#its like midnight and i just watched 13x5

[purgatorybfs]

another one about dean and grief that cant be named

transcript under the cut

they get muddy in my mouth these words I wish I could say. they’d be followed by tears leaving trails of grief visible on my face. Yet, my throat knows no sobs, my sadness no temporary relief because my soul was being held together by hands I can’t admit I miss. I am well-versed in making peace with loss but losing you has made me unfold parts of myself I didn’t know belonged to me. I’ve loved you only inside my mind and now this love has to make space for the nothingness I must keep to myself.