#its very subjective and i am very aware of that hehe

[mekatrio]

this is just a sloppy list and if im not lazy ill pretty it up later + factcheck the dates, but i think? this is the order that the characters received backstories:

- mary, imagination forest MV (feb 2012), her backstory is referenced in novel 4 (aug 2013), and later receives a manga arc that explores it further in uh 2014. she gets an anime episode too

- momo, kisaragi attention MV (may 2012), her backstory receives further exploration in novel 1 + the manga, both released in 2012

- shintaro, toumei answer MV (may 2012), but only in the children record booklet (aug 2012) does it confirm that shintaro became a neet after ayano's suicide

- takane, novel 2 (sep 2012). technically the first character to receive a 'full' backstory (excluding the context of mr2, this applies for everyone btw). this is bc unlike the previous three charas, those character's 'backstories' function more as 'premises' and still leaves a lot unanswered regarding their characters (namely, where did momomary's powers come from?) meanwhile, takane is the first character with pretty cut and clear explanations for why she is in her current predicament (though ofc theres still unanswered questions, bc the story isnt complete yet)

- ayano, ayano's theory of happiness MV (april 2013) (jfc this released earlier than i thought). her backstory is expanded further in novel 5 (mar 2014), which is later adapted in mca episode 11

- hibihiyo, novel 3 (may 2013). their backstories are later adapted in mca episode 4 (2014)

- azami, novel 4 (aug 2013). technically her backstory is shown off earlier with shinigami record + children record booklet (both aug 2012), but im counting those as her premise, and novel 4 as an actual backstory. her backstory is adapted into a manga arc in Umm 2015

- saeru, outer science mv (aug 2013). his role in the story however is first hinted at in the mary's fictional world manga chapter that was released in limited edition versions of Mekakucity Records (may 2013).

- seto, shounen brave mv (jan 2014)

- kano, novel 5 (mar 2014)

- haruka/konoha, mca episode 7 (may 2014). this is later expanded on in novel 6 (mar 2015)

- kido, novel 7 (aug 2016). yeah yeah we see her with rin in an mca episode at some point in 2014 but im not counting that as her backstory bc it doesnt rly explore shit

[merakiui]

Mera I beg of you, just a morsel, a sliver even, of overblot malleus content....

I am here to deliver a morsel of Malleus!!! >w< if you aren't aware of its existence, I also wrote an overblot Mal fic that can be found here!

I actually really love everything about Malleus in book 7. The absurd power he holds, the way he's essentially stitching together ideal dreams for NRC students (or dreams he thinks are ideal). I love the fact that he's poking his nose in and out of various dreams to ensure every dreamer remains sleeping. It's so eerie. The amount of control he has. I genuinely believe, if not for Silver's UM being a foil to Malleus, it's very likely he would have won and Sage's would've remained locked in eternal slumber. If anyone has watched Centaurworld, Mal reminds me of the Nowhere King's lullaby...... orz

I still can't get over how he breaks the fourth wall in the beginning of book 7 to hum the opening. That's still so insane to me........ top ten twst moments of all time omg!!!!

Ramblings aside, what if he constructs a dream for you in which you return home....... based on what you've told him about where you come from, he's able to use those details and take a few creative liberties of his own to construct a dream in which you've made it back home. But there's always something so unsettling and not-quite-right about this dream version of your world. Malleus's own preferences spill into the dream, and everywhere you go you're seeing bits and pieces of Mal. The trees that sway in the breeze look startlingly like a certain pair of emerald green eyes. The people who inhabit this dream feel so two-dimensional. It's home, or is it? Weirdcore vibes all around. <3

And of course there's the classic somno thoughts in which you're dreaming peacefully all while your body in the real world is subjected to Malleus's selfish, wicked indulgences.

Aaaa but maybe,,,, disregarding most of book 7 altogether,,, what if your ideal dream is just full of freakiness? >:) monsterfucking route where it's just you and overblot gangbang hehe. Or or!!!! To bring back apocalypse/infection au flavors....... a concept in which no one can stop Malleus and so everyone is trapped in eternal slumber. Maybe it's the blot that sustains the students after their internal faculties shut down. Waaaaa body horror + having to see your friends now in such a mindless state if you ever are granted the opportunity to wake up again,,, something something Mal needs wants a wife someone to rule alongside him and you're perfect for that role. Something something your friends aren't all there,,, reduced to undead dolls in a way.

Too many messy scenarios and thoughts,,, forgive how scattered it is, but I like overblot Malleus a lot. :3

[thenormaltrainer]

Hello！

My name is Nirvana､ at least､ that‵s what you‵ll be calling me． You can also use they/them for me､ unless you know me personally． In reality､ though､ I don‵t care． ♪

I attend BBA､ so if you wonder why I followed you､ it‵s probably because of that． I do battle､ but nobody will see my team､ not on here．

I also suffered an extreme concussion a few years ago､ so my memory may still be weird！

If you ever want a shiny Pokémon､ let me know､ because I have a few of them､ hehe！

-🕊️

hello! welcome to the ooc section of this blog... please, read it through before interacting! don't worry, as much text as there is, there are brief summaries.

about the mun/mod!

my name is adon! of course, you could refer to me as adonciant or guy either. i dont mind! i go by he/him only, but if you want to use any neopronouns, feel free. i am a minor! my main is @adonciant, which is where likes and follows will come from. of course, all my rp blogs are also listed in my pinned on main!

when a post is signed off with ~🎱, that means its me speaking. it will always be paired with ooc post

─ⵌ call me adon, he/him! main is @adonciant! ~🎱 is muns signoff

interaction!

pelipper mail/unmail/malice: allowed!

musharna mail/malice: allowed!

mystery gifts: allowed!

magic anon: allowed!

in-character anon hate: allowed!

ooc/questions: allowed!

anyone is allowed to interact with my blogs! fallers, eeby deebys, hybrids, sapients, self-inserts, ocs, and in-game characters are all very welcomed!

if you ever want to start a roleplay, it's best to discuss it with me first within the blogs dms, unless i already allowed an offscreen post.

note: if i dont get around to an ask, never take it personally! i will always read any asks i get, but i just may not respond if i dont find it necessary.

─ⵌ all interaction from all blogs are allowed, but discuss offscreen roleplays with me beforehand. i may not be able to get around to your ask, but don't take it personally!

boundaries/notices

─the mod is a minor, and the character is 17! slightly suggestive asks are fine, but never should it come close to nsfw.

─if you ever want to establish a connection between our characters, or want to plan events with yours involved, im always open for it! just dm me on either discord [username is adonciant] or on tumblr itself. i will be more than willing to hear your ideas and see what we can do!

─often times, i will do long threads of interaction. i like to reblog back and interact, but if you ever want me to stop without a sign in the roleplay itself for it to end, please tell me! alongside this, my threads do not get tagged with anything.

─there are a few content warnings to this blog. to roughly list, hospitalization, hallucinations, and general abuse/violence. this list is always subject to change, so stay aware. any triggering topics are tagged with associated tags ('topic' tw)

─ⵌ slighty suggestive asks are allowed, but nsfw is never allowed, always try to contact me if you want to establish connections or events, and heed the warnings! [you will need to read over the warnings.]

extra notes

i am 100% truthful when i say this is NOT a nagito komaeda faller． i drew him without any correlation to nagito and it was only brought to my attention by one of my friends that he looked like nagito． to me this was HILARIOUS and i had to continue the bit． this is a REGULAR STUDENT that is NOT a faller． the fact his name is nagito is because i flipped a coin． but please any asks relating to nagito is funny as fuck

nirvana is an online persona． his name is not actually nirvana､ nor does he actually go by they/them． his name is nagito khan��� goes by he/him

he also keeps his team a secret！ due to the entire online persona thing､ he tries to keep his identity a secret as well as he can！

[nastybuckybarnes]

Of Kings and Beasts  -  Nine

Pairing: King!Bucky X Princess!Reader X King!Steve

Summary: Born a bastard of the King of Orlen, you’re thrust to the West to marry the Kings. However, the greeting you get is anything but warm, and your life with the King is far from enjoyable. He knows it isn’t your fault his husband is gone, but that fact alone won’t prevent him from taking it out on you.

Warnings: Angst, Injuries, Fluff, Language, Violence, 

Word Count: 2.9K

A/n: Another chapter is finished!! I’ve got an idea but it’s SO DANGEROUS AND Y’ALL MIGHT HATE ME IF I DO IT BUT ITS SO TEMPTING AND I THINK I’M GONNA DO IT ahem anyway I hope you guys enjoy this!

A/n 2: I’m posting this before work so I’ll reply to asks and comments when I get home tonight! Also, I’ve got the next part of Gangsta written up if y’all want that.... hehe

THIS SERIES CONTAINS SMUT AND DARK THEMES THAT MAY BE TRIGGERING TO SOME AUDIENCES!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Series Masterlist

~*~

“How have you been adjusting to this new home?” Thor asks one morning, a smile on his face. You grin back at him, the weight of Acadia lifted off your shoulders as you take a sip of your tea.

“Quite well. Although Loki has been an interesting addition.” The raven-haired man looks up from his book momentarily and gives you a look, to which you only smile.

From the moment you entered the cottage you knew it would be good for you to stay here.

“Well, we are at your disposal. I will have to go back to Asgard within the weeks to come, but Loki and the Valkyrie shall remain here should you need or want them.” You nod gratefully, looking out the window and pursing your lips as you watch the women spar outside.

“What? What is it?” Thor asks, following your gaze.

“I want to learn to defend myself. To wield a sword and fight off an attacker.” Loki scoffs from where he sits, his nose still buried deep in his book.

“For what reason should a queen wish to learn to fight? You will always have men for that.” Your defence is up in an instant, and you clench your jaw before composing yourself enough to reply.

“I do think that considering both my upbringing and the way I have been treated in my new kingdom, I have every right to want to learn to defend myself. I have many reasons to want to defend myself, none of which concern you, however, if you had the slightest idea of all that I have endured in my short time as queen you would not question me wanting to learn to defend myself. I have been shunned from my palace because my husbands fear someone will kill me. My own husbands have brought me far more pain than I would like to admit. I have every right to wish to learn how to defend myself and I will not hear a word from you about the subject!”

His brows raise to nearly his hairline and he looks between you and his brother before burying his nose back in his book, which elicits a chuckle from the blond king.

“If the situation is so severe that I need be sent away for my own safety, I need to learn to defend myself.”

Thor nods, a strong hand patting your shoulder comfortingly.

“I knew there was a fire in you. I could see it in those eyes when you spoke of running from the Kings. I just needed to find it.” He rises to his feet and straightens his clothing. “Loki does have a special talent for pulling the fire from even the most docile creatures. But I will go speak with the valkyrie. They will be delighted to have a student to train.”

He leaves the cottage to interrupt the sparring outside, and you feel your heart skip a beat at the first piece of control that you will have over your life.

~*~

“If that will be all, You are dismissed,” King Steven says, his voice low and exhausted. The royal adviser bows then heads to the door, hesitating for a moment.

“Forgive me, Your Majesties, but I cannot help but notice the absence of the Queen. Where has she gone?” It’s not the first time they’ve gotten the question in the week that you've been gone, therefore they already have their excuse rehearsed and perfected.

“We simply have no use for her. If she cannot even bear our children then what use is she to us?” Comes Steve’s practiced response.

“We were instructed to find a queen who could produce strong heirs. Our wife cannot. So she is no longer of use to us,” James adds, his voice dripping in boredom as he looks over a document on his desk.

The royal advisor nods then excuses himself, bustling to his own office with newfound haste and purpose.

“It’s been a week and we are no closer to finding who it is than we were when she was here,” Steve murmurs after a long moment of silence, his shoulders heavy with the weight of their decision.

“I’m beginning to question whether it was a good decision to send her along with Thor. Especially after he threatened to make her a queen of his own. What if she were to agree?” James stands up and walks over to his husband, taking his shaking hands in his own and sighing.

