#just came back from a bachelor party in florida with some very cishet southern gentlemen

[cheerchime]

Yeah, I KNOW I make a lot of nipple jokes bruh, I am among the privileged nip-less few. It is my right, NAY, my DUTY to tap into a niche sub-sub-sub-genre of queer humor that knocks the cishets dead and magically helps them use the correct pronouns.

"Oh, I live pretty North and they deemed my nipples a public health hazard in the winter months. I had them removed so as not to poke out eyes."

"I donated them to MLM: Mamas Lacking Mammaries."

"Where are my nips? I mean, they're right- OH DEAR GOD IT HAPPENED AGAIN"

"One cannot purple a nurp when there is no nurple to purp, and that's the first step to winning the war."

And they can't not laugh! Or they aren't a savvy ally! They're duty-bound lest they be deemed a transphobe! Such! Is! My Power!