#its super not new i remember making a piece of fish themed art at like 17

[wild-at-mind]

I think one of those things that makes people annoyed at fandoms on here is the people in them who bring every text post or quote or piece of art back to their fav characters. Make your own post about it!

[pencilofawesomeness]

Fics I Absolutely Adore and Would Recommend to Anyone

I’ve been meaning to do this for a long, long time, because I love reading fanworks and they deserve a lot of love and I love sharing things that I love. 

Obviously this isn’t everything, and if it’s not on this list that doesn’t mean I don’t love it, it just means I forgot at this moment. I will be adding to the list and I remember things or come across it again. (Trying to sort through my bookmarks and subscriptions is like trying to catch a fish bare-handed.) I’m also gonna shy away from the one-shots, even though I adore fun one-shots, just for the sake of organization. The list would be super long otherwise, and those are best sorted by fandom. Here... Here are just some brilliant works I want to rant about. 

Disclaimer: I say “recommend” because I would recommend these works, any time any place, but do keep in mind the story’s rating and tags and stuff. Not everything is kid-friendly.

There is absolutely no hierarchy to the list below. They are added as I add.

Fairy Dance of Death

by Catsy ( @fairydanceofdeath​ )

Fandom: Sword Art Online Word Count: 660,282 Status: ongoing

「AU reboot of the entire SAO storyline, beginning from the premise that Kayaba Akihiko was obsessed with magic and Norse Mythology rather than swords and pure melee. As a result, he created the Death Game of Alfheim Online rather than the floating castle of Aincrad—a world in which player-killing is not a crime, and the nine player races are in competition with each other to reach the top of the World Tree. Multi-POV epic following the stories of multiple canon characters throughout the game.」

If Catsy wrote the SAO light novels and anime, SAO would be among the legendary series. Fairy Dance of Death has this amazingly simple premise of making Alfheim Online, the video game from the original series’ less-than-stellar second part, the game that the main cast becomes trapped in. However, it’s so much more. They took the characters and made them characters, and everyone gets ample spotlight—even background characters that normally wouldn’t receive a second thought. It’s masterful work, and to boot, there is a lovely frame of in-game mystery and player conflict. The organization is phenomenal and I aspire to world-build the way they did. Not to mention that stakes are so much higher and this series has ripped my heart to shreds more than once. 

It has also brought me great joy, and even when I was in the dumps and didn’t want to read anything, a FDOD update made me pick up my phone and read when I otherwise wouldn’t have. It has a really special place in my heart. It updates once in a blue moon, but that’s okay. 

Even if you have never seen a single piece of Sword Art Online, Fairy Dance of Death is still a great read. In fact, it’s the Better Version of SAO, if we’re all being honest, so I would especially recommend it if you hadn’t seen the original. Or if you have. The characters are given so much love and detail, to the point where Fairy Dance of Death’s characterizations are More Canon to me than Kawahara Reki’s work. It is just a beautiful piece of fiction, and it makes you question the depravity of man on levels that SAO shied away from. 

Poisoned Dreams

by StrangeDiamond

Fandom: Genshin Impact Word Count: 82,852 Status: Complete, with a complete sequel and more to come

「 Every night now, Diluc dreams of death. Usually Kaeya's. In between these nightmares his life is falling apart. It doesn't take Kaeya long to realize that this is something much more insidious than simple bad dreams. His brother's life and sanity are on the line and there is nothing Kaeya won't do to save him. Bonus chapter added.」

In a growing fandom from a new game, StrangeDiamond swooped in and characterized these bad boys so well I think it’s canon. It really breathes life into the video game lore, and it’s an A+ depiction of awkward sibling re-bonding post-Terrible-Happenings. Poisoned Dreams can be read alone with a basic understanding of Genshin storybuilding, but StrangeDiamond has an entire group of fics and oneshots set in the same headcanon, and they integrate them really well and subtly together. Not to mention that the narrative style is really clever with making you question what is real and what is dream (a big point in this story) and the inner voices of the point-of-view characters are very compelling. 

One Word to Change the World

by AgentMalkere 

Fandom: Fairy Tail Collective Word Count: 43,988 (30 parts) Status: probably never coming back

「 In just one universe, Ultear called out to her mother instead of turning away and the fate of Fairy Tail and the world was irrevocably altered. These are glimpses of a world where a single word made all the difference.

In other words, welcome to the Butterfly Effect - Fairy Tail style. 」

It’s a really cute canon-divergent, and while the series makes no attempt to re-write Fairy Tail, it addresses the major events and just snippets in between. It does a good job at giving the vast cast ample spotlight, but it’s also an easy read. It’s special to me because it was the series that made me really pay attention to Bickslow in particular, and I respect that.

Vigilantis Pretium Libertatis

by aradian_nights 

Fandom: Attack on Titan Word Count: 399,226 Status: Complete

「 Five years ago, an accident freed Eren Jaeger, Mikasa Ackerman, and Armin Arlelt from an experiment that forced the most extraordinary powers onto them. After five years of separation, of being raised apart to be heroes by a set of three very different adults, they meet again. As they uncover the truth behind their captivity they realize being free and being heroes are sadly nothing but an illusion. 」

This wrecked me.

I still remember when I read it. It was the beginning of 2018, and I had the flu and a lot of time on my hands, so I binge-read this. It was simultaneously the best and the worst thing I have ever done, because I resonated with it so deeply there were times I was just staring up at the ceiling wondering what was real. I empathized with the characters to a level I rarely achieve, and I empathize easily. I laughed. I cried. It was amazing.

I refer to this story in conversation to this day. It handled themes published authors have only dreamed of achieving. Heck, if Dani (the author) took out the names of the AoT cast and replaced it with new ones, it could be its own stand alone novel. It is worldbuilding from the ground up, and any fandom knowledge you take in with you is used against you like a knife leveraged against your throat. Yet, no one is out of character. It’s phenomenal. I would say more, but this is something I daren’t spoil for anybody, because you must be as wrecked as I was. Vigilantis Pretium Libertatis is a level of writing I achieve to gain as a writer myself. It is a masterpiece in every sense of the word.

Life in Glass Houses

by blueskyscribe ( @blueskyscribe​ )

Fandom: Transformers (Transformers Prime, Transformers: Shattered Glass) Word Count: 119,900 Status: Ongoing (maybe, I hope)

「 No one would have thought Bumblebee and Knock Out were capable of getting along, but when they're stuck in a strange new world and their only hope of survival is cooperation . . . Yeah, they're probably doomed. 」

I could be biased because Knock Out and Bumblebee are two of my favorite characters, but it really is brilliant. Two enemies, stuck together—but not in an overly cliché way. It’s the right amount of cliché, with heaps moral conflict and inner conflict and sometimes just beating each other with a broom when no one is looking. It’s also a fascinating look into what makes a character the way they are in relation to the morals they possess, and how stalwart those morals can be. I can’t help but think of this story whenever I see or write a “role reverse” or mirror-verse AU. It does an excellent job at making all of the characters engaging and their own character, despite being in a mirror-verse.

Yesterday Upon the Stair

by PitViperOfDoom ( @pitviperofdoom​ )

Fandom: My Hero Academia Word Count: 424,070 Status: Complete

「 Midoriya Izuku has always been written off as weird. As if it's not bad enough to be the quirkless weakling, he has to be the weird quirkless weakling on top of it.

But truthfully, the "weird" part is the only part that's accurate. He's determined not to be a weakling, and in spite of what it says on paper, he's not actually quirkless. Even before meeting All-Might and taking on the power of One For All, Izuku isn't quirkless.

Not that anyone would believe it if he told them. 」

As a person who normally doesn’t read these kind of minor canon divergences, especially at the time of reading, I frickin’ love this fic. In fact, I think YUTS gave me a deep appreciation for canon divergence fics. It’s MHA in all of its glory but it’s so much more, and even the parts that rehash canon give new light to the characters and their points of view. 

I had read Viper’s work before and saw Yesterday Upon the Stair filling my inbox, and then I finally watched My Hero Academia. It was one of the first MHA fics I read and it still has a very special place in my heart. I recommend this series to people who don’t even watch MHA; in fact, there are some who might prefer the darker tones and themes of heroism vs apathy to the main series. Not to mention the writing style is phenomenal, and I aspire to be that good. It made me laugh. It made me cry. Yes, tears streaming down my face crying. It is the best ghost story I have ever read.

the Vantage Point Universe

by Aggie2011 ( @aggie2011whoop​ )

Fandom: The Avengers (MCU) Collective Word Count: 1,032,651 (35 parts) Status: Ongoing (just slowed down)

「 Six months after the Loki incident, Clint isn't adjusting well. When an enemy from his days in the Army comes back to haunt him, he'll be forced to face a part of his past - and to move past Loki, if he has a hope of finding his place with the Avengers. (First of a universe created to center around Clint Barton) 」

// description taken from first installment

Have you enjoyed the MCU, especially the first-era Avengers phase, but like me, were disappointed in the fact that Hawkeye was barely there? The VP universe is for you. 

I honestly have a hard time remembering what was canon and what was VP. And if it’s not canon, it should be. The VP universe gave so much life to Clint and to Natasha and to all of SHIELD and even the rest of the Avengers. It’s just...so good. It’s completely immersive. It focuses a lot on Hawkeye and Black Widow from before the Avengers team-up, as well as after, and it all flows together so beautifully. Not to mention that I can be reading a mission that happened pre-series, so I know that they are going to live with all of their limbs, and I still sit there on the edge of my seat the whole time.

The OCs, minor as they are, that are created for this are also wonderfully done. I can’t believe Dan and Phil don’t exist in canon. Every character, canon or no, is engaging and dynamic, it is a pleasure to follow each point of view. The emotional turmoil is also handled very well, and the VP universe carries the MCU trend of humanizing its heroes and takes it so much further. 

Ghosts of the Future

by Evan Stanley ( @evanstanleyportfolio​ )

Fandom: Sonic the Hedgehog Word Count: comic (18 issues) Status: ongoing

「 About 200 years in the future, Silver the Hedgehog is an average kid living in San Francisco... except for his strange and terrible dreams of a dying Blue Hedgehog, a Black Hedgehog, and mysterious gems called "Chaos Emeralds". What will he do, when these "figments of his imagination" appear before him in his real life? 」

// description taken from first installment

Okay so this is the only one that isn’t an Ao3 story, but rather a comic on DeviantArt. However, it is still one of my favorite stories. Even though it takes the commonalities of Sonic canon and turns them on its head, GotF really treats the characters well. There are enough familiar world elements to create intrigue, but it is set in a completely different take of the future, so there is ample opportunity for world building and being able to engage with a completely new thing. I wish SEGA put as much love in the series (namely the games, because the comics are *chef’s kiss*) and all of its possibilities as creators like Evan Stanley do.

The friendship and family relationships in GotF are so diverse and all so fantastic to witness. It’s a keynote example of the new hero and the old veterans, and both parties are active and trying their best.

Do not be alarmed by the starting art style. Sure, it’s rough around the edges at first, but then it gets better, and then it gets gorgeous, and then you’re left there so stunned that it looks like just life canon art. And then you could be like me, blinking slowly as my small brain finally connected that this Evan Stanley is in fact the Evan Stanley. GotF is an amazing fanwork, but she also draws and writes for the Official Canon comics (the IDW ones now) and that work is also phenomenal and should be supported. 

Whirlwind

by Lynse ( @ladylynse​ )

Fandom: Danny Phantom, American Dragon: Jake Long, Miraculous Ladybug, Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja Word Count: 75,556 Status: Complete

「 Jake should be used to ominous predictions by now. Randy should know better than to blindly follow McFist. Adrien should think twice before sneaking away. And Danny really should've expected something like this when he got that phone call from Jake. (Secret Quartet fic) 」

I have to start by saying that I adore all of Lynse’s fics, and I chose this one simply because it is one of my favorites. But it’s all fantastic, one hundred percent. I also love Mirrored, the sort-of prequel to this fic, but Whirlwind just has the chaotic pure bean energy that each of the shows bring and it foils against each other so perfectly. This is the epitome of the Secret Quartet crossover, truly.

All fandoms and all characters get ample love, and the way the reader gets to see just how badly the characters’ assumptions are going is positively wonderful. It’s so easy to fall into the “I know what’s happening and so do the characters” trap, but Lynse leaps over it gracefully and lands in greatness. The fic had me smiling like a maniac one minute, and feeling sorry for my babies the next. Wonderful. Simply fantastic!

[nuttyjellyfishlover]

One Piece Anime Wano Arc Episodes 890

One Piece Anime: Wano Arc, Episodes 890 This honestly is less going to be a review and more of a commentary as I watch through the anime's rendition of the Wano arc. I've honestly never really watched too much of the One Pieceanime, mostly just looking up the highlights of the arcs I read in the manga. I did watch the filler episodes and most of the movies, as I've talked about at length recently. And everyone tells me that the anime has some rather terrible pacing, particularly around the time of Dressrossa, which is apparently pretty padded out. But then I heard the absolute opposite for Wano, where the anime has received a new art-style and one hell of a fancy makeover. And I thought... hey, I'm on a One Piece kick this year, clearly, so yeah, I think I'm going to give this a shot.

The Wano arc, I think, is one that works a lot better because it has the reverse problem of a lot of One Piece arcs -- there are a lot of moments in Act One of the manga's version of the story that the writer clearly purposefully threw in a couple of off-screened moments that the anime could expand into full action scenes. I already know that Sanji versus Page One is fully animated in the anime, and scenes like Big Mom vs. Kaido or Zoro vs. Basil Hawkins are extended a lot more than the couple of panels we had in the manga. And Wano's got a lot of supporting characters, some of which actually get swept under the rug when I first read through the manga chapters weekly. So yeah, having bright colours and voices and music is going to make this a much more fun experience!

Anyway, here goes my collection of random notes and commentary. Be aware that there will be MANGA SPOILERS, as I will point out a couple of things here and there about stuff I notice that's foreshadowing or whatever:

* Marco's blue-and-yellow phoenix form looks so, so much more vibrant and pops out compared to anything else in the series in colour, huh? I think out of any other character, Marco is extra-memorable in animated format. * That said, basically half this episode is just a recap of the Paramount War. I mean, I haven't seen the Paramount War in full animated format, so it's nice to hear Whitebeard and Ace and Marco speak some of their more famous lines there. But on the other hand, it's also it's kind of one of the more-criticized parts of the One Piece anime that any time they could pad out an episode with scenes from a previously-produced episode, they will. * We actually get to see the Grudge/Payback War in the anime! I think this is less of a showcase of events that actually happened and more of a symbolic one, but hey, we get to see Blackbeard doing some sky-quakes and black holes and Marco turning phoenix. It just shows the Whitebeard division commanders getting sucked into a giant Dragon-Ball-esque spirit bomb Black Hole. Actually pretty neat! * Jozu has both arms in that vision. Whether it's an error or a spoiler or if he has a prosthetic a la Akainu in Film: Z, we'll see eventually.

* This episode also has a bit of a recap of the revelations about Wano from the Zou arc, but it's a lot shorter and feels a lot more relevant to the upcoming arc. * Brook actually expresses some interest on Vivi, apparently having heard of her from the others. I've always liked this from the filler episodes, of the newer Straw Hats slowly learning about prior adventures. Brook being Brook, of course, a panty joke was tossed in. * The Japanese-art style water waves look so pretty when animated! * The random octopus that makes Japanese kabuki theater (?) sounds is another thing that works so much better in the anime. I've always thought it felt a bit forced and random in the manga version. * The high-tempo music when the Sunny sails into the koi waves is very, very fun! * Ah, yes, the very first chapter of Wano in the manga shows off a bunch of carps jumping up a waterfall. You know, considering the whole legend that a carp that jumps over the waterfall transforms into a dragon... i.e., a fish that is also a dragon...

* The first one that's properly and almost fully drawn in the new Wano art style! And it looks gorgeous. * Also a new theme song! I've never paid that much attention to theme songs in anime, but I definitely like "One Dream One Wish" more than "We're the Super Powers". Shame that, as with most anime, the opening sort of spoils, like, half of the things that happens in the arc. * Speaking of great background music... the tempo of that opening instrumental that Komurasaki plays on shamisen is pretty catchy, especially with that octopus going iyooo~ in the background. It also makes for very fun background music for Zoro's rampage at the end of the episode. * Anime Wano is so freaking colourful. The rooftops, the kimonos, the hair... I think I remembered reading that Oda made it a point to subvert the fact that everyone in feudal Japan had black hair by explicitly doing the opposite -- black hair is the exception rather than the norm in Wano. Fun! * The frog on Usopp's hat is a real frog! I always thought it was just a hat! It's adorable! The wiki tells me it's called Gama Pyonnosuke. It's an adorable friend! Forget Carrot or Kin'emon or Yamato, Gama Pyonnosuke for next Straw Hat! * The biggest expansion here is that we actually follow Zoro around as he wanders around the city until he gets arrested by the corrupt magistrate. And Zoro actually bumps into the man-slayer and corrupt magistrate, actually explaining why he recognizes the specific scent of blood during the whole seppuku court. * And then we get around a minute of Zoro fighting the magistrate guards with the seppuku knife and good ol' fisticuffs, something that I didn't think I needed, but is certainly very fun to watch! * This new animation studio loves the angled zoom-in into eyes, and I highly approve. I think we had that like at least three times when Zoro decides to get dangerous.

* I never quite realized that if Luffy hadn't been interrupted by the octopus and washed up next to the Thousand Sunny, the poor ship would be literally left to its own devices. You'd think after losing Merry, the Straw Hats would be more careful with their ships... * Zoro gets to slash the magistrates up even more! It's a single Tatsu Maki, but god damn what a pretty Tatsu Maki. The shot of his feet kicking and breaking the wooden floor, the black aura around his blades, the way that the dragon aura appears behind him, the demonic red eyes as Zoro slams down from the sky, and the shots of the surrounding terrain being cut up into cubes... pretty awesome! * Luffy dodging the bullet from the random Beast Pirate goon with Observation Haki and the gomu-gomu-long-range-bitchslap has always been cool in the manga, and this episode makes it even cooler. Those glowing eyes! This is going to be the whole commentary, isn't it? Just me commenting on the scenes I find to be really cool? * Luffy's Conqueror Haki against the giant baboon is another very cool one. From the expression to the delivery of the line to the sound effect... Luffy's expression is actually pretty cool and borderline scary as he beats up the second goon. No wonder Tama went straight into "This is the I surrender pose!" * Also added in the anime is a vignette of Franky, Robin and Usopp seeing the news of Zorojuro becoming a wanted criminal. Again, not entirely necessary to know the story, but actually scenes that I don't mind being shown to us. Particularly that scene of Usopp utterly bullshitting an officer. * Luffy pets Komachiyo with his rubber arms. Komachiyo is a good boy. This is the most important scene.

* Did the manga show Luffy hiding the Sunny and letting it anchor in a cave? I don't remember it. I know that before the flashback and the raid we see the Sunny there, but it's nice to actually show Luffy not being so callous with the Sunny. * They got a pretty good voice actress for Tama that really makes her pretty adorable! So many times these kid guest star characters end up being annoying if they don't get a good voice, but between the voice-acting and the expressions, she's pretty fun! * Also, I think this is going to be something I repeat a couple of times, but both Tama and Tenguyama are so much more visually interesting with their full colour palettes. * Oh, right, Drake was the one that ransacked Tama's village. Wonder if that'll actually come up later on in the story... * Okay, thanks to the anime, it's really going to drill to me that it's pronounced 'Diez Drake' and not 'Eks Drake'. * I'm pretty sure everyone noticed it, but Ace learned to weave hats in Wano! That's how he became buddies with Oars Junior! I didn't notice it until just now!

* (Episode is the Cidre Guild filler arc that ties in to Stampede.) * What is Tenguyama waiting for? It's probably Oden or his retainers, but I don't think he's part of the samurai that was recruited by Kin'emon's group. Maybe he just missed the big recruitment drive, but that's weird. I wonder what role he's going to play in the arc... * There is a random metal guitar riff when Luffy sees the Nidai Kitetsu. And a glow of Observation Haki on Luffy's eyes. That's a small detail, but very cool! He also uses Observation when Hawkins arrives later on. I love the little trail of glowing red that streams out of his pupils when he activates it. * Tenguyama's sword has a very cool leaf-based handguard! Never noticed that. * Speaking of cool Observation Haki effects, Zoro's apparently activates when he senses sake. Appropriate! * I know it's me repeating this over and over, and we'll get so many cooler scenes later on, but Zoro casually launching that Phoenix Cannon to blow up the two random raptor-riders when he saves Tsuru? Such a simple scene but still so cool. Also very cool is the very brief slo-mo as Zoro re-angles the pathway of his slice when cutting down the second random goon. * Unlike most of the other things, I've always noticed that Basil Hawkins has a very cool Koma-deer mount. It looks even cooler in motion!

* This is perhaps one of the more extended scenes, since it features... fight scenes! In the manga, I think this lasted... maybe half a chapter? Less? A couple of page spreads? It's not just the Hawkins fight, either, Luffy's 'swordfighting' with Nidai Kitetsu also gets extended. Luffy's a bit more successful in using the sword to block and parry here. * Luffy's voice actor really makes the 'de gozaru' sound really funny. * I 100% missed Tsuru the first time I read through this chapter since we only see part of her in a single panel before her full-body debut after the Hawkins fight, and it's a lot less likely that you'll make that mistake in the anime. * Some 'elite' goons show up here, including a guy that uses his ponytail as a whip against Zoro, and a dude that makes fissures with a hammer that fights Luffy. Probably feels a bit more filler-y compared to the rest of the action scenes, but that's honestly nitpicking. * Zoro launching a Phoenix Cannon that slashes Hawkins's face is very cool. * Hawkins' little straw dolls gets an extended scene of it crawling out of his arm. It's so creepy, I love it. * Hawkins' giant straw demon StandBankaigets an very cool summoning animation and it's so creepy. The skies darkens and everything. Most importantly, it makes noises! Again, I love it.

* Luffy and Zoro vs. Hawkins! It's extended beyond just the simple 'dodge, then one-shot-slash' that it was in the manga. I really like Hawkins and his creepy-ass Straw Stand, so I am a huge fan of this. We get a couple of nice juxtaposition shots of Hawkins and the straw monster. Also Zoro goes shirtless in the fight. That's an important detail! * I really, really love how Zoro is having a gritted-teeth expression as he fights the giant straw demon; the straw demon is going gakakakakakakaka like a lunatic... then we cut to Hawkins who has a deadpan, bored expression as he swings his sword in the distance. * The animators really like to let the straw monster use the nails entwined to the tips of its fingers. That's fun! Zoro backhand-blocking the nails from hitting Luffy and Tama? That's cool! * Zoro does Ichi-Gorilla-Ni-Gorilla at one point, and totally slices and 'kills' Hawkins a bunch of times. * Also, speaking of pretty, glowing-eyes motion shots, Zoro using Nigiri: Toro Samon? Yeah. The cut itself is cool, but the zoom-in on Zoro's eyes as he does so? I'm sorry, I have a weakness for that kind of shot, it appears. * To extend the fight so that it's not just a single exchange of blows, Komachiyo gets knocked to the ground so that Zoro and the straw demon can actually fight for a bit. * Also shots I have a weakness to? DBZ-style 'aftermath of a powerful move'. This one isn't too over-the-top, but the slash extending into the sky and the shockwave rippling out from where Zoro slices the strawman thing is cool. * We actually see the scene of Okiku being harassed by Urashima in chronological order, and Urashima scares off a customer. Also, the implied scene of Zoro scaring off Urashima is actually shown here.

* This episode kind of extends the scenes in Tsuru's shop a bit more. Not the most exciting thing, but it does really help to build up Tama, Tsuru and Kiku. * ...wait, Tsuru's shop just displays the Kozuki crest very, very evidently on its door awning. If simply speaking the Kozuki name alone is a punishable crime, how did they get away with that? * Zoro trying to get Luffy to adopt a Wano-ized name is extra-funny in the anime! * Speaking of extended fight scenes, Batman gets to shoot alotmore arrows at Luffy and Zoro. It's kind of over-the-top on Batman's part, if we're being honest, even if Zoro and Luffy very easily dispatches of them.

* The anime does give Batman the ability to control his arrows via sonic waves or something, but he lasted for a much, much longer time than he really should have. * Batman fucking blocks Luffy's Busoshoku-empowered punch! He most definitely doesn't do it in the manga, and sure, knocking Luffy down with sonic waves? I buy that. Blocking Luffy and causing a small explosion in the air? ...I'm pretty sure just some random Gifter isn't supposed to be able to do that. Unless they're thinking of the other Batman? * They make the initial shot of Holdem answering the phone with the lion face pretty intimidating! * Holdem's lion beating their shared balls is still one of the weirdest jokes in the manga. * Some really nice face shots in this one, from Tama to Holdem to the lion to Luffy's group.

* A pretty obvious extended filler is Urashima bullying other sumo wrestlers. Urashima is kind of a dipshit, so it's not a particularly enjoyable filler for me. * Zoro gets to sumo-wrestle with one of Urashima's goons! This one, on the other hand, is pretty fun. We also get a little added bit where Zoro smirks after remembering Kiku's earlier insistence that she's a samurai, so it's less of a 'he doesn't give a shit' and more 'he wants to see what Kiku's skill is' or something.

