#ive gotten better at knowing my limits and it sucks bc omg turns out i sure do have them!
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#ive done gone and been silly goofy with the autism burn out again lads#need to reduce my hours at work NEED TO GET A FUCKING DIAGNOSIS need to learn to live with this fucking capitalist hellscape#i really really did genuinely want to make it in tomorrow (today (in 7 hours))#but i have so much Fucking Anxiety is cant Fucking Sleep which is gonna make me Not Able To Go In#ahshshjajajaaAAAAAAAA#i want to HOWL in the WOODS like a WOLF#anyway i dont have a solution for this#reducing my hours might help#but only temporarily while i dont have to pay rent#and it is looking like i am never going to be able to work more than part time without Constantly having breakdowns and panic attacks#so uhhhh lol how the fuck am i meant to live#i worked so fUcking hard for this fucking independence and to Not have to go back to my parents#i was couch surfing for FOUR MONTHS and nearly lost my mind and i still didnt go back there#but i have no idea what im gonna do when fox wants to move in with matt#and i wanted to go back to uni part time to do a masters in a subject id Actually fucking enjoy but that was only a feasible plan if#if i could work part time alongside it and I Dont Think I Can Do That#ive gotten better at knowing my limits and it sucks bc omg turns out i sure do have them!#turns out autism is actually a disability and not just a fun personality trait boooo#anyway uhhh okay google play heaven knows im miserable now by the smiths. whatever.#tag ramblings
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