making his head spin. He was doing everything right—everything you needed. Slowly, he moved his head back and forth, the firm pressure of his tongue relentless. No matter how much you tugged at his hair or tried to move your hips, he refused to relent. You could feel the edge approaching, and Taehyun could sense it too as he held you firmly against his face. "Yes, please don't stop," you pleaded, practically drooling with how close you were to release. A few more subtle movements of his tongue against you and you were seeing stars. Taehyun never lets up his actions, allowing you to ride out your high and bask in every ounce of the pleasure that coursed through you.

His chest swelled with pride feeling you shaking on his tongue, pretty sounds never ceasing to leave your equally pretty lips. He watched you with a quiet amazement.

The lewd sight before him had Taehyun discretely grinding himself down onto your bed for some form of relief. He thought he could do this to you forever. Taehyun needed to see you release beneath him again as if his very life depended on it. He would do anything to hear those sweet sounds and watch your face twist in pleasure once more. One time was not enough. Taehyun wouldn't care if your next orgasm was around his cock or not. If you asked him to stay between your legs all night, he'd do it without protest. Taking his pointer and index fingers, Taehyun spread your folds apart, rubbing your clit with his middle finger. A sharp shriek escaped you, head thrown back against your pillow at the overstimulation. He relished in the way your hole leaked with arousal, clenching around nothing. Eyes fixated on your cunt, Taehyun continued to grind his hips against the bed. A low moan left his own lips at the thought of how much pleasure he was giving you. The only thing stopping him was your firm hand caressing his cheek, pausing his movements. Mesmerized, he looks up to see what you need, his lips glossy and slick with arousal. "Yes, princess?" he's quick to ask, eager to serve you. "I need more of you," you pant, the longing in your voice undeniable. He knew exactly what you wanted. Taehyun stood up from the bed, slipping two fingers past his lips to clean the arousal from them before reaching down to remove his final layers of clothing.

You sit up eagerly on your elbows, eyes fixed on Taehyun as he removes his undergarments. The sight before you is mouth-watering—such a beautiful prince, once capable of commanding a kingdom, now standing before you, stripped of his title.

And yet, instead of holding any power, he kneels back on the bed, completely at your mercy. Your stomach flutters, overwhelmed by how willingly he offers himself, prioritizing your pleasure above all else.

Your body is once again enveloped by Taehyun’s much larger frame. As if the thought of being separated from you for even a second is unbearable, his lips find your neck almost instantly.

There’s nothing rushed or frantic in his movements. Every action he has taken since he placed that necklace around your neck has been slow, intentional, and with one thing in mind: your satisfaction. His lips and nose traced the cool chain resting on your neck, his kisses gradually migrating to your jaw. Amidst the soft presses of his lips, his hand glided up your thigh with slow movements, each touch sending a shiver through you as he positioned himself between your legs. "You sure this is okay, love?" Taehyun wanted to ensure your absolute comfort. He's sat back on his knees now, straddling you as he runs his tip along your wet folds. Fuck. How could you possibly say no when the man you loved so deeply sat before you, looking like that? You were practically drawing him into you.

"Please, take care of me, my prince. Make me yours."

Taehyun’s breath hitched at your desperation. You sat up for a moment, running a greedy hand down his body, making it harder for him to hold back. With a soft growl, he gently pushed you back onto the bed, unable to resist any longer.

He hovers above you once more, finally pressing his length into your entrance. Loving hands gripped your waist tentatively as if you were made of porcelain. He had promised to be gentle, to give you everything you needed. After a few shallow thrusts, allowing you to adjust to his size, he finally bottomed out inside you, the connection between your bodies complete. Taehyun hissed the moment he filled you, throwing his head back in pure delight. You weren't just his princess—you were a goddess, sent to save him, to claim him. He lay flat on top of your body, skin to skin, as his arms wrapped around you in a loving embrace. Taehyun made tender love to you in a way he never had before. Every careful roll of his hips sent your eyes fluttering closed, your hands digging into his muscular back that flexed with every movement. You couldn’t speak, but your body whispered everything it needed. You held onto him like a lifeline, your legs wrapping around his waist, pulling him deeper into you.

Taehyun breathed heavily as your lewd moans filled the air, far louder than when he had gone down on you. The way your whines and cries grew with each thrust of his hips, the way his name escaped your lips—it sent a jolt through him, sparking every nerve. The feeling of your nails dragging across his skin only made him crave more. When you tried to meet his hips, he pressed you further into the bed, unable to resist the urge to give you everything you wanted. Seeing you like this—so undone, so lost in pleasure—was all Taehyun needed. He never imagined that your pleasure could drive him so wild, that watching you in this state would make him lose himself completely.

He dropped his head against your neck, fucking deeper into you with each painfully slow thrust. His movements were hard and unrelenting, as he ground against you with a raw, desperate need. "Fuck, you sound so beautiful," he murmured against your skin, his voice unsteady. Your moan, loud and breathless, slipped into his ear, making his spine tingle. "Feels good, princess?" Tears begin to prickle at the corners of your eyes when his hips curl just right, hitting your g-spot over and over again. You gripped his hair, tugging him up from your neck, forcing his eyes to meet yours. A wicked smile curved your lips as you watched his breath hitch. "You make me feel so good, Tae. You're doing so well," you purred, your voice dripping with praise. "Shit," Taehyun's eyes widened at your praise, his movements becoming more urgent. You had no idea how much your approval affected him. "I love you so much, I can't control myself." The mix of emotion and pure pleasure became overwhelming. Taehyun lowered his forehead to rest against yours, his breath ragged as his hand reached up to intertwine his fingers with yours, holding your hand firmly next to your head. Your gaze never wavered, locked in an intense connection as Taehyun continued his movements, each thrust purposeful and deep. His lips parted with a low groan before he captured your mouth in a kiss, holding it there as he quickened his pace, desperate to bring you to the edge once more. You called his name in a soft symphony of breathy moans, each one fueling Taehyun's movements, pushing him further into a frenzy. "I want to have you like this forever," he whispered, his words shaky as with his own release drawing near. "I'll never let anything happen to you. I'll always take care of you—just like this." Taehyun’s promises tumbled from his lips, soft and needy, growing more desperate the closer he got. Your body arched against his, your fingers tightening around his hand, knuckles turning white as you clung to him. "I'm gonna cum Tae," you barely choked your words out. Especially as Taehyun reached his hand between you both, rubbing hard circles over your clit to get you there. "It's okay," he murmured, his voice soft as you whined against him. "Let go, princess. I'm right here." One final thrust and you were there, gripping Taehyun's body hard while you screamed his name. The sound leaving your lips combined with your walls clenching around his cock had him cumming almost instantly, as if you' given him permission. It was everything he craved—to see you whole, utterly consumed by him. It took Taehyun a few moments to regain his senses. Even as he softened, he was reluctant to pull out of the warmth that felt so perfect around him. When he finally did, a sinful groan slipped from his mouth, his chin tucked to his chest as he watched the way his release mixed with yours, coating his length as he slid out of you. When Taehyun finally looked up at you, a smile spread across his face. You were already looking up at him, cheeks glowing with a soft blush, hair adorably matted to your forehead, glistening with sweat. He reached out, gently tucking a few stray strands away before cradling the side of your neck, his thumb tracing circles along your cheek.

You looked like an angel before him—his angel. The one he was lucky enough to steal away, to disappear with forever.

Your own heart was beating fast out of your chest. The beautiful boy above you made everything you'd ever been through worth it. Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough. Taehyun settled himself next to you on the bed, not once allowing his touch to leave you. He pulled you along with him, securing one hand around your waist while the other found your hair, playing with it as he hummed a tune.

You let out a content sigh as Taehyun tucked you against him. He pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead, his lips warm and tender.

“You okay?” he murmured, voice thick with exhaustion and filled with something even deeper—devotion.

You nodded, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. “More than okay.” Your fingers drew tiny shapes on his chest. “I think… this might be the happiest I’ve ever been.”

Taehyun’s arms tightened around you, his heart thudding beneath your touch. “Good,” he whispered. “Because I’m never letting you feel anything less than this again.”

You smiled, closing your eyes as he continued humming softly, a melody meant only for you. You stayed in each other’s arms like this for the rest of the night. Tomorrow would finally mark the first day of your new life together. But for now, you had this. You had him.

It was nearly impossible for you to sit still the next day. You had woken up much earlier than usual as your body anticipated your escape. Anxious fingers tapped at your leg while thoughts ran rampant whenever you attempted to sit down and relax. Pacing your cottage seemed to be the only way of passing the time.

Taehyun’s actions mirrored your own back at the palace. It was barely seven in the morning and he’d already gathered what little items he deemed important enough to bring on your journey. Quite honestly, the only thing he needed was you. Everything else was meaningless and would only serve as a bleak reminder of the kingdom.

He pushed his way through the heavy double doors that lead outside to the palace garden. Contrary to the rest of the palace, it was a rather beautiful place that Taehyun always wished he could take you, had your circumstances permitted it. Various colors and flora decorated the green, spreading as far as the eye could see. It was the one place inside the palace walls that put his mind at ease. Taehyun felt it was the last place remaining untouched and uncorrupted by the kingdom.

More importantly, it was the last place he'd been with his mother. Just looking at the flowers and greenery sprouted an unexplainable strength within him. Taehyun made a mental note to tell you all about the garden when he saw you tonight.

“Prince Taehyun?” a voice of one of the garden keepers sounded from behind, interrupting Taehyun's inner monologue. He turned on his heel, looking at the stunned guard who quickly bowed as Taehyun faced him. The keeper looked familiar—Hueningkai, if he recalled correctly. A newer guard who’d grown up within the kingdom, around Taehyun’s age. “You’re not supposed to be here.”

With a tilted head, Taehyun looked puzzled at the keeper’s words. “What do you mean?”

The keeper's eyes went wide in realization of the admission he had let slip from his mouth, stumbling over his words in a failed attempt to backtrack. “O-oh nothing, my prince. I didn't—I just mean you’re awake earlier than usual.”

A red flag automatically went off in Taehyun’s head. He took several sudden strides forward, and the keeper backed away as he did so. There was something off. Taehyun felt it in his gut. “Don’t lie to me. Who gave you orders? What’s happening today?”

“I’m not... I'm not supposed to say.” Hueningkai kept his eyes low out of respect.

The immense fear in Hueningkai's eyes made Taehyun’s own gaze soften with guilt. It was the same fear he imagined in the eyes of villagers whenever they felt threatened by the throne.

Taehyun hated himself for wielding his title in such a way. It made him feel like his father, using status and power to instill terror in people.

Taking a swift step back, Taehyun eased the tone of his voice. “I won’t tell anyone you told me, Kai.”

Hueningkai’s eyes flicked up at the sound of his name, darting around nervously. Taehyun could see him weighing the risk of divulging anything to the crowned prince. With a tight swallow, Hueningkai quickly babbled, “A few criminals are being captured and taken to the palace dungeons this morning. They're set to be brought out in front of the palace for the public to witness."

Taehyun didn’t understand. “Why wouldn’t you be allowed to tell me this?”

“The King made it very clear that you know nothing about the execution. That your presence would only agitate things.” "Execution?"A wave of confusion washed over Taehyun. His father had always made a point to inform him of every ordeal that occurred inside and outside of the palace. He was never kept in the dark as the crowned prince, not when he was expected to understand the duties of a King. Why would his father decide today of all days to shut Taehyun out?

It wouldn't matter in the end—he would be gone with you by his side in less than a day. Still, part of Taehyun felt unsettled by the conversation.

"Thank you." He didn't wait for the keeper's response, his body already moving sharply toward the palace. The urgency to see you grew stronger with every step.

You, on the other hand, had been quietly rehashing the getaway plan in your mind while Taehyun busied himself at the palace. Perched on the edge of your bed, you ran your hand over the crease in the sheets where Taehyun’s body lay with yours just the night before.

Your coat hung over the wooden kitchen chair, pockets stuffed with what little items you actually need for your journey with Taehyun; a few pieces of memorabilia from your family, some money, and snacks to keep you satiated.

Uncertain of what else to do to pass the time, you decided to fill a canteen with water for both yourself and Taehyun, knowing that a long journey was ahead.

Walking the short gravel path to the well, you couldn’t help but laugh, remembering your second encounter with Taehyun when you nearly saw him tumble down the well. You two had come so far, and now, you were preparing to run away forever with him. Bending over carefully, you held the metal canteen under the spout, pushing the pump down and watching the cold water flow out. The sun's rays glinted against the shiny canteen perfectly, nearly blinding you. But the longer you stared at the canteen, you couldn’t help but notice a dark figure growing larger in its reflection. After a moment, you could easily figure out that it was a large man approaching you at full speed. You’d recognize that insignia anywhere etched on the front of his garments. It was a palace guard—and he was running straight at you.

With your back still turned, you quickly step back, planting one foot on the ground while swinging your body around. Your arm extends as the metal canteen comes in contact with the palace guard’s face just in time. The impact stung your hand, but it was nothing compared to the way the guard flew back at the blunt force, landing hard on his back. Your strike bought you enough time to sprint in the opposite direction, but as you turned, you saw another palace guard approaching from that same direction. With no other choice, you were forced to retreat down the path toward the forest.

Your heart pounded painfully in your chest, the sound of blood rushing in your ears as you ran. Every step was fueled by fear, by the knowledge that everything was at risk. It couldn’t be a coincidence that guards had appeared in the village today of all days. They’d already taken your parents and brother—what more could they possibly want from you? For a brief moment, a dark thought twisted in your mind: Did Taehyun betray you? Had he told them? But no… He wouldn’t. He couldn’t. Your trust in him steadied your breath, the doubt slipping away as quickly as it had come.

Luckily, you were quick on your feet. The familiar chain-link fence that marked the boundary to the forest soon came into view. You were so close. Just a little farther and you’d make it. All you had to do was scale the fence and keep running, not stopping until you were out of sight. Taehyun would realize something was wrong soon enough, right?. He’d come for you that night, and your plan would unfold just as you’d imagined.

You made the mistake of glancing over your shoulder, only to realize both guards were now hot on your heels. The distance was closing at an alarming rate. With the fence now directly in front of you, you mentally cursed yourself realizing that Taehyun wasn’t here to help lift you this time. Regardless, you didn’t stop your momentum as you jumped as high as you could and grabbed onto the fence, smiling in victory once you’d settled yourself onto it.

Your mini-celebration came to an abrupt end as large hands gripped your ankle roughly, ripping you down from the fence and forcing you to fall straight to the ground. You landed hard on your stomach, knocking the wind out of you as you struggled to breathe any air. The first guard grabbed you by your hair, pulling you up to your feet with no remorse. You reached up with all your strength, trying to grab the guard's hands and break his firm hold on your hair. Kicking and struggling with every ounce of power you had, you fought to escape, but it was no use. The other guard swiftly pulled your hands behind your back, tying them together with a rope that cut painfully into your wrists.

“Let me go!” you struggled against the confinements.

“Be quiet," one of them grumbled to you. “We have direct orders from the King to apprehend you.”

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” you couldn't hide the disgust in your voice. You squeezed your eyes shut at the pain overwhelming your body from both exhaustion and being handled so brutally. “I haven’t done anything wrong!”

“We're just following orders.” "That's your problem," you spat, looking up at the palace guards with pure disdain. "You follow the kingdom’s orders blindly, without question. You’re nothing but dogs with no sense of humanity." They must've deemed your fighting words not worth responding to, silence ensuing. You were out of options at this point. Exhaustion completely washes over your body, and you’ve lost the strength to struggle in your restraints. The most courage you could muster was to glare up at the guard who watched you closely. His eyes were keenly focused on the insignia around your neck. Reaching out to examine the charm connected to the end of the chain, you barely had a second to react before he ripped it off of you, shoving it deep into his pocket. He smirked. “I don’t believe this belongs to you.”

“Give that back!” You further protest against the wrist restraints until the other guard knocks you onto your knees, shutting you up. You fell with a thud, out of breath and completely defeated.

An image of Taehyun’s face played in your mind, etched in a way that made your heart ache. You could see the way his eyes always studied you, full of quiet curiosity, trying to understand every little part of you. You imagined the gentle pressure of his lips, brushing against your temple, soft and reverent, before trailing down to capture your own lips. A smile tugged at your own, the warmth of his touch still lingering in your chest.

That was all you could hold onto before something hard and unforgiving came in contact with your head, forcing your vision to fall completely black.

A sudden panic washed over your entire body. Slowly regaining consciousness, your eyes darted back and forth underneath your eyelids before shooting wide open with a loud gasp.

Everything felt fuzzy. Even through the haze, you could tell that you were no longer in the village. Your surroundings felt foreign, distant, like they belonged to someone else’s world. You blinked several times, the world around you shifting slowly into focus, only to be stabbed by the harsh contrast of sunlight and the palace’s blinding yellow lights, glaring down at you like judgment.

The palace.

Your stomach churned. Those pathetic guards had dragged you, unconscious and helpless, all the way here. You were sitting at the bottom of the grand palace stairs, your body aching as the weight of your situation sank in.

Your chest burned with fury. Anger surged through your veins like wildfire, making your hands clench involuntarily. The sight of the dozen or so guards, poised like statues, made your blood boil. The air was thick with the murmurs of the palace citizens, gathered in some sick mockery of a crowd. They all stood idly by, watching as if this were the best entertainment they'd seen in weeks. It was the King, sitting like some kind of wretched deity at the top of the stairs, who held your eyes the longest. His eyes, filled with contempt, watched down on you and the others, indifferent to the suffering around him. You could feel his gaze like a weight pressing down on you, and all you could feel was the heat of your anger.

When you noticed the line of people waiting behind you as a guard shoved you toward a man with a sharp sword, one thing became clear.

This was an execution.

Taehyun needed to see you as soon as possible. There's no way he could wait for nightfall at this point. Kai’s words had left him teetering on the edge. He knew that he had to leave the palace immediately.

The doors leaving the garden burst open under Taehyun’s force, his urgency propelling him forward as he hurried through the palace corridors toward his chambers.

He snatched his cloak, swinging it over his shoulders along with the few belongings he had prepared. There was no time to sneak around the grand halls, no time for caution. He didn’t care if someone saw him.

But first, Taehyun wanted to see his father one last time before he left for good. There were a few final words he needed to exchange with him—a final nail in the coffin. He would make sure the King regretted every cruel decision he ever made—how he mistreated his late wife and his only son, the only people who had ever been close to him. And when Taehyun was finished, he would disappear with you, leaving nothing but ashes of the kingdom’s sins behind. The King would never see him again.

With a sharp turn around a corner in the direction of the King’s throne, Taehyun abruptly collided with the large body of a palace guard who seemed to be in just as much of a rush as he was. The guard was quick to express his remorse. “Prince Taehyun, my apologies.”

“It's fine,” Taehyun’s words were sharp and to the point, having little time for banter of any sort. “Where is my father?”

“I believe the King is somewhere just outside of the palace.”

“For today's execution?” Taehyun retorted. The guard's eyes widened just in the slightest at Taehyun's knowledge of the executions occurring today. But he was quick to regain his composure, nodding in confirmation with his head hanging low to avoid Taehyun’s eyes.

“Thank you. You may carry on.” The guard bowed lowly at Taehyun’s dismissal. On any other day, Taehyun would’ve paid little mind to the palace guards he came in contact with and continued his mission through the palace, but the faint sound of metal clinking against the marble floor made Taehyun stop cold in his tracks.

A glint of silver caught his attention, and his heartbeat quickened when he saw a necklace lying at his feet.

Slowly, he bent down and let the chain fall into his palm, the familiar insignia cool against his skin. His fingers traced the insignia between his fingers the same way he'd done the night before when he fastened it around your neck.

Taehyun lost all sense of rationality watching the guilt creep its way into the guard’s eyes. They darted frantically between the prince's face and the necklace now in his hands. Taehyun spoke through gritted teeth, “Where did you get this?”

“Your High-”

“Where the fuck is she?” he snarled, shoving the guard against the stone wall with a force that rattled the air. His forearm pressed violently against the guard’s throat, fury blazing in his eyes.

The guard’s silence spoke louder than words ever could.

Taehyun’s chest heaved, his breath quivering as he fought against the truth clawing at his mind. A strangled sob nearly escaped him. He already knew the answer.

Yet he still repeated himself, voice cracking and barely more than a whisper. “Where is she?”

The guard did nothing but turn his head away in shame, eyes looking in the direction of the palace entrance where the execution was being carried out just on the other side. With a final, furious shove against the wall, Taehyun released the guard and took off, sprinting down the corridor with reckless abandon. His boots pounded against the floor as he charged toward the entrance, his breath ragged and his vision blurred. Reaching the grand doors, he threw them open with all his strength, their heavy frames crashing against the walls with a deafening roar. He was met by the glaring afternoon sun that shone, a complete contrast to the scene playing out directly in front of him as his father and the people of the palace turned to see who’d just burst through the doors.

Taehyun’s eyes frantically searched the crowd, his chest heaving as he scanned the sea of faces. When his gaze finally locked onto yours, a helplessness crashed over him like a tidal wave, something more agonizing than anything he'd ever known.

You knelt at the feet of the executioner, hands bound cruelly behind your back. Your trembling body swayed, but your eyes remained steady as you looked up, glassy and sorrowful, meeting his bewildered stare.

“Taehyun!” you screamed, your voice cracking under the weight of terror and longing. It was the last sound to leave your pale lips, the final plea of a soul torn apart.

As if your call had been a signal, the executioner drove the blade of his sword through your torso from behind. Pain rippled through you, sharp and unforgiving, and yet your eyes never left his. Even as darkness claimed you, you held his gaze.

“No!” Taehyun screamed at the top of his lungs, dropping to his knees as he watched the life slowly leave your body. You fell to the ground, your lifeless form marred by the blade that protruded from you by the hands of the executioner.

Taehyun couldn’t hear anything except the high-pitched ringing in his ears. It was as if the world had collapsed in on itself, leaving only that unforgiving, suffocating noise. His body shook so violently that his hands fell to the ground beneath him, palms scraping against the harsh stone.

The entire world had shattered before him. His gaze remained locked on your body, crumpled and still, blood pooling from the wound in your chest like spilled ink staining the ground. The warmth and life that once radiated from you were gone, stolen by the cruelty of this place.

He couldn’t protect you. He didn’t keep his promise to run away. His chest tightened with the force of his sobs, grief tearing through him with a brutality that left him gasping for air. And the realization twisted itself into his soul—he’d lost you. Forever.

It was his father’s voice repeatedly calling his name that brought him back down to Earth. “Prince Taehyun,” the King called over and over, breaking through his trance. He hadn’t realized he was crying either. Uncontrollable tears soiled his cheeks, his face flushing as he watched the guards drag your unmoving body away. “Taehyun, stand up! Kings do not cry over their subjects.” he walked over to grip his son by the elbow and yanked Taehyun to his feet. “Whether we loved them or not.”

Taehyun's chest tightened at his father’s revelation. Without thinking, his hands shot forward, shoving his father with both hands, nearly sending him down the treacherous palace steps. His rage was uncontainable.

“You knew about her—about us—this entire time, didn’t you?” he spat, his voice tainted with betrayal.

The King took a moment to compose himself, surprised by his son's emotion. Tahyun had never been one to act out, let alone in front of the entire kingdom. The guards carefully worked their way toward the altercation, to which the King simply waved off, wanting to hear him out. “Taehyun, you should be smarter than that. I have eyes all over the palace.”

Taehyun’s stomach twisted—the fishmonger.

The only one who had seen his face the day he met you. The same man who had argued with you over payment, unwilling to believe you had paid fairly. He must have held a grudge against you—against both of you. Or maybe he had simply traded village secrets to the crown for his own gain.

Taehyun felt sick. He should have known. His father had always had informants lurking in the village.

“So your solution was to take away the one thing that made me happy?” Taehyun yelled.

His father’s expression remained unchanged, his face a mask of indifference as if Taehyun’s words meant nothing. Cold and callous, he continued, “She would have been nothing more than a distraction from your duties as King.” Without a second glance, Taehyun’s father turned on his heel, striding back into the palace. But before he crossed the threshold, he paused mid-step, glancing over his shoulder with a sneer. His eyes locked onto Taehyun’s, swollen and brimming with unshed tears.

“I always knew you were just as foolish as your mother.”

The next thing Taehyun knew, he was on top of his father, unleashing all of the pent-up hatred of him and the throne. It took three guards to finally pull Taehyun off of the King, carrying him all the way to his chambers despite his thrashing and protesting.

The guards dropped Taehyun onto the floor of his room with a thud. His movements came to a complete halt as he quit his demonstrations, completely drained of any willpower he might have had left. The doors slammed shut behind him as he drew his knees up into his chest, wrapping his arms around them.

He remained in that position for the rest of the day, sobs bubbling from his chest every now and then. His cries only became louder as dusk fell, knowing he was no longer meeting you at the fence to escape into the forest that night.

Taehyun rarely left his room in the weeks following your execution. He only came out every once in a blue moon to attend to any princely duties his father forced upon him. Each task was promptly followed by a quick return to his bed.

He had become the unfortunate subject of gossip throughout the entire kingdom. The King, next to mortified, was consumed with shame over how the palace viewed his son—the future King.

To them, Taehyun was nothing more than a disgrace, the prince who couldn’t even hold himself together while witnessing his first execution. In the King's eyes, he had brought shame to the Kang Kingdom and tarnished the family name.

It didn’t help that Taehyun was supposed to be married off soon, with today marking the first time he was set to meet his soon-to-be bride. Despite all he’d endured, he was expected to run the palace alongside a Queen, in hopes of moving past it all. Yet, Taehyun felt like he had never had a choice in the matter.

Standing before the mirror after donning his royal garments for the meeting, Taehyun’s reflection greeted him with nothing but a blank expression, swollen eyes, and a dead gaze. He couldn’t help but notice how incredibly lonely he looked. His eyes, once full of hope, were now empty, drained by the pain his father and the kingdom had inflicted on him since his childhood. His gaze fell to the insignia hanging around his neck, the weight of it reminding him how it wasn’t where it belonged: it should have been with you.

Taehyun found himself in a fit of laughter. Anyone listening in on him would’ve thought he was crazy. It was comical to him. You were the one who was dead, yet Taehyun felt like he was barely alive.

His laughter was cut short by someone tentatively entering his room. “Prince Taehyun, is everything alright?” Caught off guard, he sharply turned to face whoever had caught him in such a vulnerable state. Aggressive eyes turned soft, recognizing the keeper from the garden, Hueningkai, who helped him the day of your execution.

Taehyun stood up straight, his feigned prince persona taking over. “Yes, I’m alright. Thank you.” The keeper didn't look so convinced, and Taehyun could tell he had something more to say. “What is it, Kai?”

“Prince Taehyun,” he began once more, looking towards the floor. “Permission to speak truthfully?”

“Of course.”

“I don’t think you should become King.” Taehyun’s eyes narrowed at the words. He wasn’t joking when he said he wanted to be truthful. “I mean, you deserve better than this god-awful place,” the man continued, his voice tinged with genuine concern. “You shouldn’t have to put up with any of this. I knew your mother, and I know you. Both of you are better than this entire kingdom.”

Taehyun’s father had conditioned him early on to never show emotion in front of his subjects, but that was quite impossible now. He looked over at Kai as his eyes filled with salty tears. “You say that like I have a choice to be here.”

“But you do, my prince.” Kai risked taking a step closer to Taehyun, lowering his voice to but a whisper. “You should get out of here. I won’t tell anyone where you’ve gone. The princess of the Choi Kingdom will not be here for another hour. It's not a lot of time, but it should be just enough to leave without anyone noticing.”

“I don’t think I can—”

“Please, listen.” The keeper’s voice was urgent, and Taehyun couldn’t ignore the urgency in it. “They buried her in the woods with her parents.”

Taehyun’s heart dropped at the mention of you, someone he had been haunted by for weeks.

“I know you know where that is,” Hueningkai continued, his tone softer now. “Go see her. But after that… you have to leave. Get as far away from here as you can. You owe it to yourself.”

Taehyun opened his mouth to respond, but the gardener was already gone, slipping out of sight and disappearing down the hall before anyone could notice. Taehyun knew he had a narrow window of opportunity, and he couldn’t waste it. The mention of your name had lit a fire within him, the last push he needed. Without hesitation, he grabbed his cloak and, in a heartbeat, slipped outside the palace gates. This time, for good.

He reached the village in what felt like the blink of an eye. It was easy to lose track of time when his mind was racing, consumed with images of you. As he passed the old well and then your cottage, time seemed to slow even more—if that was possible. Painful memories surged through him, skewing his senses so intensely that he almost didn’t notice the guard standing motionless at the village border. When Taehyun finally saw him, he jumped, ducking behind a nearby shrub just in time to avoid being spotted.

Had the King really deployed guards into the village so soon? Taehyun distinctly remembered his father saying he would delegate this responsibility to him when the time came. Perfect timing, he thought, rolling his eyes. The King no longer trusted Taehyun with the power of the throne, and now, Taehyun was starting to believe that trust had vanished long before you ever did.

It was now or never, Taehyun finally decided. So, with a few confident strides, there he stood directly in front of the palace guard who sat with his back comfortably against the fence. An unfathomable rage lit inside of Taehyun when he recognized the guard as the same one who possessed your necklace the day you were executed. “Prince Tae-” the guard couldn’t get two words out as Taehyun curled his fist and sent it flying across the guard’s face, crushing his jaw and sending him bouncing against the fence. Taehyun didn’t waste another second, scaling the fence and easily reaching the top as he swung his leg over to the other side. His opposite foot was suddenly caught by the guard, who weakly held his bloodied face with his other hand. Summoning every ounce of energy and strength left in him, Taehyun kicked out, his foot slamming into the guard’s face and knocking him unconscious in an instant.

Taehyun jumped down from the fence, stumbling slightly as he hit the ground. Then, without hesitation, he ran. Ran until the chain-link fence was no longer visible behind him. This was it. He was no longer a prince, but a runaway, desperately searching through the forest for the place where his love had been buried. When the forest finally opened up, revealing a freshly filled grave with a small gravestone etched with your name, he knew he'd arrived.

The sight was beautiful yet tragic at the same time. The last time he was here with you, he hadn’t processed how the trees surrounding the graves blossomed with pretty pink flowers, casting a small shadow over the open area. The fallen petals decorated the dirt in a haunting yet mesmerizing way that drew him in towards your grave. He sank to his knees, his palms pressing into the dirt in front of the gravestone, his head hanging low against his chest. Before much passed, Taehyun broke down in a sob. His cries were deeper than the day you were taken from him, more anguished than when he learned of his mother’s death. He wept for himself, for the unbearable pain he had endured in his short life. He wept for the villagers, trapped in a cycle of fear under the kingdom’s oppressive rule.

Each tear spilled from his eyes, sliding down his cheek and falling toward the side of his nose, marking his sorrow.

It went on like this for several minutes, until one exceptionally large tear slipped from his eye, dripping down to his chin before falling onto the fresh dirt in front of your gravestone. For a moment, nothing happened. The world remained quiet except for the sound of his unsteady breaths. But then, a deep yet faint rumble stirred beneath him. At first, it was subtle, like a whisper beneath the earth. Taehyun barely registered it, too lost in his grief. Then, the tremors grew stronger. The ground beneath him trembled with an unnatural force. Loose soil scattered across the grave as a brilliant light erupted, swallowing the gravestone in its glow.

His head snapped up, confusion flickering across his tear-streaked face. The brightness was blinding, forcing him to lift an arm to shield his eyes as his heart hammered against his ribs. The vibration intensified, turning into a violent quake that had him stumbling back. The ground beneath him shook violently, and Taehyun stumbled to his feet. The persistent quaking sent him crashing into a nearby tree, his hands gripping its rough bark for balance as the tremors continued to rattle through the forest.

It was then that Taehyun remembered, all at once, the myth he had shared with you in this very spot—the legend that said only the tears of a deceased lover could bring them back for just a moment. His heart raced as the quaking earth beneath him seemed to affirm the ancient words. The gods had heard his sorrow, and they were giving him this one fleeting moment to be with you again. His life depended on it.

Still, he squinted ahead, unwilling to miss a single moment of what was about to unfold. The breeze swept through his hair as he slowly lowered his arm to his side. A small figure began to rise from the grave, drawing his curiosity in a way that tormented him. As the blinding light gradually dimmed and the brush cleared, his voice caught in his throat.

There you were, ascending from your grave in a way so angelic it stole the very air from his lungs. Taehyun approached with caution, his heart pounding in his chest, terrified that he was hallucinating. His eyes searched you, desperate to confirm the impossible.

