#jensen ackles fanfiction masterlist
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zepskies · 4 months ago
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Series Masterlist - Lost on You
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Pairing: Soldier Boy (Ben) x F. Reader
Summary: 1983 is a big year for you. You’re finally chosen to join the ranks of Payback, led by the most (in)famous supe in the world: Soldier Boy. He’ll never admit that he’s trying his damndest to figure you out. You’ll never admit that he’s actually growing on you. But the problem with this game is deciding who's the predator, and who is prey.
Song Inspo: “Lost on You” by the Cubaneros (originally by LP)
AN: Oh, here we go! Get ready for another Boys AU. And in the immortal words of Cher, we're actually turning back time, to the '80s, no less.
Series Tags/Warnings: **18+ only! It's the world of The Boys, so angsty and messy, with morally gray and downright charcoal characters, including Soldier Boy, of course (and even the reader herself). **Smut, language, misogyny, violence, drug use, and other chapter-specific tags.
Chapters:
Part 1: Siren Song
Part 2: Foolish Game
Part 3: A Deal is a Deal
Part 4: Better Shape Up
Part 5: Eminence Front
Part 6: Drowned and Spellbound
Part 7: Welcome to the Jungle
Part 8: For Whom the Bell Tolls
Part 9: Free to Be You and Me
Part 10: I Need a Hero
Part 11: Heroes and Monsters
Part 12: A Fire in the Blood
Epilogue: As Good as It Gets
Series complete!
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🎙️ Listen while you read:
The Lost on You Playlist: YouTube || Spotify
Lost on You Playlist Posters
"Interrupt the flow, they better not dare..."
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Ko-Fi Me ☕
Join My Patreon 🌟
Soldier Boy Masterlist
Main Masterlist
Soldier Boy Tag List:
If you would like to follow along as I post each chapter, please follow my side blog @zepskieswrites with notifications on so you don't miss out. 💚
@spnwoman @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @adoringanakin @rizlowwritessortof @chernayawidow
@midnightmadwoman @deans-spinster-witch @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78
@deansbbyx @sarahgracej @this-is-me19 @kazsrm67 @jacklesbrainworms
@foxyjwls007 @iamsapphine @roseblue373 @lacilou @fics-pics-andotherthings-i-like
@waynes-multiverse @my-stories-vault @syrma-sensei @alwaystiredandconfused @globetrotter28
@mrsjenniferwinchester @charmed-asylum @waywardxwords @k-slla @deanbrainrotwritings
@jackles010378 @deans-daydream @deanwinchestersgirl87 @rachiem4-blog @just-levyy
@leigh70 @kmc1989 @ghostslillady @siampie @jessjad
@beautyvaliant @mimaria420 @lifeonawhim @pieandmonsters @twinkleinadiamondsky
@stoneyggirl2 @sl33pylilbunny @spnfamily-j2 @mostlymarvelgirl @artemys-ackles
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godmadeaterribleerror · 4 months ago
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No Love Lost Series Masterlist
Read on A03! - Listen to the Playlist!
Rating/Warnings: 18+ for canon-typical violence, swearing, mental health issues, mentions of rape/non-con, and sexual content.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, enemies to friends to lovers, canon divergence, slow burn, smut, angst, fluff.
Series Summary
Three years ago you were normal, the only demons you had to fight were your own, and you the most you knew of Vought and the Boys were what you saw on TV. But then you met Homelander at a stupid party, and woke up the next morning in a cell.
After almost two and a half years of you being Homelander's little project, Soldier Boy was woken up only go rouge and be put back under. Somewhere in there, you escaped. And before Queen Maeve went underground, she told William Butcher about the Anomaly, a powerful supe who recently escaped Vought captivity and may have an agenda against Homelander.
One month later, the Boys found you.
You spend the next five months helping them best you can, though your control over your powers is weak and your fear of Homelander makes you useless in combat. But you get an idea. A stupid, dangerous idea that turns you into Soldier Boy's keeper, giving him a second chance to take down Homelander, you hanging over his shoulder, a threat should he want to go nuclear again. It's exhausting and frustrating, and you might kill him and yourself as soon as this is over, but you said whatever it takes.
And this is what it takes.
Author's Note
This story is non-canon compliant, with the two main differences being;
1) Butcher doesn't have brain cancer, because I said so.
2) All of Gen V didn't take place, because I don't want to deal with the whole supe-plauge thing. Also that's too many characters to keep track of squad.
Because of this, the story will start in a similar setting as s4e5, but with different events leading up to it, and will deal with similar themes and have similar events to the rest of s4, but at an inconsistent rate. If you have any questions about other, smaller changes I have made, feel free to ask!
Navigation Key
❤️‍🔥 = Smut
🚩 = Additional Warnings
Chapter List
Chapter 1 - Where Winning Looks Like Losing Chapter 2 - A New Kind of Tension Chapter 3 - You've Torn Your Dress 🚩 Chapter 4 - You Might Be The Same As Me Chapter 5 - Popped, Cool, and Ready to Go Chapter 6 - I've Been Searching for a Fortified Defense Chapter 7 - The Blinding Ultra-Violence 🚩 Chapter 8 - I Just Find My Way Back ❤️‍🔥🚩 Chapter 9 - Can't Cover It Up ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 10 - Lead Me To The Ark ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 11 - The Wolves or The Ocean Rocks Chapter 12 - While My Blood's Still Flowing Chapter 13 - The Terror of Knowing Chapter 14 - Choke on Sun Chapter 15 - I Found A Martyr ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 16 - Let It Flood ❤️‍🔥 🚩 Chapter 17 - Make My Chest Stir Chapter 18 - Something In The Static ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 19 - Don't Look Back 🚩 Chapter 20 - Forget to Fall Down Chapter 21 - Some Things You Just Can't Speak About ❤️‍🔥 🚩 Chapter 22 - I Stayed In The Darkness With You Chapter 23 - Wherever You're Going ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 24 - You'll Never Be Alone ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 25 - All I Know ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 26 - I’ve Loved Everything About You That Hurts ❤️‍🔥 Chapter 27 - Just A Shot Away (11/12) Chapter 28 - Something That I'm Supposed to Be (11/19)
Bonus Footage (Standalone Chapters)
Dying’s Up to Me - A Prologue. Takes place 6ish months before Chapter 1. 🚩 Back to Here - Request! They get horny at the dining table, and Butcher takes it personally. Takes place in Chapter 14. It's So Simple - You make Ben do icebreakers. He's a little bitch about it. Takes place in Chapter 14. Just Your Time - You give Ben internet lessons. Takes place in Chapter 14. As Much As I Do - Request! Ben finds you dancing, is immediately very normal about it. Takes place after Chapter 14 and around Chapter 15. Calling Your Name - Ben's first birthday awake isn't great. Takes place in Chapter 19. ❤️‍🔥 I Skip My Pride - You share some music with Ben over text. Takes place in Chapter 22. The Only Place That I Call Home - It's team game night, and everyone is sick of you and Ben's shit. Takes place in Chapter 24. ❤️‍🔥 Can't Help Myself - Request! Ben has a breeding kink, and you're incredibly horny, so it works. Takes place in around Chapter 24 and Chapter 25. ❤️‍🔥 Anywhere Else Is Hollow - A halloween special episode! Takes place in Chapter 25. It Was Smiling Down (11/8) A Call To Motion (11/15)
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mcavoy-girl · 3 months ago
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My masterlist for my blogs mcavoy-girl and callsignmayhem
mcavoy-girl:
Loving and losing Dean Winchester x female reader
We'll be okay Dean Winchester x female reader
Stay with me Dean Winchester x female reader
Till we're grey and old Charles Xavier x female reader
Just like you Charles Xavier x female reader, Erik Lehnsherr x female reader
You son of an bitch Logan Howlett x female reader
Not broken Charles Xavier x female reader
Let me help you Charles Xavier x female reader, mentions of needles, alcohol and drugs used as medicine.
The final act of kindness/I gave them their happiness Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement
Live without shame Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement
Come back to me Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement
The life you lived Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement
callsignmayhem:
Kisses on fingertips Jake Seresin x female reader
Memories prequel/sequel/continuation to Kisses on fingertips, Jake Seresin x female reader
The letter he left you (kisses on fingertips-universe) Jake Seresin x female reader
Pictures (kisses on fingertips-universe) not a fic but pictures I made for the story
Flyboy and his darlings Jake Seresin x female reader
Others:
List of characters we need more fanfiction written about
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Also this song which I think somehow fits both "kisses on fingertips and "memories" (just my opinion)
I might edit my fics every now and then
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wildwestdean · 5 months ago
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masterlist
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dean winchester
transposition: a spell goes wrong and ends up with you and sam switching bodies. neither of you tell dean, which ends up being the greatest decision you ever made [6.3k+]
impetus: dean gets targeted by a witch while working a case, and she curses him to yearn for what he secretly loves the most. it seems to have no effect, until it's pointed out that he can't seem to stay away from you - but what happens when he tries to fight it? [9.4k+] more coming soon!
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soldier boy
sweet and sour: when you get back home after drinking a little too much, a sweeter side of ben slips out to take care of you. though you quickly learn that with him, you can't have any sweet without a little sour [3.2k+]
more to come!
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artyandink · 5 months ago
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JENSEN-A-THON
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WELCOME!
Rules:
You have to have trigger warnings on your drabbles/oneshots
No inc3st, p3dophilia, age gaps are allowed as long as one isn’t a minor, if anything is majorly outta pocket then nope sorry
Any of Jensen’s characters
You may use a section from an existing fic IF it works as a drabble
No OC inserts. (Y/N) or no mentioned names are allowed
You’re allowed same sex couples
Smut is allowed
Jensen’s Characters (That aren’t so hard to find info on):
Dean Winchester
Soldier Boy
Beau Arlen
Alec McDowell
CJ Braxton
Jason Teague
Tom Hanniger
Russell Shaw
Boaz Priestly
When is it happening?
2nd June - 31st July
List of writers participating (comment/reblog to show you’re participating):
@artyandink @k-slla @jackles010378 @angelbabyyy99 @lailawinchesterr @kayleighwinchester @anundyingfidelity @nescaveckwriter
This will be then compiled into a fic rec list, so everyone can read it. If a writer posts a drabble/oneshots, do reblog with feedback or a review to keep the flow going! The writer who posts the most drabbles/oneshots in those ten days will get a personalised oneshot written by me.
Have fun!
IMPORTANT NOTE: I will need you to tell me in the comments or by reblog, or by DMs if you’re participating!
IMPORTANT 2: Make sure to tag me in your drabbles/oneshots so I can tally!
IMPORTANT 3: You can anyways participate, I just want to have a list so I can compile the fic rec list!
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thebiggerbear · 8 months ago
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Jensen Ackles Characters Masterlist
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Dean Winchester (Supernatural)
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"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that." - You and Dean refuse to speak to one another after an argument and Sam has finally had enough.
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe." - When Sam calls to tell you that Dean is gone, you can’t accept it. Not until you visit the offline Bunker and see for yourself. …But is he really gone?