“I would not blame her if she were to agree. We have treated her like a prisoner. I have... brutalized her and beaten her and I will never be able to repent. If she were to want him I would in no way blame her. He has provided her with a safe haven. She can confide in him and trust him in a way that she may not be able to again with us.” Steve sniffles and squeezes his eyes shut.

“We need to find who it is that has caused this and we need to make them pay.” James nods, smoothing his thumbs over the back of his husband’s hands.

“We will. But until we do, we must remain strong. The Doctor is recovering and when he is fully recovered we will ask him who it was that attacked him. We will find who is behind this, but we must be patient.”

~*~

“Again!” You raise your sword just in time to block a blow from one of the Valkyrie, grinding your teeth together as you push her back a step then swipe your own sword at her throat.

She hops backward, eyebrows raised in surprise.

“You are learning, Your Majesty. But you still hold back. Why? You cannot be afraid to hurt us,” The Captain says, walking forward and looking at you closely.

“You must show no mercy. Not when you must choose between your own life and the life of someone who means to do you harm. You will fight and you will fight to the death.”

Your entire body is burning with the exertion but you hold your ground, raising your sword and ready to go again.

“That’s what I like to see! Now, we go again!” Brunnhild exclaims, a grin on her face as she takes her fighting stance.

It’s just over two weeks since you began your training and everyone is surprised at how quickly you’re picking up on what’s being taught, but none more than you.

You’re just stepping out of the bath, muscles aching with a new type of strength that the Valkyrie have been beating into you, when your eyes catch a glimpse of movement at the window to your bedroom. A figure clad in all black is moving swiftly away from the cottage and disappearing into the darkness of woods, the setting sun aiding in the camouflage of the person.

Thinking that it’s none other than Loki going to wreak havoc on some poor defenceless wanderers, you don’t question it. Instead, you get dressed into a soft Asgardian gown and start preparing yourself for bed.

You’re just about ready to settle down with a book when a flash of white catches your eye from the window. You hesitantly investigate, heart hammering in your chest as you see a letter tucked securely in the window.

You open it and snatch the envelope before it can be taken by the wind, then shut the window again.

The seal on the envelope is that of Acadia, and your heart is in your throat as you realize that this could very well be a letter from the Kings. You’ve no idea what it may say, and cannot decide if you are more nervous or excited as you open it.

The script is not one you recognize, but your eyes greedily devour every word, the smile fading from your face at what lies on the page in your hand.

Thor finds you sometime later seated on the floor, the letter gripped tightly in your hands and your eyes focused on a point on the wall.

“(Y/n?” He asks softly, knocking against the doorframe to try and get your attention. You make no indication that you’ve heard him.

He enters the room, brows furrowed as he sees what you’re holding. “What is that? What does it say? Is it from the Kings?”

It takes a very long moment, but eventually, you find the strength to speak. But even then your voice is a weak rasp.

“Did you know the truth? Did you hide it from me as well?” Thor is beyond confused as he approaches you, taking the page from you and reading through the contents quickly.

‘Your Majesty,

Do not ask who I am nor how I know where you are, just know that you need be more careful who it is you call your lovers. They have sent you away, not for your own protection but because you failed at the task they wanted you for. They have sent you away because you failed to bear their children, this I promise I have heard with my own ears. I know not what they have told you but it is what I have witnessed. They have said this directly and I have heard it with my very own ears. You would do well to stay away from them, for they are dangerous. But I am certain that you and your late child are more than aware of that.

Consider this a warning, your majesty, for I know you are unsafe. You must take care and be far more careful of who you allow in your court.’

“Loki!” The prince is in the room within the same moment, his eyes full of confusion.

“Have the Valkyrie secure the area and find me the man who sent this! Travel to Acadia and alert the Kings. The Queen is no longer safe here.”

You’re confused. If the kings have directly told someone this, why then is Thor responding in such a way?

Loki is on horseback heading towards Acadia only moments later, and Thor is leaving the room as soon as the Valkyrie enter.

Brunnhild crouches next to you, a frown on her face as she glances at the note on the floor, its words echoing in your ears.

“Do not allow this to scare you, Your majesty. Do not give them the satisfaction of that.” You scoff and shake your head at her, “it is far easier said than done. All my life I have been punished for ever speaking, much less standing my ground. I have perfected the art of cowering, for men wish to do nothing but hurt and maim all so they can gain power.”

She sits down and shakes her head, taking your hand in hers and squeezing it tightly.

“You forget that we are all brought into this world through blood and through pain, your Majesty. We are the daughters of savage women. We are their savage daughters and we will act like it. We will bite and scream and we will take up space. We will not conform to their ideas of what women should be.” Her words are whispered into the still air of the room as if she were hiding them from any listening ears.

“Do not lower your voice for any man. Do not cower beneath them. You are a powerful being. One that can create life and you can also take it away, never forget that.” She pulls a dagger off of her belt and hands it to you, curling your fingers around the hilt before she continues speaking.

“You have the blood of goddesses and witches flowing through your veins. You hold a power that men could never understand. With every step we take, every time we refuse to cower... we honour our mothers, our grandmothers, and the ones before them. The ones who stood and fought and were torn to pieces. We will not be silenced. You will not be silenced. You are more powerful than that. You must remember your strength and your power. Do not let the men convince you that you are anything less than what you are.”

Your eyes sting and your throat gets tight, but she only hugs your shoulders and continues speaking.

“Your power is what scares them. Why else would they try to assert their dominance in such a way? But you will not fall. You will not allow them to treat you like that because you are the daughter of a savage. You are yourself a savage woman and you will act like it. Royal title be damned.”

You sniffle once, twice, three times, then nod, wiping your eyes just as Thor re-enters the room.

The Valkyrie take their leave and the King sighs, crouching down next to you and gently stroking your cheek.

“I’m so very sorry, Petal. You are no longer safe here. If someone was able to bring you this letter then I fear you are in far more danger than we had thought. The conspiracy against the Kings runs far deeper than any of us could have anticipated, and if we are to keep you safe then we must act quickly.” He pulls you to your feet and bustles around quickly, covering your shoulders in a thick cloak and packing a bag of your belongings.

“Wait, where do you mean to take me? If I am not safe anywhere?”

He tosses your bag over his shoulder and grabs your hand, entwining your fingers and giving your hand a soft squeeze.

“The only place you will truly be safe.” You’re still quite confused.

“We make for Asgard.”

[papirfecni]

Hello Azra!

I hope you're having a great day 😀.

Look, i don't mean no harm nor want to be hateful to you or anything you do..(but i might actually be), what i'm about to say might be mean and it's probably gonna look like a hate comment or something 😅 but i assure you, i have nothing against you 🙂.

I'm getting this out of my chest bcs i want to, and since you don't reply to your DMs or anything else i thought my last chance is to tell you anonymously..here ...tbh, bcs humans are weird 😒 .

So i was one of your followers/fans and i really liked your work, you were funny and you were entertaining in every way..you might still be (i dunno tho') i even liked your taste in music and i thought it matches mine in a weird way.. i, like any other fan thought highly of you and did anything to be noticed by you 😂 which sounds silly now that i say it.. but it's something that we all do and i'm sure you have done this yourself 😉.

I tried my best to cut you some slack bcs you are famous and i don't know your circumstances or anything about you... but at some point you had me and gave me some of your time and i thought to myself .. 'why did she? i am just as any other excited fan who did everything to be noticed.. why give 𝓂𝑒 the time?'

Don't get me wrong, i knew you were just being nice 😆... but i thought to myself 'does she do that with everyone then? voice chat, play games, share informations...? which is odd.. bcs isn't she scared of creeps and weirdo who maybe have bad intentions...'

I'm a humble one but just like a normal person i got greedy and i felt like we might be friends lol 🤣 i even start talking to some of your close friends and i wished to be as cool just to be friendly with you all (not just you...no offence) bcs for some reasons i found a lot in common between me and you all, but i was too normal and too boring for you maybe a little too nice too 🙃.

The point is, after that you started ghosting me after telling me that we would do it again (play and stuff).. you never reply.. you don't see my comments nor msgs... i know i wasn't special but i really wanted to play more and have fun while i still could at that time 😅.

I just wished you never gave me a chance to look forward to an awsome friendship with such great and fun people like yourselves...

Once again, don't get me wrong.. clearly i have issues 🙃 and if i don't adress them the proper way then they will come and bite me in the butt 😆.

What i'm trying to say here is .. as much as i liked your spirit, your humour but more importantly your 𝒜𝑅𝒯 ofc, now i don't even want to see nothing that has anything to do with you... even your name makes me cringe (the fact that my mother has the same name isn't helping -.-') and i hate that bcs i missed how despite being so invisible back then .. i enjoyed everything you did..

I wish i never made that piece of art that made you follow me which made me feel so guilty for not following you back which is the one thing that led to another until it became no fun no more...

I missed your art and it feels bad now to interact with it after you belittled me and basically made me feel like sh*t (sorry..) when you ghosted and rejected all my requests..

I wish you read this and i wish you don't hate me for being ..umm weird and mentaly disturbed obviously 😅lol despite being anonymous i feel so seen..

you are a great artist and a .. well uuh a funny person? lol (that's all i could think about 🤣) i was a fool to think that you thought of me differently and for being greedy to have more fun time with you and your friends.. so umm i hope you take my honesty as .. umm a point that needed to be ..umm adressed and not as a hate comment or ..umm a speech at this point 😬 hehe

Just a word of advice.. don't say things that you don't mean to fans no more 🤣 they will be excited and they will feel special and it will be disastrous if you don't meet their expectations haha.

Despite feeling guilty for being too honest ..maybe to the mean point, i am 𝑔𝓁𝒶𝒹 that i got that out of my chest, i am trying my best to talk about this silly subject as civilized as possible so you don't get me wrong 🤠.

Good luck with whatever you're doing in your life and i wish you all the best 😺.

P.S: drink more water instead... it's very important to stay hydrated 💧 ✌️

i wasnt gonna respond to this originally but youre getting people i dont even know involved in this fsr so.

sending me shit anonymously expressing why youre mad at me is one thing but going around and telling random people in their fucking CCs about it (and naming me too) like its a warcrime not to respond to your dms personally is really fucking weird. im an average ass person with a hobby who uploads their work online, i’m not a fucking celebrity or “famous” for this or any other reason, i sure as fuck dont have any fans and i genuinely dont understand your obsession with that concept??? why am i the one getting blamed for making you feel special for simply talking to you and being friendly when youre the one acting like i have paparazzi following me around lmao i have classes to attend and study for, i have friends irl and family that i spend time with, i have a tiny group of online close friends i talk to regularly, i eat and sleep - a day is 24 hours for me too lmao. on top of that im generally bad at responding to dms as im very introverted with a terrible memory; it’s never anything personal, i’m simply busy or just forget to text back which my friends are aware of and have no problem with. i seriously had nothing against you, you’re very sweet and talented but you don’t know me, we hung out once for an hour as friends and that was it, i’m confused as to how me not responding was such a traumatic event for you when it’s a normal thing that happens with everyone especially if you’re not close friends. if youre trying to befriend someone you should behave like it and not like youre chasing someone unreachable lol. anyway im glad you got free therapy out of this i really loved the random cursive letters you added for dramatic effect as well as the subtle drags 10/10

[pompompurin1028]

Honestly I- I was shook too like what😭 I was all like “what kind of an unholy word are we living in and how the hell did you have an access to this unholy thing”

Another time she sent this and only wrote “u” below I was like

🤨

i hope you aren’t the owner of this edit or i’m disowning you

In conclusion we’ve got a good Dazai-Kunikida dynamic😂 Love her so much tho

AND YES AJXNSLXN I SAW THAT- please that’s adorable😂💕 gotta adore the lovely friends who have to deal with our passionate selves😭

Ahh that’s so great🥺 But yeah, make sure you warn her beforehand, it could get really triggering🥺

Omg you MEMORISE THEM TOO? Woah😭 I think the only poem we ever memorised was our national anthem in primary school- But it at least gave you more depth for Blue Bamboo so that’s awesome hehe😌 And that sounds so hard omg😭 But I find that it’s so useful for the brain and comprehension skills too which also sounds awesome :o

And I really enjoy learning about them, yes🥺 When we do them in class, first they let us alone with the original poem, and of course we don’t understand anything because if the poem contains, let’s say, 200 words, only 20-25 of them are still in use today. In fact, there was a certain point in the history where we started to use so so many words from two other languages (not telling them explicitly because that’d probably publicly reveal a lot about mine🥲but anyone who knows a bit about this certain literature has already understood it so RIP) because the poets thought those words would serve better to express what they wanted to express, and the mixture of these 3 languages formed the literature language in the country for a long time. We’re talking about roughly from the 11th to the 19th century, by the way. But in the 20th century, a movement started and its main goal was to eliminate the influence of the foreign languages on our literature, they defended that we should be creating our works with our modern language (which I pretty much agree with).