You scanned the forest wildly, disoriented but taking in every detail around you. When your eyes finally locked on Taehyun, time seemed to freeze. He barely dared to breathe as he whispered your name, stepping into the cloud of smoke that surrounded you, “Is this really you?”

“T-Taehyun?” Your voice sounded dry and strangled when you choked out his name. But hearing you say anything at all made Taehyun smile. He stopped sharp short in his tracks, seeing a sharp blade protruding from the smoke, almost having walked directly into it. The closer he got to you, his heart sank as he recognized the sword protruding through your body, the same blade that had been driven through you during your execution. Despite the sight, he stepped carefully to one side of the sword, his hands trembling as he wrapped his arms around your waist above the blade. He pulled you gently against him, desperate for the touch he had longed for, feeling a rush of warmth as he held you once more.

“I'm so sorry,” Taehyun mumbled over and over into your hair.

“For what? You didn’t do this to me, Taehyun. This isn’t your fault.” You soothed him as best as you could, running your fingers gently through his hair that you missed so much. 

You were an apparition, a momentary gift from the gods birthed by the tears he shed, yet he could somehow hear you and feel your touch. You seemed so alive, except for the sword that remained wedged in the center of your body, absent of any blood.

Taehyun leaned in to kiss you, tasting you against his lips after what had seemed like forever. You tasted the salty tears that stained his face, making your own eyes swell up at the heartbreak you must’ve put him through.

You refused to pull away from each other, savoring the moment as your lips moved slowly together. He eventually glanced down at the sword and then back up to your eyes, which were still closed, lost in the memory of his kiss.

“Does it hurt?”

You looked down at the sword sticking out of your stomach and chuckled softly. “I can’t feel a thing.”

Taehyun felt a wave of relief wash over him, and he couldn’t help but kiss you again, his lips lingering on yours. As he pulled away, he bit down gently on your lower lip, a playful smile tugging at his features. He pressed his forehead against yours, a gesture he always cherished.

“I felt that, though,” you said, your voice light with laughter, and soon he joined you, the sound of your shared joy filling the air.

The laughter quickly faded, replaced by an ominous silence that hung between you, the sky dimming overhead. Neither of you wanted to say what was truly on your mind.

Taehyun was the first to speak, his voice hesitant as he tiptoed around the truth. “I can’t believe the legend was actually true.”

You swallowed hard, the words heavy in your chest. “I know,” you responded quietly, unwilling to delay the inevitable. “But that means we don’t have much time left together. I’ll have to leave soon.”

There are a hundred ways to leave a lover.

Taehyun had spent sleepless nights tormenting himself over each one, his mind cycling through every possibility. Abandonment, betrayal, indifference—all the ways people tear each other apart. But death… death was the most permanent of them all. Maybe that was why his father had used it so mercilessly against your family. It was a clean break, an irreversible punishment meant to sever ties forever.

But for Taehyun, it only solidified his resolve. He wouldn’t let the same fate tear the two of you apart. If death was how his father wanted to end things, then Taehyun would meet him on his own twisted terms.

If losing you was inevitable, then maybe surrendering himself to that same fate was the only way to feel whole again.

The thought had consumed him for weeks, festering like an open wound. Maybe everything he’d endured—every conflict, every lie, every stolen moment with you—had brought him to this very decision. With that unwavering determination, Taehyun took a step back from you, aligning the tip of the blade with his stomach as his hands reached behind you to grasp the sword’s hilt

“What the hell are you doing!?” Your hands flew on top of Taehyun’s in a panic, stopping him before he could make any crass decisions.

Hueningkai’s words echoed in Taehyun’s mind—about seeing you and then continuing with his journey—but Taehyun couldn’t bring himself to move forward. Not now, when he felt farther from the kingdom yet closer to you than he ever had before. Leaving you wasn’t an option.

“Don't,” he murmured, his hand gently caressing your face as tears slipped down both your cheeks. “It’s okay, my princess. We can spend an eternity together this way.”

Taehyun’s hands found the hilt of the sword again, his palms sweating as he met your gaze one last time. With a final, shared smile between you both, he shoved the sword back through your torso, piercing his own as it passed through you both.

Your bodies collided, flush against one another now, the blade connecting you in a final, agonizing bond.

You reached out, catching Taehyun against you as his blood seeped from his wound, staining both your clothes. Your arms wrapped around him, holding him steady as his hands pulled you closer, resting his head against your chest with the last of his strength.

You could feel the life draining from him, his weight growing heavier against you with each passing second.

"I love you forever," Taehyun managed, blood trickling out the corner of his mouth when he opened it to speak.

“I love you forever, Your Highness,” you replied sadly, feeling his heartbeat slowing against you. "I'll see you soon."

Eventually, your ghost vanished, leaving Taehyun lying alone atop your grave, motionless. Yet he still smiled, knowing he would see you on the other side. The kingdom was finally a thing of his past, and you would be his future.

tags: @dawngyu @fatbixchwithanopinion @hyunj00 @chubichubs @taebatu ㅤ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ reblogs and comments are always appreciated!

[itendtothinkalot]

strawberry ice cream

summary: taehyun’s never liked strawberry ice cream, but for five years, he’s pretended to, just to make you happy. one day, he finally confesses his feelings! trying to keep your cool, you’re struggling to handle the situation, but taehyun? he’s acting different, a little too confident for your own good. now, with his teasing, you’re not sure whether to be flustered or admit that maybe… you feel the same way.

genre: fluff!!! just all around fluff!

characters: best friend!taehyun x f!reader <333

words: 6.7k

warnings: none!!! i hope

Taehyun has dated before—many times, actually. He was smart, confident, and undeniably good-looking. Girls naturally gravitated toward him, drawn to his quiet charisma. And for the most part, he welcomed it. Dating was simple, effortless.

Until it wasn’t.

Because no matter how pretty, how kind, how perfect they seemed, something always felt… off. The spark that everyone talked about—the feeling that made people stay—it never lasted. He tried convincing himself it was normal, that love wasn’t supposed to feel like fireworks all the time. But deep down, he knew.

Love wasn’t supposed to feel like settling.

And maybe, just maybe, it was because of you.

The thought lingered at the back of his mind, unspoken but persistent, like a song stuck on repeat. You, his best friend. The one constant in his life. The one person he never had to impress. The one girl he never had to chase—because you were always there, smiling at him like he was just Taehyun, not someone to be won over.

And maybe that’s why it scared him so much.

Because if he admitted it—if he really let himself feel it—he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to go back to pretending.

—

“Here.” You handed him a cone of strawberry ice cream, your fingers brushing against his for a fleeting second.

Taehyun looked up at you, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “Thanks.”

The contrast between you two had always been apparent. Where you were all bright energy, he was quiet steadiness. You were the type to run headfirst into situations, heart first, no hesitation—while he was the one standing behind, arms crossed, sighing before inevitably following to make sure you didn’t do anything too reckless.

Even now, as you excitedly licked your ice cream, eyes crinkling in delight at the taste, he couldn’t help but think—you’re so easy to love.

He took a slow bite of his own. Strawberry ice cream. Not his favorite. Not even close.

But it was yours. And for some stupid, unexplainable reason, that made it taste better.

“Are you even enjoying that?” you teased, narrowing your eyes at him. “You always make this face when you eat strawberry ice cream, like you’re forcing yourself.”

Taehyun raised a brow, feigning innocence. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You rolled your eyes but grinned. “Sure. Whatever you say.” Then, without warning, you leaned in and took a playful bite out of his ice cream, giggling as you pulled back.

Taehyun stilled.

You didn’t even notice.

“See?” you hummed, licking the remnants from your lips. “Mine’s better.”

He swallowed. Hard.

It wasn’t the ice cream. It wasn’t the teasing. It was the way you did things so effortlessly, so casually—like stealing a bite of his ice cream was just normal between you two. Like it didn’t mean anything.

For you, it didn’t.

For him?

His grip on the cone tightened slightly.

You had no idea, did you? No idea how badly he wanted to close the space between you and wipe the ice cream off your lips with his thumb. No idea how every time you leaned in close, his brain short-circuited trying to act normal.

No idea that he’d spent years convincing himself he was just your best friend.

And he’d keep pretending.

Because that’s all he was allowed to be.

For now.

—

Taehyun barely reacted when you slammed the door behind you, though his grip on his phone tightened slightly. He already knew tonight wasn’t going to end well—the second Soobin had smugly announced that he was setting you up on a blind date, Taehyun had felt a distinct irritation settle in his chest. Not that he could say anything about it. Not that he had any right to.

Still, he couldn’t help but scowl internally at his friend’s meddling. 

His expression remained unreadable as you stomped into the apartment, throwing your shoes off with more force than necessary. You muttered an impressive string of curse words under your breath, arms crossed so tightly over your chest that he thought you might combust.

Then, with a dramatic sigh, you spotted him on the couch. Taehyun barely had time to process before you fell onto his lap, burying your face into his sweater as you threw your arms around him in a bone-crushing hug.

"Men are stupid," you declared, voice muffled against his chest.

Taehyun let out a breathless chuckle, adjusting to the sudden weight of you sprawled across him. "I mean, I won’t argue with you there," he said, keeping his tone light even though he was struggling to ignore just how close you were.

Your body was warm against his, your scent—something sweet, something unmistakably you—filling his senses. It wasn’t fair. How easily you curled into him like this. How naturally you sought comfort in him, never once realizing that he was part of the very problem you were complaining about.

"I take it that the date didn’t go well?" he asked, even though he already knew the answer.

You groaned dramatically, tightening your hold around him. "Disaster would be an understatement. First of all, he was late. Like—half an hour late! And then when he finally showed up, he spent the first ten minutes talking about his gym routine."

Taehyun hummed, resting his arm along the back of the couch as he definitely didn’t let his fingers linger in your hair. "Maybe he was nervous."

"Well, then he shouldn’t have tried mansplaining my own job to me."

Taehyun winced. "Yeah. That’s… rough."

Taehyun bit back a smile. God, you were adorable when you were ranting.

"Maybe Soobin should retire from matchmaking," he mused.

"Maybe Soobin should mind his own business," you muttered. Then, with a sigh, you dropped your head back against his shoulder, settling into him like he was the only place in the world that made sense. "It’s so unfair. Why is dating so hard?"

Taehyun stared at the ceiling. It doesn’t have to be.

But he didn’t say that.

Instead, he swallowed down the words, kept his arm loosely draped around you, and pretended like his heart wasn’t beating out of his chest.

Pretended like he wasn’t wishing, just this once, that you’d see him.

—

The two of you were having a conversation.

Well, mostly you were talking. Taehyun was listening, nodding every now and then, letting you ramble as he sipped his coffee.

“I just don’t get it,” you sighed, stirring your drink absentmindedly. “I mean, I want to be in a relationship. I really do. But it’s like—ugh, I don’t know, the moment I actually try, it never works out. Maybe I’m cursed. Or maybe my standards are just too high.”

Taehyun raised an eyebrow but said nothing, waiting for you to continue.

“Like, am I asking for too much? I just want someone who gets me, you know? Someone who actually listens when I talk, someone who doesn’t just nod and smile but really hears me. Someone who’s honest but not in a mean way, who calls me out when I’m being dumb but still sticks around anyway.”

Taehyun hummed. “That’s… oddly specific.”

“Right?” you huffed. “It’s so hard to find.”

Before Taehyun could even think of a response, a shadow fell over the table.

“Hey, I’m Yeonjun,” a smooth voice cut in.

Both of you glanced up at the guy standing next to your table—tall, sharp-featured, and clearly confident in his approach.

“I was with my friends and I just had to come over and tell you that I find you really cute,” he said, flashing you an easy grin.

You blinked at him, lips parting slightly in surprise before you shrugged. “Oh. Thanks.”

And just like that, you turned back to Taehyun, picking up right where you left off. “Anyway, like I was saying—”

Taehyun’s brow furrowed. He stared at you, then at Yeonjun—who was still standing there, slightly thrown off—before the guy awkwardly excused himself and walked away.

Taehyun narrowed his eyes at you. “That guy was flirting with you.”

You glanced over your shoulder, barely sparing Yeonjun another look. “Yeah. And?”

Taehyun frowned. “You keep saying you want to be in a relationship, but when cute guys approach you, you never seem to care.”

You turned to him, meeting his gaze dead-on. “That’s because none of them seem to know me. Not the way you do.”

Taehyun stilled.

You leaned in slightly, voice quieter but firm. “None of them treat me the way you do. What I want is… something we have.”

For the first time in a long time, Taehyun didn’t know what to say. His grip tightened around his coffee cup, his pulse suddenly too loud in his ears.

Because if you meant what he thought you meant—

Oh.

Oh.

Taehyun’s voice was quieter now, more cautious. “That’s because we’re best friends. Of course I know you. That’s... that’s how it is.”

There it was—the wall he built, the familiar, comforting excuse. He was doing what he always did—masking—keeping things light, brushing away the vulnerability that had sparked in him just a moment ago.

But he could’ve sworn he saw a flicker in your eyes.

Your expression changed for the briefest moment. A small tightening of your lips, a flash of something unreadable, almost like you were disappointed. But then, as quickly as it came, it was gone.

You nodded, a little too enthusiastically. “Of course, we’re best friends. That’s what we are.”

It almost felt rehearsed, the way you smiled so brightly, almost like you were trying to convince yourself of it. But Taehyun couldn’t be sure. Was it just him, or was there a shift in the air between you two now? Something that hadn’t been there before.

"Yeah," he replied softly, but the words felt heavier now, lingering in the space between you. “Yeah. Best friends.”

But in his chest, the tightness wouldn't loosen. It wasn’t supposed to feel this complicated, was it? Best friends didn’t look at each other this way, didn’t feel their heartbeats quicken when the other spoke.

He wiped his palms on his jeans, looking anywhere but at you.

You, on the other hand, were too calm. Too nonchalant. Like this wasn’t the most loaded conversation you’d ever had with him.

You leaned back in your chair, your legs crossed casually, as if you hadn’t just dropped a bomb on his chest. “I mean,” you started, your voice sweet, like the conversation had just shifted into another territory entirely. “I am lucky to have someone who gets me like you do.”

But that was the problem, wasn’t it? Taehyun didn’t want to just be someone who got you.

He wanted to be the one who had you.

His thoughts were moving faster than his words. God, what was he supposed to do now? He couldn’t take it back, couldn’t unfeel what he was feeling. And by the way you were looking at him right now—so utterly unaware of the weight of your words—he knew it wasn’t something you were going to suddenly realize.

He sighed, trying to laugh it off. “Well, that’s what best friends are for, right?” He almost hated how forced it sounded. How untrue.

The air between you both felt impossibly thick.

You didn’t say anything right away. Instead, you just smiled again, but it was a different kind of smile this time. One that didn’t quite reach your eyes.

“Yeah, of course,” you said, almost too softly.

And just like that, the moment shifted—slipped through Taehyun’s fingers, leaving only a quiet, unbearable ache in his chest.

But he didn’t say anything. He couldn’t. Not yet.

—

Taehyun stared at the glow of his phone screen, his mind racing, unable to shake the thought that had been nagging him ever since that conversation. Could it be? No, he must be crazy. There’s no way. You were so out of his league, otherworldly even. And he... was just Taehyun.

But that one flicker of a change in your expression kept replaying in his mind, like an echo he couldn’t silence. The way you’d paused, the hesitation that flashed in your eyes. It felt like something had almost been said, but you’d stopped yourself.

He didn’t know what to do with it. He couldn’t stop thinking about it.

In a moment of desperation, his thumb hovered over the keyboard, and before he could talk himself out of it, he typed: “how to know if a girl likes you?”

He hit search and scrolled through a few websites, the information flooding in with no filter.

“Sign 1: She initiates skin contact.”

Taehyun scoffed under his breath, thinking of all the little moments. Like when you’d casually rest your hand on his arm while laughing, or when you’d bump his shoulder whenever you wanted his attention. Sometimes it was the lightest touch, like when you’d accidentally brush his fingers when handing him something, but it always felt deliberate.

He groaned, covering his face with his hand. No way. It couldn't mean what he thought it meant, could it? 

He scrolled further.

“Sign 2: She confides in you about everything.”

Taehyun's mind immediately went to the way you’d always come to him with the most trivial, random things. From a bad day at work to maybe how you felt during a meeting. You told him everything, like you trusted him more than anyone else, like you couldn’t imagine telling anyone else first.

You always confided in him with a smile, always sought his opinion, even on things as silly as what kind of ice cream to get, or what outfit to wear on a date.

His heart skipped.

Sign 3: She constantly teases you.

Taehyun felt a soft blush creep up his neck. He couldn’t help but think of the countless moments you’d teased him. The way you loved to poke fun at his serious demeanor or the silly nicknames you’d give him just to make him laugh. You always seemed to have this way of keeping him on edge, teasing him just enough to make his heart race.

Even that one time when you’d cornered him with a playful grin, saying, “You know, for someone so smart, you’re so clueless about people.”

He could hear your voice in his head, that playful tone, that mischievous glint in your eye.

Taehyun blinked, pulling his phone back from his face and staring at the screen in disbelief. 

All these signs—these signs—they were all things you’d done. He’d never even thought about it before, too focused on the fact that you were his best friend, his person.

But now? Now it felt like something had shifted in his mind, the gears grinding and clicking into place.

A sudden panic flooded his chest. What if you did like him? What if you always had?

His thumb hovered over his phone screen again, as though he might text you right this second and ask. But then the overwhelming thought hit him: What if he was wrong? What if he misread everything? What if this ruins everything?

He tossed his phone on the bed beside him and buried his face in his pillow, groaning into it. He wasn’t ready for this. He wasn’t ready to know if he was about to lose the only thing that mattered most to him.

But one thing was clear now: He couldn’t just ignore this feeling anymore. 

And that made him, well, confident.

—

Taehyun felt the strange urge building up inside him—something he couldn’t shake off, no matter how many times he tried to distract himself. He wanted to know, needed to know. He hesitated at your bedroom door, then, taking a deep breath, he knocked.

You groggily opened the door, stretching as you yawned. "Taehyun?" you asked, your voice still laced with sleep. He couldn’t help but notice the way your hair was messily falling over your face, the way your eyes still held traces of sleep. To him, you always looked beautiful, no matter the time of day.

"I have a question for you," Taehyun said, his voice calm. "Do you like me?"

You blinked, still half-asleep, trying to process what he just said. "What?" you muttered, rubbing your eyes.

He stepped closer, his eyes focused on you with an intensity you couldn’t quite understand. “Do you like me?” he repeated, his voice unwavering. This time, his eyes were serious, and the playful tone that usually accompanied his words was gone. Your pulse quickened, and you instinctively took a step back, but Taehyun followed, his presence too close for comfort. You stumbled slightly, your knees hitting the bed as you ended up sitting on it.

“Do you like me?” Taehyun asked again, his voice low and steady, as though he was studying your every movement, every tiny flicker of emotion that passed across your face. He leaned in just slightly, watching the way your breath hitched, how you nervously avoided his gaze. There was something almost intoxicating about the way you looked flustered in front of him, and it made his heart race.

You gulped, feeling your face grow hot. His gaze was too intense, too penetrating, and suddenly, the room felt a lot smaller.

“Taehyun... what are you talking about?” You forced out the words, trying to sound unaffected, but even to your own ears, your voice wavered. Taehyun tilted his head slightly, watching you closely.

"I'm just asking a question." He smiled faintly, as if this was all normal to him. "That day, when you said you wanted to date someone who knows you… isn't that me?"

Your heart skipped a beat. "It could just mean someone like you," you stammered, trying to play it cool, but you could feel the heat rising in your cheeks.

"Hmm." Taehyun raised an eyebrow, his lips curling up slightly. “Could mean that. But it could also mean something else.”

You swallowed hard. "Mean what?" you asked, doing your best to hide the nervousness bubbling up inside you. You were trying so hard to act casual, but everything inside you was screaming otherwise.

"That you like me," he said, his voice almost teasing now, but there was something deeper in his eyes that made your stomach flutter.

You scoffed, a nervous laugh escaping your lips. "Pfft. I always knew you were smart, I didn’t think you’d be funny too." You tried to brush it off, but your heart wasn’t in it. Taehyun’s gaze never left you, and his smile only grew, his eyes sparkling with something you couldn’t quite decipher.

"Okay. Fine." He said, his tone shifting again, this time more serious, almost playful in a way that made you want to melt. "When you do find the perfect guy, be sure to let me know. Because I want to be ready, to prepare myself for the heartbreak of seeing the person I love fall for someone else."

You stood there in complete shock, unable to process what he’d just said. Your mouth opened, but no words came out. You couldn’t say anything. Taehyun chuckled softly, standing up, but not without giving you one last lingering look.

“And also... you didn’t really answer my question,” he added with a teasing smile, turning toward the door.

Taehyun didn’t get a confession out of you but somehow he found something greater. Confidence. 

—

You woke up, uncomfortable. You could still feel the warmth of Taehyun’s words echoing in your mind, and you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had changed. You didn’t want to face him—not yet, not when things were so weird between you. So you stayed in your room, lying in bed, hoping he’d leave for a while so you could avoid the inevitable awkwardness.

You finally summoned the courage to get out of bed, dragging yourself to the kitchen for breakfast, hoping for a quick escape. You pushed the door open, only to freeze in your tracks when you saw Taehyun leaning casually against the counter, a glass of water in hand. His messy hair and sleepy eyes made it all the harder to ignore the strange rush of emotions in your chest.

You tried to turn around without saying a word, but as you moved toward the door, his voice stopped you in your tracks.

“Hey,” Taehyun called, his tone light but laced with an unmistakable playfulness. You didn’t even look at him as you slowly turned back to face him.

“I’m not gonna bite,” he continued, his gaze catching yours for just a moment before you quickly darted your eyes elsewhere. “You can get some breakfast. I can go if you want.”

He let out a quiet laugh, clearly enjoying the effect he had on you, even if he didn’t admit it. You could practically hear the smirk in his voice, and it made your cheeks heat up.

There was something different about the way he presented himself, almost as if he was trying to win an argument. Taehyun seemed different—almost too confident, as if he had finally come into his own.

You shifted your weight awkwardly, trying to find the words to fill the silence, but they didn’t come. Instead, you muttered, “It’s fine.”

Taehyun watched you, that knowing glint never leaving his eyes. He knew exactly what he was doing, and he knew it was messing with your head. It didn’t help that his relaxed stance seemed to suggest that he wasn’t bothered by the tension between you at all, while you felt like you were unraveling inside.

With a slight tilt of his head, he added, “Come on, you’re not gonna make me stand here all alone, are you?”

You didn’t trust yourself to speak, so you just nodded, moving past him to grab something for breakfast. Taehyun didn’t make a move to leave. Instead, he leaned back against the counter again, watching you closely, waiting for you to crack under the pressure.

You could feel his eyes on you, and you tried your best to pretend that everything was fine. 

“Look, if it makes you feel better, I can just pretend I didn’t say anything,” Taehyun said, casually leaning back against the counter. “Besides, I’m the one who said I liked you. Why are you acting like you got rejected?”

He let out a soft laugh, one that made you feel both at ease and completely on edge at the same time. The teasing tone in his voice only made the situation harder to navigate. How was it so easy for him? Why couldn’t you just tell him how you felt?

“I’m gonna go shower and head over to Soobin’s,” Taehyun continued, his voice light, but there was that quiet undercurrent of something else. “You can have the rest of the house to yourself.”

He moved to turn, but before he could, you blurted out, “No!”

The word slipped out of your mouth before you could stop it. You froze, the heat in your face betraying the chaos inside your mind. Why did you even say that?

Taehyun paused, his back still turned to you, but his posture stiffened slightly, as if he’d expected more of a reaction but didn’t expect this one. He turned back to look at you, but your gaze immediately dropped to the floor, not daring to meet his.

For a moment, there was silence between you. Your brain was screaming for you to say something—anything—that could explain the rush of emotions that had flooded you in the span of a few seconds. But every time you opened your mouth, the words seemed to get stuck somewhere deep inside.

Taehyun, sensing your hesitation, raised an eyebrow, the faintest smirk curling at the corners of his lips. “What? You want me to stay?”

You opened your mouth again, but nothing came out. You were completely at a loss for words, your heart pounding in your chest, knowing that anything you said could ruin whatever fragile understanding you two had left.

So, instead, you stayed silent. Your mind raced as your thoughts collided with each other, all those things you wished you could say, but couldn’t seem to get past your lips. Taehyun was waiting for you to speak, but you couldn’t.

He sighed softly, almost as if he was amused by the effect he had on you. “You know,” he said, voice quieter this time, “I’m not gonna make it easy for you.”

With that, he turned around leaving you standing there, heart in your throat, unable to move.

—

As Taehyun drove over to Soobin’s, his mind couldn’t stop replaying the conversation from moments earlier. Five years. Five whole years. It had been that long since his feelings for you had started, slowly growing, deepening until they became something undeniable. But for all that time, he’d kept them buried, locked away behind advice, words of wisdom and a friendship that was too comfortable to risk.

He had watched you date other people, listened to you vent about your blind dates, your crushes, and your frustrations. And all the while, he had stayed by your side, always the supportive friend, the one who would laugh with you, talk to you about anything, and pretend that nothing was wrong when his heart ached with each passing day.

But today? Today was different. Seeing you crack under the pressure of his directness, your vulnerability laid bare—it had done something to him. The power he felt now, as if he held some control over your emotions, was both exhilarating and terrifying.

You were always so strong, so in control of yourself, never letting your guard down. But for the first time, he saw something shift in you. Something that made his heart race with anticipation. And what’s more, it was cute. Really cute. How you tried to act like everything was fine, like you weren’t completely freaking out inside, but he could see it in your eyes, in the way your hands fidgeted, how your voice wavered just slightly when you spoke.

And for the first time, he wasn’t angry with himself for not telling you sooner. He wasn’t frustrated with the years of yearning. In fact, it felt almost... right, in a strange way. Maybe he’d always had to wait, maybe he had to be patient, but he was willing to.

He didn’t care if you didn’t see it yet, or if you were too nervous to admit what he could already see. He knew that one day, you’d come to him. And when that day came, he would be there, ready to make you see him the way he’d always seen you.

For now, though, he was content to wait. To let you work through whatever you were feeling. He didn’t need you to have it all figured out right now.

He’d wait for you. And when you were ready, he’d be right here, as he always had been.

—

It was 12am and Taehyun was still out.

You couldn’t understand it. One moment, you were his annoying best friend who had ran through every bad decision in your head. You were a confident person who could face your feelings for Taehyun, and the next thing you knew…it was as if the ground had been ripped from under you. The fear of losing him, the uncertainty, the possibility of ruining the one thing that had always been so solid in your life.

As you paced around the house, your thoughts spiraled, each one more dramatic than the last. Did you scare him off? What if you ruined everything? What if this changes you two forever? The thought of losing Taehyun, not just as a friend but as someone who meant so much more to you, made your chest ache.

And yet, there you were, throwing your phone across the couch, staring at the screen, wondering what you could say, how you could fix it. You were terrified of the silence between you, terrified of confronting what you knew deep down: that you loved him.

Your mind was racing, and just as you were about to call him, the sound of the door creaking open pulled you from your thoughts. You froze, heart pounding as you looked up. There he was.

“Still awake?” he asked, surprised, his eyes flickering over to you. You didn’t know how to respond, your words stuck in your throat..

You nodded in silence, and then it hit you—the familiar feeling of him looking at you, noticing everything, like you were the most important thing in his world. The way he could see through you, the way he knew exactly what you were feeling, even when you couldn’t find the words to express it.

“Good. I bought us supper,” Taehyun smiled, and for a brief moment, everything felt normal again.

You looked over at the bag of food in his hands, and your heart fluttered. Of course, he got your favorite... How did he always know? You could never hide anything from him. He placed the food on the table, the sound of it all grounding you, bringing you back to the present.

“C’mon. I know you haven’t eaten,” he said, that familiar teasing tone in his voice.

How did he know?

Before you could stop yourself, you instinctively responded, “Yes, I have,” your pride rising to the surface.

Then, of course, your stomach grumbled loudly, betraying you.

Taehyun’s eyes flickered to you, his lips twitching into a smile. “Cute,” he mumbled under his breath, shaking his head in amusement. He prepared the food again.

You froze, your mind spinning. The word "cute" etched in the back of your mind. You had felt the warmth of his gaze before, the way he always seemed to see right through you, but this time, it felt different. It felt like he had just peeled away another layer of you, one that you hadn’t even realized was there.

You tried to steady your breath, but it was no use. The butterflies in your stomach had already taken flight, fluttering wildly.

You cleared your throat, “You know you can’t just throw those words out like that,” you said, but there was no conviction in your voice. It was barely a whisper.

Taehyun didn’t even look up, still focused on making the food. It was like he didn’t even realize the effect he was having on you. How could he not see it? The way his every word made your heart race, the way the mere sound of his voice seemed to leave you in a haze.

"What word?" he asked, acting so nonchalant, so... Taehyun. He was always this way—unbothered, like he wasn’t aware of the way he could turn your world upside down with just one glance.

You wanted to backpedal, to change the subject. But you couldn’t. "You know..." You trailed off, not sure how to say it. You didn’t even know if you could say it without completely falling apart.

Taehyun's eyes flicked up to you briefly. “Oh, you mean ‘cute’?” he said, almost as if it was the most natural thing in the world. “But it’s the truth.”

The truth.

And there it was again. That word. The way he said it, so effortlessly, as though he didn’t understand the whirlwind he was creating inside you. The butterflies, the shivers running down your spine. The realization that he wasn’t just teasing you. He meant it.

This time, it wasn’t hunger. It was a rush of emotions, all tied up in those three little letters—cute. Your heart skipped a beat, then raced to catch up. You couldn’t stop the smile that tugged at your lips, but it wasn’t enough to hide how you felt.

You turned away for a moment, hoping he wouldn’t notice how flustered you were. But the heat on your cheeks gave it away, and you could feel his gaze on you, as if he knew exactly what he had done.

Your mind was a jumble of thoughts, your feelings all tangled up in confusion and longing. Was he teasing you? Or was it something more? Something real? Something you couldn’t name but knew, deep down, you were desperate to understand.

You swallowed hard, trying to compose yourself, but Taehyun had already caught you off guard.

You stood there, your heart hammering in your chest, every breath you took feeling shallow as you tried to keep your composure. But, the more Taehyun’s gaze held yours, the more your resolve began to waver. He had always been the one to make you feel safe, to make everything feel easy, but this... this was different. 

You shook your head, trying to ignore the storm of emotions swirling inside you. “You... you can’t just drop that you’re in love with me and pretend that everything’s okay,” you blurted out.

Taehyun raised his eyebrows, a soft chuckle escaping his lips. “Oh, we’re finally gonna talk about it?” he asked, clearly amused by your sudden outburst. “Sure, let’s talk about it.”

You huffed, frustration bubbling inside you. You crossed your arms over your chest, pacing back and forth in front of him, your hands gesturing wildly as you tried to explain everything that had been running through your mind. “You... you can’t just tell me you like me when I wake up from a good nap. I—I can’t think straight! And now, I can’t even look at you without feeling... without feeling stupid!” You stopped in front of him, hands on your hips, face flushed with embarrassment. “It’s so embarrassing, and it’s just... it’s so stupid. I can’t even talk, or form sentences, or—ugh—why are you doing this to me?!”

Before you could rant any further, Taehyun interrupted, his voice low but teasing, his lips curling into a smile. “Stupid?” he asked, the amusement in his eyes clear as he took a small step toward you. “That’s how I feel every time I hang around you.”

You blinked, your frustration melting into confusion. Taehyun continued, unfazed. “The guys always ask me why I’m so quiet around you, why I let you do all the talking. And... well, they don’t know that it’s because I love listening to you. You don’t even know this, but I could listen to you talk all day. I’m just as talkative as you are with my friends, but with you...” He stepped even closer now, his voice softening, “...with you, I can’t think straight. I can’t breathe clearly. I just—I can’t do anything.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but Taehyun cut you off, his voice growing more sincere. “You think you have it hard? I’ve been in love with you for five years. I’ve been pretending to be as quiet as I am for five years. And I’ve been pretending to like strawberry ice cream for five years. That’s how long I’ve been in love with you.”

You stood there, speechless. Every word he spoke made your heart twist, and yet, somehow, your mind was still stuck on the number five. Five years.

“F-five years?” You were still trying to process the gravity of it all, but Taehyun wasn’t giving you time to think.

He closed the distance between you. His hands rose slowly, his fingers gently cupping your face, his touch sending electricity coursing through your skin. The moment his palms made contact, your breath hitched, and your heart seemed to stutter in your chest.

“Yes,” Taehyun murmured, his voice barely audible as he leaned in a fraction closer. “Five. Years.” He didn’t move away.

