#its like an all girls catholic school but its a military org instead

[dokutah-exe]

Why does Rhodes island only hire gay people. Are you some kind of heterophobic organization or something

We here at Rhodes Island pride ourselves in our diversity. However, we understand that we should represent all operators in our organization, which is why I've been hard at work preparing a Straight Pride(tm) Half Day to make sure our operators who only swing one specific, opposite adjacent and locked in way feel seen. I've prepared a slew of specific activities for our fellow Heties, which includes:

A fine assortment of dry crackers for consumption (no cheese)

Various re-runs of sitcoms that involve nuclear family values, such as Cheers, or Everybody Loves Raymond

Discussion circles about how to manage Heterosexuality and the struggle of everyday identity expression (I can't be in it and neither can any main Rhodes Islands staff, speaker to be determined)

Speed-dating operators for our lonely hearts who can't seem to catch a break finding their one true not-their-gender love (with a heavy heart we excluded polyamories from this equation for the odd folks out as it would result in an unheterosexual pair-up no matter how you split it)

A Straight Pride Flag demonstration in said conference room (locked, with no one else able to see or have it visible, and put away after the end of the event)

And so much more!

I can't wait to see all of our profoundly heterosexual operators show up to our event, such as... uh... um... hm... well, you know who you are.