So now, when we look at a poem from for example 17th century, we don’t understand it not only because it’s written in old language but also because it’s not even in our language. But when the teachers give us the translation, it allows me to see how they perceived the world, the human emotions, and it kind of makes me feel a beautiful connection with my country in those centuries, I guess? The awareness that it’s my culture is so attractive for me as well. When I read things from other cultures, sure I like them objectively very much, but here, subjective emotions come into play too, I suppose? It makes me feel closer to it even when I don’t understand a word in it. I always feel like emotions were purer back then. And when I have a version of it which I understand, it makes me rejoice so much. So I may say that it kind of creates the connection between us, the ‘modern’ individuals and the ‘historical’ culture/people. I really hope this all makes sense haha, this turned out so long omg I’m so sorry😖

And yes!! I’m pretty fluent in it, and I really enjoy learning it so, SO much omg it could be my favourite language to learn or talk or write in. I’m literally so passionate about everything about it (why are we like this in everything we do I swear-). And oh you studied it too?? That’s awesome!!🥰 We could try talking in it some time if you’d like👀

And aaaaahhh French literature is AWESOME you should definitely give it a try. It’s definitely among my favourites, if not the favourite. I recently read La Bête Humaine (The Beast Within? The Human Beast?? I still don’t know how it was published in English) from Émile Zola and I was shook oh god, it was so raw, so wild… and I found it really beautiful, I’m honestly slowly falling in love with the naturalism movement. I really recommend Flaubert too, he’s really a master of realism, I love him so much. Hugo, if you’re into romanticism (which I’m.. pretty much not😭) And there’s Molière, the comedy master, I’m honestly HEAD OVER HEELS in love with his witty humour; and in terms of philosophy there’s Rousseau, Descartes, Beauvoir; AND OH THE POEMS Baudelaire, Rimbaud, Verlaine AAAAAA THE LIST COULD GO ON FOR HOURS- I- I CAN’T😩😩😩

And French classical music/art movements is a WHOLE other topic that I won’t even get into, or this ask will become a novel.

Anyways🤭 Oh I see! That’s really interesting, maybe🤔 I also heard that it was so beautiful, I’m looking forward to reading it some time😌

This is long overdue and this ask has been sitting in my ask box for a while, my apologies. And please that picture, I'm sorry I can't help but burst out laughing when I see it hahaha. And to be in the face of such a genius such as Mozart, I would be shy too honestly😳

And yes omg, I appreciate her so much T^T. My friend has been busy though it seems, she's been busy with courses, I miss her😭. And yes ahh I did warn her no worries, I warn her everytime she talks about it😳 I think she gets the point by now haha

And ahh that's actually pretty cool! But that also sounds so complicated at the same time. I can't even begin to imagine having 3 languages integrated into a single type of literature. And only that little of the words can actually be understood? I- wow😳 And yeah, I can totally understand the movement and its intentions, and honestly, I agree with it too, even though I have a very limited understanding of this topic.

And that must feel really weird :0 to know that it is from your culture but to have languages that you don't understand in it. And don't worry, I get what you mean! It's like you're able to communicate with the people of the past as they bring you messages and lessons that they learnt! T^T and it's honestly kind of a treasure honestly.

From what I know the old Chinese language changed to the current one during the May Fourth Movement (Also known as the New Cultural Movement), I believe. Of course, the May Fourth Movement included more than just the change of the languages, but that might be one of its biggest accomplishments. So during that time, the modern Chinese language is already used in speaking and writing as well during that time, but it was not the language used to officially spread ideas during that time. The May Fourth Movement one about moving away from traditional ideas and intellectual thoughts, such as Confucianism. Don't take my word for it, but from what I remember that I have learnt, I think that they wanted to do so because they (the students of the time) believe that it was such ideas that lead to China's downfall after the first world war in the Paris Peace Conference in which it wasn't able to claim some of its original lands back (the land is the Shandong region, which was given to Japan instead); and before that as well in which it suffered much humiliation from the weak Qing (or in English would sometimes be written as Ch'ing) government. And so, this movement kind of promoted the use of vernacular language in writing rather than using what we call "bahuai". This made the written language much easier to understand.

Sorry, I just went on rambling and gave you a history lesson there😅 At first I was going to talk about it briefly only because of... but all well, I guess my history-loving side came out haha

And honestly, I find that so amazing:") And well yeah, I only know very little French, unfortunately... I was learning it when the pandemic hit and I couldn't have any more lessons sadly...

And please, your passion for French literature is making me want to read them too ahh. There are just so many books I want to read gshsjs. And Rousseau, of course, I know him from studying the French Revolution period before haha, along with Voltaire and Montesquieu. Well I know of them, but I'm not very familiar with their ideas though unfortunately :")

And please don't worry Req haha, your passion is very energizing and it makes me really excited to talk about such things too. I enjoy it very much <3

Oh and before we were talking about I am A Cat, I actually found it in the bookstore in Chinese, and I read the description of it briefly and it talks about a story written from the cat's pov which is quite cool!

[jordanshenessy]

Ten questions:

Rules answer ten questions, then to write ten questions of your own & tag other people

@earthling-isa @stoffans just gonna do your questions here

Sarah’s questions:

#1 What would be the most fitting for you: the sun, the moon or the stars?

The MOON. 🌙🌙It’s so pretty and I’m oddly attracted to its aura. It seems lonely in the night sky and sometimes I am too 

#2 Where have you felt incredibly out of place?

Umm, I guess like whenever I’m in really big groups and everyone already has established friendships and i’m just like there like 👁👄👁

Also going to family friend gatherings bc everyone makes fun of me for not fully understanding our language and im still sitting there like 👁👄👁

#3 What are the moments in life that make you realize life isn't all that bad?

I think when my family sits down together and we are all laughing and having a fun time teasing each other and it’s all in good fun and it makes me realize how much we love each other (these are VERY briefs moments tho haha)

#4 Which song makes you feel like you're floating on a cloud?

Dream glow - BTS and charli XCX

#5 Sunset or sunrise?

Sunset. But if I’m being honest both make me feel really anxious I think cuz it’s prayer time and I like can’t sit and EnJoY

#6 Do you like it when people do stuff for you without telling you?

OMG it’s the best feeling ever! irl my friend would like staple reports for me or like make sure to hand in my stuff in class (like we’re in the class) if i’m like busy and physically can’t get up to give it (this is really subtle and idk how to explain what i mean lol) and on here @snorbs i mentioned i liked parallels and you made a gifset for me without me asking ily💕 and @sanabakkoushd​ you made a gifset for my birthday and at that point no one had ever made a gifset for me i was sooo happy omggg ily💕

#7 Did you ever cheat on your tests in school?

nope. except for those ones in middle school where we had a substitute teacher and the whole class was cheating and the substitute would be like completely aware and not even say anything lol

#8 Could you take care of a plant or would it die instantly?

I think it would die instantly. The only reason all the plants in our house survive is bc my mom and dad are soooo into plants. I love plants too but I’m so forgetful about watering 🙈

#9 Do you think you're a difficult person?

I think maybe in some ways I am. I’m a pretty easy person to get along with mainly cuz I just mold easily to others. But I feel like of you hang around irl for longer, you’d see I’m very stubborn about some things. idk lol

#10 Give me one word to describe yourself

Tranquil

Lyka’s questions: 

1. What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?

None of them luv hehe

2. What are you good at but you wish you weren’t?

ouuu i actually don’t know. Maybe like cleaning?? bc then every one asks me to clean sbdbjdj

3. What do you need to have in your garden (if/when you have one)?

hydrangeas, we some in our front lawn😌

4. 2000s or 2010s?

oof i wanna say 2010s, that was a wild ride, I was literally too young in the 2000s

5. What’s the worst lie you’ve ever told?

Probably all the ones where I use my mom as an excuse to not go out or do stuff dhdjdjjj sorry mom

6. At this moment, do you want to be older or younger?

younger. always will pick youth bc im scared of getting older hehe

7. Men?

who? Lmaoo but I mean yes the valid ones anyways

8. What’s your favorite movie franchise?

Why is marvel the only thing coming up in my mind even tho I can’t stand it sometimes lmaooo

9. How did Jens Stoffels figure out to use toothpaste...?

Lykaaaaaa shjdfksjd lets ask @jensrolt for that one lmaooo

10. Do you like to write? (Not a story just normal writing like notes for class and stuff)

um i like study notes but they take so long for me to make and also they have to be a subject i like so like anything in biotech or genetics or human anatomy

[bormst]

cape god - allie x

album review

being young has its ups and downs. on one hand, the real pressures of life have not presented themselves quite yet. you are expected to be simply enjoy living and being a kid before true the hardship (ironically put considering the subject matter of this album) and horrors of being a human step into the light, as they inevitably do. On the other, they are the most confusing years we navigate. Identity, emotions, puberty, what it takes to find and hold onto one’s own sense of self. This often easier said than done. We experiment, sex, drugs, rock and roll (fuck yea) and do what it takes for not only others to like who we present ourselves to be, but for us to like ourselves as well. speaking from experience, as well as the shared experiences of many, the ages of 16-25 are an entirely much too confusing whirl. the soul searching cuts deep, whether we are aware of it or not, for better or for worse. this is incredibly evident in the mystery-shrouded land of cape god. 

the second, full length studio album, cape god, from canadian songstress allie x (alexandra hughes) is a wildly original and both beautiful and terrifyingly all too real account of a mix of self-preservation AND self-exploration, that takes place within liminal space (named by allie as cape god). Released under twin music, hughes’ label that she holds most of her career under, this record is a 12 track account of the young human and fairly self-reflective experience(s). according to allie x, this is her most personal and proud body of work yet, and boy does it show. NOT to say this record is superior to her other releases (her debut ep collxtion I from 2015 is a pop masterpiece, sorry i am letting my stan show), but this is a standout work among hughes’ discography not only in the sense that she embraces a slightly new (for her, which is still debatable) and highly conceptualized sound of alternative dark-pop, but her ability to tell a story that doesn’t feel superficial or simply trying to appease the commercial world of top 40 radio, cookie cutter pop. it shows now her ability to come and go from cape god as necessary, being more comfortable with who she ism enough to release an entire work based on this confusing time-chunk in her life.

i’ve got to say, one of my favorite cuts from this record is the opening track, fresh laundry. produced by oscar görres and james ghaleb, allie sings of nostalgia and a sense of longing for a time that no longer exists via the scent of freshly cleaned laundry, over rhythmic and crow-calling synths. when this initially was released as the first promotional single for cape god, it took me a while to accept the sudden change in sound and aesthetic choice by allie towards a grungier and more alternative vision. but one day, it clicked. and i was hooked. it makes so much sense for her, looking back at her previous works, her post-ceding (not a word, now it is) ep titled super sunset is unrecognizable in a sense (still very good, check that one out too), and almost feels as though something was holding allie x back from who she wanted to be. and damn i am so happy shes finding her niche. some other great cuts from this record are the (probably pop-iest cut) sarah come home, love me wrong (queer kids unite), featuring my boy troye sivan, and the AMAZING susie save your love, featuring the very talented mitski. also super duper party people is a banger (that bass line are you kidding me??). the tail end of this record really flaunts the emotion of miss x, and she does not hold back, as is hard to do in cape god i could only imagine. In life of the party, almost as a compliment to super duper party people, allie recounts of using substances to be herself around people who unfortunately are not her real friends, and use and abuse the f out of her, but she cannot bring herself to mind, because this attention gives her a purpose and sense of life, regardless of whether she knows it is truly wrong to accept the way she is being treated. while this track isn’t my favorite sonically, it is important. the repetition of the chorus meant to burn into the listeners ear, emphasizing the important to allie of feeling accepted by these equally hurt people projecting their insecurities on this girl who is still finding herself. (allie, i hope you don’t vibe with those people anymore :/ ). In madame x, i am taking a shot in the dark when i say i ~believe~ it is about drugs, and the comfort they bring, NOT the madonna album of the same title (hehe, a gorgeous track nonetheless). 

i think we all have our own cape god, somewhere in our brains, and this record is an interesting look into how one individual (miss allie x) is still dealing with and tweaking the psyche we control a meat suit with, in the dreamscape liminal world we all possess (at least, I know i do). This record is very smart. is it commercial? not in the slightest. but it is beautiful and raw and for me, does exactly what music is suppose to do, be that vessel. allie once said in a promotional video for this album that these this is the music she could never quite find the words for, AND IM SO HAPPY SHE DID. personal biases aside as an admitted allie x fan of a hot ass second, this is a crazy original work that scares, delights, and intrigues me. she also released some SICK visuals for this era, check it the fuck out, you will not be disappointed. 

cape god - allie x 4/5 stars

-bormst

[jojosfluffyadventure]

Relax (Mikitaka Hazekura x Jolie)

You asked for it for some reason, and so here it is :’D Under the cut because I’m shy-

(Hypnosis is heavily involved, but it is sfw)

"Shh..." Jolie whispers to her extraterrestrial lover, stroking his hair as he lays on her, his ear pressed to her chest. "You were so tense... hehe, you know you need to relax for this, right?"

