#joseph seed x female deputy

[axelflare9700]

Joseph Seed x Deputy Riley Colt

[kittiofdoom]

aHHHHHHHHHHH @redreart is amazing please look at how soft this commission of Avery and Joseph is I’m CRY. All the little details and their expressions THE FOREHEAD TOUCHING and they look so happy aHHHHHHHH. 10000/10 you should commission them.

[seedofjoseph]

sweet talk

Fandom: Far Cry: New Dawn

Relationship(s): Joseph Seed x F!Judge; Polyseed feat. F!Judge

Rating: M (mature)

Words: 650

Author's note: This newest episode of my FC:ND AU is sweeter than the previous one (link). Check out the Jacob & John episodes here: link & link

"Right there," your voice shook, your heart skipped a beat and your hair stood on end. "R-right there," you opened your mouth wide, tossed your head all the way back, and sunk further down into the furs. "That's the fucking spot."

He tutted, halting his healing touch on your swollen sole. "No profanities."

"Are you f-" you bit your lip and swallowed the cuss word. And, because your craving for Joseph Seed's love ate away at you faster than any famine could, you begged the man sitting below you, on his knees, at your feet: "Please."

"Please what?"

"You know."

From atop his cot, you looked down at him with pleading eyes. As always, you found Joseph's clear, sky-blue eyes looking back. But, unlike most days, he clouded one by closing it. By winking.

"No," he opened both his eyes again. If you had blinked, you would've missed it. "I don't know, so you'll have to tell me," his hands latched onto the foot in his lap, lifting it. "And you'll have to do it without using cuss words."

"Father," you gasped out rather than speak up. "Please don't stop," you pushed the foot deeper into his warm palm. "Please, Father," you traced his lap with the toes still resting on it.

His eyes were fixated on yours, only moving to take in your mouth and the shape of it as his appellative passed your lips. Even so, the warmth of your bare sole seeped through his worn-out trousers, and all his blood flow was focused on that one spot over his crotch. And it only took one twitch for him to start pressing his thumb on your spot again.

The Father spoke softly as if the air around you had thinned. "You've been suffering in silence, haven't you?" His sigh was heavy and hot as it hit the chaffed flesh of your foot. "You hold your head up high even as your own legs buckle under you," he kissed your aching ankle where your old boots have been bruising you. "My sweet girl, why didn't you come to me sooner?" He continued circling the sweet spot on his sweet girl's sole. "My sweet, prideful girl," his free hand slid across his prideful girl's swelling belly.

You wanted to explain yourself by going over all the new calming concoctions Faith has come up with since your two previous pregnancies. And you wanted to excuse yourself by pointing out his holy man priorities which were many, the mother of his children being just one of them.

"Father," you laid back on the cot, into the furs. Then, you teased the swell in his pants as he traced the swell of your belly. "Please, I need it," you moaned, melting under him like ice caps in the nuclear summer. "I need you."

Now, as you looked at him through tearful eyes, you saw a storm forming in his. Through the thick lump in your throat, you called to him, and he climped up on all fours to join you in his cot. He looked at you and you knew that he was flesh and blood like you. You knew that this holiest of men was you man, and you were now, for the third time, of his flesh and blood. And he was now, for the third time, worshipping your bountiful body with the same awe you watched God's new world bloom.

"My sweet girl," he cupped your face, his forehead falling atop of yours. "My sweetest girl," he kissed each of your eyes close, then your lips, and, finally, he lifted your legs atop his shoulders and kissed his way down to your sweetest spot. "All you had to do was beg."

[gaqalesqua]

Wyn didn’t last long when it was finally the two of them.

Of course Joseph Seed was an Alpha; they didn’t call him the Father for nothing, did they?

[skoll-sun-eater]

Dessert; FC5 oneshot fic

Here's a snippet of something I just finished.

Just experimenting with how to write different 'situations' ;)

Warnings: Slight BDSM descriptions. Nothing too graphic, but there is the air of Sub/Dom language and interactions going on.

Pairings: Deputy OC Phedra/Jacob Seed. Deputy OC Phedra/John Seed. Deputy OC Phedra/Joseph Seed.

Just the brothers tonight, with the exception of the deputy as the main guest of honor. The deputy has become a permanent part of the scenery among the Seed family.