* Luffy vs. Urashima is prolonged a bit in here, obviously. Not as entertaining as fighting Hawkins or even Batman, but okay, sure. Lots of grunting and growling in this one. Urashima cheats a bit more, Luffy has to use Armament Haki at one point... really don't think Urashima's someone that you should bother using hardening on, Luffy. * The kabuki-style delivery of "I'm going to be the king of pirates" is very well done. * Poor Tama! Holdem's a jackass. * We actually get to see Urashima crashing into Holdem's house, in yet another obvious 'hey, anime team, this is something for you to animate' scene from the manga. * Law gets an extended scene with seeing the sick Bepo, including a Room/Scan showcase and Bepo looking cute and Law being unable to keep being angry at him.

* The fight against the pirates and samurai in Bakura Town gets extended a fair bit in this episode. Luffy throws Nidai Kitetsu's scabbard around again, repeating the thing he did before. * This episode noticeably has a bunch of brief flashbacks to previous episodes. Anime episodes do this all the time to easily eat up like, ten or fifteen seconds of runtime. But I felt this one was particularly noticeable since it's to the previous episode which we already had a recap segment of before the episode begun. * Ball-de-boo!

* We get an adorable crayon drawing memory when Luffy remembers Zunisha one-shotting Jack's fleet. * Luffy and Zoro's synchronized neck-crick is pretty fun. Also fun is their super-speed when they simultaneously rescue Tama and steal the food barge. The question is, where is this super-speed when they were bamboozled by Batman and Gazelleman? * Unlike the anime, Holdem is able to turn his sword into a flaming segmented sword. It's like Zabimaru from Bleach, but on fire! * We get an extra scene of a random goon holding Kiku hostage and Zoro locking eyes with her and saying "I'm not going to help you", knowing full well she's pretending to be a damsel in distress. * Speed also gets to do something here! She gets to shoot Armament Haki'd arrows at Zoro and Kiku! In the manga she doesn't do anything while this is happening. * REDDO HAAAAAWK! * God damn that's a very satisfying Red Hawk. Such a pretty-looking one! This was the scene that a friend showed me that got me excited to sit down and watch the Wano arc in anime format. From Holdem shooting a lion's fire (how does that work?) and engulfing Luffy, to Tama's yelling, to the zoom-in to Luffy's angry eyes, to the orb of flame dissipating, the zoom-in to Luffy's angry face, the impact, the music... it's just Luffy beating up Holdem, who means jack-all in the grand scheme of things, but what a badass Red Hawk.

And I think that's a neat place to stop off, with the initial Hawkins-Urashima-Holdem opening prologue to Wano done with. I'm not sure how often I'll update this little watch-along series, but I certainly am enjoying myself!

[spnfanficpond]

October Angel Fish Awards

Every month all of you fantastic writers work your asses off to post some truly incredible stories. Our Angel Fish Awards are the way for all of us, as a community of writers and readers, to lift each other up and give praise to those who have captured our attention and deserve a few kind words.

The monthly Angel Fish Awards are peer-nominated, meaning ANYONE IN THE POND CAN NOMINATE ANY POND MEMBER’S FIC. While the Pond was founded to support the Guppies, everyone in this community deserves to be showered with love and feedback, and we hope that by opening this up as a Pond wide system, we’ll be able to share the love as far as it can go.

NOTE: WE’VE BEEN HAVING OCCASIONAL PROBLEMS WITH ASKS GOING MISSING. Please use the Submit button when submitting your nominations and make sure you’re signed into Tumblr or your URL won’t show. (If the form asks for your name and email address, then you’re not signed in.) If you like, you can also send a message to Michelle or Mana to check and make sure we got your submission.

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, HERE ARE OCTOBER’S ANGEL FISH AWARDS!

Nominated by @impala-dreamer​

 Lay All Your Love on Me (oneshot) by @idabbleincrazy​

Very very tasty Sam smut here. Love him just letting go and getting into it. Very good work!!

For Tonight (oneshot) by @dontshootmespence​ 

Amazing. Simple yet beautiful and oh the sweet pain. I loved it.

Nominated by Anon

Ride with Me by @katehuntington​

This story is amazing! Kate is weaving such an intricate little AU while still remaining true to the characters. Her descriptions are spot on and the dialogue just feels so…perfect. I adore the insight we are getting from Dean’s perspective too. This is such a unique story and now I just want to go on a trail ride (and find me a cowboy *winks*)!

Nominated by @manawhaat​

Dessert Then Dinner (oneshot) by @atc74​

HOLY SHITBALLS! I generally am not a slut for Rob, but this made me the absolute biggest slut for Rob. Oy vey. The inspiration was fucking there! That picture did things to me and the fic that followed definitely did things to me. It’s hot, it’s fucking ACCURATE representation of lust for the way a man is dressed. Ay ay ay, these words and image are just happen to be exactly what makes my brain explode. 

Witches Fuckin’ Suck (oneshot) by @crashdevlin​

This. Fic. Is. Fuckin’. Weird. It’s weird. It’s absolutely weird. IN THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY. OMG. I have never related to all parties in a fic so thoroughly. It’s hilarious. It’s ridiculous. There’s a funniness and curiosity that bleeds into sexiness in such a light and honest way. The way this scenario presents itself is so damn real within the realm of Jody and Donna and me. Fucking fantastic! 

Nominated by @slytherkins​

River (oneshot) by @thoughtslikeaminefield

Love me some Denny, but this one is almost better because it’s just implied. There are all sorts of references to Dean’s past, but they are subtle, and the fic itself is understated. It’s also hawt. :p And Dean is so in character. I just…I just like this. Is just good. Bittersweet and sexy.

Drabble #5 (oneshot) by @thegirlwhorunswithwinchesters​

I loved this drabble. It’s so understated. Big responses in these types of situations are great and all, but I think the fact that they were so reserved made it all the more touching. And particularly in character for Dean, imho. Read it! Be moved. :p

A Dangerous Game ch.6 (series) by @risingphoenix761​

Ooooooh Myyyyy Gaaaaaaawd. Y'all. New chapter. Smut…so hawt. Character dynamic…so fun. Crowley…so, so secksy. Magic…so magicy. :p Remusly, this series just blows me away.  

Nominated by @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​

About A Boy (series) by @percywinchester27​

I would like to nominate Ana’s About a Boy series. It has me on the edge of my seat already. Ana is such an insanely smart writer and she really knows how to build a story. She also know her character super well and she is wicked at writing them as kids/young adults. It’s not a reader insert which I know turn a bunch of people off which is a huge shame cause this one really deserves a lot of love and attention.

Nominated by @lovetusk​

A Little Hide and Seek (series) by @iflostreturntosteverogers​

Can I nominate this new series that Carrie is working on? She’s really growing as a writer lately, and so far this series really showcases that.

Nominated by @princessmisery666​

Blood In Bed (oneshot) by @slytherkins​

So I don’t support @slytherkins as much as she supports me and my writing so I wanted to read something of hers, even though it’s not my ‘usual’ cup of tea!!

And god damn I’m so f******g happy, scrap that, ecstatic that I did. This was fun, engaging, funny, sweet and heart breaking. I know she knows Crowley, she quite literally is his Queen 👑. She gets him spot on and this could quite easily be canon. I can see it happening.

I wish I had the words to tell you how brilliant this is, how much I really like it. Demon Dean is perfectly portrayed and I just can’t express how good this is. Mark as my favourite and one I will return to, many times.

Not Always The Way (oneshot) by @kittenofdoomage​

THIS WAS PERFECTION!! Yes I know I’m shouting but I need to!!!

Sweet, fluffy, smutty, perfectly Sam, cute and awkward and kind and patient and just yeah!

Nominated by @ellen-reincarnated1967​

A New Fall (series) by @iwantthedean​ 

It's autumn themed, full of the apple pie life, orchards, pumpkins, cinnamon rolls that you can eat as well as the human cinnaroll Jensen post season 15. The family history of the reader really puts you right at the farmer's market and you'll feel cozy. There's also a twist. Looking forward to the rest, but the chapters up now, are addicting like apple pie!

Nominated by @girl-with-a-fandom-fettish​

Blood and Water (series) by @crashdevlin​

This story is fan-freakin-tastic! I love everything about it. I’m all about Dark!chesters and Crash is killing it, especially since the boys still feel in character despite the whole ‘screwing their sisiter’ thing. Bravo Crash! Can’t wait to see what else is in store for these three.

His Property (series) by @negans-lucille-tblr​

How do I begin to describe this amazing work of fanfic? Dirty? Kinky? Delicious? Dramatic? Angsty? Smutty? Surprise conflict? On point characters in a very very alternate universe? Yes, I think one of those is a good place to start. Bottom Line: READ THIS FIC (and its sequel Yours)!

Mr. Impala (mixed media) by @evansrogerskitten​

I don’t even remember how I stumbled across this gem but I was shook! I totally thought I was looking at the real thing! And then I read the article, and I was absolutely reading the real AU thing! Such an awesome work of art and fic combined! I was blown away by the quality of it! Props to Ash (and all the other art people) for such an awesome piece and even more props for merging art and fic flawlessly!

Nominated by @stunudo​

Smokestack Lightning (oneshot) by @thoughtslikeaminefield

I’m nominating MJ’s awesome Sam/Rowena fic because it was what we needed after The Rupture. It is real, but also fun and flirty. She is a master at layering the emotions into her fics, especially the smutty ones.

Nominated by @wi-deangirl77​

Stages of Grief (drabble) by @plaidstiel-wormstache​

I’m nominating this drabble by my gal Jessie because it’s so different than a lot of the fics out there.  The way she coveys the pain and sorrow that the characters feel after such a loss is palpable.  And the way she jumps forward to the future that neither of the remaining characters could have even thought possible at the beginning of the story is very bittersweet. 

What’s Left of Me (drabble) by @waywardjoy​

Once again the Queen of Angst (as I’ve so lovingly dubbed her) brings it to the next level.  Writing it all from Sam’s POV she sets up this dark, DARK fic (heed the warnings peeps) for one hell of a ride.  You can’t help but feel as confused, scared and out of control as our hero Sam does as she takes you down the spiraling track that is the plot of this fic.  Well done, dear Joy…well done. 

Thank you all for the awesome work and great feedback!

As with the BFAs, these are not actual awards! This system is set up so everyone in the pond has a chance to share the love and promote a fic/author that has grabbed your attention. The more people that participate, and the more everyone remembers to submit their own fics after posting, the better this will be :D

THANK YOU ALL AGAIN, KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK, AND AS ALWAYS, HAPPY WRITING!

[deanky]

Here are some little like ‘reviews’ of all the Oingo Boingo albums... Under cut LOL... I just like to talk about Oingo Boingo I am so obsessed right now they have become tied for Mr. Bungle as favorite band... But anyways... Hope you enjoy ^_^

Only a Lad: Very fun sound as a whole. I enjoy how like poppy and synthy it is and stuff and that one weird electronic voice Mr. Elf man does in like every song. I remember like actually not liking most of the songs first time I heard it and I’m not sure why because I enjoy 9/10 out of them a lot now... But then again I like almost never really like an album the first time I hear it LOL I have a mean soul. A lot of the songs have pretty evil words in them but I have like slight respect for how much hatred Danny Elfman seems to have had for everyone on the entire planet at the time of writing. And for the majority of songs I cannot really complain about because I think it fits theme of like very happy sounding song but nasty words in it duality of man and such. Only one I really do not like is Capitalism because it has the whiniest lyrics of all and also it just does not sound good like as a song I think I am sorry. I must say it. Forgive me. I was so thrilled hearing Nasty Habits for the first time because I really like songs that sound like a homosexual cartoon villain would sing them to you. Well that’s all. Only a Lad itself was one of the first songs of theirs I heard except sped up and it had a picture of anime Bart Simpson on it. I like it. Good song. Recently I cannot stop getting it and Little Girls stuck in my head. That’s all

Nothing to Fear: Everything about this album is sooooo sooo good it is like so incredibly catered specifically to my tastes. One of the few albums I have loved immediately as soon as I heard I finished listening for the first time and was immediately like oh this is going in my favorites. I add some points also for absolutely incredible beautiful cover art it’s got weird colors weird animals logo made of worm things it’s so beautiful it makes me want to cry.  I think it gets SLIGHTLY weaker in its second half but that is hard not to do with albums. That said though a lot of songs that I felt were slightly worse at first have risen to being my favorites of the album like Why’d We Come and Reptiles and Samurai. Didn’t know what to think about Running on a Treadmill at first but I think it works very well in its simplicity and it is very catchy I can imagine people like singing it on actual treadmill and like jumping around abd being in zero gravity for some reason it is like that music video where they are in the plane but it is treadmills. Well, hi. The only ones that feel like slightly slightly worse to me are Whole Day Off and Islands but I think I am growing to like both of those a lot more too. My favorites though are Grey Matter and Insects and Wild Sex and also Nothing to Fear the titular song and Why’d We Come and Reptiles and Samurai which is over half of the songs so I think that’s good.  I remember listening to Private Life like 5 times before listening to the rest of the album but I always forgot how it went immediately after not sure why because I’d say it is a reasonably catchy song. Anyways INCREDIBLE album. Rude lyrics? Still a thing but tend to be much more agreeable like it is obvious who is being made fun of in like Grey Matter and Nothing to Fear and I say the fun making is well deserved! Even though I may be the target of Grey Matter I understand and I am sorry. The general sound is also amazing I LOVE all the weird noises and metal stuff and clanks and clonks and all the xylophone. Dude the xylophone is so good. Synth and xylophone and guitar they are all best friends and they sound so cool together and I think xylophones should be more widely used in like “pop” music as a whole whatever that defines. I keep wanting to start a band and just play xylophone. Like what’s anybody gonna do to stop me? I love xylophone. That’s all

Good for Your Soul: I wasn’t so impressed by this one the first time I heard it but it quickly wormed its way up to a very close #2 and possibly even tied with Nothing to Fear as my favorite album of theirs. The album art on this one is also really good I will say! I felt like slightly let down at first by it just because it’s so hard to live up to how beautiful of a cover Nothing to Fear has in my mind. But its art is so cool too. Muscle man in wobbly world. What’s more to love (Side note I enjoy the song Wobbly World it is not an Oingo Boingo song it is by Devo I should listen to more Devo.) The first time I listened the only songs that REALLY jumped out at me super hard were No Spill Blood and Fill the Void, and I think those 2 are still tied as my favorites. I LOVE the whole like rhythm No Spill Blood has going on and the weird animal noises and also the lyrics they are not about Animal Farm they are about The Island of Dr. Moreau he did those surgeries don’t you know he made the animals have to be men and they were like are we not men but they didn’t say they were Devo sorry I keep talking about Devo in this Oingo Boingo album review. And BTW Fill the Void also is really great and has possibly my favorite set of lyrics in any song ever to exist which is the part like “Every little thing is a piece of a larger thing / Every little fish is a tyrant of the sea / Every little atom is a master of his family / Every single piece calls my name / What do they want from me?” It is so good it makes me go so insane I love it. Another song that works really well in just being a simple thing.  It is so nice and cool it feels like being in space and you are in one of the levels of one of those Kirby spinoff games where he’s like a ball and you’re rolling him around NOT Canvas Curse the other ones like Dream Course I think. Anyways though while I wasn’t super big on all the other songs they ended up like slowly coming back into my head one by one until I was obsessed with all of them. First it was Pictures of You. Then it was Nothing Bad Ever Happens to Me (would put that in my top 3 as well) and then Dead or Alive and then Little Guns and then Cry of the Vatos and then Wake Up It’s 1984 and then Sweat and then the titular song AND Who Do You Want to Be it was like. Wow. What a world.  WDYWTB + Good for Your Soul + Sweat were the 3 that didn’t really do it for me as much for a while but now I’ve been really enjoying them too so I think I can say I love every single song on this album. It is becoming my best friend. It’s sooo good. It feels like living in one of those fake Utopian cities and there’s actually something sinister going on behind the scenes. Like I will start seeing colors and freaking about it any time soon. Random memory that unlocked in me is that I used to be incredibly obsessed with The Book Thief and its concept of death when I was in like 6th or 7th grade like uncannily so but I never talked about the book ever I just hid it away in my mind. My sad story. Sorry everyone. That’s all

So-Lo: This one is technically just Danny Elfman but you know it is an Oingo Boingo album man they got the whole band there they were just having licensing issues because new label and stuff is my understanding. And they were like. Well let’s take advantage of this and do some less standard Oingo Boingo songs. That is how I grasp this situation I don’t know how correct I am her I actually don’t know that much about O.B. outside of the songs at this point I still cannot name any non-Danny Elfman member and I am really sorry for this and must learn to atone for my ways. This is a good album though. Once again has really good cover art I will say.  It’s like well hello there Mr. Elf man you’ve got some eyes sliding off your face and some funny colors and are controlling some little puppet things maybe it’s like you do you man LOL am I right or am I right! I like this album. This was yet another one where I listened the first time and was like. Man I’m not really feeling it with any of these songs. However I do enjoy that they all sound kind of like they were recorded on a Sega Genesis. I mean it does have very Genesis-y noises I know this was the 80s and it would be more accurate to say the Sega Genesis soudns like this album but you know what I mean. Anyways nothing grabbed me at first but upon my second listen I became extremely obsessed with the song “Go Away” and then listened to it on repeat for 2 hours straight and it still hasn’t got old for me I still like it very good song. Definitely my favorite. Tied with Everybody Needs which is also a very fun song I became similarly enamored with like a day later but didn’t listen to quite as much LOL. But anyways I went through that oh-so-familiar process which I must warn you is also the process I go through for every single album after this! - Where all the other songs started worming their way into my head and I was like oh brother I am beginnign to like them all now! Good for Your Soul, I think, marked like more obvious change from songs tending to be like “This is what Danny Elfman thinks of the world phrased in a humorous way” to more like actual stories and stuff, although the former wasn’t rid of entirely and the latter hadn’t just popped up or anything. But I think this album continued that in a really nice way and while it can be vague, listening to it I always feel that there is like one solid story all the song narratives go throughout. Someone pointed out in like Youtube Comments that Go Away feels like the sadder side of Cool City and to me it feels like the whole album is kind of in that vein. Seems to me like all the songs are in the Cool City itself and you’re seeing like the various different horrible things that go on in that town and horrible people that live in it. Yknow? Like Tough as Nails and Everybody Needs make me think of like various awful weird a$$ holbs living there and then stuff like Sucker for Mystery and Lightning and It Only Makes Me Laugh. Well they are clearly from the perspectives of some guy. The same guy? Maybe maybe not I don’t feel like they are the same guy. But it feels like they are like experiencing weird horrible sh*t in this horrible town that is filled with racists but also gay people. I like this album I enjoy it

Dead Man’s Party: OK I am sorry to say. This is a good album but it hasn’t COMPLETELY grown on me yet. But I DO like it a lot. I enjoy it it’s good. I really really love Just Another Day and the titular song and Heard Somebody Cry and Nobody Lives Forever and Weird Science which is over half of them so not bad all things considered. And I do not DISLIKE any songs. But the other ones haven’t quite grown on me yet. This album does kind of shift into like the more commercial stuff it’s not like generic pop or nothing. But it is like slightly strange to get used to. That said. The songs I like I REALLY like thye are so good. No One Lives Forever is an incredible incredible song just like Nasty Habits it fulfills my love of songs that sound like they are being sung by evil guys in cartoons but are not they’re actually being sung by Danny Elfman who is an evil guy in real life. Sorry I didn’t mean it he probably is not that evil I’m sure he’s perfectly nice Mr. Elf man if you are reading this I apologize. Anyways though. I like the general sound of this album I will say! I think though it has thing going on where like, in my mind, some of the songs feel like way too happy and overly peppy almost like mocking. I have a weird mind and a weird way of processing things and I am also incredibly afraid of everything on this planet so keep that in mind BTW I am sorry. But like Stay and Fool’s Paradise and Help Me and Same Man I was Before all have that kind of feeling to me, it’s like these are so cheerful and cheesy sounding to me it kind of scares me a little bit. However... I am starting to feel this less with Help me and Stay, and also I felt this a little bit with Heard Somebody Cry at first as well and I no longer do. So maybe I’m still going through the motions of song-liking as I do.  As I said though the favorites on here are incredible. Weird Science may have been written for strange movie deal and they may be really saddened by its memory or maybe just the music video’s memory but it’s a very fun song nevertheless. Dead Man’s Party itself it really fun true classic. Very orange song to me. It’s orange and purple like I hear it and I am like ah yes I am experiencing orange and purple. Very nice shades of orange and purple though, and they are mixing together in pleasing ways and throwing a big party and everyone’s invited you might even say it’s a dead man’s party heh heh heh (grins devilishly). I think this like takes the kind of narratives in Good for Your Soul and So-Lo and like takes it to best form! In that it has a very clear yet not super specific narrative going on throughout the whole album, I really like whenever an album has songs set up so pleasingly and nice like that it makes me sad when they’re just like in random order. But of course this album is all about death and accepting it and stuff and like all the different feelings of sadness and happiness and stuff that all go into it! And I like its message a lot, like obviously you shouldn’t want to die but don’t fear it. It has a very nice depiction of the afterlife. I like all the stuff in Beetlejuice and Corpse Bride with their similar interpretations too although Beetlejuice isn’t quite as positive about it LOL. I want to watch Corpse Bride again. I want to see another singing Danny Elfman skeleton. I want to see the Peter Lorre worm. My one complaint with the album narrative is that Weird Science goes at the end it kinda ruins the whole story a little bit but I can’t fault them because like where COULD they put it?  I think it might work kind of well as the first song because like trying to make frankenstein guy before all the accepting death stuff makes sense. But also. It would be a weird opener. Also the album art is so incredible I love it I want to join their party it’s beautiful. I did not mean for this review to get as long as it did. They just keep getting longer each album I’m sorry the length does not show my opinion but I just keep getting more excited each album

Boi-Ngo: Will admit this one is my least favorite. And once again my bias shows because it has cover art I don’t like very much. It’s just real guys looking at you. Where’s the funny Oingo Boingo touch where’s the charm people!??!? it makes me sad. And also, as a whole, while I DO like most of the songs I feel like I don’t like them as much as I like any of the ones on other albums, and it also has my least favorite song I’ve heard other than Capitalism which is We Close Our Eyes sorry I’ve seen a lot of people who really like that one but it just scares me. It feels so insincere to me it makes me feel that thing once more where it’s like this song is waaayyy to happy and peppy to not feel like it’s kind of sinister deep down. I apologize. It is a fun album however! I think it kind of goes back more to “Danny Elfman’s humorous observations about life”, which is not always a bad thing, but it seems to revert a little bit too much back to like him just being kind of whiny and not making much of a point in like, say, New Generation. Although it is a nice song I think! It scares me when he goes like now he’s got you by the balls. I understand the point of that lyric. But it frightens me.  I think my favorites are Home Again, Elevator Man, Not My Slave (although lyrics feel like slightly concerning), Outrageous, and Pain. Which once again is more than half the album so shows what I know complaining about it this whole time. 

