#its like my default tense now

[sugume]

YOUR BIGGEST FAN — GETO SUGURU

✧･. on vacation with your family, you discover that your biggest fan may not be a mystery after fall.

( TW ) f!reader. camgirl!reader. stepbrother!Geto (in a plot device way, no nii-chan and stuff.) unprotected sex. cream pie. phone sex. squirting. fingering. mutual masturbation. cunnilingus. deception. mentions of bullying. misunderstandings. hurt/comfort. explicit content.  

word count - > 6.6k

authors note. can you see I wasn’t creative with the username? I have a love-hate relationship with this fic because I feel like it goes from 0 to 100 real quick lmfao. This is heavily inspired by the book Eyes on Me! 

“I bet you look handsome.” You smile at the black screen with the default profile picture floating in the middle. 

‘Nah.’ User @Sssman72  types into the chat the takes up the left half of your computer. 

“Stop! Don’t say think bad things about yourself,” You laugh, making sure your tits jiggle in the flimsy red lingerie you're wearing. “I know your handsome baby.” You reassure your favorite client. The man who alone gives you 50% of your income. He’s the one who bought you this pretty lingerie set you're wearing.  

‘You look tired babydoll...how was today?’ He types. 

“I’m fine, I promise, just had a long day, was on a few other private chats with some other customers the entire day.” You confess. In all honesty after this call you were planning to pass out and try to get a few hours of sleep before you had to fly out to your family's vacation home. Today on your live stream, you told your followers you were going on vacation for the next two weeks and wouldn't be online. You didn't plan to get on a call with @Sssman72 but he had texted you as you were getting ready to go to bed that he had a bad day and wanted to see you. Before you had a chance to protest, he spent you 500 and said it would only be 30 minutes. You gave in because first he was your biggest supporter and you wanted to be there for him in some way with all the money and gifts, he sends you and second, you didn’t mind chatting with him, you thought he was the sweetest and you struck lucky the day he joined one of your lives.  

‘I’ll let you go then, I want you to get some rest before your flight, sorry for keeping you up beautiful just needed to vent about my ass job.’ 

“I’m always here for you handsome, I'll make sure to send you those pictures you requested through the week.” 

‘Make sure you enjoy your break babydoll, don’t gotta worry about me. Goodnight.’ 

You say your goodbyes and end up falling asleep in the lingerie bought you as soon as you shut your laptop. 

— 

“How’s college y/n?” Your stepfather asks when you slide into the back seat of the car. Your mother fitting the last of your luggage into the trunk.  

“it’s fine, some of my classes are difficult but nothing I can't manage.” You answer as you buckle in. 

“Oh yeah? Thats good. You mom tells me you started a job a few months ago, how's that working out for you?”  

You tense under the small blanket you’ve thrown over yourself. 

“u-uhm yeah its good—yeah it’s been fun.” 

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I don't remember what you mother told me you did again.” He chuckles. 

“Uhm—I'm a bartender, m-my friend works there and got me a position.” You tell him the lie you've rehearsed hundreds of times. You start to sweat under the blanket. Did he buy it? What if he and your mom found out what you did? Are they planning to ambush you when you get to the house? They're going to make you drop out and chain you up in the basement when they find out. You throw the blanket off, suddenly too hot and alert. Guess that nap you were planning on taking during the drive wasn’t happening. 

“Oh, that’s fun sweetheart, I remember I bartended awhile when I was in college, got fired for stealing the alcohol though,” He laughs at the memory before turning to look at you. “You wouldn’t do that though, you’re a good girl.” 

You nod, thankful that your mom decided now to take your stepdad's attention away and get in the car. 

“Alrighty were good to!” She cheers. Your stepdad turns back around in his seat before starting the car. 

“Finally, thought we were going to get a fine parked here another minute.” 

“Oh, shut up! Y/n are you excited to go back to the vacation house? You haven’t been in years!” You mom asks as you guys pull out of the airport.  

“Yeah, I can’t wait to, I missed the hiking trails and the waterfalls. None of that in the big city.” You answer truthfully. You did miss the silence of the secluded house you vacationed at every summer since your mom married your stepdad. It was the company that you hated. As if your mom heard your thought, she says something that makes your heart drop. 

“Suguru feels the same way, we didn't even have to blackmail him to come! That boy...” 

“Suguru is coming?” You scream.  

“Coming? Sweetie, he’s already arrived this morning. I’m so excited were all together as a family again.” 

“Are you fucking serious mom? Turn the car around and bring me back to the airport!” You screech. You were not going to spend the next week with your bully of a stepbrother.  

“Y/n!” You mom gasps. 

“Sweetheart, he’s changed.” Your stepdad tells you as if that's going to make it better. 

“That’s what he wants you to think! He’s the worst human being on planet earth, please don’t make me spend the next few weeks with him, please mom,” you lean over the consul. “Please dad.” You pout at your stepfather. You know he gets weak whenever you call him dad. 

“Sweetheart...” 

“No! You aren’t sweet talking your way out of this, he’s changed. He isn't the same teenager with a chip on his shoulder, he’s matured. He even told me the reason he’s coming is to apologize and bond with you y/n.” 

“He’s lying mom! He doesn't care about me; I wouldn't be surprised if he told you that just so he could drown me in the lake. You guys own the land so nobody would find my body!” You start to tear up. You were going to jump out of the car if your parents didn't turn back around. Your stepbrother was your biggest tormentor since the day you met him. From picking on you at home to getting the girls to bully you at school. He made your life hell for four years. The day you left for college you screamed how much you hated him and told your parents that the four of you would only be in the same room again when you lay in a casket. 

“Oh, don’t cry sweetheart. Your mother is right, he’s changed, I wouldn’t have allowed him around you if he hadn’t. Give us a week and if you want to leave, I promise I'll drive you back to the airport and you’ll never have to see him again, please?” 

“No.” You cross your arms and look out the window despite knowing that they’ve won. You can’t jump out of the car now that you are on the highway, and you didn’t bring your own car to drive yourself back to the airport. 

“We’ll give you the master suite, the whole attic floor to yourself.” They bargain. You act like you’re thinking of accepting the offer. With the master suite taking up the entire third floor you could lock yourself up there and ignore Suguru. You could also film videos and even go live because the room is soundproof. You perk up at that. You could just spend your vacation on stream and chatting with @Sssman72. He’s somehow always free for you and told you that if you get bored you could call him. He’ll make up for your stepbrother’s awful behavior. 

“Fine, I’ll take the master suite.” 

— 

“Okay that's the last of your luggage, we’ll be having dinner in a few hours on the dock.” 

“Kay, thanks.”  You watch your stepdad shut the door. Once he does you release the tension in your shoulders. You lock the door before running to throw yourself onto the huge king bed. You sink down. You didn’t see Suguru when you arrived, you mom told you he was probably in town. You hope he stayed in town for the next two weeks.  

After laying it bed thinking about how much you hate Suguru with a passion you pull out your phone and open the porn app. You click on messages and open your chat with @Sssman72. 

‘Hey...I know I told you I was on vacation but I already wanna go home. You don't have to answer lol.’ You send. He immediately starts typing.  

‘Of course, I'll answer you babydoll. What’s wrong?’  Your face heats at the pet names. You wish you knew what he looked like, all he told you about himself was that he was in his twenties and worked for his father's company. You want to know more, what he looks like, what he sounds like. If the messages he sends make you sweat, you wonder what’ll happen if he spoke to them to you. In your head he’s a handsome bachelor who just so happened to find you and deem you worthy of his time and money but hell, he could be lying. He could be some old rich man in his eighties who likes young girls like all the rest of your viewers. The romantic part of you ignores that and is convinced he is who he says he is and that one day you’re going to meet in person and fall in and have a bunch of his babies. 

‘You know that stepbrother I told you about?’ 

“Mm, that asshole who bullied you?’ 

‘Yep, that asshole. Anyways I bet you won't guess who's here on vacation with me?’ 

‘Are you serious?’ 

‘Dead serious...my parents didn’t tell me until I was already trapped and now, I have to spend my vacation away with a man who hates me for no reason.’ 

‘Wow that’s crazy lol. Did your parents tell you why he chose to vacation with you if he doesn’t like you?’ 

‘Apparently he’s here to make amends...he’s probably here to kill me so he gets all the inheritance.’ 

‘Well, what if he’s really there to make amends baby?’ 

‘You should've heard the groan I just let out. I can’t believe you’re on his side babe. When I tell you that he too evil for that I mean it.’ 

‘Hey, you know I'm always on your side babydoll, I'm just giving you a man’s perspective on it. Maybe he realized he’s fucked up and he feels back so he wants to apologize for all the wrong he caused you’ 

‘Yea well from a women's perspective he’s an asshole who doesn’t care about anyone else but himself!’ 

‘Don’t say the baby...hypothetically what would he have to do to get you to forgive him?’ 

‘Hypothetically he's going to have to get on his knees and beg for my forgiveness every time he sees me until I deem, he's forgiven. And he’s also gonna have to send every dollar in his bank account to me AND be my slave for the rest of his life...hypothetically.’ 

‘Lol you never know babydoll, he just might be willing to do anything for your forgiveness. I know I would.’ 

‘That’s because you’re perfect and care about my feelings...now I'm gonna go get some sleep before having to eat with the devil. Pray he doesn’t poison me and I survive the night.’ 

— 

You sit at the dinning room table waiting for Suguru. Of course, he’s late, he doesn’t care about anyone's time but his. You say so to your parents. 

“Y/n stop being so harsh and give him a chance please.” You roll your eyes and go back to scrolling on social media.  

“Sorry I'm late.” You jump at the deep voice before whipping your head to the left where your stepbrother stands looking so...so different. 

“Suguru! No need to apologize! Come sit.” Your mother points to the empty seat opposite you. Suguru glances at you and smiles before walking to the seat. You gasp. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him smile at you or anyone else. Actually, you know he hasn’t smiled at anyone, he was know for being so stoic. You watch intensely as he pulls out the chair and sits. He looks like a different man, his hair is long, down past his shoulders, the black shirt he's wearing stretches around a huge chest. He looks like he spends half his day in the gym. And those eyes—those eyes that always had heavy eyebags and glared at everyone that looked his way, look at you with gentle look you can’t place. They even crease with the smile that he’s wearing. Your eyes widen, he has a fucking dimple. He looks like a gentleman, he looks handsome. You can't stop staring at his smile. 

“Y/n? You alright?” You Stepdad breaks through the haze you were in. You look at your parents and back to Suguru who all have concerned expressions on their faces.  You feel your entire body heat in embarrassment.  

‘Uhm—yea I'm fine.” You look at your parents, refusing to look back at that smile.  Suguru has different plans. 

“Hey y/n, it’s been a long time yeah?” Suguru says in that deep voice that has your heart beating faster.  Out the corner of your eye you watch as Suguru reaches over the food, holding his hand out. Does he really think you’re about to give him a damn handshake?  

...Are you seriously thinking about shaking that huge hand? No, you won’t. 

You purse your lips and cross your arms over your chest. You swear you see him glance down at your cleavage but the next second, he's holding eye contact. You blink and look away with a ‘hmm’. He lowers his hand.  

“Alright guys let's eat, okay?” You mom breaks the tension. Everyone grabs their share, and you eat in silence for a while, nobody brave enough to speak and you simmering with anger at Suguru. You throw glare at him every time you look up from your plate which happens more times than you’d admit.  

“You got something there.” Suguru points the sharp end of the fork at you. 

“What?” You ask. 

“There,” He grabs his napkin and starts to reach for you. You tense suddenly locked in place. Suguru brings the napkin to the corner of your mouth and wipes it. “There you go.” 

You stare at him like he's grown three heads. Maybe he’s dying and wants to make amends? Why else would he be treating you like this. Maybe someone took over his body? That has to be it. 

“Uh thanks?” You mummer, unsure what to say. 

“You're welcome little sis.” You choke on your spit. What the hell did he just call you!? He must be messing with you; you’re suddenly filled with rage. You glare at him, hoping he disintegrates with the sheer force of your stare. 

“You’ve grown up.” Suguru says after another blinking contest, you lost. 

“Yea, have you?” You snarl. He stops smiling. 

“I have,” he says seriously, setting his fork down. “I want to talk about—” 

“I don’t care.” 

“Please—” 

“No!” You slam your hand on the table, and he goes silent. You’re overcome with guilt before you remember that he bullied you for a year, that he told the entire school to bully you after he graduated. Fuck him. 

— 

You slam the door the door of your room speed walking to the bathroom. You strip your clothes before turning on the tub. You finally breathe when you settle into the scolding hot water. You needed to wash his gaze, his touch, off your body. The entire dinner after your conversation was awkward, your parents didn't really speak, and you refused to glance back up at Suguru who wouldn't stop staring.  