You looked up at him, your mind a chaotic mess of thoughts and feelings. 

You felt it, though. The yearning in his eyes, the sweetness in his words, and the vulnerability that was now spilling from both of you. You had been afraid of this—afraid of the risk, of the fear of losing what you already had. But now, standing here in front of him, you knew.

And for the first time in your life, you didn’t want to run away.

Your voice trembled as you looked into his eyes, your heart racing. “What... what are we supposed to do now?”

Taehyun’s hands remained on your cheeks, his thumb gently caressing your skin as he leaned in just a little closer, his breath mixing with yours. “What do you want to do?” he asked softly, his lips brushing against your forehead as he closed his eyes for a brief moment.

You could feel the warmth of his words deep inside, the hope, the love, the honesty—and suddenly, everything else faded away. There was no need for anything more than this moment. Just him. Just you.

You swallowed, the words you had been holding back now slipping past your lips, “I... I want you to stay.”

Taehyun’s lips curled into a subtle smirk as he leaned in just enough for you to feel the warmth of his breath. His eyes sparkled with a mix of amusement and something deeper that you weren’t sure how to name. His playful tone contrasted the intensity of the moment.

"You asked," he said, his voice low and teasing, making your heart race, "and I’m staying."

You bit your lower lip, still unsure if you were more embarrassed or thrilled by how easily he’d taken control of the situation. The power he exuded made you feel small in the best way, a shift you weren’t used to but secretly relished.

You pouted, crossing your arms and looking away, trying to hold onto some semblance of your usual confident self. "You’re really enjoying this, aren’t you?"

Taehyun chuckled, his eyes softening as he stepped closer, his hand brushing your cheek in a surprisingly tender gesture. "Maybe," he teased, leaning in so close you could feel the tension between you. "But I’m enjoying this even more... watching you try to act all tough while you want nothing more than for me to stay."

You stifled a smile, trying to look away, but you couldn’t help the flush creeping up your neck. This whole new side of him, the one that was so sure of himself, was doing things to your insides you couldn’t quite explain.

"Stop looking at me like that," you muttered, but there was a softness in your voice that betrayed your words.

"Like what?" Taehyun asked, his voice dangerously close, and you could feel the teasing grin in his words even if he wasn’t smiling.

"Like you... you know you own me now," you finally admitted, your voice barely above a whisper, the words slipping out before you could stop them.

Taehyun’s smirk deepened, his fingers gently lifting your chin so that your eyes locked with his. There was something about the way he was looking at you now, something raw and sincere beneath the teasing, that made your heart flutter wildly.

“You’re the one who wanted me to stay,” he said softly, his voice low and soothing as he leaned in just enough that you could feel the heat of his breath. “You’re the one who asked. And now,” he paused, his hand slipping to your waist, pulling you ever so slightly closer, “now, you’ve got me.”

“You’re too smug,” you muttered, but there was no real heat in your words—only a soft, shy vulnerability that you couldn’t quite hide.

“You like it,” he whispered, his thumb brushing the curve of your jaw. “Admit it.”

You swallowed, your heart racing faster. “I—I don’t know what you're talking about,” you stammered, your voice betraying you.

“Of course you do,” Taehyun said, his lips brushing against your forehead in a soft, almost possessive kiss. “You’re just trying to act tough, but I can tell. I can tell you like this side of me. The one who knows exactly what he wants.” He leaned in just enough for you to feel his breath against your ear, making every part of your skin tingle. “And I think I want you to feel just how much I want you.”

“I—” You couldn’t even form the words to reply, too lost in the moment, too lost in the pull he had on you.

Taehyun’s smile softened, his fingers brushing your cheek once more before he pulled back, just enough to see the effect he had on you. “Don’t worry,” he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper, “I’m not going anywhere.”

[kumabeom]

you’re losing me - beomgyu

summary : beomgyu lost the love of his life. because of his own actions

wc: 1.5k, beomgyu x reader, taehyun x reader, beomie isn’t a good person, cheating

you didn’t expect it at all. two days without your boyfriend. your clingy boyfriend, the same man who claimed he couldn’t go two hours without you. and it wasn’t like anything was holding you back. if you remembered correctly, you visited him in the morning just a day ago, knocking on the door and being met with no response. just a worrying silence befalling the atmosphere around you.

no messages. no calls. nothing.

and just now, he was returning to your home like nothing happened. a small greeting falling from his lips before deciding to wrap his arms around you and join you on the couch to watch some movie. he didn’t say anything, not even when you asked him about what happened. lies splurging from his mouth. something about work and needing to work overtime. not even bothering to explain why he hadn’t even picked up the phone. instead he just— laid there with you. and you accepted it. you accepted the way that he was being distant.

meaning that beomgyu wasn’t going to change his ways.

why would he? if he didn’t face any consequences, there was no reason to change his behavior.

so when you went 4 nights without hearing a single word from your lover. small lettering under your messages that read, “read”. you shrugged it off, knowing that he was at least a bit safe. and even though it seemed like you were keeping a strong and confident act, you felt your heart beginning to chip away. small empty holes with nothing to fill them up with. the joy that you once felt from seeing beomgyu started to dissipate.

but it was always okay in the end.

he eventually came around. whether it took a week or longer.

his absence became more.. consistent.

two days without beomgyu turned into five days. which eventually turned into weeks.

but as long as the warmth that emitted from his chest was against you at some point. you felt like you had no right to complain.

even if he was posting on instagram actively, reading your messages, but never giving a response.

sweet whispers of promises being softly spoken in your ear, promises that he’d make up all the time lost to you on some lavish date night. one where he promised to spend all night committing himself and his time to you.

but when that night came. ten minutes turned into twenty. which somehow became an hour. the waiter’s pity filled glare eventually brought you to your senses. leaving a bill at the table and packing your things up, leaving. exiting the stupidly luxurious restaurant. the ridiculously overpriced dress that you had on was ripped off and replaced with the comfortable pajamas that you found lying around your home.

when beomgyu showed up the next day, he didn’t even mention the date the two of you had set the day before. showing up like nothing had happened. the man who once cared so much about you, was now gone. the loving stares that you were used to being met with were replaced with cold shoulders.

small gestures that beomgyu used to show you as an act of love were all gone. he no longer took the time to spare time for your weekly movie night. he never offered to do you the small, yet irritable chores that you hated doing. he no longer let you wake up to the smell of a sweet breakfast. the small actions of affection were so rare to fall victim to.

the lack of small kisses splattered all over your body, no longer experiencing the slight electric sensation that caused you to become absolutely flustered. the two of you rarely ever went on a date, and when you did, it was after spending hours waiting for him to even remember to show up.

you couldn’t help but wonder if beomgyu had been cheating on you. the sudden excuses to leave after he took a singular look at his phone.

the weird messages that he would get that yelled out loud to you. flirty little pick up lines showing up on the screen of his phone. sudden “work meetings” coming up out of nowhere.

so when you asked beomgyu to meet you at your apartment, he didn’t really know what to expect. you had stuck by his side for months, he knew he had you wrapped around his finger. he showed up hours later than you had asked him to, even though you expected it. that hadn’t meant that it didn’t hurt any less. tears dripping down your face. quivering bottom lip tucked by your upper teeth. the feeling of pain spreading through your body.

attempting to discard of your tears as beomgyu popped into your apartment. no words being exchanged to comfort you, he could tell you’d been crying, but usually when he saw you crying, you usually came around. because for some reason. you always came back to him. his lack of effort in the relationship, yet you always came back to him. to the cold atmosphere that he now set between the two of you.

“i think we should break up..” you muttered, glossy eyes looking down.

“why?” was all he could say. he never thought he’d feel it. he never thought he could feel the amount of anxiety that currently felt like it was piercing his heart. he was immune to it. at least that’s what he thought.

“this relationship is so one sided..” beomgyu immediately knew what you were talking about. the way you had spent restless nights wondering if he was ever going to make it home. the amount of times that your calls went straight to voicemail as you wondered if he was ever going to show up to what the two of you had planned.

“okay.” it angered you even more to see that beomgyu had no kind of argument against your decision. did he really want nothing to do with you. had he been cheating on you, and was he waiting for this opportunity to appear, so that he could leave a suffocating relationship.

he really didn’t love you. you believed it. you truly believed it. he silently walked off, leaving you alone in a weeping state. sobs falling from your mouth, translucent tears streaming down your face. soaking in sorrowful tears, basking in a weeping pity full mess.

it took you a while.

a while to stop mourning over the absence of someone so important to you. to realize that you had no reason to care for a relationship that was only ever one sided. but eventually, you were convinced. convinced that you were over beomgyu and his rather toxic habits.

beomgyu thought that it would’ve been easy. if he didn’t give any effort into a relationship, then surely it wouldn’t have bothered him to move on.

either way, beomgyu had been talking to someone. he wouldn’t consider it cheating. there were no romantic acts involved. except for the occasional kissing, sleepy nights spent together, cute small dates planned together. all while you were bawling your eyes out.

so why was it? why was it that beomgyu found himself thinking about you while still with his newfound lover. the person he claimed would save him from his horrible relationship. he often thought about the way that he was the reason for everything going wrong. you always tried. but he never did.

beomgyu still lurked around and would often times see what you posted on social media. small, indirect quotes targeted towards him. music lyrics indirectly describing your heartbroken state. but one day. he noticed that it all changed.

happy song lyrics.

cute emojis posted with outdoor pictures.

happy lyrics slowly turning into more loving, romantic wording.

posting pictures of two items. out getting coffee ? there were always two coffees. out getting ice cream? there were always two cones.

pictures of the largest and most beautiful bouquets being displayed.

a kiss mark on the back of someone’s hand.

two hands grasped together.

“happy one year anniversary my love <3.”

those words stuck out to beomgyu like a sore thumb. and when the story disappeared on his screen, he clicked on your profile once again. leading him to the screen he was just at. noticing that your lips were directly placed on taehyun’s cheek. his friend. his own friend.

two years after the two of you broke up. and now it was your one year anniversary with taehyun.

beomgyu could get mad as much as he wanted. but at the end of the day— it was his fault. it was always his fault.

it was his fault that he changed, that he started cheating. finding joy in such a forbidden way. leaving you stranded with no one to help you.

and when someone did help you.

he was angry. angry that taehyun did what he couldn’t. upset over the fact that taehyun had his hands on something that was once his.

taehyun had your love.

something that beomgyu had. until he selfishly threw away your relationship for his own pleasure.

©️kumabeom

permanent taglist : @run2seob @soobadooba @mrsyawnzzn @matcha-binz @tinyelfperson @strwbrrykthv @bloomngspring @bamgeutori (send asks !!)

[blue-jisungs]

okay so tae + blanket and I was thinking abt how he slept in an extra hour in the new to do x txt spinoff and then even when he woke up he just sat there for a few mins slowly blinking his eyes open RKJFKSS HES SO CUTE anyway him being clingy in the morning and not wanting to get out of bed :((

⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚ LAZY DAYS OFF🧸ྀི — sleepy taehyunnie <3 ( wc 585 )

ੈ✩‧₊˚ note ! HIYA ZANNIE ! sorry its so short :( but i hope u like this:(( i also strayed off a lil but but sleepy cozy fluffy tae:((((((((((((((( what if i just cry.

@kstrucknet

the bed is warm and fluffy, like a softest cloud. 

with a quiet groan your fingers look for the edge of the blanket and you pull it over your shoulders, not wanting any warmth to escape. 

this sheer feeling of comfort is enough to lull you back into sleep. 

suddenly, there’s an extra weight on you. not too strong, yet it was enough to crack your eye open.

in an instant you were met with an adorable sight: taehyun’s face squished onto your shoulder, his cheeks puffed slightly. it was his arm that you felt - he threw it across your waist, as if holding a plushie. his dark brown hair was shuffled from all the moving in his sleep, locks long enough to cover his closed eyes. 

despite the cold temperature outside and snow blazing, the warm sunlight peeks through the window, leaving a morning glow on his face. 

you can’t control the way your hand travelled to cup his cheek, causing his lips to pout from the subtle squishing. you just grinned and stared at taehyun’s sleeping face. 

your heart was at ease, seeing him like that. knowing that he’s resting – safely and next to you. it did feel a little strange to have him besides you while waking up, only because you were so used to the hastle and bustle of his busy life. 

you felt his fingers brushing against your side, drawing a giggle from you. 

“what’s so funny…” taehyun mumbled, not caring to open his eyes just yet. 

“you tickled me” you hummed and felt his lips forming into a mischievous smirk under your palm. “don’t even think about it” 

taehyun just fixed his hold and now his fingers wrapped around your side fully, pulling you closer. not knowing from where, his other hand came and landed at the back of your head. now you were fully nuzzled into his chest, your hair tickling his chin. 

“you’re just like a personal teddy bear, you know?” he murmured, voice a bit raspy from slumber. you just scoffed and fixed the blanket, closing your eyes.

“i figured” 

taehyun peeked an eye open and frowned. 

“wait, actually, i don’t like this position…” he sighed and shuffled again, dragging you along. 

“but i was getting cozy…” you whined when for a moment the covers slipped off. the coldness of the room made you shiver dramatically. 

“here we go” he purred with satisfaction, like a cat receiving chin scratches. 

now you were laying on his chest, his hands still glued to you. 

“i can see you a little better. that was what i needed, really” he hummed and brought the blanket over to your neck. 

you sighed softly, turning to his side and wrapping your hand around his torso. throwing your leg on his, you nuzzled even closer. not a single space between your bodies.

“i wish we could stay like this forever” he slurred sleepily and you weren’t sure if he’s not gonna drift away again any second now. 

“who said we have to get up?” you asked quietly. 

taehyun stayed silent, his fingers that were drawing circles on your side slowly stopping. 

“for a moment i forgot i have a day off” he finally answered, a cute giggle leaving his lips. the gesture made his chest shake, leaving you smiling. 

“wake me up when you wake up” you just hummed, fully embracing the coziness of his warmth and layers of blankets. 

“see you in my dreams” taehyun whispered before falling into slumber once again.

m.list <3

taglist. @primoppang ,, @mirxzii��,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @slytherinshua ,, @kazmura

 @nicholasluvbot ,, @ameliesaysshoo ,, @weird-bookworm ,, @mon2sunjinsuver ,, @ocean-minho ,, 

@eternalgyu ,, @haecien ,, @nonononranghaee

[tinietaehyun]

Wondrous Tales

[Wonderland!txt x lost!reader] [one-shot series]

Pairing(s): wonderland!txt! x lost!reader

Genre(s): fantasy, dark fantasy, romance, supernatural, thriller, one-shots.

Contains: (specific to each one-shot)

Links: Masterlist

Summary: Upon your stroll in the park, you stumble upon an envelope on the grass. With further inspection, it appears to be an invite of sorts. How peculiar indeed.

Wonderland? What was that? Did someone accidentally drop an invite for a birthday or costume party on their way?

Brimming with curiosity, you open up the flap to peek inside. Initially there seems to be no name, huh, it’s not addressed to anyone. Then why…

Before you could even finish your thought, you begin to see the world around you warp and twist as you soon come to realise the dire consequences of your insatiable curiosity.

Perhaps you should have left that damn invite alone because now, you were stuck in a whole other whimsical and whacky world with no idea how to get out!

Luckily (or unluckily) for you, you’ll meet some rather interesting people along your journey to leave. Though….dear reader, will you successfully escape or become ensnared by the five lovely figures of Wonderland?

1. The White Rabbit - Choi Soobin

➸ “The timekeeper of Wonderland, no matter how efficient he is, he is destined to run late. A timid soul who has always led guests to their doom, there’s not much he can do about it after all.”

Summary: With your abrupt arrival into this whimsical space, you wander around aimlessly. How odd, every turn you took, you ended up in the same spot.

Though as they say, third time’s the charm, when you encounter a blonde haired man, with a top hat and formal attire - goodness, were you going insane already?

The man gives you a gentle smile, walking towards you with his hand outstretched, “Goodness it’s been awhile since we’ve had any guests,” he observes you, “A pretty one no less.” That‘s it, you were definitely going insane.

He brings your hand to his lips with a soft gaze, “You must be so frazzled, guests always are. Well it’s my pleasure to be your guide. Now, come on, chop, chop, time’s ticking.” With a swift tug, you’re getting pulled along by this strangely tall man. What had you gotten yourself into?

Read here!

2. The King Of Hearts - Choi Yeonjun

➸ “A ruthless, flirtatious man with a dramatic flare who has quite the fondness for new guests. So much so, half don’t even make it out. He’s always looking for entertainment and wishes to be the centre of attention, so always make sure you give him what he wants.”

Summary: You peer around at this red, black and white lavish interior. A shudder vibrates through you - maybe you were better off with Soobin. You wonder what happened to him, everything happened so quickly. One moment he grasped your hand tightly and the next you saw him getting dragged away!

The guards shove you through a set of grand heart engraved doors and you stumble to your knees. Peering up, you see the man himself, one leg atop the other, a bored expression on his face, his eyes glimmering in intrigue.

“Ah, my darling guest, have you already fallen for me? Surely, you must have plans to keep me more entertained than that.” He smirks almost too sweetly with a flick of his wrist, “After all, you’ll find out very quickly, what happens to those I get bored with.”

Read here!

3. The March Hare- Huening Kai

➸ “Tea, tea, tea. It’s always tea time for him. Time for tea? Or is it tea’s time to be had? Don’t ever refuse his offer for tea, or you’ll find yourself perpetually mad.”

Summary: Gasping and panting raggedly for breath, you seemed to have done good by sliding down the fluorescent tunnel as a last resort! The King’s guards almost caught you!

What a maniac he was! How could someone be so obsessive? Your heart rate slows as you peer around, huh, this area seemed secluded. You deem it should be safe to take some rest here. Right? Goodness, you couldn’t trust this place at all! Little by little you feel your sanity tearing away.

“Oh? Who’s wandered into my little grove? Another guest for my tea party?” Your head snaps up seeing a tall man, with a coy grin as he clicks his tongue, walking towards you, “Oh you must be the pretty little guest I’ve heard so much about…oh then, join me, won’t you? For my little tea party?”

You had a feeling you couldn’t refuse even if you wanted to.

Read Here!

4. The Mad Hatter - Choi Beomgyu

➸ “His pretty face hides the most decrepit madness. A man who killed time, quite literally. Is being mad so bad? Is being bad so mad? Why be suppressed with all those boring rules and go insane with the Hatter instead?”

Summary: Having managed to elude the tea party and trick Kai into thinking you’ll stay, you scramble for your life by bargaining with a strange caterpillar hanging from the trees to escape.

Being barely lucid, you stumble into what seems to be another secluded grove, another tea party. Oh, you were definitely mad by this point. Not again! You see exuberant host with his feet up on the table with a grin, “Welcome, welcome, do come and join me, little love. I have lots of tea or are you sick of it from the March Hare?”

Panicked you rush off past him, he makes no move to chase after you. How strange. “Toodles, love!” Grimacing you rush off through the tangled foliage….only to arrive back to where you were facing the man again. A loop…?

“Time’s prisoner I am, and so you will be too. I’m awfully lonely and the hare’s fed up of my games. You’ll play with me and keep this Hatter company won’t you?”

Read here!

5. The Cheshire Cat - Kang Taehyun

➸ “A man with hypnotic eyes and a killer smile, almost uncanny in its slyness. A man who likes to toy with his prey and use his wit to outsmart any and who dare to trespass his woods. He isn’t mad like the others, no, under his grin, hides someone smarter than everyone in Wonderland.”

Summary: You break the loop and take the Hatter off guard by your boldness, managing to somehow bypass his riddles and games. With all your remaining strength, you run deliriously, where? You don’t know.

All you know is the thousands of signs reading and pointing to an “exit” were taunting you. You couldn’t believe them. Not anymore, you couldn’t believe anyone, or anything in this world. You were not stupid enough to follow those damn signs and so, you go the opposite path. Into the Dark Woods.

Finding yourself even more lost and the last of your sanity crumbling away, the pollen in the air making you feel hazy, you’re startled to hear a voice, “Well, well, well, what a pretty thing has stepped into my woods today. Has no one told you I don’t like trespassers, hm?” Your eyes snap up to a man lounging in the branches above with a wide grin, “Don’t look so scared, I don’t bite too hard.”

Read Here

Taglist: [CLOSED]

@naoristerling @staaaarykids @tremendousphantommiracle @lun4kazumii @lunathewritingcat @ur-mother-realnotclickbait @taehyhunnzly @20crowsinahoodie @baekberrie @syraphyina @fullbodyblankets @soohashits @f4iryfever @themochiverse @atiny-chocolate-chip @nothingwithoutgyu @ethystclove @hancafe @nap-of-a-starr @isa942572 @evn-09 @ninitorih @m3chigo @tenleeluvr-blog @matcha-binz @soobunnymoa @sleepyygyu @nicngyu @vicurious28 @kurokkkiko0 @zyoopioo @noraimp @bvqler @lailols @iiisusy @astridxxxx @kookiesbunny @scrumptiousloser

[gyorouis]

── ✦ december.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚 ˚⋆ synopsis⸝⸝ wrap me all up and take me home with you

꒰ genre⸝⸝ romance, enemies-to-lovers, slow burn pairing⸝⸝ jock!taehyun x afab!reader wc⸝⸝ 1.4k warning⸝⸝ mutual pinning, suggestive theme, they‘re both competitive, my never-ending ETL tyun agena tune in⸝⸝ ariana grande — december ୨ৎ ꒱

“don’t tell me you’re planning to charm the entire room tonight,” beomgyu teased, nudging taehyun as they stepped into the grand ballroom.

the university’s annual winter gala was in full swing, the grand ballroom alive with the soft glow of chandeliers and the hum of conversations layered over upbeat music. students mingled in their best attire, and taehyun, ever the picture of perfection, was in his element. as the captain of the football team and the campus golden boy, he had an image to maintain: polished, composed, and entirely unbothered.

adjusting his tie with a practiced nonchalance, he surveyed the scene. the decorations were immaculate (because, of course, he’d overseen them), and everything was running smoothly. it was the kind of night that should’ve been effortless for him—another event to cement his status as untouchable.

and then, he saw you.

you were standing by the dessert table, laughing with your friends, your eyes bright and your smile infectious. you weren’t just pretty—you were radiant, the kind of radiant that made the air shift. the sight of you knocked the wind out of his carefully crafted cool.

taehyun’s jaw tightened. he wasn’t new to seeing you. as the captain of the cheer dance team, you were his rival in more ways than one. your rivalry was campus legend: the cheer squad versus the football team, each determined to outshine the other at every game and event. but tonight, something about you felt different. you weren’t just his rival anymore—you were a distraction, a complication he hadn’t prepared for.

still, taehyun wasn’t one to back down.

he approached you with the same swagger that made half the campus swoon, his voice dripping with that signature competitive edge. “well, well,” he drawled, “didn’t think you’d show up. thought you’d be too busy choreographing another routine to one-up us.”

you turned to face him, arching an eyebrow, and he swore the room tilted for a second. “and miss a chance to see you strut around like you own the place? never.”

his lips curved into a smirk, the kind that usually had people eating out of his hand. “funny. i was about to say the same thing about you.”

“cute,” you shot back, taking a deliberate sip of your drink. “but don’t flatter yourself, taehyun. not everything’s about you.”

“sure it’s not,” he teased, leaning casually against the table, his eyes never leaving yours. “so, who dragged you here? or did you actually want to come?”

you crossed your arms, the movement drawing his attention in ways he didn’t want to admit. “not that it’s any of your business, but i’m here because i earned it. unlike you, i don’t need a title to prove my worth.”

his grin widened, the playful challenge in your tone sparking something dangerous in him. “ouch,” he said, clutching his chest in mock pain. “you’ve been saving that one, haven’t you?”

“maybe,” you said, the corners of your lips twitching into a reluctant smile.

as the night went on, it seemed like fate—or maybe something more deliberate—kept throwing the two of you together.

“you’re following me,” you accused after the third time your paths crossed.

“hardly,” he replied, his expression all mock innocence. “this is my event, remember? you’re just conveniently always in my way.”

“oh, please. i was here first.”

he tilted his head, his smirk deepening. “you were here first? wow. didn’t know they gave awards for that.”

you rolled your eyes but couldn’t stop the laugh that slipped out.

later, you found yourself on the balcony, escaping the noise and the heat of the ballroom. the december air was sharp against your skin, but the quiet was worth it.

you weren’t alone for long.

“escaping already?”

you turned to see taehyun leaning against the doorway, his blazer draped over one shoulder. the way the cold moonlight caught on the sharp lines of his face made your breath hitch, though you’d die before admitting it.

“what do you want?” you asked, your voice more tired than hostile.

“nothing,” he said, stepping closer, his footsteps soft against the stone. “just figured you’d be out here. you always seem to need a breather after a big event.”

you frowned, caught off guard. “how do you even know that?”

he shrugged, a small, almost shy smile tugging at his lips. “i pay attention.”

his words hung in the air, heavy with meaning.

you turned back to the railing, your grip tightening against the cold metal. “so what? you came out here to gloat?”

“no,” he said simply, leaning beside you. his shoulder brushed yours, and the contact sent an uninvited shiver down your spine. “i came out here because... well, it’s not every day i get to see you like this.”

“like what?” you asked, your voice quieter now.

“like... stunning,” he admitted, the word barely above a whisper.

your heart skipped, but you refused to let him see the effect he had on you. “don’t get used to it.”

“too late,” he said, his tone soft but sure.

the mistletoe was an accident.

you were brushing past him on your way back into the ballroom when someone shouted, “hey, mistletoe alert!”

you froze, as did he, both of you glancing up at the offending sprig of green hanging above your heads.

“seriously?” you muttered, already feeling the heat of the crowd’s eyes on you.

taehyun’s smirk returned, but there was something else in his gaze now, something deeper. “rules are rules,” he said, his voice lower than usual.

“you’re insufferable,” you shot back, though your voice lacked its usual venom.

“and yet, here we are,” he replied, stepping closer, his breath warm against your cheek.

the kiss wasn’t just a kiss. it was heat and tension and something unspoken that neither of you had the courage to name. his lips were soft but firm, and when he pulled back, his eyes lingered on yours, dark and unreadable.

“merry christmas,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

your heart raced, your pulse pounding in your ears. “don’t think this means you’ve won,” you said, your voice steadier than you felt.

“oh, i know,” he said, his grin returning, though softer now. “but it’s a good start.”

gyo's note: just my never ending enemies to lovers agenda on tyun 🤓 hahahaha i just LOVEEEE tyun on ETL trope sm! and it shows on the stories i wrote for him eheee, anyway if you made it this far, thank you! (,,>﹏<,,) you will be loved, xoxo!

✮ 2024 gyozies, all rights reserved.

[gyuslvrr]

[ᴋ.ᴛʜ] | 𝘀𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁

sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: interviewing your boyfriend during his recent promotions has you realising how long its been since its just been you and him

ᴀ/ɴ: gn reader ; THIS IS SO BAD IM SO SORRY IM LITERALLY DROWNING IN STRESS FROM SCHOOL AND WORK

THIS IS SO OLD IM SORRY I DIPPED FOR 2 YEARS

— idol!reader x idol!txt masterlist

It’s awkward. It’s awkward to interview your boyfriend and acting as if you’re both strangers who only know each other because of your popularity in korean media.

It’s especially awkward when his band members stare at you with wide, teasing eyes and prolonged answers that sound a bit odd to the audience.

“Cut!” The director yells out and simultaneously the studio erupts into meaningless chatter. You can’t help but feel a bit flustered as your co-host stands up to walk away, meaning that he’s left you alone to speak to the members. The prolonged silence has you cringing as the tomorrow x together members stare at you expectantly, waiting for you to start up a conversation.

It’s like they do it on purpose.

“Why were you guys so awkward?” You whine, hiding behind the cue cards to hide your embarrassed expression. The boys laugh heartily, spewing out their excuses as they begin to speak happily without the restraint of being filmed.

“Because it’s so funny when our Taehyun’s girlfriend is interviewing us!” Beomgyu teases as he cards his hands through Taehyun’s black hair with a cheesy smile on his face.

You can’t help but frown - lightheartedly! - at Beomgyu’s teasing. Taehyun can’t help but giggle playfully, but the act looks so odd when his face is covered in fake cuts and scratches to fit the concept of his title track.

“Yeah. Well, get used to it, Beomgyu” You retort friskily while jabbing your cue cards in the direction of said boy “‘Cause I’m gonna be interviewing you lot every other day” You emphasise the last three words for dramatic impact.

Beomgyu fights back but his voice turns into background noise as Taehyun takes you by the wrist to pull you away from him. Knowing Beomgyu, he would have you arguing with him until the sun set and moon rose that night.

“Beomgyu will hog you if you keep talking to him” Taehyun mumbles as he weaves you between the sea of idols and Inkigayo staff. You exhale with a puff of your chest at the blatant truth, but also in admiration of your boyfriend's face. Peering up to him from his side has your heart fluttering all over again as if it were the first time you had crossed paths with him.

The first time you saw Taehyun, he had fluffy blonde hair and was wearing pastel clothes but now with his shaggy black hair and grunge clothing it’s almost as if you were dating a different boy. But you weren’t. No matter how Taehyun looked, he would always be the same Taehyun you fell in love with.

“You look pretty today, by the way” Taehyun smiles compassionately as he flickers his gaze back down to you. It’s as if he read your mind but the act has your stomach flipping nervously and you can’t help but look away from unusual bashfulness.

Being caught up in your own thoughts you don’t realise how quickly Taehyun had found the empty corridor idol couples would usually escape too. Luckily - or unfortunately for others - the corridor never had a lot of traffic in it as couples would rarely be promoted at similar times.

“You’re too quiet. Why are you shy?” He asks as he uses his right hand to tuck a piece of your curled hair behind your ear. The act causes a warmth to race to your cheeks.

“Just thinking” You start as your hands begin to toy with the buttons on Taehyun’s shirt. Taehyun watches curiously with his usual sparkle in his wide eyes “Just thinking about how when I first met you… You were so different”

Taehyun peers quizzically and with his head titled to the left, you can picture a comical question mark above his head.

“Is that bad…?” He trails.

“No! It’s not bad but I was thinking how when I first met you… it was during blue hour promotions and you were so different on the outside?” You almost cringe at your words and Taehyun breathes out an airy laugh as you begin to spill out any words that would come to your head.

“But even with you being so.. emo?” You giggle with Taehyun “You’re still Taehyun… You know?”

Taehyun blinks slowly as he processes the spew of backed up thoughts that had clearly been sitting in your mind for a while now.

“I mean, just because my hair is black now I’m not gonna change my personality” Taehyun teases as he brings his thumb and forefinger to your cheek to pinch it facetiously. A grumble leaves your mouth as you pull away from Taehyun timidly.

“Hey..”

“I feel like this is more than just me changing hair colours, isn’t it?” Taehyun questions softly. With your back against the wall ( both physically and metaphorically ) you can’t help but feel like you should clear the air.

“I miss you a lot, Tyunnie” The pout takes place on your face as soon as you finally spill the truth. Taehyun mirrors your expression almost immediately as he pulls you towards his chest.

Relaxing into Taehyun helps your heart rest a little. Having not spoken to your boyfriend about serious things since his schedule had been so packed, you felt as if a weight had been lifted off of your shoulder - but also a sense of anxiety after revealing the truth.

“I promise as soon as I’m done with promotions I’m taking you on the best date ever” Taehyun declares with a determined look on his face. The expression causes you to laugh heartily to which Taehyun smiles genuinely.

“You know I’d be happy to go to your dorms if it meant I got to spend time with you” Your flirty confession has Taehyun scoffing as he nods his head away from your face.

“You just want to see Odi” He shakes his head dismissively.

You smile “You caught me” You joke as Taehyun laughs once more.