Dark at the End of the Tunnel: I feel bad for this album because before listening to it I always forgot it existed, like I listened to Boi-Ngo and was like aw man I only have one album left! Oh wait nevermind I have 2. And now I keep fearing there’s another one I forgot not including like the live albums and singles stuff. Maybe there is.... haunting me But anyways... I already did like incomprehensible post talking about this one earlier LOL which inspired me to do more equally incomprehensible things on all the other albums hence this post. So I’ve already said a lot of what I have to say about this and hope not to repeat it too much... but... LOL I was so afraid wondering if I would actually like this one or not... I wanted to just because of how awesome the cover art is. And I was afraid because I wasn’t really a big fan of most of the songs at first. But I think with this album and the whole Boingo era they were moving towards like more orchestral stuff and changing their sound and all... So it was a bit strange to get used to at first but the more I listened the more I enjoyed everything I guess like taking in all the instruments and textures and what not. A lot of the songs in this one also feel like kind of creepily cheery but I think it works best for this album specifically, because as I’ve said before it feels very intentional - there is like whole dual thing of more dark mysterious sections and light-hearted happy sections in most of the songs. Although my top 3 are all songs that mostly just have the former going on... Right to Know, Long Breakdown, and Run Away.  I also really enjoy When the Lights Go Out, Skin, Out of Control (though it still feels like vaguely scary to me LOL), and Glory Be... But I keep finding myself getting all the others stuck in my head as well. So still growing on me LOL! I am beginning to appreciate all the other songs more for those cheerier parts as well yknow... I think this whole album has a very fantastical vibe to it LOL but definitely like, a very old fantasy. Like they discovered this album in a giant wizard’s tower like ten thousand years ago and now it’s been unearthed again. But it was created by a child wizard who was like 5 years old. But still had a wizard beard. That’s the guy on the cover I’ve decided. Little wizard from long ago.  However... It does feel like it’s kind of setting up something. Like all the songs do... whole album is good but feels like it’s kind of a preparation for the next one. Which doesn’t make it bad! Just like I feel like it’s kind of part of a set... Incomplete on its own yknow? I would probably rank it in my lower 4 of all the albums but I’ll still say I enjoyed it quite a bit, that is no insult. And I like wizards

Boingo: This album is SO good dude. I’m glad this is what they left off on. Really great finishing album... I have a weird timeline involving this one because it was actually the first album I listened to, my dad showed it to me, but I only ever listened up to Lost Like This before very recently and by recently I mean today and I am still listening to Changes for the first time as I write this which is probably a bad idea but I am doing it anyways. Anyways though... The first O.B. songs my dad showed to me ever were Insanity from this album and Dead Man’s Party the song, and despite how different their two sources are they both have extremely similar structure I think. And so I kind of painted this picture of like all Oingo Boingo songs being similarly structured around 6-7 minutes and mostly repeating the same different sections in slightly different ways. And I am pleased that this album kind of fulfills that - a lot of the songs are like 2-3x longer than they really need to be but I enjoy that because I love long songs.  As I mentioned earlier, DatEotT feels like it’s just the beginning of something, and this provides a very satisfying ‘second half’. I think it works well by itself too, though! Boingo marks such a big change musically from everything else before even DatEoT but it somehow stays very true to their old spirit anyways.. But everything feels so much grander and I really like it. Almost every song has a pretty wistful melancholy feel but at the same time ALSO almost every song but like a different set of almost every song is very big and bombastic. So it definitely has that “well this is our last album goodbye” feel to it. But it’s OK. It’s like a big grand finale. If there was a like an Oingo Boingo musical that had every single song for some reason and lasted like 10 hours I feel like the other albums could be switched around the whole thing regardless of their actual releases, but this one would HAVE to be last. Adding to that, I feel like it really like takes a lot of the earlier concepts I’ve liked a lot in previous albums and had them return. Like So-Lo, many of the songs have pretty different narratives, but all feel like they can be one loose intertwined thing. Pedestrian Wolves and Lost Like This definitely feel connected for one... and like Insanity and Changes provide like nice bookends where the first is like analyzing the world around us and then the second is analyzing the self. Side note. Danny Elfman is always referring to himself as stupid in Oingo Boingo songs. And sometimes it’s just like PoV character or something. But it ticks me off a little bit because he is like clearly not stupid he is like a crazy evil genius.  But ALSO I’m not really sure what exactly the whole story of Boingo is, but it just feels connected in some sort of mysterious way yknow? Maybe it will appear to me later... If Dark at the End of the Tunnel was created by a little five year old wizard ten thousand years ago, this was created by the same wizard when he was reaching the end of his life and was in the wizard’s nursing home in like the 1920s. It still feels like mildly aged, there is SOMETHING about it that feels like it’s meant to be played on like an extremely old awful record player, but it has a much more modern feeling. It almost feels like another interpretation of the afterlife... Maybe that more Beetlejuice kind where it’s just like real life at first but if you peek around the corner you’ll find all the weird sandworms and colorful ghosts and stuff. Anyways though. This album is so good. Not my favorite right now, but definitely in top 3, like at the moment of writing this I would say. #1 is Nothing to Fear. #2 is Good for Your Soul. #3 is Boingo. But I am loving it soooo much on my first actual full listen even though I’ve had time to like absorb half the songs already admittedly. So it might end up being my favorite after all! I think my 3 favorite tracks also on this are Insanity, Lost Like This, and Hey!. Random completely unrelated parallel to my other favorite band. I like that they have a song called Hey! and Mr. Bungle has a song called Hi! It all fits together. And they both have the exclamation point. But anyways ALSO since I’ve only finished listening for the first time Changes finished while I was writing this BTW. I am still figuring out my opinions on the rest of the songs. Don’t think the I am the Walrus cover QUITE does it for me, I like Spider and War Again but not sure if they’re favorites. I hated Can’t See/Useless the first time I listened but now I like it how about that! ONE MORE thing I like about this. Is its songs feel like continuations of stuff in other albums. Although that may just be because of similar themes! Like, War Again feels like a continuation of both Nothing to Fear and Little Guns but it’s about similar subjects to both. And Tender Lumplings, Little Girls, no real explanation needed there. Insanity and Nasty Habits match up pretty well, with both just being like about hating the world although Nasty Habits is more specific than that LOL. Mary is a girl who is unfairly ostracized, Johnny of Only a Lad is a boy who is unfairly praised, you know.  And also one more thing ONE more I know this one ALSO kinda has the classic Danny Elfman yells about things stuff going on but I feel like this is the album where it works best. But maybe I am just a hypocrite. OK that’s all. Hi

[justanotherdeadgirlwalking]

That is Just the Saddest F**king Thing I Have Ever Heard.

TW obviously DEH is about a kid’s suicide, so it has those themes

other parts :)

Part Five. 

Art doesn’t just happen. It’s a process. You need a muse, an inspiration, something that lights a spark in your brain. Inspiration is everywhere. I’m surrounded constantly by beautiful bodies, beautiful faces. Sometimes you walk down the street and see how perfectly someone’s shoulders meet their slender neck, and the image burns into your mind. You want to see it in front of you again, but you can’t because that would require stalking the person to find them, and that’s super fucking creepy. So, you settle for the next best thing, you draw it. You sketch it over and over again until you get it right, and suddenly that woman is in front of you again. I prefer to draw people, because then you never run out of ideas. Faces are so unique; each body is different. There’s billions of people in the world, each one just waiting to be captured; I never run out of ideas. Eyes are like two little galaxies right in the center of the asteroid that is your face.

Putting together a portfolio has been a lot harder than I’d expected. I thought I’d just through my favorite drawings in a folder and call it a day. The only problem is, I hate literally everything I have ever drawn. Mom has always told me that my drawing look like photographs. That’s complete bullshit because you can see fingerprint smudges, and you can tell that one eye is significantly better than the other, and the noses look like shit. I literally want to redo every piece.

I’m not being one of those people that says their work is shit because they’re fishing for compliments, I know they’re good. I’ve been featured in district art shows, and I’ve won awards. And I’m not trying to sound like a cocky asshole either. Art is just the one thing in my life I have complete and total control over, and trust me, I took control. I can choose how it looks, I can make it as perfect, or imperfect as I want it. I had to beg my parents for the best pencils and canvas to use. I figured, I didn’t take music lessons or dance lessons like Zoe did, you guys can buy me some quality supplies. They didn’t want to waste money on the stuff if I wasn’t going to use it. As a child I tried a lot of sports and hated them. When I was ten, I joined the swim team. I practiced every day, for hours. I even talked Zoe into training with me, I made her time me, and yell at me in an angry German accent when I wasn’t making time. Then, after probably hundreds of hours of training, I decided that I didn’t like swimming before I even had the chance to compete. I guess they didn’t want me to do the same thing with art. Mom finally took me to an art store, like a real art store, when I proved to her I was serious about it. It was like going to Disney world. Everything I’ve ever dreamed of was right there in front of me. There was a wall of colored pencils. There were pencils in every color I could think of, and then some, colors I never even seen before. I stood there in awe. It was a game changer to use real colored pencils, not Crayola’s. Larry was so mad, he didn’t understand how art supplies could be so expensive. Well, I don’t understand why someone would spend $100 on a dozen golf balls either, so I guess we’re even.

Since I couldn’t realistically redo every piece of art I’ve ever made, I decided I would just use every piece that my art teacher loved and draw one new piece. It seemed like a good compromise. Miss Schmitt was the only person I really trust with anything. She’s always pushed me to keep going, not to give up on a piece and see it through. She didn’t teach me how to draw, you can’t teach talent, but she always motivated me.

I really needed her motivation now. There was one person I really wanted to draw, but I seemed to have a mental block on what they looked like. Miss Schmitt told me to use a reference picture, but I didn’t want anyone to know who I was drawing. It would make me look psycho, and people finally stopped thinking I was a freak.  I couldn’t bring myself to draw his face, so I drew his body. I drew his New Balance sneakers and his mal fitting khakis. I spent hours trying to replicate the crease down the front of his pants just right. I even made a special trip to the art store to make sure I found the right shades of blue for his stupid stripped shirt. I got an off-white colored pencil so I could shade his cast just right. Evan’s arm may not be broken anymore, but when I think of him, I think of him in his cast, just after I signed it. When everything was still really real and made sense.

I’ve become obsessed with him. How could I not be, he was my one and only friend. Except, that wasn’t true, and he used me for a better life. I really wanted nothing to do with him, but at the same time I wanted to know everything about him. It didn’t help that he was always around.

There was a knock on my door. “Come in” I called, snapping my sketchbook shut. I looked up to see Evan in my room, behind him, Zoe was peering in, almost hiding. “What’s up” I asked them, annoyed. Evan stands there for a second, looking down and playing with his fingers. I cleared my throat to get his attention.

“Um, me and Zoe want to talk to you” he spits out in a nervous stutter. I motion for them to come in. Zoe comes in and sits on my bed, not looking at me. Evan stands still for another moment before pulling the door shut and sitting on the ground where he stood. Everyone is silent for a moment, avoiding eye contact. I cough loudly to end the awkwardness.

“What did you guys want to talk about?” I ask.

Its Zoe that answers, softly, her voice breaking, “I want answers,” she says. Well kid, that makes two of us. “Why did you try to kill yourself.”

I feel like I was kicked in the chest. I don’t really have an explanation as to why. I just did. It was impulsive, seemed like the right thing to do in the moment. I wasn’t suicidal, and I wasn’t depressed beyond my normal gloom and doom. I just did it because I felt like it. I wasn’t feeling helpless or worthless, just bored. Except, I can’t tell her that. “Connor?” she asks. I just stare at her, hoping she will drop it. She meets my gaze and raises an eyebrow. She looks so sad, so broken. I must have really hurt her.

“I don’t want to talk about it” I say.

She sighs and balls her fists and taps them against her legs. She didn’t like that answer. I get it. I’d want to know too, I guess. Except, there’s nothing to know. Except, I wasn’t as important to her as she is to me.

“In the emails you wrote to Evan,” she starts. Oh, great the fake emails, “you were doing so well. Please you don’t need to tell me everything, but I just want to know what happened”

“I said I don’t want to fucking talk about it.” I snap.

Evan coughs, bringing attention to himself. I forgot he was here for a second. He looks nervous, really nervous. I don’t blame him, I could blow up his whole life right now with the truth. “Maybe he needs more time Zoe” he says. I give him a dirty look.

Zoe slams her hand against the bed, “You’ve had months,” she yells, “How much more time do you need. How do you go from climbing trees with Evan to killing yourself in a park?”

“Zoe,” Evan says, “you remember what you read, you don’t want to trigger him.” Trigger me? Okay Evan, you just don’t want me to tell the truth. Evan stands and opens the door, motioning for Zoe to leave. She looks at me again, pleading me with her eyes, then gets up and leaves. Evan lingers for a moment, watching her walk down the hall to her room. He steps back in and slams the door.

“We need to talk f-for real,” He says.

“Oh, for sure” I say, standing up and covering the distance between us until I’m towering over him, “Let’s talk about how you’re taking advantage of my entire fucking family.”

He’s beet red. “I’m not” he says, looking at the floor.

“Hey buddy, we’re not friends, we never were friends, and we’re probably never going to be friends.” I say

“Wh-why not?” he whispers.

“News flash,” I yell, “the first and only time I ever talked to you was when I signed your cast remember? You lied to everyone, and you’re a shitty liar.”

Evan is silent, he’s staring at the ground and pulling at his fingers. I watch him as he scratches his neck, pulls his ear, shifts his weight. I’ve thought Evan and I were the same; neither of us had friends because we were outcasts so to speak. He was just socially awkward, whereas I was the school freak. But I could tell he felt the same stuff I felt. The same wish that someone would notice us, that we were both on the outside, always looking in. Maybe if things were different we would be friends. I tried reaching out to him, but he was too self-absorbed with his own issues to notice me. And now, I am somehow engulfed in his issues. He took my suicide and made it about him. He lied to my parents and Zoe and the whole world. Evan Hansen was a nobody, a barely in the background kind of guy, and now his basically an internet celebrity. And me? People still don’t care about me, but at least they’re nice to me now.

I think that’s why I’m so angry about the whole situation. He got what he always wanted, he got his dreams come true. He got a taste of a perfect life, so he did what he had to do. But it ends now. I hope it was fun and he had a blast while he dragged me along.

“Did you read the emails?” Evan finally asks. I read them. He wrote a story of a perfect friendship. Friends that quote their favorite bands and tells jokes nobody understands except us two, and there’s nothing that we can’t discus, like girls we wish would notice us but never do. He even included me encouraging him to go after my sister. The fucking creep.

“Dear Evan Hansen,” I say, “You either tell Zoe and my parents the truth, or I will.” I open my door and shove him out of my room, “Sincerely, me.

[tube-thoughts-blog]

Vol. 11

Zero stars - terrible, 1/2 a star - dull, 1 star - folly, 1 1/2 stars - lacking, 2 stars - fair, 2 1/2 stars - decent, 3 stars - terrific

"Groove On Fight" --Sega Saturn-- (Atlus) -1997- *Imagine a Japanese pretty boy version of Christopher Walken with a neo biker / leather cowboy fetish. Now imagine an entire, -wealthy & powerful- "Game of Thrones style" inbred family of them all with some peculiar fetish. They fight it out for control of the family. The matriarchy of the family is two grannies tied back to back like Siamese bondage twins. One fight takes place on the back of an American type bomber plane up above the clouds. That last sentence pretty much speaks to the disturbed nature of a lot of Japanese art after World War 2.* close to 3 stars

Godfrey Ho's "Ninja Commandments" (1987) *Who knew that honky moral issues like pre-marital sex were such problems for Ninjas, or that they liked to party with skanky groupies, and that pretty much all ninjas are not-so-secretly middle age white men.* between 2 and 2 1/2 stars

Red Letter Media: Best of the Worst --------

*Deadly Prey: Ice T's "The Game"(?), a movie where a guy gets kidnapped by army dudes and hunted for sport only to fight back, this time with a hero who's a Patrick Swayze type bohunk Rambo.* 2 1/2 stars

*Hard Ticket To Hawaii: Skinemax classic about blonde bimbos trying to stop criminal smuggling in an exotic locale. Also, killer, "infectious," cancer-ridden, huge snake.* 2 1/2 stars

*Miami Connection: Lost & found gem of a movie with nearly as many awkwardly awesome moments as Tommy Wiseau's "The Room."* 3 stars

Red Letter agrees that Miami Connection is "The Best of the Worst."

---------------------------------

"Red Earth" aka "Warzard" (Capcom) *A wizard summons up a bunch of kaiju monsters, in scattered epic sites, that only a big lion-man and several other heroes can vanquish from the earth. Typical wizard being a total dickhead, to the rest of magic-impaired mankind, behavior.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

"Bushido Blade 2" (Playstation 1) *Bloodthirsty Japanese clans have kept up the honor of warring over territory for power for centuries up into modern times, in this game. It's a nice mixture of both old and new worlds, and the music and dialogue is well done, and even the setting and characters (though limited by the blocky polygon look of early 3D). It keeps with "realism" too with one good killing stroke, with a warrior's sword, doing the job. It even has thrills like bikini girls with machine guns.* 2 1/2 stars

"The Kurosagi Corpse Delivery Service Vol. 4" (Dark Horse Manga) *Morbid and eccentric tales of a group of Buddhist college students with unique gifts of communicating with corpses littered in strange locations around Japan. They help fill the odd requests of these bodies to be put at peace usually in some morbid way or involving some morbid mystery. Instead of trash "reality" entertainment like Long Island Medium, this much better "talking with the deceased" fiction should be turned into tv entertainment for western audiences. It's so much more interesting and entertaining.* 3 stars

"Savage Reign" (SNK) *This is the Kris Kross of fighters. Kriss Kross being a pair of 12 year old rappers whose record company realized their talent was lacking so they came up with the bright idea to have the duo dress with their clothes backwards. The gimmicks in Savage Reign are plenty. There's a clown who fights with roller skates. A valley-girl swinging around a pink bowling ball. His name is Joker, and she looks like a cleaned up Harley Quinn, come to think of it now. A Vanilla Ice look-a-like sports a Captain America' Canadian tuxedo of denim and stars and stripes. The Ryu style hero, of the game, fights without fireballs but instead a silly boomerang. The big boss is a fancier "cock of the walk" Shao Kahn throwing his punches with fists covered in boxing gloves. Sickly serene backgrounds include a generic Disneyland theme park and an underground cow milking gang hideout that is almost as weird as something out of "Naked Lunch."* 2 stars

The Spoony Experiment: Clones of Bruce Lee *When Bruce Lee tragically died during the height of his career, movie producing jerks didn't let it stop them from abusing his legacy. Tons of Bruce Lee impersonators popped up and a sub-genre of exploitation movies was born. They were called Brucesploitation flicks. In this one, it's about as shameless as it gets with a plot about cloning Bruce Lee before his body has even grown cold and using the clones for nefarious purposes.* close to 2 stars for the sleazy, cheesy movie and 3 stars for Spoony's review

"Fight For Life" (The Last Official Atari Jaguar Game) --1996-- *Show a kid, today, an Atari 2600 game and they'll think you're giving them something like an ink blot test. Having witnessed an Atari 2600 game, back in the day, it felt like I was standing on the edge of the digital future. The Atari Jaguar promised that brave, new, digital future with their doomed Jaguar gaming machine. I remember the first time I saw Sega's Virtua Fighter in an arcade. I did get that "tomorrow feeling." I couldn't wait to take these blocky 3D characters and make them my sandbox toys tossing them around with their ragdoll physics. It was mind blowing. Atari's Fight For Life wanted to be like Virtua Fighter, only it comes off more like a 2600 ink blot test for the imagination, and really painful to the senses. Man, is it ugly and clunky. It's definitely not "epic," but I can compare it to something else that is "epic." The Faith No More "Epic" music video where the fish out of water is flopping its death throes. It's more like that fish than a jaguar.* between 1 and 1 1/2 stars

The Cinema Snob: Karate Girl *Rape revenge exploitation "thriller" circa 1970s about a mute girl from a Turkish village. The kind of movie that Tarantino would rip off elements from and be called a genius later. Also featuring an infamous over-the-top death scene that's become an internet meme.* close to 2 stars for the movie & close to 3 stars for the review

"The Blonde Fury" (1989) *Cynthia Rothrock is the greatest female action star. It had to be said, because it's true. This is a Hong Kong action flick about crazy counterfeiters and quirky investigators. The English dubbing is extra entertaining and the comedy is quite clever.* 3 stars

Black Sails: Season 1 Episode 5 *Finally, a bloody battle, at sea, to go along with the pirate base politics and prostitute abuse.* 3 stars

Hot Package: Pilot (Adult Swim) --2013-- *Spoof of insipid celebrity obsessed shows like E!NEWS and Entertainment Tonight, but with a weird EverythingIsTerrible style obscure internet clip twist. Featuring "hot phone sex" Pat from Access Hollywood and produced by Tim & Eric from Adult Swim.* close to 2 1/2 stars

"Slap Happy Rhythm Busters" (Playstation One) *Filled with quirky characters who use supermoves similar to a Marvel Versus series game & graphics as brightly colored as 'Viewtiful Joe' 'Katamari Damacy' & 'Legend of Zelda Windwaker', Slap Happy will slap you silly with enjoyment.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

"Slaughter Sport" aka "Tongue of the Fatman" (Razorsoft) Sega Genesis 1991 *Another barbaric battle of death, in a palace pit, hosted by a Jabba the Hutt style freak boss who also looks like a shirtless Eric Cartman, in his underwear, with a hideous face and tongue on his fat rolls of a belly. Tech-abominations like a cybernetic chicken, fierce sex slave warrior chicks, gassy gargoyles, spider-women, bad boy white rappers, and other mutated freaks of the wasteland compete for the hunger and amusement of Mondu, the fatman. His pet sand-shark finishes off the losers.* running from close to 2 stars down to 1 star

"Godzilla, Destroy All Monsters: Melee" (x-Box) *This has almost everything a fan of kaiju destruction could want. Just about every Tokyo stomping monster is in it, and playable. Only thing missing is frightened citizens running about pointing at "Gojira." Plus, I think the voices over the airwaves should sound Asian. Points for the quirky bits like a UFO hovering over attacking and Mothra getting in on the action.* close to 3 stars

"Rakuga Kids" *Some brats battle their stuffed animals around their playrooms and neighborhood that look like they're out of a pop-up storybook. It's sort of Street Fighter 2 meets Toy Story 2. Animated similar to Rugrats and Adult Swim's Home Movies.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

"Dragoon Might" -Arcade- (Konami) --1995-- *The fancy presentation of this game reminds me of 2009's 3D spectacle, Avatar. It makes me wanna reach out and pick a low hanging piece of pretty fruit and bite into it. Yet, there's a pit. The artistry and poetry looks at times like it's coming from a Crouching Tiger, but hidden in the bushes, ready to pounce, is a shirtless guy in torn jeans and brandishing a butcher knife. It's just goodtime trash stealing your quarters.* 2 1/2 stars

"Kaiser Knucle" (Arcade) *This is the Vanilla Ice "Cool As Ice" of Street Fighter 2 rip offs. You can play as Fred Flinstone's daughter or "Barts" Yes with an S (teen biker Bart Simpson?) & Ryu w/ flowing mullet, or even "Boggy" who is a MC Hammer wannabe. "Don't hurt 'em!"* 2 stars

Nostalgia Critic: Rise of the Commercials *A look back on when silly advertising really RULED! "Don't put it in your mouth." That is unless it's been properly branded by corporate America and parent approved.* 3 stars

Double Dare: Super Sloppiest Moments *Kids, and their mostly whitebread families, get covered in green slime.* 2 1/2 stars

Jack & Triumph: Commercial *It starts off funny with making fun of Dennis Leary for stealing Bill Hicks' comedy act. Then it gets typical with the whole Alan Thicke showing up and we're supposed to accept that he's now "ironically funny" because he's a square former celebrity acting in an offensive way that we never saw on his old tv show. That's the same kind of lame shit that media is always trying to do in a hipster way with all these former celebrities from the 70s, 80s, or 90s. Robert Smigel can do so much better, see TV Funhouse for example.* close to 2 1/2 stars

Mystery Science Theater 3000: Master Ninja 1 *Lee Van Cleef makes a convincing wild west badass. Surrounded by 70s style slacker dude in a muscle van, mousey & young Demi Moore, hicksploitation villains, and obvious kung fu stuntman doing his action work -Lee struggles to make a convincing martial arts badass.* 2 stars with riffing between 1 1/2 and 2 stars without riffing

"Project Justice" --Sega Dreamcast-- (Capcom) *I believe it was the 70s, that era of great television, that first introduced the novelty of students teaming up with a teacher in the classic "Welcome Back, Kotter." The 80s went further, with this, having society's school aged misfits solving problems of gangs of bullies terrorizing the halls of school or jerks who wanted to close down the local youth center and even the retro cheese staple of ski slope jerks challenging our youthful heroes to a race for control of the ski slope club's mountain. This game is similar, in nature, and has the extra benefit of featuring quirky Japanese style characters and aesthetics.* close to 3 stars

"Last Bronx" (Sega Model 2 Arcade) *Consumer electronics have always been trendy with yuppies. When home entertainment centers became hot, everybody had to have one. Digital watches were on every wrist. A Sony walkman around every neck and in every pocket. Still, there was always a stigma about technology, whenever it was new or in development. At the turn of the 21st century, few would have imagined people lining up around the streets to get each new Apple computer product. Same with gaming, it was a kids novelty, and didn't have the online social media culture that it enjoyed after their was a broadband connection and a Sony Playstation 2 in most every living room across the globe. In the 90s testing stage for high end electronics and gaming, Japan was the tech giant. This game says "Last Bronx" but it's more like "Neo Tokyo." It had to have been pretty revolutionary for the time, and yet it looks very much like some thing most of us western yuppies would turn away at.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

Robocop, the series: Officer Missing *"Winter is coming".... Land of the Dead... The Purge.... A Christmas Carol (Well, maybe not that one), Robocop did it first.* close to 2 1/2 stars

The Gong Show with Dave Attell: Season 1 Episode 8 *This show yips off into the sunset (cancelled, deservingly, I'm guessing) like a balloon animal dog from the sphincter of a sword swallower. It was riding a flaming pogo stick. The straw that broke the camel's back was heavy metal cookie monster or large man in diaper strip tease.* 2 stars

Robert Crumb: Despair *"You may not think it's funny, but I've got a morbid sense of humor."* close to 3 stars

"Power Instinct: Matrimelee" (Atlus) --Neo Geo-- *The creepy family members, from "Groove On Fight," are back. This time they're fighting it out, on a televised American Idol type stage, Jerry Springer style. The prize is a hand in marriage. Given its pedigree, and Japanese setting, it's weird as fuck, yet very surprisingly charming.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

"Kill Or Be Killed" (1980) *Our villain: an escaped Nazi seeking vague revenge by hosting a "Enter the Dragon" type death tournament. Our hero: a mullet-headed, shirtless, karate badass in a tight pair of bell-bottom jeans. He's out to save his girlfriend from the Nazi. Our wildcard: a Game of Thrones type scheming dwarf helping out our karate hero. Our story: pure grindhouse chop sockey cinema.* close to 3 stars

"Rabbit" (Sega Saturn) *Presentation of this game is nice. It reminds me of the new HD Rayman games' colorful eye candy and whimsy joined together with a clever Cartoon Network cartoon like Regular Show or Adventure Time. The fighters each have a beast or spirit animal. It reminds me of sports fanatics and their team mascots. If so many animals weren't endangered, sports fans would be worse than an old school Ruskie with a dancing bear. There would be a stadium full of Eagles fans each with their own personal bald eagle to show off. Dolphins fans would have a kids swimming pool, in the living room beneath the big screen, sporting a live dolphin who they'd feed anchovies off of their pizza to. Another thing about these fighting games, why are all the people in the background so unaffected by the brawls? They're always nicely eating a bowl of noodles in an outdoor cafe or riding a bicycle with a monkey or.....* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

"Waku Waku 7" (Sunsoft) -1996- *While watching lemmings hop around musically, on this game, I had an epiphany. Fellas we are never gonna get around to building those war robots out of our spare lawnmower and washing machine parts. Ladies, our obese house cats aren't gonna magically start talking and giving us humorous life advice to share on social media. Don't fret, we'll always have the Japanese to create our crazy dreams. That is unless a giant, radiated salamander, with a taste for human sushi, crawls up on the sands of some south Pacific beach.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

