#just not their heels big yikes

[tokkiwrites]

summary: joel witnesses yet another fight between you and your dad, and frankly, he's tired of the way you've been talking to your old man. so he decides to teach you a lesson.

tags: pwp, dbf!joel, daddy kink, brat taming, spanking, age gap, p in v (unprotected yikes!), degradation, pet names, dirty talk galore!, creampie, head (f receiving), a short fight scene, family problems kind of, mean joel kind of.

/ᐠ - ˕ -マ⁩ authors note 𑁯 ✿ happy spookytokki kinktober!! the third and most anticipated one i think!! dbf joel wowza! 3.46k words of just pure smut >:) hope u likey! if u see any errors..no u dont.

“You’ve always gotta push every button, don’t you?” he snapped, his words flaring like sparks off dry wood. the kitchen boomed with both your voices. “Can’t you just do what’s best for once?”

You felt your pulse quicken, anger twisting up inside you like a coiled spring. “What’s best?” you spat back, incredulous. “You mean what you think is best, don’t you? God, Dad, you can’t keep treating me like I’m some clueless kid who needs his hand held!”

His face flushed a deep red, brows pulling tight together. “If you didn’t act like a kid, I wouldn’t have to! You wanna run off and live some big-shot life, fine. But don’t you dare act like I’m the one in the wrong for worryin’ about you.”

Before you could bite out a response, the sound of a chair creaking interrupted you. Joel shifted where he sat in the living room, the leather of the old armchair groaning under his weight. He hadn’t said a word since the argument began, just sat there with his arms crossed and a distant look on his face. Now, though, he glanced over, his gaze lingering on you for a moment before sliding back to your father.

“Maybe…” Joel’s voice was low, that drawl he had stretching the word out slow and easy. “Maybe you both wanna step back a bit. Cool down some.”

Your father exhaled, frustration radiating off him in waves, but he gave a terse nod, like he knew there wasn’t any use arguing anymore. “Yeah,” he muttered. “Probably for the best.”

He threw one last look your way—one full of hurt and something else, something that looked a lot like regret—before turning sharply and stalking out of the kitchen. The front door opened and then slammed shut behind him, the sound reverberating through the house.

You stood there for a moment, the silence thick and oppressive. Then, with a growl of frustration, you spun on your heel and stormed down the hallway to your room. The door banged shut with a sharp thud, and you collapsed onto the edge of your bed, breath coming in quick, angry bursts. You hated that he could still get under your skin like that, twist everything you said, and make you feel small, childish.

Minutes ticked by, your thoughts a jumbled mess of resentment and guilt, when you heard a soft knock on your door. It was barely more than a tap, but it sent a jolt through you. You sat up straighter, glaring at the door.

“Come in,” you said, voice flat.

The door creaked open, and Joel stepped inside, the light from the hallway casting his shadow long across the floor. He closed the door behind him, leaning back against it with his arms crossed over his chest.

“He’s gone,” he said quietly, his accent thickening his words. “Gone off to cool his head, like he always does.”

You just huffed, crossing your arms. “Good. Let him stew all he wants.”

Joel’s gaze flickered, his expression as unreadable as ever. “You know, you sure got a smart mouth on you,” he drawled slowly, each word rolling off his tongue like honeyed molasses. “Always did. But there’s a fine line between standin’ up for yourself and bein’ plain disrespectful.”

You stared at him, taken aback. “Disrespectful?” The word tasted bitter on your tongue. “He’s the one who—”

“—who’s worried ’bout his little girl.” Joel’s voice was steady but firm, cutting through your protest. He took a step forward, his gaze never leaving yours. “Look, darlin’, I know you’re frustrated. And I know he ain’t the easiest man to deal with. But the way you talked to him back there? That’s somethin’ you oughta be ashamed of.”

Heat flared up your neck, your pulse pounding. “I’m not ashamed. He never listens to me, Joel! No matter what I say, it’s like—”

“Don’t matter if he’s listenin’ or not,” Joel interrupted softly, shaking his head. “There’s a right way to talk to your folks, and that wasn’t it.”

You swallowed hard, struggling to hold his gaze. “So, what, you’re on his side now?”

Joel sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, his brow furrowed like he was tired of this whole conversation. “Ain’t nobody pickin’ sides here. But I’ll tell you this—you sounded like a brat, plain and simple.”

You sucked in a sharp breath, your heart lurching. “A brat?”

“Yeah,” he drawled, the word drawn out and almost lazy. He took another step closer, his gaze sharpening. “Actin’ like you know it all, like you’re too good to hear what he’s got to say. I get it—you’re grown, got your own ideas. But a little respect don’t hurt none.”

Something about the way he was looking at you—like he could see right through the front you were putting up—sent a strange thrill skittering down your spine. You shifted on the bed, your breath catching as he moved even closer, the distance between you shrinking to just a few feet.

“I don’t need a lecture from you,” you murmured, the words lacking their usual bite.

“Maybe not,” Joel agreed softly, his voice dropping to a near whisper. “But I reckon you need someone to remind you how to mind your manners.”

Your heart pounded hard against your ribs, the room suddenly feeling too small, too hot. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

Joel’s lips curved into the faintest hint of a smirk, his eyes dark and unreadable. “Means you’re actin’ like a spoiled little girl who needs to be put in her place. Someone’s gotta teach you how to behave.” You swallowed, pulse racing as you held his gaze, the challenge hanging thick. “And you think you’re the one to do that?”

“Maybe,” he murmured, voice rough. “Guess we’ll just have to see, won’t we?” There was something dangerous in the way he said it—something that sent your heart and head into a frenzy. You knew you were treading into territory you shouldn’t, but the pull was quietly simmering beneath the surface.

It was hard to ignore how close he was now, standing just a few steps away, his broad frame taking up so much space in the room. You tried to look away to push down the tension that was building, but your body betrayed you. You wanted to deny it, the way your pulse quickened when he spoke to you like that. The way his presence—strong and steady—always made you feel something you weren’t sure how to handle.

“I don’t need you telling me how to behave, Joel,” you muttered, but your voice lacked its usual edge. His lips quirked up, his eyes dark as they held yours. “someone’s gotta.”

Joel was always calm, always collected, but there was something in his voice that you couldn’t shake off, and it only made the knot in your stomach tighten. He took another step toward you, and you could feel the air shift. “You’ve always had a way of pushin’ boundaries, darlin’,” he drawled, his voice tickling you, “but there’s a fine line between speakin’ your mind and actin’ out.”

You bit your lip, unsure if you wanted to push him away or let this go further. You’d always had a thing for him—Joel wasn’t just any man. He was the kind of guy who was steady when everything else wasn’t. Rugged, manly in a way that most men your age couldn’t pull off, and there was something about him that made you feel both safe and completely off-balance at the same time. It was a crush you’d tried to bury, but moments like this made it impossible to forget about it.

Your heart raced in your chest, a wild rhythm that matched the storm of thoughts swirling in your mind. Joel had always been a figure of strength, a constant, rugged presence in your life. you’d always admired him from far, always found yourself drawn to him, even when you tried to deny it. That unspoken crush, the way your gaze lingered on him longer than it should, the way your stomach twisted when he called you "darlin’." It had been easy to brush off before to keep it hidden in the safe corners of your mind. But now, those feelings were too close, too raw, spilling over into the silence between.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” you mumbled, but even to your own ears, it sounded weak. Joel’s eyes flickered with something unreadable, and before you could pull yourself together, he stepped closer. Close enough now that you could feel the warmth of him, his presence filling the space around you until it felt like you could barely breathe. his smell was suffocating, making your lungs burn.

“I think I know exactly what I’m talkin’ about,” he said, "You do too. And since your daddy didn't teach it to you, it seems like i need to take the brat out of you." His gaze didn’t waver, his words deliberate, each one sinking into your heart like they were meant to. Your breath got stuck as his words settled over you, thick and heavy like a weight you weren’t quite ready for. The air in the room wrapped around your throat like a chain.

His eyes bore into yours, and you couldn’t look away even if you wanted to. His presence seemed to swallow everything else—the fight with your dad, the anger simmering in your chest, the stubbornness you wore like armor. Now, it all felt fragile, like glass under pressure. And Joel, standing so close, felt like the force about to shatter it.

A shiver rippled down your back, and you felt disarmed. Your body betrayed you—heat rising in your cheeks, your heartbeat so fast and loud you were sure he could hear it too. You wanted to protest, to say something sharp and cutting, to remind him he wasn’t your father and didn’t get to tell you what to do. But the words got stuck.

There was something in the way he looked at you now—unflinching, steady, like he had all the time in the world to watch you break. You’d never felt so vulnerable, so completely exposed. And yet, beneath that vulnerability, a dangerous thrill settled through you, a pull you couldn’t quite explain. It was wrong, wasn’t it? To feel this way, to let his words, his presence, affect you like this.

But you did let it affect you.

Joel scanned your face as if he was waiting for something—for you to break, to push back, or to surrender. You felt exposed under his gaze

And God, the way he stood there—so solid, so sure of himself. You had never felt smaller, more out of control, and at the same time, more drawn to that feeling of submission. It was like standing on the edge of a cliff, looking down into the abyss, knowing you shouldn’t jump but feeling the undeniable urge to fall anyway. fall into him.

"So here's how this is gonna go. While your dad is out to cool off 'm gonna teach you some manners, and when he comes back, you'll be good and ready to apologize." His calloused fingertips trace the side of your face. "How's that sound, angel baby?" You wanted to reply, to say something. this all felt like a dream, granted, a dream you didn't want to wake up from.

"Stayin' quiet now won't save your pretty ass, girl." Joel tuts, fingers slowly tangling themselves around your locks, pulling at them to make you look up. it made it hard to think straight. " I'm sorry.." And he chuckles at your words. "Now that's somethin'...so you can apologize." he said, almost mocking you. truthfully, him talking to you this way made all of your thoughts fuzzy, so you were basically on autopilot. the ends of your brows tie in a frown, unable to say anything more.

"Get up." Joel taps the side of your shoulder, his stern tone deafening the ring in your ears. "W-why?" You stammered. he rolls his eyes and tugs lightly on the blouse you had on. "Cause I'm 'bout to teach you a lesson. So you learn that being a brat has consequences. I ain't as soft as your dad."

Slowly, you shifted, pushing yourself off the bed, your legs shaky beneath you. Your heart pounded in your chest as you stood in front of him. As soon as you were upright, Joel’s hand released you, settling himself down on the edge of your bed, the place where you'd just been sitting, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. The bed dipped under his weight, his broad shoulders taking up more space than they should, and your eyes couldn’t help but linger on him for a second longer than you intended.

"Bend over." You swallowed hard, eyes widening. "Excuse me?" You could believe what he just saidㅡ" Surely you were dreaming. It's like he crawled into the deepest space of your brain and digged in there to find the exact ways to make you fold. "C'mon, i ain't got all day. And your dad is probably coming back soon. So bend over." Joel said whilst patting his thick thighs, signaling you to settle on them. Every part of you was attuned to him—his voice, his movements, the way he looked at you - so you obey.

with shaky movements, you bend over his legs, your behind perked up and back arched. you feel his palm on the small of your back, spreading warmth through your body, before he fully moves it down to pull on the hem of your pants. "Can I take these off, sweetheart?" Your heart trembles, eyes closing as you mutter a soft 'yes'. Joel drags your pants down to your folded knees, along with your underwear, the sudden cold feeling enveloping your skin. "Look so pretty like this, baby." joel leans in, trailing soft kisses down the curve of your spine all the way to your lower back. your body jolts as you try to remain quiet.

with no warning, he pulls his hand back and settles in with a hard smack on your sizzling skin. the harsh hit priks at your skin as it reddens, and you can't help but let out a soft yelp. "Count for daddy." and it takes you off guard, but you comply.

"o-one." joel hum, rubbing that spot before delivering another slap. "Two -" three slaps, then four, then five more, and you turn into a teary, weeping mess. how beautifully you splayed yourself onto the man's lap, each jolt of your body inviting him further in. for him, it was over in seconds, but for you, it felt like an eternity before you heard his voice again.

"Up. And bend over." in no time, you're bent over the edge of the bed, ass up and face flush with the mattress. the cold air hits your exposed cunt and your skin still hurts where he spanked you. He grips your hips, nails digging into your soft flesh, and you can feel his hardon resting between your legs. "This pussy is crying for me, huh?" he's cocky with the way he says it, two of his fingers gathering up the glistening liquid from your puffy lips, then bringing them to your mouth. "Be a doll." he's playing with you, but you? you do as you're told because he has you so drunk on him, in a way you've never felt before. you lick around his digits, tasting yourself and he delivers a proud slap to one of your asscheeks. "You pretty brat." back behind you, he crouches on one knee before drawing a long strip from your sensitive clit to your entrance with his tongue, the same two fingers you had licked, now slipping inside of you.

your back arches as a wave of pleasure breaks over your body like water on a shore. his licks are now concentrated on your bud, fingers quickening their pace as Joel hums at your sweet taste. You moan and writhe, that familiar warm feeling building up inside of you again. but as soon as you were there, he stopped, pulling back to see the shaky, wet mess you were. "P-lease, daddyㅡ"

he tuts, slapping your plush thighs. "You take what I give you. don't get greedy. You're lucky if I'm gonna let you come at all right now. this is supposed to be a lesson." the pain of that sick pleasure envelopes you and you sit with your cunt exposed as you hear Joel fumble the pockets of the pants he had already taken off. 'condoms' he mumbled, as if he knew what you were thinking.

