#k now i'm gonna go eat something lol

[starsinthesky5]

nothing's gonna hurt you baby || joe burrow x reader

description: the first game of the season doesn't go as planned and it kills you to see joe like this. you can't help but feel deja vu...

a/n: ahem, is this thing on 🎤🎤.  i'm backkkkk… after a much-needed tiny break (not planned just life getting in the way). this is a little something i cooked up! still working on "taste" which is a slow work in progress but that's the main next fic that'll be coming soon!

as always, thanks for reading & showing love :)))) i hope this wasn’t too much yapping and nonsense lol. the smut isnt my best because i wrote it while i was half asleep but i hope you enjoy it. there’s also plenty of song references throughout the fic (biggest one and the inspiration being this CAS song)

warnings: angst, fluff, smut. that's literally the whole fic :)

word count: 12.2 k

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You leaned back against the wall across from the entrance to the locker rooms, anxiously picking at a thumbnail on your finger as you waited for your boyfriend to come out so you two could go home. You were standing in your orange halter crop top with a little '9' embroidered on the bottom left side and matching white jean shorts with the same '9' embroidered in orange on the back right pocket. The '9' on your shorts was a little bigger than the one on your top which Joe loved because according to him ‘everyone knows who your ass belongs to’. His adorable possessive nature was always something you admired and appreciated. He was very secure in your relationship and knew nobody would take you from him, but that didn't stop him from ensuring everyone knew you were his at any chance he got. 

You were also wearing orange stiletto knee-high boots which adds to the overall orange vibe of your game-day outfit. The theme was 'open in orange' so you were wearing as much orange as you could possibly make look cute. Your '9' necklace was the only piece of jewelry you had around your neck, and your wrists were decked out with bracelets given to you by Joe–each one even more polished and expensive than the previous one, and various rings on your fingers. Your favorite one, the beautiful promise ring Joe gave you for your 2nd anniversary, shined brighter than any of the jewelry you had on. It was a ‘secret garden’ inspired ring, one of your favorite books of all time. 

There was a growing pit in your stomach as you stood there gazing at the large ‘B’ on the wall outside the locker room, a slow-burning sensation that started about two minutes into the game, and it was only getting bigger as the minutes passed by. By the end of the game, you were the most on edge you had ever been in your entire life. 

Since this was Joe's first real game back after his wrist injury, your anxiety was already pretty bad by the time you got to the stadium. Your brain was swarmed with 'what-if?' scenarios and it was eating you alive. Joe, however, seemed the exact opposite of you. He was completely calm, normal, and focused like this was any other game. His peaceful temperament wasn't surprising since he had always been like this before every game but it also should've been expected since he worked through most of his emotions with you the night before and didn’t have anything left to get out. You on the other hand did a complete 360; you were so calm with him last night but right now you were on the verge of ripping your eyelashes out. 

Flashback to the night before

You reached over to grab your glass of water, taking a big sip to help wash down the spicy chicken you were eating for dinner. You looked up at Joe as you were swallowing your water, noting how he was playing around with his food on his unusually full plate. You had been eating for almost 15 minutes and by now, his plate should be empty given how much of an animal he was once dinner rolled around. 

“Not hungry?” you broke the unusual silence and asked. 

Joe's eyes glanced up to meet yours, his cheeks burning because you took note of his behavior, which you weren't supposed to. “Uhh, not really,”  he sighed as he placed his fork down and leaned back in his chair, his sweaty hands sliding up and down his thighs out of nervousness. 

“You do know you have a game tomorrow, right?” you chuckled as you placed your fork down and leaned back in your chair like he was. “You need all the protein you can get,”.

“...Y- yeah, I know,” Joe mumbled after a few seconds of uneasy silence. 

You instantly noticed the change in his body language at the mention of the game; the way his eyes fell down to his lap after his mumbling response, the way he started bouncing his left leg, his shoulders tensing up a little bit, the way he was constantly doing something with his hands as if he was uncomfortable, the way he was chewing at his bottom lip. These were all things Joe did when he was feeling anxious. 

But why was he anxious?

“Hey, you okay?” you asked while leaning forward again, his body language making you worry.

“Yeah, I'm fine,” he swallowed, still not meeting your eyes. He knew all it took was for you to get one look at his eyes to figure out he was lying and he really didn't want to burden you with his complicated emotions tonight. 

“He’s lying,” you thought to yourself. The fact that he was avoiding eye contact with you was a dead giveaway. “Joe?” you said while lowering your head to get into his view. 

“Yeah?” he said, his voice slightly trembling as he finally looked into your eyes. 

“Why are you lying to me?” you said as your face dropped at the sight of his tired eyes and shaky voice. 

“I’m not ly-,” he began to say before you interrupted him.

“Yeah, you are,” you interrupted. “I know you, remember. I know you better than you know yourself,” you softly laughed. 

You weren’t wrong there, you did know Joe better than he knew himself and he was the first one to admit it. You knew exactly what he was thinking, exactly how to put his feelings into words even when he couldn’t do so himself, and exactly how to handle him. There was a reason why you were the only person he let into the bubble that he had around himself once football started back up. You were his shelter in the hurricane that became his life once he was back on the field and without you, Joe would be a mess. 

Your response earned no reaction from Joe, he just sat there in silence and continued to bounce his leg up and down as he started to play with the wristbands on his wrist, yet another anxiety-related mannerism. 

You let out a tired breath, “I’m not doing this, I can’t have him shut me out again,” you thought to yourself before scooting your chair back, walking around the dining table, and sitting down on the seat next to him. You turned your chair to face him and grabbed his hands, feeling the thin layer of sweat that coated his palms which made your heart hurt. 

“Joe, it’s just us right now. Nothing’s gonna hurt you baby, talk to me,” you said while giving his hands a soft squeeze. You were feeling deja vu right now, you found yourself in the same situation you found yourself in many times over the early months of the off-season, only then it was 10 times worse than it was right now. 

Joe looked into your eyes, his body feeling heavy as self-doubt, anxiety, and fear crept into his mind. He was nervous about tomorrow’s game. Joe had never been nervous about a game like this and you were sitting in front of him, trying to get him to talk which you shouldn’t need to ‘try’ to do, he should be openly talking to you right now about his feelings. He always let you into the bubble, so why was it so hard for him to do it right now?

He realized that he was shutting down again, just like he had when he first got injured back in November. He didn’t want to go back to that dark place again, especially since coming out of it was a struggle that affected you both very badly. “I’m scared,” he choked out a few seconds later, trying his best to push through the wall he was unknowingly building again.

“Why?” you quietly asked as you felt your heart shatter because of the tone of his voice. You hated seeing him like this, it broke your heart to see him like this. You moved your hand up to cup his neck, the pads of your fingers were softly rubbing his tan skin which was a gentle action that you knew would calm him down. 

“It’s my first game back from injury. An injury that could’ve easily ended my career. It should’ve ended my career,” he said while lifting his hand to wipe a stray tear from his eye.

“But it didn’t,” you smiled. “It didn’t end your career then and it won’t end your career now,”.

“How do you know that? I haven’t played in a real game since November. I haven’t gotten hit yet, I haven’t gotten sacked yet, and I haven’t been putting that much pressure on my hand. Tomorrow could easily be the last game of my career. Just one wrong move and-,”.

“No.” you interrupted. “You’re not doing that. Not on my watch,” you sternly said, trying to prevent him from getting too far inside his head about everything. Overthinking was his worst enemy.

“I’m being realistic, Y/N. Who knows if I’ll be the same Joe I was before,” he said while blinking away a few tears. 

“You don’t need to be the same Joe you were before,” you soothed while continuing to rub his neck. “What you went through was unlike anything anyone has seen before, if people are expecting you to get right back to where you left off then they have no heart or brains. You’ll get to where you need to be, I promise. Things like this take time,” you added. “The Joe you are now is more than enough. You have grown in many ways that you might not have been able to unless you went through what you went through after November. You’ve worked on yourself and become more open, honest, and loose. You’ve put in the work on the field, in the weight room, in training, and even at home. You’re coming out of this a better person and a better player. A better Joe,”. 

“I just don’t want to let anyone down. What if we lose tomorrow? With the slow start narrative getting louder and the aftermath of my wrist injury, this could be really fucked. This year is so important and I just don’t want to let anyone down; the organization, the team, the public, you,” he continued, his grip on your other hand becoming tighter. “I know I have a chip on my shoulder and have a lot to prove this year, but the thought of people not seeing that is killing me,”.

“You won’t let anyone down, Joe. And you could never ever fucking let me down, never say that again,” you said as you continued to rub his neck, seeing that he was getting more loose from your touch. “You’ve worked so so hard the past 10 months to get back to where you want to be and everyone and I mean everyone has seen that. I’ve seen that. Adversity always makes you better, it ignites that fire inside of you. That fire makes you who you are,” you said to him, feeling a little more comfortable yourself after seeing his body relax a bit. “Remember who you are. You’re Joe Burrow. Heisman winner, College Football National Champion, the first overall draft pick, one of the Top 5 quarterbacks in the league, one of the highest-paid quarterbacks, Ohio’s golden boy. You’re all of those things for a reason, Joe. You have it in you. You don’t need to be afraid or doubt yourself because you did all of those things, nobody else, just you,”. 

You moved your hand over and wiped the tears that slowly were sliding down his cheeks before feeling Joe grab your hand and press a wet kiss to your palm. “I love you,” he sniffled. “I genuinely don’t know what I would do without you,”.

“I love you too,” you smiled before you leaned up to kiss his forehead. “Tomorrow is unpredictable, I will admit. But you control the narrative. You control what happens and what doesn’t happen out there. It’s just you and the football like it always has been. I know you and I know you’re going to kill it,”. 

Joe gave you a small nod as he let your words sit inside of his head; you were right and he knew you were right. He did all of this himself, he single-handedly built his reputation and although there was an immense amount of pressure on him to maintain it, he knew that it was his reputation. He had control over his story, not anyone else. He didn’t need to work at anyone else’s speed except for his own. He knows the narrative that the media has been running with since November, that his career has been hindered by continuous injuries and he’s ’injury prone’. He knows what that title has done to the public's opinion on his career and rank as a player, but they don’t get to define him based on what they think. He is defined by everything he does himself. 

It’s not their story, it’s his. 

He reached out and placed his hand on your waist, gently pulling you from your chair and into his lap. You instantly looped your arms around his neck and pushed his head to the crook of your neck, this warm hug from you was the final thing he needed to fully calm his nerves. “You always know what to say to me,” he mumbled against your collarbone as you ran your fingers through his slightly grown-out frosted tips, his hands softly massaging your plush skin. 

“It’s my job,” you chuckled. “I signed up for this when I met you at that football practice all those years ago and I plan on staying true to what I signed up for as long as I can,” you added before you dropped a kiss on his cheek, your mind calming down once you felt him relax against you.

“You better plan on it. I’m not letting you go anywhere,” he said as he pulled you in tighter. 

“Well it’s a good thing I don’t want to go anywhere,” you giggled in his ear before pressing a kiss to it, then turning back to serious to finish off your little pep-talk. “I’m so proud of you, Joe. More than you’ll ever know. You’re truly the hardest working man I’ve ever met and you continue to amaze me with your dedication and determination every single day. Never think that you’re not good enough and you’re not who everyone thinks you are. You’re Joe Fucking Burrow. Never forget that,”. 

“I won’t,” he sighed contently, finally at peace. “I won’t forget,” he said again before he pulled you closer and closed his eyes, getting lost in your palliative embrace. 

End of flashback 

You were so calm last night and now you were the complete opposite; you couldn’t figure out where and when things went south with your emotions. During the game, your brain was running a mile a minute as you thought of everything that could go wrong: Joe re-aggravating his injury, someone else on the team getting badly injured, and the team not being able to beat the slow start narrative. You were anxious, nervous, and deeply scared once the first quarter of the game started, and your feelings were validated when two minutes into the game Joe got sacked and fumbled the ball. 

You remember your heart stopping once you saw him go down as this was the first time he had been hit since November. 

“No!” you screamed as you shot up from your seat, your hand gripping the necklace around your neck as you looked down on the field and saw a bunch of large behemoths on top of him. “No, No, No,” you panicked as your breaths got shorter, your anxiety getting worse and worse as you saw flashbacks from the Ravens game in November. “Please be okay,” you thought to yourself as you were on the verge of tears. 

Then you remember your heart dropping to your feet once you saw the ball come loose and even though he recovered it, this whole play left a bitter taste in your mouth since it was literally the first few minutes of the game and things were already not going as planned. Luckily, his going down didn’t seem to affect his wrist, but you could only imagine how it affected him mentally. 

You thought that would’ve been the only sack of the game, but once again you were wrong. Each time Joe went down, you felt your heart stop. Each time he ran, your heart stopped again as you got flashbacks from early last year with his calf injury. Each time the camera panned to the sidelines and focused in on him, you felt like crying because you could tell the way the game was going was eating away at him by his facial expressions. 

Every sack, every fumble, every drive that ended without scoring, and every turnover was killing you because the things Joe feared were happening even though you told him they wouldn’t. Seeing him flex his wrist on the sidelines and in between plays was the one thing that really did it for you. You didn’t know if this was just to keep his hand loose because he was feeling some tightness or whether this was because something was actually bothering him, your brain was in panic mode for the rest of the game. 

“I hope he’s okay, that was ugly,” you thought to yourself before you jumped at the sound of the locker room door swinging open and snapping you out of your daze. 

You watched as Joe walked out of the locker room, his eyes exhausted and defeated as he gave you a small ‘reassuring’ smile, however, it wasn’t very reassuring because his eyes gave his true feelings away in an instant. 

You returned his smile with a smile of your own, opening your mouth to ask him if he was okay but before you could he leaned forward and dropped a kiss on your lips. He held it for a few moments as he melted into your touch which was the only relieving feeling he had felt all day before pulling away, entwining your pinkies, and leading you out to the car. 

“That’s not good, he’s never this quiet when I come to meet him after the game,” you thought to yourself. If you didn’t say something first, he almost always did, but he wasn’t saying anything which was concerning. You stayed quiet as he led you out to the garage, your eyes not leaving his weary face for one second. You could tell he wasn’t okay, you could tell he was beating himself up over today’s loss.  

A few moments later, he led you over to the passenger’s side of the car, an unusual move since you always drove the both of you home after a game. “I thought I was driving,” you gently said as you looked up at him. 

“I got it,” he said with no emotion in his voice, dropping your pinky and looking into your eyes with his now cold and emotionless ones. 

“But Joe I-,” you began to say but before you could finish your sentence he turned around and walked to the other side of the car. 

“He definitely heard me,” you thought to yourself as you watched him open the backseat door and roughly throw his bag in, then slammed the door shut with a little more force than usual which startled you. 

You let out a deep breath before opening your door and sliding into the passenger seat, your body stiff and frozen because of the way he was acting. You were scared to say something, scared to do something because you didn’t know what reaction you’d get from him, “He’s not doing this again, right?” you worried. 

10 minutes into the drive home, you started getting agitated. He had yet to say anything to you, not even asking you if you were cold and if he should turn down the AC which he always asked you whenever you were in the car since he knew you got cold easily. His hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles were practically turning white and his eyes were so locked in on the road in front of you that he hadn’t even noticed that you started shivering a little bit. 

“Are you okay?” you finally broke the tension and asked, your bottom lip in between your teeth out of nervousness. Joe rarely ever raised his voice at you or got irritated by you saying something to him, but that didn’t stop you from getting nervous around him whenever he was acting like this. 

You saw his jaw clench for a brief moment, your heart skipping a beat as you braced yourself for a potentially explosive reaction, but then you saw him unclench it. “I’m fine,” he said, once again with no emotion in his voice. 

You gave him a small nod and then a few seconds later asked another question since he wasn’t budging, “How’s your wrist?”.

He let out a sigh, one that you could hear from his nose so it was definitely coming from a tired place, “It’s fine,” he said again, not giving you much to work with. 

“He’s not fine, lying yet again. Maybe I could make him laugh? I need to do something to get him to loosen up” you thought to yourself, your brain scrambling to think of something to make him laugh even if it was for a brief moment. 

“At least you guys scored a touchdown this time,” you smiled a few seconds later. “Even though you didn’t win the game, I’d say it was better than week 1 last year against the browns,”. 

You studied his face carefully after you finished your sentence, searching for any tiny muscle movement that resulted in his lips curling up into a smile, but nothing. “Yeah,” he nodded, once again with no emotion. He then reached over to the center console, turning the knob for the volume up so that the once softly playing music was blasting throughout the car. 

You felt your lip quiver and your eyes started to pool with tears as you continued to look at him, praying that he would look at you for even one brief moment, but he didn’t. “He’s doing it again,” you thought to yourself as you fell back into your seat. “He’s fucking doing it again. Just like he did after he got injured. He’s shutting me out,” you thought as you felt a tear slide down your cheek, your head turning away so that you were looking out the window so if Joe did happen to look over at you, he wouldn’t notice your silent tears. 

Joe did look over at you. He was waiting for you to stop looking at him because he couldn’t look into your eyes right now, not when his brain was all over the place and he could regret the things that potentially came out of his mouth. He looked over at you when he saw you turn your head to the window from the corner of his eyes, his eyes softening when he saw your body shaking. You were cold. He always asks you if you’re cold, and this time he didn’t. 

“I fuck everything up,” he muttered under his breath as he reached over to turn the AC down. 

30 minutes later

After a car ride filled with deafening silence, you made it back home a half hour later and were pouring two glasses of water for you and Joe. He was sitting at the kitchen island behind you scrolling on his phone, still quiet as ever. You grabbed his glass and placed it in front of him, getting a peek at what he was looking at on his phone. 

Media reactions. 

Joe never looked at what the internet was saying about a game after it happened, it was one of his ‘blocking outside noise’ methods, so why was he looking at them? 

“You really shouldn’t be looking at all that bullshit,” you said to him as you took a small sip of your water, the cool liquid feeling like a quiet unraveling of tightness within your body.

Joe was so focused on his phone that he didn’t notice that you were talking to him, the only things that he could hear were the voices of reporters talking about the team’s constant slow starts, his poor performance–saying that he played scared, rusty, and didn’t look like himself and that this team is constantly setting itself up for failure. 

A video came up on his phone, an analyst was talking about his performance in today’s game, “We have to talk about Joe Burrow. He said he was ready, he said he felt great, and he said that this team was ready. But did that Cincinnati Bengals team that played against the Patriots today look ready? Absolutely not. Did the Joe Burrow who stepped out onto that field look ready? Absolutely Not. He looked scared, he didn’t look like himself. The lack of Deep Balls, the lack of throwing down the field. That’s not the Joe Burrow we’ve seen in years past. What’s truly going on in Cincinnati? Is there a deeper issue within that we aren’t seeing?”. 

“They see right through me,” Joe thought to himself, feeling his eyes sting from the hot tears that were threatening to come out. He felt like the room was on fire, and there was invisible smoke. Nobody could really see what he was going through, all they saw was the burning room. 

You felt your heart drop as you heard the reporter talk about Joe’s performance in today’s game, knowing that Joe was probably already criticizing himself and this was going to make it worse. “Joe?” you said a little louder, snapping him out of the dark haze he was stuck in.

“Hm?” he hummed as he looked up at you, noticing your pursed lips and worried eyes. 