"Streets of Rage 3" (SEGA) *It's a typical beat 'em up story. The evil Mr. X is controlling the city with his band of street punks. Our heroes: Dr. Zan (the bald fu-manchu sporting head of a martial arts sensei badass on top of a cyborg body riding around on rocket skates), this ninja chick in a short minskirt, a blonde Ken Masters look-a-like kung fu street fighter, and a token 90s black kid who loves basketball so much he won't put down his b'ball. They have to battle through wave after wave of mercs and pick up turkey dinner power ups.* 2 1/2 stars

Red Letter Media: Best of the Worst --------

Russian Terminator: *"that's what friends ARE! for" also an Anna Nicole look-a-like, a Kenny Rogers look-a-like, and a ninja.* 2 very awkward stars

Ninja Vengeance: *"Ninja" (a horrible one) John Tesh look-a-like on the run from the Klan in the backwoods of a hicksploitation town.* 1 1/2 stars

Never Too Young To Die: *Heart-throb John Stamos, sexy "Vanity" who's a Prince protege, and chick with a dick Gene Simmons is the rockstar who plays the over the top villain.* 2 stars

Red Letter Media ranks them best to worst as Russian T., Never Too Y., and Ninja V.*

---------------------------------

Freddy Krueger in "Mortal Kombat" (2011) *Freddy mocked the rising popularity of video games in "Freddy's Dead." Two decades later, he returns to the mockery. Released a couple years after the toothless remake, this tongueless appearance by Freddy is sorely missing Robert Englund's macabre wordplay.* 1 1/2 stars

Freddy's Nightmares: Identity Crisis ----

*Jeff Conaway, and the sheriff from Friday the 13th: Part 6, give this episode a level of Tales from the Crypt "star power." The story is the 'Family Ties' zeitgeist of the its time period. The spirit of the 60s (hippies) versus the spirit of the 80s (yuppies).* close to 3 stars

*Teenage pound puppies. Emo pound puppies.* 1 1/2 stars for most of the episode 2 1/2 stars for the Freddy dreamhouse sequences

---------------------------

Forensic Files: Postal Mortem *Radioshack enthusiast who's a 'Hercules Bullseye Bomber' and master forger of Mormon historical documents.* 2 1/2 stars

Wizards and Warriors: Skies of Death *Doomsday cannon on the cliffs of doom.* 3 stars

Attack On Titan: Episode 2 *Giving a new meaning to "in your face." A term that I don't care for, but here it comes to represent humongous, naked, grinning humans stomping up in one's personal space to chow down on that person like a corndog. The emotions of the kids, and the dread of the situation for them, keeps everything from getting too out of hand as a spectacle.* 3 stars

The Cinema Snob: The Pierre Kirby Saga *A more-than-competent action badass from a handful of less-than-competent Hong Kong action exploitation "movies."* 3 stars for Snob's retrospect and close to 2 stars for the "movies"

Look Around You: Iron *Point point zero point, ring the bell and the experiment can begin within the twinkling of an eye that is hidden behind a metal face shackle.* 2 1/2 stars

VH1 Classics --- Pop Up Video --- (The Big 80's) -------

a-ha - "Take On Me": Few Americans stuck around to notice that this internationally popular Swedish band lasted long after their early 1980s one hit wonder and only broke up after the 1994 Winter Olypics in which they were featured European band.* 3 plus stars for the pop ups and 3 classic MTV stars for the original video

Pat Benatar - Love is a Battlefield": 30 year old Pat portrayed a 16 year old runaway "too controversial for MTV prostitute" in this video.* 3 plus stars with pop ups and close to 3 stars MTV classic without

John Cougar - "Jack & Diane": One guy lived in a coma for 37 years. He wasn't doing a lot of handclapping and air drumming like Johnny Cougar was doing in this video.* 3 stars with pop ups between 2 1/2 and 3 stars without

Lionel Richie - "Hello": Lionel loves for all of his video vixens to have the same hairstyle as he does.* 3 stars with pop ups 2 1/2 stars, cheesy stars, without pop ups

Van Halen - "Hot For Teacher": This unruly music video caused the child stars to eventually become unruly like the real life Van Halen.* 3 plus stars with pop ups 3 sleazy stars without pop ups

--------------------------

Viper: Mind Games *A sleeper saboteur, a vixen viper, and a truckload of disease.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

Twisted Tales #10 ----------------- (Bruce Jones, Bernie Wrightson, Bill Wray, Rick Geary)

Beer: A story of ribbing greenhorns up where the tree-line ends and the green turns to white snowy mountains, and there be yeti's who drive a hard bargain and a sled.* 3 stars

One For The Money: A cat-burglar gets caught and commits murder. He assumes a bear-suit disguise and flees to the woods where he gets gunned down by hunters.* 2 1/2 stars

Hatchet Job: Scientists go back and time and bumble trying to solve the Lizzie Borden murders. ha.* 2 1/2 stars

Two For The Show: A retelling of the earlier cat-burglar tale. This time the party guest kills the intruder, then takes the jewels for himself. Instead of getting shot by a pair of hunters, he gets mauled by a mother grizzly bear. The irony.* close to 3 stars

A haggard man buys a bed from a used store for his sick daughter to rest on her deathbed as she gets out of the hospital. That night, he's visited by the ghost of a girl haunting the bed that died in it, years earlier, in a torn down orphanage fire.* 3 stars, I guess...

Poison in the Pantry: A miserable and mistreated wife and stepmother puts rat poison in the family's soup. She dreams of even better days, from behind bars.* 3 stars

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Hill Street Blues: Life. Death. Eternity... *Etcetera.* 3 stars

X Files: Tooms *Skinner, the Smoking Man, and one of the best "monster" villains ever on the show.* 3 stars

Twitch City: I'm Fat and I'm Proud *Every episode of every tv show ever on tape. And almost everything else a slacker could ever want, for all seasons, except love? And the ability to exit comfortably into society.* 3 stars

Real Pulp Comics #1 *Perverse and humorous tales of skid row lowlifestyle in the babyboom generation's peak.* 2 1/2 stars

Max Headroom: Neurostim *Football, Fast-Food, Fantasy. counter-Fucking-revolutionary.* 3 stars

Farscape: Nerve *Infiltrating a Peacekeeper base, and meeting the Peacekeeper's Darth Vader (Scorpius).* 3 stars

Look Around You: Brain *"Pretty smart for something that looks like a common garden cauliflower."* close 3 stars

Forensic Files: Micro Clues *Tiny communities of freshwater creatures ring out truth and justice from the lungs of a drowned boy of a Swiss village.* 2 stars

Kingdom Hospital: Season 1 Episode 10 *Call the doctor, call the nurse, these guys (King and Lars) are goofy and getting worse.* either 1 star or close to 2 1/2 stars

---Animal Planet--- I Was Bitten: The Walker County Incident *"Animal Planet, surprisingly human." Unsurprisingly stupid. Far more entertaining than the usual (Finding Bigfoot) cryptozoology reality tv whore idiots. Points for the twist ending prank gotcha moment.* either 1 star or close to 2 1/2 stars

======= Trash TV ---- Seasons Finale ------ Marathon ===================

Forensic Files: Something's Fishy *The cyanide tainted Excederin pain reliever panic of the early 90s.* 2 1/2 stars

Forensic Files: Sealed With A Kiss *Psycho teacher stalks herself and then frames a rival faculty member.* close to 3 stars

Forensic Files: Deadly Parasites *Shit leaked into Lake Michigan contaminates the Milwaukee water supply and kills over a hundred people.* 2 1/2 stars

American Horror Story --- Murder House: Afterbirth *The "Murder House" is back on the market at a reduced prices. Also, ghosts can slit other ghosts' throats and they bleed ghost blood. Who knew? They even like to celebrate the season of giving (Christmas) with all the trimmings of the living.* either 1 star or 3 stars for a balls out finale

American Horror Story --- Asylum: Madness Ends *Lana Winters (the reporter from AHS: Asylum) is no Edison Carter (the reporter from Max Headroom). And so concludes this chapter of American Melodrama. Horror's end is supposed to be wrapped up in neat little bows of tenderness... EH? No? Ok.* 2 1/2 stars, I guess

American Horror Story --- Coven: Go To Hell *"I made you die those little deaths." Hell is a fried chicken shack. Ghosts need passports for travel. Who knew? Paula Deen isn't really sorry. She's just sorry that she was caught.* close to 3 stars

American Horror Story --- Coven: The Seven Wonders

*Welcome to the World Series of witchcraft. Let the Harry Potter games begin.

I especially got a chuckle out of the girls just wanna have fun teleportation game of tag that happened right after the hippie witch got stuck in her own personal "8th grade biology dissection of a frog" hell.

It would seem like black humor, but I think it's not meant to be. It's just poor writing.

Take for instance how the redheaded hag/nag says that the new supreme witch can't have a "Whitewater scandal" to be a blemish on her new leadership.

So, she demands to be burned alive in the most soap opera dramatic and laughable way possible to the Stevie Nicks music that's playing throughout the show (the show even begins like a Stevie Nicks music video. *rolls eyes*).

Since the new Coven is going public (kind of like a corporation joining the New York Stock exchange and opening all their books up, or whatever), one would think that committing an act of murder (the witch burning) might somehow leak out and be frowned upon eventually leading to scandal.  

Anyway, that aside, "The Axe Man" and "Fiona" carry the show with their charisma and moody moments together, as usual.

We get another feel good ending, for some reason, because that's horror, according to the producers of this show and the Fox musical GLEE.

Why are these guys pretending to do horror?

I did appreciate Fiona's return from the dead, before dying again (Ha), reminding me of Interview With A Vampire's scene where Tom Cruise crawls out of the swamp after being gatorbait left for dead by his gloomy boyfriend and porcelain doll daughter.

Also, in closing, Fiona's version of hell was quite fitting and moody compared to the pretentious and childish versions of hell for all the other characters.

For example; the annoying good teenager chick's hell beat out the annoying bad teenager chick's hell for level of awfulness.

And that was an accomplishment.

The bad chick's hell was being stuck on a Hollywood musical that she didn't like. *Snot*

The good chick's hell was having her James Dean wannabe boyfriend breaking up with her every day. *Vomit*

I guess hell is happening here on earth for every emo 16 year old all the time.

I have already wasted too many words on most of this pile stinky fish guts.*

running from around 1 1/2 stars a lot of the time up to 2 1/2 stars at different moments

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"Sacred Cow Halloween Special" circa 1993 (All Hallow's Eve? Why not? It's June) *Early 1990s public access tv special featuring a lot of low-fi indie music videos from bands who don't give a shit and live call in guests to the hosts and Bill Hicks in hell. Plus the legend, Bill Hicks, pulls out the home video footage of where he stood in the neighboring cow pasture, and ranted about the government, while Janet Reno rolled tanks with flamethrowers through the walls of a crazy cult so that they could charbroil children. Yep, have a happy trick r' Summer treat and roast in the heat.* more than 2 1/2 stars

"Beyond Belief" =================================

*Early 90s Nickelodeon took time to educate kids, where modern Nick tries to sell them tweeny bopper pop star insipid kid sitcoms.

Stories here include:

The City of the Dead that lies beneath Paris.

History lesson about how the Greeks burned half the Roman, enemy, fleet using solar energized shields.

Sadly poetic tale of The Elephant Man and his time in a London hospital.

Important message about conservation and protecting endangered animals. "Don't cut down the rainforest." Man, I have fond memories of "earth friendly" science lessons during my childhood school years. A really hopeful, positive time.

We visit the Cabaret Mechanical Theater featuring robotic dolls & toys (creepy and cool).

Some funny laws, around the world, are discussed like the illegal carrying of ice cream cones in your pocket in Kentucky and so on.

Cursed opera causes God to smite anyone the opera singer looks at while singing, "Oh, God smash him!"

We meet a 17 year old autistic genius artist who can draw any London monument or building. Autism was still misunderstood, greatly, during this time.

A visit to an old magician's backyard where he displays to us a new, old trick.

Finally, it's a history lesson about Westerners reluctance at first and then being sold on the idea and practice of embalming the corpses of their loved ones for funeral display.

Great stuff.

-Classic commercials include:

Scram Ball, "the hot new game."

Bubble tape, the bubble gum that's hard for grandma to eat.

Murray mountain bikes are so rugged that they can help a 10 year old outrun his 16 year old bro's pickup truck on rocky terrain.

A Fresh Prince of Bel'Air kid is tired of being told "no" so he eats Raisin Bran for some reason....

A gang of 90s tv kids have a video cam corder scavenger hunt thanks to McDonalds.*

close to 3 stars

=======================================================

Police Squad: A Substantial Gift (WLS7-Chicago) 3 - 4 - 1982 =============

*First we get a commercial for a home electronics and appliance store. Man, the 70s and early 80s had such an ugly color decor thing going on. Putrid greens, tans, yellows, and dingy greys going on everything from fridges to stoves to dishwashers to carpet to vaccuumcleaners. Some nice pics of walls of the very popular, at the time, ghetto blaster boom boxes (nice).

 "Blast From The Past," Saturday at 6:30 featuring a dapper dude brushing his wavy hair and a go go chick hula hooping. The 80s were really nostalgic for the 50s.

And, now with a flashing red siren we're told we'll be watching Police Squad "In Color."  The show starts out with a woman who's being stuck for cash by a crooked orthodonist. Ha. She kills her loan clerk boyfriend and frames a poor sap trying to get the loan in a double homicide.

A hazy looking Loren cosmetics commercial

followed by a movie trailer for the insipid Oscar bait movie "On Golden Pond."

Leslie Nielsen shows up to the crime, knocking over trash cans with his cop car. Funny sight gag of the meat wagon boys taking out an extra, extra long body on an extra, extra long stretcher. They find a way to work in the old type "Who's on first!?" joke to her formal statement of the crime.

The forensic lab guy is a wacko.

A visit to the victim's wife, and Nielsen rambles on about himself (ha) during her grief.

The killer dame shows up to give her official statement looking like an obvious fink in a new fur coat and feathered boa.

We get a funny scene where one cop's so tall his head is off camera.

"Crisp and clean" "No Caffeine" "Never had it, never will." "Feelin' up with 7 'Up."

A pretty model girl walks around fields of amber grains waving while sporting a "Cover Girl Face."

 Benson & Open All Night are part of the ABC Friday Night line up.

Lieutenant Nielsen re-enacts the crime by actually shoothing his fellow officers, leaving a pile of bodies while he ponders the crime. Ha.

Cops and Priests (What do you know about life after death? *hands over a 20$*) seek confidential information from a shoe shine man.

Medieval orthodontist gear is highlighted via willingly happy kids wearing headgear. Leslie does some dental exam physical comedy.

Some oblivious cops sight gags in an elevator. Clever stuff.

Showdown with the dirty dame featuring bad wigs and a bullet filled Mexican standoff from a couple feet away from each other behind trash cans and a sidewalk bus bench. Bullhorn "Give it up!" warning from just as close a length.

New Aim mint is the talk of the whiteboy locker room..

Sexy as heck, and wet in a pool, Lynda Carter likes her lips "wet." Mmmmmm

Stay Tuned for Bossom Budies and "Night of 100 Stars"

Old school, syndicated television. Can't beat it.*

3 stars

=========================================================================

MTV's Ridiculousness with special guest Dr. Drew Pinsky *Normally this poor kid's America's Funniest Home Videos for skateboard wiggers, hosted by a skateboard wigger & his black friend & his airheaded blonde friend, would get zero stars for its unfunny commentary on outdated extreme sports accident videos and mishap/ prank videos.... but since quack pop-psychiatry tv celebrity "doctor" Drew is on here and giving insight into the social problems many of these fools, in these foolish videos, do happen to supposedly have... Well, it's more absurd and tolerable.* close to 2 stars

"Five Fingers Of Death" *It's the formula tale of bullies terrorizing a town, and the heroes finally standing up to them. It could be a western, an 80s surfing/ski resort movie, but here it's a Shaw brothers kung fu flick. Many hipsters will recognize the Kill Bill music that Tarantino stole from this film.* 3 stars

Tom Green's Subway Monkey Hour --2002-- *Tom Green will probably always be infamous for the terrible "Freddy Got Fingered," and he deserves it. This hour long MTV special featuring Tom being the weirdest Westerner possibly ever in Japan is way better than that awful Hollywood mistake of a "movie." In fact, it's a dozen times more interesting than the Jackass movies that borrow the skit after skit format of this special. Add an extra thirty minutes of footage from this trip to Japan, which I'm sure they had, and it would have been a better choice to be released in movie theaters instead of "Freddy Got Fingered."* close to 3 stars

Tales From The Crypt: Lover Come Hack To Me *Car trouble on a desolate road on the honeymoon night. The couple seeks shelter in an old-dark-house. There's a cozy fireplace with a big, medieval axe hanging above it. A storm is raging outside. The bride is a strange, little virgin. The groom is a sleazy bohunk acting surprised to have found a 45 magnum in his glove box. She wonders if he married her for the money (no surprise, he did). Bloody memories haunt the place same as their "romance." It's the perfect setting for mur-der (*Thunder & Lightning!*)...* 3 stars

Six Feet Under: The Will *Diving board death. Pyramid scheme. Backstreet Boy look-a-like douchey boyfriend. Meeting of gay firemen. Breaking up with Ed Begley Jr. Blackmail from beyond the grave. Selling a slightly used coffin at a discount rate. Burning someone's name into your flesh. Buyout offer. Emotional breakdown on the bus that killed the father. Toe suck.* close to 3 stars

100 Bullets: The Counterfifth Detective (Vertigo Comics) *Piano bar without a piano player. A private dick wrapped up like the Invisible Man. Stolen art with codes from one's past. A damaging echo.* between 2 1/2 & 3 stars

Justified: Season 1 Episode 5 *The cowboy's pa is an outlaw.* 3 stars

American Gothic: Resurrector *Going away presents for a ghost and a sacrifice to the devil.* close to 3 stars

Kung Fu: Nine Lives *"Find a cat or be a tramp all your life." "Dark and vain are the ways of lust, the poet said." or something of that nature...* 3 stars

"Master of the Flying Guillotine" *A bloody martial arts tournament, where every fighter has a unique gimmick or style, is interrupted by a badass villain using his flying guillotine to pull the heads off of every one armed boxer that he finds until he gets his revenge. He finds out that he's not as badass as the real one armed boxer. This flick had to have had a huge influence on both Street Fighter 2 and Mortal Kombat.* 3 stars

Doctor Who: The Satan Pit *A claustrophobic, high stakes sci fi story similar to The Thing, Leviathan, and Alien.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

"Horror Express" (Christopher Lee & Peter Cushing) *It's about time, some cryptozoology monster goodness. Finding Bigfoot type nonsense has almost killed the fun in this fantasy genre. It helps that this movie is Hammer horror style and has Lovecraftian-dread overtones.* 3 stars

Gerhard's America: Gerhard at NASCAR *Gerhard finds he has a lot in common with effeminate racer Michael Waltrip.* close to 2 1/2 stars

------ TV Carnage:

*A Lot Of Men Collect Barbie Dolls: "It's a professional hobby, now." Nothing weird, at all here.* 2 stars

*A Woman's Guide To Guns and Hallucinating: Learn about your weapon, instead of fantasizing about it.* close to 2 stars

*Aids = Hump Day Poison!: The 80s were all about high risk behavior.* close to 2 1/2 stars

*Child Actor Failures: Are you being rigid enough or in some cases too rigid with your little gold-mine?* close to 3 stars

*Damn Shame: It's a shame that white boy thugs get gunned down every day. Call America's Most Wanted or Yo! MTV Raps with any info on the possible killer.* 2 1/2 stars

---------------------------------------

Monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs: Big Trouble In Little China

*Joe Bob pokes fun at the culture of addiction.

We learn about Carter Wong, the martial arts expert who stars in the movie. Amazing credits to his kung fu game.

Preview for TNT's new classic "The Golden Child" starring Eddie Murphy

quirky KIA suv car commercial from 1998 featuring cliche gator hunting / swamp loving Cajuns who'd be the type in reality shows more than a decade later. It's funny here, sort of, but tiresome if you live in this era of bad reality tv "real folk" like this.

preview for Jacki Chan's "Rumble in the Bronx" and its American cable tv debut on TNT

a yuppy mom tries to stuff a pizza into her toaster, but doesn't have to anymore because some processed junk food company invented toaster pizza snacks. "White lady/mom problems"

Kim Cattral is gorgeous, in this movie, and not an old whore who'd make you swear off women like she would after her Sex in the City days

SNL's Weekend Update anchor Kevin Nealon sells out for a collect call "so 90s it hurts" advertisement. One good thing about cell phones is that these ads disappeared

Joe Bob's Drive In Totals for this flick: 57 dead bodies... One kidnapping... Four motor vehicle chases... One wheelchair chase... One White-Slavery Ring... Yellow-Slavery Ring... One Machine Gun Massacre... One Machete Battle... Multiple Blue Finger-Flame... One Zombie-fied Levitating 2,000-Year-Old Man With Really Bad Fingernails... Exploding Building...Exploding Temple... Knife To The Forehead... One Ocean of Chained Skeletons... One Palace Of Golden Buddhas... Poison Gas... Nine Kung Fu Scenes...

Racquelle Welch in One Million BC, another drive in classic, next week on Monstervision

Some Hollywood stunt-men cowboys beat the shit out of each other for a Pontiac "Montana" minivan. Sure, why not?

Soulful 70s singer-songwriter Aflac family insurance ad, family station wagon Tru Value helpful employee kidnapping ad, Home Depot helpful employees..., some bruthas turn a stranger's need for directions into a roadtrip down the road for some McDonalds.... 90s commercials tried to be really feel good, but come off very insipid

"Tired of Phony Psychics?" Generic graphics of lightning strikes and huge yellow background typed letters plus a doe eyed weirdo lady claiming to have certified psychics for her phone network.... "Guaranteed Authentic by the U.S. Govt." HAAAA.... wow! what a claim!

Joe Bob pines about how there aren't perfect women in the world, and how guys give up women over nail color, comparing it to the plot of the movie being about the search for a perfect, green eyed Chinese chick

Then, Joe Bob skewers the politically correct critics, of this movie, who said that Big Trouble re-enforced Asian stereotypes.

Kitschy style Miller Lite commercial where four old ladies try to contact the spirit of one lady's dead husband. He's a slab, of course, and comes back to life, possessing the body of one of her friends, raiding the fridge for beer and scratching his (her) ass. She's overjoyed.

Kellog's Breakfast Mates... A commercial that's basically saying, "Let corporate America continue to "raise" your children." It's convenient.

Joe Bob teaches us about Kurt Russell's ties to Elvis and Disney and John Carpenter

TNT updates its Monstervision website "once a week." Current people and websites, of the internet(s), update every second of the day. Waiting a week for something new is almost as painful as the information (nonsense) overload of right now.

Dennis Miller is in line at a hipster coffe shop complaining about the price of "a cup of Joe" and the price of collect calls. If he sounds like a cranky and out of touch old man here, wait til a decade later where he's rambling incoherently to his best pal Mr.Bill O'Reilly on Fox News.

Two 90s alterna-chicks having a conversation: "One day we'll meet, marry, and have cyber sex with the man of our dreams online." Robert Englud cameo in Dee Snider's Strangeland

Joe Bob points out that there's a "not so incognito" Penthouse Pet in this flick

TNT Mail Girl Reno gets asked to how much it would take to "get nekkid" by Joe Bob, and then he reads an angry letter from an upset liberal who loves freedom so much that he wants to ban free speech that he doesn't like by calling it "hatred." Ha. Joe Bob made a joke about "killing liberals" or something and this guy got his feelings hurt. Boo hoo.

Joe Bob rips TNT a new asshole for taking an awful commercial break, featuring about 14 insipid 90s "feel good" commercials, during the EPIC kung fu finale. Being on TNT, and not too late in the night unlike TNT's 100% Weird, Monstervision suffered some really lame commercials. USA UP All Night usually had more lame B movies instead of good B movies, yet they featured a lot more entertaining and sleazy commercials compared to Monstervision Other, late night basic cable and UHF B movies had better commercials than TNT as well. Fucking TNT. So schmaltzy and sickening. You watch a weird, late night movie, you want weird late night commercials, and you want them not to interrupt the best part of the movie. You don't want a great kung fu scene stopped to have five minutes of sepia toned artsy cinematography of elderly couples slow dancing in the shadow of the Brooklyn bridge while romantic piano music plays and there's a warm feeling about life insurance or some crap.