"I'm clean.." You manage a whisper. "And on birth control." he sighs in relief. "Good." You can feel he is less tense now, his presence still behind you. with no warning, he flips you over, back on the bed and ass on the edge of it, that had your legs settle around his hips with ease. "Spread 'em." So you do. you spread your legs as much as you can, giving him a full view. Joel smiles, thumb back to rubbing circles onto your clit. "You're so beautiful." it was so sincere, so sweet you could almost taste it.

his gentle gaze soon got replaced by the hungry one he had all this night whilst staring you down. Finally, he aligns the tip of his shaft with your entrance and slowly pushes the tip in. Your breath got stuck into your throat, from the feeling laden with thornsㅡ Every prick of discomfort is countered by an unexpected surge of delight. Your tears fall down onto the mattress under you, little moans gripping your throat as he slips inside further. "You're okay, baby, you're okay. C'monㅡ" he assures you, asking you to surrender. "Take it all- theere we go.." Joel praises, lifting your hips a bit to get a better angle. He moves gently, each stroke hitting deeper within your core, the pain soon converging with ecstasy right as he alerts his movements.

you wrap your legs around him loosely but he takes you by your ankles and almost folds them over your stomach, providing him a better position to pound straight into you, hitting that sweet spot on and on. his hips dive down, one of his palms snaking up and wrapping itself tightly around your throat. your head was spinning, heart pounding, as his whole weight dominated over you. "That's it, baby, knew you could take it. Now you gotta apologize for being a little brat." his thrusts are rough, each hit making your body bounce, the urgency as he hit that very spot each timeㅡ your whole insides burning, too cock drunk to talk or respond, other than some pathetic whines that perfectly accompanied the wet sounds your pussy made wrapped around Joel.

"C'mon baby, say it, say what i wanna hearㅡ fuck." he hammered deep into you, the trinkets from your bedside table clinking soft melodies, as Joel held you by your hips. "I'm s-orry, daddy! I'm so sorryㅡ" you sob, trying your best to be coherent. "That's it, good girl, good fucking girl."

Feeling you tightening, the hand that was around your throat slips down to your clit, while the other makes you spread your legs wide again for easier access, giving you a chance to take in a big gasp of air. "want me to breed this pussy, huh? fill you up with my babies? maybe then youll learn to behaveㅡ shit!" the room spins around you, body floating as if ready to plummet back down, you try your best to reply. "yes, yes- please, please, daddy, I'm sorryㅡ"

"Dirty fuckin' girl. Go ahead, 'f daddy." the man succeeded to say, between his breathy groans. "Thank you, thank you, oh god, thank you so much daddy!" you say as if praying to him whilst he keeps fucking into you. he pounds into you as you come down from your high, your body almost too limp to register your surroundings. he slap your thigh, strong grips now onto your breasts as he comes ropes inside of you, then he pulls his length out of your pulsing walls, some come landing on your stomach.

and for a moment there was silence. this really just happened. joel pulls out and watches intently as his seed drips out of you, your body beautifully splayed out right under him. You squeeze around nothing, licking your lips, as you feel the warm trickles of come dripping from your stomach to your chest due to your position. you're both quiet for a bit, catching your breaths, as he scoots you better on the bed. "shit, babyㅡ look at that. so pretty." he smiles kissing your shoulders, "so pretty like this, f' me."

"I'm sorry for being a brat.."

" 's fine, baby. if you're too good i won't have any reason to punish you anymore. You wouldn't want that, would you?"

you wouldn't, indeed.

[pascals-doll]

GATÚBELA

ellie williams x reader

『••✎••』 in which you go to a party to forget about your cheating ex, who would’ve thought you’d find yourself falling in love at some reggaeton function. | WC: 9.3K

🫧 THIS IS A SERIES | FOR ALL PARTS GO HERE

🫧 SERIES MASTERLIST | CH.2 HERE

🫧 with all the talk in the fandom of inclusivity and needing a plot, my ass was busy whippin up exactly that! 💋 i hope you babies enjoy genuinely since this is my first series!

🫧 karol g and baby miko is 2846% of my playlist tbh

🫧 description: MODERN AU! FUNCTION BEHAVIOR, SUGGESTIVE CONTENT ONLY! latina!reader, detailed description of reader having tan/tawny brown skin!, bff!dina, mentions of drinking and smoking, mentions of toxic relationship, mentions of reader being cheated on, READER IS NOT IDENTIFIED WITH HER SEXUALITY (SHE HIGHKEY KNOW SHE GAY THO SHE NOT DUMB), mentions twerking/yiking (lol when i said function behavior i meant it)!, cocky masculine!ellie, mention of y/n once (___), use of nick name (mama), kissing!

CHAPTER ONE

“fuck him girl, what you need is a good drink and a good dance”

your dearest bestfriend Dina says, passing you the ‘Dutch’ you rolled.

the ‘him’ in question was your now ex-boyfriend. you had walked into his home 2 nights ago.

at first, you found him on his bed, he already seemed startled to begin with which was a dead-giveaway already then the girl walking out of his restroom in your towel was enough to have you walking through that front door.

you couldn’t lie and say getting cheated on didn’t hurt. it just didn’t hurt in the way you thought it would. if anything, you had felt an undertone of overwhelming relief even with that pang of pain.

“so are we outside? or are we outside?” your bestfriend asks, actually giving you no option as she is already looking through your closet.

“how could i ever tell you no” you spoke out through the exhalation of your smoke before handing her the blunt.

“girl, we are walking farther than our waiting spot!” your half-way tipsy-self giggles out, grabbing Dina as you both lean on the staircase outside of Dina’s apartment building.

the sounds of heels clacking on the concrete through the shared tipsy giggles you both shared as the both of you begin to feel the shots of Don Julio and Fireball Dina offered as a pregame.

“uber comes in 6” Dina says, before putting her phone away inside her big black fur coat that temporarily covered her matching black two-peice.

it was a corset top that hugged her breasts perfectly with the matching flared leggings that had cut-outs on her thick hips, finishing it off with white heels.

“enough time for a smoke” you smirk out which Dina returned before beginning to dig in your mini white purse.

you were wearing a skin-tight halter white dress sparkled with light gold gems that brought out the natural bronze of your skin, hugging all your curves perfectly, exposing your tattoos that sprinkled around your arms, and your thick gold hoops that had ‘CHULA’ written through.

once you had what was left of the blunt from earlier in between your lips, you began to pull out your light from in your long dark-brown leather coat that was complimeted by your dark brown heeled-boots.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

flashing lights of green, red, and blue fading into each other through each flash as you both make your way through the house-party; music from the loud speakers ringing through the both of your ears.

the body heat from all the dancing sweaty bodies engulfing the blaring atmosphere as you pushed through different to people to find your way to the drink station.

“what can i get you ladies, tonight” the server says, mixer in his hand as he was mid-way of making this woman’s mojito.

Dina, of course using all her little flirtatious tricks to rouse free drinks out of him.

you both walk away with accomplished smiles, your pure lime Daiquiri in hand and cherry Mojito in Dina’s.

Dina was also able to convince the server to take care both of your coats, everything that was in your coats now being in your purse’s. he hung your jackets on these hooks right next to where the kitchen begins and home-bar ends.

“may we get swept off our feet by a hot duo!” Dina cheers out, putting her glass in the air.

“amen sista’!” you clink your glasses together before walking off into the sweaty-crowded dance floor.

♫₊˚.🎧 now playing: gatúbela

↻ ◁ || �� ↺

the loud speaker boomed the slight beats, immediately feeling each of the beats go through your body as you feel yourself get hyped to one of your favorite songs begin to play; knowing the drop is gonna come.

it felt like it was destined as you hit the dance floor. immediately grabbing Dina’s hand where she knew exactly what her dance-crazed friend was gonna do with the little liquor in her system; aka you.

you felt the need to make it to the middle of the dance floor before song actually began.

you heard the lyrics engulfing your ear, the drank being the only thing to influence you and your body right now.

Dina automatically taking your free hand, putting it up in the air as your bodies began to whine together to the beat.

both your hips matching each beat smoothly as y’all began to pull people’s attention from around the room.

“estaba loca por casarte, haćertelo rico yo! ojalá puedà quedarte” you and dina began to sing, your bodies beginning to gyrate swiftly towards each other; completely lost in the atmosphere, liquor, and music.

the upbeat rhythm of the reggaeton beat boomed only making your sexy rhythm on Dina faster.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

Ellie wasn’t much for the party scene, she liked the occasional harmless flirting and eye candy to be as a entertainment for her as she smoked her way through the party, only taking a couple shots with Jesse.

Jesse had a friend, Gustavo. he was going to be dj-ing at some house party tonight and when it came down to Jesse, no was not an option to Ellie.

anyways, thats how Ellie ended up in the humid party, standing where she was now; watching all surf-wave of crowded bodies getting down.

she stood there, joint in her hand as her cropped white muscle-tee hugged her chest and exposed her toned abdomen.

she had on jeans, bagging them so her nike pro boxer-lining to peek out.

there was lots of beautiful women at this party, but she was almost falling asleep as Jesse was already flirting with a second girl.

just as she brought the joint to her lips, there you were.

ellie could only spot your silhouette at first.

your shadow was revealed shortly, glowing under the bright dance-floor lighting.

it seemed like Ellie wasn’t the only one you were able to captivate, almost enchanting the whole room.

it was now, you and Dina who were killing it on that dance floor.

random strangers hyping the both of you as some even attempt to get closer to try to dance with the both of you.

it was everything about you that captured her completely. the way your hair moved along with your golden earrings shining with every movement of your body and your tawny skin glistening.

she observed the way you danced and to be frank the way your dress hugged those beautiful curves of yours.

Ellie was salivating at the mouth, you were like a flash-photo moment that would be forever engraved into her membrane.

Jesse had came back with two shots of tequila, she immediately grabbed her shot. not wasting time, ellie needed to get to that dance floor before the end of this fucking song.

“white dress and black dress. spotlight. white dress is mine.” ellie points out quickly, downing the shot and handing the joint to Jesse.

ellie practically flew down those stairs.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

you continued to gyrate your hips sensually.

Dinas hand’s running up’n’down your body as you did the same, both feeling hot under the spell of the music.

you took a couple steps back as your perreo got more confident, slight cheers from women and men ogling the both of you as they try to get closer.

Esto e' una foto porque yo no 'toy pintá

Ya 'toy elevada, me siento gatúbela

Y ese huerfanito necesita una mamá

🫧

you accidentally felt your ass bump up against someone.

“im so sorry!” you yelled over the music, you felt relief once you seen it was a woman, frankly dreading it to be a male.

she was gorgeous in such a different way; she wasn’t a feminine woman and she looked better than any actual man youve ever seen or been with, especially dressed the way she was.

“go head’ mama” was all the fine woman said, signaling that she wanted you to dance; no. throw it on her.

she grabbed the hand that had been on her shoulder as a small friendly gesture to quickly hold it to spin you around.

you were picky if you danced with someone, but boy, you were about to give this girl a show.

🫧

Ay, qué rico!

Cuando me pone el panty de ladito

¡Ay, qué rico!

Ese besito dámelo abajito

each lyric of each beat of that verse was grind and a twerk from your ass on her crotch as her hips rocked into you; it was definitely the alcohol that made ellie this bold.

she followed your rhythm and one hand set on your waist softly as you balanced yourself with your hands on your knees.

she took the free hand that she used to run through her hair, contemplating how she can handle all that, to bring it down to hold your dress down from riding up.

Ay, bendito!

En cuatro yo te pongo rapidito

Mmm, bendito

No me coma' tan rico, papacito

🫧

‘thank god for Jesse and that tequila shot’

the little voice in ellies head thought before quickly vanishing, the only thing on ellie was how fucking horny you made her because of how unbelievably sexy you were.

the small gesture just made you feel secure, only making you pushed your ass into her completely at this point.

the slight tipped over stance you had was now turned into fully bent over as she was practically dry-fucking your shaking ass in-front of the crowd.

Ellie looked around the crowded room, men looked at with her with envy as some women looked at you with hatred which only fueled her ego completely.

she bit her lip as she felt the cockiest smirk smear across her face as she lifted her leg and began to grinding into your ass in complete dog-like motion.

the little bit of friction between the small of your panty brushing across the hard of her zipper which only made your stomach bubble wantingly.

the room might’ve been filled with people and blaring lights but Ellie swore you were the only person in this entire place.

everyone who surrounding the both of you completely fading into a black abyss. it was only the two of you.

the only thing in the moment right now that mattered was this sun-kissed beauty she was dancing with.

there was no way in hell this was the weed or the alcohol.

she wished she could stay here for the rest of her life, not even the fact that you were dancing on her; but the fact it was just you.

your grinds got slower and slower which seemed to bring ellie back down to earth.

the song was ending but this couldn’t.

you thought you would have to pull yourself off and watch as she walked away from you after getting what she wanted, what you thought she wanted.

the auburn hair woman offered you her hand to walk you away from the crowd after you bent yourself back up.

her demeanor felt as sharp as a knife yet her eyes gleamed so gently at you.

ellie’s heart was pounding, her heartbeat drowning out her own sound of the music.

“my-my name’s Ellie!” the woman leaned in slightly so you could hear her over her own heartbeat mixed with the booming music.

you could see her hazel eyes were hooded although they still managed to shine through, mostly cause of the mixture of weed and alcohol.

you had gone nervous under her gaze, the unfamiliar feeling making you a bit uncomfortable but yet she made you comfortable.

you let a nervous smile creep onto your face “nice to meet you Ellie!, my name is ___”

you hated how you had to shout over the music then getting pushed slightly getting pushed by different people as they surround another couple.

you whipped your head, stepping your feet closer to the circle to be nosy and see who it was.

‘shit! where’s Dina?’ you thought.