“Are you okay?” you asked again, feeling uneasy from the look he had on his face.

“...I said I’m fine,” he replied, his voice a little rougher than earlier. 

You shook your head, “I know you’re not fine. Stop lying to me,” you said with a more rigid tone. 

“I’m not lying to you. I said I’m fine. I don’t think it could be more simpler than that,” he rolled his eyes as he picked up his glass of water, taking a big sip. 

“If you are really ‘fine’,” you say, making air quotes around ‘fine’, “Why are you looking at all that bullshit? You never look at any of that because you say it messes with your head,” you say.

“Because I can?” he scoffs, standing up from the barstool and walking around the island to place his water glass in the sink. 

You take a deep breath, trying not to point out his snappy attitude because you know he isn’t in the right headspace right now. “Joe, seriously. I know you’re not fine but it’s just me. You can talk to me,” you gently say as you walk over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder but he quickly turns around and walks back over to where he was sitting to grab his phone which made your hand drop from his shoulder. 

“I know you had a shitty game, I know you’re in your head about it, I get it. Trust me I do, but just let me-,” you begin to say as you walk over to him before he interrupts you. 

“Do you though?” he asks. “Do you really get it? Sweet talking and hugs don’t magically make everything better, Y/N,” he says, his voice a little louder. 

“Ouch.” you thought to yourself. “No. Remember, he’s not in the right headspace, Y/N. He’s not trying to be hurtful,”. 

“I’m not saying that,” you say to him. “I know that doesn’t make everything better but talking to someone about your feelings does. You know that. You spent weeks working on that, remember?” referring to the therapy sessions he had this past off-season to work through the emotional and mental effects of his injury and just overall mental health. 

“I know, but I said I’m fine. I don’t need to talk about anything, especially with you,” he said, his words feeling like a punch to your gut. 

“Okay, what the fuck?” you thought to yourself. “What do you mean ‘especially’ with me?” you asked, your tone switching from gentle to slightly angry. 

Joe stays quiet for a few seconds, his gaze fixed on the concerned look on your face. He knew what he was saying to you was most likely hurting you and you were coming from a place of worry, but he couldn’t control the things that were leaving his mouth right now. “I’m not doing this with you right now,” he shook his head and turned around, walking over to the stairs.

“Doing what?” you said loudly, following him over to the stairs. “I’m just trying to get you to talk to me but you’re making this a bigger deal than it needs to be,”.

“How am I making this a bigger deal?” he grumbles, turning around to look at you. “You’re the one that won’t leave me alone. I’ve said that I’m fine to you like 5 times now,”.

“You’re making this a bigger deal because you’re shutting me out, again,” you say, feeling your cheeks burn with anger, frustration, and sadness. You and Joe hardly fought, and whenever you did, it broke both of you. You felt like absolute shit right now and you couldn’t even imagine how Joe was feeling. 

“No, I’m not. You’re being unbelievable right now,” he rolled his eyes again and started walking up the stairs with you hot on his tail. 

“No, I’m not,” you say, echoing his words. “You are shutting me out just like you did after your wrist injury. What happened to letting me in your bubble? Because right now it feels like I’m being pushed 100 feet from your bubble for no reason,” you said, your voice a little shaky as you tried to hold back your building tears. 

“I’m not shutting you out, Y/N,” he said loudly, his voice even more rougher. “Just because I don’t want to talk to you about how shitty I did today doesn’t mean I’m shutting you out. I just don’t want or feel the need to talk to you about it,”.

“See, you aren’t okay. I knew you weren’t okay. You know you played like shit so you’re clearly not fine,” you huffed as you made it to the top of the stairs.

“Is that all you wanted to hear? That I played like shit? Okay, yeah, I played like absolute shit. You win. Now will you leave me alone?” he said, trying to hold back from shouting at you even though he was dancing on the line that separated shouting from talking loudly. 

“That’s not what I want to hear, Joe. You know that,” you said, your voice cracking once you felt a hot tear slide down your cheek. “I just want you to talk to me about your feelings, especially after our conversation last night. I don’t want you to go through all that again because I know how hard you tried to move past this mentally. You shut me out before and dealt with all of this on your own, and I saw how badly it affected you. I don’t want you to do that again. I can’t see you like that again,” you cried, your body shaking as all of your built-up emotions from the entire day were coming out. 

You wiped your eyes as you followed him down the hallway, both of you walking past your bedroom and heading toward his office. You made it to the door and watched him open it and step inside. You were going to follow him in, but he turned around on the doorstep which blocked you from going inside. “No,” he shook his head.

“But..Joe I-,” you cried harder.

“No. Just please go away,” he said, his jaw clenching again like it was earlier, but this time it stayed clenched. “I can’t deal with you right now,” he said, his words feeling like a stab to your heart now. 

There was nothing behind those eyes now. He had built up that wall again, that wall you tried so hard to prevent from being built because you knew you’d never be able to get over it. The same wall that he had built back in November after his injury. He did it again. After working so hard to be more open and honest about his feelings, thoughts, and emotions, he went straight back to square 1. 

“Joe, please,” you pleaded. “Nothing’s gonna hurt you baby, if you just talk to me,” you cried more forcefully.

Joe stared at you for a few heartbeats, his heart-shattering at the sight of the state he had brought you to. It was all his fault. Everything was his fault; the game and now this argument. Deep down, he knew you were right, but he just couldn’t see it because the wall he had built was too high. 

He was about to open his mouth to say something, trying to listen to you and talk to you about how he was feeling, but he backed down once he saw you start to shake. He saw your distressed face, your red eyes, your trembling lip, your shaking body, and your rapid breathing. He knew this was all his fault. If he unloaded all of his incredibly heavy, intense, and dreadful feelings on you right now, that would be so incredibly selfish of him. 

Joe backed up in the doorway which made you think he was letting you come inside, but just as you were about to come in, he shut the door on your face. 

You stare at the closed door for a few seconds, not processing what just happened. He really wasn’t letting you in. After all that, after everything he went through? After everything you both went through these past 10 months?

“Do you know how scared I was the entire game? Do you know how every time you went down my heart stopped? Do you know that I spent 5 minutes crying in the bathroom during halftime because I saw the look on your face?” you shouted at the door, your sobs getting louder. “I know this is hard for you but I’m here, Joe. I’m always h- here,” you choke out. 

“Just leave me the fuck alone!” Joe shouted through the door, tears sliding down his cheeks as he squeezed his eyes shut because he instantly regretted saying that to you especially with that harshness in his voice that he knew would hurt you. 

You backed up from the door once you heard him shout at you, he never shouted at you, not even when you had arguments worse than this. You looked around the hallway, trying to collect your thoughts but there were none left to collect. You said everything that you could’ve possibly said to get through to him, what more was there left to say?

He wanted you to leave him alone, so you were going to do just that. 

“Okay, I’ll leave you alone,” you whispered to yourself, turning around and walking to your shared bedroom, your sobs echoing throughout the house as you disappeared inside your room. 

On the other side of the office door, Joe was sitting in his office chair, hot tears sliding down his cheeks as he was drowning with regret. He lamented saying those things to you, he doesn’t know what came over him. What was wrong with him? 

“Why did I do that to her? Why the fuck did I do that to…her?” he sniffled. He knows his anxiety and fears are controlling him right now, but there was absolutely no reason for him to take it out on the one person who always is there for him no matter what.  

“I fuck everything up,” he cried as he looked at a photo of the two of you sitting on his desk, a photo his mom took after he got his wrist surgery. 

Flashback to November 27th

“Babe, can we go skydiving?” Joe laughed as he rolled his head against the pillow to look at you. He had just woken up from surgery so he was feeling the effects of the anesthesia, and boy were they funny. The things that were coming out of his mouth were nothing but lighthearted, pure fun. It was good to see him laugh and smile especially since how melancholic his attitude had been since he got injured. 

“Absolutely not,” you said while giving him a serious look. “You are not jumping out of a plane as long as I am on this earth,”. 

“But why not? They have parachutes,” he pouted. “I think it would be sooooo fun,”.

“This is the same man who hates flying. Can you believe it?” Robin laughed as she finished typing up a text to send to family members to let them know the surgery went really well. 

“I know right?” you laughed with her. 

“How long did they say I can’t do stuff with my hand for?” Joe asked you with his adorable wide-eyed stare. 

“I think they said to have it in a sling for at least a month right now until your first follow-up,” you said as you brushed his hair out of his eyes.

“A month?” Joe dramatically gasped, his jaw dropping to the floor.

“Yeah,” you laughed. “Sorry baby, you’re not Deadpool and can’t heal within 5 seconds,” you smiled. 

“Wait, does that mean we can’t have sex for a month?” he gasped again.

“Joe!” you shrieked, your cheeks turning red because his mom was right in front of you both.

“Ah, wait. Loophole, duhh. You can just be on top which I know you love,” he winked while using his finger to point at you for emphasis. 

“Oh my god,” you whined as you hid your face in your sweatshirt sleeves, hearing Joe’s mom break out into a fit of laughter. 

“Hey, don’t hide your pretty face from me,” Joe pouted as he used his good hand to lower your hands that were covering your face. “Ahh, there she is. My beautiful, adorable, sexy-as-hell, fiance,” he said after you uncovered your face.

“Fiance?” you raised an eyebrow and asked. “Is this your way of proposing?” you giggled. 

“No. When I actually do, it’ll be way more grander, sexier, and special than this,” he winked. “Like I’m talking maybe on the top of the Empire State Building, maybe in the middle of the football stadium, maybe at the top of the Eiffel Tower, maybe even while we go skydiving type special proposal. But I know I’m marrying you and I like the word fiance better than girlfriend,” he laughed. 

“You’re insane,” you laughed as you dropped your head to his chest, feeling him cup your head with his good hand and drop a kiss on your head. 

“I love you like a lot,” he giggled. “Like a lot a lot,” he giggled again.

“Ohh, I know,” you cheesed. 

“You definitely don’t. I love you more than words can describe,” he smiled, you craned your head up to look into his sweet eyes before leaning up and pressing a kiss to his lips. “I love you too, Burrow,”. 

After you pulled away you were about to get up from his hospital bed but his mom spoke up, “Wait, stay like that. I’m going to get a picture,” she smiled.  

“Yesss,” Joe nodded. “I loveeeee pictures, especially with my fiance,”. 

“You are really something,” you giggled as you sat up straight.

You moved your hair back and helped Joe scooch up in the bed before turning your head and pressing a kiss to his cheek, placing your hand under his chin as he had a giant grin on his face. His good hand was wrapped around your waist and was holding you as close as possible to his body. 

You two were so happy. For once this past month, you were laughing, you both were smiling. 

“Are you going to be my protector for the next few months?” Joe giggled. “Not let anything bad happen to me and my wrist?”.

“Oh, 100%. I am your nurse, personal bodyguard, and protector. Nobody is hurting my man on my watch,” you grinned again as you smothered his cheeks with kisses. 

You both knew this wasn’t going to be easy, but as long as you were by each other’s side, nothing was going to hurt you. 

End of flashback 

“Nothing’s going to hurt me as long as she’s with me. I can’t keep pushing her away,” Joe whispered to himself as he snapped out of the sweet memory and wiped his tears. 

2 hours later

It had been two hours since your fight with Joe so it had been two hours since you had last seen him. After going into your bedroom earlier, you spent about 10 minutes crying in the bathroom as you tried to change into some comfier clothes. You felt awful about the whole thing. The way you lost your cool a few times, the way he was talking to you, just everything–it was horrible. 

You were currently sitting on the couch, sipping on some water and scrolling through some photos on your phone of the two of you. You let out a small laugh when you came across a silly photo of the two of you at a Hurricane Party you dragged him to at LSU. You remembered he was fully against the idea of going to a party during a hurricane, saying it was ‘batshit crazy’ and a ‘death wish’ but you managed to drag him along with you because you didn’t want him to sit inside and stress about the storm. In the photo, you two were standing on the deck of your friend’s house, the wind blowing so hard against you that Joe’s hat was flying away, and you with the hat you were trying to catch. His hand was tightly gripping onto yours and there were silly, drunk, lovesick smiles on both your faces as you were being soaked from the rain.  

“We’re insane,” you sniffled, realizing how batshit crazy it really was to party during a hurricane. 

As you were looking at other photos, you heard heavy footsteps coming down the stairs. You looked over at the bottom of the staircase, seeing Joe coming down in comfy clothes and wet hair which meant he showered and came out of his office at some point. 

“At least he wasn’t in there for the entirety of these two hours looking at stuff from the game,” you thought to yourself. 

Joe met your eyes as he walked into the room, seeing how red and puffy they were which was yet another thing that made him feel like absolute shit. He turned his head away at the same time you turned yours and walked into the kitchen, pulling out a glass from the cabinet. 

He started pouring you a glass of water, adding a few ice cubes because he knew you loved to chew on ice after you cried. At first, he didn’t understand the correlation, but then you explained to him that the ice has this cooling effect that can reduce heat and swelling around the face that happens after crying for a while. 

He grabbed the glass from the counter and slowly walked over to the couch, standing in front of you and holding the glass out. “Here,” he softly said, his voice just as heavy as yours which told you that he was crying too.

You slowly looked up at him, noticing that his eyes were also red and puffy. He definitely was crying too. 

“Thanks,” you quietly say as you take the glass from him, taking a big sip and letting the ice cube float into your mouth. 

“At least he remembered the ice,” you thought to yourself, appreciating the fact that he added them. 

You start to chew on the ice as you see Joe plop down on the couch next to you, your body freezing up because you remember everything he said to you earlier. You knew he was coming from a place of anger and guilt, but it still hurt. Joe noticed you tense up next to him, because of him, and that felt like a knife to his heart.

You both stayed quiet, staring at the random re-run of an episode of Friends that was playing on TV, but your minds weren’t focused on what was happening in the show. They were focused on each other. 

Joe felt his bottom lip start to quiver as his eyes once again pooled with tears, all of his emotions were coming out again. He fucked things up with you so bad tonight that he didn’t even know how to fix it. He hurt you. You were just trying to help him for his own good and he shut down on you. He shut you out. The one and only person that he let into his bubble. The one person he needed in his bubble. 

His brain was already crowded with anxiety and fear regarding football, but this was the worst thing out of everything. He didn’t want to go back to that dark place again, he didn’t want to deal with this on his own.

You heard soft sniffles come from beside you so you looked over, your heart shattering again as you saw Joe on the verge of tears, his eyes so red and his lip trembling like he was trying to hold it together. 

He didn’t need to hold it together, not around you. You knew that. You needed to make sure he knew that. “Come here,” you whispered to him as you put your arm around his shoulder and pulled him into your chest.

Joe immediately snaked his arm around your waist and rested his cheek against your chest, letting his tears fall from his eyes onto your pink tank top. You wriggled your hand into his frosted tip hair, scratching his scalp and pressing kisses to his head as he cried harder into your chest. 

You hated seeing him cry, but you knew he was feeling a lot right now and he needed to get his feelings out and this was the best way for him to do it. “It’s okay,” you soothed as you rubbed his back. “I’m here,”.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m s- so fucking sorry,” he cried harder. “I didn’t mean to yell at you, I didn’t mean to say all of that horrible shit to you. You don’t deserve any of that, you were just trying to help,”.  

“I know, baby, I know,” you said, blinking away a few of your own tears. “It’s okay,”,

“No, it’s not okay,” he said. “This is all so fucked up. I fucked everything up,” he sobbed. 

“No, you didn’t,” you said to him as you continued to rub his back. “You didn’t fuck anything up, Joe. Everything’s fine,”.  

“I did. I fucked up in the game and then I fucked up things with you. Nothing’s fine,” he sniffled. 

“Listen, Nothing's gonna hurt you, baby. As long as you're with me, you'll be just fine,” you said to him before pressing a kiss to his forehead. “Like I said earlier, I’m right here. Just talk to me,”.

“...You’re right,” he sniffled, breaking through the mental wall he had built. “You belong in my bubble, I can’t keep you out of it,”.

“So don’t,” you said, pulling him in tighter. 

“I’m scared,” he breathed out a few seconds later. “I feel guilty about everything. This game was supposed to be different. I was supposed to be different. I feel like all of this was my fault because I wasn’t as ready as I thought I was. This was my first game back and I played like absolute shit out there,”.

“Oh, Joe,” you said as your face dropped as well as your heart. 

“I disappointed everyone. Most importantly, I disappointed you. Even after everything you told me last night, I couldn’t do it. Everything that could’ve gone wrong went wrong and I didn’t do anything to fix it,” he said as a few more tears fell from his eyes.

“You didn’t disappoint anyone, Joe. Nobody expected you to go out there and play like you had a completely normal year. You went through so much with this injury, obviously things weren’t going to go back to normal in one game,” you gently said. “And you could never disappoint me. I told you, I know you. The public doesn’t know you like I do so they’re going to run with whatever bullshit they want as an explanation for why the game went the way it did. I know why things went the way they did, I’m not disappointed in you at all. I’m proud of you for going out there and doing what you did today,” you said as you pressed another kiss on his forehead and moved your hand back up to his soft hair. 

“I just feel like I had the shinest wheels, you know? There was so much hype and fire around me when I first got drafted, but ever since then, I’ve just disappointed everyone. It feels like the wheels are rusting. I know what everyone’s been saying, and I get it. I would say the same thing if I was in their shoes. It’s been 5 years of nothing but injuries, slow starts, and coming up short. I feel like I’m falling behind everyone, everyone keeps getting better and I feel stuck. Right now, all of my cages are mental and that’s why I’m scared. If I keep doing this, I’m wasting my potential. I’m stuck as the ‘injury prone’ and ‘wasted potential’ quarterback,” he said, the vulnerability in his voice comforting you because it meant he was letting you in.

“I haven’t done what I promised to do when I got drafted, so why should people believe me when I say that I’m built for this? Why should they believe me when I say that this year will be different? And you know what? They don’t believe me, at least not anymore and I saw that today. They see right through me. Even I see right through me,” he said.

“Can you see right through me?” he asked you, looking up into your soft eyes. 

“Yes,” you nodded, his brows furrowing at your response. “Not in that way though,” you added. “I see right through you because I know you. That’s why I knew you weren’t fine the second you walked out of the locker room. Remember, the media, the fans, and the public don’t see through you, they only see the surface level because they don’t know you. They don’t truly know how hard you work, how strong you are, how much passion you really have for this. They’re going to spew whatever bullshit they want because that’s what they do. If they were in your shoes, then they would know why these things happen and the reality of the situation. They can’t see through you, I promise. And as for the not getting better, you’re crazy if you think that. I saw you in practice, your throws have never looked better. You have never looked better, all this muscle and beefiness is a part of getting better. And like I told you yesterday, you control the narrative. You don’t have to be the ‘injury-prone’ quarterback, you can change it. Deep down, you know who you are. Don’t let these trolls and interlopers define you,”. 

Joe nodded as he felt his breaths steady out and his tears start to dry up. “I played scared yesterday, and I don’t know why? I thought I was ready, you know? We weren’t supposed to lose that game,”.

“I know,” you sighed. “But you’ve gone through so much these past 5 years, it’s completely normal to be hesitant and nobody should be blaming you for this. Yesterday’s loss wasn’t just on you. You’re on a team, Joe. They didn’t play perfectly either and the blame shouldn’t only fall on you. You’re a piece to the puzzle, a big piece, but not the only piece. The media always wants to pin everything on one person. One thing that I admire about you is how easily you block out the outside noise, don’t change that. Block it out like you always do,”. 