Part 2 of "Sleep"
Follow Me Into the Dark - Tragedy has struck in your life, quickly and without warning, leaving you completely devastated. As if that wasn’t bad enough, Dean Winchester rolls into town and he and his brother are starting to ask questions. Questions that you are not prepared to answer though you have a question of your own: just what the hell is Dean doing darkening your doorstep again?
when were you going to tell me - After finding out you concealed something from him on a hunt, Dean is not happy with you and he definitely does not appreciate your attempts at humor on the subject.
"You're safe now. I'm here."
Real or Not Real
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
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Soldier Boy (The Boys)
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"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that." - You’re pissed that he put himself at risk yet again.
"I took care of that asshole for you." "I don't like the sound of that." - When Ben mentions something to you in the middle of battle, your attempt at a little levity turns the conversation in a direction that probably would have been better kept off of Comms during a mission.
Part 2 of "I took care of that asshole for you."
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe." - You’re tired of running and you go to Soldier Boy for protection. He agrees to do it but not without a price.
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't." - Hughie and everyone don’t understand what you see in Soldier Boy but they also haven’t seen what you’ve seen: Ben.
"You're safe now. I'm here." - Soldier Boy has been on a ton of dangerous missions in his time, fought a lot of battles, but never did he imagine he would be undertaking the one you had just tasked him with. Shit.
Call My Name - Grace Mallory, the Boys, and the government have all warily agreed to your plan to take down Homelander. There’s just one more person to add to the operation, the very person who is necessary for any measure of the plan’s success. Can you convince him to join the team and help you defeat Homelander once and for all?
every king needs a queen - Homelander makes you an offer that you are all too happy to refuse
Keep Me Inside - When you took a job at Vought International to pay the bills, you never could have imagined just how much your life was about to change. Especially when you catch the eye of a certain Supe.
no one's the new me - Soldier Boy is the OG Supe. You goad him into proving it and get more than you bargained for…or did you?
Something Real - You had offered him the chance for something the two of you could build, something real, if he gave up the suit for good.
Thankful - It’s Father’s Day again and you have an extra special present for Ben this time around.
Where is she? - Soldier Boy only has one thought in mind when Homelander wakes him up: you.
sequel to Something Real (where SB gets his vengeance)
I've Been Waiting For You
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Beau Arlen (Big Sky)
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"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that." - He put you with Hoyt and Tonya. For the day. What the hell had he been thinking?
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe." - Your house is broken into one night when Beau wasn’t home and now you find yourself expecting it to happen again at any moment. Will you ever feel safe in your home again?
A Twist of Fate
i need your hand but i don't want to burn it - You receive a phone call letting you know a family member has passed. The news rocks your world, especially when you find yourself flying back home for the services, returning to a place you’d rather forget. As your best friend, Beau is trying to be there for you but you’re determined to go it alone. But since you’ve known him, when has Beau Arlen ever not had your back?
if you love me (don't let go)
Only Ever Holding Onto You - When Beau Arlen called and asked you to join him at the Lewis & Clark County Sheriff’s Department, you knew you should have turned him down. Sure, he made a great case for your relocation, but it was the sound of his voice that had you putting in for an immediate transfer. After all, he was worried and needed you; how could you say no? Yet, the more time you spend in Big Sky Country, the more you wonder if you should have stayed in Houston.
The Ghosts Are Coming For You - When you moved to Montana, you figured you’d be in for a much quieter, more slow-paced lifestyle compared to the big city one you had left behind. Meeting Lewis and Clark County’s youngest sheriff while working a string of murders in your new position in Homicide turns out to be anything but — especially when things start to hit a little too close to home and remind you of things you thought you’d left buried long ago.
"You're safe now. I'm here."
"I never wanted to lose you like that."
Guide Me To You
You Are My Home
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"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
Alec McDowell (Dark Angel 2000)
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"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that." - You’re looking for a way to set yourself up and blend in after breaking out of Manticore. Having heard the rumors, you seek out Max for help. In doing so, you come across someone you had never thought you’d see again.
Nothing But Killing Time - Manticore has recaptured you and this time, you’ve been assigned a breeding partner. From the moment you meet, it’s evident that neither you nor X5-494 have anything in mind other than a means of escape. Can you two come up with a plan together to break out and reclaim your freedom? Or will Manticore come between you and shatter the fragile trust you’ve built?
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe."
"You're safe now. I'm here."
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"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
Jason Teague (Smallville)
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"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that." - When another student makes an unwanted move on you, Jason’s not above flexing his assistant coach authority muscle a little to get the guy to leave you alone and send a message.
Part 2 of "I hate you"
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe." - Jason has just helped you escape the clutches of his nefarious mother. Where will you go from here now that you know the truth?
Part 2 of "Sleep"
"You're safe now. I'm here."
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
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CJ Braxton (Dawson's Creek)
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"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that." - You had only meant to call once, remaining anonymous while feeling out the whole helpline thing for yourself. Now, you talk to CJ every Friday night around the same time. When you don’t call one Friday, CJ is worried and comes looking for you which presents its own host of problems.
i won't let you go - When Jen breaks CJ’s heart, though you hadn’t planned on it, her loss quickly becomes your gain and so much more.
Something Like This - A Nor'easter hits Boston and luckily for you, you don’t have anywhere you need to be except right here, snuggled up with CJ.
Part 3 of "I hate you." & Something Like This
"You're safe now. I'm here."
Don't Give Up On Me
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
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"Sleep. I'll keep you safe."
Tom Hanniger (My Bloody Valentine 2009)
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"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that." - You went to visit Tom in the mines for a little Valentine’s Day fun. Who knew that one decision would lead to everything that’s happened? Will you be able to help Tom or will he be lost to you forever?
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe." - Tom has taken you hostage. This is not the Tom you knew and fell in love with. Unable to escape, can you get him to trust you and maybe even reach him?
"You're safe now. I'm here."
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
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Jake Gray (Devour 2005)
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nothing to win and nothing left to lose
You're Mine
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe."
"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that."
"You're safe now. I'm here."
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"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't." - When you go with Jake to visit his mom, you encounter a young woman who inexplicably sets you on edge and has you sticking that much closer to the boy who has your heart.
Boaz Priestly (Ten Inch Hero)
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"Sleep. I'll keep you safe."
"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that."
"You're safe now. I'm here."
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
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Russell Shaw (Tracker 2024)
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Close Enough - When you’d met the Shaws at the morgue the day before, you thought that had been the end of it and you wouldn’t need to see one Shaw brother in particular again. Little did you know that Colter was about to once again ask for your help and not only would you be forced to see Russell again but things were about to change drastically for the both of you.
Closer - Now that Russell knows the truth about you, there isn’t anything he won’t do to try to get you out. Even if it means he might have to move up the timeline of his exit strategy earlier than planned.
Off Limits - When Reenie sends you to assist Colter with whatever he needs after getting arrested for breaking into a morgue in Virginia, you meet his older brother Russell for the first time. There’s some flirting and definitely a mutual attraction there before you Colter sends you off. Little do you know at the time that Colter has warned Russell that you’re off limits and that Russell has no intention of listening to said warning.
So Close - You meet Colter and Russell at the morgue to help them gain access. Had you known how this was really going to go, you might have pushed Colter’s call to voicemail.
"You're safe now. I'm here." Part 1 - You’ve been taken hostage and Russell is part of the unit sent in to retrieve you.
"You're safe now. I'm here." Part 2
"Sleep. I'll keep you safe."
"I hate you." "You have a weird way of showing that."
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't."
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Within Limits (sequel to Off Limits)
Michael!Dean (Supernatural)
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Let Me Set Your World on Fire - While on a hunt, you all get stuck in an abandoned cabin in the woods due to a snowstorm that comes out of nowhere. It’s cold as hell (Cas’ fact checking not withstanding) and both you and Dean are trying to fight off the icy temperatures. When Cas offers his coat to Dean, in usual Michael fashion, the archangel offers you something bigger and more to his liking than a simple article of clothing to keep you warm.
This Time The World Burns and You With It
"You're safe now. I'm here."
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Demon!Dean (Supernatural)
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"You're safe now, I'm here."
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AU!Dean (Supernatural)
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"You're safe now, I'm here."
Endverse!Dean (Supernatural)
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MOC!Dean (Supernatural)
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Dean Smith (Supernatural)
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Huntercorp!Dean (Supernatural)
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Purgatory!Dean (Supernatural)
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"You're safe now, I'm here."
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Ben | X5-493 (Dark Angel 2000)
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"You're safe now, I'm here."
Jensen Ackles RPF
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Come Pick Up Your Ghosts - Jensen left a little…something behind on his last visit when he was in town. Something you are urgently asking him to come back and retrieve so you can know peace once more.
i want better for you...what's better for you than me? - Your heart is broken and you’re currently going through a divorce that didn’t have to happen. Will you give Jensen the chance to explain everything that came about from that one night in Rome when you weren’t there?
Trust Me
"What do you see in him?" "Everything you don't." - Jensen says something at a con that initially bothers you that prompts a conversation where you admit that there are certain parts of his job that you could easily do without, not sure how that’s going to impact your friendship moving forward.
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Jason Todd/Red Hood (Batman: Under the Red Hood)
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"You're safe now, I'm here."
Bruce Wayne/Batman (Batman: The Long Halloween)
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Mark Meachum (Countdown)
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Jensen Taglist: @samanddeaninatrenchcoat; @deansbbyx
dividers by @firefly-graphics
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pamwritessometimes · 19 days ago
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Tuesday’s Gone Masterlist
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Russell Shaw x reader
Summary: When the police does little to no help to find your missing daughter, you are forced to contact Colter Shaw. What you don’t expect is how his investigation will reveal secrets about both your past and your daughter’s, in ways you never imagined.
🤍 Chapter 1
🤍 Chapter 2
🤍 Chapter 3
🤍 Chapter 4
🤍 Chapter 5 coming soon…
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deanbrainrotwritings · 9 months ago
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month of love 2024 | MASTERLIST
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most of these will be 18+ stories that include sexual or dark themes, individual warnings will be added for each one
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˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 3 FEBRUARY
dream boy [smut, 2.9k]
description — bathrooms can be interesting sometimes.
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 5 FEBRUARY
my you [smut, 1.9k]
description — part v of gimme half. the first valentine’s day with dean winchester and he is just absolutely adorable… for like the first half of this fic, the other half is filthy.
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 9 FEBRUARY
hero of the half-truth [smut, 3.7k]
description — you can’t decide whether it’s a punishment or not when you go to see soldier boy knowing that he’s trying to keep you safe from everything in his life
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 12 FEBRUARY
hand of blood [fluff, 1.0k]
description — after being forced to be something you didn’t know you were, Dean comforts you as you start learning to live with your new abilities.
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 14 FEBRUARY
keep the lights on [smut, 2.9k]
description — I think we should all understand and accept the fact that dean loves women of all shapes, colours, and sizes. because he is a king. my beloved.
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 21 FEBRUARY
demonology and heartache [smut, 4.9k]
description — dean is a devout catholic and has never known a life outside the church, all his resolve is broken by the temptation of a hellish seductress.
