#its so good because cole had this deep-set need to pick and to know and to HELP. but what he is doing to vivienne isnt helping her. its

[abyssal-ilk]

having another normal one about cole's dialogue about/to vivienne. their dynamic is so interesting to me and i wish i had the words to properly describe it. cole is vivienne's worst fears wrapped into a single figure: a spirit and someone who is able to pick past her mask and see her deepest thoughts and worst memories. he is something that she has spent her entire life being afraid of, and she has no defense against him being able to just. dig into her head. and even though she tells him over and over again to stop, he doesn't. even when she tries to get the inquisitor to intervene, cole continues to press her. and as much as it irritates me that there is no option to firmly shut cole down when he does this, it is still SO interesting and good to read

[fearthereaperx]

WHERE: Stargaze Station WHEN: October 2000

Michael Monroe didn’t have the slightest comprehension of what he was doing, though judging by the stern set of his jaw and his steady, forward facing eyes, no one would have ever known. It was only apparent in the little tells– the way he occasionally reached up to scratch at the stubble lining his jaw, or how his hands tensed with a reflexive need for a cigarette. To anyone else, Michael would have appeared as calm and composed as he always was, but inside? He was reeling.

He didn’t know how to be a father. How could he when he’d never had an example to follow? Without that blueprint in mind, Michael had no idea how to confront his new reality– the one in which his sister had overdosed on heroin and god only knew what else, and he’d been called upon to pick up the pieces. He hardly knew where to begin, but as he glanced over at his fifteen year old now motherless nephew and noted the way the glow of moonlight betrayed the smallest glimpses of the grief that consumed the boy, Michael knew that he had to try.

He just didn’t know where to start.

Admittedly, Michael didn’t know much about Cole, and he knew that was largely by his own doing. When Diana had told him she was pregnant all those years ago and who the father was, Michael had done what any brother would have. He’d gotten her the fuck out of Tonopah Valley. And then he’d done the thing he doubted he’d ever fully forgive himself for– he’d stepped back. He’d stepped back and let Diana fend for herself hundreds of miles away when she hadn’t been in a position to do it.

Hindsight was always twenty-twenty– naturally– and as Michael looked back, he knew the decision he’d made hadn’t been the right one. He’d allowed selfishness to guide it– the Sons of Silence had been in its infancy and he, along with the other founding members, had desperately been chasing that dream into a reality. The short and long of it was that he’d pushed all of his focus at the club, rather than his own flesh and blood.

"See that?” Michael began, gesturing up at one of the constellations overlooking the valley. “That's Orion, and just below him, there’s Sirius, one of the brightest stars we can see from down here. Something, ain't it?" He’d always liked the stars, for more reasons than he could possibly name. They were a nice reminder of how vast the universe really was, and how small he was in comparison. In a lot of ways, it helped him scale his problems, one by one. Not make light of them, no, but place them in a way that made it all seem that much easier to manage.

"Guess so,” came the mumbled reply from the teen at his side.

One thing he’d noticed about Cole? He didn’t say much. And that was fine– Michael had grown quite accustomed to leading conversations over the years and had learned to take certain cues for exactly what they were. Glancing over at his nephew, he eased out a long sigh and reached into the inside pocket of his cut, hauling out a worn pack of Marlboro Reds and a lighter. Setting a smoke between his lips, he offered another to Cole, already hearing Laura scolding him inside his head, but for half a heartbeat? He didn’t think about the consequences– particularly how much Laura would have his ass for offering their nephew a smoke– but perhaps that was because it didn’t take a genius to realize that Cole had already smoked his fair share.

"Y'know why I like coming out here?" Michael continued, picking up where Cole’s silence had left off. “When I’m at my worst, I like to look up there,” he paused then, gesturing up at the deep indigo night sky and the bright stars that dappled it. “For every star I see, I try to think of something good. It’s almost like I sorta assign ‘em, in a way,” he explained, shrugging a shoulder. When he said it out loud, Michael figured it probably sounded silly, and maybe it was to a degree, but it helped steady him when little else seemed to work. “When I need reminding of everything that’s good in the middle of everything bad, and I need something to ground me? I just look up, and I can name ‘em one by one.” Perhaps it was just a more elaborate way of saying count your blessings, especially in a life that afforded so few of them. 

"But more than that, you see how vast all of that is? Reminds me of how small I am,” he started again, hoping that the message was coming across the way that Cole needed to hear it. "Not insignificant, no. But it’s got a way of putting things into perspective– makes you realize just how much of this world is out of your control.” If he wanted Cole to take anything away from his monologue, it was that, because he knew what his nephew was thinking, what he was feeling, without him uttering a single word. There was a name for that weight he saw in Cole’s eyes. It wasn’t just sadness, or grief. It was guilt– something Michael knew so well and could spot from miles away. In this situation, it wasn’t justified– Cole hadn’t done anything wrong, he hadn’t let his mother down in some way– but still, Michael could understand why the boy felt it anyway. It was the way he was wired. Like Michael, Cole felt everything so deeply– whatever emotion it was, he tapped into the deepest parts of it and felt it on a visceral level…and because of that, Cole would always be in pain, just as Michael was.

Peeling his eyes away from the night sky, he eyed Cole, a soft frown sinking between his brows, "What happened with your mom wasn’t your fault, Cole. You know that, right?"

Beside him, the boy unleashed a smoke stained sigh and shrugged, "Ain't so sure," he muttered, head shaking before he swallowed hard and dropped his gaze.

“I am,” Michael countered, glancing down at him with a raised brow, “If that means something to you.” He liked to think that it did if only because he hoped it might bring Cole some measure of comfort. Maybe it might relieve him of some of the weight he carried on his shoulders. "Your mother was a complicated woman," he continued, sighing heavily, "Complicated kinda runs in our blood, in case you hadn't figured that out already." He’d never known a Monroe to live simply, or breathe easily. It just wasn’t in their DNA, he was convinced of it. They were all complicated people, stubborn, and hard to love, and yet somehow, they carried on. Softening then, Michael found himself smiling in spite of the somber turn the conversation had taken, "But one thing that wasn't complicated was the love she had for you. It was the single most straightforward thing about her." 

Admittedly, Michael and Diana had grown apart over the years, and it was something he wasn’t proud of. It haunted him, really– if he was being completely honest about it. But on those rare occasions when they did talk and catch up, all Diana ever talked about was her son. It wasn’t about the big things though– no, Diana told him about the finer things, those that required a keen eye to pick up on. She told him all about Cole’s expressions and what certain ones meant, and about how she’d always known when something was bothering him when the way the warmth of his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. Diana saw all the things Cole probably thought she didn’t– because she loved him. 

"Your mom had a passion for life unlike anything I've ever seen,” Michael murmured, raising his cigarette to his lips and inhaling a long drag.

“So why’d she run from it?” Cole fired back without missing a beat. 

It was a fair shot, Michael figured. Diana’s death looked an awful lot like a suicide, but he had a hard time believing that his sister had set out to end her life. He wanted to believe it was a miscalculation, an honest mistake on her part. Or maybe that was just what Michael kept telling himself to hold his own guilt back. After being so absent from Diana’s life for so long, how would he even recognize the difference? “I don’t think she meant to, Cole,” he offered, though he wasn’t sure who he was trying to convince more– Cole, or himself.

“How ya figure?”

It was a loaded question, but not an unexpected one. The bitterness sneaking in between each word wasn’t unexpected either. Michael shook his head, knowing neither one of them would ever know for sure, but he liked to think Diana hadn’t done it on purpose. That reality was one he couldn’t bear to stomach. “Because she would’ve never left you intentionally, no matter how awful things got,” he offered, shrugging a shoulder. Michael had to believe that the love Diana had for her son outweighed her demons, but even as he sat there, trying to convince Cole of that, he knew just how troubled his sister had been– how deeply she hurt. 

“It’s easy to feel angry. In your shoes? Hell, I’d probably feel the same way. Feels easier than facing the hurt, sure,” Michael started up again, switching gears the slightest bit. He couldn’t take back what happened to Diana, nor could he explain it. But what he could do was try and get through to his nephew– a boy who knew more hurt than he should ever have to and who’d been forced to grow up long before he was ever supposed to. “But hurt ain’t a bad thing– not if you grow from it. And you’ve got a real shot at doin’ that now.”

Still, even as he said it, Michael knew that was easier said than done. Diana had been all Cole had ever known for his entire life and within an instant, she was gone and his world had flipped on its axis. He’d been sent to live across the country with an aunt and uncle he didn’t know. He could only imagine how overwhelming it was, how angering and frightening. Whatever Cole felt, Michael figured he had full rights to it. “I know your world’s been flipped upside down, son,” he murmured, reaching over to tuck an arm around the teen’s shoulders, “You’ve got every right to be twisted up, spun out– whatever the case may be.” But he didn’t want those feelings to bulldoze the warmer memories of his mother. Cole deserved a softer landing than that– he deserved to think about his mother and not hate every second of it, or hurt. It wouldn’t happen overnight, Michael knew that, but he hoped that one day, Cole could remember the good before the bad– the beginning before the end.  “I ain’t ever gonna tell you how to feel, but I will say this,” Michael started, tossing his dying cigarette down into the dirt. “I dunno if it’ll ever make sense, if it’ll ever not hurt…but I’m here every step of the way, alright? We don’t know each other all that well, but I’ve got you, Cole– I’ve got ya.” Shaking his head, he glanced down at his nephew, and when he did, the sight before him damn near broke his heart. That sad, lost look in Cole’s eyes had only grown, finally reaching that point where it was bound to spill over. He could see Cole holding it back, fighting to keep his tears at bay, but as one managed to slip and slide down his face, Michael only held the boy tighter and swallowed hard when Cole clung back to him, nestling himself against his side. “Your mother was more than the worst thing she ever did– some of us are.” Michael had to believe that– it was the only way he could reconcile with what he was and the awful things he did. "And before you let her go, I hope you look for her– for who she really was," he murmured, reaching up to wipe that stray tear away. "Think you'll see a lot of yourself whenever you do." Michael smiled then because even in the midst of his grief, he’d been able to spot the similarities between his sister and his nephew. In a lot of ways, Diana was still very much alive through him. "And that ain't a bad thing."

[lloydskywalkers]

Heyo! Hope your doing exceptionally well, wonderful and ur staying safe! I was reading ur little oneshots for the movie! Verse and instantly fell in love! Think u have anymore for Kai and Lloyd? (But u don’t need to listen to this, obviously hehe) Have a splendid day!

ahhH thank you, I hope you’re doing well too!! :D oh man it’s been so long since i’ve written something for movie-verse, but I’ve had this little snippet in my head for a while so I guess it’s as good a time as any (and it is, of course, about kai and lloyd bc when is it noT)

it’s a little different than what i usually write, for movie-verse? but i hope it fits the bill! (takes place pre-movie, btw)

Of all his friends, Lloyd thinks Kai is most like the sun. Not just for his codename, and the enthusiasm with which he brings fire to the team, metaphorically and far too often literally, but for how bright he is. Kai reminds Lloyd of the sun at full force, strong and blazing and staunchly refusing to let anyone hide from his warmth. An endlessly combusting ball of stubbornness and passion.

Kai also reminds Lloyd of the sun in the way that he possesses about the same amount of brain cells the sun does, which is zero, because the sun has no brain — much like Kai.

“Hey, ru—de, ow, stop—”

Kai’s petulant response strangles off in cracked pain as Lloyd hushes him, simultaneously pulling the alcohol-soaked cloth from his arm with a sympathetic wince.

“Sorry, sorry,” Lloyd murmurs, wringing the edge of the cloth. “But I’ve gotta — it’ll get infected, if you don’t—”

“Nah, s’okay,” Kai says, breath hissing out through clenched teeth. He gives Lloyd a wavering smile that could almost be encouraging, were he not bleeding over Lloyd’s faded bedspread. “Just caught me off guard, I’m good now. ‘Sides, the — the stitches are gonna be worse, so—”

“It won’t be that bad,” Lloyd promises him, cleaning the rest of the deep slashes that run across Kai’s arm as quickly as he can. The lower ones aren’t so bad — he could get away without stitches, maybe. It’s the uppermost one that scares Lloyd, cutting deep enough into Kai’s skin to pose a threat. And Lloyd has no intention of leaving Kai anywhere near in danger, especially with the reason he’s hurt in the first place.

Lloyd swallows against the thick lump that suddenly forms in his throat, trying to banish the flood of emotions that have been rising since the battle against his father’s forces earlier. Surprise, shock, gratitude—? A swirling maelstrom of a deep-seated kind of aching warmth Lloyd is utterly unfamiliar with. It leaves him off-kilter, and words don’t come easily as they usually do.

Not that words ever come easily to Lloyd, but normally he isn’t quite this stuttering. Maybe. He hopes not. Maybe he’s just hyperaware right now, after everything, and he always sounds this embarrassing.

“I promise,” Lloyd continues, yanking himself from his thoughts as he busies with the needle. “I’ve got a lot of experience, and I’ll be gentle.”

Kai watches Lloyd threading the needle with a thinly-veiled fear, but he nods, the bravado Lloyd’s more familiar with making its way across his face. “Nice,” he says. “I trust you, Dr. Lloyd.”

Lloyd’s hands falter with the needle for a moment, before he resumes sterilizing it, ducking his head. Kai sounds like he means it — Kai sounds like he means everything he says, but the way he says trust hits differently, for Lloyd.

They’ve only been a team for few months, now. Not very long at all, to form any kind of trust in the son of your greatest enemy. Lloyd’s been going to school with some of the same people since kindergarten, and they’ve never looked at him with anything kinder than hatred, much less trust. And yet Kai is here, offering him his bleeding arm in Lloyd’s tiny room, trusting him to repair the damage he only took because he was protecting Lloyd.

Lloyd doesn’t understand. He doesn’t — people don’t — but his team—

They listened to him. Actually listened to him, to Lloyd. They actually listen to him in general, have since they were all thrown together in this odd little grouping, but it hasn’t quite hit home in the way it did tonight, when he’d snapped orders at them in barely-restrained panic, Kai’s blood staining his fingers as he’d staunched the knife wounds meant for him.

They hadn’t flinched back at his raised voice. Lloyd never raises his voice — he’s learned to keep it quiet, soft, unassuming. Even the slightest slip of frustration is enough to send anyone around him murmuring in suspicion, eyes narrowing and hissed whispers of just like his father filling the air.

Lloyd’s voice had been sharp and strained, barking across the rooftop, and they’d listened. No one flinched back, no eyes widened in fear — they’d just listened. They’re still listening, carrying out Lloyd’s orders without question, and it’s — it’s dizzying, if Lloyd had to put a word to it.

Cole and Zane are taking care of clean-up — something Lloyd will have to thank them for later, profusely. Neither were particularly happy about letting Kai out of their sights, but Cole and Zane are better at keeping each other steady than anyone else. It was the right call, Lloyd knows it was. Hopes it was.

But Lloyd hasn’t been having much faith in his calls, tonight. Not after Kai went down.

He swallows, focusing on the sounds reverberating from behind his closed door. Nya and Jay are talking with his mother, Nya’s louder tones easier to hear as she laughs. Lloyd knows her well enough to catch the strain in it, but he knows it’ll fool his mother. They’re distraction — Lloyd’s house was closest, and he’s got the best supplies stashed there. No one questions why he’s the one with the fully stocked medical kit, but Lloyd suspects they’ve all drawn their own conclusions.

He wishes they’d believe him, when he says it’s because he’s worried for them. He grew up with Wu as his uncle, who picks fights on a daily basis — with Morro as his cousin, who picks fights on an hourly basis. Lloyd knows the importance of having the good kind of medical supplies.

He finishes prepping the needle, squeezing Kai’s wrist briefly in warning. Lloyd’s not usually a tactile person — not that anyone would let him be — but he knows Kai soaks up touch like a starved sponge, and Lloyd’s desperate to give any kind of comfort he can before he starts with the needle.

Kai swallows, fixing his eyes firmly on the faded glow-in-the-dark stars plastered across Lloyd’s ceiling.

“Okay,” he says, his voice tight. “Bring it on.”

Lloyd swallows, steels himself, and sets the needle against his skin. Kai flinches at the first prick, eyes squeezing shut briefly, but otherwise he doesn’t move, jaw set stubbornly as Lloyd moves quickly. For his part, Lloyd keeps his eyes locked on the stitches, his hands steady. For all that Lloyd’s made up of bouncing nerves half the time, his hands rarely shake. Never when patching wounds up. He’s always been proud of how steady he can hold a needle, and tonight is no exception.

It’s the least he can do.

Kai suddenly tenses up, a broken-off noise strangling in his throat. Lloyd’s heart twists, but he stays steady, rallying himself. Conversation — Kai likes talking, right? Distraction, he can do that.

“So, um,” Lloyd stutters. On second thought, he’s awful at small talk. But — for Kai. “The way you took down that last guy was, it was really cool. Where’d you learn that?”

Kai bites his lip, exhaling shakily before he answers. “I train too, you know.”

Lloyd’s mouth quirks, despite himself. “Not like that.”

“What, a ninja can’t — can’t get creative,” Kai replies, through half-gritted teeth. Lloyd doesn’t say anything, but Kai rolls his eyes, continuing. “Fine. When I was younger, I ah…might’ve taken a few dance classes. For Nya! ‘Cause I couldn’t let her go alone, y’know, but they were — they were kinda fun, I guess, and maybe they slip into fighting, sometimes.” His cheeks darken, and Lloyd bites back a quiet laugh.

“Nothing like Cole, obviously, ‘cause he’s an actual dancer, but — that’s where I got it from.” He pins Lloyd with a glare, that’s somewhat dimmed by the scrunched expression of pain on his face. “Tell anyone and you’re dead though, okay?”

Lloyd hums his agreement, too focused on the stitches to reply immediately. After a moment, though, he speaks up again. “I did some ballet, when I was little.”

“No way,” Kai says, sounding delighted.

“Yeah, way,” Lloyd says. “I’ve heard from a very reliable source that dancing backgrounds are useful, with ninja stuff.”

“Very reliable meaning your uncle,” Kai grins.

Lloyd shrugs. “Maybe,” he half-smiles. Kai suddenly sucks in another pained breath, but to Lloyd’s relief, it’s likely the last one. He finishes off the stitches with a well-practiced hand, snapping the end of the thread and exhaling in relief.

“There. All done.”

Kai’s eyes widen. “Seriously, already?” He glances down at his arm, his other hand moving up to touch the stitches. Lloyd smacks it away, glaring at him.

“Don’t touch. You still have to watch out for infection. I’ll text you instructions for taking care of it, and everything. Just don’t do anything, ah…”

“No ninja-ing?” Kai finishes for him, crestfallen.

“Probably a good idea,” Lloyd says, apologetic. “But it’s not too bad. Shouldn’t take long, and you can be out, uh, ninja-ing again."

Kai is quiet for a moment, regarding his stitches. Then he turns to Lloyd, who is immediately staggered at the bright smile that stretches across his face.

“Cool. Thanks, Lloyd. You’re good at this.”

Lloyd can’t answer, his throat burning. He forces the welling moisture back, looking away. Kai’s only hurt for him, and that is layered with so much more meaning than Lloyd can comprehend right now.

“No problem,” Lloyd mutters, focusing instead on the voices outside his door in an attempt to find footing again. He can hear his mom laughing at something Nya’s said, open and relaxed in a way his mom rarely is. Lloyd’s heart twists into knots.

He doesn’t deserve them, any of them. Not really.

If Kai reminds Lloyd of the sun, then the rest of the team reminds him of stars. All bright and shining, bursting with warmth in their own way. Maybe not quite at the blazing heat that Kai does, but Nya is a north star if Lloyd’s ever needed one. Jay’s a blinking constellation, scattered stars that form a complex whole much larger than you’d thought. Cole’s the kind of star you see first pop up over the horizon, blending with the oranges and purples of the sunset, like a painting you’d see in soft watercolors. Zane’s the early-morning kind of star, the ones that stay stubbornly after the night’s left, dotting the pale morning with a calm steadiness.

Lloyd would be a planet, he supposes, caught in faithful orbit around the five people who have somehow, for some reason, given him a chance. It’d be generous, though. No, Lloyd is content just to be a moon — with no light of his own, reflecting only the brilliance others give him the best he can.

Kai’s finger taps the edge of his forehead, snapping Lloyd from his thoughts, and he blinks in confusion.

“Lost you there, again,” Kai asks, words mangled through a yawn. “Where’d you go?”

Lloyd shakes his head, turning his attention back to the bloodied thread leftover in his hands. His stomach turns, and he quickly sets it aside. “Just thinking.” He pauses, momentarily lost for words. He settles for jerking his head toward the window, where the smoke trailing from their hard-won battle is still visible against the dark sky, and gives Kai a wry smile. “How much do you wanna bet the cheerleading team comes up with a new song tomorrow?”

It’s been an inside joke for them, the ridiculous songs Chen and his gang keep coming up with to throw at Lloyd, and normally it gets a laugh from Kai. This time, though, Kai is silent, his eyes searching as he stares at Lloyd. Lloyd shifts under the attention, caught off-guard again. He doesn’t know what kind of look this is, that Kai’s giving him.

“They shouldn’t talk about you like that,” Kai finally says. His voice is quiet, but Lloyd can spot the brewing anger in it. Kai’s always got anger to spare.

“Sticks and stones, remember?” Lloyd shakes his head. He’s learned, after a while, that anger changes nothing. “Words will never hurt me.”

“Words hurt when people are throwing sticks and stones at you while they yell about your dad,” Kai grumbles.

“No one’s thrown rocks since second grade, actually.”

“Hm.” Kai’s tone is a mix of thinly withheld anger and mild amusement. Lloyd tilts his head, confused, and Kai gives a huff, anger tugging loose.

“Y’know, people say that if kids throw rocks at you in second grade, it means they’ve got a crush on you.”

Lloyd knows well enough it’s a joke, but he flushes red anyways, heat spreading across his cheeks. “Yeah, sure,” he stammers. Kai laughs at his reaction, though, the odd kind of anger departing, and Lloyd feels he’s found his footing again.