A small sigh escapes Mikitaka's soft lips. "I do know... I was just excited to be subject to your hypnosis. I-"

"It's ok..~ I'm not upset, Miki." She smiles, leaning down and kissing his forehead. "Just leave everything to me now."

He nods silently, re-closing those vibrant green eyes of his. His ear twitches slightly with the beat of her heart beneath her soft breast. Though he never could explain or describe it, her heartbeat was such a comforting sound... the longer he listened, the calmer he felt.

The redhead runs her fingers through his long hair one more time. Her heart melts at the sight of him, so relaxed and comfortable. Running her hand down to his chest, she can feel him purring. "How do you feel, Miki? Are you comfortable?"

"Yes, I am.." He opens his eyes, glancing up at her. He has a dreamy smile on his face. Much more relaxed than he had been at first. He had been so laser-focused in his eagerness and anticipation, they hadn't been getting anywhere.

Of course, she had appreciated the intentions. He was always so earnest with her. But now...

She strokes his hair, and leans down to place one more kiss to his lips, pulling something out of her pocket. "Good... You're doing so well now, Miki." she holds up the object, letting one end of it fall from her hand, revealing a crystal pendulum. Her grey eyes shine when she notices his eyes moving from her face to the crystal. "I can't do what you can with my eyes... so I'll be using this." Jolie spins the end of the chain between her fingers slowly, causing the crystal to spin, glinting and shining as it catches the light.

"A mineral sample..?" Mikitaka blinks, staring at the pendulum. "Am I meant to stare at it?"

"Yes, but don't tense or focus." Jolie's other hand moves back to his hair, petting him lovingly. "Just stay relaxed, and watch it... you see how pretty it is?"

"Yes... it is a beautiful sample."

She strokes his hair again. "Notice the way it catches the light, how the light moves inside of it... it's enchanting, isn't it?"

"Yes, I... want to keep watching it."

She moves the hand holding the pendulum, beginning to swing it a little. "The longer you watch it, the easier it is to watch it. Don't you think?"

"Yes.." His hair is stroked once more. " It's fascinating how it interacts with light..."

She swings the crystal ever so slightly wider. "In fact... isn't it becoming hard to take your eyes off of it?" This time, she strokes his hair before he answers.

"Yes.. yes, it is..!" He reacts with delayed, somewhat lazy surprise as he tries for a moment to look away, finding it very difficult. So he continues to watch it as he was told., back and forth, back and forth...

The swing of the pendulum widens. "But you don't mind... you want to effortlessly watch it swing, watch the light, watch the shine, let it draw your eyes... don't you?" Jolie strokes his hair once more, it's the moment of truth for this suggestibility test.

"Yes..?" He replies without even thinking, his mind having linked her gentle pets with the response of 'yes'. He's almost a bit surprised to hear his response prior to even thinking about giving it. But it's true, right now, he finds that he doesn't want to look away even in the slightest.

A relieved smile crosses Jolie's lips. "Good... my angel, as you watch it swing, it pulls your eyes towards it. You don't even need to move your eyes by yourself, the pendulum does that for you. And so you can start to relax even more.."

His hair is stroked. "Yes.." He replies, beginning to feel a little bit limp against his love. What she said is true. The crystal is pulling his eyes to its curved swing... he feels like he doesn't even need to try the smallest bit.

She can feel him growing heavier against her as he relaxes more deeply. "Now... Miki, what you'll find is that as you stare at the crystal, it isn't only pulling your eyes. It's beginning to pull thoughts from your mind. Thought, after thought, after little thought, being pulled out, into the crystal, into the light."

He blinks, a look of momentary confusion passing over his face.

"Little thoughts, big thoughts, every thought, being pulled out, pulled by the crystal, into the crystal... and slowly, it gets harder for you to think."

The alien's thoughts start to grind to a halt, as there are less and less thoughts for him to have. His expression grows more and more blank the longer he stares, his lips parted slightly in an increasingly thoughtless daze.

"And now, your last thought is pulled out, and safely inside the crystal... I will put your thoughts back in your head when we're done, but for now... all of your thoughts are safe inside the crystal."

Mikitaka's eyes mindlessly follow the pendulum now. He can hear her voice, but he can't consciously process what she's saying. He can see the crystal, but he can't think about what's happening.

"If I ask you a question, Miki, you can answer with a yes or a no. Your subconscious will process the question. Do you understand?"

"Yes..."

"Good boy..." She murmurs, her heart throbbing as she stares at him. So vulnerable and blank beneath her now... "Whenever I say 'sleep' and snap my fingers, you will drop back down into this trance state. all your thoughts go into the crystal, and you simply feel floaty and dreamy, so pleasant as you listen to only my voice. Do you understand?"

"Yes.."

"Now, I'm going to count from five to one, waking you, but you will remain in trance. Though you will be alert and aware, you will still obey and listen, as you are now. Do you understand, Miki?"

"Yes..."

"Good." Jolie replies warmly. "Now, Miki, I'm going to bring you up slowly... five, feeling good, feeling relaxed and beginning to wake... four, thoughts slowly returning to your mind from the crystal, waking further... three, feeling calmness wash over your body... two, eyes beginning to open, feeling like you've just had a full good night's rest... and one, wide awake, in a wonderful mood, bright and well rested."

The alien's eyes flutter open again. He's a little dazed for a moment, but when his eyes land on his love's face, his soft smile returns to his expression. "Jolie... did I already go under..? how did I do?" He asks softly, eager to find out if he was able to live up to her expectations.

"You were wonderful~" She answers brightly, lowering the pendulum and snuggling him to her chest.

"Really? There were no troubles?" He asks, his ears perking up. "I was not too tense?"

"No. This time, you went right under." The redhead kisses his temple. "You were so receptive, it was amazing~"

"I am happy I could be your first subject... thank you for asking me if I would like to... ...." As a thought occurs to him, his cheeks and the tips of his ears turn a light green as he blushes. "... we didn't... do anything, did we?" He asks tentatively. "For if we did, I... would like to be able to remember it."

Her cheeks steadily turn pink when he asks his question. "N-no, we didn't do anything... yet..."

"Yet...?"

"... Miki, is there anything you don't want me to do with you with hypnosis?"

"Ah...? No, not that I can think of from the things that you may do with me... why? We are already finished. Are you asking for future reference?"

"... do you want to be done for tonight?"

"... not particularly... I was hoping that you may do whatever your heart desired. Considering... that I have done the same before.."

"Then... is it ok if I keep going?"

"..." Mikitaka nods. "Yes, but... I thought you were done...?" His eyes seem to glimmer with anticipation, becoming excited at the prospect of more to come.

Jolie shakes her head, and snaps her fingers. "Sleep."

Her alien boyfriend slumps over again immediately, his eyelids fluttering halfway shut.

"My space angel... we're not done." She gently shifts his position, and places a tender kiss to his lips, his cool breath hitting her cheek when she pulls away. "Thank you.. I promise I'll let you remember everything."

[seromreven]

title: i’ll take you there | chapter four.

pairing: john lennon/female!reader | paul mccartney/female!reader/linda mccartney, (mentioned).

summary: the year is 1974. You’re the personal assistant of Paul and Linda McCartney. One spring day you meet the rather infamous John Lennon during the middle of his ‘Lost Weekend’ escapades. Spark fly and secrets unfold between the two of you.

author’s note: dfghjkl. look! i hadn’t forgotten about the story! i recommend finding the links to the previous chapters in my masterlist if you’re new to the story | next chapter will be short(er) but, hehe, it’ll be worth it- trust me.

---

You spent the hours leading up to your solitary meeting with John drinking in your room. Drinking a lot. Drinking whatever of tiny bottles that could be found the mini fridge and then moving on to ordering a large amount of alcohol with some snacks that paled in comparison. Now, you weren’t getting completely wasted. You had to have your mind with you when you met up with John, but it had been enough for you to get some false courage and the mind to get a cab ride to his place of residence. And so you got dressed in one of the few clean dresses you still had left; you had really failed so far on the laundry front of the vacation, but it suited nicely for the… get-together. Neither too formal nor casual, just enough of either for the occasion. You laid on your stomach on the bed, watching the minutes fly by till your car ride arrived. 

You spend the ride muttering to yourself at the gall of May and of your disbelief in the situation. What was the point of this? What was her goal in this? Did she want the two of you to… hook up? Did John really want that too? Did you want it? You took a large swig of the tiny vodka bottle you had stuffed down your bra as you neared John’s ridiculous rented house. The large beach estate seemed looming and threatening as you exited and tripped out of the taxi, you made sure to throw more than enough cash at the driver before inching closer to the building that emerged over the pale moonlight, dwarfing you with its size. Now the sober part of your mind knew it really weren’t all that large, (you had seen it before!), but the drunk mind- the mind in charge- disagreed with that logical thought.

You hammered on the door with great speed as you felt the March evening air wrap its chill claws around you. “Helloo,” you called out as you continued knocking obnoxiously on the smooth wood. You steadied yourself the best you could on the blurred and moving ground as you readied yourself for the inevitable drama that were to follow the door opening. It was as if in slow motion as you watched the door open up to reveal John. Standing there, he looked down on you from over his glasses, his hair frayed and curling at its edges, with a glass of something golden in hand; he stepped aside to let you in with a smirk. “May told me you’ll come,” he said as he closed the door behind him.

The house looked the same as it did the previous day and just that very morning, (which was no surprise, really), but there was something different about it. Some large and domineering sensation that crawled on the edges of your mind; not fright- you weren’t scared, but there was something that sent shivers of anxiety up your spine as you watched John walk around you and towards what you knew to be the living room. (Fuck, he smelled nice). You hadn’t felt like this since… well, since you first met Paul and Linda. That presence of love and wonder building in your chest, choking you as it grew its way up your throat. You shook your head at the thought; you weren’t in love with John. Ridiculous! You just met the guy! And, besides… besides you had Paul and Linda! Screw what they had told you of the freedom you have to find your own person and a life of your own! You were content with your lot in life!

You finally noticed John staring at you from the living room couch with a narrow eyes, raised brows, and questioning look on his face. The open fireplace illuminated him quite nicely in the dim lighting of the room. Shaking your head, you mumbled some nonsense to yourself and almost tripped over your own feet in your hurry to get into the same room as your bespectacled host. You took an unnecessary large step over the threshold to the new room and heard him laugh; something that sent electrifying sparks through your spine, making you bump right into a weird nondescript statue in your distraction. You managed to save it, though looking at it, you wish you hadn’t. God, it was ugly.

