#joecena
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John's first casting couch [feat. Joe's bloody busted open face]
#I love how he says he was too small#itty bitty baby buff boy#big beefy baby boy body#I find it interesting also how they show the clip of bloody Joe which had to have shot months out from this taping#because John had been wrestling in UPW for longer than Joe#so yeah that would make sense considering this (probably) aired in late 2000--late production choice#john cena#the prototype#samoa joe#upw#joecena
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*Prototype
Joe and John in 2000
#can we talk about them now#please#I’ve been going fucking insane over here#get some eyes on this#samoa joe#john cena#upw#joecena
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😀🔫
#I don't believe this by the way but how fucking DARE this shitty web corp clickbait fuckin content mill bullshit website#even THINK about putting this in front of my goddamn eyes#samoa joe#john cena#joecena
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I am so sorry, boys. You was doomed as fuck. They ain't even give you a CHANCE.
#guys I just wanted to have a fun yaoi night but now I'm just seething with rage#someone hold me#samoa joe#john cena#joecena
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Samoa Joe: ultimate fat boy
#you're damn right he is#name me a fat boy of higher quality than Joe#you can't#this is so adorable I had to post it I'll stop with the spam of terrible audio on this shoot now#damn you John Cena grow a spine eat your damn cookies#best thing to come from that Jakked match honestly#samoa joe#roh#wwe#joecena
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In general, I think, wrestling is good to rare pairs. Usually the two people with chemistry and a history have at LEAST had a match together. That's what's great about wrestling, the world is all very incestuous so to speak, it's about who you know and who you can find a way to get booked with, runs gotta line up, scheduling and injury you gotta dance around but if your pair is in the business for long enough you can get lucky. It happens. Bookers can be real quick to jump at opportunities and there is a good chance you will EVENTUALLY get a match. Quality and length is up in the air. This is not always the case, of course. Samoa Joe and John Cena, for instance. The thing about JoeCena that burns my ass the most is that they have been snuffed, by my count, at least 3 separate times.
At one point in 2001, Joe was the UPW champ and good ol Prototype was the number one contender. It didn't get booked because contracts were buhhhhh and Rick Bassman was euhhhhh and John might've been bodybuilding or some shit. Whatever. Whatever. Pft.
2001-2003. Joe periodically fucks off to be a gaijin in Zero-1 and get shitfaced on someone else's dime leaving destroyed hotel rooms in his wake, wooooo les fucking go. Or maybe not. Everything was lined up for John to join them but contracts were once again buhhhhhhh and OVW was like euhhhhhh. Whatever. I literally don't care (I do).
WWE. Joe wrestled his ass off when he got that contract (I count 81 matches in 2015 alone and bitches wanna wonder why he took a break for his health) but couldn't get a good push that third or fourth time around to save his life for various medical and bureaucratic reasons and I also suspect you know who. They had two singles matches on back to back house shows and a couple uninspired tag matches with minimal contact. John Cena was at that point John Cena so you know. Whatever. I'm cool guys, I'm cool.
What the hell am I saying. Well. They got started at the same wrestling school, they've sparred and run drills together, they've rolled around in the ring, they've shared many opponents and out of ring moments, Joe has invited John to the family cookouts, he has even witnessed some of the first thuganomics freestyles during road trips (and very likely video taped at least one but that WMA link is dead in a fucking ditch), John even bought one of Joe's t shirts. "The champ is here", they share that, the shaka sign, they share that, the funky little dance before an elbow drop, they share that, the legendary feuds with Punk, they share that. I need them to FUCK, and I cannot DO that without looking like a maniac unless they have a fucking feud. Every, single, time I watch the Howard Stern clip and hear "280, nice smile" and Cena won't shut up about how he's an ass man the crackhead that lives in my brain runs around screaming "JOE JOE JOE" and my ears ring and my vision goes white like a flashbang went off four inches up my nose. It's fucked.
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Thank you for those posts. I'm now thinking about Samoa Joe's belly resting in the insane curve of John Cena's lordosis lower back while he goes to town on that frat boy ass. Blessed.
*sobbing loudly into a table and pounding it with my fist*
THEY FIT TOGETHER LIKE PUZZLE PIECES
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Kill me, did you know? I hate everything and everyone.
#😀#so they know.#they knew.#this is from 2020 as far as I can tell and I think everyone involved should be put down like dogs#john cena#samoa joe#joecena
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Hey guys. Hehe. Check it out. Hehehehe.
#everyone say hiiiiiiii Mr. P#:)))))))))#john cena#and#samoa joe#by the transitive property#UPW#awbviously#joecena
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Impatient? No. No, I am hopping fucking mad.
#I hate you internet archive I hate you web hosts I hate you browser crawlers I hate you web services I hate you wayback machine#joecena
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Very roughly,
Dude A is Joe
Dude B is Punk
Dude C is John.
Does that make any sense? JoePunkena anyone?
Is it still a love triangle if the dates of relevancy look a little something like this?
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John you bastard…
Samoa Joe: ultimate fat boy
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