They’re quiet as Lloyd finishes cleaning up the medical supplies, Kai nodding sleepily on his bed while Lloyd carefully washes the needle in the bathroom sink. Maybe he can convince his mom to let Kai spend the night, he thinks. Jay and Nya , too — their apartment isn’t very big, but it’s awfully late to make them walk home, and Lloyd is fine with taking the floor, if he needs to.

Lloyd nods to himself, resolving to ask her once he’s finished hiding the evidence. His mom’s been so thrilled about him having people over at all, he can’t see her saying no. A smile pulls at his lips as he listens to the conversation outside his door again. Jay’s rambling on now, bright and excited without any of his usual reservation. He feels a pang, wondering if Jay’s the same as him — wondering if they’re all the same, playing at muted caricatures of themselves, too fearful to let whatever lies beneath shine through.

He wonders what it means, that they’re the ones with the city in their hands, that weight on their shoulders. Wonders what it means, that Lloyd feels safer with bullets strafing the air around him and his mask on, than he ever has with it off. That Green Ninja will always, always sound better than Lloyd in his ears.

“Hey, uh.”

Lloyd starts at Kai’s voice, twisting the sink off as he turns to face him. Kai looks half asleep, but the smile he gives him is bright as ever.

“Thanks, seriously. Not just for this, but for looking out for us. You’re a good friend.”

Lloyd’s heart skips a beat, his brain latching onto the word friend and holding on tightly, tucking it somewhere safe inside his chest.

“So thanks, Lloyd,” Kai yawns, barely awake at all now, but still stubbornly clinging to the threads of awareness.

Lloyd’s got his own thank you to give back, twisted and strangled behind whatever lump’s formed in his throat, but Kai’s snoring before he gets the chance to say it. So Lloyd tugs the edge of his comforter over his friend — his friend — instead, and runs the words over in his mind again and again, like a treasured line from a book.

On second thought. Maybe Lloyd isn’t so bad. He’s only ever liked his name the way his mom says it, without any of the snapping, harsh emphasis others give it. In others’ mouths, Lloyd’s name is a curse. In his mom’s, Lloyd’s name belongs to a person.

But he thinks, maybe, he likes the way it sounds when his teammates use it, too.

[spinchip]

i mean. the prompt I've got in my head is like. a lil bit zangsty but, zane being rebuilt post s4 make me wonder if he can like. actually remember stuff about what happened early on. maybe the og four are reminiscing about some of their early days, and zane can't relate because zane can't remember? like. all those memories were p much lost for good after s3... makes me think

A/n: 1150 words. this was fun!

“Hey.” Kai says, knocking on Zanes door. It’d been open, the invitation extended to anyone who wished to see him, but Kai still lingers in the doorway.

Zane blinks up from where he's been sitting on top of his bed, bookmarking the page he’s been on and setting the book he’d been flipping through aside, “Hello, Kai.” He smiles, though faintly, as he registers the expression on his face, “Is something wrong?” he sits up a little straighter, swinging his legs over the side of his bed.

Kai hesitates, shaking his head, “No- well, it’s just… I’m really glad you’re back.” He admits, stepping into the rooms.

“Oh.” Zane says faintly, instantly forcing down the Overlord's memory before it can snap to the front of his mind, “I’m glad to be back as well.”

Kai sits heavily on the edge of the bed, close enough for their legs to touch, “I… had a lot of time to think about things, after…” He doesn’t finish that sentence, licking his lips.

“What were you thinking about?” Zane carefully avoids any mention of his death.

“About when the Monastery burned down.” He admits, “The things I said… I just kept thinking about how I never said sorry. I know you said I didn’t need to, but I think you deserve it. From me.” He takes a deep breath, straightens up and squares his shoulders, and speaks with the most conviction he can muster, “I’m really sorry about what I said, Zane… and I’m sorry about the way I treated you. You’re one of my best friends.” He says earnestly.

Zane nods, taking the weight of Kais words. He smiles gently, reaching out to squeeze Kais shoulder reassuringly, “I forgive you, my friend.”

With the apology passed on, Kai seems lighter, smiling brilliantly at his teammate before throwing his arm around him in a tight side-hug. “You’re the best, Zane!”

“I know.” Zane smiles, returning the embrace.

Kai sighs easy, and as the silence stretches he seems to grow a bit more awkward, “Well, I didn't mean to interrupt! I’ll leave you to your book.” he nods to the leather bound book Zane had been studying, standing up with a clap of his hands, “I’ll see you around lunch, yeah?”

“I’m making grilled cheese sandwiches.” Zane confirms, Kai fist pumps as he heads out the door.

Zane hums, sitting back on his bed once again. He picks up his fathers journal and scans the pages slowly, letting his fathers looping handwriting and intricately scribbled doodles fill in the gaps in his mind, memories contextualizing in his head, and tries not to let it bother him.

It was easy for Zane to forgive Kai for whatever rash words he’d thrown against him.

He... didn’t ever remember that happening, anyway.

_______________

He remembers most things, it’s not all been lost when he died. He remembers meeting Master Wu for the first time, he remembers dressing in all black and ambushing Kai that night, he remembers giving Pixal his heart. There’s a lot of little memories in between, smaller things, the day-to-day that still makes its home in his head. He barely remembers his father, those memories damaged long before the overlord, unable to survive past that trauma.

He finds, quite unexpectedly, that he has no memory of the first time he met Jay Walker.

He has the memory of before, Walking up those endless stair with Master Wu (who had been trying to hide how he was looking at Zane, impressed at how he didn’t even seem winded on their way up) and after, When Jay had led him over to the living room to introduce him to Cole. the time between was blank, a record-skip in his mind, the scene transitioning sharply past the moment he first laid eyes on his future friend.

Once he discovers it’s missing, he thinks about it a lot. He wonders what Jay had said to him, what he had said to Jay? Would the boy have commented on his lack of belongings? Would Zane have explained why?

Zane consults another memory. Jay didn’t know he was an orphan. Then what would he have said, when they first met? Jay was anything but unmemorable, how could Zane forget?

He thinks about asking sometimes, or prodding and picking delicately until Jay volunteers the information himself, or even waiting for it to come up in conversation naturally. It never does, really, not in a way that would satisfy the burning itch.

He doesn’t tell him because it would hurt his feelings to know Zane had forgotten him, probably.

He doesn’t really know Jay all that well. Or maybe he did. Was supposed to?

(how many memories is he missing?)

_______________

He’d accepted on Chen's island he wasn’t the white ninja, he’s conquered that fear. He was the titanium ninja, and that was fine, really. He was still Zane, probably, just a different version. He doesn’t want to drag on this existential crisis any longer, so he shuts the door on it and washes his hands of it. He is who he is, Pixal helped him figure that out.

And Cole, too, but Zane would never tell him that.

It’s just that, when he’d been all alone down there in that dungeon, and Pixal had coaxed the shattered and splintered pieces of himself back together, his memory had been… it had been damaged beyond repair long before then, really, he could accept this now. Things had been lost for good. He knew lots of stuff abstractly, that he was a ninja, that he lived in Birchwood Forest at some point, that he had lots of friends and lots of enemies- but there was a disconnect he couldn’t describe, a distance he never told Pixal about.

A chasm made all the more apparent when Cole peeked through those bars and Zane... didn’t recognize him.

But the thing that settles the spiraling, unsettling identity crisis in his chest is that Cole recognizes him.

“You’re alive!” Cole says so confidently that Zane instantly believes it’s true, that there’s no way he couldn’t be the man Cole recognizes, “And you’re silver?”

He can match the face and the voice, he can understand that it’s Cole and commit that to memory, but he didn’t understand who he was looking at the moment he saw him based on the hole riddled, damaged program he’d been working off of now.

“Titanium.” He corrects, and there’s a dissonance with the face in his files and the one before him, “Cole, you look white.” He comments, and Cole just smiles and laughs and says a lot of things about getting Zane home.

The distance in his head closes when Cole calls him lug nut, and the memories are suddenly his again, within his grasp, Cole the one piece of the puzzle he needed to kick-start his code back into working order. His life snapping back into reality instead of a nebulous, intangible thing shaped around him.

This is his secret, not even Pixal had realized what happened, and she’d been in his head. He doesn’t want anyone to know.

It’s fine now, anyway. He can always make more memories.

_______________

“Hey, Zane, do you remember when-”

Probably not.

[fanfalc-616]

The Rights Of A Nindroid

Chapter Twenty-Two

(Previous Chapter Here)

Apparently this chapter is too long for a singular tumblr post so I’ll post this and then reblog it with the rest-

Also watch me beat canon to death with a stick lol

Kai slams open the door to the bridge. “I have a new idea!” He proclaims. “I’m going to become the Emperor.”

He receives a bunch of blank stares at his statement.

Finally, after a long pause, Nya speaks up. “You’re going to what?” She demands in disbelief.

He can feel the wide smile forming on his face. “There’s an election coming up, and I-“

“Since when is that an electable position?” Jay blinks, his confused expression so intense it’s almost comical.

Nya opens her mouth to answer, but Kai keeps talking.

“Not sure, but it is. I did my research! Anyway, I’m going to become the Emperor and then order them to free Zane.” He explains. Honestly, he can’t believe they didn’t think of this sooner! The election is only seven months away, and it’s a great backup plan for if nothing else works.

Nya stares at him in shock. “I can’t even begin to explain how horrible of an idea this is.”

“I mean… it might work.” Jay defends. “There’s no harm in trying, right?”

“No. No, we are not doing this. Cole, Lloyd, back me up here.” Nya looks over at the two.

Cole looks up from his phone. “I’m already filing out the forms.”

“Wh- no!” She stands up abruptly. “No, this is a horrible idea! Do you realize how many things could go wrong here? We could-“

“You’re right.” Jay conceeeds. “With his recent arrests, Kai isn’t the best choice for this.” He winces as he looks over at the brunet, and Kai grimaces as he accepts the point.

“It should be Lloyd.”

The green ninja snaps to attention. “What?” He demands. “I- you- you guys don’t want me to be in charge, I- I wouldn’t be a very good leader!”

Cole shrugs. “I mean, you kind of already are.” He points out.

Kai comes over and sits on the table in front of the blond. “Look, either you do it or I do. What do you say?”

Cringing, Lloyd seems to be weighing his options, ignoring the shocked and upset look Nya has.

“... alright. What paperwork do I need to fill out?”

{ { { { { { { { { { ~ } } } } } } } } } }

Zane grimaces as both he and Cryptor are taken to the training room. When both of them are brought, it means only bad things.

After being chained down, Zane recognizes Kyle standing there. With a glare, he decides to cut to the point.

“I’m not going to say it again.” He snarls. “I am equal to any human.”

Kyle sighs, rolling his eyes. "Get off your high horse, Original. That's not why you're here."

From beside him, Cryptor seems to be thinking about speaking, but instead glances over at Zane.

Very well. He can do the speaking for the both of them- and as of now, that will be expressing his confusion.

“It’s… not?”

"No. You're here because…" He starts to circle them, surrounding them like a predator analyzing its prey for weaknesses, his cold tone matching the action. "...Because you two have been keeping secrets. From me, from the facility. Isn't that right?"

They- they have not discovered his Falcon, right? That- no. This must be bluff of some sort! And Zane will just have to call him on it.

Silently wishing he had a faceplate to allow him to better express himself, he sighs. “You monitor us day and night. What could you possibly think we’re doing?”

The sly smile Kyle gives him is unnerving. "I don't know, you're gonna tell me. Aren't you, General?"

Cryptor suddenly tenses, and Zane looks over at him as his breathing picks up. The other nindroid is clearly scared, borderline panicking.

“I…” Cryptor trails off, but Zane realizes that he should speak before Kyle manages to convince Cryptor to tell him what he wants to know.

Forcing confidence into his voice, he stares the blond down. “No one is telling you anything- because there isn’t anything to tell!”

Kyle seems almost amused. "Oh, really now?” He walks back over to Cryptor and taps on his eye scope, the action clearly a threat of some sort.

Zane internally winces at the way Cryptor horribly fails at hiding his fear and the way he flinches back. “We… it- it wasn’t… yes. Yes, Ma-“ He cringes, cutting himself off. “... we’re hiding something.” He miserably admits.

Wearing a sarcastic smile, Kyle looks back over to Zane. "Wow, didn't see that coming." He mocks.

Annoyance creeps into him as he glares at the other nindroid. “Cryptor!” He quietly hisses out the name, staring in disbelief.

The blond shakes his head. "Not its name. It won't answer to that, anymore.”

Zane glowers at that, but Cryptor doesn’t deny it, which only serves to fuel his annoyance.

Kyle continues. “But what it will answer to is this-“ He pauses a beat before dropping his voice into a dark threatening tone.

“What are you hiding?" He snarls.

After hesitating a beat, Cryptor answers the blond. “... do I have to?” He tries weakly.

Kyle arches an eyebrow. "Depends, do you remember who's physical and mental integrity depends on you cooperating?"

Taking a deep breath, Cryptor seems to struggle for words. Finally, in a choked voice, he gets out, “You didn’t hurt him. You- you lied. He’s fine.”

A weak laugh escapes him as he ducks his head, and Zane frowns- or he would, if he had his face- as he watches him. Still, Cryptor continues.

“And… I- I know that because we were hiding a way to-“

Sucking in a deep breath, Zane realizes that- that Cryptor is actually going to tell him. He’s actually going to explain the Falcon?!

“No!” Zane interrupts him before he gets the chance to continue. “Cryptor, stop it!” He demands.

Still seeming amused, Kyle continues prompting the other into speaking. "A way to communicate, I presume. What might it be…?" He takes on an exaggerated thinking pose.

While his voice is shaking, Cryptor does try to answer him. “Zane has a-“

Panic taking over, Zane shouts out, “Do not!”

Who knows what they’ll do to his Falcon if they capture him! Likely cause horrible harm, if not taking him apart!

The excitement Kyle shows is terrifying. "Do it!"

“He-has-a-Falcon-its-mechanical-we-can-connect-to-it-digitally-and-“ Cryptor speaks rapidly, getting the words out fast enough that Zane doesn’t have a chance to stop him.

Fear sets into him once again. “No, you can’t just…” he trails off. He can’t argue, not now that Cryptor has already told him.

"That's enough, General.” The blond gives a gentle smile. “Hush."

Zane glares at the other nindroid as he nods and lowers his head. He knows that Kyle had made some form of threat before, but this level of obedience? It’s absurd!

The blond paces around as he speaks to Cryptor, ignoring Zane for the moment. "Since you were pretty obedient today, you're not gonna get punished for this." He stops, staring menacingly at them. "But to follow what you told me about him being fine- He's not hurt yet. And now that you won't be able to talk to him, you won't even know if he is."

Cryptor opens his mouth as if to speak, but seems to think better of it and looks away, pointedly avoiding Zane’s death glares.

He doesn’t have the words to describe the emotions building inside of him. Cryptor had- he had told Kyle! And so easily! He had barely tried defying him at all!

The blond redirects his attention to Zane."And you…" He pauses a moment as he glare. "Congrats."

Zane grinds his teeth, desperately trying to think of a way to divert Kyle’s attention and possibly save his Falcon. He can’t… while a simple design compared to him, that bird is all he has left of his father. He can’t let any harm come to him!

“Disconnect me, then.” He snaps. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll find another way, another plan. I am not your slave, not a mindless drone! I’m not this ‘Original’ that you try to make me. I am Zane Julien, the white ninja. And that, you will never take from me.”

Kyle arches an eyebrow. "...Nice speech.” He pauses a beat. “I'm disassembling the Falcon."

Every circuit and wire he has is suddenly tensing up as he processes that. “What for?” He demands. “If I can’t connect to him, he poses no threat to you!”

"But you care for it, don't you?" Kyle smiles, an unnerving smile that carries a threat to it.

Zane can feel his power source heating up as he tries desperately to come up with a way to convince Kyle to leave him alone. “I- he’s a bird. That’s- that’s all.”

He takes a moment to breath and think before continuing. “Leave him out of this.” He snaps. “A- a bird is of no threat to you. Unless, of course, you and your organization is so weak that something so simple could stand in your way.”

Perhaps trying to bait someone as irritable as Kyle into becoming upset isn’t a good idea, but he’s hoping that maybe, just maybe, he can trick the blond into leaving the Falcon alone.

The blond snorts. "Uh-huh, yeah, I see that. But I raise you this. If it's truly 'just a bird', then you shouldn't be trying so hard to make me leave it alone. Why should you care if it's just a useless communication device?" There’s a taunt to his voice, but before Zane can think of a comeback, Cryptor is speaking.

The other nindroid’s voice is quiet and regretful. “His father made it, it’s all he has left of him.” He explains.

Zane can only stare. Why is Cryptor doing this?! He- Kyle did not even directly ask him about that! He had no reason to share that information! Now- now Kyle may-

A satisfied smile is on the blond’s face. "Now that changes everything. Congrats again, Original. You and General just won front row seats to the disassembling of your Falcon."

Beside him, Cryptor tenses up. “Me too?” He seems surprised and afraid, but at the moment, Zane is too upset with him to care about his fear.

"Yep.” Kyle smirks. “Have fun."

Feeling himself trembling, Zane speaks up, desperately trying to find a way to stop Kyle… but coming up empty.

“W- wait!” He chokes out. “You can’t- no, no, you…” He’s trembling, knowing that he would be near tears if he were human, fear taking ahold of every gear and circuit he has as his voice starts to break with his words. “... please, don’t…” He trails off.

“Don’t hurt him.”

His voice is nothing more than a broken whisper.

The blond has the nerve to laugh. "Why not?” He questions amusedly. “You clearly haven't learned your place, and this kind of punishment seemed to work on General. I don't see a single good reason why I shouldn't."

There’s a pause as Zane collects his thoughts.

His voice is quiet as he begins to speak. “Why not.” A weak, broken laugh escapes him. “Why not, you ask me.”

He looks up from the floor in order to look Kyle in the eyes as he speaks, voice beginning to rise in volume. “I have a better question.” He spits out.

“What the hell do you want from me?!” He shouts out the words, screaming them. “You take us here, you torture us, you try to convince us that we’re lesser, and for what?! Revenge?” He laughs a little, feeling his patience, his sanity, on the edge of breaking entirely. “This solves nothing! You fight fire with fire, you choose to cause suffering as though- as though that will bring back the ones you lost! I never meant to harm anyone! I was built to protect! And-“

Kyle’s voice is dangerous in a way that Zane has rarely heard, even in the voices of his most threatening opponents. "Shut the FUCK UP." The blond demands.

Zane glares with as much malice as he can muster. “No.” He snarls. “I wasn’t finished. You-“

"Close your fucking mouth.” Kyle snaps. “Was I not clear? You're asking me what I want from you, why I do all this? I'll tell you."

Zane scoffs. “Please, do!”

"I hate you.” The blond says simply. “And I want you to suffer. Yeah, it doesn't bring my lost ones back. But when I remember the terror on his face as he died in my goddamn arms, I feel really good about all this." His smile is threatening, a menacing expression that makes fear pool in his gut.

He stares for a moment, trying to figure out how to respond. What does he even say to that?

“I’m sorry for your loss.”

He waits only a moment before continuing.

“But if put in the same position…” Zane stares Kyle dead in the eyes as he speaks. “I would do it again. More lives were saved then lost, and I would have to be a fool to be willing to let so many suffer for your sake. Because it was never about him, was it?” He scoffs. “It’s about you. He’s not here anymore. What happens now has no effect on him. You use his death as an excuse to cause misery. You-“

“Zane?” Cryptor mutters, catching his attention. “Shut the hell up.”

"...You killed him.” Kyle’s voice is quiet, but no less threatening. “You killed so many people. Maybe even as many as you saved. And you never faced any trial."

Zane shakes his head. “The Golden Master would have killed everyone.” He argues. “I did what I had to do.”

He can feel Cryptor’s internal screaming at him, but he ignores the other in favor of staring down Kyle.

"What you had to do was to protect.” The blond snaps. “And you couldn't even do that right."

He- what?

Zane finds himself struggling for words, attempting to find a way to defend himself. He- he knows that he had failed, in a way, by...

“I protected as many as I could!” He shoots back, trying to keep his voice steady. “I was willing to die to protect those in danger!”

Kyle scoffs. "Being willing to die for something doesn't mean anything if you don't value your life enough to begin with. That's why you were the one to sacrifice yourself, right? You thought that, as an android, you were more expendable than your human teammates?"

Fear takes a cold grip on him as he processes the words.

“I- I am not-“ With shock, Zane realizes that… he doesn’t have a good argument.

His voice is quiet as he tries to come up with one. “I am expendable because the others have more use. It- it is not because I am a nindroid, it’s…”

He… doesn’t know what to say. How to defend himself. The- the others are more important than him, but- but that doesn’t mean that Zane is… that he’s…

Kyle shakes his head. "For something to have more use than something else, that other thing must be lesser. It's just logic.” He shrugs. “You said it yourself."

Zane finds himself looking down at the floor, breathing ragged, as he tries to come up with a way to deny the words. “No.” He chokes out. “No, that’s not what I…” He trails off, unsure of how to continue.

The smile he gets isn’t angry this time. No, it’s… almost comforting. "Think about it, alright?” His voice is reassuring, soothing. “You can't argue against logic."

Zane can feel himself shaking, his voice quiet and near breaking as he tries to say otherwise. “I’m not lesser, I’m not, I’m- I’m equal, I…”

Something seems to break inside of him as he realizes that it’s not Kyle that he’s trying to convince.

"Don't worry.” Kyle assures. “The confusion will be over soon."

Wordlessly, Zane gives a weak nod, not even sure what he’s agreeing to.

He’s not- not lesser, he’s just… sure, the others are more valuable, more skilled, more- more everything, but…

Kyle calls in some guards, but Zane can barely hear him. "Take them back to their lockers.” He instructs. “Someone will come fetch them when we find the bird."

Cryptor speaks quickly, clear fear in his voice. “It’s connected to us, I- I can call it.”

Zane can hear their voices, but he’s unsure of the meaning behind the words. He can barely process his own thoughts, much less the world around him.