“Whoopsie,” you laughed and placed the… thing back into its proper place. You turned around to find him sitting in the long, hard looking couch that he had been standing up against when you waltzed in and made a fool of yourself. It was… not far different from how everything in house looked. Bleak and uncomfortable. Hadn’t he told you a friend of his decorated the place? He didn’t seem the type to hang out with sorts with those kinds of… taste. Nevertheless, you weren’t in a place to judge and so you flopped down very ungracefully on the identical couch opposite him, only separated by an expensive-looking glass table between the two of you. “So,” you began with a sigh, not knowing what you were about to say. “...So,” he copied with a smirk you didn’t know whether to like or detest. You felt none of your usual nervosities or social boundaries made by your anxieties (thanks, alcohol!) and felt a rush of something you had never quite felt before. You bit your lip and asked what laid heavy on your mind; “what am I doing here? Like... why?”

His eyebrows furrowed in the small pause that followed your question before he answered, “May told me you wanted to come and visit.”

“What!” You couldn’t control yourself and shot up from your seat, swaying as your legs tried to follow your quick movement. “She told me you wanted me here!”

He stood up, much more carefully than what you had, with a chuckle and his dark eyes focused on you and your muttering self. Curses fell loosely from your lips as you paced around wondering about the situation you had landed yourself in this time. May seemed to have a good grasp of things. You knew you had figured out her plan in getting you to his place but sure had been a round-about way she had gone about it. She was more shrewd than you had realised and, well, you couldn’t help but admire that. Even if it had given you a confusing few minutes before you realised it really weren’t all that big a deal. You turned back to John, locking eyes with the singer; “got any booze?”

“Of course,” he said with a wide grin and lead you towards a cabinet near the entrance that connected the living room with the kitchen.

You stood hovering in his immediate presence as you watched him pour two glasses of Japanese malt whiskey, the foreign letters looking strange as ever in your intoxicated mind. You looked closely at the bottle over his shoulder, trying to read the language you did not know, but he seemed not to mind as he continued pouring, his slender fingers wrapped around the glass in such a way that send thoughts through your mind that you would have shunned away immediately only hours prior. You tiptoed around as he turned and turned in his attempt to get past you; he seemed amused by your antics. You finally stepped aside with a laugh and gleefully accepted the fine whiskey glass as it were handed to you. “Cheers,” he said with a charming smile and you took a sip from the whiskey, excited to taste the Japanese variant you had never seen before.

You finished the glass quicker than he; your nerves still lingering at the edges of your mind, urging you on to drink and drink till you no longer felt their phantom restraints. You shuddered as the last of the liquor slid down your throat and licked your lips tenderly to get the last few drops that remained. You found him watching you intensely and then you found yourself winking- winking. What were you doing! He chuckled and moved towards the couch; you faithfully trailed along behind him, this time sitting next to him rather than a mile or two away. And, well, you were sitting rather close to him too. You were unsure what really made it happen, the alcohol or whatnot, but something in your brain had surely snapped as you looked upon him with a strong urge to just… to just grab him. And if you hadn’t terribly misjudged, by all appearances he felt the same. 

You tried to start a conversation, to distract from the warm feelings coming over you like a blanket or a cup of hot cocoa on a snowy day. You mentioned the previous day; Stevie Wonder, Harry Nilsson and lastly… Paul. The subject of… him were one you were careful and a tad… nervous about. But they had seemed to go with ease about it the day previous. No signs of the hard breakup that you had otherwise heard so much about, (mostly from the tabloids and who were to say if most of that had even been trustworthy). But you had seen Paul on both good days, and bad, and you knew that the end of the swinging sixties still had a hard hold on him.

John seemed… very interested in your connection to Paul. You knew he was well aware that you worked for him and Linda but he seemed to suspect something else were going on, though he didn’t let you on to the fact but you could sense it in the way he asked certain questions. Mentioned women he had seen Paul with in their ‘youth’ and how he acted around them. You were sure he were making connections there, and you did not like it. You wanted to diverge. You needed to diverge. You couldn’t let him suspect anything. You weren’t sure of the repercussions of him finding out but you weren’t about to experience it! You need to be smooth about it. Cracking your neck, you stretched out your arms in a fake yawn, “oh, will you look at the time, my my,” and went to carefully place your hands folded in your lap when you, on your way down from the stretching heights you had let your hands go on, knocked down the whiskey glass John were still holding. Thankfully, it was empty, but it shattered on the hardwood floor and the shimmering crystal spread out over the smooth flooring; reminding you of sugar or sparkling snow. “Shit,” you cursed in unison and knocked your heads together as you leaned forward to look at the mess scattered around your feet.

You groaned and leaned back into the couch, holding a hand on your throbbing forehead. God, what a mess (and distraction!) you made. You had to take the victory with the pain; you supposed. 

You came over your mild pain and shock while watching him tut around the bright room, broom and dustpan in hand as he hurried away again with the sprinkles of glass resting on it. He reappeared, hands free and his hair a curling mess around his square jaw; you muttered curses to yourself, after yet again getting dragged into his sparkling eyes. He came to stand in front of you in the time you were scolding yourself and you blinked at him, not knowing what he was planning to do as he just… stood there, in front of you where the cascade of broken glass had once laid. He came closer, and closer, ‘till he finally where close enough for you to smell the alcohol on his breath and the whiffs of cologne hanging around him. You felt your heartbeat in your throat as his lips gingerly touched yours and you felt electrifying sparks at the velvety touch, and you continued to completely melt into it; forgetting all that hounded you all day, letting this new sensation overflow you as he slowly sat down next to you, dragging you along as the kiss deepened.

[skyhopedango]

2019 fall anime preview

I’m not one of those people who whine and complain about The State Of Anime Today, being all doom and gloom about The Future of the Industry, pointing at certain shows and phenomena going “see that is what is wrong with anime today!” as if they were being all objective and factual, even though the real reason is simply that there’s fewer shows they enjoy than shows that they don’t. I think that’s silly. I’ve been watching anime since the ‘90s, I’ve seen trends come and go, I have no illusions about The Good Old Times, and how Back Then things were so much better. News flash, they weren’t. They were just different. Sometimes more shows were my cup of tea than in other times. And of course my own taste wasn’t entirely the same as it is now, and I used to be less discerning in what I watched. (This evolution of one’s taste is something a lot of complainers fail to take into account, by the way.)

Also, pretending to have an objective perspective on what is bad or worthless is just doing it wrong, I think? I mean, I don’t give a shit about the "I Was Reborn As The Main Character In My Favorite RPG Where I Get All The Wishfulfilment Shit I’m Missing IRL” genre, or the “cute anime girls doing funny/heartwarming stuff” genre, but hey, a lot of people genuinely enjoy these shows so... yeah? they’re clearly not worthless to those people. Similarly, I didn’t care for Yuuri on Ice, and its fandom annoyed the hell out of me, but again, so many people were genuinely enthusiastic about it and found it inspiring and whatnot, it was a runaway hit, etc. Am I supposed to pretend that somehow everyone else was doing it wrong? I’ll grouse and complain about how bad I find a show, but it’s still a subjective thing; me not liking something doesn’t, in and of itself, mean it is objectively worthless and it shouldn’t exist.

All that said... wow, man, had the recent seasons been utter crap for me. So many shows, and yet so few that I found interesting and worth spending time on. Winter? Gah. Spring? Utter crap. Summer? I started the season with a decent list, and the next thing I know I’m watching only three shows, and am only really into one of them. So yeah. Fall has some shows I’d been interested in for a while so I really hope they’ll live up to my expectations, but... at this point I’m not holding my breath, hehe.

Vinland Saga: Continuing with this one, duh.

Dr. Stone: On the fence about this one. I actually dropped it as of now because, as I predicted, without Tsukasa I just don’t really care about the rest. But I may check out the conclusion of the Tsukasa storyline.

Fairy Gone: I’ll check out the second cour to see if it had improved in the meantime, but it’s not very likely so... I’ll probably drop it after an episode or two.

As for the new shows...

Blade of the Immortal: I’ve never been particularly enthusiastic about this manga, but eh, why not give the show a try. It’s going to be the reviewers’ darling, anyway.

Beastars: I haven’t read the manga, but I heard good things about it, so I might as well check out the anime. Also it has a large following in certain circles that makes me assume that there’s some m/m content or at least shippiness? idek.

Kabukichou Sherlock: Now we’re talking! I’ve been keeping an eye on this ever since it was announced, and I’m very much looking forward to it! It looks really fun so I hope it’ll deliver.

Tokunana: Another one I’d been following for a while now. It doesn’t look like it’s going to change the world or anything, and I’m not too hot on the dark-haired main character (he looks way too ~wow so cool~ for my taste) but regardless, this show has some promise to entertain me. At worst it might be cute.

Mairimashita! Iruma-kun: I’ve read a bit of the manga for this, and it’s one of those series which are pretty cookie-cutter and ultimately forgettable, but from what I’ve read so far, it might have just enough charm to make me like it and keep up with it.

Babylon: I only became aware of this one’s existence a few days ago, and as noted at the time, it seems interesting but it’s by the same dude who did Kado, which started out great and then just... somehow turned into complete garbage. So I wonder how this one’s going to fare, I hope a lot better.

Bananya S2: ARE YOU EVEN ASKING? It’s Bananya! Banana kitties! Of course I’ll watch it!

Africa no Salaryman: Another one that has to screw up really bad for me not to like it. Office slave animals, how can this go wrong!

[wildflowerrambles]

100 Questions

I was tagged by the lovely @super-strange-sons. Thanks so much, Chels! I adore you! <3

This is a long one so grab a snack. Probably quite a few things you didn’t know about me.

I’m tagging anyone who would like to do this! Tag me in it because I want to see. :)

1. What is your nickname? Sav or Vannah on occasion & Cubbie by my parents (gotta love ‘em).

2. How old are you? 23.

3. What is your birth month? December.

4. What is your zodiac sign? Sagitarius.

5. What is your favorite color? Lavender.

6. What’s your lucky number? Not particularly lucky but I like 4, 8, & 13.

7. Do you have any pets? Sadly, my cat died this morning. We do have another cat though.

8. Where are you from? Mississippi.

9. How tall are you? 5′3”.

10. What shoe size are you? 6 and a half.

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? Probably 20+ - I love shoes.

12. Are you random? Absolutely.

13. Last person you texted? My mom.

14. Are you psychic in any way? Negative.

15. Last TV show watched? Grey’s Anatomy.

16. Favorite movie? Beauty & the Beast (the animated one).

17. Favourite show from your childhood? Franklin. Anything Disney Channel. Throwbacks like PB & J Otter, Roly Poly Oly, etc.

18. Do you want children? Possibly one day.

19. Do you want a church wedding? Not really. I would rather get married in a forest.

20. What is your religion? Christian!

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? Yes, for family.

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? I got a ticket once for going under a yellow light that turned red. Does that count?

23. How is life? It has its ups and downs, but overall - much more positive than in the past. :)

24. Baths or showers? I typically shower, but I love a good bath.

25. What color socks are you wearing? Currently not wearing any.

26. Have you ever been famous? Not even kinda.

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? I think it would be so much fun to perform/play shows, but I like being able to do my own thing without being under a magnifying glass.

28. What type of music do you like? Rock, blues, indie, pop - just about anything with the exception of country.

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? Nope.

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? I have three, but I really only use one for sleeping.

31. What position do you usually sleep in? Stomach or curled up on my side.

32. How big is your house? Along the smaller side of average..?

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? Right now I’m stuck on oatmeal with peanut butter & honey.

34. Have you ever left the country? Nope.

35. Have you ever tried archery? Nope.

36. Do you like anyone? Not anyone who knows I exist, l o l

37. Favorite swear word? Y’know, I don’t really swear irl.

38. When do you fall asleep? As of lately, it’s been around 11 - 12.

39. Do you have any scars? Some tiny ones but nothing too noticeable.

40. Sexual orientation? Straight.

41. Are you a good liar? I would say so, hehe oops

42. What languages would you like to learn? I wanted to learn Korean, but I’m not really sure.

43. Top 10 songs? Oh gosh. This is always changing. Music is my passion. Anything Hozier, 5SOS, Shawn Mendes, Astrid S, Billie Eilish, so many more.