Jacob captured her and put her through the ringer in the first couple of trials. But she has- other purposes far more beneficial than the brothers could have imagined.

They all gather around in John’s dining room and they enjoy small portions of food, quite small. The arrangement and vittles are carefully laid on John’s cedar wood table. He set out crystal glass plates with crisp beige, cloth napkins folded in triangular puffs.

“Hmm, you brought out your finest crap huh Johnny?” Jacob says, teasing his indulgent baby brother.

The look of annoyance is visible on the Baptist’s countenance. “Of course, I want to show Miss Dawson that we’re not the uncivilized animals that the resistance likes to paint us out to be.” John scoffs.

The three pull out their chairs and take their seats. But the deputy is left in idle, waiting to be told what to do next. Though she’s a guest, she acts much like a servant.

“C’mere Phedra, you have permission to sit at the table.” Jacob finally beckons to the woman. She’s being tested for her obedience.

Phedra takes a seat in between Jacob at his side and John who sits at the head of the table. Joseph sits across from Phedra facing her. She’s in his direct line of sight, it’s unnerving, how he looks at her through his yellow aviators, watching. She knows why, this dinner isn’t so much about the actual food.

But…

“Really? Sunglasses at night?”

“Excuse me my child,” Joseph’s voice cuts through Phedra’s thoughts of belittling of his choice of attire. “Would you please pour myself and my brothers some wine?”

Phedra looks to Jacob for instruction. “Go on, if they ask ya to do something, you do it.”

Phedra rises from her seat, and reaches across for a bottle Merlot John had set on the dining table. She sidesteps her way and pours the wine into the sparkling crystal glasses.

“You look lovely this evening, my dear Miss Dawson. Quite…” John looks her up and down, like he’s surveying a tall tree from his chair. “…provocative.” He simpers at her as she retreats back to her chair.

Perhaps he isn’t wrong about how she is presented, Jacob specifically chose this dress for her tonight. A deep ultramarine blue dress, backless halter with the neck plunging down to her navel. It was quite short and fit all the contours of her athletic but full curvy figure.

Read the rest here in the link below, if interested.

Thank you for stopping by.

[starlightreign]

Seed family glow up part 1 : Rook and Joseph

[socially-awkward-skeleton]

Chapter 56: For it is Time for Judgement to Begin

Summary: The end is near, it's in the very air of Hope County after the destruction of Joseph's Island, and the residents are about to meet their due. Kit is forced to make a decision that causes her only pain in an attempt to ready herself for the coming war.

Warnings for this chapter: descriptions of immolating someone, mentions of military violence, mentions of religious trauma, and general warning for Kit's mental instability

Only 5 chapters left to go!!

[silverapplestock]

Had so much fun doing this commission for @agamemgoth of Jacob Seed and their Deputy! 🥺💕 I miss drawing the Seeds 💖

[axelflare9700]

"Forgive me father for I've Sinned"

[kittiofdoom]

"Soft hand touches with a light comforting squeeze that instantly assures you they're there." for Avery and Joseph?

Soft Touches

Words: 804 Tags: overstimulation but not in a sexy way it's the other way, slightly possessive Joseph Thank you so much for the prompt!! I blame listening to the choir versions of the songs for this. Why does the music have to go so hard? Also I put a face touch in here too because I can't help myself.

The world was a fraction off kilter. Some small part of her recognized it was in her head, but that thought was buried under too bright lights and a cacophony of garbled noise that Ava couldn't even begin to process. Some days Ava just woke up and the world was wrong and no matter what it didn't right itself. She just had to suffer through it—that was how it had always been.

John's sunglasses sat on her nose, baseball cap pulled down to cast a dark shadow across her scowling features. She was currently curled into the smallest possible ball she could make herself on one of the church pews, head resting on her knees as Joseph conducted his sermon. The people beside her knew to give her space, even when the church was packed full they made sure to give Ava a comfortable distance not to make her uncomfortable. She was glad for it, but didn't quite know how to express that so she just kept the sentiment to herself.

Joseph was talking, but Ava couldn't hear, words lost to her in the ringing of her ears but she stared at him like he was the sun. Beautiful—radiant—bathing all those in his holy light with warmth and comfort.