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 24 FEBRUARY
same book but never the same page [fluff, 5.6k]
description — part III of the love letter collection. still dreamwalking. chasing after someone who can destroy worlds. and dean is jealous of his variants. what could go wrong?
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taglist
main masterlist
dean winchester masterlist
soldier boy masterlist
jensen ackles masterlist
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© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED TO DEANBRAINROTWRITINGS 
do not steal, plagiarise, translate, or republish my work on another platform
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jays-bonnie-on-the-side · 6 months ago
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𝐋𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐀 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐤 - 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞
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PAIRING : dean winchester x original female character
STORY SUMMARY : in series masterlist
CHAPTER WARNINGS : age-gap. pining. teasing. underaged flirting. language. violence. gaslighting. gun play. murder. description of death.
A/N: i've had this series replaying in my mind for over a year. i'm so happy to share with everyone and i hope you enjoy it as much as i do. i've got big plans for this story! thank you all for your support, feedback (preferably good) is always appreciated!
check out the teaser if you haven’t already.
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Maricela's POV
I've known the Winchester brothers for four years now. I was fifteen when they visited Kenosha, Wisconsin, on a hunt for a Lamia. I remember hearing the roar of the Impala's engine pull into the gas station before it drove to the opposite side of the pump I was using. The motor's purr cuts just before the driver's side door creaks open, freeing a tall and handsome specimen. Once he reappeared from behind the pump, I did a double take. I couldn't help but stare at the man who wielded the most beautiful green eyes, trying to place where I'd seen them before. The longer I studied his chiseled face, the more familiar it seemed.
The man noticed my gaze and turned to look at me. He gave me a small smile, and I realized what I had been doing. I tear my attention away while my cheeks begin to heat, embarrassed.
"I'm sorry," I say, focusing on the ground. "You just look really familiar."
"Oh, I don't know about that," his deep voice responded. "I'm not from around here."
I nodded, taking in his words, but felt in my gut that he wasn't telling the entire truth. Instead of thinking too hard about it, I push it to the back of my brain and look at his sweet ride.
"Pretty nice car you got there." I compliment.
"Thanks," he says before flashing me a charming smile.
I was instantly mesmerized by him. I had no intention of ceasing our conversation in hopes of becoming closer to him while I had the chance. Who wouldn't do the same? Regardless of any age difference.
He looked away and stared into the distance, getting lost in his head. I clear my throat before speaking again.
"What year is it?" I ask, trying to keep the conversation alive.
"'67." He answers proudly.
I ask, genuinely curious, "What kind of engine does it have?"
A slow smile spreads across his face as if the question doesn't get asked often. He nods for me to follow him, and I smile as my plan succeeds. He pops the hood from inside the car before walking towards the front of the Impala. As I pass the driver's side door, the man sitting inside gives me a tight-lipped smile. I give him one in return, then turn my attention back to the gorgeous man as he props the hood.
"Impressive. Let me guess—this baby pushes out 460 hps." I comment, staring at the redone engine.
"461. How did you...?" He trails off. I catch him staring at me in my peripheral vision. I turn to the attractive man and can't help but smile even wider at the amazement shining bright in his eyes. He thrusts his hand out and says, "I'm Dean."
I take his hand and squeeze, giving him a firm handshake. "I'm Mari."
"Ma-dee...?" He repeats in question.
I giggle at his uncertainty and nod at the correct pronunciation of my Spanish name. "Yes, sir."
"What's a girl like you know about engines?" He smirks, leaning against his now-closed hood.
"I know a thing or two." I shrug nonchalantly. I heard the gas pump jerk, indicating that my tank was full. "I should get that."
I turn to walk back before his voice stops me.
"Hey, uh—you wouldn't happen to know where the nearest motel is, do you?"
"Wow, Dean, I'm flattered, but I like to be 'wined and dined' before we sixty-nine." I causally joke.
His eyes widen with shock as the blush rises to his cheeks, his jaw dropping slightly. I found it arduous to keep my smirk hidden after his overt reaction. His head shakes violently, his hands rising in defense before speaking.
"What? No, I didn't mean—I don't want to—Not that you're not—" His green eyes quickly skim every inch of my body. "I'm not saying you don't look good 'cause wow—but I just—"
This man, who exudes confidence, getting so flustered over my words was unexpected. I couldn't help but stop his self-torture with a laugh.
"I'm just fucking with you."
Relief washes over his features before letting out a large breath. After a chuckle, he says, "You're good, really had me going there."
"Well, if you're this easy to rile up with words, I can only imagine how well you'd respond to actions." I smile at the vulgar things I had in mind.
To say I surprised even myself with my comments is an understatement. I have never been confident enough to speak to any guy like this. Let alone one this jaw-droppingly sexy, but he definitely brought that side out of me.
A mischievous smirk plays on his lips as he gets closer. "You've got a dirty little mouth there, sweetheart."
"You going to clean it out for me?" I say seductively before sinking my teeth into my bottom lip.
Dean's eyes widen again, but he tries covering it with a huge grin. He opens his mouth to reply but gets cut off by the man in his car attempting to mask the words "jail bait" with a cough. I can't help but laugh; he wasn't wrong. The man standing in front of me turns red once more.
"Why don't I give you those directions?" I offer, hoping to ease the awkwardness.
He nods, giving me a shy smile. He thanked me after I gave him the information.
"No problem." I walk to my car and grab the nozzle from my gas tank. I put it back into its machine while he does the same. "I hope to see you around."
He winks before I slip into my front seat. I smile at his small but powerful gesture and pray the last words I spoke to him become true.
And they did, just not in the way I would've imagined. What I didn't expect was to see a monster—a real monster—attack someone important to me. Two FBI agents tracked me down in my hometown for an interview. And just my luck, the agents happened to be the gentlemen I met earlier. Their faces were just as surprised to see me as I was them.
A knock sounded on the front door. I pause my movie before surreptitiously peeking out of the living room window that faces the street. My eyes widen as I see a familiar classic car parked outside my house. My heart rate spiked, knowing that the Impala could only belong to the man I met just the other day. Panicking, I push myself off the couch and run to the bathroom.
I look in the mirror and see a nightmare staring back. My eyes were red and puffy, and my hair was in shambles. I heard another knock, but this time louder. With no time to run a brush through my bird's nest of hair, I groan in frustration. I drag myself out of the bathroom before the rapid pounding begins against the front door.
"Coming!" I yell while combing my fingers through my thickly tangled brunette curls.
I stand just before the door and take a moment to breathe. After straightening the sweats I chose to lounge in, I curse myself for not being presentable at a time like this. I suck in a breath before reaching for the door handle, bracing myself for the judgment and embarrassment that was guaranteed to come my way. In one quick motion, I swing open the wooden door to see the two familiar, tall, handsome men standing before me.
Their eyes became wide as they recognized who I was. I self-consciously sink into my hoodie, shy from their attention.
"Mari..." says Dean, just as surprised to see me.
"What are you guys doing here?" I ask, confused.
"We're uh, we're FBI agents. Just came to ask Maricela a few questions." The gentleman with long hair answers. "Is she home?"
"That's me," My eyebrows knit together. "Wait a minute, you're FBI agents?" I ask, not believing them as I eye up their suits.
"Yes." Dean and I locked eyes, and I could tell from his facial expression that he was hiding something.
"Let me see your badges." The words spilled out of my mouth.
They exchanged a look as if they didn't know what to do. They fumbled over their words before I cut them off.
"Well," I cross my arms. "Let's see it."
"Look, I don't think we need to—" Dean starts.
"Then you're not coming in. Plain and simple." I sass, standing my ground to the suspicious strangers.
Sighing in defeat, they pull their badges from their inner suit pockets. I push my glasses up the bridge of my nose before taking their badges for a closer look. My eyes thoroughly examine their IDs, noticing an off detail, realizing why they were, or at least Dean was, hesitant about showing their badges. I hand them back before recrossing my arms.
"So... Jimmy, huh?" 'Dean' looks at me in confusion before the realization dawns upon his face. "I recalled you introducing yourself as 'Dean.'"
"Well, uh..." I see him struggle for an excuse. "I go by my middle name. Each time someone called for 'Jimmy,' my dad and I didn't know who they were referring to. So yeah, I—uh, I go by Dean."
I give him a 'you've got to be joking' look. He clears his throat and smiles, trying to play it cool.
"Right..." I stare at his face, hoping to magically remember where I knew him from—other than the day we met. Knowing my luck wasn't great, I brushed it off once again.
"May we come in?" Mr. Robert Plant asks.
With the faintest nod, I step aside to let them pass. Once they were in, I closed the door and led them to the living room. They settled on the couch and nervously smiled at me as I sat across from them.
"Are your parents home?" 'Dean' asks.
I shake my head. "No, they're not. But I'd rather get this done and over with, so please make this quick."
They nod before starting. "All right, tell us how you knew the victim. Then, walk us through what you saw last night."
I take a shaky breath, trying to steady my nerves. "Luke and I had been friends for a while. I had the biggest crush on him. I figured he only liked me as a friend, so when he asked me to dinner, how could I have said no? He wanted to drive down to Kenosha and try this new restaurant."
"So, it was a date?" 'Dean' questioned.
"I guess you could call it that. Everything was going great until I stepped away to use the restroom. When I came back... Luke was with another girl." I replay the awful memory. "She was all over him. I was furious! Why ask me out, then allow some random chick to finish our date? It just didn't make any sense. But I refused to stay and watch, so I left..."
My voice began to waver as the emotions I felt the night before came rushing back.
"I called my best friend to come pick me up. While I waited, I decided to go back and confront him, giving him a piece of my mind. That's when I found him..." I hesitate, fearing they wouldn't believe the truth of what I witnessed.
I didn't expect them to, especially since the local cops didn't. For two sole reasons: One. Who ever listens to the crazy person who says monsters are real? Two. I was a minor, and no one takes you seriously if you're under the age of 18—even then.
"Found him..?" 'Dean' asks, sitting at the edge of his seat. My eyes found his, and just for a moment, I felt safe in the comforting pools of green.
My lips part, contemplating what to say next. Hesitation got the best of me, so I settled on; "Dead."
They nod, taking in my statement. "You told the police you saw a monster kill Luke."
I give a dry laugh before nodding in agreement, my gaze wandering. "Yeah, I did."
"Is there anything more you can tell us about this so-called 'monster' you saw?" Robert questions.
"What's the point? You're not gonna believe me. No one else does." I shrug.
"Hey," 'Dean' made it a point for me to make eye contact with him before saying, "We just want to help. So, try us."
I bit the inside of my cheek while frantically searching his beautiful green irises for clarity. His brows furrowed, woven with hope yet silently pleading to trust him. So, with a deep breath, I confessed. "When I went back, he—uh, he was on the ground, and she was... eating him. She looked human, but her face—it changed."
"Changed? Changed how?" Robert eagerly inquired.
"I swear it warped into something snake-like."
The men exchanged glances before fixing their attention back on me. "How did she escape?"
