#kalevauva

[teal-skull]

Beibe herää! Kalevauvalta tuli uusi biisi:

[iibislintu]

vantaalainen hinku nousta seisomaan kun radiosta tulee kansallislaulu (kalevauvan vantaa)

🎵 Vanda, Vanda, där blir du en panda 🎵

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

Taking a quick break from Ultra Bra to bring you one of my favourite Kalevauva.fi songs, Sinappitutut (“Mustard acquaintances”). Lyrics are directly taken from a forum post about one poster's strange fixation with mustard. A forum post which I've read myself! This isn't even the weirdest the conversation gets, believe me.

INTRO

Kuinka nopsaan olitte niin sanotusti sinappituttuja?

How long did it take for you to become so-called mustard acquaintances? 

Kauanko ensikohtaamisesta meni?

How long did it take from your first meeting?

Vai olitteko jo ennen seurustelua niin hyvät kaverit?

Or were you already such good friends before dating?

VERSE 1

Öö

Uhh

Mitä helevetin sinappituttuja?

What the hell does mustard acquaintances mean?

Nyt jäi tälle termi hieman epäselväksi

This term is quite unfamiliar to me

No siis sinappituttu

I mean, mustard acquaintance

Kehtaa esim. laittaa sinappia makkaran päälle tms. 

You dare to, for example, put mustard on a sausage, or something like that

Meinaakos että

Do you mean

Lainausmerkeissä "sinappia"

Quote unquote “mustard”

Lainausmerkeissä "makkaralle"?

On a quote unquote “sausage”? 

Siis ihan on kyse maustesinapista

This is specifically about the condiment

En minä ainakaan ensitapaamisella rupea mitään sinappia ruiluttamaan

I wouldn’t personally start squirting mustard around on my first date 

Eli siis kehtaa syödä normaalisti

So you mean, "to eat normally"

Vai mitä tällä haetaan?

Or what are you trying to get at?

CHORUS

Sinappi ei kuulu suhteen alkuhuumaan

Mustard does not belong in a relationship’s honeymoon phase

Pitääkö vääntää rautalangasta?

Do I have to spell it out?

Tiedän, etten ole ainut joka asian näin kokee

I know that I’m not the only person who feels this way

Kenen mielestä sinappi on romanttinen sana?

Who thinks that mustard is a romantic word?

Kenen mielestä sinappi on romanttinen sana?

Who thinks that mustard is a romantic word?

VERSE 2

10 vuotta on yhdessä pyöritty, mutta että sinappituttuja?

We’ve been together for 10 years, but mustard acquaintances?

Ei nyt sentään! Joku roti!

Never in a million years! Have some common sense!

Mikä siitä sinapista tekee niin erityisen kammottavan?

What makes mustard so especially horrifying?

Voitko pliis selittää vielä tarkemmin?

Could you please explain this more in depth?

Mielestäni olen kyllä jo selittänyt ihan suomeksi

I feel like I’ve already laid out in plain English

Että sinapin koostumus ja nimi eivät ole kovin romanttisia

That the texture and the name of mustard aren’t particularly romantic

Nimi on paha? Millä tavalla? Mikä siitä tekee pahan?

The name is the issue? In what way? What makes the name so bad?

Entäs maito? Entäs kurkku? Entäs punajuurisalaatti?

What about milk? What about cucumber? What about beetroot salad?

Ei sinappia voi verrata esimerkiksi majoneesiin

You can’t compare mustard to mayonnaise, for example

Mitä tarkennusta tähän vielä vaaditaan?

What clarification do we still need here? 

CHORUS

Just joku sinappi ei kuulu suhteen alkuhuumaan

Some damn mustard does not belong in a relationship’s honeymoon phase

Pitääkö vääntää rautalangasta?

Do I have to spell it out?

Tiedän, etten ole ainut joka asian näin kokee

I know that I’m not the only person who feels this way

Kenen mielestä sinappi on romanttinen sana? (Mitä tällä haetaan?)

Who thinks that mustard is a romantic word? (What are you getting at?)

Kenen mielestä sinappi on romanttinen sana?

Who thinks that mustard is a romantic word?

OUTRO

Kuinka nopsaan olitte niin sanotusti sinappituttuja?

How long did it take for you to become so-called mustard acquaintances? 

Kauanko ensikohtaamisesta meni?

How long did it take from your first meeting?

Vai olitteko jo ennen seurustelua niin hyvät kaverit?

Or were you already such good friends before dating?

[kinuskikakku]

Joku nyt laittamaan ehdotus Kalevauva.fille.

omg someone make a song using duolingo phrases.