He noticed her halfway through his sermon, the smallest raise of his brow in silent question—are you okay?—as he continued to speak. His gaze drifted away over the familiar faces of his flock, returning after a few words for his answer.

Ava's stillness was all the answer Joseph needed.

It was a small movement at first, descending down from the podium step by step. If he moved too quickly Ava might bolt, she was timid like that. A wounded animal that needed to be gently approached. She shuffled back in her seat but relaxed as soon as Joseph walked to someone else and ran his hands over their shoulder, then another person with their arm and a third cradling the back of their head.

He stayed like this, walking amongst his people, giving comfort with his words and touch until he'd done enough loops to get close enough to Avery. She scowled at him from underneath the brim of her hat, knowing that he'd end up here but not wanting to be singled out.

Joseph smiled and offered his hand first, waiting for Ava to come to him. It took a minute but eventually her scarred fingers and palm slid against his own.

The world shifted back into focus, just a fraction, Joseph's voice piercing through the noise.

“-we must remember to love each other, deeply, unashamed. We must support each other and carry the burden. Let love triumph over a multitude of sins,” Joseph said, squeezing Ava's hand as he spoke. “We are not made to be islands, lost at sea with nothing on the horizon but storm clouds.”

Ava relaxed, her legs sliding along the pew and tucking beside her rather than being built like a wall between them. Joseph always had this way through to her. Ava couldn't explain it, but it didn't matter how far gone she was. Joseph could always bring her back.

“If you see your neighbour struggling, reach out to them. Let His love—my love—act through you and guide the lost and the weary,” Joseph continued. His other hand reached out, the back of his fingers brushing against Ava's cheek until the bumped against John's sunglasses. The corners of his lips pulled into a thin line briefly when he looked back over to John behind him as if to confirm they did in fact belong to his brother.

“You are not alone, you are loved and protected,” Joseph didn't miss a beat in his words despite his movements. Gently, carefully, he plucked the glasses from Ava's nose, gesturing behind him with them for John to come and claim them. When he had Joseph pulled his hand away from Ava for just a moment, despite the small noise of protest she made. Her hand hovered in the space between them, lost.

Joseph reached up and removed his own sunglasses, offering Ava a smile as he slid them on her face. That was better. He then took her hand and found her once more, tracing the rough lines of scarring with his thumb. He draw them one by one in a well practiced motion, knowing the way they cut across her skin without needing to look.

Ava stared up at him, finally calm and he could see the adoration and love writ across her features, bright—radiant—beautiful. She was the moon, reflecting his light back him. Sometimes she might hide herself away in shadows, but she could never truly be hidden.

His light would always find her.

“The storm will break. I am here.”

[flare-queen]

Some fun screenshots from the arcade, with the Seeds and Deputy Riley Colt.

[inafieldofdaisies]

WIP Wednesday | Tagged by @thesingularityseries <3 | Tagging @socially-awkward-skeleton @direwombat @adelaidedrubman @strafethesesinners @strangefable @nightbloodbix @nightwingshero @aceghosts @madparadoxum @g0dspeeed @trench-rot @josephseedismyfather @josephslittledeputy @euryalex @sstewyhosseini @detectivelokis @purplehairsecretlair @jinfromyarikawa @shegetsburned @clicheantagonist @locustandwildhoney @fourlittleseedlings @poisonedtruth @vampireninjabunnies-blog @cassietrn @wrathfulrook and anyone with something to share this week <3

I'm dropping bits and pieces from Chapter 9, this it the final WIP post on it before I post the whole thing sometime later this week.

After taking few minutes to shake off the sleep and what remained of the awful dream, Sabrina got up, her eyes focusing on their bags by the door. She knew it was time to stop avoiding the inevitable, so she picked them up and put them on the bed, methodically pulling out clothes and folding them in a dresser at the far end of the room. When Savannah's things were neatly sorted away, she moved onto her own bag, opening the zipper and taking out garments until something made her freeze and blink in confusion. What the fuck. The lacy bralette John had picked up back in her room and joked about was now in her hands, when she had put it back into her underwear drawer. To make things worse, tucked between a pair of jeans further down into the bag was what he probably deemed as the matching panties. No way. There was only one explanation, and she laughed at the ridiculous idea, until she remembered his lack of boundaries and how he was on his own in her room for a short while. But why would you even… She thought back to what she could only describe as lust filled looks he had given her then, how he always managed to invade her personal space. Thinking I'm putting these on? Watch me burn them in the fireplace, Seed.

