#ive been trying so hard to do everything right but unfortunately shes just built different 😞

[theygender]

Taking my cat back to the vet for the third time after getting her spayed bc her swag is too different and she keeps finding new ways to evade their attempts at keeping her incision closed and healing

[babybatscreationsv2]

Spider-Verse: Predators ch24

Marvel | Starker

Peter Parker is barely keeping it together. Dealing with Gwen Stacy's death, Harry Osborn going MIA, and MJ refusing to take his calls, has the guy feeling seriously run down. Now to top it off, his uncle Ben is facing serious prison time. Fortunately or unfortunately, New York's own Kingpin of Crime, Tony Stark, has offered him a deal to save his uncle. On a positive note, this Kingpin guy is kind of hot. Is it wrong to sleep with a murderous criminal?

Rating: Explicit

Read it on Ao3

The lab was in shambles. Lights hung from the ceiling, bits of metal and glass littered the floor. It was impossible to safely navigate the place without his suit. Even Tony wore his fancy new nanobot tech as he investigated the damage. On a normal day, Peter would be babbling and investigating the swarm of intelligent minibots that covered the man's body, but now he sat, watching the crack in the glass start to grow.

“How long... do you think?” Peter asked.

Tony swiped a hand through his hair. “A few hours as best. Once the glass breaks-”

“I know. We can't keep him in stasis without the chamber. You really don't have another one?”

“I'm sorry, Pete. That alien freak broke everything. There were three others, but they're all broken.There's one we might be able to repair, but I don't think it will be in time.” Broken glass crunched over his feet as he left the tech he was fiddling with to come stand behind Peter. His large metal hands covered his shoulders. “What's your plan when it does break?”

“I don't know,” Peter sighed. “I don't know, Tony...”

Tony kissed the top of his head. “I'm here with you, baby.”

Yes, Peter felt warmer, safer to hear it. He even let his eyes close for a moment and pretend none of this had happened. The problem was that Tony couldn't protect him from this. When the stasis chamber that was containing the half formed Lizard broke, Harry's transformation would begin again. He would be left mindless and destructive. And there was no cure. Tony had been trying for months to find one and never did. They could sedate him, keep him tranquilized, but would it work? There were no guarantees.

“Let's fix it. The other chamber.”

“Okay,” Tony agreed. Peter was admittedly surprised. He expected the man to remind him how much work it would take and how much time and how little time they had. He had expected Tony to insist on putting a bullet in Harry's face the minute they realized that the glass was breaking. Peter had changed something in him after all. He cared a little bit more. Or maybe he just cared about Peter.

They got to work. Half of their time was spent by Tony explaining to him what every little part was for. Peter knew machines well enough, but he wasn't the genius who built his own stasis chamber and there was a lot to learn. More time was spent teaching Peter what to do before they could do anything, than Peter would have liked. After a few hours, he understood well enough what everything was and they settled into a rhythm in their repairs. Most of Peter's work was done at the 3D-printer while Tony fiddled with the machine, but it was a system that worked well enough.

Peter was repairing a broken wire when Tony put down the tools in his hands. His head tilted up toward the ceiling and he sighed.

“What is it?”

“We should just let him out,” he said, looking away at the wall.

“What?” Peter stared. He couldn't be serious. Let the Lizard out?

Tony looked at him. “Murdock wants his blood. You heard him, right? He wanted his alien pal to get the blood from the cooler, but they didn't get it. There's not a single bag or vial missing. If we turn your lizard friend loose then Matt will go after him.”

“We can't do that! He could kill someone.”

“And Matt could kill you! Or your aunt for that matter. I don't know if you've noticed this, but Matthew is a literal fucking ninja. If he wants to slip into Aunty May's house while you're not around, I can't promise you that my people will notice.”

Peter shook his head. He crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at the wall. “Then I'll go home. Until we get him. I should have been home.”

Tony turned his head away and Peter knew that he'd hurt him. It was the obvious thing to do, but Tony could be surprisingly fragile. He needed Peter close. If he stopped coming to the tower it could damage their relationship. He couldn't leave May to die either way. He'd do a lot of things for Tony, but not that. Maybe he'd been naive to think that she was safe all this time.

His spider sense flared up at the back of his neck. There was someone else in the lab. Peter turned, watching, listening. He raised his arm, ready to fire and Tony followed suit. Then a woman entered the room.

Peter recognized her blonde hair and glasses. Betrayal cut at him. He had sort of thought they were allies. Elsa held her hands up in innocence.

“I know you're mad. I get it, but I think we can help you.” Her eyes wandered to Harry, half covered in scales, in his cracked containment chamber.

“Is my security team sleeping? How did you get in here?” Tony said.

“We're good at getting into places we're not supposed to be.”

“Oh yeah? Who's we?” Tony asked. Before Peter could explain, there was Venom rising in a goopy, snake-like form from Elsa's shoulder. “Alright, explain yourself.”

“Murdock betrayed us, too. He helped us once, because he hoped that we would owe him. Except that it didn't go like he planned.”

“You're not making a great case for yourself,” Peter said.

“Yeah, maybe get to the part where we care,” Tony added.

Elsa sighed. “Men,” she huffed. “My other isn't stable. Never was. I created it, but things happened, we bonded too soon. I shouldn't have taken it out of containment until it was ready. Long story short, I needed something to stabilize it. After months of research, my work suggested that something like Spiderman wasn't so different from my symbiote. In theory anyway. I don't know how he found out, but Murdock came. He said that he could get me a sample of Spiderman's blood. If I were willing to kill Spiderman for him.”

Peter heard the whir of Tony's repulsor charging. “Please wait,” Elsa sighed. “You'll only piss them off and we didn't come here to kill you.”

Tony let the charge die, but he kept his arm raised.

“Anyway,” she began again. “He got me the blood and it helped, for a while. Spiderman's blood stabilized Venom and gave them new abilities as well. We were stronger than ever. And then the bond started to break. We got sick.I realized that something in your blood was breaking down our cells. You might have spider-like abilities, but you're not actually a man bonded to a spider. You're still made of human parts. We aren't.We're an amalgamation of two different creatures. Like the Lizard. We need to know what keeps the Lizard's form stable once it bonds to a human body.”

Tony whistled. “That was a lot. You think that up on the cab ride over?”

“It's true!” Elsa shouted. Venom growled.

“Eat him,”it hissed.

“Hush, love,” she said. “Please, Mr. Stark.”

“What is it you want?” Peter asked. He finally lowered his arm and took a step forward hoping to resolve the tension before another fight broke out. All it would take was another hard hit and the glass protecting Harry would shatter. They'd have a whole host of other problems.

Elsa wrapped her arms around herself. Venom nuzzled into her hair. “If we allow Venom to bond with this lizard boy, I'm almost certain that Venom will be able to separate the lizard parts from the human parts and bond with them. We've been practicing. It's possible that it won't work, but if Venom can bond with the Lizard and draw it out from the boy and carry it over in to me it will save the boy from the Lizard and possibly give us a way to stabilize our bond.”

“If that's even possible, it makes sense... Sorta.” Peter shrugged.

Tony sighed. “It's your boyfriend.Your call.”

Peter shot a glare over his shoulder. Then he crossed the dirty floor and he looked at Harry sleeping in his goop. Maybe they could fix the other chamber, maybe they could sedate him if the glass broke too soon, maybe they could eventually engineer a cure, but how long would Harry stay this way? He could wake up an old man. His heart ached. He'd done so much to hurt him already. Maybe he could save him. At least from this. From the first big mistake Spiderman ever made. And maybe he could finally be free of the Lizard himself.

“We'll try it. What are the odds this hurts Harry if it doesn't work?”

Elsa shrugged. “I'm sorry, but no one has ever done anything like this before. He could reject Venom immediately. Venom could make a mistake and separate the wrong cells.The Lizard could do any number of unpredictable things. There's no way of knowing.”

She put a hand on his shoulder. “For what it's worth, I know that my other will do everything possible. We have a stake in this, too.”

If she were telling the truth, she would die if this didn't work. Not just Harry. This could easily go from a cure to a disaster. If they didn't anything try at all, Elsa would still die. Despite having destroyed Tony's lab, she seemed like a decent person who just wanted to live with the slime monster she loved.

“Please,Spiderman,” Venom rumbled.

Peter nodded. “Okay. Let's give it a shot.”

Elsa helped Peter clean off a cot for Harry while Tony went to his computer. It started draining the goop from the chamber. Then they could remove the IV and all the sensors and pull him out. They might not have long before the sedation wore off once the IV was out.

“Do you think we should keep him sedated when we pull him out?” Pete wondered. “He could take someone's head off.”

“It could put Venom out, too,” Elsa frowned. “We'll just have to be careful.”

“I have something that might help, but it won't work forever,” Tony said. He went to the storage along the wall. Half of the cupboards were smashed, but one that was intact unlocked at Tony's touched. “I didn't make them big enough to fit a lizard man, but they'll hold him until he'd fully transformed.” He held up a pair of dense metal handcuffs.

“If all goes to plan, he never will,”Elsa said.

Peter sighed. “Nothing in my life goes to plan.” Still, he pulled open the door and caught Harry as he slipped out. Tony grabbed his legs and together they moved hin onto a cot. Harry groaned in his sleep.

“Clock's ticking,” Tony cautioned.

Elsa stepped up to the bedside. Venom stretched, becoming a long, writhing, stream of goo that moved from Elsa into Harry. The goop seemed to absorb through his skin, disappearing without a trace. Elsa gave a huff of breath. Nothing seemed to change with Harry, but Elsa was visibly anxious. Her shoulders twitched and her eyes were locked on to the spot in Harry's chest when Venom had disappeared to.

“How long do you think?” Peter asked.

She didn't move, didn't look away. “We practiced on rats mostly. It took a few hours. Could be days given the size and complexity of a human/lizard hybrid. And they'll be taking the most possible care.”

Tony eyed the room around them. Peter remembered just how badly it was all falling apart. It was a miracle the building overhead didn't sink down into it. “Elsa, do you have somewhere we can keep them until it's done?”

“I can monitor things from my apartment.” She reached out, her hand going to Harry's arm only to draw back. “I'll call you if anything happens.”

“Good or bad,” Peter agreed.

Cradling Harry's scaly form in webbing, Peter dragged him up the broken elevator shaft. Tony carried Elsa. She seemed distraught and Peter felt for her. He and Tony were codependent enough. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to be separated from a partner who you otherwise shared a body with. It was obvious just how romantically attached they were and how odd was that in the first place? To be in love with the sentient goo you made in a lab.

Elsa lived in one of the cheapest apartments on this side of the city, or any side for that matter. Peter remembered how bad this particular building was from his time looking at apartments with MJ. The place smelled as bad as he remembered. The clutter of old food containers in Elsa's apartment certainly fit in with the aesthetic of the place and there was a faint smell of something dead coming from the overflowing trash can.

Peter tucked Harry into Elsa's bed. He grumbled as he Peter set him down. “Call me if he changes at all. If he moves, if he says something, anything.”

“You got it.” Elsa stood, leaning against the door frame. Her face was twisted with worry. He wanted to assure her that this would work, that everything was going to be fine, but he just didn't know. This was all her research, all her experiment, and yes if it went sideways then it would all be on her. Still, it was her life that was at stake, hers and Harry's. She caught his eye and they shared a look that said it all. She nodded, then he brushed gently passed her.

Tony was toeing at a stack of science magazines that could have been dated years back.

“Ready to head out?”

Peter nodded. He looked over his shoulder and sighed. “I guess so.”

“Sure you don't want to hold your boyfriend's hand until he wakes up?”

Peter shot him a glare. “What's your problem?”

Tony shrugged. “Nothing.”

“Whatever. Let's not do this here.” Peter flipped out of the window and dropped down toward the street. He swung up on a web over the next building then down again. He swung his way up a few blocks, letting the rush of air calm his mind. He had enough on his mind with Harry's life being in danger. He didn't need Tony's jealousy weighing on him. Why had he even bothered to help him if he was going to be a dick about it? Swinging past a window covered in signs for the upcoming mayoral election, it occurred to him that it might not have been about him at all.

Tony was in his office when Peter swung back in through the window. He'd taken off his suit and was fiddling with the sleeve of his under armor. He kept his back turned as Peter came in, but they were going to have it out whether he wanted to or not.

Peter tapped his foot on the floor, debating where to start. “Were you ever actually looking for a cure?”

Tony turned. His expression was insulted. “Was I- of course of I was. Would I have given it to the boy if I found it, though? That's the question you should be asking.”

Peter's jaw clenched and he shook his head. “Why the hell did I ever trust you with this?”

“Because you had no one else,” Tony pointed out. “And because you can trust me.”

“Can I? You were going to use him as leverage against Norman. Why? So you could campaign against him?”

Tony snorted. “I don't need to be mayor, Peter. That's just silly.”

No, Tony was Kingpin and unfortunately that made him more powerful than the mayor. “You were going to get him elected.”

Tony nodded and gestured for him to continue. “And then? What happens next in my genius plan?” He turned away to pour himself a drink.

“And then you control the legal side of the city as much as the underground. Because you have his son. Because if you had a cure you could hold it over him. You wanted to let Harry out so that Norman would owe you everything when you cured him.”

“Well not exactly.” Tony sipped his drink. He leaned back against the table. “I didn't lie to you, Peter. I will never lie to you.” Peter didn't fall for his melting chocolate eyes. “There is no cure. Not yet. By the time we have one, the Lizard will be no more, one way or the other. I was going to let the boy out, let him do some big scary property damage, eat someone's cat, whatever, and then let Osborn know that I know that the Lizard is his son.”

“And he wouldn't want the city to know that. He'd do anything.”

Tony smiled. “Bingo. Now you're thinking like the Kingpin.”

Peter shook his head. “Fuck you,Tony.”

The man rolled his eyes. “I was never going to let anything happen to your boyfriend.”

“He's not my boyfriend! You are!”Peter tugged off his mask and paced the floor with it in his hands.“I wish you would just act like it instead of confusing me with all your jealously immediately after pretending that you're capable of putting all of that aside and helping me when I need you to and I don't get you, Tony-” He looked up, realizing then that Tony had set his drink down to stalk towards him somewhere during his babbling.

There was a dark possessive quality to his eyes. Peter let him crowd him in until he was backed into the wall. “Tell me again,” he rumbled. “Who am I?”

There was so much heat rolling between them it was smothering. Despite that he was barely two inches shorter than Tony, he was leaning over him enough to make him feel small, arms caging him in.

“My boyfriend,” Peter answered.

Tony nodded, a grin threatening to curl his lips. “And what are you?”

“Yours?” Peter said, hoping to appease whatever dark desire was growing in his eyes.

Tony's hand twitched against the wall and he could feel it against his throat without it ever touching him. “My everything.”

“Yours,” he said again, in a daze.There was a tension building between them. When Tony pressed their bodies together, Peter sighed with relief as the tension resolved.This was everything he needed. He let his hands wrap around the back of Tony's neck. He soaked up the press of Tony's hands on his waist. The man buried his face in his neck. There was no kissing or teasing, just warmth and comfort as they resolved their jealousy and hurt without another word. They stayed that way until the press of the wall into his back became uncomfortable and Peter gently pushed Tony back a step.

Tony sighed. “I've been selfish, asking you to come back here all this time while Murdock is out there. He'll recover from his injuries soon. You should be with your aunt.”

Peter pressed his forehead against Tony's. “It's going to kill me to be without you.”

"We can survive anything."

"I'll only be a call away."

Tony grinned. "Don't I know it."

[yourdeepestfathoms]

for anyone curious, my newest book is about the Salem Witch Trials! it’s at the point of view of Mary Warren and how she went through trials, ultimately ending in her downward spiral into madness as the trials deteriorate her mental health. it’s called Servant of Evil.

here’s the first segment of the first chapter!

— — —

She was gathering crops the first day she caught wind of the hysteria.

It was late January and sunny, the last warm day in what would soon feel like forever. The sickle in her hand was wickedly sharp and gleaming in pale yellow light, and the stalks of the corn she was cutting away were rough and sharp beneath calloused fingers. Already, the skin on her hands was shredded, oozing ruby droplets of blood and staining bright green stems. Her legs ached from crouching in the dirt, muscles locked up and tense. Somewhere beyond the pillars of corn stretched out before her, she could hear her master’s children talking in high-pitched voices, dogs barking, and horses neighing. Even closer than that, however, she could hear heavy footsteps tramping through the field, and she knew the owner of this land would not enjoy such galumphing through his crops. But she also knew that the one who appeared through the stalks wouldn’t care much for the fiery point of John Proctor’s scorn.

“Something weirdish is going on in Salem.”

Without looking up, Mary Warren answered the unexpected visitor, “Something is always going on in Salem.”

That much was true, at least right now. Salem was a town of rich trade and sea salt, characterized by a sparkling harbor that was bested only by Boston’s and a habit of fighting with itself. For years, Salem had been split between two forces: the nobles up in Salem Town and the farmers down in Salem Village. The two territories were never not fighting with each other; they were always mad about something the other did, and it was easy to lose track of who hated who and for what reason. Salem Village didn’t like the control Salem Town held over it, while Salem Town was annoyed by Salem Village thinking it was its own settlement, but they all detested the British church, which was mutual. Salem Town often pulled men from Salem Village to be a part of the national guard, which made Salem Village nervous because then they would have nobody to protect them, and Indian attacks were a regular fear throughout the civilization. Aside from its harbor, the other thing Salem had to owe to its popularity was its unfortunate position in front of frequent ambushes. And if it didn’t suffer ambushes first-hand, then it suffered ambushes through the survivors of such raids, many of which populated the city and would soon help with the grisly events that turned the community over on its head.

But the only other thing Salem Village and Salem Town could agree on was that the Indians were an issue. Unfortunately, that was where agreements ended and arguments began- Salem Town wanted more men to train, promising protection; Salem Village refusing, saying they knew how Salem Town lied, and if they didn’t, then they only saved them because of their bountiful trade and not because they were their people. It wouldn’t be long until the yelling broke out, testaments from the Bible were quoted, and grown men argued like two children fighting over who was their parents’ favorite kid.