Ellie noticed how your attention got pulled away to the new crowd of people, sharing your focus. the dance light once again blares down onto the dancing couple.

“Dina!?”

“Oh my god! Jesse!”

the both of you looked at each other.

Ellie found this slightly funny as she couldn’t believe Jesse did the exact same thing.

you share the laugh she had slightly let out before hyping up your bestfriend as she really got into it.

“im guessing you two are bestfriends?” you lean into her ear to question.

Ellie felt your hot breath graze her ear which caused the invisible blimps of her skin to chill-up.

“yeah, i would ask you the same but i already know.” Ellie slys out, looking down at you with a growing want that glints through her pupils.

“excuse me?” you joked out, you were caught slightly off-gaurd.

“you smoke?!” Ellie practically had to shout over the cheering of Dina and Jesse’s very own yiking session.

you gave her a nod which ellie returned with a lick of her lips and signal to the door from her head.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

there was a lot of people outside that actually had the same idea as you two.

you looked around, stumbling slightly on your feet as you weren’t your most sober.

“could i help you? im guessing you’re a bit drunk” Ellie hands go out to catch you incase you were to loose your balance.

“aren’t you so sweet to the girl who just twerked on you. im s’sorry by the-” you slurr out the slightest bit.

ellie shook her head with a smirk of disbelief written all over her face, turning one arm to you slightly to intertwine with.

you gladly accepted her arm “what?” you question as she began to walk you always from the house party. although you were intoxicated you were never so smitten with someone like this.

“nothing to be sorry about here” ellie said, looking up at you as she pulled out a small black cylinder tube from her pocket.

the way her eyes looked at you as the streelights reflected them made your heart race like a pre-teen with their first crush.

you watched through your own droopy eyes her take the joint from the tube in between her lips “you gotta lighter?” she snaps you out of your daze, you had been staring longer than you thought.

“uh-yes! i actually have a whole other blunt in here?” you reply, questioning yourself at the end as you dig in your purse.

it ignited a laugh from Ellie which for some reason echoed through your ears straight to your heart “here ya’go” you hand her your lighter.

she knew you were different, there was no other woman like you. Ellie couldn’t compare even if she tried.

this drove her even more crazy, remembering how women wished they were you in a matter of seconds.

she frankly found it attractive how you handed her a gold-plated lighter, it was fancy too; being one you had to refill.

you could’ve handed her a regular BIC lighter but you didn’t just cause you didn’t have one. you weren’t simple, she knew that off the bat and it yearned for ellie to know more.

“i really like your lighter….’our lady’ ” Ellie compliments, reading the engraved lettering.

she ran her thumb ran over the small painted Virgencita.

she felt her heart swoon even more. she could feel her mind race along with her heart; dying with anticipation.

the anticipation to completely dive herself into your life, create her own little space right next to you, your life. she already wanted to take you home with her and have breakfast in bed.

she wanted to get with you right now and just call you yours.

your energy invisibly mixing with hers creating an unconscious spiritual tug on each other’s hearts.

“thank you—aye!, gotta be protected even as you smoke.” you pointed at her, looking at her playfully serious.

“is that so? i think you’re gonna need to tell me more.” ellie puffed out with a smirk, handing you the joint.

she could feel you grow nervous under your hazy-self which only made her persuasion flourish.

you felt the piney-terpenes fog your brain quicker and create an inner warmth for the skeleton of your body as you inhale the rough smoke with ease.

you grew hot under her gaze not knowing if it was your body flushing or the mix of drugs for the the night.

“so tell me, did you plot on me?” you bluntly ask, passing the joint.

the weed diminishing whatever of was left of your cautious- veil; feeling yourself fall vulnerable with the stranger.

“i wouldn’t necessarily say plot. i had seen a beautiful woman and i just needed to dance with her.”

ellie’s voice echoed through your ears causing goosebumps on your skin. you were acting like you had never been flirted with before and it was embarrassing.

you straighten yourself up, digging in your purse to get your phone. you weren’t trying to disregard her compliment but you also came to your senses.

but to ellie, it sure felt like you did.

you unlocked your phone.

12:05 AM

it was just past midnight and as nice as this was….

you shook your head trying to recollect in your mind what to say “uhm-im sorry—you’re really nice—err, we should check on our friends.” you stammered across your words, biting your lip as you felt bad.

Ellie agreed as her mind began to race.

are you not gay?

had she been delusional?

did she read this all the wrong way?

she felt like an idiot as she handed you the joint. she felt your hand shiver as your fingertip grazed her knuckles.

you both began to walk off into the party, leaving the both tension-filled.

the both of you pushed through, ellie staying hot on your heels to not loose you within the surf of people.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

it didn’t take you long to find your brunette bestfriend with her large fur coat back on as she seemed enthralled with Jesse at the bar, sat on the stool with her on his lap.

you both approached them and they soon look your direction with big drunk smiles “Ellie! ma’girl of the night!” Jesse drunkily exclaims, taking his hand out in dap-up motion.

ellie didn’t seem so confident and assured this time as she approached him with a slight smile and seemed to put any emphasis into their gesture; you picked up on this.

now it was you that bombarded yourself with questions.

have you made a complete total fool of yourself?

did she think i didn’t like it?

how could you pratically dry fuck the girl and then shut her down like that?

does she think i shut her down?

you didn’t know what to think or what you were even thinking, i mean…did you like her? it was obvious she wasn’t straight and well you….honestly was never quite sure.

you knew you felt like shit now, she had been giving you all her energy.

you were too busy in your head to even listen.

“Ya heard that, girl? that ass got her in-love” Dina teased out, looking in-between you and ellie as her eyebrows wiggle.

you heard ellie scoff as she scratched the back of her neck, she continued to look at her feet.

you grabbed your coat which you knew Dina must have brought back, sliding in through both of your arms before your heels clicked closer to Ellie’s side.

“is that so? i think you’re gonna need to tell me more.”

you felt yourself bubble up confidently, it was your turn to smirk as you spoke.

ellie immediately whipped her head up as you stole her line from earlier.

it was visible Ellie flushed as crimson creeped onto her cheeks “what would you like to drink? it’s only fair since you took me for a sesh.” you offer, your arm interlinking with her mimicking the exact same actions except you were the instigator this time.

now ellie felt like a deer in headlights, caught off guard slightly. she didn’t except you to reciprocate the same confidence.

you both sat on the chairs next to Jesse and Dina.

“what could i get you two?” the bartender ask “i’ll be having a Michelada and hottie right here will have…" you say, making eye contact once you called her a ‘hottie’.

you could see ellie’s tongue poke through her cheek, trying to bite back amusement.

ellie swore you were going to make her heart explode with how fast it had been beating for the past hour.

“water with lime, thank you.” ellie replies, not even looking at the bartender when she said thank you. only you in her peripheral.

you were in utter perfect view for her, she could take in every feature and detail of your body.

the black wing-liner illuminating the natural shine of your gaze as your lips were complimented by a faded brown outline that blended in perfectly each time you smiled.

“so, is it my ass or me you fell in love with?”

“in love a strong word, mama” she quirked back.

that little nickname shot right through your ears straight to your stomach, fluttering it at the recollection.

you giggled and god, ellie didn’t think someone’s laugh could be so infectious.

“they were right though” ellie bit her lip slightly, not really wanting to look up at you as she referes to what Jesse and Dina said earlier.

she didn’t realize you were too in your head to pay attention.

“and what’s that exactly?”

“you really into repeating things, huh?” Ellie jokes out which you playfully roll your eyes too.

“wouldn’t you like to know…” your tone was suggestive as you leaned into her.

you weren’t quite sure what you were doing but it almost all felt natural now like you were meant to be; here, doing this, with her.

ellie thought she was delusional, hearing things and seeing things.

“i don’t dance—not like that, but you—whew…i wasn’t lying outside. im lucky it got to be you” ellie continues to insuinate teasingly, completely dazed under the bright light orange lighting illuminating from the bar-lights.

your makeup was almost cat-like making your eyes almost seem black by the dark eyeliner that tranced along your eyes.

you even had tattoos that speckled across your arms, she knew you had more and oh to explore those….

ellie was able to finally take in your jewelry, you had your very own name-plated gold necklace that dazzled amongst your natural russet-glow.

you were fiddling with one of your gold hoops which she observed as she read CHULA going through the earring.

ellie was shamelessly eye-fucking you, she knew it wasn’t appropriate.

it had only hit midnight and this green-eyed beauty was ready to get her car keys and tuck you into her bed, she could care less about anything let alone anyone as she lost herself in you.

she didn’t even realized but ellie had been unconsciously leaning into you, feeling the warmth of your aroma.

just like that, the drinks were being slid infront of you.

you would say you sipped your michi once you got it, but liquid courage amirite?

“how many women have you used that on, hm?” you play it off, feeling yourself become overwhelmed by the hedonistic feelings she urged from your heart.

it was unfamiliar to you, she was a woman and she’s the first to challenge you.

ellie’s expression furrowed as she raises the glass to her face.

your bold and catty personality intimidated men. you couldn’t remember the last time you grew nervous under male attention.

yet here you were, using your all to keep a cool composure with this woman.

she intimidated you. you didn’t like it, yet it was something you would now yearn for like a new drug.

“my first and i hope my last.”

ellie’s voice was above a meer whisper but you heard her loud and clear as your faces were just inches away from each other.

your tense auras begged to kiss, it seemed destined, almost too natural.

your eyes jumped in between her dulcet green eyes and her plumped lips.

it took everything in ellie not crash her lips onto yours, she didn’t want to scare you off.

it was almost like she knew something was up.

yet, you still inched closer.

you let the energies talk to each other almost, your central-egos almost fighting to accept but it was too insatiable.

your lips connect ever so softly. they fell so perfectly into each other, connecting like two magnets.

ellie could sense your hesitation which confused her but she tried her best to ease you by her kisses being peck-like.

ellie’s lips were so soft, it felt like you were kissing a cloud almost.

it felt like your lips had already been connected for centuries, familarized with the shape and movement.

the perfect sync was created between your kiss, you felt yourself fall into her as all your weary thoughts dwindle away.

you had suddenly forgetten why you were so hesitant.

you forgot why you were embarrassed earlier.

you forgot about the stressful morning you had with handling break-up messages.

hell, you had forgotten about him.

she completely belittled the memory of ever getting cheated on, as if it never happened.

by now, your faces were flushed together lips moving in quick hot-sync; far gone from the small little pecks now.

ellie could taste your lip-gloss.

was that watermelon flavor? oh my god…

you could feel ellie’s lip slightly quiver as she tried to get more access to your mouth, wanting to explore it more with tongue.

you give in easily as her steady warm-breathing through her nostrils were enough to make your body fuzzed up.

you wished to her closer to you, craving more of the bliss she brought you.

it was almost like ellie could sense you, she could feel and see each and every thought you had.

if that was the case, you would’ve scared the poor girl off by now.

she leaned closer into the kiss, her tongue lightly swiping at the bottom of your lip to pick up more of your flavored-gloss.

ellie’s hand rested on your lower knee, her thumb caressing figures onto your skin.

your breathing was staggered as you struggled to continue to kiss her, making yourself almost forceful as you try to continue.

it was almost too easy.

she made you too easy.

something a man could never conquer out of you.

you found yourself having to end up paying at the end of the night due to you leaving your brainless date there.

yet, everything that she oozed of attracted you like a fly to a lightbulb.

then everything stopped, almost like a vinyl abruptly screeching-stop on a record player.

she had pulled away from you, she looked a bit concerned “you okay?” ellie tried looking in your eyes for any sign of discomfort.

you were sure a slight flushed out hue was evident on your face as a mix of embarrassment and heat from the kiss.

jesus, can you get anymore embarrassing

you mentally scolded—you wish you could bitch-slap yourself right now.

you turned your stool back to your drink on the table, not looking at ellie but your glass.

a pool of water ringed around under the glass after you both left your drinks to let the ice-cubes melt in.

you fiddled with your straw as you drank from your glass “ya’ never make a woman breatheless before?” you tried to play coy.

you squinted at her playfully as you sipped “you could have anyone here and you know if.” she bit her lip, sneering out.

you were taken aback at by her gruffness, you didn’t deny the fact as you opened your mouth to respond—

“EVERYONE GO THE FUCK HOME! THE POLICE IS ON THERE WAY! GO THE FUCK HOME, THE CLUB, I DONT CARE! JUST GET THE FUCK OUT MY HOUSE! THANK YOU EVERYBODY HAVE A BLESSED NIGHT!” (random party host dude)

crowds began to scatter as the music abruptly stops, shrieks from some people rang through the building. it was almost a natural instinct grabbing ellie’s hand.

“we took an uber here!” you heard Dina explain as you ran up to her.

“Ellie drove, we’ll drop you off! we need to leave now!” Jesse shouts, pointing to the balcony that was slid wide open by others that ran out.

you stayed close to Dina as she held onto Jesse and you held onto ellie.

༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻ ༺ ♱ ༻

the way the four of you ran together off into ellie’s car.

Ellie driving away while your in the passenger as Dina and Jesse make-out in the back.

you watching the police cars speed past you, unknowing that you were ever at that party.

Ellie’s eyes bounced in between her view and her car mirror; you had folded down to reapply your lip combo not too long ago.

she would steal glances at you, meeting your eyes occasionally.

the way your eyes sparkled as you grew shy that she caught you staring at her drive.

it was all canon, planned by divine timing.

so you could imagine how disheartening it was when ellie arrived to not yours, but Dina’s address.

Jesse and Dina stepped out first, it was almost like they wanted to give you a moment alone.

there was a moment of silence between the two of you as your eyes burned into each other.

you both wanted to soak in this cloud y’all created.