“This is game 1 out of 17. Don’t let this define you and don’t let the noise get to you,” you said as you used your thumb to rub the skin underneath his eye, wiping away the wet tear trails.

Joe nodded again, taking in all of the words you were saying to him. You were right, about all of it. He was so in his head about everything and so panicked that he couldn’t use logic and sense to think clearly. This was just one bump in the road as you explained. He had 16 more games to play and 16 more opportunities to show everyone what he’s made of. 

“You’re right,” he nodded. “This was one game. I can take this, learn from my mistakes, and get better,”.

“That’s exactly what I like to hear,” you smiled after hearing him work through his complicated feelings. “You’re going to get better. The team is going to get better. If you want to fix the blaring issues, do it with a calm, collected, and cool mind. You’re called ‘Joe Cool’ for a reason. Live up to that name,” you giggled. “Don’t lose your cool, don’t lose your composure over shit like this. I know you feel awful about how things went today, but one bad game doesn’t define a player and doesn’t define the entire season. Things were rough, but you always, no, you will bounce back,”.

“Thank you,” he sniffled against your chest, his brain feeling like it had just been given a nice comfy king-sized bed and cloud-like blanket to sleep in for the night. You were the only person that could make him turn his brain off and he couldn’t thank you enough. “I think I just got panicked after seeing everyone’s reactions and seeing how things looked out on the field plus everything I was feeling yesterday made it worse,”.

“Of course,” you smiled as you gave his head another kiss before holding him tighter against you. “And I get it. Sometimes it feels like the walls are caving in but that’s why it’s always important to talk to someone when you feel that way. Bottling up those feelings only makes it worse,”.  

“You're 100% right, Y/N. I’m sorry about earlier,” he said while looking up into your eyes again. “That was so fucking uncalled for. And I’m sorry for raising my voice, I was a dick to you the entire night,”. 

“It’s okay,” you smiled. “You were a dick, I agree,” you began to say, earning a laugh from Joe which made your heart smile, “But you’re my dick and I know how to handle you,” you smiled, then quickly furrowed your brows. 

“Wait, that doesn’t sound right at all,” you slapped your hand against your mouth after realizing what that sounded like, another laugh coming from Joe’s mouth. 

“I know what you mean,” he smiled. “But seriously, everything I said was straight bullshit. You mean the world to me and without you, I really think I would end up in an insane asylum. You’re the single most important thing in my life and I appreciate everything you do for me. Don’t ever leave me alone if I ask you to. Like please, I can’t live without you. Chain yourself to my wrist if you need to,”.

“Noted,” you smiled. “Just don’t freak out on me like that again, okay? You worked so hard this past year to get out of that zone, break free from that dark cloud, and I don’t want to see you back there,”. 

“I promise I won’t go back there and if I ever feel like I am, you’ll be the first person I come to. I’m never going to keep you out of the bubble again,” he said as he pressed a kiss to your chest. “I love you,” he said with another kiss to your chest.

“I love you too,” you smiled down at him. “I love you like a lot a lot,” you giggled, echoing what he said to you after his wrist surgery. 

“You know, sweet talking and hugs do make everything better,” he laughed as he looked up at you with his child-like smile you loved to see. 

“Oh, I know,” you winked. “But you still feel pretty stiff right now. Are you sure you’re 100% okay?”. 

“I think it’s just all the tension that I didn’t get to release out on the field. And I guess everything that happened after made it worse,” he grimaced. 

“Ah, that makes sense,” you nod, trying to think of a way to help him get his tension out because you knew if he didn’t, he’d be whiny all night about it. “How about some hot, post-loss sex to make you feel better?” you wiggled your eyebrows and asked. 

Joe’s eyes jumped up to meet yours as he was a bit taken aback by your straightforwardness. “For real?” he asked as he got up from your chest. 

“Mhm, the perfect way to get the tension and aggression out,” you said while licking your lips and giving him a sultry smile. 

“I love you, so fucking much,” he growled in your ears before shooting up from the couch, snaking his arms under you, lifting you up, and leading you up to the bedroom bridal style.

“At least the wrist seems to be just fine,” you giggled as he quickly ran up the stairs with you. 

Not even 5 minutes later, you two were mostly naked, on the bed, and attached to each other’s lips as if you had never kissed each other before. His lips moved against yours hungrily, signaling that he was feeling that way tonight and that you should brace yourself for what was to come.

You felt him pull away from your lips and start pressing wet, sloppy kisses down your body. “I thought we were getting right to it?” you asked him as you felt his gentle lips on your belly. 

“Mmm, I gotta make it up to you first, then we can get to it,” he smiled up at you. 

“But I said I-,”.

“Nope. I have to make you feel good first, you deserve it,” he winked before he continued to kiss down your body. You felt him attach his lips to the skin of your inner thigh, rhythmically sucking and biting which would surely leave a mark while his hands crept up to the waistband of your lace panties. He then moved his lips to press a kiss to your clothed core before pulling your underwear down, tossing it to the side, and then flashing you a devilish grin since he saw how you were squirming around on the bed because of the undeniable ache between your thighs. 

The next few minutes passed by like a blur and the next thing you knew, Joe’s head was buried deep in between your thighs and your back was arching off the bed. “Joe,” you moaned as you felt him push you back down, the expert swirl of his tongue sending jolts of pleasure throughout your body. “J- Joe,” you whispered, your head falling to the side as your eyes fluttered shut. 

Joe couldn’t help but smile into you as he continued to eat you out like a starved man, the beautiful sounds coming from your mouth making his heart happy but also, his dick.

“Mmm, fuck..,” you whimpered as you gripped the silk sheets, tossing your leg over his shoulder and lightly gliding your foot along his muscular back. The sudden touch made Joe groan into your core which sent vibrations throughout your body, your heated touch feeling like fire against his cold frame.  

He continued to lap at your drenched folds, all while his hands were tightly gripping your hips and massaging your plush skin. “You’re so fucking good at this,” you whispered with another loud moan following after as you felt his perfect ski-slope nose rubbing against your aching clit.

You placed a hand into his hair, softly pulling on the strands as you pushed him closer to your core and yet another moan came from your mouth. Joe lifted his head out from in between your thighs and looked up at you, “You’re extra vocal tonight,” he smirked, his lips and chin coated with your wetness. 

“Shut up,” you whined before you pushed his head back down, a smile appearing on your lips when you felt him attach his lips to your bundle of nerves and flick your clit with his warm tongue. You felt yourself fading away, getting lost in the sensual supernova that was happening down below.

“...Oh my god,” you whined a few seconds later, feeling him thrust a finger into your core which pushed you closer to your orgasm even faster than before. “Don’t stop,” you said while pulling on his hair, your leg lightly wrapping around the back of his neck. 

You felt him move his other hand down, his thumb resting on your clit as he rubbed slow circles around the bundle of nerves–this movement made you see stars. The combination of his thumb rubbing your clit, his finger thrusting in and out of your slick core, and his mouth going unhinged was making the imaginary band in your stomach tighten harder than it ever had before. 

“I’m close,” you whimpered, your hips gently bucking at the jolt of pleasure moving through your body. “I’m..s- so…c- close,” you whimpered, this time a little louder because his thumb started moving faster around your clit. You then feel him add another finger into your core, your hips grinding against the bed as you search for any form of relief, but the only thing that could relieve you was taking his sweet time. 

“Baby, please,” you begged, your eyes fluttering shut as your back arched off the bed again, his fingers rapidly thrusting in and out of your core while you felt a more extreme feeling begging to be released from inside of you. “Oh, fuck,” you moaned, the feeling about to break through in just a few seconds.

Joe curled his fingers inside of your core and moved his mouth back up to your clit, roughly attaching his mouth to the bud and sucking you in a way that he knew drove you crazy. And then just a few seconds later you dropped back down to the bed as you felt yourself tip over the edge, his name falling from your lips like some seductive chant while you came undone. “Joe!” you screamed, tightly closing your eyes and feeling your entire body shake with the force of your orgasm. 

Joe looked up through his eyelashes, watching you restlessly move around and hearing breathy moans leaving your beautiful mouth as he lapped at the juices of your intense–still going–orgasm. He was slowly getting more and more worked up as he watched you come apart, knowing he was the only man who had ever seen you this vulnerable and raw and was the only man who was going to see this. 

A minute later you open your eyes, your chest heaving as you recover from the intense high that washed over you, “Holy fuck,” you panted as you saw Joe smiling at you, his lips and chin completely covered in your release, his face showing that he somehow enjoyed this just as much as you did. 

“Did I just-,” you asked, feeling the soaked sheets below you, as you caught your breath. Your eyebrows shoot up in amusement as you watch Joe wipe his chin with his fingers before using his tongue to lick them clean. 

“Yeah,” he chuckled, “You did,”. 

“Oh my god,” you said, hiding your face with your hands out of embarrassment. 

Joe let out a throaty laugh before kneeling on the bed again and hovering over you, then moving your hands off of your face, “Why are you hiding,” he smiled.

“Because I just…,” you said while biting your lip, his bedroom eyes making you want to pounce on him right that second even though you also wanted to run and hide for some reason.

“What?” he said while trying to hold back his cocky smile. “Squirted?” he asked while moving your hair out of your face.

“You don’t have to say it like that…,” you said while hiding your face again. 

After all this time, you still felt shy around him. He’d seen your most embarrassing moments, your best and your worst. He’d seen it all. The fact that you felt embarrassed about this little thing was adorable and another reminder that you were the most precious girl he had ever met. 

“Don’t feel embarrassed, babe. It’s not the first time and it’s definitely not the last time,” he softly said while leaning down to kiss your forehead. “I think it was super hot and super sexy,”. 

“Really?” you asked while peeking out at him through your fingers.

“Mhmmm. Besides, I’ve seen way worse than this. Can’t forget the time I walked in on you fingering yourself while I was away at practice,” he grinned from ear to ear, as if he was proud that he made you so worked up even when he was away from you.

“Joseph Lee,” you screamed while playfully slapping his bare chest.

“Hey, it was a great show,” he shrugged. “I can still remember the sounds,” he said while clearing his throat. “Oooh, Joe. Ohhh Joe, fuck. Joe, ah… Joey!” he moaned as he mimicked you, all while laughing because he couldn’t be serious about it. 

“You know, I don’t have to offer an outlet for you to release your tension,” you shrugged as you started to get up from the bed but felt yourself being caged in by your large boyfriend. 

“Ahem, I don’t think that’s how this works, baby,” he shook his head. “Once you put something on the table, you can’t take it off,”.

“Oh yeah?” you teased. “What if I do?”.

“You don’t wanna know,” he whispered in your ear before slamming his thick cock into your dripping entrance with no warning. 

“Joe,” you gasped, the sudden feeling of him stretching you out and filling you up so extreme and lively. 

“That’s it, baby,” he groaned as he threw his head back, his cock moving at an instantaneous pace. “That’s it…,” he said again but a little quieter while he dropped his head to the crook of your neck, the feeling of your warm walls wrapping around him so intense and special. 

“Joe, fuck,” you whimpered as you felt his cock repeatedly slam into your cervix, his body moving against yours recklessly and roughly. His thrusts quickened as he moved deeper and deeper inside you, the sounds of your breathy moans getting louder with each snap of his skilled hips. He sported a euphoric look on his once-tired face, a sign that he felt relaxed and it was all to your credit. 

The next few minutes were hot, steamy, and messy as he whispered filthy praise into your ear which matched the pure vulgarity that was happening between you two on the bed right now. His hard thrusts made it difficult for you to hold it together, your nails clawing at his tan back as you bit down on his shoulder and got lost under his touch. “You’re so good to me,” he moaned in your ear, his hand moving up and wrapping around your throat. 

“Joe,” you struggled to moan, feeling his grip around your throat becoming a little tighter as the pleasure inside of you was rapidly building.

“Ah, fuck,” he panted as he picked his head up and cupped the back of your leg, and lifted it over his shoulder; this new position opened you up even more and made it easier for him to hit all the right spots inside of you. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he whimpered, the sight of his lip in between his teeth and his thick body moving against you making your eyes roll to the back of your head. 

“I’m close,” you moaned as you looked down, moaning again at the sight of his shaft rapidly moving in and out of your slick heat.

“Fuck, me…too,” he groaned, his pace getting rougher and rougher as sounds of your skin slapping against each other echoed throughout the room. “I love you,” he moaned loudly once he felt his cock start to twitch inside of you. 

“Joe, fuck…please, I need to come,” you whined, his grip on your leg getting tighter. 

“I know baby, I know,” he whimpered, “I’m almost there,” he added as he dropped your leg and moved his hand to the headboard, gripping it tightly as he used it as leverage to slam into you even harder. All the tension, all the aggression, it was all coming out in the most fruitful way possible. He was getting away from himself, and it was all thanks to you. 

“Ah, fuck,” you screamed, feeling yourself on the brink of pleasure, stars filling your eyes as his pace remained rough and hard. 

A few seconds later, you felt him shoot endless ropes of cum into your wet heat which were accompanied by another loud moan from him. “Fuck. Oh fuck,” he panted as he slowed his thrusts into you, making sure that his release stayed inside of you and that you reached your high.

“Joe, please,” you pleaded, needing to feel your high right this second. 

“I’ve got you,” he said while giving you a lazy smile, his hand moving down to your clit and rubbing rapid circles around the sensitive bud as he slowed his thrusts even more.  A few seconds later, you clamped down on his cock, arched your body up into him, and felt yourself let go for the second time tonight. “Oh my god,” you moaned before you felt him press gentle kisses all along your neck and eventually your face, your lips meeting in a sloppy kiss as your highs washed over you. 

A few minutes later, you were both lying against the messy sheets, your head tucked into his chest as he played with your hair and once again apologized to you for how he acted earlier tonight. 

“Joe, I promise, It’s okay,” you giggled. “You’ve made it up to me in more ways than one. The fact that I can’t walk right now is an apology enough,”. 

“Okay, I’ll stop now,” he smiled. “Thank you for everything though. This and for everything you said earlier,”. 

“No need to thank me, baby. I told you, this is my job. We’re in this together and I promise that nothing’s going to hurt you as long as you’re with me. Like I said to you back in November, I’m your protector,” you grinned. 

“That you are,” he laughed, his body feeling loose and light under you for the first time all day. 

“Thank god he feels better," you smiled to yourself. Joe was the most important thing in your life, having him relaxed, focused, and calm was all you wanted. He deserved all the happiness, success, and love in the world and you needed to make sure he knew that. Moments like this were going to happen all throughout his career, but they were controllable and you were a big reason as to why they were. He wasn't kidding when he said he needed you inside his bubble or he'd end up in the insane asylum. You were his safe haven, his place of tranquility, his calm in the storm.

“I love you more than anything, Joe. Everything's going to be alright, I promise,” you smiled up at him, then leaned in for another kiss before you felt him pull the sheets over you both. 

“I love you too, Y/N,” he smiled as he nuzzled his nose against yours and leaned in for another kiss. 

–The End–

part 2 is on the masterlist!

[cellophanejpeg]

two is better than one | s. hanta ft. k. denki

s: What was supposed to be a night alone with Sero turns into something more once you see Kaminari is just as a freak as you are.

w: threesome, recreational drug use, smut, explicit smut, sex, smut smut smut

n: heyy, i have two more chapters left for these series, however i've reached a writer's block, so i'm not sure when they'll be posted lol. feedback is appreciated and i'll miss this story so much when it's done (i might be stalling a bit ngl). anyway, beta read by jemifiss as usual! | read on ao3

previous | next | start here

“Are you kidding me?” You whisper, stepping into Sero’s apartment.

“Sorry.” He takes the bags from your hands and closes the door behind you.

It’s been almost two months since you and Sero had some time for yourselves and tonight you thought you’d have a private moment in his apartment. However, upon entering his apartment, you notice Kaminari slouched over the living room couch. His face tells you he’s high out of his mind.

“He just showed up,” Sero explains, leading you to the kitchen.

“I thought we were gonna…” You trail off, hinting at the one thing you've been expecting all week.

“I know, sorry…” He's still smiling as he digs into the snacks you've brought.

“Are you–” you push his shoulder so he looks at you, “Are you high right now?”

Sero looks like a deer caught in headlights. His smile falters for a second, his eyebrows curl upwards, and he shrugs, getting caught.

“Guilty,” he says, giggling as if he was caught stealing from the cookie jar.

You groan, “Alright, you know what? I can come back another day–”

You're already walking out of the kitchen, ready to put your shoes back on and leave, when he runs after you, wrapping his big hands on your shoulders.

“Wait, no! We can watch a movie! Kaminari brought some brownies you used to like.” He pleads with a soft voice.

A sigh leaves your lips, shoulders sagging, “Hanta, you know I don’t do that anymore…”

When the war was over, you had to go back to school and pretend nothing had happened, which was proven to be the worst to happen. You used to have panic attacks, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t handle loud noises – one time, you even lashed out at Bakugou for yelling in class –, so Sero introduced you to edibles, as a last resort. It wasn’t until the school had started offering mandatory counseling sessions that you finally started to fall asleep without getting high.

“Okay, okay, so hang out with us?” Sero smiles at you, still gripping your shoulders tightly, “I miss just being with you… Not just fucking your brains out.” He chuckles under his breath.

You sigh again, closing your eyes.

“Fine. But if he eats all my snacks, I’m leaving.”

“Look who it is!” Kaminari exclaims when you enter the living room. You smile, plopping down on the couch beside him. Of all Sero’s friends, Kaminari is the one you’re closest to. You don’t talk to him on the regular, but you’re definitely more comfortable having a conversation with him than with anyone else in the friend group. Maybe it’s because he’s so close to Sero. Or maybe because he makes you laugh just the same. “You gotta tell me…” He slouches an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him, “How big is it?”

“What are you talking about?” You frown, grabbing the remote to choose a movie for the three of you to watch.

“You know, Sero’s dick.”

You freeze, heart dropping to your stomach. Slowly, you turn your head to face Sero, on your left side. He’s drinking from a soda can when you start staring daggers at him.

“What?” he asks, noticing your furious eyes set at him.

“You told him?!” Your voice is louder than you intended, but it still makes Sero startle and Kaminari remove his arm from around your shoulders.

“I might have…” Sero brings his shoulders to his ears, slightly scared of you. He’s never seen you so angry like that before.

“Aw, c’mon, baby.” Kaminari chimes in, coming closer to your ear, “You don’t have to be embarrassed, it’s okay.”

“I’m not embarrassed!” You argue, trying to pull away from him, “I just never thought Hanta was the type to kiss and tell.”

Sero’s eyes widen as you stand up from the couch and face him. In a quick movement, he leaps from the couch and kneels before you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your lower belly.

“I’m sorry, angel!” He whines, “I was just so happy I couldn’t keep it to myself, I’m so sorry, I promise I’ll make it up to you!”

“What are you talking about?” You try to pry his arms open to be free of him, but his grip is too strong. You look down at his bloodshot eyes and something stirs inside you. Maybe it’s the way he kneels to you, the submissive look in his eyes, but you feel your face so hot that you have to look away.