[John is a broody boy and misses dinner because he's conflicted af]

She was set on catching him as he came home, on not letting him sneak off without getting anwers. Even if she fell asleep on the couch, it was a better alternative than waking Savannah up with her reoccurring nightmare. As she waited she took her time to snoop around the living room, shooting another look of disgust at the portrait of Joseph. Something that kept tempting her since her arrival was a landline that was placed on a side table there. With her sister fast asleep she took the chance and picked up the receiver. Who do I even call? Sabrina didn't have many numbers memorized, aside from her ex-partner's number in Portland and her precinct's, The Spread Eagle's since Joey regularly ordered food from it for the Sheriff's Department and the one of the jail her mother was serving her time at. She knew she could depend on Leslie to believe her and get outside help, that he would go as far as finding a way to storm the County even with the lockdown Eden's Gate was enforcing. She took a deep breath and dialed his number, but the line refused to connect.

"Fuck. Why did I even think it would work?", she whispered, then set on punching in the bar's digits next. The same thing happened again, making her huff in frustration. Then another strange number that was haphazardly jotted down at the the phone itself caught her eye. "What do we have here?", she stared at it in curiosity and before she could stop herself she dialed it. Seconds passed by that put her on edge, making her question her choice as she feared who would pick up and wondered if she should hang up. Instead an automated voice finally responded, "You have one new message from September, 4th." "Voicemail, thank fuck.", she released the breath she was holding and held the receiver to her ear as the machine prompted the caller to leave a message after the tone. The voice she heard next spread goosebumps over her skin, an awful reminder of the arrest and the constant nightmare that haunted her. "After all the Atonements, all the Confessions, all that you've done for me and Eden's Gate is not enough, is it, John? I worry what has gotten into you since the Reaping had started. You ignore my calls, anytime I reach out to you I'm met with Mathias on the other side instead, telling me you're busy. It's the urges again, isn't it? You have to cast away your past, John. You need to open up your heart, you need to see that there is more love all around you. All the pain and suffering you spread will not help us in the long run. These actions will only feed the sin inside you. It will grow stronger, it will convince you to do wicked things. Those you scar too deeply, they will heal, they will become carriers of your sin. They will spread that sin to others. I've seen your death in a vision, you are destined to be slayed by your own sin. It will come back around in a new form, it's only a matter of when. I've seen you die young, I've seen you die old. The difference between the two outcomes is how much love you let into your heart. I pray that you hear these words before it's too late. I want to see you become an old man in the Paradise we prepared for. I love you brother." Joseph's voice faded away, replaced by the automated one, "Press 1 to listen to the message again. To delete the message, press 2." Sabrina put down the receiver back in its place, leaning against the table as her mind ran over what she had just heard. "What the hell…", she sighed. She doubted John had listened to the message. What worried her more was the fact Joseph seemed suspicious of his brother's behavior. "If it's so damn important, why leave it in a voicemail, Joseph?", she gritted out. Sabrina wanted to laugh at Joseph's hypocrisy masked as concern. His tone, the ultimatums, subtle guilting, all sounded way too familiar to her. He wanted John to let love into his heart, yet he was enabling him in his quest of hurting others. The Project's pointless torture he called "Confessions", was the reason he almost had died on that road that very morning, she doubted Charlie would be the last one to go after him for revenge. If Joseph wanted someone to blame, he didn't have to look far. "And Savannah is now in the middle of it all.", she bit her lip, the frustration making her restless. Joseph's warnings were a cryptic mess, hinting at someone's arrival. She had no doubt if he ever finds out about her visions, he'd declare her to be that person, convince John she would cost him his life, when she had seen him alive as disaster struck, the event his brother predicted as "The Collapse". "You're going to live, Seed. I'm going to make sure of it, then your brother will show his true face. His type always do eventually." She didn't delete the voicemail, instead retreated back to the couch and wrapped a blanket around herself. It was way past midnight when she heard the front door open and quiet footsteps carrying towards the stairs. John was either set on ignoring her completely or hadn't noticed her sitting in the dimly-lit living room.