“give me your phone.” you beamed out, glow illuminating through her windscreen from Dina’s apartment lights.

you took one last good look at Ellie.

you took in the way her freckles sprinkled across her face, her pink lips pursed, and her skin glistened through by the light.

ellie gave you a loopy grin which made you giggle.

you began to tap away on her phone, creating your contact.

gatúbela 💋

111-222-33444

you opened her camera, turning the flash on. you straighten your posture before doing a quick wink as the picture snapped.

Ellie’s eyes just gawked into you, a lip tugged between her teeth.

you knew exactly who you were and Ellie couldnt wait to fucking find out.

“you give your number out to just anyone?” ellie teases, playing questionaire like you; earlier in party.

“you’re the first i give my real one too!” you giggled out which caused ellie to laugh along with you.

“im actually very flattered, mama” the nickname seemed too natural now, it was officially reserved for you and ellie didn’t even know.

now it was you biting your lip, stopping from smiling like an idiot at the epithet she referred to you as before.

she smirked as she looked down at the contact, the name of the song that was playing when you both were dancing.

you unlooped your mini-purse from around your arm, digging in it.

“here, so you don’t forget about me”

you put your chocolate lipliner in her cupholder.

just like that, you were exiting her car as Jesse took the passenger seat you were once sat in.

you walked off into the midnight, entering through dark apartment building.

ellie spent the rest of her night replaying every moment of you like her favorite movie.

ellie couldn’t forget you, not after tonight.

she is going to see you again, she would make sure of it.

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[drawnfamiliarfaces]

1.) Height comparisons? Tallest to shortest? I ways felt that Danny was tallest with Randy as the shortest, but Ben feels small too? And Rex feels giant.

2.) What would Jenny and Rex look like with Upgrade on them?If you have any concepts of them?

I love these little guys, btw they make me so happy!

1.) I actually have a height chart I never posted! I am STILL not completely locked in about them, but I've been holding onto it for a year, so I think I can post it since Ive not worked on it much. xD So while small details might vary in any future plot development, this is a rough height comparison for the HoMies:

My reasonings are that canonically (? at least according to Wikias) Jenny is at least 2 meters tall in the show. Which is a lil questionable, but I just headcanon her around that height, but it can vary depending on her transformations. In any case she is a tall Amazonian Mechanical Goddess.

Both Danny and Zak have very tall genes from both sides of their families. Jack F. is a freaking tank unit of a man, and while Maddie is probably somewhere above average height, her sister Alicia is built af, so there are some tall genes on their side of the family. Doc and Drew are both pretty tall, and Doyle too, so chances of Zak being on a taller side are very good.

Jun canonically has very long legs (which was mentioned as too long for an 11 y.o. to which I relate a lot, because I was very tall at 11 too xD) & Randy is a very noodly boy, so I feel like they will grow pretty tall. But Randy is also very slight in built which will make him seem smaller.

Ben in his alt futures is supposedly very tall, but Omniverse throws a curve with him suddenly seeming smaller at 16, so?? I kinda settled on him being kinda average male height, which can go either way when he gets older.

Rex is kinda opposite, because at 16-17 he is pretty tall, but not overly huge (considering that he is still shorter than Six but only a little taller than Holiday on heels, so he is taller than average female height), but I headcanon him having grown tall very early. So I kind of settled on another average that can go either way as years go.

And yes, he is a little taller and buffer than Ben, because when they swapped jackets in Heroes United, Ben's jacket is tighter on him and that fact is forever my favorite headcanon. xD

Jake and Kim are short monarchs! Well, compared to others, lol xD. In reality they are only a few inches/cm lower than average heights! I am a big fan of Jake being a short powerhouse (its also supported by his genetics, mainly by his grandfather Lao Shi, who is pretty short even when he was younger) in his human form, which doesn't affect his dragon form. Kim is a small lean power machine - she is small, agile and fast, for a normal human.

2.) Oh! I did have another idea I sort of toyed with (A sort of 'fusions' for HoMies for another old ask I got, but I never got around to drawing them lol sorry), but I never actually drew anything like that! This is a fun idea to doodle-

After the finale Rex has changed and I would like to think that Ben will notice! After all becoming a god temporarily would be something of an upgrade! xD And tbh I think Jenny, as a sentient machine would not particularly enjoy being Upgraded! It would feel a little bit like possession, but with a side effect of your guts being rearranged without your consent, like?? yikes

Aaaaaa, thank you!!! I'm so glad people get joy from this crossover, even if im so inconsistent with actually posting staff for it QvQ <3

[s-i-ll-y-w-i-ll-y]

Be our guest~

Hannigram/ Hannibal Lecter x Will Graham x Teen!reader

Summary: Hannibal and Will host a small dinner party between themselves, a work friend and her family. But with Will and Hannibal, there’s no such thing as a happy ending.

TW! Drugging, Delulu Hannibal, mention of blood, mention of vomit(not detailed)

~~~~~~

“Do we have to eat with them?” Your father groaned to your mother as he parked the car next to the house.

“Yes. They’re my friends and it’s not everyday we get to eat out.” Your mother snapped back. She opened her car door and stepped out slowly, brushing down the creases in her dress.

With a heavy sigh, you opened your car door and followed your mother to the small, metal gate at the front of the garden. The silky darkness of night preventing any greenery to show over the bars, causing the grey stone path ahead to be hard to navigate.

You held onto your mother’s arm as she stumbled forward in her heels. “It would be great to have my husband walk me to the front door. Not my child.” She scoffed bluntly.

“Walk yourself. You’d nag at me the whole way anyways.” Your father retorted, trailing behind. He passed your mum a bottle of wine, practically shoving it into her arms.

Your mother fixed her hair before pressing the doorbell. A pleasant ring echoed behind the tall door and soon after the door creaked open.

“Y/M/N, Hannibal and I are so happy you could make it.” The man smiled as he stepped aside to allow your family to enter, taking the bottle of wine from your mum with a small thank you. He shook your fathers hand before guiding you all to the lounge. They’re house was big. Bigger than yours or any house you had been in before. It had room after room all the way down the hall, with a big staircase at the end. Each wall had something on it, either art or a clock. No family photos or honeymoon pictures. Just rich art or an old clock.

The man sat down beside your dad, although while speaking to your parents his eyes were tracked on you. Eventually he looked away to address all of you, “Hannibal’s in the kitchen at the moment, hopefully he’ll be through in a second to greet you.”

And, as if it were rehearsed, who you assumed was Hannibal waltzed through the doorway. He dried his hands off with a towel before throwing it over his shoulder. “Y/M/N, I’m so glad you could come. Good to see you as well, Y/F/N, have you been doing better since our last appointment?”

Your father rolled his eyes and made himself comfortable on a leather sofa before answering, “Yeah yeah, I’ve been doing great.”

You looked towards your mother, noticing how her gaze lingered on Hannibal, her eyes taking in every inch of him. She never looked at your dad like that.

Yikes.

Hannibal narrowed his eyes and stared at your father for a moment too long, as if he was analysing him, before reverting his gaze to you. “You must be Y/N. Your father speaks of you often.”

“All bad, I assume.” You joked, offering the man a small smile.

He hummed at your joke, returning the smile. “Well, I’m sorry to cut this short but I have to get back to work. Y/F/N, would you care to help me?” His gaze darted back to your dad.

Begrudgingly, your father stood up and sauntered over to Hannibal, presumably to follow him into the kitchen.

“So, Y/N,” the other man began, “your mother tells me you’re heading down the same path as her. Studying to be a criminal psychologist too?”

You gently nodded, “That’s what I’m hoping for.”

A somber silence fell between the three of you until your mother spoke up and sparked a conversation which you had no interest in. Something about Abel Gideon’s attack or whatever.

After half an hour of boring conversation and staring at the ceiling, Dr Lecter called all of you through to the dining room. That’s how you found out the other man’s name, Will.

You took your seat between Will and Dr Lecter, letting your parents sit together. The adults began chatting about work and life and God knows what else. All of it was boring.

While you were poking and prodding at the fish on your plate you heard your name be muttered by Dr Lecter. Your head shot up in his direction.

“What do you think?”

A soft blush burned your cheeks as you bashfully stated, “I’m really sorry but I haven’t been paying attention.”

He chuckled softly before asking what you thought of the food. To which you only gave compliments, not wanting to upset him. Dr Lecter smiled softly, thanking you, before turning back to speaking with your parents.

Throughout the numerous courses Dr Lecter brought out, you slowly began to feel more and more sick and tired, to the point where you felt your eyes rolls back in your head and your stomach churn and ache.

You gently placed your fork on your plate and leaned back in your chair, immediately gaining attention from Will who nudged you.

“You okay, kid?” His face strewn with worry.

Sweat dripped down your brow as you nodded sharply, “Yeah, no, I’m fine. I’m just tired.”

“Well, we have a guest bedroom upstairs that we would be more than happy to let you borrow.” Dr Lecter chimed in.

“No it’s okay. I’ll be fine.”

“We insist.”

After that you had no say in wether you went or not. Will slowly guided you up the stairs and down the hall, at points he was pausing to make sure you were fine.

You always said you were fine despite your migraine making your vision blurry and your feet feeling numb. Once you reached the top of the stairs, you fell into Will and luckily he caught you, picking you up before you could try to stand again. You would have been so embarrassed if you hadn’t been feeling this bad.

The walk to the spare bedroom was tedious. Time felt as if it had slowed down to taunt you- to make sure you felt every second of pain.

Finally, Will reached the room. The door creaked open and the light flickered on. Through your blurry vision you almost thought it was your room at home. Same bed frame, wardrobe, vanity, dresser- all of it was identical. Maybe you were just being crazy. Maybe this was your brain trying to comfort you and make you see a place that makes you feel safe.

He gently placed you down on the bed, making you sit up to the best of your ability while he took off your shoes so the sheets didn’t get muddy. He then pulled back the duvet and let you fall onto the pillow, immediately falling asleep. He smiled, softly brushing hair out of your face before stepping out of the room and turning off the lights.

~

A loud crash abruptly woke you up, jolting you upright. A sense of dread washed over you as you peeled back the covers and slowly navigated your way to the thin line of light emerging from the frame of the door.

A shiver racked down your spine as the cold, hard wooden floors touched your feet.

Each step on the floor creaked under the weight of you. The loudness made you worried that the wrong person could hear and come to get you.

They were probably just watching a movie, you reasoned with yourself, trying to think of any logical explanation while feeling like something was watching you.

The abyss like darkness which awaited you at the bottom of the steps was the worst. That feeling of dread set in faster and harder as you stepped into the nothingness that called out for you.

Trying to find a way around this house felt impossible. You felt like a rat trapped in a maze trying to find its reward, and your rat race reward could only be freedom.

You crept into the kitchen, then the dining room, then the lounge, flicking on the lights as you did. Each one you were wary about entering, that dread in your stomach building up more and more.

And when a hand clasped your shoulder, you felt like crying out. You spun around, pushing the hand away and stumbling to the plush, carpeted floor. Looking up, you saw the slim and shadowed figure of one of your hosts for the evening,

Will.

Your eyes widened as you heard him call out for Hannibal. Quickly, you scrambled to your feet and made a mad dash for the closest exit, accidentally bumping into something.

Something whose chest rose and fell with each heavy heaving breath, something which grabbed you and pulled you close, something that glistened with sweat and blood in the bright white moonlight from out the old windows.

“It’s alright, Mischa..” Hannibal sighed, holding you against him, “You’re safe now.”

~~~~~~~

02:03 Saturday, 10th of August 2024

10/8/24

AN- this is low-key shit, but I kinda like the idea. I just don’t think I could write it well.

Also, three hours ago it was my birthday 🥳🥳🦅

Love you all :3

[hannahssimblr]

It’s a dreary, drizzly evening that calls for streetlights earlier than usual, their light straining weakly through the thick mist off the bay, and as I glance down at Ivy with droplets of rain beading on the halo of frizz around her plaits I consider the fact that she was right, a jacket wouldn’t have been the worst idea. 

The lights are on early at Michelle’s house too, the voile netting over the netting in the living room window not giving anything away inside, just the vague shapes of whatever is on the television.

As always, the door is off the latch, and inside Jen is leaning against the counter by the toaster spinning a butter knife in her fingers. She gives me a wary look when we see each other. “She’s in the living room,” and holds her hand out to Ivy, “Hey Ives, do you wanna hang out with me for a little while? C’mere, oh, who did your hair today? Was it your brother? Yikes, okay let me have a look at this…”

I gingerly push through to the living room, where Michelle is engaged in an intense discussion with both of her parents. She’s slumped on the couch with puffy eyes while they stand with their backs to the fire, glancing at me with alarm as I enter the room wielding a bar of chocolate, which, in hindsight is a bit of a pathetic celebratory or consolation prize. 

“Hi.”

“Oh good, Jude,” Rahim beckons me over to the couch to sit with Michelle, and I take her hand, “can you tell her that this is not the end of the world?” He’s saying, voice tinged with impatience, “There are plenty of other opportunities.”

“Zero, huh?” I say gently, and she shakes her head, arm trembling as she passes the letters to me. One, two, three rejections. I read one of them briefly, from Paris. 

“‘...unimaginative and containing cliches…’ wow, that feels a bit harsh, doesn’t it? I don’t think they needed to be all like that about it.”

She breaks down in tears, “I’m a terrible artist.”

“No, you aren’t,” I skim through the one from Berlin, “Look, they’ve said here that this year’s application was their strongest in history. Don’t beat yourself up about it.”

“I just feel so stupid.”

“What? No, you’re the furthest thing from stupid.”

“Michelle, there are other options,” Rahim practically pleads, “Why don’t you go back to the application portal before it is too late and put down something more reasonable?”