"She heard other people coming near us and ran off. I tried running after her, but she turned a corner and was gone. I called the cops but not before seeing the huge gaping hole in Luke's chest." I numbly say as I stare off into thin air, as his lifeless and mutilated body flashes behind my eyes.
"All I know is whatever that thing is, ain't human. She's a monster, and I swear, she's gonna get what's coming to her." I seethe.
After persuading me to tell the truth, they tried convincing me what I witnessed, what that monster did to my friend, wasn't real.
"Look, Mari," 'Dean' started. "Forget what you think you saw, all right? Cause monsters aren't real. The sooner you realize that the sooner you can cope with your loss."
"My partner's right. It's easy to think that some—" Robert lifts his fingers to add air quotes. "—'monster' could be responsible for your boy friend's death, but the FBI can assure you, there's no such thing. In certain traumatic events, the witness can alter reality the more they try to remember what happened. It could just be that you have an overactive imagination. It happens all the time, especially in kids. I think that's what's going on here."
I glare at them in disbelief. How dare they come into my house and feed me lies—telling me I have an 'overactive imagination.' As natural as breathing, I begin expressing my anger.
"I don't care who you are—I know what I saw. This thing will continue to kill people until it's caught. So why don't you quit wasting your time selling me something I ain't buyin' and find the damn thing!" I say each and every word louder than the last, anger fueling the fire they only fanned higher.
Silence fell between us. It was evident that my outburst caught them off guard, but I couldn't care less. Time and energy were being wasted by trying to convince me otherwise. I take a deep breath and collect my thoughts before getting up from the couch to walk out of the living room.
"Now, if there's nothing else you need from me—" I say while opening the front door. The men take my hint and begin walking towards me. Robert delivers a stiff smile before walking out of the house, leaving me alone with 'Dean.'
"Thank you for your time." He mutters before exiting my home.
"Hey, Page," I called just after he walked down the porch steps. He pivots to meet my gaze. "If you don't find this thing, I will."
With a nod, he turns back around and heads for his car. As soon as they drove away, I threw myself into research. I couldn't shake the feeling that I knew these two from somewhere.
I soon found myself down a rabbit hole.
"Oh shit..." I murmur, finding what I was looking for but not what I expected. Then, it all dawned on me.
Sam and Dean Winchester.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin. That's where I knew them from. They came in January of 2007 and took hostages in a bank before escaping, dressed as SWAT agents. They were a huge story, especially since they were wanted for other heinous crimes. Those of which included—credit card fraud, breaking and entering, disturbing a crime scene, impersonation of law enforcement, assaulting an officer, breaking out of jail, mass murder, kidnapping, arson, grand theft auto, grave desecration, and lastly, desecration of corpses. I felt sick to my stomach, knowing I was alone with them. Yet, all I could think about was what they wanted and why they didn't hurt me if they had such a rap. My mind kept racing and racing until I made a plan.
After an hour, I had a theory on what kind of monster killed my friend. So, I decided to confront the mystery men and pray they really were here to help. After changing, I traveled down to the city where they stayed.
I pulled up to the motel and braved myself with a deep breath before exiting my car. I clutched the gun in my purse as I walked over to their room. With determination, I knocked on their door. My heart hammered against my rib cage, wondering if what I was doing was a mistake. Dean opened the door, and his eyes instantly widened. I brush past him and walk into the middle of the room while taking a quick scan, ensuring it was just us three before turning to face them. Without wasting a beat, I jump into business.
"I know who you are," I assert with as much confidence as my voice could muster. "Sam and Dean Winchester."
Their faces dropped at the mention of their real identities.
"Now," I begin. "I want the truth. Who are you."
"Well, if you know our names, you should already know who we are," says Sam.
"I read what the articles wrote about you, even what law enforcement officials have tried charging you with before you were 'killed.' Yet, here you are: alive." I take the loaded gun out of my purse and aim at the brothers. "So tell me, who are you."
The men raised their hands in surrender, no doubt startled to see me wield a deadly weapon. What'd they expect? That I'd walk into the lion's den unarmed? I might be foolish, but I'm not stupid.
"Woah, woah. Mari, put the gun away. It's not a toy." Dean said, taking a step closer.
"No shit, Sherlock." I steady my trembling hands. "Now, somebody better start talking, or I'll start using this thing."
"Okay! Okay!" Dean shouts after hearing the click of the safety release from the trigger. "We'll tell you. Just please, put it down."
I hesitate but lower the weapon at a 45-degree angle, not ready to put it away completely. "You're right. I'm Dean Winchester, this is my brother, Sam. But we're not what everyone says we are. We're... we're hunters."
My brows narrow in confusion. "Hunters?"
"We hunt monsters. We try to save as many people as we can. It's our family business."
I take a deep breath before saying, "I thought you said monsters weren't real."
The brothers seemed to relax when I put the safety back on before shoving the gun back into my purse.
"We had to. It was for your own good. You're too young to learn about the things that go bump in the night." Dean says before sitting at the table near the window, across from Sam.
"I appreciate it, but I can make that decision on my own."
"If you really want to know, it was a Lamia that killed Luke," Sam says, trying to ease the tension between his brother and me.
I nod. "Yeah, I know."
Sam furrowed his eyebrows. "You know?"
"Yeah," I pull out the folded paper I printed earlier. He gets up from his chair, walking closer so I can hand it to him. "I did some research and came across it. Figured it could be a possibility."
"So why did you come here?" Dean asked.
I shifted my eyes to meet his. "Because if those allegations were true, you would've killed me. And you didn't... You came to me, looking for clues to—to help. Bad guys don't do that."
I watch as his eyes soften. He gives me the tiniest smile before nodding.
"Now, how do we kill this thing?" I ask.
"No, no, no." Dean gets up from his chair and walks over.
"What? I'm going to help you kill it." I declare.
"I don't think so, sweetheart." He quickly towers over me. "Leave it to the adults."
"You don't scare me, Dean Winchester," I say confidently.
The truth is, I was—just a little. His lips parted as if he was going to say something back but he didn't.
"I think it's best if we take care of this," Sam interjects.
I fought with them long and hard until I finally wore them down. They agreed I could come with them as long as I stayed out of the way.
We ascended the steps of the church and pushed the heavy doors open. The men led the way before stopping in front of the altar. I gasped once I saw the priest's dead body lying on the floor with his throat cut open.
"Damn it!" Dean cursed. "She got to him first."
"What do we do?" I ask, frightened.
"Call Bobby," said Sam before the Lamia made her way from the back room.
Dean whipped out his phone and dialed whomever Sam referred to.
"What's another way to kill a Lamia?" he eagerly asks. He looks to the priest lying at his feet before saying, "It didn't pan out. What's Plan B?"
While Dean took instructions, the Lamia charged toward us. She dodged Sam's punch before grabbing his clothes and flinging him across the room. He hit the pillar before shouting for his brother. Ignoring me, she runs over with supernatural speed and snatches him away from the column that kept him upright. Dean sprints to the back room just before the Lamia throws the tall man to the floor like he was nothing.
She then straddles him, wrapping one hand around his neck before hissing. Her fangs and forked tongue were on display, just like they were the first time I saw her. Fear freezes me in place, trapping me in the memory of Luke's murder. She uses her unoccupied hand to press her fingertips against Sam's chest as if she were going to plunge it into his body. He tries prying her hands away with no luck. The monster begins to dig her quickly, growing claws into the man, forcing out a pained cry. The sound of his torture pierces through my comatose state, snapping me out of it.
Without second-guessing, I feel my body rush towards the monster, tackling her off the youngest Winchester. I quickly crawl over and grab the knife near Sam. I stand, holding the large blade in front of me. She pants heavily as a slow smile spreads across her face. The same one that burned in my memory that fateful day.
That was enough for me to lunge the large knife at her. She quickly dodged and tried attacking back, only for me to do the same. I finally land a strike on her arm, slicing her skin open. Yet, just as fast as it appeared, I watched her heal. The sudden realization that she couldn't be weakened easily had hit me like a truck. She took the opportunity to jump me, knocking the knife out of my hand. We wrestled on the floor before her strength dominated.
"I remember you." Her voice spoke. "You're the girlfriend."
"Shut up." I hiss while trying and failing to push her off of me. Her taunting laughs echo off the church's walls.
"I've got to say, your boy toy tasted amazing." She adds to the torment. A fresh set of tears fills my eyes. I turn my head and see the knife not too far away. I look at her again while I reach for the knife. "Don't worry, sweetie. He didn't suffer... that much."
My fingertips lightly grazed the edge of the handle. With one last stretch, I grasped onto it, and with one swift motion, I jammed the blade into the monster's throat.
"I said—" Her eyes widen in shock before I yank the knife out. "Shut up!"
She stumbled off, allowing me to get away. I push myself off the ground and run towards Sam, still lying on the floor.
"C'mon." I pull him up with all my strength before shifting some of his weight onto me.
We stumble to the back room where Dean was with the Lamia on our asses. Once we were in the kitchen, Dean tossed what seemed to be herbs out of the bowl he held at the evil creature. She flinched as if it had stung while Dean pulled the stove away from the wall. The monster fixed her eyes on the older Winchester, ready to pounce. I threw myself in her path before she—very easily— flung me out of the way. I groaned in pain as I tried to sit up. Sam followed my actions, only for him too to be cast aside.
"Fire in the hole!" Dean shouted before lighting the gas that seeped out of its line.
We watch as the Lamia burns to a crisp while listening to her violent shrieks. Once she was dead, Dean cut the gas, putting out the fire. My chest rises and falls, trying to calm down yet attempting to register everything that just happened. Dean walks in front of me and offers me a hand. I hesitantly accept before he pulls me off the floor.
"Are you all right?" he asks.
I nod with reassurance before Sam walks over to us. "I'm fine."
"It's over now." Dean rubs my back. "She can't hurt anybody else."
After the hunt, they took me out to dinner. It was less eating, at least for me, and more them giving me the talk about all that is dangerously real in the world. It goes without saying I became a hunter that day. Once I turned 18, I made it a full-time job. As much as Dean hated the fact that I fell into hunting and as much as he tried to stop me, I would help them on cases if we were near one another. After hunts, we always found time to hang out. They became my closest and most trusted friends, family even. We were always there for each other, especially at our lowest. Sam was the big brother I never had, while Dean was the crush I never seemed to get over.
Since the day I met him, my feelings for the older Winchester have only grown stronger. Each moment spent with him was bittersweet, knowing I was so close yet so far away from where I craved to be. But anything was better than nothing at all. Even with Sam's year-long encouragement, I refused to tell his brother how I felt in fear of rejection. The timing was another reason I hadn't confessed my undying love as each Big Bad became worse than the last. Things got a little more complicated when every angel fell from Heaven only to receive worse news when I called Dean to question 'The Global Meteor Shower.'
"Mari," Dean's hoarse voice spoke. "It's Sam... He's in the hospital."
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lilousmustaches · 18 days ago
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Always keep fighting
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Warnings: Depressive and insecurity thoughts.