“I’ll eat you out,” Sero quickly says, pushing your skirt up, trying to bunch up the fabric to have access to you, “I know it’s been a while–”

“Hanta!” You try to hold his hands, very aware that his friend is sitting on the couch, watching the scene. Your fingers desperately grip the hem of your skirt as your eyes shoot to Kaminari, who’s made himself comfortable by leaning back on the couch, sipping from his soda. He has a weird look on his face, like he isn’t shocked about Sero’s actions, “Wait– Kaminari is here–”

“He likes to watch,” Sero mumbles as he finally gets access to your underwear, pulling them down and pushing your skirt up.

“What–”

“And Sero’s always a horndog when he’s high,” Kaminari says.

Sero’s fingers slip in your folds, opening you up, his tongue following right after. You hold back a moan as realization falls on you.

“You’ve done it before?”

Kaminari breathes out a laugh, setting his drink on the coffee table and standing up. Sero pulls your underwear even further, a hand wrapping around your ankle so you lift it up, freeing one leg from the undergarment. He dives into you further, putting your free thigh on his shoulder. In a second, Kaminari is behind you, hands slipping under your shirt and tickling your waist.

“You mean have we fucked before?” He says in your ear, “Or have we shared someone? Because the answer is yes, either way.”

The thought of Sero and Kaminari – and probably someone else – in bed makes your breath hitch. You’re shocked to find out your childhood best friend is a horny bastard, but the idea turns you on more than you’d like to admit. Or maybe it’s the way Sero’s tongue rubs deliciously against your clit as his fingers nudge your entrance.

“And you know what, angel?” Kaminari whispers, licking your earlobe, “I’m also a horndog when I’m high.”

His mouth latches at your neck, giving your skin open mouthed kisses, sucking and nibbling, and you can’t hold back anymore. Sero’s fingers finally press inside you, now that you’re wet enough, and you have to hold yourself on his shoulders for balance. If it wasn’t for Kaminari’s grip on you, you’d definitely have fallen over already.

“She likes that.” Sero mumbles against you, when you squeeze his fingers inside you, as Kaminari nibbles your ear, sending chills through your skin.

“Hanta…” Your hands tangle in his hair as you slightly grind on his face.

“Say the word, and we’ll stop.” Kaminari’s hands slip under your shirt further, until they reach your breasts. He grabs them with a light grip, massaging the muscles, until he finds your nipples and pinches them softly. A whine escapes your lips, your orgasm already building inside you.

A turn from your head and your lips press against Kaminari’s, kissing him fervently, the more you feel pleasure growing in your lower stomach. You squeeze your eyes shut as Sero’s fingers curl inside you, pressing on that spongy spot that makes you go crazy. A particular twist of your nipples, combined with a suck of your clit, have you coming undone, whining into Kaminari’s mouth. Your legs almost give out, but he holds you in place as Sero stands up and grabs your chin, pulling you away from his friend.

Sero kisses you roughly, hands pulling your shirt up to expose your breasts. His rough hands squeeze your breasts, harshly pinching your nipple and making you whimper. You notice he’s more dominant when he’s with Kaminari, who’s softer and gentler. Sero’s lips leave yours so he can kiss Kaminari, only pulling away so he can pull your shirt over your head, discarting it on the floor.

“Bed. Now.” He squeezes your cheeks before pulling you and Kaminari by the wrists towards his bedroom.

Kaminari undresses his shirt on the way to Sero’s room, unbuckling his belt as you reach the bed. Sero is already shirtless, pulling his sweatpants down, and rummaging his bedside drawer. He pulls a pack of condoms from it and rips one off, throwing it at Kaminari who laughs at his eagerness. Meanwhile, you try not to think about what is happening as you take your skirt off, finally baring yourself completely to the two men in the room.

Sero lies on the bed, back against the headboard as you crawl over to him. His cock sits hard against his lower abdomen when you wrap your delicate hands around it. You stroke him, licking the tip and going slow, like you know he likes. Kaminari positions himself behind you, fidgeting with the condom Sero tossed at him, and you twitch, anticipation pumping in your veins. He lifts your hips, having your ass up, runs his fingers through your folds.

“Fuck,” Kaminari whines as he pushes inside you. You’re so wet and open from your last orgasm that he slides in easily, as he refuses to give you time to adjust to his length.

A gasp leaves your lips as Sero’s hand flies to the back of your neck, the other cupping your cheek. You roll your eyes back as Kaminari sets on a punishing pace, much rougher than you’re used to. A squeeze of your cheeks makes you refocus your eyes on the man in front of you, who watches you intensely. If you weren’t being fucked out of your mind, you’d notice the moment of soberness in his eyes.

The way your body bounces back and forth with each thrust from Kaminari, the moans that leave your mouth, the trembling from pleasure of your hands as you stroke Sero – all these details give him a weird sensation in his chest. Is he having a panic attack? It wouldn’t be the first time it happened while he was high. But, no. This is unlike any other feeling he’s ever had. He’s always wanted to be with you in a carnal way, but this is something else.

He leans down to kiss you, soft lips a contrast to the rough pace of Kaminari, and then he pushes your head down, leading you towards his cock again. He doesn’t want to feel his heart thumping for no reason. So he makes you wrap your lips around him, pushing you further, until he hits the back of your throat and you gag. Your fingers tighten their grip on Sero's thighs as you force your way out of his hold, gasping for air.

“Can't breathe!” You exclaim, wet lips and tears running down your face.

Kaminari’s thrusts falter, recognizing the look of worry in Sero's face as he cups your face again and brings you to a kiss.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry,” Sero whispers, kissing your lips, your cheeks, your nose, “I'm sorry, angel.”

The softness in his voice would've had your stomach doing backflips, if it wasn't for Kaminari pounding his cock inside you. Prompted by a look of reassurance of his best friend, Denki resumed his rough pace, making you gasp again. Sero pulls you to him, wrapping his arms around you, at the same time Kaminari does the same, fingers digging in your hips and pulling you roughly towards him. You all adjust the position, so your face is resting against Sero's chest, but your ass is still up for Kaminari. 

“Can't believe you were keeping this cunt all to yourself,” Kaminari groans, slapping your ass cheek roughly as he pushes his cock inside you again. You yelp, shutting your eyes with pleasure.

“You like it?” Sero mumbles to you, “You like when he's rough like that?”

You murmur a whine in response that he assumes is a yes. Sero cups your breasts gently, such a contrast to Kaminari's harsh  movements.

“Are you gonna come all over his cock, like the good girl you are?”

“Fuck, keep talking like that and I'm gonna come all over,” Kaminari grunts, slapping his hips on your ass.

“That's a good thing I'm not talking to you then,.” Sero barks back, and you'd laugh at their interactions if it wasn't for the fact you felt an overwhelming orgasm coming.

Then, Kaminari does something that has you almost breaking down. He presses his thumb on your back entrance, as if he's going to finger it. It's just a tease, but it's enough to make you see stars as you succumb to your pleasure, letting all out on him, on the sheets, everywhere.

“Whoa!” Kaminari laughs, “Why didn't you say you were a squirter, baby?!”

Because I'm not, you want to say, but you feel like you're going to pass out. You barely register him slowing down his thrusts and cursing as he comes, following right behind you. You just collapse on Sero's chest, trying to focus on his face. He's half soft now, and you feel bad because you don't think you can handle one more round.

“You didn't come,” you whisper as Kaminari leaves for a moment to fetch a towel so he can clean himself.

“I don't mind,” Sero whispers back.

“But–” you try to wrap your hands around him again, but he just holds it, lacing your fingers together.

“It's okay, angel.”

Before you can argue further, Kaminari is back with a fluffy towel and, soon enough, he's wiping your legs, drying as much as he can.

“Bath?” Sero asks, rubbing his thumb on your cheek.

“Yes, please.”

“Your wish is my command.” He kisses your forehead, hopping off the bed and going toward the bathroom.

Kaminari scoffs as he lays on his back, wiping the sweat from his forehead and sighing heavily.

“What?” You ask, pulling the sheets up to cover your chest. Not that it would do anything to hide your body from him now that he's seen everything. You're trying not to think about how you're going to face him in the next group hang out, when he answers your question,

“He must really like you. Sero's never satisfied until he's finished,” Kaminari laughs again, “And running you a bath? I mean, he gives aftercare, but he's not exactly the king of it, you know?”

“What do you mean?” Confusion is clear in your voice as you lean on your elbow to face him better.

“All I'm saying is that, every time we've been together, he's never acted like that.” He explains, “Maybe he's got a soft spot for you…”

You try not to hold on to the hope he might have the same feelings as you, but it's stronger than you. The way he's been so soft to you during this entire night has the butterflies inside your stomach going crazy. Your heart skips a beat at the possibility of you and him staying together.

“What are you guys talking shit about?” Sero resurfaces from the bathroom, still naked, leaning on the doorframe. You hold back a dreamy sigh.

“You,” Kaminari replies, a shit eating grin on his face.

Sero groans, rolling his eyes at his friend.

“Anyway.” Kaminari jumps out of the bed, stretching his arms above his head. “Same time next week?”

Sero groans even louder as you bark out a laugh.

@lousypotatoes @shoyosdoll @fresa-luna @crazyvalerie1236 @siillkie

[omar-bb]

notes & quotes from omar's live today

he wanted to release Red Light sooner but he and his team wanted to get it right

he's excited to headline at Gröna Lund - gonna be playing a new song there and at his other shows this summer!

"one of my favorite songs. i'm telling you, you will fucking choke when you hear that one. it's dark, it's dirty, it's groovy..."

"should I leak some of it? it would be fun for you to be able to sing along..."

"i hope it's fine by my team that I just leaked that"

"maybe it'll be the next single after Red Light. only maybe. I'm not promising anything"

someone asked about an Asia tour - "I cannot be live bc I'm gonna leak a lot of shit. But you wanna know something funny? This song .... it is actually a k-pop pitch song from start. it was made with k-pop in mind. it is not fully k-pop and now that i've been doing my touch on it, it is a little less k-pop but.. they actually wrote the song k-pop in mind."

teased doing a tour in the future

another "leak" - "I was actually meant to go to korea like right now or a month ago, like after the oscars ... i was supposed to go to korea. but it never happened. i was very sad. but maybe one day.

he had a scared moment where music started playing in the other room and he thought it was an unreleased song but it was just his alejandro tiktok lol

inspo for red light? "I didn't write the song ... it was a demo that got sent to me. at first ... it was a girl singing red light, and when i heard it the first time i was like yo this sounds like fucking rihanna ... i was like is this a long lost rihanna song? this is the greatest thing i've ever heard. and then i just fucking took it. i was like this is my song before rihanna takes it from me. and now it's my song."

Red Light music video when? "we shot a visualizer, so it's not a music video ... it's very beautiful. very stunning. i've never done anything like that. ... it's not a real music video. it's more visuals for the song."

will be doing red light on 25 may and also a new song

"you'll hear a whole new omar when you hear that song"

he has been replying to messages in his community on whatsapp and sms. they'll be leaking more stuff through there

new OMR Beauty product when? "....................... stay tuned"

"you will die when you see the next launch of OMR Beauty. that's all I'm saying. Next!!!"

will he start a fashion brand? "i don't really have the time for that unfortunately. ... not for now"

thinks he is not gonna bleach his hair

Someone asked red light spanish version when? and he sang a bit of it in spanish

omar backflip when? "when i'm in heaven"

is he going to act again?"i'm actually reading some scripts right now. just reading, it's not anything happening really yet, just testing the waters. we'll see, i would love to act. i actually miss acting, it was a fun time ... nothing will ever be like YR obviously, but just the thought of meeting new ppl, new friends, being together for a few weeks or a few months, and filming smth very special, that would be so much fun. ... i'm actually reading a really cool script right now" but more focusing on music right now

he has 40-50 new songs from the last year apparently??? Maybe i misunderstood this

album when? "don't know, we'll see" - he has a lot of songs and could drop an album but he wants it to be perfect so it'll be awhile

there will be red light merch this summer

he and edvin hang out sometimes

not doing Rix FM this year

there will not be 12 red light remixes lol "but maybe a few"

Eurovision 2025? "absolutely not. sorry not sorry." something about always being thrown out of the competition

he's stopped drinking coffee regularly and drinks matcha instead

someone suggested hoemars as the fandom name and he laughed lol

a lot is happening in May he says !! "y'all better eat good, sleep well" lolol

he said he might do another live next week once Red Light is out

[goldfades]

✮ 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐚 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐬, zegras' have more fun

♡ ─ summary | media day pictures (NOT MINE AND IT'S NOT THE FC) and something makes the jack stans go crazy

♡ ─ warnings | light-hearted flirting/arguing, brief mention of hate crimes (ITS A JOKE THOUGH), hughes bros being dumb (not trev for once LMAO)

♡ ─ taglist | tbd

♡ ─ ev's notes | this lowkey eats I MISSED THIS AU

back to navigation back to AU masterlist

stasszegras ann arbor, michigan

Liked by trevorzegras, lhughes_06, jackhughes and 9,935 more

stasszegras | media day pics, first (official) fnl + WENT LOWKEY VIRAL ON TIKTOK???? tagged: pchandler68, umichfootball, lucafantilli september 23th, 2022

View all 1,008 comments

briesbagels | my favorite tiktok influencer 🤭

↳ stasszegras stop it. 😐

↳ briesbagels 3 million views on a tiktok IS CRAZYYY

↳ stasszegras it's only cus luke was in the video

↳ lhughes_06 clout chaser 😝

briesbagels | LAST PIC OF LUCA IS HORRENDOUS PLS STASS 😫😫

↳ lucafantilli ok this one hurts brie, i thought u were on my side

↳ briesbagels its either u or stass (im choosing my girl)

↳ stasszegras 🤭😏😍

↳ pchandler68 hmmmmm 😏😏

↳ adamfantilli 🥸🥸

↳ stasszegras what's goin on here.... 😥

umichwsoccer | THATS OUR GIRL! 🫡〽️

↳ stasszegras 🤞🏼🤞🏼

jackhughes | wowww okay stassie.. 🤞🏼🤩 woo 😮‍💨😮‍💨

↳ trevorzegras 😟😟 oh no

↳ lhughes_06 since when we callin her stassie????

↳ jackhughes WE?? get ur own nickname lukey 😑😑

↳ stasszegras k y'all let's just stick to stass or little zegras 😶

↳ trevorzegras @/griffinzegras

↳ griffinzegras bffr right now 📸📸📸 aren't you like 30 jack??

↳ jackhughes actually i'm 21 so calm the FUCKK down... and i was just being nice and friendly griff come on now

↳ briesbagels and thats why we wear sunscreen kids 🥴

↳ griffinzegras yea maybe a little too friendly..

↳ stasszegras guys im gonna disable my comments if u keep arguing like 12 year olds

↳ trevorzegras mhm yeah and thats the ONLY REASON why you would wanna disable the comments

lucafantilli | last pic should be considered a hate crime bro how'd u even get that

↳ stasszegras don't ask stupid questions like that luca

↳ adamfantilli 🥸🥸

↳ lucafantilli MY OWN BROTHER?!?!?!

↳ lhughes_06 i guess we are all getting betrayed by our flesh and blood rn 😪

↳ jackhughes be so fr rn lukey

↳ trevorzegras agreed luke

↳ jackhughes 😑😑

↳ pchandler68 interesting.. 📸

quinnhughes | you ate little zegras 🫡

↳ stasszegras thanks quinner 🫶🏼

↳ trevorzegras YEA this is really being friendly @/jackhughes

↳ jackhughes bro. let this go.

↳ quinnhughes leave me the fuck outta this guys, please 😁

lhughes_06 | gonna win us a jr world cup zegras ✊🏼

↳ stasszegras YESSS SIR 🫡🫡〽️〽️ but thats not how it works buddy

↳ lhughes_06 there's no jr world cup????

↳ jackhughes messi is rolling in his grave rn

↳ stasszegras messi is alive????

↳ briesbagels no way bro 😭😭

↳ quinnhughes LMAO PLEASE 😭

pchandler68 | LUCA LOL PLEASE HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

↳ lucafantilli count your days chandler

↳ pchandler68 wait no luca im sorry

↳ lucafantilli its ur fault u introduced me and stass and NOW LOOK. all the hoes are gone

↳ stasszegras 😑😑😑

↳ adamfantilli not all of them.....🥯🥯🥯

↳ lucafantilli shut up adam.

↳ pchandler68 wait what??...

adamfantilli future manager AND she plays for our soccer team?? it's perfect 🤞🏼🤞🏼

↳ stasszegras hahaahaha no.

↳ nolan_moyle STASS PLEASE

↳ stasszegras stop harassing me nolan

jhughesnews

Liked by njdevilfan09, briesbagels, zegrasluvr898 and 4,509 more

jhughesnews | jack hughes and anastasia zegras are reportedly going out after he comments a suggestive comment on her most recent post. thoughts???

View all 2,190 comments

fan01 | WHAT?? NO WAY????? WHO WAS GOING TO TELL ME

fan02 | guys they are just friends, if u guys look at her other posts he makes those kinda jokes all the time

↳ fan03 nah bro did u see trevor and griffin's comments? they obviously know something we don't

↳ fan02 yeah but that's their humor

fan04 | good 😭😭😭 for😭😭😭 them 😭😭😭

fan05 | didn't she go out with luke too 😐

↳ fan06 damn she wants the whole crew

↳ fan07 who can blame her tho??? have u seen them 🤭🤭

↳ fan08 no she didn't lmao, those were also JUST rumors and it's obvious they're just friends

fan09 | guys stop it, these are baseless rumors and REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENS TO TAYLOR ALL THE TIME, stass is great just by herself 🫶🏼

↳ fan10 all right girl..

↳ fan11 its giving "coach is right guys... 😣"

↳ fan12 im crying BYEEE PLEASE 😭😭😭😭

-> make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated! <-

thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

[kanmom51]

JK live 5 June 2023 7:03 am KST

Cr./ The creators of the media used in this post.

First thing first - we address the elephant in the room. JK cut his hair!

It's only a trim. Keep telling yourself that. Only a trim.

Breath in, breath out...

But I'm telling you, if he shows up soon with another "just a trim" I'm going to literally lose it. 😭😭

Now after we addressed that are we ok to move on? K?

This my peeps is a close to 2 hour live. I ain't gonna and can't talk about every single thing this man talked about. Not when JK was in such a chatty mood. Nope. No can do. In any case you should be running to watch this, cause the man is friggin adorable, and no matter how many times I say it or describe it, which I definitely will, it's no comparison to seeing him yourself.

JK is happy.

This is the second live we can see that figurative jump in his step.

The man is super chatty, sharing stuff that maybe, just maybe, he wasn't supposed to share (or another theory is that he's done this so his bf doesn't have to talk about that certain thing he promised us he will talk about in his next live...). He's also being an utter brat, and I am loving every single moment of it.

Figures.

I'm putting this here now.

Why, you ask?

Because you remember those Feb 2023 lives? You know, the ones where we felt something was off? When I said it looks like he was struggling, he's off quilter for lack of structure and support?

Well my friends, it looks like our JK is back. With his more or less set schedule. With his Jiminie by his side to be his anchor and his catalyst all in one.

Did I tell you yet how much I love this man?

shhhh, JK wants to set up a movie date with us. Don't tell the company about it though...

The whole conversation is happening but it's literally him just thinking out loud, hilarious.