[baseballbitch116]

The Vest

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x reader

Prompt: The reader helps Judith with a gift for Daryl

Setting: Based off of S10E11

Word Count: 1451

Warnings: A little bit of angst - mostly just fluff

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[gif belongs to @jaaryl]

*A follow up to The Poncho

A/N: Here’s a little fluff/angst imagine for some comfort from our favorite archer during these hard times. I hope everyone is staying safe - we will get through this! My inbox is open if anyone needs a friend to talk to ♥

You had been making little presents for Daryl ever since the prison. You had gifted him a poncho, which he loved and still had to this day. You like to put your skills to use to crochet clothes and blankets for the people of Alexandria and Hilltop. You tended to be the person that everyone went to when they needed something mended or blankets needed made for winter approaching. Whenever you had down time, you would work on little gifts for different people - Daryl being the most common one.

You’d like to think that the poncho you made for him all those years ago was the beginning of when your friendship began blossoming into something more. Now, nearly ten years later, you’ve been with the archer for a couple of which. He still gets shy to this day when you gift him different things, whether it be something you made him or something you found on a run. You love Daryl and look for any opportunity to spoil him.

This had all come about because you gifted Judith with a handmade quilt. She absolutely adored it and brought up you teaching her how to repair clothes. A few days after beginning to teach her, she took notice of how torn apart Daryl’s winged vest was becoming, which she brought up to you. She wanted to surprise her favorite uncle by repairing the faded away wing on the vest - but she needed your help. You loved the idea, knowing Daryl would be very happy - he loved that vest.

So over the next few days, you and Judith would spend an hour or two each night working on the vest. Daryl thought that he had lost it, which made it all the better. He asked you if you had seen it anywhere, pretty upset that he couldn’t seem to find it. You played along, helping him “look for it” throughout your shared house. Eventually, Daryl gave up, defeated and mad that he lost it. You felt bad that he was upset but you knew it would only make the surprise so much better.

And so, after over a week of working on it together, you and Judith finished up repairing the wing on his vest. Everyone was preparing for the horde to come through Hilltop, and it seemed like a good time for some heartfelt moments. You gave the vest to Judith and told her you would meet her downstairs, finishing getting ready in the spare room. When you came out of the room, Daryl had just come over to see Judith - sitting on the love-seat. You knew that she was upset, she had been all day - this was supposed to try to ease her worries. You waited in the hall above the stairs, giving them a moment - Judith needs her Uncle Daryl right now.

“Hey,” Daryl calls out softly as he approaches Judith, limping slightly as he walks. You cringe at the sight, anger flowing through your veins at the sight of your man so beat up. Alpha would pay for what she did to him. “You should be with the other kids.”

“I wanna help.” You smile as Judith stands, crossing her arms and giving Daryl that same look that Michonne does. This girl certainly was Rick and Michonne’s daughter. “I can fight.”

“I know ya can. I’m sorry about today... You didn’t need to see those bodies like that.” Your smile drops into a sad one at the memory of more of your people fallen at the hands of the Whisperers. Daryl had no reason to apologize, it was them who needed to pay. You lean against the railing as they continue talking, your mind wandering as fear begins to work its way back into your veins.

“I’m not scared.” Judith insists, her doe eyes saying otherwise.

“I know yer not. Maybe I am, a little bit.” Daryl confesses, his tone dropping slightly. Your heart warms, a memory of Daryl screaming at you that “he ain’t afraid of nothin” hitting you. He’s come such a long way over the years, he’s almost unrecognizable to the man you first met back in Atlanta. Judith goes on confessing things she might be afraid of, your heart sinking when she says she’s afraid of losing Daryl.

Tears well in your eyes at the thought of ever losing him, which you rapidly blink away. You can’t think like that.

“There ain’t no shame in that... You know who you’re fighting for.” Daryl responds. You watch as Judith lifts the vest off of the chair, holding it up for him to see. He brings a hand over his mouth and grins widely, your own smile forming at his. “It’s for luck.” Judith smiles.

“No way,” He says, taking the vest from her hands “I love it.” He throws it on, turning around for her to see. “How do I look?” He asks, making Judith giggle. You smile and stand up straight, getting ready to head down to speak to Daryl before the fight begins.

“It looks good.” Your heart flutters when Daryl chuckles in response. You adore that little laugh of his.

You make your way down the long stairs, both of their eyes turning to look up at you. Daryl’s smile grows when you make eye contact, your heart skipping in your chest as you come down. “There’s one more thing.” Daryl sighs, bending slightly to look into Judith’s eyes as you head over to them. “If during the fight, Y/N comes looking for you and RJ... You go with her. Whether you know where I am or not. Okay?” He asks. You place your hand on her back as her head drops. “Hey? You gotta promise me.”

After a moment, Judith nods lightly, looking up at Daryl then at you. “I promise.” Daryl smiles again and pulls her into a hug, looking up at you as he hugs her. You blink away tears hastily as they hug, all sorts of emotions overwhelming you.

After they part, Judith smiles up at you then starts heading out to be with the other kids. You look up into Daryl’s eyes, sadness overwhelming you. He chews at his bottom lip for a second before you step into his arms and hug his torso. He hugs you back immediately, something that he has learned over the years with you. You take a deep breath to calm yourself, his comforting smell washing around you as you lean in his chest.

“Hey,” He says, pulling back enough to look at you. “We’re gonna be okay.” He assures you. You nod and smile sadly, blinking away fresh tears. Daryl raises his hand and brushes them away with the back of his hand, his rough hand stroking your cheek gently. You lean into his touch and close your eyes.

“I can’t lose you...” You mutter, bringing your hand up to cup his on your cheek, pressing a kiss to it before meeting his blue eyes.

“You won’t.” He promises, pulling you back into his chest. You stay like that for a moment, enveloped in each other’s arms, appreciating one another for what could be the last time. He presses a kiss to the top of your head and you move back, arms still wrapped around his torso, leaning your face up to look up at him. Your eyes drop to his pink lips before going back to his blue eyes. The look you make drives him crazy, he could never get enough of you in his arms.

Daryl leans in slightly, pressing his forehead to yours and looking into your eyes. Your raise your face just enough and press your lips against his very gently. His arms around your body tighten, holding you close in the soft, slow kiss. He normally didn’t like to show so much PDA outside of your room, but this time was different. A war was just outside those gates. You part slowly, foreheads pressed together and breathing heavily - soaking in the intimate moment.

When you pull away, you shoot him a smile, nodding your head at him in a way you’ve picked up from him over the years. “Lemme see it.” You smile. His grin returns and he turns, showing you the vest.

“You like it?” You ask as he turns back around.

“O’course. You been teaching her?” He asks, referring to Judith.

“Yeah. She wanted to surprise you.”

“You two are the best.” He smiles, throwing his arm over your shoulder. “C’mon. We got a fight to win.” And so you follow him out of the doors, heading toward the gates to prepare for battle - knowing exactly what the two of you are fighting for.

---

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[mcfanely]

Nightowls

Having someone be aware of a secret isn’t always a bad thing. It can sometimes be a relief even, the knowledge that someone else knows. That you’re not on your own anymore. That there’s someone to talk to. 

Chapter 09 - You Seem Happy, 2477 words

The walk back to the Monastery was pleasant that morning, even though they were a little later getting away from the studio than Cole would have personally liked. A full conversation with Chamille when the studio announced it was time to clear out for closing about actually organising a day to meet up with the other elemental masters; because there really didn't need to be a world ending disaster as an excuse to be in the same place at once. Then Lloyd and her had gotten to talking whilst Cole had excused himself to clean off in the bathroom; well that resulted in them leaving as the sun was cresting over the horizon line, more than an hour behind when he usually left. 

Lloyd could really talk sometimes. 

Yet it had been a relaxed silence since they'd set off. Cole was in a clean set of clothes, with a hoodie over the top to keep the morning chill away. The grass that sprung up at the side of the path was dusted with a light frost and a thin mist hung low over the lands. 

He took in a deep breath, enjoying the cool sensation that was brought with it. 

Then Lloyd turned to him, poised as if he was about to break the silence that had settled, which he promptly did, "So, that was fun." He grinned, shoving his hands into his pockets which didn't hinder the bounce in his step. "I mean, dancing is one thing, but you and Chamille not even having a plan?"

"Free-styling." Cole provided casually. 

"Free-styling. And a random song too, it was brutal giving you opera music, I mean, how do you even dance to that? Then you and Chamille were just like," Lloyd made a half-attempt at doing the robot, with an elaborated, "Woosh!" 

"And then, then Chamille was all like," An arm wave, a pretty good one if Cole's eyebrows shooting up was anything to go by. Though he just carried on watching the scene with a small smile, and the fact that Lloyd was basically dancing down the single dirt road that led back to the Monastery. It was a long trip, but he had a feeling it would go fast. 

"And then you were--" 

"Lloyd," Cole interrupted quickly, placing a hand onto his shoulder, "You haven't slept all night, you're getting your second wind. Take a breath."

Lloyd paused and did as he was told, though he was still smiling far too much for that hour of the morning. 

"You were so cool!" 

He'd said that multiple times already, and Cole was starting to believe it. 

"You can't tell anyone." He added after a short second and maybe half a block down the path. 

Lloyd kicked a pebble in his way, before nodding his understanding. He brushed some hair back from his face, "I know, I know. You said so earlier."

Even then, with that vein of conversation at a resolute end, Lloyd still looked like he had something to say. Cole tilted his head, "What?" 

"I'm not shocked you got into Marty's."

That was a bit off track, Cole rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. 

"Yeah, well--" 

"You've been sneaking out for a while, haven't you?" 

There it was, the supposed crux of the conversation. Abrupt, but sort of expected if he was being honest. If he took into account the clear worry that everyone had expressed, it was obvious that this talk was going to turn into an insightful one-to-one. 

There wasn't much point in lying anymore, so Cole simply nodded, "a couple months."

He didn't miss Lloyd's wince, "Have you even been sleeping?" 

"Big talk coming from the guy who knows I've been sneaking out, staying up and spying?" 

Lloyd's eyes widened, then he schooled his expression and fixed his gaze on the path ahead. They'd get to a woodland soon, and then the base of a far too long staircase, then home. 

"Don't try and change the subject, Cole."

There was a nervous laugh, and he was more than content to let everything go back to silence again. Just the sound of crunching gravel beneath their feet and the intermittent noise of bones popping as Cole went through his joints to help release any pressure, but eventually the evasion tactic wore out, and he relented. "It started because I wasn't sleeping." He explained losely, "Or like, when I went to sleep all I had was nightmares." 

There, he'd said it. 

Lloyd seemed to falter in his walk, almost drawing to a full stop as he watched and listened with far too much maturity for someone his age, and too much focus for someone who was wide awake at near six in the morning. 

He was going to crash so hard around lunch time, Cole could tell a mile off. 

Yet this time, the silence was a physical feeling. Cole had finished making his point, it wasn't in depth, but it was there. Yet Lloyd's staring just brought more words to the surface, "Of, you know, when I fell from the Bounty."

There's a pregnant pause, and Cole cleared a lump from his throat. 

"It's all I could think about and I would just wake up panicking--" 

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" Lloyd questioned, with concern lacing his voice. 

Cole just brushed it off, but the worry was warranted. If it was anyone of his family in the same situation he was in, he'd be worried for them too. Maybe that was a testament to what they were actually feeling in that moment. He would feel hurt if someone kept something like this from him, since Cole knew he could help in some way. "A walk fixed it, I didn't want to annoy anyone."

"Cole, it's not annoying if you need help. We're all here to help you with whatever problems you have. That's what family's for." 

Cole shrugged, smiled, then focused his attention on some of the neon orange paint stuck under his nails. He picked at that, stared at it.

"I know that." he whispered. Of course he knew that, he knew that he could have turned to anyone and asked for help, or just someone to talk to and have them listen. Even Jay would have taken the situation seriously, he wasn't always so immature. Cole had to give him some credit. "I just… Found something that made me forget about my problems. At Nightowls, I have, like, a life." He paused, considering how that sounded, "Not that I don't have one at the Monastery, with you guys, but--" 

"It's something normal." Lloyd said. Hit the nail on the head. 

Yes.

Cole laughed, and nodded, "Yeah. I've never had that. My dad's a famous singer, I was expected to follow in his footsteps in some way, I went to Marty's and then I ran away, then I became a Ninja." his life, summed up. In a way, everyone's lives paralleled that in some way. Particularly the one he was talking to in that moment.

Feeling as though they had to follow in their father's footsteps only to realise that they had their own lives to live, even if it was vastly different from what had been envisioned for them. 

"You were really good, though."

Cole laughs. 

"You were, though. You seemed so… Relaxed."

Cole draped one arm over Lloyd's shoulder and pulled him into a sideways hug, which dissolved into him ruffling the younger ninja's hair to within an inch of its life. "Do I not normally look relaxed?" 

"No," Lloyd managed out in the midst of batting at Cole's hand and arm until he was released, at which point he moved over to the safety of the other side of the path. Not that Cole couldn't reach him from where he was situated, "recently you've looked tired." He sighed, then his voice dipped in volume, and he just sounded that bit more worried, "We've all noticed, you know? We knew something was bothering you." Lloyd admitted slowly, then "We just… Wanted to wait for you to bring it up."

At that point, Cole realised that him bringing the issue up would have probably never happened by his own choice. He'd planned to, that first night. Then he just hadn't. 

They eventually made it into the woodland, sunlight moving through the gaps in the canopy crafted by crown shyness, leaves dusting the road. 

"How're the nightmares now?" Lloyd's voice was loud amongst silence. 

Cole ran a hand through his hair, "Honestly, better." He admitted, then paused, "Actually, I haven't had one recently, I didn't realise that."

Lloyd smiled, "Because you've been distracted by sneaking away and having fun."

"I mean, yeah, technically I have." He smiled, "I've been spending days training and nights dancing, truly I am living a double life." 

They both shared a laugh. 

"I mean, you're basically a dance vigilante with that mask."

Cole gave Lloyd a deadpan expression, "Never say those words together again."

Lloyd smirked, "Ninja by day," 

"Lloyd--" 

"Dancer by night."

"I swear to the First--" 

Lloyd quickly moved forwards and plucked Cole's mask from his belt, then pulled it on himself. There was a bit of adjusting, and the elastic was a little too large, but he got it comfortably sat on his nose at least. 

In the light of day, it was a funny sight. Lloyd, entirely dressed in green with a bright orange mask on that was definitely not as impressive as it was in the dark. 

"This is uncomfortable." He said after a moment. 

Cole just nodded, "It hurts the ears."

Lloyd took it off and stared at it, "It hurts the nose too. I don't know how you wear this and dance, you could have put some cushioning in it."

"I don't notice it when I'm dancing."

"A dragon would have been cooler, and it would have made sense."

Cole took the mask out of Lloyd's hands and held it to his chest, "Wow, I know when my talents aren't appreciated." He smirked, "Besides, it's sort of a joke. Deception, no one knows who I am underneath--" 

"And no one knows what you do when you sneak out."

He just blanked that quip, "And wearing the face of a species that was nearly responsible for my death is sorta cathartic. I wear it and I have fun."

"You looked like you were loving it."

Cole grinned, "Yeah. I never thought I'd dance again, to be honest. Not like that."

They finally reached the stairs up to the Monastery and the sun was a lot higher than he would have liked. If it was early, they could sneak in and everyone would be none the wiser. Any time after six was when their absence would be noticed. 

So reaching the top of the stairs would end in an interrogation and questioning, most likely. Cole hoped not. 

Lloyd started on the stairs first, but as far as Cole was concerned they were always the worst part of the night. It was easier to go down them.

"So, planning on sneaking out again tonight?" the younger ninja asked as they began the climb. 

"I don't know, maybe?" He'd probably give it a rest for a day or so. His sleep was nowhere close to being fixed, but he knew that if he managed to stay awake for the rest of the day, there was no way he could pull another all-nighter. He did it once, and regretted his decision immensely. 

Also, he knew what Lloyd was actually asking about, "To be honest, I'll probably sleep tonight and go tomorrow. Why, you want to tag along again?" 

The silence that followed was an answer in itself, and Cole just laughed, "You're sleeping tonight too. If Sensei Wu doesn't have my neck for you being up most of the night, then I know Kai will."

"Why would they blame you?" 

"Because I'm the one in charge." Cole spread his heads as if it was obvious. 

"And it's not like they would know I've been awake all night."

"You're starting to look like you've been dragged through the Boiling Sea backwards and then faced off against Sensei Wu's chicken. You look tired."

"Touché."

As they neared the top of the stairs, Cole began fiddling with the mask of the strap. He had all his old clothes in a bag over his shoulder but it was already pretty full to begin with, and he didn't have the heart to try and push the mask in too. 

Which left him resorting to holding it subtly behind his back, using the bagginess of the back of his hoodie to shield it from view as they stepped through the gates and into the monastery. 

Into the middle of morning training. They were so going to get found out, Cole was so going to get busted for what he'd been doing. Lloyd was going to slip up, it was obvious. 

Even as Kai walked over, sword sheathed over his back and spiked hair drooping from exertion, his cut eyebrow was raised and his gaze far too analytical. 

He had been doing so well, too. He could already feel his heart rate picking up, but externally he forced himself to keep his cool, "Hey, sorry we’re late."

"You guys didn't even leave a note.” Was the immediate response, and it was tense, “It's one thing Cole not being here and not telling us, but both of you?" Kai questioned, and the speed of which his hands were moving was an indication of emotion that he was trying to keep in check. 

Cole winced lightly, "Yeah, sorry. I didn't think, my bad. We were just--" 

Lloyd quickly stepped forwards and gave a slight smile, which seemed to quickly sway Kai's mood in a second. Big brother instincts, they could dial back just as fast as they surfaced. 

"We just went on a walk, spoke a little." He looked back at Cole and grinned. "I should have written a note but I didn't. We sort of… Just needed to get out for a bit." 

He was covering, Cole realised. He'd probably been thinking of an excuse for the whole walk. Something he'd forgotten to even do. 

He had to force himself to not look impressed as the words rolled easily from Lloyd's lips. Even he believed them, and he knew the truth. 

Kai seemed to cool down, and looked at Cole, "Are you okay?"

He let out a breath, and nodded, "I am now. The walk was good. I'm all good."

"Good." Kai nodded, then added, "You know we're all here to talk to if you need it."

Cole just gave a light laugh and nodded, carefully keeping the mask situated behind his back, "Yeah. Yeah, I know. Thanks, you guys. That means a load."

He looked at Lloyd. 

"Thank you."

-

From the beginning

Ch 08 > Ch 09

AO3

Notes: And thus concludes Nightowls, thank you so much for reading!

[metaphorical-love-for-a-car]

Sunshine After Rain-- Connor (RK800) x Reader (Part 4)

Summary; After the death of your little brother, Cole, your dad hated androids. He blamed them for Cole's death. Hank couldn't stand to be around them. How the hell are you supposed to tell him that your soulmate is an android?

Warnings; swearing, shitty writing that has not been edited at all

Word Count; 2.9k

Notes; I’ll post the last part tomorrow morning!! Then I’ll move on to original fics lol

You sat on the bench and covered your face with your hands. That was not at all how you wanted it to go. You wanted to sit Hank down and discuss it with him— mainly when he was sober. Connor sat next to you. You let your hands fall into your lap and stared straight ahead. You could tell he was staring at you. "You seem troubled." You let out a sardonic laugh.

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock." You turned to face him and realized that he was actually concerned. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm just... a bit stressed is all," you sighed. Connor nodded.

"I understand. I suppose I have been experiencing a sense of stress as well. I was designed to hunt down deviants. I'm supposed to be a machine, nothing more. Then I met you, and I've begun to doubt everything." You each looked into each other's eyes for a moment. You broke eye contact and looked at his hands, carefully taking one into your own. You turned to look at the city lights. This time, you saw just how beautiful they really were in their full color. You pulled away from him to stand, quietly walking away. Connor didn't move. He was too deep in thought... which made him the perfect target.

You knelt down and scooped up a small pile of snow, forming it into a sphere. A wicked smile crossed your face as you stood once more. You narrowed your eyes, focusing on the sitting duck before you. You were more aiming for his back, but the place it hit was even better. The snowball hit the back of Connor's head with a soft thump. The android quickly leapt to his feet. His LED was flashing. You laughed, scooping up another snowball. He seemed confused. "(y/n), what exactly are you doing?" You threw the snowball at him. Since he was anticipating it, Connor easily dodged the projectile.

"It's a snowball fight. You throw snow at each other until someone gives up. We used to have giant wars all the time when we were kids." While you knelt down to make a couple more snowballs, Connor grinned mischievously.

"Are you sure you want to have a snowball fight with me, (y/n)?"

"Of course, I wouldn't have started one otherwise," you scoffed. Next thing you knew, you were being pelted by perfectly round balls of snow. You squealed as some of the snow made its way down your back. You ran behind a tree for cover. You somehow managed to hit him a few times, but you were pretty sure it was because he was going easy on you.

About ten minutes into the battle, you tried to dodge one and ended up getting yourself hit in the head. Sure, it hurt, considering your mishap earlier, but you dramatized it. You fell to your knees and held your head, hissing a couple swears. You heard Connors footsteps rapidly approaching. He knelt down beside you, placing a hand on your back. "(y/n), are you-" He was interrupted by you shoveling snow in his face with a maniacal laugh. Connor did not look amused.

"I'm sorry, Connor. I just couldn't help myself," you explained in between laughs. Connor noticed you had started shivering and suggested that you head back. He helped you to your feet. The two of you started walking back to Hank's car, occasionally bumping shoulders along the way. As soon as you got the engine started, you cranked the heat all the way up and held your hands over the air vents.

"Should we attempt to track down Hank?" You shook your head.

"No, he's probably too drunk to reason with at this point. I'm probably just gonna head back to my place. He's a big boy now. He knows how to walk home. I'll just pick him up in the morning." You paused, turning in the seat in order to fully face Connor. "I know you don't sleep, so where do you go at night?"

