#its jsut surprising when it does happen! lol

[menstrualchocolatier]

do u have any ocs 👉👈 a moot of mine asked and now i wanna know if u have one!!!!!

THANK YOU FOR ASKING I HAVE SEVERAL

okok so the main ones areeeee probably broanch (and all the other characters in sywpq by extension) and donovan but ive got some others

donovan doesn't have much lore but shes pretty much just 15 year old art kid who likes bunnies and drawing anime gore she makes those stickman fight animations in her free time and probably is somewhat scene now that i think about it??? that girl is blasting millionaires in the back of the classroom loud enough for everyone to hear lmao

i had a dream where i was having a panic attack in class and she calmed me down and gave me her hat and was very niceys so i made her real because she was nice lol

donovan is also not her real name but she thinks her real name is stupid so she doesnt go by it and she took the name off a book or something

^^ she

and then i put the sywpq stuff under the cut cus its long lol

ok so SYWPQ

first off I CANT FIND MY GOOD DRAWINGS OF THEM :((((( BUT HERES THEIR GENERAL DESIGNS

fair warning i wrote most of the lore when i was like 11 so its a bit stupid but eh

broanch is this girl from an alien race (called steyaes) that split off of humans a really long time ago and has kind of just been hopping planets ever since

the patch of galaxy they ended up in was very barren of resources so this species kinda spent a lot of time just floating around in the void in a sorta hibernation like state or hopping between asteroids and small planets, whatever they could find, and using the limited resources before jumping off to look for another

theres also a thing that like. evolved?? or something??? in thats essentially jsut magic they have magic powers. imagine like a video game stamina bar that empties as the character uses it to manifest objects and attacks and yeah thats pretty much it (it takes a lot of energy to use so it's not used often for anything more major than like. controlling small objects, manifesting clouds {saoirse does that a lot}, electrical shocks, etc, but it can be used for larger things like combat)

(broanch's power stuff is more suited to combat while saoirse's and juneau's are more for controlling water and air)

she had a shitty childhood, parental neglect n all that, and spent a lot of time playing by herself and with this pair of sisters she befriended (saoirse and juneau), and pretending that she was in charge of various different things and this eventually manifested into her really wanting to host some type of tv show

when she was around 16 she ran off cus. shitty home life. and since steyaes are one of the relatively stronger human-adjacent species she ended up taking up various jobs bounty hunting or going off looking for rabid animals that were causing issues so she can kill them or whatever

she kinda just went around doing whatever for a couple years until eventually

one day she and saoirse were on this random planet they found that didnt really have much going for it but they were just kinda talking doing whatever, when humans found it

at this point in the universe humans do know theres other civilizations out there and have talked to them but they all kinda tend to keep to themselves so the humans on the ship are a lil surprised to find someone here

since this planet is otherwise entirely empty theyre like "ok cool this is ours" but broanch basically just goes "nuh uh i was here first" and starts fighting with nasa cus this planet is HERS actually ueah totally uh huh

....and then i dont exactly remember what happens at this part cus again i made most of this when i was 11. but. basically they dont really resolve the fight but because its happening there's loads of tv coverage and broanch is immediately like "WOW IM ON TV :DDDD" and decides that now is when she should finally bring her tv show host dreams to fruition

since she's only known for being on this planet she decides to use it as the prize for her new gameshow and then also decides (purely to piss off nasa) that the show is going to be run as a club at a random highschool cus why not lmao

the show is called "So Ya Want Planet Q?" and the contestants are all 16-18 year old students at a highschool in bumfuck nowhere america

she did not tell them going into this that is was a gameshow and advertised the club as an "afterschool hangout thing"

episodes are recorded live through saoirse running around with a camera and the show functions similar to something like total drama or bfdi (i made this entire thing in the trenches of my bfb hyperfixation lmfao) except instead of elimination by vote theres a point system, and the games change pretty much every episode, ranging from fairly normal stuff like trivia to a literal bomb defusing thing at one point

broanch is the main host and does all the talking and saoirse is the cohost and helps set up challenges and man cameras, and acts as the voice of reason to broanch's stupidity

saoirse's spent more time on earth and knows more about social norms and culture and shit so she's also the "resident human expert" because broanch has no fucking idea what shes doing

saoirse and juneau im still working on fleshing out but theyre pretty much just. normal. idk

saoirse's the cohost obviously and while juneau does help with the show occasionally she generally thinks its a bad idea so doesn't very often

i have a few other misc characters but those are the two i draw the most :D ive got another thingie called like plantii or somethign but again that was mostly made when i was 11 and also all the lore is on my laptop profile that im still locked out of :(( ill find it eventually though