You hated him. You hated him. You—you can’t bring yourself to hate him. For some unknown reason you can’t bring yourself to hate him despite everything he's put you through. Why? You shake your head. You don’t want to think of Suguru while you're trying to relax. You phone dings. You pick up and a smile replaces your frown. @Sssman72. 

‘How are you babydoll, you alive?’ 

‘Yes, wish I wasn’t though.’ 

‘Why what happened during dinner?’ You sigh and send him voice message detailing everything that happened. 

‘Oh wow.’ 

‘I know.’ 

‘You gonna give him a chance to explain?’ 

‘I don’t know I don’t want to but also, I want to hear his explanation...can we call I really don't want to type all of this out?’  

‘Course, give me a second. I'll call you.’ You wait a few minutes before you hear the familiar ring. 

“Hi handsome.” you smile at the blank profile. Right now, you’d do anything to see him, to hear him comfort you, to be in his arms. He could be the ugliest man in the world, you wouldn’t care. 

‘HI beautiful. Talk to me.’ He types into the chat box. 

“I don't know. like I said I want to hear him out but also, I don't want to hear it because what it it’s bad, what if it doesn’t excuse it? But also, what if it does and I feel like shit for being mean back—it's just so stressful.” 

‘I know babydoll. I wish I could be there right now and hold you. I would do anything to take that hurt away. I'm sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.’ 

“Stop, don’t apologize you didn’t do anything. If anything, I should apologize for using you as a therapist when you paid to see me naked.” You laugh. 

‘Beautiful girl—I would rather pay to hear all your problems and be able to comfort you than see you naked again.’ 

“Wow you don’t want to see me naked, I'm hurt. Just kidding, thank you for saying that handsome.” You feel your heart skip a beat at his message. Maybe you can convince him to turn his camera on tonight. 

“I kinda wanna take my mind off everything right now.” You murmur into the phone before turning on your camera. You hold it above you and smile so he can see everything.  

‘So, fucking beautiful, prettiest girl in the world. You gonna give me a show?’ 

“hm,” You use your free hand to tap your chin. “Only if you do something for me.” 

‘And what is that?’ 

‘Can you turn your camera on? And before you say no, you don’ have to show your face—maybe you can just show your dick or something else. We can masturbate on the phone, please handsome please.” You whine giving him your best puppy face. You watch as the chat bubbles disappear and reappear. You’re about to back out but all the sudden you’re looking at a dim lit room and a huge cock between a big hand. Your eyes widen and the sight. 

"Y-you probably won’t be able to type and jack off at the same time” You suck in a breath. Please turn your audio on please... 

‘I’m gonna turn my audio on but I won’t talk, okay? Think you can get off on my moans babydoll?’  

You nod. 

‘Good girl now show me that pretty pussy, make it squirt for me.’ 

You lift yourself up to sit on the corner of the tub, propping one leg on tub and spreading the other that rests in the water. You flip the camera so your mystery man can watch you finger yourself. You hear him groan and spit onto his hand. 

You moan softly at the sound, teasing your entrance. You wish he was talking to through it, but you’ll settle for this for now. One day... 

“Mmm, wish you were the one fingering me right now,” You circle your clit before gliding your fingers out your cunt. 

“Wish you were here, holding me n' fucking me.” You curl your fingers into your g-spot and moan. You look back at your phone, watching your stranger play with the tip of his long cock. It looks so big compared to his hand, you know you’ll struggle to take it. Your pussy clenches around your small fingers that do close to nothing compared to your dildos at home.  

“Wan’ your cock in me so bad, it looks so big you’ll have to force me to take it, you’ll have to hold me down and make me take it.” You cry out. You watch as he squeezes his hand up and down his cock. It looks painful. He grunts louder. 

“M’gonna cum for you handsome, m’gonna give you what you want and make a mess,” You speed up your fingers to match how fast he slides his fist up and his cock. You moan louder, thankful that you got the suite and aren’t in the room next to your stepbrothers, how embarrassing it would be if he could hear you pleasuring yourself.  

You clench harder around your fingers. Your stranger starts to grunt and groan louder. You shiver at his deep voice on the edge of cumming. 

“Please please let me cum please! Can I come for you please?” You cry, your pussy starts to squelch, spurts of liquid coming out. 

“Yes, cum for me.” Your mystery man groans in an all too familiar voice but before you have time to think about it, you’re squirting, the grip on your phone loosening and falling into the water. 

“N-no!” 

— 

“Yes, this phone is done for, your mother and I are heading into town we can try to find a company that sells phone, but you know how small towns like this are.” You stepdad stares at your phone that’s been sitting in a container full of rice since last night.  

“Fuck, I need it for work! What am I going to do?” You look up at him in distress. 

“What do you need your phone for bartending?” He looks down at you incredulously. 

“My boss is sending me some important email and I didn't bring my computer.” You lie. 

“Well, you can use Suguru’s laptop, I saw him using it this morning in the sitting room. Think he left it there before he went on his run.” Your stepdad points down the hall as your mother rounds the corner.  

“Ready to go honey?” She asks your stepdad. 

“Coming! Use Suguru laptop to check your email, if we come back and you haven’t got the email you can use my phone. Bye! Have fun and be nice!” Your stepdad waves before following your mother. You wave back. 

 Of course, you had to use Suguru’s laptop. Maybe you can just log in, tell your stranger that you’re okay and that you won’t be able to contact him until you get a new phone and then delete the history before Suguru comes back from his run. It’ll only take a few minutes...you hope he doesn’t a password.  

You run to the sitting room, but you don’t see a laptop anywhere. Dammit, he always has to make things hard for you. You walk up the round staircase and down the hall until you're standing in front of Suguru’s room. You look around, as if Suguru's gonna pop up out of nowhere and attack you from going into his room. You shake the thought off and open his door. You stop and stare at the bed, you feel like you've seen that duvet. You chalk it up to a bunch of man having the same bedding before turning to scan the room for a laptop. You quickly spot the laptop on his desk and run to it. You sigh in relief when it opens to the last tab he had opened. Thank you Suguru for not caring about who gets into your shit. You click new tab and start to type in the name of the website you use before you freeze.  

You only need to type in three letters before the website popped up in top hits. You stop breathing. No... He couldn’t know what you do. Is that why he came here? Was he going to expose you to your parents? Was he acting nice to butter you up before crushing you? Your vision starts to blur. All boys watch porn, maybe he just happens to watch porn on the same website you film on. You can block your account from him so that he never finds you. You swallow before clicking the tab. You shakily move they pointer over to the search bar before you spot something in the left corner that makes you dizzy.  

Right where the username of the viewer is supposed to be is the username @Sssman72. Your heart stops and you feel wetness hit your hands. This can’t be real. You move to chat and cry out when you see your username. The last text he sent was asking what happened. No—this is a dream; you’re going to wake up and this is going to be a bad nightmare. You refuse to believe the man you’ve been slowly falling in love with over the last six months is your stepbrother, your bully. The man you confessed all your darkest secrets is the man who never showed you an ounce of kindness. Is this a part of his master plan? Is he going to blackmail you and hold all the nudes you’ve sent him and all the secrets you’ve told him over your head. You’re going to become his slave, doing whatever he wants of you until you die. You curl into yourself and cry harder at the thought.  

“Y/n? What are you do—” Suguru stops when he sees what's on the screen. “Let me explain please baby.” He reaches out to touch your shoulder. You flinch away from his touch.  

“D-don’t call me that,” You sob staring at him with such heartbreak in your eyes he wants to drop and beg for your forgiveness. “You-you, it was you the whole time.” Your voice breaks. 

Suguru nods slowly trying to reach out for you again. You take a few steps away. “Was this some masterplan to hold me under your thumb for the rest of my life!?” You scream at him. 

He’s grateful your parents went out of town; this would be an absolute shitshow if they were here.  

“No babydoll—” 

“I said don’t call me that you asshole! Stop pretending. I hate you Suguru! You win okay, you win!” You tell him before you run out of his room. He curses before running after you, you run up that stairs and into the suite but before you can shut the door Suguru shoves it open. You drop to your knees to pull your suitcase from under your bed. 

“Please listen to me y/n. I wasn’t faking—stop packing and let me explain.” Suguru pleads as he watches you throw your clothes into your suitcase. 

“Y/n, baby, please listen to me please” He grabs your arm, and you try to fight him, but he pulls you down onto the bed with him. He hugs you around the waist and you push in this chest trying to break free. His heart aches. He hates seeing you hurt, he hates that he was the one who made you cry like this. He hates that you only associate him with the version of himself that he created to stop anyone from seeing what he was truly feeling. He hates that you won’t accept the real version of him now that you know it was him. He holds you tighter as you scream and cry. He whispers sweet nothings as you whisper how much you hate him. At some point you stop fighting and wrapping your arms around his neck. You sniffle into his neck, and he rubs your backs and rocks you.  

“Why?” You ask hoarsely after all the anger leaves your body. Now you feel numb, like you're watching your life from a third perspective.   

“I never hated you, I never lied, and I never planned to blackmail you—I know you don’t believe me baby but everything I've ever told you on that app was real. Everything I feel for you is real.”   You pull your face out of his neck and stare up at him. You don’t believe him. 

“I have never hated you y/n. I swear it. I hated the fact that my father replaced my mother with yours not even a year after she died. Baby, I never fucking hated you. I was just a teenager who didn’t know how to express my emotions so I took them out of the person I knew I could hurt the most. It was bad I know; I feel like shit to this day. When I graduated and got away from my father, I realized how bad I was to you, and I got into therapy. I wanted to be better for myself, for you, for everyone around me. I didn’t know that the bullying continued when I left. I didn’t know how bad people had taken it until that day I came back home. When you told me off about it, I was so confused. I’m so fucking sorry. I want to reach out and apologize for everything and the day I planned to do it Satoru—my best friend, you remember him—well he sent me the link to your account and so I made an account and it all just spiralized out of control after that. I was too embarrassed to tell you it was me and then we started to form a connection, a real connection, and I didn’t want our conversations to end so—fuck I'm sorry. Everything I told you; I meant it. I fucking meant every word.”  

You sit there stunned, trying to comprehend everything he said. You never knew about his mother. You thought she had passed away long before your mom and his dad had met. But you remember when your stranger told you that. God, you remember when your not so mystery man told you about his family the seemed so familiar to yours. And he didn’t tell all those people to bully you after he left? Did he mean every word? Every word of affirmation he gave you. Those times when he told you that you were capable of being loved and that you were going to find someone who would love every part of you, the good and bad. Was that the same Suguru? You try to wrap your mind around the fact that the man you love is your stepbrother. 

“I know it’s a lot of information.” 

“It is.” 

“Do you believe me?” He looks at you with furrowed brows. You do. Despite everything you find yourself nodding. He sighs and you feel the tension release from his shoulders that your arms are wrapped around. You suddenly realize the position you two are in and feel your face heat. Your arms are wrapped around his neck and your legs are on either side of his thick thighs his cock, the cock that you saw last night, is right underneath you, if you lower yourself an inch, you’d be sitting on it.  

Suguru grips your waist with one hand, the other cupping the right side of your face. You look up at him and sniffle. He leans down until your foreheads are touching.  

“If you give me achance, I'll treat you like the queen you are. I’ll love you the way you’re meant to be loved. One chance is all I ask for.” He mummers rubbing your noses together.  

You hesitate, one part of you wants to run away with him because he’s the man you’ve wanted for the last six months. The other part of you wants to run away from him, he’s your stepbrother, he lied, and you don't know if he would’ve ever told you the truth. But isn’t that what he came here to do? Can you blame a little boy for being mad at the people who replaced his mother?  

You give him his answer by grabbind his neck and push his lips towards you. If this does go to hell at least you’ll have a story to tell your feature children.  

Suguru kisses back before standing and pulling you off him. “What—” 

“You said you wanted me on my knees, didn't you? I’m ready to serve you in any way you want. I can have my savings transferred to your account by tomorrow night.” He says as he drops to his knees. You stare at him with wide eyes as he holds your legs and starts kissing from knee to right where your pussy starts.  

“Suguru—” 

“Shh babydoll let me take care of my girl, show her how sorry I am for hurting her.” He mummers before dropping your leg and picking up the next one. He repeats this a few more times before finally asking you to lift your hips so he can pull your leggings and panties off. Suguru throws your pants behind him before standing up to pull your tank top off. You reach behind to unbuckle your bra and toss it on the floor with your other clothes. Suguru chuckles, reaching up to kiss all over your face. 

“Take your clothes off too Sugu.” You giggle, reaching for his sweatpants. You get a firm grip and yank them down. His thick cock bounces out. Your mouth goes slack. The phone call didn’t do it justice. It somehow looks bigger than before and if you weren’t wet before, you are now. That thing is going to be inside you soon.  

“Like what you see beautiful?” You nod dumbly as you watch Suguru step out of his pants and take his shirt off with one hand. He’s so fucking sexy.  