Notes: I was always afraid of naming one of my stories "Always keep fighting" because i used to think that it had to be perfect. I think this one earned it gracefully. You have my heart in it. Rewatching Supernatural 10 years after and all of it just making the same sense to me as when i was just a kid... gave me the confirmation that i'm always going to have where to come back to. Thank you.
Summary: A very meaningful intimate conversation with the one who helped you overcome your depression many years ago. Jared Padalecki.
Platonic!Jared Padalecki x Reader / Jensen Ackles x Reader
You breathed out tired, closing your eyes feeling the sun and a slight breeze hit your face. Billie Eilish’s voice was playing max in your AirPods isolating you from the noises around like that would give you some peace of mind. 
You were in the middle of filming a season of Supernatural and honestly your life was great. Expect it wasn’t. Well… it was really, nothing really bad was happening, you had an incredible job, amazing friends, amazing fans, there was no drama. But the stress was winning you over and you could feel yourself slowly drifting away into a dark place again, just like when you were younger and what looked like a innocent wave of sadness, turned into 3 years of anti depressives. You heard once that when you have depression one time, it never go away. Not completely. You live your life “sober”, but if you don’t watch it out, any trigger can throw you into the pit once more. 
But it was adult life right? How could you escape the stress of having to do a house moving, working really hard for too many hours, being rejected for a job that you really wanted, sleeping with a coworker who you were in love with and he disappearing after… Normal adult things. There wasn’t no time to cry about it while listening to Billie Eilish. 
You opened your eyes when felt a presence besides you, and you took of your AirPods when saw Jared installing himself near you, in the bench below a tree that was located in a quiet spot in the supernatural set. He wasn’t looking at you, he was looking straight ahead like everything was normal. 
“Hi Jar.” You said still a little confused but waiting to see what this was about. 
“Hi (Y/N)” He said simply still looking ahead. “What were you listening to?” 
“New Billie’s album.” You said with a little smile and Jared finally looking at you with an excited face, he was wearing his grey beanie and a white hoodie. 
“It’s so good right?” He said making you chuckle. 
“Yeah…” You answered frowning your eyebrows. “What are you doing here Jar? I thought you didn’t even had scenes today.” 
“Had some audio problems I had to solve for that forest scene.” He explained and turned his attention straight ahead again. “And thought it would be a good opportunity to check on you.” 
“Check on me?” You asked laughing a bit confused. “You see me practically everyday” 
“Yeah, that’s exactly why I knew we had to talk.” He said turning more serious and your heart started to sunk in your chest. “I know you (Y/N). For real.”
You sighed giving up on trying to hide, Jared was one of your best friends and you two always understood each other very well. That included noticing each other’s mood swings and knowing all about the other’s personal life’s. You stayed quiet for a few seconds before breathing out. 
“I didn’t get that part that I really wanted.” You admitted feeling almost ashamed of saying out loud, sensing a bitter taste in your mouth. It was the main role for an adaptation of a book that you loved, and you felt like you were the perfect person for it. Apparently not. 
“I’m sorry (Y/N), I know how excited you were.” He said quietly putting his arm around your shoulder to give a squeeze. “Did they tell you why?” 
“Nothing concrete.” You struggled. “Random excuses and pre written messages.” 
“That sucks.” He agreed and made a long pause. “But it was just another project, other ones will appear and besides… it would mess up your schedule with Supernatural!”
You rolled your eyes and looked at him with a little smile. 
“Jared we both know Supernatural is coming to an end. Everybody is moving on, thinking about what to do next. You’re already writing your project, hell, Jensen is in L.A right now signing contracts for The Boys.” You said and saw him struggling on what to say. He knew you were right. You entered the Supernatural cast many years ago and it was like a dream coming true. Your career got some much better, the working environment was everything you could ever ask for, you met your best friends and had incredible fans. Being a female character in the show, you didn’t think you would last that much. But you did and you were happy about it. But all the things in life get to a point when you start wanting more, and now, knowing that Supernatural has to end, you found yourself lost. Stagnated. Scared what would happen to your career after this. You were a few years younger than J2 and thought the industry would be open to welcome you, but wasn’t at all what was happening. 
“(Y/N) we still have, at least, one year before we will be really done with Supernatural. That gives you more than enough time to figure it out.” He said like it was obvious. 
“Jar, I know” You said with a sad smile looking at him. “All the rationalized things you were going to say to me, already crossed my mind. I know everything is technically ok. I’m just…” You stopped yourself sighing, gathering the courage to admit it. “I’m just sad.”  
Jared looked at you with a suffered expression and you saw for a split second a look of surprise in his face.
“I don’t want to seem ungrateful to the universe, God, or whatever there is out there.” You continued making him open a small smile. “I know I have time, I just moved to a better apartment, I should be thankful. But I’m just so sad. I don’t even know how to explain it.” 
“I understand it.” He said sincerely looking straight into your eyes, giving you all of his attention. “The guilt that comes with having everything great around you and feeling all of this. Believe me, I do.” Jared said and you knew what he was talking about. About his depressed phase that gave life to all of the campaigns. You two shared a lot of conversations in that period, specially because you had history as well.  “I noticed you were not acting like yourself these past days, I was waiting for you to come talk to me, like you always had.” 
You looked away again feeling a bit ashamed. 
“I didn’t feel like talking.” 
“(Y/N).” He said turning his body to face you, making you look at him again. “There’s nothing wrong with feeling like this. You were one of the people who helped the most when I was depressed. You remember what you would say? That it wasn’t my fault, it was just literally a chemical default in my brain. That’s what depression is. A sickness that affects our brains. You passed through a lot of stress these last weeks, it’s completely understandable the way you’re feeling.” Jared said serious squeezing your shoulder. You closed your eyes to stop yourself from crying.
“I just feel like I’m not enough.” You admitted and finally let one tear drop. Jared stayed in silence, making you open your eyes seeing him with a hard expression looking at you like he trying to read you.
“There is another reason why you’re feeling like this?” He asked and you looked down, wondering if you should tell him or not. 
“Hmm I kinda got ghosted?” You said and saw him raise an eyebrow. “Well, no. I know the guy is super busy right now, I don’t blame him. But there’s a little voice in my head telling that it was the perfect timing to get out of the situation and not give me further explanation that he in fact.. don’t want me that way.” 
“Are we talking about Jensen?” Jared asked in a funny way and laughed when saw your surprised face. “(Y/N), I’m sorry if you didn’t want me to know but he told me that you guys slept together after that night we were in his house…” 
“Yeah, I should have figured this out.” You said allowing yourself to chuckle, running your hand over your face. “So yeah, this finally happened…” 
“Finally!” He exclaimed happily trowing his hands in the air. 
You and Jensen were always unfinished business. When you entered the series, you were young, single and adventurous and it didn’t take long to start crushing on Jensen. Hard. The kind of crush you weren’t even functioning right when he was around. Looking at it right now, maybe it was in that moment that your bond with Jared started to grow, he was always your confident. But none of it mattered, because Jensen… wasn’t single. And eventually you got over it, it was never going to happen so why was the point of growing expectations. Until Jensen wasn’t in a relationship anymore, there were flirts here and there, what of course didn’t last long because you were already meeting someone. And for years and years it was like that, you were simply never single at the same time. When all of that changed some months ago, when the two of you ended long last relationships. But it was really two weeks before that it all turned very real. 
Flashback on
You had  just shooted the mid season finale and man, you were tired. Everyone was going to get 1 week away from filming, but that didn’t mean vacation days. You were in the middle of an, very overwhelming, apartment moving in Vancouver and in the end of the week, you had a trip planned to Chicago to participate in the first day of a Supernatural Convention. The boys were going to get a second week off to attend to more appointments, but the directors wanted you, Misha and other secondary characters to advance the maximum of scenes possible. 
To celebrate and just cool off for a while, Jensen invited you, Jared and Misha to eat some pizza and drink some beers in his place. In the next day, he and Misha were already going to travel to L.A and Jared to Austin, to see his family. 
“So it’s already late and I need some sleep before catching that plane.” Misha said getting up of the chair he was in. “Have a safe fight you guys, and (Y/N) see you on Friday?” He asked and you nodded giving him a small smile. He was going to be your pair to the Chicago Convention, and the two of you would come back together to Vancouver, not even crossing paths with J2 because there was going to attend just the third day of #SpnChicago.
“Yeah, actually I’m going to enjoy the lead and get going as well.” Jared said sighing getting up, slapping hands with Jensen and then turning to you. “You comin’ also?”  
You didn’t want to go actually. It has been ages since you last went out with them like that and it was the first time in days that you were able to get away from your problems. You looked at Jensen to see what the thought and caught he already looking at you, denying with his head. 
“Nah (Y/N), we still have that wine you gave me for my birthday to drink.” Jensen said getting up from the couch you were in, to open the door for the boys. “Stay as long as you want.”
“I think I’m to stay.” You agreed. “Have a safe fight guys.” 
With all of the goodbyes being said, Jensen closed the door of his apartment immediately disappearing into the kitchen. He came back with two glasses of red wine, extending one to you while he returned to his previous place, sitting with his whole body turned to you and you did the same.
“I can’t believe you still didn’t drink that.” You chuckled. 
“Well, of course not! It was your gift, nothing more fair than drinking it with you.” He said like it was obvious, extending his glass. “Cheers” 
Half bottle after, you both were already tipsy, laughing about everything and somehow, closer to each other than before. You spoke about the series, about the bittersweet feeling of it ending. About how excited he was for Soldier Boy and at the same time nervous. He listened to you speak about the role you were auditioning for and gave you his whole support. You even gossiped a little, about Misha’s divorce. After that, somehow the conversation got to the point of relationships and you both shared a lot of thoughts and insecurities about it. 
Jensen smiled when the conversation got to a pause, letting his hand fall to rest in your arm that was leaning in the sofa. You hold your breath when felt his thumb slowly starting to caress you and your belly suddenly got cold when he started to stare at you.
“I just can’t believe that we’re finally single at the same time.” Jensen chuckled in a hoarse voice. You bite your lip, resting your glass into the center table and saw him doing the same thing. 
“That makes a difference?” You challenged him seeing him grin. 
“You know it does, sweetheart.” He said putting a strand of hair behind your ear and you wondered if he could hear the sound of your heart beating. “I always knew you had a crush on me.” 
“I did not.” You said faking a false indignation and you both laughed. “I actually thought it was the other way around.” 
“Guilty.” He admitted making you gulp. “All of those years… us trying to move on from each other. And look at us now… single at our thirties, at the same place we would be in since the start if we weren’t so damn stubborns.” 
You stayed in silence for a few seconds, staring each other like you could see each other’s souls. His eyes were in a dark green filled with lust and when you saw his glance lowering to your lips, you knew you couldn’t take any more of that.
“Kiss me Jensen.” 
“You have no idea on how many years I’ve waited for you to say that.” 
And you didn’t had to ask twice.
XXxxXXXxxxXXXxxXX
You opened your eyes confused still in a dark room, and in a very comfortable bed. You glanced at your phone in the bedside table seeing it was already 12h. The memories from last night started to invade your mind, making you sit up in a rush and frown when you noticed that Jensen wasn’t there. 