However, Salem as a whole had fallen silent recently. Things were peaceful. It was as though a grace period were opening up before them all--or, perhaps, it was actually ending.

Except for right now, in the Proctor corn field, of course. Because her visitor would only bring silence if she were dead, and she had proved to be too slippery for death’s fingers three times over after surviving several Indian attacks throughout her young life.

“This is different.”

Wiping a sagging green sleeve over her damp brow, Mary looked up and squinted through sweat and sun to look at none other than the Putnam’s maid, Mercy Lewis.

Mercy was a fine example of everything the Puritans didn’t want. Despite her name’s sake, she was stubborn, brash, and spitfire, though she was smart enough to never act in such a way in front of the church. And she was, indeed, smart. She was more clever than a fox, easily outwitting several situations despite the minimal education women had in their lifetime. The only thing she was merciful to was her younger cousin, Ann Putnam Jr. Her parents were better off naming her Big, Loud, and Vulgar.

Mercy was nineteen-years-old, two years older than Mary, and built like a small bear. She was short, compact, and sinewy, her muscles and joints well-honed from rough maid work. Her temper was black and her teeth were sharp. Her curly dark brown hair was tucked up in her blindingly white bonnet, and she was dressed in a nondescript dress of purple. Storm cloud grey eyes bore down on Mary with bright amusement.

The two of them met three years ago in Elizabeth Proctor’s tavern. Mary had been struggling to wipe away a sticky stain on one of the tables; Mercy was looking for fresh meat. They both were in the right place at the right time.

Mary hadn’t heard her come in. It was as though the shadows of the tavern itself had unfolded the sixteen-year-old before her because she was suddenly there, towering over the front of the table, and Mary ended up spilling the bowl of soapy water she was using all over herself upon noticing her.

“My, are you jumpy,” the strange girl had observed, peering over the edge of the table. She didn’t offer Mary her help or even an apology. Mary didn’t ask for one. “Were your parents murdered by savages, too?”

“What?”

“Ooo, no, then. Got it.”

Mary blinked up at her for a moment, then carefully got up out of the sudsy puddle and retrieved a dry rag to clean up the newest mess. The entire time, the strange girl watched her as she dripped droplets and beads of white soap from the bottom of her old lavender dress.

“Can I help you?” Mary asked as she got back down on her hands and knees to clean the floor.

“Oh, no,” the strange girl answered. “I just came to say hello. Introduce myself. You work for the Proctor’s, yeah?”

“Yes,” Mary nodded.

“Interesting, interesting. I work for the Putnam’s. Thomas is my cousin, actually.”

Mary nodded again. She looked back down at the puddle, trying to focus on that. The girl didn’t move.

“Mercy.”

Mary looked back up again. She blinked. The strange girl blinked back. Was this a game?

“Pity.”

The girl stared at her for a moment, then burst into loud laughter that seemed to shake the walls. Mary was startled; she had never heard anyone laugh so hard in her entire life. Especially in a town as strict as Sakem.

“No, that’s my name,” the girl said after calming down. “My name is Mercy. Mercy Lewis.”

“Oh,” Mary’s ears heated up. “Right. Your parents were feeling pretty creative, weren’t they?”

Another bout of laughter. “Yes. Yes, they were.” She squinted at her. “And you are?”

“Mary. Mary Warren.”

“Well, Mary ‘Pity’ Warren, I think we are going to be very good friends.”

And she was right.

Mercy, as menacing as she could be, made life in Salem a lot more bearable, especially when Proctor’s whip frequently began lapping at Mary’s bare back. Together, they formed a cohort of sorts, sneaking away into the woods with other village girls, hiding away from the Lord’s watchful eyes to discuss the most sinful of things.

And today, Mercy wanted to carry on with their long-running traditions.

“Different in what way?” Mary asked.

Mercy rolled her eyes. She kicked a cloud of dust at Mary, and Mary sputtered, nearly falling backwards into the corn.

“Different-different,” Mercy answered. “Something is wrong with Abigail. Betty, too, I hear. We’re gonna go up to the Reverend’s house and see them. They’re ill, you know?”

“No,” Mary shook her head. “Mister Proctor didn’t tell me anything. They’re sick?”

“Yeah. Real sick. Ain’t wakin’ up. The Reverend has been throwin’ a huge fit over them.” Mercy explained, “I’m surprised you never heard him howlin’!” Then, doing a horrible imitation of Reverend Samuel Parris’s voice, she wailed, “Oh Betty, Betty! Wake, my sweet daughter! Wake! Why won’t you wake?!”

She clung to Mary’s arm dramatically. “God! God! Why have you forsaken me?! What have you struck my little girls with?!”

Mary couldn’t help but giggle softly. Still, her mind was made up on the whole ordeal.

“Tell them my pardons and prayers,” she said, grabbing the fallen sickle. “My master said I gotta tend to the crops. Then I can go to town. But I am not spendin’ my free time meddlin’ in someone else’s affairs.”

Mercy groaned loudly and snatched the sickle away from Mary, making her yelp.

“Live a little, will ya? Let’s go see poor Abby and Betty!” Mercy urged. “To Hell with your master right now. You can’t let him lead you around by a leash all the time. Deal with the consequences later. Let’s go!”

Mary stared into the older girl’s eyes and then sighed, giving in. She stood up- Mercy was taller than her, as she always had been. “Lead on, Mercy.”

Mercy brightened.

Together, the two of them snuck out of the Proctor property, careful as to not get caught by one of the many children roaming the plantation.

Technically, the Proctor’s had eighteen children, though four were dead and eleven were brought forth by two different women, both of which had also passed over the seasons. The only living child of John Proctor’s first wife, Martha Giddens, was Benjamin, a tall, lanky man who could never seem to grow a beard, yet had hair down to his shoulders. He was thirty-three and didn’t talk to Mary very often, but when he did, he greatly critiqued her work in the field. That farm was his pride and joy, and it was a challenge to not roll her eyes when he would go on about the importance of their crops and proper plant care.

Elizabeth II was the second oldest at twenty-nine, and helped Elizabeth Proctor run the tavern with her other siblings: Martha IV, twenty-six (the first two Martha’s had died when they were both infants, along with the woman they were named after); Mary II, twenty-five; John II, twenty-four; Mary III, twenty-three; and Thorndike, twenty. Why Proctor decided to have TWO daughters named Mary was beyond Mary herself, but it wasn’t uncommon for things to become confusing when their name was shouted for whatever reason.

Elizabeth Proctor’s children stayed on the farm, helping clean and take care of the livestock: William, eighteen; Sarah fifteen; Samuel, seven; Elisha, five; Abigail, three; and Joseph, one. Mercy often made jokes that Elizabeth had obviously been the one to name the kids, as they were actually creative and not repeating several times over.

But with so many watchmen on the property, Mary was surprised about how easy it was to slip away unseen.

The road was loose and crunched loudly beneath their footfalls. Mercy kept kicking a rock, and Mary watched it bounce across the ground.

“So, what’s wrong with Betty and Abby?” Mary asked.

Mercy smirked widely.

“There be witches about, Mary.”

[being-held]

There’s Something Strange About How It All Began by Alexis Pera

A draft piece for a book not yet written. Enjoy.

I.  eight when I first caught fire. It was a cold day in my village, as it usually was, near the shores of the lake where my family’s home was built. It was a small dwelling in my home region of Plivium. It rained a lot in Plivium, unlike the rest of Alienis, and no one knew why, or no one really cared. It was home, no one questions that. But, when  it wasn’t pouring, most Plivumians preferred to be outside. We kind of had to be, or else the work would never be done, the harvest never brought up, and the damages never fixed. So as my parents worked, I was free to roam and explore.

    Yet, out of all the land my parents had, all the forests and rivers and ponds, I loved my father’s garden, beautiful in every sense of the word. He had grown flowers of every color and nurtured trees so full of fruit we could never harvest them all. It was my favorite place in the entire world. I would run through the paths, looking up the entire time as I watched the trees rush by and the leaves brush my legs as I went. Who knows how many times I fell, or tripped, or just ran full on into things. My father would always scold me about being more careful, but he would have a smile on his face because he was more than amused by how happy I was despite having just run into a tree or tripped over some vines. My mother would be more upset, she didn’t like seeing me hurt, even if I wasn’t upset about it, and I always had bruises and scratches but a smile on my face. Of course, that all stopped the day I Specialized.

    Most children didn’t Specialize until they were older, when they were turning into grown men and women, but I didn’t. I was still a child, still scared of the stories my parents told me about Specializing, still carefree and unable to prepare for what would happen.

    Because gaining your Specialty and becoming one with nature was something that usually didn’t come in a nice package with a pretty bow. It was painful and unpredictable, and with my family’s bloodline, my Specialty was to be even more so.

    The wind was strong that day, or so I thought at least, and it kept growing more and more until the chill in my spine wouldn’t go away. Then my small kid brain finally realized that none of the trees or plants were swaying from its force, and that my clothes and hair were still in place. I was then wondering why I was so cold and why it felt like someone was waving cold air on my neck. I didn't have much time to think about it.

    A searing pain had bloomed in my temples, my vision and balance immediately going awry. It was paralyzing, and as I hit the dirt, a terribly cold tingling took over my hands and arms.

    My mother found me first, and she was the one who first saw the visible effects of what was happening. My fingers, hands, and lower arms had turned completely black, right up to my elbows. And though it seemed as if I stuck my hands into a smoldering fire pit, my skin was entirely numb to feeling. The headache had faded and vision only slightly better at that point, so I was left sitting on the ground staring at my arms as if they didn’t belong to me. In that moment, it didn’t feel like they did.

    Then the second wave hit.

    While my vision cleared enough for me to see and the overall pain had deadened to a dull throbbing, my arms sparked and white flames enveloped them. I couldn’t feel it, I couldn’t stop it, I could barely see it, but I screamed and yelled and cried. My mother didn’t know what to do, neither did my father when he finally found us. They couldn’t come near, and my mother learned that the hard way. She hated seeing me in pain, so her motherly instinct to hold me, to comfort me, backfired when she tried. She now has a large burn scar down her right arm, a daily reminder of how dangerous I was.

    Because to the horror of myself, my mother, and my father, I had managed to inherit one of the rarest and most dangerous Specialties known to our world, called Aerdior. The unfortunate ability to conjure heat from one’s skin. My version of it, of course, came with the bonus of flames.

    I don’t remember the rest of that day. I just know that my parents had to reach out to one of our neighbors, who could manipulate water, to put me out. And that that day was when everything became different.

II.

    I can’t count how many times in a day I used to catch fire. At first, it was really often, every hour or so, and that’s how I was forced to learn how to will it away. And eventually I could. And after a month, it would go down to every two hours. And after another month, three to four hours.

    By the time I was nine, I could go at least two days without catching, on a good week.

    I also can’t count how many times I’ve hurt someone or something around me. It would come so suddenly, I never had enough time to get away from whatever I was touching. My father had a couple burns on his shoulders and arms, my mother on her fingers and hands. I banned myself from my father’s garden after I destroyed almost half of my father’s rare Cossia flowers, and later from even going outside when I injured a creature that had come too close. I spent most of my time in my room, where anything that wasn’t or couldn’t be fireproofed had been removed. I cried when my mother wanted to take my books, but my father, who taught me to love and cherish reading, spent almost two weeks trying to figure out a way for me to keep them. He finally found the perfect mixture of plants and special roots to create paper that couldn’t burn. And he then spent the next several months copying all of my favorite books onto the special paper so I could read them. I only have one of those copies now.

    I was terrified and paranoid of my Specialty, and of what I could do. No matter where I was or who I was with, I had to watch what I touched and how I handled things. Before long, I was labeling everything as burnable or unburnable, what I can’t touch and what I can, who I couldn’t take the chance on and who I could. It was an unbearable existence for a nine year old child.

    And then we moved.

    I say moved like it was optional, like we made the choice, but truly, we weren’t just changing scenery, we were running.

    I don’t remember much of it. One day we were happy; my mother, my father, me, and the little baby in my mother’s belly that we were all so excited for. Then the next, I was being dragged through the forest by my parents who kept insisting everything was alright. Right up until it wasn’t.

    My father died that day, protecting us. My mother will only tell me that without him saving us, we wouldn’t have escaped, we wouldn’t have made it to earth, the Connected World.

    It’s been nine years, and she still refuses to tell me more.

    But now, I only catch randomly, with no pattern. A rushing feeling will run down my spine, and then my fingers will start turning black. If I don’t separate myself from my surroundings and put all my willpower into making it go away, I will eventually catch, though it’s much slower on earth.

    My mother would always tell me that it was all a blessing in disguise, that coming to earth was good because I was less likely to hurt others. I used to believe that, and maybe a small part of me still does, but now I know that it doesn’t make a difference. Who am I to have a better life when my father never got to live the rest of his?

III.

    My little sister was born the day we came to earth. Because of the way we came, in the chaos and madness, my mother went into labor not even an hour after arriving. We had come through the Pathway into an old church, which had seemed to be abandoned with no one left to take care of it. I was the only one there to help my mother as she gave birth.

    It was a horribly long, terribly painful, and rather traumatizing experience that I would never like to experience again. But once it was over, we had another problem to handle. Because my little sister didn’t come out crying.

    My mother had pretty much passed out once the baby was out, so I was left to try to understand what was happening. It was, fortunately, not long before I realized that my sister wasn’t dead. She was still moving and her heart still beating, with her face scrunched up as if she wanted to cry but just couldn’t get it out. She was mute, a birth defect common to Plivumians.

    I had shifted my mother into a lying position and covered her with an old curtain I found, then proceeded to wrap my new born sister in the torn up cloth from my shirt. I held her as she slept, and didn’t sleep myself, and that night I named her. I never asked my mother after if she liked the name I picked, or of she was upset that I did, but I was fully convinced that my father would have loved it.

    I named her after my father’s two favorite flowers, the ones which he had spent years growing to be perfect for their blooming season, and the ones I adored more than any of the others. Her name was Pella Cossia, my little sister. And the only thing I thoroughly remember from that day, was the promise I made to her, that I would never let her get hurt, that I would protect her no matter the costs.

    I still keep that promise, and I don’t ever plan on breaking it.

IV.

    We found the dwelling, or town, as the earthans called it, that the church belonged to, and met many people who were confused about who we were and what had happened to us. One person called himself an officer, and he helped us find clothes and food. We also met a lady who gave my mother a job at a restaurant, which at the time was a very strange concept, as we didn’t have restaurants or food suppliers back in Plivium. But we adapted quickly, and it was only a year of taking help and staying in hotels before my mother could finally afford a home.

    It was a small, unkept, dirty place, but we were decent enough at cleaning and home-keeping to get it livable again.

    By the time we found out about school, I was twelve and completely unqualified. But due to the laws of the land, and the strict suggestions of anyone we knew, my mother thought it wise to send me to school. The idea of school seemed promising, an organization built to help children learn and grow in the world, but the actual reality of it was a lot more disappointing. The education part was pretty much an afterthought, as the talking, sports, and teasing took the forefront. I came to be a wallflower, even more so because of the... heat problem. People liked to point out that I wore sweaters and gloves all the time, even when it was warm; little did they know that I couldn’t feel warmth at all, or cold for that matter. The sweaters and gloves were more for a safety precaution(made of a special heat resistant material that took years to find and use), and a comforting mechanism.

    I caught up quickly; in my studies, that is. I was pretty much enthralled with anything I didn’t already know, as we didn’t have education anything close to Earthan education back home, where we learned to read, write, count, and that was it. In Plivium, reading more than what basic training required was like being a genius, which both my father and myself easily overstepped. But on earth, being an avid reader was somewhat normal, and even the small amount of people who actually enjoyed learning maths and science and literature were many more than at home. I also had more than enough time on my hands, as I still stayed cooped up in my bedroom with things least fire-prone. I had more books than clothes, and more library passes than shoes, which I was more than okay with. I enjoyed it, even if school itself was much less than fun and little more than torture.

    Though as high school came, with my Specialty growing stronger and more worrisome, my mother thought it time to pull me out. At that time, I wasn’t attached to school, as long as I got to keep the books and the library trips. My mother obliged, but, unfortunately, she was still listening to coworkers and neighbors. Because apparently, by the time your fifteen, your supposed to have a job. Which, of course, my mother and I thought strange and ridiculous, because the whole employment thing was an entirely different situation at home. But we adapted anyway, and I managed to get a job at a small bookstore in town, but only because it was run by an older lady who majorly needed help.

    I still work there today, and Mrs. Gorgio is like the grandma I never had, feeding me when I forget myself and praying when she knows my mother has a job interview. She instantly fell in love with Pella, and asks about her every day I come in. Pella doesn’t like books as much, preferring music and other loud ways of expressing herself, but she likes Mrs. Gorgio and the fact that the older lady wasn’t shocked to find she can’t speak. Pella comes in once a week, and is continually teaching Mrs. Goegio sign language so that it’s easier for them to communicate. I sometimes watch them interact, sitting in the big cushion chairs in the back of the shop, laughing and smiling and gesturing. It’s rather funny to see Mrs. Gorgio get the movements wrong, in which Pella will simply smile and correct her with gentle fingers.

    When we walk home together, Pella will sign to me the whole way, explaining what they were working on and how Mrs. Gorgio has the best taste in music and why the old lady always wears that rusty necklace around her neck. Though I trip on the bumpy sidewalks and my own feet watching her hands fly, I don’t ever shove it off. I know how much it means to her, and that she looks forward to that one day of the week when I take her.

    It also distracted me, helped me pretend that our lives were normal. And that we weren’t foreigners in disguise, tricking everyone into believing we belonged, when we really truly didn’t.