Im gonna be jamming out to it and I hear the immaculate bar "Se on söpö pupu" and "Tuo varanta on lämmin"

*chef's kiss*

[toverivoetkylae]

En tiiä, mitä tekisin ilman posankkaa. Se on semmoinen hengellinen tuki ja turva.

[wirvalisp]

Ehheheh. I got this ridiculous idea for a fan art after a long day at work and I just giggled to myself behind my mask while still on my way home.

Let me explain to all of you who are not Finnish: the text is Finnish for "The man eats the child's puddings". There's this Finnish music duo called Kalevauva.fi whose shtick is they draw all their songs' lyrics from threads on an internet forum called vauva.fi - a very popular Finnish website where pretty much every topic under the sun can be discussed and internet trolls thrive. One of their most brilliant songs is, yup, you guessed it, "Mies syö lapsen vanukkaat" where a mother complains about her husband eating all the puddings that were bought for their kids.

I mean, Cortex isn't exactly a father of the year in any sense, I don't think stealing Crash's desserts wouldn't be beneath him. 😆

[yokyopeli]

Kirjamessujen satoa/ I went to a book fair (20.11.2021)

Kansanetiikkaa Käsityksiä hyvästä ja pahasta/ Folk ethics: notions on good and evil

Kalevauvala/ folk songs based on vauva.fi message boards

Idän orjakauppa keskiajalla/ Medival slave trade in the East: Robbing of humans from Finland and Karelia

Toward a Red Melting Pot: The Racial Thinking of Finnish American Radicals 1900-1938

Suoja 1: Kaupunki ja paluu (Laura Luotola)/ queer indigenous scifi

Ilmatilaa Kasmeera Lokuge & Hyppe Salmi/ lit. Air space fig. Breathing Room, Finnish Sri Lankan 20 something in Finland in the 2020s.

[kuu-ukkeli]

vegaanipullapäivä!

[pantomeemitaiteilija]

[Kalevauva.fi:n Panohanskat melodiaan]

Homosukat,

Raidalliset, värikkäät

Homosukat !!

[aleksiskivi]

Kalevauva.fi - Kouvola

[emojeesus]

T@teppovesi-cappuccino intrusive thoughts much?

<3

[lellunen]

"Lähteekö jouhikolla paranoid?"

Linnanjuhlat suomalaisuuden ytimessä

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

hi hi!! this is the main blog for @itscodyelliot , i reblogged your post about finnish music about a week ago. i just wanted to update you that i've started listening to your recommendations, so far i've listened to kalevauva.fi's 2017 and 2022 albums. i think that taking forum posts is really unique and creative!! i don't know the translations of what they're saying but it sounds really good just from listening. they incorporated those online comments really well (from a non-finnish speaker's perspective). also i love their guitar, it's incredibly nostalgic for me

if you don't want me to update you as i go lmk and i'll leave you alone, but if you don't mind ima check out Käärijä next! i discovered one of my current favorite bands (Måneskin) from tumblr eurovision posts a year or two ago, so i'm curious as to if i've heard his music before and not realized it.

okay bye have a wonderful day!!

How wonderful! I'm glad you've enjoyed their music. I also think their music approach is unique, I haven't really seen the same being done on a scale of a duo making songs only from existing forum posts, before? There's always the occasional "making a song out of hate comments I've gotten!" but that's about it. And as a Finnish-speaker their lyrics come together really nicely! Often the duo will take "roles" in their songs, singing specific lyrics written by specific forum users, creating this sort of dialogue. My favourite instance is Sinappitutut ("Mustard Acquaintances"), where one person tries to defend their strange relationship classification system while "others" (the other guy) berate them.

If you're looking for translations, people in the YouTube comments of their music videos sometimes provide them, but I would actually love to translate some songs, too! And I mean that in earnest. I take great enjoyment in translating songs from Finnish to English, because I want to give people the chance to enjoy a song to its fullest potential. Heck, sometimes I just do them anyway even if they're not for anyone to read, for my favourite songs! Today while on my walk I was actually pondering lyric translations for Kalevauva.fi's song Panohanskat (err... "Fucking gloves")

Do tell what you think of Käärijä! And hit me up for lyrics :]

[kullijuustosiivu]

Uus kalevauva!

[toverivoetkylae]

Kaaoksen voima on ylittämätön

Mikään ei tuu mun ja Pariisin kevään väliin, paitsi @toverivoetkylae ja Kalevauva näköjään.

[kelkkamonologi]

Kello on 0:08 ja mä kuuntelen Kalevauvaa. Mitä on elämä?