"I usually stay at the precinct in the designated area for androids on standby." You wrinkled your nose.

"That sounds boring. You're more than welcome to hang out at my place if you want. It's not very big, but I have plenty of things to read. You can watch TV too if you want, or… I don't know," you rambled, fiddling with the hem of your shirt. Connor grinned.

"I would like that. Thank you, (y/n)." You smiled back at him, driving toward your apartment complex.

You groaned as your alarm started screaming at you to wake up. Your head was killing you, and you wanted nothing more than to chuck the contraption out the window. You reached into the nightstand drawer and pulled out a bottle of painkillers. You swallowed two of the pills and returned the bottle to its place. As you sat up, a certain scent hit your nose that caused you to shuffle into the kitchen at a slightly faster pace than usual. Your eyes widened at the sight. A smile grew across your face. "Connor, you cooked breakfast?" The android held out a plate of pancakes alongside various fruits.

"I wanted to thank you for allowing me into your home last night, and, as the expression goes, breakfast is the most important meal of the day." He smiled at you. If he were any more adorable than at this very moment, you would have surely imploded. You gently took the plate from his hands, and you could feel the heat rising in your cheeks as you sat on the couch. After you finished eating, you quickly got ready for work. You still had to pick up Hank, and there was no doubt in your mind that he would be hungover and a pain in the ass to get up.

You parked his old car in front of his house. You and Connor used your spare set of keys to get into the house. "Dad! Wake up, it's time to get ready for work!" you hollered as the two of you entered the home. You walked into the kitchen and pulled out a bin full of dog food from one of the cabinets. Sumo padded into the kitchen and wagged his tail at the sight of you filling his food bowl.

"Hello, Lieutenant." You poked your head around the corner when you heard Connor greet Hank. Much to your surprise, he was dressed and ready to go. You opened your mouth to comment on it, but Hank raised a hand to stop you.

"Yeah, yeah, I know, but the last thing I need is another document in my disciplinary file just for being late." You tossed him the car keys. He stuffed them in his pocket. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go."

Not long after entering the precinct, Hank and Connor were pulled aside to be given a new case. You sat at your desk and laid your head down for a moment. Your head was still throbbing, and the last thing you wanted to do was paperwork. You skipped out on doing any yesterday since you tagged along with Hank. Now the mass of papers on your desk resembled a mountain.

After what seemed like an eternity of doing paperwork, you felt like you were doing insane. You could've sworn that you were starting to smell sounds. Enough is enough. You stood from your desk and sauntered into the break room. As you walked through the bullpen, you heard Gavin mention to someone that he needed some coffee. You smiled and fixed your own cup. You quickly swapped the tops of the salt and sugar shakers. When you saw Gavin enter the small room, you snatched a donut from one of the many boxes littering the counter. He gave you a curt nod as he fixed himself some coffee. You bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from laughing when he dumped what he assumed was sugar into the dark liquid. He took a sip of the coffee and grimaced down at the mug. You burst out laughing. Gavin narrowed his eyes at you as he realized you had sabotaged his drink, but he wasn't going to give you the satisfaction of it. Maintaining eye contact, Gavin lifted the drink back up to his lips and drank every last drop of the salty liquid. You gaped at him, shocked that he actually drank it. He set the cup on the counter and gave you the middle finger. "Try again next time, (y/n)." Gavin turned on his heel and left you dumbfounded.

You continued to eat the donut in your hand while nursing your coffee. You saw Hank and Connor walk in. Hank went straight to his desk, while Connor roamed around. He looked like he was looking for something. He turned towards the break room and caught sight of you. You had finished your snack and was throwing away the trash. Without warning, a pair of arms wrapped around you and a head rested on your shoulder. Colors began to fill in the objects around you. You furrowed your brows, wondering what brought on this sudden burst of affection from the android. You turned to face him. He kept his hands on your arms while you cupped his face with your own. Something was seriously bothering him. "What's wrong?" Connor drew in a shaky breath.

"We were on the roof of Stratford Tower. A damaged deviant was left behind, and I tried to probe its memory. Then... then it self-destructed. Right after it shot itself, I felt it die." His grip on your arms slightly tightened. "It felt like I was dying. I was... I was scared, (y/n)." You gently rubbed your thumb against his cheek. He leaned into your touch. There was no doubt that he was terrified. You could see it written all over his face. You pulled him into an embrace, which he gladly accepted. He was still fighting an internal battle, trying to decide whether he was a living being or not. He needed comfort, which is something he saw in you. For the rest of the afternoon, Connor didn't stray far from your side. He almost reminded you of a lost puppy.

The next morning, you walked out of the kennel that was located in the back of the precinct, only to run into a familiar face. You smiled up at the android. "G'morning," you greeted.

"Good morning, (y/n). Hank and I will be going to Elijah Kamski's residence in five minutes. Would you like to accompany us on this case?" You softly laughed at how formal Connor was. He watched your reaction curiously.

"Yeah, I feel like he'd be an interesting person to meet." Connor grinned at your response. The two of you tracked down Hank and followed him to his old, beat up car. You and Hank had yet discussed the whole soulmate situation. In fact, you both had kind of been avoiding it. He was too stubborn to bring it up first, and you just weren't sure how to approach the subject seeing as how he reacted last time. Despite this, the car ride wasn't too terrible, other than Hank forcing you and Connor to listen to heavy metal nonstop. As he parked near the front of Kamski's place, Hank got a phone call from one of your fellow officers-- Chris. Turns out, he was attacked by a group of deviants but ended up being saved by Markus, the leader of the deviant rebellion.

The three of you hopped out of the car. You wrapped your coat tighter around yourself as the cold air and snow hit your face. As you all walked up to the front door, Connor asked why Hank wanted to meet Kamski. "This guy created the first android to pass the Turing test, and he's the founder of CyberLife. If anybody can tell us about deviants, it's him," Hank answered as if it was obvious. He rang the doorbell, and you three waited several minutes for someone to answer.

"This guy better answer soon or we're gonna turn into popsicles." Hank rolled his eyes at you. You all perked up when the door swung open, revealing a blonde android.

"Hi, uh, I'm Lieutenant Hank Anderson from the Detroit Police Department. We're here to see, er, Mr. Elijah Kamski," he stuttered out. You gave him an odd look.

"Please, come in." She smiled sweetly and motioned you all inside.

"Very smooth, dad," you said in a hushed tone.

"Shut up, (y/n)." You followed the android lady inside. She told the three of you to make yourselves comfortable while she let Kamski know you all had arrived. Hank sat down in a nearby chair. You stared at the giant portrait of Kamski that was in front of you.

"Very humble man, wouldn't you agree?" You turned to Connor, sarcasm dripping from your words. He hummed, nodding.

"Yes, you can hardly tell he's a billionaire," Connor answered just as sarcastically. You beamed.

"Nice, you're finally starting to understand slang and sarcasm." Connor looked slightly proud, taking in your statement as a compliment. You took a seat across from Hank as Connor continued to analyze the threshold. Hank made a couple comments about Connor meeting his creator but otherwise stayed pretty quiet. You all looked up when Kamski's android returned.

"Elijah will see you now," she announced before leading the three of you into another room, which contained an indoor pool. You noticed that he had a couple more androids, all the same model. You all awkwardly stood off to the side, waiting for Kamski to finish his laps around the pool. As he climbed out of the water, one of his many androids wrapped a robe around him.

"I'm Lieutenant Hank Anderson, this is Detective (y/n), and Connor," Hank introduced you all.

"What can I do for you, officers?" Hank informed Kamski that they were investigating deviants and that any information he had would be useful to them. He remained silent, thinking.

"Holy shit, he looked so much like Gavin," you muttered under your breath. Kamski hummed.

"Yes, my half-brother works in the same department as you two. Now, deviants... Fascinating, aren't they? Perfect beings with infinite intelligence, and now they have free will." He went on to talk about how androids are better than humans, spouting a bunch of philosophical junk you didn't bother to follow. Hank asked Kamski to tell him something useful or you would all be on your way. Instead of addressing the topic at hand, Kamski approached Connor. "How about you, Connor? What do you really want?"

"I fail to see how that matters with what we are currently trying to discuss." Kamski said nothing for a moment, staring Connor down. He then called over one of his androids, Chloe. He explained that the Turing test is merely a formality. What interested him is whether machines are capable of empathy or not. He opened a drawer and pulled out a gun. Chloe sat on her knees. He handed the weapon to Connor.

"Destroy this machine, and I'll tell you all I know. Or spare it, if you feel it's alive, but you'll leave here without having learnt anything from me." Connor held the gun as his LED flashed wildly. Hank tried to get Connor to put the gun down, but Kamski kept egging him on. "Decide who you are. An obedient machine or a living being endowed with free will? Pull the trigger, and I'll tell you all that you want to know."

"Connor." The RK800 turned his head to look at you. You opened your mouth to say something but closed it, thinking of the right words to say. "You already know the answer to who you are. I've seen it over the past few days. You don't have to be scared." Kamski's eyes flickered between the two of you. Connor lowered the gun, keeping his eyes trained on you.

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY.

"Fascinating..." Kamski breathed. "CyberLife's last chance to save humanity is itself a deviant."

"I'm..." Connor trailed off, looking troubled. Kamski started talking philosophically again, and Hank grumbled about how you all should just get out of there. An idea popped into your head.

"I could tell you just how alive androids are in exchange for a piece of information." Kamski turned towards you, intrigue filling his eyes.

"Go on." You took Connor's hand into your own. The android visibly calmed. You gave him a reassuring smile before looking at Kamski once more.

"Androids have more in common with humans than you realize. They have soulmates too." Kamski's eyes widened as he stepped closer to the two of you.

"It's not possible."

"As much as I doubted it too, they're telling the truth." You looked over at Hank. He nodded at you, a soft smile tugging at the corner of his lips. Kamski stepped back, turning to look out of the large window. He was quiet for a moment but eventually held his end of the bargain.

"I always install an emergency exit in all of my programs. You never know..." he trailed off with a shrug. The three of you looked at each other, confusion written all over your features. When Kamski said nothing else, you all took that as your cue to leave.

~*~*~

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Under the Stars

Written for @ninjaneverquit-zine

[AO3 LINK]

summary: Jay and Zane have their first official date after regaining the bounty from Garmadon.

Jay is happy that they finally got the bounty back from Garmadon and those snakes. Now they can properly start training Lloyd! Not in Dareths dojo, as... interesting as Dareth is. Or in that dingy old apartment, they were staying in for the time being.

Something he’s going to miss is sharing a bed with Zane, though. 

“We can still always share one,” he says with a shrug. Waiting for the milk to boil in the kettle so they can have hot chocolate.

“I know.” Jay leans against the counter, it’s their first official date, and they’re going to spend it under the stars in the sky on the deck of the bounty. “At least the beds will be more comfortable.”

Zane chuckles, “yes, they will be.” 

They spent a while cleaning it up and refurbishing it back to its former glory after Garmadon and the serpentine have been living in it for a while. The mess wasn’t too bad, but there still was some mess left behind from the snakes. 

Zane gets down a couple of mugs out of the cabinet for the two of them. “I don’t think I’ve ever had hot chocolate with milk before?”

Jay gasps, “a travesty. A crime.” 

“Oh no, I hope I can pay for my crimes.” 

“You will, one day.” 

“Gross! Stop flirting!” Lloyd whines at the kitchen door.

“Hey kiddo, what’s up? Need anything?” Jay asks.

“I was just coming to maybe get a snack, and you two are in here being gross!” the young green ninja says with disgust in his voice.

“You can have some crackers. Don’t want you staying up too late,” Zane tells the young boy. 

This makes Lloyd whine again. “Fine.” he mumbles, watching as the white ninja gets down a bowl and the box of Tritz crackers, putting a few in the bowl and handing it to him, “thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now go bother Kai.”

Lloyd cackles, “if he complains about it, I’m going to tell him you sent me.” he says as he walks out the door. 

“That’s fine.”

“Gotta love the kid, even if he can be a little pain in the ass.” Jay grins and gets the hot chocolate packets out of the cabinet. 

“Thats true, It’s really hard not to love him now.” Zane smiles back and pulls Jay into a hug, who hums happily.

Wiggling out of Zane’s hold, Jay pours the hot chocolate mixture into the mugs, he grabs a couple of spoons. “Do we have whipped cream?” he asks Zane. 

“We should.” the nindroid says and looks into the fridge, “yes, we do.” he puts the whipped cream on the counter. “What else do you want on your hot chocolate?”

“Chocolate syrup? Sprinkles?” 

“Now this just sounds like ice cream.” Zane teases. “We have both.” 

“We don’t have to use sprinkles. But chocolate syrup is a must.” Jay says taking the chocolate syrup out of his boyfriend’s hands and puts it next to the whipped cream. 

“You’re the hot chocolate expert here, so I will follow your lead,” he says, taking the pot off the burner as steam starts to come out of it and pours the milk into the hot chocolate mixture. Jay takes his mug and mixes the hot chocolate and milk together.

Zane watches as Jay puts an ungodly amount of whipped cream on top of his hot chocolate with a raised eyebrow, “that’s a lot of whipped cream.” he says plainly.

Jay shrugs, and before Zane can react, he reaches up and sprays a small amount onto the nindroids nose and cackles. 

He blinks, “you’re funny.” he says and wipes it off of his nose with a smile.

Jay laughs again, “do you want some on yours?”

Zane hums, “sure, please don’t put as much whipped cream onto mine as you did to yours.” 

“I won’t!” he says and puts a reasonable amount onto Zanes before grabbing the chocolate sauce and putting some onto the whipped cream on both of theirs. “Okay, maybe I put a little too much whipped cream on mine.” he says with a nervous laugh as some whipped cream drips down the sides of his mug.

“I said it was a lot.” Zane says as Jay grumbles and licks some whipped cream off the top. “Would you like a paper towel?” he offers a sheet to his boyfriend, who takes it and wipes the dripping whipped cream off the mug.

“Anyway. Let’s go out onto the deck! I missed just looking up at the sky and seeing the stars! It’s not the same in the city.” 

“It isn’t. You can barely see them there.” 

“Yeah! And it sucks!” Jay takes his mug and takes a sip and smiles widely. 

“I’m assuming its good?” 

“Mhm!” 

“I am glad.” he takes a sip of his own. “I believe I prefer hot chocolate this way now.” he declares

Jay gives him a wide grin. “Let’s go!” he takes Zanes hand in his and leads him out to the deck of the bounty and sits in the middle of the deck.

“Would you like me to get some blankets and pillows?” Zane asks.

“Sure! It’s a little chilly.” 

Zane sets his mug on the ground next to Jay and heads below deck to grab what he needs. Grabbing a couple of pillows from the linen closet along with a couple of blankets. He turns and almost walks directly into Cole.

“Oh- I apologize.” 

“It’s cool, things are going well?”

Zane nods, a blush creeping up onto his face, and Cole laughs “I’m taking that as a yes.” 

“Y-yeah. I think I might love him. Like a lot.” 

“Are you going to tell him tonight? Isn’t it like your first official date or something?” 

“I was thinking about it. I don’t know if I should since we have not been dating for very long, and yes, it is our first.” he wants to bury his face into the pillows.

“I mean, I don’t know a lot about romance, it’s not really my strong point being ace, but you can take as long as you want to. I think he would feel the same if you said it.” cole says with a smile, clapping the nindroid on the shoulder.

“Thank you, cole. I must go now. He is waiting for me and my hot chocolate is getting cold.” 

He returns to find Jay sitting at the same spot he was before, and even though it’s dark, he can clearly see the look of wonder on his face as he stares up at the night sky. How it lights up when he sees him with pillows and blankets. How much he… loves the blue ninja. He loves him. He loves Jay. He loves Jay with all of his being, his core. 

“I was wondering when you were going to appear again,” he says, standing up and putting his hot chocolate on the ground, which he suspects is mostly gone now. “What took you so long?” he takes the pillows and puts them on the ground. 

“I got distracted in choosing which blankets would be the most optimal for tonight,” he says, half lying. 

Jay snorts, “hopefully your hot chocolate didn’t get too cold.”

“Yes. I hope it didn’t either,” he says a bit stiffly and nervously. He so desperately wants to tell Jay he loves him right this moment, but it doesn’t seem like it’s the right moment.

Jay gives him a worried look but shakes it off as soon as they both sit down with blankets wrapped around themselves. Comfortably protected against the wind and the cool air. 

“My parents would tell me about the stars a lot, we would look at constellations and they would tell me what they knew about them. It was really fun.” 

“I was not allowed to leave the tree at night. My father said it was too dangerous.” 

“Oh yeah, because of the Tree Horns?” 

“Correct.” he takes a sip of his hot chocolate. Still warm, but noticeably colder. “Did you know that the three stars at the top of the sky form a triangle?” he says, “it is called the summer triangle as it is most visible during the summer.” Zane points up to the sky, pointing out the shape and the stars.

“Woah.” jays eyes sparkle, much like the stars do, like lightning during a storm does. “I didn’t know that, that’s cool.”

“Yes, I suppose it is.” he smiles, his power source beats within him a bit faster. 

Jay shivers, wrapping the blanket tighter around him. The wind is picking up, making the already cool air turn chilly. Zane wraps an arm around Jay's shoulders, the blanket hanging over the blue ninja too.

“It’s really pretty, but man is it cold,” he says shivering again, but pressing up against Zane anyway, who probably doesn’t help because he is the ice ninja, and that he himself is also cold. Aside from the fact that he is a robot. But Jay doesn’t seem to mind.

“It… it truly is.”

“You okay?” Jay asks after a moment of silence between the two. “You’ve been acting a little funny since you got back with the blankets.”

“I am fine,” he says, looking away, a blush rising to his face. Is it time to say it?

“Seriously. Is something wrong? Are you not enjoying this? Do you have something wrong with your systems?” jay beings to ramble.

“No, no, no, none of that. I- I don’t know how to-” he pauses, looking back at jay with all the love he can muster, takes a deep breath he doesn’t really need, and ignoring the look of concern on his boyfriends face “I love you.” he says finally. 

“Oh- oh! I love you too! I-” he squeaks out in surprise. “Is that why you’ve been acting nervous?”

Zane nods, “I’ve been wanting to say it all day.” his smile returns, pulling jay in for an actual hug. 

“I’ve been wanting to do something too, actually. For a while now,” he says, facing Zane and sitting on his knees.

“What is it?”

“Um- close your eyes.” 

“Okay.” he closes his eyes.

Suddenly a pair of lips are on his, soft and warm, and a pair of hands cup his face. He opens his eyes just as jay releases him from the kiss. His eyes are wide. 

“I’ve been wanting to do that, too.” he laughs. 

Jay snorts and leans in for another one, an actual kiss this time.

He tastes like hot chocolate.

It’s nice.

He likes it.

Suddenly the two of them hear somebody whoop behind them and somebody shushing. Turning around, Zane sees the rest of the team watching the two of them. Lloyd looks disgusted while Cole sheepishly gives them the thumbs up.

“Kai!” Nya scolds, “you interrupted them!”

“Gross!” Lloyd whines, “why did you drag me out here?” 

“Kai wanted to spy on the two lovebirds, that’s why.” Cole says, leading the kid back inside. “I didn’t tell him to do this, by the way!” the earth ninja says as he walks down the stairs. 

Zane feels like he should be mad, but he isn’t. He’s just happy that he’s finally told Jay he loves him. Along with the fact that they have had their first kiss. 

Though, Jay must’ve looked unhappy because Nya drags Kai below deck, saying that he should apologize later.

Turning his attention back to his boyfriend, he pulls him for a hug.

“Well, that was ruined.” Jay grumbles into Zane’s chest. Listening to the subtle beat of his power core.

“I am sure Nya will have some words with Kai.” Zane says, “and besides, we can always have more.” 

“More what?” 

He puts a hand under Jay's chin and gives him another kiss, “more of those.”

Jay laughs, “I love you so much.” 

“I love you more.”

[colbybrocksmolder]

Colby’s Blanket Burrito (Colby Brock x Reader)

This is an old Conor Maynard fic I wrote years ago and someone requested I turn it into a Colby Brock fic. I think the story-line fits him well, but it’s okay if you don’t like this one. Enjoy. 

----------------------------------- Colby had been one of your best friends for about 6 years and it had been over a week since he had answered his phone or his door. The only way he got away with it was because Sam had been out of town for a friend’s wedding and ended up extending his trip.

"Babe, answer your phone. If you don't call me back, I'm breaking into your apartment." You said into the phone.

You didn't want to call Sam or Jake because It felt like you were betraying his trust, but you had to check on Colby. Assuming the rumors were true, his girlfriend cheated on him. He had finally decided to try publicly dating someone and this is how she treated him. Sam was flying back in two days and you weren't going to let him find Colby like you knew he'd be. Giving in, you had asked Jake where the spare key was and you were on your way over with chocolate, wine, and Chipotle. 

Letting yourself into the apartment, you realized it was as bad as you'd guessed. The trash hadn't been taken out, there were broken picture frames and broken glass by the front door, and the apartment was absolutely freezing. 

You spent about 30 minutes cleaning before heading to his bedroom, taking a minute to dump the trash and run the dishes, as well.

"Colby." You said, sad to see your friend like this. 

"Just leave." Was all he said, not moving from his blanket burrito. 

"Babe, I'm not going anywhere." You said, setting your supplies and his food down on his desk. 

"Well I'm not moving." He replied. 

"You don't have to for a few minutes. I need to clean up in here, anyways." His eyes followed you around the room. You picked up trash and cleaned up more glass. Gathered his laundry and picked up his bathroom. "Why is it so cold in here?" You asked. 

"The heater broke. Everything is fucking broken and I just don't care to fix any of it." Colby said, still acting like you weren't going to get him out of bed. 

Seeing that one of the picture frames had blood on it, you started to worry Colby had stepped on the glass. "Babe, did you cut your foot?" 

"Yes." He said, wiggling his foot out of his blanket burrito knowing you weren't going to drop it. 

"That's pretty bad. We need to clean it up." You said, gently running your fingers over the cut. Seeing Colby's foot flinch, you apologized. 