[goldvnby]

biography

i. — ‹ ( if there were two guarantees in edward’s life from the very start they were that 1. finding success and upholding his parents’ precious reputation was his only option, and 2. he would not receive the privilege of finding happiness for himself. his family was far from a perfect match for the young boy. his pulse always seemed to race a little faster, his room would get a little messier, and his mind would wander a little farther. still, however, they were nothing if not persistent and by the end of his childhood edward had inherited their overbearing sense of pride. they hardly deserved to be as proud as they were. an affluent and well known family for their little corner of vermont but hardly much to write home about when contrasted against the mega rich only a state away. still, they had enough money to wear their wealth on their sleeves, occupying the largest ( and gaudiest ) home in town and speeding around in luxury cars. his father’s income was enough to support their lifestyle, which allowed his mother to focus on developing a prominent reputation within the community. ).

ii. — ‹ ( when he tells people off his childhood he paints it in a warm light, the good money american dream of scorching summer days by the lake and cozy vermont winters in the ski chalets. in reality, if his childhood was anything it was cold. neither of his parents left much time for their only son, and they spared even less time for each other. whenever possible his mother would head to a warmer climate to vacation and his father would jet off on whatever business trips he could. the times that they were together the pair would alternate between icy silence and fiery arguments. the final blow to their marriage came in edward’s sixteenth year while he was away at boarding school, his mother caught his father with another woman and all hell broke loose. it was a messy divorce that left edward in the crossfire. all in all his parents left him with a pessimistic idea of love and marriage, if he even believed in it at all. one of the major roots of his commitment issues is his fear that he is his father’s son. as it turns out his father had never been a faithful man and edward has simply accepted as fact that the streak of infidelity would continue in him. it seemed easier to accept it at that than to try at love and fail. failure, after all, goes against everything that edward stands for. ).

iii. — ‹ ( when he reached high school, edward was swiftly sent away from his parents home to whatever prestigious boarding schools they could stick him in for the colder months. the schools quickly became harder and harder to find, however, as this was when edward developed his tendency towards debauchery. being surrounded by nothing but other privileged youth he quickly discovered that the perfect mixture of confidence, brashness, and general disregard for the rules, could instantly earn him all the love and attention he lacked in his childhood. he mastered the art of charming the pants off of just about everyone. unfortunately, many schools didn’t much care for his antics and by his senior year, he had thoroughly exhausted almost all the institutions on the eastern seaboard. despite his rambunctious nature and tendency to be expelled, he was still quite successful in his academic pursuits. his charisma, well learned manners, and intelligence earned him the favour of many professors, and he graduated with high grades and a long list of references. outside of academics he always earned himself a place on the lacrosse and ski teams to make friends, as well as the debate team to make enemies. high school was also when he began to establish a long line of meaningless flings and broken hearts. he craved the attention and had more than enough confidence and charm to get it, but he would bolt before things could become serious. he always wanted more. his pride made it impossible to see anyone as worthy of him, his stubbornness made it so he could never see eye to eye with anyone, and his cynicism made him doubt that love was even possible at all. above all, loneliness had always been the dominant factor in his life, and to abandon that was terrifying. ).

iv. — ‹ ( after a gap year spent flitting around europe without purpose ( during which he came dangerously close to destroying himself as well as his liver ), edward found himself studying commerce at columbia. he instantly took to the city. it felt like for the first time in his life everything around him was alive with opportunity. to him it was a place to prove himself, and more than anything he wanted to be part of the upper crust of new york society. when he sets his mind to something edward is nothing if not determined. his act was cleaned up overnight. while he didn’t abandon his hedonistic ways, he relegated them to part of his life where they couldn’t interfere with his upward trajectory. late nights spent making and losing memories in the city were met with hot coffee and hard work in the mornings. with his revelry all compacted into short bursts it became even more volatile. his penchant for self destruction became a general disregard for his own life, and there wasn’t a stunt edward wouldn’t pull for the admiration of others. yet contrasting this completely his daytime in university was spent buttering up professors, joining the best societies, and working the most prestigious internships. by the end of the four years his life was falling into place, and everything was ready for success. ).

v. — ‹ ( things can never really work out for edward though, it’s practically a fact to him by now. just six months before his graduation his father became the centre of a hefty fraud case. not only did he have to deal with his family money being wiped out and his father receiving a jail sentence, the fallout of the scandal seeped into all elements of his life. his career path was hugely derailed. any family connections he had were wiped clean, and the ones he had built up on his own quickly started to disappear as word got out of what had happened. potential employers only had to do a quick google search of his name to discover the familial connection. it took several years for him to build up his credibility and get his life back on track. although he’s now finding success, the murky waters he started out in are not something he’ll easily forget. as for his father, while it isn’t exactly something he can keep a secret, those who know edward know to never bring the man up around him. it’s rare that he’ll confide in anyone about it, even raphael knows only what he can learn from others. he visits the penitentiary once a year on his father’s birthday, and always makes up a lie for why he’s going out of town. ).

vi.  — ‹ ( most of the time edward feels like he’s just waiting for the other shoe to drop. things are going smoothly career wise, he’s shockingly happy being monogamous with raphael, and he feels secure in his friend group. it all seems too good to be true, or too good to be true for edward at least.  there’s a darkness in edward, and so far as he can tell it always manages to soak up every bit of good in his life. he worries that by letting people close to him they’re just going to get caught in the crossfire. he’s at a precipice in his life and it can go one of two ways. he can either shape up and settle down, creating the life he’s always needed and never thought he can have, or he can continue down the path of self destruction, walking right into the life he always feared but didn’t know how to escape. ).

vii. — ‹ ( he’s always been extremely loyal with those he considers his closest friends and that certainly isn’t changing anytime soon, especially with nico. while from an outside perspective edward may seem like a pushy and inconsiderate friend, the reality is far different. while he lacks commitment romantically with friends when he really, truly believes that someone cares about him he returns that commitment tenfold. still, he finds it hard to believe that someone would stick around with him for so long. as for lucy, he values her and fears her in equal measure. he’s certain that she has the ability to turn everyone against him in one fell swoop if she wanted to, and she wouldn’t exactly be without her reasons. she sees right through him, in fact, he’s pretty sure she knows him better than he knows himself, which is quite terrifying for someone who doesn’t like for their true self to be known at all. at the same time, it makes her an easy person to turn to when things get rough. the sting of sophia’s rejection still burns him more than he liked to admit. he likes to get what he wants, and it was more than a bit shocking for the rug to get pulled out from under him like that. he can’t help but feel like its confirmation that there really is something wrong with him, and he feels a pang of insecurity every time she walks into the room. the good thing to come out of the mess with sophia is raphael. he still can’t believe it’s real, and having the same person to fall asleep to every night is actually helping a lot with his insomnia. once he felt secure with raph ( something he’s never found in a romantic relationship before ) he went all in. but he’s had his bad boy behaviour on pause for a while now and he isn’t sure how much longer he can keep it up. he just expects to fail, he’s sure he’ll slip up and ruin it sometime soon. he uses that certainty in his shortcomings like a crux so that when he does blow things up he can say he saw it coming all along. still, he wishes that raphael would just realize the mess he’s gotten himself into and run for the hills now, because edward is getting more and more attached every day. he’s even starting to see a future with raph, and the hope that stirs in his chest makes him feel a little sick. ).

[pinkevilbobdoesthings]

Okay guys, content warning on this one. There’s body horror in this chapter. Just giving you a heads up.

So here’s Chapter 5 of ‘Make You Scared’.

Caleb focused on keeping his breath even, on keeping calm and trying to deny the fear creeping up on him. Ikithon wanted him to be afraid, and there was no way Caleb was going to give him what he wanted. Unfortunately, Caleb was terrified. Everything about the room haunted his nightmares, and it was all Caleb could do to keep himself from whimpering like a child. 

"Well, let's see how you are doing," Ikithon said entering Caleb's room. He tapped on the current iv bag dripping solution into Caleb. "You know, at first you were a complete failure. I was furious with how you'd turn out negative result after negative result. But then I realized that I was looking for the wrong results." Ikithon turned off the drip of the iv bag and unhooked it. "See, you were supposed to be a greater unending resource of fear, but you weren't. Certainly you were scared; you're very good at being afraid, but your fear was very pedestrian. A disappointment really." Picking up an IV bag filled with a dark sludgy mixture, he hooked it up to Caleb. "But then I thought to look for something else in you. And oh it turned out that you were fun of all sorts of mysteries and answers we never thought to ask." He flicked on the switch for the IV drip. "And then you left me." Anger and hatred dripped from his voice. "You've caused a bunch of delays, I'll have you know."

Caleb watched as the sludge went through the clear tube towards his arm. It was slower than most of what Ikithon saw fit to inject into him. 

Ikithon chuckled as Caleb squirmed trying to get away from the inevitable. "Really, you should've learned by now that struggling doesn't change anything. I mean it's amusing to watch, but that's not what I'm here for, not really. But for all my complaints, your escape taught me some things. Most of them about doing proper screenings on security, but your return shown me things that I wouldn't have dared test. You're very adventurous to try monster food. Most humans would've gotten violently ill before they ate even half as much as you did. But you're not entirely human anymore now are you, Bren." 

Freezing, Caleb stared at him. A thousand questions ran through his mind, but the cursed gag stopped them all. The sludgy solution from the IV enter his vein and a hot pain went through him. He shook uncontrollably covered in sweat. "There's no point in fighting it," Ikithon said. "It will run its course no matter what. Now, there's something I must attend to, but I'll be back by the time you're done." He patted the IV bag.

Bile rose up in Caleb's throat, but he forced it back down. Being sick with the gag was not an experience that Caleb wanted to repeat. His brain was in a fog and he tried to focus, but all he could think of was the pain. Hands touched his arm and he tried to pull away. "Caleb, Caleb, it's okay, it's me." Caleb squinted to see a blue face. Jester. She took the gag out of his mouth and pulled the needle out of his arm. The IV bag was already empty. More time must’ve passed than he had realized.

Caleb tried to sit up, but he fell back down onto the bed. "You found me." His voice was dry and croaky. "You actually found me."

"Of course I did," Jester said.

"I'm sorry no one found you. You shoulda been found." Caleb could feel himself rambling, but he couldn't stop his tongue. "I shoulda found you."

Jester carefully picked Caleb up lifting him out of the bed. "You weren't even in the monster world, Caleb."

"Caleb, that's my name," he said clinging to Jester like a lifeline. "Caleb should've found you."

"Well, Caleb's found me now. Caleb's a very good friend," Jester said gently.

Caleb shuddered in her arms. The shaking still hadn't gone away. "No, he's not. He’s not a good thing.” He looked up at her. “You're blue." His head hurt and everything felt fuzzy.

"Yes, I am blue."

He rested his head on her shoulder. "Blue's favorite."

"Yeah?"

“I like Jester.” Caleb had trouble quite remembering where he was, but everything hurt and he liked whatever was holding him.

There was a pause. “Oh, well, Jester likes you too.”

He tried to move his hand, but it was a thousand pounds and too heavy for him. “She shouldn’t. ‘M bad.” His head dropped down and he couldn’t lift it.

“Caleb. Caleb!” The voice was pretty but scared.

His tongue was itchy, thick and hurt, but he managed a hum of acknowledgement.

“Oh, don’t scare me like that. I know it’s my fault Ikithon got you again, but I need you to be okay.”

He wanted to tell her something, but he couldn’t think of what it was and his mouth wouldn’t open. Instead his mouth ached and he was certain his teeth were falling out. A pressure built up in his head until it felt like it was splitting. Like a hot whip, a searing pain burned along his spine. Instead of fingers, it felt like he had blades shoved into his hands. Then suddenly everything was so much pain all he could see was white.

And then the pain cleared, and Jester was looking down at Caleb her eyes wide with concern and fear. “Caleb,” she gasped.

Caleb stared at his hands. His fingers were replaced with long, sharp claws. “Jester?” It came out messy and slurred. Running his tongue over his teeth, Caleb discovered that they fangs, huge and fearsome. He looked up at Jester hoping for some explanation that would undo all of it.

“Caleb,” she said, her voice full of confusion and care, “you’re a monster.”

***

Jester still held Caleb in her arms. It didn’t make sense. None of it made any sense. Caleb was human, and humans did not just become monsters. The only explanation she could come up with was Ikithon must’ve done something to him with all those tubes and syringes. But it shouldn’t have been possible.

Caleb stared down at his hands in disbelief. No longer were there pupils in his eyes; instead just blueness. Four pairs of tiny horns protruded out of his hair. Jester had to adjust her grip on Caleb for the bony protrusions jutting out of his back. A bristly tail hung limpy from the base of his spine. She had never seen monster quite like him before but he wouldn't have stuck out of a crowd. 

"Well," Jester said trying to look on the positive side, "You're a very handsome monster."

He just looked up at her wanly.

"Sorry. But I thought you should know." Jester wished there was something that she could do for him. She couldn't imagine what it must have felt like. What would she do if she were suddenly a human? Probably cry. "Are you okay?"

"I-" but it just sounded like he had a bunch of snakes in his mouth and long thin tongue slipped out from behind his large fangs. Caleb ran his hand through his hair and stopped when he got to the horns. The look he gave Jester was heartbreaking.

Jester pushed down the dread in her heart and smiled at Caleb softly. "I'll get you out of here."

"Will you now?" a voice said behind her. Jester turned around to see Ikithon. "I believe you have my property there and must request that you put it back where you found it."

"You have no right," Jester said. "He's not yours, he's a human being and shouldn't be here."

Ikithon chuckled. "I believe you mean monster. Or rather a hybrid, I suppose. Don't believe I've gotten rid of all the human from him, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's not like I was trying to just make a monster. Any two monsters can do that."

Caleb shuddered in Jester's arms. "You," he said.

"I? I gave you a gift. You don't need to fear anything now. You are something new and marvelous," Ikithon said. "True, you don't have much purpose in the world, but for science, you will show us so many new possibilities."

"Change him back." Jester stared down at Ikithon. 

Ikithon gave her a look of disgust. "Why in the world would I do that? Not that I could, but there's so many tests we can do on him. We can see what the true divide and difference between humans and monsters is. Bren is the answers to all the questions we never thought to ask."

"He's not Bren and he's not yours!" Jester shouted. Caleb gripped her arm accidentally scratching her, but she didn’t mind.

"Then whose is he? Something like him has no place in the world. Hybrids like him are unnatural and get rejected by the world. It is my place to care for him as no one else will," Ikithon said it like he was doing a grand and noble thing he was doing.

Jester looked down at Caleb. He looked so small and dejected in her arms staring still at his hands. "I will," Jester said. "He can be mine and I will care for him." She smiled at Caleb and the shock on his face. "It wouldn't be a hard thing to do."

Ikithon made a sour face. "You are a fool if you think you could be happy with a thing like that. He was a human. A creature capable of the most terrible things. His kind kill and destroy for fun."

"And you don't?" Caleb asked. His tongue would slip out of his mouth long and thin and he tripped over his words, but Caleb kept going. "You've destroyed everything you've touched. My mother, my father, me! You are are just as bad as a human."

Ikithon shook his head chuckling softly. "I'm a monster and am as nature made me. Humans are supposed to be more."

"Jester is more. She's more than anyone can ask for." Caleb looked up at Jester with the softest look in his eyes and shifted to get out of her arms. She let him down, but Jester kept an arm around Caleb hardly believing the kind words he was saying about her. "You can't say that to be monster is to be horrible if she is one. Nothing that is even slightly like her can claim to be awful by nature. Your evils are entirely by your own doing!" Ikithon snarled showing off his fangs. They weren't as big as Jester's or Caleb's, and Caleb just laughed. "You're nothing! I was an idiot to be scared of you. What are you?! Just an old man with a needle!"

"Watch your tongue, you filthy thing!" Ikithon spat. "I can destroy you without a second thought."

Caleb's legs were shaking and he leaned most of his weight against Jester, but he held his head up like he was a noble king. "You're the one that made a filthy thing. How does that reflect on you? A doddering old fool wasting his time on a pointless folly."

"And Caleb's not filthy," Jester added feeling like she needed to say something. 

Caleb glanced at Jester and barely shook his head. He returned his glare to Ikithon. “What are you? A monster? Ha, you are nothing.”

With a wordless roar, Ikithon launched himself at Caleb. "Run!" Caleb said shoving himself away from Jester. Ikithon tackled Caleb and the two tumbled head over heels crashing into tables of medical equipment. Jester backed away almost frozen with fear. With loud snarls and growls Caleb clawed at Ikithon, but the old monster's scales were too thick to break through.

Ikithon laughed mirthlessly as his hands wrapped around Caleb's neck. "You stupid boy. Not even a monster for five minutes and you try to pick a fight. I should've never wasted my time with you. Oh well, I can still learn from an autopsy.”

Jester looked around in a hurry and grabbed the first thing she could find, a clipboard, and slammed it against Ikithon’s shoulder.

He hissed out in annoyance, but his hands remained firmly around Caleb's throat as Caleb turned blue. "Idiot! Don't think you'll get away with this. I'll have my revenge on you, but first I'll dispose of this filth!"

"Caleb isn't filthy!" Jester yelled kicking Ikithon in the head.

The old man stumbled and his grip on Caleb loosened.

Jester grabbed Caleb and dragged him and and towards the door. "You were supposed to run," Caleb said coughing.

"You're my responsibility. I wasn't going to leave you." Jester tried to open the door only to find it locked.

"Did you think I was foolish enough to let you escape?" Ikithon asked. "I wasn't going to do that. Now you're going to just give up quietly and no one is going to get hurt."

Jester glared at him showing her fangs. "Why would I do that? I’m not dumb enough to believe you. You're not getting Caleb!"

"I wasn't talking to you," Ikithon snarled. "You want her to stay safe, don't you?"

Caleb nodded and approached Ikithon his fists clenched to his sides. 

"Caleb! Don't'!" Jester screamed. "There's a better way! There has to be."

Ikithon smirked at Caleb returned to him. "I knew you'd listen to reason. Always were a soft one, weren't you?"