Oh right, he had a flight to catch. 
Wearing one of his shirts and his flipflops you found next to his bed, you walked until the living room and saw in his dinning table, an order bag from your favorite bakery and a little post it. 
“Morning sweetheart, 
I’m sorry If I couldn’t wake up by your side today. My flight leaves 8:30 am and I didn’t want to bother you.
I ordered your favorites things from that French bakery you like, to compensate it.
Last night was amazing and I can’t wait to see you again. 
Make yourself at home, stay as long as you want.
-Jensen.” 
You suppressed a smile feeling like a damn teenager, with all of that butterflies in your belly. This really happened. You and Jensen. 
You laughed adjusting yourself in one of the chairs, you had a delicious breakfast waiting for you after all. 
Flashback Off
That day you woke up alone in Jensen’s house, you passed still a few hours there before going back to your reality. The keys weren’t really a problem cause he had an electronic lock. You send him a photo of you eating the breakfast, which he rapidity replied with an emoji of heart eyes. 
But of course, your mind needed to start sabotaging you. You knew Jensen wasn’t the type of guy to text a lot, and you weren’t teenagers with no responsibilities, you were both busy as fuck. But you would be lying if you said if you didn’t expect a little more. Not even seeing his face for 2 weeks after you had sex, gave you so much spare time to question yourself. 
Had he really liked? He was regretting it? He realized you were actually better as friends? Why he didn’t answer your meme? How your relationship would be when he got back from L.A?
“Look.” Jared started after you explained all of it to him. “Don’t beat yourself for feeling it, your feelings are valid and I can see where they are coming from.” 
“It’s true that he could have been more present, but we both know how Jensen is  when comes to answering messages.” Jared continued laughing humorless. “But c’mom (Y/N), it’s you and Jensen were talking about! The guy has been wanting you for years.” 
“I don’t know Jar.” You sighed. “It’s like my mind knows the rationalized facts but still chose to give me the wrong answers.” 
“Are you eating right?” He asked all of that sudden surprising you. 
“Yeah…” You started and huffed when saw his accusatory face. “Ok, maybe I’m skipping breakfast.” You admitted and rolled your eyes when he didn’t back down. “No, I’m not eating right. Are you happy?” 
“No!” He cried. “You’re under stress, you’re isolating yourself, a lot of things are happening in the same time, you’re not eating right, you’re not exercising. You’re going running with me tomorrow by the way.” 
“Jared you know I hate running” You said indignant.
“I don’t care.” He cut you off. “What I’m trying to say is that you and me both… (Y/N) we have to look out for ourselves, you know that. I don’t think you’re depressed again but I think you’re in the edge of it.” Jared said making you shiver. You thought about it, damn you thought you already were. But hearing it from your best friend’s mouth, who always went to hell and back to help you, was rough. Really rough. 
“I…” You started slowly afraid of the words that was going to come back out of your mouth. “I would never forgive myself if I let me go back to that dark hole I was 10 years ago.” 
“Then don’t.” Jared struggled like it was the point of the whole conversation until now. “Can you imagine all the things you would have missed if you gave up by the first wave of depression? Young (Y/N) would have not believe she would sleep with Jensen Ackles.” He said mocking you to lighten up the mood a little bit and you allowed yourself to laugh even if was pretty hard listening to all of that. 
“Call your therapist. I’m going to ask to the producers to give you one more week off.” He continued and you open your mouth ready to argue with that nonsense. “Don’t argue with me on that one. You already have tons of advanced scenes, you need time to rest. And… stop taking life so serious honey, you have time, you’re going to figure out ok? Let yourself be surprised by it.” 
Jared said searching your eyes and saw you nodding slowly. He pulled you for a tight hug resting his head on top of yours. Your eyes were closed and for the first time in a week, you breathed out feeling calmer. Not even Billie Eilish accomplished this. 
“What do we do?” He asked in a slash joking slash serious tone, speaking like you were a little child. 
“We always keep fighting?” You said a little unsure and felt his chest vibrate when he started to laugh. 
“That’s my girl.” Jared said tightening the hug before backing away. “I love you.” 
“I love you too moose.” You said with a small smile feeling a lot better. “Thank you.” 
“I’m always here.” He said getting up. “I need to go back now.” 
You nodded and when you were in the point of putting back your AirPods, he stopped, some steps away from the bench you were. 
“Oh… and (Y/N). Jensen already arrived from L.A” He smiled. “Let life surprise you.” 
You denied with your head letting a small laugh escape from your lips, when you were reliving all of this conversation. One thing that Jared said was completely right, young (Y/N) would have been so proud and surprised by your accomplishments. You survived. This was an everyday motive to be proud already. Your thoughts were interrupted when the screen of your phone lighted up with a notification. 
“Hey sweetheart… I’m finally back in Vancouver and dying to see you. There is so much I want to tell you. And so much I wanna do to you… 
What do you say about going to that Italian restaurant at 20h? I will pick you up. 
Always yours,
Jensen.” 
Tagging: @esoltis280@smoothdogsgirl@helloangelicaaaaa@sleepylunarwolf​ @sympathyforluci​ @mirandaaustin93​ @atc74​ @spnbaby-67�� @reginaphalange2403​ @hi-my-name-is-riley​ @mychemicalimagines​ @multifandomlover121 @nyotamalfoy
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zepskies · 1 year ago
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Series Masterlist - Smoke Eater
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Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader 
Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real. 
That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.   
AN: "Smoke eater": a self-appointed slang term for a firefighter.
Get ready for an AU! Several SPN characters will make their appearances: Sam and John Winchester, Castiel as "Cas Novak," Ellen and Jo Harvelle, Jack Kline, Benny Lafitte, Gordon Walker, Meg Masters, Chuck Shurley, Nick (yes, even him), and more!
Series Tags/Warnings: (**18+ only!) There will be a lot of heart, a lot of fun, drama, heartbreak, protective Dean, and even a murder mystery. Rating for eventual smut, perilous situations, and other chapter-specific tags.
🎵 Listen While You Read:
The Smoke Eater Playlist: YouTube || Spotify
Chapters:
Part 1 - Class and Style - Podcast Version!
Part 2 - Lieutenant Winchester
Part 3 - Got a Hold on Me
Part 4 - Rocky Road
Part 5 - Twitterpated
Part 6 - Just Casual
Part 7 - Cherry Pie & Lemon Drizzle
Part 8 - Likewise, Baby
Part 9 - Do Not Disturb
Part 10 - Toil and Trouble
Part 11 - Heart of the Home
Part 12 - All in the Family
Part 13 - Boiling Point
Part 14 - Message in a Bottle
Part 15 - The Good Part
Part 16 - Break Down the Gates
Part 17 - The Real Deal
Part 18 - V for Vendetta
Part 19 - Sacrifice
Epilogue - Easy as Pie
Series Complete!
Bonus One-Shots:
Something Real** Now that you and Dean are officially engaged, you take some much needed time off together for a family vacation. But even with the wedding set for next year, the two of you are still at odds when it comes to one key part of your future together…
(Want to listen to the podcast version? Keep scrolling below!)
🎙️ Podcast Fics:
Listen to Part 1 in podfic form!
(A "podfic" is where you can listen to the story narrated.)
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(Cover image and narration by @talltalesandbedtimestories)
Or listen to the official Idling in the Impala episode of Smoke Eater Part 1 on YouTube:
Or listen on Spotify.
Listen to the Idling in the Impala podfic episode of the sequel story, Something Real below:
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Join My Patreon 🌟
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Dean Winchester Masterlist
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Series Tag List:
Comment below if you'd like to be tagged in this series!
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godmadeaterribleerror · 4 months ago
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Chapter 1 - Where Winning Looks Like Losing
Series Masterlist
Author's Note: This is story non-canon compliant, with the two main differences being; 1) Butcher doesn't have brain cancer, because I said so. 2) All of Gen V didn't take place, because I don't want to deal with the whole supe-plauge thing. Also that's too many characters to keep track of squad. Because of this, the story will start in a similar setting as s4e5, but with different events leading up to it, and will deal with similar themes and have similar events to the rest of s4, but at an inconsistent rate. If you have any questions about other, smaller changes I have made, feel free to ask! Enjoy!
Word Count: 4k
Chapter Summary/Warnings: See Author's Note for Summary. Contains usual tags. Chapter title is from Growing Up by Fall Out Boy.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, enemies to friends to lovers, canon divergence, slow burn, smut, angst, fluff.
Read on A03!
Chapter 2
Want to be tagged? Just ask!
You were not, and never had been, in the business of fighting your wars bloody. You fought them smart, and you fought them dirty. You wouldn’t call yourself callous; if anything, you could use a little more misanthropy in your life, but your moral compass was… subjective. You would steal bread to feed your family, you would cheat if you knew you wouldn’t get caught, and, as you had spent the last six months learning, you would quickly cover your hands in all the blood and grime in the world so that nobody else would have to.
Which was, unfortunately, not a figure of speech.
You let yourself lie in the mud, the cool texture soothing your always-warm skin, and fought the urge to sleep. You could hear someone shouting your name, strung together with an impressive array of obscenities and barely audible over whatever phase of the argument your companions were on, but god, you just could not bring yourself to give a fuck. Sure, the blood on your face was already dry, and the hay mixed into the mud itched and needled at your skin, but you’d live. You’d survived much worse, and at this point it was scientifically impossible for you to get sick, so everyone could just come back for you in a week or two. Maybe three. However long it took for the nightmare sheep to die and Vought’s stock prices to be lower in the mud than where you lay. Maybe a bit longer. Maybe until Homelander wasn’t a you problem anymore. Maybe they’d feed his corpse to the nightmare sheep when they came to get you.
You felt yourself smile a little at that thought. Dead Homelander, weak and pathetic; golden hair grimy; awful blue eyes milky and hollow. Dead Homelander, hands unable to hurt you, mouth unable to twist into that horrific smile. Dead Homelander, pretty face mauled and stupid outfit smelling like shit from being dragged in it to the barn. Dead Homelander, being torn to tiny pieces and eaten by sheep. Dead Homelander, the worst thing that ever happened to you, finishing his reign of terror shat out next to a creek somewhere.
Your smile covered your whole face at this point. It probably looked weird and creepy—the dire, life-or-death situation you were smack dab in the middle of not doing it any favors—but god, it was too perfect a daydream. You could live here forever, in the mud, with your fucked-up little fantasy on loop.
Tragically, you barely had twenty seconds in this ideal world when something hit you in the face.
“What the fuck?!" You sat up, ignoring the hand offering aid from Frenchie, glaring around the barn for your assailant.
“Bout time you join the land of the living, Love. We’ve got a fucking problem, and you don’t get to nap until it’s fixed.” Across the barn, Billy Butcher shot you a cocky grin that didn’t meet his eyes. To be fair, you weren’t sure it ever did.
“You didn’t have to hit me in the face, you ass.”