He drops back down to his knees and pulls you until your ass is hanging off the bed. “Lay down and let me please you.”  You comply and watch as Suguru lifts your legs up and buries his face in your cunt. Your hands fly down to his long shiny hair. 

“Suguru!” You moan as he licks you from asshole to clit. He sucks on your clit before biting both lips. Your pussy clenches. “Feels s’good Sugu!” You grind down on his talented tongue. Suguru hums into your clit before setting one of you thighs in his shoulder and bringing his fingers to your entrance. He teases you, only pushing his fingers into the joint before taking them out. You cry out in frustration before pulling on his long hair when he finally slides two big fingers into you. 

Yours definitely don't compare to his long thick ones. Your back arches off the bed as Suguru fingers jackhammer into you all the while his mouth sucks on your clit.  

“S’good Sugu! Don’t stop!” You scream letting go of hair with one hand to cover your loud mouth.  

“Don’t hide those sweet moans from me babydoll. If you want my cock, you’ll let me hear you scream my name as you cum on my fingers and mouth.” 

You bring you hand back to hair and grind hard as you get closer and closer to orgasm.  

“Gonna cum! M’gonna come!” You cry, as you release all over Suguru's face. He moans and sucks even harder before adding another finger. You cry at the sudden intrusion. It doesn't take long before you’re coming all over again, this time liquid shooting out of you and onto Sugu’s chest.  

“Yes baby, that's it—what a good girl,” He praises as he slurps up all your juices. “Such a fucking good gril f’me.” 

“Gimme a kiss.” You say between heavy breaths.  

“Does the pretty girl want kiss?” You nod, pulling Suguru down with you by the shoulders. 

“Want you to kiss me while you fuck me for the first time. Want it to be special,” You confess shyly. Suguru leans down and pecks you on the forehead, then the nose, and then both of your cheeks. 

“Don’ tease meanie!” You laugh when he kisses the corner of your lips. 

“M’sorry baby, can you forgive me?” He pouts.  

“Hmm—I’ll forgive you only if you kiss me right no—” You don’t even finish your sentence before Suguru shoves his tongue down your throat. You kiss him back and your tongues fight for dominance. Suguru wins and smiles into the kiss. You can’t believe this is happening. Your bully, your stepbrother, your mystery man is kissing you right now. Your about to make love with said man. 

“You okay babydoll?”  

“Mhm, just can’t believe this is all happening.” 

“Me too beautiful, you sure you want to do this right now? We can always wait.” 

“No, I want to. I want you.” You raise your hand to tuck his hair behind his ear. He smiles, showing you that adorable dimple. You kiss it.  

Suguru kisses your lips once more before he grabs his cock, rubbing it up and down your cunt. 

“Fuck—I don’t have a condom.” 

“I’m on the pill—please Sugu.” You beg, frustrated from all this foreplay. You’ve been on edge since last tight in the tub.  

“Alight beautiful,” He pushes the head of his cock into you. “Fuck me—you feel so good. Always knew you would.” You feel his fist guide his long cock into you. You moan. He fits you perfectly.  

“Sugu—feel’s s’good, want more!” You cry, fisting the blanket’s underneath you.  

“Does my baby want more—does she want to orgasm on my cock?” You nod watching Suguru lift your legs to his shoulder. He leans down, bringing your feet to the side of your head. You whine at the stretch. 

Suguru groans as he pulls his cock in and out of you.  

“S’too much!” You moan into his shoulder. He just laughs and picks up his pace. The fancy headboard above the bed starts to slam against the wall. You watch with blurry eyes as the stock photos hung on the wall shake.  

“Said you wanted more baby, ‘m giving you more.”  he says before biting into your neck. Hard. You scream, back arching at the pain. Your hands fist the sheets even tighter, knuckles turning white. Suguru unlatches his jaw. Lifting his head to admire his mark. Now all your customers will know you belong to someone. To him. He kisses the mark. 

“Sugu, It’s too much. Hurts! m’gonna cum!” You cry, tears soaking the blanket breath you. 

“Oh, don't cry baby—shhh—you’re so beautiful y/n. So damn pretty.” He whispers, coaxing you to orgasm. Your eyes roll to the back of your head. You stop breathing for a second as your pussy contracts around Suguru's cock. Suguru follows in suit, spurting his cum deep inside your pussy. 

“Fuck,” he draws out, collapsing onto you.  

“T-that was—” 

“The best sex ‘ve ever had.” 

“Same.” You smile before wincing. 

“What’s wrong babydoll.”  

“You're about to break my damn hip if you keep my legs up any longer,” Suguru lefts himself enough to bring your legs to his sides. “And you probably ripped a chunk of my neck off with that little trick of yours.” You grumble. 

“It’s not bad, promise.” He kisses the bite mark softly. 

“And all the pictures fell of the wall.”  

“I’ll put ‘em back up baby,” He laughs into your ear. “Just let me hold you for a second.”  He kisses your cheek before snuggling deeper into you. You throw your arms around his shoulder while you both try to wrap your head around everything that happened.  

[leah-lover]

Second chances. Alexia putellas x coach!reader.

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.

summary : the confrontation between alexia and R.

Alexia always had a hold on you. Her stare would often captivate you and suck the air out of each room you were in. being stuck with her in the physio room, her muscular thighs on full display, was your worst nightmare. Her eyes seemed to devour every part of you and yours couldnt shy away from doing the same. There you both were 4 years after that night still looking at each other like nothing mattered in the world but the person in front of you. Your heart made it  its purpose to quickly remind you of the gaping hole she left in it. You remembered the amount of tears she drew from your eyes, and the delay she caused to your success and career. You shifted in your seat and looked away from her. You reminded yourself that the person in front of you wasn't  the love of your life anymore but the one that destroyed you. 

“ You don't know how many times I imagined us talking like this. I planned this speech many times but now that i have to do it i can't recall a word.” she says breaking the silence. Her voice was shaky which wasn't something you were used to. You hardly ever saw alexia nervous and fidgety which was interesting to witness. You didn't say a word though. You kept your composure as you always did and let her speak her mind. 

“ uhmm. I am sorry. I know that i fucked up really badly. I shouldn't have acted like that that night. I should have fought for you. Fought for us. I should have reprimanded Irene and done everything in my power to help keep us together but I was a coward. I chose the easy road. You don't know how sorry I am. I regret everything and if  I could go back I would stop you from leaving or leave with you.” 

You fantasized many times about what alexia would say if she was to apologize. What you dreamt of sounded like what she said but coming from her it didn't sound as satisfying as would have hoped. It  only made you angrier. You tried to keep your composer because it was your default setting. Your face was as emotionless as you could have it but your blood was boiling in your veins. You waited for her to add something but she didn't. . she was shaking and her eyes were glued on you. 

Realizing that she was done you got up to leave. She quickly hurried to your side. “ So you won't say anything?” she asked, nervousness clear in her voice. “ I said I would hear you out and I did.”  you respond with a monotone voice. 

“ Please say something.” she pleaded. 

“ What do you want me to say? You want me to say that you are forgiven. You are not. You destroyed me and for that I will hate you forever.” 

“ You don't mean that.” 

“ I don't mean what? The part where I said you destroyed me or the part where I said I hate you.” your voice was undermining and insulting which made her body visibly tense. 

“ I was in love with you and you chose you before me. You chose your career before me. You chose your family and friends before me. And what?  you think i am sorry and I regret everything would make me forgive you and come back to you.” you voice and body language were cruel. You laughed at her, undermined her presence and belittled her just with your tone. You saw her shrink before your eyes. You didn't mean to or maybe you did. But the image in front of you made your heart ripe.

“ I was dead without you. I couldnt breath, sleep, or eat. I thought that you would come after me and tell me that I am to you worth more than some stupid trophies or a legacy. I thought that you wanted to continue your life with me and that that night was just a mistake But you didn't. You left me alone and unemployed. You ruined me. You broke me. I had to learn how to breathe again. I had to learn how to sleep in my bed alone. I had to train my brain not to think about you  and not to try and hold out hope that you wanted me. You made me feel unloved and undeserving of everything.” you saw tears escape her eyes and stain red cheeks. 

“ I am stupid. I don't deserve you or  a second chance. But I can't help but miss you and need you. All I have is this stupid job and my memories of you. I replay them every night before I go to bed. I replay how my lips  felt on yours and how your head felt on my chest.  I should have come after you and told you that I love you more than anything but my ambition stood in the way. I thought that my career and the approval of my family  would fill the void in my heart but I was wrong. I love you. “ 

You two stood there with your hearts laid bare. You know how she felt and she knew how you felt. 

“ After all this time I love you too alexia.” you took a deep breath and you saw her eyes light up. “ But I can't trust you. I went through so much pain and anger. I don't think that I am capable of moving past it to be with you.” you swiped her tears away with your thumbs and gave her a quick peck on her lips. She didn't fight back, she wanted more but you stepped away from her and left the room. 

As soon as the door closed behind you tears streamed down your face as you ran away from the hallway. 

You were the last one to board the bus. You saw a glimpse of alexia whose head was lying on mapi's shoulder. Her eyes were puffy, her cheeks were red and your heart was no longer able to keep your feelings for her dormant. Two voices were screaming at you. One was reminding you of how much you love her and the other reminding you of how much she hurt you. You put on your headphones to try and drown out the noise that tortured you. 

Midnight found you awake, the image of alexia’s crying face was burned into your memory. A knock on your door stopped you from cursing yourself for thinking about going back to her. When you opened the door you found Irene in front of you. 

“ Can I come in?” she asked. You stepped aside to let her in. 

“ I am a jerk.” she stated. “ Yeah you are.” you responded. 

 “ You haven't done anything to hurt me but I have done everything to hurt you. I was young, jealous, and angry. Everything that happened was on me and it was my fault. And for that I apologize. I knew that night that it would hurt you and get you to leave so I did it. I was a child jealous that her best friend found love and she didn't. I am not excusing my behavior which was wrong. I am giving you a much needed apology.” 

“ Thank you.” you respond. 

“ alexia loves you. She is deeply in love with you.” 

“ Irene, stop.” you interrupt her. 

“ She truly loves you and she truly is sorry for everything. She would do anything to be with you again. She was a mess when you left. That's why I didn't want you to take the job. I knew how much she had gone through and how much she still loves you. And when I looked at you I saw that you too still loved her. In  an effort to save my friend I was rude to you. Hate me but please try to find the will to forgive her.” 

You didn't know what to do with what she told you. Your heart was burning for Alexia and you knew now that hers yearned for you too. 

You pick up your phone and look at her contact. Will you forgive her or shut her out again?

[the-s1lly-corner]

Cuddling w/ Various Creepypastas 1/2

Notes: some characters have shorter sections but that's mostly due to me already writing cuddling hcs for said character! Reader is GN, this entire post can be read as either platonic or romantic! Save for the usual characters I dont write romantic for. Depending on the reception of this post I might do a part two with other characters.. do feel free to ask for anyone specific who wasn't in this post!

Characters: Slenderman, Splendorman, Eyeless Jack, Laughing Jack, Masky, Hoodie, Jeff the Killer

SLENDERMAN

Physical affection with slenderman is fairly rare. Sure, he gives you the mock kiss every now and then and might even snake a tendril around you to pull you close to him if you start straying in the woods... but to actually cuddle? Good luck with that! Though.. I feel it would be likely in a moment of much needed comfort- perhaps you're sick or you just point blank ask him to hold you.. hes cold, and you can feel bones but you dont care all that much. Hes stiff as a board, though. By default hes the big spoon, will likely never be the little spoon ever. Sometimes wraps his tentacles around you if you need to get even closer 4/10 because I love him but cuddling with him would be so so rare

SPLENDORMAN

Runs more on the warmer side! Loves being the big spoon, and of course hes very tall! Sometimes hums when you two lean into one another. Rocks you too as well, if you ask him to. Very touch starved so he attempts to seek you out every now and then.. not very soft though thanks to being very thin. He likes carrying you around! Hope you're not afraid of heights! 8/10

EYELESS JACK

I've mentioned a few times that hes very cold to the touch.. like ice cold. So unless you're into that, cuddling him might be a little.. hmm.. not that some blankets cant fix though! My headcanon is that hes on the shorter side, but kind of chubby buff. Soft! Switches between being little and big spoon. Hes not too keen in physical touch so you're going to have to wait for him to initiate.. I'm biased but I give him a solid 7/10

LAUGHING JACK

In contrast to the other Jack, Laughing Jack is actually pretty warm! It's like snuggling up into a heated blanket! His torso isnt very soft, but the puffs on his shoulders are nice and soft- as are his arms! And he purrs so that just makes it more relaxing! Switches between being big and little spoon, he doesnt seem to show much of a preference! Hes a total cuddle bug, if he could he would be snuggled up against you all day every day! 9/10, and hes very large! 8 feet tall is his default! Loves snaking his arms around you

MASKY

Adverse to touch, mostly in the beginning of your relationship (whether platonic or romantic, it doesnt matter), so its best to leave the initiation to him. Even then he rarely seeks you out. Unlike some of the other characters, outright asking him to cuddle you for comfort wont.. work.. the most you'll get is him rubbing circles into your back while he sits next to you. On the rare occasion that he does pull you against him, hes pretty warm. More so than Hoodie but not as hot as LJ. Firm grip but you can tell he doesn't know where to put his hands. Incredibly stiff against you, 5/10 hes doing his best :(

HOODIE

Tall and strong, and his hoodie is very soft when you convince him to let you wash it. If he takes his mask off his facial hair can get a little itchy, but it's rare that the mask is off. Loves being big spoon but sometimes craves being little spoon sometimes. Smells like... leaves and campfire smoke. Not bad, actually. Loves drumming his fingers on you 8/10

JEFF

Very lanky and tall, string bean build basically. Average body temperature. Does not like cuddling; probably sees most acts of physical affection as "yucky" regardless of if they're romantic or not. The closest you're going to get is the two of you huddling together for warmth or something within that ballpark. His skins a little rough, but that's too be expected. Very tense throughout the entire interaction, 2/10 he does not make a good cuddle buddy

[kanencrow]

Bold and Breathless - Natalie Scatorccio | One Shot

Summary: When hunting with Natalie turns into a game of who's the better shooter, you find yourself kissing her on a whim of confidence (basically just a rewrite of that scene between Natalie and Travis, except it's you taking his place).