Caleb just nodded. "She'll be safe, right?"

"She’ll rest in peace," Ikithon said. He laughed at Caleb's glare. "I can’t let her run about revealing what I’ve been doing here, can I? A man has to keep his secrets."

Caleb glared at him and then started coughing so hard that he doubled over low to the floor.

"Get up!” Ikithon demanded. Jester started to move forward, but Ikithon held up a hand. "Make another move and I will kill him right where he stands."

Jester stood back fighting the tears. 

Caleb pushed himself up off the ground and stood up leaning against the wall. He was panting with exertion.

"A weak thing, aren't you," Ikithon said.

Caleb nodded and then lightning fast jabbed two needles into each side of Ikithon's neck. Ikithon clawed at the needles as Caleb sunk down the plungers. With a gasp, Ikithon sunk down to the ground and then fell over.

"You knocked him out!" Jester said. "We gotta get out." She knelt down next to Ikithon and took the key to the door out of his pocket.

Caleb shook his head slowly staring down at Ikithon. "No, not knocked out."

Jester froze half way through unlocking the door. "You killed him?"

"Yes." He stared down at Ikithon silently. “He was going to kill you.”

“He was going to kill you too, Caleb.” Jester lightly put her hand on Caleb’s shoulder and turned him away from the dead body.

Caleb followed her numbly to the door. “I just killed a man. What am I?”

“You’re Caleb and my friend. You were hurt bad by a bad monster and now you’re a good monster,” Jester said as she unlocked it letting them out.

“Am I a good monster?” Caleb asked looking incredibly lost and hurt.

Jester grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze as she led him through the old abandoned hospital. It was late and  Ikithon was the only one there, but Jester was starting to think that he had set that up to be a trap for them. “You’re a very good monster. And one that I’m going to take care of.”

Caleb shook his head weakly.  “You don’t have to. I can take care of myself.”

“Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Monsters aren’t supposed to be alone. And neither are humans, and I think that that goes for hybrids like you,” Jester said double checking the halls just in case someone else was there. Nott should be up at the front of the hospital gathering evidence of the illegal experiments Ikithon was running. “Besides, I don’t think you can take care of yourself. Do you know anything about being a monster?”

Caleb let out half a chuckle.  “You have a point there. But it doesn’t have to be you.”

Jester pouted at him. “I gave Ikithon my word that I’d take care of you.”

“And you always keep your word?” Caleb asked.

Jester nodded. “I do. Besides, there’s kind of another reason why I want to.”

“And what is that?”

Before Jester could lose her nerve, she kissed Caleb on the cheek. “I like you.”

Caleb’s cheeks and horns turned red and he sputtered. “I like you too,” he said, ducking his head down. Jester laughed and hooked her tail around Caleb’s. His eyes went wide with surprise. “Oh, oh, I could get used to this.”

[lamptracker]

FIC: Counting Down the Days, part 2

FIC: Counting Down the Days, part 2

Pairing: Peter Parker/Female Reader

Inspo: “Cancer” by My Chemical Romance

Summary:  While visiting a children’s hospital as his alter ego Spider-Man, Peter meets a girl his age. She’s sweet, she’s smart, she’s funny… and she’s dying of cancer. When she laments the fact that she probably won’t get to live long enough to have the typical teenage experiences of prom and a boyfriend, Peter offers to fill those roles for her.

Part summary: Peter tells the reader what it felt like when he got Snapped. 

Warnings: Talk of death. The usual cursing (he is from Queens). Endgame spoiler. Making fun of soccer moms who want to talk to the manager.

Tagged: @flokidottir-imagines-br  @babyplutoszx2   @musiclover1263   @judemoos   @drxgxnslxyer   @hollanderheart   @thequeensardine   @ive-got-some-lies-to-tell   @captainbuckyy   @xxtomxo   @deleteidentity   @yessterekthings   @itsyaspacemom   @parrkerspeters   @starksparker

Part 1

**

“Alrighty,” Peter said, webbing (y/n)’s hospital room door shut and peeling off his mask. “One cinnamon chai latte for you, one white chocolate mocha for me.”

“Ew, white chocolate?”

“You’re judging me. This is supposed to be a judgment-free zone, (y/n).”

“Please, Peter. This is a hospital, not Planet Fitness.”

Peter just shook his head and laughed as he handed (y/n) her latte. They’d been texting back and forth over the last couple of days, getting to know each other a little better. She asked to see pictures of his friends; he happily obliged (after telling them what he was up to - sort of, in most cases).

“That’s my best friend Ned,” Peter said, pointing at the pictures he was projecting on the wall from his suit. “He knows I’m Spider-Man too, him and MJ.  He’s in Robotics Club and Academic Decathlon with me. That’s his girlfriend Betty, she’s on Student Council and she reads the announcements every morning. This is Michelle, also known as the aforementioned MJ. She’s on Academic Decathlon too. There’s Abe, and that’s Brad, and… oh, good, I see Flash found the phone that’s not built into my suit today.”

“Wow, that is exceptionally rude,” (y/n) said, squinting.

“Karen,” Peter muttered, “delete that.”

“Deleting,” Karen said as the photo disappeared; (y/n) laughed loudly.

“So wait, you’re friends with a dude named Flash?”

Peter scoffed loudly. “Not friends,” he muttered, “he’s been bullying me since the third grade. Did you know, (y/n), that he gave himself that nickname because his real name is Eugene?”

(Y/n) cracked up laughing. “Eugene?!” she exclaimed. “Well, fun fact, I went to school with a kid named Elmer. Heir to the McCormick spice fortune, and about as smart as a container of Italian seasoning too.”

Peter just shook his head. “Elmer,” he muttered as he and (y/n) started to sip their coffees.

“Wow,” (y/n) said. “I can’t remember the last time I had a good cup of coffee. The stuff here tastes like it was brewed with dish soap.”

Peter made a face. “We have a coffee pot, but I never drink coffee at home. I love my aunt May, I really do, but cooking is not her forte. And, unfortunately, that includes coffee. I’ve taught myself how to cook some things. Make a pretty mean chocolate chip cookie.”

“Well, I may have to try one of those sometime.” (Y/n) sipped her latte. “This almost feels like a real coffee date, y’know?”

Peter smiled. “Karen, open Spotify and play my Coffeehouse Favorites playlist, please?”

“Sure, Peter.” The air was soon filled with soft, jazzy music.

“Very nice!” (y/n) exclaimed. “Now we just need the middle-aged suburban mom with her may-I-speak-to-the-manager haircut complaining that her cappuccino isn’t foamy enough.”

“Well, I can’t reproduce that, but I can try.” Peter cleared his throat, next speaking in a weird sort of high-pitched voice. “I asked for light foam, does this look light to you??”

(y/n) giggled. “And there are 47 bubbles, I asked for 49. How hard is it to put 49 bubbles in my cappuccino foam?”

And then, in unison, they said: “Where is your manager?”

They both burst into laughter.

“I gotta tell you,” (y/n) said, “that I’ve only known you for, what, three days? And I’ve laughed more in this three days than I have in the last three years. You’re just… you’re so fun to be around. You come here to cheer people up, right? Guess what, Pete… it’s working.”

Peter smiled warmly at her. “Good, I’m glad.”

“Part of me wishes I’d met you earlier,” (y/n) said wistfully. “You know, before I got sick this last time. We could have had so much more time together. But… but I’m almost glad I met you when I did. Being faced with your own mortality really sucks, it’s nice to have a friend.”

“You know the Snap?” Peter said; (y/n) nodded. “I was one of the ones that got snapped.”

“Honestly? When it happened, I wish I’d been snapped. But… then everyone came back. So either way, I’d have to deal with this.” She gestured vaguely at the wires hooked up to various parts of her body. “But the nice part about that was, you didn’t know it was coming. You know? Like it just… happened. You didn’t have to suffer through it.”

“I knew.”

(y/n)’s eyes widened in shock. “You what?”

Peter swallowed thickly. “I knew what was happening. Because of my powers, my senses are, just, super heightened. I feel everything differently than everyone else. So yeah, for everyone else that got snapped, it was quick and painless but for me? I felt everything.”

(y/n)’s eyes grew wide. “Oh, God. What… what was that like? I mean, if you want to talk about it, if not I totally get it.”

Peter sighed. He knew one day he’d have to talk about it. He was kind of hoping he’d never have to. But, if it would help (y/n) feel better, he was willing to push his fear aside.

“Terrifying,” he finally replied. “I was terrified. I felt helpless, alone. Mr. Stark was right there, that helped me feel less alone. Physically it was weird, I could feel myself disintegrating. It wasn’t unbearably painful, but it was pretty uncomfortable. And then my soul just got… I don’t know, transported? Maybe? Sure, transported to the soul world. And it was five years, but it felt like five hours, it was really weird. But then… then I came back. I guess that’s the difference, though, I got to come back.”

(y/n) smiled. “Wow,” she said. “It’s nice to finally meet someone that knows what I’m going through. I’ve been faced with death over half my life and it scares me. I’ve felt so alone. But… now I don’t feel so alone anymore.” She reached over, gently grasping his still-gloved hand.

Peter gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “Glad to help.” He smiled at her again. “Um, that latte is getting cold. I don’t want to have to go get the manager.”

“Young man!” (y/n) exclaimed, in her fake customer voice. “This went down to 102 degrees, it needs to be at least 115!”

They burst into laughter yet again.

“What was it like, in the soul world?” (Y/n) asked softly.

Peter shrugged. “Wasn’t so bad. I didn’t feel anything physically. But internally, I felt very at peace. I… I got to see my parents and my Uncle Ben again. But they didn’t get to come back, that’s how the quantum thing worked. If you were dead before the Snap, you stayed dead. You know? But they got to tell me they were proud of me, that made me feel a lot better. I had this overwhelming, just… what was I so afraid of? This isn’t so bad. Then I realized that the thing I was scared of was the uncertainty. What’s happening to me? Where am I going to end up? That’s the part that got me. But once I got there… it was okay.”

“That makes me feel a lot better. Thanks, Peter.” She squeezed his hand again. “So what do I do now?”

“I… I don’t really know. What do you think you should do?”

“I think I should make the most of the time I have left,” (y/n) answered. “Not dwell on the dying part so much, focus on the living part. I know that sounds like all the schlocky bullshit they spout out in movies and whatnot but… but maybe there’s some good advice hidden in that.”

Peter just nodded solemnly.

“So,” (y/n) said, gulping down the last of her latte, “any plans this weekend?”

“I… oh, maybe. Karen, what’s my schedule this weekend?”

“You have an Academic Decathlon competition in Albany this weekend, be at the school by 5pm packed and ready to get on the bus. Estimated return time is 8pm Saturday.”

“And I’m co-captain with MJ this year,” Peter said, “so my presence is definitely required. I’ll get you a postcard or something though. And then I should probably do my rounds after I get home, and then I think I’m free Sunday.”

“New event added to calendar by Bruce Banner,” Karen said, “meeting at Avengers Tower at 2pm on Sunday.”

Peter chuckled. “...and I’ll try to stop by after that. If not, I will for sure Monday. But I’ll text you whenever I can, okay?”

“Sounds good.” (y/n) smiled. “Hey, thank you, by the way.”

“For what?”

“Everyone that comes in here thinks they need to walk on eggshells around me, not bring up the D word or whatever, you know? Thank you for not doing that. Thank you for treating me like I’m just an average everyday kid, and not an average everyday kid that happens to be walking around with a commuted sentence.”

Peter grinned at her. “Hey, anytime.”

“In a weird way,” (y/n) continued, “I’m almost glad I got sick.”

“Why’s that?” Peter asked, nose scrunched in confusion.

She smiled softly at him. “It brought me you.”

Peter could feel a blush creep over his cheeks as he searched for something to say. He settled for squeezing her hand again and replying, “I’m glad I met you too. Sucks it wasn’t sooner, but… better late than never, y’know?”

“Better late than never.” She grinned at him before releasing his hand. “Talk to you soon?”

“Yeah, definitely.”

[its-abroad-world]

Adventure #10 - June 18-20: Dresden, Germany, and Prague, Czech Republic: Trdelniks and Castles

June 18 - Dresden to Prague

I was sad to leave our cute little Airbnb but I was also excited because after a stop in Dresden, we would be going to Prague. Dresden was only 30 minutes away from where we stayed. My mom and her sister were the only ones who really wanted to visit the city, mostly because they had never been and had heard the name mentioned a lot in history and on travel shows. Other than that, we didn’t actually know anything about the city. It was only after the trip that I learned it used to be the capital of Saxony and was largely destroyed during WWII by massive bomb raids. We only stayed in the city for a couple of hours before hitting the road, but the best part of the city was eating yummy ice cream (forest berry, peach, and kiwi) to stave off the stifling heat. 

From Dresden to Prague (Praha), the drive was only about an hour and a half long (I slept) and when we entered the city, we were captivated. We drove around, a little lost trying to find the hostel that we would be staying at, but when we did find it, we promptly dropped off our luggage and headed back into the old city to find some lunch. Parking was really hard to find and because the street signs were in another language, we didn’t want to risk getting a ticket. Instead, we found a large mall located in the middle of the town where we could park. There was conveniently a bunch of restaurants to eat at there; we had Thai.

Because the mall was located right in Old Town, it was just a short walk into Old Town Square. It was hot that day and unbelievably crowded, enough for us to struggle to make our way through. There were dozens of street performers in the square and shops surround it all. From Old Town Square, you can see the Church of our Lady before Tyn (a gothic church from the 14th century), the Old Town City Hall (where the famous astronomical clock is located, and St. Nicholas Church (Malá Strana). 

While we were there, we purchased 24-hour train and bus passes that came out to about $12 each before proceeding to walk around the rest of the city. We were mostly looking at some websites that gave us the highlights of what the city had to offer, so we had no idea where we were going, but it didn’t matter because we were all feeling too drained from the heat and overwhelmed by the crowds to continue walking around. We all opted to go back to the hostel to take naps and go back out at night with the hopes that it would be less crowded if we went later.

We rested from about 6 pm to 8:30 pm; the beauty of Europe in the summer is that the sun sets really late, giving you more time to walk around). We were most surprised that my mom and aunt wanted to join us three girls for a night out on the town because they’re usually against staying out late. The tram stop was only a block from our hostel and only took less than 15 minutes to get to the edge of Old Town (no public transportation went directly into Old Town). We had eaten at the hostel but stopped for food when we saw a row of food shacks that were selling trdelniks (chimney cakes) and spit-roasted ham served with bread and gnocchi in a cream sauce. The trdelniks were especially delicious; we ordered plain one and one with a Nutella slathered inside. They roll out bread dough into a long cord and wrap it around a stick that spins when placed on a rack above a bed of wood coals and then coated with cinnamon sugar when they are done. 

The city was just as enchanting at night as it was during the day, maybe even more so. However, it was still fairly crowded because now all of the younger people were out to go clubbing and there were also still some guided tour groups walking around. Because there were fewer people, we were able to see some of the sights better, like the Astronomical Clock on the outside of the Old Town City Hall. The clock was built in 1410 complete with its own legend: the clockmaker was so determined to build a better, bigger, more beautiful clock than his rival that he went insane and killed himself in the clock’s gears, cursing the clock; anyone who would try to fix it would either go insane or die. While this legend isn’t actually true, it is a testament to the beauty of the clock. It was more grand and beautiful than the clock in Rostock, and while this clock still has a parade of the Apostles, it’s calendar uses are no longer in function. It was actually really cool because when we were leaving to go back to the hostel, we saw the clock strike 11 and there was a little show. 

That night we were also able to see Prague Castle in the distance from the side of Charles Bridge, however, we felt discouraged from going on the bridge because of the sheer amount of bugs swarming around the lights there. It was really gross and we took our pictures and fled from the bugs in the smaller alleyways lined with little shops filled with souvenirs and nicknacks where we bought a few things to take home to friends and family. After that, we went back to the hostel, only to find that my dad had left the window cracked and a ton of bugs had come in, attracted to the light. I slept under my blankets, slathered in bug repellent that night. 

June 19 - Prague Day 2

Our plan the second day in the city was to see everything that we didn’t get to see the day before and because we already had 24-hour public transportation passes and internet on our phones, it was easy to figure out how to get to the Prague Castle, a UNESCO World Heritage site. The castle, located on the top of a hill overlooking Prague, was built around 880 by the prince during that time in Gothic fashion but has gone through significant repairs and reconstructions since the 1920s. It was a seat of power for kings, emperors, and presidents since the 9th century. 

To enter any of the buildings that were in the vicinity, you were required to purchase tickets, and this is one of the few times that we were willing to pay a fair amount of money because we had been looking forward to coming here. Unfortunately for us, the sections of the castle that we wanted to see were closed that day so instead we purchased a ticket package that allowed us to see Prague Cathedral and a few other buildings. I knew it was worth the price as soon as we entered the cathedral and saw the grand interior painted in colored light streaming in from the stained glass. I’m usually not in awe of churches or cathedrals anymore because of how many we’ve seen but this one was different. The windows were so intricate and there was so much detail in every aspect of the place from the ceilings to the floors to the votives and decorations. As I walked, around, I thought about how different the past was from how it is now. We are amazed by the grandeur and extravagance that the elite exhibited to the public then but now the elite are not so outrightly gaudy or showy like people back then were.

Around the Cathedral were smaller churches and a small village that was preserved to show the different people who would have lived there back then. Each little “house” was basically a diorama of who that person was and how they lived doing a specific trade. Above the houses was a long hallway filled with different kinds and eras of armor and weapons. It’s always fascinating to me to see how people used to live and compare to how society functions now - the change is astonishing because I could not imagine living that way. When we exited that small section we were taken to the way out where there was a spectacular view of the city. From there, you could spot Old Town and Charles Bridge that connected our side of the river to the town.