44. Do you like your country? It is what it is. I can’t complain too much haha.

45. Do you have friends from the web? Yes! They’re some of my very favorite people. <3

46. What is your personality type? I’m rather quiet and often seen as shy. I’m laid back and open about most things. Most people probably would say I’m nice and positive (or I hope).

47. Hogwarts House? I’m honestly not sure.

48. Can you curl your tongue? Yep.

49. Pick one fictional character you can relate to? My first thought was Jessica Day.

50. Left or right handed? Right.

51. Are you scared of spiders? Terrified.

52. Favorite food? I enjoy most foods.

53. Favorite foreign food? Tacos. But again, I eat most foods.

54. Are you a clean or messy person? Clean.

55. If you could switch your gender for a day, what would you do? Be a good ole boy & do what they do.

56. What color underwear? Pink & gray.

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? Depends, but an average of 30 - 40 mins.

58. Do you have much of an ego? No.

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? Suck.

60. Do you talk to yourself? Don’t we all?

61. Do you sing to yourself? Yes. More often than not.

62. Are you a good singer? Yes…?

63. Biggest Fears? Spiders, heights, large bodies of water, the unknown.

65. Are you a grammar nazi? I can be.

66. Do you have long or short hair? Short!

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? I’d probably have to write them down, but I could do it.

68. Favorite school subject? I think I was best at English and math. I enjoyed psychology in college.

69. Extrovert or Introvert? Introvert.

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? Nope.

71. What makes you nervous? New opportunities, especially if I don’t know what to expect.

72. Are you scared of the dark? I certainly don’t enjoy it.

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? Depends - sometimes.

74. Are you ticklish? Yep.

75. Have you ever started a rumor? Not intentionally.

76. Have you ever been out of your home country? Nope.

77. Have you ever drank underage? Nope.

78. Have you ever done drugs? I tried weed once, if that counts.

79. What do you fantasize about? I feel my tumblr speaks for itself, especially my personal one.

80. How many piercings do you have? 4 in my ears, and I had my cartilage pierced but the hole closed.

81. Can you roll your R’s? I can.

82. How fast can you type? Reasonably fast.

83. How fast can you run? I don’t enjoy running & will only do it if something is after me.

84. What color is your hair? Brown/reddish.

85. What color are your eyes? Blue.

86. What are you allergic to? Nothing that I’m aware of.

87. Do you keep a journal? Eh, no.

88. Are you depressed about anything? Depression has been a struggle for me, but I always try to stay positive. :)

89. Do you like your age? Sure, why not.

90. What makes you angry? It takes a good bit to get me fired up, so I can’t really think of anything particular off the top of my head.

91. Do you like your own name? Sure, why not.

92. Did you ever get a foreign object up your nose? Not that I know of, but who knows what I did as a child.

93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child? I would like one of each - no particular order.

94. What talents do you have? Singing, dancing, a few enjoy what I write. I’m pretty creative & “good” at several things, but not really outstanding at anything.

95. Sun or moon? Both.

96. How did you get your name? My parents liked it. Not sure there’s really any story behind it.

97. Are you religious? I am.

98. Have you ever been to a therapist? Currently no, but it’s something I’ve looked into a good bit lately.

99. Color of your bedspread? Pale yellow.

100. Color of your room? Beige.

[bloggong]

Take #2 on Post-Modernism

Okay, photo kinda unrelated but healthy reminder.

Wowza, what are these regular updates on this tumblr huh?

Anyway, today was Day 1 of YF camp, and as usual our camp speaker Greg already put out a few absolute bangers (apart from endorsing Mr Shai Linne ofc).

I find it interesting that as of late, more and more church messages and sermons have been centered around the danger of subjective truth. I remember my Church Pastor addressing it a while back, and even before him, I can vividly recall Paul Washer talking about it as well. Effectively, whether the rebuttal arises from the post-modernist's refusal to accept the presence of irrefutable absolute truth, or from the unwillingness to submit to an ultimate authority which governs their decision-making, their worldview crumbles into irrationality and darkness (Wow harsh words but I'm sure Paul and the other apostles were as, if not more harsh).

Anyway, the reason why I am writing this post as I take 176 to West Coast Park is because of something Greg spoke about on Day 1 of YF Camp. In addressing the need to discern the truth, alongside the need to recognize that there is 1 truth, Greg cut to the heart of a topic I have been getting into as of late , namely, presuppositional apologetics.

Presuppositional apologetics (or presupp, for the cool kids), is an apologetic method coined by one Cornelius Van Til. Such an apologetic originated from Van Til's rejection of the other methods of defending the faith that he was presented with, (the evidentialist argument, creator-creation argument etc), a rejection arising from the notion that such apologetic placed the unbeliever as the "Judge", with "God" being put on trial.

In his rejection of said methods, Van Til acknowledged the supremacy of the Word of the immutable almighty God, the Bible, as the absolute standard from which any value judgement or decision must be made. Moreover, another piece of justification for the presuppositional method of defending the faith, one I find very compelling, was Van Til's reference to Romans 1:18. If the unbeliever, is truly as the Bible says, "[suppressing] the truth in unrighteousness", then this means that they already know the truth of Scripture. 

In effect, no men or women who denies the truth is without excuse, for all of nature screams the Glory of God, and attests to the existence of an immutable and loving creator. In this light, the apologist should not put the Sovereign God on 'trial', allowing the unbeliever to decide if the Father is 'real or not'. 

Rather, the apologist should presuppose (hence the name hehe) the truth of the Bible, and seek to prove the existence and legitimacy of the Father and Christ through the daily assumptions the unbeliever makes about reality, since they know God exists, and are rejecting it in unrighteousness. Another thing I appreciate about this apologetic method is its emphasis on the moving power of the Holy Spirit. In true Ephesians 2:8-9 fashion, presupp highlights that only by the grace of God can men be saved, and only the Spirit can sanctify a depraved people.

Romans 1:18 Unbelief and Its Consequences

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness

Alright, now that I've laid out the groundwork of Presuppositional Apologetics, I want to link it back to Greg's talk today. Throughout his talk, I couldn't help but link it back to the unconscious, inconspicuous post-modernism that has seemingly permeated the secular mindset on all levels.

Oh and before I forget, bruh Proverbs 9:10

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.

Something key about presuppositional apologetics is its emphasis on tracing an observation to its root. In other words, it rationalizes every occurrence observable to scripture. To give an example, Van Til would argue that secular morality, logic and axiomatic theory, and an innate sense of justice, are all proof of a transcendent omniscient omnipotent God. In the same strand, presupp forces the apologist to begin their apologetic from the position of every word of the Bible being true. So should the unbeliever question whether they can prove the Bible is real, the response is "Yes I can. The Bible tells me so."

While I can understand the apprehension one might have adopting such an apologetic method, the more you think about it the more it makes sense.

In his book, "Defense of the Faith", Van Til begins by espousing on Ultimate Authority. Whether one is a Christian, an Atheist, a Materialist, a Monotheist, Polytheist, Pantheist, or any other belief system, they unconsciously submit to an ultimate authority. Most of the time such an authority is logic and sense perception, though in some cases it can extend to axioms and morality.

Regardless, the presuppositional apologist takes these assumptions, and points out how without God, they cannot make sense. For the sake of clarification, I will explicate on Morality, especially in the post-modern worldview.

For a post-modern Atheist, they would argue morality is subjective. Should a society or culture advance past a certain point, morality can fluctuate and change with it. In other words, any feelings of injustice exist because of this unspoken shared moral code that everyone agrees on.

The issue here is twofold.

Firstly, for an atheist, morality should not matter. If men really is borne not in the image of an immutable God, but is just a bunch of chemicals, or on a more macro-level, quarks bouncing off each other, then there is no basis for morality. Really, men is just a bunch of chemicals acting a certain way at a certain temperature. In that case, why should one dictate a certain moral action? What differentiates men from a bottle of coca cola that is shaken and opened, with fizz leaking out. If men has no intrinsic value, then why is there even a debate about morality? Arbitrary concepts like right and wrong, which a debate attempts to determine, do not exist if the two debaters are composed of noises concocted by atoms in motion. Some atheists would argue that morality arises from a need for mankind’s self-preservation. Here, the question becomes one of degree. Where does such a rule extend to. If morality is innately understood by every human, yet is entirely subjective, then does this mean that because my morality states that I will kill anyone with squeaky shoes, a squeak from your Converse Sneakers warrants your death?  Evidently that is not how morality works. Morality is not simply composed of two groups of people shouting at each other, with the louder group determining the morality of the system. If men has an awareness that things like murder, sin, and adultery are wrong, but this is not to arise from the presence of a Just God who has placed in every men and women’s heart a notion of his justice, then where does this morality extend to? Even if I can agree that within my family, we share a sense of morality, why should this ethical code extend to those outside my direct sphere of influence? If someone’s long-term longevity is of no direct interest to me, why is it wrong to rob your neighbor? In the same vein, why is it wrong to wage war on other nations should their interests not at all align with mine?  Here, the atheist’s argument for having a coherent moral system completely falls apart. This is what Van Til calls the futility of the non-Christian worldview. In the futility of the Atheistic Worldview, we observe the “impossibility of the contrary”, where in the absence of any other explanation for morality, the Christian worldview can account for one.  Similarly, for the secular Post-Modernist, they are quick to state that while something might be true for them, it does not have to be true for others. In short, subjective truth. This is dangerous for many reasons, but on the logical front, it is self-contradicting. Many Post-Modernists will even admit that they do not know what is ‘true’ for sure. All one has to do to refute the post-modernist is ask them if they know THAT to be true. If the post-modernist cannot claim to know anything to be true, their argument is incoherent and any knowledge claims are inconsistent with their worldview, in which case their worldview likewise crumbles into absurdity. To quote the man, Mr Paul Washer, in his indictment of the post-modern mindset, “either I am right and you are wrong, or you are right and I am wrong, or we are both wrong, but we CANNOT both be right!”

Hopefully through this very brief example, it has become clear (to at least some degree) how the presuppositionalist is to defend the faith. In having a consistent and coherent epistemology, the apologist is to hold up the ultimate authority of the Bible above all other things. Only through this can a logical argument emerge. Yet, and this remains key, regardless of the apologetic one employs to explain the faith, I pray that the a love for the unbeliever, a love that mimics the love of Christ, is what motivates our pleading with them. The apologist is to plead with the unbeliever as one pleads with blinded people in a burning building. While I often times find myself trading blows with others when talking about the faith, especially in using presupp, we have to remember above all, to hold fast to the truth of the gospel, that God became man, and bore the wrath of all who believe, such that they might in grace, find eternal salvation.  Brothers and Sisters, let us encourage each other in the time we have on this earth, that we preach as dying men and women, to dying men and women, that they might in grace and mercy, find the salvation that they know to be true, and know of the sweetness of the gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Matthew 8:1-4 

Jesus Cleanses a Man with Leprosy

When Jesus came down from the mountain, large crowds followed Him. And a man with leprosy came to Him and bowed down before Him, and said, “Lord, if You are willing, You can make me clean.” Jesus reached out with His hand and touched him, saying, “I am willing; be cleansed.” And immediately his leprosy was cleansed. And Jesus said to him, “See that you tell no one; but go, show yourself to the priest and present the offering that Moses commanded, as a testimony to them.”

