#just like the bridge is synonym for dreaming Idk why

[her-canine-teeth]

sugar water by flower face

[tothedarkdarkseas]

Hi, I just want to say that I adore your characterizations and your interpretation on the 2Doc dynamic — it’s refreshing to say the least, lol. Idk, I’m a sucker for bleak, unhealthy relationships. I’m not sure if you’ve ever been asked this, but I was wondering how do you address the criticisms of 2Doc as a ship, or problematic ships/characters in general? As someone who is involved in a few ships that some would deem as ‘problematic’, I find it difficult to fully articulate my stance on shipping as a concept. Of course I don’t think shipping is synonymous with believing the characters could realistically be in a healthy, productive relationship, but I still find it hard to address the (often valid) criticisms of the ships I like without fear of it verging on romanticization of an abusive or toxic relationship. Anyway, love your stuff and hope you’re doing well! ❤️

Thank you so much for your incredibly kind message! That means so much to me, thank you. And you’re not alone, I too am a sucker for bleakness! This got a bit long so it’ll be behind a cut!

This is an interesting question, and one that I fear has an unsatisfying answer. When I think back on the ships I’ve had strong feelings for, there are a few I’d call uncontroversial, but most often I am interested in human drama; it isn’t so much an obsession over the story being “dark,” but the complexity and conflict that comes from two people having problems, which they may or may not overcome. And there arises the issue: there’s a marked difference between a relationship being problematic, and being problematic. 2Doc is, in fairness, both, and I just try to steer it toward the former.

To be frank with you, the fandom has been fractured for a very long time, and I’ve always felt a bit alienated from both the glorifying of abuse, and from the “wholesome” excuses that arose counter to it. (I don’t try to position myself as an authority or very universal on this, so I apologize in advance, and hope other fans understand that we’re coming from similar places and simply have different paths there.) I think if you look through 2Doc discussions of the past few years, you’ll see a lot of the same talking points about how it was problematic but they’ve since healed, or that it is a narrative of growth and forgiveness, or a similar approach of acknowledging toxic history but refuting that their content is at all toxic. I completely understand why this is the popular argument, but it isn’t the one that resonates with me. They’re not wrong for saying it-- this is fandom, therefore authors are crafting their own narrative, that’s sort of the point of doing this, but-- do I think my narrative is about forgiveness? Not really, no. Do I think it is fair, then, to categorize it with the abuse porn which delights in removing Stu’s autonomy? No, I don’t agree that’s fair either.

I respect those who like to create and consume happier stories, but speaking purely for myself, I think you run a risk when you choose to present an unhealthy relationship as “fixed,” or navigate around valid criticism by saying they’re all better now, or worse, arguing it down. Despite good intentions, it minimizes the longterm damage that a power imbalance like this does, it disregards the responsibility of one or both parties to actually live with consequences for their actions even if those consequences are only interpersonal, and most frustrating and damning to me, it denies Stuart the right to be angry, vindictive, or hurt in a way that does not flatter the romantic tragedy of trauma. I do know that this is harsh, though. I understand that isn’t the intention, and I know it comes from a place of loving the idea of this kind-hearted martyr figure-- but idealizing forgiveness no matter the toll is not a healthy mindset and I don’t see it as fair to Stuart. I do think that in the real world people understand the dangers of guilting victims with this mindset, but this is fiction, and it’s nice to dream up a story of tilling the dead flowers from the soil and tending to it, nourishing it, and growing something beautiful from it. I completely get that, and I don’t fault people for it. It just isn’t what I’m writing for, and so this conversation never really satisfies me.

For me, I find it best not to circle around or try to disprove these points, but rather to meet them. Yes, we agree it is not an aspirational relationship or one the characters should wisely pursue. I think a critical fan reading my stories and attacking the relationship’s portrayal as unhealthy would be kind of a moot point, because I’m not presenting it as anything else-- but it is my hope that the characters are compelling and not merely an edgy, ghoulish spectacle. There are moments in my Sad Nonsequential Extended Universe where they banter playfully and where they share an intimacy that is (to their chagrin) romantic in its singularity, but at no point is the relationship whole, at no point is Murdoc apologetic in a way that Stuart is obligated to forgive. Speaking only for myself, that is the joy of writing, and that is what I come back to these characters for. I feel fulfilled by the unfulfillment, and I feel it is entirely possible to tell a story about cruelty and remorse without chaining either character to a leaden ball of either redemption or sainthood. And-- and this is the big and-- I think it’s possible to do this without reveling in trauma either.