[hyukascampfire]

TO: SOMEONE FROM A WARM CLIMATE ... ❨ O6 ❩ ⸺ 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦, 𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘵 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴

𝓘N WHICH 𝗁𝗎𝗋𝗍 𝖿𝗂𝗓𝗓𝗅𝖾𝗌 𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖾𝗒𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗅𝗂𝗇𝖾𝗌 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖿𝖺𝖼𝖾. "𝗂𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝖾𝗆𝗌 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗏𝖾 𝖺𝗅𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝗒 𝖽𝖾𝖼𝗂𝖽𝖾𝖽 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂 𝖺𝗆 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗆𝖾, 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾𝗇'𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎?" 𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗍𝗎𝗆𝖻𝗅𝖾𝗌 𝗎𝗉 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗌𝖾𝖺𝗍, 𝗍𝗈𝗐𝖾𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖺 𝖼𝗎𝗋𝗅𝖾𝖽 𝗅𝗂𝗉. "𝗌𝖺𝗒 𝗂𝗍," 𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗌. "say what i am."

faerie!𝗍𝖺𝖾𝗁𝗒𝗎𝗇 ╱ faerie!𝗒𝖾𝗈𝗇𝗃𝗎𝗇 · ƒ ! r 15k 𝖿𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗌𝗒 ⸺ smut, angst, unprotected sex, mentions of past trauma, kissing scars, yandere themes, oral f rec, overstimulation, cumming on belly, power play, jealousy and possessiveness �� ( playlist )

← rꫀׁׅܻblogs & asks arꫀׁׅܻ always apprꫀׁׅܻciatꫀׁׅܻd! ♡(ᗒᗣᗕ )՞ →

🪶 ⦂ look what's finally out. i almost shed a tear formatting this post. i've missed this series so much. hehe. did i shed a few real tears over this? yes. i know that this part is shorter, and i did cut some stuff out, but i think that it packs the biggest punch. things HAPPEN. there is no meandering here.

“Tomorrow?” Beomgyu says. He’s laid with his shoulder pressed to yours, watching the ceiling the same lazy way you do.

Tomorrow. Leave it to Taehyun to spring stuff on you. Just when this place started feeling like home, here you go packing. You suppose you could stay here with Beomgyu and stick your head in the sand, but what good would that do you? You can’t pretend that the world will stop moving around you if you do. It won’t. Ancient powers will still be toeing at war, and Taehyun will still be general, and you will still be too near to the center of it all than you ought to be. They are indelible truths, so whatever. You’ll go to that war camp with him, if it’s for the best. 

For tonight, though, you’ll enjoy Beomgyu’s presence. You almost want to ask him to come with you, but to the kelpie, being dragged into some meandering court war is worse than being left here by himself. Truly, he’ll probably be here thriving by his lonesome. Kelpie is as kelpie does.

You echo the word with a sigh. “Tomorrow.”

He turns to you, mischief sparkling in his mud eyes. Even without words, you know exactly what that look’s supposed to be saying.

“Don’t even start,” you say, elbowing him. “I was just beginning to think that I might miss you. Of course, you had to remind me of your nagging…” There’s no real bite. You’re never really annoyed, and Beomgyu doesn’t really care to run away. 

Well, he might. You like to think that he’d at least look back twice were he to get the chance to make his grand escape for the treeline. But this conversation is more of a strange, unconventional comfort for the both of you than it is a genuine consideration.

“You’ll miss the nagging most.” He turns props himself up on an elbow. “Will you talk with the grass stalks when you’re there? The Lord isn’t much for words, and you love to hear your own.”

Gasping, you glare. “Are you calling me annoying? That’s not fair coming from you. You love the sound of your own voice more than any faerie I’ve known, and you love the sound of your own voices.”

Of course, Beomgyu takes pride in that. “I do tell a story good. You should love my voice, too.”

He’s awful, but you laugh. He’s right enough. There was a time, when you first brought him here from his forest, that you’d talked to him for so long into the night that your voice went raw. You had never talked so much in your life.

“I guess the grass will have to do.” You interlace your fingers on your belly.

“They are quite humorous.”

“Whatever, liar,” you snort.

“Oh, but they are.” Sitting up, Beomgyu’s snarled hair hangs as he looks down, impish amusement bursting at the seams of his face. “Such a human thing; to think that because you don’t know it, then it can’t be how it is. Everything has something to say, you just don’t hear it.”

Blinking, you look at him. “I guess that’s true,” you say. You’d always known that there was a lot about the world that you didn’t know, but you are reminded of that more than ever these days. Even just in little things like this. “I wonder how it’ll be.”

Beomgyu looks a little bit less playful. “You’ll need to watch yourself. Humans don’t go to faerie war camps. They won’t be glad to have you there. The Lord thinks he’s protecting you, but our world is feeling the unbalance. Not even his mind, as sharp as he thinks it is, can predict what’s unpredictable.”

How terribly ominous is that. “Do you know something I don’t?” you ask, releasing a short breath for a laugh and fiddling with the trim of your pillow that you’d made pretty with gold swirls.

Beomgyu shoots you one of his eerie, knowing grins that leaves you unsure whether you should laugh with him or worry about what it means. 

“What?” you say, giving him a contemptuous frown instead. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

You’re reminded of when he’d told you similar things when he’d helped with your geas. You will never be whole again, but you ought to savor what you’ve got left. Perhaps he does it just to mess with you, but you’ll never be sure. That’s the thing about a faerie: the moment you think you’ve understood who they are and what they’ll do, they’re different the next. Capricious and ever-changing, at least to your human mind.

You’d thought you’d known a faerie once. That’s a lesson better taught than learnt.

Or maybe what you have here, in those strange eyes and that fickle smile, is just friendship, and the things he says are just because of what he is. Maybe you’re trying to look at Beomgyu through the same cracked lens that Yeonjun had left you with. You’d been a trusting girl once. Breathing out a sigh, you take a long look at his face. Shouldn’t you let yourself be her again? Isn’t it unfair to assume the worst of him because of what another did?

“It means that I worry for you,” he says, flopping back down beside you. “And that you should be safe. I don’t wish to live in this terrible estate with just the Lord, some servants, and I.”

You blink up at the ceiling, your throat tight for whatever reason. “A lie,” you say. It comes out more as a rueful complaint than the shoddy joke you intended for it to be. It’s hard when you’re not sure whether or not you believe it to be the truth. He’s the one that said he could lie if he wanted to.

His gaze falls on you, old in its weight. “And so, if it is?” he says. His voice is gentle, or perhaps comforting, in a way you weren’t sure he could be. “Would you make yourself sick debating it? Hanging onto every word to discern whether it's a real truth or a faerie truth?”

Instead of speaking when you don’t know what to say, you turn to him and let his words wrap around your bones. 

You would, just as you always have. Out of all the people that’s not fair to, it might just be the most unfair to yourself. You’ll never know for certain, so why torture yourself trying to?

Well, if only it were that easy. If only you could know what someone intends before you give them a tender spot in your chest to leave achingly empty. To leave it bruised and a shriveled, wary husk of its former self. 

“And,” he says, full of humor, “if not you, then who would I bother asking to release me from the bridle’s hold? Not the Lord. He wouldn’t tolerate it. He’d keep me here for an eternity, was it convenient for his own plans.”

No, you don’t think he would. Taehyun hadn’t gotten Beomgyu to serve his menial needs; he hadn’t gotten him for himself. You wonder if you’ve been looking at Taehyun through that same, warped lens you’ve been seeing the rest of the world with. Did you let it bend his image into something untrue?

“Of course,” you say, rolling your eyes. “I was wrong. You are predictable. Maybe I’m with Taehyun on that.”

❆

Cutting through snow up to your calves and with a pack on your back and Taehyun’s silhouette leading the way, it’s impossible to not remember the last time you did this. So much has changed since then, and then so much has stayed unchanged.

It’s been months since you two came north. A lifetime ago. And so much has happened between the both of you, quicksand up to your ears, but you can’t say you know him that much better than you did then. You might even know less now. It’d been cut and clean—he was a dark, impolite man that saw the world down his nose.

Going west, it takes less time for frost and white forest floor to give way to green than it had when you went north. Foliage. Seeing a forest untouched by the cold’s bitter death has you breathing in the air, savoring the way it doesn’t sting your lungs. It’s fresh in a different way.

Once your feet begin to ache, you make a small camp for the night. Camp, meaning a fire made of damp wood off the forest floor that’s reluctant to burn and tree stumps to lean your back against. Good that it’s warmer here.

Taehyun gets some poor small forest animal to roast, and you brought some apples to eat on the way. The gamey tang and the sweetness mesh into something that’s not too awful, considering your circumstances. You sit down by the meek fire, holding your palms out at it. You’re not so far away from home yet that the night doesn’t at least make your bones ache with the chill.

“Did you not know until recently that they’d want you to go to the camp?” you say, trying to warm the air between you in the same way you toast your numb fingers.

With one arm propped up on a bent knee and his apple dangling untouched in his hand, he shakes his head. The fire dances an array of oranges and yellows in his eyes. “I’m their general. It doesn’t matter why I did it; if I don’t play the part, it’ll have been for nothing. If I stayed in my estate, they’d have no use for me.”

So, it was his idea. “Why didn’t you say so earlier?”

Taehyun purses his lips, watching the fire. Thinking about whether or not to say. “I thought it’d upset you,” he says finally after a long moment.

Unsure of what to say to that, you take a pause. Truthfully, you hadn’t expected that—that he thought it would be fine either way, that he hadn’t thought to, that it wasn’t up to him, you might’ve assumed. He was nervous to tell you that he, and by extension you, were going to have to go? He didn’t say it outright. Taehyun never would. But the thought is sweet, in a way. Your lips turn up at the corners, a soft and unexpected smile.

“I guess that’s true,” you say. You would’ve gone either way, though. The fire sizzles and pops as it eats up the wet logs, the little stack falling. “Don’t you worry about the fact that they might find out that you’re not so enthusiastic about the war? To be general?”

“As long as I do their bidding, I don’t think they’ll care what I believe in.” He shrugs. “I play general, they get to have war. If they aren’t coming to our doorstep because we were spies, that’s all I care about.”

You suppose that’s right. Neither of you are looking out to play hero, anyway. Just to survive. The both of you seem to always be doing that together. 

“What are they asking of you?” you say. If they’re moving out into camps, then something must be happening. That was inevitable. 

“The camp is near the King’s castle. Just a little north of it, on a big grass plane. They’re not looking to be sneaky anymore,” he says. “So, it could be anything.”

Nodding, you cozy back up against the tree. You hope it’s not anything too terrible. For his sake.

❆

Taehyun’s not awake by the time you stir, his arms crossed over his chest and his head back on the bark. A few early birds sing back and forth to each other from the boughs of the trees above you. It’s a sound as fresh and clear as the blue dawn sky and the dew that sparkles from the grass.

How sweet it all would be, did the bottom of your spine not pinch from the night spent upright on your ass, and were there not the unignorable muckiness that clings to your skin from a day spent walking. Dusting your palms of dirt where you’d planted them to the ground, you decide to make a trip to the gentle stream that had lulled you to sleep with its rushing last night. A bath in that water would definitely wake you up quick.

You follow the sound of it until it appears from between two trees. It just looks cold, rushing over the mud riverbank a crystal clear color. You kick off your boots and test it, gasping as it bites. You can’t help but smile at yourself—it’s exactly what you need to come out fresh enough to suffer another day of dragging your feet over the ground.

Getting in is like pins and needles. You peel your clothes off and step in up to your hips, your hisses meshing with the sounds of the morning air. Damn it, it’s cold. Ice cold, as it runs down your spine from where you cup it and wet your hair. And when you’ve gone numb to it, you feel the water rushing in between your fingers, scrubbing it over your skin, letting the crystalline coolness make you clean.

Hopefully, they’ll have some way for you to bathe there. The folk don’t need to bathe for hygiene the way you do, and they’d have no reason to bring a luxury like a tub along in that case. It’s a war camp. You wonder in what other ways it’ll be inhospitable for a human.

Maybe you’ll have to find a river, there, too—

Taehyun’s voice startles you. “You didn’t think to at least tell me you were going?” There isn’t any real bite, more like annoyance. 

You freeze, heart kicking into action so hard that you feel it. You thought he’d be asleep for at least until you got back. Covering your chest with your arms, you spin.

“Sorry,” you say, cheeks burning. Why’s this feel so… Well you don’t even know how to put it into words. He’s had his hands all over you, his lips on you, but him catching you like this just is different. Frankly—you’re flustered, aware of each inch of bare skin, water still rolling down your body and your hair laying in wet tendrils,  that he has to pretend he doesn’t see. For your sake.

Or maybe it doesn’t phase him. Your tummy flips. Would that be for the better or worse?

“I thought something happened,” he says. Curt. Short. “You shouldn’t be out alone like this. It leaves you vulnerable.” His eyes stay trained on your face—distinctly, purposefully. It’s almost humorous how stone-faced he is. Almost, if your heart wasn’t pounding in your ears.

“I wanted to clean up.” You shiver, maybe at the soft breeze on your wet skin or maybe at the redness of his ears. “I’ll tell you. Next time.” Please go, so I can put some fucking clothes on, you want to add.

“Yeah. That would be useful.” He thumbs the hilt of his sword. “Finish up and meet me back at camp. We should get going.” Unceremoniously, he turns on his heel and disappears back into the trees, spine straight.

Water falls from you as you step onto land, wringing your hair out. You’re just glad he didn’t insist on closing his eyes and staying as you dress to keep watch. 

Add that to the list of reasons the air becomes suffocating the moment you’re in proximity to him. It seems that the things you leave unsaid and unaddressed, like those words he’d said to you when he kissed you for the second time, the ones that make your spine tingle the more you pretend they didn’t happen, are sometimes heavier than what you do say.

❆

Camp is a scattering of a few tents raised on a grassy stretch, just as Taehyun had said. Their flags willow in the wind, pointed swords strewn out beside straw-stuffed dummies. 

You’re sharing a tent with Taehyun. It’s simple: two beds on opposing sides, trunks for your belongings, and nearly nothing else. You appreciate your bed at home a little more when you plop down into the cushions, but blankets and pillows are better than tree trunks and bark.

Taehyun slips in some time later. It’s dark out behind him as he does, the stars hanging above. 

“It’s certainly functional in here,” you say, running your fingers through nasty tangles in your hair like a comb. “A war camp.”

“We’ve both slept in worse.”

“Yeah, we have,” you snort, but don’t miss the distance in his voice. After a few beats, just watching him lean his sword against the wall, you ask, “Did something happen?”

He breathes out slowly through his nose, eyes caught where he’d just placed his heavy, dutiful sword. “They want to go straight for bloodshed. They thought I’d get here and just march into the fucking palace.”

You open your mouth, bracing your hands on the mattress beside you as if unsure if you want to stand up or gawk at him. “What? Just walk right up? How does that make any sense?” you say. “You said no, right?”

“Yes, I said no.” Taehyun sits on his bed and works on the laces of his boots. “It doesn’t just make no sense. It’s not how war works. Not a faerie war.”

“Were they… okay with that? You telling them no?” He’s not a general that has commanded an army at war—not his father. They know nothing but the fact that Taehyun is the General’s son and that he’s come here pretending that he’s somebody to tell them what they should or shouldn’t be doing. The faerie ego is not sympathetic to that.

He grits his teeth, jaw flickering.

No. Most definitely not. “Why go in with swords? They know that, by hospitality, they’d have to entertain us if we asked to be. A feast, a celebration of nothing, literally anything. And then we could make a quiet move while we’re in there. Battling it out in some field is ridiculous.”

Taehyun blinks. Thoughts turn in his head, visible through his eyes. “That would break the rules of hospitality, though.”

“So, they won’t see it coming. It seems better than just throwing armor on and hoping we can outnumber them. You said that the North couldn’t win this, but isn’t that only if we play by their rules? Of course they’ll do better when it’s the stakes they put up.”

“You’re good at that.”

“Well,” you say, unsure and flustered. “It just makes the most sense. I thought it’d be what you were thinking too.”

He lets his head drop into a laugh. A laugh. You don’t think you’ve ever held on to the sound of someone’s laugh the way you do the soft, mellow sound. 

You linger on the last remnants of his smile, letting its stark contrast with his usual disposition ring through your bones, as he snuffs out the candle and lets a new, uncharted kind of silence fall over the space.

You linger on it as you fall asleep, too. 

❆

The camp becomes more hollow as Taehyun takes up his role. The only time you get to see him now is when he steps into the tent too late in the night. He’s always up earlier than you.

It’s not like you have anything else to do. Other than Taehyun, this place is just an encampment of strange, hard faces and unnerving eyes that watch you as you toil through the days. Eyes that are curious as to why you’re even here. You start to wonder the same, under their scrutiny. It certainly feels like you shouldn’t be. 

You know better than to stick your nose in their business or to try and make friends. Instead, you whittle time down with practicing on the fine, veneered bows and taking your needle to any tattered old fabric you see. 

Today, you snatched one of Taehyun’s simple black tunics to work away at. All you’d brought in your pack when you had stuffed your essentials in there was some black thread. So you stitch blackthorn branches around the cuffs even though nobody would notice unless they cared to look.

You thread and you thread, letting the world blend into nothing as it always does when you work with your hands like this. The sun sinks from its peak, casting golden afternoon warmth onto your skin from in between tents. You focus on that. When you were a girl, you did the same thing with the goldspun threads you had then. It’s one thing you had for yourself.

Only the sound of something different draws your attention enough to drag you away from decorating the cuffs. A familiar sound; melodic and off-kilter in the same way. Something so singular that you’d know it anywhere, no matter if it made sense or not. Faerie music, and not just any faerie music.

Your feet follow the sound until you find him: a flop of golden hair, freckles spackled over his nose, and music floating away from his lute like magic. Because it is magic.

But, why would he be here?

“How come I knew you’d show up right when I was looking for you?” Kai says. He has clover in his hair, of course he does, and wears a faerie smile. “You have such a strange way of finding yourself in the middle of things. Come for a dance?” He plucks a few notes like an invitation.

You can’t disagree with that. Staying put where you are, you say, “What’s a bard got to do in a place like this?”

“A faerie needs music wherever they will go,” he answers, “and none else more than us antsy for a show.” Crisscrossed in the grass, he puts his instrument down for the first time since you’ve known the strange faerie. “It would not be remiss to say that you and I are both here on equally unlikely terms. Who is to say that you are to be here and I am not, or that I am to be, and you are not?”

Beomgyu’s vernacular has made you at least a bit more accustomed to faerie turns of speech, but Kai speaks the wordiest of them all. A taleteller. That was either fully the truth, or a lie disguised somewhere in those long and gossamer words. It has to be at least partly the truth, though, because Kai is sympathetic to the North. 

Or maybe he isn’t. You can’t tell exactly what Kai is, or what he believes in, or if he likes or dislikes you, or if he’s here or there. The only certain thing about him is that you might never know.

“Okay, well,” you say, “I’ll be off then, if we’re playing riddles.”

Kai looks up at you, his brows raised presumptuously. “Why leave when you’ve only just arrived?” he says. “We are two of a kind here. I don’t see why we two can’t be friends. And, oh, do I have something that you ought to see.”

Your interest must show in your face, because he smiles and pats the ground beside him. That could mean a hundred different things, coming from him. You don’t move, eyes narrowed.

“Don’t be wary,” he laughs. It sounds something like bells twinkling in the distance. “What good would it bring me to play tricks on you? You’ll hate to miss what I’ve brought for you.”

Still not entirely convinced, but definitely intrigued, you take a seat on the ground with him, criss-crossing your legs. A gentle breeze tugs your hair one way. It’s a beautiful day. Maybe you should’ve let yourself enjoy it a little.

“Not a trick,” you say, playing with the grass beneath your fingertips. “Then what? I thought you to be the tricksy type.”

The sun gilds his silhouette, making his hair into true gold around the edges. He laughs, nose wrinkling with such joy that you wonder if it really was that funny. “You suffer trust,” he says.

It’s nothing but a flippant, passing remark. Nonetheless, it strikes you deep, because deep down you know it’s the truth. You just hate that it’s so obvious to them and their kind. You hate that everything about you is obvious to them. It’s as though they reach in and flip through your pages, while you’re stuck out here trying to figure it out yourself. Beomgyu had done the same.

The long moment in which you look at him makes him laugh again, shaking his head. “Here. Let me show you.” He reaches into a pocket.

A letter. He produces a letter. You aren’t stupid enough to pretend that it might be from Beomgyu or anybody else. Belly dropping, you know exactly who’s written to you.

“I don’t want it,” you rush out. “Keep it. Send it back to him and tell him I won’t be taking any of his letters.”

You keep telling yourself that you’re past it. Past him. No healed person has to remind themselves that they are, or has to choke down the lump in their throat at a slight reminder as this. It is achingly pathetic.

Kai seems to think so, as well. He furrows his brows. “You don’t want them? Are you not lovers?”

“No, we are not,” you lie. Or, well, it’s the truth, but it’s as venomous as a lie on your tongue. “It doesn’t matter. I wonder why he would send you all the way here just for this.” Now, it’s clear why Kai is here at this camp. 

He grins, because your reaction makes it obvious to anybody looking close enough. “Take it. Read it at least once, and then burn it if you must. I can’t leave this place until you have it.”

That doesn’t sound so awful. Tentatively, you accept it into your hands.

Kai, in a different tone of voice than before, points at the little patch of clover that you wouldn’t be wrong to assume he stole the ones in his hair from. A four leaf clover stands proud in the center of them. “Luck, it seems,” he says, “has its own say.”

What that means, you don’t know. You take his letter and burn it in a candle flame, watching the words float up in curls of wispy smoke. Not for anger, but because you know better than to do this again. You know yourself and how much you love his sweet words too much to even allow yourself to read them first.

And over the weeks the next came and then the next. You burnt those ones too. Seeing Kai becomes your routine, stepping out into fresh air to go sit with him wherever it is. A damp patch of grass, on a fallen log out in the edge of the forest, in between two tents. He’s somebody to talk to, and goodness are you hungry for that. He’ll play old songs for you, telling you stories in which you are even less sure whether or not they’re bolstered with dramatics than Beomgyu’s.

Goodness, you miss that horse. You ask Kai to take something to him for you, since he’s coming in and out anyway. The letter you get back makes you laugh out loud. In jagged, unsightly lines, he scrawled back, sending letters now, are we?  You’re just surprised he knows how to write, honestly. Would it be a cruel joke to write back and say, you’re free? Would that even work over ink? It seems that you’ll be here forever, with the way things are going now. The long haul. Taehyun wouldn’t even know Beomgyu was gone until you got back.

Nonetheless, you are certain he’s content there by himself, though it isn’t the loch he wishes it would be. 

There’s always something happening here, and you live just on the outskirts of it. You’re not sure what. Taehyun doesn’t come to tell you about it, but from what you’ve pried at Kai over, you know that things aren’t going well. You figured as much, what with the quietness that Taehyun returns with every night, the weight of responsibility heavy on his shoulders, and the way his face has become sharper.

The weight of a leader that he will shoulder, because he believes it to be his duty.

❆

For the first time in a while, Taehyun comes back at an hour that you’re not opening one heavy eye to watch him through. Kicking the blankets off your legs, you sit up and watch him peel his doublet over his head, the one with the Blackthorn crest in silver.

And then he takes his tunic off, and there is his back, bared to your eyes. Your stomach erupts with violent butterflies. His muscles move under his skin, precise and powerful, the movement of him throwing the fabric elsewhere showing them off beneath each jagged old wound. At the top, in his shoulder blade, is one that you recognize. 

“That looks better than when I last saw it,” you say, voice gentle with sleepiness. 

Taehyun pauses, looking over his shoulder. “I thought you were asleep. I’m sorry.” 

Tension; tension as thick as smoke in the air between you. It’s been that way for a while now. Suffocating.

“No, it’s okay.” You purse your lips. “I haven’t gotten to talk with you much. I stayed up a bit later.” The fact that it insinuates that you’ve been waiting to speak with him, you don’t address. You sleep in the same little space every night. It’s hard not to want that. 

Sitting on his bed, elbows braced on his knees and his hands clasped, he looks at you for a long moment. “Is that so?” he says. “I didn’t know.”

How could he know? It’s not like the two of you have ever been the way you and Beomgyu had. The way you and Yeonjun had. There’s always been this exact indescribable tension underlying it all between you. Something you are desperate to understand, but in the same way, deeply frightened to. 

Crossing the room, you sit beside him. “I know you’re busy,” you say, filling the candle-lit air with words. “The stitches. They helped? It doesn’t look so bad.” You lie. It’s a gnarly scar, still red and tender, but no longer an open wound. For some reason, though you don’t think another scar would bother him too much, you don’t want him to know that it’s unsightly. It’s not what he deserves to hear. He got that one carrying your poisoned self when he didn’t need to. 

There are a lot of things he did for you that he didn’t need to, and you struggle to grapple with why he did. Why he left behind a spy’s golden trove of information as if those years of his life meant nothing. Why he did a number of the things he did, when it made no sense for him to. Taehyun isn’t one who will do the kinder thing over the rational thing. So, then, why?

“They did,” he hums, his voice low. “It healed up fine. Thank you.”

There’s a few long beats of silence. You’re looking at his back, curved forward into a bend, and you blurt it. You curse yourself even as it's coming out, because it’s a ridiculous thing to ask, really.

“Can I…?” you say, a soft thing that trails off toward the end. Bringing your palm up, you hover it just over his back. 

Taehyun tenses up, but he doesn’t object.

His skin is everything that a living thing’s should not be, under your palm. Cold; bitterly so, and each long, marred line is a groove under the pads of your fingertips. His back is torn up, and then smooth muscle where it isn’t. It makes your stomach sick.

“Are these… all from him?”

The timbred rumble of his voice reverberates through your palm. “No. Not all of them.” You run your fingers over a vicious, sideways scar. Something once festering and visceral, but his skin mended into something whole once more. That jagged mark will never leave, though. “But some are.”

His voice is distant and tight. You know it’s that he thinks speaking of it is pitying himself, when he survived it already. He doesn’t see it how you do—how much it’s clear that those still bother him. Your heart clenches in your chest, but you hold back all the things brimming on your tongue. You don’t want him to think you pity him.

“How did you get that one?”

He surprises you by answering. “The day I learned I was strong enough to fight him.”

Your hand freezes on his back. You knew each had a story, but hearing them is different. “What happened?” you ask, gentle but prodding. You wonder which parts of him were built by that man, and which still remind him of it.

“It doesn’t matter now,” Taehyun says. His voice is terse; walls beginning to draw back up. 

“No, it doesn’t.” You thumb the scar he got with you, and then so very slowly, you press a soft kiss to just beside it . Your breath puffs out from your nose, warmth over the frigidity of him. 

Taehyun shudders. His heart thumps in his chest—you can hear it, up this close. An unsteady rhythm, frantic against his ribcage. When he sits up and turns to look at you, his eyes are something different. Somewhere between intense, frightened, or unsure.

Your heart mimics his. With your voice soft, you say, “I’m sorry for that one.”

Where he had walked in here a war general with hard eyes and his jaw tight, the man you see now is one who hasn’t ever known a gentle touch, who hardened himself so that he couldn’t. And yet—like a frightened, unsure animal, he lets you in just enough to know that you won’t balk at his unsightliness. Beyond just his torn-up body. That doesn’t bother you, beyond the heaviness knowing what he was made to survive leaves you. Rather, down to what he is at his very core.

❆

 Most of what you know about what’s happening comes from Kai. Not that Kai has ever shown animosity toward you—with time, you’ve come to at least enjoy listening to him playing for hours. You wish Taehyun would come to you to talk about it. Wish that he felt like he could. 

What is this, between you? Is it trust, or not? You don’t know. You don’t even know how you feel, let alone even beginning to know how he does. But with this, shouldering it all himself, it looks like maybe he doesn’t. And, then again, his favorite tunic to wear for weeks has been the one that you made pretty. The threading that only he and you would know was there. Small gestures, and whatever they mean from him.

The sentiment toward Taehyun, with the faeries here, and you’re sure back home in the North, is starting to sour toward him. His moves have all fallen apart, ended up with us worse than we started off with. You keep a distance between yourself and all of that—but even you know what’ll happen if that trend keeps up. What use is a general that will lead you into loss? They’ll rid themselves of him. 

Worse. You choose not to think about that, or the dark pit it leaves in your stomach.

It makes no sense at all. Taehyun is capable and intelligent—he doesn’t do anything without considering it. If anybody in this world was to succeed in something like this, it’s him. But suddenly he is not, and you watch it weigh on him. 

And then, there’s Yeonjun. His sending letters tells you he’s at least okay. You might make peace with receiving and burning them forever, did you still not wonder about him, or ache for somebody to hold some nights. There had been a time in your life when you had never known what it was to hold or to be held, and still you lived. A bitter part of you wishes you never did. It’s like what Beomgyu had said: You’ve only got so much of yourself. Each time you fill yourself up with our magic, you lose that space. You will never be whole again

You will never be whole again. Yeonjun’s love was magic in its own right, even if it wasn’t really. It sometimes seems like it’s a hollow, empty spot inside of you where he sat. But that’s not right. It’s that he is still there, and always will be, and you feel as much when you try and pretend otherwise. So now you are to live forever as if you didn’t know him, didn’t love him, and it aches. You cannot pretend it doesn’t.

So, sometimes, you consider whether or not it’s better to live without him forever or to forget yourself and indulge. It’s not like he ever was a pure evil. Hardly that. But when you get to thinking about how sweet he’d been, how much you enjoyed it, you remind yourself of what he did, who he’s left you as. For the better. For the better.

You worry that he really will make good on what he wrote in those letters. Regardless of what he sends you now, you choose not to look. Losing you was fresh, then. Yeonjun is not nonsensical, just hurt. You tell yourself that, anyway. 

Taehyun’s in your tent before you even are tonight, slipping in after a long evening of Kai trying to teach you the lute. As handy as you are, music seems to be out of the question. You don’t just spend time with him on days where he comes with letters—it’s most of your days, now. It’s easier that way.

His shoulders are rigid. He sits, so still and lost in thought. Sword still on his hip and still dressed down to his boots, he probably hasn’t moved since he sat there. It’s not hard to imagine what it is.

“What’s wrong?” you ask, ruffling through your trunk for something to make a snack out of. “Do they still not trust you?”

Taehyun scoffs. “They don’t just not trust me. They want me out. Not all of them, but the loud ones. They think that I’m doing it on purpose.” Laughing with a caustic edge, he shakes his head and looks at you. “I wish I was.” After a moment, he adds, “How did you know?”

“Kai said as much,” you say. Forget eating. 

A look of something akin to realization flashes over his eyes, and then he nods. “Of course. Of course.”

“...What?” you say, knitting your brows. 

“Somebody’s been telling my people that I’m a traitor. Somebody’s been making sure that each and every one of my moves goes down in flames. Somebody was sent here to do a prince’s bidding and give you his letters.”

Pausing, you frown. You didn’t think that Taehyun knew about those, but you also think that he’s just pieced that together himself. “But I’ve been with him most days,” you say. You were today, and then just the day before. “He wouldn’t have been able to.”

Jaw working, Taehyun trains his eyes on you. “Does that mean you were with him always? And that doesn’t mean that he dirtied his own hands.” He pauses, softening his tone the littlest bit. “You don’t know him as well as you think you do.”

You know that. Goodness, do you know that. You might say that he’s just avoiding considering the fact that it could be that his moves have failed, but that’s not Taehyun. If it were that, it wouldn’t bother him like this. He’d try a new approach, find a way, because he is utterly capable. That’s the problem, and why he’s come to this conclusion. Because he already knows that it’s the truth. 

“Then, should we do something that couldn’t be sabotaged?”

He waits for you to elaborate with interest shining in his dark eyes. 

Flushing, you’re reminded of the last time he trusted you enough to follow your lead, and how it ended for you. Still, he looks ready to do it again. You take a gnaw at your lip before saying, “We could do something. Us, if they’re just gonna mess it up when you send others. That way we know that it gets done, and they’ll see that it’s not your fault. They’ll trust you again, even if someone’s running their mouth.”

Taehyun thinks about that for a few moments. The silence as he does reminds you again of what you stand to lose if it went sideways. “They’re not as easy to convince as that. Not if somebody’s still in their ears, and if they’ve already decided that I’m not who they want leading their army.” A beat. “But, better that than letting it happen.”

You let out a long sigh, settling down opposite of him on his bed. Letting the silence stir between you with only your eyes speaking for a few moments, you say, “You think it’s him?” Not Kai—Yeonjun. At least, the one who would want this.

“I know it is.” His face goes hard, a sharpness you’re familiar with. “And you cozied right up with his messenger. It’s ironic.”

Gritting your teeth, you shoot back, “That’s not fair.”

Taehyun doesn’t answer you. His eyes burn with something beyond anger—an expression that you can just barely name hurt. You hold back the reflexive scoff that begs to come tumbling out like an old habit. Back to this. Searching his face, you try to find what, exactly, has him looking at you like that.

“Don’t do that,” you say. The emotion that comes out with it, straining the words, surprises you. “You’re just… shutting me out again. I thought you…” You don’t finish your sentence, but the air carries the meaning along for you. I thought you would let me in.

He doesn’t answer, but there’s a flash of something over his face. A wince. Like he wants to say something, but he can’t let himself.