JK brain power. That man is something so so special. The time and effort it took him to try to figure out what time he will be eating lunch when his dermatologist appointment is at 11 am and he has a workout straight after that. He's hilarious.

It was 1:30 pm. That's what his final result, btw, lol.

Mingyu and the Super dance challenge

I had a whole thing written in my vanishing post about Mingyu and how JK said he'd called him but that he's not serious. Speculating if this will ever come to pass.

Well, looks like JK decided to take things into his own hands now, didn't he?

JK caught him by surprise, so much so that Mingyu did the challenge in his socks. My guess is that JK is telling us all, including the higher ups, that doing this, dance challenges, is going to be on his terms. When he wants. Where he wants. With whoever he wants.

JK being JK

I love how JK tells it how it is.

He reads through the comments, says army is cute and will never change. interacts with comments. Answers questions. But he also isn't afraid to call bull, lol.

For example, loved his reaction to the comment "I'm not going to breath until you read this".

Being savage without being savage, lol.

The rainy day fight

D'ya think I wouldn't talk about this one? No way, no where, no how.

Do we ignore the fact that JK literally scrolled back when seeing the comment?

Nope. I don't think so.

JK saw the comment just run by, and he scrolled back cause he wanted to see it properly, and once he read it, well, of course, answer it. Idk what caught his attention there. Was it the account name? I saw talk and an actual clip showing that from the name it was a clear Jikook account. But then again, saw somewhere else mention that might not be true. This is one I'm not 100% sure about, so will leave it open with a question mark.

Anyway, that smile when reading the comment.

That last one was him reading the comment, not him commenting on if JM is or isn't doing a live.

But in saying that, JK with that smirk,

knew that JM ain't gonna be telling no rainy day story, so he might as well, lol.

The difference between JK describing it and JM, lol.

JM's short version:

JK's is a more lengthy one, although at the end of the day, if you pay attention, you realise that JK didn't tell us what they actually fought about, or more so, what was it that he said to JM to have JM tell him he's on his own from there on...

So, let's talk a bit about the fight, why don't we?

First thing first, JK puts a timeline on the fight, it being during their trainee days. That gives us a clearer time stamp, which would be anywhere between mid 2012 to a day before debut, which is 13 June 2013.

Now, you may ask why is it that JM was so off with the dates? And more so, why didn't JK correct him?

To the first question I say that this fight was way more impactful for JK than it was for JM. JK was the one who wrote a song referencing it. JK is the one that brought it up to start with during Festa 2020, and it took JM a few seconds to register and remember it. He was kind of caught off guard and could have just messed up the on the spot math, or he could have forgotten exactly when it took place.

To the second question I say that possibly JK didn't want to correct JM in front of the cameras, that the timing was less important for him to talk about and more so the fight and the making up. Or, he didn't want to correct him to stop the flow of JM's story telling, or just didn't want to correct him in front of the others, or he did the math wrong too, lol.

Now that we have cleared up the timeline, pre-debut days, let's talk about the fact that the other members clearly did not know about this fight, including Hobi.

This was a fight that happened between the two. Something that had a profound impact on JK. So much so he referenced it in a song. So much so he brought it up to apologise for it once again in during the Festa dinner.

But as impactful as it was for JK, I feel like it didn't have the same affect on JM. Not that it wasn't memorable, because it was, we saw it was, but it wasn't life changing for him as it was for JK. Yes, I think it was life changing for JK.

So, what are my thoughts about why this fight was so etched in JK's mind, so carved into his consciousness, so much so he literally wrote a song about it (that is a hill I am willing to die on) and brought it up in Festa 2020, years later, with so much water under the bridge since then?

All while I don't think it meant the same to JM? Yes he remembered it. Yes it was emotional for him. But it wasn't as impactful as it was for JK.

I am willing to go as far as to state that I feel that this fight was teenager JK's eureka moment as to how important JM was to him. And please do not get me wrong, this is not about JK crushing on JM or realising he is attracted to him. Not then. Not yet. This is way back in 2012-13. But this is about JK realizing that he needs JM. That he wants him by his side, he wants him close as a close friend, as someone to look up to, someone to help guide him, someone to care for him, someone to look out for him, someone who can understand him.

Do we remember this?

Because of Still with you, because JK brought this up 7 years after it happened, because of JK's facial expressions while talking about it, this was a truly meaningful moment for him, in my opinion perhaps the moment where their friendship shifted for JK or more so solidified.

You know what they say? When you think you lost someone is also when you understand just how important they are to you. It takes losing them for you to realise just how important they were to you.

As for JM, well he always had a soft spot for JK. His behaviour through this also shows us that. He didn't scold JK in front of the others, respected him enough to take him aside and try to talk to him. Although he walked out, he answered JK's phone call and straight away went into carer mode. He forgave him pretty much immediately and was almost as emotional as JK was (crying hugging). So yes, it was a fight to remember (he does once JK reminds him of it) but it wasn't as impactful on JM as it was on JK because maybe for him it didn't change the way he felt about JK, while for JK it was, as I mentioned, a moment of clarity, of understanding.

Lee Mujin's Limousine Service April Fool's day - the JM episode.

Well, the episode shows up on JK's YT. Surprise surprise? Not really, lol.

JK's initial statement is that he should watch that...not that he hasn't seen it yet. And why the distinction you may ask? Well, because his behaviour during this was a little puzzling. On the one hand he does things like FF the episode and avoids Lee Mujin calling JM oppa, and you can't think that this was unconsciously done. Or he imitates JM down to the nose touch and it feels like this was not the first time he's seeing this. All while on the other hand his reactions at the start of the episode seem to be of someone watching the episode for the very first time.

Is it possible that JK's oh so accurate imitations stem from him knowing JM oh so well? Down to the nose touch? Of course it is. I mean those two are fully in tune. We've seen so many moments where it's like this is the same person, same brain. So, definitley a possiblity.

Either way, the look on his face and his reactions never lie when it comes to JM.

JK sings Like crazy with JM.

First time he does this. Watch Like crazy with us and join in on the singing. And it's so beautiful.

Do we talk about it? Why it's taken him so long to do this?

Well, obviously I can't know for sure, but I do think that this one is an emotional one for JK.

This song is about JM's struggles during the pandemic. He told us so. Struggles that JK clearly witnessed. Struggles that JK clearly experienced with him. Struggles that JK probably also tried to help him cope with. Obviously this was not an easy time, and if this song was a type of release for JM, for JK it might be reliving something that is still weighing on him. A reminder of helplessness. Of not being able to help JM through. A reminder of the coping mechanisms. A reminder of not being enough.

But that isn't to say JK doesn't love the song. You can see how it does make him emotional, closing his eyes as he sings "you and I" and in several other moments during the song, including towards the end.

And maybe he wasn't ready to show us that just yet in his previous lives.

He was now.

And again, showing us he does like the song, he hums Like crazy again later on in the live.

JK is JM's happy place. That is part of his love language. He makes JM laugh, and many times it's by being his bratty cheeky self.

JK makes JM laugh. In JM's own words, he's his happy virus.

This part is funny and cute and JK just being JK by imitating JM.

And this time it's all about having fun, but JK as a whole mimics JM, not only for fun, but also as a compass, a guide as to how to behave or react. We saw him do it a lot in the younger years. JK wasn't joking when he told JM he's watching him, lol. We certainly do have the receipts for that one.

He has been doing this since forever. So very neuro divergent of him.

@jikookotters said to me after this live that JM should release a book - "My life with a brat".

and

Well, it has bestseller written all over it, guaranteed.

LMAO.

All fun aside, I'd say it's a small price to pay. You know, having a bratty bf that brings a smile to your face in the process. Same man that looks at you like this:

For the whole world to see.

Literally the whole world, having millions of people just sitting there watching him watch JM and melt.

Songs JK listened to and sang for us:

Traffic light - Lee Mujin

Wasurenai TANAKA

Jay Park yesterday (Omg, the lyrics...)

Your love's the sweetest sound Around you, my heart just pounds Your touch, I'll write it down So high, I can't come down Was hopeless, took notice Baby, like a siren, mm, and you gave me faith, oh You're the answer, all my problems solved Life with you is so beautiful, I won't trade it away I was lost but found my purpose now I'm glad you're keepin' me around, I won't trade it away Whether I'm up or down or I wear no crown Love me the same way, the same way you did as yesterday Whether I'm rich or poor, just call me yours Love me the samе way, the same way you did as yestеrday Oh-oh, oh-oh Did as yesterday Your smile is all I need Without you, these lungs can't breathe I'd fall from the sky for you Wanna do better and thrive for you Was hopeless, took notice Baby, like a siren, oh-oh, and you gave me faith You're the answer, all my problems solved Life with you is so beautiful, I won't trade it away I was lost but found my purpose now I'm glad you're keepin' me around, and I won't trade it away Whether I'm up or down or I wear no crown Love me the same way, the same way you did as yesterday Whether I'm rich or poor, just call me yours Love me the same way, the same way you did as yesterday Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Oh-oh-oh-oh Oh-oh Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Oh-oh

I know he's a problematic person, but that song, I definitley get why JK likes it.

I have seen many are worried this is a precursor for him having a collab with Jay Park (we did see JK in his studio last year), and that very well may be. We will just have to wait and see about that.

JK also watched "JK vocals I liked", well tried watching and gave up in the middle because The best of me on replay was just too much for him.

And his G-Dragon imitations, lol.

This was in no way him dissing G-Dragon. This was him being a fan of the man, something he has also shared with us in the past.

OK, Is it time to address the other elephant in the room?

JK's unwillingness to sing a BTS song...lol.

Maybe better not🤣🤣

JK's goodbye to us.

Questions to ask ourselves after watching the live:

Is someone going to explain to JK why the comments are disappearing?

What is JK working on his English super hard for? He makes a point of telling us multiple times during the live that he's working on it hard... I doubt it's only for his TikTok narration for Take two...there is more coming from JK. Question is what and when? Hopefully soon.

So why did JK want us to know about the book he's going to be reading? JK made a point at the start of the live to grab the book and place it on the table in front of him, later to show us the book and tell us he bought it and will read it. Why did JK want us to know about Michelle Zauner or her book? Collab? This is a bit of a stretch, well ok, a huge stretch, but could it be because Michelle Zauner, an openly bisexual woman, married her bandmate Peter Bradley back in 2014? So many questions...

How many times does JK have to mention JM while talking about the rainy day fight?

What was up with JK's glasses? He clearly told us that he needs them. And he was also about to get up go get them, but then stopped and said he's too lazy. But was that it? Really? Or did he just remember/realise that he forgot his glasses at that very place he came from shortly prior to the live? You know, the same place he came from arriving at Brunnen and placing his jacket (is that a motorcycle riders jacket?) on the sofa. Same Jacket he moved aside so maybe we don't notice it too much.

JK getting the book and moving the jacket:

Will we be seeing JK at one of Yoongi's Seoul concerts? Did Yoongi see the live, hear JK's request for a formal invitation up on stage? Lol. JK did say that if Yoongi asks him up, he'll do it... Oh, and do we buy concert tickets for the streaming with those prices???

What's up with JK's YT algorithm?

Do I bring this up again?

Yeah, I guess that explains the algorithm with all the cooking and JM going on there...

Kookie, your obsessions are showing...

What was it with the guitar JK left out to tell us that he's not practicing at all although he should be? At first I thought it might have something to do with JM's acoustic performance, Letter with the guitar, you know, being the JM spoiler king and all.

But now that Take two is out, I can't help but consider perhaps this time it wasn't about JM but more about Take two... the opening guitar. Although (yes, this is me flip flopping here) the opening guitar in Take two is an electric guitar... So yeah, no idea.

Do his neighbours, by this point, have Hybe on speed dial? I mean, I'd love to have JK as a neighbour, I really would? Nah, I lie. I love JK, you know I do, but my god, the noise that man makes, I would be hospitalized by now for sleep deprivation. And the creepy creeps that are out and about looking for him? Nah. Love him, but would rather not be his neighbour, lol.

And last but not least what so ever - why the heck is this man so utterly adorable? This man that on stage is a lean mean killing machine (well, most of the time). How can that be the same person? HOW?

Once again JK has come to us, in his time and on his terms. And once again he's shown us in few words and many actions just how much he loves and appreciates army, and how much he loves JM. He does what he does, says what he says, within the limitations, showing us all his love and support for JM.

He's so friggin loud even those that are unwilling to see are having difficulty ignoring it.

So, are we taking bets on when we're going to be getting him live next? And will we finally be getting a JK Letter sing along? Now that we have an official Letter (Dear.Army) release on YT that is. Now, wouldn't that be an interesting one?

[deedala]

🎇 Happy New Year Friends!! 🎇

From the Diary of Virginia Woolf: January 2, 1931: Here are my resolutions for the next 3 months; the next lap of the year. To have none. Not to be tied. To be free & kindly with myself, not goading it to parties: to sit rather privately reading in the studio. Sometimes to read, sometimes not to read. To go out yes—but stay at home in spite of being asked. As for clothes, to buy good ones.

For today's return to WTW, i thought it might be fun to celebrate the ways in which we survive and manage to find peace and happiness in our one precious life here on Earth. And so...

-----------------------------------

✨W e e k l y 🌟 T a g 🌟 W e d n e s d a y✨

Name: Deanna 🌱

Location: oHIo🌽

Astrological Sign: Scorpio 🦂

What's a TV show or movie you plan to re-watch this year? obvi i'm in a constant state of re-watching shameless but otherwise right now im thinking maybe some bob's burgers, some futurama, austenland...

Whats a book or fic you will probably re-read this year? ooohh you know...the usual suspects tbh: cooperative gameplay, itqd, faffy, love is a ballfield, none the wiser, the menagerie... AND...*IF* DA4 is gonna actually come out soon I'll probably re-read my fav stories from Tevinter Nights!!!

What is a song you will likely continue to play on repeat? uuhh right now its still chappell roan's whole album and hozier's unreal unearth. im sorry for cheating on my own question and basically naming like 30 songs lol

What's a tasty treat you look forward to eating more of this year? i dont think i managed to eat enough chocolate chip cookies last year, i should eat more. also i haven't had an andes mint in forever??? need some of those STAT. oh my god i totally missed out on girl scout cookies last year too!!!

What's a time sink that you will continue to sink time into this year? scrolling tumblr ofc!!!

Did you pick up any habits in 2023 that you plan to continue? not really?? maybe kind of reblogging my own posts more and trying not to feel bad about it??

What's your toxic trait? leaving petty little thoughts in my friends DMs while they're sleeping 😛

What is a coping mechanism you will continue to indulge in this year? ✨disassociation✨

Tell me something you like about how you look! my skin has been pretty nice lately, good job skin. (do you guys remember that old vine of the broken toy that would just say "sssskkiiiiinnnn" when squeezed?? i remember lolol)

Give me at least three adjectives describing things you like about yourself. loyal, generous, thoughtful

----------------------------------- Now for tagging nuggets: additionally I want to thank @mybrainismelted and @jrooc for helping me with this post!! @michellemisfit @mmmichyyy @darlingian @too-schoolforcool @juliakayyy @gardenerian @heymrspatel @heymacy @gallawitchxx @metalheadmickey @mickeysgaymom @thisdivorce @transmickey @tanktopgallavich @lingy910y @suchagallabitch @shippergirl121fic @the-rat-wins @thepupperino @energievie @callivich @lee-ow @purplemagpie @sleepyfacetoughguy @softmick @vintagelacerosette @sam-loves-seb @crossmydna @creepkinginc @suzy-queued @rereadanon @iansw0rld @milkmaidovich @sickness-health-all-that-shit @palepinkgoat @auds-and-evens @ardent-fox 💖

[moon-alight]

Hi was wondering if I could have a Fuma version of how he would he as a Boyfriend, Husband and Father? Thank you ! Also can I be 🌌?

Of course but for now I'll only do boyfriend because I'm busy. I hope you don't mind.

Masterlist

&Team Fuma as your boyfriend

Warnings: none

Word Count: 655

CRUSH PHASE

-Fuma would've been a bit hesitant to ask you out. You're so beautiful and cute so why would you still be single in the first place?

-He would ask someone (probably K or something) to subtly ask whether you're single or not.

-If you're not, he would give up. He respects your relationship and would never hurt you.

-If you're single, he's planning a way in his head to ask you out or get your attention.

-One day he just decides he's had enough of waiting and hiding away so he stalks over to you and simply asks you out in the most casual way ever.

DATING PHASE

-Attentive boyfriend #2

-He has spent a while observing you before you started dating so he knows a lot of your reactions

-What you do when you're happy, surprised, shocked or sad

-Maybe he realized you have some nervous ticks which will alarm him

-He tries his best to always make you comfortable

-The type of boyfriend to put his jacket over your lap if you're wearing a skirt so you're warm and can sit in the way you want

-Would also offer his jacket if you're cold or when you come across fans, he would give it to you to cover you up.

-One of your first dates was at a zoo

-You made some jokes about the penguins and now he calls you 'his little penguin'

-He has a penguin phone background which reminds him of you instead of a direct picture. He thinks this is cuter because its like an inside joke between you two

-Keeps his dating life private from his members but would want to introduce you after a while

-They are such an important part of his life that he desperately wants you to like them

-And when you do like them and the boys like you, he will be so damn happy

-He's fully comfortable in the relationship now and knows its gonna work out long term

-Isn't scared to show his emotions in front of you and will cry when a sad movie is playing

-He would also pull you closer and cuddle you while watching said movie

-Would go out to buy period products if you need them but he would be hella confused when he's in the isle

-Has no clue which ones to buy so he video calls you so you can guide him through it

-It's a process LOL

-Likes lazy days with you spent on the couch or in bed with take out

-Would also like going on little adventures together

-Imagine walking through a forest with Fuma and after a while you realize you're lost and the internet doesn't work around there so now you have to find you're way out

-He would love it

-When you fight he'll be the reasonable one and guide the argument back on track so you can talk it out

-Will never let you leave if you're still angry at him because he doesn't want arguments to just disolve

-If it had gotten you angry, it must be important so he wants to solve it.

-Movie nights

-Marvel movies

-He is so sweet and caring

-Always makes sure you blow on your food before eating because you could burn your tongue

-Has napkins and tissues with him at all times in case your clumsy self fails to think about them

-Reminds you to bring a jacket/sun cream/bag whenever you go out

-A motherly kind of boyfriend

-Also makes sure you've eaten and stay hydrated throughout the day

-Will melt if you check up on him or remind him of things

-Make out sessions everywhere

-Every time you do a tiktok prank on him, he's annoyed

-Just wants you to stop with all those unnecessary pranks

-Poor Fuma

-All in all he loves you very much

-And reminds you everyday of that fact <3

[someone1348]

hii K!

i read your ler!reader x lee!turtles fic, and i was wondering if you could write the turrles getting their revenge?

can you tell im a lee 🧍‍♀️

take care of urself, K. love youu 🫀

Hey Jay! Lol I'd be happy to!

Love you too buddy!

This is part 2 to this story here

Sooo if you haven't read it I suggest reading that one first!

People in this: Ler!Turtles, Lee!Reader

Tw: none (maybe some big teasing) but other than that its adorable

(Y/n)= Your name!