Debra agrees, “This is what we’ve been saying, Michelle, maybe art is wrong for you. See? You shouldn’t have changed your mind in the first place. There’s a good reason you decided against it-”

“Yeah well I want to do it now, don’t I?” Michelle snarls, swatting tears away from her cheeks, “Jude and I are doing this together, it’s already decided.”

Her mother eyes me warily before deciding that I should probably hear this too, “Love, you know it’s not always a good idea to make big life decisions based on your boyfriend. Nothing lasts forever.”

“How could you say that?”

“What happened to veterinary science, hm? Wouldn’t that be a good career?”

“I wanted to be a vet when I was like, seven, what are you on about?” 

“Or she could be a doctor, like me!” Rahim attempts, but this is only met with a fresh barrage of sobs. I rub my girlfriend’s back uselessly while the chocolate softens inside its wrapper against the heat of my leg. 

Debra is looking at me empathetically as I comfort her daughter, as though she and I have some connection now, like a baton has passed through some small exclusive club for people who have held Michelle while she cries. “How did you get on with your applications?” 

“Oh, um, yeah, I got in,” I feel guilty even saying it but Michelle doesn’t really react to the news, as though she already made an assumption, but I jump in to finish quickly before she can make another. “I won’t be accepting any of them, though, I mean, obviously. I was only ever going to move away if Michelle was coming too, and, you know, unless London works out then that won’t happen.”

Michelle kneads her eye with the heel of her hand, “Did you not get the email?”

“What email?”

“From the London school.”

“Uh, no, I just saw the letters.”

Her eyes widen, “So you didn’t see the NCAD email either?”

“Since when were there emails?” 

“Oh my God,” she’s on her feet then, all of her misery forgotten in favour of urgency. “Go and look right now, what the hell?”

“Love,” Debra attempts soothingly, “it’s probably better if Jude checks his emails on his own, isn’t it? The last thing we want is for this to set you off-”

We’re already running for the stairs, her behind me prodding my back the whole way up in a way that feels like she’s forcing me to walk the plank to my untimely death in a tank of piranhas. We burst into her room and she runs to navigate to gmail while I sweat despite the temperature of her room, which is always kind of cold. 

I log in and the page loads up to two new emails sitting brazenly in my inbox.  

“There they are, click them!”

“Michelle I just want to say that-”

“Oh, come on,” she seizes the mouse and clicks for me, first the one from London, and her voice is flat, “They accepted you. No surprises.”

“It doesn’t matter though, does it? If they didn’t accept you too then I’m not going.”

“Mm.” She immediately clicks the next one, from NCAD, “It’s just points,” she mutters in explanation, “So it all depends on our leaving cert,” scrolling, she reaches the bottom of the email where my points sit, undeniable in a bold black font against stark white. 

I feel her stiffen. “One thousand?” 

“Uh, wow, is that good?”

There is a long pause. “Jude, that’s literally maximum points.”

I can’t bring myself to look at her right away, but I feel her eyes on the side of my face, searing holes through my skin. 

“I thought your interview went badly.”

“Yeah me too!”

“Well then-” she breaks off to make some noise that’s somewhere between a scoff and a sob, “then how did you get such ludicrously high points?”

“Like what I said, I suppose. They were arseholes to everyone on purpose,” I spin around to her, “What did you get?”

“Four fifty.”

So I grab hold of her hands and hold her very tightly and very still, I want to seem sure, “No matter what happens, we’ll be okay,” I promise, “Even if none of this works out for you, I’ll still be right here, do you hear me?”

She nods. 

“I’m not going anywhere without you. God, I mean, why would I even do that? You’ll get NCAD off the back of your leaving cert points, I’m one hundred percent sure. And... even if you don't, I'll stay in Dublin.” As soon as I say it I start feeling nauseated, and dizzy, a bit heady like I’ve inhaled some miscellaneous gas from the science lab, but I fight through it, “fuck all of those stupid plans for going abroad, right? I’m here.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m serious.”

“I know.”

“Okay, c’mere,” I pull her into me and hold her tightly, taking in the smell of her hair, the way her narrow shoulders, her birdlike frame softens in my arms and accept that this is the comfort I will rely on from now on. True, it’s not always easy with Michelle, but we really do love each other. Sometimes love is work, but love is rare and worth holding onto with both hands and your whole heart. All those plans I had, I think, they were misguided, a youthful mistake. Perhaps at some point in the future I can move to Amsterdam, or Paris, or Berlin, or London, and do something creative and exciting, but not now. That’s what I’ll do in ten years, when everything is different. I’ll make sure to tell Sam. 

Who did I think I was, really, trying to do all of that at eighteen? Now is for this, for Michelle. For doing something right.

“I love you,” she says, and I wonder, with her cheek resting against my chest, if she can somehow hear the way my heart tightens as though grasped by a fist, or how my breath catches in my throat when she says it. I’m surprised by the rising feeling that I might start crying, but I force it down.  

Crying over what, Jude? I sneer at myself. 

Yeah, that’s what I thought. Something stupid, as usual.

Beginning // Prev // Next

[novashelby]

Evie Meets Gina

"I keep it classy, but I'm not afraid to slap a bitch." Summary: Evie hates confrontation. So, when Evie meets Gina and it doesn't go well...she sort of just...snaps? Word count: 978...this was suppose to be 100...whoops Warning: Swearing, childhood trauma Thank you @tea-atfive for participating in my drabble request thing. Flor requested how Evie would interact with Gina...and oh, boy....yikes. Not well.

“I hate her,” Martha said, leaning against the doorframe; the threshold that separated the dining room and parlor. Evie was behind her, rearranging the table set. On her heels, Martha twirled around, lips pursed. “Doesn’t she know that if she bleaches her hair enough, it starts to make you bald-”

“Martha!” Evie scolded, hitting her hands to her side. “Now you’re just being ridiculously catty, you know that?” Evie popped an olive in her mouth and walked over to her best friend. “And you only hate her because I don't like her.” She pinched her best friend’s nose, their mouths breaking into a wave of school girl giggles. 

“Who don’t you like?” Aunty Polly came from the other door behind them. She wiped her hand on the white apron, looking around tirelessly. She mumbled under her breath as she counted, humming. 

Martha lost her snarky smile, and sang, “Hi, Ms. Gray!” 

“Martha,” she greeted back. 

Martha gave Evie a grin, adding a mocking wink. “I’m gonna go mingle with the handsome folk in the other room.” Evie whined as Martha landed a big, obnoxious kiss on her cheek and waltzed off. 

“Fuckin’ ell,” she mumbled, wiping the spit off her cheek as she continued to help her aunt. “Why do you still do this if we have maids?” Polly looked over, clothing napkins in her hand.

“It’s good to keep some humanity left in you.” She folded one neatly and placed it over the plate. “And in this family, we need every last bit of it that we can get-rearrange the spoons and knives!” Evie nodded, silently working at her task when Polly asked again, “and who were you and Martha chatting about?”

“Just school girl gossip, Aunty.” She smiled over. “No one important, really.” Evie put down her last knife, and exited the kitchen. Sneaking from the festivities, Evie went upstairs to her room. Her room was her space that even her father respected to an extent. One could imagine when Evie walked around the door frame and spotted her, Evie was quite upset. “Hello?” she questioned, tilting her head. 

Gina had been at her desk, looking over each and every picture frame. With each one, she picked up, her fingers would caress over the glass. She was holding the one of Evie and Tommy…It was the day Evie turned sixteen and they had a party. It was a beautiful photo, truly, because despite all of Tommy’s pain at the time, he looked happy. Evie wanted to rip it from her hands. Gina took a moment to answer, and when she did, she didn’t care to show a single ounce of shame. “Your room is quite,” she paused, looking around. “Sweet.” She put the picture down and picked up her school portrait when she was ten; chubby and toothless. It was her father’s favorite. 

“What are you doing in here?” Evie asked, a bit curt in her tone. She moved aside, motioning to the door. “The party is downstairs. There’s also a loo downstairs-”

Gina held up the photo, smirking. “Cute. Fat cheeks, round face…tooth gap.” 

“I was ten there.”

Gina nodded, humming to herself, looking the girl up and down. “Not much has changed.” With a rather loud clunk Gina put down the wooden framed picture and walked over to Evie, smiling. It was as genuine as her. Never knowing how to navigate the cattiness, Evie wasn’t like her Aunt Ada and Aunty Pol’. Despite the woman being tiny, she felt smaller and unmatched. Her breath hitched as Gina said, “Michael told me about you…about your mom. She comes from Boston?”

Evie nodded. 

“She was a, um, a…whore?” 

Evie closed her eyes. “Gina, I’d like to join my family back downstairs. I think you should find what you want and leave my room-”

“I think she’s back in Boston,” Gina said, offering a smile that held no true genuineness. “My uncle knows her, actually.” Evie snapped, eyes wide. “Isn’t that funny?”

“W-what-”

“That how tiny this world is. Her name is Cindy, right?” Gina nodded. “Cindy…that was it. Maybe a reunion would be in the works-”

“Gina, get out of my room.” Evie’s fists clenched. From the corner of her eye, she spotted a wine glass on her dresser off to her right. The rim was spotted with the same shade of red that laid on Gina’s lips. 

Gina dared to say one more thing. “It’s funny how you haven’t seen her in ten years, yet, you are so much alike. Mooching off men and taking them for what they have. Tell me, Evelyn, because Michael is convinced you’ll live here with Tommy until he dies….Do you have any ambitions? Or will you eventually lay on your back like your mother?” She let Gina’s words sink in before her hand reached for the glass stem. Before Evie could compose herself, the red-almost purple wine was painted on Gina’s crisp, white cocktail dress. “Shit!” she cursed out loud, jumping back. The bit of wine that got on her chin, dripped.

Evie lost all facial expressions, placing the sticky glass back down and wiping her hands on her skirt. “I thought your dress needed some color.” Evie grinned. “You’re welcome.” Gina shook off her hands, mouth agape, glaring at the girl. Before she could get the last word, Evie walked out and down the stairs. Her anger brewed from the top stair to the bottom. Michael ambushed her at the stairs.

“Have you seen-”

Slap. The crack was so loud, everyone turned around. The air went dead silent except for Isaiah’s whistle. Michael was holding his cheek. “Stay out of my fucking business, Michael!” Evie said, pushing by. Martha ran up to her side, trying to ask what happened. Not answering, she said, “let’s go-”

“What happened?”

“Martha! I said let’s go!”

“Alright, alright,” Martha agreed. “I guess we are leaving!”

[larsisfrommars]

Wild Wild Reviews

The Night of The Inferno

Overall Score:

Story: 3/5

Dame: 4/5

Villain: 2/5

Gadgets: 5/5

Disguises: 2.5/5

Bonus Points: Gay Subtext: 1/5

The Yikes Dated Factor: -3/-5

Score: 14.5/25 (58%)

Tier: D

Next Review

FULL REVIEW UNDER CUT

The Story

It’s a pretty straight forward plot that introduces most of the core elements of the show fairly well. We’ve got our inflable and courageous James West, our over the top villains, our femme fatale and our gadgets but it feels as though the story is missing a limb. That limb of course is Artemus Gordon. Yes Ross Martin is there playing counterpart to Robert Conrad but he doesn’t really seem like the Artie we know and love yet. He’s less intelligent marvels at inventions that given the later context of the show he could’ve (and probably did) build himself, and lets Jim do the detective work. His disguises aren’t a big focus, and he’s noticeably more of a coward than he is later on. Luckily they fix all this almost immediately but between this and the casual early 60s racism this episode suffers a bit.

The Dame

Our woman of the week is Suzanne Pleshette!

Most of us young’uns know her as the witch Yubaba from Spirited Away and/or Zira from Lion King 2. However she was a very accomplished TV actress before that! I think she does a fantastic job as Lydia Monteran!

She and Jim have history which is always a fun gimmick, and certainly way more fleshed out than the parade of other women in this series. She’s got her own illegal business and lots of personality, a classic femme fatale. She just doesn’t have a lot in the way of complex/personal motivations and doesn’t really affect the plot with her direct actions, which is why she isn’t a perfect score.

The Villain

Our villains of the week are Nehemiah Persoff and Victor Buono!

Now I don’t know Persoff from anything other than Papa from American Tail. His character bordered on caricature/hammy but I am honestly shocked to say that he was WAY more entertaining to watch than Victor Buono of all people?! He was very animated and had a lot of fun lines. Meanwhile Buono (who I know as the unhinged King Tut from Batman) was both chronically underutilized and the crux of the more dated and problematic aspects of this installation of the series. Generally though these villains lacked the camp and ridiculous plans/motivations that I love the series for. So I’d say they’re a little subpar overall

The Gadgets

The gadgets were PHENOMENAL in this episode. If it has a real saving grace it’s the gizmos, a cornerstone of what makes this show work. We get an introduction to The Wanderer, West’s notorious toolbox boot heels, and a really fun Chekhov’s Gun scenario with the self-defense measures built into the billiards table! Excellent visuals and gimmicks that will carry on throughout the series.

The Disguises

The disguises were… eh. Which makes sense for the pilot but also it’s a shame, considering just how much it becomes an integral part of Ross Martin’s multi-faceted performance as Artemus Gordon. We get him as some sorta grave robber/carpet bagger that seems to exclusively exist to be silly at Jim’s expense, and a brief appearance as a Mexican beggar. Only one really makes sense for the story and we see it for all of two seconds.

The Gay Subtext

(Don’t ship it? Skip it!)

So long as Artemus and Jim are in an episode together the Gay score will never be 0. That being said they haven’t established a rapport, or even Artemus as a solid character yet. So is absolutely bottom rung for subtext in a given episode to me. Artemus frets over Jim a little and musters up his courage in spooky environs but that’s about it.

