#ive barely done any drawing that i want to do since at least September???

[speckofhope]

me realizing that, for the first time in months, i can in fact do literally anything other than work and can draw whatever idea i have and do in fact have time and free will

[grub-talk]

Coughs

All offense but yall are typing shit out of your ass. Don't play the "Oh i looked up to you" or " I kept you at arms length" I'm sorry but you're throwing and pinning this all on me because your friend was lying and you don't want to actually hold them accountable. This dude have neglected, avoided me and made me think I was the issue when I tried to communicate any flaws we had during our relationship. [ Which, note, they also admitted this TO MY FUCKING FRIEND.] Whatever they fucking skewed or try to blame me on, they neither have communicated it with me or brought it up AT ALL, and even if they did; they used it against me TO HURT ME. I've always been upfront about my problems to you and my friends and if there is actually ANY point you're trying to come across, its not hitting the end goal here. You've seen how emotionally distressed I was, and if there is any thought of actually being genuine and honest with how my actions coudlve been viewed. None of yall did anything about it but said "learn self respect, learn self love" and even RELATED to me on what I was going through. You're fucked for being two faced cunts. I came to YOU for help, I MADE EFFORTS. But im not gonna sit there and let them treat me that fucking way. Its fucked how all of you guys are attacking me and using your good deeds, WHICH BTW, doesnt make your points anymore foul than what it actually is. It does not make you a good person. Thank you for having HUMAN DECENCY to try and help me when I was at my lowest and was considering to fucking end my life, I understand me being thrown into a bad mania episode had left me doing some deplorable behavior. WHICH I DO ADMIT, COULDVE BEEN HANDLE BETTER but your friend still was a piece of shit to me and said really hurtful things and done shit before we've broken up. Which you know, I wish I didn't fucking excuse and forced myself to let them keep doing it to me. DRAWING yourself killing me, calling me a black hole and claiming ive "taken" everything from them, when I have spent so much of my energy and fucking time to love and adore them. I wanted them to make sure they know that they are loved because I was so blind to believe they where an actual nice person. Hell, I went to a whole ass different COUNTRY just to meet them, only for them to be on their phone 24/7 saying they felt "rushed" when I told them about this planned trip SINCE SEPTEMBER. WHICH THEY COULDVE AT ANY POINT SAID "No thank you" oh yeah are we gonna forget they barely communicated about those plans too? Which they slapped that shit onto their friends and made them deal with it? Yes, thank you for inviting me, Kashi. I am so fucking embarrassed that everything came down to this point. I do bare so many regrets on every going because not you, or your room mates had to deal with the embarrassing tension that my ex and I gone through. It still eats me up everytime I think about it, cause its fucking disgusting and I never wanted to go home so fucking bad. Only to find out literally TWO DAYS AGO they've actually stolen OC'S that I praised them on making. Which, my other friends can fucking CONFIRM they claimed it was their art. Get the fuck out. Also, me not wanting them to have a new partner??? FELLA, what are you BULLSHITTING ABOUT. you're grasping at LITERAL STRAWS here. No one gives a FUCK about who they are dating. Least not with me? I don't care about their partner, whatever was exchanged between Evan and my Ex[ Their ex also.] had ZERO of my influence there if rather or not they will actually go to them about it. They told me they where gonna confront them, so they did. Im proud of them for even talking about this PUBLICLY. So DONT YOU DARE PIN THAT SHIT AGAINST ME. IDGAF ABOUT THEIR CURRENT SIGNIFICANT OTHER. WHATEVER THEY DO IS NOT MY BUSINESS. I'm thankful enough I have people who love me. You are deflecting and making yourselves even more stupid than I have thought. Im sorry but no one gives a FUCK about their current partner, youre going off the main point shows how actually blinded you are.

Also PLEASE shut the fuck up about stalking, literally all you guys ever done was do the SAME EXACT SHIT. Why where you on my toyhouse profile, why where you visting my tumblr, WHY where you on MY twitter account? I'm sorry no one gives a fuck about whos stalking who, you said it for yourself you fucking idiot. Its made public so therefore PEOPLE WILL SEE IT. MY FRIENDS CAN SEE IT, I CAN SEE IT. I am fully aware that what I post is public too and will eventually be seen, THATS FINE. OH YEAH, BY THE WAY, I HAVENT EVEN FUCKING VISITED YOUR PROFILE EVER SINCE OUR LAST DISCUSSION! I was hellbent on not checking anyones accounts. I was hellbent on moving on with the idea of ignorance is bliss. IVE ONLY WENT ON BECAUSE I FOUND OUT WHO THE REAL ARTIST WAS!!! I spent fucking time deleting and separating the character to find the signature, looked them up and BOOM. IT WAS YOUR EX?? the main issue here is that your friends A FUCKING LIAR. " My partner left me because of Hazbin" No you fucking idiot I left you because you're where making me run through hoops to try and FIX things that WHERE OUT OF MY CONTROL. Don't you dare ignore that I havent made actual efforts while you sat there doing fuck all nothing. And btw, i'm not the only person youve done this too and said "oh idk what to do" WE KEEP FUCKING TELLING YOU WHAT TO DO. Holy shit YOU'RE ALL SO FUCKING STUPID!! I SWEAR!!! ACTUALLY THINK FOR YOURSELVES, I DON'T CARE HOW MUCH YOU ALL CIRCLE JERK EACH OTHER OFF. Literally SO OVER THIS.