“Why do you do that?” you say. Your blood roars to life in your veins, and you find your mouth straining under the weight of words you’ve wanted to say, just like it has for so long. And then it buckles. “To be honest with you, Taehyun, nothing you do makes any sense. One minute, you’re looking at me so cold that it looks like I mean nothing to you, and then another you’re… You’re saying stuff that I don’t understand. One second you won’t even speak to me, and then you’re leaving behind your life because I wanted to stay with Yeonjun. Why? Why would you do that? Why didn’t you go back and tell them I was a traitor kissing their prince? Why didn’t you get me killed? You make me think…” Your voice cracks despite you, but you don’t care if it makes him see you weak. “ It’s not fair.”

The tent falls silent, the air a thousand pounds, each beat sounding like you’ve said it now. Chills erupt over your arms, and you can take none of them back, so no matter what, you will at least finally know. Finally. Your  stomach is done so tight up in knots.

“Because I never cared about being a spy,” he says, face dropped. “Or about being general, or being Lord of an estate, or about what people thought of me either way, or about any King or Queen or wars.”

Reeling, you breathe. The slow sound of it fills the room, but the pounding of your heart in your ears roars over it. That makes no sense at all. Your mind buzzes. 

 “Why did you do any of it, then, Taehyun? What do you care about?”

His throat works. Those cold eyes have something tender in them, but not a gentle tender. Tender like an old wound that he’s long since licked clean himself, that he hates to poke and examine out loud. Despite it, he tells you. Just for you, because you tend to always need him to do so. 

“Nothing. I cared for nothing.” He’s rigid, so out of place, sat in front of you. “So I gave myself purposes.”

That word, cared, puts in context so much that you have to blink and make your head stop spinning just so that you can catch a solid thought. He cared for nothing. You have had Taehyun wrong in your head down to a ridiculous, fundamental level. Taehyun didn’t become who he is because that’s what he wanted. He was a ghost, a shell left hollowed out, floating between duties that he assigned himself just to survive, like becoming a spy, or whatever else he did. He had no goal, no place he cared to call home. Never want or let himself want anything—froze himself from the inside out to ensure it.

Cared, as if he found something to care for. Your mouth dries up, belly doing flips. Because, of course he didn’t care about leaving behind his life to follow you wherever you went, when he has been cold for so long, and he felt something. Of course he went to any lengths, no matter how unsure his motivation seemed to you then, to keep you safe. Of course he tried to mold himself into Yeonjun’s shape, as unbending and unmoldable as he is, because he felt that whatever hollowness he saw inside himself, you would not want. He knew that he was pushing you away because he doesn’t know how to nurture something like that, so he tried to veneer himself with bits of the man you were so enraptured with. Filled that hollowness up with something he thought would make you look his way—but of course he’d never say it. He couldn’t make himself, no matter how much he wanted it. Because that is who Taehyun is: a contradiction of himself.

All those time’s he’d frozen up and lashed out at you, because it was fucking killing him. Seeing you with Yeonjun. You had thought moments ago that it was Yeonjun who was the one with a bottomless sea of wants. Well, where Yeonjun wants, Taehyun needs. He will have you, because somebody who has only ever let themselves want something once is not going to just let it go.

What could you even say to that? How could you digest the bigness of it? Instead of trying, you go utterly still and wide-eyed in front of him. 

He wanted something to trust. Searching his eyes, the ones that have gotten even more wildly tender in your silence, you determine that. Taehyun had nothing and nobody, not his father, not his killed mother, not a single one of his own kind in this world, to trust.

You, hands curled into the fabric of your clothes, breath fully for the first time in a while. You think you know the feeling. You think that you have become intimately familiar with the severe lack of it. That much, you can offer him.

The words fall from your mouth floaty and ethereal. Something unreal in the orange, all-too-real glow of the space. “I understand.”

About all the things that just came crashing over your head like ice water, or about the yearning for trust, you’re not sure. Either way, you do.

❆

Crouched behind some bushes, your knees dig into the mud. In front of you, the High King’s palace stands proud, briars crawling up its walls and strange, unpredictable windows here and there. It looks more like a festival hall than a palace.

Taehyun decided that doing something, just the two of you, like you had said, was best. It’s reminiscent of where you began. The two of you, spies again. In a way.

It’s nostalgic, but then it’s also so… new. The air between you, charged with new energy, but energy that grips you all the same. So many questions were answered, but so many cropped up to fill their absence.

But this feels lighter. You can’t discern why, when it fully should leave your spine tingling. The gravity of what he feels for you should tug you straight down to the earth with the force of it. It doesn’t. Turning to where he crouches beside you, you eye the lines of his profile. Your heart does a little jump.

“Now?” you say.

“A minute. We have to wait for the watch to change.” He tilts his head up in a point gesture toward the massive door at the main entrance.

“Or, we could go in another way. I’m sure they have other doors. How can we just walk right in?”

“There could be a door in through the servant’s quarters, but…” he says, eyes flicking over to you.

“That sounds like it would be better, though. Easier.” The hall is massive—you don’t doubt they use servants to make it run.

Running a thumb over the bottom of his sword at his hip, a little thing you noticed he does, Taehyun falters. “They keep human servants,” he says.

Like Soobin. Glamoured to be brainless hands, floating like spirits around the halls to fulfill their assigned purpose. You eye its walls and think of how easily you could’ve found yourself there. Some fates are fairer than others. You wish you knew why. 

“We’ll wait until we see those watchmen leave. Then we can slip in.” He says it as fact. “We’ll search rooms. It’s not much, but we could use leverage. Anything.”

You nod slowly, and then turn to watch through the gaps in the leaves.

The watch does change, as Taehyun has said. You slip in silently, and nobody stops you. If it’s so easy to make your way into here, maybe war with them wouldn’t be so unimaginable. Your eyes dart everywhere as you do. It couldn’t really be that easy.

But it is. You split off from Taehyun. At the center, there’s an opening hall where feasts must be held. You imagine how many of those have happened there, and how many of the kinds of stories Kai tells you might’ve started right beneath that high ceiling. You don’t linger long enough for anybody to find you, but you do take in the look of the walls and imagine how Yeonjun would’ve done the same years ago. His home.

You peek your head into a number of rooms. None look like anything important, but you dip in to scan them just in case. Not counting the guards, you haven’t seen a soul. Empty; each room, empty. With how alive Court had been in the north, this is starkly not that. A dead palace. How strange, considering that the North is known for its bitterness and unwelcoming nature, and this place the opposite. It doesn’t feel that way.

You come to a room that gives you pause. It’s decorated not too differently from the rest, a bedroom as opposed to studies and other sorts of rooms, bathed in crushed velvet greens. The floor is littered with a strange array of things, surfaces dusted. It’s even more vacant than the rest of the hall, left untouched by whoever called it theirs once.

And, it’s familiar. You just get this achy, tingling feeling in your core. Bending down, you blow dust off some paint. It’s bright and colorful in ways only something from the human world is. Reds, blue, yellow, a rainbow in a little palette of dried up colors. A few unfinished, amateurish canvases lean against a wooden dresser. Decks of cards, none like any from here, scatter over the wood panelling. 

Yeonjun always did like keeping human things. Dragging in a long, deep breath, you try and see if you can catch the woody, warm scent of him, left lingering here where he no doubt spent so much time. Nothing but the musk of an empty, dusty room meets you.

Picking up a leatherbound book from the blanket, you sit and pull it open. It creaks like old leather. The pages are moth-bitten and most are blank.

In an elegant hand, you find a written page. That handwriting. You loose a steadying breath. 

It reads, They say I’d only make some stupid order that all humans would be free from our people, were I King. Would that really be so terrible? 

You wet your lips. It’s some letter that never ended up with whoever he intended it for. Seeing that he did, in fact, live a wholly different life is strange. He left it behind for reasons that you know—he hated this place. Still, seeing it all confirmed. In front of your face. The rebellion must mean a lot to him. It seems, reading these little bits left behind, that he had his reasons. And obviously, he did. Nobody leaves behind their life for no reason. The time he spent in the human world changed him. Or, it magnified what had always been there: a soft spot.

Footsteps come for the door. You snap the book shut, but the door’s already opening.

“Hey,” Taehyun says. 

Clinging to the leather, you let yourself breathe. “Hey,” you echo.

“You’re not great at being quiet,” he says, lips tilting up to one side in something that you could call almost playful. “You’re lucky that there’s nobody here. Anybody with my ears would’ve known you were in here.”

You figured as much. “Why, though? Where are they?”

“I don’t know where.” His gaze flickers around the room before landing back on you. “They have never left this hall. I thought that they would’ve just sat in here and let us right in before ever leaving.”

“Eerie…” you hum, hopping off the bed. 

“Yeah.” Thoughts swirl behind those eyes. “They were smart enough not to leave anything, either. I found nothing.”

Looking down at the book you clutch to your chest, you purse your lips. Neither had you, but no part of you wants to leave this to be gnawed on some more. So, you don’t.

❆

Pulling back the bowstring comes easier now. It creaks, your arms aching. But you release your breath in a slow, measured puff, eyes finding the center of a straw bullseye a hundred yards down.

You let it fly. It cuts the air straight and makes its mark a little left of dead center. Always a little left… You huff, arms aching. Kai plays a song that faded into background noise thirty minutes ago.

“You shoot well,” Kai says. You can hear the smile in his voice. “You taught yourself?”

Shooting him a glance, you shake your head.

“Then, the General taught you himself,” he deducts. “An interesting thing.”

“I guess. A lot of things are interesting. Like how you play music the way you do.” A deflection, more than anything.

Kai pats the face of his lute. “You’ve learned how to speak like us, though you can lie. That, of all things, is interesting. You’ve spent more time around our kind than most. Tell me, what have you learned?”

He’s no doubt collecting a story he thinks he can make into a song. A storyteller like him is always listening and watching for another. That’s one way to be immortalized in this world. “I have no reason to lie,” you say, tinted with a laugh.

“Don’t you?” he says, playful eyes watching you. 

“Don’t I?” Forget your bow—you toss it elsewhere. “Am I the one with a reason to lie?”

Cocking his head to the side, his mouth splits into a grin. Many of the folk are glad for animosity; Kai seems to be the type. He knows exactly what you mean. “You have a lot to say. I’d like to hear it.”

You do. But where do you start? Instead of asking him something that beats around the bush, something he could find a loophole in, you’ll ask him plainly. That’s a start. “Why are you trying to sabotage us? Is it because of Yeonjun? Did he ask you to?”

“He did,” Kai answers, without any flounce or fakery. Straight up. It shocks you. It shouldn’t be that easy. He could’ve just as well not answered. That might’ve been as much an answer as saying it outright, though. “Does that make you hate him?”

Freezing in place, your mouth doesn’t move to say yes. You don’t know how to answer that. You wish you did. Instead, you say, “What does he think he’s achieving? What if they find out that he’s sneaking around? It’s stupid.”

“It is,” Kai hums. The day is overcast, but his colors aren’t dulled by the grey sky. “When the prince feels, he feels it true. He makes his mind, and then he lives for it.” The way his eyes meet yours strikes you. Full of meaning. “What, then, would he change his mind on something like a purpose he believed as he did that one for?”

“I’m asking you,” you say. Yeonjun feels deeply and unapologetically, you are already intimately aware of that. From the moment he told you that his initial purpose was to identify and have you as spies killed, you have wondered how deeply he stood for the cause. That’s another thing that’s troubled you for the fact that you can’t make peace with it.

Well, since he’s here in front of you, it’s best to just ask.

“Did Yeonjun love me? Really love me?”

“He did, but I believe you know that already. That’s not what you really wonder.”

You hate that he knows. Gritting your teeth, you nod.

“You interest me, so I’ll give you this. The prince has never cared to become a king. A soft-hearted, joke of an heir. So, then, why would he have rebelled against his father if not to have his spot? Because he had one purpose, after living among your kind. The prince could never stand the way we treat you. That was enough for him to leave his home and try to change it.”

Yeonjun’s book still sits somewhere in your trunk. That lines up with what you had read. 

“The prince cares for you,” he says. “More than even that. Enough to forget what else he did. Enough to forget anything else.”

There that is again. Why does it even matter to Kai? “I’m sure he said the same plenty of times before,” you say. Bitterness, as a habit. “I don’t understand why you do what he says. What’s in it for you, if he has me back? I don’t see what you gain.” Kai, who lived always between here and there.

“He’s an old friend,” he answers. “And I know what it is to love a human. That’s all.”

You purse your lips. He was a part of the rebellion as well. As mysterious as he is, of course Kai has his own reasons. 

“Tell him that, if he does love me, then he’d stop. It’s past the point where we can go back to what it was.”

“I know that what happened hurt you, but I don’t think you really believe that.” 

He says it so matter-of-factly, so airily, that it doesn’t even annoy you. Your ears go hot with defensiveness. “You don’t know me. How would you know that?”

Shrugging, he says, “It doesn’t matter what I say. But you have a few decisions you need to make for yourself. Not for what you should do, but whatever it is that you want.”

“And, what? I should decide to run back to him? Because that’s what you want, and he wants, so that’s what I should want too?” Your knuckles bleach white. “I don’t trust him. I can’t trust a word you or him say.”

“Why? Because he was scared to tell you, but still, he did because you deserved to know?”

Shaking your head, you say, “Does he pity himself? If he was as selfless as you want me to believe, he would’ve left it at that. But he didn’t. You’re here, aren’t you? That’s proof enough.”

“I’m hardly trying to say that he’s selfless. He is selfish. But it’s distorted to pretend that he’d hurt you.”

“What do you know?” you say, scoffing with pure acid. His eyes watch you as you go, but he doesn’t call after you.

Your nails make crescents in your palms, but you dig them in harder so that you feel that, rather than the aching like a poked bruise you thought had healed. His words ring disturbingly true regardless.

❆

Even though it seems that Taehyun is under more stress now than he ever was before, something has changed between you. Something unspoken.

It’s not as if he’s become talkative. But in some quiet moments, you catch him for long enough to have quiet, meaningless conversations with him into the night. And the nights where you get those dreams, he doesn’t mind you taking a spot in his bed to talk yourself out of it. He surely misses out on sleep for it, and as busy as he is, he surely needs it, but he never complains. Just listens to you ramble until you’re too tired to worry that you’ll close your eyes and find something frightening behind them.

He’s awkward. Terribly awkward about it. Sometimes he doesn’t know what to say, so he just stares at you. You imagine that he’s piecing together his speech in his head. It’s endearing in a way that has your heart clenching in your chest. He understands so much of the world so deeply, the darkest corners of it, but letting someone close? Speaking just to speak? It’s as though he’s trying to teach himself when he’s around you.

Orange flickers over the planes of his face. He watches you, his arms crossed over his chest, like he usually does.

“Taehyun?” you say, hair unkempt and your eyes sleepy. He doesn’t seem to care. “Can I ask you something?”

He hums.

Ever since he whispered it into your ear, that unintelligible word, you’ve been viciously curious. Chills erupt over your skin at the memory. Him behind you, the pads of his fingers on your skin, the heat of his breath. And, whatever it had meant, it crackled like magic in the air. Something different. 

“That one day, you said a word that I couldn’t understand. What did it mean?”

Tongue darting out to wet his lips, he shifts. “My real name.”

You freeze, mouth dropping open as though to scoff and laugh it off. But his face is bare of humor. That can’t be right. Having a faerie’s real name is as good as them handing their life over to you. They don’t just hand them over like that. Most will spend their entire life guarding holding it viciously to their chest, and for good reason. Anything you said or commanded, he would have to do. The way Beomgyu’s face had morphed when Taehyun commanded him to do anything—something like that. Anyone with a faeries name could tell them to crawl in the dirt and then take a dagger to cut their tongues out, and they would. They would. 

And, Taehyun, of all of them? It doesn’t seem logical for him to give that to you. For a man so adept at surviving, it’s out of order. “What?” you say, voice peaking. “Why?”

As if it were the most obvious thing in the world, he says flatly, “Because I trust you with it.”

Your chest tightens. What a heavy, unbelievable thing to hold: somebody’s life in your hands, and to know that without a doubt that you will nurture it. His life, with which he did not care for so long about. You understand the gravity of that.

“I could hurt you with it,” you say. You can’t breathe, the air sucked from the room. “Aren’t you worried about that?”

“Then do it.” His jaw flickers. “Hurt me with it.”

How can he just say that? “No—why would I? I won’t ever. I won’t ever even use it. I promise you.”

“It’s yours.” He shrugs. “Use it how you want.”

The words slither up your spine, tickling the back of your skull. Oh. “I don’t even remember how to say it.” Could you? The vivid memory plays out, and it’s as incoherent to you as it had been then.

In a low, breathy voice, he repeats it. The hair on your arms stands up.

It takes you a few tries before you finally manage to get something close to it to come from your mouth. The dimple in his cheek peeks out with each attempt. But when you do get it, his eyes darken.

“There,” he says, nodding once. “Say it again.”

You do. The air crackles and comes alive.

“Do you feel it?”

“Yeah,” you say. “It feels like when I ate Lachrymose.” Tastes like it, too.

He frowns. “When did you?”

The knee-jerk reaction is to lie and say that it was something that happened when you were little. But you’re trying to tell less of those. “There was this time that he took me to a market. I had to have some to even see it.”

Taehyun’s jaw ticks, shadows flickering, but he doesn’t comment on it. “I had a feeling you were off doing dumb stuff.” It’s terse, but not mean. You might even call it an attempt at humor.

Snorting, you cross your arms. “You can’t pretend I’m the mysterious one.”

“Mysterious?” he says, arching his brows.

“Yes, mysterious. What do I know about you? I guess I know that you were a spy, but that doesn’t count.”

“That’s because there isn’t much to know.” His voice goes distant like it always does when he’s thinking.

Even if he had lived a phantom life, everybody has a history. “That’s not true. I’ve never been more curious about anybody’s past than I am yours.”

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“Sorry? For what?”

“That I don’t have anything to tell you.”

A life like that must’ve been awful. Your heart aches for him. Going from one place to another, unsure why you are or what you want or what your purpose is. “Was it lonely?” you ask.

Hair brushes his eyes as he moves. They look softer under this light—not soft, but softer. “It was all I knew. It couldn’t have been lonely.”

But, he felt the lack. Whether he calls it loneliness or not, he knew he was carved out by something. Isn’t that loneliness?

“Did you like being a spy?” Did it hurt you to leave it behind, you want to add. 

“No more than for the fact it was something I was good at. I’m good with swords and metal, and not much else. It was a start.”

You nod, smiling gently, “I’m not good for much else than sewing.”

The air sits still between you, a calming presence that wraps you up in its arms. At ease, safe, like you usually feel with him.

You talk until your throat’s sore. Youdon’t even realize dawn has come until he pushes himself up off the bed and the soft blue light peeks in as he leaves.

Laying under your blankets to fight the morning chill, you say his true name one more time. Just to taste it.

❆

The drooping pearl of the necklace Yeonjun gave you swings delicately side to side. No matter what, you couldn’t leave it. You hold it out, watching it. Just watching it.

Kai had gotten up under your skin. His words peeled the dressing you had so carefully laid down for yourself. He’d done it so easily that you’re almost angry.

It doesn’t feel good to paint Yeonjun out to be all terrible, because he isn’t and never was. The truth of the situation is that he didn’t expect to end up loving you, or maybe he didn’t expect for his job to involve hurting a human life in any way. In any case, he never meant to break your trust.

But he did. Aren’t you a hypocrite, then? You weren’t telling him everything, either. Even if he already knew what you were, that was a decision you made. Because you were afraid. He was afraid he’d lose you, too. At least he told you regardless. That’s what gets you; he did tell you. Is what you’re doing punishment for that? Is it mean? And yet, if you go to him again, what of the fact that he thinks he can make you come back by pulling strings? That leaves a nasty taste on your tongue. 

You don’t know. Dropping your head, you sigh. For a long time, everything has been bubbling up in your chest. Now, it rises into your throat and restricts your breathing. You don’t know, you don’t know. 

The thudding of booted footsteps has you popping your head back up to find Taehyun in the doorway. His mouth moves in a half-smile to say something until he zeroes in on what you hold in your fist. Eyes going sharp, his face twists.

“Oh,” you say. “You’re back.”

His feet remain planted. He’s so still that it doesn’t even seem like he’s breathing. It sends a genuine chill over you, hair prickling. That look; you recognize what it is, now. You’ve seen it once or twice. So intense that it eats up the oxygen in the room and leaves none left for you.

“What’s that?” he says, crossing the room to snatch it from your hand. He watches it spin and glimmer in the lowlight. Last time he had seen it, he couldn’t help but snap it off your neck. His throat bobs around a hard swallow.

“A necklace.”

“Always him,” Taehyun growls, eyes smoldering. “No matter what I do. What will it take for you to stop fucking wanting him?”

You’d breathe, but it all gets caught in the back of your throat. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“You don’t?” he scoffs, taking your face in his hands. So gentle in contrast with the razors he sneers with. “Bullshit.”

You do. Of course you know what he means. You try to muster up words, but his thumb down the line of your jaw stops them short.

“Look me in the eyes,” he says. Mush-brained, like you always seem to be around him, you do. His jaw ticks and he breathes out a weakened, “Fuck.”

The mattress meeting your back doesn’t even register through the thick, fire-smoke haze of his mouth on yours. You gasp into his mouth, fingers curling into the front of his tunic. That same one you had embroidered. Him, walking around in your touch all day. It makes your belly turn over. 

He licks the seam of your mouth, his hands in your hair and then running up your torso and then squeezing the plush fat of your hips, as if he can’t decide where he wants to feel you, so he devours it all at once. As if he could make up for all the times he wanted so badly to do this, but could not. 

You gasp for breath when your mouths part, kiss so impatient and frantic that it dazes you and leaves your lips smeared. “Taehyun,” you shudder out. He always leaves you stupid and with nothing to say but that. 

He takes your chemise where it lands on your thighs and brings it up. Each inch is scalding and exhilarating at once. When it’s bunched up above your breasts, those intense eyes eat the sight up. All sharp edges and want, but you see how his ears go red.

“I haven’t wanted anything this bad in my whole fucking life,” he says, palm splayed over your ribcage. “I have gone so long like this. Never had anything to want. But I want all of you. That, I need.”

You shake like a leaf in his hands with it; want. “Take it,” you say. It’s good that it’s nothing more than two words, because you don’t trust your voice right now.

 But, really, is it? You think they’re much more than just words. Your head spins so much that the world blurs into lines around you—everything but him and the beating of your heart. 

Instead of devouring you like you thought he would, he thumbs the hinge of your jaw. Yeonjun, as sure of himself as he is, would’ve. But everything about Taehyun is contrary to what you’ve known. Yeonjun was a slow, tantalizing burn because he knew exactly what he wanted to do with you. Taehyun’s all over you like he cannot get enough, a dazzling white-hot fire. And he cannot get enough.

“Are you sure?” he says, the words tumbling out past his lips with trembling urgency. “Because I’m… Don’t play with me. Please, don’t fucking play with me. You want this?”

You’re just as bad as he is. Worse, even. It’s like he takes whatever is inside of you and makes it tenfold. Your skull pounds to the same terrible rhythm as your center. It goes through you in waves. “Taehyun, please, just do something. I do. I do.” 

His fingers are biting as he tugs you down to the edge of the bed, his hair hanging in his eyes. Dark, swirling pools. You drown in them. They’re even better in between your thighs, down on his knees. 

“Tell me where he touched you,” he says, breaths puffing over your inner thighs. 

So he can replace it all with himself. Your blood boils under your skin.

“Did he do this?” he asks. It doesn’t come out vindictive. No—he’s really asking. He wants to know exactly what you like, to make himself exactly that. Why does that set you on fire the way it does?

“Yes.” You run your palm down the length of your belly, slowly, just to feel it and the tingles. His eyes track it the whole way, darting back up to yours when you take his hair in your hands. “Yes, he did. And he was so good at it, Taehyun.” It’s purposefully antagonistic, but your belly tightens as his face falls to shadows.

The first swipe of his tongue is a test. He watches you jump with analytical precision and then applies that like he does everything else—watching. Observing. Another, trying a flick, and his intelligent eyes note how your thighs shake. Then his fingers go tight under your thighs, the cold of him like frostbite, and he dives in. No long drags, no fanfare.

You squeak, but it devolves into a litany of feral sounds. No, Taehyun is not Yeonjun. He reminds you of that in the way he pins you, his arms stronger, in the different way his mouth moves on your cunt. Not at all. It’s like you’re learning how your body reacts anew. 

He does not let you clamp your thighs around his head, does not let you buck your hips, and does not let you breathe.

“Oh—” you start, but your vision tunnels as he takes your clit into his lips. A graze of teeth here, his tall, strong nose against it there. Wholly overwhelming you so that he knows, beyond a doubt, that there’s nothing in this world that you could be thinking about but this. Him. Because he so desperately needs it that way. 

“Taehyun,” you plead with him. Your fingers tug at his scalp, and you’re positive that his jaw must ache, but there’s nothing but an endless hunger that meets your gaze when you find it in you to pry your eyes open and look. “Taehyun, please,” you say, voice cracking toward the end as your belly tightens.

His nose. It sends your body rigid each time he digs in deeper and bumps it up against you. It pushes you closer, closer, and then closer, until you burn all over, nails digging into his muscle-corded forearms to have something to hold as it licks down your spine. The last words you can manage are intelligible—your tongue betrays you.

Taehyun presses a rough hand right below your navel and holds you down through it. He’s the only thing that’s real beyond your hoarse cries and shaking body. Him. 

He doesn’t stop flicking your clit with his tongue until you’re jumpy and choking on your breaths, belly going taut.

The vision of him as he pulls back has stars speckling your vision. His mouth is covered in you, his pupils blown wide. On him, on his perfect, clean-cut face, it’s the lewdest thing you’ve ever seen. Though you’re still floating in a smoky haze, sedated, it sends glowing sparks through you.

His breaths fan over your face as he climbs back up, maneuvering you however he pleases. With his forehead pressed to yours, he half growls, half shudders, “Damn it.”

The words are scalding. You know exactly what he means, because you’re feeling it too. Something as powerful as the sea swallowing you clean, sucking you down to where you know you won’t ever reach the surface again.

You take a hand and run it up the plane of his stomach, feeling and savoring each scar, until you feel his heart. It thuds under his skin frantically. It echoes through your bones, so loud that you might hear it if you strained your ear enough. It tugs at the strings of your heart.

“You’re nervous?” you say, eyeing the mess of his hair, the flush on his cheeks. All so endearingly human. Sweet, even.

“No,” he says. His voice is vibrantly husky and thick. “I’m not scared. I’m just…” His eyes sweep over the sight of you, the spread of your soft thighs and the splay of your hair and the same glazing of the eyes in yours as there is in his no doubt, longingly. There’s a flicker of unsureness, and then he presses his forehead to your shoulder and rolls his hips into you. He lets that speak, the hardness of him. “Good?”

Running a finger over the curve of his ear, you feel the scar tissue left there. “Good,” you say, still partly lost for breath. More than that; you want him all over you. You want him like liquid silver in your bloodstream, heavy but utterly potent.

He fumbles with his pants for a moment, the sword calloused pads of his free hand brushing over your pulse. It stutters under his thumb as he holds it there—checking if you’re feeling it how he is.

“I have been tortured,” he says, wetting his lips and scoffing as if he can’t believe what he’s about to say. “I have been tortured, driven up the fucking walls, by the sound you make when you cum. Since you let him have it in my home, since you let me hear it.” His eyes flash, and then he’s bent you straight in half.

With your thighs flush to your front, your mind goes blank white all but for the very human, very fundamental kick that comes with being so utterly held down. All his brawn is suddenly more apparent now than ever. You press at his hard chest, nothing but his breaths to breathe. “Tyun,” you say, calves on his shoulders.

“Good?” he repeats, his jaw working. The tip of him presses to your entrance.

Taking your lip into your teeth, you cut through the haze and nod for him. “Yes,” you say. “I’m good.”

That’s everything he needed to hear. The thick tip of him presses in first, and then you’re hanging on to each new inch, taking to his shape and size slowly but surely. A sound catches in his chest as his body meets yours, a gravelly curse following.

For a moment, he hangs on and lets you wiggle your hips in circles to learn the feeling. He’s different from Yeonjun like this, too. And then he takes your waist into his hands and begins to fuck you, because hardly could the both of you wait a moment longer. You need, need, need. 

He drops his head and works his hips into you so eagerly that it’d be impossible for him not to brush up against that sweet, saccharine spot inside you. You press a palm over your mouth. Not to quiet yourself—when the world has gone to nothing else but him on top of you, you don’t care. But because you haven’t got a clue what else to do with your hands. You’re clawing, both grabbing him closer and pushing at him. 

“Taehyun,” you whimper. “There—right there.”

Angling his hips, he searches your face. “Yeah? You…” His voice chokes off before he can gather himself again. “Like it there?”

Cupping the back of his head, you pepper kisses and nip wherever you can reach. It’s all your overwhelmed mind can do to thank him.

That deep, trembling feeling starts at the base of your spine. It’s inescapable between him and the bed beneath you, your toes curling in the air and your back going rigid. Everywhere you go, he’s there. Every square inch of you. 

Taehyun’s no better off. “Fuck,” he whimpers. It’s like nothing you’ve ever heard come from his mouth. His head drops into your neck, a procession of something between whiny breaths and growls spilling into your skin.

“I’m…” you say, insides burning up far too much for you to finish that thought. You teeter on the edge just enough to drive you mad, mad enough that falling off feels both like punishment and prize.

He knows, though. “Me too,” he says, voice so tight you think it might snap. Hips faltering, he takes the hair at the back of your skull and tugs your head back just to press a smoldering kiss to your mouth. You know why he’s done it—the sound of his coming undone is muffled into your mouth as he eases up just enough to let your twitching legs down, slipping out. He takes himself into his fist, the slick sounds so obscene they break through your delirium. Belly going taught, the little bit of soft, healthy fat there, he throws his head back and spills over your stomach with a bone-deep sound. 

Both made lazy, you don’t have it in you to move for some long moments. You just listen to the sound of his ragged breaths coming and going off pattern with yours. It’s all you need to hear. All you need to know.

Dazed, you watch him stand to find something to clean you up with. The air is empty, but not bad. Not stifling. He dabs at your belly with a gentle hand, tossing it away. You half expect him to slip out or go lay in his own bed, but he doesn’t. You always did seem to get him wrong, anyway. 

You draw shapes into his skin, talking nonsense with a raspy voice until you’re droopy-eyed and don’t even realize you’re drifting.

❆

Poking through the fabric, you tug the string taut. Another one of Taehyun’s shirts dangles down from your hold.

Something’s happening. You’re not exactly sure what. But he’s hardly here, so something must be. You gnaw at your bitten lip. It doesn’t seem so much like there’s any buzz or mistrust around here anymore, so then what? 

You know that you came here for real war, but the notion of it finally becoming actualized makes your stomach go nauseous. Not to mention the fact that you don’t even know where they’ve gone. That leaves a door of possibilities cracked that you don’t even want to peek into. 

Taehyun can handle it. You know he can. Despite it, you hang on to every moment that he’s not here. What’s that? You decide not to name it, for your sake. 

You thread and you thread, circling the cuffs and then around the neck, letting your mind wander. But not too far. 

A rustle at the tent opening catches your attention, and then Kai’s stepping inside. Your belly doubles over itself. Never once has he come to you. “Is everything okay?” you say, throat tight like you already know. Because you do.

Wasting no time, Kai says, “The prince has been apprehended. But I’d tell you that he’s been given away.”

Silence washes over you as you pause. “What?” you say. Your voice is distant as it comes out. That was not what you were expecting, but it’s not any better. Taehyun’s shirt goes forgotten. 

“For leverage,” he elaborates, “the King has been told about his son's rebellion. He’s been betrayed by one of our own.” There’s a deep sadness in his eyes. Old friends, he had said. “Our general is a cruel, sharp man.”

“What do you mean by that?” you say. The walls spin around you. That’s not right. That’s not right.

Kai doesn’t answer you, but his long, telling look speaks truer than words. Producing a letter, he offers it to you. Yeonjun’s insignia is stamped into wax on the face of it. “I suggest that you read this one.”

Your hand trembles as you take it from him. Yeah. You’d better read it. The cruelty of burning letters hits you like a real blow to the chest. The King has his traitorous son, probably sitting somewhere you haven’t got a clue of, plotting on having his head. So many words—oh, you feel sick just thinking of them going up in smoke now. Yeonjun will die. 

The letter tears with a sickening sound. You don’t have the steadiness in you to open it delicately like you did once.

𝐾𝑎𝑖 𝑡𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑠 𝑚𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑠𝑒𝑒𝑚 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒, 𝑚𝑦 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒. 𝐴 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑎𝑛 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 𝑔𝑙𝑎𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑖𝑡, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑎𝑚 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑎 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑎𝑛.  

𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑑𝑜 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑧𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝐼 ℎ𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑜𝑛 𝑡𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑢𝑟𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑦 𝐼 𝑎𝑚 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑦𝑜𝑢. 𝐼 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑐𝑢𝑟𝑠𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑐𝑟𝑢𝑒𝑙𝑡𝑦, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑚𝑦 𝑜𝑤𝑛 𝑓𝑎𝑢𝑙𝑡. 𝐼 𝑛𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑑𝑖𝑑 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑛 𝑡𝑜 ℎ𝑢𝑟𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑖𝑓 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑚𝑦 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑥𝑖𝑚𝑖𝑡𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑑𝑜𝑒𝑠, 𝐼 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑑𝑜 𝑖𝑡. 𝐼’𝑙𝑙 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦. 

𝐸𝑣𝑒𝑛 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑢𝑛𝑐ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑝𝑎𝑝𝑒𝑟 𝑢𝑝 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑔𝑒𝑡 𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑖𝑡. 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑑𝑎𝑦, 𝑦𝑜𝑢’𝑙𝑙 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑧𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑜𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑜𝑛𝑒 ℎ𝑢𝑟𝑡. 𝐼 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 ℎ𝑢𝑟𝑡 𝑚𝑒, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐼 ℎ𝑢𝑟𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢. 

𝐼 𝑤𝑖𝑠ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝐼 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑠𝑎𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦, 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝐼 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦 𝑡𝑜𝑜. 𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑎𝑚 𝑛𝑜𝑡. 𝐼 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑏𝑒. 𝐸𝑣𝑒𝑛 𝑖𝑓 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑝𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑓𝑢𝑙, 𝐼 𝑎𝑠𝑘 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑡𝑜 𝑎𝑡 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑒 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑠. 𝑇ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑒 𝑖𝑛 𝑚𝑢𝑠𝑖𝑐, 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑒 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑔𝑙𝑎𝑑𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑡. 𝐼’𝑑 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑡𝑜 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑚𝑏𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑒 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡. 𝑀𝑎𝑦 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑢𝑛𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢 ℎ𝑎𝑢𝑛𝑡 𝑚𝑒.

  𝑌𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑗𝑢𝑛

It’s all so sickly sweet, so dramatically him. Hot tears burn down your cheeks, jaw trembling as you make attempts to keep it all in place. Even just to see his handwriting…

You want to close your eyes and pretend that Taehyun would not, but your gut doesn’t allow it. You know the truth. You know that it was Taehyun who deducted it was Yeonjun sabotaging you. You know that it’s Taehyun that so perfectly, so seamlessly hid behind an ice wall for months that you hadn’t a clue how deeply and voraciously he needed to have you. It was him, with his sharp mind—that part of him that is capable of shutting down emotion and acting on brutal, detached strategy. 

A strategist through and through. It was Taehyun who will have Yeonjun’s head.

🪶 ⦂ this is the happiest day of my life (＞＜) i missed them so much. i know how this development is probably making yall feel... so yes i will be needing to hear everything.

← rꫀׁׅܻblogs & asks arꫀׁׅܻ always apprꫀׁׅܻciatꫀׁׅܻd! ♡(ᗒᗣᗕ )՞ →

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[eternalgyu]

TEXTS W BF TAEHYUN

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ taehyun x fem!reader

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ for the loml @slytherinshua have an amazing birthday 😼😼

[pinktyuns]

sleepy spring mornings featuring choi yeonjun

hot.

was the only thought going through your still half-asleep brain as you struggled to blink open your eyes.

it’s so fucking hot.

once you were kinda awake, with open blinking eyes you regarded what the hell was making you so hot. bright washington sun crept through the curtains, sweeping the tranquil hotel room in a beautiful light.

looking to your right, you found the heat source, the culprit.

choi yeonjun, your boyfriend, sleeping ever so peacefully nuzzled into your side, brown hair messy and tussled with sleep, his arm thrown lazily over your stomach, keeping you close to him and his goddamn furnace of a body, his leg draped and entangled with yours under the sheets.

looking at him, seeing his breath rise and fall softly, the pout that seemed to always be on his lips jutting out, you couldn’t help but smile.

it was rare to see him like this, be with him like this, and instead of running away from his heat you brought him closer, wrapping your arms around him as he nuzzled closer to you, burying his face into your neck, his soft breath tickling you.

you brought your hand up to his messy head, smoothing the brown down and running your fingers through it, scratching his head lightly. he exhaled happily and, still seeming to be asleep, moved a little bit so you could see his face.

you felt like the grinch seeing him like this, your heart growing 3 sizes bigger at the sight of yeonjun.

you watched him breathe in and out, softly tracing his perfectly shaped face with your finger. across his brow bone, down his perfect sloped nose, softly grazing his cute little cupids bow, tapping his perfect pout ever so softly.

maybe it was the early morning making you feel your emotions even more so, but seeing him sleeping peacefully, cuddled up to you, lit up by the morning sun, you felt as if you might cry.

dating yeonjun wasn’t the easiest thing all the time, his schedule insanely demanding, your college classes challenging, and sometimes it was hard to just get a 15 minute facetime call these days. which is why you jumped at the opportunity to go with him on tour, seeing him on stage with his members, in what was his happiest element, made you happy even more so.

you were suddenly brought out of your thoughts with a sigh and a stir, yeonjun seeming to be waking up next to you.

cute.

was the only word that could fit this situation. you’d seen it before, sparingly, but yeonjun waking up was the cutest goddamn thing you think you’ve ever seen in your life. a small frown on his face, hair messy but somehow still perfect, eyes still closed, nose scrunched up, the pout on his lips jutting out even more so that you felt the intense urge to kiss it.

you leaned into him, feeling his breath on yours, and placed the smallest, sweetest ghost of a kiss on his perfectly parted lips.

you pulled back, hand still in his hair, smile on your face. looking at him in this light it was insane how someone so perfect could just be walking around on this earth, even more insane that you got to be with him like this and share these moments with him.

“whyd youstop,” a small, deep mumble fell out of yeonjuns perfect lips and into the room.

you scratched his head lightly again, seeing his eyes were still closed, ignoring the fact that his morning voice was somehow deeper than how he normally sounded and it was driving you crazy.

you giggled at him, his little glare on his face over the fact that you simply didn’t kiss him longer.

“i like when you kiss me,” he mumbled again, you caught sight of his ears turning a little red and he buried himself into your neck again out of embarrassment.

you laughed then, a soft real laugh, pulling him even closer to you, wanting to feel his warmth now.

“oh my god you’re literally the cutest person alive, did you know that?” you gushed over him.

you could feel his face growing hotter with the praise and he shook his head, “nuh uh, it’s you.”

you laughed again, “oh my god you’re such a baby.”

yeonjun, finally seeming fully awake, lifted his head at that, pulling his body weight and resting on one of his arms so he wasn’t on top of you anymore, rather, laying on his side regarding you.

you suddenly felt hot again, not from the temperature. it was still crazy to you how yeonjun could go from being the cutest thing alive to staring at you like he was literally going to eat you.

yeonjun smirked, he always thought it was funny how he still made you nervous.

he decided he was done teasing you and suddenly wrapped his arms around you, rolling onto his back and laying you on top of him.

“did you sleep okay?” he asked, his voice soft with adoration but still octaves deep with sleep.

you nodded, feeling shy under his gaze, which he noticed and made him smile up at you, “the only thing is that you’re a fucking furnace, choi,” you pretended to be mad, “i feel like i’m gonna wake up sweating because you’re so hot.”

he laughed, a gorgeous, loud laugh that made butterflies settle in your stomach, and wiggled his eyebrows, “i know, right.”

you rolled your eyes, “you’re stupid.”

he grinned, his eyes practically disappearing with his giant smile, and whispered, “you love it.”

he moved his head forward and captured your lips with his, you practically melting into the soft kiss.

kissing yeonjun always had your head spinning, his lips always warm against yours, making you feel safe and making the butterflies in your stomach go crazy.

yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun. yeonjun.

he pulled away, admiring that spaced-out look you always got when he kissed you, no matter if it was soft and sweet like this one or rough and full of want.

he pulled you closer to his chest, your head laying on top of his heart, listening to the beating.

you both stayed like that in contentment for who knows how long, yeonjun breaking the silence with a small whisper, “i like having you here, like this, with me.”

you smiled on his chest, listening to the soft thump thumping of his heart, “i like seeing you like this, and being here with you.”

yeonjun pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead, your eyes closing automatically and you hummed in response. the both of you finally sitting up and yeonjun grabbing his horn-rimmed glasses from the side table, placing them just on his nose, making him look somehow even more attractive, which you didn’t even know was possible.

he captured your eye contact, holding your hand, his thumb dancing over your skin, “i love you,” he said softly, a big dumb smile on his face.

a big dumb matching one on yours, “i love you, junnie. even if you feel like lava when you sleep.”

he rolled his eyes at that and released you, getting out of the warmth that was your shared bed and standing in front of you opening his phone.

you took the opportunity to ogle him, as any sane person would.

a shirtless yeonjun was a beautiful one, like yeonjun was all the time, but there was something else about him like this, grey sweatshorts (whore) riding low on his hips, honey-colored skin exposed and kissed by sunlight, making him glow, glasses perched on his nose, brown hair the most perfectly messy thing atop his head.

yeonjun didn’t look up, but felt your stare, smirking, “see something you like?”

you blushed, “no.”

he scoffed, shaking his head, “okay liar.”

you giggled, finally taking the opportunity to stretch when there was a soft knock at the door. both of you knowing it was probably staff (or beomgyu coming to bother).

yeonjun grabbed a navy blue botton up shirt and haphazardly pulled it over him, sadly coving up his golden skin, as he padded softly over to the door.

soft words were exchanged and the door closed and he turned with two starbucks cups, smiling at you,

“oh my god, yes,” you said, making grabby hands towards the cups which made yeonjun smile as he walked back over to you, stopping to grab his ipad from the bedside table.

he gave you your drink, the caffeine comforting you after just one sip as he settled back into the bed next to you.

he opened his ipad and pulled up youtube, looking for something to watch. when he made his pick, he rested it on his legs, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and bringing you close.

you rested your head on yeonjuns shoulder, holding your drink and smiling softly.

you looked up at him again, admiring his perfect side profile, and gave him a small kiss on his cheek, making him turn to face you, smile on his lips.

“what was that for?”

you shrugged, “just because.”

he grinned, glasses pushing up on his nose, and kissed your forehead again, all while snuggling you closer against him.

as the sun got brighter in the room, it danced over the white comforter, and lit up yeonjuns hands and coffee cup. it was warm and perfect, just like yeonjun himself.

yea user yawnzzn killed me today so i had to write about it this was not supposed to be this long & it is unedited i just needed to word vomit about him because OH MY GOD!!!

[imagine-a-life-like-this]

Boyfriend!TXT finds out you bias another member

Warnings : mention of an affair, they're a little dramatic but we love them

A/N : I did a Stray Kids version a while ago and promised a TXT version so here it is! Thank you so much for the request. I hope you enjoyed 🥰

@comingupwithacoolnameishard @lethallyprotected @eastleighsblog @abbiestearsricochet @berryblog @th3melthatfell @weird-bookworm @dreamingaboutjisung @the-lemon-boy @nfrgirl @choisoorin @minhoino @retromalum @junebug032 @alyszaen @felixmainacc @dinonuguaegi

[sadnightforus]

[6:48 PM] “Can I sit with you?” 

 His voice startles you out of your concentration that was on your work earlier, but you look up to find the source of the voice and you find that it’s a guy, a handsome one indeed. 

 You’re at your comfort café (although it has been open for just 2 weeks), but it quickly becomes your spot to go to chill at, whether you’re doing assignments, which is something you’re doing right now, or wasting your time away. 

 You have your green tea frappe by your side, a laptop and a phone, focusing on your work until a person came along and shot you a question. 

“Uhm.. yeah sure. Take it easy.” You respond, ashamed by your obvious potential starstruck expression you must’ve made like you’ve seen a god in real time. 

 He pulls the seat, then sits down, dropping his bag onto his lap too as he seems to be in rather hurry mode to finish it. He pulls his iPad out, with a pen and it’s when you notice that he drinks an iced latte. 

“Sorry about that. It’s just, there are no other table and yours is the only one with an empty seat. I hope it’s not troubling you.” He profusely apologizes for disturbing your peace and you ought to scream that you’d let him do that any time as he wishes. 

“It’s no problem with me.” You smile, trying to show that you’re more than welcoming for his presence. 

“I think as a thank you, I should learn my savior's name, if you don’t mind me asking?” He questions, and you think to yourself, smooth. Real smooth. His attention has been pulled from his iPad to settle his eyes on you instead. 

“Y/N, what about you?” Your eyes have a twinkle of amusement, which he can’t help but compliment on it. 

“That’s a pretty name. You’re pretty.” He then clears his throat. “I’m Taehyun.” And he is so pretty, with his eyes, nose, lips and gentleness like that. 

 Pretty boy with a pretty name, that’s what you think. 

“Your name is as beautiful as you too.” You return the smile, although this time you take the initiative to flirt first. 

“You’re much cuter.” He comments. 

“Hmm not so sure about that pretty boy.” And then you ask him. “What major are you in?” 

 You both ended up chatting for a little while, discovering that he took environmental science while you took finances and that you both attended two different universities that happened to be located near each other. You both talk about your common interests; which are music and comment on how good the shop owner’s taste in songs is— the reason why you keep coming back.

 You look at the time, and realize that you both have been talking for almost an hour. 

“I hate to cut the conversation so short.. but I have the work due. If you want to ask anything, don’t hesitate to throw it myself.” And he nods, understanding it as he too, goes back to work on his own notes. 

 The table falls silent, a comfortable silence between two strangers that happened to encounter tonight due to Taehyun unable to grab a table at a famous café shop. He, too, is quiet and doesn’t ask questions. Occasionally, you can hear the pen making noise against the screen as an indication that he too, is also studying. 

 You don’t know how much time has passed, but you’re now done with your assignment. You finally look up to see that the shop has customers coming in and out, never making it quiet. You realize that it’s probably very late too and you want to go home and finally relax. 

 You shut your laptop down and sip on your drink, then put everything into your bag, rechecking to make sure you didn’t leave anything. Taehyun notices, knowing you’re about to leave and he hates the small talk you both had when he wanted to extend that. As you zip your bag, stand up and ready to leave, he stops you by calling out your name. 

“Y/N?”

“Yes?” You quirk your eyebrow in confusion, an adorable kind of confusion from Taehyun’s view. 

“I hate to make this talk so short, so I was thinking if I can get your number.” 

 How is he so smooth? It’s unfair that someone who is as handsome as him also is that charismatic. 

 But you smile before you give your response, after looking at his piercing eyes that eventually turn soft overtime and you think that he must’ve been really shy. You hear his “You’re pretty.” thrown to you mindlessly but you pretend that you didn’t catch it. 

“Sure. But give me your number too.”

 You both end up exchanging each other’s phones to type the number before handing it back to one another. As you brace yourself and finally get his number, you lock your phone, then look up to see Taehyun smiles at you. 

“See you later.” You wave to him, heart is full of a feline-appearance who manages to charm you tonight with only his smile. 

“See you.” He waves back, his eyes never losing its sparkle as he watches you turn around and start heading out of the café shop, then disappears out of his sight. 

 You consider tonight a win as you get to drink your favorite order, complete your work and get a cute boy’s number. 

COPYRIGHTED BY SADNIGHTFORUS, 2025

A/N: know by meyou... i believe in you. also, my second fic of taehyun to thai's song. a coincidence? i think not. also i wrote this in june last year lol

reblogs, comments and likes are appreciated!

[blossom-hwa]

melody of the heart [1] | k.th

pairing: Taehyun x fem!reader genre:  fluff, a pinch of angst, regency era!au, nobility!au warnings: period typical misogyny word count: 17.8k notes: — this is for all the bridgerton girlies who have been going insane just like me <3 highly inspired by francesca/john's burgeoning romance from the first half, so hope you all enjoy! — some of the dialogue has been lifted from the show—I do not claim any credit for it. — this takes place in the same universe as my duke!yeonjun story, if you'll have me :) feel free to check that out as well! When your father calls you home from the continent to join the London season, for the first time in your life, you nearly throw a fit. You are not just the daughter of a viscount—you’ve made a name for yourself in England and abroad with your prodigious talent at the piano, having since childhood performed for royal courts far and wide. You have traveled far and beyond most other ladies of your rank, and to have your career halted all for the sake of marriage to a man who will likely force you to quit your craft is unthinkable. But all your life you have lived without raising a hand to your father, and so when the letter comes, you return home for the season, hoping and praying to make it through without stirring the waters.  Enter Taehyun Kang, Earl of Addiston—recently titled, in search of a wife, and as tired of the season already as you are. During a chance meeting at the season’s third ball you grow to know each other, and as time passes you grow to like each other, a mutual respect forming when you learn the depths of one another’s passions in the arts. In Taehyun you find a respite from the men who would clip your wings for the sake of finding a perfect wife. In you Taehyun finds a kindred spirit who would respect him for himself, and not the lands in his name. Together you navigate the grueling social activities of the London matchmaking project as acquaintances, then as friends, and maybe, just maybe— As lovers, too.  Part 1 >> Part 2

Series Masterlist | TXT Masterlist

As the white double doors begin creaking open, only one thought rings clear in the mess of your mind. 

I cannot be the diamond. 

Cannot. Will not. Your father wishes it, as does your governess and the entire unfamiliar extended family crowding your home for the season, but you can’t. Not least because you can’t handle the attention—just the idea of being presented to the queen makes you want the earth to swallow you whole—but also because the longer you can delay finding a husband, the longer you might still find a shred of freedom lingering on your fingertips. 

It's not fair. Late at night you lie in bed, staring at the dark ceiling as angry tears prick the corners of your eyes. Why is it that men should have the freedom to do as they wish, but women must be pushed into the confines of the household, meant to marry up just to add or promote a title for the family name? All you ever wanted to do was play the piano, and even though your father only saw your life’s passion as a way to make money, at least you could do it. You were good at it, too—you’ve played for the royal houses of Europe, met queens and kings and nobles of so many courts, and while you never quite loved being the spectacle of a child prodigy that your family painted you as, at least you were allowed to play. 

But now your father, who rarely contacted you since your mother died five years ago, suddenly breaks his frosty silence to demand that you come home, because the royal checks you’ve been receiving have now begun to dwindle and the only purpose you can now fulfill for your family is to become some rich gentleman’s meek wife. And to make matters worse, you won’t see a penny of the money you made yourself. It’s going to your dowry.

It won’t even be yours. 

What is most upsetting is that he’s not even entirely wrong. Not about the dowry—you’re still smarting over your hard-earned money being turned over to some nameless, faceless gentleman of the ton—but about your musical escapades on the continent. People were eager to watch a child prodigy perform. They cooed and smiled over you like the zoo attraction you were. But as you grew older, you also noticed the invitations dwindling, the interested courts growing smaller, the payments decreasing. All because you were a woman nearing marriageable age, and to be such a prodigy was no longer suitable for your gender. 

For all your usual mild-mannered shyness, this knowledge makes you want to break dishes against the wall. 

But since you’ve returned to England, you’ve kept your mouth shut as you are wont to do. You’re not the type to scream and rage when things don’t go your way. Silence comes more naturally to your lips than shouting and you find yourself nodding quietly to your father’s demands more often than not. Still, though, you can have this. You can have the fact that you will not be the diamond. 

You were worried about it at first. Your name is not unknown by the people of the ton and judging by what little you’ve heard of Lady Whistledown’s papers, your return has stirred some gossip around town. Enough gossip that people speculated the queen might crown you her diamond on the sole basis of your celebrity—and as self-centered as it is, you were anxious about that. But it turned out you actually didn’t have to worry, because as it turned out, you are terrible at being a debutante.

Everything about it hurts. The feathers on your head, the slim, constricting dress, the jewelry choking your neck and wrists and the pale, slippery gloves that slide against your fingers—you certainly don’t wear gloves when you play the piano. The headdress only accentuates your terrible balance and when your governess had you practice your walk for the first time, you’d tripped every other time you went down the hallway.

Which was not ideal, not for you or for your family. Because even though you don’t want to be the queen’s diamond, you also don’t want to be the one girl to trip on her face in front of dozens of people and the queen herself. Only instead of motivating you to be better, the thought of tripping kept making you more and more anxious to the point that you felt like you’d throw up each time you saw your debutante gown.

“Why don’t you treat it like a performance?” your governess had finally suggested, wringing her hands at your latest miserable attempt to walk down the hallway with those godawful feathers on your head. “As though you were to play for the queen.”

The thing is, you have performed for the queen. Not recently, given that you’ve been on the continent for a good many years and only returned a few months ago, but you did perform for her when you were much younger. But that’s—different. Somehow. Your governess and certainly your father might see both situations as the same, but for some reason the idea of parading down an aisle amid dozens of prying eyes, all the while wearing a tuft of white feathers on your head, is terrifying to you in a way that playing the piano for hundreds or more isn’t. 

It doesn’t make sense. Which is why you didn’t bother trying to explain to your governess why exactly her well-meaning advice wouldn’t work, just gave her half a smile and an empty nod as you prepared to try once more. And it had gotten better the more you practiced. Over time you got used to the swaying of the feathers above you, the tiny steps you must take to avoid the headpiece falling to the floor, and all the other millions of tiny things you never thought you’d have to pay attention to. Now, though, as the doors swing fully open, revealing the queen and her entourage at the end of the aisle, framed by every single eye in the room trained on you—

You freeze.

Time stretches and dilates all at once. Opulent ornaments blend with the walls, gold almost seeming to drip onto the white in a way that, to your spiraling mind, looks like blood. The sea of faces before you blurs into a mass and your heart is pounding, your breath coming out in shallow gasps that can’t be doing anything flattering for you in this stupidly tight gown. 

“Y/N.”

Your aunt hisses your name with her unfamiliar voice and suddenly the room comes back into focus. Too much focus. Now everything is too bright and too defined and the gold of the decorations seems to be blinding your eyes. You accidentally lock eyes with the queen at the end of the aisle and all you can feel is the need to throw up. 

But you can’t. 

Slowly, slowly, you take the first step. Then the next. Feathers sway and your head is starting to spin uncomfortably, but you keep your eyes trained on the end of the aisle, something akin to a smile (or at least a grimace) pasted upon your lips. 

You halt after what you think is the right number of steps, just a short distance in front of the queen. The same muscle memory that lets your fingers fly over piano keys helps you into your low curtsy, head dipping just enough to be respectful, not so much that the awful headdress tips over. Wait a moment, your governess’s voice echoes through your muddled mind. Count five seconds, then rise. 

Slowly, you stand, meeting the queen’s appraising eyes once more. Her expression doesn’t change. Relief prickles your chest—maybe she doesn’t recognize you, which means she won’t crown you the diamond for the sole purpose of your fame, or maybe she’s just disappointed and unimpressed—and that relief continues to spread as you stumble out of the room, dimly aware of your aunt following just behind you. 

“Well, you weren’t the diamond,” your aunt sighs. “But at least you didn’t fall. “

Yes, you think fervently as you accept a glass of water from a footman. And thank the heavens on both accounts. 

. . . . .

It’s only the second ball, and Taehyun is already not enjoying the season. 

Ugh. He slips into a darkened corridor and finally allows himself to take a deep breath, the sounds of the party muffled behind the walls. “How did you do this so easily?” he mutters to the phantom of his brother in his mind. 

Taemin’s casual grin smiles back at him from behind his mind’s eye and despite himself, Taehyun almost laughs. He knows the answer already. Taemin enjoys this—the socializing, the talking, all of it. His brother’s easy grace and pleasant manners are easily employed in the ballroom, where he can spread charm at will and revel in the attention he receives in reciprocation. It’s not that Taehyun can’t find his way around a conversation or take an easy turn around the dance floor. He can. It’s just that he doesn’t enjoy it the way Taemin does.

But even then, Taehyun still doesn’t understand how Taemin navigated the marriage mart so seamlessly. Surely he must have at some point grown fed up with the shiny veneer of the debutante season, the incessant pestering of the mamas when they found out the heir to one of London’s earldoms was newly seeking a wife. None of that seemed to bother Taemin that much, though. Two months he went through it with only the barest complaints, and by the third month he was happily married to a woman of a similar temperament. While they might not have been a love match at first, they were certainly an amicable and good one. 

Meanwhile, it’s been barely two weeks since the season started and Taehyun already wants it to be over.

He’s pushed it off enough, though. For three years he’s been allowed the excuse of first finishing his studies, then having to put the estate’s affairs in order—the news of the inheritance was rather abrupt, after all, and completely unexpected. He’s only related to the Addiston line distantly through his mother, not even his father—which is why he was able to inherit even as a second son—and they’d had no idea of the connection until the solicitor had shown up to their door with the news. But it’s been three years. With the weight of an estate on his unexperienced shoulders, the next logical step, to society, would be to find a capable wife to share the burden. His parents agree. So does his brother. 

And so does Taehyun. He just wishes the process of doing so wasn’t so…performative. So obviously meant for matches of rank instead of people. Taehyun knows that if he hadn’t gotten that chance inheritance, hardly anyone would look twice at him. He might be the son of an earl, but he’s only a second son, and the son of a second wife at that. While he’s certainly not at the bottom of the barrel of potential husbands, without his inheritance, he’d be garnering far fewer glances than he does now. 

Far fewer. 

In another better world, maybe it would be easier to find someone with whom he has a genuine connection without having to wade through all the social climbers in this one. Because that’s what he wants. A connection. Not someone who will simply look at his title and inheritance and pursue those instead of him.

But in this world, that might just be an elusive dream.

Taehyun sighs. It’s worse now that he lives alone and has grown used to his solitude. Sure, he has friends who come to barge in on him at different times of day—Kai and Beomgyu maintain little sense of decorum around him, in contrast to the Duke and Duchess of Hastings who, though good friends of his by now, do not come outside of calling hour without prior notice. They keep away the lonely spells in an estate that still doesn’t quite feel like his. But the silence isn’t unwelcome for a quieter person like he, and it remains a sharp contrast to the gaiety of the ton during the season. 

Which brings him back to here. Now. In some empty corridor of his host’s home, away from the staged smiles and bright lights of the ballroom. Somewhere he certainly shouldn’t be, but as long as he doesn’t get caught, Taehyun has little intention of returning to the fray until he can get his thoughts back in order. The muffled chatter of the party is still too loud here so he continues down the hallway, following the echoes of silence and…

Music?

He halts. Sure enough, now that he’s far enough from the noise of the ballroom, he can hear a soft, sweet melody coming from somewhere ahead of him. It’s haunting, lovely, and as he leans toward the sound he begins to recognize the notes of one of Beethoven’s sonatas. Part of the Tempest sonata, actually. One of the most difficult, and one of Taehyun’s personal favorites. 

Taehyun’s feet begin to move, the spell of the sonata carrying him to the end of the hallway. One of the doors has been opened just a crack and it’s easy to tell that’s where the secret pianist must be playing from, the melodies spinning into the air beyond the sliver of an open door.

Common sense tells him he should walk away. The musician seems to be alone—perhaps tired of the party, just like he—but nonetheless, that can’t spell good fortune for him, especially if they are a woman. Being caught alone with an unmarried debutante would only spell trouble for both of them, more her than he, and for her sake, at least, he can’t ruin her prospects just because he couldn’t turn away from her music. 

But something deeper keeps him rooted in place, breaths quiet and shallow, eyes half shut as he leans toward the door as much as he can without tripping over his feet. He enjoys fairy tales, though he is wont to admit it, loves stories of fantasy and magic, and he can’t help but compare these melodies to the spells he used to read about. For surely the pianist must be weaving a spell into the air, into every accent and crescendo, every passage of the sonata effortlessly magical to his ears. 

Taehyun loves music. He loves it almost as much as he loves literature. He took lessons and can play the piano as well as, if not better than many of his peers, but even he is nothing compared to the musician in that room. Nothing compared to the spell of their fingers dancing across the piano keys. 

Too soon, the music ends. And with its conclusion comes the realization that Taehyun needs to return to the party soon, or his absence will be noted—he’s already spent too much time away, if the two movements of the sonata he’s listened to are anything to go by. 

Taehyun forces himself to step away from the open door, from the lovely melodies and mysterious musician within. He doesn’t turn back even when a new piece begins, though soft notes follow him down the hall, all the way back to the party.

. . . . .

“Lady Taylor. Miss L/N.” The smile in front of you is sparkling in a way that leaves you dizzy. Or maybe that’s just the bright lights overhead. Either way, it is doing nothing to soothe the ache beginning to pulse between your temples. “I do not believe we’ve had the pleasure of being introduced.”

No, you haven’t. You don’t recognize this face or its too-bright smile. “I don’t believe we have,” you return, curving your lips as much as you can. “To what do I owe the pleasure…?”

“Mr. Haynesworth,” he says, angular eyes narrowing into what could be a pleasant expression if you weren’t so tired. “I noticed you were quite a fine dancer, and wanted to ask if you had a spot on your dance card that I could perhaps take.”

Without really meaning to, you glance at your aunt. She looks back, mostly impassive, but gives you a small nod. Yes, allow him. 

Your tongue tastes bitter even as you smile at Mr. Haynesworth. “Yes, I do. In fact, my next dance is free, should you like to dance the quadrille.” 

“An excellent choice,” he replies, and you have to try hard not to roll your eyes as he begins to sign his name on the card. What wouldn’t you give to be at home, in bed, purposely thinking about everything and anything but the season and your daughterly duty to find a husband? Lady Arina Park isn’t here to subtly nudge you in the direction of a music room and as far as you know, none of the Tillings play an instrument, so you can’t even snatch a quarter of an hour alone with your thoughts and music like you did at the last ball. Besides, your aunt would certainly scold you if she noticed you were gone, just like last time. 

It's not like it matters, though, because the orchestra music is fading, which means the next dance is about to begin, and you won’t be getting a chance to take a break. Mr. Haynesworth looks up from your card with a little smile and offers a hand. “Just in time,” he says genially. You do your best to feign enthusiasm as you take it. 

I hate this, you can’t help thinking, watching other couples take to the floor. You like to dance—honestly, you enjoy almost anything that has to do with music—but right here, right now, with all the eyes trying to discern who will win Her Majesty’s seasonal title of diamond of the first water (because of all the girls presented this season she still hasn’t picked one, and you harbor a nasty hope that she never will), it’s too much. The bright lights of the ballroom. The slippery silk of your gloves against your hands. Mr. Haynesworth’s pleasant smile as he asks you questions against the background of the orchestra’s new tune, each of them polite, noncommittal, and as meaningless as the last. 

“How are you finding the party tonight?”

I think the candles are trying to burn right through my eyes into my brain. “Quite lovely indeed.”

“How are you finding London in general? It must be a change from abroad, no?”

Boring. Stifling. Rainy. “It is very different, Mr. Haynesworth, though not unpleasant. I imagine that with time, I will grow used to it too.”

“So you do intend to find a husband this season, if you say you will be here for some time?”

If my father didn’t want me husband hunting, I wouldn’t be here. “Yes, that would be my intention.”

“I hope you will come to enjoy London then, Miss L/N. It is an old city, and it certainly has its charms.”

Of course. “Of course.”

He spins you under his arm and you come to face to face, his nice smile suddenly very close to your eyes. You almost stumble—muscle memory had been leading this dance as you tried to answer his questions through your growing headache, and in the midst of that you’d forgotten this part. “I read Whistledown,” he says, completely oblivious to the brief spike in your heart rate. 

Inwardly, you sigh. Ah, so you’re either going to ask me about piano, or ask me about the fact that the queen still has not chosen her diamond of the season.

“She says you are quite the pianist, Miss L/N.”

…You would have preferred questions about piano over the nonexistent diamond, it’s true, but what exactly are you supposed to say to that? “I have been playing since I was young.”

“A true prodigy, then. I wonder why the queen has not yet chosen a diamond, though there is clearly one right here.” Despite the compliment, his thin eyes suddenly seem too narrow, the planes of his face too sharp as he leans in ever so slightly. “I hear you spent quite some time with other royal courts during your…little tour. How were your travels?”

You nearly pause. Your head still hurts and between the dancing and conversation, your mind is being split onto two different tracks, so it takes you a moment to realize why Mr. Haynesworth’s words offended you.

Little tour.

You do not like how he said the words little tour.

It sounds like how your father talks about your performances abroad. It sounds like when your aunt tells you to stop practicing, it’s time for your French lesson. It sounds like when your cousin sticks her head into the music room and asks you to play more softly since it’s distracting from the conversation downstairs. 

Dismissal. Accidental or intentional, it doesn’t matter. It’s dismissal of you, your talent, your work, your passion.

Maybe you would have preferred questions about the nonexistent diamond instead.