There is a difference between appreciating human folly, codependence, and resentment as ever-present cracks in a foundation, and glorifying, romanticizing, or fetishizing a character’s lack of agency or suffering. It has been hurtful, at times, to feel there is no distinction made between bleakness in service of a story and abuse simply for its own sake.

It doesn’t thrill me to read Stuart as powerless against Murdoc, a pretty and broken thing too weak to escape, and it doesn’t thrill me to read Stuart as utterly benevolent to Murdoc, existing only as a bridge Murdoc may walk across to get to the next stage of his own story. I don’t think Murdoc wants Stuart to be that, either. I don’t think they could ever be wrapped up in each other for so long if he thought so little of him. And truth be told, I can acknowledge that this is now my narrative running away with me, this is something I’m choosing for them based on a characterization and history that doesn’t really exist, and for that reason I can’t fault anyone for finding the argument less than compelling. I can also acknowledge that this sounds a bit grand for a bunch of oneshots about bad sex and substance abuse, so, er, I’m sorry for that too.

Here’s where the unsatisfying bit comes in, about writing and discussing flawed characters without excusing or admiring their faults: I just think it’s something you know. If you ask a baker to tell you when you’ll know the dough is the right consistency, they may suggest you compare it to the softest part of your thigh, but they’ll amend that they don’t really think in those terms: they just know it when they see it. The best I can offer is that I find candor to be essential in conversation, and I think it’s a good idea to worry less about disagreeing than effectively communicating your interest in weighty storytelling. I think being able to take a step back from the impulse of defensiveness, knowing that you are a respectful and empathetic person, knowing that you have these concerns about romanticization and about invalidating fair concerns, is the absolute best thing you can do. Talking is not about winning! I hope this response was helpful at all! Thank you for your question!

[halfnakedmenfightingforabelt]

Absolute fucking unit (Drew McIntyre x Reader)

I was shocked to see that there aren’t many Drew McIntyre Fanfictions so I decided to write one myself. Note that this will be at most fluff, because I feel really uncomfortable writing smut.

Summary: You are head over heels for the scottish giant. Unfortunetaly, your death sworn enemy, Sasha Banks, also seemed to take a liking to him.

A/N: I know Sasha has a boyfriend but let’s just pretend she doesn’t. We’re already pretending a lot when we read this. (If you like Sasha then you shouldn’t read this, because I really really really dislike her. Don’t @ me)

It was just before RAW, when catering was completely stacked. You were sitting in the corner at a table for two people, doing your best to not be noticed and hoping that nobody would talk to you. Except for one man, Drew McIntyre. How you wished he would talk to you. It’s not like the two of you were strangers though. You were part his and Dolph’s team after you had helped the latter win the Intercontinental Championship and ended your on-screen relationship with the Architect, Seth Rollins. You and your two mates would often car pool, go out for drink after a long week of shows. Hell, you have even shared a hotelroom with the two. Though you have forced Dolph and Drew to sleep in the same bed so you could have the single bed for yourself. But something always seemed weird between you and Drew when you were in the arena. It was almost like he was purposefully avoiding you.

So there you were, sulking and glaring daggers at your biggest rival, Sasha Banks. You never got along. Especially after Sasha botched a move at Wrestlemania 33, benching you for more than half a year. Even worse, you had to give up your Women’s Championship. And now she had the audacity to flirt with your man. Technically Drew wasn’t your man, but it didn’t matter. The whole women’s roster knew about your small crush. Or rather big crush.

As you were playing with the straw of your soda Dolph came strolling into the cafeteria, scanning the whole room before his eyes landed on you. Immediately he made his way over. You wished he didn’t see you. Don’t get me wrong, you loved Dolph. Ever since you debuted as a part of the SHIELD in 2012, you two got along very well. But you were in no mood for conversation right now. 

“What’s up, Buttercup?”, he asked, gracefully plopping down next to you on the vacant chair.

“Not much...”, you dryly responded, taking the last sip of your drink and scratching the bottom of the glass with your straw. 

Dolph leant back, sighed and then smacked both his hands on his thighs. “Okay, (Y/N), you’re awfully quiet today. Something is wrong. By now you would’ve told me what you ate, who you’ve seen and how many people called your name when got out of the car today already.”

You took another glance over to Sasha and Drew and then mumbled a quiet “Nobody plans murder out loud”. Dolph looked into the direction you were practically staring for the last thirty minutes, “Oh I get it. Banks is talking to Drew. And you don’t like it. I totally understand it.”