[kim-irl]

ppl who have commented on my instagram fanart bc i tagged them: the orion experience, the aquabats, carla from plumtree

people who will most likely not comment or like my instagram fanart: shawnee smith :pensive: 

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS MORE, MORE BLOOD Vol. 12: Mukami Ruki [Another Story]

Original title: アナザーストーリー

Source: Diabolik Lovers More, More Blood Vol. 12 Mukami Ruki [Deluxe Edition]

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Takahiro Sakurai

Translator’s note: I feel very much conflicted about this CD still. While I do kind of like how they took a different approach with the Another Story track and the way it ends, I still think Ruki went way too far in the main CD. It was interesting to see everything from his perspective too, although this means there’s a bunch of inner monologues in this and it’s Ruki so they’re quite long. I try to break up the paragraphs by describing what happens based on background sounds and such but this one just has a bunch of rambling lol. 

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

“Lately, she has been formidable. Even though she was always the type of girl to make the most foolish mistakes, to the point where one would wonder if she did it on purpose. She has not been getting scolded by me either. That does not bother me. Or at least, it shouldn’t bother me. So why do I feel so...restless?”

*Ding・dongー Ding・dong*

Ruki walks up to you in the inner courtyard.

( So that’s where she’s been...Look at her just casually watering the plants... No wonder she did not show up in the library. I assume she has completely forgotten about our meeting. )

“So this is where you’ve been.”

You flinch.

( Huh? What’s wrong? Why would she be so surprised just because I called out for her? Also...Under normal circumstances, I’d assume she would panic and spray water all over me with that hose she just so conveniently happens to be holding. Yet, she made the wise decision and turned off the water. )

“Oh well. I shall praise you for ceasing your actions as soon as you saw your Master approach. However, there should be something you have forgotten.”

You bring up the promise.

“Oh? So you do remember. Then you should have just hurried to the library.”

( Now this is new. I didn’t think a scatterbrain such as herself would have remembered our plan to meet up. No, if she remembered, she should have come to me straight away. Did she only just now remember? Even so, her behavior is off. Or am I simply overthinking things? )

*TIMESKIP*

( Once it starts boiling, the dressing will be complete. Which leaves just plating the salad. )

You enter the kitchen.

“...Hm? You’re already here? You almost resemble a dog or a cat rather than livestock, lured in by the scent like that. Let me tell you just in case, it is not feeding time just yet. Wait until I’m done preparing it.“

You nod and leave.

( Oh? She left without offering to help? I’m glad to see her so obedient, but then what did she come for in the first place? Usually she would insist on helping even if it’s more of a bother and either cut her finger or break one of the plates. Those are the kind of things she does. )

He turns off the stove.

“What is this feeling as if something is...off? Something about the way she’s been acting trips me up. Come to think of it, I haven’t seen her make a blunder even once as of late. That isn’t something which should bother me, but I just can’t seem to get rid of this unsettling feeling in my chest. What has gotten into her...?”

*TIMESKIP*

Ruki enters the room

“We finally made it back. That was quite the disaster. ...Honestly, why do I have to wear the clothes she picked out for me? Well, I suppose she did not make a bad choice for once. I’ll add it to my collection of casual wear. That being said...Nothing happened today either.”

He takes a seat on the bed.

“How many days has it been since she stopped making mistakes? She won’t even show dangerous behavior. What kind of miracle is this? No, I do not mind that. I shouldn’t mind it. It basically means a huge pressure has been lifted off my shoulders. Then why do I feel so conflicted? Her suspicious behavior piques my interest, but even beyond that...”

( I felt as if something was lacking. Oh, I get it now. It all makes sense now. I have not gotten to taste her blood as of late, so I must feel unsatisfied. I am not the type of guy who easily becomes thirsty for blood, nor would I indulge in her without a good reason. However, with less opportunities to punish her, our time together automatically decreased as well. To be upset because of that, I must seem like a spoiled child throwing a tantrum because his mother does not pay enough attention to him. It is obvious since when I have become so obsessed with her

...Since the moment I decided to betray the whole word and chose her, I must have already been enraptured by her. Harshly sucking her blood while restraining her movements was something which fulfilled my desire for dominance. It most definitely made me feel good. However, somewhere deep inside, I felt relieved when she accepted me without fighting back against it. At some point, I even began to cherish those moments where I would pierce my fangs through her skin. I must be quite the easy man as well. I always thought I was in charge, but I may have actually been the one wrapped around her little finger instead. (1) I cannot show myself to that man like this. No, I assume he is already well aware. )

Ruki suddeny raises his head.