Warnings: Kissing, Swearing, Talks/Descriptions of Periods.

A/N: All characters are 18+ by default. Implied afab!reader, but can be interpreted however you want. Also, this is my first post about Yellowjackets, and I've had this drafted in my Google Docs for, like... almost a year, so enjoy!

Word Count: 2300+

Your finger teased the trigger of the rifle in your arms while your pupils flickered about the forest, taking in the scenery and what it carried. All you could see was the lush life of greenery and trees, but when it came to animals of any kind, the signs of them were few and far between. The plush of your cheek used the wooden buttstock as its personal resting place as you gripped the outstretching barrel of the weapon, and you could feel the presence of Natalie right behind you. Although her existence reminded you that you weren't alone, it only increased your embarrassment, due to the fact that you and her were competing against each other, for the sake of making the act of hunting less melancholic.

It wasn't often that you allowed your patience to waver. Though, after a moment longer with nothing showing itself as a feasible target, you quietly huffed and lowered the rifle down, as you deflated into the curved tree you used as your own personal perch. Frustration bloomed, like a wave of heat washing over you, and Natalie noticed your attitude, when she approached you from your left and sighed knowingly as she crinkled the piece of paper she held between her fingers. "Ah, giving up makes sense," she muttered. Her voice was low, which emphasized the raspiness of her natural tone, and you slowly turned your head to meet her eyes with a deadpan that was directed towards her. "You're too far behind to ever catch up."

You turned your body and rested your back up against the tree as you continued to stare at her. She held a cocky smirk on her lips, and although you wanted to show your frustration towards her egotistical nature, you couldn't bring yourself to say anything close to a quip. All you could do was shrug your shoulders and look down at the rifle you cradled in your arms. "Is saying that I'm on my period a valid excuse for my suckiness right now?" you questioned thoughtfully, your eyebrows furrowing in wonder.

"Nope," Natalie replied, her lips popping the 'P' in the word she spoke. You gave her what you could only describe as a pout in response to her denial, and she mockingly frowned at you, but there was still that added affection you could sense coming from the action. "We're synced up, so whatever you're feeling, I'm probably feeling it too," she stated, which made your features scrunch up into a grimace, hating the concept of periods as a whole. The Midol you took in the morning lessened the intense cramps you always got on the first day. You made sure to give your hunting partner one too when she first woke up this morning.

She seemed awfully chipper for someone who was bleeding from the inside, though.

You were a little envious of her.

You let out an almost mute groan when the corkscrew of a cramp spread throughout your lower abdomen. The singular pill clearly hadn't done much for your annoying symptoms, and Natalie seemed to recognize that when her eyes glanced down to the rifle in your arms. She noted the way you clutched it tighter for a moment, which caused your muscles to tense, before you eventually loosened your hold on the gun and let out a fleeting huff that conveyed whatever discomfort you were feeling had passed.

"Where's Travis?" you asked unconsciously, suddenly moving on from the earlier topic you and she shared, while you settled the rifle down and leaned it up against the bark beside you. "He's not experiencing debilitating cramps right now. He should be doing this shit," you muttered grumpily, which earned a chuckle from the blonde, as she stepped forward slightly, lessening the distance between the two of you.

"I, uh... kinda just wanted it to be us this time," Natalie muttered, her voice quiet. You lifted your eyes to connect them with her own, and while she stared at you through her lashes, fidgeting with the piece of paper in her hands, you felt your stomach flutter with an appreciative sensation. One that filled you with warmth and excitement, rather than the usual discomfort you had been feeling for the majority of the day. "He's... somewhere, doing... something." She brought her hand up and waved it carelessly, and although the statement was somewhat worrisome, you laughed.

It was a sound that brought a grin to Natalie's cheeks, when she lifted her chin to level her gaze with your own. You shook your head in amusement, appreciating the comical nature, whether or not she intended for it to be such, as you leaned down to blindly grab the barrel of the rifle. "That's romantic," you mused, the tone of your voice containing a gentleness to it that conveyed to the girl in front of you that you appreciated her intentions. You settled the gun in your arms after a moment, and she watched you sheepishly as you pushed away from the tree and moved in close to her, creating an irrevocable display of intimacy that caused her breath to catch in her throat, while her pupils flickered down to glance at your lips. "Guess we can call this a date."

Natalie felt her stomach flutter when you shifted slightly to traverse forward. Your lips almost touched her own in the movement, but you managed to keep the moment from happening when you passed her by and continued on with the intention of finding another area to hunt. She felt warmth ease its way up her neck and onto her cheeks as she followed you soon after, and while she watched you like a hawk – flustered and shocked by your boldness – you shared the same sentiment towards yourself. Your own skin was hot, and you only hoped that it didn't visibly mark you with the emotion of embarrassment and surprise towards your own actions, which portrayed confidence you didn't even realize you had.

Though luckily, she didn't see your self-assured attitude shatter into two.

————————————————————————

You could feel the grass brush against the bare skin of your arms while you laid on the forest floor. You cradled the rifle in your palms, the barrel of the weapon settled against the moss-covered log you used as a perch, while Natalie's sitting form lingered to your left. She watched you intently as you focused on an unsuspecting gopher. The little creature chewed on a piece of brush, and just as your finger eased down onto the trigger, you heard the vibration of a sharp click emit from the gun, signifying that no bullet lied in the chamber. Immediately, your head perked up with an expression of dumbfounded confusion lining your features, and you pulled your focus away from the iron sights, as you brought your hand down to tug the lever.

You were greeted with the vacant space that usually contained some sign of ammunition. "What the fuck..." your lips parted in shock, just as you heard Natalie giggle from beside you. Her laughter caused you to shift your body and look over at her amused state, and it didn't take long before she lifted her hand up to show you the bullet that was meant to be sitting in the chamber of the rifle. "You fuckin' cheater!" you quietly exclaimed, while an open-mouthed grin formed on your cheeks. You gawked at her, a feeling of amazement swirling within your chest towards her lighthearted joke. She bit her lip to try and suppress her own amusement towards your reaction, but it was clear as day that she thought what she had done was hilarious.

"All is fair in love and war," Natalie told you, though you could only furrow your eyebrows in response to her statement, as you pushed yourself up from your lain position and sat on the back of your heels. Your eyes flickered about her face, taking in her pallid features earnestly, but your own expression made her think you were offended by her actions, especially when you didn't put in the effort to respond. It only caused her comical nature to dwindle slightly, as she rolled the bullet into her palm and closed her fingers around it, creating a fist that protected the piece of ammunition. "I had to come up with a way to get you to lose," she explained sheepishly, after a moment, "I can't let you win."

"You can't let me win?" you repeated, your tone completely lighthearted and pertaining no malice. You shook your head dismissively, still amused by the plan she had gone with in order to prevent you from having a victory. "I see how it is," you uttered, though the statement was more so directed towards yourself, as you shifted closer to her and attempted to grab her wrist that was connected to the hand that held the bullet. However, just as your fingers brushed against her skin, she pulled her arm away from you, which forced your eyes to flicker away from her fist and back up to her, meeting her gaze. "You not gonna let me have the bullet back?" you questioned her.

Natalie shook her head silently, and her quiet response forced a subtle groan from you that sounded more like a low whine. The sound automatically amused the blonde in turn, and just as she let her guard down to bellow a laugh at your feigned defeat, you shot your hands forward and grabbed her wrist with one – keeping it from retreating, as your other squeezed between her curled fingers and snatched the bullet from her grasp. "Hey!" she called, but you had already shuffled away from her and clutched the singular piece of munition to your chest, staring at her as though you were some feral squirrel who had found their prized acorn.

"Don't 'hey' me," you retorted with a giggle, as Natalie pushed herself up onto her knees to crawl towards you. Her gaze had suddenly darkened, like she was on a mission to take back what she saw as hers, which forced a nervous laugh to slip from your lips, as your grip around the bullet tightened.

"Give me the bullet," she told you.

"Hell no." You shook your head in response, and Natalie rolled her eyes at your answer, her hands shifting to rest against the ground to keep herself steady. Her palms sat on either side of your body, which had lessened the proximity between the two of you, and you only realized such when she let out a breath that gently hit against the skin of your nose. All sense of amusement vanished from you at the recollection, and she shared a similar expression of surprise when her pupils fluttered down to take in the finer details of your face. She didn't push away from you, however. And you took her lack of repression as a sign to act on the impulse you felt nagging away at you.

Before you could truly dictate whether or not it was a bad idea, you raised your hand up to gently take hold of Natalie's jaw. Your fingers lightly squeezed her face, as you pulled her down to mold your lips against her own. Your eyes closed tightly as she moaned against your mouth, and you felt a surge of anxiety suddenly flourish through your stomach, which caused you to pull back from her, acknowledging the boundary you had trespassed without her consent. "I'm sorry, Nat–" Your attempt to apologize to her was swiftly cut off, when she lifted her palm up and wrapped it around your neck to tug you back into her.

Natalie initiated the kiss that time, and you felt the nervousness the moment brought you slowly fade away. You melted into her, internally appreciating the way the heel of her palm lightly pressed against the column of your throat, as her fingers kept a light grasp of your jawline. It forced your head to nudge into the bark of the tree that you leaned up against. But you didn't mind it, as she moved to straddle you without you fully realizing it. When the weight of her body rested on your lap, you moaned into her mouth without warning and moved your hands down to knead her hips while you tugged her closer, holding them with a firmness that she seemed to appreciate when she squeezed your skin.

The both of you got lost in the moment, and only when a distant crackle of wildlife sounded off in the distance, did you and Natalie part from each other. You let out a gasp, one that conveyed you had been in need of air for a good while, and she made a similar sound as she dropped her hand from your neck and planted it against your collarbone to brace herself, all while her other mindlessly moved up to rest against the tree beside your head. Your eyes fluttered open shortly after, blissed out and baffled from what had happened, and when your gaze eventually met with her own, her lips were parted, but a giddy grin was apparent while she stared down at you.

"You're… a lot bolder than I thought."

Her statement carried a tone of endearment to it. And all you could do in response was sheepishly shrug, as if you didn't know what had come over you. Truly, you didn't. Maybe it was the wilderness that encouraged you to live without worry and the fear of being dragged down by your natural shyness. Maybe it was simply her that forced another side of you to come out. One that was carefree and willing to do whatever without the concern of getting in trouble. Whatever it was, you liked it, and it was clear that she did too. Especially when her eyes roved over your form one last time, before she eventually pulled herself away from you.

It was an action that caused butterflies to flourish throughout your stomach, while she tugged you up to your feet and pulled you along, as though she hadn't just been on top of you and stolen your breath away.

Give me your thoughts/requests! Thanks for reading! <3

[mrghostrat]

Hello and good morning/day/night :]

I was wondering, in BNF, we’ve gotten tiny little bits of information about the ‘Nice and Accurate Prophecies’ (not sure if that’s the correct title, sorry) book and TV series, if there was anything else you could tell us about it?

Character names, storylines, plots, any fun details you may have made up or otherwise, etc, etc.

I just think it’s sweet how interested both Aziraphale and Crowley are in the series, and if you might be as interested, if not more, in it too.