"It's not you." He said, his voice cracking. 

You absolutely hated seeing him look so broken. You crawled into the bed behind him and put your arms around his middle. You simply laid there with him until he had cried himself out of tears. "Please let me take care of you?" 

Colby nodded yes, and then made you laugh by saying "God I need to pee." 

"Go to the bathroom." You laughed, pulling his covers off of him.

When Colby went into his bathroom he didn't even bother closing the door. You quickly stripped his bed of its stinky sheets and blankets to chuck them in the washer. When you came back into his room, he was just walking out of the bathroom. "You sneaky bitch." He half smiled at you. 

"You knew it was coming. You stink, babe. You need to shower." You said, pulling out the wine and pouring you both a glass. "Come on." You walked him to his bathroom and started the shower, grabbing a few towels. 

"Y/n, I just want to lay down." He said, sitting on the counter and drinking the wine. 

"We'll lay down after you're clean. You're going to shower and then I need to clean your foot." You said, coming to stand between his knees. 

Resting his forehead against yours, he sighed. "I don't have any energy to do anything." 

"You have food and chocolate waiting for you." You replied, sitting his wine down and pulling him down off of the counter and pushing him into the shower fully clothed. 

"Oh, you bitch." Colby said, pulling you in with him. "That's what you get." 

Laughing, you were happy to see a smile on his face. "I'll take it. It got you in the shower." You said, pulling his shirt off of him and leaving him in basketball shorts. "Strip so you can actually get clean." 

Colby's whole demeanor changed, his arms half covering his torso. "I'm good. I'll shower. I promise." 

"Hey, what gives?" You asked, placing your hands on either side of his face and making him look at you.

"I just don't need another person judging me for how I look." he snapped, turning to face away from you.

"Was that what she told you? That she cheated on you because of how you look?" you asked, your blood boiling. When Colby didn't reply you knew you were right, so you decided to level the playing field. Stripping your shirt and bra off you chucked them on the bathroom floor. You ditched your jeans, just leaving you in your underwear. You slipped your hands around his sides, one coming to rest on his chest and the other across his stomach. "Colby, there's not a thing wrong with how you look."

"Fuck off." he said, sounding sad and not at all angry.

"Cole, when have I ever fucked off when you told me to?" you asked, pulling him against your chest. "You don't want to hear it, but sometimes you have the worst taste in women."

"Yeah." he said bitterly. "No shit." His arms finally relaxing instead of trying to cover himself.

With him relaxed against you, you grabbed his shower soap and started running your soapy hands across his torso and down his arms. "You know better than to believe anything that bitch says." Your hands crawling lower and starting to push down the waist band of his shorts.

"Doesn't mean it doesn't hurt." he replied, letting his boxers and his shorts fall wet to the shower floor. You kicked them out to join the rest of the sopping clothes. Turning Colby so his chest was leaning against yours, you started rubbing soapy circles into his back. "Y/n." he said softly, lifting his head.

"What?" you asked, still running your hands up and down Colby's back.

"I just..." he said, his hands coming to rest on your bare waist. "I didn't realize you had undressed is all." You shampooed and conditioned his hair and felt his arms start to tighten around you while he buried his face in your neck. While it felt wonderful, this wasn't how you wanted to take the step from friends to more.

"Think you can manage the rest while I switch over your linens?" you asked, not wanting it to seem like he had done anything wrong.

Colby cleared his throat "Yeah. Of course. Thank you." He replied, leaving a slow lingering kiss on your forehead and watching you make your way to the stack of towels.

Wrapping yourself in a towel, you gathered the wet clothes in another towel so you could throw them in the wash. "I'm going to borrow some of your clothes. Make sure you get dressed and meet me in the living room since your sheets won't be ready." you called, leaving the bathroom.

Dressed in some of Colby's sweats and one of his sweatshirts, you handled the laundry. You re-heated the Chipotle and filled both water and wine glasses for both of you. The couch was full of pillows and blankets and you had a small first aid kit out so you could clean up his foot. Seeing Colby come out dressed but limping on his injured foot, you pointed to the couch. "Sit down here so I can clean your foot up." 

Grabbing his glass of wine, he sat down on the couch, allowing you access to his foot. "Is this food for me?" He asked, his stomach growling.

"Eat up." you smiled at him.  "And there are two more bottles of wine, so don't hold back." You had pulled a few small pieces of glass out of his foot before he started getting fidgety. 

"That one really hurts." He said, hissing. 

"I'm sorry. Just. This. Last. One." You said, finally grabbing the last little sliver of glass out of his foot. "It should feel a bit better now." you said, wiping the slices with antiseptic and bandaging them up. "I'm going to go get you some socks so this doesn't catch on anything.

Walking back to his room, you made sure the bathroom was straightened again and that the towels made their way to the hamper. You grabbed some socks and headed back out. "I can do that." he said, when you knelt down next to the couch to put them on his feet.

"Oh, hush. Just give me your feet." you said, slipping the socks on.

"Aside from Sam, you're the only person that has ever seen my at my worst." he said, looking deep in thought.

"And now I've bathed you at your worst." you teased, trying to lighten the mood. Cracking a smile, he nodded. "What do you want to watch? Something bloody? Something funny?" you asked, throwing away the Chipotle trash and filling his wine glass. You grabbed your glass and joined him on the couch. 

"I want to watch Up, but I have a feeling you won't let me." he chuckled. 

"Damn straight. None of this Notebook sad type shit. Why don't we watch Hot Fuzz?" you suggested, scrolling through his digital movies on the tv.

"Only if you cuddle me." he said, grabbing one of the chocolates.

"That's a given, Cole-bear." You said, selecting the movie, and laying down on the couch, opening your arms so he could lay his head on your chest. You pulled blankets over the two of you and softly played with his still damp hair. You both continued to drink wine and eat chocolate while enjoying the movie and by the end of it, Colby was properly laughing along.

"Y/n." Colby said, watching the credits slowly pass.

"yeah?" you replied.

"I'm sorry if I got too handsy in the shower." he said, clearing his throat. "I didn't mean to take advantage of the situation."

"It's fine, Colby. I did get naked in your shower." you laughed.

After your response, he paused for a moment. "Why have we never dated?" he asked, like there was cute little clean-cut answer to that question. When you didn't answer him, he lifted his head from your chest to look at you. "Y/n?"

Pushing his hair out of his eyes, you replied in a slightly sad voice. "Colby, you've never asked."

His eyebrows knit together as he considered your answer. "If I had asked would you have said yes?"

"In a world where sober, not on the rebound Colby asked me out? Absolutely." you replied. He laid his head back down, closing his eyes and snuggling against your chest.

"I want to watch Up." he said, downing the last of his wine.

Not having a clue what was going through Colby's mind, you decided to just go with it. "No problem, babe." You selected the movie and resumed playing with his hair. You weren't 20 minutes into the movie before you were both sound asleep.

Being woken up by a banging noise, you sat up and realized Colby wasn't with you on the couch. "Cole?" you called out, wiping the sleep from your eyes and running your fingers through your hair. You noticed it was fully light outside meaning you slept through the night.

"In here." he replied, yelling from the kitchen.

"What are you doing?" you asked, walking into the kitchen and laying your head on his shoulder. 

"I'm making us food." he replied, his hand coming up to rest on your cheek.

"I'm supposed to be taking care of YOU." you said, trying to take the spatula from him.

"Uh, uh. Nope. You did take care of me, now grab those two glasses of orange juice and take them to my room." he said, continuing to cook breakfast. "I even made the bed and switched the laundry over."

Kissing him on the cheek, you couldn't help but smile. "I'm glad to see you up and about." you said, walking the glasses to his room. He had, in fact, made the bed. He had also brought the rest of the wine and chocolate in. You even saw your phone plugged into the charger on his bedside table.

Opening your phone, you saw that you had about a thousand twitter notifications. Closing them all out and opening the app, you saw why. Colby had taken a photo of you asleep on the couch. Hair wild across the pillow and around your face, your body bundled up in his sweatshirt. He had tweeted the photo saying, "I have the best friends in the world." You screenshot his tweet and then replied to the tweet with "You deserve the best friends in the world."

Colby walked in with two full plates of breakfast. "Put a movie on." he said, setting the plates on the bedside table and pulling the blanket back so you could crawl in.

"What has gotten into you?" you asked, laughing at how the roles had reversed.

He stopped what he was doing and stood by the bed. "You." he stared for a second before pointing over at the tv. "Pick something funny." He walked around the bed and crawled in. "The apartment office is sending someone over to fix the heat, so we may hear someone in the other room."

"Thank god. It's freezing in here." you replied, clicking on the movie Super Troopers and starting to eat. "This is delicious. Thank you."

"Breakfast is about the only meal I can cook." he laughed.

You two spent the day watching movies and being lazy. You postmated dinner since you had eaten breakfast so late. You finished off the rest of the wine and a better part of the chocolate. Colby didn't mention the break-up once. He didn't mention the shower again or that he had asked why you hadn't dated. He was just happy Colby. That night you both fell asleep on separate sides of the bed watching an episode of Stranger Things, but you woke up wrapped in Colby's arms. Wriggling out of his hold, you made your way to the living room. You straightened the apartment up and had just started looking at your breakfast options when Colby joined you. 

"You left me." he said, his arms circling you from behind. "Sam just landed. He wants us to meet him and Jake for breakfast in a bit." 

"I need to shower if I'm going out in public." you laughed, folding your arms over his. 

"I don't know. You smell quite nice to me." he said, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. 

"I smell like you." you laughed, breaking out of his hold. 

With a grin on his face, he tucked your hair behind your ear. "I know. I like it." he replied. "You can have first shower and I'll make coffee." he said, shooing you out of the kitchen. "Your clean clothes are folded on the bed." 

"You are in rare form today, Brock." You replied, walking to the bathroom to shower and get ready. Hearing the blow dryer, Colby knew you were finished in the shower, so he knocked. You opened the door, unplugging the blow dryer so you could take it to another room and let him shower. "Sorry, I'll go in the other room." 

"No need." He said, plugging it back in and pecking you on the cheek. "There isn’t another good mirror." He turned the shower on and started stripping. "Plus, it's not like you haven't seen all of this before." He said, striking a dumb pose in the mirror. 

You couldn't help but laugh. "You really are back to your old self."  

"Not exactly. I think I'm a better version of myself. I was stupid to spend my time and energy on shitty people when I have amazing people already in my life." He said, climbing in the shower. 

The change in Colby's attitude and mood had taken you by surprise. "Babe, you can't be philosophical with your dick hanging out." You said, starting the hair dryer up again. You could hear his laughter over the noise of the dryer.  

Finishing up your hair, you left the bathroom to find your make-up and to get dressed. Not long after you were both ready, Sam text Colby's phone telling you to meet them at a cafe down the street.

You got a table and ordered drinks waiting for the boys. When they showed up, Sam and Jake both kept eyeing Colby and he finally cleared the air. "Guys, I'm fine."  

"What are you talking about?" Jake asked, trying to act like he hadn't been worried about Colby.  

"Yes, I was cheated on and treated like shit. No, I don't give a shit what she tells people or posts online. Yes, I'm perfectly fine." He said, placing his hand over yours for a moment. "This one kicked my ass and made everything better." He teased.

"I saw your picture of her on the couch. I was happy she found a way into the apartment." Sam said.

"How did you get in?" Colby asked, considering it for the first time.  

"Jake." You laughed. "He told me where the spare was. I'm not giving it back, by the way."

"Keep it." Colby told you. "And thank you for telling her about it." He said to Jake.  

The rest of your meal was normal, but the boys definitely kept eyeing Colby. You were all shocked he was acting so normal. 

The following two weeks proved that Colby wasn't going to relapse into his blanket burrito phase which made you and the boys relax a bit. He had gone out drinking and dancing a few times with the rest of his buddies, but he never brought a girl home or went home with anyone. The nights he convinced you to come along, he stayed with you and danced with you and took you home where you would fall asleep watching whatever movie you guys picked.  

One day while you were at work scrolling through your phone on your lunch break you saw that Colby had tweeted out that he had a new video up. *"I can’t sing. We all know this. I guess some girls are just worth making a fool out of yourself for."* he wrote, with a link to the video.  

Closing your phone, you sighed and put it in your purse. You had accepted a long time ago that you were never going to be that girl. You weren't even upset about that. He was the best friend you could have asked for, but knowing that you were going to be second in line behind another girl again made you a bit sad.  

You stayed late in your office catching up on work and made your way home around 8:30 pm. You knew your phone had been going off, but all you wanted was to pour yourself a glass of wine and sit in your bathtub listening to music.  

Feeling sleepy and relaxed, you dried off and picked something in your kitchen to cook for a late night dinner. Setting everything up to cook you finally picked up your phone. More Twitter notifications than you could count. A load of Facebook requests. Tag notifications from more people than you actually knew. About 20 missed calls. You decided to ignore the social media and open your texts.  

Colby - "*The link to the video*"

Jake - "Did you watch Colby's new video?" 

Sam - "Omg, I soooo should have known."

Colby - "Y/n, are you okay?"

Colby - "Please just tell me you're okay? No one can get ahold of you."

Sam - "Colby is freaking out. You should come over."

Jake - "Do you not feel the same?"

Colby - "Too soon?"

Sam - "Colby is in his blanket burrito again. Please come over." 

"What the fuck is happening?" You said out loud in your empty apartment. Clicking on the link, you saw the video was of Sam playing guitar and helping Colby sing "Count On Me" by Bruno Mars. You watched the video, unable to keep a smile from forming on your face. You loved seeing Colby step out of his comfort zone. You had always enjoyed his voice even though he was insecure about it.

"You can count on me like 1 2 3

I'll be there

And I know when I need it

I can count on you like 4 3 2

And you'll be there

'Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeah"

Half way through the song you clicked open the description. You were looking for whatever reason Colby decided to finally sing in front of people.  

"This one has been a long time coming. I met a very pretty girl years and years ago. That girl grew up to be an incredibly kind, capable, and beautiful woman. She has helped me through every one of my hard times and has been there to kick my ass when I needed it. (Not joking. Just a few weeks ago she pushed me into the shower fully clothed. I almost died). I don't know why I never pursued her. I think it's because she's the kind of woman you marry, and I was too busy trying to make my dreams come true. I was being a bit of a fuckboy that wasn't ready to commit to a favorite drink, let alone a relationship. She's watched me surround myself with girls that treated me like absolute shit (not all of them were bad, but some of them were horrible) and she was always there to pick me up. It's about time I treated her like I should have been treating her all along. Y/n, you make me a better person. Even more, you make me WANT to be a better person. I would be honored if you let me call you mine." 

Turning off the stove, you threw on leggings, a baggy sweater, and shoes. You grabbed your bag and your keys and made your way, quick as you could, to Colby's apartment. You didn't even bother knocking, you just let yourself in. "Colby!" You called, running into the apartment.  

“Whoa, why did you ignore us?" Sam asked, getting up from Colby’s couch. “We’ve been trying to get ahold of you all day.”

"I didn't look at my phone. I was at the office until almost 9 and I saw he posted about a girl and I just wanted to be alone. I didn't know it was me." You said, out of breath and looking a mess.  

Sam smiled, realizing you hadn't actually hurt Colby. Standing aside, he clapped your shoulder. "Go get 'em." before leaving the apartment.

You ran into his room and felt along the wall for the light switch. "Colby?", you called, but didn't get a response. Turning the light on, you saw Colby. Rolled up in his damn blanket, fast asleep. Pulling out your phone, you snapped a picture and opened Twitter. You retweeted his tweet with the link and added "This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me." and then opened a new one. "I can't believe I get to call this adorkable burrito boy, mine." And added the picture.  

Setting your stuff down, you went into his bathroom and started the shower. Peppering his face with kisses, you woke Colby up. "Come on." You said, kissing him on the lips before walking into the bathroom.  

"Y/n?" Colby called behind you, obviously a little confused. You stripped out of your clothes and got into the shower, holding your hand out to him when he joined you in the bathroom. He stripped and hesitantly stepped into the shower.  

Like before, you lathered up your hands and ran them over his skin, a huge grin on your face. "Will you sing it?" You asked, pulling him to you, bare chest to bare chest and rubbing your hands across his back.  

A small smile formed on Colby's face as he started quietly singing, his voice scratchy from being woken up. "If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea, I'll sail the world to find you." His hands found their place on your waist and you tucked your face into his neck. "If you ever find yourself lost in the dark and you can't see, I'll be the light to guide you." He continued on, the two of you swaying back and forth under the warm water.  

"I thought you rejected me." He said, slipping his arms around you and pulling you against him. 

"Not at all. I didn't even watch your video until I got home from work and saw my phone blown up with texts." You said leaning back to look at his face.  

"I'm an idiot for not realizing I had already found you. I've spent the last few weeks trying to prove that you weren't a rebound." He laughed.  

"You don't need to prove anything to me, Colby. Even if your video was about someone else, I would have been here taking care of you when you needed me to." you said, leaning up to kiss him.  

"Mmmmm, I'm so glad I get to do this now." He said, deepening the kiss.  

"Me too." You replied, your hands coming up to sit on either side of his face. "I may or may not have posted a picture of you in your burrito."  

"Oh, God." He laughed. "It's okay, I'll get you back. I'm great at posting unflattering photos of the people I love."  

You couldn't help but smile at that. "Oh, I know what I signed up for. I'm also pretty sure you just said you loved me." 

"And I'm pretty sure you should know that by now." He said, resting his forehead against yours.  

"You ready for bed, babe?" You asked, rinsing the soap from you both.  

"Only if you stay. I've been an anxious wreck all day and I'm exhausted, but I don't want to go to bed without you." He said, pressing a kiss to your lips. 

"Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere." You replied, turning off the water and pulling him out of the shower.  

Colby looked you up and down as you dried off, making your cheeks go pink. You went to throw your leggings back on for bed, but Colby stopped you. "Come on, blushing beauty." He pulled you into the bedroom, shut the lights off, and climbed into bed without redressing. He opened his arms and waited for you to join him.  

Climbing in and laying against his chest, you felt him tuck the blanket around the two of you. "I could definitely get used to this." You said, closing your eyes and slowly running your fingers up and down his side.  

"I think I'm already past used to it. I don't think I could live without it." He said, kissing the top of your head and trailing his fingers in designs on your back.  

"Sing it one more time?" You asked, knowing it was the cheesiest thing you could do.  

You could feel Colby's chuckle in his chest. "Of course, love." He said, starting the song over. You never thought you'd be the girl Colby sang to sleep, but his voice was the last thing you heard before you gave in and fell asleep, the rythym of his voice and the rise and fall of his chest serenading you into slumber.

[queen-scribbles]

Good to be Back

Oh, look. Callie started talking. Because I’ve never had over-eager muses before. :P Just a little something about her favorite hobby until I’m more familiar with the lore ;)

---

Normally coming home was a relief. The promise of quiet after one of their missions, having time for the adrenaline to fade and her heart rate settle back to normal was a good thing. But today Callie couldn’t stop pacing.

And there was no outlet around the house for all her lingering nervous energy; they hadn’t been gone long enough for anything to need fixing. She bit her lip and looked at Delia. Her sister was asleep on the couch, half covered in a woven dusky rose throw blanket, with Charlie sprawled protectively on the floor in front of her. If history was any indicator, Delia wouldn’t move a muscle for at least four hours, forget waking up.

Callie looked down to catch Charlie’s eye. “You gonna watch her for me?”

The answering “wuff” sounded like it came from under the couch--or maybe out in the kitchen? But it was good enough.

“Great.”Callie darted upstairs to change, stuck a note--”Bouldering :)”--to the blanket over Delia’s chest with masking tape when she came down, and was out the door with one final “Good boy” nod to Charlie. Time for the one thing that could reliably clear her head.

---

It wasn’t far to her favorite spot, a handful of knobby boulders that ranged from nine to fifteen feet tall and back again, some jutting relatively straight up, others tilted at varying angles. Some days there were other climbers, solo or in pairs, but it looked like she was truly solo today.

Delia’ll kill me if she finds out I did this alone alone, Callie thought with a wry smile. Even though I know this one like the back of my hand.

She eyed her usual target out of the bunch, a wide, sloping, moderately difficult specimen nicknamed Widow’s Peak--more for its resemblance to the hairline than any particular danger in climbing it. There were no obvious changes to the familiar ridges and crevices that pocked the surface, and she really did know this one well enough she could probably climb it blindfolded(she wouldn’t, not alone, but she could).

Callie cracked her knuckles, stretched a bit, and started up. All her jittery abundance of energy instantly swung into focus on finding her next grip, another toehold, moving up the rock face with practiced speed. Just because she knew it well was no excuse to get sloppy. It’s good to be back.

One foot slipped from its perch halfway up, the split second shock all it took for her other foot to dislodge as well. Callie looked at the crash pad six feet below, grit her teeth, and curled her legs back in. Her left foot found purchase easily, her right scrabbled for a minute before landing on a small protrusion.

Same place every damn time, Callie groused silently, then huffed hair out of her eyes and continued climbing.

It didn’t take long to complete the well-versed climb and mantle up over the edge. She plunked down on the bumpy rock with a triumphant grin and braced her feet against a large ridge in the boulder’s surface as she took in the view while catching her breath.

Same gorgeous trees, same quaint houses, same barely visible shadow of city life on the horizon. It never really changed, and she was settled by the familiarity of it. The breeze picked up, chillier than down below, and a shiver crawled up her spine. Looked like t-shirt instead of tank top had been a good call. Goosebumps still prickled her forearms, but it wasn’t unbearable. She ran her fingers through her hair to comb it back from her face and exhaled a slow breath.

It had been a real close call this time, circumventing what Delia Saw. Not as close as some, but probably in their top five. Top ten, for sure. It really wasn’t any wonder Delia had passed out from exhaustion on the couch--at least she made it as far as the couch. But they’d done it, and the dryad from Delia’s vision was still alive and well(even if her tree was down a smaller branch or two).

“All’s well that ends well,” Callie muttered to a passing bird, flicking a pebble off the edge with the toe of her show. That was what to focus on. Not the getting lost in an apple orchard or rabid werewolf or skin-of-their-teeth rescue; the happy ending  She was still allowed to need a decompression climb with a success.

