#its the weirdest most incredibly frustrating feeling to feel just slightly off kilter every single minute of the day and knowing u have
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it's every single time i give myself a minute to breathe. a minute away from people, places, distractions, running away from my reality--when the heartbreak catches up and hits me. knocks my fucking breath out.
#as someone who's default has been for the longest time to love love love not being able to give it all the time actually makes me feel#like i am missing a part of me#its the weirdest most incredibly frustrating feeling to feel just slightly off kilter every single minute of the day and knowing u have#no choice but to ignore the oddness bcoz if u poke it its gonna all come crashing down#i hate having loved someone to the point where it was more than how much i loved myself coz now i m left#picking up the pieces they chose to leave behind and not knowing how to piece it all together#and it hurtshurtshurtshurts and never lessens and i can kiss someone else and still feel like a corpse inside#bcoz theres pieces missing that i gave away and that feeling of being incomplete just wont go away#trusting someone to love me forever might have been the stupidest thing i will ever do#and on bad days i think i deserved being left for the sheer stupidity of my life choices#istfg i m never loving again until a man puts a damn ring on my finger#so unbelievably fucking done with this shit#i wanna hate him but i cant and i wanna stop loving but i wont and i wanna feel full again but i dont#tw breakup#tw heartbreak
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