Roll Credits.*

3 stars for Big Trouble (For fun and memorable characters, it's to the 80s what A New Hope was to the 70s) 3 stars for Joe Bob and 1 star for TNT's bullstuff

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--- Found Footage Fest:

*Caught In The Web, Staying Safe in Cyberspace: Surfin' with a cyber sleuth and stopping smut and sickos both online and in the real world. If any of this is actually real.* close to 3 stars

*Check It Out _ Acne Video: "Hip" teen talk show infomercial about bogus zits.* 2 1/2 stars

*Chef Keith _ Fake Chef Pranks Morning TV Shows: You can make one of those creepy smiling talking head news morning show hosts believe that "The average person eats around a pound and a half of feces a year." HA! Most of the feces comes from morning talks shows.* 3 stars

*Christian Rock Video Showdown: We're all a wiener slash loser with these bands that are a even more soft rock cross between Journey, Foreigner, Kenny Loggins, and a hairy butt.* close to 3 stars

*John and Johnny and Earrings: Homeshopping host is giddy about seashell earrings.* close to 2 stars

--------------------------------

Fargo: The Six Ungraspables *There are no saints in the animal kingdom, only breakfast... lunch.. and dinner.* 3 stars

Gerhard Reinke's America: Gerhard Reinke in Burlington, Vermont *Home of laidback liberals and Lochness lizards.* 2 1/2 stars

Vanity Fair, Confidential: Mad About the Boys *Lou Pearlman loved to hear singing from voices that hadn't yet gone through puberty. He also loved hot air balloons and ponzi schemes. No surprise that the super-rich sponsor of a creepy cult of child entertainers was not-so-secretly a pig-man spawn of Satan himself.* 2 1/2 stars

X Files: Born Again *Mustache'd cop working Chinatown. He gets killed by some shady colleagues. Years later, he returns as a very gloomy little-girl with special powers and vengeance on her(his) mind.* close to 3 stars

The Prisoner: Checkmate *On a wing and a prayer and unfortunately an air of authority.* 3 stars

----- TV Carnage:

*Dr. Drew and MTV Got Cold Feet: Could be worse. Could be dead like Corey Haim and his girlfriend. Killed by Brigette Nielsen, Stallone and Flava Flav's ex.* close to 2 stars

*TV Carnage: Dixie Carter Death Trip: Designing women to be strangely obnoxious.* 2 stars

*Even His Scream Is Bad Acting: Bohunk (Dumb goodlooking American guy. Not the dictionary definition which insults someone from Europe.) slasher victim.* close to 2 1/2 stars

*Give Head Responsibly: Consult your doctor before giving or receiving.* 2 1/2 stars

*God Gives A Second Chance To Anyone. It's In His Book: Especially to those with a Pat Boone singing style and a new book coming out about second chances.* close to 2 1/2 stars

-----------------------------------------

Hannibal: Sorbet *Hannibal has a stalker/fan/wannabe BFF who compares him to Michael Jackson. Meanwhile, Hannibal keeps recipes of people on their business cards.* between 2 1/2 and 3 stars

Look Around You: Music (season 2) *The show's format has completely changed to an in studio info / variety presentation, and while it's no longer the mock science docu-series that it started out as, it's still silly and clever. Plus, it's longer at a half hour.* 2 1/2 stars

Game of Thrones: Season 3 Episode 9 *This show is good and shockingly heavy, as usual, but I watch it in a way that would more than frustrate diehard fans. I'm seasons behind where everyone else is, and I have no concern as to when I see the next chapter.* 3 stars

Shaw Brothers: Executioners from Shaolin *At the heart of this movie is a dysfunctional kung fu family. On the wedding night, the groom can't get the bride's legs open because her crane style is too strong. Mother teaches son crane style kung fu and they playfully use it even when she's trying to wash the family's clothes. Dad can't even sit down to a good meal, because son wants to test dad's tiger style kung fu.* 3 stars

[soft922-blog]

Something to take inspiration from: Flaneur

Flaneur is part literary magazine, part culture journal, part serialized, interdisciplinary art object. The Berlin-based creators describe the publication as a "vessel." Each issue focuses on a specific street in a specific city across the globe, then explores each locale through idiosyncratic interviews, photo essays (with off-kilter layouts), poetry, illustrations, and even more abstract stylistic devices. "I don't think that Flaneur actually really is a magazine," Grashina Gabelmann, the co-editor-in-chief, told me. "I think it's just that we chose to present these streets in the magazine format."

Created in 2013 by Ricarda Messner (now the publisher), Flaneur is about to release its fourth edition, focused on Rome. While past issues have featured streets in vibrant, artist-hubs like Berlin, Leipzig, and Montreal, the Italian capital was a change of pace for Messner, Gabelmann, and Fabian Saul (the other editor-in-chief). Rome is full of history, but the city's present state felt stagnant and dry to the team, as well as the locals they spoke with while putting together this issue. As a result, they picked the most tourist-y and obnoxious street in the ancient city to be its nucleus: Corso Vittorio Emanuele II.

"How cool would it be to take the most annoying street where everyone thinks there's nothing left to discover, and then find something new in it?" explained Gabelmann.

The Rome issue features a photo essay where two photographers walked down Corso Vittorio separately and documented it with disposable cameras. It also includes an account of an experimental performance piece the editors organized in Italy in which they asked locals to "donate" water to a Roman ruin—the idea being to make the city less dry. But even when heavily conceptual, Flaneur never feels patronizing, nor does it fetishize the cities it focuses on.

I recently talked to Messner and Gabelmann about the newest edition, and how the publication has grown over time. Baudelaire would be proud.

What inspired you to create a magazine? Ricarda Messner: It was always pretty clear to me when I graduated that I always wanted to do something on my own. I never really knew what I would end up doing, but I always just had this feeling that I didn't see myself in this nine to five job. And then I came back from New York and the plan, the love, didn't work out. I was inspired by movies.

I always loved mixing also disciplines with each other, you know? And this is also what the magazine reflects. It has photography, it has architecture, it plays around with different layers. It made sense to me to try the concept with one-street-per-issue in a print format.

What inspired the one-street-per-issue theme? Messner: It had to do with returning to Berlin and rediscovering a town that I never really liked before. New York was my thing, and I always envisioned myself there. Then I was back again in Berlin, and I knew I had to have a closer look at it. I remember that I was looking out the windows at my parents' place a lot because it was so quiet compared to New York. I kept thinking about how my neighbor must have a completely different relationship to the street I spent 12 years of my life living on, and was now staring at out the window once again. And there was something interesting about taking something concrete—literally and figuratively, in this case—but then exploring it through a variety of forms with a sense of freedom. In the end, the street is being used as a storyteller with Flaneur. And that's the thing: When you walk down a street, you can't sum it up.

How has the magazine evolved since it began? Messner: Maybe two weeks ago, G and I sat down to discuss what we're learning from issue to issue—what we're really doing here, or what this thing is. We're realizing more and more that we're not a classic or traditional magazine, and we're also not going to communicate this. It should be clear from opening the front page.

Grashina Gabelmann: We didn't want to go with a travel guide approach where you end every article with a shop listing, address, map, etc. As I got more involved, I realized this was not the direction I wanted to be going in. It's not very interesting, and I think Ricarda felt that way as well. And then when our other editor Fabian came in, Flaneur got its literary twist. Fabian is integral to the conceptual and abstract aspects. He studied philosophy. So he brings in this literary, artistic feel.

Can you tell me about this upcoming issue, number four in Rome? Gabelmann: Rome was really a strange, unique experience. Berlin and Montreal are cities that have a strong cultural network. There's money and support for artists there, and both attract young people who make art. Leipzig has a weird underdog thing, which I think you can feel by reading our issue on it. But Rome is this ancient city that has such a history of art and culture, and it's really struggling to be modern. It was the first city where we felt that people actually needed our presence—even if that sounds patronizing or dickish.

Messner: Well, we offered some Romans a platform to talk about their home to people outside Rome.

Grashina: Yes, not to belittle anyone, but we did offer this. We organized a performance piece in Rome, and this one man described to us how the city is so fucking boring, so dry, and you can't even touch the ruins. There's no way of interacting with the city. It's like a live, sprawling museum, and Romans feel really trapped, in a way. He said something like, "I really want to turn the city into lakes so we can actually do something with the ruins." And so we said OK, yeah, let's do it.

Within two weeks, we had this performance planned. We printed out all these posters and signs that said something like "Rome is a boring and dry; Romans want water," and put them around the ruins. Then we made a little model—like a mini ruin—and put water in it with fish and had that in front of the ruin. We asked every passerby, "Hey, don't you want this to be a lake? How much water do you want to donate to turn this into a lake?" There was a fountain right next to the lake, so every time someone signed the petition, they had to take water from it and pour it into the ruins to symbolically start the lake. So we got people to pour in water, and then people were wearing bathing suits and towels and it became this public celebration and performance. The reactions from the Italian people who helped us were so overwhelmingly positive. They said, "Hey, we haven't done anything like this in months, or even years. We really haven't had the motivation or drive."

Messner: This project is documented in issue four. We videoed everything, so, we'll have a little documentary online, and an article in print. We'll include the posters and the scribbles and the behind-the-scenes details of creating this performance piece. 

On the back of the book, the abstract or manifesto makes it clear that you guys aren't trying to capture the essence of a street or say, "This is it. This is Rome all summed up." Can you expand on that idea? Messner: You have to have this kind of mentality, because we're not from Rome. We only spent two months in Montreal—and even less time in Leipzig. What can we tell them about their city, after all? It's more about the discussion and the constant exchanged ideas related to an experience in a certain place. The artists who contribute work for Flaneur come from many disciplines and countries, and they are really free to create whatever they want.

How have people from each city responded to the Flaneur issues focused on their homes? Messner: In Leipzig, I felt like the initial response was, "Oh, these hipsters are coming and they're fucking ruining our town." They'd flick through the magazine and say, "Oh, I would have done this differently."

Gabelmann: Well, like, yeah, then you make a magazine. But anyway, their attitude to the final thing really matched our experience in the city. Our actual contributors were super happy with the result, but I think we sold 20 magazines at the launch party—not a big success. I don't know about Rome, but I think they will be proud.

You've had four issues now on four distinctly different streets in four cities. Why did you choose those specific streets in each city? Gabelmann: We had never been to Rome before, so we behaved like newborn children there. It was a very different approach, compared to the Berlin issue, which was very personal. Close to the Coliseum is the old political center of Rome. Basically from there to the river is a main traffic spot and it's busy. It's a street filled with both Romans and tourists all the time. So Fabian and I were in Rome for a week in the summer to find our street, and we had a really difficult time picking one at first.

At the end of the week, we met an architect and he said to us, "Oh, Corso Vittorio has something from every epoch of architecture and it's interesting." And we had no idea which street he was talking about. He replied, "That's impossible, you have to pass that street to go anywhere." We googled it and realized we were on that street three times a day, every day. But since it's so hectic and all the points of interests are on little side streets, we never looked it up and actually took in the street. So that was the initial interest: How can a street that's so busy and so important be that easy to ignore? At first, most Romans were irritated and asked us, why would you choose to represent Rome with that ugly street? And then on second thought, they were like, "Oh, OK, actually that's pretty interesting." Think of it this way: I'd love to do Broadway in New York. How cool would it be to take the most annoying street where everyone thinks there's nothing left to discover, and then focus on that place and find something new in it?

What do you think has succeeded most about Flaneur so far? Messner: Well, it's independent and I can also give the contributors and designers freedom to come up with crazy things. This is kind of my prime goal as a publisher: to offer this independent platform for these creative people to go wild with, for as long as possible.

Even our designers Michelle Phillips and Johannes Conrad [both of Studio Y-U-K-I-K-O] come to these towns with us, and this is why every issue of Flaneurlooks different. They each have their own design voice, plus you can see that we play with the medium as well—there are fold-outs, different sorts of paper, and various art styles and mediums in each issue that make sense just for that issue.

Gabelmann: I think another big thing is that we don't go to Rome and interview an artist about his work, and then publish some photos of his work that's been in galleries, alongside the interview. But rather, we meet that artist and then come up with a concept with him on the street—like that performance piece—which is specifically conceived for Flaneur.

I always think about one of my first lectures at university where the professor explained that a magazine is just something that holds something. Like, a gun has a magazine case. A magazine is a vessel. I don't think that Flaneur actually really is a magazine. I think it's just that we chose to present these streets in the magazine format.

[pixelrender]

Every game on my wishlist, part 1

Let’s do this, I’ll share all games on all of my wishlists and write a short reasoning for every single one of them. My goal is to find out, whether I really want to own and play all of these games and how many I will be able to remove from them without much of a regret. There probably are more productive ways to spend free time, but let’s do this.

Itch.io

The list on itch.io is the messiest one of the three. I keep adding and removing and returning games a lot. Right now it features 6 times, 2 games I would like to write about here and 23 games I intended to buy and play at some point. I know I will only have time to play 3-4 or four big games in next 2 years and this list consist mostly of smaller and experimental projects. So, many of them have a good chance of getting played. Let's take a look at individual items now.

1. and 2. Far Future Tourism and Zones

I really want to play some of Sherlock Connor's walking sims. The world's he created are different, a personal expression through the medium of video games. It's not necessary to have two packs on the wishlist and I'll remove one for now.

3. Walden, a game

I guess I might read Thoreau's book first? He's a personality, who intrigues me a lot and a game based on his life could be an interesting time. Also, the game's nature looks stunning. It makes me want to go outside and I don't think I ought to play this instead. To keep my life simple, the game leaves the list.

4. Sagebrush

I'm excited about this one. It's a walking sim with little more direction, a disturbing theme and stunning lo-fi graphics. My cup of tea and an item of high priority on the list.

5. The Haunted Island: A Frog Detective Game

It just feel like a kind game, which can help you out, when you feel down. Together with Sagebrush, these are the two games I need to play asap.

6., 7. and 8. Sokpop Games

A small selection of Sokpop titles (kamer, moreas, huts). They're cheap, original and bite sized. The three selected titles focus more on ambiance than activity/action and that's why I'm interested in them. I don't see any reason in favour of removing them.

9. Voyageur

This game's very likely an underrated gem. It has trading and an interesting narrative but it's also way more stressful than survival space games. Just check out the trailer, this game stays.

10. EarthTongue

You care about an alien ecosystem mostly composed of fungi. That and a recommendation from Natalie Lawhead Is enough for the game to be kept on the list.

11. Of Gods and Men: Daybreak Empire

I want to keep track of this game, but there are so many other tactics games I'd rather play and I own many of them already. This has to go.

12. Dujanah

They say the story is incredible and the art direction reminds me of Catemites, but I'm tired of narrative games rn. Dujanah, you're off the list.

13. Seek Etyliv

This is the most minimalist grid based game I know. Everything about it intrigues me and that's why I need to play it.

14. Overland

I love polished low poly micro worlds of this tactics game. Also, it's a road trip. They say it's not as good as Into the Breach and I agree that they should have released it earlier. But I still want to play it. 15. Sunset

An ambient game about revolution and class, but I'm not all that interested in it and I probably wouldn't be able to run it on my potato of a machine. 16. Art Sqool

It rhymes with cool! Also, I think that it brings something new in video games, that this game indeed is art. I definitely need to play this soon.

17. The Stillness of the Wind

I appreciate a lot what is this game trying to accomplish with minimalist storytelling devices, but I can't get over the color palette.

18. Glass Staircase

I enjoy Puppet Combo. I admire their low poly approach to horror games. They def participated on the renaissance of the genre and ps one era graphics. This is probably their most polished game, but It would be possible to replace it with something else from their catalogue.

19. and 20.  Far Blade and Backlands

The two Bcubedlabs' games have stunning graphics, simple mechanics and almost no stories. Their visual value and low price tag are the two reasons both games are staying.

21. The Space Between

A year ago, even six months ago, I would have been thrilled about it. But that was before I lost interest in stories of any kind. Now I only want an impression or an emotion. I don't want to follow a story to feel sad. I feel sad right now. This might return on my list in 2021, when I change mind again.

22. Caves of Qud

This a complicated hardcore retro hardcore everything ultima inspired features and death heavy rpg I'd love to try out one day. But it will take a long time for me to get there. Also, I don't think it fits with the rest of the list.

23. Pagan: Autogeny

I added this few days ago and I'm interested in it because the gamepage promises a bag of candy. In this game you roam around an abandoned mmo and occasionally come across content. I especially like the promise of 100 acres. It clearly invites the photographer in me in. This might be the right game to make paintings of too.

Humble Bundle

My second wishlist is neatly organized. It contains 16 items in a 4x4 grid. Each row is supposed to have a theme and every purchase breaks it a little. I removed some 30 items from this wishlist in May, so there aren't any items I think should be removed. But talking about every one of them might change that. 1. Gris

I used to be a Devolver fanboy and I still like their making off documentaries, but the majority of their releases are too violent and too much of a crowd pleaser. I still enjoy a game of theirs from time to time and I received a super strong recommendation to play Gris, which isn't violent. It's melancholic. And I think I might add to the discourse, which has been uncritical so far.

2. Timespinner

I like myself a good metroidvania and despite the average reviews, Timespinner has that Mega Drive aesthetic I can't resist.

3. Chasm

They say it's only decent, but let's consider two other factors. Comfort food is 7 out of 10 and so are Comfort Games. Metroidvanias became that for me as a genre and Chasm looks like a delightful diversion from all these superb titles coming out.

4. Feudal Alloy

Another decent non-linear platformer with rpg elements on my list. This one earned its spot with the unique combination of theme and graphic style. It's just lovely looking.

5. and 6. Banner Sagas

I like tactics games and for some reason the story of Banner Saga still appeals to me. I want to play through it and see how much I will have to sacrifice and to which end. 

7. Expedition: Vikings

Expedition: Conquistador is one of the most underrated tactics games. It's because fights themselves are little less involved that the rest of game. You play with a flawed crew, which forces you into bad decisions all the time. I heard great thing about it in an episode of 3MA dedicated to Vikings.

8. Bad North: Jotunn Edition

Bad North is purty and it looks like delightful, smart little game made with minimalism on mind.

9. Titan Souls

To be totally honest, this one's on the list for graphics. They're great and I really appreciate selection of browns and greys, which are dominant, but without an effect of the game looking lifeless.

10. Samurai Gunn

I talked about this game many times. It looks pretty, it sounds amazing with the soundtrack from Doseone. The trailer is my favourite video game trailer of all times and the gameplay looks like fun if you have couch and friends, who enjoy games.

11. Nantucket

It's all about the theme of whale fishing and the swag this gem has. Mechanically it seems to be quite a journey too. I enjoyed FTL and this is building upon some of its mechanics, but makes it less about surviving and more about chaining successful hunts, methinks.

12. Dishonored

The last game from the row of giants and whales is the single first person modern AAA title I crave to play. Architecture and world-building in the series are exceptional and the whole design reminds me of Half-Life, the best shooter of all times.

13. Ultraworld

A weirdly available commercial piece from the creators of Secret Habitat, one of my favourite walking sims and my favourite digital gallery. Obviously, this can't be removed.

14. Koma

I wasn't interested in this atmospheric roaming game at first but the more I heard and saw, the more hooked I got. I don't care about the mystery being second tier. The atmosphere is dripping from screenshot and that's enough (btw can't run it, so it's of lower priority).

15. Californium

I like that it's a French game about America inspired by an American. I remember people talking about it quite fondly, when it was released. Californium is weird and colorful and filled with things to take a picture of.

16. Crying Suns

An upcoming game published by Humble Bundle. The hook is that it takes FTL and battles from games such a Homeworld and stories such as Dune and meshes it all together. If it turns out to be any good, this might be my next time submarine.

Steam

The third and last list has 22 items and more than a half of them are metroid inspired designs. Both released and upcoming.  I curated this list a lot in the past as some of my friends can see it and I felt little embarrassed, when it was reaching over 100 items. Truth to be said, I bought most of these items meanwhile. Now let's see what I can do about the rest.By the end of 2019 I would love this list to consist only from Symphony of the Night clones.

1. Knights and Bikes

I bragged about this one a lot recently. Just scroll down for more. It's number one, because it's the next game I'm buying (unless sales).

2. Legendary Gary

I really hope I will find funds and time and play what could be the Bojack Horseman of nerds. The trailer for this game deeply resonated with the situation I've been for several last years and I think the game can have a deep impact on me if the writings as good as its soundtrack.

3. Anodyne 2: Return to Dust

Ok, one more time. Anodyne was unique and the sequel looks great in its low poly glory and promises to be bigger and better.

4. The Eternal Castle

The trailer for this one's stylish. I watched it at least five times in a row. But it doesn't tell a whole lot about the game and It's possible that the intro is the best part of the game. It probably will leave my list. 5. INFRA

Infra is s a puzzle game made in source (half-life engine, the best engine). Basically it all starts as a surveillance of pipes and ends up with you uncovering a conspiracy. What attracts me to it are beautiful environments and some well remembered textures and it should perform great on my rustworthy laptop. Also, I read great things about it on RPS before it became a completely different site.

6-22. Non-linear platformers

I won't be buying or playing any of these this or the next year. But 2022 should be a year for them to thrive. I will feature here some of them in a foreseeable future as some of them are pretty interesting and maybe make a comprehensive piece on castleoids for Christmas. The list goes: Axiom Verge, Timespinner, Chasm, Feudal Alloy, Visual Out, Redo!, Gato Roboto, Grizzland, Monster Boy and the Cursed Kingdom, Eagle Island, Minoria, Witch and 66 Mushrooms, Refoil, Nykra, Outbuddies, Biomass, Divinium

And that used to be my wishlist. I don’t know why I had such a sudden urge to make an article about it, but here it is and now I can delete some of these items without regret and always look back here if I need to find them.

[jeffsalbumoftheweek]

The Bitter Roots Waning Days Interview

As it happens, my would be band, The Bitter Roots will be releasing our 5th Album, Waning Days, on October 27th.  Whenever I put out a new album I like to blog a few words for those lucky few that may have the time or inclination to read more about what went into making the album.  Despite what some folks may believe, it does not take 3 minutes to record and produce a 3 minute song.  An album usually takes me a few years to write and record.  Art is the labor of love.  So if you might indulge me...

This time around, instead of aimlessly ambling on of my own account, I thought it would be fun to do an interview.  With all the fake news floating around out there, who better to trust, who better to conduct this important interview, than my old friend Yale Kaul.   All star drummer, fellow Missoulian, Go Griz, former moderator of the most excellent pre-social media blog Yalestar, and also a frequent contributor to the former Missoula music scene, fanzine, Shat Upon.  So take it away it Yale, give me your best shot.  Order Up.

Y: Congratulations on the new album. What is this, your fourth or fifth one with this band?

J: Thank you.  Yes, this is the 5th full length TBRs record in 10 years now.  I really like to stay busy writing new songs.  I love to make and record new music, and so does Ben.

Y: Where's that on the cover? It looks like Central Washington perhaps? 

J: You have a keen eye.  That photo was taken looking due north off the I-90 overpass at the Templins exit just east of Ritzville.  I took it through the windshield with a cell phone.  I was driving back to Seattle by myself shortly after the death of my Mother in Law as it so happened.  I think the image captures the state of our crumbling and adrift former American Empire rather nicely.

Y: Is our crumbling empire a theme of the album overall?

J: You know, at first it was, because the album started to come together around the tracks Informed Consent, I am Nobody and Cuddly cats.  We had been jamming those out live quite a bit before they went to tape.  They are all pretty dark on subject matter lyrically, heavy rock sounds, and you have to remember this album was recorded in the 1st 6 months after the disastrous election.  But as we added more tunes to the album I think it went more from the Dark to the Light. 

Y: About that baritone guitar: is this the first time you've used one on an album?

J: It is.  For the uninitiated a regular guitar has a 25 1/2" long neck and is generally in standard tuning of EADGBE. The Baritone has a considerably longer neck, mine is 28 5/8" and is tuned to CFA#D#GC.  The main driver for it is to create more space in the mix for my vocal range, which tends to have more contention with standard tuning.  Also tuning down 2 full steps from E to C allows me to appear to have a larger upper vocal range, it is easier to hit the high notes when you tune down.  Led Zep did that for that last big reunion show to make it easier for Robert Plant to sing some of their tunes.  As you age, there is no escape for it, your vocal register tunes lower.

Y: Yeah, your voice definitely sounds lower, especially on the first song. So do you guys play live as a two-piece, i.e. bassless? If so, I'd imagine the baritone guitar can fill in a lot of the lower frequencies?

J: We have played out as a duo quite a bit, but not in 6 years, because we had bass players.  I have played the baritone out as a trio and it sounds rad.  For the Duo live, the best rig we came up with is an Acoustic brand 100 watt head, a mesa 4x12 slant cab, using just my acoustic guitars which are a '78 Guild F50 and a '87 Guild JF-55. Those are big concert grand guitars, it can be hard to manage the feedback live, but we dialed it in a few times to good crowd effect.  Neither us much prefer the duo live, there is something about needing that separate low end to really lock with the drum kit, we prefer it with 3 pieces and 2 voices.  I also have a lot of harmonies I need someone to sing with me for the full intended effect in the live setting.

Y: The recording itself sounds very pro! You guys did the whole thing in your home studio right?

J: Thank you.  We do the tracking in my studio which is 24 track tape, it is a good sized studio, it takes up the entire basement of my house.  It has separate rooms for guitars and drums as well as a control room.  Then we take the tape and the machine to Studio Litho where we dump it to pro tools and mix it down from 24 tracks to stereo 2 track using Litho's gorgeous vintage API console.  We do no digital editing or correcting, nor do we use any auto tuning.  We master the mix as well at a separate room that is now called Resonant here in Seattle, where final volume level and EQ adjustments are made on the stereo mix down.  The advantage to tracking at my place is that we can do it as many times as we like because we are not on the clock, under pressure, spending money to use another room.

Y: So when we were younger men, back in the Burnin' 80s™, I knew you were big into Hendrix, Bad Brains, Soundgarden. Obviously your music palate has developed over the years. What's turning your crank these days?

J: Excellent Punk Rock Talk question right there.  I try to check out newer stuff as much as I can.  There is a rock band from Scotland, Biffy Clyro, they sell out arenas in Europe in minutes, they are very very talented, and fun to see live too.  There is a band from Bend OR called Larry and his Flask.  They are the craziest punk bluegrass rag time rockabilly thing.  The Rev Horton Heat are big fans of those guys too, we saw Larry open for both The Rev and Fishbone, so that is saying something right there, they do fish style durges too, its super cool.  But with streaming, I have been able to delve deeply into catalogs of one artist or another.  We could not dream of such access as kids when records were 7 bucks, that was a lot of money back then.  Renting at Rudy's was what 2 bucks?  With streaming I can listen to for instance lately in chronological order as I prefer, the entire back catalogs of Steely Dan, Tom Petty, David Bowie, B-52s, REM.  All the Fat Wreck chords bands Strung out and Lagwagon, those are great bands.  Stiff little Fingers, Smiths, System of A Down, Audioslave, Rage and others.