“Hm...? That man? Speaking of which, that hourglass I gave her...I considered the possibility but could it be...? Even if she were to make some sort of mistake, if she rewinds time, she could do the same scenario over again. If she makes it so only she remembers, it would be easy to keep it hidden from me. I wanted to believe I was simply overthinking things, but now that I think about it with a clear mind, it really is suspicious...I’m sure that even someone as slow as herself would eventually get things right after two of three tries. If she has been using that hourglass to cover up her own mess-ups, then I have no other choice but to punish her for such a foolish act.”

( It became clear to me that I would have to set up a trap to find out the truth. ーー And if her actions were to be exposed, I would make sure to compensate for the lack of disciplining these past few days. I can already imagine her crying out. I probably should not feel proud for having such thoughts. However, this is not a bad situation. It may be somewhat shameless, but it seems like I am enjoying it quite a bit. To get to use her own blunders as an excuse to suck her blood, or knowing that no matter what I do, she will not get away from me. )

“I suppose I shall enjoy our time together for the first time in a while...Which may just turn out to be a hellish period for her.”

*TIMESKIP*

*Ding・dongー Ding・dong*

Ruki pulls back after sucking your blood.

“...Hah. Your blood tastes even sweeter than usual. By sucking it repeatedly, the flavor ripens, becoming richer, almost like wine. Or in other words, like a stew you kept on the stove for too long. If it simmers any longer, it might just burn. I suppose we could put it to the test. After all, no matter what happens to you, all we have to do is turn back time.”

You keep quiet.

“You can hear me, right? Why not give some sort of reaction? I would not mind seeing you miserably struggle in vain.”

You still fail to give a response.

“Guess she really did lose consciousness. Judging by the looks of it, I doubt she will wake up even if I were to rewind time. I guess you could consider us even now. Perhaps I went a little too easy on her, but I shall forgive her now.”

He takes a step back.

“Such an innocent sleeping face. Almost as if the obscene expressions you showed me earlier were nothing but a lie. Your sheer white complexion and screams were not bad. As well as how you would cling onto my clothes, remaining by my side despite your obvious fear.”

*Thud*

“...Ah!”

*Cling*

“The hourglass...”

Ruki picks up the Hourglass.

“That man might have been testing me after all...Me? Or rather, us? ...Now that I think about it twice, the ability to manipulate time is something which should only ever be given to God. We could have possibly overthrown all logic in this world if we so wished. Yet, we used it to cover up for trivial mistakes. Then this is basically just some child’s toy. However...I am sure that was for the best.”

He turns his head to look at you.

“You might be more of a genius than I thought. However, how many times did you rewind? The magic has almost run dry. The few times I rewinded are basically irrelevant. I wonder just how many times you repeated your own ridiculous mistakes? Oh well, I shall drag that out of her later. I doubt she will easily confess though. ーー No, I suppose there is no point in asking her. I can simply confirm it with my very own eyes.”

*Cling*

“With this amount, we can still turn back time just once. That’s plenty.”

*Thud*

*Tick tock - Tick tock - Tick tock - Tick tock*

ーーー

“Hm…”

You approach Ruki.

“Oh? It’s you. No, it’s nothing serious. I was simply lost in thought.”

You take notice of the hourglass in his hand.

“You seem curious. Are you that interested in this thing? Blood red sand…Its decorations are beautiful as well. It would make for the perfect interior piece.”

You ask if there is a catch.

“No, it’s jsut a regular old hourglass. There is nothing special about it.”

*Thud*

“More importantly, you mentioned you wanted to look for resources for your assignment, right? Meet me at the library during tomorrow’s break time. I shall help you.”

You seem surprised.

“Yes. As your Master, it is my duty to look after you. However, do not be late, okay?”

You nod.