“Of fucking course I don’t like some skank talking to my friend!”, you whisper-yelled , trying to keep a low profile.

“I don’t think it’s just because you aren’t particularly best friends with Sasha.”, Dolph said but before you could respond with a snarky remark you saw Drew casually strolling your way.

“Hey guys, ah ya ready? My match starts soon. Let’s go.”, he said in his oh so desirable Scottish accent. You wouldn’t admit it, but it made your knees weak. And not only that.

Now you were all changed into your ring gear and waited at the gorilla for your cue. You fumbled around awkwardly with your feet while you were sitting on a crate. It always made you uncommfortable standing next to Drew while he was wearing his speedo-type ring gear. You didn’t know where to look and it didn’t leave that much to the imagination. It was a mystery to you how someone wants to just expose that much to the crowd. Even you were wearing long pants. Out of the corner of your eye you spotted Drew doing stretches. You looked away while shaking your head and running your fingers over your forehead. Dolph laughed and nudged you in the side. “I swear to god he’s doing that on purpose.”, you whispered. Finally it was your time to go outside.

So far everything was going to plan. The plan was that you get knocked off the apron by Seth accidentally when Drew shoved him. Next thing was Seth was supposed to unintentionally land on you. So you weren’t practically having the best time ever already. But that’s the price you paid for being a wrestler. But then things turned even more awful and went not according to the script. As you and Seth were on the ground Drew made his way over to the two of you. He fired up the band and used his finisher, the Claymore. 

Unfortunetaly, Seth has moved out of the way accidentally. So a 6′5″, 265 lbs giant just nailed you right in the face. You weren’t completely against the thought of Drew nailing you, but not like that. Because of the botch you caught his foot right on the bridge of your nose, full impact, instant knockout.

In the end Drew was victorious over Seth. Dolph attacked him when the ref was looking over to you and Drew. Like the real gentleman he was he carried you backstage, while you were trying to not lose as much blood as possible. After he had dropped you off at the doctor he vanished and dragged Ziggler along with him. 

“How typical...”, you sighed as the doctor examined your nose. He tweaked a little here, pushed a bit there. And you were in agonizing pain. 

“Alright, (Y/N) looks like you have a broken nose and you even had a tooth knocked out clean.”, he said, shoving a towel in your mouth to stop the bleeding. 

“He fnocked a footh outh?!” your yelling and speaking muffled through the thick fabric. He told you that you were really lucky because your nose won’t be in an odd position when it completely healed off. But your tooth obviously had to be replaced. The doctor left after he patched you up. You still sat on the examination table thinking about where your tooth is right now. Maybe someone from the staff wasn’t too disgusted to pick it up. 

As you were dreaming about your vacant tooth there was a knock on the doorframe. It was Drew. He was holding some sort of card. You had no idea how he got it that fast, but it didn’t matter. You were hurt. Physically and emotionally. 

“Hey, toothless Lizzy. I got ya somethin’., he said quietly as he sat down and handed you the card.

You opened it carefully, because it looked like some really flimsy and damp paper that was laying around somewhere for ages. “I’m sorry I knocked your tooth out and broke your nose?”, you had to stiffle a laugh as you read it, “You are a absolute fucking unit, do you know that?”

Drew suddenly tensed up, he knew you were to bring up the “I feel like you’re avoiding me topic”, “Look love. Ah kno’ ah hurt ya.”

“No, don’t call me love. You didn’t just physically hurt me. You hurt my feelings as well.”, now you were angry, “You’ve been avoiding me ever since we got paired on RAW. I don’t know why you do it, maybe you don’t like me, maybe...”

And then something happened you’d only dreamt about. He kissed you. But with such care not to hurt you. You didn’t care that your busted lip was screaming for help right now. As you parted lips he held your face with his big hands. His mesmerizing blue eyes met yours. “Listen ‘ere, love. Ah never meant ta ignore ya like ‘hat. Ah just felt so awkward ‘round ya. Ah didn’t wan’ ta screw it all up. An’ ah also got ya somethin’ else.”, he handed you something wrapped in a napkin. As you unfolded the small object you sulked. It was your tooth. You closed your eyes and laughed ab little bit. 

“ABSOLUTE FUCKING UNIT!”, you yelled, laughing, as you threw your bloody towel at him. 

A/N: So, there you have it. Maybe it has too much plot idk. This took like 3 hours to write because I’ve been constantly looking for synonyms. Please do note that English is not my first language so there may be some mistakes. If you find some, you can keep ‘em. And I also don’t know how to write a scottish accent. Please don’t throw rocks at me. :(