Thank you, and have a lovely Sunday. 🫶

this is it, my leash has snapped, i'm wild in the streets, thank u for asking; i'm gonna go be insufferable now

(hi @neil-gaiman if you see this, i think it's safe to read, but it does border on being fan fic. i'm writing a fic where crowley and aziraphale are an artist + writer in an online fandom, much like we are for good omens, and this is the fake story i've made for them to be fans of 💛)

The Nice and Accurate Prophecy

info dump of the fake 5 book series by Agnes Nutter (1985-1992) and its fake fandom:

The Nice and Accurate Prophecy

The Strange and Improbable Prophecy

The Vague and Perfidious Prophecy

The Tense and Harrowing Prophecy

The Faint and Ineffable Prophecy

a dramatic, layered story with a bizarre and unexpectedly lovable cast of characters, humour that hits you out of nowhere, and a lot of attitude from the narrator. a la Good Omens, A Series of Unfortunate Events, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy

fantasy/historical fantasy and mildly action & romance

a la good omens, a witch and a witchfinder become friends and help each other throughout history, despite being on opposite sides. they get closer as they fight against the immoral plays from their prospective sides (the witchfinder army and a demonic cult the witch was born into) that each lose sight of their core values in a bid to hold more power over the world.

the story is set primarily in a medieval fantasy era, but suddenly jumps to the present in the later books, catching everyone off guard and giving a whole new context to enjoy the story. the challenges they face parallel the earlier story but in a modern take with modern technological twists. the modern era is the late 80s, since that's when it was written.

the witch reincarnates, similar to doctor who, due to a high class black magic ritual they performed in their arrogant youth (which they were NOT supposed to have access to). they've had long lifetimes where they die of old age, and others where they've barely managed to live a year. their reincarnations aren't entirely random; they will reincarnate according to their growth and preferences as a person (a la Magical Boy's magical outfit generations), which includes fluctuation in gender identity. their pronouns fluctuate depending on each "face" they wear, but have canonically been a "they" before. the good side of the fandom (crowley & aziraphale) default to they/them as an overall rule. they do have a name, but they like to change that too, so the fandom almost exclusively calls them witch, or witchy.

the witchfinder also has a name, but the fandom have taken to calling him witchfinder to match the fact that witchy is called by their role. it also helps that a lot of the witchfinder narration refers to him by role instead of name. he is human, 30ish in appearance, but at the end of the first book, the witch fears to lose him and curses him with immortality against his knowledge to try and keep him safe.

witch is crowley-coded, witchfinder is aziraphale-coded. my to-do list includes an illustration of the two of them played by michael and david :') but i picture them being kind of like newt and anathema for the most part.

ship names include witch/finder, witchwitch, w² or witch², and witchfound.

at the start of the first book, they meet and become friends without knowing each other is a witch & finder. the witchfinder is a bit bumbly, like newt, and the witch is cool and suave but neurotic and insecure like many human au variations of crowley (major overcompensation vibes). witch is male at the start of the first book. their friendship is secure when witch finds out he's a witchfinder, so there's less "oh my god i'm friends with the enemy, is he going to kill me in my sleep?" and more "ah fuck, Lets Drink About This"

there's battles, horseback riding, camping out in dark woods, disappearing and losing each other for months at a time, and many missed connections as they try to work together against two common enemies, whilst keeping up the facade that they're on their respective team's sides.

there's charged chemistry in the first book, but it's more plot heavy. there's hints of shippy moments in the 2nd book that fall in between the plot. there's a Moment of almost confession in the 3rd book, and a non romantic kiss towards the end (we gotta, for neil). they're pretty much married in the 4th book, securely at each other's side, but never actually talk about it until the end, and there's a more explicitly stated shippy connection in the 5th book.

agnes herself is a total recluse who drops books out of nowhere then goes back to existing somewhere in the english countryside (people presume). she's happy to supply signed copies to fundraisers and conventions, and sometimes random bookshops across the country will be vandalised with genuine autographs on the inside covers. she's notoriously pedantic about being involved with adaptions behind the scenes, but she has no social media and isn't ~around~. she once did a talk when she was presented with an honorary doctorate, and did a single book signing when the first Prophecy book came out, but beyond that she keeps to herself.

there are a small handful of quotes from her in behind-the-scenes footage talking vaguely about character intensions and clarifying world building, but she likes to leave things up to interpretation like neil does. it's in these few snippets of interaction we've seen from her that she's steadfastly supportive of intersectionality and lgbt rights, like staring dead-eyed at an interviewer when they ask her a ridiculously heteronormative question about the characters (like "have you read my books?")

adaptions include:

(most adaptions start like the book, with a male witch at the beginning that turns into a female witch when they first regenerate. the early ones usually change the pacing by switching to a female actor by the time they realise witchfinder is a witchfinder, unlike in the book where he's male for this scene, and there's way less Charged™ chemistry between the m/m witch/finder.)

Feature Film: late 90s, kind of cheesy, but good spirited fantasy (a la Indiana Jones). focuses on the first book alone, with hints to a sequel that never happened.

Abandoned TV Pilot: early 2000s, a little too dramatic but still a good time (a la the Dungeons and Dragons 2000, ASOUE 2004). good source of gifs and Moments™ but the fandom is generally Fine with it being abandoned.

Stage Performance: late 2000s-early 2010s, a stellar stage adaption of the first book with elements of the 90s movie. f/m witch/finder the whole way through. one cast used m/m actors but it was a short run and only a handful of fans were lucky enough to catch or remember it. crowley would give his left arm (or someone's, anyway) to have experienced it, so a fan sent him some flip phone camera footage of it that he keeps on a harddrive in his safe.

HBO Streaming Series: late 2010s-present, high quality, highly revered, resurged the fandom's popularity and spread the series further overseas. made in america, but doesn't try to americanise the series. extremely respectful to the books, with easter eggs to the film, and is working its way through the entire book series (a la The Witcher netflix series). f/m witch/finder, but has had one episode that included some flash backs/montages of different witch faces. probably like 15 minutes total screentime of a male witch played by a ncuti gatwa level/style of actor, which the fandom has giffed, edited, and screencapped to oblivion.

Several bonus books: Agnes has written a few extra books (a la The Unauthorized Autobiography of Lemony Snicket and The Beatrice Letters), as well as curated some anthologies from other authors (a la A Study In Sherlock). there are a total of 3 anthologies so far, in which other authors have written stories about the characters in their own tellings. basically like canonised, published fan fiction, curated and authorised by agnes herself. There's also an unfinished graphic novel that retells the book series (a la The Adventure Zone comic), but has been WIP/unheard of since the 3rd book.

[dronebiscuitbat]

Oil is Thicker Then Blood (Part 79)

Uzi was sitting on the couch, burying her face in an aeronautical engineering book for the umpteenth time. Sketching out ideas for heat shielding on a notepad, Tera on her lap, inquisitivly watching her mother draw and holding onto her bat plushie.

If she was being honest with herself (which, of course she wasn't) she would admit that it was somewhat difficult now for Tera to sit on her lap like she used to, her baby bump was now fairly obvious, she could still… somewhat, hide it underneath her hoodie, but even then if someone was paying close enough attention they would notice that something was different.

And it was of course at this moment, V crashed into her apartment. The door whipping open suddenly and startling both girls out of their shells. Tera chirped loudly and Uzi very nearly cursed.

“Back, took pictures.” V said bluntly, making Uzi take a deep breath to surpress the urge to beat her over the head with whatever she had in her hand. (A notebook, it wouldn't hurt, but still.)

“Okay. A. Thank you.” Uzi hummed, before her face fell “B. Bite me! You didn't have to scare the crap out of me!” She grumbled, standing up and resting Tera on her shoulder. V smirked, before her eyelights shifted down to Uzi's midsection.

“Huh. You can actually tell now.” She commented, which immediately made Uzi feel self conscious, she wouldn't lie and say that the visible change to her body wasn't off-putting.

“It hasn't been that long since you saw me.” Uzi pouted, turning slightly away from her ‘freind’. V clicked her tongue.

“How are you holding up?” V asked, ignoring her statement and tone much, much softer.

“Fine. Still don't know why you care so much.” Uzi replied, and V looked at the floor for a moment before Uzi got several pictures sent to her over short range, she filed them in a folder titled ‘MYSFLESH:/’

“’Fine’ isn't an answer.” V pointed out, crossing her arms, her attitude was normal grating on Uzi's nerves, but with everything else she had to stress about, it was genuinely beginning to piss her off.

“It's the only one you're getting. Now if you're finished doing everything in your power to make my day harder. I need to look over these pictures.” Uzi turned away, from the door, a sure way to tell V to fuck off, but unfortunately that did not happen.

“You're carrying, N can't be here all the time. It's… It's my responsibility to fill in when he's not here.” Uzi tensed up at V's words, hitting her like a sack of bricks.

“Your responsibility?” Uzi parroted back at her, whipping around to glare into V's visor. “Why is it your responsibility?”

V, for once, looked genuinely nervous about what she was about to say, her tail pressed flat against the floor.

“I don't-” She growled at herself, as if she was fighting her own programing. “It just is! I don't know how to explain it!” She finished, exasperated and throwing her clawed hands forward, showing more emotion then Uzi had ever seen.

“It's unbearable!” Her tail suddenly sprang up, kinking in several places before it went back into its default position. “I don't wanna be here either, but it's so much worse when I'm not!” She yelped, like a dam that had just cracked.

Uzi stepped back, alarmed at the sudden outburst. V began to pace back and forth.

“I-I think the worst part is that I don't entirely hate it! I want to! But you're not actually terrible, you're stubborn as hell and get on my nerves-” V grunted, whatever was making her agitated seemed to suddenly deflate, making her stop her pacing and rest her head within the palm of her clawed hand.

“Ugh. Freaking- God Dammit. I don't actually hate your guts, and I do actually care if you live or die. Happy?” V finished, a small golden blush displaying on her visor, crossing her arms.

Uzi took a moment to process, before snickering into her hand, making V blush harder and growl irritability.

“Do not.” V warned, but now her threats were empty, they always were, but now there was no pretending otherwise.

“Aww. V, that's like, the nicest thing you've ever said to me.” Uzi smirked, watching at V's tail thrashed like whip, displaying her discomfort.

“I don't know what you're talking about.” V replied, breifly looking away before her eyes came to glance at Uzi from the corner of her visor, Uzi was smiling.

And so was V.

-*-

“Alright. Alright. Settle Down!” Khan was standing up a stage set up in the WDF training course. The aforementioned equipment haven been deconstructed and put away, the rows of seating in it's ‘stadium-esque’ design being perfect for holding a bunker wide meeting.

Speaking of bunker-wide, every drone that made their home within the bunker was scattered throughout the seats, a rainbow of different eyelight colors staring back at him, even so seeing everyone in front of him made what he already knew more obvious.

There weren't a lot of them left…

The soft murmur of voices quieted, and Khan cleared his throat, looking back behind him to the other two drones with him. Uzi, sitting with her legs crossed and arms crossed, refusing to look ahead at their audience. And N, who was standing at stiff attention at her side, for once, Tera was not with them. Instead, V was looking after her, offering almost immediately.

He turned back to his audience, taking a deep breath.

“Thank you all for coming. I know everyone is curious on why I called this emergency meeting. So I won't waste time.”

He nodded to N, who nodded back and lifted his hand. A large yellow hologram of Copper-9 appeared above them, enough for everyone to see, it drew so much power from N's systems his eyelights and headband dimmed and he winced.

“This is our home, we've worked, fought, and made lives here for over a hundred years, not always independent, but always here.” Khan’s voice wavered.

“Right now, however, this is what our home looks like.”

With some effort on his part, N's hologram changed, one hole opening up, then another, and two more, until the surface of the planet was reminiscent of Swiss cheese, pockmarked full of holes. Images provided by V's scouting trip.

And out of each one, tentacles reached up out of them, pulsing and wiggling wildly, the audience gave a collective wince, several people gasped. And a few straight up burst into tears.

“After through study, it has been determined that twenty percent of the planet has already been consumed, the rest will follow within six months… give or take.” He continued, the waver in his voice was obvious now, but he powered through. N changed the hologram again, letting a fleshy substance cover the frozen surface of Copper-9.

“My daughter has come up with a plan; one that I will let her explain.” He suddenly turned to Uzi, N's hologram fading out and his glow returning to near normal, though an exhausted look flickered across his face.

Uzi took a deep breath, replacing her father's place on stage, feeling the mic attached to her shirt, heavy as lead.

“I know I don't have the best reputation.” She started, her voice croaking slightly. She balled up one of her hands, all the eyes boring into her as she felt her core speed up. “You all know me as Khan’s outcast, rebellious daughter, the one that brought the murder drones into the bunker.”

And so, so much more

She thought internally.

“But believe me when I tell you I want every single person here to make it out of this situation alive.” She nodded at N, who gave her a small smile before, with another wince, brought up another large hologram.

This one was of a shuttle, large enough to fit the entire bunker, though still very much only a concept.

“The cause of the infection is currently unknown, but the flesh that's spreading across the surface is deadly, contact with it causes rapid assimilation, and a loss of all bodily autonomy.” She paused for a moment, realizing she was speaking as if she was reading out of textbook.