After the realization he missed Sabrina and looking into her phone, John threw himself into Confessions even harder, convincing himself at one point he'd manage to exorcise her out of his thoughts. He found himself making Wyatt bring in Sinner after Sinner until 12 am rolled around. By then he could tell the man was exhausted and quite suspicious at the urgency he was showcasing. His people were used to him burying himself in work prior to Sabrina's arrival, but never really to that extreme, so he wrapped up the last Confession for the day reluctantly. He parted ways with Wyatt and after cleaning up and picking up his things, John got into a truck and headed back to the Ranch. On his way over he contemplated if sleeping on the couch at his office like he'd done so many times before was a better idea, but he was aching for a shower and his own bed for once. He hoped Sabrina would be asleep, that she would have taken the hint, and keep her distance. He didn't want to face her, not that night, not when no matter how much he tried to focus on the Sinners in his chair, thoughts of her poured back in little by little until he felt like he was drowning.Until the Confessions became the distraction while she turned into the main thing occupying his mind.

John parked the truck, releasing Mathias from his post for the night, the man gave him a strange look as he passed him on the way to the front door. Bennett knew his moods well after working together for years, so he left with a simple "Goodnight". He stepped inside, navigating the living room in the darkness, moonlight and memories of the layout guiding him to the stairs, to the safety of his room. "You're here.", her voice stopped him in his tracks, the one thing he had been yearning to hear the whole day, instead of Hartley's whiny voice or the Sinners' neverending screams as he released their sins. John's lack of response didn't discourage Sabrina. "I have a feeling you're ignoring me for some unknown to me reason, but I don't deal with situations like that, John.", she sighed, "You told me we'd go over the fine details of the deal, so let's talk like adults. And… Savannah waited for you at dinner." John stole a glance her way, memorizing the way her gray hair picked up the faint light from the windows as she sat on the couch. She looked almost illusory. A part of him wished she'd disappear and take the urges with her. "You gonna reply at some point or am I as good as talking to a wall here, or maybe one of the taxidermy animals? Scary fuckers." He couldn't help a smirk from emerging on his face at her undying wit, still he kept his silence, gripping the railing, while his feet remained rooted at the spot, unwilling to move. He had no idea how long he stayed like that until he heard Sabrina let out another disappointed sigh as she got up from the couch. Her footsteps nearing him, anticipation raising in him at her approach, at the unknown. What are you up to, Deputy? She simply breezed past him, her own feet hitting the first step, as she said, "Fine, play your childish games on your own, Seed. Goodnight."

He wasn't holding the railing anymore, instead grabbing her hand as she passed him and turning her around until she was facing him, one step above him, bringing them to the same eye level. John's gaze drank her in hungrily: running over the tight blank tank top that hugged her form and matching sleep pants she was wearing all in contrast to her fair skin. Her hair flowed over her shoulders in soft waves, her tattoo was peaking out under the straps, teasing him. His fingers were still wrapped around her wrist, her pulse beating against them, picking up as the seconds passed. "Sabrina.", it was the first thing he had said since entering the ranch. Her eyes narrowed in confusion, as they searched his. "So you do speak… Can we move onto full sentences next? I'm kind of on my way to bed." John's gaze shifted to her forearm, the sight of a bandage making him smile. He felt pride at the fact she had listened to him and taken care of the wound. "Okay, this is officially awkward.", Sabrina pursed her lips, the move drawing his attention to them. His free hand grabbed a piece of her hair, wrapping it around his fingers, her breath hitching as he said, "Kept you waiting again, didn't I?" She shook her head, "Nope, you're not doing this again. I have questions, John. I'm not in the mood for whatever game you're playing." He couldn't help but smile at the fire in her gaze, "Tomorrow, Deputy, we're both exhausted." "How do I know you will keep that promise? I left you a plate, you know. Even though you didn't show up." Her words held a note of disappointment while her face remained passive. "I'm sorry." "Do you mean that, or is this another act?" Sabrina wasn't holding back, her eyes shining in conviction. "I mean it, Sabrina." "Why are you avoiding me?" "Just doing us both a favor." The cryptic reply made her roll her eyes, "You're just going to keep doing this, eh? Fine, one last thing. Did you pack things for me while I was gone from the room?" John raised an eyebrow, feigning confusion while knowing full well she was talking about the lacy number he had shoved into the duffel bag, but he wasn't going to incriminate himself. Sabrina ripped her hand out of his grip, shaking her head, "Let me guess, you have no idea what I'm talking about?" "Yes.", he challenged. "You're unbeliavable. First chance I get, I'm throwing them in that fancy fireplace of yours, John." "Now that would be a shame." "I thought you didn't know what I meant? Are you getting rusty, Mr. hotshot lawyer? Losing track of your claims?", her lips curved into a triumphant smirk. "I assure you, Sabrina, nothing is rusty about me." She rolled her eyes and took a few steps up, holding the railing for security while she was still facing him, anticipating he might try to stop her from retreating again, when there was enough distance between them and no indication for anything nefarious, she turned her back, headed to her own room. As she made it on the second floor she called out, "We're talking tomorrow, Seed. I'm holding you to it." "Wouldn't expect anything else, Deputy." Good, walk away, before I do something we both regret. He waited until he heard her door close before he climbed upstairs too, preparing himself for another night where she would reign over his dreams, wearing allure like a second skin. Promising all kinds of sinful things if he just gives in. Daring him to forego Eden.