The Yikes Dated Factor

I’m giving this a solid -3 because yes there are more sexist/racist episodes than this but there are also LESS racist/sexist episodes of this show than this one. The only reason this doesn’t get a worse score for the yellow face is because it was part of the villain’s ploy, so they technically didn’t have a white man playing a Chinese guy. It was a white guy pretending to be Mexican pretending to be Chinese, which is almost funny, almost. But then, we got a couple white guys playing Mexicans which (there are plenty of people in the Latine diaspora who are white.) still runs into caricature and colorism issues. The baddies are all foreigners sometimes pretending to be different foreigners with some casual orientalism. But hey! At least the Spanish wasn’t gibberish!

[mysteriouslee]

lee!April ler!Raph

(Rottmnt)

She had really done it now. She was running through the turtle's from a big bad in red.

"You cant hide forever" said Raph in a sing song tone.

April was hiding in the arcade area, her hands covering her mouth as she hid. Suddenly she grabbed by the collar like a cat and trapped in a hug, her back facing her doom.

"Raph, you know I didnt mean it when I jump scared you with Mrs.Cuddles right??" said April, nervousness in her throat.

Raph never spoke, he just began diggin into her ribs. April restrained the laughter in her chest unfortunatetly a few giggles spilled out.

"Looks like a monster has come for you too O'neil, AND ITS ME THE TICKLE MONSTER"said Raph as he pinned April on the ground on her back.

April tried to squirm away but Raph was too strong. Raph blew raspberries into his victim's ribs and April shrieked.

"Rahahaph" giggled April.

"Yes April" Raph said in an innocent tone.

"Stohohop" whined April

"Nah" responded the turtle as he moved to her sides with pinches and pokes

April just had find a way out, and then it came to her

"Hehehey, Leheo is trhaha-tryhinhg to beat your scohore" said April

To her demise however Raph never budged.Raph moved his head over to her death spot ever, her tummy. He stopped to look at her face of desperation

"Waitwaitwaihahat, Raph Im sorry"she said nervously

Raph began to very slowly lower his head.

"Okokok, it was a mistake, please Raph, buddy, my dear brother I will simply die" pleaded tge human.

"I know, that's why I'ma do it"said Raph with evil smirk.

Raph began nibbling on her midriff,sayin nom every time.

It was so bad, April's laugh fell silent, she was flopping around like dying fish.She dug her heels into the ground and covered her red face.

Raph soon noticed tears falling from her hands and let off her.

"Ihihm gonna gehet you bahack" said April, giggling as the feeling took its time to calm down.

"Oh I know, how long do I have to hide"asked Raph.

"Zero seconds" said April as she let out a battle cry and pounced.

Soon the screams of Raph were heard, and they sounded worse than April's previous ones....yikes.

[blackjackkent]

So - we've reached the adamantine forge.

The molds we've found fit in the mold chamber but I do not have any adamantine so we'll have to keep looking for that.

Trotting on westward, we find the location of the quest item "Help the Spirit of the Amulet", which is in this pleasant looking place.

Everyone's pathfinding is struggling with getting through this area, which is full of little "lava balloons" which repeatedly get the Ready To Burst condition and then explode.

This fellow, which Hector recognized as a lava elemental, is wandering around the place, and he commented that it's probably why the lava is so volatile. So I'm guessing we have to kill it? Talking doesn't seem to be an option.

This fight turned out to be complicated by the fact that all of the lava explosions HEAL the elemental as long as it's in the lava. So after some significant singeing, the right approach seemed to be to kite it back OUT of the lava onto dry land where we could beat it up safely. (This also helped bc it let us use melee attacks, and Hector and Karlach beating the hell out of everything is kind of the majority of our damage output at present.)

Karlach got inspired for us defeating the elemental. :D

With the elemental dead, the lava calms down considerably; still super hot but much easier to walk around in without getting clipped.

At the center of the area is a locked adamantine chest with a DC of *20*. Yikes. Must be important stuff. Hector did his best but even his impressive dex score is not enough to make this happen, so it's time to bring in the big guns.

Poor Astarion has been sitting in camp probably bored out of his skull and snipping at Lae'zel and Wyll for the last however many days but we will put him to work now.

Tasty. He biffed the first attempt nevertheless but the second was a 31 which was more than sufficient. :P TY for your service, Astarion.

What's in this chest that is so difficult to unlock?

Yuh oh.

So. Based on what we read in the note we found, as well as the description, the name, and literally everything about its being somehow locked away here despite having previously been thrown in lava, I'm going to go ahead and say this is 1423425% cursed.

However, it also provides ki restoration which means it is literally tailor-made for Hector.

"I dunno about this, Hec," Karlach says warily, watching him eye the object sitting within the chest. "Things that have a mind 'a their own tend to...y'know, have a mind of their own."

"Oh, relax, darling," Astarion drawls lazily, lounging back on his heels, still basking in his moment of accomplishment. "What's the worst that could happen? If he goes insane, we have a pit of lava all prepared for him." He smirks at Hector. "There are worse things than a dramatic exit."

Hector ignores him, glances at Gale. "You're our magic expert. What do you think?"

Gale smiles crookedly. "Oh, I think it's a dreadful idea - but I'm just as curious as you are."

Hector hesitates...then reaches into the chest and lifts the amulet carefully in one hand.

Immediately, a soft, gleeful voice rings in his head, almost inarticulate with mirth.

"Thou hast come! Hee. Hee. Hee-HEE!"

Narrator: The amulet is heavy, but holds a subtle warmth, like it was left under the sun.

Narrator: Suddenly, the metal surges with heat. You feel great power and an overwhelming urge...to laugh.

Hector feels the sudden straining of his facial muscles, pulling into a maniacal smile, his eyes widening to show the whites as a desperate belly laugh begins forming in his chest. It's not tied to anything, he sees no humor, but the sudden urge feels like a tension release after everything he's been through and he makes a choking noise, a sudden strangled giggle.

The voice speaks again in his head, even more excited, even more full of mirth. "Ha! Canst thou endure?!"

And he very nearly gives over to it. Everything has been so tiring, so brutal and exhausting, everything since the nautiloid and even back before that, through his ascetic youth and isolated childhood, everything has always been austere and silent and serious and he need, he needs to laugh, to let loose the absolute hysteria building inside him--

Stop.

Some answering voice, perhaps the lingering remnants of all the masters who ever taught him at the monastery, perhaps his own self-control...something sees what is happening to it and knows it to be wrong.

[MONK][WISDOM] Quiet your mind. Let everything be still.

Narrator: You observe the urge to laugh from afar, letting it fade with each breath.

He feels himself trembling as the urge begins to leave him, the steadiness returning. The voice in his head swirls dizzily.

"Thou has done well!" it yelps excitedly. "For what is a laugh, if not one step towards madness?" It begins to giggle hysterically, and he feels the urge start to take hold of him again, shoves it down forcefully with a tight grip on the amulet that sends pain jolting through his knuckles. "Hee. Hee. Hee hee hee heeheehee. Thou art the One!" it announces, and there is a burst of light as a form erupts from the object into the air in front of him.

It's a human man and a monk by the looks of it - wearing very similar clothing to the simple outfit that Hector himself wears. "Return me! Take me home!" it urges, the words lost in a flurry of giggles. "And thou shalt glow with blessings!"

Hector stares at the phantasm in bewilderment. The urge to laugh, to give in to the enchantment, is still very real, and a great part of his mind is occupied with ignoring it enough to function. "Return you where? To whom?" he asks, his voice strangled and breathless.

"To my granddaughter!" the spirit says brightly. "Shirra Clarwen. Serves Ilmater, she doth! She waits in Wyrm's Crossing. Take me there, and thou shalt bathe in her golden gifts!"

Behind him, Hector is almost sure he can hear Astarion snigger, and the sound almost causes his control to break; he grits his teeth against the feeling.

"O! Thou shalt be blessed indeed!" the spirit announces, followed by a burst of giggling.

Hector swallows, forces out another set of words. "Are you a ghost? What happened to you?"

"A ghost?!" The spirit seems to find this, too, incredibly humorous. "Ha HA! I am sunlight on water, dew on grass. Sharrans broke my bo0dy. But my spirit, they could not. Well - not completely. Hee HEE! Thou shalt return me home! It is written!"

He's mad, Hector thinks distantly. But the desire to go home...he can understand that. He squints at the amulet cautiously, trying to bring whatever knowledge he can to bear on the question.

[INVESTIGATION] Examine the amulet.

Narrator: Etched on its face is an image of the dawning sun.

[RELIGION] Consider the inscribed image. What could it mean?

Narrator: You recognize this symbol - it belongs to those sworn to Lathander, god of dawn and renewal. Whatever madness this spirit suffers was inflicted by Lathander's enemies - followers of Shar. And this madness may flow into you.

"I shall walk with thee! I shall grant thee power! He HEE!"

[INSIGHT] Focus on this entity. What are its intentions?

Narrator: Beneath the rampant joy, you sense the monk's fear and sincerity. He doesn't wish to harm you - but that doesn't mean he won't.

Hector's fist closes around the amulet again. The worship of Lathander is not so far off from his own Selunite faith. This is the spirit of a man he could have considered a brother. And he wishes to go home.

"We'll take him home," he says hoarsely. He doesn't wear the amulet - not yet. He senses too much danger in that, and is not sure after the ordeal of the last few minutes that he is quite strong enough to handle it at present. But he puts it carefully into his pack. "We'll take you home."

Narrator: You feel a chuckle coming on. But it soon fades...

[stereax]

It’s early for off season trade predictions, but I’m nothing if not delusional.

Draisaitl to the Bruins for Ullmark, especially if the oilers don’t get past the second round.

Watching them play the Canucks, it’s very obvious that goaltending just isn’t up to par and it’s their Achilles heel in playoffs. Oilers are going to have to give up a big name to get a good goal tender and Draisaitl only has one year left on his contract after this season.

DAMN. That's big.

I'll be honest, I think that's a massive overpay by Edmonton. They'd only do that if Draisaitl explicitly told them he's not re-signing with the Oilers.

Ullmark's on a decent contract, yes, but given Swayman's imminent extension, a lot of players might find themselves priced out of Boston. I've heard DeBrusk is going to UFA and that Boston is going to have to sell low on Ullmark because they simply can't afford to keep everyone. Plus, there was a rumor that Ullmark was going to LA for Pierre-Luc Debois, but that didn't end up working because Ullmark refused to waive his no trade clause. The rumor is that the going rate for Ullmark won't even be a first-round pick, it'll be a second/third and a prospect.

I don't think Edmonton has better assets than, say, New Jersey or Toronto, in any trade of that style, barring a massive star swap a la Draisaitl or Marner which would be a massive overpay. Additionally, Skinner is definitely mid, but he's not bad enough that he needs to be moved off immediately. The worse goalie contract right now is the Campbell one. That's a yikes.

If I were betting, I'd say Edmonton is going to try to land a goaltender in the offseason, for sure, but I don't think they'll be able to secure Ullmark.

[showfallmediamaintenance]

[Video transcript begin.]

[A blur, as someone hastily shoves the device into their pocket, the person turns to the left, revealing someone in a bloodied white dress shirt and black pants, their brown hair is slightly above shoulder length. Very obviously dressed up as Edgar. The cosplay is accented by a foam crowbar. They’re trying to look confident, but their eyes betray their anxiety.]

?: Hi! Sorry if this is weird, but… are you the guy who played Edgar in The Mechanic’s Lament?

[Voice registered. Awaiting name.]

?: Yes, I am! Why?

[Voice identified: Edgar Pression.]

?: I um… I’m a really big fan, and… Wait, sorry. I’m Ellie. I should’ve probably done that first. Or… wait, no. 

[Name registered, applying…]

E: Well, it’s nice to meet you, Ellie. I’m Edgar, as you probably already know.

[Edgar brings his right hand up, metal glinting, as he does so, Ellie holds out their left hand, they shake hands. Ellie brings their hand down and shoves it into their pocket, bouncing back and forth on their heels.]

El: I’m sorry, I’m already messing this up.

E: Don’t worry about it, I don’t have anything going on, take your time. 

[Ellie turns back to the end of the aisle, where two people appear to be leaning in, wearing cosplays related to the one Ellie is wearing. They seem to be watching the interaction. They both give them reassuring gestures, and smile. Ellie turns back to face Edgar.]

E: I have to say, I really love your cosplay! If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you just walked right out of the show itself. The blood stains are exactly where I remember them being on my original costume!

[Their eyes light up, and the tension in their shoulders loosens. Their expression changes from nervous to proud within seconds.]

El: Thank you! I worked really hard on it, that really means a lot to me. 

[Ellie takes a deep breath, and makes eye contact with Edgar.]

El: Can you sign something for me? And uh… maybe answer a few questions…?

E: Of course! Shoot!

El: [Holding out a pen and their crowbar prop.] First question, what was your favourite part of working on the shows? 

E: [While signing the crowbar.] Oh, easy. The environment. It was really friendly! But, I wouldn’t recommend working with such a big company if you haven’t done anything smaller before. It can be really intimidating. When I got there for the first time, I’ll admit, I was pretty scared. 

[He hands the prop back, and Ellie smiles at it, holding onto it with both hands.]

El: Okay, so start small if you’re looking into acting?

E: Definitely. Build up to bigger companies bit by bit, that’s my advice. But, don’t take it as a guideline. Do what you want.

El: Got it! Uh, question two, do you have a favourite scene in The Mechanic’s Lament?

[Edgar pauses for a second.]

E: It’s hard to choose, really. But… if I had to pick one, I’d say the apple scene. 