“Zombification, in layman's terms.” She clarified, the audience was dead silent, but with another steadying breath and an even tighter grip on her own palm, she continued. “Our best option is complete planetary evacuation.”

There was a murmur through the crowd, one that Uzi was expecting.

“I hear you. This is our home, we've always lived here. And that kind of change is scary.” She was happy she had pre-written this speech with the help of her dad, otherwise, she would have definitely flubbed something up by now.

She had to give credit where credit was due, Khan knew how to write a speech.

“But leaving is a chance at survival, more then that, it's our chance to truly divorce ourselves from our past as nothing but tools for our creators.” At that she could hear several affirmative mumbles, she thought that might have been a good addition, there were many old drones that still remembered being slaves.

“From today, my plan is to build an escape shuttle, reverse engineering the landing pods already here to head to somewhere where we can start again.” N's hologram showed an image of a landing pod, before switching to a new planet, one covered in greenery instead of ice.

“Without all of us working together, this won't work, so I'm asking each and every one of you to pull together for this. Not for me, but for your family, your neighbors, your friends. And help make this a reality.”

She finished, finally, feeling satisfied with what she had said.

“Those in favor. Head down to the right of the stadium. Those opposed, to the left.”

Despite at this point needing to sleep for several sunlit days, N gave a last hologram, two arrows pointing left and right.

Uzi took the opportunity to check up on him, walking back towards him with a concerned frown.

“You okay? I know you haven't been sleeping well, and that took a lot of energy.” With everyone gathering below the stage, Uzi felt safe enough to place a hand on his chest. He gave a small smile.

“I'm good.” His hand came up into a thumbs up even as Uzi could see the ‘low charge’ symbol blinking at the corner of his visor. “You passed out this morning, I should be asking you.”

His hand came to rest on her baby bump, giving her a very tired grin as the hologram flickered slightly. “Baby has you exhausted too, I'm really proud of you for making this speech.”

She blushed, taking another glance around to insure no one was watching them.

“Let's just hope it was worth it..” Uzi blinked, did… did she just say that twice? Because it was either that or… the mic was still on.

She gasped, looking down at the mic attached to her, still blinking green, showing that it was indeed on. She looked back up at N, who looked equally as shocked. And she quickly turned it off, looking back at her dad, who had apparently been trying to get her attention this entire time, and now was just smiling sheepishly.

The stadium was dead silent.

Like a character in a horror movie, she slowly went to check on the rest of the stadium, the seats now all empty. She peered over the side and-

Not a single person was present on the left, every single drone voting in favor of Uzi's plan, when she was noticed back within view, she got cheers, she could hear congratulations mixed in with the “you go girl”s and straight cheers.

She began to tear up a moment of relief hitting her before the mortification she just announced her pregnancy in front of the entire bunker caught up.

She looked back at N, his hologram now gone, while he shrugged his shoulders with a smile, although a look on his face that was asking ‘are you alright’

No was the answer.

But even still, the plan was set in motion.

Next ->

[twinleafsystem]

ok wait im thinking now. come and play in my space with me

mal du pays (it/they) aka mal

siffrins sadness

once it becomes more friendly, it prefers to go by only mal

when asked about their name choice, they simply shrug and go "my name" and does not elaborate whatsoever

siffrin calls them his "little (x)". most of the time its "pal" or "buddy". mal does not refer to siffrin as anything specific and defaults to whatever who its mimicking would call them

doesnt have its own voice in the headspace. mimics a wide variety of voices and mostly speaks in short, repeated phrases. doesnt like to stick to using one voice for a long stretch of time

constantly in a bug eyed state. straight up O_O out here

when fronting, it

is a lot more rigid and tense

talks much quieter than siffrin and tries to keep all verbal communication to a minimum. will often simply refuse to talk altogether. if it chooses to, it will mirror the speech pattern of whoever its talking to

dont like to be touched by anyone. not even loop or treasure can touch it unless given express permission

chercheur d'affection (they/she) (only loop is allowed to use she currently) aka treasure

loops sadness

once they become more friendly, they prefer to go by treasure

loop calls them their "shard" and they call loop their "shine"

voice is somehow even higher than loops. cadence is pretty consistently singsongy, especially if theyre upset

constantly smiling. its very rarely real. its distinctly more v shaped than loops more catlike one. ^v^

when fronting, they

are a lot more touchy-feely. loves to hold and be held

somehow talk with their hands even louder than loop does. their whole Body talks, really. there is rarely a moment in which they are still

talks a mile a minute. where loop would pause to think of their next words carefully, treasure will barrel on and stumble and fumble their way through a sentence and then look at you expectantly, like you should have followed even after they restarted the same sentence 4 different times in 4 different ways

are always fidgeting with Something. if they dont have something in their hands they go nuts

theres a lot more i could probably say but im blanking now so ill just let this out into the wild and rb with more if and when i think of anything \^^/

[hystericstar]

Sidon x reader bath time

! MDNI !

cw: fem bodied reader, oral (fem receiving), gentle Sidon

“Like this, right?” Sidon ran a hand through your hair slowly, its golden claws gently scratching your scalp. The soap running down your bare back tickled, but it wasn’t enough to distract you from the breath fanning against your neck. “Yeah, that’s good.” You hummed, moving yourself to face the zora.

“Hylians are so different. The zora don’t require bathing all that often, as we are usually in water anyways. By default, we have the blessing of being naturally clean” His head tilted slightly in thought. Sidon reached for your hands and slowly brought them out of the water, holding them together between his much larger ones. “Teach me more.”

There was a short pause in response. You were unsure of what to do, given that you had to wash your body next. As if hearing your thoughts, Sidon quickly pulled you out of them.

"Ah, allow me." He turned to grab your bottle of body wash from off the edge of the pond. You watched him pop the lid open and squeeze a generous amount onto his hand, quickly working it into a nice lather. He shot you his winning smile, hands raised in front of him showcasing the fluffy soap they were coated in. "I'll bathe you, while you guide me of course. What do you say?"

"Well..." your eyes wandered to the side for a split second. "Your hands already have soap on them, so I suppose don't see why not."

"Perfect! Now, turn around so I can get your shoulders please." You did as you were told and put your back to him. His hands gently began massaging the nape of your neck, before easing down to your shoulders and sliding up and down the sides of your arms a few times. "I'm gonna wash your chest now, Alright?" He leaned over your shoulder, eying you for a moment before running his hands down your body when no sign of complaint was shown.

"A-alright." You breathed, shuddering lightly under the weight of his hands. "Be gentle."

"Of course, my pearl. I wouldn't dare harm you." He spoke in a murmur while making his way further down. He trailed a hand through the center before moving in circles around your breasts. He noted the way your breath hitched and chucked softly. He cupped your breasts, kneading the soft flesh and memorizing the feel of your nipples stiffening against his palm. Sadly, the sensation was short lived.

His hands went from your chest, to your hips beneath the water, kneading the soft skin. “Sidon…” you breathed, feeling yourself lean completely back against his figure.

“I do hope I’m cleaning you well.” A hand began to glide in a circular motion across your stomach, the other holding your hip in place. “You’re doing great.” You hummed. His chest rumbled with a soft chuckle. “You look divine my love. Hylia doesn’t even share a fraction of your beauty. I wish to never take my hands off you.” In his eyes you were nothing but a mythical being. A goddess in his arms bathed in moonlight. The soap highlighting every inch of you and encasing you in a soft glow that could only be described as something out of a myth.

Sidon cupped his hands together and brought water up to your neck, admiring how it made your skin glitter on its way back down into the pond. “Love?” You felt him move your hair out of the way. Sidon rested his head on your shoulder, his voice low in your ear.

"What's next my pearl?" He snaked his arms around you. feeling you tense up slightly before relaxing back into his embrace. "My legs."

He turned you around, picking you up to gently sit you down on the cold stone. You shivered at the temperature change, to which sidon quickly drizzled more soap on your thighs, and massaged it in with warm hands. "Better?" He looked up at you, the rest of his body past his shoulders still submerged in the water.

"Mhm!" You nodded your head, his warm touch distracting you form the chilled night air. “Let me know if I cause any discomfort.” He Hummed, pressing both of his hands to your thigh, rubbing circles on your skin form every side he could. He progressively eased his way higher, fingertip’s softly kneading the increasingly sensitive skin.

With heavy breath you leaned back on your arms, swallowing thickly when you made eye contact with the king beneath you. “You’re doing great, Sidon. It’s been a minute since I’ve felt so relaxed.” Your praise echoed softly through the air. Sidon’s eyes seemed to sparkle in delight. He wordlessly leaned closer.

“Relaxed you say? If I may, I do believe I know of another way to…well relax you. Perhaps you’ll find it to be more enjoyable?” His hands slid up and around your hips once more as his head inched closer and closer to your cunt. “What do you think, my pearl?”

Intrigued, you leant back up and cupped his cheek. Looking down at him from this angle made it difficult to tell if it was just the moonlight, or if his eyes were truly glowing under you. “Show me.”

Those were the words he wanted to hear. He simply smiled and offered a slight nod before closing the gap and pressing his mouth to your clit. You jolted, your legs fighting the urge to clamp around his head tightly. “Sidon!” You gasped, a plume of heat shooting through your body and pooling at your chest.

His forked tongue curved up, his teeth grazing lightly against your clit. He absorbed himself fully in the act of kissing and licking everywhere you’d allow him to, practically drooling in delight at the taste of your cunt in his mouth. You shamelessly whimpered above him, hunching over in chase of the euphoric feeling he was ever so kindly gifting you. Sidon tilted his head up to look at you. Mindlessly, he chuckled against your heat, the vibrations eliciting a few curses to fly out under your breath.

in the midst of your pleasure, he slipped a hand under the water and removed his face from between your legs with the sound of a wet kiss. “Sidon, wha-“ Your protest was cut off but him lifting himself out of the pond, hands next to your hips as he maneuvered you to lay back. He hovered over you now, water slipping off of him and sprinkling down over you. There was nothing you could have possibly done to prevent your eyes from darting down momentarily, realizing that his dicks were free and they were ready.

He softly laughed above you, your attention directing back into his piercing gold slitted eyes. “We can stop here, my pearl. I refuse to do anything you don’t want to.” Sidon couldn’t for the life of him hide the airiness in his voice, or the way it lightly trembled when he looked at you. “Alright?” This time it was a whisper, worry still imminent in his expression while he patiently awaited a response.

“No no, I wanna…” your eyes moved down his body again, but with a newfound intention the previous time lacked gravely. “Take me.

The kings breath instantly hitched, his breath growing heavy as his forehead pressed against yours. “Y/n…as you wish, my love.”

His hips moved forward, one of his tips softly pressing against your folds as the other pressed against your inner thigh. Sidon sucked in a sharp breath as he pressed in further, his arms going weak at your intoxicating warmth enveloping him. “I-is this alright? Are you comfortable?” The only thing you could do was nod and urge him to keep going.

Before you knew it, he was bottomed out and already panting over you with need. It wasn’t until you nodded that he moved his hips, shuddering at the sensation of dragging against your inner walls. He gasped a soft curse when you whimpered beneath him, cheeks flushed and eyes half lidded. He could see his shadow cast around you by the gentle moonlight. He watched in awe as your body moved with each rock of his hips, hands finding yours to hold against the cold stone you layed upon.

His thrusts got increasingly sharp as his mind went fuzzy with getting to pleasure you. “S-Sidon.” you groaned, eyes rolling back and mouth falling open with heavy breaths and whiny moans. “So good my love.” He panted, feeling a coil in his abdomen form with the intention of snapping soon. “A-almost.” He grunted. His thrusts grew sloppy as he released his seed into you with an arch of his back. Sidon nearly missed the way you trembled when he filled you up so good. “Remind me to bathe you more often.”

~《☆♡•°•°♡☆》~

the end was a bit rushed if you could tell lmao 😭 hope y’all don’t mind too much though. I’m so glad to finally get this out of my drafts omg

[ashen-crest]

[ID: a digital drawing of a man sitting with one elbow on his knee, hand in his hair. He has light golden skin, brown eyes, and black hair, and is wearing adventuring gear: maroon jerkin, brown leather pauldron, bracers, and a potion bottle strapped to his thigh. The plaque next to him reads: "Eli Valenz from A Captured Cauldron." end ID]

Eli Valenz from A Captured Cauldron (Sidequest Row #2)

I couldn't show you Ambrose without immediately following it up with Eli! I did my best to make an Eli portrait that Ambrose would simp over and an Ambrose portrait that Eli would simp over. Hopefully it kinda worked. (As usual, click the image for better quality- Tumblr turns the default view to potato quality.)

In book 2 (spoiler alert), Eli's embracing his new adventuring path in life, so I wanted his outfit to reflect that (while still also keeping the dangly earrings he loves so much).