This might become a running theme, but as usual I’m going to end with an excerpt from Shai Linne’s song “Startling Mystery”

“Sovereign Lord, who can truly understand Your depths? You give us life, You're the source of every man's breath Your mysteries, the sharpest of minds can't guess They stand perplexed, can't fathom what you plan next In the garden, we failed Your command's test We transgressed, now our world is a grand mess Lord, You're perfect, so why should You demand less? Man's best is only a sinking sand quest

But through Christ, watch God saving hand flex Redeemed the people, North, South, East, and West Glorious robes, in the Promised Land, dressed We stand blessed, all because of the Lamb's death 

So as we're liftin' up our praise to You, receive it, Lord The object of our affection, whom we adore Fallen in our misery, You darted into history The pardon of iniquity, startling the mystery

The oceans, the planes, the mountains, the rain The universe proclaims the glory of Your Name And what am I that You called me to Your side? And took this heart of stone and broke it open wide”

Friends, keep each other in prayer, that we walk in a manner that is pleasing to our King. 

Coram Deo 

-Gong 

6:16pm

12 December 2020   

[akemilena]

SolidS Unit Song Series COLOR -RED- drama

COLOR

Translation index || Soliradi

Shiki: Hm...

*leaves room*

Tsubasa: Hm… Oh! There’s an ad of our new CDs in this magazine! The “Beauties of the nature” series!

Rikka: Eh, really?

Tsubasa: Yeah. This. It’s a spread and it sure has impact~

Rikka: Ah, it’s true. Ohh, so in the end they finished up the visual like this. Dai, you too, look.

Dai: Oh. Eh, it’s pretty flashy. The outfits were Japanese-style, so I thought it’d be more solemn.

Tsubasa: Me too. They showed us a rough image before the shooting, but after adding the letters and all, the impression really changes! There are times when I see a poster and think “ah, so in the end it’s like this”.

Dai: There are. Like with this “Beauties of the nature” visual.

Rikka: Hmm… Usually, the visual is finished mostly like the rough image shows… but in our case, in SolidS, our leader and producer makes things as they progress, so…

Tsubasa: *laughs* That’s true. He also does it with songs. In the middle of a recording, he suddenly hums something and goes like “I’ve decided to go with this phrase, so ignore the music score”.

Dai: Also, “I want to raise the last chorus a semitone”, or something.

Tsubasa: Yes yes yes he says that!!

Dai: He wants to try everything he can do.

Tsubasa: Right. I’ve gotten used to his unreasonable requests already, but you know… Geez, that reckless producer. Getting used to it and forgiving him are different things!

Rikka: Ahaha… When it comes to production, Shiki is full of vigour and curiosity, so the things he aims for are always high. He’s very particular. If we think we’re stimulating Shiki’s ambition, I guess it’s nice?

Tsubasa: Rikka, you’re too soft on him.

Rikka: Ehh, you think so?

Dai: You’re indeed soft.

Rikka: Dai, you too? I wonder… so that’s how it looks like… That’s true. Maybe I’m a little soft on him. Shiki used to provide songs for other artists, right? Since it’s an outside order, he can’t do things of his own accord. And there was a time he was rotting away because of that, and I know it well. I think he’s having fun now.

Dai: Hm… Oh, but looking at it again, it’s really flashy.

Tsubasa: Heh, I love the impact it has.

Dai: I bet you do. You’re so easy to read.

Tsubasa: Eh, am I?

Dai: Yeah. You completely love standing out and being the center of attention, right? Really, your personality is made for this kind of industry.

Tsubasa: Hehe, you’re praising me too much, Dai-chan~

Dai: I’m not praising you.

Rikka: *laughs* It’s true that rather than cowering and getting nervous when people look at you, that’s more oriented to this industry. As a photographic subject, it’s ideal.

Tsubasa: I know, right? See, Dai-chan. Rikka is praising me.

Dai: Yeah, yeah. Come on, don’t grow too soft on him too. He’ll get carried away.

*door opens*

Shiki: Hey. Perfect, you’re all together.

Dai: Shiki?

Shiki: Well, since we’re all together, I have a proposal.

Tsubasa: Okay! I’m against anything crazy!

Shiki: Huh? It’s not crazy or anything. Rather, it’s something you’d like.

Tsubasa: Huh? What’s that?

Shiki: Actually, aside from the “Beauties of the nature” series, I was thinking of starting another series of CDs simultaneously.

Dai: Another series?

Shiki: SolidS is doing the “Beauties of the nature” series as solos, right? I’ve been making the songs thinking about the “flower” “bird” “wind” and “moon” applied to every one of us, but…

Rikka: But?

Shiki: It’s kind of annoying to admit it, but since our manager Haiduki is pulling up some of the work at hand sorting it, I have a bit more of time to spare. And that’s why I thought of starting another series, a unit song series where the four of us will sing.

Tsubasa: Ah, so you meant that! More songs! It’s nice!! Increasing our song repertoire is more than welcome!

Rikka: I’m also happy I get to sing more with everyone.

Dai: Me too, I don’t have any objections.

Shiki: I see. Then let’s say there’ll be no problem with the production. I’ll announce officially that we’re increasing our line with another series in tomorrow’s meeting. We have to decide on the promotion plan, after all. I’ll handle that end, so I don’t mind doing it myself, but I want to decide the song’s content, the concept, with everyone.

Rikka: Eh?

Tsubasa: Eh!?!

Dai: Decide it… with everyone?

Tsubasa: E-ehhh did he just say with everyone?? Deciding the new song’s course together?? Not leaving it to the… er… hikikomori producer’s brain’s work like always???

Shiki: Well sorry it’s the work of a hikikomori’s brain.

Tsubasa: Don’t sulk, Shiki!! Not bad, it’s great!!! Working the four of us together!! Being involved in the project since its roots sounds so fun!! Right? Don’t you think so, Dai-chan, Rikka??

Dai: That’s true. Rather than seeing “oh, so this is how it’s finished”, like that ad, I prefer this, personally.

Shiki: Hm. How about you, Rikka?

Rikka: Of course I’m happy too, but I have no knowledge about song composition… will it be fine?

Shiki: That won’t be any problem. It’s just the concept, the course. The motives and images you want to sing or express. If you tell me what you want to do, I’ll handle the composition. You only need to think that you’re giving me a theme.

Rikka: I see. Then it’ll be fine.

Tsubasa: Hehehe okay, then might as well throw you a super difficult theme!!! As a revenge for always making us go crazy.

Shiki: Hm. Tsubasa, you’ve been saying “crazy” for a while, but when I ask for something, it’s because I know it’s possible. In short, from my point of view, it’s not crazy at all, and even if it might sound so for you at first, you can do it in the end. Be confident.

Tsubasa: O-oh… Okay, okay.

Dai: When it comes to this, Tsubasa can’t even object.

Rikka: Right.

Dai: But well, I’m aware I’m also included, too.

Rikka: *laughs* Me too. I guess Shiki hasn’t realized, but that side of him is perfect for a producer.

Shiki: Dai, Rikka. Do you have something to say?

Rikka & Dai: Nothing really.

Shiki: Good. Well then, shall we start deciding the concept for the new series?

Tsubasa: Ah, wait, wait. By the way, how many CDs do you want to make for this “series”?

Shiki: Given the release interval for the “Beauties of the nature” series, 3 CDs would be the limit.

Tsubasa: Hmmm okay. So a trilogy, yeah? That’s plenty!

Shiki: At first let’s say whatever comes to your minds. Any ideas?

Tsubasa: Hm… oh. Me! It’s super typical, but how about flowers? Three flowers!

Rikka: Hmm… I personally like it, but won’t it overlap with the “Beauties of the nature”’s flower?

Tsubasa: Ah, that’s right…

Dai: If we talk about typical… constellations?

Shiki: *chuckles* That’s very like you.

Dai: … Don’t laugh, please…

Shiki: I wasn’t teasing you. I thought it was good. Very romantic, I like stars too.

Tsubasa: *laughs* Are you the type who looks at the stars? You’re joking.

Shiki: Listen, you… have you ever looked at Nagano’s starry sky? It’s wonderful.

Tsubasa: *laughs* Shiki, you used to get lost in the mountains as a child, right? To know the directions, stars are the best~

Rikka: I don’t think he means it that way. More than concepts, how about we do something more abstract?

Shiki: Hm. As a composer, it’s a theme that could be worthwhile to challenge. For example?

Rikka: Hmm… our fan club names?

Dai: If it’s a 3-CD series, we’d be missing one space.

Rikka: Oh, that’s true. You’re right.

Tsubasa: Okay, let’s omit Shiki!!

Shiki: I don’t think leaving others out is a good idea…

Shiki: As a result of our discussion, the subject for the new series has been decided to be “color”.

Tsubasa & Rikka & Dai: Yep!! *claps*

Shiki: Using the unit’s image colours, red, black, and white as themes… I see.

Dai: Is it difficult, or something?

Shiki: No, I just thought that it’s something I wouldn’t have come up with. Colors, huh… precisely because it is abstract, there’s a lot you can express. Hm, interesting.

Tsubasa: Oh? Shiki’s eyes are mode on. Are you on fire?

Shiki: Yeah. Contrary to the subjects I get from outside works, I feel I’m getting challenged by you guys. It’s pretty fun. I accept the challenge.

Tsubasa: *chuckles* In the recording studio we also feel like accepting a challenge, so we’re even.

Dai: You said it.

Rikka: Shiki, do your best. I’m looking forward to the new songs.

Shiki: Leave it to me. Okay, the name for the new series of unit songs will be “COLOR”. We’ll dye them in our colours.

Everyone: Yeah!

Translation index || Soliradi

TL notes:

“Beauties of the nature” (花鳥風月, kachoufuugetsu) is a series of CDs released by SolidS, Growth and SOARA during 2016, four volumes each. The volumes are based, as the name says, in the traditional themes of natural beauty in Japanese aesthetics, which are flower (花), bird (鳥), wind (風) and moon (月). Like Shiki said, SolidS released them as solos, while Growth and SOARA did it as unit songs. You can see the visuals for them here. (all the songs are amazing btw, listen to them if you haven’t)

Next up is the (in)famous Soliradi! If you play Tsukipara and you’re wondering why Shiki yells “ajillo” all the time, you’ll find out in next track~

[dcbarba-blog]

15 Ps

Hello dear friends, my apologies. I hope this isn't that super late yet. I got hooked up with academic requirements and I happen to stumble upon this. Imagine, I even forgot that I made it as a note already. Yup, this is just a quick flick of my Jakarta adventure.   

You might be wondering about the P. Honestly, I don’t really know why P. Would you help me out?

1. Passport

                Despite our incomplete documents, and panic and anxiety attacks, God, with His Mighty hand, caused us to get through the processing even until the seemingly unending waiting time of our passports’ release. God in His unfathomable ways chose to stretch our patience and trust in Him and our boats may be tossed by the waves while He sleeps, but He wakes up before it sinks.    

2. Partners

                Imagine raising an amount good for a semester’s tuition in just one month by me whose financial status is unstable, yeah I'm still a college student. hehe. But God really showed me that I am indeed His child. He led me to people, to believers, who were more than willing to support His Great Commission and He blessed my team and I with more than enough financial support. Indeed, in our weakness, God is strong; in our deficiency, God is always sufficient; and the more that we feel less of ourselves the more that He becomes more in us.

3. Parents

                They and my siblings were all skeptical about HYBRID. They were full of inquiries and doubts and they were all enumerating the pros and cons but more so with the cons obviously talking me out of joining. But even then, God continued to sustain and inspire me despite all the discouragements and hurt I got from my own family. But then I realized that they were only very much concerned about me given my weak health condition. Amazingly, when we finally purchased tickets, God caused their hearts to soften and poured out their moral support for me and kept on checking on me through the whole mission trip.

4. Physical condition

                I have always thought that having acute bronchial asthma has always been one of my disadvantages and I felt like it has been imprisoning me ever since. Thankfully, God made me realize then that the same is not a disadvantage but it is otherwise, for it had served as a reminder for me to take extra care of my body more so when we were at Jakarta. Being always offered with food I am restricted to consume and subjected to unending troughs of cigarette smoke, the more that God strengthened my self-control and self-preservation. Yes, my body is my gift and offering to the God Most High and it is most certainly right to offer it at its best condition.