“That was me,” Frenchie cut in. “And you should thank me; Monsieur Butcher was going to shoot you.”
“You were going to shoot me?!”
“Would’ve felt the same either way, wouldn’t it?” Butcher shrugged.
“No! I’m not bulletproof, you dick!”
“You’d live.”
“So would MM if you shot him! I don’t see you gearing up for that!”
“Well, MM wasn’t sleeping in the middle of a crisis!”
You rolled your eyes, meeting Butcher’s glare from across the room. "Oh, please, you just wanted an excuse to try and kill me!”
“If I wanted to kill you, Sweetheart, it’d look more like this.” Butcher’s arms started to move behind him, where you knew he kept his gun, and you braced yourself, hands fisted at your side.
“Hey!” MM stepped forward, arms raised. “You, if you shoot anyone, I will throw you out to the sheep, I swear to God. And you,” he turned his gaze from Butcher, “turn it down; it’s the middle of winter in Maine, and I feel like I’m standing in the goddamn sun.”
You blinked, realizing that the room had rapidly become impossibly hot, and everyone had moved far as possible from where you stood. The new, alien feeling that sat under your skin was alight and sharp, almost buzzing through you.
“Sorry,” you mumbled, stepping back. MM lowered his arms, a look of what might have been concern flashing across his face, but turned away as the conversation returned to the murder-sheep issue.
You took a few steps back; nobody stopping you or asking for your contribution, fully allowing you to shrink into the wall. You felt your hand move up to your throat, trying to slow the tense, short breaths passing in and out of your body.
“Try thinking of something that calmed you down before.”
You jumped, not having noticed Victoria Neuman move to your side, and gave her a small frown as you responded. “What?”
“Something familiar. Anything that takes the edge off. Trust me,” she gave you a tight-lipped smile. “I’ve been dealing with this my whole life. It won’t get easier on its own. And that,“ she gestured to your hand. “Won’t help it long-term.”
You nodded slowly, forcing yourself to drag your hand from your throat. Something happy. Something happy from before. What had been happy before?
Briefly, city lights flashed in your head, a song on a stereo accompanied by your own hum ringing silently in your ears. It vanished just as fast, but something in your chest loosened, and the feeling waned. Glancing over at Neuman, you saw a small nod of approval before she left your side, allowing you a second to steel yourself before following.
You found yourself standing next to Annie, who gave you a quick and, as far as you could tell, genuine smile before returning her attention to the tense conversation between Butcher and Stan Edgar. The former's voice had grown to a shout, somewhat ranting about a goose-chase for the bioweapon supposedly on this farm, the latter just watching with a cold, indifferent gaze.
“Are you done, Mr. Butcher?” Edgar’s voice betrayed no anger or fear; the only signs of emotion on his face his tightened lips and raised brows. “Because if you are, I would finally be able to share my plan to get us out of this hellhole you dug us.”
Butcher scoffed, but before he could call Edgar either a cunt or a twat—both seemed equally plausible at the moment—the stone-faced man continued.
“While I will be the first to admit that an error was made in regards to a possible weapon against Homelander, I could not call today a complete waste. After all, you introduced me to this… charming young woman. The Anomaly,” he turned to you, and a shiver ran up your spine as he used your supe name. “Is going to help us.”
“Uh,” you paled under the pressing eyes of your team. “No. I don’t, uh, I… no.”
“Yes. You will,” Edgar said. “The V variant you carry is Homelander’s attempt to duplicate the original, the one used on Soldier Boy. Most likely a good attempt. And though the original V was unstable and less than suitable in any practical means, it was potent. I do not think I would be wrong in guessing you are just as strong as Soldier Boy, and likely immortal as well.”
“No.” Annie cut it in. “If you’re going to suggest we use her as fucking bait, the answer is no.”
“I was not going to suggest that, Ms. January, why would I waste such a good product on sheep bait? I am proposing that she simply eliminate our issue. I hear sheep catch fire quite easily.”
Everyone was looking at you now. Waiting for you to step forward and say something, anything. But you were frozen, mouth slightly agape, a million scenarios playing out in your head. You saying yes, and failing to do anything but start a forest fire, the barn burning around you as everyone remained trapped inside. You saying no, and the sheep breaking in and eating everyone alive. You saying yes, but losing control and hitting someone, watching them burn to ash as they screamed. You saying no, and everyone just rotting away in the barn; you yourself unable to do the same. The silence hung in the room, taunt with the way breathing had become labored in your chest, and you thanked a god you didn’t believe in as Annie stepped forward.
“She can’t control it,” she told Edgar. “We’ve been working on it for months, and she’s gotten better, but she can’t. It’s more complicated than it usually is, and it’s new.”
“Well, then I guess we should start to pray she gets lucky. I simply will not die in a barn in Maine, and unless anyone else has a plan, I must insist we start moving. Before the structural integrity fails us, and we all become dinner.”
The room was quiet for another moment, Annie looking as if she wanted to argue, but MM spoke first, his voice laced with reluctance.
“He’s right. We don’t have time to come up with something better.” He sighed, turning to you. “You’re the best bet we’ve got.”
“Still a shit bet,” Butcher muttered.
You agreed.
But Edgar was right.
“Everyone will need to stay inside,” you said softly. “Even if it works, this could get… messy.”
Murmurs of agreement were made, and you turned to Kimiko. “You’re the strongest,” you told her. “You can open and close the door the fastest. Crack it open, I’ll run through, and slam it as fast as you fucking can.”
She nodded, moving to the barn's entrance. As she passed you, she paused, giving your arm a small squeeze and you a small smile before she continued. You smiled back, trying to ignore the flash of her anxiety running through you at the touch. Everyone else began to move to the opposite side, hiding pointlessly behind hay and barrels. Neuman paused, though, looking at you with an unreadable expression.
“Something calm,” was all she said before turning to follow Edgar.
Something calm.
City lights. Music. Cheap burgers and cheaper beer. Carefree smiles. Music.
You stood before the doors, giving Kimiko a small thumbs up. She raised her hand, fingers falling from five to four, from four to three.
Two.
One.
You sprinted forward, waited for the sound of a slam behind you, and let go.
The world lit up.
It felt like a hurricane was spilling out of you, like a part of you was being ripped out and launched away. You could see the fire, but not quite feel it. If anything a chill had set itself through your veins, your skin becoming flushed not from heat, but exhaustion. Already darkness was creeping into your eyes, the effort to control the flames splitting the sky taking a toll. It was like a volcano trying to control its eruption, if any of its magma was under the control of the mountain.
But you had to. You could pass out after; you could sleep for a hundred years, but right now you had to control it.
The blood and muck on your skin had been long seared off, the clothes on your back turning into foul-smelling smoke. Your job was long finished now, nothing but bone and sinew remaining of the sheep, but a new problem emerged.
You couldn’t stop. You were burning and burning and burning, and the feeling in your skin wasn’t dulling, but growing. The exhaustion was gone, replaced by pure adrenaline, yanking you up and up, away from relief.
Something calm, Neuman’s voice echoed in your head, and you closed your eyes, trying to hear that long-gone music and see those phantom lights.
It wasn’t working. And you were only getting closer to an edge, a drop into something you’d been so careful to avoid. It was eating you, pushing you further and further. You'd jump into the freezing water of the river but it would just evaporate. You’d bury yourself in the mud but it would just boil, feeding into itself.
Sing, a small part of you begged the rest. Just sing. No use hiding yourself if you’re dead.
You gave in, and began to hum. An empty tune, your voice on key but strained. Slowly, you felt yourself come to, your body returning to your control. You followed the song to the end, and as it ended, just before you collapsed on the ground, relief rushed through you. The fire had lingered, a saving grace from your song. You hadn’t felt any effects, with no hallucinations plaguing your vision before it went dark.
————
The first thing you realized when you woke up was that someone had moved you from the dirt to rest against a tree. The second was that you were no longer naked. Someone had apparently managed to find you clothes, and though they were itchy and a few sizes too big, you were still grateful. The third was that you smelled like shit. You had thought you were covered in blood before, but that now seemed as if it had been bubbles and floral perfume. One might have thought thoroughly barbecued sheep would’ve smelled at least tolerable. They would’ve been wrong. Because you were covered in what of it hadn’t dissipated into smoke, and you smelled like a dumpster full of rubber and fish.
The only person who would come near you was Frenchie, who had forsaken his sense of smell years ago, and had evidently dressed you and pulled you to where you currently sat. Everyone else stood closer to the fence, waiting for their ride back to New York to pull up on the dirt road. You sat alone, eyes still drooping, startled out of your own head as Edgar’s voice cut through the air.
“I must say, I am glad to see my faith in you was not misplaced.”
"Yeah, well,” you shrugged, looking up at where he stood, only a few feet away. “I wouldn’t ask for an encore.”
“I am afraid I may have to. In our prior introduction, it seems you deeply undersold your capabilities.”
“Forgive me, I didn’t have time for self-evaluation when I was being kept in a fucking dungeon.”
Edgar sighed. “I must apologize for that. Though I was not made aware of Homelander’s little escapade, I recognize that you might feel as though I hold some blame.”
“Not an apology,” you muttered. “And I find that hard to believe.”
“Unfortunate, but I cannot force you to accept the truth.” He looked you up and down once before continuing. “And regardless, it is not what I am here to say.”
“I was wrong only once today, and it was when I said you were just as strong as Soldier Boy. You are not. You are much, much stronger. Not physically, of course, but overall. Overall, your power surpasses Soldier Boy’s, surpasses Homelander’s. I know you wish him dead, I would imagine you prefer it to be painful, and very few deaths inflict the suffering felt when one is burned alive. I suggest you learn how to control your gift, and learn fast. You were looking for a weapon, and I am telling you that you are it. Do not waste yourself.”
And he walked away, leaving your mouth open and your eyes wide. You stood to follow him, painfully pulling yourself to your feet, but made only a few steps before you felt a rock hit your back, and you whipped around to find Frenchie behind you, holding a hose.
“Starlight suggests you take a shower before our drive back,” he said, gesturing to the hose.
You blinked, looking back at Edgar, only to watch him be loaded into an armed van. Your brow wrinkled, a part of you wanting to chase the car down and demand Edgar elaborate, but you just turned back to Frenchie with a sigh.
“Sure, just count down before you–“
You cut yourself off as the freezing water hit you in the face.
Thankfully, Frenchie had thought to bring a towel—a gross, possibly moldy towel—but a towel nonetheless, and he handed it to you the moment the hose-down was finished. As his arm stretched out, you noticed a deep gash poking out from his sleeve.
“I can fix that,” you gestured to him. “I mean, I’ll have to touch you, but I won’t tell anyone what I feel, and you won’t have to let MM give you stitches.”
Frenchies frowned, looking at his arm as if only he now noticing his injury. “Are you sure? You must be tired, and–“
“I’ll be fine. Won’t hurt me for more than a few seconds.”