Y: Also, Ben: he and I went to high school together, although I never knew him back then (he's 3 years ahead). Where's he coming from musically? Is his use of the traditional drum grip any indication? [I may have that wrong, but I thought I recalled him using that grip in early Silkworm shows... And is he involved much in the song smithing?

J: Ben has super eclectic tastes in music.  He loves the Rock, loves to play Rock, also a huge Soundgarden fan, Tool, Stone Temple Pilots etc... But he also listens to a lot of classical and plays a lot of classical music on the piano as well, J.S Bach is his favorite, he also follows all the session drummer dudes and he goes to the clinics and demos they do in music stores when they come around Seatown, guys like JoJo Mayer for instance.  He switches his grips depending on his mood or the song, he also switches at will, left and right handed orientation to the snare and hi hat, sometimes in mid tune, he is that good.  In albums past I have gotten some fine keyboard parts and bass parts from him as well, but for this record I did all the music and words and then as always we collaborate on the drum parts, the tempo and the final arrangements.

Y: So the album is called Waning Days, which immediately reminded me of the book "Dark Age Ahead," Jane Jacobs' last book before she died, where she goes deep on five areas where the west (but mostly the US) is pretty much clusterfucking itself into oblivion (culture-wise, financial, higher education, climate, etc). The book is just over 10 years old and it's looking more and more like she was spot-on. HOWEVER: it must be noted that aside from the album title and cover photo, there's not a real pessimistic outlook in the songs, or at least not that I could detect. So I ask you: am I missing some overarching theme of cultural and institutional decline among the songs?

J: Perhaps.  Track 1 Informed Consent is a song about sexual assault and in particular the demise of Bill Cosby, and Trump pussy grabbing, so there is that.  Track 2 I am nobody is about how as you age and your youthful self aggrandized importance in society wanes, as you just become another average Joe going to the mall and getting loaded too often, the lament of many as you grind into middle age and realize, yup, this is it, this is living, this is all there is.  Whatever you make it or can afford to make it.  Track 4 Cuddly Cats is a direct statement against the music business and the music business in the internet age, where music itself has become window dressing after thought for other commercial ventures, where kitties get more attention than actual artists trying to convey a meaningful message, where fake and sexy imagery is all that matters, trying to sell you stupid crap you don't need anyway.  Those messages are there in the lyrics, however subtle.  So there is some darkness but on the whole the message of the record is counter.  Yeah we are in some Waning Days, but there is hope and light, all is not lost.

Y: You've been at this a long time. Inasmuch as you're able to say, what are some of the lessons you've learned about navigating the music industry, especially now as a man in his 40s with a job and family and so forth? Obviously until about the 2000s people still made a living playing music, but now that number is vanishingly small, and those people make most of their money playing live shows and slinging merch. But at least nowadays it's easier than ever to at least get your stuff out there, right? So what's a person to do?

J: I have never had a record deal, never had a manager or an agent, and although I have played a ton of shows and used to promote out of town shows even in Missoula back in the day, recorded now 11 albums, I never felt like I was part of the music industry.  I have never made any real money from music. I think of myself the same way I am pretty sure most of my good friends think of me too as just an artist and a huge music fan, a recording artist. 

There is no budget in the music industry anymore.  Floyd, our Mix and Master friend of many years now, he is one of 2 guys left in Seattle makes a living just recording people as a hired engineer on a project.   There is no investment in new talent anymore.  Way way back for instance, Journey put out 3 records before they got Steve Perry and then became huge.  Today no record company would give you budget for 3 records in the hopes you hit on the 4th one, no way.  You would be surprised how little playing live pays these days as well, even for artists with hits in their back catalogs.  There are only a few corporations that control nearly every live venue of any size in the entire country who book pre-paid package tours at venue capacities of 250 all the way to 40,000 people.  These companies take a lions share of the revenue, especially in the smaller rooms.  It is corporate parasitic control of the medium and the media, fuck them all.

Despite the relative ease of self publishing these days, It may surprise you that It is not really easier to 'get your stuff out there' anymore because of the complete information overload now, music is just 1s and 0s just like all other commodified information, entertainment and or otherwise.  It is just not worth much anymore because there is just too damn much of it out there, new and back catalog alike. A small needle in a million haystacks.  You can have the #1 record in America buy selling a mere 50k copies in a week.  To contrast, when Nevermind came out in the weeks to follow they were selling 100K an hour, dig it.

So the thing to do is just to be your creative self and do it because you love to do it, because it is a part of you, and be glad you don't have the pressures of an industry telling you what you should sound like.  If you don't get famous in your 20s, chances are, you are not going to get famous playing rock music, so just don't worry about it, don't quit, keep playing, keep creating.  As Tolkein said in the beginning there was light, and there was music.  We are of light and music.  There will always be new songs to write and share.

Y: Well yeah, by  'get your stuff out there' I meant anyone can put their entire creative output somewhere where 3+ billion people could potentially get it, and with very little upfront capital outlay, but then of course it's effectively commodified. And whether anyone ends up giving a shit... that's another matter of course. It's a paradox of unforseen consequences.  

J: Totally.

Y: Well hell, I don't have any other specific questions other than the usual "what's next for the Bitter Roots?" So what's next for the Bitter Roots? Any other hard-fought wisdom you'd like to impart to other independent artists, or to the world in general?

J: What is next for us is more songs and more recording.  We have already started in on a new set, probably take a few years to put out.  No shows planned at this time, maybe in the future, who knows.  I don't have any profound words of wisdom other than, as an independent artist trust your own judgement and don't worry too much about external validation, cause these days the state of shit is as hollow as Facebook.  Stay positive, Trump's days are numbered and we the good, the meek, the thoughtful, the artistic and domestic alike will rise again and steer us all toward a more equitable future in the fashion of MLK and Obama.

[cutiecrates]

Cutie Reviews: Tokyo Treat Jan 19

“We said burr, it’s cold in here and there’s some delicious snacks in the atmosphere! We got our cheer set to celebrate the upcoming New Year and winter season. To help set the mood for the upcoming year, we decided to help spread some happiness with a fun Winter Wonderland themed snack box! Expect to find a lot of fun snacks that will keep a smile on your face as you enjoy the winter wonderland weather that is coming up. Our idea was to find snacks that will keep you feeling happy and warm on the inside no matter if you are cuddling up indoors or are out enjoying the brisk weather!“

Parade Milkshake & Nerunerune DIY

As usual, I will be covering the DIY in a separate post; but for anyone unfamiliar, Nerunerune is one of the most popular and well-loved DIY candy kits one can find online or in Japan. It has come in many variations and has evolved over the years, and in this box we could get one of the most simpler kits they have released, featuring a fluffy whip-like candy fluff with candies.

Our main feature in this pic is the drink, the Parade Milkshake. This drink contains egg and milk, and is meant to emulate an actual milkshake, but with a thin milk consistency. Each can is only 47kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ 

Because it’s been in the fridge, the can has been extremely cold- it’s perfect for summer! The flavor sort of makes me think of winter (and pudding, and McDonalds ice cream)... but at the same time, I think it would have been “too chilly“ to really enjoy during winter. Unless you enjoy being cold, which I do.

It tastes really good, I was kind of surprised because I wasn’t really sure what to expect. I’m pretty sure I mentioned this before, but lately I haven’t been into pudding due to an “incident“ where I got sick for a week, and I’m not into milk either; but I really liked this. It didn’t bother my “milk sensitivity“ either.

Cotton Candy

This is probably the one item in the box that actually did give me “winter vibes“. You get that too right? But it also fits summer too since you see it a lot during summer at fairs and festivals.

Anyway, we have some kawaii cotton candy as our next item :3 Now, according to the package it did expire back in April, but it seemed fine. This bag of cotton candy is 46kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ 

I LOVE cotton candy~ But I’m pretty partial, I prefer it have some flavor other than just sugar. That and it’s white color just made me feel bored. Another hindrance is that like any other cotton candy, once opened it begins to harden to the point of being inedible- so you need to keep it closed up tight.

Meanwhile, the package is absolutely adorable~

Custard Chocolate Bar & Balanced Nutrition Chocolate Brownie Bar

Anyone whose been a reader of this blog will probably recognize both of these items/brands. But lets remain optimistic :P

Our first item is a Gudetama themed chocolate bar featuring a chocolate and custard flavoring. The bar consists of two tin wafers with layers of chocolate cream between them, a white layer on the top wafer, followed by the custard layer, giving the chocolate. Each bar is 115kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

I’ve been pretty tired of these since they always seem to be the same to me, but I didn’t really mind this one very much. It was actually pretty good, but that might have just been because the regular chocolate flavor overwhelmed the entire thing.

Our next item is the Kinosei (health snack) of the month, a chocolate brownie bar from Glico. This nutritional bar is packed with various vitamins and minerals to keep one feeling energized throughout the day. 

Each bar is 98kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥

It was okay, nothing too special to me. It did remind me a lot of a brownie, but had an off-putting after taste I wasn’t very fond of. I also can’t guarantee the whole “energizing“ thing works since I ate it in pieces and I finished it now, half-asleep.

Lucky Taiyaki Snack & Giant Chocolate Bar

If you didn’t realize it yet, this box was filled with chocolate. Not necessarily a bad move or anything- but (as much as I dislike it) maybe they should have done white chocolate to fit the season more?

Our next item is a Taiyaki, which again you’ve probably seen on this blog numerous times. For anyone unfamiliar, taiyaki is a fish-shaped cookie or pancake-like dough snack filled with chocolate, fruit, cream, or red beans. These specific snack ones are filled with airy, bubbled chocolate to give it a very light and crispy texture that melts in your mouth.

The brand who made this one is Meito, and each fish is 88kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ 

I love eating these, it’s a 10 out of 10 delicious would recommend snack. It has a light sweetness to it and the chocolate taste lingers in your mouth for a little while after eating.

Our next item is this very impressively size chocolate “puff bar“. It contains peanuts and is coated in both them and chocolate, so it’s not a snack for anyone with peanut allergies- I hate peanuts so I wasn’t too sure how I would feel about it personally.

The entire bar is 162kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥

It’s actually not terrible. I love the crispiness and the chocolate is there, but it has a strong bitterness that I suspect might be peanut, and I can’t say I like it too much- but it’s not bad? But eating a segment of it was enough for me, and I found myself giving it to someone else.

Strawberry Tiramisu Kit Kats & Crunchy Panda Cookies

At this point we are now reaching the last of the chocolate products for this box. First up we have another party pack bag of Panda Cookies :3 I love these, they’re super-cute and they taste good. For anyone who may not recognize these, these are chocolate molded into various panda expressions (70 in total!), with a “panda-esque“ cookie behind the chocolate, giving it a crunchy and sweet taste. 

These are by Kabaya and are pretty common to find online. They even have DIY kits (which I did try before, it was pretty fun). The party bag consists of 6 packs, each featured various designs, puzzles, or comics. They also support protecting panda bears from endangerment.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ 

I’d like to say I was biased because I love panda bears, but they do taste really good too. You get crunchiness from the cookie, and the chocolate tastes like both milk and white chocolate. Again I’d recommend these.

Our other item (also a party bag) is the special strawberry tiramisu kit kat. This flavor is special as the #1 voted Want To Try Flavor worldwide to celebrate kit kats 45th anniversary.

Each pack is 64kcal, and features the sweet and sour flavors of a strawberry with a light, smooth coffee mixed in.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ 

First of all I’d like to say that as “charming“ as its meant to be, I kinda find the art on this pack to be repulsive. I don’t know why, it just looks so weird and goofy to me. I wish they had gone for something more... food-ish, to bring out the appeal of the flavors.

It looks like a white chocolate, but it tastes strongly of strawberries, so I love the flavor. But you just barely get the “smooth coffee“ flavor it describes, so I wouldn’t call it 100% accurate.

Savory Wheat Crackers & Cheese Umaibo

Now, onto the savories; there was surprisingly a handful of them. I say surprisingly because this is the second month in a row where the box had a balance of sweet and savory (not counting the drink or DIY), I really wish they kept this trend up.

Anyway, we have a pack of 2 wheat “crackers“, featuring salt and natural oils from Okinawa to give them a savory salt taste. The “Snack Menu” in the pamphlet says the bunny’s image plays a part in their “winter” theme. But to me the flowers automatically give me summer vibes. Again.

What makes this snack concerning is that for just 2 of these, it’s 405kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ 

I’ve never been huge on wheat, but I grew up on it whenever I was at my grandmas so I got used to it. But these don’t even taste like wheat. They’re crunchy and salty, and kind of remind me a bit of a cone.

I like these, but the huge calorie count is a big turn-off. Only because I think for such a high count, you’re better off eating something filling; these aren’t enough to get someone through the day until their next meal, unless they eat really small portions normally.

The next item I won’t be reviewing because I’ve gotten it several times, and have reviewed it several times. I’ll make this short :P I’ve never been a big fan of the cheese umaibo, but I find the more I eat it the better it tastes oddly enough. It didn’t exactly taste like cheese to me when I tried it, but now I can say it actually does.

Salty Seaweed Puffs & Shrimp Sticks

The coloring for these two items actually look very different in person. First will be the Seaweed Puffs, made from salt and rice with a sprinkling of seaweed flakes to blend the flavors together.

Rating: ♥ ♥

The flavor is pretty light, I can’t say the salt taste is stronger than that in the wheat crackers. I was kind of disappointed that the seaweed flavor was really light too. They’re not bad though, the texture is pretty nice, but they are already kind of stale and it makes their appeal even... lesser.

Our other item is the share pack Shrimp Sticks by Calbee. These we’ve gotten before so I don’t think I’ll be rating them again; but I will say that each bag is 31kcal, and because of their small size you get a decent amount of them per-serving. I actually like these because the fishy taste is light, and I enjoy the crispy texture.

Black Pepper Chips

Our final item are these pepper-flavored chips by Koikeya, a popular chip brand known for coming up with some unique flavors. We’ve seen it a few times in Tokyo Treat, but this is a new flavor to grace our presence.

Each bag is 283kcal.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Seeing these, I was very excited to try them because when I was younger, I loved eating pepper chips (or salt and pepper chips, I don’t remember), and I really like pepper sauce, which the scent of these strongly reminded me of.

While they smell of pepper, they taste strongly of it too :D and instantly kick in the spice as you eat them. Strangely, I get a “jerky“ taste too from these, but I love jerky so I’m not complaining at all. The chips are crunchy and delicious~

♥ Cutie Ranking ♥

Content - 4.5 out of 5. There was only one item I wasn’t very fond of, but I didn’t find it unbearable and could tolerate eating it. The drink was good, I love the DIY kit we got and am excited to make it next. There was some repetition in this box though...

Theme - 2 out of 5. I’m probably giving it pity points honestly, I feel bad in saying this but I can barely see the theme they were going for. A lot of it oddly gave me summer vibes- but it’s entirely possible that I’m feeling it because it is summer now...

Total Rank: 7 out of 10. The items were tasty but there wasn’t too much special about the box because I was used to so much of it already, I also kind of wished they had toned down the chocolate or given us something fruity- besides the DIY. I also failed to see the theme, which I feel a bit disappointed about. I’m really hoping next months box isn’t too chocolate oriented (and again I am a chocolate addict, so that’s really saying something), but considering its the Valentines Day box...

♥ Cutie’s Scale of Yummy ♥

1. Pepper Chips - they smelled delicious and tasted even better! Extremely would recommend!

2. Strawberry Tiramisu kit kats - It might not contain both flavors described (at least to me) but I LOVE the strong, overwhelming strawberry taste~

3. Cheese Umaibo - Every time I eat this, I end up liking it more than last time. The first time I tried it I didn’t like it at all, and now I kind of enjoy it :P if you’re like me I’d suggest giving it a few tries and see if your opinion changes like mine did.

4. Panda Cookies - As much as I like these... a small part of me is kind of tired of them. Granted it has been some time since I last had them, but...

5. Taiyaki Snack - I love the crispy texture mixed with the melty chocolate~

6. Milkshake Drink - Going in, I wasn’t sure what to expect other than some kind of malty drink; but it wasn’t like that at all. It had a really strong vanilla-pudding-ice cream taste

7. Cotton Candy - I really like cotton candy but I’m not into the plain sugar variant. I prefer flavor. 

8. Gudetama Bar - Oddly the flavor was pretty good this time, usually I’m not too crazy about these bars. Maybe it’s growing on me.

9. Wheat Crackers - I liked these more than I thought I would, but they were still kind of boring in comparison to everything else.

10. Shrimp Sticks - I’m not huge on seafood (unless it’s sushi) but these are pretty good. As much as I complain about light flavors, I think here it works for the snack.

11. Brownie Bar - It was okay, I didn’t really have too much of an opinion...

12. Seaweed Puffs -  I was really disappointed these didn’t have a stronger flavor.

13. Chocolate Puff Bar - It wasn’t bad, but as I said, I’m not big on peanuts and I really didn’t find myself wanting more after a few bites.  

[jasonbehrs]

i wanna read every word

by airauralintensity (aka me, jasonbehrs!)

“Have you ever fallen in love with someone you’ve never met?” “Uh, do you mean like we’ve-been-doing-long-distance-slash-online-dating or like I’ve-been-crushing-on-the-cute-barista-at-the-library-cafe?” “Ummm, more like I’ve-read-their-poems-and-sure-they’re-very-talented-but-their-handwriting-alone-makes-me-smile.” “... That’s oddly specific.”

fandom: kpop, super junior characters: eunhyuk, ryeowook; guest appearances by the rest of sj-m and yesung ship: eunwook genre: romantic comedy themes: alternate endings, strangers to lovers, handwriting, identity reveal setting: college chapter: 1/4 word count: 3.7k

read it below or on ffnet, aff, wattpad

chapter 1: the beginning

A/N (5.31.2021): Back with another Super Junior fanfic! Rom-coms aren't really my thing, so this was such a challenge yet so fun to write. I was inspired by Ryeowook's One and Only music video, the fact that he hand-wrote letters to ELF every single month he was enlisted, the fact that he keeps every letter he’s ever been given even after antis used it as a means of sending him targeted hate. 🥺 He clearly cherishes handwritten things, and he just seems like the kind of person that would find meaning in people's handwriting. Thus this fic was born!