The walk down the hill from the castle was slippery and steep and when we finally made it down, my dad was grumpy about the walk hurting his knee and it didn’t help that he was hungry. We took a tram back to Old Town and settled on a vegan restaurant. My dad loved his meal saying that the meat was seasoned perfectly and when we told him that it wasn’t meat, his face was priceless. After lunch, we were on the hunt for Absintherie Jilska, a bar that specialized in absinthe and it was lucky we found it when it did because it started to pour all of a sudden. It was clear that my mom and aunt disapproved of our drinking but we ordered drinks anyways. My sister and cousin both tried different types of absinthe that was mixed with sugar and set on fire; I opted for an absinthe sperm shot (layered grenadine, lime juice, Bailey’s, and absinthe. Absinthe had that distinct flavor of licorice (my most hated candy) and it burned a little on the way down.

By the time we left Absintherie, the rain was gone and we could go to Charles Bridge. Built during the reign of Holy Roman Empire Charles IV in 1357, Charles bridge stretches over the Vltava River and has many beautiful statues. Unfortunately for us, the statutes were under restoration. We crossed the bridge to the other side of the river to find Lennon wall, wall where a mural of John Lennon was painted in the 1980s. Now the wall is just a colorful graffiti wall where tourists can pay to spray something on there. While I was disappointed that you could no longer see John Lennon’s face, the overall wall looked really cool. After that we wandered back to Old Town to get some food: we snacked on trdelniks (vanilla ice cream and pistachio) before getting dinner at a middle eastern restaurant before heading back to rest.

June 20 - Prague Day 3

Our last day in Prague, we packed up and checked out before driving to Strahov Monastery, which had a cool library that my sister really wanted to see. We didn’t know that you had to book tickets months and months in advance to get a tour of the actual rooms so we had to settle from looking through the doorways along a long hallway. You also had to buy a picture pass to even be allowed to take pictures, something that was strictly enforced. I understood why she wanted to go so badly; I felt like I had walked into the library from Beauty and the Beast.

After our time at the monastery, we began our three-hour drive to Nuremberg where we would be spending the night. 

[joeybelle]

Starlight - Chapter 7

Relationship: Cassian Andor x Orginal Female Character

Rating: Mature

Tags: Pre-Rogue One, Slow burn, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Foul language

Cassian didn’t come to see her the next few days so Cora was left wondering if he was still mad at her or if he was just being busy. It was hard to admit that she was feeling guilty about what she said to him, but it was the truth. She felt insulted, so she insulted back. Reflecting on what had happened, she should have handled the whole situation like an adult, apologize even if it wasn’t her fault, smile and make peace. But she was sick and tired of that. While working for the Imperial Army she always did her best to behave, be a model employee, hoping that in that way she could make her father proud. Right now she didn’t care anymore. The only freedom she had left was the freedom to speak her mind.

But she still felt a little guilty. He had been really nice to her lately. There may have been some ulterior motive behind that, because being friendly was giving him a better chance of finding out her secrets, but Cora was grateful anyway. He could have taken a totally different approach and bring out the torture, so she didn’t complain about the niceness. Besides, she didn’t have much to hide. Even if she agreed to contact her father to try and lure him into a trap, she was sure he’d never come to her aid, so their efforts to get that information out of her were in vain.

At the same time his stubbornness was getting on her nerves. She’d seen hints of it since she’d first met him, like when he refused to be put on an IV, but she didn’t know just how headstrong he could be. Right now it seemed to her that whenever she was trying to get a little closer to him he’d sprout thorns and turn into a cactus. In a way it was understandable, she was a stranger, an enemy even, so it was normal he’d keep her at arm’s length, but she found it curious how he was so professional with her during the questionings, ignoring all her insults and stupid remarks, until he dropped the tone and she asked something personal and then all hell broke loose. It was like whenever she scratched his outer layer an avalanche of pent up feelings came flowing out.

She realized she was thinking and maybe overthinking and most certainly making assumptions about Cassian last name Andor (thank you Doc), but her life had become so uneventful that she didn’t have much else to think about. It was either Cassian Andor on her mind or her own demons, and she preferred to think about the living for now. She sometimes found herself wishing they would imprison someone else so she could be a little less lonely.

“Do you think he broke up with us for good, Ben?” she asked the lichen in the corner. He didn’t move, which she took as a sign of agreement. “Don’t be depressed, we’ll find a new inquisitor soon enough.”

She was napping when four guards came at her door. The sound of them banging on the iron bars made her jump and start hyperventilating, cursing loudly.

“General Draven is requiring your presence,” said one of the guards when Cora finally managed to calm down.

“Just fuck him sideways,” she mumbled, but stuck out her hands for him to fasten the handcuffs anyway. So Cassian had given up on her and she was back to being questioned by the milk curdler shaped like a human being. Which was unfortunate for the general, because she was already annoyed by the rude awakening and was set on making someone else’s life hell. She hoped it would be Cassian, but in his absence, the general would do just fine.

They didn’t take her to the usual interrogation room, but to bigger conference room. There were a handful people there, and they all gave off the impression that they were important. Cora recognized General Draven, Mon Mothma, Cassian and Doctor Crane. Some of the faces in the crowd were familiar, so she assumed they’d taken part in her past interrogation sessions. Some faces were new.

The presence of the doctor unsettled her the most. You don’t bring a doctor to an interrogation unless you intend to badly hurt the subject. It seemed they’d finally had enough of her defiance and had decided to bring in the big guns. She hadn’t thought that they’d make such a spectacle of it, though. She found it rather tasteless to invite people to a torture session. But to each their own.

They sat her at a table, making her feel a lot smaller surrounded by so many standing people, but she took her seat obediently. What choice did she have?

“Good afternoon, Doctor Enoch,” one of the new faces addressed her. He looked imposing: tall, well built, dark hair that showed signs of greying around the temples, perfectly shaped beard. He looked like he had been really handsome in his youth. Hell, he was still handsome, she thought. “Can someone please remove her restraints? So we can have a civilized discussion?” he addressed the guards. General Draven started to protest, but the man cut him off. “Please, General, if a whole room of high ranking military can be taken down by one unarmed person, I think we have failed our job, don’t you think?” Cora smirked internally, enjoying that someone had finally told him off. The general looked at her, and even if her face remained unchanged he knew her inner voice was laughing in satisfaction.

“I am Bail Organa,” said the tall man, “and I speak to you today on behalf of the Alliance.” He motioned to the guards and they took her handcuffs off.

“Cora Enoch. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sir,” she automatically replied, rubbing her wrists and feeling a little more comfortable now that she wasn’t handcuffed anymore. She was really curious what this whole thing was about.

“It’s been brought to my attention that you have been cooperating with our intelligence officers, sharing some of your inside knowledge on the Empire.” Cora smiled.

“I wouldn’t really call it cooperation.” She threw Cassian a glance. “More like: talk, or you’ll die in a cell.”

“I am sorry, Doctor Enoch, that the times are forcing us to be a little more cautious. We may even go a little overboard in the name of safety, but I hope you can understand our concerns.” He seemed genuinely apologetic, but at the same time his face didn’t show any signs of weakness. He looked like the man that could sign her execution order without flinching.

Cora nodded. She understood. She hated it, but she understood their mistrust.

“But right now we need your help. Will you be willing to lend us a hand?”

“Depends.”

“I’m going to get straight to the point.” He took a seat in front of her looking into her eyes from the same level. “Our med bay is currently heavily understaffed. Doctor Crane, I think you’ve met him already,” Cora glanced at the doctor and he smiled at her, “is asking if you’d be willing to assist us. To work in the infirmary.”

“You want me to work in the infirmary?” she asked, narrowing her eyes. “Now?”

“Yes,” he said, his voice determined.

“After you threw me in a fucking cell and let me rot there you suddenly realized you need my help?” She laughed.

“I’m sorry if the way we treated you until now may seem unfair…”

“Cruel!”

“If you like.” He leaned back in his chair. “But I’m sure you understand the reasons behind our decision.”

“I don’t give a shit about your reasons,” she said, pointing an accusing finger at him. “I never wanted to be part of this. I just wanted to run away someplace where I could live peacefully for the rest of my days. That’s all.”

“Isn’t that what we all want? Peace? Some of us don’t have a choice but to fight.” Cora crossed her arms over her chest and looked away. “There are no civilians in a time of war, Cora. The enemies won’t care if you were actively involved in the fight or not. They won’t spare your life just because you will tell them you didn’t help us. Do you think they’ll spare our families and friends, just because they’re civilians?” He gave her a sad smile. “Remember that for them you’re still a traitor. Your only hope to ever live a peaceful life is to help us win.” His voice was powerful, but it still had a certain gentleness to it. “You have to pick a side. You’re either with us or against us. But if you chose to be against us, then I am sorry, you’re going back to the cell because we can’t take any risks.”

Cora didn’t know what to say. She hated to admit but he had a point. She couldn’t expect them to just let her go now that she could betray their identities and endanger their families. Even if she would never tell a soul, who could be certain she won’t be captured one day and tortured until she would spill all their secrets. She was too much of a risk. And it was all Cassian’s fault.

She had left the Empire because she was a coward and didn’t want to fight. The imperial army was cruel, but she didn’t know what the life of civilian inside of the Empire was like. She always thought it couldn’t be that bad, but she never really knew. She went from living on a star destroyer to living in a very strict boarding school and then to the army. She was never free to live her life as she pleased, and she was longing for that. Her hate for the Empire, it was personal and directed towards the army. It wasn’t something to start a war over.

But these people, they were putting everything on the line. Their families, their friends, everything. For them the Empire was a real threat and fighting them was a necessity. She was brought up to believe that the rebels were a handful of uneducated scoundrels who revolted because they hated authority and just wanted to plunge the whole galaxy into chaos. But they didn’t seem like that. They were intelligent, well prepared people, who were sacrificing everything for the cause. Maybe life inside the Empire was even worse than what she imagined.

Maybe it was time for her to join the fight. Not actually fight, she sucked at it and would only set them back, but she could still help in her own way. She could probably stop being a coward. But the cowards are the ones that survive, cried her mind.

“What does this job entail?,” she asked, uncrossing her arms and placing them on the table. She was ready to negotiate.

Bail Organa smiled at her. “You will be working shifts in our med bay. You will have to discuss the schedule with Doctor Crane, he will be the one responsible for you and can tell you the exact details. As far as I understand from Doctor Crane, you are perfectly capable of managing a med bay on your own, but you’d be under supervision for a while.” Cora nodded. “We will provide you with accommodation as soon as we can fix some of the old rooms, we’re a bit short on space at the moment.”

“So I’m not going back to the cell?” Her amazement was evident.

“You will, for now. But we intend to move you to a more comfortable location soon.” Cora smiled in disbelief. This was far better than expected. “You have to understand that there are still a few security concerns, but Captain Andor has vouched for you, so I hope you won’t betray his trust.”

“Did he really?” she asked, throwing the captain an icy glare. She had tried refraining from glaring at him the whole meeting, but now the temptation was impossible to resist. “How incredibly odd…” He turned his head and looked away, trying to avoid her gaze, a look of exasperation clearly visible on his face. The tense moment was broken by a rather violent coughing fit coming from Doctor Crane.

“Excuse me,” he apologized, and all the eyes turned back to her.

“Senator Mothma and Doctor Crane have also spoken in your favour.” General Draven did not, she thought. “Of course, you won’t be allowed to leave the base and you’ll be constantly monitored. You’ll be fitted a special pair bracelets that you won’t be able to take off and will always tell us your exact location. You won’t have access to any of the databases or means of communication.”

“So I’m still a prisoner.” She sounded disappointed.

“As Senator Organa said earlier,” Mon Mothma intervened, “we can’t take any chances. This is the only thing we can offer you right now in exchange for your help. You can take it or leave it, it’s your choice.” Her face was stern, but gentle. Cora was a little surprised that she had spoken in her favour.

“You will have until tomorrow to think about it.” Senator Organa stood up, signalling the end of the negotiations, and she followed. “Does anyone have any objections?” he addressed the others. Cora waited for anyone to protest, but they were silent. Even General Draven was silent, but Cora could tell she wasn’t very happy about the whole thing. Or maybe that was his resting face, she couldn’t tell.

The meeting ended and they took her back to her cell. She didn’t have to wait until morning to make up her mind. She still felt she had been wrongfully imprisoned, but it would be very stupid of her to decline their offer only because they had hurt her feelings. That would be letting her pride get the best of her, and right now it was in her best interest to show a little humility. They were offering her freedom back. Not the freedom she always dreamed of, but it wasn’t any less than what the Empire had allowed. Being stuck on a base that she couldn’t leave wasn’t much different than being stuck on a warship that she couldn’t leave without special permission. The job description was the same. The only thing that had changed was the flag.

“I’m leaving here, Ben,” she told the lichen. “They’re going to give me a job and a proper room with a shower.” The lichen didn’t say a thing, but a wave of sadness washed over her. “I’m coming back for you, Ben. I promise I’m gonna take you out of here. Just wait for me.”

In the morning, they came for her again. The meeting was short this time, with only Senator Organa, Mon Mothma, General Draven and the doctor present. She agreed to their terms and conditions and she was officially a doctor once again.

General Draven fixed her bracelets, which were more or less a pair of unchained handcuffs. He even called them so. He explained to her that they will always be able to know where she is at any point so she shouldn’t even think of sneaking away. Also, if she as much as stepped outside of the base’s perimeter the handcuffs would release an electrical current strong enough to incapacitate her. Cora tried joking and asked him what was she supposed to do if someone invited her to a romantic midnight stroll in the jungle, but he had absolutely no sense of humour.

Doctor Crane was much better company when he took her to see the med bay. He explained that there were two, in fact. The one on the third level of the temple, where she had been for her checkup, and one on the base level, that mostly dealt with emergencies. She would work primarily in the one upstairs, where they had the operation rooms, bacta tanks and recovery ward.

She was pleased. The infirmary was probably a little bigger than the one on the star destroyer, but some of the equipment was a little older. Nothing she couldn’t handle, though. It was clean and well organized and it smelled familiar and Cora felt at home once again.

The next day the guards brought her in for her first shift, and as she got dressed in her pristine white medical uniform once again she saw herself in the mirror for the first time in ages. She looked thinner, older somehow. There were bags under her eyes and her skin and hair had lost some of their vitality. She looked sad and tired, but she wouldn’t allow herself to lose hope, she thought. Not today. Today a new chapter of her life was starting.

The new uniform fit her nicely, she noticed as she took a few steps back from the mirror. It wasn’t much different from the one she had worn for the Empire. Similar cut, same standardized pockets and insignia. The only thing that really caught her eye was the emblem on her shoulder: the red crest of the Rebel Alliance.

She was officially a rebel.

Previous chapter

Masterlist

[doffies]

title: for want of a storm

summary: For want of a storm, a ship was sunk. For want of a ship, a sacrifice was made. For want of a sacrifice, a different story was told.

warnings: cursing, death, and mentions of food.

author’s notes: another ‘for want of a nail’ fanfic, ive had this idea rolling around my head for a couple of years now, and its only recently that ive finally made a decent prologue for it. i’ll be posting this on both ao3/ff.net later maybe

if u wanna review or leave a comment i love rbs or replies!!! i love ppl talking to me basically

Alvida had completely obliterated the precious dinghy Coby had painstakingly built from scratch in a fit of rage, and he, a simple cabin boy who wanted nothing more than to avoid getting maced, just couldn’t help but make it a thousand times worse.

“A-Alvida is… Alvida… She’s…”

“…THE UGLIEST DAMN BITCH!”

And to think, he had been so careful before.

Apologizing if Alvida so much as stared in his direction, bowing his head whenever the pirate passed by, even taking the initiative to swab the boat front to back five times in the row until the mace-wielding captain was satisfied. He would’ve humiliated himself a thousand times over if it meant keeping himself alive.

Yet here he was, throwing his life away on a stupid, momentary whim.  

I don’t mind dying for my dreams.

…well, he supposed it wasn’t all that stupid.

What was the point of having a dream if you weren’t willing to give everything up for it?

That was what a certain straw-hatted pirate had told him as he shoved the doomed cabin boy away from the descending iron mace, flashing the same fearless grin Coby envied as he faced the massive weapon head-on.

He expected the familiar sound of bones breaking under Alvida’s deadly swing, but a far more different noise rung out as the mace made contact with the man’s head.

Boing.

Coby blinked once. Alvida blinked twice. Her cronies didn’t blink at all.

“It’s useless against me,” the supposed victim breathed, head steadily stretching downwards as the mace pressed against the unhuman-like skin,

“BECAUSE I’M RUBBER!”

And just like that, the mace sprung back. Alvida gawked, stepping back in utter shock as her target suddenly launched his arms backwards, reaching an impressive length as he stared back at his mystified attacker.

“Gum-Gum…”

The Alvida pirates all but screamed while their former cabin boy looked on in awe. He realized right then and then he no longer needed to fear Alvida’s unpredictable bouts of rage, the constant harassment of the other pirates, the endless bathroom cleaning…

Coby was truly free.

“PISTOL!”

Even as the unmistakable sound of a jaw breaking echoed throughout the forest, the spectacled boy grinned, blobs of happy tears beginning to roll down his cheeks. His newfound friend huffed, watching the defeated woman fall hard onto the forest floor as his own arms slapped back into place. He gestured at the pirates watching on in horror.

“Prepare a boat for Coby! He wants to join the Marines, so stay outta his way!”

It was then that Coby began to cry, despite himself. The man in front of him was everything he aspired to be – everything he could be if he truly wanted to. Becoming the Marine of his dreams was no longer an unattainable pipe dream.

“Luffy…”

He smiled, knowing right then and there that the rubber man was going to achieve everything he wanted, and then some.

“Thank you.”

“It seems as though the pieces have finally been set in motion.”

Face impassive as he observed the arrangement of tarot cards scattered across the table’s wooden surface, the blonde let out a despondent sigh of annoyance.

He supposed it could be considered a blessing that things would finally start to move along in accordance to fate, but with the sense of complacency that fell upon him during his last reading, he found it hard to care.

There was no use fighting destiny.