El: Any particular reason why? 

E: It was a very creative concept for a scene, as well as fun to do.

El: That makes sense, yeah. It looked so realistic! One of my friends almost threw up while watching!  

E: Oh, yikes. Next time you see them, tell your friend that I’m very sorry about that. 

El: I will, she was okay, though. Don’t worry. [A short pause.] Question three! Are you close with any of the other actors? 

E: [Chuckling.] Yep! I’m pretty close with a lot of them! Katherine and I are actually together outside of the show. 

[Ellie’s eyebrows raise slightly.]

El: Dang, did you start dating before or after the show? If that’s not too personal, I mean.

E: I don’t mind sharing. We got together a little before the show. Still going strong!

El: That’s really neat! Sorry for being surprised, I just didn’t expect that. 

E: People never do, but it's fine, don’t even worry about it.

El: I have a few more questions for you, uh… so, do you have any opinions on how Stacy and Katherine have been characterised by the fandom?

E: Hm… That’s a tough one. I definitely think they should give them more depth with how they write them. There was one work that wrote them very well, I enjoyed reading it quite a lot. It was… hm. What was it?

[He pauses for 7 seconds, likely attempting to recall the title.]

E: Oh! Right! It was titled ‘Small Talk.’ I forget the author, but… it was quite well done. 

[Ellie freezes, eyes widening. Their mouth opens slightly, they don’t say anything for a few seconds.]

El: [Quietly.] I wrote that one.

E: You did? Well, incredible work, Ellie. It’s a favourite of mine. You should consider going into writing!

El: It is? Thank you so much!

E: You really are very skilled, I’m not kidding. 

[They beam at Edgar, letting go of the crowbar prop and shaking their free hand.] 

El: [Clearing their throat.] Okay, last question, is wrenchtrap canon? 

[Edgar laughs for a second. The smile on his face somehow audible in his words.]

E: Well, it’s up to audience interpretation, really.

[Ellie slaps their free hand over their mouth, a small squeak making it through the barrier, one of the two people from around the corner screams. It’s cut off abruptly.]

El: I– Thank you so much for your time, Edgar! It was nice meeting you!

[They turn to leave.]

E: It was wonderful talking to you, Ellie. Have a great rest of your day!

[Ellie sprints away to their friends around the corner, they immediately begin loudly talking about the information given to them.]

E: [Sighing.] Jeez, that was… exhausting. 

[Transcript end.]

[miss-ingno]

Well, since you gave me permission to indulge myself with mor asks, how about 4, 5, 6, 13, 16, and 32? Feel free to pick and choose if that's too many! You just have a lot of really interesting WIPs, so sue me...

4 - Sweet Revenge

The plotty sequel to In The Middle Of The Night, my vampire canon AU! As the summary for that series gives away, it features the Stealth Lesbians:

Part 1: The Rescue of Li Qian Part 2: The Rampage of Wang Yike Part 3: ??? Part 4: Profit

shh, I'm hilarious, don't pop my bubble 😂

It involves plenty of ZYL sleuthing, and Shen Wei being an overprotective stalker! Also, more flock leader!Shen Wei and fledgling!Li Qian with accompanying worldbuilding :3

5 - In Light Of Stolen Memories

Ohhh, you're gonna like this one, it's deliciously angsty! :3

Kid!ZYL finds a dusty old lantern in the SID's storage and ends up lighting it by accident—and receiving Kunlun's memories of the YOHE era, from when he saved a young Heipaoshi to when he sacrificed himself to light the Guardian Lantern.

Fast forward to canon times, Zhao Yunlan runs into Shen Wei and promptly recognizes him as his Shen Wei. Except... It's not his Shen Wei, is it? It's Kunlun's. Not helped by the fact that Shen Wei recognizes him as Kunlun, when he's not, he's just an imposter. A wannabe Kunlun.

It's Weilan trying to figure out how to build a relationship with the shadow of Kunlun hovering over them. Lots of emotional h/c ;)

6- Soulbond [redacted]

Hmmm, trying to figure out how much to say without giving away the reason for the [redacted]. Let's say it's inspired by a prompt from a certain someone and I'm hoping to write this for them as a gift!

Weilan end up soulbonded and have to figure out how their new abilities and limitations ;) Post-canon fix-it.

13 - Arranged Marriage Weilan

The big longfic of doom OTL. Modern Canon AU in which Dixingren are widely known and there are rising tensions between Dixing and Haixing. Afraid war might break out between them, Heipaoshi offers to marry a Haixingren to reinforce the Treaty. Since he's Director Zhao's son, Zhao Yunlan is the ideal candidate (since HPS specified he wanted a male spouse).

Problem is, Zhao Yunlan is head over heels for Shen Wei, an unassuming paper pusher he met at a government networking party.

Shenanigans ensue in which Shen Wei tries and fails to find alone time with Zhao Yunlan while Heipaoshi is courting him to tell him his secret identity. Also there's some plot with assassins and the like.

It's gonna be a two-parter I probably won't ever finish but by GOD am I gonna write and post the first part (which ends on the wedding night) next year at the latest >:( I've been fiddling with the first 20k I have for over 2 years now, this cannot continue!!

16 - Warlord Kunlun

This is a historical AU in which Kunlun is a roaming alpha warlord, who just defeated Zei Qiu and is claiming everything that belong to the traitorous chief as his war spoils - including the omega twins. Shen Wei pledges himself to Kunlun's service to protect his people (not as a sex slave, but everyone is aware of the bride potential), and then Kunwei fall grossly in love.

32 - Weilan case fic

In which Shen Wei is wrongfully accused of A Crime and the SID has to work against the police to prove his innocence. Meanwhile Shen Wei pretends to be all Harmless (TM) stuck in his jail cell.

[pridelessdaydreamer]

PLOTTER / SHIPPER

taken from: nat's linoan!

tagging: flutters my lashes like a funny lil guy :eye::sparkles:

1. CONNECTIONS

write about how our muses could connect with each other! ex. what does your muse like to do that other people would be involved in? do they have interests that other people might share?

Linhardt is a Black Eagle, and one native to Fódlan. Any who decide to study the politics of the continent would easily stumble upon his house, and connections can be drawn from there (accurate or otherwise).

She is a frequenter of the library though, even if she's most often found there late at night. Aside from her chronic reading, she also likes to fish! Not competitively though. She's not that competitive.

If you can't find them in class, the library, or at the Fishing Grounds though, just wander around the monastery a bit—they're probably asleep underneath a tree somewhere. Or in their room asleep, in which case, good luck finding them.

2. PLATONIC

write about your muse and their concept of friendship. ex. how is your muse like with friends? do they make friends easily or do they find it difficult to connect with others?

Friendship for Lin is... interesting, to say the least. They'll regard you much the same as they would any other person, but perhaps with slightly less rudeness/sass (unless you're really close, then it's worse *cough cough* CASPAR *cough cough*). The chance of summoning them with the click of your heels increases by 0.5%, so that's also a neat bonus! Really, the big thing is that they'll consciously worry about you now (when they think it's necessary to worry, otherwise, you're on your own).

The thing is, once you actually manage to pin him down, so long as you aren't asking him to do work all the time, you'd be pretty alright in his book! The threshold for 'friendship' though is rather hard to pin down—one day you're acquaintances and the next you're friends. It's not really easy to draw the line.

I can't say she makes friends easily considering she... doesn't exactly try, to be quite frank (it's part of the reason the previous bullet is so nebulous). She'd be completely content being alone forever (minus that one hamster), and she doesn't really rely on others that much except to do work she'd rather not do! Actively seeking out a friend isn't really something she does. I can't say she struggles either though—there is simply no effort made at all. Alas.

3. ANTAGONISTIC

write about your muse and the conflicts they have with other people. ex: who are they on bad terms with? what kind of people do they not get along well with? how do they act around people they don’t like?

Hubert. Also Ferdinand. Edelgard to an extent. Caspar sometimes (it's a best friends thing) /j. Yeah. Yeah.

To elaborate, anybody who expects her to put in more than the minimum amount of effort gotta be joking fr! It's not that bad if it's a misunderstanding, but if you try to force it? Yikes. (Edelgard ain't that bad fr cuz she knows when to quit! Also when to appeal. She's cool ong)

Admittedly, antagonism for Linhardt is basically the same as their normal behavior, just snarkier. More witty rebuttals and sharp comments—this man can never be anything but blunt! They're already very likely to just walk away from a conversation, but if they don't like you? Ohoho!

Won't lose sleep over it though. That's a bit too much.

4. ROMANTIC

write about your muse and their relationship with romance. ex. are they searching for love or not interested in it in the slightest? what’s their dating history like? how do they act around crushes? how would they treat their partner if they were in a relationship?

Okay 'cause this is hilarious when the muse is aromantic gwahaha!

This is an aroace lil guy—completely disinterested in romance for romance's sake (because someone tell me how he tells how many different girls they're gonna have kids together in his A-supports? Also in basically every instance it's got something to do with crests and studying them. He's a bit insane).

Their dating history is completely blank. There is actually nothing to see here.

Similarly, there are no crushes for her to act different around! This one is fairly normal (<- this post was brought to you by the Aspec Gang)

As for how he'd treat his partner if he was dating—the same way he would act if they were friends? lol? Literally nothing has changed in his mind except that there might be kisses or something. (Is there a book he can read somewhere on this? Probably.)

Oh well she's probably gonna get married off for political purposes anyway. (This post was brought to you by the Noble Clique.)

[launching-a-thousand-ships]

Kurt Glee Rewatch: Theatricality

We deserved more Kurt singing in Gaga songs, just saying.

So, obvs I love Carol but I do find this scene kinda weird? She knows how difficult it was for Finn when she first started dating Burt so why didn’t she have a private convo with him first? Could’ve given him time to process. But then, that’s not entertaining TV.

Also, v small note, but when Kurt mentions the tuna crudite, Burt corrects himself to use the correct term. V subtle change from before, when he wouldn’t really bother (the Maria bonnet before lol). Just thought I’d point it out. He’s already trying...

And why does a house with 2 (and a half) bathrooms not have another room? There are more bathrooms than bedrooms lol.

Def feel bad for Finn here, prob could’ve handled it better. Also, don’t see Kurt as really crushing on Finn at this point? More just excited, trying to make things work. Also def blinded by the thought of getting to redecorate lol.

Theatricality and Funk were switched when aired so timeline is of Vocal Adrenaline is weird but... oh well.

How dare VA do Gaga when that is his identity (and yet he only got to do 2 Gaga songs, blasphemy)

This always makes me think of the story of Chris Colfer meeting Lady Gaga and saying ‘Nobody’s talented but you’ lol

Love Kurt’s reaction to the assignment. Hasn’t been this hype since Madonna.

Kinda side-tangent but oof, Finn, casual homophobia is showing.

First off, he says they’re always doing what the girls want to do?? No?? They do what Will wants. Maybe he means Madonna but a) that was Will inspired by Sue and b) that was bc the guys were being sexist asses.

I do like the idea of bringing in different types of theatricality but would be interesting to have the whole club do both kinds, maybe do Gaga one week, Kiss the next. And oof, the way Finn says ‘except for Kurt’ here bc of all the annoyance he has at the situation... yikes. Trouble ahead.

aw, Kurt and Tina allowed to be friends. Enjoy it while you can, not much time left.

Not gonna lie... not a huge fan of Kurt’s outfit? Maybe it’s the wig giving rococo vibes? Idk, fits with his usual fashion of being hella covered up, but eh. Heels are iconic tho

And damn, the way he talks back to the jocks. And how he tries to sorta backtrack, to just defending Tina. Prob less confident when it comes to just defending himself.

It was made as a big deal in s2, like Kurt wouldn’t have stood up for himself witout Blaine’s courage text but Kurt’s been calling them out all along?? Or maybe by s2 he was more beaten down and unwilling to do anything.

Also, kudos to Azimio for knowing what crepe paper is.

I cannot even with this number. I mean, we get Kurt, Santana, Mercedes, Tina(!) singing lead and freaking rocking it! Wish they got to sing together more often.

And the dance and Kurt getting to use his lower register and just. Lowkey better than numerous competition performances. I love this so much.

Wtf is this reaction to one of the best songs they’ve ever done? Esp you Matt, We know nothing about you but I expected better. Ugh, finn and puck complained about not wanting to perform gaga, fine, but you can’t even support your friends and appreciate a freaking amazing number???

And ofc when the boys perform these guys are all hella into it. Bc they support their friends and are able to appreciate a good performance. Oof.

Jeez, Tina and Kurt are going through it this ep. Why is no one else getting grief? Is it bc the other girls are cheerios? What about Rachel and Mercedes? The lack of adult supervision in this school is astounding.

This look of pure derision Kurt throws Finn... why I think the crush is practically gone at this point oof.

Kurt has spent so damn long working to accept himself, to build up some confidence to be who he is. And esp now that he has acceptance from his dad, the only opnion he cares about, ofc Kurt has no desire to ‘blend in’. 

“It’s just a moist towelette!”

I mean, I was also struggling with Finn trying to wipe off make-up with a dry paper towel like dude. And Kurt prob wants to just comfortably hang out with another guy, but Finn freaks the fuck out. Back in Ballad they hung out pretty closely and Finn never said anything and legit hasn’t called Kurt out on any of it yet. Kurt had been very intense before, but here Kurt is being casual about things.

Kurt kicking the chair slays me. He learned it from Finn. 

Omg this room. Like, lowkey, I’d love to have a room like that, but also.