Rating for mild language and suggestive instances. Title comes from You Wrote the Book on Love by the Backstreet Boys. Cover art by me. If you recognise anything, that means I don't own it. This story will have two alternate endings. Updates on Sundays. Many thanks to Amy for being my beta!

~~~

Henry cancels their lunch plans at the last minute, which is just fine by him. Ryeowook is in no position to turn down an impromptu opportunity to study, not with a quiz tomorrow for which he is woefully underprepared. He just grabs a to-go wrap from the dining hall and heads for his next class's building. If he recalled correctly, the room that held his noon lecture should be empty right now.

He's right. He happily climbs up to the rear right quadrant of the lecture hall, beelining for what he considers his seat. He is, after all, a devout practitioner of the same seats code of conduct.

He pushes aside the loosely crumpled up piece of paper right on the desk, probably left there by the previous student, and lets himself get lost in his notes from two Evolution of Diet lectures ago.

It isn't until someone takes their seat a few chairs down from him that Ryeowook realised just how much time passed by. He checks his watch then eyes the crumbled pieces of paper around his notebook, casualties from previous attempts to create a study guide. The professor is due to start the class at any minute, so he hurriedly stuffs the paper into his backpack for later recycling.

Unfortunately, Ryeowook does that a lot.

Later, he finds himself sat by his apartment's recycling bin, opening up the backlog of miscellaneous papers one by one to ensure there's nothing he needs from them before throwing them out. They're just the standard class handouts, old notes, whatever.

That is, until he unfolds a page to be greeted with words that are not his own in handwriting that is definitely not his.

I'm thinking of you more today I wonder how tomorrow morning will be Will I miss you more than I do today?

Um, what?!

Ryeowook frantically looks through the remaining pieces of paper in his bag, trying to find anything else like it, but he comes up with nothing.

His mind goes into overdrive, trying to think of a logical explanation for why such a romantic note is in his bookbag, but his traitorously hopeless mind keeps coming back to one conclusion: he has a secret admirer.

"What'cha got there?" his flatmate, Mi, asks when he comes out of his room to find Ryeowook intensely staring at a wrinkled piece of paper while sitting on his haunches by the recycling bin.

Ryeowook falls back on his butt in surprise. "N-Nothing!"

Mi, the pleasant-to-a-fault person he is, gives a winsome smile despite the obvious lie—"If you say so."—before continuing to the kitchen to make a snack.

Ryeowook hastily stuffs the note into his pocket and zips up his backpack. He'll resume this ritual next time his bag is stuffed to the brim. For now, he has other things to focus on. His study guide for tomorrow's quiz is still only half-finished, after all.

Unfortunately, the allure of a secret admirer only lasts for two more days.

When he shows up for his next noon lecture, he sees another crumpled up note by his seat, and he distantly remembers how he found one just like it the last time he had this class. In a valiant attempt to listen to his professor, he manages to ignore it for all of seven minutes before he couldn't fight his curiosity anymore.

It is with bittersweet disappointment that he recognises the handwriting before him.

Take your beautiful smile with you Don't leave it here You saw me with tears in my eyes

The words written on the page thoroughly crush the idea that the poem he memorised before was intended for him—what kind of secret admirer writes a break-up poem for the person they admire to find?—but he lets it go as quickly as the idea originally came to him.

Without the thrill of secrecy overpowering his judgement, Ryeowook has only fondness. Whoever this person is, their work is good, and they've got endearing handwriting to boot.

He feels a little bit shady when he slips the paper into his binder so that he can unite it with its distant cousin back home, but he firmly squashes that feeling down. Whoever left this behind won't be missing it.

When he does it again five days later, and again the next time after that, and keeps doing it every time he sees the tell-tale crumpled paper on his desk, he just accepts that he has suspicious tendencies and maybe a crush.

~If I ain't got you, my kiss is just needless extravagance.~

When Yesung finally arrives at the cafeteria, he's bickering with someone Ryeowook has never met. He watches curiously as the pair approaches where he is sitting. Yesung looks really annoyed, but the new person has a gummy smile painted wide across his face.

"Can you leave now? I'm meeting up with my friends for lunch." Yesung gestures impatiently towards Ryeowook, but the newcomer seats himself. "Cool, what are we having?"

"Who are you?" Ryeowook asks plainly and without formality, having no problem helping his hyung get rid of someone that's clearly bothering him.

The stranger merely offers a charming grin and a friendly hand in response. "Nice to meet you, my name is Hyukjae. Frankly, I'm a rap genius," he introduces with absolutely no shame.

Yesung facepalms.

Ryeowook laughs in his face, high and bright, thoroughly unimpressed with the newcomer's boldness. Hyukjae smoothly retracts his hand, but the grin doesn't waver.

Neither does his determination to stay.

"Who's the new guy," Kyuhyun asks without interest as he seats himself at the table with his food. Mi and Henry are not far behind.

"A nuisance," Yesung complains as he rubs his fingers into his temples.

"Oooohh! We have a new friend?" Mi asks excitedly.

"I'm guessing Yesung brought him?" Henry asks as he bites into his food.

"He followed me like a stray, and now he's at this table begging for scraps."

"Hey, I resent that analogy," Hyukjae speaks up for the first time since the whole friend group gathered. "I thought our friendship was a little more symbiotic than that. You're the whale, and I'm the little fish that's suctioned onto you for dear life."

"I gain nothing from this friendship," Yesung maintains.

"Did you know those fish don't hang on by their mouths but by a separate suction cup organ on their stomachs?" Henry says to the blank, weirded-out, or surprised faces of his friends. "Like, you think it would be their mouths, but no it's a whole other special thing."

"Oh, so that's what you're doing when you're too busy to text back?" Ryeowook snarks. "Watching marine biology documentaries?"

Henry shrugs. "It's just something I know."

"Speaking of, how do you guys know each other?" Mi directs the conversation back to Hyukjae and Yesung.

"He TA'ed for my Vocal Performance class last year—ah, I'm a dance major, but I'm gonna declare a performing arts minor," Hyukjae adds as an aside, "Anyway, he was the only one who held office hours when I was free, so we saw a lot of each other back then. We've been best friends ever since." Hyukjae ends with an arm slung around Yesung's shoulder and a cheesy grin.

"I thought I'm your best friend," Kyuhyun whines.

Yesung shrugs Hyukjae's arm off. "We crossed paths on my way here, then he just invited himself along after I told him I had plans. We're barely friends," he clarifies with a glare at Hyukjae. The other pouts exaggeratedly, and Yesung rolls his eyes before turning his glare onto Kyuhyun. "And if anyone at this table would be my best friend, it would be Wookie."

"If I had a best friend at this table, it would also be Wookie," Henry adds just to annoy Kyuhyun.

"I guess you're the person to know, huh?" Hyukjae directs to Ryeowook with a grin. "Good thing I'm already on his good side," he comments offhandedly as he takes a sip of his drink.

Ryeowook snorts. "Since when were you on my good side?"

"I made him laugh earlier before you guys all got here," Hyukjae explains to the rest of the table. Mi gives him an encouraging thumbs up.

"I was laughing at you."

"The ego perceives no difference," Hyukjae assures.

Ryeowook stares at him incredulously, but he can feel the amused smile that pulls at his lips without his command. Hyukjae shoots him finger guns in response, and Ryeowook just shakes his head and takes a bite of his food.

"So now that we've established a hierarchy, what are y'all's names?" Hyukjae asks brightly.

~Out of the plain people who will be forgotten in a matter of seconds, I know you're different.~

Between Mi's hospitality mode that he can't ever seem to shut off and Ryeowook's nutrition courses that totally upped his cooking game, their apartment is the de facto hangout spot for their friend circle.

Just because they're together doesn't mean they're doing the same thing, however, another de facto manifestation of their friendship. They're all eating the meal that Ryeowook prepared for dinner, but Yesung, Mi, and Henry are watching a movie (well, Henry's on his phone, but he's on the couch with them and sometimes glances up, which is basically the same thing) while Kyuhyun and Ryeowook are doing homework at the kitchen table.

At least, Kyuhyun is. "What are you even working on?" he asks after observing Ryeowook 'work' for the past few minutes.

Ryeowook hastily shuts his notebook shut. "Nothing!"

"It's probably not nothing," Henry remarks without looking up from his phone.

"It's probably related to why he was reading homework next to the recycling bin last week," Mi offers in a vastly misguided attempt to be helpful.

"What does that even mean," Yesung deadpans.

Ryeowook is too busy trying to fend off Kyuhyun's annoyingly persistent hands from getting access to his notebook to respond to the conversation at the other end of the apartment. "Why are you so long!" he wails.

Mi sighs and gets up from the couch, easily swiping the notebook from Ryeowook's grip but refusing to hand it to Kyuhyun.

"But Ryeowook-hyung is keeping secrets!" Kyuhyun complains.

"Ryeowook is allowed to keep secrets," Mi explains like an underpaid teacher.

"Not in this friend group, he isn't." Yesung paused the movie when Mi got up from the couch, and now he's figuratively and physically siding with Kyuhyun.

Finding the antics of his friends more interesting than whatever was on his phone, Henry gets up to join them. "Might as well tell us now," he says to Ryeowook while leaning an elbow on the older's shoulder which Ryeowook promptly shrugs off.

He looks around to his friends looking at him with various levels of interest and expectation, and he sighs in defeat. "Have you ever fallen in love with someone you've never met?"

"Uh, do you mean like we've-been-doing-long-distance-slash-online-dating or like I've-been-crushing-on-the-cute-barista-at-the-library-cafe?" Henry clarifies.

"Ummm, more like I've-read-their-poems-and-sure-they're-very-talented-but-their-handwriting-alone-makes-me-smile."

"... That's oddly specific," Kyuhyun breaks the silence.

Ryeowook flounders for a second, debating with himself if he's ready to go this far, then decides screw it and hurries into his room and back out to his friends with a book. "See for yourself," he says as he lays the book on the table.

"They just kept appearing, so I kept reading them, then I started saving them, and now I'm, sorta, crushing on whoever this person is," he narrates as the others flip through what turns out to be a scrapbook—a literal scrapbook for the scraps of paper he finds, with dates and a little passage next to each paper entry of his first impressions of the work.

"The words themselves can be so romantic or witty or silly, but there's just something about the handwriting," he effuses. "I look at the way the words slant and how the letters bleed into each other, and… I don't know. It makes me feel like I know this person, whoever they are."

"I don't know which is more pathetic: the fact that you managed to fall in love with handwriting or the fact that you're interpreting actual Korean out of this chicken scratch."

Mi ignores Henry's comment. "And this notebook is…?" He holds up the book he had pilfered from Ryeowook. The latter looks up, to the side, to the TV, anywhere to avoid looking at his friends when he confesses, "My attempts at answering them back through poetry."

Yesung snorts. "What do you know about poetry?"

"Nothing," Ryeowook pouts as he stomps, "which is why I would like my notebook back, please, before meaner eyes than yours look through it." He directs the last half of his thought to Mi, who nods understandingly and returns the book to him. Ryeowook clutches the book to his chest protectively.

"What if the writer turned out to be a guy?" Henry asks when he looks up from perusing the scrapbook. Ryeowook shrugs his shoulders sheepishly. "That wouldn't necessarily be a problem." Henry raises his eyebrows in interest. "Noted."

"What if the writer turned out to have a significant other already?" Mi points out. Ryeowook twists his mouth in a moue as he thinks. "That would suck," he says at last, "but I could at the very least tell him his work is good. If the scraps are his throwaways like I suspect they are, then what would the stuff he was actually proud of look like, you know? And if we meet, maybe we might even become friends."

"So what I'm hearing is that you're hoping it's a guy," Kyuhyun observes as he reaches for the communal bowl of shrimp congee that Ryeowook cooked for dinner, having lost interest in the whole ordeal once Ryeowook willingly offered them information.

In retaliation, Ryeowook stomps over and swipes it away before carefully pouring the last of it in Henry's bowl, steadfastly ignoring Kyuhyun's protests and the blush on his own cheeks.

~You'll be able to befriend scary things after all. I'll show off how I can blow away the loneliness.~

Ryeowook's literally minding his own business in the student union when Yesung and Hyukjae stroll up to his table. "Stored any more love notes, Wookie?" Yesung asks apropos of nothing when he sits himself down.

"Hit a B5 yet, Yesung?" Ryeowook fires back. Yesung moves to hit him, but Ryeowook's too fast and Yesung loves him too much.

"What's this about love notes?"

Ryeowook glares at Yesung, who snickers and leaves him to fend for himself. "They're not love notes," he eventually explains to Hyukjae. "They're poems, mostly about love and most likely aimed at a different person."

"And then he projects and makes believe the person is him," Yesung pipes up.

"Why did you wake up today and decide that it's my turn to get bullied?"

Hyukjae lays a hand on Ryeowook's shoulder and sends him a conspiratorial wink when the other looks his way. "Nothing wrong with being a romantic. What's the point of art if you don't draw from it what you can?"

Ryeowook considers him. "I like that. I'm stealing that."

"For what, your 'poetry'?" Yesung snorts, but the others ignore him. For his part, Hyukjae just frowns and sighs. "I'm glad someone at this school thinks I'm creative. My prof completely slammed my latest free prose assignment."

Ryeowook exaggeratedly pouts. "Poor baby."

Hyukjae looks at him, betrayed. "I thought, out of everyone at this table, you'd be the one to show me some sympathy."

"Blame Yesung. He put me in a bad mood, and misery loves company."

~Those disgusted eyes at this scale are not enough to enrage me. As long as there is silence, you will fight amongst yourselves.~

To the surprise of no one, Kyuhyun is the one to figure out a plan first.

"If Ryeowook's class is at noon, and there's no class immediately before his, it's gotta be the 8am class, right? So to find Poem Person, we just have to figure out what class meets in…" He looks to Ryeowook. "Bomnal 235," Ryeowook supplies. "Bomnal 235 on Mondays and Thursdays at 8am, and then—"

"Songwriting?" a new voice says.

"Don't you have other friends?!" complains Yesung as Hyukjae settles into their booth at the pizza parlour.

"He doesn't mean it. We like having you around," Mi assures Hyukjae as he passes him a menu.

"Speak for yourself," Yesung grumbles.

"Can we get back on track here?" Ryeowook cuts above the chatter. "Kyuhyun was about to solve the greatest mystery of my young adult life!"

"And what does the junior songwriting class have to do with that?" Hyukjae interjects.

"What do you mean?" Henry asks.

"Uh, you guys were talking about Bomnal 235 on Mondays and Thursdays at 8am? That's the junior songwriting class."

Ryeowook sits up straighter in his seat. Those aren't poems he's been finding. They're song lyrics.

"Okay so step 1 is down, what's step 2?" Henry asks Kyuhyun.

"Step 2 for what?"

"To stop Ryeowook from pining pathetically after someone he doesn't know," Yesung says.

"I know plenty about him!" Ryeowook defends.

"The gender is actually not confirmed," Mi offers to Hyukjae as an aside.

"And notice how Ryeowook doesn't dispute the 'pathetically pining' part," Kyuhyun adds on.

"Oh my god, stop talking," Ryeowook cuts in. "Let me explain," he offers to Hyukjae.

"Please."

"It's not even that big of a deal. I just have a bit of a crush on someone in the class."

"Because of the love notes," Hyukjae recalls from the conversation several days ago.

"They're poems!" Ryeowook defends on instinct. He stops and reconsiders. "Well, based on what you said, they're probably song lyrics, but yes."

Hyukjae nods. "So Step 2 was going to be…" He looks to Kyuhyun.

"Well, we'd probably have to procure a roster somehow, then we'd spend the rest of the semester staging elaborate situations to get Ryeowook to interact with these people, and hopefully Ryeowook would hate all of them enough to give up on this useless pining and give us back our hang-out times to talk about real things like my gaming tournament at the end of the month."

Henry howls with laughter, and Ryeowook gawks. "That was your plan?!" Kyuhyun puts his arms out in a what-do-you-want-from-me gesture.

"I think I have a better one," Hyukjae pipes up.

"You have a plan?" Yesung asks, a strong note of skepticism in his voice.

Hyukjae slowly meets the eyes of everyone at the table, letting the tension build just a little bit, then drops the bomb. "I'm in that class. I probably know whoever leaves you the notes."

He loves the quick and scattered intakes of breath, but the slowly growing hope on Ryeowook's face is what makes him smile. He makes a come-on gesture with his hands. "Tell me what you know."

The others groan or roll their eyes, having heard some or all of the upcoming discussion over the past few weeks. Even Mi has to politely direct his attention to his phone to avoid letting his tiredness show on his face.

Ryeowook ignores them all. "He's very detail-oriented, but he's usually focused on the next thing to work on or whatever's lingering in the future. He's so friendly—he feels all of his emotions intensely, really—and he's ruled by that more than he probably wants to be. He can be impulsive at times, but his heart is always in the right place." He ends with his chin in his palm and a sigh.

Hyukjae allows himself a moment to fully take in Ryeowook's passionate yet ultimately meaningless description. "Um, that's great, but… don't you know his name? Or appearance? Something a little more tangible for me to work with."

"The gender is still unconfirmed," Mi reminds him.

"I would recognise—" Ryewook cuts his eyes at Mi, who shrugs, "their handwriting anywhere, but something tells me that'll be as unhelpful as anything else I've said tonight."

"'I know plenty about him,'" Yesung mocks as he plays with his pizza.

Hyukjae whistles low and shakes his head. "That makes my job a little harder," he admits.

"You don't have a job," Ryeowook hurries to assure. "You don't have to help me."

"Aish, let him help you," Kyuhyun gripes. "The sooner you meet this guy, the faster you can get over him."

"The gender—" "If you say, 'The gender is unconfirmed' one more time, I'm gonna make your gender unconfirmed."

Mi blinks then just smiles at Henry, who throws himself back into his chair in exasperation.

Hyukjae slowly turns his attention away from the pair and back to Ryeowook. "I'll find a way to help, no problem," he confirms with a smile.

It's not the brightest Ryeowook has seen from the other, but it's genuine and directed at him. For now, he returns the smile with a slight blush on his cheeks and immediately prompts Kyuhyun to talk about his impending tournament.

Later, when he'll think of Hyukjae, the sight of him framed by the unflattering pizzeria decor and selflessly agreeing to a favour will be the image his brain supplies for reference.

~Sometimes what cannot be seen gives birth to unspoken understanding.~

[ladystylestores]

Top Cultural Festivals to Attend in Kenya

Do you enjoy experiencing diverse cultures? Festivals are a great place to start and this article will sample four festivals that should be in your bucket list.

Top four cultural Festivals to attend in Kenya after the Coronavirus pandemic

Kenya is well known for its breathtaking sandy beaches and wildlife.

Little is known about its cultural diversity.

The Maasai people are worldwide known, nonetheless, we have 41 other tribes in Kenya. These tribes have cultural festivals that they celebrate annually. Attending festivals is a great

way to connect with the local communities, contribute to the preservation of culture and get to experience a different way of life.

However, today I will highlight the top four cultural festivals that you must attend in your lifetime.

  Rusinga Island Festival

Rusinga Island is one of the gems of the Great Lake Victoria. It lies on the Eastern side of the lake and it has the most stunning views of the sunsets.

Rusinga Island Festival is among the famous events in the Western region of Kenya. It is usually held annually on the last Thursday and Friday before Christmas.

If you want to experience the authentic culture and traditions of the Suba community, this is a perfect place to start.

  Here you get to experience two days of:

● traditional music and dance

The traditional dancers usually exhibit their passion and skills by dancing their waists and hearts out. You will get to feel the thundering beatings of the drums, echoed by voices that seem to appease the gods.

  ● Art and Fashion

Unique art and fashion pieces are visible on their traditional attire, the jewellery that adores their bodies, the pottery and not forgetting the carvings. You can’t miss a beautiful and valuable souvenir for friends and families back home.

  ● food delicacies

The staple food of the suba community is “kuon anang’ a”(traditional ugali prepared using ghee) with fish I.e Nile perch or Tilapia(omena & Mbuta). This is a delicacy.

A visit to the lakeside is not complete without devouring the fresh savoury fish.

  ● sports

There are different sports activities to participate in during this festival. We have a tag of wars, whereby different groups test their strength and resilience. 

The Luo and Suba community had a significant cultural sport of wrestling. It allowed the young, we’ll build and able fishermen to earn bragging rights in the community.

The match is not violent. It’s purely meant for entertainment purposes and a great chance for the young men to attract suitors.

  ● Boat races and Fishing

The people in the Island are super friendly. Occasionally you will find them fishing, drying their fish(dagaa, omena) and going about their business.

Fishing is the primary source of livelihood for the community. The festival also organises boat races among the local people. They get to compete on which team will win the race

Most hotels and lodges along the Island arrange for boat rides and fishing on request.

I found this interesting enough to try, I hope you will too 

  Literature

You will get to hear interesting stories, folklores and conversations that take you back in time into the wealth of the Abasuba culture.

The festival is run by different themes each year. In 2019 the theme was “The Island Remembers”. This made us remember, reminiscent and connect with the Island through culture, art and

celebrating heritage. The festival unites people from different worlds to appreciate and enjoy the heritage of the Suba people.

  Maralal International Camel Derby

Kenya’s Northern Frontier is a wild and untamed region.

The locals have retained their traditions.

Most of them are pastoralists, with Camels being an important element of their wealth. Maralal Camel Derby is one of the most celebrated events in Kenya. It takes place in the Yare Camel Club In Maralal Town, Samburu County.

The derby involves cycling, Camel racing and cultural performance from the Samburu people. Both the communities and visitors join in the festivities and races.

  ● Sports

The Camel Derby is graced by both amateurs and professional Camel racers. Most amateurs are usually first-time foreigners who have never taken part in the Camel races.

You will definitely have a fun laugh at the amateurs who can’t control the camels. Most times the camels move in whichever direction away from the race. A funny scenario it is. Watching the races struggling to steer the camels to the right path.

However, this gives room for the professional racers to get to the finish line first.

There are also bicycle races. For those who prefer this, they get an opportunity of challenging themselves. Some cyclists, who are greenhorn, don’t get to finish the race. It is a demanding task.

The two races usually start in Maralal town, and they take place co-currently.

  ● Music and Dance

The mood in Maralal town during the early is usually electric and fun. The music and dances from the Samburu people lighten the atmosphere.

  ● Art and Fashion

If you are a lover of art, fashion and handicrafts, there are curio stalls where these artefacts are displayed. You have a lot of choices to choose a souvenir from.

  Maralal Camel Derby is not just a competitive race but brings this desert town to life and showcases its cultural heritage.

  Kilifi New Year Festival

Kilifi New year festival is held annually from 30th December to 2nd January.

This festival is perfect for all those who are lovers of contemporary, African and electronic music. It is a melting pot of varied cultures and allows for freedom of expression.

The music festival is held under the shade of thousand-year-old baobab trees. It is set on a 20-acre field, home to wild orange and lemon orchids and bamboo forest in

Takaungu creak of the Indian Ocean.

The aim of this festival is supporting conscious living and sustainability while appreciating different cultures. Blending creativity with nature to show a connection with each other, the environment and the community.

Everyone is free-spirited expressing themselves through fashion, dance, art and music. The die to moment happens when a huge wooden sculpture is set ablaze symbolising new beginnings and shared hope for a promising future.

During the 2019 festival, a huge sculpture was burnt in honour of the last male Northern White Rhino – Sudan. A symbol that species extinction is a reality and it is up to the human race to value and protect its wildlife.

  ● Camping

Camping buddies, this is a great festival for you.

You are allowed to carry your own camping gear. The 20-acre piece of land has enough spaces for pitching tents.

There is also adequate space for parking vehicles, enough showers, toilets and shade to relax and unwind.

There is ample security for all those in attendance.

Moreover, boutique camping is also available during the four days of stay. You will just have to arrange for the bookings earlier enough.

  ● Beach Activities

There is a beautiful coastline a few meters away. You can go for an early morning jog, a swim, yoga or participate in beach ball games.

The refreshing breeze, combined with spectacular sunsets and free spirit around, makes this festival a bucket list.

Moreover, you can also plan to go for a boat ride on Watamu beach after the festival. Here you can do for snorkelling, explore the bottom world of the ocean.

You will discover colourful fish species, turtles and seagrass. With the help of trained tour guides, you can sail deeper to get a glimpse of the whales.

This is a fantastic way to end your new year celebration in Kilifi.

  Lamu cultural festival

Lamu cultural festival is held in Lamu Island, a world heritage site.

This old town has retained it’s Swahili culture over the years not giving in to pressures of the modern culture. The town is characterised by narrow streets, while its main transport means are donkeys.

The three-day festival is meant to give visitors a taste of the Swahili culture and lifestyle.

During the Lamu Cultural Festival, you get to experience dhow race, donkey races, competitive bao games, Swahili Henna paintings and traditional artefacts.

The bao games have existed for years in the East African region. Archaeological evidence shows that it has been played for thousands of years.

The dhow sailing races are executed by the locals. The racers are usually well prepared ready to showcase their skills in manoeuvring through the tides.

On the other hand, other people prepare to take part in a swimming competition. They will have to face the rough waters steering towards the other Island known as Shela and then swim back. With the scorching sun, Swimming race is ideal and a big relief.

The highlight of the festival is the donkey races. Residents, as well as the visitors, can participate. This sport is fun to watch. Steering a donkey needs natural talent, practice and skill. For

amateurs, some end up going towards the opposite direction from where the race is. Donkeys are the main means of transport owing to the city’s narrow and meandering streets. Donkeys have been used for ages by the residents.

For those who thrill in a shopping spree, there are lots of products to choose from. Toys, jewellery, clothes, toys and artefacts. You will find unique Swahili pieces to add on to your adventure collection.

  ● Street Food

What a better way of knowing a towns delicacies than sampling the street foods. Lamu has a vibrant, welcoming relaxed old town vibes. Like most Coastal towns, the street food culture is active.

You will find an array of street foods lined up on the streets early in the morning and in the evenings at around 4:00 pm.

There is a variety of finger-licking snacks and drinks to choose from. Most of them are Swahili dishes prepared from coconut milk, flour and with lots of sugar and spice. They include bhajia, vitumbua, jalebi, mitai, kaimati, mkate was Sinia, Mahari and mbaazi ya nazi. I know these are foreign names but when you get there you can surprise the locals a bit. 

If you are a foodie this would be paradise.

It is good for one to loosen up once in a while and enjoy the abundance of life

  Conclusion

Life is full of abundance. If you don’t travel and experience what other places have to offer then you are missing a lot.

“The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.” -Saint Augustine.

I hope these four incredible festivals in Kenya have inspired you to travel, explore alien culture, interact with different people and live a free life.

For each time we travel we see the world with a set of new eyes, become more conscious about our relationship with nature and fellow human beings.

  Travel tip written and shared by Delinah Mijide

Delinah is a champion for sustainable tourism and conservation practices. She has the passion to highlight businesses and brands that support community empowerment, environmental and

culture preservation. Let’s travel,be responsible and have fun.

Wants to know more about sustainable tourism visit The Eco-traveller.

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[softplacepod]

Episode 5: Saving What We Love

Show notes and transcript below the cut.

SHOW NOTES: EPISODE 5, “SAVING WHAT WE LOVE”

ACNH: https://www.animal-crossing.com/new-horizons/

“Rewrite the Stars,” The Greatest Showman: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yO28Z5_Eyls

Rey’s Vision: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Ib_gszTtig

“You Will Be Found,” Dear Evan Hansen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSfH2AuhXfw

TRANSCRIPT:

Hello, bees. It's me, Sara, sending you light and love, and also a bunch of things I've been super into lately that I think might be your jam. Welcome to A Soft Place to Land.

Item the first: welcome to Apple

Or, shared spaces

Look, okay, in this time, it seems like everyone is playing Animal Crossing: New Horizons and I am nothing if not a follower. At first I thought it would be more like Stardew Valley - the grind of the daily tasks, the deep relationships, ever-evolving, with your town’s citizens, the slow circle of seasons. And it’s not not like that, Animal Crossing. You can play it that way.

My spouse lives on my island, which is named Apple. My daughter named it. We have, now, a museum and a tailor’s, and my spouse and I have found a delicate balance of how we want to play. Where he is the finder of every bug and fish and fossil (and now art, because that’s a thing), the careful checklist of hot items and optimal paths through seasonal events, I am…less so. His house is full of items that bring him delight, a room full of bugs and fish he’s saving to get made into special art items. His front yard is a riotous blooming nest of flowers and lawn ornaments.

My house is smaller, and quieter. I keep only certain furniture and items, and sell the rest, or give them to him if I think he’ll like them. I have more floor space, and less decor. My front yard is nearly empty, aside from a birdhouse and a hammock. Instead, I’ve found a soothing rhythm of my daily tasks: clean up the beaches, pick up fallen tree branches, harvest fruit. I catch a few bugs and fish to sell, knowing they’ve all already been donated to our museum. I don’t bother with turnips or hot items. Instead, I’ve become the island’s infrastructure manager. I built a ramp, a couple of bridges. I arrange plots and buildings, reshape where the fruit trees and flower gardens are.

We share the island, but can never interact - we just have the one Switch Lite - and it’s become a sort of game of telephone. We leave each other items or notes, we might drop an extra recipe on the other’s floor, we make sure the other knows that this or that traveling seller is around today. We’re together but not, on the island. It’s nice.

Item the second: is it impossible?

Or, I Want songs

I think I’ve listened to the soundtrack for The Greatest Showman about thirty times now. While I skip some of the songs more often than not, they are all excellently done. “Never Enough” is a heartbreaker, the theme song is boss, “This Is Me” is the obvious stunner. But for whatever reason (there are a lot of them), I’ve found myself drawn again and again to the duet “Rewrite the Stars.” It’s a love duet, and a breakup song, and a celebration, and also it’s an I Want song with a subversion built into the final lines.

Oh, okay, so “I Want” songs, in musicals, are the song where the character sings about how they’re unsatisfied with their current life, and the song bursts from them to describe the life they want. It’s a really common trope in musicals in general, and it’s especially common in 1990s animated musicals and beyond, because in the 60s, a conductor named Lehman Engel ran a series of workshops and taught an entire generation of people how to write musicals, and he thought the “I Want” song was important, so. You could think of, say, “Just Around the Riverbend” from Pocahontas, “Part of Your World” from The Little Mermaid, or “Touch the Sky” from Brave. For musical theatre songs, “Matchmaker, Matchmaker” from Fiddler on the Roof, “The Wizard and I” from Wicked, or “Maybe This Time” from Cabaret. There are a lot of them, is the point.

I Want songs, by their nature, describe the state of discontent in which the singer lives, and also - and this is important - the steps they’re going to take to fix that. They’ll keep paddling, they’ll swim to the surface, they’ll run into the wilderness, they’ll seek a marriage with someone worthwhile, they’ll prove their worth, they’ll find a love that doesn’t hurt them. The I Want song is also, by its nature, an I Am Going To song.

