#jl.thinks

[misheardlonely]

I'm sometimes sad

I'm sometimes mad

mostly do shit without realizing it.

But one thing for sure.

I never told anyone any lies.

Something lies that causing people go from distress.

What's happening to you?

What is wrong with you?

Yes, for sure, you're nice to people.

But they cannot see what we truly see.

The true you, who likes to downgrade just because of your imaginary and illusionary.

How cruel that can be?

We just here sitting, playing, and doing our freak'n business.

But YOU who always discourage us, making us the bad one, and telling something irrelevant.

Be nice to people, so in the end they wouldn't be treating you the same way you treat others like you usually do.

Be nice, be true, be kind, and please be contented on what you have. You ungrateful bitch.

[misheardlonely]

Even if it is a tiring day, I'm glad that I did well.

[misheardlonely]

THESE DAYS

Hirap paniwalaan ang mga tao ngayon. They keep on pampering you with assurances yet behind those sweetness and eternal love may ginagawa na pala sila behind your back.

[misheardlonely]

 "People easily forget about the good things, but they can always remember the bad things, even if they happened years ago."

[misheardlonely]

Love Thoughts

Kanina, I was browsing the internet because I got bored, and I came across this quote: "I'm not good enough, and I will never be good enough." I think this is a one-sided part of a story.

Well, that's what they said to themselves. That's what they truly believed, but did you even try to ask yourself or confront yourself telling ginawa mo ba ang lahat lahat para sa kanya? Naging sapat na ba ang ginawa mo para sa kanya at di ito nagkulang? Really? I find it very annoying and hurt at the same time.

If yes, you've done your part, and that's far from enough. No need to punish yourself telling that you're not good enough. Sa usapan na ito, kung sisisihin man natin ang kung sino ang hindi enough, that's your partner or the people surrounds you. Why? They keep on asking for more knowingly na hindi mo kayang ibigay ang isang bagay na gusto nila. Like, why would they ask or demand something you cannot give? Hindi mo na ito fault, kasi you gave everything. Ang kapal lang ng pagmumukha na binigay mo na nga ang lahat lahat tapos they still have the audacity to ask for more.

Pinasok niya ang buhay mo, both of you already know what your partners capable of, naipakita mo na sa kaniya ang mga bagay na iexpect niya sa isang relasyon, nakita na niya ang buhay na meron ka. Meaning nakita niyo na ang mga bagay na meron kayo sa isa't isa. Then, why still hopeful about something more sa relasyon niyo? Your partner must know the limitations of what you can give and what you cannot give. If ikaw palagi ang naggigive, bro wake up. That's not love. That's obsession and being martyr. Stop being obsessed with someone na never ka niya nilook up at binigyan ng halaga. Stop feeding their ego na kaya mong ibagay ang lahat. Kung mapapansin mo, unti-unti ka na ding nawawalan. Not only the money of your own, but also your ownself.

Tignan mo, kapag nagfocus ka sa sarili mo, the love that you think meron kayo will eventually fall. Dito na papasok ang usapin na hindi ito makokontento kaya hahanap na siya ng bagong thrill sa buhay o papasok na ito sa buhay ng isang tao to get what they want or just simply saying, to satisfy their needs.

Wala na eh! They are not contented to what they got from you, kahit pa na sabihin mong you give all and your everything. Attention, love, loyalty, assurances, money and trust, which is why people tend to magloko. It's not you to be blame of, it is them why you suffer like that. Binigay mo ang lahat ng abot makakaya mo, pero sadyang napunta ka lang sa maling tao. Isang tao na hindi kayang tumanggap sa pagkukulang ng mahal niya.

I don't get why people get obsessed with love. Hindi ba kayo mahal ng nanay at tatay niyo. (Choss! 'kala mo naman kung meron din ako niyan.) Pero kidding aside, if your significant other cannot give the things you want, then start earning your own money and use it to have the things you wanted. If kulang, you can ask naman your significant other na buoin ang money na meron ka. Palitan mo na lang if meron ka na. After all, that's his/her own money, wala ka don nong naghihirap siya at walang wala ka don nong kelangan niya ang tulong mo. Ikaw pa 'tong may guts na magrequest ng more, ni wala ka ngang ambag sa buhay niya.