With all that being said Enjoyy! :]

-K

____________~☆°♡°☆°♡°☆~_____________

Leo!:

"Thahats it" he smiled brightly "Cohome here you-" He shouted as he tackled you down to the couch

"LEO WAIT-"

"Awww what's the matter?~ too ticklish to handle what you dish out? Where'd that big ler energy go huh? All lost to my tickly fingers! Coochie Coochie Coo~" He smirked his signature smirk as he skittered his six didgets alll over your tickle spots

"Im gonna getcha'! Over heree and over heree and OOOO HERE! Tickle Tickle Tickleee~ who's the adorable one now! You areee~" He continued eating up alll of your reactions and giggles until he reached your tickle spot

"OKAHAY IM SOHOHORRY!"

"Apology accepted giggles, now you know, never tickle Leonardo Hamato and think there won't be consequences again, m'kay cutie?" He giggled as he rubbed away the ghost tickles

"Wehehe'll see!" You smirked back at him as he giggled along with you

Donnie!:

'I can not BELIEVE they tickled me! Oh they're in BIG trouble now!' He thought to himself before searching the lair to find you

"(Y/n)!" He shouted as he spotted you and used his robot arms from his battle shell to bring you to his lap

"YeaAH!-" you yelped being pulled over before trying to pull your arms down "D! We can talk about this, right?"

"The only thing that will be coming out of your mouth dove are those precious giggles now,, LAUGH FOR ME!" He smirked before scribbling his fingers all over your tickle spots

"DOhohonniEhe! WAhait!"

"I will be waiting for nothing except your laughter! Tickletickletickletickle!" He giggled along with you as he moved to your tickle spot

"IHIHIHIM SOHOHORRY!"

"I accept your apology but I'm not quite finished yet giggles~" he blew a gaint raspberry to your worst spot

"DEHEHE!"

"Much better! You're free to go now and don't you EVER think about sneak tickle attacking me again capiche!"

"We'll seehee!"

Raph!:

He pulled you into a hug "Ihihi love it, buttt you're forgetting somthing" he smirked at you "you forgot that Raph's the biggest tickle monster around!-"

"RAPH-" Your sentence was abruptly stopped and replaced by giggles as he skittered his claws gently over all of your tickle spots

"Coochie Coochie Coo~ awww you have such adorable giggles! Raphie could eat them up allll day!" He smiled brightly as he continued

"RaHaHAPh! NOhoHO!"

"Raph Yesss! This is what you get for tickling the tickle monster and thinking you could get away!" He giggled along with you before he blew a gaint raspberry to your tickle spot

"OKAHAY IHIHIM SOHOHORRY!"

"Who's the biggest tickle monster around the lair?~" His smirk grew as he wiggled his fingers all over your tickle spot

"YOHOHOU!"

"Excellent!" He stopped and rubbed away the ghost tickles, holding you close "Apology accepted giggle bug!"

Mikey!:

"Did you enjoy licking the batter after you attacked me with tickles!" He said with a smile as he looked at you, slowly inching closer as you put the bowl in the sink.

"Yes I did it was extra sweet because of your giggles!" You smirked as he grumbled a little in an embarrassed way before pulling you into a hug from behind

"You had something to snack on now I need something to eat in return!" He smirked as he rested his chin on your shoulder "Your giggles should work perfectly!~" He giggled before scribbling all over your tickle spots

"MIhihikEy!"

"Yes giggles? Awww is it ticklwish?~ I'm gonna getcha'!" He said in a baby voice as he continued moving swiftly from tickle spot to tickle spot

"IhIHim sOHOHORRY! MIHIHIHIKEY WHAHAIT!-"

He smirked as he moved to your tickle spot "Tickletickletickletickle~"

"OKAHAY OKAY!"

He giggled as he let you go, rubbing away the ghost tickles "You're too cute! Ah!" He smiled at you

"I cohohould say the same for you Mikey!"

"Stahap!" He hugged you again tightly

---------------------------------------------------

This was so cute to make I hope you all enjoyed! More requests are coming soon I've just been busy! But I promise they'll be out eventually!

I am so proud of you, You are enough, you are valid, you are loved, and have an amazing Day/Evening or Night my friends you truly deserve it! /p /gen /pos

-K <3

[flambo19]

hey! im back! 2.3 story thoughts!

but before that I got e1s1 firefly :3 might go for e2 depending on how i feel

Found Family Stellaron Hunters My Beloved

Jade, Topaz, and Oti: Discussing shares and money or whatever the fuck. Me: *eating popcorn and understanding maybe half of it*

Getting an outside perspective on the Trailblazer's shenanigans was a treat. TB is no longer silent and is a menace

Loved the Firefly sections (what a surprise) and it was nice to see more of her thought process and attitude. She desperately wants to fight against her predetermined end and live the life she wants. She deserves everything including all my jades

Also! The Stellaron Hunters (or most likely Elio with the rest by association) follow the Finality! Pretty sure everyone expected this but. Wild!

The group chat was fantastic. I will never get over Ratio going "k" and then leaving immediately (and of course still helping later)

I got spoiled on the buttons being fireworks so the tension for Firefly's "sacrifice" was not really there but the cutscene? Beautiful. Can't believe SAM princess carrying the Trailblazer is now canon

The new song is really nice as well. Idk how to explain it but the start with the piano reminds me of Beyond the Sky from Xenoblade 1 lol

SILVER WOLF HIRED SPARKLE TO KEEP FIREFLY OUT OF DANGER SHES A FUCKING SAP I LOVE FOUND FAMILY STELLARON HUNTERS

The final goodbyes and toasts got me emotional. All the Astral Express having things to say, March's little speech, and Pom-pom's crying. I love the Nameless so much

Also the final page of the Penacony guidebook reveals that the writer was Razalina. I'm glad she got something since she was the Nameless with the least going on in the story

I apparently missed an interesting scene with Acheron because I pressed the wrong dialogue option... It sounds like it was a HI3 reference so maybe it wouldn't have meant much to me anyway

So Jade broke out Sunday because of a deal with Robin. They drill it into you that Jade has some pretty harsh deals so what did Robin give up then? I've seen the theory that Robin gave up the memories of/connection with her brother and 🥺 terrified of being hit with even more sibling tragedy

One hole in this is that Robin on the Express mentions Sunday. I know that these aren't super canon or anything but it feels like a discrepancy worth noting (note: i am coping)

And Stellaron Hunter Sunday is a pretty popular theory at this point. Wonder how that's all gonna go down and if it will even happen like that in the end. The possibility that he will decide to continue with his ideals and not change despite being beaten in with the power of friendship (and a train)? I'm honestly interested in the idea, it feels like the opposite of what people would expect

Trailblazer: I can fix him. Elio (or Jade?): Well I can make him worse watch this

Overall it really felt like a fitting send off to Penacony that also set up a bunch of stuff that can show up in future quests (which is exactly what I thought would be the case)

[misc-obeyme]

Oh that would be so hard... like what the hell of course the answer to a question like that would be a Barbatos essay??? There's so much to say about him! Plus, don't they want you to be honest? Well, I dunno, maybe they don't lol. But if I was a teacher and my students answered questions like that with fictional characters, it would fill me with happiness.

it's a religious school too😭 the fact that I am still not excuted yet is hard to believe. but sometimes people get lucky🙇...... they're like: K-Kian are you.. QUEER?😦GAY?😱 Ssimp for a DEMON💀💀 in MY ISLAMIC�� School??? 😡👿👿

that didn't stop me though. you can't stop me, even god can't-

I'm finding the new birthday event to be very interesting. I'm not used to having to wait to read the story. Like maybe I could unlock the whole thing in a night, but the AP regeneration kinda requires you to do it a bit at a time. I don't hate it or anything, actually it's kinda nice. But I'm not sure how I feel about the story yet 'cause I haven't unlocked it all.

My advice is to not read it till last. skip it and read it when you've fully unlocked it.. I once made a mistake of reading a Barb's devilgram and while I could've gotten the card in the next three days. well, let's say I spent about 1000 dps to get him earlier. 💚💚💚 not regreting anything

You have a counter for Barb's bday? I love it! We still have some time, but it draws ever closer!! I'm always prepared to lose my mind over his cards lol. I'm excited to see what his birthday event is like!

I just hope it's not his usual artist I Simeon's artist to draw him pleaase😭😭😭 + we share the same BD so it helps me keep track of time because i tend to forget it. I want to treat myself this year after ignoring it for so long....... so I need to track the days lol.

It's a religious school?!!? I'm sorry, but that makes the whole thing even more entertaining lol.

OH of COURSE how did I not think to just skip the story parts and then read them all at once when it's fully unlocked?? That's how I do lessons. I always do all the battles first and then go back and read the story parts so I don't have to be interrupted!! LOL duh. I do events like that sometimes, too, but that just depends on how much time I have. Anyway for some reason that did not occur to me with this new format of thing, so thank you for the suggestion as I have now begun doing it that way! Still working on unlocking it all, but I think I'm gonna make it.

If Barb's card looks anything like Asmo's or Simeon's this year, you can say good bye to any and all resources I have saved up at that point. Not that I wouldn't spend them all to get a Barb bday card anyway, but I fear it'd be much worse.

YO you have the same birthday too?!?! Wow, that's a sign of fate right there~ it was meant to be~

I always use my birthday as an excuse to take the day off from work. I'll get myself something tasty to eat, too. Nothing fancy, but I think it's really important to do nice things for yourself sometimes. And since it's easy to forget, a birthday is a good reason to do it. So I hope you do treat yourself this year, you deserve it!

[tartrazeen]

In the top 10 heartbreaking moments of the show, we have absolutely got that part where - after Lugad shows up - Rohan's waffling on whether or not he can fight him, and when Angus says something like, "You're comparing Lugad to the family that raised you," Rohan's like ":( u don't understand, he's my brother" and runs away.

Literally the whole show is Rohan or Angus going on and on about how long they've known each other, actually using that to break the Enchantment Of The Week the one time Rohan gets all scared of everything, and throwing that in both of their faces during that episode where Angus gets framed and Rohan's accused of lying to cover for him 'cause "isn't it true you'd do anything to help him" (lmao no random village-lawyer man, it's the other way around 🙃).

But the whole show is also very, very careful about having them call each other their best friend exclusively. It's like a hard line drawn between that and between Rohan whining about wanting to know who his family is (also kinda throwing it in Angus' face in the episode where Rohan says, "I'd use a wish to find out my family is"), so - like... you'd think it wouldn't be such a surprise to anyone. They also fight all the time because "Punching someone in the face is an excellent way to break through spells 💖" and "Rohan wtf did you say to him now"

Buuuuut Rohan doesn't meet his family until the end of the show, so those two talking about 'best friends' basically means 'brother' until Lugad shows up and they finally have something to compare it to. And the second after that comparison's made, Rohan downgrades everybody else in his mind. Particularly Angus.

It just says a lot that Rohan's an orphan who was adopted by a druid (and by Angus first lmao #Rohan's Primary Caretaker) and never shuts up about wanting to know his real family, and Angus - who is ALSO AN ORPHAN but wasn't taken in by anyone who wasn't a guard dragging his ass off to jail - never mentions wanting to know his 'real' family even once.

... 'cause...

He's got one.

It's Rohan.

Obviously.

So right up until the point where Angus asks Rohan, "Dude, you know you've got us, right? Like we've been the people raising you this whole time. We're your family. Specifically me," it's like Angus was always fully confident in how Rohan saw him 'cause he just assumed it was mutual, especially when Rohan is all Angus has and we see him endlessly demonstrating it (to the point of Angus solo-taming a dragon mid-argument-where-Angus-was-absolutely-correct-to-be-pissed-at-Rohan to go rescue the guy and later being like, "Cathbad's magic wasn't enough to help Rohan in today's episode, so I'm gonna go yell at King Fin Varra WHICH IS ORDINARILY A BAD IDEA 'cause I'm not gonna let Rohan live cursed by whatever-the-fuck Maeve did to him this week")...

... and Rohan shatters that by effectively saying, "That's nice, dear. Hey so this guy who showed up five days ago, and that I found out was my half-brother two days ago? He now means more to me than you, who - and I cannot stop joining you in emphasizing this every episode - I have known for pretty much my entire life, even before I met Cathbad and was definitely relying on you to keep us alive 'cause I'm too hoighty-toighty to be a thief even if I was starving, and we 100% were starving back then because you still eat like someone who never had reliable access to food. actually who even are u lol ew go away"

I mean, in the show, Angus just switches to being like, "k cool i'm gonna go crash garrett's car into a tree for fun now," but Rohan said that to his *face*.

You think you know a guy and dedicate your life to keeping the idiot alive...

:/

(btw i love rohan. but i also even-more-love how perfectly thoughtless, inconsiderate and self-absorbed he gets and how thankless it is for angus to be so devoted anyway)

(also yes i know it's because the no-family thing hits rohan extra-hard and he's going through some shit and everyone's trying to prey on his emotions so he never really got to angus' level of "ya obviously we're family, screw everyone else", so it's not like i'm saying rohan is doing this on purpose lol. the poor guy has some viciously low self-esteem and he does seem like he feels terrible about this - but he always feels terrible about it and it's always directly at angus' expense until someone (usually angus himself) fixes rohan's problem, and then angus has to be like, "🫠 it's fine, that's just how rohan is, i'm gonna make out with deirdre for a while ok")

[fantasticcloudcreation]

I drank 4 beers and don't feel that drunk but I socialized with some coworkers, just ate a weed gummy and now I think I'm gonna lay in bed reading + catch up with the YouTube girls, will probably eat some snacks, L left with the guys back to Ohio and I miss him already but it's nice to have my own time to decompress now... Gotta figure out my plans going forward??? Who cares honestly I'm here it's fine nothing matters!!! I've definitely gained 10 pounds since I've been here which is hilarious but I'm leaving in the morning and I'll start over when I leave :) maybe I'm a lil drunk. Maybe I should eat some snacks rn before roomie gets back. Who cares nothing matters!!!!

I love my life I love my job I'm sad I was in a weird mood for this entire gig and I've been on the fence about coming back down for the Miami gig but honestly I just love my coworkers so I'll probably do it.

Maybe I'm a lil drunk but I'm thinking about how one of the guys in L's group is like, really cute, turns out L's partner had also briefly dated him but apparently he gets too drunk and people are tired of dealing with his shit etc you know guys like that lol but ummm he's cute with beautiful green eyes??? He was wearing a green beanie and I tried to be like, your hat perfectly matches your eyes, but he's been drinking all day and said something totally incoherent lmfao but uh unfortunately I seem to have a thing for silly people like that. Realistically I might never see him again anyway and also it would probably be awkward with the L + K dynamic already so I'm not pursuing anything here, just telling all y'all friends on the internet about it hahaha.

I told R I wanted to call him and he was like, we're leaving work now going back to the hotel, but then I ate a gummy and now I'm like gonna be too loopy to have an actual conversation oops 😬 talked to D on the phone last night which was really nice. I love that I have so many cute people in my life honestly.

Fucking cute guy T stole my wrench at work again today and it's the last day of the gig so I have to either socialize tonight and hope he shows up or like, maybe he'll be at the Miami gig, he was the same guy who was like "I held onto it so I'd have an excuse to talk to you" but I told him today if you lose it or steal it I'll be mad forever and he was like "haha that's fair" but guess who forgot to give it back at the end of the day! Another cute guy C also borrowed my other wrench and he was reminding me all day that he had it, made sure to give it back at the end of the day, super appreciated that haha. Maybe it's an excuse to hang out with T later but I've heard he's into weird drugs and I'm over that phase in my life so we'll see what happens!

Life is so fucking funny. KJ tried to invite me to an Airbnb for the couple weeks between this gig and the next but I'm gonna go back home to be with my family for thanksgiving and that'll be really nice. Gotta call my mom and then I'll probably start driving north tomorrow, I'm ready to go get some cold weather and family time.

This life is fucking weird. I love it so much. Maybe I'm actually drunk or maybe the edible is hitting or maybe both!!!! But I love my fucking life!!!!!! Every couple weeks is a whole new episode and a whole new chapter and I'm just floating along in and out of entirely new circumstances, there's no monotony, there's no consistency, it's an entirely new life every month or so. I'm gonna go back to my hometown and get in my winter depression phase like "nothing has changed" or maybe I'll actually get my shit together and start working on art projects. Who the fuck knows I gotta travel through time and space to get there and whatever unfolds will be whatever I need :)

Should I go back outside and hang out with the homies or should I start reading/watching videos or walk across the street to the gas station to get more cigs??? Actually I think it's snack time lol.

Anyway I gotta stop rambling on the internet and focus on grounding/relaxing bc this is my last night in this space and the next phase of my life starts tomorrow!!!!! God damn what a fucking journey this is!!!!!

Actually,,,,, maybe I should call M tonight???? Good idea or bad idea who knows but maybe that's the move ?????? Gotta call him soon, ive been thinking about him a lot recently, always happens anytime I'm in Florida. Maybe rn before I get too high and lose all ability to communicate lol maybe in a week when I get back to the hometown. Who knoooows !!!!!!!!