“I enjoyed traveling and meeting new people during my tour, though it would have meant little without the music,” you reply, unable to rein in some of the bite to your words. “Music is my passion, Mr. Haynesworth, and the piano my medium. I’m afraid without either, my life would retain little meaning.” And for the first time that evening, it seems that the higher powers are on your side, because the tune of the quadrille is fading, which means the dance is ending. Keeping your current smile plastered firmly to your face, you sweep into a brief curtsy. “I must see to my aunt, Mr. Haynesworth, and so I take my leave. It was good to meet you.”

Lies, all lies, but it gets you off the dance floor without another word from him. Weaving blindly through the crowd, you follow the paths of fewest people until the chatter of the ballroom is just a faint buzz in your ears and blissful silence fills the air instead. 

A rush of air leaves your lips all at once and you put a hand to your chest, where your heart is beating just a little too uncomfortably fast. You’re outside the house, in the gardens, but in almost full view of the front of the home where carriages are lined up, their footmen at the ready. It would be lovely to just be alone, but in public that cannot be for fear of compromise, so you take solace in what little solitude you have now under the moon and stars.

You close your eyes for a long moment. You hadn’t realized earlier how hot the ballroom felt, but you certainly know it now as cool night air breezes across your face turned up to the sky. The stars twinkle overhead, comforting pinpricks of light so unlike the burning intensity of the candles and chandeliers within, and all at once you’re hit with the overwhelming thought that you absolutely do not want to go back inside. 

“I’m not going to survive this season,” you mutter, then quickly glance around—no one should have heard that, it sounds so whiney and childish. But in the moment it feels so true. And for two terrible seconds, you feel an overwhelming lump in your throat, a tightening in your chest—

No. You will not cry. Not here, not now. You bite back the tears, suddenly feeling so alone even in the solitude you sought. No one is on your side. Not your father, your own flesh and blood. Not the aunt who accompanied you here. Not even your governess, who is sweet and kind but ultimately bows to the whims of your father. Only your mother ever understood your calling to music and she’s dead, five years buried underground, and for all you have healed since that dark time, you still miss her. 

You miss her so, so much. 

One deep, shaky breath. Then another. Slowly, your heart rate calms into something that feels more normal, and you tilt your head back up to the sky, letting the midnight blue wash across your vision like a soft blanket. It comforts you enough that you almost don’t hear the footsteps against the stone path until they’re just a few feet away from you.

“Good evening,” a quiet, unfamiliar voice says. 

Conversation. Exactly what you wanted to avoid in the ballroom. Somehow, though, it doesn’t seem so daunting out here. Maybe it’s the silence. Maybe it’s the sky. Maybe it’s the gentle quality of this man’s quiet voice that makes it seem like he seeks the same solace from the night that you do, and nothing more.

“Good evening,” you reply, not quite looking at him as you dip a small curtsy. “Forgive me. I was only—”

“In need of some quiet?” He turns around and between the dark hair and half smile and large eyes, your breath lodges in your throat. But any nervousness at this man’s handsome face fades away when you see the softness hidden in his expression, the gentle uncertainty caught between his broad shoulders. “I have been in search of it all night.”

For all your previous mood, this man’s small smile makes you want to smile too. And so you let your lips curve slightly, more than you thought you could without forcing it, and as you do they begin to curve more. “It seems we are of the same spirit,” you say, and the night seems to laugh quietly with you both. “Miss Y/N L/N, good sir.”

“Taehyun Kang, Earl of Addiston.” He bows slightly. “I am pleased to make your acquaintance.”

. . . . .

A comfortable silence has fallen, and Taehyun has little desire to disturb it, but your name keeps rolling around his head, a little too familiar for someone he’s only met today. There’s something about your face, too. He’s certain the two of you have never been introduced—he’s fairly sure he would have remembered your smile, which seems to complement the night sky perfectly—but at the same time…

Someone opens the door to the mansion and a few orchestral notes follow them outside. Orchestra. Music. 

Oh. 

“Might I ask…” he begins slowly. He almost wishes he could take back his words when you turn to him, but he’s already started, so he continues. “You are Miss Y/N L/N, the celebrated pianist?”

You lips part, like you didn’t expect the question. Embarrassment starts to crawl up his cheeks—it would be mortifying if you said no, even more so if you had no idea who he was talking about—but then you nod, surprise still coating your features. “Yes, my lord. I am.”

Oh. Oh. This is—maybe worse than if you’d said no. Because this means Taehyun is in the presence of someone famous, someone with celebrity, someone he admires and respects even though they’ve never met face to face before—

Calm down. “I saw one of your performances a few years ago,” he says, forcing his voice to remain level. You open your mouth to say something but Taehyun barrels on because if he doesn’t say it now he’ll never say it again. “I was in Germany to visit a friend. We went together. I, um—” and this is when he stutters, because of course it is—“I found your performance most impressive. Particularly Beethoven’s Appassionata. Your interpretation…it was perfect to me. There was a delicacy to it that made it uniquely beautiful.” He coughs and prays the night hides the warmth that has crept into his cheeks. “I suppose I just wanted to say that you are a very talented musician, and you must have worked very hard to come so far.” 

You look away, and in that moment Taehyun does fear that he said too much. He might have presumed a level of familiarity you weren’t comfortable with, or maybe you don’t appreciate being complimented in public, or maybe he just said the wrong thing—but then you look back at him, and even with only the moon and stars to light your face, it’s plain to see the smile curving across your lips, pleased and proud and limited only by the shyness and humility of your nature, evident as you give him a small curtsy again. “Thank you very much, my lord,” you say, and if your smile was complemented by the night before, now it sparkles at brightly as any of the stars. “It means…so much to me that you would say such a thing. Truly.”

Taehyun smiles. A little more shyly than he’d like, but no matter. “It is not a difficult thing to say these things,” he replies. “Your performance then was impeccable, as I’m sure it is now.” And now that the connection has been made, a memory from the second ball of the season suddenly returns, of a dark corridor and a beautiful sonata. Were you—? “If I may ask, were you the one playing the piano at the Kims’ ball just a week ago?” 

You blink. “You…heard that?”

All of a sudden Taehyun realizes the implications of his words—that he was at the ball, that he decided to leave to wander the dark corridors, that he heard you playing and not only didn’t hasten away at once but stayed to listen for long enough to make this connection. None of them paint him in the best light, and one of them is far worse than the others, if taken the wrong way. “I’m so sorry,” he apologizes, and if his face wasn’t warm before, it certainly is now. “I happened upon it by accident. I was only trying to find some quiet away from the ball—” 

“Much as you were just now,” you interrupt, and Taehyun almost flushes even more before he sees the small, amused smile on your lips. 

“Yes,” he agrees sheepishly. “I heard music coming from one of the rooms and it was…beautiful. The Tempest is one of my favorite of Beethoven’s works. You played it wonderfully, and I couldn’t help but stay and listen for some time.” He bows his head. “I hope I have not been too forward or made you uncomfortable. If I have, I do apologize.”

“Do not apologize,” you say, a bashful hint returning to your own voice that Taehyun finds very endearing, especially when you duck your head slightly. “Please, my lord. I am only…deeply honored that you hold me in such high regard.”

Taehyun relaxes, his own smile growing wider. “Earning that regard was not difficult,” he says. “Even my friend, who has much less knowledge of music than I do, was fairly blown away, and almost inspired to take piano lessons because of you.”

You laugh. “You must jest, my lord.” 

“I do not,” he replies, laughing as well. “He is not here tonight, but perhaps someday you two will meet, and his praise will be even more effusive than mine.” 

“In that case, I eagerly await that day.” You look at him, a question in your eyes. “Might I ask, my lord—you mentioned that you have some knowledge of music? Are you a musician yourself?”

“Oh, I…dabble.” Taehyun laughs a little. “With the piano. I quite enjoy it, but I am nowhere near as good as you.”

“But you have a musician’s ear and heart,��� you say, conviction in your tone, and Taehyun finds himself rooted under the strength of your gaze, under the stars, under the night sky. “You appreciate the art and the work that goes into it, which is more than I can say for most.”

Taehyun opens his mouth. Closes it. Opens it again. “I suppose you are right.”

You duck your head a bit, shoulders suddenly hunching. “I apologize, if I was too forward—”

“Not at all!” he says quickly. “No, not at all. Forgive me, it has simply been a long night and my conversing skills are somewhat frayed at the moment. I appreciate your words, Miss L/N. Very much.”

For a moment, you seem to search his face, like you’re looking for something. Whatever it is, you seem to find it, and when you do, your shoulders thankfully relax. “I was only speaking what I felt to be the truth, my lord. And, for what it is worth…” You pause, your expression somewhat strange before it settles into a genuine smile. “This conversation is one of only a few that I have truly enjoyed tonight.”

He laughs, your quip unexpected but welcome. “It must have been a long night for you too, then?”

“You have no idea.” This time, you two laugh together. “Actually, I’m sure you do. There are only so many times you can be asked the same questions and give the same answers, or hear the same topics and remain sane.” You shake your head. “If the queen plans to choose a diamond this season, I wish she would just hurry up and do so. It seems to be all anyone can talk about nowadays.”

Taehyun raises an eyebrow. “She has not yet chosen one?”

“Apparently not.” You shrug. “My cousins say Lady Whistledown writes about it in every issue. I suppose it is a source of gossip, but…to be quite frank, I do not understand why the queen’s opinion on one woman reigns so supreme in the marriage mart. Should not the couple choose each other based on their own perceived merits, and not solely because the queen approves of one but not the other?” A short pause, and then your shoulders slump. “Though perhaps I only do not understand because I have been away for so long.”

“Well, I quite agree with you,” Taehyun says frankly. “I do agree that the queen’s approval would be a feather in anyone’s cap, but anyone who only sees the title of diamond and nothing else, I believe, would not make a happy marriage, even if the diamond agreed to the match. I don’t believe a title alone is any sort of solid foundation upon which to make a partnership.” 

You look up, meeting his eyes, and a moment of understanding seems to pass between the two of you. A smile that looks much like relief curves your lips. “I agree, my lord,” you say softly. “It is a relief to know that I am not the only one of these opinions.”

Taehyun came outside for fresh air, for a respite from the chaotic buzz of the party inside. He came outside for solitude. But though he found conversation instead, he finds himself feeling better than he perhaps would have, had he immediately gained the silence he sought. Your quiet, frank honesty is as refreshing to Taehyun as the night air itself and he realizes he would love to continue your conversation, if not for—

“Y/N!”

Both of you start at the sudden shout of your name from the mansion doors. An older woman comes striding out, a stranger to Taehyun but evidently more familiar to you. Not altogether welcome, though, it seems—your shoulders tense and immediately your gaze shutters somewhat as the woman draws closer. “Lady Taylor,” you say quietly, turning back to Taehyun with a smile significantly more strained than before. “My aunt, and my chaperone tonight.”

He nods once. “I see.”

“Y/N, I’ve been looking for you for half the night,” Lady Taylor scolds as soon as she is near enough, which does little to endear her to Taehyun after she interrupted his time with you. “Why do you insist on disappearing so?”

“My apologies, Aunt Taylor,” you say. Taehyun doesn’t miss the brief clench of your fingers at your sides. “I went to find some fresh air, and then found myself caught up in conversation with Lord Kang.” You gesture to him. “Lord Kang, please meet my aunt, Lady Taylor, Viscountess of Wentworth.”

Taehyun bows politely as your aunt curtsies. “A pleasure, my lady. I am Lord Kang, Earl of Addiston.”

Her eyes widen ever so slightly at the mention of his title, and he bites back a sigh. So she knows of his estate and inheritance, too. “Charmed, my lord,” is all she says, though, before turning back to you. “Please forgive my interruption. Y/N, you must come back inside. The ball is not yet over, and several gentlemen are still waiting to dance with you.”

You glance down at your dance card, then back up at him, your face twisted in apology. “I must do as my aunt says,” you say quietly. “Though it was a pleasure to make your acquaintance, my lord.”

“And the same to you.” He smiles as easily as he can, and maybe he’s just hoping, but your smile seems to become a little less forced too. “It is getting late and I’m sure your dance card must be full, so I will not keep you further. However…” He inclines his head slightly, respectfully. “Perhaps if we meet again, I hope you will indulge me if I ask you to save a dance for me, so that we might continue our conversation where it left off?”

This time, he’s sure he’s not imagining the softening of your face and the return of some sparkle to your eyes. “I would be honored to, my lord,” you say, curtsying. “Have a good night.”

He bows. “I wish the same to you.”

. . . . .

The last few days since the Tillings’ ball have been dreary and wet, full of gray clouds and rain. Today, though, when you wake, the clouds have cleared to reveal the bright sun set against a shimmering blue sky. When your cousins come bursting into the music room to take you on a walk, you don’t even argue—the afternoon looks beautiful, and even you are itching to go outside. 

“You spend so much time cooped up in that little room,” your oldest cousin scolds when you meet everyone in the entryway, though there’s a smile on her face so you try not to take her words the wrong way. “You need some fresh air.”

You smile back as best as you can. “I appreciate the concern, Lilly, but worry not. I’m as eager to see the sun as you are.”

It is pleasant, feeling the sun on your skin after days of grey skies and intermittent rainfall pattering on your windows as you tried to practice. Truth be told, by yesterday you were feeling restless, too, so you can’t even blame the children of your family for wanting to run around as they do now, leaping happily under the blue sky. 

You stick to the back of the group, quietly watching Lilly and your other cousins try to corral their children under the watchful eye of Aunt Taylor. Jieun looks particularly frazzled as she tries to chase down her youngest and you take pity on her, scooping up the child the next time she runs past and giving her little forehead a small tap that makes her giggle. “Be careful,” you warn gently, handing her to a grateful Jieun. “Don’t get hurt, or your mother will worry, yes?”

It's not just your family. It seems as though the entirety of London has come out to enjoy the wonderful weather. The park is green and bright and almost seems to shimmer under the sun, and laughter and chatter fill the air with faint birdsong. You may enjoy spending your time cooped up in that little room, as your cousin says, but you are glad you came out today for the sun on your skin and the joy in the air.

“You are good with the children,” Lilly says beside your ear. You start—you hadn’t realized she was so close until she spoke. “Won’t it be wonderful when you have children of your own, and they can all play together?”

Please, Lilly. “Maybe.” 

“Sound more excited, will you?” she laughs. “You can’t mean to not have children. Or are you already married to your music?”

Your smile is wavering, but you heave it back up with the teeth-gritting reminder that she doesn’t mean it badly, she doesn’t mean it badly, she doesn’t mean it badly. “I’m not married to my music, insofar as I cannot marry an intangible thing,” you respond as dryly as you can. “I’m not sure even the priests at Gretna Green would agree to perform such a ceremony.”

“You know what I mean,” Lilly says, scooping up one of her children. Both of them seem to eye you in a way that makes you feel defensive. “When will you emerge from your music room, Y/N, to see the rest of the world around you?”

That’s not fair, you want to say. I have emerged from my music room. I just find that I don’t necessarily enjoy what—or who—awaits me outside.

Like the incessant demand that you marry and produce children for an unnamed man who will control you for the rest of your life. 

“I see the world as much as I like to,” is all you say instead, but Lilly has already been distracted by her toddler trying to wiggle out of her arms. You leave her to it, and drift behind everyone once more. 

It’s not that you don’t want to have children. It’s not even that you don’t want to get married. It’s just that you resent the fact that it is your only option. You don’t even think you’d mind marriage and children if you could still live with your music, but the way everyone else talks about it, it’s always one or the other. Give up marriage for the piano. Give up the piano for marriage.

Not that the first option is even a choice. 

You take a deep breath. Breathe in the fresh air, the scent of flowers and grass. The sky doesn’t seem as blue as before, nor does the sunshine feel as welcoming, but it’s still there, and it’s still pleasant enough. Lilly means well, and she doesn’t mean to be dismissive. You’re still unmarried and still not the diamond. The world isn’t ending.

Jieun’s youngest finds her way behind your skirts once more, giggling when you turn around to chase her down. A smile finds its way to your face that isn’t forced because she really is adorable, and her little laughs soften your expression when you swing her up and warn her again not to hurt herself.

“Miss L/N?”

You whirl around. As does the rest of your family. 

“…Lord Kang?”

There he is standing just a few feet away, looking as surprised to see you as you are to see him. “Miss L/N,” he says again, a smile spreading across his face. “I didn’t expect to see you, though I suppose you and your family are here to enjoy the weather as well?”

“Yes, we are.” You smile back, trying not to cringe when the toddler still in your arms tries to grab at your hair. Thankfully, Jieun appears to relieve you of her child in that moment, whispering hurried apologies into your ear as she whisks past. “My family thought it would be good for the children to see the sun.”

“And for you!” Lilly whirls into the conversation with a beatific smile and the outward countenance of nothing but an angel. You grit your teeth as she continues. “My cousin spends far too much time indoors at that piano of hers, she hardly sees the sunlight.”

Lord have mercy. 

“Well, I have heard she is quite accomplished at it,” Lord Kang replies easily, that smile never wavering on his face. “Something has clearly come of all those hours she has dedicated to practicing.” He turns to you with that lovely smile and those dark eyes, and while he was handsome under the night sky, it can’t compare to what he looks like now, under the sun. “It seems good fortune has brought us together before the next ball of the season, Miss L/N. Would you mind if I joined your walk, so that we might continue our conversation from the other night?”

Well. You blink once or twice, casting a glance at your aunt, who seems about as confused as you are. In the absence of her input, you choose to assent. “Of course, my lord. We would be honored.”

And so the walk continues, though Lilly and Jieun continue to shoot you confused and excited glances every so often. You ignore them as you best you can, which isn’t hard when Lord Kang is beside you. 

“It’s good to see you, my lord,” you say. “How have you been since the Tillings’ ball?”

“Well enough, though the rain has been somewhat dragging on my mood over the past few days.” He shrugs. “Such is London, though.”

“It is a bit dreadful to think of, if this is what it’s always like,” you say, only half joking. “More time for me to practice, I suppose, though I must admit I am very happy to see the sun.”

“And to be with your family?”

“…Of course,” you respond quickly, though you’re sure he can see exactly how you feel about the group you’re walking with, judging by his half smile. 

“I understand,” he says quietly. “It is not always easy when one’s kin doesn’t quite appreciate the depths of one’s interests.”

You quirk an eyebrow. “You have experience with it too, my lord?”

“With music, somewhat,” he admits. “But more so reading. My family is well-read, of course, but many of them cannot fathom that I would usually rather be in my library than socializing with the ton.”

“I would agree with your sentiment.” The two of you laugh. “What do you like to read?”

It takes a little prodding, but your question eventually launches Lord Kang into a spiel about classics, about authors old and new, novels and philosophy and literature of times so far in the past that you almost can’t fathom it. Truth be told, you don’t know much about what he speaks of—you enjoy reading, but your books of choice tend to be the popular novels of today, and while you recognize some of the classic titles he mentions you can’t say you particularly enjoyed them. But listening to him talk about them, hearing the passion behind his every word, is captivating in a way that you’d never have thought possible when speaking of Plato and Aristotle. And in the midst of this, he never makes you feel out of place or stupid. He answers each of your questions with enthusiastic verve no matter how basic they are, and by the time his friends are calling for him from the end of the park, you’re both so wrapped in your conversation that you almost don’t hear them. 

“I’m afraid I must go,” Lord Kang apologizes when you finally point out the two men making their way towards you. “I promised I would meet them later.” He suddenly looks a little shy, which is a more endearing expression than you’d have expected on his handsome face. “I hope I did not bore you with my talk. I know this subject is not the most interesting to everyone and I can get…carried away with it.”

“Not at all,” you respond immediately. “Truly, not at all. I love hearing about the interests that others have, and clearly this is a deep one of yours. I enjoyed our conversation immensely.” You draw a short breath. “In truth, it was…very good to speak with someone other than my family today.” Your smile, though not forced, feels considerably smaller than it was before. “I do not have many friends in the ton, as I was abroad for so long. Thank you for taking pity on a poor soul such as I, and speaking to me as one.”

Lord Kang steps forward and takes your hand gently, so gently. When he looks into your eyes it is as though he sees all of your soul and your breath catches at the warmth of his palm against yours. “It was never pity,” he says sincerely. “You are a wonderful person with whom to speak, and if I may presume, the beginnings of a very good friend. I look forward to the next time I may see you.” 

You fight to keep your voice steady against the rush of heat in your cheeks. “And I you, my lord. Have a wonderful evening.”

The setting sun perfectly frames his lovely smile. “Until next time, then.” 

The pressure of his lips against your skin lingers long after he has disappeared, long after you have returned home, and long after you have retired for the night.

. . . . .

Beomgyu pounces the moment they’re all seated at the club. “So who was that?”

Taehyun really should have expected this. Even with that knowledge, though, he still has to roll his eyes. “Who are you talking about?” he can’t resist asking. Beomgyu is annoying. He has to be annoying back, sometimes. 

“The girl you were with. The debutante.” Beomgyu grins, undeterred. “Who is she?”

Taehyun gives up. He’ll never win against Beomgyu. “Miss Y/N L/N,” he says, conceding defeat. “We met at the Tillings’ ball a few days ago.”

Kai’s eyes widen. “The pianist?” 

“That’s the one.” Taehyun grins. “I told her you were almost inspired to take lessons because of her.” Kai groans, and Taehyun’s smile only widens. “She was flattered.”

“And I bet she laughed,” Beomgyu adds. 

“She did.”

Kai just screams into his hands. 

“I don’t believe that you didn’t make a fool out of yourself either,” Beomgyu accuses amidst Kai’s muffled screaming. “You admired her at least as much as he did, probably more for your love of music. How much of an idiot did you look when you realized it was her?”

Taehyun is an honest man, but only to a point. “Not much at all.”

Beomgyu snorts, but that’s when their drinks arrive, so Taehyun thanks the higher powers for intervening before he was forced into revealing the truth of warm cheeks and night air. “And how goes you and your lady friend?” Taehyun asks before Beomgyu can pick up his line of questioning again. “Last I remember, she was threatening to slit your throat with your own letter opener. Have there been any recent developments?”

It’s Kai’s turn to laugh while Beomgyu scowls. “Oh, are there,” Kai snickers. “It’s only the most interesting thing in Whistledown right now, second only to the continued absence of a diamond in the field of this season’s debutantes.”

Taehyun raises an eyebrow. “It’s made it into Whistledown?”

“An entire paragraph on the row they had at the last party in the country, right before the season started.” Kai grins. “I know you aren’t a fan of the gossip papers, Taehyun, but you have to read this one. I’ll send you a copy tomorrow. I can only wonder why Whistledown decided to wait until this issue to write about it, though perhaps such a sensational story needed several weeks to perfect.” 

Beomgyu scowls even harder as Taehyun laughs. “I don’t know why that woman Whistledown can’t mind her own business,” he complains. “It was a private argument.”

“A private argument in the gardens outside the host’s home, loud enough that we heard it from inside,” Taehyun says dryly.

“Yes, well, she’s irritating,” Beomgyu snaps, taking a gulp of his drink like he needs it to clear his memory. “Why do you keep asking me about her? I don’t want to talk about it, she’s infuriating.”

“You sure talk about her a lot for someone who says he doesn’t want to talk about her,” Taehyun smirks. “Also, you’re the one who tried to embarrass me first.”

Beomgyu growls. “It’s just ridiculous that she’s still angry over something from when we were children!”

“I don’t know, Beomgyu.” Taehyun shakes his head, hiding a smile. “I was there, and that was a lot of cake. And it washer birthday.”

“Yes, well, she threw dirt at me after that!”

“It sounds to me like you’re still pretty hung up over something from when you were children, too.” Kai sips at his drink, eyes glittering amusedly over the glass. 

Beomgyu just glares at both of them. 

“Alright, we’ll stop.” Taehyun snickers. “At least until I read the copy that Kai’s going to give me.”

“Read all you want.” Beomgyu rolls your eyes. “It’s one paragraph. And from the look you were giving the L/N girl earlier, that’s not even going to be the most interesting part of the paper to you.”

Taehyun blinks. “What?”

“She’s been in the papers,” Kai says. “She’s famous, remember? Whistledown gave her a whole half paragraph when she returned to town and her father announced her debut.”

Taehyun resists the urge to hit himself over the head. If he’d been in the habit of reading the gossip papers, maybe he wouldn’t have been so damn blindsided when he spoke to you at the Tillings’ ball the first time. “I suppose that makes sense.”

“I always make sense,” Kai sniffs, pointedly ignoring both Taehyun and Beomgyu’s snorts. “But how is she, as a person and as a debutante? I’m quite curious as to the persona behind the world-famous pianist.”

Taehyun opens his mouth, then closes it. Takes a sip of his drink. How exactly should he describe you to people you haven’t even met? You’ve only spoken twice—does he even have the right to say anything? “She’s very sweet,” he eventually says. “A bit shy, I think. It’s interesting—she doesn’t seem to enjoy being in the spotlight, though she clearly enjoys piano and performance. But she’s very humble, and I think she’s a very bright young lady.”

“Not without her own sort of wit and charm, then?” 

Beomgyu’s looking at Taehyun in a way he isn’t quite sure what to make of, but he answers anyway. “Very much so. You would probably enjoy a conversation with her.” He smirks at Beomgyu over his glass. “She’d probably like you, against her better judgment.”

Beomgyu cackles. “Of course she would, I’m a joy to be around.”

“You’re certainly something to be around, though I’m not sure I’d use the word ‘joy,’” Kai intones, taking a sip of his drink. “Is she adjusting to London well? She was abroad for a good many years.”

A snippet of your conversation from earlier comes to Taehyun’s mind. Your admission that after spending so much time away from London, you don’t have many people with whom to have a simple conversation with, just as simple friends. “She seems to be fine,” Taehyun replies slowly. “Though she mentioned it was a bit difficult to make friends after so long abroad.” He can’t imagine how hard the season must be for you, with a family who doesn’t respect your passion and no one to really confide in. For all he teases Kai and Beomgyu, he can’t imagine navigating life without them.

“The Duchess of Hastings was in a similar situation before she married Yeonjun,” Beomgyu says, and he’s giving Taehyun that strange, discerning look that he couldn’t decipher before. “Why don’t you introduce the two? Her Grace also quite enjoys music, I think they would get along quite well.”

“Invite her to the Hastings’ gathering next week,” Kai adds. “Of course ask the duchess first, but I’m sure she’d be happy to extend the invite.”

That’s actually brilliant, and Taehyun is privately put out that he didn’t think of the idea first. The more he thinks of it, the more he’s certain that you and his cousin could be good friends. “Yes, I’ll do that,” he says, half-rising out of his chair. “I’ll write to the duchess as soon as I can.”

“Surely not now?” Kai raises an eyebrow at Taehyun’s half-standing position. “You still have the whole night, there’s no reason to leave your drink unfinished.”

Taehyun flushes and sits back down. Kai’s comment makes complete sense—why was he standing up so urgently, anyway? “Of course,” he says, taking a sip to hide his embarrassment even though it’s definitely not fooling anyone. “By the way, Kai, how are your family affairs going? Surely your uncle still isn’t trying to lay claim to any part of your inheritance.”

It’s an obvious ploy to distract from his own embarrassment but Kai thankfully takes the bait, immediately putting forth an impassioned spiel about his arguments with his uncle’s idiotic solicitor that would put any of Shakespeare’s soliloquies to shame. It’s easy enough to laugh along and commiserate with Kai’s troubles that Taehyun allows his mind to wander a little, to the thought of you and the duchess meeting, to the beautiful music that is sure to follow, to the smile that will hopefully adorn your lips when you meet another woman who appreciates music as much as you. 

“You’re smiling an awful lot, Taehyun,” Beomgyu says, bringing Taehyun’s attention back to the present. He’s smirking a little and so is Kai, but Taehyun for the life of him cannot understand why. “Did you find Kai’s story really that funny?”

“No, I’m sorry.” He sips his drink, gesturing for Kai to continue. “I just got a little lost in thought.”

Kai keeps talking, and Taehyun goes back to listening. In the back of his mind, though, he’s hearing soft melodies in the darkened corridor of a mansion, and seeing the night sky twinkling above. 

. . . . .

Maybe someday receiving callers will no longer make you feel like flying to pieces. 

Today, however, is not that day. 

Four gentlemen callers—one of them Mr. Haynesworth, with whom you almost couldn’t hide your displeasure at seeing. The other three were pleasant enough and mostly inoffensive, but by the time the fourth caller came, you were running out of ways to begin small talk and based on your aunt’s subtle glare in your direction, it had probably started to show. 

It’s somewhat amusing, if not also somewhat depressing, how bad you are at speaking with strangers. You’ve performed for royal courts and houses of nobility for years, but when it comes to carrying a conversation, you can only bumble your way through inane small talk for so long before you run out of the headspace for it. Though privately, you think that’s a little unfair—it seems only right that it would be the caller’s job to ensure the conversation kept going, since they were the one who made the call, so you shouldn’t have to put in all the effort. But based on every glare or sniff or cough your aunt sent in your direction whenever the conversation faltered, that apparently is not the case.

It’s over, though. At least you think it is—it’s nearly five and no one has showed up since the last caller left. And if it isover, that means you have no one to entertain for the rest of the day. Your governess has already promised to bring your dinner to your room, and you plan on locking yourself in your music room for the rest of the night after that.

It’s like a reward.

“The biscuits are almost gone,” Aunt Taylor says, standing up from the settee. “I will have a servant bring more.” She fixes you with a stern stare. “Don’t slouch. It is not quite five, and you may still receive another caller yet.” She then sweeps out of the room, and once she’s gone, you slump into the cushions a little more, ignoring your governess’s fretful eyes. 

As if anyone would come calling now, really. Ten minutes to five, which means hardly enough time to begin a conversation once the initial pleasantries were dished out even if someone arrived right at this second. You sink a little further into the couch. Aunt Taylor won’t be back for another couple of minutes at least. You can take at least that long to be comfortable. 

Sooner than you’d like, footsteps sound in the hall outside. You quickly pull yourself up, smoothing out your dress, and await the renewed presence of your aunt. 

Only it isn’t your aunt. You blink when a footman enters instead, a card held in his hand. “A caller, my lady,” he says, squinting at the card. “Lord Kang, Earl of Addiston.”

What?

Of course, it is then that your aunt decides to sweep back into the room. “Another caller?” she asks sharply as a trailing servant places a refilled plate of biscuits on the table. “Who?”

Thankfully, your governess has recovered from the surprise more quickly than you have. “A Lord Kang, my lady,” she says. “Earl of Addiston.”

Your aunt throws you a sharp glance. Inwardly, you wilt a little—she’ll be sure to interrogate you after this, asking you to recount every last detail of your and the earl’s conversation yesterday in the park even though you already told her everything you could remember last night during dinner—but for now she says nothing as she nods to the footman. “Bring him in, please.”

For some reason, when you stand, your heart begins to race. You force yourself to take slow, deep breaths. It may be Lord Kang, but he called with only five minutes—now less—left on the clock. Surely he can’t have much to say. 

Though, a little voice in the back of your mind says, you’d much rather talk to him than any of the four who came earlier today.

Footsteps sound lightly in the hall, thankfully keeping you from pursuing that train of thought down unsavory paths. But then Lord Kang appears in the doorway, looking as handsome and gentle and polite as he has every time you’ve spoken to him, and it’s all you can do to keep your voice steady as you welcome him to your home. 

“Lord Kang.” You curtsy, your smile widening in a way that comes more easily now than it has all day. “Welcome. I hope you have been well since we last spoke.”

“I have been, and it is a pleasure to see you all again,” he replies, bowing politely. His eyes meet yours and, in the sunlight streaming softly through the window, they almost seem to sparkle. “I apologize for calling so late in the hour, but I had some business I had to attend to before I delivered this to you.” He produces a small envelope from a pocket and extends it to you.

You look at your aunt, who seems equally bemused as you. “If I may ask, my lord, what is this?” you ask, feeling the smooth paper between your fingers. 

“My cousin, the Duchess of Hastings, is hosting a small party next weekend,” he says, either ignoring or not hearing the collective half-gasp in the room at the mention of the duchess. “She and the duke have just come in from the country for the season, and she is holding a gathering for some friends and family. I mentioned that I had met you, and she was quite excited to extend you an invite—she is also an avid enjoyer of music and wonderful pianist, so I am sure you two will get along very well.”

You feel a little lightheaded. Sure, you’ve performed for royalty, but you’ve never been on close terms with any of them. You were very clearly the entertainer and they the entertained, with very little chance to cross that line even if you were of a mind to. But now Lord Kang is offering you the chance to become acquainted to a duchess, just a step below royalty, and who loves music and is a pianist at that—

One corner of the envelope digs into your finger. Just a slight pain, but enough to remind you that this is real and not a dream.