(There is also a bearded version of this portrait, just like the Ambrose one, but again, that'll be for newsletter friends.)

Then the raptor turned, exposing its vulnerable right flank not to Burt, but to Hickory and Eli. Eli’s heartbeat quickened. If the monster pivoted any further, it would spot Burt. But if he hit that spot first— “I can get it,” he whispered to Hickory. “No. Let Burt do it.” The raptor cocked its head and spread its wings, as if testing the wind. Eli tensed—if it took off, they’d lose their shot. He swallowed and looked at Burt, who remained frozen in the beast’s blind spot, arrow still pointed at the ground. Patience, Eli recalled Oren saying. Patience and the right moment.  But his patience had evaporated with the heat. There was sweat dripping down his back, and Burt didn’t have the right moment, he did, he could take it right now, he just— The raptor peered at the sky and coiled its back legs, ready to launch—but Eli launched first.

Up next: the one, the only, Dawn Kerighin!!

[wanderinghedgehog]

As a film nerd, I think it’d be a fun idea to look at Les Mis 1978 from a filmmaking perspective rather than a Les Misérables perspective.

It’s so painfully obvious that this is a TV movie. But there are plenty of things that really make it feel very cheap. The one I notice the most is the score. It’s incredibly repetitive and distractingly prominent. The composition itself has a lot of potential, but it’s so misused, you get sick of it very fast. By 1978, those very dramatic, nearly overpowering tracks start to feel a little dated. My main suggestion would be to simply lower the volume. But if you’d rather keep the dramatic music as is, I might suggest adding in subtler background music to some of the surrounding scenes so that the main tracks feel less jarring.

Another thing I noticed is the camerawork. Essentially, it doesn’t match the tone of the scenes. Every now and then, they pull it together and get a well paced section, but they otherwise default to the camerawork they would use for a more subdued, conversational scene. The shots themselves don’t often convey much emotion and rely a bit too heavily on the actors. There is a scene that stood out to me as being better shot than most of the others: Fantine’s death/the confrontation. While Fantine’s death itself was a bit awkward, the rest of the scene was framed in a way that added to the tense atmosphere instead of just hoping Anthony Perkins could salvage another blank slate of a shot. Everything about the scene feels cramped, even claustrophobic, in a very appropriate way that I rather like.

There is also the problem of the script. Plenty of the lines it takes from the novel and those lines are generally pretty good. But I’m never going to pretend a TV movie script was gonna outdo Hugo’s prose, so I guess there’s not much there worth commenting on… Except the sacred promise thing. That was funny.

There’s an interesting thing with this movie’s style that makes me think it simply got lucky when it chose Les Mis as its subject. It’s a story that is simultaneously tense and quiet. Much of it is very contemplative and focuses on small details and brief conversations. For a movie that clearly likes to take its time with random shit, it sure chose the right novel to adapt.

Anyway, I rather like being pretentious every now and then. I love this movie regardless of its ridiculousness.

[ethicaltreatmentofcowplants]

Asylum Challenge: Day 14

Finally Wicked Whims may be calming down lol. While nothing that explicit will be shown, just something to keep in mind, I guess? Also I'd installed a new skin default accidentally so the Sims look a little different to usual.

We're on the Granny Grind, yes. And Lilac finally got her first Plopsy sale, let's go!

Level Two: Thread Setter

✅ Achieve Level 4 of the Knitting Skill ❌ Knit While Listening to Music ✅ Sell a Knitted Object on Plopsy

Two shots of Vlad's Trendi outfit for its many fans. Lilac's probably wondering if she can knit him a scarf to go along with it. While otherwise I like the Nifty Knitting pack, wasted opportunity with the lack of accessories. A standalone scarf or two (and some gloves and mittens) would have been so cute. Like how? A scarf is many people's first ever knitting project.

Lou came over for a visit. He likely came over for more than that, but Lilac was like "not now, I have an aspiration to complete."

Having sniffed his way into more than his fair share of my saves in the past, he understood that well enough and was happy just to vibe.

"And then he ran away shrieking like 'bat out!'" Rory recounting the time she threw down on Wolfgang's behalf.

Time to autonomously sit down next to a transformed werewolf and get tense moodlets! Rory's likely reading up on how to still further humiliate Vlad next time.

With Rory out of the room (I've been getting her to use her LUNAR HOWL ability every night to reset her woof-woof traits, and she rolled the one where she hates loud noises), Lilac finally checked off the last goal of this stage.

Level Two: Thread Setter

✅ Achieve Level 4 of the Knitting Skill ✅ Knit While Listening to Music ✅ Sell a Knitted Object on Plopsy

Vlad set the table for an early dinner and Lilac was the only one who used it 😔

Once more Rory was brimming over with Fury, so I took her and Lilac over to Moonwood Mill. Fortunately she snapped out of it pretty quickly.

Much to my irritation, I realised that there was nothing nearby that Lilac could sit on and knit. So I somehow (I think it was an UI Cheats function) got a bunch of household objects to appear in the space and kept the bed, as it looked the least out of place here.

Rory very enthusiastic about some grilled fruit.

Lily very enthusiastic about Lilac becoming a Friend of the Moonwood Collective. The greatest people you will ever meet!

So now she's friends of both packs, and yet has still to unlock the WEREWOLF ALLY trait.

Having established that he and Lilac are now on sleepover and fur braiding terms, Kristopher only then sat next to her on the shiny new abandoned bed to re-read The Lord of the Swings.

The rest of the pack soon joined in the excitement. No, nothing... Whimsical happened, just some cute High School Years bed sitting style animations.

Lilac likewise agreed that it was a solid 'get' for the Collective HQ. Nah, I think she'd just finished another project.

Level Three: Dream Weaver

❌ Complete 10 Excellent Quality Knittables (2/10) ❌ Successfully Gift 3 Knittables ✅ Achieve Level 6 of the Knitting Skill ❌ Successfully Show Off Your Knitted Sweater to Another Sim

Since Lilac has the SELF-ASSURED trait, her overriding mood seems to be 'confident' rather than 'inspired.' So those excellent quality knittables are going to take a while.

Well, I should have specified that nothing Whimsical happened 'at that point in time.' Lilac and Lou evidently had an IOU.

And then once more we returned home to Vlad napping outside in one of the party bushes. I think because the self-care club has 'sleeping' as one of its preferred activities, and since he has the weakness where he can only sleep in a coffin, the devs probably didn't factor in those.

[vertebrates-and-pieces]

... Alright, because my Morgott fluff craving is still strong.

What's the best way(s) to comfort Morgott?

For bonus: How would he comfort his partner?

Morgott, despite his complex of unworthiness, is also a paradoxically prideful individual. This combination makes him tend to lash out at most attempts at comfort, especially at first.

All platitudes will be swiftly rebuffed

"I'm sorry you went through that," Will only earn a huff and a terse response.

"Spare me thy pity."

He's not being rude or obstinate on purpose, mind you, he is simply so used to being almost entirely self reliant that accepting comfort or help feels like an insult. Wretched he may be, but who are you to look down upon him?! He has accomplished so much with so little, and to accept help or comfort almost feels like relinquishing a part of him that makes him who he is. He is firmly of the opinion that doesn't need your kindness as much as he doesn't deserve it.

The best way to comfort him when he gets into this whole thought pattern is to abstract it if that makes any sense. Find an example that seems unrelated but one that he can understand. He will likely argue at first but later return and begrudgingly accept what you have to offer. It is best not to rub it in his face that you were right, but to instead thank him for returning, for allowing you to help.

The Erdtree needs no help to stand tall, but his place as its staunch protector still has merit and does not devalue it's majesty. To begrudge a tree for being unable to hold a sword is to misunderstand its nature. As much as it pains him to admit defeat, it is hard to argue against that which he already accepts as true.

Be it truths, kindness, or even his own nature, he will become better at accepting over time.

If he's at the point where he is willing to accept touch and physical gestures, tactile comfort actually helps him a great deal. He is starved for touch and companionship more than he'll ever admit, so though he might say otherwise, the hand of someone he trusts rubbing up and down his arm means a great deal to him. The weight of this person leaning against him is grounding, keeping him firmly in the here and now where he is cared for and not alone. If they were to massage the tense knots of muscles that he refuses to acknowledge, he may grumble, call it unnecessary, but he won't actually complain. And if he leans into it and sighs, who's to say.

When comforting him with words, address things that he's actually proud of first before going into complimenting things that he does not like about himself, it lends credibility to the statements. Reassure him of your care and devotion often, he needs to hear it.

He will reserve his provision of comfort for those he deems worthy of it, but once that requirement is met, he is quite the giver. He will be stiff and hesitant at first as the comfort of another person is not something he is used to providing, but he is very good at lending an ear, and can be shockingly gentle and perceptive. He will mentally catalog what works and what doesn't, he will watch and learn how to be attentive to their wants and needs. Despite his sharp and biting tongue, he is capable of such genuine and heartfelt words, I know it I just know it.

I think his default comfort go-to is protection and service. He will instinctively assume a defensive position around you, glaring at any perceived threats as he ushers you away to a safer, more secure location. Need some water? Done. Quiet? He can make it so. Need someone tracked down and killed? The Night's Cavalry are currently scouring the area. Wait, you don't need any of that? You just need to be held? ….fine…. He can oblige. He's relieved you asked because he really wanted to hold you but he has a fearsome reputation to uphold and don't you laugh at him, this is a tactical choice he's is NOT shy the nerve

You really know you've made it once you are able to affectionately tease each other about these things. When you are able to call him an old sap and kiss him on the cheek when his eye becomes watery over a fond memory and only receive a snarl that is just for show instead of any actual indignation, that's the surest proof you've reached max affinity.

[jemmo]

his man 3 ep 9 + 10

consider me gagged. literally gagged. i tried so hard to avoid spoilers all day and im so glad i did bc wow ep 10 alone had changed so much for me. like i had to grab my laptop to write this so i could type fast enough to keep up with my thoughts. anyway.

and let me start off with what im a little less invested in, which is the youngjoon and myeongkyun situation. i was busy on holidays for a couple of weeks when this was picking up so didn't write about my thoughts, but it was safe to say i was more on youngjoon's side, not a staunch hater of myeongkyun but bc i liked youngjoon a lot at the start and also feel for the frustration of someone giving vague answers when you're trying to talk something else bc man ive been there. but with this conversation, it puts myeongkyun's behaviour in such a different light thats easier for me to understand and empathise with. like... if you were invested in a relationship that ended vaguely but you always kept some amount of hope alive all this time, only to be met with percieved coldness and harshness when you see that person again, i see why you'd tense up, which explains why he always seemed somewhat uncomfortable in the house. and i also understand why he seemed to 'pester' youngjoon, bc he's either conciously or uncounciously defaulting back to the dynamic and level of friendliness they had before. for youngjoon, he easily ended a relationship he thought neither party was too interested in, only to still be contacted by that person and then have that person pester you in the house. like that seems like someone who is trying to get at an ex. for myeongkyun, this is all a much longer process of him coming to terms with the fact that yes, he was more invested in this relationship and yes, he maintained some level of feelings and hope they'd come back together, and seeing him having to face the fact that he was the only one thinking that and whatever he was holding on to never mattered... ngl i cried a bit. the fact is him and youngjoon just are different when it comes to dating, youngjoon is very hot from the go, but if he feels nothing in return he backs off with nothing lost, whereas myeongkyun takes a lot longer to develop, realise and then admit his feelings, and so you can easily see how these two people would misunderstand each other. and i also wanna say how interesting i find myeongkyun's presentation and journey on the show. he came in with this big impact both bc of him being presented as this handsome and confident guy and bc he had a history with youngjoon. together, its easy to jump to the conclusion that myeongkyun was the one who did something to youngjoon or was in the wrong, when that wasn't actually the case at all. it also makes me wonder what kind of myeongkyun we wouldve gotten if youngjoon wasnt also there. would we have gotten this confident hottie? bc i think, bc youngjoon was there and all of this history was brought up (history of a first relationship by the way!! no wonder it got to him so much), making him face it revealed a much softer and more sensitive side of him that mightve taken longer had this not all happened, which in a twisted way im glad of bc it means he can now get closer with other people, and im interested to see how he will shift now, if we'll be able to see this goofy side of him but a lot more carefree. anyway, all of this is to say i ended up liking myeongkyun more than i thought bc suprise suprise, people are a lot more complicated than they first appear. and honestly... i might like him more than youngjoon now, but dont tell me from 3 weeks ago that.