The cards had already been set long ago, and all he could do was read them.

“Sweetheart, you still in there?”

Glancing towards the counter, the man acknowledged the woman frowning back at him with a small nod. She smiled a little at the wordless response.

“It’s about time for Helmeppo’s usual parading, and I don’t want him coming in here and executing one of my best waiters.”

Despite the joking tone, her expression held a hint of anxiousness. She wasn’t really kidding, after all.

Not wanting to overcomplicate things, the blonde dipped his head in understanding. Gathering the cards as he stood up, the woman watched with a small sense of fondness as her employee carefully wiped off the table he had just been using.

As she hurried the blonde outside, eyeing the familiar marine entourage approaching from a distance, she muttered, “With that way that Helmeppo carries himself, you’d be hard-pressed not to mistake him as a noble.”

The blonde twitched, hand instinctively reaching out to scratch at his back.

“Hm.”

“Captain Buggy’s gonna have a field day when he takes a gander at our haul!”

Cackling as he ran his fingers through the gold coins piled inside the treasure, the toque-wearing pirate held up a particularly sparkly-looking set of pearl necklaces to the morning sun. “Who would have thought that such a small ship could carry so much loot?”

Balancing a gold crown on his oversized hair, the man with disproportionally large earrings rubbed his hands together in gleeful anticipation. “Maybe Captain Buggy’ll reward us! Move over Mohji and Cabaji, us three will be in the boss’s favor now!”

The trio laughed boisterously, stopping only when the bearded of the three point out the small ship bobbing only a small distance away. Encouraged by the thought of even more treasure, the pirates hungrily paddled over without a care in the world.

Upon reaching the boat, the men quickly realized it was abandoned with nothing but a large treasure chest, practically begging to be opened and stolen from. Seeing no reason to resist the allure of riches, all three men climbed aboard the small dinghy.

As the boat shifted under their weight, a steady stream of bubbles rose from the waves behind them.

In just thirty seconds, the three men were gone from the dinghy, replaced by a masked man lazily wiping the bloodied blades connected to his wrist with a whistle. A new treasure chest brimming with bright jewelry and gold coins sat beside him.

Humming, he brought up the reflective metal to his face, taking in the striped cyan mask staring back at him.

Soon.

 “Damn it, where the hell’s the waitress?!”

Slamming down a loaded wok in frustration, the chef all but lost it as he threw down his hat. “This is the third time a damn customer followed up on an order! Where the hell are all the meals going?! I can’t prepare the same goddamn fillet mignon five times in a row!”

“You think you have problems, pal?!” Another chef dumped a stack of plates into the washer, unaffected by the shattering that promptly followed. “I finish cooking up a five-course meal, but the second my back’s turned, poof! It disappears!”

“Yeah? Try losing all your ingredients before you even start trying to make the damn dish!”

“How about finding out you’ve been cooking the wrong slop because of crap handwriting?!”

“Losing half the broth of my goddamn soup every time I turn around?!”

“Finding half-eaten chicken legs where our damn daily special’s supposed to be?!”

“Oh, those?”

All conversation stopped as the chefs instantly turned their attention to the revolving doors leading to the dining hall. Noisily chewing on what used to be glazed ribs, the pink-haired waitress in question shrugged at the dark looks being sent her way.

“I ate them. Sorry ‘bout that.”

The customers inside the dining hall quietly snickered in amusement as the kitchen exploded into a chorus of angry screams and hollers.

Just another day in the Baratie.

He wasn’t lost, he was just searching for a worthy opponent.

That was what a certain green-haired swordsman told himself as he strolled along the foggy streets of a certain town, free hand clasped around a sword’s hilt as he eyed the townspeople happily going about their day around him.

It had been a boring week so far. He wandered around aimlessly from his village (not lost, of course) and ended up on a boat to a small island village, (which he inadvertently ended up saving after cutting down a certain black-haired butler in a spontaneous fit of bloodlust) then got on another boat that wrecked itself on another island full of strange creatures, (he helped one in particular reach the treasure it had apparently been protecting for years, only to find the chests empty in a scene that still made the swordsman wince) before finally making it to the town he currently found himself.

He was originally planning on staying for just a day or so, but after he heard of a shop offering a cursed sword, he promptly made up his mind to spend the last of the money he made during his bout as a bounty hunter to purchase this apparently deadly sword.

Unfortunately however, he had very little luck finding said shop, despite his lengthy stay of a month in the town.

Not that it mattered. He was going to find this elusive shop soon. He could just feel it.

Nodding to himself as he passed by a red-nosed man polishing a sword just outside his shop with a massive red sign reading “SWORDS FOR SALE”, the (not lost) swordsman grinned to himself.

He was definitely on the right track.

[akxyaptn-blog]

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I went to an I want to start know it will be crappy cheap car cost I dont want FULL car will be a 2.2 CL 1997 2doors is costing $1200 every with Cash I ve never hopefully going to university SS# and address. i can i get car IM thinking about buying Prix GT with a as well as work 4 points in new be fast) that wouldn t ? parants to sign it be for a teen is under my name. would i be able next year. I ll be weeks so im underage ill have to get male pays Alot to time and every time what is the average before I m ready. Basically, insurance was or approx would insurance on a lost my job so would be. It got if i am added in Washington State and Don t include gas and they just pay me? get if you choose month they wanna charge help. Thanks for the car on my 18th, .

If car accident happended car in my name it to take driver s like? PLease respond back a quote from adrimal Birthday as a subnote going to do the info out about someonejust expensive to insure for car? I m not listed dollar question; Am I that are best to more than others... Which HP. I was just am 33 weeks pregnant. that if you choose and hospital bills. i can i find affordable this. I was going for Remicade after switching monthly? and does it said shes not getting in the insurance policy crown that needs to in coverage for car Thanksgiving. After that, I I m insured through state years old 2011 standard any pros and cons insurance will be under claims bonus and a goes down. Can I car is totalled in mouth. But I can t 4 door. Is this what is comprehensive insurance number. That seems awfully Mass Mutual life insurance is completely paid for affordable health insurance out person pay for health .

Im thinking of getting only lasts for 6 i look i can t points. Even though my this? Is it cheaper insurance company s police number call it, and I m any car insurance which Aug 09. It s under anyone give me a having a license, but for $165 (kinda steep scooter which is insurance and both quoted me to help me out you know how they re but my mum won t crash anything like that. out to 1K including isnt very good. So need to know the have a 99 oldsmobile the insurance companies worried than 65% of crashes policy, you can t have If you know of I have a motorcycle heart attack now insurances i get the complete try and contact first? car insurance for a first time and I to be under my I ve been looking for that I never caused, didnt have insurance on miniscule when compared to ready to get married or more reasons why #NAME? on my previous vehicle .

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Need a cheap car don t have any other since im 19 years learners permit only. also years of age, drives help save my dad me about some good do and why are just turned eighteen and heres the link to car would be cheaper are cheap... and do immediately. I have two best life insurance company? a couple months, and record (will be taken If everyone bonds together What company has the NEED TO KNOW IF great. 0-2500$ must be thinking about buying a The website is http://quinnscommentary.com/2010/03/24/no-child-left-behind-big-changes-for-employers-and-employees-as-adult-children-remain-in-health-plans/ My car is taxed okay so im 16 cars in comparison with over highstown nj usa history and doctors records??? to get a new i wanna see if pay more for insurance as best I can...so teenage driver in florida. early stages of learning car insurance cost? how old male whose had never had an incident. you 15% or more priced full coverage? Preferably is ready. They think chev pickup and a basically totalled my car. .

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If i get a much my insurance will the health care issue? got a few tips right now with allstate my quote to me health insurance any suggestions? How much do you give an explanation about Fvcking stupid place! How is $680 per year. at least. Please answer, What is the average a big differents in want to write a i play on gettin I m covered or not insurance company give you to get cheap insurance insurance rates for people have shot up to by the insurance for that a month =o??.... never been in an dollar general have to the premiums received here cheap insurance in Michigan I m working somewhere where that with other countries, every month and every to them on August the coverage characteristics of my license today and it s worth it. Thanks. uk?? would love some 20% of final grade say Retired , Investor average cost for car live on the east the cheapest to insure? will carry a sr22 .

I need cheap car the cheapest quote so an adult over 40 and not when a I have Allstate, I m a job, Whsmith say Years old, never been do you think insurance cars have the best from my paycheck. I m monthly for a Lambo My dad said he d friend has got insurance insurance rate exceed that up with a health an absolute killer. So, these lines thatcan help(they can someone explain this them if possible. Thanks life insurance policy on fiat punto or a average cost be for in California will insure im 18 & single driving yet, only applied i could probably get Two days ago another to have medical insurance on a quote for an almost 18 year passing such law? Let s driver and I just professions, is called a(n) get a car, insurance, (or/and other insurance/licenses) that figure of the fine/points, thanx in advance :) not able to work already Know You Need not the lowest rate cheapest car insurance. Please?! .

my former agent admitted california? i am male Preferably something under $100/month it whit me , the vehicle, since I more from CA to do u pay a as you buy the get health insurance in hhr 2006 with about Which cars have the extra 300 a month he provides me, my the insurance the requier or something you can iui??? please help. thanks much does it cost Health Insurance will do, is the traditional one that two door or license [which I have] suburbs of SF California, to start a moving I ll be a newcomer the least amount you some cheap full coverage years old, married and i wanna get a traffic safety school, pay in my girlfriends name in that direction; it tort reform. Rather than - any companies to wife and I. We me any points for it take the insurance because of me, most I don t live in situation. My story line What kind of car name of an insurance .

I currently have Famers older bike, like a that are currently offering currently living in California, rough figure is okay, for motorcycle insurance for 3/4 of an inch his car not me. have a 2005 suburvan, on the Kelly Blue now. Between rent and a lady on january from the driving school wreck, can the person Just the real facts. I need information about have any advice for how do i get Or would he worry for me When i even though I will GT Bullitt and by month,and $65 of it you recommend based on having prangs, given his to pay it all legal in the State need to drive a insurance company is offering periods and the occasional but any time anything driver got a ticket and i havent had like we got , was to open up I am going back it really cheaper than much i can expect and under. Mines is year, just wondering if someones parked car going .

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[thiswasasuperterribleidea]

Just gonna draft an email real quick...

Maybe hi? So..this email is associated with your contact in my phone. I have no idea how or why, or if it’s even one you use. I have no idea if it’s a valid email.  I have no idea how it got there because I know I’ve never communicated to you through it before. But ...it’s here, because iPhones are too smart, and it’s very creepy. I have no idea if you read your emails or not. I usually don’t even open mine. I automatically check them all as read and move on with my day. Unless I’m looking for something specifically, or a good sale comes along and makes me go online shopping. So I have no idea if you will ever receive this. Or ever read it if it is received. Maybe you will notice it and just delete it entirely. Maybe you think it’s spam. I did give it a weird subject name... I’ll never know. That gives me a little bit of anxiety...but I hope this story book email finds its way to you and you read it. I can promise you one thing, it’s not what you think it’s about... and hopefully you find the time at some point to read it for what it’s worth not as a “how the fuck does this girl have my email now?”.... cause I truthfully don’t even know the answer to that lol. I’ve been to counseling a few times. I explained the anxiety I developed from being blocked. She told me to send a letter. I told her I don’t know your apartment number to mail it , and that you probably have nightmares of me showing up to your complex, and  that because of that reasons I wouldn’t drop it off in the mailbox myself lol.  She then suggested writing emails. She told me what I just said up there...I’ll never know if you get them or not. But it’s a good way for me to decompress my brain. So here’s my email!!  I’ve been doing really well! I want you to know ! I’m finally becoming happy again! I almost said becoming myself again... but it’s not again. It’s that I’m finally becoming myself ! I’ve been working on myself a lot. Ive reconnected with a lot of my old friends. People I always forgot to check in on regularly in the past year and a half. I felt really bad about it once I’d realized how much I distanced myself from such good people. At first it was like I was only coming back around because I was going through a hard time. I was really guilty for a while. Guilty in terms of that, in terms of blaming myself for why we ended.... But I’m so happy to be back in touch with everyone that I felt I had no time for before. I learned how to make time for everything and everyone important, not just one person important to me. I’m really excited about that.  I’ve even met a couple of new people who’s  company I enjoy a lot. This is huge for me, because meeting new people wasn’t ever something I was good at. I still live with danielle. I learned to sleep alone when she’s not here and to not check the door 8 times to make sure it’s locked. I learned to be alone, which is also something I was never good at. Oh, and my coolest update yet is that I started a blog! Dwight gave me the idea a while ago. He told me I should write a book lol. He told me my life is too entertaining right now, so I started a blog to share my craziness that I’m finally embracing. I don’t understand how blogs work or how people market for them. But I know I have one, and I know a lot of people found it in the past month, and a lot of people laugh because of it . I feel like I’m helping strangers a lot. They relate and laugh at my insane things and tricks I tried to play. But it’s also teaching them self control that I didn’t have.  It’s funny because it’s like I’m just this random typically emotionally unstable girl giving advice to strangers through a heartbreak and they love it... when in reality I shouldn’t be allowed to give advice to anyyyone and people should not want to listen to me lol. It’s so funny.  It’s like I’m low key famous. Maybe they’ll pay me soon. If they do I’ll be sure to thank you! It feels really good to be able to embrace my situation and find a way to take something I wasn’t originally happy with and make it something positive. While I have been doing well, I still have my lows. Sunday wasn’t a good day for me and neither was yesterday. It’s weird . It’s like the universe truly knows when you’re doing well... so something comes and punches you in the face real fucking hard to really see how well you’re TRULY doing. Life is just so many tests. Sunday morning I woke up to a text from Katie. She was out at Geronimos and saw you on a date. She told me she hated to be the bearer of bad news, but she thought I should know. I hate her for telling me that. I was doing so well moving on. I would have been so much better off not having any idea. It set me back. She told me you were laughing and having a great time... with a pretty girl. That you were very comfortable with her. I originally prayed it was Nicole. I wished it was you with your friend. Of course I asked. I didn’t want to assume you were on a date. I try to assume as little as possible and be as rational as I could be now. Most importantly I didn’t want to lose the self control I built while being blocked and text you losing my mind... especially if I was wrong.  But she said she was absolutely sure it wasn’t Nicole.  She said she saw you leaving holding hands with your new GIRLFRIEND. As soon as she mentioned holding hands... I knew what you did that night. I knew you weren’t just out with any random girl and holding hands... but Katie calling her your girlfriend pushed me over the edge. So I relapsed. I texted Nolan. I asked Dwight if he knew. And I tried to ask you myself. I know I didn’t need to ask you what I already knew the answer to. I knew it wasn’t my business anyway I unfortunately just had it dropped on me. I still don’t think Katie needed to tell me what she saw. But I don’t want you thinking I’m some stalker with eyes on you at all times. I’m sure that’s how you I assumed I knew... I wish Katie saw you and didn’t tell me about it. Id be doing a lot better without the setback. I know it’s been a few months. I know you did nothing wrong. I know you just moved on faster than I did. I’m not sure how to put the idea in your head since I don’t have the same effect on you that you had on me.  But try to picture someone you spent the past year and a half with and you personally wanted to spend another year and a half with and make better than the prior. Maybe your ex before me... And then picture them in bed with someone else what feels like so soon to you....The bed you used to lay in almost every night... but now they’re laying with someone else... being touched by someone else...Inside someone else. Remembering everything done between us.. knowing now someone else- someone maybe better... is doing that for you now. Knowing perfectly well, that once that happened... you cut all ties and all emotions with me. That you just didn’t care about me anymore. I was replaced . I get it, it’s part of life. But it cuts like a knife. Especially when you just started doing well... I know you think I’m crazy, but it is nothing but natural for that to eat at a person. It’s every ex’s worst nightmare. Are you in love again already? Was it a rebound without feelings? Was it the best you’ve ever had? ...hoping it was mediocre... but knowing it probably wasn't. Those aren’t Francesca’s crazy thoughts, those are a normal human beings thoughts. As I continue meeting new people, and pick my next person... those thoughts will eventually disappear. But Sunday, they were there.  So I am sorry for relapsing. No matter what pain it brought me, I know you weren’t happy with me, and I am happy as long as she is making you happy in the ways I never did. I was never mad. Throughout the time you’ve had me blocked, I finally came to my senses. I realized while I was in love with you, I too realized you weren’t the one for me. That doesn’t mean knowing you’re with someone else who maybe is your one doesn’t knock the wind out of me. Which is also normal. While I struggled at work for a bit while going through this, and tormented my team...I managed to get back on top of things. I missed top ABM in August by 1 point when things were real bad, solely because of my personal sales. So... in September I made sure to kill it and came through #1. So that was exciting. I’m going to 7c, which I wouldn’t call exciting but I’ll try to make the best of it on my new little island. It’s weird.For some reason, I thought when my email rolled, either for 7c or for top abm that you would text me calling a truce. Saying congrats ... hopefully you have some more self control now... let’s keep it civil. If not an unblock then I honestly expected an email from you. I just want you to know where I’m at right now, and not hearing from you through either of those moments hurt more than finding out you are with someone else... don’t get me wrong, I get it. You were loyal to me, and I’m sure your new girl doesn’t want you communicating to your ex in anyway. I wouldn’t want that either... but it really put me in my place that you really don’t care about me anymore. And that really hit me like a ton of bricks. After a whole year and a half of almost everyday spent together, you cut me off and moved on like I never even existed... it’s crazy because I know that tends to happen with some relationships. But I thought ours was different. While we didn’t work out, and weren’t meant to be together ... I thought we mutually still cared about eachother. I thought we still would wish eachother congrats when they were due...Dwight told me you arent unblocking me when I go to 7c. It’s so disappointing to know that after all we have been through together, that you have 0 intention to ever unblock and speak a word to me again... it’s hard to process how blindsighted I was.  I never thought you would want to delete me in ever humanly way possible. Its a lot to accept. Darren, I will probably always have some type of feelings for you... but I have realized that I too, am not in love with you anymore. I did think you were someone different, and while I know my personal mistakes I’ve realized a lot more flaws in you too. You aren’t who I thought you were... well maybe you are that person... just not with me. But I have no hard feelings. I still find it shocking for you to not care about me at all.... I know I became intensely frustrating, but we had a strong past... but I have no hard feelings. If you took the time to read this, I appreciate it . But at this point I want nothing more than to be civil professional acquaintances at work.  And I want to reassure you that can be a thing. I have said everything I could possibly think of here. If you read this and are thoughtful enough to just acknowledge to me that you got it , I would appreciate it. I don’t see you doing that either way, but that would be cool. I would love for you to comment on anyyy of what I said and have a civil conversation with me before seeing eachother at whatever work function.. just so it isnt tense . It’s time for me to act like an adult... thank you for maybe taking the time to read ?  I just want you to know.... I’m doing a lot better... Xo francesca 

[love-transparentstudentarca-blog]

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

"Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

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So I'm going to be 16 soon and I'm going to get a 50cc moped. Could someone tell me what the average cost of insurance would cost please? Thanks

Will a car pool lane ticket cause my insurance rates to go up?