[blue-jisungs]

had to look twice when you said GRANDMA WHO CUT OFF A SPARROW'S TONGUE???????#+$-@ however, LEARNING ANOTHER LANGUAGE IS SO COOL OF YOUUUUU🫵🫵🫵 I haven't learned Korean, but I have consumed such an unhealthy amount of k-content that I can sometimes understand what they are saying (vaguely) without subtitles (it makes me very happy indeed) and I can also sometimes read basic words because one time, two years ago, I studied hangul on my own

FROMIS_9 (or rather fromis_8 😞😞😞) I DON'T STAN THEM, BUT THE GIRLS ARE SO SWEET OMG there's one who looks like a female version of sunoo from enhypen (I don't know her name I'm sorry 😔) and she looks like an ABSOLUTE SWEETHEART she's also the one who went viral for that one fromis_9 choreo mistake she's so endearing 🥹 pledis treats fromis_9 like shit though ☹️☹️ it's so terrible they aren't promoted at all idk why they do that to their ONLY GIRL GROUP?!?;" I've heard their song Love me Back, which is an Operation True Love OST. It's so cute and fun ☹️🤍

aaa I still have to watch this week's todo

I had a busy day yesterday, and today is also busy lol. Yesterday I edited this piece, which was part of my editor application for a magazine. I'm a prospective editor, so I'm hoping I get through!!🤞 I didn't go anywhere or do something fun tho 😞 my holidays are fast approaching the end (school starts on the 15th), so I want to go somewhere and have some fun before I have to lock in and become an academic weapon (victim)

Anywho, today I'm just going to follow my mundane routine, and go through the various, sad little tasks I do everyday 😔 WHAT ABOUT YOU THOUGH ML 🌷🌷

-🪿

BAUR like i feel like every nation has its weird tales?? like in poland there’s a tale abt dragon that was only eating virgins and who exploded bc it drank too much water :D i’ve been studying korean for a while now but im still shit at it LOL + well for around a year i’ve been learning chinese!! i love languages 🗣️ i really wanna learn thai or vietnamese next but maybe in the future 🤞

FROMIS GIRLS R LITERALLY THE SWEETEST!!! i think you mean jiheon? or chaeyoung? not sure tbh im still getting to know them but GOD LOVE ME BACK IS SUCH A GOOD SOMG??? they literally have only bangers??? i agree pledis treats them LIKE SHIT but then again, it also neglected jun’s solo plans or like the drama w tws staff. pleadis can literally go to hell😁😁😁

ALSO K GOPE U ENHOY UR LAST DAYS OF FREEDOM🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ rest well before school starts fr 🤞

today HM….. i’m gonna study bc i have a retake that im really stressed abt but im not… i can’t really study. like o don’t have motivation. but i need to start studying if i don’t wanna repeat the school year 😹😹😹😹 then i might write n do some stuff w zanna hehehehe BUT IM SENDING U POWER TO HO THEOUGH UR DAY🗣️

[grayroseposts]

another little venty vent cause fuck people

i hate myself. I actually hate myself. u hate my body. I hate my personality. I hate my brain. I want to go to my friends but they're always either doing great or terribly and I don't want to ruin their mood or make it worse with my issues. I actually wanna k!ll myself again, for the first time in 4 months. not my goofy constant imma kms like genuinely just need an inconvenience to shove me over the edge rn. I feel so stupid talking about what's going on in my head but sometimes this helps.does anyone else ever daydream about something terrible happening and think about what everyone's responses would be based off of your experiences with them, cause I do. and i realized mhow much people wouldn't care. I hope maybe one day they will care. I want to talk so bad to by bestfriend but she's literally getting proposed to tomorrow and I don't wanna ruin that. (btw they've only been together 4 months and I think it's a great idea eventually but not for two teenagers who haven't even made it passed the 1 year mark.) but nobody knows what to do if I cry lol, I have the emotional tendencies of a man. I honestly just want to break tf down and have someone there to comfort me and hold me but obviously I'm some unlovable ass who has never been in a good relationship. and honestly I'm gonna need my ex to stop pretending like I'm talking shit about her when ik she knows it's true. and istg if bro doesn't stop saying "you did look how that worked out" every time I say fuck you am going to bash my head against a brick wall because I FUCKING KNOW BRO you're literally the one who broke up with me even if it seems like we never actually dated and we never "broke up" dude I know please stop reminding me I wasn't as important to you as you were to me I know this shit by now. I'm mostly over it but some days she will not shut up about it and I wanna slap her cause I think she knows what she's doing to me at that point. I just want someone who will genuinely love me and actually take care of me. but anyways I've started counting calories and eating less and relapsing more again so that's fun. but if I tell the one person I can tell they'll only be like same. I try to ask her how she's genuinely doing but she always brushes me off and I don't know how to really express my feelings. she's not my therapist though so idrk why I want to tell her. probably because sometimes I only feel like I'm there to do things for them not just because I'm their friend. I kinda expected and I think even wanted her boyfriend to notice and say something to her but he doesn't have social skills so they can never see how i deflate when they talk about certain topics that strike a nerve. also idk why they say I'm not fat, we all know I am so why won't they just admit it. I do truly hate my body and they know so maybe that's why. I've tried so hard to look better but I just cant.

[ificouldhelpyouforget]

weirder asks for you to answer: 1, 21, 31, 33, and 42! I'm just about to start answering the asks you sent in last night!

I'm gonna do my best formatting on mobile since I'm at work lol

1. Who is/are your comfort character(s)? Oh man. I haven't thought about this in a long time because I have more of a comfort person (aside from my husband) and a comfort k-pop group. But I'll say Kurama from YYH, Spike from Cowboy Bebop, Aladdin and Genie from Aladdin, Caspian from Prince Caspian, Tadashi from Big Hero 6, Elmo from Sesame Street... and that's all I can think of currently. I'm sure there are a ton more.

21. Something you've kept since childhood? I have this stuffed Elmo I've had since I was really young. The pupils are almost rubbed off and his fur is no longer soft. Stuffing is mishaped and not even anymore, but I still have him!

31. What type of music keeps you grounded? The obsessive urge to say Stray Kids rn 😂 but Lofi is really the type I think. It just helps me focus and stay in the moment. It makes me feel comfortable. You know those pictures that look oddly familiar to you even though you've never been and you feel a lot of comfort you dont understand? That's what Lofi does to me.

33. The last adventure you've been on? Well, I went to Atlanta with a friend of mine to go to kpop stores and eat Korean food. I think that was probably the last adventure I went on. The last vacation adventure was to St. Louis in July. 🥹 It was so hot, but I got to show most of my in-laws where I grew up. Plus the zoo was so fun.

42. An app you use a lot besides this one (I know that isnt word for word but 🤷🏻‍♀️)? I use Instagram the most I think. I deleted Facebook and Twitter off my phone (I do check Twitter for pics often but I hate the way the app icon looks now). I am on Reddit quite a bit too, but it's mostly Tumblr and Reddit... oh and TikTok. I have timers on Instagram and TikTok though.

Thanks for sending these in! 🥰🥰🥰

[mxliv-oftheendless]

Let’s Fall in Love

Now I know what you’re all thinking: “But Livvie, you’re always so vocal about your opinion of Valentine’s Day and its inherent capitalism and societal pressure to be in a relationship and general stupidity! Why have you written a story for it?” Well, turns out when you have a soul, you can’t not get caught up in the romantic spirit somehow *shrugs*. This is by far the lamest, sappiest thing I have ever written in my entire life. It took me a while to finish writing because I did my French homework beforehand and my brain got fried (side note: learning a foreign language is exhausting). But I got it done, so yay me!

I’ve also written this because IT’S @cosmicrealmofkissteria ‘s BIRTHDAY! And since she wrote an epic story as a present for me, it’s only fair I do the same. Hope you enjoy, Shandi, and happy birthday!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The camera opens on Gene, who smiles and waves. “Hey there. If you’re watching this, this is the first video I’m making for my new flash drive, because I used up all the storage on my last one.”

From beyond the camera comes Paul’s voice calling, “Again!”

“Shut up, Paul. Anyway, you know the drill…”

“Who are you even talking to?” Paul’s voice comes again. Gene rolls his eyes and turns the camera around to Paul, who is sitting in a chair with his legs over the armrest and his laptop in his lap. “You keep saying you’re recording these for posterity, but… are you just talking to yourself and lying about it?”

“Shut up, Paul.”

“I’m just saying, man. I mean, I know why you do this. But from an outsider’s perspective, it’s kind of weird.”

“And from an outsider’s perspective, your obsession with stars is weird.”

Paul is silent for a moment, then nods. “Fair.”

He turns back to his laptop and Gene turns the camera back around. “Anyway, as I was saying. You know the drill. I’m Gene, I’m a co-owner of the awesome wine bar known as Cellar 82. I’m 33, and I am still single. But, oddly,” Gene shrugs, “I haven’t spent a lot of time thinking about how sucky that is. I guess FRIENDS was wrong about that.”

“FRIENDS was wrong about a lot of stuff,” Paul’s voice comes again. “They tried to make us think Ross wasn’t a total loser.”

Gene nods. “That is true. Anyway, yeah. Still single. I’ve been on some blind dates with people my friends keep telling me are “just perfect for me!” but… nothing’s worked out. And that’s fine.

“Let’s see, what else… Paul finally got me to watch a bootleg of Phantom of the Opera.”

“It’s amazing, right?”

Gene shrugs, but is smirking slightly “Eh. The book was better.”

“… I know you’re trolling me, but I’m prepared to fight you on that.”

Gene laughs. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Seriously though, it was pretty good. At least it explains why Paul keeps dramatically reenacting it in the shower.” He looks to the side and laughs. “Paul just gave me the bird.

“Anyway… that’s all I can think of to say right now. So that does it for this video. Bye for now!” He waves. The camera screen goes black. 

--

The camera opens on Gene, who is smiling. “So get this: I met someone last night. I probably sound like a teenage girl, but it’s pretty exciting. His name’s Vinnie, he’s got long hair down to about here,” he gestures to just below his shoulders, “and green eyes. But… and don’t tell Paul I said this… they’re really nice-looking green eyes. And it gets even better: he’s an Egyptologist. I never thought I’d meet one in real life. He’s in the graduate program at the university. He was at the wine bar with his friends because he apparently just got back from a research trip to Egypt and they dragged him out to celebrate. You’d never tell he was in Egypt, though; he’s kind of pale. But a pretty kind of pale.

“We got to talking because he heard the rock music playing and asked if it was Deep Purple. I didn’t even think he would know who they were, but he did. He knows a lot of rock bands. We could have talked about it more, but he went off to be with his friends.”

Gene rubs the back of his neck. “Is it weird that I kind of want to see him again? I’ll cop to it; he’s not the type I would normally go for. But I liked talking to him. He has a nice laugh, too. I told him he and his friends could come back anytime, and he said he thought it was a nice place so they might. I hope he comes back…”

--

The camera opens on Gene again, who is lying on his stomach looking sadly at the camera. “It’s been two weeks now, and Vinnie hasn’t come back. And I haven’t seen him around, either. In other news, another blind date. This one was set up by Eric with one of his fellow librarians. She was nice enough… but the date was really awkward. I don’t think it’s gonna go anywhere… as usual.”

Gene sighs and runs his hand through his hair. “I dunno what’s wrong with me, but I can’t stop thinking about him. Vinnie, I mean. Do you think he liked me? People say I’m kind of unapproachable… but he didn’t seem to mind, or have any problem talking to me. I just want to see him again, and maybe then I can finally work up the balls to ask him out.

“But then there’s… well, this, to think about. What if, if I ever see him again, it goes somewhere, and I show him I do this, and he gets weirded out by it? It’s not like what Paul said before is a lie—people who don’t know what this is to me think this is weird. But maybe… maybe I can cross that bridge when I get there—if I even get there at all. I haven’t even seen him again yet.

“Well… here’s hoping I see him again. Anyway, as for the rest of my life…” He shrugs. “Same old shit. Bar’s still getting good reviews… but it’s had good reviews since we opened, so that’s not new. No new episodes from Buzzfeed Unsolved yet. Rick and Morty… still a wild show. It’s gotten even wilder if possible. But I can make a separate video about that. And, uh… that’s pretty much it. So I guess I’ll sign off for the night. This is Gene Simmons, signing off.”

--

The camera opens on Gene, who looks giddy. “You’ll never guess what happened: scientists proved ghosts are real.

“No, I’m just kidding. I wish, but anyway… Vinnie came back! Turns out he and his friends do a tri-weekly Guys Night Out, and they’re really serious about it. They would even FaceTime Vinnie while he was in Egypt. They liked the wine bar so much they decided to come back for their next one.

“So I got to talk to Vinnie again—he remembered my name, can you believe that?—and like I said I would, I worked up the guts to ask him out. And he said yes! I’m gonna pick him up from his loft—he and his friends live together—and take him out to this coffee place down the block from the wine bar.” Gene holds up crossed fingers. “Here’s hoping it goes well.”

--

We see Gene, who is lying on his stomach and looking happily at the camera. “So I just got back from my date with Vinnie. I suppose you’re wondering how it went, huh? Well…” He slowly bows his head…

… then looks back up at the camera with a big smile. “It went really well! We talked about our favorite bands, and Vinnie’s job… you should’ve seen his face when he was talking about Egypt. He was so into it. Then he asked me how the wine bar got started, so I told him about how Paul and I decided to open it together. He thought it was really cool how we know so much about different wines.

“Actually, we were there for a pretty long time. I was hoping it would last an hour, at most. But as we’re getting up to leave, I look at my watch, and it’s been three hours! I’ve never had a date last that long, or one that seemed to go by that fast. We made plans to meet for dinner next week.” Gene checks his watch. “I should probably sign off for now. I told Tommy I’d take over his morning shift tomorrow.” He flashes the camera another smile. “Today’s been a good day. Can’t wait to see Vinnie again.”

--

Music is playing in the background. The camera has opened on Paul, who gives a smile and a peace sign. “Hey there, posterity. It’s me, ya boi. Check this out.”

He turns the camera around to reveal Gene moving around the kitchen area. Paul zooms the camera in on him. He looks to be in a very good mood as he pours cereal into a bowl, nodding his head along to the music. The camera turns back to Paul, who gives the camera a lost look and shrug. “He’s been like this all morning. He’s only had one cup of coffee so far. Oh, and you probably can’t hear it on the recording, but he’s humming. Actually humming along to the music. I’ve narrowed down the possibilities of what could’ve happened to him to two: either Trump’s been assassinated, or his date last night with Vinnie went really well. And since Trump’s unfortunately still alive and well, then that means it was his date with Vinnie. I just—” Paul stops and looks up. His eyes widen as a voice can be made out. “Oh my God…”

He turns the camera around and zooms in on Gene again. We can now hear Gene singing along to the music. “—fall in love/Our hearts are made of it/Let’s take a chance/Why be afraid of it…”

The camera turns back around to a shocked Paul. “He’s singing along now!” he whispers. “Oh my God… I’m so glad I decided to make a recording of this. This is a historic moment, people!”

“Paul, what are you doing?” Gene’s voice suddenly says, making Paul look up at him. “Is that Shannon? Paul, what are you doing with Shannon?”

“I’m documenting history, Gene. Also, I still say you could give your camera a better name than ‘Shannon’. Peter’s cats have better names than that.”

“Fuck you, Shannon’s a great name.”

“You could’ve named her Diane. Then at least more people would get the Twin Peaks reference.” Paul watches Gene for a moment, then sighs and turns back to the camera. “And he just flipped me off. Well, looks like the moment’s gone. But at least you got to see it for yourselves.” He glances up at Gene. “I should probably give Shannon back to him now before he tries to snatch it. So I guess bye for now, posterity!” He blows a kiss at the camera and turns it off.

--

Gene is sitting on his bed, leaning back against the headboard. He has a nervous look on his face. “Hey there. So, um… I did something kind of impulsive today, and… everything was fine, but…” he sighs and runs his hand over his face. “I don’t know. I guess I should give some background first.

“So as you probably know, I’ve been dating Vinnie for nearly three months now. Given how he’s a part-time research assistant and working his way through grad school, that probably isn’t that impressive. He keeps apologizing for having to decline going out together, but it’s fine, I get it. Tommy and Ace were like that when Ace was working on his astronomy PhD. So I get it. But the thing is… Vinnie actually works to make time for going out with me. Like, he’ll message me things like…” The camera shakes as Gene fumbles for his phone and opens it. “Like this: I can ask Lita if I can leave early on Thursday. It’ll be short notice, but she probably won’t mind. And I just…” Gene runs a hand through his hair. “No one I’ve ever had a long-term relationship with has ever done that for me before. They would always say things like, Oh, sorry, I can’t, I have Such-n-Such at seven. I remember my high school girlfriend said one time that she couldn’t go out because she had StuGo till five. And I said, ‘well, how about afterwards?’ And she got all snippy and said ‘no, cuz I have to do my homework when I get home.’ Actually she was also the one that dumped me for that blond fuck Vince… Anyway, point is, no girlfriend or boyfriend I’ve ever had has ever done that. It was either they could or they couldn’t. Except Vinnie…

“But I digress. Anyway, Vinnie and I’ve been dating for almost three months, and whenever I do see him…” Gene sighs and smiles a little. “It’s great. We haven’t just gone out to restaurants; we’ve gone to the movies, I went over to his and his friends’ loft once and he comes over here…” Gene smirks a bit. “I’m happy to report I still got it in the boudoir. His friends seem to like me, and Paul likes Vinnie. It’s been… pretty amazing. I really like him. He’s really smart, even if he knows next to nothing about horror movies, he’s got good music tastes, he’s funny, his laugh is… like music to my ears, and he’s incredibly attractive. Actually, he’s sort of insecure about how he looks—can you believe that? I don’t give a damn that he looks kind of feminine, he’s beautiful. And whenever I’m with him, I just think, how can someone this amazing exist? And want to spend his time with me? I just… fuck, am I digressing again? Sorry.

“Anyways, to get back to what I started this with… I told him about this. About Shannon and my video diaries. I didn’t tell him why, because… well, I kinda chickened out of that. He was curious about it—apparently, he’s never met someone who makes video diaries. So I told him about when I first got started making them, and went on from there. And the whole time he never looked put off or weirded out by it—he just looked really interested. And I guess that’s what made me say what I asked next: I asked if he wanted to be in one.”

Gene presses his mouth into a line. “Yeah… I didn’t realize what I said until after I said it. He just stared at me for a second, I think I took him by surprise. I was sure he was going to say no. But then… then he said sure, if I felt okay about him being in it. He’s coming over tomorrow.

“I definitely feel like I should be more excited than I actually am. This… well, you know how much this stuff means to me. I’ve never shared this with any of the other people I’ve dated. This is my own personal thing. But Vinnie… it just sort of slipped out. Does that mean something?”

Gene sighs and runs his hand through his hair again. “God, what am I doing… I’m psyching myself out again. It’s probably not going to be as bad as I’m worrying it’ll be. He didn’t seem to judge me when I was telling him about it, so he probably won’t judge me tomorrow. He’s not like that; he’s better than that.” Gene slowly smiles. “Yeah… Yeah, I think it’ll be fine. Paul’s gonna be home tomorrow too, and he gets it. Yeah, it’ll all be fine.

“Well, I guess I’ll sign off for now and go to bed. Stay tuned tomorrow for when you finally meet this Vinnie I’ve told you so much about.”

--

The camera opens on a black shirt, then rustles and is lifted up. Vinnie is sitting on the couch, looking at the camera. “Is this fine?” he asks.

“It’s perfect,” Gene replies from behind the camera.

“Okay… So, what should I do?”

“How about… your name, your age, your job, your favorite band, and one fun fact about yourself.”

Vinnie laughs. “Okay.” He smiles and waves at the camera. “Hi! I’m Vinnie, I’m 30, I’m an Egyptologist and work as a research assistant, my favorite band is…” he laughs nervously, “I don’t know, there are so many good ones…”

“You don’t have to say one if you can’t think of one,”

“Okay. I have a lot of favorite bands. And a fun fact about me is…”

“You’re short,”

Vinnie scoffs at Gene. “Well, we can’t all be over six feet tall. Here’s a fun fact about me: I like Star Trek more than Star Wars.”

“Take that back,”

Vinnie smirks at him. “Why don’t you make me?”

“You’re kidding, I know you’re kidding,”

Vinnie laughs. “Okay, okay, I’m kidding. A true fun fact about me is… I’ve seen every season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians.” The scene is quiet. He looks at Gene behind the camera. “I’m serious.”

“… You’re actually serious?” The camera zooms in on Vinnie’s face. “You need to explain. Now. Because I’m sorry, but if you’re a fan of the Kardashians I may have to question our relationships.”

Vinnie laughs. “Don’t worry, Genie, I’m not a fan of the Kardashians. Never in a million years.”

“Thank God. But you still have to explain.”

“Okay, fine. What happened was, Mark and I had a bet where the loser had to binge watch all the seasons of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, and I lost. I spent the next two and a half weeks watching every episode whenever I had free time, and they’re two and a half weeks of my life I’ll never get back.”

“How was it?”

“If you think watching their drama every week is bad enough, try watching all of their drama at once.”

Gene winces. “That sounds horrible,”

Vinnie nods. “Like I said, two and a half weeks of my life I’ll never get back.”

“Ugh, did I just hear Keeping Up With the Kardashians?” Paul’s disgusted-sounding voice comes from in the background. “I’m sorry, but if you’re gonna be talking about that crap, you’re gonna have to leave.”

“Shut up, Paul,” Gene replies. “He’s not a fan.”

“I had a bet with Mark and lost, and so had to binge watch the whole show,” Vinnie explains.

“And?”

“Absolutely hated it,”

Paul’s voice sounds satisfied. “Good. Gene, you better not lose this one; he’s a keeper.”