We saw Kurt in his Mellencamp phase. We know he knows how to ‘butch’ things up if he needs to. Also, this is nothing like any of his past aesthetics and nothing we ever see again?? His style is very modern, usually more sleek and monochrome. I feel like this room was made way more extra to incite the argument cuz like. Wow. I do appreciate the privacy partition, Kurt trying so hard.

Omg this scene. How Kurt was really sincere in trying to make something finn would like. And then the turn around to sadness, embarrassment, regret. Legit a million emotions on his face.

The way Finn is shocked when Kurt starts shouting. Lowkey we don’t see Kurt shout often, normally he goes for cutting remarks etc. Kurt is def in defensive mode.

And when Finn starts using the f-slur like damn. And how Kurt barely reacts to it bc he’s used to the word being used against him (tho never before by Finn) and he prob still feels guilt about the crush and about the room oof.

Then Burt Hummel. Omg. I love how he calls Finn out like ‘you weren’t talking about the blanket, you meant it towards Kurt’ bc yes.

And Kurt jumps to Finn’s defense bc he’s used to being bullied. He’s upset it’s from Finn, but it’s not super out of the ordinary

And Burt calls Finn out like, you won’t use the n-word, the r-word, but you’re totally fine using that slur? 

And how Burt brings it back bc he was the same when he was a kid. Kurt being gay prob had Burt thinking back on all the crap he’d say with his friends and he has lots of guilt over it.

And how Burt says he thought Finn was this ‘new generation of man’ and honestly, that makes me so upset that we barely see anymore Kurt and Finn friendship after this until like. Furt. And after that, even less. And they lowkey don’t give Kurt any male friends (until Elliot, which is nice but ofc he’s also gay).

After all this, and the stupid ‘predatory gay’ trope they gave Kurt earlier, it would be cool to see Kurt getting to be friends with straight guys without it being a big deal ugh. I’ll rant more in Duets tho.

I do think the last scene was when Kurt’s crush officially died. Finn was no different than every other bully he’d dealt with. At least he’s eventually able to forgive him and accept him as a brother tho.

“My balls keep falling off” “I’ve been there” this line kills me.

Kurt’s reaction to every bully: “go ahead, hit me” like boi

Also, I love the quiet ‘oh my god...’ when he sees Finn bc. Ya. Same. Love the speech, and kinda love that even tho Finn is giving this intense speech, he doesn’t clarify ‘my brother’ or ‘my friend’ bc he doesn’t care what the others think. This is just about making it right with Kurt.

And Will appears after this and... no check in with Kurt. Doesn’t go after Karofsky and Azimio bc they were about to beat a kid up. Like... dude. 

This is why I rewatch omg. Kurt pets Finn’s shoulder, and when Finn does it back Kurt immediately waves him off like ‘don’t touch the costume’. Lol.

Also, how tf did Finn make this costume.

[allthemusic]

Week ending: 17th May

Well, it's a first for this project - our first double A-side, where the record company wanted to promote both tracks on a record evenly, rather than having an A-side and a less official B-side. It's a practice so intimately tied to the reality of playing music on records, but somehow I actually associate it a bit more with 90s bands like Oasis, and even early 00s bands, who were definitely releasing on CD at that point. Nowadays, streaming's kind of killed off the practice, but it's cool to see it beginning in the UK top 10, anyway.

Lost John - Lonnie Donegan (double A-side, peaked at Number 2)

I think I'm going to cover double A-sides separately, since they are separate songs, at the end of the day. So we get two Lonnie numbers today, the first of which is this, Long John.

I was struck back with Rock Island Line by the peculiar nature of Lonnie's sound, a mix of American blues and folk music, and a sort of scrappy, DIY attitude and low-budget production that mostly involved Lonnie just launching himself into the song. It's a song that inspired early Merseybeat artists, and you can absolutely hear it in a few of Lonnie's vocal moments.

The song is clearly a blues song, and very American, all about a man hitching a ride on top of a train, that most American of fixations. You couldn't get this many romantic songs about riding the rails in the UK, we're just not big enough of a country for the journey to be that epic. Anyway, that's what Lost John, our protagonist does, which launches us into a chorus where Lonnie's band all seem to join in, all about how John's long, long, long gone.

I love how much fun they all sound like they're having, here and in the intro, as Lonnie introduces the song. I also like the sort of fluidity of the lyrics, because they sometimes seem to sing long, long, long gone and sometimes long, long, long John. Or maybe I'm hearing things? You get a few questionable moments where Lonnie's clearly putting on a very specific American accent for the bit, but generally this bit of it, with all the vocal interjections, is kinda fun.

Our story then gets more mysterious as we learn that lost John came into a country woman's house / Sat down there as quiet, just as quiet as a mouse. We have no idea who this woman is, or why John's so meek and quiet in her house, but she implores him to be my friend / Be my friend up until the end. She even offers to get him a beer fetched up, except he says he can't stay for beer, since The cops is on my trail and-a soon be here. Yikes! Our John, it seems, is on the run!

And then we end with bit where John makes himself a pair of shoes with heels on both ends, so as to leave confusing tracks for the cops to trace. It doesn't work, and he ends up arrested, I think, but then gets out again? It's quite a confusing ending, to be honest, but I like the drama of it all.

I also like the bit at the end about how If anybody asks you / Who sung this song / Tell 'em Lonnie Donegan / Been 'ere and gone. It's completely out of left field, and just makes me smile. Something about Lonnie giving himself a little shoutout at the end, making himself out to be a bit of a rebel, too - funny!

The whole thing's got a bit of a performatively American feel to it, and there's something decidedly odd about that. Not in a bad way, but Lonnie's as Scottish as they come, and you hear precisely none of that in this. If you asked me where the artist of this song was from and I didn't know, I'd definitely not have gone with Glasgow. And yet, it doesn't feel entirely authentic and American, either - or perhaps that's me making up stuff.

It's terribly good fun, either way, and you absolutely can hear the influence on some early Beatles tracks.

Stewball - Lonnie Donegan (double A-side, 2)

I thought that the title of this track was interesting, but boy howdy, did it outdo all expectations!

The first thing you need to know is that Stewball is a horse. This is very much a song about a racehorse. In fact, it's a song about a real British racehorse from the 18th century, originally named Skewball. The skewbald Skewball's unexpected victory in Kildare over a grey mare probably owned by the Protestant landowner Ralph Gore, whose family had arrived in Cromwell's invasion of Ireland, apparently occasioned a great deal of excitement, enough for it to be turned into a broadside ballad, which was a sort of early way of disseminating song lyrics on sheets of paper, back in the early days of the printing press.

The British version of the song is thus called Skewball, and features the race, still set in Ireland, incljuding a section where Skewball apparently talks to his jockey? Unfortunately, that version is not the one that made it to America, where the song was popularised among black slaves in the southern US. The horse's name changed to Stewball, and the setting was changed, as in this verison, to various American locations. The version Lonnie's picked up is thus set in Dallas, with Stewball having been born in California, and in it Stewball resolutely does not speak. Instead, it's mostly a song about Lonnie exhorting his listeners to bet on Stewball / And you might win.

It's a version of the song that has a long, mostly African-American history, having been recorded particularly notably by Lead Belly, though Woodie Guthrie also did do a version, and John and Alan Lomax recorded various versions, too. Still, it's interested that Lonnie, from Scotland - where there's technically a native version of the song - would instead go the American route, including another questionable American accent that this time I'm much happier pinning down as a "black" accent that Lonnie is putting on. So I'm not a massive fan of that, but the song is a banger.

I should also mention that the music side of this is also great - it's frenetically paced, with this frantically-strummed guitar backing, and Lonnie attacks each line with an admirable amount of verve, even as the song gets faster and faster. He's even got some very amenable backing singers to shout out these little call-and-response bits, which again, let me stress, is very much a feature taken from black American folk music. It gives the whole thing a sort of informal, rowdy atmosphere, like you've just wandered into a jam session gone slightly off the rails.

The tune for this apparently inspired the tune for John Lennon's Merry Xmas (War Is Over), which I personally can't really hear, but then again, I haven't heard Merry Xmas in at least 6 months, and I have no great desire to re-listen just to check. So consider that your homework, I guess?

I'll Be Home - Pat Boone (1)

Oh, wow, this is a change of pace, quite literally. After the giddy speed of Lonnie, this feels somnolent and luxuriously paced, almost like a lullaby! Originally by the African-American doo-wop group the Flamingos, it's nonetheless under Pat Boone that this song made it big in the UK - spot a pattern this week?

The song's a return to a classic theme, lovers separated for some reason. Andmuch like in half the songs all the way back in 1952, I think the reason might be that Pat's been drafted for military service? Lines like I'll be home, my darling / Please wait for me leave things ambiguous, but we also learn that Pat's writing his love a letter, so he is presumably quite far away, and we also get that line about how he's made up his mind to wait until I'll be home to start serving you. Which... yeah, I don't know, in what other context would you use the word "serving" there? Unless it's a pun on the idea of him "serving" in the army, there's so many other words that would feel more natural.

The timing kind of adds up, too - we're in the very first days of the Vietnam War, and only three years out from the end of the Korean War, so there's a lot of young American men suddenly finding themselves separated from their lovers?

Anyway, there's some nice touches either way, even if that isn't what the song's doing, from the little snapshot of 1950s dating as Pat sings about how At the corner drugstore / Each Saturday we would meet and about how I'd walk you home in the moonlight - d'awww - to the triplet piano chords underneath, which are just that little bit rock and roll inflected, to the spoken word segment in the middle, which is cheesy, but vintage enough to just about get away with it and maintain its charm. And finally, there's the backing singers, who sing gently thoughout the whole thing, but get some genuinely gorgeous harmonies right at the end.

Yeah, I really expected to dislike this song, but actually it's grown on me a lot as I've listened? Unexpectedly lovely.

Oh, this is a good batch of songs. I particularly appreciated the rabbit-holes they all sent me down, and the fact that they were all also good songs in their own right. Plus, we've got our first double A-side, which feels like a milestone. But yeah, give all of these a listen, if you've got a few minutes spare!

Favourite song of the bunch: Stewball

[god-i-love-my-ocs]

MONTANA!!!!!!!

Name: Montana Danielle Oh

Age: 25

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Bicurious

Favorite color: White

Physical Attributes: Tall, lanky; strong and muscular even still. About 5’7” or so. (Rough estimate—hasn’t been to the doctor in a very long time.) Black, straight hair, goes down to her mid-back or so, cuts it herself (sometimes choppy). Bangs, dyes it purple (also does herself! What a DIY girlie :] ^^ talking about mass murderer) Very big eyes, stares quite often (doesn’t do it on purpose, but does say it makes her appear more normal [no it doesn’t]) Smaller nose, mole on the side of her right eye, large-ish mouth. Creepy ass smile lowkey. 

Favorite Attire: LOVES flow-y dresses! Light linens, usually some that are somewhat opaque. Floral patterns are great, but also doesn’t mind the basics. Formal wear is another love for her—I’m talking cute button-ups with bows, pleated skirts, etc. Has the appearance of a doll sometimes, with how ornately she dresses. Big fan of lace and tights, as well as heels and Mary Janes. Very muted colors, not a huge fan of anything vibrant or hues that catch your attention. 

Personality: Oh lord. Sadistic, manipulative, and cunning. Yikes! What more can I say? She plays off being normal to not attract suspicion and attention, and her friends just play it off as she’s an extremely nervous person, on account of her childhood. She reads people easily, something she’s been good at since preschool. Lots of what she does is for her own gain, whether it be to appear ordinary or for her own entertainment. She has a calm composure, and speaks eloquently, conviction and confidence on point. 

Backstory: Montana grew up in an extremely abusive household, and because of this, she can hardly remember her childhood. Though, she does remember a girl she loved. Unfortunately, however, the girl’s parents kept her away from Montana’s family, as they knew how abusive they were, and did not want to scare their child. It left Montana with a hole in her heart—the only person who loved her was forced away from her. Montana has refused to accept her romance as anything queer since. Growing up, she hated children, even if she was still a child in some capacity. She always looked down on them, thinking of them as lesser beings. Seeing and experiencing the terrible things her and her siblings had to go through, she learned “the horrors of the human race,” in her words. She could not and will not let children live in a world where their corrupted selves will make more of their corrupted selves, and the cycle continues. What does she do, then? Why, child murder, of course! She hates those little shits. Hates their guts, with their corrupted minds and rudeness and idiocracy. She’s always isolated herself in school, kept herself busy with her sketchbook and never said a word. Fortunately, she faced no bullying in school, since everyone was… too scared to approach her. It wasn’t until she was 18 when she joined the military on a whim. She got a kick out of it—her parents wanted her to be something successful, something that would put their name on the map. If it was something they disapproved of, thank goodness. Besides, she liked the guns and weaponry that came with it. Training wasn’t hard for her, and messing with people was easy. At one point she convinced a soldier to kill himself, and when her higher-ups questioned everybody, she twisted the story so well no suspicion was cast upon her (along with keeping silent, of course). After serving for four years, she returned, and with a vengeance. At the ripe age of 22 years old, she started kidnapping, torturing, and murdering children. She’s not stopping until she’s personally satisfied, to make up for how horrible her treatment was in the past. Met Sako in the military, and was awed by her kick-ass attitude and standoffish demeanor. Her introduction to the group started ever since.

Likes:

Drawing

Child murder… obviously.

Weaponry of any kind

Engineering

Military

Hurting others

Dolls

Dislikes:

Children (Who could have seen that coming!)

Stains, being dirty

Families

Squid

Extra/Notes:

Korean! :]

Voice is extremely unnerving. High pitched and sweet, coupled with her stare, it can really make a person sweat. 

Has always had a fascination with machinery and weaponry. Her favorite part of history projects were during war units, and she could ramble about their technology. Has a very extensive knowledge on warfare.