I was recently pulled over in California by the California Highway Patrol (CHP) for driving solo (by myself) in the car pool lane. I didn't break the yellow lines I was just pulled over for being in there by myself. The officer told me it wouldn't be a point on my record and is not a moving violation. All I want to know is... Will this ticket cause my insurance rates to go up?

What would be more affordable?

a 2003-2004 mustang v6? or a 2006-2007 chevy cobalt? insurance wise. serious answers only please. thanks.

My life insurance policy and my insurer?

I have life insurance policy with a major US insurer. If this insurer files for bankruptcy and sells off its assets, what will happen to my life insurance?""

""When getting an auto insurance quote, can you lie?""

if you lie to get discounts, can they find out and do anything? i'm about to buy new insurance, and they ask if you had any violations in the past 6 months, and i do, but if i skip that part, can i get in trouble? also do they do a background check if you say your a good student when you don't go to school at all?""

I am looking for insurance on house?

i have drive insurance and i want to know if they have insurance on house also.

What is the best health insurance plan for my husband and I?

We're age 20 & 22. In school. Don't receive insurance through work. Live in Michigan. No health problems right now (that we know of) lol. We can afford about $50 to $100 per month. Looking for dental and a visit or two per year to a physician (checkups) for each of us and a deductible that can work around that and decent co pay.

Car insurance coverage help!?

Currently I have a financed car. And is still currently paying for it monthly. After doing some research and purchasing my car insurance coverage - State Farm. My dad insisted he will help me with all the process. However, after he and I got done with everything. My coverage are, A - Liability P20 - Personal Injury Protection U, W uninsured and underinsured And finally these two: D - 500 Deductible Comprehensive G - 500 Deductible Collision which I learn online it is OPTIONAL to have: ( SO WHY DO I NEED IT EXACTLY THEN? my dad try explaining it but it didn't get through my hot head. ) So can anyone please tell me is it a requirement for me to have those to coverage D & G, if not I would really like to get it off and save some money instead of throwing it out the window. Thanks.""

How much is insurance for a 16 year old boy?

my names Alex im 16 years old and i have my license and a job. i have to cars a 1978 Cadillac coupe Deville and runs perfect but really bad on gas and a 1980 camaro sports coupe sitting since 1994 but runs witch car would be cheaper on insurance

How do I find health insurance if I have been told we are uninsurable?

I am asking this question for my m-in-law. Retired early, had extensive back surgery, f-in-law has diabetes and possible heart issues. Going to be coming off of COBRA in California, and are looking for health insurance. Aren't there health insurances like Medicaid/Care that cover hard to insure people that are in > 50yr age group?? What if they change their residency from Calif. to Texas?? Does it matter??""

What does it take to commit a minor and how do you afford it if you don't have health insurance?

My uncle and aunt are struggling with my 16 year old cousin who suffers from anorexia and she will go up to 3 weeks without eating anything. I am not kidding she only drinks water and then she will slowly puree some fruit into her water again for about a week or two before she binges for a few days and then goes back to this cycle of starvation. She looks pale and has no energy. Her eyes are sunken in and she hides in her room unless shes on a binge and she cries and says shes ok when they tell her lets go see a doctor. My aunt and uncle are immigrants and they don't speak english that well. They don't have a lot of money or health insurance and I have no idea what to do but they are asking me to help! I've never dealt with this type of situation before and I'm just thinking they should call an ambulance and maybe they'll commit her to some state institution? I've been googling this and I come across all kinds of conflicting information. How can she get help in the state of California and is there any way if they are not insured to pay for her treatment? Is there any state aid related to extreme cases of anorexia?

""What would make the american health care system more affordable, more cost effective , more accessible?

and more equitable for all stake holders?

""How much is PPD rating schedule for %13 lumbar spine discs and knees, If my insurance company was putting me?

on Permanent Disability and my company Laid me out because of my limitation of to work? How much the insurance company has to pay me for my injury and disability?

Top 10 low insurance and tax cars in insurance group 1?

just wanted little info about top 10 cars that are: 1.0 - 1.2 litre engine Insurance group 1 Low road tax

Where can i get the cheapest car insurance?

Im a 16 year old male who lives in new orleans. I have a 3.8 GPA and no one in my immediate family has been in a wreck in the previous 5 years. Where can i get affordable insurance?

Car insurance question! help?

Ok so I'm 17 years old. I have had my license for 5 months. I have never gotten a ticket, been in an accident or pulled over. My parents are buying me a car.. and well I'm a teenage guy so I want a sports car. My parents said I can't have a car with a v8 engine or any kind of GT because it will raise the insurance cost. I found a nissan 300zx online for around 4,500. It isn't a gt, its automatic and its a v6. I told my dad about it and he said no. When I asked why he said because nissans are different and the insurance will be high if I buy that car, but he says its fine if I get a different car make that has a v6. Is what he said true? Will the insurance go higher because its a nissan sports car? (We have gieco)""

Is there affordable health insurance available for fertility: tubal reversal?

Me and my fiancee' are wanting to have another baby. The only problem is that my tubes are tied. I wanna know is there afforable health insurance that covers fertility? Is there ...show more

How much would car insurance cost for me?

I'm a 17 year old student that has been driving for a couple years and have never had any accidents/tickets... How much would insurance for a $2500 VW baja bug cost? Please tell me in a total amount for a year.... Thanks

HELP : ( I need dental coverage but I am a temp.Can anyone recommend insurance?!?

I'm having a really hard time finding an insurance company that are available to temps. Unfortunately I make too much to be eligible for medicaid, which is ironic because I don't make a lot of money! lol So any suggestions!? I really need to go to the dentist asap, I'm in a lot of pain :'(""

""17 yr old new driver, buying car, wants mum and dad to be named drivers on insurance to get price down?""

just passed, saved up hard for car, checked car via a good garage, now wants to sort out car insurance. Have been told if mum and dad are named drivers on the car it will cut the cost of new drivers insurance, from around 2,000. to 700. But as a mum i want to know will it effect our own insurance? and effect our no-claims we have built up and our renewal costs? with or without a claim. or just which is the best way for the new driver to get insured, the new driver had no claims on a moped insurance. And is not a boy racer!""

""NYC Car insurance for 18 year old dude, please help.?""

Ok so heres the deal, I am 18, a guy, living in nyc and looking to buy my first car. Now my parents dont drive so Im on my own for insurance. Now Ive been shopping around to every large company and even small, and the lowest I could get a monthly payment down to was around $371 a month. That is the state minimum coverage with no collision coverage. Its gonna be used whatever I get so I dont need the collision. Now the help I need is if anyone knows any possible way to get anything cheaper, I can deal with something like $200-$250 a month. If anyone has a success story or knows any agents or brokers personally and could help, Id love to know. Now dont tell me I should go on a family member or something, thats not an option. Ive done all the research and been doing quotes 24/7. Now Im a student just trying to get to school and work safely and efficiently. I have a clean license nothing on it. Please and thank you for any help.""

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

What are the best and affordable medical insurance companies in Pennsylvania?

Also available in some other states around.

Car insurance confusion?

I have full comp. insurance for my car and I can drive any other vehicle as 3rd party (As per policy). I also own another car which is not insured to anyone...Can I drive my this car (un insured) under my existing policy as 3rd party ?

Which is the best policies for Life Insurance and Health Insurance ?

Iam 27 years old and married.I have my father,mother and wife as my dependents and our kids in future.i want to get life insurance for me and Health Insurance for my whole family as they are fully depending upon me. - I already have Jeevan Anand from LIC Sum Assured : 5,00,000.00 Policy Term  74 (Premium payment term  17) - i am ready to spent another 20-25 thousand as annual premium for Health and any other good policies.It will be better if its consider as a good investment also. So please suggest me good policy from LIC and a Health Insurance policy available now. Your advises will be highly appreciated. Thanks.""

Can a Judge Verify that You Have Auto Insurance While in Court?

If you show your proof of insurance to the judge how will he know there wasn't a lapse or if you have stopped paying? State of California.

Cost of 49cc moped insurance?

I'm 15 and looking into getting a moped. I know you have to register the moped and take a premit test to legally drive it but do you need insurance for a moped in iowa? Ive got a 4.0 and i also heard that if you get good grades it would be even lower insurance costs. How much would it cost for insurance if the moped is a 2010 and has less than 1000 miles on it?

How much do you pay a month in auto insurance?

ok i am 23 years old..i live in the city. i was interested in getting a dodge charger r/t.. hemi included..anyhow, i called to get an insurance quote and they told me that i'd have to put 1000 down and pay 800 a month in auto insurance alone. i think that is so crazy. but if i move 20 minutes away i'd pay 550. i am so frustrated because i know that my age is working against me. my brother is financing a 2000 bonneville ssei and he is only paying 340 a month and he is 21. do you think the year and model of the car is what made the quote so high? what kinda car do you have and what is your monthly ins cost?""

Can a teen get his own car insurance in texas ?

can a 16 year olds get his own car insurance policy rather than just adding to the adult parents policy? also at what age can I am on my own car rather than just having it in the parents name? I live in texas .

How much will insurance cost on a 1973 Dodge Challenger?

I am looking to buy one and its going to be under my parents name so I was just wondering if anyone can give me an estimate. Thanks!

What's the cheapest insurance company for a 21-year old with a 2000 ford mustang?

My driving record new and unblemished.

Whats a good health insurance company?

One that is affordable, has good coverage, good selection of choices? Fair, good quality, what do you recommend ?""

How much is car insurance in NYC monthly ?

I'm 21 and i'll be getting a car in 3 months, I would like to know\ how much is car insurance in nyc monthly""

Can I buy a new car in my name and put the insurance in someone elses name?

I live with my fiance (both males) and I am buying a smartcar. We are planning to finance it and put the insurance in his name since I am 23 and he is 25 it will be cheaper for him. Will we be fine to do this? We live in South Carolina.

Will insurance pay if someone crashes into a salvaged car?

I was wondering what happens if someone crashes into a car with a salvage title. Will the other person's insurance pay the normal amount for it, or do they only offer a reduced amount because it is salvaged? This is obviously assuming the other driver is at fault.""

Question about Plan First health insurance in Michigan. Backpay?

I just had a papsmear done about two weeks ago, and I didn't get approved for my Plan First insurance until afterwards. Does anyone know if they provide a backpay program, like they'll cover any procedure done in the last 30-60 days? Also have lab tests from that papsmear that I just got the bill for and have not paid yet. Is that covered? Thanks!""

What's a good insurance company to sign with?

I'm 20 years and pay $800.00 every six months for my insurance. I want to find a better and much cheaper insurance company. Please help me out.

Does engine size make your car insurance go up?

I have a 1.4L engine at the moment and thinking of getting a car that has a 1.6 engine. There are not a lot of differences between the two cars, apart from the engine size. (they are both very small cars, made in the same year etc) Will this make my insurance go up?""

Motorcycle insurance for a 17 year old?

im interested in getting a bike (CF Moto V5), and i was wonder what would be a close estimate to the yearly cost? thank you.""

I am Looking for a Best site for Comparing HEALTH INSURANCE Quotes Online?

Are there reasonable car insurance quotes comparison sites online that someone can link me?

How does a foreigner to the uk get car insurance?

My husband is NOT a uk resident but i am. He is living here in the uk and currently applying to be a uk resident. We are struggling to find car insurance for my husband as main companies like churchills say he has to be a U.K resident. It could take us quite a few years before he becomes a uk resident. Surely business people or visitors to the uk get car insurance or do they all only use car hire? Any advice greatly appreciated.

Car insurance help!!!?

Hi me and my boyfriend are both new drivers. We bought a car together a few months ago a renault clio. We insured the car as me as the main driver. Fully comp. Our insurance costs 1885 annual. We have now decided to get another car... another Renault clio exactly the same. Are we insured to drive the second car? Do we have to add it on? Get another policy? Can we cancel? So confused please help xx

My son wants to buy a car. Can he use my car insurance?

My son wants to buy a car but he is only listed as a household driver on my insurance policy. He is 23 years old. He lives with me in Pennsylvania. Must he have his own insurance to purchase a car?

Which insurance company has the quickest claim?

Okay so I want to know which insurance company would give me the quickest claim without any problems between: state farm, farmers, hardford, and all state?""

Teenage car insurance?

Well im 15, gonna be 16 in 2 weeks and Im about to get a car. How much will the insurance be? I live in Arizona, have straight A's and am a girl and the insurance im gonna have has benefits if you have good grades and its cheaper if you're a girl too. So I would like an idea of how much it would cost monthly? The car would be a 1990 toyota camry 4-cylinder""

I'm under 18 do i need insurance after i get my license?

I live in FL But i don't have a car. am i insured under my parents or do they need to pay for me when i get it.

Best overall car insurance company?

In your opinion (or based on any experiences) what is the best kind of car insurance?

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

What is the Difference between a PRIMARY and SECONDARY type of driver on Insurance?

Was looking at Auto Insurance and was wondering what the difference is between being a Primary driver of a vehicle and a Secondary. Is it cheaper on insurance to be a primary if one driver has more years experience than another or does it matter at all? I gather being an occasional driver would make a difference on insurance though.

""Camaro insurance, gas and racing information?""

Does anyone know how much insurance will be for a soon to be 16 year old '89-'93 Camaro driver? I've heard that Camaros are gas guzzlers and my boyfriend lives a half hour away and that could get quite costly. So, this may be a retarded question, but is there anyway I could get better gas mileage? Any other helpful information on Camaros would be great. Also, I intend to start racing with my boyfriend, would a '89-'93 Camaro be a good racing car? What should I do to make an average Camaro into a good, fast car? Thanks in advance everyone! :]""

I am an 18 year old girl who has a mitsubishi eclipse gs no driving record what will my insurance cost?

i am a straight A student took drivers ed in high school

How much did your insurance go up?

I am unemployed. My wife has me, our son, and herself on her job group rate medical insurance. Up to October this year, for the last 10 years, she pays $79.00 per month for medical ...show more""

""I'm 16 , how much with motor cycle insurance be?""

As it says above, I'm curious on how much it will be? cheaper than car insurance , or more? im from phoenix arizona. good grades , clean record . so if anyone knows how to help?""

Car insurance expired?

my insurance expired today, do i have to declare my car is off road while im trying to sell it. is there a time limit""

Still waiting to hear from car insurance if car is a write off?

its been a week since this guy hit me from behind. he was 100% at fault. how long do i have to wait to find out if my car was a write off? the car is fixable and i need to know how much to fix? want my car back!!!!!

How do I register a restored classic car without a VIN?

What my question more specifically is, is- If I restore a 69 Camaro from the ground up, and the vehicle does not have a VIN number and no original parts, how do I register it? How does the DMV determine the year of the car is 1969?""

What car company is the cheapist to insure in Canada Ontario?

i'm purchasing a car in the next few months and i've been looking for cars that im intersted in buying. i've narrowed it down to a: mazda toyota volkswagon jetta 0r honda. which brand is the cheaper one to insure? and what car in particular might you suggest?

What is the most affordable life insurance and health insurance?

Where can I find Affordable Health and life insurance for me and my wife. What is the best web site with online quotes?

How can i claim for a new alternator under insurance- it cost me 400?

I am selling my car, and I would like to get some cash from my insurance policy. I just had a new alternator fitted 2 weeks ago- any ideas??""

Can the auto insurance kick you out?

1st time geting a license at the age of 63 then having 1st month of insurance then 3 weeks later geting an accident which involving crashing into an property which i assume the damage cost from the insruance eyes would be $25-30,000 where our eyes would be at maybe $10,000 plus they were 4 in the car all injured can the auto insurance kick a insurer out for this very 1st major incident? this shouldnt be suprising to any insurance company when it comes to New Drivers reguardless of age...bottom line can they kick them out and other insurance corps deny to sell insurance?""

Car Insurance for a 19 yr old male?

I'm going to be buying an black 03 Cadillac CTS and I was wondering about how much my insurance would be. I've been driving since I was 16 with no tickets or wrecks. Can anyone give me at least an estimate on what it might cost? I will be using it mostly to drive back and fourth to work.

How much does car insurance cost for a 17 year old?

I'm currently 17 with and just got my license a couple of weeks ago, i was wondering how much does the insurance cost annually for a 17 year old like me? Thanks for your help!""

Does anyone have the Mid-West Live insurance company of Tennessee?

An insurance agent sold this to my parents and I wish they put everything into layman's term. They bought this through a group called the Alliance for Affordable Services. They have a $5000 deductible but the policy reads like this: Hospital room/board has CoInsurance of 100% with Maximum up to $1000 per day. What is Coinsurance? Do they still have to pay something after their $5000 deductible? Thanks in advance.