Vinnie laughs, while Gene’s voice is embarrassed. “Don’t you have a Phantom of the Opera number to reenact?”

“It’s fine,” Vinnie laughs. “I don’t mind.”

“You say that now, but after you spend some more time around him, that may change,”

Vinnie shrugs. “I doubt it; I do live with Mark and Dana, after all.” He gives Gene a cheeky smile. “Am I a keeper, Genie?”

“Welllll…” the camera zooms in on Vinnie’s face, while he tries not to laugh. Then it zooms back out again. “Yeah. You’re a keeper, alright.”

Vinnie smiles. “Thank you. So are you.” The camera feed is silent for a beat. “So… should I say goodbye, or…”

“Oh! Oh yeah, uh, yeah, you should.”

“Okay.” Vinnie grins at the camera and waves. “Well, it was nice to meet Shannon. She’s a very nice lady, very efficient. Once again, I’m Vinnie. Bye!”

--

The camera opens on Gene. He is lying on his stomach on his bed, and gazes sadly at the camera. “Hi. It’s Gene. And… my life’s been a mess the past few days. Vinnie and I… well, we’re not talking. We haven’t even texted, except for…” Gene’s eyes blink rapidly, “for just now. Um, I should probably start at the beginning, huh?

“So, Vinnie’s video diary was about a month ago. And since then we got… more serious. He was—been—fuck, I don’t fucking know grammar anymore, my life’s such a mess. He’s been coming over a lot more. We made dinner together once. We watched movies, and… all that. It was great. And after he seemed to be totally fine with me making video diaries, I started making more videos with him in it. And at first it was fine—he just laughed and went along with it. But after a while…” Gene sighs and runs a hand over his face. “Fuck, I didn’t even realize this until I thought back… After a while, he started getting… less fine with it. I think—no, he was definitely more annoyed than he let on. But I never noticed; I was just so happy that he didn’t think I was weird for doing it. I-I should’ve paid more attention…

“Um, anyway, that brings me to… to a few days ago. Vinnie came over to watch… what was it? It was… I don’t even remember. Not that it matters. He came over to watch a movie, and I… he looked so handsome and I couldn’t help myself and… and pulled out Shannon while he was making popcorn. When he saw Shannon, he sighed heavily, like a really frustrated sigh, and asked if I could turn it off. And that’s what got my attention: he’s always been careful to call Shannon “her”, and this time he called her “it.” So I was kind of caught off guard, so I turned her off and asked what was wrong. And… it took him a few seconds to answer, but… he really didn’t have to in the end. He was trying to give me an excuse other than the truth.

“He… He asked me why I’m always pulling Shannon out and making videos, even when I don’t have to. I told him it was for posterity, like I usually do. But that… that, um, wasn’t enough for him. He said I should try to spend time away from making video diaries for a while, and unplug. That’s the word he used: unplug. And…” he sighs heavily. “Does it even matter what I said to that? It doesn’t seem like it matters much now; the ending’s still the same. I got kind of put off by what he was saying, he got more annoyed at me, which got me more frustrated at him, and… well, one thing led to another, and… and eventually we were just shouting at each other. We were yelling back and forth, and—and throwing insults at each other… until finally he just stormed out.

“And… And that’s it. I haven’t talked to him since. Haven’t gone to try and see him when he’s working, haven’t called him… I only worked up the balls to text him an apology a few hours ago.” He laughs humorlessly. “Can you believe that? I apologized over text instead of in person… how pathetic is that? No wonder he took two hours to respond… I was sure he wouldn’t even respond at all, even though at the same time I was checking my phone every five minutes. Then when he did respond, all he said was…” Gene swallows roughly. “It just said, I don’t want to talk right now. That’s it. Nothing else.”

Gene sighs and runs his hand across his face and through his hair. “I can’t believe it. Four months of everything going amazing and I fucked it all up because I’m too emotionally attached to my camera. Fuck, I wonder what Dr. Aucoin would say if he could see me right now… this probably wasn’t what he was thinking of when he suggested I start making these. I took it too far… This is my fault. I can’t believe Vinnie didn’t get annoyed sooner. He’s too patient…” Gene gives a wet laugh. “Goddammit, Vinnie’s amazing. He’s a treasure. I don’t care about all the stuff about him I get bothered with. I don’t care that he’s such a perfectionist. He’s too good for me… He has been from the moment I met him. And now he might want to break up with me over this… and he would be totally justified in wanting that.

“Well, you heard it right here. Once again I manage to fuck up everything, only this time I managed to fuck up the best thing that’s ever happened to me in years… maybe my entire life. I, um, don’t know when the next time I make one of these will be. It might actually be never this time. So, if this really is my last video diary…” he shrugs sadly. “I’m sorry. I wish I could end things on a lighter note, but… guess I can’t. So…” he waves despondently at the camera. “Possibly for the last time ever… this is Gene Simmons, signing off.”

The screen goes black.

--

The camera opens on Vinnie, who is staring sadly at it. He looks like he’s been crying. “Hi, it’s… it’s Vinnie. Um… you probably know what’s been happening… and it’s my fault. I could never understand why Gene’s always making these video diaries, always documenting everything… but now I know. Paul gave me all the flash drives, all the videos he’s ever made, and I watched them all. I…” He sniffs and wipes his eyes. “I feel so horrible. This is all my fault. I… I had no idea. I’m so sorry… I-I wish I could tell him how sorry I am. But I’m… I’m scared. What if he doesn’t forgive me? If I were him, I wouldn’t forgive me. But I want him to forgive me. At the very least I want him to know how sorry I am, and how ashamed of myself I am. Gene is… he’s the most amazing person I’ve ever met. He’s sweet, he’s funny, and he makes me…” Vinnie is getting closer to tears now “he makes me so happy. I… I think I—”

“Vinnie?” Gene’s voice is suddenly heard from off-camera. Vinnie jumps and whirls his head around to the side. “What are you doing?”

“I-I… I…”

Vinnie quickly fumbles with the camera, and the screen goes black.

--

The camera screen shakes for a couple seconds, until it is raised and focused on Gene. He’s lying in bed on his side, shirtless, and smiles. He speaks quietly. “Hey there. So, turns out that wasn’t my last video after all. Which… thank God. I missed getting my thoughts out to a cold, unfeeling camera lens.” He smiles wider and chuckles. “Not that Shannon’s cold and unfeeling. She’s a good listener. Which reminds me…”

Gene sits up and fumbles with the camera. He turns it around and aims it at his bed. Lying in bed asleep, also shirtless, is Vinnie. His body is turned towards Gene’s side of the bed. Gene keeps the camera on him for a couple seconds, then turns it back around to himself, smiling. “Yep. We talked, we talked a lot actually, but we talked everything out, told each other we were sorry and then that we forgave each other, and then…” He trails off and grins. “Well, I’m sure you can connect the dots yourself.

“It’s actually kind of funny how it started. Apparently, Paul got tired of seeing me moping for the past week and a half, and decided to, without telling me, tell Vinnie why exactly I make my video diaries. So he got all my flash drives together—and I mean every single one—he even made a copy of the videos on my current flash drive—went over to Vinnie’s loft, and gave them to him, telling him to watch them all. And… And he did. He was over here at our place because he was returning the flash drives, and while he was in my room he saw Shannon. And that’s when I walked in on him talking to Shannon and looking like he was going to cry. He, uh, he actually did cry. And then… we talked. He said he was sorry for everything he said, and for not realizing what these mean to me, and I said I’m sorry for how much I was aiming Shannon at his face.” Gene shrugs sheepishly, smiling. “I mean, I still feel bad, but can you blame me? He’s got a pretty face.”

A hand suddenly passes up his chest to wrap around his shoulders and the top of Vinnie’s head appears. His smile widens and he looks down. “Good morning to you.” He leans down to kiss the top of Vinnie’s head.

“Morning…” Vinnie sits up to lean his head on Gene’s shoulder and rubs his eyes. “Mmm… I woke up and you were talking to yourself…” He sees the camera, and smiles. “Oh.” He rests his head on Gene’s shoulder. “Good morning, Shannon. And… what’s the word you used?”

“Posterity?”

“That’s it. Good morning, posterity.” He smirks a bit. “It’s me, ya boi.”

Gene groans and rolls his eyes. “You got that from Paul, didn’t you?”

“It’s what he uses whenever he makes an appearance… I know he does it to annoy you, but I thought it was kind of funny.”

Gene smiles a bit. “It’s less annoying coming from you… You have a way with words.”

Vinnie looks up at him and smiles. “Well, thank you.” He leans up to kiss Gene’s cheek. Gene turns his head and kisses him full on the lips.

When they pull away Gene speaks. “I just thought of something,”

Vinnie puts his head back on Gene’s shoulder. “Mmm hmm?”

“You apologized to me… but you never apologized to Shannon.”

“I…” Vinnie looks up at him blankly. “What?”

Gene nods his head at the camera. “Shannon. You never apologized to Shannon. You called her an it, Vinnie. She’s had a pretty hard time coming back from that, especially after how you were so nice to her before.”

Vinnie glances at the camera. He’s smiling slightly, but there’s also some guilt on his face. “I did do that…”

“Yeah. Plus you didn’t even thank her for letting you record yourself yesterday.” Gene says all of this in a very serious voice. “So? Does she not deserve an apology?”

“Yes, she does.” Vinnie turns to look apologetically at the camera. “I’m sorry I called you an it, Shannon. I was annoyed at how much I saw you; that was rude and wrong of me. And thank you for letting me record myself yesterday.” He looks up at Gene. “Does she accept my apology?”

Gene leans in off to the side to look at the camera, then leans back smiling. “She forgives you,”

Vinnie smiles happily. “Thank you, Shannon. You’re a special lady. Also,” his smile turns suggestive as he glances up at Gene, “I had no idea your user was that good. Last night was fucking amazing.”

Gene’s smile widens. “I should be surprised at hearing you swear… but I heard enough of that last night.”

Laughing, Vinnie waggles his eyebrows at the camera. “What can I say? I forgot my manners.”

“Also, I’m not sure if I ever mentioned this before, but Vinnie has an ankh tattoo.”

“Mmm hmm,” Vinnie nods proudly. “I got it in Alexandria. It’s about as big as my hand, and it’s black, but I regret nothing.”

“Wanna show them where it is?”

Vinnie laughs. “No thanks.” He winks at the camera. “Sorry, but only Gene will ever know that.” He sits up a bit and smiles suggestively at Gene. “Want to see it again?”

Gene grins back. “I’d love to. Just gimme a sec.” He fumbles with the camera and turns it off.

--

When the camera is turned on, with Paul holding it, we see the interior of Cellar 82. It is crowded with people, and voices and music fill the background. “Hey, posterity,” Paul says, raising his voice so he can be heard. “It’s me, ya boi. I’m borrowing Shannon, but Gene probably won’t mind.” He turns the camera away from him and moves it to pan around the room. “So as you can see, we’ve got a full house here in Cellar 82 tonight. Why, you ask? Well…”

He moves the camera and zooms it in on Tommy and Ace, who are dancing together in the middle of a makeshift dance floor. He zooms out and turns the camera back to himself. “Ace finally proposed to Tommy. They took things seriously slow while he was working on his PhD, moved in together after he got it, and to celebrate being ten years sober, Ace finally decided to pop the question. About fuckin’ time, if you ask me.

“But while Ace and Tommy are great together, they’re not why I’m borrowing Shannon.” Paul grins wickedly at the camera. “Gimme a few seconds, and I’ll show you the real reason why.”

He turns the camera away from him and starts to move through the crowd of people. Eventually he comes to a corner that is a bit more private, and zooms in on the people sitting at the table. It is Gene and Vinnie; Vinnie is in Gene’s lap and they’re in the middle of making out. The camera turns back around to a smirking Paul. “Yep, that’s why. Gene sometimes forgets personal space is a thing when he’s had enough to drink, and you didn’t hear it from me but apparently Vinnie gets a little loose when he’s had enough wine. And when you put ‘em together… you get this.” He turns the camera back to the couple, who are still making out. “Hey, lovebirds!”

At his shout, Gene’s eyes turn in his direction, then widen. He turns his head fully around. “Paul, what the hell are you doing?” he shouts. Meanwhile Vinnie looks up, sees the camera, and hides his face in Gene’s shoulder.

“Smile, you’ve been recorded for posterity!” Paul replies gaily.

Gene gently pushes Vinnie, who nods and gets off his lap. As soon as he is off, Gene bolts to his feet and starts to advance on Paul. “I’m gonna kill you, Paul!”

“But Gene, I’ve got Shannon! You wouldn’t hurt our lovely gal Shannon, would you?”

“Shannon? Never. You? You better fucking run.”

The camera shakes violently as Paul turns and runs, laughing.

--

Gene is sitting at the kitchen table, wearing a red button-up shirt and a black blazer. “Hi. I’m about to head out to go pick up Vinnie and take him out to dinner. We’ve officially been together for one year… which I know because I have the day marked in my calendar. So I decided to take him out to a nice place. He doesn’t even know what’s going to happen; all I told him was to dress nice.”

Gene runs his hand over his hair. “I’m also planning on doing something else today. I’ve thought about it for a long time now, I think ever since we made up after that argument we had… and I’m pretty sure of it now. I’m in love with Vinnie. And after we come back here from dinner, I’m going to tell him.

“Y’know what’s funny? When I first thought that I might be in love… I would’ve been less scared if Jason Vorhees burst through my window. Because I’ve never been in love before. I love Paul, but not like that—never in a thousand years like that. And for all my other past relationships, I thought in the moment it was love, but then when it was over I realized it was just a really strong attraction. But this… I’ve thought about it for months, and I know it’s actually love.

“I’m gonna tell him tonight. Despite worrying that he doesn’t love me back, I’m still gonna do it. I just wanted to get my thoughts out before I left. Which,” Gene glances up at the clock, “I should probably leave now.” He smiles hopefully and holds up crossed fingers. “Wish me luck!”

--

The camera is aimed at the bed, then shakes as it is lifted up and turned around to reveal Vinnie. He smiles. “Hi,” he says quietly. “I woke up first and decided to borrow Shannon for a second. I’ll be quick; I just wanted to say something. But first…”

He turns the camera around and aims it at Gene, who is lying in bed on his side, still asleep. “I could get used to waking up to this,” Vinnie’s voice is soft and affectionate. He turns the camera back around. “I’m sure Genie’s already said something about it, but last night marked us being boyfriends for a year. Gene took me out to a nice dinner, then we came back here. And then…” Vinnie turns from the camera to look down at Gene, then smiles and turns back. “Gene said he loved me.” He laughs. “I still can’t believe it. He’s really in love with me.

“I didn’t say it then, because… well, I wasn’t sure enough of myself to feel confident enough to say it. But I am now. I love him too. And I’m going to tell him right now.”

And with that, he turns off the camera.

--

When the camera turns on, Gene’s shirt is the only thing in frame. He adjusts something, then moves backward to sit next to Vinnie. They are surrounded by stacks of boxes. Gene smiles and waves, while Vinnie follows suit. “If you’re watching this, this is the first video being recorded in our new apartment.”

Vinnie grins happily. “We moved in together!”

“We’ve been together for two years now, almost three, and we decided we were tired of not seeing more of each other.” Gene grins at the camera. “So, now we’ll be seeing each other all the time.” He turns to Vinnie. “Seriously though, I should probably take the time to apologize in advance.”

“For what?”

“Y’know… anything I do that bothers you or makes you uncomfortable. Paul told me one time that I snore.”

“Well, I’ve slept right next to you hundreds of times, and you’ve never snored.”

“You’re kind of a deep sleeper, though,”

“I guess that’s fair,”

“But anyway… sorry in advance.”

Vinnie smiles and shakes his head at him. “Okay. I forgive you in advance. I guess I should say sorry in advance for anything I do that bothers you.”

Gene smiles back. “I forgive you in advance.” He kisses Vinnie. The kiss slowly becomes deeper, until Vinnie falls back onto the floor with Gene on top of him.

“Mmph… Gene, the camera.”

“Right.” Gene gets up and moves to turn it off.

--

The camera turns on, and we see the interior of Cellar 82. The camera is pointed at Gene and Vinnie, who are sitting at a table.

“I’m sorry, I know I probably shouldn’t talk,” Paul’s quiet voice comes from behind the camera, “but I’m too excited! Today marks Gene and Vinnie being together for four years, and tonight’s the night Gene decided to do something very special.”

After a few moments, Paul gasps and zooms in on Gene’s hand as it reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a small black box. Gene seems to grip it tightly for a second. The camera zooms out to have both men in frame as Gene speaks. The words are inaudible on the recording. Then Gene opens the box, places it on the table, and pushes it towards Vinnie.

Vinnie’s mouth drops open and he covers his mouth. Then he slowly nods his head. He lowers his hands to reveal a blooming smile, and his reply of “Yes!” can be faintly heard. Gene stands and goes around to Vinnie’s chair, picks up the box to take out the ring, and slides it onto Vinnie’s finger. Vinnie jumps up and they kiss passionately.

--

The camera opens on a wall of a bedroom, then is turned around to be on Gene. He grins at the camera and speaks in a quiet voice. “If you’re watching this, you’ve found the one video of my honeymoon I’m doing. The next two weeks are going to be completely radio silence. And to be honest? I’ve never been more excited.”

The camera is turned around to the bed, and zooms in on a sleeping Vinnie. “There he is—the one I’m gonna spend my life with, and the one who somehow wants to spend his life with me.” The camera zooms out and turns back to Gene. “Is it normal when you’re married to still wonder how the hell your partner puts up with you?” He shrugs. “Guess I’ll find out.” The camera turns back to Vinnie and zooms in on him. “Look at him; beautiful. He was the first one to fall asleep after last night.” His voice turns proud. “Not to brag, but I kind of outdid myself last night. I’m kind of surprised no one heard him.”

As he speaks, Vinnie shifts in bed and slowly opens his eyes. He lifts a hand and rubs them, then turns to blink blearily at the camera. “Mm, Gene… what are you doing?”

“Showing the world my beautiful husband,”

“I thought you said you weren’t going to bring Shannon along,”

“Don’t worry, this is the only video I’m taking,”

“Mmm… okay.” Vinnie rubs his eyes and props himself up.

The camera zooms in closer. “Vinniiiiiie…”

Vinnie looks at the camera, smiling amusedly. “Yes, Gene?”

“Got anything you wanna say to Shannon?”

“Shannon, you’re a lovely woman, but Gene’s legally mine now. If you could stop trying to steal him from me, that would be great.”

“Very funny. I meant something like saying hi. For posterity.”

“Okay, okay,” Vinnie smiles at the camera and waves. “Hello, it’s me, Vinnie. As of two days ago, I got married to the beautiful man behind the camera…” Vinnie laughs. “Who is now blushing.”

“Shut up,”

Vinnie laughs. “Well, assuming Gene keeps his promise, this is the only video being taken during our honeymoon, so… enjoy it.”

“Well said,”

“Thank you,”

“How’s the bed?”

Vinnie shifts. “Mm… comfy. Really comfy.”

“It is pretty comfy,”

Vinnie grins at Gene beyond the camera. “It’d be perfect if a certain someone would put Shannon away and come back to bed.” He bats his eyelashes. “Please?”

Gene sounds like he’s grinning. “Well, since you asked so nicely…”

The screen goes black.