and now to the juicier stuff. this whole love triangle that is apparently turning square. i really dont know how to put my thoughts into words bc im somehow both sad and happy?? i guess i wanna say there's people im happy for and people im sad for. first of all im sad for hwi, but also really glad this conversation at the end of ep 10 was had. we've seen too many examples on this show of people not knowing how to give up on pursuing people, and even more examples of people that are poor at communicating where their interest lies and letting people down when its needed, so this made me happy. after how overwhelmed he was in earlier eps, im glad seongmin is feeling some clarity, even if i disagree but we'll get to that and i guess its his feelings that matter, and im glad he communicated clearly where he's at. but man did my heart break for hwi during that chat. there's that youthful passion and naivety to his feelings for seongmin that just feels horrid and cruel to squash, but also necessary, and i will very much second seongmin and seungjin's sentiment that he can date other people and should know that seongmin is not the only person in the world for him. in this season, it seems people have so quickly and easily found their one person they want to commit to and easily formed couples, but that doesnt mean they're right, nor does it mean that's the only person for them, and the show seems to be encouraging them away from this too. hwi was just so enamoured by seongmin, it feels like he found someone that he thought was absolutely perfect, and so letting go of that feels impossible. but for me too, i did love them together, it was so sweet and cute at the start, but things can and do change and when they do, we all need to realise it doesn't lessen anything that happened. for those couple of days, everything they felt was genuine and they were happy and that can still be remembered fondly while mourning the fact that you won't have that same happiness with that person again.

and i also wanna say im kind of sad for jaeseung. i said just that i was happy about this clarity seongmin has now, but for jaeseung, i feel sad that he just seems so on edge all the time, like how people can be on the edge of getting angry all the time, except for him it feels like he'll spiral into his worst thoughts at the simplest things. like when hwi would talk about jaeseung, yes he'd be mad and jealous, but until the end of this ep, it didn't feel that deep, like he'd joke about getting mad but i wouldn't feel that much tension. and yes while hwi did get more frustrated in these eps, for a lot longer jaeseung has been so tightly strung and will so easily get mad just when he sees hwi and seongmin together. and im like... yes ok get jealous whatever, but you can't actually get that mad when he's equally entitled to spend time with the person he likes and try to win him over. and if its bc he really does like seongmin that much then im sorry but i don't think jealously to that much of a level is sweet. you aren't a thing yet, so just take a minute and breathe bc at the end of the day, seongmin and hwi will feel and behave however you want and thats out of your hands. and i know on some level its bc he's jealous of the fact that hwi is able to express his feelings so openly and blatantly while jaesung cant, like that is what he always focuses his frustration on as if hwi doing that is bad when actually its just completely within his right and jaeseung is equally allowed to express his feelings. plus i hate to say it but i just dont feel seongmin and jaeseung's chemistry yet. if i see it later on then im more than happy to change my mind but their date was so bland and matter of fact, they don't share any interests, and since that date there's been nothing that's made me vibe with them as a couple. it feels convenient instead of something that started with feelings but hey, if genuine feelings do develop i will stand corrected, but all i say is just bc something seems like it should be right, doesnt mean it actually is.

and my final piece of happiness will of course be for seungjin bc as much as im sad about hwi losing seongmin... hwi and seungjin has so much potential to be the perfect friends to lovers to put bridgerton s3 to shame. i just think theyre fantastic together, they get on so easily and match each other's vibe so well and i'd be so happy if something developed, but i dont want to get too excited bc hwi has been so focused on seongmin that i don't know if or how his interests for others will develop now.

but all in all i liked these eps, ep 10 especially, and im very interested to see how this new love square will resolve (remember, polyamory exists too)

[serenescribe]

Hi, Ell! hope you've been doing well ❤️ sorry for the rhyme, but its question time >:3

how about 4, 17, and 28 for the writing ask game?

Yet another writing ask game

4. Do you have any OCs? Do you have a story for them?

OH BOY. DO I.

okay so little storytime, when i was like, 13 to 16? i had a CRIPPLING fear of writing ooc characters. like i'd sometimes try to write and post fic but it was that fear that led me to not write as much as i do now. but i still had so much creative energy that i had to burn. so what did i do?

i made hundreds of ocs.

anyways, i have too many ocs and they all have too many stories ;v; but they are dear to me and i love them. granted i haven't worked on their stories as much recently due to focusing on fanfic more (and i'm also being vague because i don't think many people care for my oc tangents) but. augh. yeah

also i have a buncha danganronpa ocs in my fic nobody wants to hear you sing about tragedy. which is on hiatus indefinitely, but my kids are dear to me

17. Past or present tense? Why?

i tend to default to present tense when i write fanfic, but i actually don't have a preference for either! sometimes i miss writing past tense; as much as i adore present tense, sometimes i'll hit a road block with tenses and go "man i sure do wish i was in past tense rn then i could just past tense Everything"

there's also something to do with descriptions and past tense being better for that (for the way my brain works anyways) but i'm too lazy. anyways i like them both! but i'll usually do present tense for my fics

28. Any writing advice that works for you and you feel like sharing?

write down any ideas you get. i'm serious. i keep my phone next to my bed and keep my notes app out of my time restriction stuff because i get the most specific lines, scenes, random ideas when i'm about to pass out.

seriously, i have like six notes on my phone filled with rough ramblings and drafts for what would eventually evolve into full-fledged scenes for glaciers. i have done this for so many other fics too. i write down haphazard dialogue in lowercase with typos. i write scene staging (just shit like "character does x and y and then feels x and y") and then write it properly into a scene when i get to my computer. inspiration strikes at the worst of times so just jot it down! do NOT listen to that tiny voice that says "oh i'll remember it" because you WON'T. you won't. your memory is not immaculate, and you will forget.

it really does help to just have a pool of random dialogue, scenes, etc to pull from. it helps me figure out what i'm writing next when i remember "oh yeah past me had this idea which i can add here!"

[daifukumochiin]

Writers ask!

1. Start to finish, how long did it take to plan and write? Did you take breaks during the process?

6. How did you decide what tense and POV(s) to use?

18. Talk about your editing and revision process

26. Share your favorite detail

Since no one is curious about any particular fic, I'll just answer in a general sense, Lav 🥲 I'll address it to everyone who'd come across this post. 1. How long does it take me to plan and write a story? Do I take breaks during the process? > I don't have stellar records. So far, out of nine that I uploaded on ffnet, I have two completed one shots (one of those, I promised I'd write a part two, but I'm not interested in it anymore), a completed short multi-chapter fic, a microfic anthology, and then all the rest are WIPs. I've been DM for 7-8 years now... That's how long it is to plan my most read fic xD Technically, it is complete, but I promised some extra chapters and I could just never get it done. I'm answering in a roundabout way because I'm not as organized as Lav when planning and writing my fics. I don't keep records, I mostly go by feeling. However, if I do put my mind into it, I guess I could be the type to set a deadline and get it done. Though it's not a guarantee that I'd get the response that I hope for, and that makes me feel gutted. So, in my case, after getting familiar with my writer self through all these years, I need to believe in the importance of a fic more than anyone so that no matter the response and readership, I'd never stop until it's complete. How long does it take me to plan and write a story? Until the will to do it takes me through its completion, that's my answer. Do I take breaks? Hahaha! It's breaks that need to be taken from me.

2. How do I decide what tense and POV(s) to use? > Past. Third person limited POV. Those are my default. I don't think much about it. 3. Talk about your editing and revision process. > Even after I finish uploading a fic, I'll always end up finding errors here and there. I don't have a perfect chapter unlike PianoCoat. When I see an error in PianoCoat's chapter, I'm like, "whoa, that's rare." I edit for as long as I see mistakes, and for as long as I wanted to check for mistakes. I used to be more prudent with this, especially with my first fic, but recently, I don't have much time anymore, and you know, that's fine. I run it through Grammarly-sensei and even after then, I'd still catch some errors. Fresh eyes? Don't know her. Maybe give it five to ten years, then I'd truly have fresh eyes. Not the day after. Fresh eyes I tell you, isn't necessarily a good thing. Your past self's treasure could turn into your future self's cringe. My verdict: I edit and revise, but I'm not the best person for it.

4. Share your favorite detail. > 🤔... This took long for me to think about to be honest. I think I've already told everyone in the SasuHina Month discord about things I liked that I felt those are old things that aren't necessarily very true for current me anymore. I'm thinking maybe something from my most recent works. Is 2022 recent? Doesn't matter, let me tell you about it, 'cause I haven't told this to someone yet. I liked how my story for SH Month 2022 Day 3: Dépaysement took everyone on a journey where they didn't know how it would turn out. That's my favorite part about it. People knew it was a SasuHina story, but they weren’t able to predict the ending because the experience of the journey had immersed them. Also, I liked that Hinata had a hard time with the goats. That part was semi-autobiographical🤣

Thanks for checking out my stuff😽💞🙌 If you haven't yet and are interested, here are links for you:

AO3 https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daifuku_Mochiin/works

FFnet https://www.fanfiction.net/u/9526245/Daifuku-Mochiin

[birlwrites]

How goes Bloodfinch! Are you at the stage of writing parts yet? Is there a particular area of writing (dialogue, point of view etc) that's particularly fun with it?

And another hopefully answerable but somewhat generic question (to give you the power of surprise yet if you want it!): what person and tense have you gone for? or have you varied it according to a pattern of your own design?

If there's stuff to say about the process of writing concerning what brings you joy (and not further worldbuilding/plot details necessarily that I'm sure time will reveal) it'd be interesting to hear it!

Also, as a side note, you said you very much identified with the sliding meme of your opinion on your skills varying. Hence, I desire to communicate that I think you're consistently brilliant! I am curious why you feel that way though, as I was shocked it was somewhat widespread (I have days where things don't go so well writing, naturally as consistency isn't quite how it works as an area, but find my faith in my skills is rather solid and veers only between "I'm fine at it I suppose?" to "oh yes, it's an area of skills I've worked on that I'm good at" with more sporadic bursts of "I'm a genius! I'm so great at this!" never reaching more despairing "I'm hopeless, utterly hopeless").

it goes well!!! i'm having fun!!! i'm nearing 2.5k now - i had a longer draft, but had to frog that since i decided to start the story in a different place. i'll probably grab and reuse snippets of it later on though. and the outline is complete!! i'm hoping that it'll be similar to lachrimae in terms of time it'll take me to write, although unlike lachrimae i'll then do at least one round of editing once i have a full draft, plus then i'll need to do like. layouts and get cover art and stuff

finch, the pov character, is a singer, and i'm having a WILD time being able to write a very highly trained singer - her tutor (dulceis) definitely has. some traits in common with. certain singing teachers i've had. just wrote a line about dulceis standing on the opposite side of the room from finch yelling 'WHERE ARE YOUR CONSONANTS I CAN'T FIND THEM' and. yes

it's first person present tense and it'll stick to that - normally i'm a third person present tense writer by default, but i'm going for first person here because a) we are VERY deep inside finch's head and b) that was the best way for me to make clear that despite her calling herself finch, that's not what other people call her

i also just created yet another saint today, the sea-saint, who's associated with the sea (duh) and those who make their living from the ocean (sailors, fishers, etc), AND ALSO rhetoric, poetry, and all of the word-arts. the sea-saint is associated with fluidity (duh), impermanence, but also a certain type of control - navigating uncertainty. there is a story about the sea-saint calming choppy waters just by speaking to them and persuading them to settle. they're represented with a wave, a seashell, or a siren (this tends to be the less positive side of the saint, representing fickleness, hunger, and misleading appearances)

oh and i also just wrote up a little story about the origins of bloodfinches, because i was going to type up my handwritten notes but writing up notes was boring and writing up a story that conveyed the same information was far more interesting - so perhaps i'll post that! in a different post though, so it can just be its own thing instead of being buried in this response

naturally from finch's pov i also get to go wild with the auditory imagery which is fantastic, and i'm also having a great time with introducing original characters - even though i work with very, very, very, very, VERY minor characters in hp fanfiction, so minor that in many cases i am inventing characterization out of wholecloth, people still already have certain impressions about characters' appearances, personalities, and general vibes. that is not at all the case with completely original characters and figuring out how to introduce them and convey impressions of them is SO MUCH FUN i forgot how fun it was

i think that the reason my perception of my own writing tends to swing back and forth wildly is because i associate it with ease. words are flowing? plot details are blooming? everything feels great! but if i am not living up to my own expectations, if trying to write feels like banging my head against a wall, or if a scene isn't coming out the way i imagined it and i don't know what the problem is, or i DO know what the problem is and it's going to be a shitload of work to fix, or if it's not connecting with readers the way i thought it would, then i do have a tendency to spiral

logically, i am a fairly confident writer, but emotionally, i'm of course more inconsistent, and emotions tend to rule the day when it comes to how i'm feeling about my skills at any given moment. fortunately, i'm at least aware of that, and i know that feeling like it's hopeless means a) it's not actually hopeless, my brain just likes to latch onto worst-case scenarios, and b) it is well past time for a break

a central issue here is that i often expect very high levels of productivity from myself, and so then even if i know it's time for a break, i then am fighting a separate battle in which i have to convince my brain not to beat me up over needing Break Time, and it all leads to me staring at the wall wishing i could put my brain in a washing machine