“Here’s hoping the next one involves a little less mortal peril, all the same,” she sighed into the growing breeze, followed by a soft snort at the low odds her request would be granted. She knew how this life went.

The breeze gusted strong enough to pull at her clothes and Callie shivered as she held her hair back. Probably a good idea to climb down now...

Or... she countered the little voice, glancing at the next boulder in line; a two foot gap she’d have to jump and then three more feet she could go up before making her way down.

That sounded more fun. So that’s what she did. She didn’t mantle at the top, just smacked a hand over the edge to count as ‘done’ to herself, then started down. This boulder was a less familiar climb, which took longer and called for more concentration, but that was a good thing. Distraction was one of the reasons she was out here, after all. Burning up leftover adrenaline. And there were few better ways to do that than bouldering down a semi-familiar rock she hadn’t gone up in a couple months. She banged her knee twice--skinned it the second time, she could tell--and almost lost her grip once just high enough to be a problem.

It definitely did the trick. By the time she dropped the last couple feet to the crash pad, Callie was free of any adrenaline let-down jitters and had replaced them with a deep sense of contentment that seemed to curl around her bones as it settled.

Almost as good as sex, she smirked, giving the rock an affectionate pat before she walked away.

---

She stopped at The Kettle on the way home, bought a white mocha to top off the good climb. After a moment’s hesitation, she added an apple tea for Delia. Even if she was still asleep when Callie got home, she could reheat it. It wouldn’t be as good, but hopefully could still minimize any concerned scolding headed Callie’s way for her choice of stress release activity.

Delia was indeed still asleep when she got home. Callie smiled as she set her sister’s drink on one of the end tables that flanked the couch. Between Delia’s Rip van Winkle impersonation and her own insomnia after the finished a job, looked like the Cole girls were headed for another round of ‘What’s a Normal Sleep Cycle? Bingo. Joy.

Nothing to be done about it now. The month’s worth of mail Azalea had been nice enough to neatly pile on the dining room table, however, she could do something about. Taking a sip of her coffee, Callie settled in to start sorting junk mail from the important stuff.

It was the little things that really made it good to be back.

[captainbetonit]

Room for more(chapter four)

~.~ 

They had stopped for lunch at a place Zane was sure they’d like, Skylor’s noodles. 

Skylor was their long time friend, who also was married to their friend/Social worker Pixel but hey, who was counting? 

Parking in front of the restaurant Zane knew he’d make the right choice. Down to the fact that Nya was trying to undo her car seat.

“I see you like this place.” Zane laughed as he unlocked the doors. The moment he opened the door Kai ran out with Nya in his arms, a good thing he had kept the child locks on. 

“Momma and Pappa used to take us all the time!” Nya exclaims as Zane picks her up and has Kai hold his hand. 

“Did they now?” Zane asks as they walk through the parking lot and inside the building. Once inside Kai tried to run again, but Zane wouldn’t let him. 

The family was seated at a booth and were given menus within five minutes. Zane had been there many times, he knew Cole came here sometimes for his lunch break, but this was the first time he’d bring his children. Temporary children? No that makes it sound like they weren’t people. 

“Hey there Zane, great to see you again.” The waiter grabbed at Zane’s attention, he realized he was spacing out. 

“Oh hey Griffin,I forgot you worked here.” Zane smiled politely and turned to his friend. 

Griffin shrugged and fixed his red tinted sunglasses, “It’s mostly part time now, might change to full time till fall.” 

“Really? Would Skylor let you do that?” Zane asks as he sets the menu down in front of him. 

“She gets what I need to do, that and i’ve been here since she got the place.” Griffin smirked before he pulled out a pad of paper and a pen. “Anyways, the usual right?” 

“Kai, Nya? Are you ready?” If his friend didn’t notice the two little kids when he came over he definitely did now. 

It was unusual for the fast man to be silent, but he remained like that as the little girl pointed to what she wanted while her brother(?) muttered it. 

“Griffin?” Zane asks, as the man was in a way shocked out of his stupor. 

“Yes, uh yeah i got it don’t worry.” He wrote down the order before pocketing his pad and pen, “I’ll be right back with your drinks.” Griffin quickly left, most likely to tell his boss/friends in the back.(He’d forget the drinks till last minute.) 

“Who was that guy?” Kai asks, watching the man practically run to the back. 

“He’s a friend of ours, he’s nice once you get to know him.” Zane stated as he spotted Skylor a table away talking to someone. 

“Why was he wearing sunglasses indoors?” Nya asks, scribbling away on the kids menu. 

“We don’t know, he’s like that.” Zane explained, taking out some wet wipes from some of the little dishes placed in the middle of the table. “Wipe your hands please.” He handed one to Kai and another to Nya. 

“Well if it isn’t one half of a whole mess!” Skylor exclaims as she slaps him on the shoulder. 

“I could say the same for you.” Zane deadpans as Skylor unceremoniously drops herself across from him. 

“Don’t be like that, you love me.” She grins before her attention is caught by Kai and Nya, both of whom were staring at her with wide eyes. “Who are these little ones?” 

“Skylor this is Kai and Nya.” Zane says confidently, it was the first real time he could call them his kids, right? “Cole and I are fostering them, kids this is Skylor.” 

Skylor, who looked smitten the moment she laid eyes on the two, gave a motherly smile and waved. “Hi, it’s so nice to meet you.” 

Suddenly Nya brightens up, stars in her eyes, “You're the lady from the picture!” she exclaimed. 

“Mrs.Borg is your wife!” Kai chimed in, looking pleased that he remembered. 

Skylor was shocked for all of two seconds before she started laughing. “I haven’t met them and they already know me!” She threw her head back as she cackled. 

“Well we do have quite a few photos from your wedding Skylor.” Zane chuckled as his friend started to calm down. 

“Did you guys order already? Where are your drinks?” Skylor had finally calmed down and took a moment to look at their table, there were no plates or glasses, just some unopened chopsticks alongside some forks and spoons. 

“Griffin came by, he looked spaced out however.” Zane said as Kai and Nya started to whisper to each other. 

“Yeah, he gets like that around winter.” Skylor leaned back into her seat, she started thinking about it. “I think it’s because its almost winter, after that he can’t really function.” 

“How come?” Kai asks as Nya leans on him. 

“He always has to move,you know? He’s like a shark with bad sunglasses.” Skylor explains, giving Zane a look at the last part. 

“Hey dude, sorry for the wait.” Griffin finally came back, a tray expertly balanced in his hand. 

“Griffin, we aren’t even packed. Why did it take so long?” It was like Skylor did a complete 180, giving her employee an icy glare. 

“Sorry Skylor, one of the waitresses needed me.” Griffin handed the family their drinks, “It wasn’t that long though.” 

“It’s long when there’s nobody here, Turner.” Skylor stood, and while she didn’t tower over him she was intimidating and angry. 

“I-it won’t happen again, i’m sorry Skylor.” Griffin held the tray close to him, scared that he could lose this job.

In response Skylor’s demeanor changed like she wasn’t mad in the first place. “I’m kidding Griffin. Don’t worry about it.” 

Giffin, somewhat relieved, started laughing as well. “Wait really?” 

“Of course, hey did you meet Zane’s kids?” Skylor took the tray from Griffin and sat him next to her. 

The two looked at Griffin, Nya with wide eyes while Kai glared at him. “Hey little dudes, i bet these two talked about me?” He leaned forward and gave a charming pose. 

“Fast and distracted.” The two stated in unison and nodding. 

Two of the adults gave an unflattering snort of a laugh as Griffin’s face fell. “Wow, i haven’t met them and already i’ve been tarnished.” 

“Serves you right,” Skylor muttered, as she stole some of Zane’s water. “Remember when we met Karlof’s niece? You said i was a witch who bribed people with noodles.” 

“I was joking, you’re not a noodle witch.” Griffin smiled, “More like a demon.” 

“I will hit you.” Skylor whacked the back of his head, causing his red tinted glasses to fall. 

The glasses landed in front of Kai, who looked intrigued by them. “Why do you wear these indoors?” He asks, picking them up. 

“That’s a good question, and in all honesty I don’t know.” Griffin laughed as he took them back. “I wore them a lot in college and I never stopped.” 

“So you're trying to relive the glory days?” Nya asks sweetly, now holding her cup with two hands. 

Griffin let his glasses clatter as Skylor cackled and Zane shook with silent laughter. 

“N-Nya, sweetie.” Zane took a deep breath, “Nya you can’t just say things like that.” 

“Why?” She asks, placing her cup down. 

“Because Griffin still thinks he’s young.” Skylor stated as her friend gave a squawk of indignes. 

“Excuse you, i am young.” He stated as his friends rolled their eyes. “What, i am!” 

“Griffin you have back pain.” Skylor deadpanned, “You’re 28.” 

“Well he does carry his whole team on his back.” Zane remarked, only somewhat sarcastically. 

As the adults talked and Nya listened with attention, Kai grew very bored. He was hungry, and Griffin only brought their drinks. 

Could he say something though? It was nice of Zane to bring them to the noodle house, but he was talking to his friends. He shouldn’t be bothered. 

Zane noticed something was up with Kai however, the way he kept looking near the kitchen, how he looked like he wanted to say something. 

Realization hit the man, that’s the whole reason they came here was for lunch. 

“Hey Griffin,” Zane interrupted his friend's story, “When can we get our food?” 

Skylor gave Griffin a glare as he tensed up. “We’ve been here for ten minutes and you didn’t bring their food? Really?” 

“Oh, that’s what I forgot.” Griffin hissed, before standing and grabbing his tray. “I’m so sorry, I’ll be back in a second with your food.” He quickly left to the back. 

Skylor sighed, “I’m sorry about the wait guys, I’ll let you get to your meal.” 

When she left Griffin came back, balancing a tray filled with hot food. “Alright, here is your order and call me if you need anything.” He set the meals in front of their respective person and left to tend to some other paterons. 

As the family dug into their meal Kai had a thought tugging the back of his mind. Zane only said that because he was hungry, right? Most adults do stuff like that because they need it, right? 

“Kai? Are you ok?” Zane’s voice jolted Kai out of his thoughts. 

He looked up at his foster father, at the genuine concern that stared back. 

“I’m fine.” He grumbles, it was a trick. No one really cared, not about him anyways. 

“Kai, look at me please.” Zane had put down his utensils and turned his body to face the boy. 

Begrudgingly Kai faces him, it didn’t matter. 

“What?” 

Zane placed a hand on Kai’s shoulder, “Kai, can you please tell me what’s wrong?” 

“Nothings wrong.” 

“Something’s bothering you, and you can tell me.” He gave the boy such a genuine smile that it couldn’t have been anything but true. 

However the boy stayed silent, it was such a bad place to say anything; mostly because the restaurant started to fill with people. 

Zane must have had the same thought, and sighed. “We can talk about this when you're ready, take you time.” 

He stayed silent for another minute, “Can we talk about at home maybe?” 

Giving a small smile Zane nodded, “Of course we can.” And they went back to their meal. 

Zane didn’t ask for himself, he asked because he saw Kai. Zane wasn’t like the other adults, maybe that’s a good thing. 

[scribeofmorpheus]

Chasing Tornadoes {3/6}

Pairing: Stephen Strange x Reader

Series Warnings: poorly written medical procedural, mild delving into spirituality, language, overbearing egos, graphic descriptions of medical procedures. more warnings to be added. 18+ Generally, like my blog.

A/N: suprisingly, very little to warn about. blood splatter?

Series Masterlist | Masterlist | AO3

Taglist is open -comment or send an ask!

<< Previously ○ Next >>

~

“God, you’re insufferable!” You slammed your clipboard into Stephen’s chest, it was surprisingly firm in a subtle way. You swallowed.

Stephen grabbed your wrist, not tightly, but firm enough to lock you in his grasp. He tugged, you moved forward against your wishes.

“And you’re so goddamn stubborn,” he whispered.

You shook your head, “I can’t believe you went around my back and interfered with my patient! That wasn’t your call. If I wanted your help, I’d ask for it!”

Stephen inched you towards the wall, back pressed to the familiar hospital walls. “You and I both know, I was the more qualified to handle this one.”

Why is he being so blasé about all this? Your breath hitched when he moved in a little closer. Why is he so close?

“Steph—”

He cut you off, lips prompting a rise in euphoria as soon as they met yours. They were soft, supple. But there was a boldness beneath it. You whimpered, finding it strikingly good. Deliciously good. And then while your head spun and Stephen stole your breaths, your surroundings changed to the familiar navy blue of the OR.

You gasped and pushed Stephen softly, “How did we…?”

Stephen followed your gaze.

A group of surgeons, masked up and gloved up, were performing surgery on a banana. You stuttered, at a loss for words. Stephen shrugged, unphased and then moved his attention back to you. Lips a mere millimetre away.

You recoiled, “Stephen.”

“What?” He asked, somewhat disappointed.

You pointed your ring finger at the operating table, “The banana.”

“Oh, right,” He turned. “How’s our patient?”

A beeping noise sounded out. A fellow spoke: “He’s going into cardiac arrest.” The beeping stopped. “He’s gone.”

“I’m calling it, time of death—”

You were shaken from your sleep by the sudden reorientation. With a loud thud, you landed hard on your ass, the sheets tangling one foot.

You rubbed your eyes, vision coming back blurry and spotted, “What the hell kind of dream was that?” Your fingers trailed over your lips. Dry and chapped and sorely missing the softness of the dream. You groaned, in no mood to deal with some romance drama in the workplace.

You were roused from the floor by the sound of something breaking. With heavy eye-lids and noodle arms, you hoisted yourself up and walked towards the kitchen, the source of the sound.

Rich loam soil and four fragmented pieces of a flower pot lay scattered on the floor. A small root system was peeking out from under the stove; it belonged to a cactus. The last cactus you owned.

You groaned as your eyes trailed up to the former resting place of the now destroyed flower pot and saw Spike’s fat reptilian body trying to slink away.

“Oh no you don’t, you leathery cat,” you hopped over the mess on the floor and grabbed Spike. You held him close to your face so you could stare into his eyes. “What is it with you and cactuses?”

Spikes tongue slithered out then in again before he let out a whiny growl.

You rolled your eyes and scolded him, “If you keep this up I’ll put you up for adoption.” You clicked your tongue in annoyance as you opened up the balcony door and let Spike down next to the arbour. “You stay out here and think about what you’ve done while I make breakfast.”

Spike made another lazy growl before moving away from the door at a snail’s pace. You hastily swept up the soil from your wooden floors and set aside the broken ceramic pieces in case you wanted to use them for another DIY home decor project.

While you put together a fruit bowl for breakfast, you noticed you hadn’t checked your voicemail. As you squeezed out the last two drops of honey onto your breakfast, you listened absentmindedly to the voice messages while making a mental checklist.

“Hey, Y/N…” Teddy’s soft voice reminded you of a lounge singer who smoked too many cigarettes in between sets. The kind of swaggerful baritone that belonged to men like Frank Sinatra or Nat King Cole. Ironically, Teddy’s face matched the softness of his name more than it did his pitch in voice. “I sent a few messages but I suppose you were on shift. That tornado…messy stuff. My cousin is local fire department, she told me—”

Remember to pay Mr Eliopoulos for the takeout. Teddy’s voice dissolved into white noise as you chewed your food. Get some bills out the ATM to keep on hand.

The next message played after a beep and you weren’t the slightest bit sorry you didn’t fully catch the rest of Teddy’s message.

“Y/N, it’s Irene.” –You froze. For a second– “I don’t know if you deleted my number after the last time we talked or not so…Yeah. It’s Irene,” your sister’s voice was a startling surprise to hear. She sounded as lively as a doornail, probably all the hours spent banging her head instead of her gavel in the courtroom. Irene thrived in the city, even if she never looked fully awake in any of her social media posts. You didn’t care much for city life and its exhausting churn.

Remember to save Irene’s number. Again.

“Mum called me, frantic that you didn’t call or text to say you were okay. She watched the news. The tornado rattled her. Your phone was off the whole day. I had to clear a whole day’s worth of meetings because her angina was acting up.” Irene was rambling in her monotone.

Angina isn’t a disease.

Irene paused as if she’d heard what you’d thought. Then she took a breath. You could practically picture her working her jaw muscles as she fought the urge to get emotional. “Call mum.”

Call mum.

The distance between you and Irene wasn’t consolidated to the miles between your cities. Irene was prickly, like a cactus. Maybe that’s why you had so much trouble growing them. But she was also the only person on the I-95 highway who stopped to pick up a wounded iguana on her cross-country trip that winter you moved into your apartment. That iguana was Spike. That was also the first and last time Irene ever stepped foot in your apartment. And the second time you’d deleted her phone number.

“Or at the very least, post one of those disturbing pictures of Spike dressed in baby clothes,” Irene’s tone turned condescending. There was some chatted on her end of the line. “I’m needed in the chamber.”

No rush saving her number. You swallowed the last spoonful of food before dumping your bowl in the sink. Then you opened the balcony door to let Spike back in.

A third beep. Another message.

“Dr Y/N?” the voice on the other end of the line was now very familiar to you. For a second, you wondered if you were still dreaming. “Dr Stephen Strange. The relief. I got your number from the on-call sheet. Just letting you know I got the go ahead first thing this morning to prep for the transplant. I’ll be the chief surgeon on staff. Marcy is in the best hands. Literally. I’ll see you at work.”

Ask about the transplant. You head shot up so fast you were convinced it’d crack like an Indiana Jones style bullwhip. Transplant?

“Marcy…” you mumbled before rushing to get to the shower. Just then another message played. The last. On it, Mike told you he was on his way to pick you up and that you should do something, but you weren’t paying much attention at that point. You had less than five minutes before he arrived.

Your shower was cold and quick. About half-way through, you realised the conditioner was practically empty. No time to fully detangle your bed-head knots, you raked your fingers through and washed all the shampoo away, making sure to add a little styling crème so your hair wouldn’t look like frizzy from the summer humidity.

You made sure to grab your go-bag, keys and lock the balcony door before rushing out the door just as Mike pulled into the driveway.

Mike had dark circles under his eyes, wind tousled hair that was still damp in places and an outstretched hand dangling out the car window with a coffee flask waiting expectantly.

You grabbed it and hastily made your way to the passenger side.

“Thanks,” you said out of breath as you unscrewed the cap and took a swig. Mike looked at you with a perplexed expression. When no coffee touched your tongue it was your turn to look back at Mike with a similar expression. “It’s empty.”

Mike nodded, “I know it’s empty.”

“Why’d you give me an empty flask?”

“Because you were supposed to make the coffee.

“Then you should have told me to.”

“I did.”

“You didn’t.”

Mike stared at you with a knowing look for a second too long. He sighed, rubbing his red eyes, “You didn’t listen to the whole voice message did you?”

You opened your mouth to retort but then you realised Mike was right. You clicked your tongue, “We can stop by the café near the intersection.”

“You’re buying,” Mike put the car in drive while you tried your best to distract yourself from thinking about Marcy.

“Tell me something new.”

 You got dressed into the maroon scrubs in the locker room. Your lanyard feeling particularly heavy that day. Maybe you weren’t as ready for today as you thought you were.

You had hoped and prayed to whatever constituted as a god on any particular day that Marcy would get a new lung. A healthy lung. And that she’d finally get to experience her youth, but now your hands wouldn’t stop shaking and your heart was so loud you wanted to scream just to shut it up.

But today was here and you only had the one heart, so you made a fist, took a long, deep breath and ran towards the OR.

Bach in C minor was playing over the sound of the heart-lung machine. There had been a slight pause when you walked into the OR mid-surgery, but everything continued without fail.

You knew, logically, that observing from the theatre was the right thing to do. The impartial thing to do. But this wasn’t any patient. This was Marcy. The girl you helped with her science homework that one weekend she came in for a check-up and stayed for a minor surgical procedure. The girl you watched rerun’s on cable TV with when you had the night shift. The girl you watched grow up.

Doctor Weisz was among the medical staff in the room. Strange didn’t bother looking away from Marcy’s open chest cavity.

“I don’t remember calling for a second pair of hands,” Strange said as if he was talking to himself. “Did you Doctor?”

Doctor Weisz’s words came out muffled behind her mask, “No.” She kept an impressive straight face. Come to think of it, you had never seen her smile. Or get angry. She was always professional. Even her haircut was a choice of convenience; short and slicked back.

You stepped out from behind Strange’s frame and moved in closer to Marcy. It was a little unsettling how normal she looked in a hospital gown with the elastic of her breathing mask drawing two red lines across her cheeks. The open chest cavity was different though. Unsightly.

Your fingers trembled, reaching out to hold her open palm lying flat on the table when the sudden loud beeping of the heart rate monitor shook you to action.

A squirt of blood sprayed out, turning the sterile blue operating gowns dark with plasma.

 “She’s bleeding,” Strange noted as if reading a catalogue. “There’s too much scar tissue.”

“BP is dropping. Fast,” Mike said. You hadn’t even noticed him in the room.

“Clamps,” Doctor Weisz’s hand was stretched expectantly to the fellow behind her.

Your feet were glued in place, like a statue with open eyes that couldn’t look away, just watching. Your brain yelled at you to snap out of it, let your training take over, set your emotions to backburner. But none of it worked.

“Someone get her out of my OR!” Strange’s composure shifted for the first time. It was then that you noticed your hand was holding tightly onto Marcy’s.

Just as Strange instructed, someone grabbed your hand and pulled towards the doors. Once you were out in the bright hallway you realised it was Mike.

 In the last couple of hours, you had treated a kid with tonsillitis, a man with a hangnail and one skateboarder with a concussion.

Why’d today have to be a slow day?

You sighed as you flipped through a medical chart Arlene had handed over for a second pair of eyes to go over.

“You said she came in with a fever?”

Arlene stammered before straightening her spine, “Y-yes.”

You kept quiet for a few seconds, waiting for Arlene to jump on cue and finish telling you the symptoms. She didn’t.

“Arlene?”