Bonus scene because I know y'all love Savannah.

"Where did he go?" To his bunker. But saying that would raise even more questions, instead she replied by simply saying, "He had some business to take care of. He's a lawyer, you know, boring adult things." Torture. Kidnapping. Murder. Running a cult. Checking crimes off his list at a rate that would make him into any lawyer's worst nightmare. Hell, he'd probably represent himself. Just boring adult things. Savannah giggled, "Does he wear an actual suit?"

[seedofjoseph]

One week later, it's here.

John Seed and his boys pull up to The Spread Eagle guns blazing and demand Mary May hand over every single bottle of whatever the Junior Deputy's drink of choice is.

Later that night, he gloats about being the only one in the Valley capable of quenching their thirst. And, of course, he does all of this publicly, over the radio, to draw them out.

The next morning, Joseph Seed himself lands his helicopter at the Ranch to give his baby brother a proper scolding away from prying eyes and ears, only to find him treating a hungover Deputy and cleaning up their new Gluttony tramp scar.

[shalotttower]

Title: Beneath The Skin Fandom: Far Cry 5 Characters: John Seed x Reader (female) Summary: John discovers a soulmate in one of his faithful after her indoctrination. Word count: 1200+ Notes: soft yandere!John Seed, religious themes, soulmate AU, captivity, obsession, past rough treatment, past torture, brainwashed Reader, John being John, Reader isn't Deputy, I'm depressed so now you'll be too.

You've been staring at him a lot lately. John can't tell if it's a good sign or not. In his experience, silence is usually followed by screaming and begging, not contemplation, but you're quiet and watchful, like a church mouse.

"Tell me what you desire," he says, cupping your face with his palms.

There's no pleading with you. No crying for help from the outside world. He's not used to this quiet acceptance of circumstances.

What John used to is peeling away the layers of flesh, until there's nothing but raw essence underneath. You're still not free of sin. He can see it, plain as day: sloth shines through the cracks of you. He could force it out. Carve the letters into your skin again, one by one, and maybe then you'd finally scream for mercy.

But he doesn't. Joseph told him to be careful with God's gifts, to be patient and endure. So he waits, and so you stare, and the silence stretches in-between.

"Why don't you tell me?" John asks.

He heard long time ago that through desires one's true self becomes visible. He wants to see yours.

"There's nothing to wish for in Eden's Gate, Herald."

There is no venom in your words. There's nothing in your words.

He thinks about patience and endurance, and wonders if the river washed away something essential off you during the baptism, or this docile and meek nature is just who you are.

You'd pass easily as one of Faith's angels, even without the Bliss.

---

John knows that you like to read. You take books from his personal library and he finds them later, stacked in a neat pile on a bedside table. Some nights when he returns to the ranch, you're still awake at the desk with a pair of glasses on the bridge of your nose.

"So that's why," he thought after leafing through your medical file, "you didn't recognize me at the river. They must've fell off during the transportation."

John wears his mark with pride. Not hidden, like Joseph's or Jacob's, but on display. A declaration that he's been chosen by God, that's he's not broken, not ruined — worthy to have a soulmate.

He remembers your expression back then. Confusion. You looked at him, squinting, like you didn't understand, couldn't fathom why would someone do this to you.