If hindi naging sapat at hinayaan mo lang ang relasyon niyo sa ere o ang isa sa inyo na magmahal ng sobra or kakaunti, and you also didn't give even a single bit of chance. You deserve all the hurt. That's all I can say. No need for you to give so much attention, all the bitter things that you received, well the justice has been served.

Lagi akong nakakawitness ng gantong pagmamahalan (I'm still glad that I've never experienced this kind of Love and will never want to experience it.) Too much kayo magmahal, magtira din kayo minsan para sa sarili niyo. Lahat ng sobra ay masama, dapat sakto lang.

peace.

[misheardlonely]

20 > 21

20 years

Seems fun at first

Every day is fun

Every day is sad

It was a roller coaster emotions

The dreams every night,

Manifesting might come.

But every time I tried to reach for You

I always end up crying and begging for nothing.

Is this really the reality?

I worked hard,

I let everything to suffer,

Physically and mentally burnt.

When I tried to breath, at least.

I got suffocated instead with so much intimidation, and pressures.

When I see you far away,

Letting my hand to have you, one inch apart.

The second turns to day, day turned to years long.

As river flows, mouth cannot spit fire.

Acceptance? Let that drop, yet this is still unquestionable.

[misheardlonely]

MY

When I first saw you, I loved you. I gave everything, everything you wanted. My Time, My Day, My Morning My Night and My soul. Everything, baby I'll gave it you, just for you.

One day, I again met you. I saw you smiling, so bright. It was a visceral moment for me making me cry like a river. People are bemused, I'm such a crazy person for something immaterial.

I was looking you from a far, never did I let my body touch you even a single strand. I am afraid that I might lost you. I am willing to do everything that makes you secured. But... “how long can you make yourself to suffer like this?”

When I saw you the first time smiling brightly like a sun. I saw, I know I am not behind of those. I saw a man from a far, lively and lovely. Seeing you there happily making me do ridiculous act.

Those brightness and how beautiful you are. I didn't know those will burnt myself. My admiration kills me, didn't know this will I end up after being with you. The cries and screams with so much affection turns to cries and scream with hurt and sorrow.

   I didn't know, the time I gave you is the time you pamper with that man.    I didn't know, the day I gave you is the day you give to let that man be happy.    I didn't know, the morning I gave you is will be the morning you awake from others bed.    I didn't know, the night I gave you will be the night you’ll use for others to have you.    I didn't know, my soul I gave you is the soul you'll waste and tossed like it was a dirt.    I didn't know, my everything turns to nothing important.

So I stopped following, I stopped breathing fine and take myself into paradise with the memories of us. Hoped the US in the other universe, will be the US I dreamt when I am still with you.

Good night friends!!

[misheardlonely]

When I said “I’m fine”

when are we going to feel this? when will be the time that our hearts feel at ease? when will I overcome this cold sweats and unwelcome thoughts? when? is it tomorrow? or I will gain nothing.

This feelings with uneasiness and keeping me distance. As the night comes, sorrow and doubts are lingered through heart and mind. This voiceless lips, this heavy thoughtless minds, making the weak, weak and unable to succeed success.

Can they still recognized people with such a heart? Can they still purely accept someone who is not sanely? Or, they are exist 'cuz you make them stay? You stay? Don't feel at ease, don't suffer? Suffer when you gave it to me.

People laugh 'cuz it's your beautifulLESS They enjoy 'cuz it's the annoyinglyness and  unwanted temptation. They couldn't let go 'cuz they want to earn. Earning something they cannot let go and you shimmer them with your spotlite.

They happy, they earn it  instead the light its you who owns it. They are the brightest, without appreciating your blackest darkness who makes them the e-light life

How painful that can be? This BIG, "to the period of time I went to numbness and couldn't see coming, who?" need to have a peace and a piece of bullet to feel the nothingness and unconsciousness mind to what relief This small, causes the life of someone shouting into crowd yet they misheard "I'm fine" couldn’t recall the Call last time.