“Yes?” She looked up, big eyes fully attentive. Her innocence was endearing, but if not grown out of, it’d be a hindrance in this profession.

“This is usually when you fill me in.”

“Oh, right,” she fumbled with her chart. “Uh…loss of appetite, abdominal cramps and joint paint.”

“What’s your diagnosis?” You looked up at the wall clock, watching the hands tick.

Arlene fidgeted, “M-my diagnosis? I um…” She wiped her forehead as if there was sweat on it. “Cramps, fever and joint pain could be…stomach flu?”

“Viral gastroenteritis, yes,” you agreed with her diagnosis. “Treatment?”

Arlene was getting more confident, “Rehydration Solution, anti-viral—”

“Good, do it,” You excused yourself when you spotted Mike walking down the hall. The surgery was done.

“Mike!” You caught his attention. “So…how’d it go?”

Mike tried to miss eye contact, “She’s stable. Transplant wrapped up okay.”

“Something’s wrong, isn’t it?”

“No, no, nothing like that,” Mike rushed to place his hands on your elbows. “Marcy’s fine, taking well to the lung. She’s on assisted breathing until the rupture heals and the pressure is relieved on her muscles. She will have to stay in Recovery for longer but she’ll pull through.”

You laughed, a bright smile beaming over your face, “Then what’s the issue?”

Mike bit his lip, “Strange recommended to Weisz that you be put on probation for the time being.

Anger rushed unexpectedly, “What?”

Stephen suddenly appeared down the hallway. You marched over to him. He looked at you, expecting your oncoming aggression.

“You recommended I be put on probation?” You folded your arms to seem imposing.

Stephen glanced knowingly at Mike. Mike shrugged before disappearing into the lounge.

“God, you’re insufferable!” You flashed back to your dream and now you were confused as to what exactly you should be feeling.

“And if today is any indication, you’re too emotional,” he said softly.

You baulked, feeling insulted, “Too emotional?”

He rubbed his neck, “I told you about the operation out of professional courtesy. You had no right to barge into my OR and distract from the procedure. You put a bad foot forward, unprofessional. Weisz agreed. I suggested temporary probation to prevent Weisz from dealing a worse blow.”

You scoffed, “So you were helping me, is that it?”

“Yes,” he sounded on edge. “You’re too raw to be working right now. If I was your superior, I wouldn’t be assured that you could competently manage the rigorous expectations of the workplace.”

“Unbelievable, you really do walk around thinking you know everything, that your word is final. Mike was right, you have no reason to overstep your boundaries. You’re the relief, not my boss,” You threw your arms up in the air, ignoring the other residents listening in.

Stephen sighed, pushing passed you, ending the argument prematurely.¨

“Where are you going?” You demanded, following in stride.

“To get a drink,” he pressed his eyelids. “If you insist on still handing me my ass, you are welcome to join.”

You stalled for a second then decided to continue your squabble.

To be continued...

[embeanwrites]

Finding Home Gavin Reed x Reader

Chapter 12

Masterlist

A/N: One of my editors is in love with Kamski, so she took the lead with this one! Before she added to the chapter it was about three pages shorter haha Follow her @kakyoweenie

I woke up Saturday morning around 10 to a phone call. I didn’t even bother checking who it was before answering.

“Hello?”

“Did I wake you up?” It was Tina. I yawned.

“Yeah, but I needed to get up soon anyway. I’m hanging out with a friend from grad school in a couple hours. What’s up?”

“I just wanted to check up on you. I tried texting you last night to make sure you were okay…was it really that bad?” I chuckled.

“No, it was really fun which was the worst part. Whenever my work or Cyberlife comes up he just shuts down and acts like an ass. I can’t be around someone who doesn’t even understand why I do what I do.”

“That makes sense.” Tina said softly.

“Tina, I’m not a baby, I’m going to be alright. It’s just Gavin, it’s not like he’s the only man in Detroit.”

“That’s true.” She sighed. “I’m sorry I kinda tried to force you guys together. You guys are really different, but there’s something about both of you that I thought would work really well together.”

“Yeah, it’s alright. On the bright side I’m looking forward to tomorrow! Do you want me to wear a suit or a dress to the wedding?”

“Both me and Valerie are letting our best people decide what they want to wear! Our colors are blush pink and light yellow.”

“Alright I’ll think about it and get back to you, but right now I have to get ready for this meeting. I’ll see you tomorrow!” We said bye and I sighed. I stretched and went to my closet.

I still felt angry from the night before. Gavin’s words echoed in my mind; “Why don’t you ask Eli in between him trying to impress you?” If he wanted to play that way, then fine we would play that way.

I stepped out of the automatic taxi in a spaghetti strap summer dress that stopped right before my knees and a pair of gladiator sandals. Eli's house was striking, dark smooth metal reflected the stunningly kept grounds and the floor to ceiling windows sparkled in the sunlight. I walked up the pathway leading to the front door, running my hands over the railing that followed the path, enjoying the lake breeze that washed away the intense summer heat till I got to the door, pressing the bell, and fussing with my phone and purse till a Chloe android opened the door and caught me by surprise, hand still buried in my purse.

“Dr. (L/n), Elijah’s waiting for you in the media room, please follow me.” She turned around and started walking. I followed her down a long hallway that opened into a multitude of rooms, all beautifully decorated, if not a bit coldly. The house didn't feel very cozy or appear to be lived in at all, the perfect modernist home with all its amenities but devoid of all the family photos, the dings on the wall and the frumpy old chairs you'd had since your first apartment. It was lonely, I concluded, as Chloe finally stopped at one of the rooms, where Eli was sprawled on a couch facing away from us, but as Chloe opened the tinted glass door, he turned and grinned at me.

"(Y/n)!" Eli greeted me opening his arms up in welcome as he got up from the couch, moving to meet me halfway into the room. He looked good, tired, his hair in a messy little bun, dark smudges under his eyes, but relaxed in a soft looking black v-neck, and a comfortable looking pair of black joggers. I laughed as I walked into his arms, hugging him tightly, and screeching when he lifted me and twirled me around before setting me back down.

"How many times have I told you not to do that Eli!" I said, still chuckling a bit, as he guided me towards the couch he was just sitting on.

"Hmm, it's been too long I can't recall." He said, stroking his chin mockingly and winking at me before that toothy grin returned. I shoved his shoulder lightly

"You best not be putting all the blame on me Mister Hot-Shot C.E.O!" I joked, as I sat down next to him.

"Oh I would never, but I do remember a certain doctoral candidate choosing a university as far away from Detroit as she could get.” Elijah said pointedly. I huffed a laugh at him, not really knowing what to say. “What are you watching?” I asked, pointing to the TV.

“Ah, President Warren is giving an update on android laws.” He scoffed, his face contorting into a sneer for a moment, before relaxing into an expression of mild displeasure.

“Anything I need to worry about?” I mused after a moment, Elijah didn’t hide his distaste for the president well.

He barked out a laugh, “No, she’s said nothing of value, but when does she? It’s interesting that they keep stalling, you’d think they’d be eager to put in place some sort of laws.” I nodded in agreement. He turned the tv off and turned on the sofa to face me, settling his arm over the back of the couch and leaning in towards me. “But I didn’t invite you over to talk about politics or android laws.”

“Yes, I believe I was invited over because you have a pool?” We both laughed. Eli was still very close, staring intently at me, his cerulean eyes moving all over my face, finally stopping at my eyes. He didn’t break eye contact as he lifted a hand and slowly brushed a stray piece of hair behind my ear. I smiled softly, looking up at him through my lashes and murmuring a soft ‘thank you.’

This was bordering on too much, I felt guilty leading him on, I needed to get this visit back on track, to ask about Gavin, but I had to be careful, I didn’t want Elijah to react the same way Gavin had last night. I pulled away from Eli, moving to a more reasonable distance. His face dropped for a second, but he quickly remedied that, a cool smirk resting easy on his features. I worried my lip between my teeth for a moment, trying to think how to start this conversation.

“You know Elijah, for as long as we’ve known each other, I really don’t know much about you.” I said, quirking my lips in a smirk mirroring his.

“Ah but you know all the interesting bits (Y/n).” He said, quirking a brow, and folding his arms over his chest loosely, a defensive but not totally unapproachable position.

I sighed, already regretting what I was about to do, and reached my hands out to grab his, capturing one of his hands between the two of mine. “I just, this is hard for me to say Eli, but I’ve had a hard time in Detroit, and I’ve missed my old friends so much and it made me realize I haven’t been a very good one to you. I shared so much with you, I just don’t want to lose you too, not because I never gave you a chance to share or didn’t make you feel as comfortable with me as I do with you.” I implored, my eyes wide and watery, from shame and real emotion, I had been a shitty friend, he seemed so lonely in this big empty house and I never reached out.

Elijah took a deep inhale before pulling me into him, and wrapping me in a deep hug, his nose buried in my neck. He let me go after a moment, and tried to run a hand through his hair, but felt the bun at the back of his head and stopped. “I’m uh, flattered (Y/n).” He coughed awkwardly before continuing. “I haven’t been much of a people person in a long time, and even when we were close I never wanted to burden you with my problems, I wanted to get to know you better.” He said, not quite meeting my eyes as he spoke, until that last bit, when he finally looked up and gave me a small grin.

“Hm, I remember you always liked games, how about we trade a question for a question? That way we both get to learn a little more about each other.” I offered, and he laughed.

“Alright, that seems fair, but I’m pretty sure that’s just open ended twenty questions.” I scoffed and rolled my eyes, “Oh? Do you have a better suggestion then?” I asked, quirking a brow and putting my hands on my hips, mockingly defensive. “No no, it’s alright. I’ll go first.” He said in between fading laughs, he brought a hand to his chin, jokingly stroking his goatee. “Hmm, What got you into writing about androids the way you do?”

“That’s an easy one, Eli.” I teased. “Just because their blood is a different color doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be equal. It’s the same as skin tone, gender, sexuality, and everything else that makes us all a little different. Where did you grow up?”

“Ann Arbor. What about you?”

“Detroit until I was 10, after that my family moved so much, I couldn’t even pick a place to name.”

“We never moved growing up, sometimes I wish we had. It was so boring being trapped in the same place for my whole life.”

“Is your family still around?”

“My mom, dad and half-brother are all still alive. What about your family?”

“My mom died of cancer three years ago. You know my dad Hank Anderson; he works for the DPD. My half brother Cole died when I was younger. Were you close with your brother growing up?”

“Half-brother, and no, he stayed with his mom, we never really spent time together, when we did we didn’t get along well, he’s an arrogant prick. What about Connor?”

“What do you mean?”

“How does he fit into your family?”

“I consider him a little brother. What’s his name, your half brother?”

“Gavin. Do you mind that Connor’s an android?”

I held back a gasp, I hadn’t thought Gavin would be Eli’s brother, possibly Gavin had to work a case involving Elijah in some way, but family? I guess they did look pretty similar when I thought about it, but maybe it was just a coincidence. “Of course not, Eli! You should know by now I have no problems with androids. Do you talk to your half-brother ever?”

“Holidays, my dad forces us together, but that’s it. Why are you so curious about him?”

“What am I not allowed to ask questions?” I said teasingly, hoping Elijah couldn’t see through me. “I just want to know more about you.” I gave him a soft smile and he seemed to relax.

“Yes, you’re allowed to ask questions and that one counts!” Overdramatically, I gasped and laughed. “I only have a few more questions, (Y/n).”

“Let me ask mine first!”

“It’s my turn.” He teased.

“Fine.”

“Are you seeing anyone right now?” He asked earnestly, his normal smirk was gone, a soft hopeful expression.

I paused, knowing what he was getting at. I didn’t want to lie to him, but the truth was vague enough it wasn’t too misleading I didn’t think.

“It’s um, it’s complicated, but no, not really.” I said, staring at my hands, not wanting to see his reaction.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, it’s weird, but I think whatever it was is pretty much over.” I laughed awkwardly.

“Ah. I’m sorry if it’s sad, but I’m not too sorry to hear that.” I looked up at him, and he grinned at me, before winking.

“So um, moving on from that, uh, what have you been doing since you left Cyberlife?”

“Oh. Don’t laugh, but right now I’ve been working on android pets, currently I’m still trying to figure out how to incorporate animal behavior into their design, so they aren’t just like regular androids who sit and wait for orders if they aren’t deviants. The cats are proving to be very tricky, as they are little gremlins but I don’t want them to be too awful.”

I squealed and jumped in my seat. “Oh my god how cute! Oh you have to show me please I want to see the kitties!” I grabbed his hands, trying to pull him off the couch.

He laughed heartily, but instead of allowing himself to be pulled up, he pulled me into him, and I stumbled, catching myself on his chest, our faces inches apart. He looked up at me and smiled, a real one, boyish and light, his whole face looked joyous and hopeful.

“Can I kiss you?” I stopped breathing for a moment, he looked so different, so hopeful, almost like he was begging me to say yes with his eyes. It would be so easy to just say yes.

“I…can I ask my question first?”

“It’s my turn, (Y/n), you made the rules.” He said softly, leaning closer, our noses brushing.

“No.” He jerked back as if I had slapped him, and I stumbled back. “I’m sorry, Eli. I just can’t. Not right now.” He nodded, looking away from me at his hands.

“It’s your turn, last question.” He seemed more interested in his hands than myself.  

“Is Gavin Reed your half-brother?” He closed his eyes.

“You’ve already met him.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yes.”

“That’s the colleague you spoke of last night.”

“Well, yes and no. I was under the impression I was meeting Nines, not Gavin.”

“But it was Gavin.”

“Yes.” I said softly. I looked down at my shoes. Gavin was jealous because Elijah’s his brother. I told Gavin his brother flirts with me, I told him I called his brother Eli not Mr. Kamski like a professional would.

“You like him, he’s your ‘complicated.’” Another sentence that should’ve been a question, but he was right. “I’ve never been able to get the timing right with you, (Y/n).”

“I’m sorry, Eli. It’s hard for me to separate work from my personal life. If we had met any other way…maybe things would be different, but even now if we were to get involved anymore than we are my work could be discredited.”

“I understand.”

“I’m so sorry.” He nodded. “I’m going to hug you now, is that okay?” He laughed and wrapped his arms around me.

“If you’re ever disgraced from your field, I’m going to expect a call from you.” I laughed and squeezed him.

“I will.” I pulled back. “I should probably go.” He nodded.

“I’ll call you a taxi.” He stood up and I followed him.

“Thank you, Eli.”

I got into the taxi. I had it pull away from the house and stop when the house was out of view. I grabbed my phone and texted Nines.

What’s Gavin’s address?

[howtodisassembleyourdeviant]

Overlooked Flowers pt.3 (Good end)

If you asked me to tag you, I'm not ignoring you, I just don't know what I'm doing yet and have to do all this from my phone.

Please enjoy!

Something wasn't right. It kept eating at him. You may have been reclusive lately, but you would always answer immediately, a minute at the most. However, It's been twenty since he asked you to 'hang out'. He missed you. He didn't like that you were pushing him away.

He stood up from his couch and headed towards the door.

"You're going to see her, aren't you?" Chloe's voice called from behind him. She had been spending more and more nights at his apartment. When things were good, he didn't mind, but things rarely stayed merry for long and when that happened, he felt like an intruder in his own home. During these times, he wished you would let him come over. He was comfortable around you, able to be himself. Unlike now, where he is contemplating telling Chloe that he got a call from the DPD, from Hank, or Markus, just to avoid the argument that telling the truth was sure to spawn. In the end, his preconstructions informed him of his low success rate, deciding it really didn't matter. He only gave a moment's pause before slipping his boots on.

"I have to. I think something's wrong."

"If you leave, I won't be here when you come back, " her voice had a dangerous edge to it. This was not the first time he had put you above her. They had many arguments about it, but it was about to be the last.

He looked over his shoulder before opening the door.

"I'm sorry."

And with that, he left.

Climbing into his car, Connor was surprised how easy it was to cut ties with Chloe. They had been in a relationship for two months now, and he did care for her. Surely this should affect him on some emotional level, but all that he could feel is dread. You still haven't answered him, even as he sent several more messages and tried calling you. It was making him frantic, pushing him to switch to manual steering, speeding around corners and intersections.

He managed to get to your house in record time. A knock and a call of your name only prompted your cat to start mewling loudly, but he knew you were home. He banged on your door before finally giving up on formalities and trying the handle. He was surprised to find it unlocked, panic surging through his artificial veins. It all came to a stop when he found you on the floor, reaching for your phone with blood-soaked fingers.

"Y/n!"

Wasting no time, he called for an ambulance as he bolted to your side. You were surrounded by flower petals stained a deep red. A quick scan confirmed his suspicions.

Hanahaki disease.

The roots were so entangled within that his scanner was having trouble differentiating between the roots and your arteries. He could see how they twisted around your inner workings, each it's own form of agony, and he could see where several had punctured through your lungs, slowly flooding your airways.

Carefully, he scooped you up and cradled you to his chest. The movement set off another fit, but it was weak, you being too tired to fight against it anymore.

"Help is on the way, just hang on, " his voice was strained, forcing the words out in an effort to calm you when you both knew they wouldn't be able to help. The accursed plant was too large now and unless it perished it would cause just as much damage to try and remove it.

Your glossy eyes fought to focus on him, mouthing his name but unable to say it, only a gurgled cough escaped along with more flower petals. The sound crushed his heart. He didn't know what to do. At this point, he wishes you had been assaulted by a burglar. At least then he would be able to attend to your wounds. How can he stop a flower from growing? Who could you love so much that you would die for them?

"Why? Why didn't you tell me?" His eyes welled up with tears, dripping down his face and onto your cheeks. He wants to find the person responsible. To break them to match how broken you are. Only an idiot could deny the chance to be with you.

Unable to speak, you reached your hand up, cupping his face, thumb rubbing against his cheek, wiping away his tears. He could feel a warm wetness from your palm, knowing it was likely your blood, but he didn't care. He leaned into your touch, placing one of his hands over yours.

Your lips moved, mouthing the words that made him realize that he was the idiot. A sob escaped him, watching as you slipped in and out of consciousness. Your hand went limp against his cheek.

"Please... Don't go... Don't leave me, " he sobbed, pulling you closer, "I... I love you. I love you so much." How could he be so stupid? You gave him everything he asked so freely, and he had mistaken the feelings that had bloomed as friendship rather than something more, something deeper. He can't lose you. "I love you, " he whispered against your ear as he held you closer against his chest.

You sharply gasped, eyes wide before you began a fresh wave of coughing, this one far more violent. It was in this moment that the paramedics burst through the door, shoving the android out of the way and rushing you to the back of the ambulance. He didn't even have a chance to say goodbye. All you left behind was a single, dead petal. He picked it up and clutched it to his chest.

You were in surgery for 17 hours as android and human alike worked together to repair the damage and remove the now dead, shriveled plant from within your inner workings. 17 hours with no news as Connor paced the entire time, still clutching the withered petal against him. Seeing it, feeling its course surface, he is reminded there is a chance. That, with it dead, you could be saved.

Hank stopped by during the tenth hour, after hearing what happened when Connor didn't show up for his shift. Hank had known you were sick, caught you coughing into a black handkerchief, the color likely hiding the blood. Anytime he asked you about it, you brushed him off, eventually snapping at him to leave you alone. He had no idea what it was, or that it was this bad. Had he had known, he wouldn't have been so quick to back off. Of course, being what it is, you likely would have continued on your self-destructive path, unwilling to lose your emotions. Can't really blame ya. As much as he wished to stop feeling after Cole, he couldn't imagine life without them, like a machine.

"Connor, sit your ass down, she's gonna be fine," Hank groused. he wasn't very confident about his declaration, he's seen what hanahaki can do to a person, but he'd say anything if it would calm his partner down, make him get rid of that broken look on his face. Connor acknowledged him, sat for all of five minutes, clutching something in his hand, before standing back up and returning to pacing back and forth.

Where the hell was Chloe? Wait, scratch that. Connor, looking like a stiff breeze could blow him over, over another woman, a woman even Hank thought he was gonna get serious with, and, to top it off, the woman is only dying because of him... yeah, if he were Chloe, he wouldn't be here either. probably would've dumped his ass.

"Wearin' a path into the floor ain't gonna make them work any faster. Just calm down." Connor looked over at him, the sight breaking the old man's heart.

"I can't."

That was all he could get out of the devastated android. He stood, grabbing Connor by the shoulder and pulling him into a tight embrace. The RK800 stood frozen for a moment before a sob escaped his throat, hands gripping tightly at the lieutenant's coat. Hank held him, feeling him quake with every hushed cry.

"She'll be alright, she'll pull through," he consoled, a few tears escaping his own eyes as his heart ached for his boy. After a long while, Connor had finally calmed down, releasing his death grip on Hank's jacket and pulling back, giving the man a brief, wry smile.

"Thanks, Hank, " he breathed, letting it out while wiping at his face. Glancing at his, now empty, hands, Connor looked to the ground, searching urgently for something. Before Hank could question it, he seemed to have found what he was looking for, watching him pick up what looked like a small, old leaf.

"Whatcha got there?" Connor hesitantly held it out for him to see, as if Hank would snag it away like he had done with so many of his quarters.

"She had coughed it up right when the paramedics showed up, " he pulled it back to his chest.

"So it died?" Hank sounded incredulous, eyeing the android.

"I... I told her I love her..."

The grizzled lieutenant merely nodded. The plant could only die if genuine feelings are expressed. He had to bite his tongue against saying 'bout damn time', knowing that would only worsen the poor kid's pain. He had no idea, and you were willing to die rather than voice your feelings, claiming to want Connor to 'find his own way'. Hank knew better. You were scared. Once you were better, Hank was gonna give you an earful for letting fear and pride blind you and damn near kill you.

Hank was there for another three hours before Fowler called him. He was adamant about staying, but Connor urged him to go, only agreeing under the condition that he is informed the second you were out of surgery.

………..

The head surgeon came out, informing him of the damage he already knew of and all the work needed to pull you back from the brink. You weren't out of the woods, but you were stable. He was thankful that you had listed him as your emergency contact, as when they tried to explain you were still in bad shape and resting, he went to your room anyway. He had to see you, no matter what state you are in.