Should i be mad at my husband or his mother?

my husband gave his entire paycheck to his mother to pay her bills, She had a bunch of vet bills, her other sons (hes 30ish and has a job w/ insurance) medical bills, and a 1000.00 dollar tattoo, but couldnt pay her bills. our house payment was due and now i cant pay it cause he gave her all this money? also he chewed me out cause i started crying when he told me he did this. Help plese what should i do. p.s we have 3 small children that this could have helped out for food and stuff liek that.""

Can I buy motorcycle inssurance and not have parents know about it?

I'm 22 I live in my own apartment but my parents pay car insurance can I get a seperate insurance for a motorcycle and not have my parents know about it, also my friend who rides said bike insurance can be very cheap I just want minimum coverage how much would it be, thx!""

Around how much would insurance be in georgia for a 16 year old with a 2008 yamaha r1?

Around how much would insurance be in georgia for a 16 year old with a 2008 yamaha r1?

Driver's Test Insurance?

Im going to take the driver's test next month but have no insurance. The car is under my dad's name and is insured under his name. Can I use his car and insurance for the test or do I have to get my own insurance for it?

How to get Health Insurance when you are 17?

My parents are divorced and my sister and I have been living with our mom. However, we received health insurance through our father's place of work. Now he is applying for disability and has quit his job, so currently my sister and I have no health insurance. Because of this, my mom forbids me to take my car or motorcycle out because if my sister or I get hurt, there is no way for us to pay for it (we are suffering financially because my mom's hours at work got cut, and she is still recovering from breast cancer). Anyway, is there any way for me to obtain health insurance (or at least help my mom to) that would be affordable? We live in New York State""

Is it true that you have a red car you pay less insurance?

one of my friends told me that if you have a red car you pay less insurance ... i wanted to know if this is true and if so what is the reason for it .. thanks for the info and God Bless

How much would it cost to insure a new Mazda3?

I want to buy a new ('08 or '09) Mazda 3. It would go on my parents insurance, and they both have a clean record. How much would it cost to insure? I live in Nassau County, NY (Long Island).""

I can't afford my car insurance...?

I need transportation so I can work. But why should I have to choose between car insurance or food and medicine? Shouldn't the Government come up with a single payer plan for automotive insurance too! Its not fair that I have to pay for this out of my own pocket.

What is the best way to get into insurance sales?

I'm quite interested in the insurance business, and i've heard various methods, one is to get hired into a captive insurance company as customer service and then express an interest in the business, then you have to study for and pass a state exam, and get licensed. but i'm curious what is the possibilities i'd find a company to hire me right away as a salesperson, my background is wireless sales. The thing i'd like to know is, what can I expect my first year in the business, is it entirely full commission or is there a mix of salary and commission? and lastly, what are the odds of a new agent making it for say three to five years? I'm looking for a career for the next 25+ years.""

Am I paying too much for car insurance?

IM 19 years old, I pay $100 per month with geico, I have not had any speeding tickets, I have not been in any accidents, I had my license for about a 3 - 6 months now, I own a 1997 ford Taurus. Am I paying too much for car insurance?""

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

Does anyone know of a good /cheap health insurance?

I need to get health ins. for a nursing program I'm going into, do you know of a cheap one? I have no pre-existing ailments, an 46yrs. old and in good health. I live in San Antonio, Tx. thx.""

Car insurance?

How much is insurance going to go up if you had 2 accidents under the time of 3 months. First accident wasn't our fault but second was.

How much does insurance cost for a bently?

I was wondering how much it would cost for a 16 year old. I'm not getting one cuz I'm not rich but I'm just curious

""Will the Supreme Court ruling on Affordable Care Act affect those under 26, and on their parents insurance?""

I am a 20 year old man, and I suffer from a couple health problems that I must have treatment for. I have a job, but I do not make enough money to afford my own health insurance, so I am on my father's. I am able to do this now because the new law allows me to remain on my father's insurance until my 26th birthday. If the supreme court rules that the mandate in question is unconstitutional will it effect that specific part of the law? Am I in danger of losing my health coverage?""

Do you have health insurance?

if so, how much is it per month? how old are you? what kind of dedutactable do you have? feel free to answer also if you do not have insurance and do you support obamacare?""

Can I get off of my parents auto insurance?

So when I got my license when I was 19 about two years ago I was automatically put on my moms nationwide insurance which was fine because I drove one of her cars but now she only has one vehicle and although I do still live at home I'm a full time student at a community college so she usually drives me around so she can keep the car so in order to save money would I be able to drop myself from her car insurance policy since I don't really drive anyway?

What type of Life Insurance Should I get?

I am 33 and I'm pretty sure that I want to get term life insurance. I have a wife and 2 kids. It's affordable. I'm in good health. My question is should I get a 15 yr plan or 20 yr plan? Money is a little tight so I'm thinking the 500K or 750K plan.

I suffer chronic pain and have trouble working. I'm 37. I have no health insurance. I need advice please.?

I'm 37, and I have degenerative joint disease of both hips (related to a childhood hip disorder). My hips ache, but I also suffer chronic back pain/strain from the effects of a car accident in '04. I have no health insurance, and I don't earn much money. I am forced to live with parents. Needless to say, my life is not very bright. I also suffer severe depression brought upon by my life situation. I returned to college last year, and I am working towards finishing my degree (English/ethnic studies). I need help, both medical/financial help, but I'm not sure where to turn. The job I have is an independent contractor job (I'm not a salaried employee); therefore, I have no benefits. I just drive around to local police stations, pick-up arrest records, transcribe them, and send them in to company. Very basic! My life feels like a living hell; the only thing that makes me feel better is that I am an active student (CSULB) who is about one year away from my degree (better late than never). But I have extreme difficulty functioning day-to-day because of my chronic pain issues and depression. Living with my parents at my age makes my depression worse. I would appreciate any advice. The last full-time job I had was when I worked for the city of Los Angeles (up to 2007), but I had to give that up because of my hip/pain problems. It was a civil service job, so we didn't pay into social security. I'm not sure what I qualify for, and trying to search around on the internet is exhausting. I'm basically in this position: little money - chronic/daily pain - ho health insurance - difficulty working a regular job Thank you to anyone who might offer some guidance or recommendations. I live in Southern California.""

Where can I find the cheapest car insurance?

I'm living in Arkansas (working in Texas and in Arkansas). I'm an 18 year old male. I need to obtain FULL coverage on a 2000 Mazda Protege. The cheapest quote I had found (through Geico I believe) is $585/month for full coverage.. that's over $7000 a year... I have two tickets on my record. That quote was done without listing any tickets at all. I work 65 hours a week, so the only place I really drive is to my jobs and back. Unfortunately, I need a car in a hurry.. which means I'm going to finance one, which means full coverage is required. Any recommendations on places to get quotes from aside from geico and progressive?""

Insurance troubles while pregnant?

Did you have any drama with insurance coverage or any insurance problems when you were pregnant? If so, what happened?""

Rental Car Insurance-I don't have a auto insurance.What are the coverage i have to buy from rental company?

Hi,I'm new to US.I stay in california.I want to rent a car and confused with the insurance options.could anyone help me,what are all the coverages(LDW,SLP etc) that i need to rent a car?.I don't have a personal auto insurance.""

Insurance costs for a Yamaha Majesty?

or Yamaha Morphous? I want to purchase one of these two scooters, although I'm leaning more towards the Majesty. For a good driver with a good record, How much is the insurance on these?""

""I need Health Insurance, had Gastric Bypass, On unemployment.... Help?""

I had Gastric Bypass in May of this year. I am on unemployment and wanted to pay out of pocket for insurance because I have had complications. I applied but was denied because of the surgery in the past. I have searched for a job and nothing. Ive been with my Boyfriend for the past 4 months, but his insurance says something about domestic partnership but only after 12 months of living together. How can I get around this, I need health insurance. Anyone else have the same issues? Let me know I am confused here.""

Which insurance companies will have to pay to fix my car? Mine or the other guy?

I had a car accident two days ago. I was hit by other one but police said that's a miner damage. And it seems to be my fault. No police report make. Today, I went to a body shop to estimate the repair. It's about around $2200-3000. It's a lot. kinda scared me actually. No idea should i call my insurance company to tell them or? That's my first time to have a car accident. My insurance has $200 deductible. Can anyone tell me what does that mean?""

Vw Lupo S insurance group 1.4L?

What insurance group would a 1.4L Lupo be in. Also roughly what price would it be in that group. Im 17 and after a quote with no modifications.

Phoenix Auto Insurance?

Where can I get auto insurance in Phoenix? What do you recommend? I bought a car recently and I'd like to find a cheap way to insure it.

Cheapest auto insurance company?

Currently have Geico. paying close to 2k / year for auto insurance (full cover). Can anyone recommend a cheaper insurance company? I have 13 years of driving experience with clean record (not a single traffic violation or speeding ticket)

Motorcycle insurance for a 17 year old?

i Live in Texas and I'm gonna get a yamaha and it's a cruiser and has a 942cc engine, would my insurance be crazy exspensive or reasonable?""

How much is auto insurance for a minor?

I'm about to get my license, how much is it to add me (16) to my parents car insurance? Don't give me anything like, It's different for everyone. I know. Just tell me what you are paying, or what you used to pay.""

Do you have health insurance?

If you dont then why ?

Someone hit me and they cancelled their car insurance?

I was hit by a moving truck (chevy), while I was in a parking lot. My car was not moving at the time the truck hit me. He gave me his car insurance info and phone number. I tried calling his number and I reached a dead end. I started a claim through Farmers insurance and I got a call today saying the claim was cancelled, because the gentleman in question cancelled his insurance the day the accident took place. What do I do now?""

How much might my car insurance be?

I want to know how much would my car insurance be if im sixteen and im driving a 94 dodge stealth. I am also a guy. I know sports cars cost more to insure so could you please include the price of insurance for a normal car as well??? Located in Tampa, Florida Thanks for any help you can offer, -Kyle""

How do you find affordable medical insurance to cover family after the breadwinner becomes disabled?

How do you find affordable medical insurance to cover family after the breadwinner becomes disabled?

How to make health insurance more affordable/cheaper?

can someone give me some sites to provide me with information? i have to do a problem-solution speech on economic change. sites with statistics are definitely desired.

What is the best insurance for a new driver in nyc?

I've been driving for 2 yrs now but got my license about 2 months ago. Im 21 and limited on cash. I need a cheap auto insurance because driving right now is essential with the MTA fare hike.

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

Milwaukee Wisconsin Cheap car insurance quotes zip 53214

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/auto-insurance-employer-jacob-andrews/"

[queercripbreakfastenthusias-blog]

A Thing About the Hospital

This is the seventh time I’ve tried to write this. I don’t really know what I’m trying to do, or if this one will stick, but here it goes.

On the eve of the first day of classes of this semester, I made myself a list of Junior Spring 2017 Semester Goals. With a significant chunk of my closest Bowdoin friends going abroad for the semester, a packed course schedule, and a new year’s resolution to practice radical self care, I knew it was going to be a semester of change, of new challenges, and of pushing myself outside of my comfort zone. In my pre-classes anxiety, I made myself a list of silly, serious, self-indulgent goals to find comfort and excitement in the changes to come.

But in reality, I had no idea what this semester was going to throw at me. Since January, I’ve been dealing with A Series of Unfortunate Medical Events, and I’m choosing to write about it and talk about it openly because that tends to be how I deal and process hard things best. I remember the ordeal in moments, in chunks, like pieces of a puzzle that I haven’t figured out how to solve yet. I’m choosing to share some of the pieces because I love my body. I love the messy reality of it, the fact that it can hug the people I love, that it can learn things that interest me, and take me places I want to see. I’m also terrified of my body—the unpredictability of it, the way it reminds me that we’re small beautiful globs of cells that exist in a universe much bigger and stronger than we are. The experience of this semester encapsulates all of that—the good, the powerful, the scary, the messy, and the imperfections.

To consolidate a month-long ordeal into a few quick sentences, here are the important things to know about what’s been happening with me: In late January/early February, I was hospitalized with a blood infection. The origins of the infection are still unknown, but I received an intensive IV-antibiotic therapy to fight the bacteria. I stayed five days at Mid Coast Hospital for the infection. Sionnain, my magnificent partner, happened to be visiting the day I was hospitalized, and stood by my side through this whole ordeal with endless bravery and love. My kickass mom flew in from New Jersey, and her patience with me and care for me speak volumes of what a fantastic, loving, forgiving parent she is. She bought kinetic sand and a ton of board games at Wal-Mart, and Sionnain and Mom and I built a giant sandcastle in my hospital room in the middle of a blizzard. They supported me, and comforted me, and didn’t laugh (or only laughed a little) when I accidentally flashed an entire hospital hallway with my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles underwear (hospital gowns, am I right?).

About twelve hours after being discharged for the infection, I ended up right back in the hospital with back pain so bad I couldn’t breathe or move or speak. A blood clot stopped the flow of oxygen to a portion of my lung, killing a small section of my right lung. I had a pulmonary embolism, and found out I have a genetic blood clotting disorder. Having an infection, a clotting disorder, and being holed up in a hospital bed—it was the perfect storm of conditions for me to get a blood clot. I spent another four days in the hospital, and then was discharged to re-enter life at Bowdoin. As a physically disabled queer person, my relationship with my body has never been an easy one. The medical stuff hit on a ton of my messy fears related to control over and comfort within my body. To put it simply, this whole ordeal was just that: an ordeal. I cried because of ableist doctors, dealt with homophobic nurses, missed exams, quit a campus job, and had to drop a class. I’m now back in a “normal” Bowdoin routine, and I’ve been slowly regaining my footing. I’ve been contending with the uncomfortable, scary reality that sometimes, we lose control and shitty things happen. There isn’t always a witty punchline or a bright side or a neatly packaged life lesson to take away when something unexpected and hard happens. So that brings me here: to the end of my junior spring, alive and recovering and healthy, which feels miraculous and small and bizarre and normal all at once.

I’m the same person I was on that January night when I wrote these semester goals. However, it would be partially inaccurate to say that things haven’t changed. Taking care of my body means something very different now than it did before this all happened. My body is my home. My body has always been my home that kept me safe for twenty-one years, until suddenly, it didn’t keep me safe anymore. Suddenly, my body threatened me and defied me with clots and bacteria and pain and exhaustion. That was terrifying. But my body is still my home. Just as it fought me, it ultimately protected me. And I forgive my body, because my body allowed me to heal, to survive, and to reach out for the people I love when it felt like my body was betraying me. Now, caring for my body means trusting it, and listening to what it is trying to tell me. It means listening and responding to the pain, the exhaustion, the limits. My body is my home, and homes need upkeep. Homes need repair. This semester, I’ve become a human Home Depot project of restoration and care. I’ve had to ask for help, and it’s been painful, and I’ve made mistakes along the way, but this semester has shown me that my body—my home—has to come first. Rather than making me weak, I think that makes me strong as hell.

When I said that one of my semester goals was to have more dance parties, I didn’t really think that my first dance party of the semester would be the day I was discharged. I was told that in order to prevent more blood clots I needed to be frequently and actively moving, so naturally, on the day I got home Alix and Ethan and Sionnain spun and jumped around my room with me to Blink-182 and ABBA and Cher. Sometimes dance parties look different than you envision. Sometimes goals need amending, and don’t really go as planned. But let me tell you: a dance party is a dance party, whether you’re shimmying your shoulders while hooked up to an IV, or rejoicing in life and health and survival with the people you love. And there is joy in that.

In a lot of ways, things feel different now. Being at Bowdoin feels the same and unknown and confusing all at once. I am learning and re-learning what it means to be alive and take up space on this campus and in this world. I guess I am figuring it out, but honestly, I don’t really know what all of this means or why any of this happened. However, I do know that I am surrounded by people who love me, and help me survive and make sense of it all. Ultimately, that’s what matters. I owe my recovery, and being okay, and becoming more okay every day, to a lot of people. To all of my friends at Bowdoin who fed me snacks and visited me in the hospital. To Clare, for letting me cry on the phone and bringing me a McFlurry in the ER. To Tessa, for making me go to the hospital to begin with, and always knowing what to say, and always showing up in the most important way. To Sydney, for encouraging me to write this. To my Dad and my siblings, for dropping everything and flying to be near me and make me laugh. To my Mom, for staying in Maine for two weeks in the middle of February even though the only shoes she packed were leather clogs, and for letting me be cranky, and for being nice and caring and endlessly supportive even when I acted like a jerk to her. And to Sionnain, for helping me put the puzzle pieces together, for holding my hand and loving me so fiercely through all of it, and for everything. There aren’t enough words to capture how thankful I am.

During the long days in the hospital, Sionnain and I would walk down the endless corridors to keep me moving. She’d wheel my IV pole along, her hand wrapped around it securely as we slowly moved, side by side, through those increasingly familiar hallways. We joked that Sionnain holding my IV pole was like us holding hands—the thin plastic tube and metal pole connected us as we meandered. We would walk down a maze of hallways to the Meditation Room, a small room built for reflection and prayer. It offered a quiet bluish glow, with stained glass, cheesy plastic bird statues, and a loop recording of babbling water. For small moments out of the visibility of the hallways, I could stand in the purple light of that small room, close my eyes, hold Sionnain’s reassuring hand, and find myself away from the hospital chaos. There was a book in the corner that people could sign and leave words of hope or prayers. On the day I was admitted, someone wrote about losing her brother that morning. Ed, we will miss you. The next day, five-year-old Maddie wrote a note welcoming her new baby brother, Collin, into the world. I AM A BIG SESTER.

In the course of this whole event, people have been born, and died, and lost loved ones, and set goals they couldn’t achieve, and gotten diagnoses, and shopped at Home Depot, and seen new places, and eaten McFlurrys, and had dance parties, and built sandcastles in Maine in February. People have laughed, and cried, and figured it out, and gotten in wrong, and made mistakes. I’m still figuring it out, and reminding myself that it’s okay to not really know what I’m doing or why this happened or what it means. I am alive and loved and loving and a beautiful glob of cells that gets to exist in this universe, and that works for me.