5. Plane

                  HYBRID gave me the first opportunity to fly and it was not just one flight but four flights! The thought of flying excited yet somehow made me nervous. Excited because it was my first time and nervous, on the other hand, aside from the idea of accident but also of leaving the comforting walls of my home and secured limits of my country. But while flying, God caused my excitement to surpass all my other thoughts and I was so occupied with this miracle of a metal floating and flying in the air amidst the fluffy cottony clouds (I could almost touch them!). It was a one-time big-time experience and God wanted me to witness before my very eyes the wonders of His creations.

6. Philippine immigration

                We were held up for a few minutes at the immigration and I was, again, caught up with nervousness and uneasiness. But God reminded me once again and proved to me that He was and is with us every step of the way that despite no official document other than our HYBRID Budget, we were allowed to get through! God replaced my heart’s restlessness with unmistakable calmness as what Psalm 46:10 promised (“Be still and know that I am God. My name will be exalted throughout the nations.”).

7. Place

                Jakarta, a place unknown to me yet has been beckoning my feet to set on its inviting shores. Born in a small town, I was fixed dumbfounded with what caught my weary eyes – huge buildings of different designs, wide scary streets, varieties of transportation, big billboards, and a lot more! Thoughts of fear, insufficiencies and uncertainties came rushing through me and the more I thought of how big this place is, the more I became smaller and insignificant. But hey, who is bigger than my God? Absolutely and irrevocably nothing! I should not be shaken for in spite of all the unknowns and uncertainties, I have a Certain, Known and All-Knowing God!     

8. Provision

                Through the mission trip, I saw before me how God, being the Best Provider, worked in everything. He had shown His favor to my teammates and I through His provisions of food, shelter, finances and a whole lot more. Indeed, no one in need is beyond God’s abounding grace and riches. For He is the vine and we are the branches, if we stay joined in Him, we will be well provided and even more!

9. Protection

                Being uprooted from my comfort zone, I felt, literally, super lost then and doubts about safety came pouring in my head every single moment. Will I (we) feel at peace in our hotel? Will I (we) be able to get to and fro our assigned campuses sound, safe, unharmed and complete? Will I (we) be shielded from danger or risks? Indeed, at times, we are caught unaware that we are being attacked at the very heart of the place where we feel most comfortable with, but even then, let us always be assured by this – could there be any safer place for us than in the loving embrace of our Father?

10. People

                One of the best gifts I have ever received from the moment I stepped foot from the airport were the paths of different lives God had allowed to cross with mine even just for a while but I know this crossroad will forever be etched in life's rugged map! Through my new-found friends, I have discovered a lot about myself, the world around me and how I could influence the latter while the same influences me in return. All the people, the LPMI staff, my friends - in their simple awesomeness, in their  loving and thoughtful ways - have carved a mark in my heart, a mark that’s destined to live through time and beyond.

11. Plan

                Yes, God was truly with us all the way. He gifted us with wisdom and discernment in the preparation of everything before actually going to our campus. And what we had planned through Him really paid off. We can never know how far the ripples of our actions would go, so with God’s Divine guidance, better plan them ahead before actually doing them. Eventually, given the consequences of the same, it truly is a great privilege to have freewill to choose whether to allow these consequences to either set us back or push  us forward towards either more estrangement or intimacy with God! But, of course, we would be very much willing to wholeheartedly choose the latter.

12. Progress report

                It has always been in the team’s system that every night during the session, each of us was encouraged to share what we have accomplished during that particular day in hopes of making others aware of some possible strategies or techniques that could be used to be more effective and efficient the next time. Such, indeed, assisted me in filling my inadequacies and insufficiencies. And I learned so much about team effort and team building. Truly praiseworthy to note how God so easily weaves individual differences together to form part of a mat articulated with a variety of complementary colors and designs that perfectly fit.

13. Perfect timing

                Right when God says it is the perfect timing, it really is and I have witnessed it myself. God meant it that we meet our contacts at the right place and at the right time. God meant for their hearts to be prepared – longing, hungry and thirsty – just in time for us to come in and fill the gaps. God willed all those events to happen in His own precious time. Through all those times, God enabled me to ingrain in my mind, heart, and soul to be fully dependent and sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit

14. Power of Prayer

                This is the strongest, most potent weapon I have ever used all through my HYBRID Journey. It is water proof, fireproof, shockproof, worry proof, evil proof and more! It is impenetrable, unshakable, indispensable. It is the only one you have when the others seem to fail. It will never ever fail you like what JESUS Christ did for you! 

15. Praise God

               On our end, all we needed to do then was practice with all our hearts, mind and soul "profound inadequacy, profound dependence and profound humility" to Him who made everything possible even before the beginning until even beyond the very end. Truly, all praises, glory and honor are yours Almighty Father who reigns forever and ever, in JESUS' name, AMEN! 

There you go folks! My HYBRID Journey in 15 Ps :D

Please help me with the P. Super thanks! :D

[angisam]

Your wild side

tumblr (english) 1 / 2  / 3 /  4  /  5  /  6 /  7 /   8 / 9

tumblr (español) 1 / 2 /  3  /  4  / 5 /  6   / 7  / 8   / 9 /  10 / 11

AO3

chapter summary: Now everything is a bit better clarified

Tag: underfell au , Fellwolves au, bad language (I do not cut anything at all) , violence, fight ,”gore”, experiments, panic attacks, I’m bad to describe things as labeled …

character chapter: underfell!Sans , wolvesfell!Pap, Frisk, Flowey

Chapter 10

At first he was surprised at what the boy had said until something clicked in his head. - And if he is perhaps right - that this theory is surreal doesn't make it unlikely at all, years ago he was studying everything about the space-time, even still kept in his basement the remains of the project in which he worked it, not for the purpose of traveling between universes but with the same principles.

Fowey’s face was pure poetry; his face of unexpected surprise said it all - "What?" - "Just think about it, it looks a lot like him, he recognizes bossy as his brother, he knows he lived in snowdin, nobody knows who he is. ... "c-could be .... Maybe ..." - The last sentence was almost a sigh. - "Frisk, cut it that!" - Shouted shaking its leaves up.

"I really think it's my counterpart" - "DO NOT  laugh at us you trashbag!" - "I'm serious, you never heard the theory of parallel worlds" - Frisk looked curious and Flowey with hatred - "look no matter what are you think unlike your wild friends, I - "-" they aren't savages ... "- interrupted annoyed the boy -" yeah, in fact they are more civilized than those that live in that small town "-" THE CASE is that I worked In a project to leave the underground using the concept of travel between space and time of the same reality, I doubt that you understand it but basically we managed to obtain a hypothesis where it confirmed the existence of different time lines or even different alternate universes "- the human and his friend looked a little surprised until the flower began to speak -" you realize that there are endless possibilities more realistic than that stupid story "-" huh? What do you mean "-" well, who can tell us that you do not try to cajole us to kill us behind our backs "- the skeleton simply smiled cheerfully with lazy eyes -" what is your- from the ground come pointy bones that practically rose them Were immobilized. A bone was placed in front of Flowey's view and at the end of the handle could be seen the face of satisfaction of Sans. Bossy fell to the ground in surprise.

"If I wanted to kill you, I would simply kill you, I am not very good to be an actor * wink" * the invoked bone disappeared. "I really don't care if you believe me or not, I'm going to spend the night with you" - "WHAT! What makes you believe that?" - "... the injured leg that your friend doesn’t savage has left me, how late it has been done to return to the town, besides that I have no idea how to return actually "-" all that is your fault "-" it wasn't me who ran out before starting a pleasant conversation "-" Of course, as nice as before? "-" you still breathe, don't you? "- both showed each other sure they would not lose this" battle "with each other, Flowey growled and began to show signs more than Evident irritation while the skeleton seemed to have fun.

"Stop fighting, it's totally stupid ..." - the flower snorted and turned his gaze away and Sans laughed internally of the act. "I have to talk with Flowey for a moment, we'll come right away." The boy moved a few feet away from his original position. Meanwhile Sans looked down to meet the minipapyrus who was still looking at him with his eyes of stupefaction. "Yes ... I know ... I think the same thing when I look at you"

The flower narrowed your eyes at Sans and he crossed my arms - "I swear I can't stand it anymore and we only know him for 10 minutes, do you really believe its history? "-" ... it makes sense somehow "-" Frisk "-" say what you want but what you said has a certain meaning, I mean, if I told him what I can do, I wouldn't believe it and that wouldn't be a lie "- his friend seemed to reflect on what he just heard -" whatever ,you didn't bring me here for that, and the answer is NO "-" WHY NOT? "- shouted the boy unconsciously and quickly some sheets were covering Their mouths- " you can't trust him, be" a Sandy "or not, you don't know their true intentions him, could be dangerous " - "you enter the same of the two brother and thanks to it we are still here" - " it isn't the same situation "-" I trusted you nothing more to meet us, also has already demonstrated that he  can defeat us without any effort "- tired of discussing the subject and knowing any argument exposed the human would find the way to contradict it exhalo and let out an " ok " .

When they left without a second thought under the gaze of his brother. It was not very high should measure something like 1 meter or so, if Sans was in front of Papyrus, or "Bossy" as the boy he call, it would reach the ribs, should be 7 years or so like? Don’t he? His confused face was more than obvious; he had also felt so in the first contact even now felt strange.

"If ... I know ... I also think the same thing when I look at you" - just like the beastly human with a winter coat of hair on his neck but considerably much larger with respect to his height, the jacket reaches his knees. A more determined vision made him realize the scar that crossed his left eye. Even in a different universe was that damn scar...

Sans noticed a sharp prick in his ankle where he had been nibbled, with all the gill had not bothered to even take a quick look, well now was the perfect time.

 It turned out nothing too serious the bones were a bit chipped but still could move .... with pain.

"You have very good teeth, you know? Even my brother hasn't managed to have a smile so sharp "- did not get any particular response from the smallest -" heh you're a fighter alike, right? "Before he finished his alagoas began stroking his head

"WHY NOT?" - a shout from the human was heard, it was more than obvious why they wanted to talk alone, this simply confirmed the fact. He hoped he would not have to go bad, not all of Snowdin's people would come home when night fell below ground, many of them wandered around looking for someone to steal or simply looking for a fight, it was too dangerous and even having a Crippled foot could not maneuver as much as he wanted.

He curled a little as he felt something touch his hand. He had not realized that he still kept his hand on Bossy's head as he kept rambling on his thoughts- "heheh I'm sorry, I guess you don't like it." He moved his hand away as if the skull had begun to burn.

The smaller one stretched towards Sans and began to hug him trying to roll him in the sitting position of Sans as much as he could with his short arms. Without much thought, he grabbed the Minipapyrus and brought it to his lap to make things easier for him. It felt a bit strange about this.

"He really misses her ..." - the human and the Flower returned from their little talk without being aware of it.

"You mean the Sans of this universe? What happened to him? Did you say they took him away? "

"If ... a few weeks ago we were approached by monsters and Sandy tried to keep them away from us by attracting their attention, we know they didn't intend to kill us so we think they took him ... although ... we aren't really sure, we have not seen him ... more" - finished the sentence in a sore voice and the only thing that was heard later was the cold breeze of the forest - "you look a lot like him that's why I acted like that in the city, I really believed that ... maybe I was back."

 The undergroundl was synonymous with survival although in cities people were the most "sociable" continuous fights were something that became a simple routine, the youngest quickly learned the situation of the world where they lived. One day you can be with your loved ones and the other lose everything by crossing you with the wrong person. When his younger brother told him he got a sentry post, there was no day that Sans feared for the life of his little brother. His brother was strong and tenacious and with time passed that fear was disappearing.

In this universe things had not happened like this, his brother's counterpart had lost his older brother being just a child. The embrace of Sans became stronger knew very well how painful it was for a child to lose everything in a day, when they lived in New Home it was common to see children in the streets, surviving without any help. There were not enough shelters or orphanages to shelter all those faces overcome to despair.

"Do you have any verdict mr judge?" - The wolf turned his head to look at his two companions.

"Huh ... oh, yes! Can you be with us”- he smile

"Hehe, that's great, anyway I do not think Pupyrus would have liked the alternative, certainly.

"I thought it was" Papyrus "

" Agh " - without grace was another thing that Flowey would target on his list.