You had so many machines hooked to you, and your frail form seemed more so against the stark white bed. Connor sat in the chair beside you, taking one of your fragile hands between his own, the petal he had clung to this entire time, now resting in his breast pocket. He watched as your chest gently rose and fell, but it felt so artificial, being forced in by the tube down your throat. A scan of your body revealed all the work that had gone in to save you, and the devastation the plant had wreaked. He watched your heart, beating at a languid pace, matching the slow beeps of the monitor. It was weak, but it was there.

Your face was so pale, and you looked so worn. How long had you been battling against the manifestation of your lament? Why couldn't you have just told him? So many nights spent lying tangled together... why didn't you ask him to stay? Had he understood human emotions more, understood his own better...

There was no going back, now.

he stayed by your side, unmoving even as the nurses would try to tell him that you needed your rest, to come back during visitor hours. Knowing of your condition deterred them from doing much else. He only moved when the nurses needed to care for you, returning to your side the second they were done. He asked Hank to care for your cat. Connor felt terrible for leaving the feline alone after it had witnessed such a tragic event, but he couldn't leave you, not again. Whatever happens now, he will be here, by your side.

Two days passed with no change. Hank stopped by a couple of times, but he didn't stay for long, feeling like he was intruding. He would ask if Connor wanted anything and if he thought of something, just let him know. A couple of your friends had stopped by as well, the few that still cared for you even as you pushed them away. Once they learned what happened, they realized what you were doing, what you had done to hide your illness. They left little gifts, as flowers felt a little inappropriate, considering the situation, wishing you well. One brought a fleece blanket, knowing how much you loved the soft material and how you hated feeling cold. How ironic it was that your favorite season was Winter. Most ignored his existence, though two glared at him. How could he blame them, sitting here, going over memory after memory. It was there, your feelings written in everything you did. how he did not see was beyond him.

A jarring sound broke him from his thoughts. A sustained beep resonating from your monitor. Panicked, he scanned your chest to find your heart still, lifeless. A few nurses burst in, paging for a doctor while trying to resuscitate you. They knocked him out of the way, and he watched in horror as they fought to bring you back.

"Don't go," he whimpered, seeing them bring out the paddles. Your body jumped when they pressed them down to your chest, the monitor hiccuping before flatlining once more. He couldn't handle it. His chest aching in a way he had never experienced before, making him want to rip his own thirium pump out to make it stop.

"DON'T GO!!!" he cried out despairingly. One of the nurses looked to him in annoyance.

"Get him out of here." Two large men came up, attempting to grab him. He struggled and fought, trying to remain with you. One of them punched him in the temple...

He jolted in his seat, unaware of his surroundings for a second. He was still in your hospital room. You remained in bed, unaware of the outside world.

At some point, he had slipped into stasis, the stress bleeding into his dreamscape, resulting in the horrible nightmare that left him trembling. You had not gone into cardiac arrest. You had not left him. A diagnostic told him he had entered low power mode for 7 hours. He couldn't believe so much time had passed and he didn't notice. Still, he picked up your hand and held your wrist against his ear, listening to the steady pulse. It was enough for now.

The soothing thumps kept lulling the emotionally drained android in and out of stasis. Though, with the added reassurance, it was a dreamless slumber, his body merely processing background information and attempting to maintain, if not lower, his elevated stress level by shutting down as many systems as it could without causing issues. The hours passed by in what felt like minutes.

The following day, they decided to remove your artificial breathing. The doctor observed as the android nurse removed the tube from your throat. Connor watched with bated breath, fear striking him like lightning each second your chest remained still. Finally, you sucked in a harsh breath, gasping a few times before your breathing stabilized, slow and uneven and very much alive. A tear escaped his eye as relief washed over him.

On day nine, a tug at his hands and the loss of your warmth against his face brought him out of stasis once more.

Your eyes were fluttering open, hands going into the blanket, balling the material up in your fists.

"Ahh," you gasped, eyes wide as tears began to form. Your monitor began beeping faster, heart racing as you struggled to figure out what was happening. Your rapid breathing irritated your damaged throat, triggering a coughing fit, making it worse. You pulled at the iv in your arm, panic rising. Connor quickly pulled your hand away before you could get it out, then paged a nurse. He put his hand on your cheek, trying to get your attention.

"Y/n, it's alright, you're at the hospital," he was unsure if his words were registering in your pain-laced mind, "I've got you... I've got you."

Your coughing eased as your breathing started to slow, but the tears continued to fall. There was some blood on your lips, prompting Connor to scan you. Luckily, there was minimum damage, nothing that would require you to go back into surgery. The nurse finally showed up. Seeing the situation, she promptly left again, grabbing a needle and injecting your IV with liquid relief. Your hand gripped his free hand tightly before you were out once more. It was an intense interaction, but you had awakened. He planted a small kiss on your brow, wiping your tears away and dabbing away the blood, promptly returning to his previous position, feeling more hopeful than before. He didn't let go of your hand.

You were improving, and soon he would be able to tell you how he feels, without fear and despair enveloping everything. When you are better, he might even scold you a bit for keeping such a huge secret from your "best friend". He wondered what will they be now? "Dating", as he had classified him and Chloe? Or, perhaps, "girlfriend and boyfriend" as Chloe had labeled them? Than again, considering all that the two of you have done in the past, would it be the title of " lovers"? He supposes he'll leave those titles for you to decide, as long as he can label you "mine" and you do the same in return.

It would be two more days before you would regain consciousness again. Hank had brought him spare clothes the previous day, as when you had woken up, something within himself woke up as well. He felt more alive than the previous days, more himself.

With it, he noticed how disheveled he was, pointing out that he was still wearing the clothes from the night he had found you, the blood long dried and beyond smelling like copper to a rancid scent that could not be healthy. In his trance, he had not noticed, but now, he was certain you would not appreciate the foul air once you woke up again. Most of the blood on his cheek had been washed away by his tears, but some still remained, sticking to his face unpleasantly. He borrowed the bathroom that was adjacent to your bed, washing his face and hands before switching clothes. He wanted to look presentable for when you awoke again.

He had also requested for an extra sweater, which he draped over you. In one of his memories, he had forgotten his sweater at your house. When he went to retrieve it, he found that you were sleeping, the sweater held close to your chest. At the time, he thought you were cold, as the blanket was kicked off of you, so he carefully took his sweater from your arms and pulled the blanket up. Seeing it now, he cringed, having realized that was probably the worst conclusion and action he could have come up with.

When you awoke, it was not nearly as dramatic as the last time. Your eyes were slow to focus, and you kept trying to look around, confused. Eventually, your eyes found him, beginning to fill with tears. You tried to say something, but with your dry, damaged throat, all that came out was a breathy wheeze.

"Don't speak. You could further injure yourself." You nodded slightly, placing your hand over his. He picked it up and brought it to his lips. You smiled, one he matched with his own. With your free hand, you gestured, asking for some water.

"They don't want you drinking too much while your throat is swollen, but I'll see if you can have some ice." He tries to stand, but you tighten your grip on his hand, distressed.

"I'll be right back, " he bent down, gently placing a kiss on your lips, " and I'm not going anywhere."

"I…l…ve…ou, " your voice was barely there, but it was enough to make Connor's heart swell.

"I love you, too." It felt like a great weight had been lifted off his chest, watching your smile widen as you gently tugged on his tie to bring him back to your lips. He was sure he looked goofy, unable to keep himself from grinning.

……..

Hank came by a few hours later. He found Connor lying across your lap, his lower half propped up on a chair. One of your hands was tangled in his hair, your thumb caressing his crown. Your other hand was being held by his, breaking contact only when you needed to pop an ice cube into your mouth. You were both watching the tv across from your bed, some crime show, acting as if you were both simply at home and not in a hospital room after you almost kicked the bucket. You both had your own suspects, Connor using the evidence to explain his. Hank had no idea what you were saying. You would tap on Connor's head to get his attention so he could read your lips. Based on the scrap of paper by your bed, you both had been at this for a while, one check by your name, three by Connor's and five under both. Neither of you even noticed him until he cleared is throat. You seemed happy to see him, giving him a wave and a smile.

"Hello, Hank." Connor regarded him. If he didn't know better, he never would have guessed this was the same android that was on the verge of a complete mental breakdown not even two weeks ago and who had been sitting here since, the poster-child for depression.

"Don't you fuckin' 'hi Hank' me!" Hank barked, and instinctively you shrunk down into the sheets, avoiding eye contact. Connor sat up, sitting on the edge of the bed with his feet in the chair, "you two just gonna pretend nothing happened? You've been on the verge of killin' yerself, and now yer just chillin'? And you! You treat your friends like shit, quit yer job, almost kill yerself, and now yer sitting here, watching tv like it's any other regular day at home? Fuck you!"

"I-sor-ak! I-d-n't-an-" your words were incomprehensible, and Connor tried to tell you to stop, but it wasn't until you started coughing that you ceased. Connor glared at him.

"She can't even speak right now, what good would it do to chastise her?" When your fit ended, he held the cup of ice for you, taking one and slipping it into your mouth, "Besides, I've found, from personal experience, that near death experiences carry their own lesson."

"I'd believe that if you ever learned to listen to me, " Hank groused, hands crossed over his chest. Perhaps now was not the best time for this, but its hard not to get pissed off when the people who've you been scared shitless for are just laying about without a care in the world.

You tapped Connor, pointing to your lips and than to Hank. Catching on, he nodded and waited for you to start.

"I'm sorry, Hank, " Connor began, relaying your message by reading your lips, "I didn't want you to worry. I figured if everyone hated me it would hurt less when I was gone."

"Bullshit. Ya should've just told Connor, you fuckin' idiot!"

You scoffed, smiling at the lieutenant.

"Yep." You leaned forward and kissed Connor before settling back into the pillows, Connor following suit, laying back on your lap and taking your hand back in his.

"There's another chair over there, " Connor gestured to the far wall, "you're welcome to join us."

Hank shook his head before scoffing himself. Everything ended alright, might as well not dwell on what could have happened. He dragged the chair to the other side of your bed, jostling your hair before sitting down. You quickly fixed it before adding Hank to the roster, smiling at the makeshift family. To think you could have lost this. You really were an idiot, but you were an idiot in love, and it feels so much better when its reciprocated.

[ask-clony]

Vodka & Energy Drink (Part Two)

(Part One)

A/N: Requests are open! We just wanted to share some of our Clony stuff, hope you like! We’re still practicing our English, so sorry about any mistakes! Hope there are still some Clony fans out there.

Pairing: Clay x Tony

Word count: 2447

Warnings: Alcohol, inappropriate language

(Read under the cut)

All his body is shaking and it feels good, Tony's mouth tastes like the drink they're sharing. 

Tony couldn't move, return the kiss or even close his eyes. He doesn't even know if his heart is still beating, maybe not, 'cause his entire body goes numb. The only thing that proves he is still alive is the soft, almost inaudible, sigh - or was it a moan? - that he lets out on the other boy's mouth. 

Clay moves his face away just a bit, his eyes widening, he's completely flushed. The other boy's lack of reaction makes Clay Jensen feel that there's something wrong.  

Now is Tony going to tell him to stop and leave him alone? 

What should I do?

“I'm sorry!  I-I shouldn't have done that, I... I…” He twists his mouth, both hands still holding the tattooed boy's face, trembling a lot. “Oh, shit, I did it again...”

Tony finally blinks, like coming back to reality. The fact is that he didn't feel so good in weeks and he wants to feel that again.

“It's okay. Do it again. "His eyes look down to Clay's lip, biting his own “Please…”

The taller boy stutters.  Not even he himself knows what he’s trying to say, but as he hears ‘please’ he approaches again, this time with even more urgency, as if he wants to do that before Tony changes his mind.  

It’s completely strange to kiss a boy when you’re so sure about your sexual orientation. 

The adrenaline makes you numb and you think about a thousand things at the same time. 

Does it look wrong?  Maybe yes. 

Clay wanted to stop? No, obviously not.  

He just wanted to kiss Tony Padilla as much as he could.

It still takes a few seconds for Tony to realize that's really happening, but as soon as he gets it, he starts returning it. He feels so wrong, at the same time all he ever wanted is happening and he doesn't want to stop. 

Their kisses are so wet and urgent, still Clay's lips are so soft and they seem to fit his own lips pretty well. So well that’s such a waste it took them so long to do this, to come together in this way. The plastic cup ended up on the first thing Tony could reach without breaking their contact: the small couch they have on that studio. 

So, now, fully concentrated on the boy in front of him, Tony Padilla can feel exactly how their lips slide against each other, making soft noises as they finish one kiss and immediately attach them again for another one, and another one, over and over. Until Tony is breathing heavily against Clay's mouth, still he doesn't stop but does the opposite: now his tongue is touching the boy's upper lip a few times, almost begging for permission to access his mouth, to touch his tongue. 

Clay slides a hand to Tony's collar, he doesn't want it to end. Once he feels Tony's tongue on his lip, he touches it with his own. The kisses become even wetter and deeper. 

One, two, three...He stopped counting. It doesn't  matter, but it's like if he needs something to focus on or he'll freak out. Only the sound of the two of them can be heard in that room and it's really good. That sounds amazing to Clay. He never felt so good in his life and he didn't want to compare, but the kisses with Hannah or Skye didn't leave him that way, so euphoric.

The tattooed boy slides his hands through Clay's chest, firmly holding his shirt with both hands. He lets Clay set the pace, what he doesn't do often. Tony gave his best, the best kiss he could give someone. At that moment he wasn't thinking about anything but how he should move to fit their lips or wrap their tongues. Sometimes he would just lick the boy's upper lip, because that's one of his favorite things about him. It has a perfect shape, it's soft and now it tastes like energy drink and the vodka's bitterness. He puts an end to it, because he really needs to breathe, by taking that perfect upper lip between his own lips, kissing it slowly, making another soft sound as he gently sucks it and moves away. 

Clay lets out a low hiss, he still has his eyes closed as Tony moves away, running his own tongue slowly on his own lips.  The pale boy is panting, as if he had done a physical endurance test for the past ten minutes, like when the teacher orders them to run and run. It feels just as hot.  He opens his eyes slowly, barely waiting to feel those lips again. Those perfect lips.

“Is ...every... every...thing o-okay?... C-can I ... k-kiss you ... again?” Clay's voice is just a soft whisper because his heart is bothering him jumping in his throat.

Tony lets out a low chuckle, looking away as he tries to catch his breath.

“Wasn't that enough to satisfy your curiosity?”

He knows Clay is not using him, or deep inside he wants to believe that, still he feels weird, 'cause no one ever caused him so much at once. So he quickly raises a ‘wall’, afraid of being used and left by Clay Jensen, someone he loves so much. He can't feel sad if it happens. It's a party, people do it all the time, they kiss and outside it's like it never happened. Tony looks at him, swallowing. Those thoughts go away as he stares at the other boy's eyes and he opens his mouth, letting that feeling consume him again, that numbness.

“Yeah...kiss me.”

Clay swallows and twists his mouth, he looks down, feeling a strange pain in his chest, that feeling spreads to his body, gradually losing its strength. 

“I'm sorry... I didn't... want it to... sound... that way.” He blinks a few times, his eyes slightly blurred. Crying in front of Tony is out of  question, Clay knows he didn't mean to sound that way too. “I ... I didn't ... want you to think that I did-- I'm doing it because I'm curious…” He forces a smile as he looks up, feeling that pain again. “I'm sorry…”

Maybe Tony doesn't want Clay to have high expectations. It's okay. He approaches again, slowly this time, afraid. As he touches Tony's lips all the pain goes away. 

This time Tony takes his face between his hands, kissing him slowly and softly.

“It's okay…” The shorter boy says it softly, his kisses as sweet as his words. “It's...okay.”

Tony knows he was a bit rude, also he knows it would make Clay feel bad about it. It's just the way Clay Jensen is. But he meant it when he repeated that there's nothing wrong. It doesn't take much time for them to be intensely kissing each other again.

Kissing has never been something so incredible for the taller boy.  He has had a not-so-significant amount of kisses before, from gambling to mere curiosity, but none compare to Tony's kisses.  Clay laughs at himself in thought for sounding so silly in his mind.  He nods when the shorter boy confirms that there is nothing wrong and corresponds to the kisses, deepening them.  Often Clay just pulls away so he can get closer again after looking into the other's eyes, as if he wants to be sure who he is kissing.  He nibbles and sucks the tattooed boy's lower lip, gaining a certain confidence as he tries to imitate what Tony does to him.

Time didn't stop, it feels like it did, but it didn't. It passed half an hour and they didn't seem to want to stop. 

Not yet. 

Only one more kiss... or two, maybe three. 

Was it the drink? Could it be that it has too much vodka in it? 

Tony doesn't care at all. His arms are around Clay's neck right now, as he needs him to bend over a little, so he could deepen their kiss even more, and then soften it again. He changes it from time to time, so they have a little time to breathe without moving away. He's actually controlling himself so he won't do anything else than kissing.  If they weren't in that room, at that party, would this have happened?  Probably not.  Clay would never have had the courage to approach Tony like that and they were never really alone. Having him all to himself is good, so good that Clay can't help but hug the shorter boy tightly. It's like if he needs Tony to exist now and that scares him. The pale boy never realized that contact was so pleasurable, so good. 

He pushes the tattooed boy until they are both sitting on the small couch. The plastic cup falls to the floor, spreading the rest of the drink there. Their lips part for a few seconds, but Clay wastes no time in kissing the other boy again. The kisses are now slower but deeper. He pulls Tony onto his lap.

And Tony is so numb he could say he was high, but not enough to don't hear the door being slowly opened and a familiar voice coming inside together with the now not so loud music. For their luck, Alex Standall was talking to someone else while opening the door, looking over his shoulder to the other person. 

Was it Jordan? Cole? 

Doesn't matter. 

When he looked at them, Tony was already on his feet again, a few steps from Clay on the couch, looking to the floor, breathless.

“Uh, sorry, Clay. Jor fell asleep and we cleaned the shit. Me and Cole. I think it's time to go. Can you give me a ride home?” The boy frowns at them. “You okay?” 

If it weren't for Alex, maybe they would never stop it and Clay would have loved it to never end. He even feels bad for cursing someone so much, mentally apologizing for wanting his friend to disappear.

“I'm okay!” He clears his throat and gets up too, pretending to touch his cell phone. “Yes, I'm okay! I’ll take you home! Ahn, you can wait for me downstairs, I'll just clean up the mess I made here.” He chuckles nervously, bending down to pick up the plastic cup.

“Did I interrupt something? If you wanna talk, I can jus—”

“No. I was just leaving!” Tony bites his lip, closing his eyes a bit. He just received a slap of reality. They really did that. “Sorry.” He passes by Alex, almost running downstairs.

“Oh, right. Is everything really okay?” Alex's eyes follow Tony for a bit, then goes back at Clay.

“Y-yes! It doesn't look like it is okay? Why? I'm okay! It's okay. I need to talk to Tony!”

"Well, it doesn't, really.” Alex chuckles. “You look like you have seen a ghost! Go there, talk to him, I’ll wait for you in your car. No problem!”

"Okay! I'll not take too long! Wait for me!”

He runs downstairs, going outside.This could simply be left behind, because things like that happen at parties. All the time. But that would mean that Tony was right about him just being curious, wouldn't it?

And Clay didn't want the other to think that way.

He missed the opportunity the first time, when the one responsible for leaving butterflies in his stomach was a girl. When Hannah Baker left him completely charmed. That's why it sounded strange, Clay was always sure about the feelings he had for Hannah.

But life goes on. Clay also changed.

“I am not myself anymore...”

As a result, the way he saw Tony also changed. And he hated to think that maybe it was because he was needy.

“No, it wasn't that. It can't be. If it was that, Skye would have been enough.”

He goes down the stairs quickly, skipping some steps. Tony is no longer at the house. So Clay just shouts his name as he crosses the garden, heading for the sidewalk. He won't let that go. Not this time.

“TONY!!!”

Tony swallows as he hears Clay's voice, he's unlocking his car slowly, because his hands are trembling. 

Regret? No. He is sure he would do anything for the blue-eyed boy. Anything. 

His eyes meet Clay's, but he's quiet, waiting for him to say something.

“It wasn't just curiosity!” The pale boy approaches. “I don't want you to think that I'm that kind of person, okay?! I care about you! A lot! I really do!” His hands are shaking too, he's moving them as he speaks. “It wasn't just a... thing! I mean... Not just a ...k-kiss... Okay it was definitely not just a kiss…” He frowns, compressing his lips. “I-I... I ...  I don't know if you... will hate me... I hope you don't hate me... I'm not saying we need to date!” Clay gasps, his face is all red. “Sorry! If it was just a kiss and I'm imagining things! Can we still be friends?!  I ... I don't want you... to... I don't know... avoid me or something like that!”

Tony frowns, looking at him. He feels stupid, because he doesn't know what to do or to say. The things between them will probably be weird from now on, they were even before, and the two of them were just trying to avoid making it even weirder, but they fucked it up tonight. He looks down, finishing unlocking his car and opening the door. He shakes his head slowly, taking a deep breath, hating himself for a minute.

“Do you…” Tony looks back at the taller boy. “Do you need a ride home?”

“A-Alex... is... waiting for me.” The other looks down. “C-can I see you ... tomorrow?” He lifts his eyes at Tony, swallowing.

“Okay.” The tattooed boy nods, smiling softly. “I see you tomorrow, Clay. Hope you don't have a headache… Because of the drink!”  He adds when he sees the other boy's confused face.

Tony almost gets in the car, but stops again.

“It wasn't.” This time he doesn't look at the other boy, he's afraid. “J-just a kiss... I mean... I like you. I always did.” Nods again, maybe realizing this wasn't the right time to say that, so he gets in the car immediately.

Clay's heart looks like a little bomb ticking. His stomach hurts. All he can do is nod.

“See you ... t-tomorrow…”

He smiles in a sweet, almost silly way - because of Tony's last sentence -, not sure what to answer, he walks away from the red car, without turning his back to Tony.