A quick glance at your aunt earns you a subtle but very emphatic nod, so you look back to Lord Kang with a smile wider than it has been all day. “Please tell the duchess that I would be delighted to come,” you say. “Thank you for the invite, my lord. I do look forward to this event.”

“It is my pleasure.” Lord Kang smiles, and you don’t think it’s your imagination when you muse that it might be a little brighter than it was before. It’s certainly not your imagination when you briefly think you might like to look at that smile for a lot longer. But then the clock chimes and the smile falls, replaced by a sheepish expression. “Apologies again for calling so late, my lady.”

You shake your head. “It was no inconvenience at all.”

“Be that as it may, I will not keep you longer than the calling hour lasts,” he says, sweeping a bow. “Good day, Miss L/N, Lady Taylor. I look forward to seeing you again soon.”

. . . . .

“Taehyun!”

Taehyun turns to the sound of his name, not bothering to hide the wide smile spreading across his face when he sees who called for him. “Your Grace,” he greets as his cousin comes closer, her eyes sparkling. “It’s good to see you.”

She waves a hand. “Dispense with the formalities,” she sniffs, and then they both laugh. “How have you been? Oh—remind me before you leave, but my footman will help bring some of the books I need to return to your carriage.”

“That would be wonderful, thank you,” he says sincerely. “I also brought some of my own books to recommend, as well as the ones you asked for. And I’ve been well, though I’ve learned that the season is rather more…daunting, than I would have expected.”

The duchess nods sympathetically. “I don’t honestly believe it’s fun for anyone,” she admits. “Except maybe the dancing. But there are plenty of young ladies this season who would be a good match for anyone, if Whistledown is to be believed. Speaking of.” Her gaze wanders to the entrance. “Is that her? The debutante you asked to invite?”

Taehyun turns around, catching sight of a familiar face, and smiles. “Yes, that is.”

You step into the room with a sort of trepidation that Taehyun sorely understands. In the moments before you see him, you look somewhat lost, your own eyes wide as you take in the whole room. Your expression seems a bit overwhelmed so Taehyun wastes no time in catching your eye, and when you recognize him something like relief seems to pass over your face. Somehow, you two meet in the middle of the fray and for one strange moment Taehyun finds himself almost breathless. “Lady Taylor. Miss L/N,” he greets, pressing a soft kiss to your gloved hand. “I’m so glad you were able to come. Please allow me to introduce you to Her Grace, the Duchess of Hastings.”

Lady Taylor curtsies, as do you. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Your Grace,” she says, her strong voice carrying just a hint of awe. “I am Lady Taylor, Viscountess of Wentworth, and this is my niece, Y/N L/N, daughter of the Viscount L/N.”

“It is wonderful to meet you both,” his cousin says, beaming widely. “And especially an honor to have met you, Miss L/N. You’ve caused quite a stir in town with your own fame here and abroad.”

Surprise flutters across your expression, replaced with a sort of embarrassed pride that Taehyun finds very endearing. “Your words do honor me, Your Grace,” you say, voice soft and shy, something of a far cry from the animation you displayed during the Tillings’ ball, or during your brief promenade in the park. You don’t look frightened, though, just somewhat in awe, so Taehyun brushes off his initial concern. “Particularly since the earl has mentioned that you are a lover of music, too. You give me high praise.”

Taehyun watches his cousin laugh and blush a little, and happiness bursts in a small bubble in his chest. She’s settled beautifully into her role as duchess and into her life with Yeonjun, but she’s still looking to widen her own circle of friends after spending so long abroad. The two of you begin to converse, your own shy face animating the more you speak, and with a smile and quick excuse, Taehyun ducks out of the conversation, heading toward the other end of the room. 

Yeonjun catches his eye first. “Taehyun!” he calls, beaming wide. 

“Your Grace,” Taehyun replies, settling into the circle that includes the duke, Beomgyu, Soobin, and Kai. “How have you all been?” 

Yeonjun pulls an exaggerated frown. “Hasn’t my wife told you to dispense with the pleasantries when we are among friends?” he asks, and Taehyun laughs because yes, she did exactly that. “Come, have a drink.”

Taehyun accepts the proffered glass and takes a sip. “You really pulled out all the stops for this,” he says approvingly, swirling the amber liquid inside. 

“What can I say?” Yeonjun shrugs airily. “My wife organized this. The least I could do is help make the event a success.”

“With expensive alcohol,” Soobin deadpans. 

“Exactly.”

Next to Taehyun, Beomgyu coughs very strangely. It almost sounds like he’s saying something like head over heels, actually. Then he yelps and Taehyun looks down just quickly enough to see Soobin’s foot pressing hard onto Beomgyu’s. 

Kai and Taehyun exchange glances. Taehyun has to look away to avoid bursting into laughter. 

“Don’t worry, Beomgyu.” Yeonjun beams beatifically over his own glass of expensive alcohol, sharp eyes glinting at his cousin. “Someday you’ll find a lady who will send you into fits of apoplexy with her beauty and wit, and on that day you’ll understand. Or maybe you’ve already found her.” He adopts a thinking expression. “Who was it that Whistledown mentioned? The lady from your childhood, Miss—”

Beomgyu lets out an incomprehensible noise somewhere between a screech and a snarl, and if they weren’t in Yeonjun’s own home, Taehyun thinks Beomgyu might have jumped the duke. As it stands, though, they begin bickering, which leaves Kai, Soobin, and himself to look at each other with raised eyebrows and exasperated smiles. 

“Let’s step away from the rabble,” Soobin suggests, and the three of them drift a short distance away. “I don’t understand how I’m related to them, sometimes.”

“Well, every family has its own set of strange relations,” Kai mutters. 

“You would know,” Taehyun says, and they all snort. 

“Do the inheritance squabbles still show no sign of ending?” Soobin asks curiously. “I would have thought by now that it’s become abundantly clear your uncle has no real claim to anything your grandfather left.”

Kai rolls his eyes. “Unfortunately not. But let us not speak of it now, please. Not in polite company,” he says, indicating the rest of the room. “Join me at the club sometime, and I will update you on all of it.”

“Of course,” Soobin says, dipping his head in apology. “How about you, Taehyun? How goes the season? I know you intended to find a wife by the end of it.”

Without really meaning to, Taehyun’s gaze wanders to the other end of the room, where you are still engaged in lively conversation with the duchess. “It is tiring in a way I did not really expect,” he replies. “Taemin didn’t complain much when he went through it, at least. But…” He pauses, wondering how much to tell. “I have met some very interesting young ladies.”

Kai snorts. Taehyun flashes him a short glare. “What?”

His friend doesn’t back down, just raises one mischievous eyebrow over his drink. “Well, I just think that I would say there’s one young lady that you find more interesting than all of the others.” 

Taehyun’s ears burn. He very purposely avoids looking in your direction again. 

“Well, do tell.” Soobin cocks his head, his own eyes glinting. “And don’t spare details.”

“There’s not much to tell,” Taehyun snaps, ignoring Kai’s snicker. “I’ve been speaking to Miss L/N, is all. The pianist,” he clarifies, and Soobin’s eyes widen in recognition. “She’s a very lovely young woman. Accomplished, not just with the piano, and very kind.”

“So lovely, actually, that he asked Her Grace to invite her today,” Kai adds. 

“Which one is she?” Soobin asks, ignoring Taehyun’s hiss of you suggested inviting her first! “Is she the lady speaking to the duchess now, with the rather dour-faced woman behind her?”

Taehyun sighs in defeat and nods. “Yes, she is.”

They all turn together, and almost at the same moment, the duchess turns in his direction as well. She catches his eye and immediately starts to head his way, bringing a small group with her. Kai glances at him with an eyebrow raised, but all Taehyun can do is shrug with similar confusion.

“Lord Kang,” she says as soon as they’re near enough to speak. “Mr. Huening. I understand that the two of you have seen Miss L/N perform before in Germany?”

They nod. “It was a most impressive performance,” Taehyun says earnestly. “A lovely program, played beautifully and wonderfully well.”

“Incredibly so,” Kai chimes in. “In fact, I was almost inspired to take music lessons because of it.”

You look supremely embarrassed, but the smile on your lips is still sparkling in your eyes in a way Taehyun hasn’t seen yet. “So you are the friend Lord Kang mentioned when we first met,” you say, and Taehyun has to laugh even as Kai flushes in embarrassment. “Oh—please do not be embarrassed, Mr. Huening. Your words do me a great honor, truly.”

“You are far too modest, my lady,” Taehyun replies, and while everyone’s attention turns to him, he keeps his eyes fixed on yours. “The praise is well earned, I hope you know that.”

“Which only means that the lady should honor our humble request,” Lord Jung says, a twinkle in his eye. “We were just asking that she take a turn on the pianoforte for us. A private performance, if you will, from one of the most accomplished musicians in our society. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for many of us, after all.”

A chorus of agreement sounds from your little group and begins to ripple outwards to the rest of the room as well. People begin to turn, expectation and excitement bright in their faces, but Taehyun glances at you only to find your expression somewhat frozen. 

All at once he remembers the dark night at the Tillings’ ball, the exhaustion clear in your face and your voice when you admitted you were searching for quiet, too. Are you tired now in the same way? He subtly inches a little closer to you and whispers lowly, “You do not have to if you do not wish to.”

You look up at him and your expression clears, eyes turning soft as you smile at him. “Worry not, my lord,” you reply. “I would love to perform. I was just momentarily overwhelmed—I wasn’t expecting quite so much enthusiasm. I do thank you for your concern, though.”

Taehyun smiles, shaking his head. “You are too modest,” he repeats. “The enthusiasm is only to be expected with a name such as yours. I am excited to hear what you play for us, too.”

You don’t have the chance to refute his praise because his cousin is taking your arm and leading you to the empty piano, the rest of the room excitedly whispering behind you. Taehyun watches you sit down at the keys, running your fingers over them with an almost reverent touch, your head bowed slightly over the sea of black and white as though in prayer.

And maybe it is a prayer, Taehyun thinks. Reverence paid to your love, music—like one paying thanks to their god. The thought is beautiful, and as you straighten slightly, positioning your hands at the instrument, he can’t help but admire you more. 

He doesn’t recognize the piece you play. It’s a lovely work, the quiet melody evocative of the night and dark while short, bright stanzas bring to mind the stars, and as your fingers waltz softly across the keys, Taehyun loses himself in the beauty of the music and the beauty of you. It is not that you weren’t beautiful before—far from it, actually—but seeing you in your element, with people who clearly appreciate your work and talent, is a spectacle Taehyun knows he will never tire of watching. It isn’t just the music. It’s the way you play it, the way you move with the melody—it’s the way you embody the music with your whole being that adds to the beauty of the moment, and the loveliness that is you. 

You finish the piece to silence, everyone’s collective breath hushed as you coax the last note from the piano strings. For a long moment, even after the final echoes of music have faded away, you remain bowed over the keys, eyes closed, hands suspended in the air before they drop softly to your lap. 

The first clap hardly breaks you from your reverie. Even as the applause grows, even as you curtsy to the shouts of Brava filling the room, you still seem like you are being pulled from the loveliest dream. Briefly, Taehyun wonders what it would be like to be in that dream with you—would it be like floating among the stars, letting their soft light wash over his body, or would it be like lying on a field of green grass at night, staring up at the moonlit sky?

You meet Taehyun’s eyes and in a moment you seem to jerk awake—your smile widens, your expression brightens, and he can’t help but do the same as you curtsy again and again. All the time his eyes never leave your face, his mind never leaving the beauty of your performance. 

Kai sidles up to his ear and snorts when Taehyun barely notices him. “You are going to court her, aren’t you?” he asks without preamble. 

“Yes.” Taehyun doesn’t even turn his eyes away from you to reply. “Yes, I am.”

. . . . .

At the start of the season, you’d hoped that the daily parade of balls, gatherings, promenades, and callers would die down a bit as the weeks went on. The season itself is six months, already half a year—you really thought there would be no way that the steady stream of events could continue for so long. 

This, apparently, is not the case. 

It’s been a month and there is no sign of the flow ebbing even slightly. Even when there aren’t massive balls that the entire ton is invited to, there are still the smaller gatherings—small parties, invites to dinner, promenades in the park—and even during the events where only the women are present, the talk always seems to turn to the season, to the debutantes, to engagements and marriage, and most of all, the fact that the queen has still not chosen a diamond. 

You’ve heard all manner of stupidity about this last topic of gossip, and it honestly annoys you more than anything else you’ve seen during the season. If the queen hasn’t chosen a diamond by now, you’d like to say, perhaps that means she simply does not plan to. But apparently the idea of a diamond being absent for the entire season is simply unthinkable to the mamas of the ton, and so after the separation of the sexes at every dinner party you attend, you’re forced to listen to them run the topic into the ground. 

The duchess’s gathering last weekend was a lovely respite from such talk. It was a much smaller gathering, mostly friends and family of the duchy who no longer have much of a stake in the season or who have lived long enough for them not to care. You were very lucky to have gotten an invitation to it at all. It was the first event you attended that you truly enjoyed from start to finish and you walked away from it with both a lingering happiness, a possible good friend in the duchess, and a promise of a call from the lord who invited you to the gathering in the first place. 

Even now, you can’t stop the rush of heat to your face when you remember his sincere compliments after your performance at the duchess’s. The way his large eyes sparkled so earnestly, his words sweet but respectful—it is true that you have only known him for a few weeks, but in that moment, you remember thinking that with every meeting your estimation of his character only seems to improve. And it isn’t just because he is effusive in paying you compliments for your performances. Lord Kang…he sees the person behind the performer, the hard work behind the talent. Of course it helps that he is somewhat of a musician himself—you’d love to hear him play sometime—but he clearly respects the work anyone puts into their own craft, from what you gathered in the conversations you shared with others at the party. 

Before you left, he had found you again and asked, somewhat shyly, if you enjoyed reading about music history or theory. When you responded yes to both, he told you he had several volumes on the subjects in his library, and would be happy to lend them to you if you wished. 

Aunt Taylor was not pleased by your stammering reply. Neither were you. But it was such a kind gesture that it took you aback for a good few moments, and by the time you had finally managed to convey that you would love that, you felt a true mess. Lord Kang didn’t seem perturbed by it at all, though. His smile only widened, and he said that then he would have to call sometime the next week, to see you and bring them to you. 

Your governess is certain he means to court you. So do your cousins, though Aunt Taylor has forbidden them from gossiping about it as it isn’t a sure thing yet. You aren’t quite as certain as they are, but deep inside, battling with the part of you that fears marriage and its shackles of responsibility, another part of you hopes that she is right.

The prospect of Lord Kang’s call is really what keeps you going through the seemingly endless nights of dinner parties and mindless chatter, small talk made with family friends you hardly remember and debutantes who either talk about topics you don’t know or care little about, or who look like they want to be there about as much as you do. You find a few kindred spirits among those who are bold enough to whisper their disdain aloud, though, and they make the time more worth it. 

Still, when the morning of Lord Kang’s call comes, you can’t help but feel as though a new light shines on the day. Cousin Lilly slyly remarks that you look more excited than usual as she removes her toddlers from the drawing room in anticipation of calling hour, and even Aunt Taylor’s hissed instructions to sit straight or you’ll turn a perfectly good suitor away doesn’t dampen your mood much as you settle into the couch, watching servants flit about with last minute preparations. 

Just a few minutes after the clock strikes three, a footman enters the room. “Lord Kang has come to call, my lady,” he says. 

You force yourself to breathe properly as your aunt tells him to bring Lord Kang in. For once, you thank the heavens for your aunt’s beady-eyed attention to detail. While her sharp critiques may sting more than they help when directed at you, it means that the room is clean and bright. Lord Kang should find himself most comfortable when he comes in. Or so you hope. 

Lord Kang enters the room with little fanfare, but with an abundance of quiet grace that, for all your earlier nervousness, immediately calms your nerves. After the initial greetings, he remarks on the careful décor of the room and pays compliment to your aunt, who actually looks briefly stunned before she accepts his praise. You’re smiling widely by the time he turns to you—maybe too widely for your aunt’s liking, but you can’t help it—and dare you say it? His eyes seem to sparkle a little more when he looks at you. 

“My lady,” he says, kissing your hand. “I trust you have been well since we last saw each other.”

“Quite so, and I hope I might say the same for you,” you reply. Honestly, you’re quite proud of yourself for keeping your voice so steady when your heart leapt so wildly the moment his lips touched your knuckles. 

“You may,” he says, eyes crinkling with a little mischief. “And as promised, I have brought you the books I mentioned when we spoke last time. I do hope you enjoy them.”

“I’m sure I will,” you say, taking the small stack of books with delight. Their worn covers speak of frequent and fond use, you note, scanning the titles embossed on their spines. “Oh!” you exclaim, sliding one of them out of the stack. “Oh, I’ve been wanting to read this for quite some time.” You beam up at Lord Kang. “Thank you so much, my lord.”

“It is my pleasure,” he replies, a lovely soft smile on his lips. “And, please, take your time reading them. Do not endeavor to return them sooner than you’d like—I’ve read them all, so you need not rush.”

“You are most kind,” you reply sincerely. “Oh, which reminds me.” Placing the books on a nearby table, you pick up a few sheets of music from the drawing room piano. “You mentioned last time that you had not heard the piece I played, and that you found it quite beautiful,” you say, extending the music to him. “I thought…I thought you might like to have the music. If you wanted to learn it yourself.”

Lord Kang takes a moment before he accepts the music from your hand, which makes you a little nervous—what if he doesn’t care for your gift? There’s no way it really compares to the volumes he’s lent you, you think miserably, but it’s all you could think of to give in return. But then he looks up from the black notes inked on the page, and that lovely smile of his has widened along with his bright eyes. “Thank you so much,” he breathes. “This is…the most perfect gift, my lady. I hope you will not mind me borrowing it for a time.”

“Oh, do not worry about returning it,” you say, smiling. “This is a new copy—I have my own for myself. This one is for you.”

“Well, in that case, I know what I will be doing when I return home,” Lord Kang replies, and the two of you laugh. “I can only hope to learn this piece half as well as you have.”

You laugh again, hiding a shy smile behind your hand. “Again, my lord, you flatter me too much.”

“No, I fear the world does not flatter you enough.” His words are so sincere, so earnest that you momentarily find yourself at a loss for words. And it’s then, of course, that you notice you’re both still standing. You haven’t even offered him a seat yet. 

“You really are too kind,” you reply, internally screaming. “Please my lord, do sit. We have some refreshments if you should like any, and our cook can prepare others if you are feeling particular.”

Lord Kang truly does have perfect manners, you note as you sit down together. He compliments the chef, your aunt, your governess, all so quickly and smoothly you barely have a moment to bat an eye. And then, when you’re floundering a little for a way to begin a conversation, he again takes the lead and engages you easily with a question about the composer of the music you gave him. 

It’s so easy to talk to him. Not just because he’s a wonderful conversationalist, which he is, but you feel comfortable around him in a way that you haven’t felt with any of the other suitors you’ve entertained over the past couple of weeks. Part of it is your shared interests, of course, but he listens to you with an attentive and respectful air that makes talking to him so much easier. It doesn’t feel fake, the way it does with some of the other men. It feels as though he really cares about you, your interests, and what makes you happy. 

And because of this, it’s not difficult to reciprocate in kind. As he mentioned during your promenade, Lord Kang clearly loves literature. When you ask about his library, his enthusiasm about the subject is infectious. At some point you land on the topic of an author that you both have read, one that he enjoyed and you didn’t, and it sparks a lively back-and-forth that has both of you laughing in the end. You’re nowhere near as well-read as he is, and in this conversation it unfortunately shows—his opinions on the author are deep and nuanced while you struggle to articulate what it is about the writing that made you dislike it so—but he remains patient and respectful, and despite your lack of knowledge, just like when you spoke during your promenade, you never feel out of place or embarrassed. 

“You are so well-read, my lord,” you say at the end of your little debate. Your throat rasps a little from speaking so much but you hardly notice, you’re smiling so hard. “How did you come into possession of so many books, and how do you have the time to read them all?”

“Well, both my mother and father enjoy collecting books, so I grew up surrounded by them,” he replies. Of course, you think—such a love for literature must have been cultivated from a young age, just as your love for music. “I took it upon myself to read as many as I could when I was a child, and so when I went to school I quite enjoyed my classics lessons. Upon inheriting the earldom, I was pleased to learn that the estate came with a very large library that the previous lord had left.” At that, Lord Kang’s smile softens. “I’ve been spending all the free time that I can reading as much as possible. The late lord must have been collecting books for a very long time, though—sometimes I wonder if I will be able to finish them all before I pass on.”

You nod in sympathy. “I feel the same about all the sheet music I have collected over the years. I always want to add more to my repertoire, but there’s just so much in the world. I could certainly never hope to finish it all, though perhaps that is the beauty in it. The beauty in creation, I mean.” You glance at the music you gifted him, lying on the table beside you two. “I believe art is a tribute to humanity, to human emotion and empathy. People will be composing and writing throughout my life and long after my death, and to know that this beauty continues on even though I will not be there to share it…I think that is beautiful. It is a wonderful tradition, passed on through the ages, and I will always be honored to have been a part of it.”

A short silence falls after your declaration. Suddenly self-conscious, you look up to find Lord Kang’s eyes riveted to yours. “That is a lovely way of seeing things,” he says softly. “I had never thought about art before in such a manner.”

You duck your head, heat crawling up your cheeks. “Many perspectives exist when it comes to the philosophy of the arts, my lord. This is only mine.”

He cocks his head, meeting your eyes again. “And a lovely philosophy it is, my lady.”

Thankfully—or unthankfully, really—you’re saved from having to come up with a response by the entrance of your footman. “Another caller has arrived,” he says, glancing at you, then Lord Kang, then at your aunt. “Shall I send him in?”

You glance up at the clock. Already half an hour has passed, though to your mind it feels like only seconds have slipped away—certainly not thirty minutes, already ten minutes over what a normal call would be. Inwardly you curse the next caller for having come too soon—actually, for having come at all—because while you may not know him well, you’re quite certain Lord Kang’s impeccable manners will have him clearing out before the next caller comes in. 

To your chagrin, you’re right. Lord Kang quickly stands and you follow suit, still cursing the clock and the caller. “I will not intrude upon your next call, my lady,” he says, and maybe it is delusion but you fancy he sounds somewhat put out when he says this. “I have already taken too much of your time.”

“Not too much at all, my lord.” You curtsy to his short bow. “I did not realize so much time had passed, but I quite enjoyed our conversation. And thank you kindly for lending me your books. I will be sure to enjoy them.”

“Of course.” He inclines his head with an enchanting smile. “And I must thank you again for your kind gift, my lady. Perhaps by the next time we meet, I will have learned to play it.”

You grin. “I do hope so. It would be so lovely to hear you perform sometime.”

With that, Lord Kang makes his goodbyes, and you’re left to welcome the next caller. He is thankfully not Mr. Haynesworth, as you had privately been dreading, but really, you feel that any caller would have paled in comparison to Lord Kang. Lord Kim, whom you met at the last ball you attended, isn’t rude or vile or even awkward. He’s a gentleman, all things considered. But after the requisite greetings, he begins the call with an outright statement about his plans for the future, which leaves you half-floundering for a response after your previous lively conversation with Lord Kang. 

Lord Kim doesn’t share any of your interests. He barely feigns interest in your music, and though he doesn’t say it outright, you’re almost certain he would want you to give up the piano if you were to marry. Though that’s not even what bothers you the most, you realize only when he’s about to leave—it’s the fact that he didn’t even ask you about it. It’s the expectation that he seems to have that you would do what he says without question, without the respect of even considering your passions and interests when planning out the rest of your possible life together. 

Later that night you lie awake in your bed, staring at the dark ceiling as you run through the events of the day. In an ideal world, you ask yourself, if you were to be married, what would make it a perfect marriage?

No conflict. Perfect understanding of one another, and perfect respect. But really, those are impossible demands. You’re not sure any marriage would be perfect without conflict, anyway—such a relationship sounds awfully like a domineering husband and submissive wife, which you hope to fully steer clear of. 

But understanding and respect, even if not perfect, doesn’t seem like it should be so unattainable. Marriage, you think, should be a partnership. And a partnership implies a mutual respect for one another, no? And maybe the definition of respect varies from one person to another, but for you, it involves a consideration of your interests and how deeply they play a role in your life. Because for you, before now, almost your entire life was music. You can’t—won’t—give it up just to play a role in society. So is there anyone who might give you that respect?

The answer is obvious already. 

You sigh, rubbing a thumb over where Lord Kang kissed your hand earlier in greeting. He certainly seems to be the ideal, at least for you. Your mind returns to your avid conversation, and his complete attentiveness to you. 

Few people have listened to you like he did today. Your mother did before she died, and sometimes your governess does, but not many others. You need that, you realize. You need someone, or something, to hear you—it’s partly why you poured so much of yourself into the piano when your mother passed, because it felt like only the instrument could hear you and understand your pain, your grief. That is what you need in marriage. In partnership. 

And, you think, remembering large eyes and a soft, wide smile, there’s only one person you know who seems to fit this ideal. 

. . . . .

“You look like you’re having quite a lot of fun.”

Taehyun turns from where he’s been staring at the drink table for probably a little too long. “Yeonjun? I didn’t know you’d be here tonight.”

The duke picks up two glasses and hands one to him. “We weren’t certain if we were going to come either. The duchess decided last night that she wanted to get out of the house for some time, so here we are. ”

Taehyun nods. “Come to think of it, I haven’t seen the two of you out much since you returned to town.”

“It’s only been a couple of weeks since we returned,” Yeonjun defends. “There was and still is much to sort out, and unfortunately I have to return to the country next weekend to supervise the removal and fixing of some of the farmers’ equipment.” He sighs. “I hate responsibility.”

“It will all be fine, I’m sure,” Taehyun comforts. Yeonjun and his wife are two of the most capable people he knows; he’s certain they will be alright no matter what challenges they face. “Join us at the club tomorrow afternoon,” he offers. “Kai, Beomgyu, and Soobin will be there too.”

Yeonjun brightens immediately. “I will be there.” Then he squints his eyes into a mock frown. “Are you all now meeting without me? Is it because I’m old, and married, and jaded now?”

“Well, when you put it that way…” Taehyun snickers into his drink as Yeonjun’s pout deepens exaggeratedly. “No, we just met up a few times when you were still in the country. You’ll be included in every invite now, I promise.” He pauses. “Though of course if you are busy, you are under no obligation to come.”

“Thank you very much.” Yeonjun grins, that eye smile that drove so many debutantes insane appearing on his face. “But enough about me. Now about you.” He fixes Taehyun with a stern eye. “I thought you were looking for a wife? You won’t have much luck with that, staring at this array of drinks.”

Taehyun makes a face. “I think many of these mamas want to find their daughters husbands more than I want to find myself a wife,” he mutters. 

Yeonjun nearly chokes into his drink. “That’s certainly one way to put the issue,” he coughs out, recovering. “Though I heard from Beomgyu that there is already a lady you have decided to court?”

“…Yes.” Taehyun narrows his eyes. “How did you know that? I only told Kai.”

“He says he heard it from Kai, so I think we know what happened there.” Yeonjun shrugs as Taehyun sighs. “Apparently you didn’t say it was a secret.”

He didn’t. But all the same… “He’ll be the death of me, someday,” Taehyun mutters. “But yes, I have someone in mind. Miss L/N. You met her a couple of weeks ago, at the gathering.” He pauses, then decides he may as well just be out with it. “I’ve been calling on her since.”

“That is wonderful to hear,” Yeonjun replies sincerely. “Is she here tonight?”

“She said she would be.” Taehyun glances around the room. “I specifically asked, because we keep seeming to miss each other at all the other balls. If I’m there, she isn’t, and if I’m not, she is.” They share a little laugh. “I haven’t been able to find her here since I arrived, though.” He gestures helplessly at the drink table. “Hence…”

Yeonjun makes a little ‘o’ of understanding. “I see. And you do not want to dance with any of the other debutantes?”

“I already have,” Taehyun says, glancing at the bustling dance floor. “I’m just…tired, I suppose.” He tries to smile. “You know how it is.”

He doesn’t, not really. In the year since Taehyun gotten to know the duke, he’s come to the conclusion that Yeonjun is like Taemin when it comes to things like this—ever social, ever happy to entertain and be entertained. But also like Taemin, he understands that Taehyun is different, and tires of these things much more easily than he does. “I understand,” Yeonjun replies sympathetically. A little glint enters his eye when he sees something just behind Taehyun. “If you’d like, I can cover you for a bit. So you can find some quiet.”

Taehyun casts a glance back. Sure enough, a small group of mamas and their daughters seem to be eyeing him and the duke. “That would be most appreciated,” he says gratefully. 

Within moments, Yeonjun has skillfully engaged the group of ladies in conversation and has also managed to snag a hapless Wooyoung into joining him, leaving Taehyun to slip past the throng. As the rooms grow less crowded and the corridors quieter, he takes a deep breath, reveling in the silence. 

Only it isn’t completely silent, even in this empty room. If Taehyun listens carefully, he can catch a hint of a melody that isn’t just the remnants of the orchestra fading in from a nearby corridor. 

Within moments, he’s heading down the corridor, a smile curving his lips as he searches for the source of the music. 

He finds the room with a little difficulty, following the sound of your performance down corridor after corridor. When he finally stumbles upon the slightly cracked open door, Taehyun is reminded of the second ball of the season, where he heard you that first time. He didn’t know it was you then, but he certainly knows it is you now. It helps that this is a piece he’s heard you play before—it’s a lovely Mozart sonata you performed when he called on you a few days ago—but your style is also so distinctive that even though Taehyun has only heard you play a handful of times, even not knowing the piece, he’s almost certain he would still know it was you. 

Taehyun smiles just beyond the room, leaning closer towards the open door. He won’t disturb you—even though he aims to court you, he would never trap you into a proposal by having someone catch the two of you alone together. He just wants to listen. And perhaps, when you’re finished, he’ll be able to catch you when you return back to the party, and you two can share a dance. 

It’s strange that in all the times you’ve met, the two of you have not yet danced together once. Taehyun aims to rectify that as soon as he can, if you will allow it. 

And allow it you will, he thinks. He’s certain he’s not the only one who has noticed how well you two get along. You must have felt it too, just as you must also have seen by now that he is quite interested in you.  And he’s almost sure that you are interested in him too, if your shy smiles and sweet words are anything to go by. 

Closing his eyes, he leans closer to the music. A brilliant sparkle of notes swirl under your fingers, the melody leaping with a joy that lingers in his ears and widens his smile. Cheerful and sweet, though there’s a noise that doesn’t sound right entering the piece. It’s strange—it sounds something like—

Footsteps?

Taehyun quickly ducks into a nearby empty room, praying no one saw him. The low conversation of the small group continues without interruption and he breathes a sigh of relief. They keep coming closer, though, and he thinks he can hear the voice of Lady Arina Park telling Her Majesty—she brought the queen?—that she must see the Gérard painting in this room, it’s quite famous and apparently not a fake—

Holding his breath, Taehyun watches them enter the room where you’re playing. But the music doesn’t stop, not just yet. He almost smiles—it’s not hard to believe you would be so lost in the melody that you wouldn’t notice a small group of people entering the room—but that smile freezes in place when the queen makes an exclamation and the music ends abruptly. 

Taehyun swallows. This might not be good. The queen can’t be pleased that you would avoid a ball to play the pianoforte—maybe he can help, just enter the room and act surprised to see everyone. He could easily claim he was curious about the music. 

He edges into the hallway just in time to hear you apologizing profusely. “Forgive me, Your Majesty, I was only taking a small pause from the ball—”

“Because you delight in your endeavors.” Taehyun stops short when he hears the smile in Her Majesty’s voice. He should leave—from her tone, you are probably not in trouble, which means it’s better for him not to be here. He wouldn’t want to be accused of eavesdropping on Her Majesty. Still, though he can’t help but hear the queen’s words as he takes soundless steps down the hallway. “Someone who performs not for me, but for themselves. Brava.”

That, Taehyun can agree with. Yet while part of his heart leaps in happiness for you—it is, after all, no small feat to impress the queen—another part of him remembers your desire for quiet at the Tillings’ ball and wonders what the queen’s attention might mean for an introverted woman like you. 

You mumble something that he doesn’t quite catch. And as Taehyun steps down the corridor, he hears the queen speak again, pleasure clear in her tone. 

“A performance that sparkles,” she declares. “Just like a diamond.”

Reblogs and comments are deeply appreciated! Hope you enjoyed this, and have a lovely day :) Note: part 2 will be posted in three days, on June 17 at 8pm EST :)