And then he dunked you under.

---

"Confession," John murmured. "It sets you free."

"Atonement," he told you later and took a knife to your flesh.

He wanted to make you feel small, insignificant — Deputy kept causing trouble, and temperance never was among his virtues.

"There's nothing more pure than a blank sheet, darling. I'll help you get rid of sin. Don't be afraid, let the pain cleanse you."

And you screamed.

Sloth. Pride. He carved them both and you cried and prayed until your voice broke, but haven't asked him to stop, not once.

After that, you blended into the crowd well, a nobody amongst the sheep not meant to stand out.

---

He didn't know.

Hadn't seen it, caught up in the excitement of the moment.

---

This time when he comes back, you're curled on the bed with a book that doesn't belong to his library. The cover is pale yellow with floral decorations and birds on it, a bit worn. How it came into your hands, John has an idea. There's only one person who likes cheesy romance novels here.

Your foot sways in the air back and forth, gently, like a pendulum.

"Didn't take you for a fan of light reading, my dear. How many maidens have fallen for dashing rascals tonight?"

"Herald John," you greet.

His stomach flips when you look up.

To think that you were one of many who cooked and cleaned around the compound all this time, who lived in the barracks and tended the apple orchards, and no one ever noticed. Who almost slipped through his fingers into the Henbane River, if he wasn't reminded of restraint.

Now you're here, in his room, and John has no idea what to do with you. He's good with words, they always come out naturally, like a weapon in a carefully crafted arsenal, but all seem inadequate when your mark is out there so openly unapologetic.

You're like a doll he's got a hold of: speaks when spoken to and moves when nudged.

He sits on the edge of the bed.

"This doesn't look like approved reading material," John comments idly, but makes no move to take the book away. Books like these aren't banned, simply considered too shallow to nourish a mind. He flipped through one himself and found it hilariously cliche.

"Sister Faith keeps bringing them," you respond. "I...keep them until she picks them up again."

You call his family members by titles rather than names. John suspects it stems from the trials and humility which they bring. Joseph is Father, Faith is Sister, Jacob is...nothing. You don't dare use any monikers with Jacob even though no one would mind now when you're family.

His thumb runs over your ankle. A small white lilly under the fabric of your leggings looks delicate and a bit like a mockery.

God's gifts are bestowed to cherish.

John thinks about the way you trembled during the baptism — sweet, sweet terror.

God's gifts are bestowed to nurture.

"Why didn't you plead with me?"

You pause.

"For what, Herald?"

John wants to shake you. Wants you to scream and glare like Deputy did when he carved the sin upon her body. Little wrathling, full of rage and spite; now Jacob is grooming her as a weapon, and it seems to suit her better than wreaking havoc across the county. Jacob's methods are meticulous and inevitable, brutal but most efficient, and he'll get her where he needs her to be: strong and able, with her fire burning for a better cause.

"Reprieve," John says. "Mercy."

He leans closer and waits, but your eyes travel down to your lap, then to your fingers, entwined together above the pages.

"There was no use."

Your smile is soft and empty, and John gets the feeling of missing a step on a flight of stairs.

"It wouldn't have been enough."

You speak it like a truth carved on stone, something so very evident that even a newborn infant can comprehend. Like the sun is warm, the water is wet, and Herald John Seed doesn't give mercy to sinners — he takes them apart piece by piece so they can start anew without the burden of guilt.

---

Aren't soulmates meant to know each other intimately? Aren't they meant to complete?

Yet there's an absence of him in you and you in him. It's a hollow space between your bodies when you both lie side by side at night, a gaping wound, and it won't go away, no matter how close you curl into his arms or how tight he holds onto you.

He touches you often: strokes your hair while you read books by lamplight, kisses your forehead when you pray before bedtime.

"Tell me what you desire," John asks again.

And again, patiently you reply: "Eden's Gate offers everything I could ever wish for."

---

He wonders what fairy tale romance you will find next week between the pages, and if there will be mercy in it which you didn't find in that bunker.

[starlightreign]

Promoting this here even though I don't really promote my ao3 but uh I started a Deputy!reader x Joseph fic that deals with a lot (check tags for details) and I quite enjoy writing the dynamic cause it's interesting and I think their dynamic plays together quite well.