He hesitated, but gave you a nod, rolling up his sleeve before offering his injury to you. You took a deep breath and placed your hand over the wound. It hit you fast, it always did, the onslaught of emotions. You were suddenly twice as tired, a powerful and painful guilt sitting on your shoulders and a self-loathing that was familiar, but not yours, carved itself into your chest. After a second to adjust, you started to work. Your own arm, mirror to Frenchies, began to sting as the skin turned raw and red. You bit your tongue, ignoring it and focusing on keeping yourself going until the cut was gone, the skin was healthy, and there were no signs of any issues in the first place.
“Huh,” Frenchie stated at his unmarked arm, glancing at your own, which was already fully healed itself. “Merci.”
“No problem,” you offered him a grin. “Just don’t tell Butcher you accepted my evil supe healing.”
“You do not,” he frowned slightly. “You do not feel everything, yes? Just, simple, children’s emotions?”
It was your turn to frown. “Children’s emotions?”
“Oui. Joy, fear, sadness. No more.”
Oh. You hesitated to answer, debating if it was worth the lie. It would make him feel better, you reasoned with yourself.
But he wouldn’t trust you, a little voice whispered. And he’ll hate you.
You settled on the truth. You didn’t think you could stand another person hating you.
“No, I feel… everything,” you admitted. “But I wasn’t lying before. I won’t tell anyone.” You paused, watching his face carefully as you continued. “I won’t tell Kimiko.”
A look of shock passed over his face, but Frenchie nodded. “Good. Good. Tres bien,” he gave you a grateful look. “Merci.”
“Anytime,” you gave him a close-lipped smile, and the two of you returned to your group just as your ride pulled up. As you loaded into the car and began the long, tense drive, Edgar’s words replayed on loop in your head.
Your power surpasses Soldier Boy’s, surpasses Homelander’s. Learn how to control your gift, and learn fast. Do not waste yourself.
Do not waste yourself.
You thought back to the last time you saw Homelander. Though it had been from a distance, and he had not even known you were there, your body had frozen. Fear, white-hot and all consuming, had coursed through you. You had almost passed out from it. If you had been face-to-face with him, it might have killed you all on its own.
Do not waste yourself.
You couldn’t fight Homelander. You just couldn’t. You could be capable of overpowering him tenfold, and you still wouldn’t be able to fight him. You knew, in your heart, that his eyes would meet yours and you would be sent right back into that tiny white room, feel his hands holding you down, feel that hollow, empty hopelessness leak from you into the air.
But he needs to die, a small voice whispered in your head. And you’re the Anomaly. You could kill him. You’re the only one who could stop him forever, make sure he never hurts anyone, ever again.
No. No, you couldn’t be the only one. Yes, the biochem weapon had been a bust, and no one else could possibly rival Homelander and come out of it alive. But there had to be other options.
Your power surpasses Soldier Boy’s.
Do not waste yourself.
An idea started to form in your head. A terrible idea. A reckless and dangerous idea. But an idea all the same. And as it became fully formed, you managed to convince yourself more and more that it might somehow work.
Now all you had to do was convince everyone else.
——-
“No. No fucking way.”
The air in the meeting room was tense, mouths hanging open in shock. MM was glaring at you with a disdain you had previously only seen directed at Butcher, Butcher watched at you with a reverence you hope to never see on his face again, Grace Mallory looked all at once disgusted, intrigued, and impressed, and President-Elect Singer frowned as he listened, but gave you a nod to continue regardless.
“I know it’s crazy, but the problem last time was that you couldn’t control him, right? And I could. You can have us isolated, making sure we're out of the public eye and away from any possible collateral until you need us. I’d keep an eye on him, keep him in line, and he wouldn’t be able to hurt me.”
“I, for one, think this is an amazing idea. Best one I ever heard,” Butcher grinned at you. “Worst case scenario, it goes sideways, he kills her, we knock him out, and everyone still wins.”
“What part of ‘he wouldn’t be able to hurt me’ don’t you understand?” You snapped back.
“What if he blasts you with his fucking reactor?” MM pushed. “Makes you just another human? What’s your plan then?”
“That wouldn’t work on me,” you responded dryly.
Butcher snorted, but Mallory raised an eyebrow.
“Really? What makes you so sure?”
“One of the tests that was run on me was putting me in a room and blasting it with nuclear energy. They dropped Hiroshima on me, and it did jack shit. Soldier Boy throwing a temper tantrum won’t be any different.”
“And how do you think you could control him?” Singer asked.
“I can burn up to 5500 degrees Celsius. That’s hotter than a bomb. Won’t kill him, will knock him the fuck out. And it’ll hurt.”
“I just can’t believe I didn’t think of this sooner,” Butcher mused. “It’s fuckin' perfect.”
You glowered at him. “Stop helping me.”
MM looked at Mallory. “The fact that America’s number one unstable asshole,” he gestured to Butcher. “Is on board should be enough to tell you how stupid this is.”
“Number two unstable asshole,” you said under your breath.
“Thanks, Love,” Butcher winked at you.
“Yeah well, don’t be so pleased. You’re only just losing to Homelander.”
Butcher shrugged, and you returned your attention to Singer. “Sir, please trust me. I, more than almost anyone, know how dangerous this could be. But Homelander is more dangerous. We needed a weapon,” you echoed Edgar’s words. “This is it.”
Singer nodded slowly, and MM scoffed.
“You can’t be seriously considering this. He’s a fucking unstable asshole murderer and a goddamn liability. What if we wake him up, she can’t control him, and he gets free?”
“We said whatever it takes,” you snapped. “I wouldn’t be pitching this if I thought it wouldn’t work. I can control him, I promise.”
“You’d bet your life on it?” Mallory asked.
“My life?” You snorted. “In a heartbeat.”
Mallory sighed. “Then fine,” she shot a look to Singer. “I’ll sign off if you do.”
“Sir,” MM said, sounding almost desperate. “I am begging you, do not do this.”
Singer just shook his head slightly. “Desperate times, they make you do desperate things. If I saw another way, I’d take it, but for now we’ll have to make do. I approve the request.”
“Thank you, sir.” You gave Singer a grateful nod, ignoring the searing feeling of MM’s anger.
“Don’t thank me, girl. If this goes south, it’s your head. Grace, set up a safe house for them ASAP, if I’m signing off on this I want it moving fast.”
Mallory nodded. “It’ll take a few days. We’ll have to transport him there before we wake him up.”
“Do whatever you have to,” Singer said as he stood to leave. “If this is our only shot, we can’t afford to miss.”
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jessjad · 1 year ago
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Unexpected
Series Masterlist
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Summary: After a Halloweenparty Y/N actually didn't want to got to, her life seems to be turned around. The reason is a very stubborn Supe that seems to have her in his visier. Is it just a coincidance or more?
Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x Reader
Warnings: 18+ only!! Annoyance, forced situations, hurt/comfort, misogyny, kidnapping, violence, smut, maybe enemies to lovers? All chapters will have their own warning.
A/N: So, here it is. I had a lot of ideas for these two and it seems like we're getting more out of it than just a miniseries. I'll start posting as soon as I can, but schedule wise I can't promise anything right now. Which means that anyone who wants to be tagged has time to let me know.
I'll ad the Oneshot who inspired me as a prequel, but you can still read it as a standalone.
My Masterlist
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Prequel
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15 - Epiloge
Series complete!
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layce2015 · 1 year ago
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Supernatural (Dean Winchester x Female!Reader) Masterlist Pt 2
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Masterlist Pt 1
Apparently in the original Masterlist I hit my limit of links it would let me. So here is the rest of the chapters. Above is the link to the first Masterlist!
Season 4 (cont.)
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Season 5
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
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thebiggerbear · 6 months ago
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Closer Masterlist
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Summary: Now that Russell knows the truth about you, there isn't anything he won't do to try to get you out. Even if it means he might have to move up the timeline of his exit strategy earlier than planned.
Pairing: Russell Shaw x Female!Reader; Russell Shaw x Female!FBI Special Agent!Reader
A/N: Continuation of storyline in So Close and Close Enough, a sort of sequel.
Thank you to my beta @rieleatiel for the beautiful banner above! You rock, girl!
Please let me know if you would like to be tagged in this series.
A little disclaimer: I have never worked in law enforcement so I tried to piece together things I’ve seen and heard in true crime documentaries and podcasts alongside with movies/tv and books. I apologize for any inconsistencies, incorrect information, exaggerations, or complete fallacies. Basically, I made shit up.
Warnings: mentions of sanctioned assassination; violence; gun violence; language; (I will add more as I go)
Part 1: So Close and Yet So Far
Part 2: Kind Eyes -- Helpful Eyes...I Like That
Part 3: A Little Somethin' Somethin'
Part 4: Very On Brand
Part 5: Exit Strategy
Series Playlist
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Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187; @impala67rollingthroughtown; @hobby27
Series Taglist: @deangirl96; @angelbabyyy99; @ej13928; @corruptedcruiser; @star-yawnznn; @stoneyggirl2; @jvanilly
Jensen Taglist: @samanddeaninatrenchcoat; @deansbbyx; @deans-spinster-witch; @lyarr24; @bts24; @roseblue373; @rebel-paladin; @nancymcl
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Please let me know if you would like to be tagged for this mini series.
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dividers by @firefly-graphics
banner by @cafekitsune
Main Masterlist
Main Tag List Submission Form
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pamwritessometimes · 2 months ago
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Pam’s masterlist
Fandoms I currently write for:
🤍 Supernatural
🤍 The Boys
🤍 Tracker
🤍 Walker
🤍 Big Sky
Soldier Boy (Ben)
1. British Invasion (Soldier Boy x British!fem!reader)
Summary: Soldier Boy is forced to attend a gallery opening for an emerging British artist, expecting nothing more than a typical evening of pretentious small talk and overpriced art. But when he gets to know the artist herself, he quickly realizes they might share more than one thing in common.
Warnings: unprotected SMUT (be smarter), pet names, some 60s slang, breeding kink if you squint, terrible writing, AmE and BritE use is varied based on the characters
2. pov: you make an Instagram profile for Ben (Social Media AU)
3. Part two of making Ben an Instagram account (Social Media AU)
Beau Arlen
1. Fridays are for beer and heartbreak (Beau Arlen x Reader)
Summary: Your favorite patron’s there to mend your broken heart.
Warnings: none? oh, maybe that English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes.
Sam Winchester
1. What he doesn’t know (Sam Winchester x Reader)
Summary: You’re hiding two dangerous secrets from Sam. Little did you know, he’s just uncovered one, but it’s not the one you think.
Dean Winchester
1. Roots in my dreamland (Dean Winchester x Forest Spirit!Reader)
Summary: Dean encounters a mysterious forest spirit who’s an enigma.
Loosely based on ivy by Taylor Swift.
Warnings: unprotected SMUT (bring protection with yourself, yes, even to a forest), P in V, being naked in the snow, fingering, crack ending, grammar mistakes galore.
Russell Shaw
1. Tuesday’s Gone (series) (Russell Shaw x reader)
Summary: When the police does little to no help to find your missing daughter, you are forced to contact Colter Shaw. What you don’t expect is how his investigation will reveal secrets about both your past and your daughter’s, in ways you never imagined.
💌Requests are open💌
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