And at first, “Rewrite the Stars” sounds like that. It’s two people singing about how they’re obviously falling in love, but external factors and fear are keeping them apart. As the song goes on - in the movie, they’re Zac Efron and Zendaya, separated by race, class, everything - the lovers imagine themselves in the world they describe, where they step bravely out and demand the future they want. But then. But then they are brought back to the ground, literally, by one character pointing out that it’s unrealistic, nearly impossible, and leaving.

It’s a broken I Want song. It’s I Want and This Is How I Could, But I Won’t. It is a hope spot, of sorts, that is then dashed to pieces.

Item the third: voices in the Force

Or, no one is alone, again

There is one moment - there were a couple amidst the parts I hated - in The Rise of Skywalker that keeps coming back to me. I should note, before we begin, that I am on record everywhere as absolutely loving The Last Jedi and seeing no reason for 80% of what was in Rise of Skywalker to have happened.

Long story slightly shorter, there is a moment in the Last Jedi (I’m getting to it, hang on) where all hope seems lost, where the heroes look up in despair and begin to accept their inevitable defeat. And then. And then a sky fills with allies come to help. The galaxy answers the call, and everyone with a ship and a blaster shows up. The fight renews. There are several moments like this in that movie, from Luke’s “no one’s ever really gone” to Rose’s astounding description of how they’ll win - “not fighting what we hate, saving what we love“ to Leia’s “we have everything we need” - moments that never fail to bring me to tears. It’s my favorite story element, always: you are not alone. Your fight is not just you against an insurmountable enemy. You have allies, and they are with you, even if you can’t see them right now.

In Rise of Skywalker, among all the many things about it that I didn’t like, there is a moment where Rey hears all the Jedi of times past speak to her, through her, and tell her: we’re with you. We’re here, too. Get up. You’re not alone. And the power of that moment - we hear Luke, of course, and Obi-Wan, both of his actors contributing. We hear Master Yoda and Mace Windu, in thrilling small moments. We hear characters, women especially, who’ve never been heard in a main film but whose lives in animated and EU content are rich and full and inspiring. We hear Qui-Gon Jinn, who sort of started this whole thing, and Anakin, who in death found a path towards being who he once was (and I have issues with that, don’t get me wrong, but it brought me to tears anyway).

The rest of the movie, in large part, is missed opportunities and boring filler. But that moment, regardless of anything else, stands with my favorites in the series. Moments of connection. Moments where someone who feels alone and abandoned finds a hand reaching out to them, a nudge in the Force that connects all life, a smiling face (or a grumpy one) with welcome on its lips.

Item the final: you will be found

Or, a musical I haven’t even seen

I haven’t seen Dear Evan Hansen, and I won’t, probably, unless it gets released on a streaming service or something. What I have seen, over and over, are people singing one or two of the songs from it. “You Will Be Found,” from what I can gather, features pretty heavily in the plot, and from my skimming of the wikipedia page, the plot is based on a set of lies, so that’s suboptimal, but - and this is important - that in no way lessens the power of this song.

Remember how “Rewrite the Stars” is so full of hope and promise only to dash it with the last lines? This song’s rooting in lies doesn’t matter, because it builds and builds into an overt, loud rejection of the idea that anyone is truly alone, that anyone is beyond help, that anyone is left behind. You reach out a hand and you find another. You seek a spark of hope and it’s there, cupped in someone’s palms, and they’ve been reaching out to you, too, and now you’ve found each other.

We’re feeling alone, many of us, right now. Isolated and quarantined, and things may be starting to open up but we’re far from safe, and it’s all just…it’s a lot right now. And while I can’t promise you safety or happiness, an easier way or a hopeful sunrise, I can promise you that you are not, in fact alone. You are apart, you are secluded, you are many things. But alone, you are not. The galaxy is your ally against the enemies at your door. The onus is not on you to call out for help; we are already here, pouring out what light we can into the darkness, seeking your hand with ours. It feels, so much, like grasping in the dark these days, and sometimes we’re too tired or scared, too worn down or afraid, to keep reaching. I understand. We all do it. We all have days when we can’t see or hear or sense anyone with us, anyone on our side, and we feel abandoned.

For many of us, though, those days aren’t all of them. We have days, too, where we can be the hand in the darkness searching for another. We can be the person singing into space, knowing the song will land in ears that need it. We can shine our lights out into the storm and believe that those who seek it will find it. We won’t have those days all the time, and we won’t always be the ones in search of comfort. The way this works is that we all give what we can and take when we need it. Your days of reaching out and mine don’t have to be the same ones. We push and pull together, we find a balance. We’re not alone. Get to your feet. Look around you. Find another person and pull together on the yoke, and we’ll continue to move forward in space and time.

[music]

Theme music for A Soft Place to Land is “Repose,” by Chase Miller, off his album Burnout. Chase’s music can be found at chasemiller.bandcamp.com. Show notes and episode transcripts are at softplacepod.tumblr.com. You can find me on Twitter @cyranoh_ and you can listen to me jabber on as the foil to my very good friend Anna on our parenting podcast, The Parent Rap, at parentrap.net.

I love you very much. Take care of yourselves. See you soon.

[helenpattersoon]

How to share creative work fairly in the digital age

Reposting beautiful illustrations, inspiring quotes, and funny doodles on social media has become ingrained in our online habits—it’s a new era of digital sharing, and we’re still kinda figuring things out. But there are certainly a few fundamental things to take into consideration before sharing the next illustration that makes you feel, “it me”.

In many cases, these viral gems are original creative works by an artist—an illustrator or graphic designer who has decided to bless us by posting their work online. Artists share their own work as a means of growing their business, to build their portfolio or online presence—of course they want to attract fans and customers who might purchase from their store, hire them for a project, or recommend them to others.

But what often happens is that the original creator’s Instagram handle gets cut off in the process of reposting, or their image is simply uploaded to Twitter without any credit, shared without any trace back to where it came from. There are consequences to this which can affect a designer’s livelihood. So it’s important for all of us to know how to share creative work properly online, whether we want to repost something to a personal channel, or a brand social account. I reached out to artist and author Adam J. Kurtz to learn more and put together this deep dive on how to do it right.

  View this post on Instagram

  this is actually sorta the opposite of that old one i posted last week oops

actually just made this today during a zine making workshop i did for @wix’s design playground. it was a fully analog exercise (except for one or two designers who cheated but ok i know it’s hard to not use all our tools!!!) but i just did this little single panel version to share because i like it so much. anyway i had a great time thanks for having me etc.

event photos by @yotiroboti!

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Jun 18, 2018 at 7:49pm PDT

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Meet Adam J. Kurtz, an artist and author whose work often goes viral—often without credit

Adam recently published a vlog about his experience of finding his work posted to a company’s social media channel, without his permission or credit. Adam’s first step was to contact the company directly first, asking for the post to be deleted. He received an apology, and was promised that it wouldn’t happen again, however it totally did happen again with the same company. So Adam decided the next step was to request a payment for a ‘retroactive social media license’ for the use of his work—he invoiced the company and was successfully paid. Adam’s vlog is a great explainer on how to share creative work properly online, whether for personal or work use:

When I first saw Adam’s video I was instantly struck by how well he addressed this new aspect of digital sharing. “I don’t think many of us can exist without sharing our work online”, Adam told me by email, when I asked him about being a very shareable creative in the digital age. “Whether it’s a creative studio portfolio showcase, or individual creatives sharing new work, process, daily warm-ups, or other bits and pieces. It’s how we build our brands, find new fans, and get more clients. This is how the business mostly works now. It can be scary enough to share your work with an audience when you’re worried they might not like it,” Adam explained.

Adam makes a living from his creative work—he’s designed products for the likes of Fish’s Eddy, Urban Outfitters, Tattly, and some of his other clients are Adobe, Instagram, The New York Times, Penguin Random House, Pepsi. Adam’s products, his writing and graphics tap into universal themes that resonate deeply (and are super fun)—it’s understandable that many people connect with what he does and that his work often goes viral.

  View this post on Instagram

  the bitch (ur undeniable responsibility for ur own actions) is back

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Dec 23, 2017 at 9:35am PST

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While an artist can choose to share their work online to build their own following and establish a presence online—Adam for example has built a following of nearly 200,000 followers on his Instagram account—we need to be more aware of the best way to share designs when it’s created by someone else—whether it’s on our personal account, or when sharing something for a business.

What are the best practices when sharing creative work online?

  View this post on Instagram

  inspired by the response to my lil “f u pay me” vlog, here are some guidelines on how to repost my work. in general i’m rly chill and grateful about this but i’m not trying to directly help you sell your granola or meditation classes… when a company wants to use my art for business purposes they can hire me or license something. and of course use your best judgement! . if you’re coming to my instagram or anyone else’s and thinking it’s just a stock image service, you’re mistaken. if you’re enjoying something or feeling encouraged, that’s totally awesome (and the point) and i’m so glad. this post is really more geared towards stopping companies from posting for their own profit, under the guise of “friendly reposts” that undervalue creative work made by real human people. . and if you wanna hear me talk about this for 13 minutes head to YOUTUBE.COM/ADAMJK

i kinda just went in on how our creative work has value and how it’s up to all of us to educate others, especially if we work for a company with a social media team.

the response has honestly got me inspired to talk more and put more videos up. . p.s. i’m not here to publicly shame anyone! that’s not usually the best way to get things done. but if you wanna repost these guidelines or privately share this post with an account you see doing this stuff often, that’d be cool. remember that kindness is often more powerful than anger, especially when trying to educate someone!

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Jun 18, 2018 at 4:44am PDT

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Of course if you find something funny or touching, you want to share it with your followers—and there are soooooo many social sharing buttons which make this super easy. But this also makes it easy to accidentally or otherwise cut off the original creator’s handle. When people repost artist’s work to a personal network, this is no doubt a very beneficial action for artists, but you still want to just check quickly that you’ve credited the work properly.

Adam’s tip: When sharing to your personal account, tag the creator in both the image and caption, don’t alter the image, or edit out the creator’s handle or watermark.

Here are some best practises based on Adam’s suggestions, that we encourage everyone (whether for personal or biz use) to consider when sharing creative work—that could be a cartoon, illustration, quote, photo or other image. It’s super helpful advice that can generally be applied to all creative work:

Check that the artist’s credit is not buried under a long comment and paragraph of hashtags. Be mindful of tagging the artist in the first couple of lines underneath the post.

Feature the artist: Is the work being shared because it’s going viral and you want to get in on that, or to showcase the artist? In Adam’s case, he is only ok with brands sharing his work if the point is to showcase the work itself.

Communicate: Brands should not share work without a credit or if the image has been altered. A partnership should not be implied, and the post shouldn’t advertise a sale or promotion if there isn’t one. If you want to set up a partnership with a designer based off an example of their work you like, reach out!

Some of this is common sense, but it’s always good to remind ourselves that there are living, breathing humans behind these designs whose livelihood depends on being properly credited for their work. Why do they post it online if they don’t want us to share it, you ask? Good question! The point is, artists are quite happy for you to share their work—the right way, and with a proper credit. And if you’re a brand using someone’s creative work to build your following online, there should be compensation involved for the artist.

  View this post on Instagram

  checklist for getting over common fears — read the book for the actual advice broken down!

. i’m donating 100% of my pride month royalties for @thingsarewhatyoumakeofthem to the @teganandsarafoundation to help them support economic justice, health, and representation for LGBTQ girls and women. . you might remember we raised $7,500 for this great organization with the book preorder campaign last year, but I’m hoping this is a continued opportunity to use my art for good in the same way that @teganandsara continue to use theirs, leading by example for so many of us. . i earn $1.05 per book sold (in bookstores, on amazon, at my 6/13 @strandbookstore event, etc) so we’ll see how much it ends up being! if you haven’t got a copy yet this might be a perfect excuse to help yourself and others. . more details at thingsarewhatyoumakeofthem.com/pride. #thingsare #pride

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Jun 5, 2018 at 12:47pm PDT

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I don’t want to scare you from sharing your favourite artist’s work, just be careful about how you share it. Creative people are tired of being told that the ‘exposure’ will be great—if it’s for personal use, a credit can go a long way to bringing new fans (and possible buyers) to a designer’s website. If you’re a brand, unless you’re showcasing the artist’s work only, there’s a responsibility to pay the artist for using their creative work—bills can’t be paid with exposure.

Tips for creators: what to do when you find your work shared without credit

Adam also pointed out to me that the risk for artists these days is not only if the work will be received well, but if it might take on a life of its own without any connection back to the artist, spiralling off into the digital sphere across the umpteen platforms we’re all constantly updating, streaming and scrolling through.

“Now you have to be kind of worried that they will [like it], and might help themselves to it for any number of reasons,” Adam explained. “My perspective is kind of the same for both—make your work and share it. If people don’t like it, they keep on scrolling. If one bad apple out there does repost or otherwise use your work unfairly, you can deal with it then.”

For designers who might be hesitant about sharing their work online, Adam feels that the positive results outweigh the possible risk. “If you don’t share, nobody can ever see anything,” he says. “That is worse than any other negative outcomes. We can’t worry about what we can’t control, so try to let go of those concerns until they become relevant. That’s just good life advice in general, really.”

  View this post on Instagram

  sometimes laughter is the best medicine… sometimes it’s mood stabilizers! this pin is for anyone working towards balance. about to be sold out for good, i’ve got 20 left.

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on May 19, 2018 at 9:17am PDT

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If you’re a designer and you find that someone has posted your work without permission or without a credit, here are some tips for creatives that Adam shared with me.

Ask accounts to update their caption: Adam says, “It sucks when it’s already been up for a while, so there’s not the same benefit of having your work seen and a possible influx of followers. But I have a keyboard “text replacement” shortcut on my phone now. With a few taps I can easily paste a little comment that basically says, “Hi thanks for sharing my work but please credit me in the caption so your followers can find my art and books.” It’s not written aggressively, and since I started doing it, most people have responded positively.

Send a private email or direct message first: “There are plenty of people tweeting at big brands and seeing no retweets, no comments, and no response from the brand. So my approach is typically to be direct and discreet first. I DM the brand, email a listed address, or something like that. It keeps people from being on the defensive. And while I can’t really spend the time to educate everybody, it can make a difference later.”

Adam also told us how a proper credit can go a long way for an artist, if their work is featured and shared with a big audience:

When ‘exposure’ is maybe okay but probably not legal:  Adam says, “I’ve had one or two popular Instagram accounts […] share my work properly, with clear credit, to audiences of several million. That’s the kind of reposting that we’d all like, where a huge audience gets exposed to our work, and maybe 100+ new followers find us as a result. Reposting content might be questionably legal in the first place, but in the case of those big meme accounts, you can get your ‘payment’ in the form of that proper crediting.”

At the end of the day, if you’re a creative person who’s producing artwork, you should get to decide how that art is used.

Remember, it’s your work—decide how you want your work to be shared: Adam says, “When it’s a company, you are in charge. You might not want a certain business using your art to promote their stuff. You can ask them to delete it, and if they really keep ignoring you, you actually can file a copyright claim through Instagram support. Your work has a value and if a brand hasn’t asked or paid for it first, then you can decide how to respond. It’s your work.”

So, what’s the best way to share my next favourite relatable #content?

In an ideal world everyone would stop and think, “Where did this come from?” before sharing the next pug cartoon or cute illustration which is going viral. When posting to your personal social media channels, make sure you credit the original artist properly with a visible tag, and if an artist has added their name at the bottom of an artwork, don’t cut it off if you’re using a tool which resizes an image (the work should really not be edited at all).

What to do if you’re not sure where an illustration came from? Try to trace it back from where you found it, or use Google reverse image search.

If you’re working for a brand and want to share original work to showcase an artist’s work, at least seek permission first with an explanation as to why you want to make the post, and make sure to add a link to their handle at the top of the description. If the post is being used to promote a business or build brand awareness, contact the artist first to discuss compensation—or commission something especially for you!

Finally, if you notice someone sharing original work without an artist credit, give them a polite heads up and encourage them to repost it with a correction. The artist will love you for it.

Want something created especially for you?

Work directly with a designer to make it happen.

Let’s do it!

The post How to share creative work fairly in the digital age appeared first on 99designs.

via https://99designs.co.uk/blog/

[pamelahetrick]

How to share creative work fairly in the digital age

Reposting beautiful illustrations, inspiring quotes, and funny doodles on social media has become ingrained in our online habits—it’s a new era of digital sharing, and we’re still kinda figuring things out. But there are certainly a few fundamental things to take into consideration before sharing the next illustration that makes you feel, “it me”.

In many cases, these viral gems are original creative works by an artist—an illustrator or graphic designer who has decided to bless us by posting their work online. Artists share their own work as a means of growing their business, to build their portfolio or online presence—of course they want to attract fans and customers who might purchase from their store, hire them for a project, or recommend them to others.

But what often happens is that the original creator’s Instagram handle gets cut off in the process of reposting, or their image is simply uploaded to Twitter without any credit, shared without any trace back to where it came from. There are consequences to this which can affect a designer’s livelihood. So it’s important for all of us to know how to share creative work properly online, whether we want to repost something to a personal channel, or a brand social account. I reached out to artist and author Adam J. Kurtz to learn more and put together this deep dive on how to do it right.

 View this post on Instagram

 this is actually sorta the opposite of that old one i posted last week oops

actually just made this today during a zine making workshop i did for @wix’s design playground. it was a fully analog exercise (except for one or two designers who cheated but ok i know it’s hard to not use all our tools!!!) but i just did this little single panel version to share because i like it so much. anyway i had a great time thanks for having me etc.

event photos by @yotiroboti!

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Jun 18, 2018 at 7:49pm PDT

Meet Adam J. Kurtz, an artist and author whose work often goes viral—often without credit

Adam recently published a vlog about his experience of finding his work posted to a company’s social media channel, without his permission or credit. Adam’s first step was to contact the company directly first, asking for the post to be deleted. He received an apology, and was promised that it wouldn’t happen again, however it totally did happen again with the same company. So Adam decided the next step was to request a payment for a ‘retroactive social media license’ for the use of his work—he invoiced the company and was successfully paid. Adam’s vlog is a great explainer on how to share creative work properly online, whether for personal or work use:

When I first saw Adam’s video I was instantly struck by how well he addressed this new aspect of digital sharing. “I don’t think many of us can exist without sharing our work online”, Adam told me by email, when I asked him about being a very shareable creative in the digital age. “Whether it’s a creative studio portfolio showcase, or individual creatives sharing new work, process, daily warm-ups, or other bits and pieces. It’s how we build our brands, find new fans, and get more clients. This is how the business mostly works now. It can be scary enough to share your work with an audience when you’re worried they might not like it,” Adam explained.

Adam makes a living from his creative work—he’s designed products for the likes of Fish’s Eddy, Urban Outfitters, Tattly, and some of his other clients are Adobe, Instagram, The New York Times, Penguin Random House, Pepsi. Adam’s products, his writing and graphics tap into universal themes that resonate deeply (and are super fun)—it’s understandable that many people connect with what he does and that his work often goes viral.

 View this post on Instagram

 the bitch (ur undeniable responsibility for ur own actions) is back

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Dec 23, 2017 at 9:35am PST

While an artist can choose to share their work online to build their own following and establish a presence online—Adam for example has built a following of nearly 200,000 followers on his Instagram account—we need to be more aware of the best way to share designs when it’s created by someone else—whether it’s on our personal account, or when sharing something for a business.

What are the best practices when sharing creative work online?

 View this post on Instagram

 inspired by the response to my lil “f u pay me” vlog, here are some guidelines on how to repost my work. in general i’m rly chill and grateful about this but i’m not trying to directly help you sell your granola or meditation classes… when a company wants to use my art for business purposes they can hire me or license something. and of course use your best judgement! . if you’re coming to my instagram or anyone else’s and thinking it’s just a stock image service, you’re mistaken. if you’re enjoying something or feeling encouraged, that’s totally awesome (and the point) and i’m so glad. this post is really more geared towards stopping companies from posting for their own profit, under the guise of “friendly reposts” that undervalue creative work made by real human people. . and if you wanna hear me talk about this for 13 minutes head to YOUTUBE.COM/ADAMJK

i kinda just went in on how our creative work has value and how it’s up to all of us to educate others, especially if we work for a company with a social media team.

the response has honestly got me inspired to talk more and put more videos up. . p.s. i’m not here to publicly shame anyone! that’s not usually the best way to get things done. but if you wanna repost these guidelines or privately share this post with an account you see doing this stuff often, that’d be cool. remember that kindness is often more powerful than anger, especially when trying to educate someone!

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Jun 18, 2018 at 4:44am PDT

Of course if you find something funny or touching, you want to share it with your followers—and there are soooooo many social sharing buttons which make this super easy. But this also makes it easy to accidentally or otherwise cut off the original creator’s handle. When people repost artist’s work to a personal network, this is no doubt a very beneficial action for artists, but you still want to just check quickly that you’ve credited the work properly.

Adam’s tip: When sharing to your personal account, tag the creator in both the image and caption, don’t alter the image, or edit out the creator’s handle or watermark.

Here are some best practises based on Adam’s suggestions, that we encourage everyone (whether for personal or biz use) to consider when sharing creative work—that could be a cartoon, illustration, quote, photo or other image. It’s super helpful advice that can generally be applied to all creative work:

Check that the artist’s credit is not buried under a long comment and paragraph of hashtags. Be mindful of tagging the artist in the first couple of lines underneath the post.

Feature the artist: Is the work being shared because it’s going viral and you want to get in on that, or to showcase the artist? In Adam’s case, he is only ok with brands sharing his work if the point is to showcase the work itself.

Communicate: Brands should not share work without a credit or if the image has been altered. A partnership should not be implied, and the post shouldn’t advertise a sale or promotion if there isn’t one. If you want to set up a partnership with a designer based off an example of their work you like, reach out!

Some of this is common sense, but it’s always good to remind ourselves that there are living, breathing humans behind these designs whose livelihood depends on being properly credited for their work. Why do they post it online if they don’t want us to share it, you ask? Good question! The point is, artists are quite happy for you to share their work—the right way, and with a proper credit. And if you’re a brand using someone’s creative work to build your following online, there should be compensation involved for the artist.

 View this post on Instagram

 checklist for getting over common fears — read the book for the actual advice broken down!

. i’m donating 100% of my pride month royalties for @thingsarewhatyoumakeofthem to the @teganandsarafoundation to help them support economic justice, health, and representation for LGBTQ girls and women. . you might remember we raised $7,500 for this great organization with the book preorder campaign last year, but I’m hoping this is a continued opportunity to use my art for good in the same way that @teganandsara continue to use theirs, leading by example for so many of us. . i earn $1.05 per book sold (in bookstores, on amazon, at my 6/13 @strandbookstore event, etc) so we’ll see how much it ends up being! if you haven’t got a copy yet this might be a perfect excuse to help yourself and others. . more details at thingsarewhatyoumakeofthem.com/pride. #thingsare #pride

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on Jun 5, 2018 at 12:47pm PDT

I don’t want to scare you from sharing your favourite artist’s work, just be careful about how you share it. Creative people are tired of being told that the ‘exposure’ will be great—if it’s for personal use, a credit can go a long way to bringing new fans (and possible buyers) to a designer’s website. If you’re a brand, unless you’re showcasing the artist’s work only, there’s a responsibility to pay the artist for using their creative work—bills can’t be paid with exposure.

Tips for creators: what to do when you find your work shared without credit

Adam also pointed out to me that the risk for artists these days is not only if the work will be received well, but if it might take on a life of its own without any connection back to the artist, spiralling off into the digital sphere across the umpteen platforms we’re all constantly updating, streaming and scrolling through.

“Now you have to be kind of worried that they will [like it], and might help themselves to it for any number of reasons,” Adam explained. “My perspective is kind of the same for both—make your work and share it. If people don’t like it, they keep on scrolling. If one bad apple out there does repost or otherwise use your work unfairly, you can deal with it then.”

For designers who might be hesitant about sharing their work online, Adam feels that the positive results outweigh the possible risk. “If you don’t share, nobody can ever see anything,” he says. “That is worse than any other negative outcomes. We can’t worry about what we can’t control, so try to let go of those concerns until they become relevant. That’s just good life advice in general, really.”

 View this post on Instagram

 sometimes laughter is the best medicine… sometimes it’s mood stabilizers! this pin is for anyone working towards balance. about to be sold out for good, i’ve got 20 left.

A post shared by Adam J. Kurtz (@adamjk) on May 19, 2018 at 9:17am PDT

If you’re a designer and you find that someone has posted your work without permission or without a credit, here are some tips for creatives that Adam shared with me.

Ask accounts to update their caption: Adam says, “It sucks when it’s already been up for a while, so there’s not the same benefit of having your work seen and a possible influx of followers. But I have a keyboard “text replacement” shortcut on my phone now. With a few taps I can easily paste a little comment that basically says, “Hi thanks for sharing my work but please credit me in the caption so your followers can find my art and books.” It’s not written aggressively, and since I started doing it, most people have responded positively.

Send a private email or direct message first: “There are plenty of people tweeting at big brands and seeing no retweets, no comments, and no response from the brand. So my approach is typically to be direct and discreet first. I DM the brand, email a listed address, or something like that. It keeps people from being on the defensive. And while I can’t really spend the time to educate everybody, it can make a difference later.”

Adam also told us how a proper credit can go a long way for an artist, if their work is featured and shared with a big audience:

When ‘exposure’ is maybe okay but probably not legal:  Adam says, “I’ve had one or two popular Instagram accounts […] share my work properly, with clear credit, to audiences of several million. That’s the kind of reposting that we’d all like, where a huge audience gets exposed to our work, and maybe 100+ new followers find us as a result. Reposting content might be questionably legal in the first place, but in the case of those big meme accounts, you can get your ‘payment’ in the form of that proper crediting.”

At the end of the day, if you’re a creative person who’s producing artwork, you should get to decide how that art is used.

Remember, it’s your work—decide how you want your work to be shared: Adam says, “When it’s a company, you are in charge. You might not want a certain business using your art to promote their stuff. You can ask them to delete it, and if they really keep ignoring you, you actually can file a copyright claim through Instagram support. Your work has a value and if a brand hasn’t asked or paid for it first, then you can decide how to respond. It’s your work.”

So, what’s the best way to share my next favourite relatable #content?

In an ideal world everyone would stop and think, “Where did this come from?” before sharing the next pug cartoon or cute illustration which is going viral. When posting to your personal social media channels, make sure you credit the original artist properly with a visible tag, and if an artist has added their name at the bottom of an artwork, don’t cut it off if you’re using a tool which resizes an image (the work should really not be edited at all).

What to do if you’re not sure where an illustration came from? Try to trace it back from where you found it, or use Google reverse image search.

If you’re working for a brand and want to share original work to showcase an artist’s work, at least seek permission first with an explanation as to why you want to make the post, and make sure to add a link to their handle at the top of the description. If the post is being used to promote a business or build brand awareness, contact the artist first to discuss compensation—or commission something especially for you!

Finally, if you notice someone sharing original work without an artist credit, give them a polite heads up and encourage them to repost it with a correction. The artist will love you for it.

Want something created especially for you?

Work directly with a designer to make it happen.

Let's do it!

The post How to share creative work fairly in the digital age appeared first on 99designs.

via 99designs https://99designs.co.uk/blog/marketing-advertising-en-gb/sharing-creative-work-fairly/