( Well then...I wonder what the next few days will have in store for me? How many mistakes will you make, and how many times will you get punished by me? ...I am looking forward to it. )

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) Literally he says that he always intended to be the one ‘holding the reins’, but instead he was actually tied up/restrained this whole time. 

[astro-break]

Thoughts on the 8th ep of Hypmic Rhyme Anima. Spoilers beware

Ep.1 | Ep.2 | Ep.3 | Ep.4 & 5 | Ep. 6 | Ep. 7

Love that every time its a MTC centric episode im so busy that i can’t watch it the day it airs

I like how the beginning of the episode kinda mirrors the events in MTC’s story in ARB

hey hypmic you wanna try making it Less obvious who the culprit is? like damn you’re just giving away secrets like its candy. First Ramuda, the Ruikawa and now these two assholes. Might wanna keep your cards close before you spoil the ending of the anime oh wait they already did that nvm :p

Samatoki please have some sense of self preservation and ask what its about before accepting something. but I guess it also speaks to how trusting he is of those he lets close to him which also explains a bit more as to why he hates Ichirou’s guts

Love that Jyuto is actually choking the information out of someone and Samatoki is actually gathering intelligence and creating boards out of it. Most people expect the opposite from their characters and it such a great dynamic

I find it hilarious that Rio uses older computers but that brings up the question of “How far into the future really is hypmic?” bc those computers look to be from early 2000′s which would be A N C I E N T and completely unusable for hacking come a time when WWIII happens

Iris on a bike has no rights looking as hot as she does. The vehicle CGI is really nice too and so is her character model on top of the bike. Loving how Iris completely owns the two cops

The MTC love here is jsut. through the roof i can die happy now that i’ve seen Samatoki aggressively caring for his teammates animated and voiced. like, please. just. help. I can.t/ MTC care so much for each other I would hug them all and tell them good work, you can finally go rest now uughghghgh MTC guys. MTC

But mannn Iris is so cool, approaching MTC without any fear

I find it hilarious that Saburo would pose as a game dev from dubai which yknow doesn’t make any sense if you think about it. but whatever it just makes me laugh at how easy it is to fake a lot about yourself because yeah! it is easy! 

The whole conversation about cops and good cops seems a bit off considering ACAB but considering Japan who has largely swept both BLM and ACAB under the rug it isn’t surprising. That isn’t to say that Japan doesn’t care, its just that these movements aren’t on the spotlight so topics like these don’t carry as much weight

lol yeah he should have expected to be stabbed from the front lol

SRKHFSKJD Rio please stop living in the water, i can’t believe he did that lol

Love the SamaJyuto subtext in the translation lol

Jyuto’s sequence is kinda cute in a way ahaha

The kurosawa-esque b&w screens are a nice touch to the song as well as the MC Name drops and hypnosis speaker drops. Idk about Rio’s 2DIE4 reference though since it doesn’t really rhyme nor does it add much to the rap itself

The song itself is pretty nice but it isn’t a bop like Fallin’ was. It has a different more gritty feel to it that i don’t hate but isn’t my style

Of course Iruma pulls this situation into his favor, its so typical of him.

Rio didn’t speak much here and took a general backseat to everything. I wonder if it was because during the time of recording this episode, Rio’s VA, Kamio Shinichiro, went down with The Virus (you know the one) so he couldn’t record much. Who knows but best boy. just let me hear best boy’s voice please

Ramuda’s phone vibrate actively annoys me oh my god it makes my skin crawl

If Ramuda’s sleeping on the couch then that really does confirm that Ramuda lives in his studio. Not surprising considering everything we know about Ramuda but at the same time, please get like a futon or smth sleeping on a couch will only hurt your back

Ramuda just busting in is fun

but im not sure how to feel about two divisions shoved into one. like this is basically telling us who is the important divisions, Ikebukuro and Shinjuku. Obviously BB are the protagonists of the series what with the staff coming out to even say that Ichirou is the hero, and if you know what happens then you know why Shinjuku is also highlighted which. also gives away the ending of the anime. again. I’m just glad that the team decided to stick with the irl results bc if they didn’t, they’d have a lot of angry fans

Back to my main point tho, this just. pisses me off. I love FP and MTC and to see them sidelined like this doesn’t feel fair. they deserve full eps to themselves bc if I’m being honest, these two teams have some of the best inter team dynamics out of the current cast. I understand that budget issues and episode constraints exist but this is just kinda frustrating that my main division has been tossed aside and the team that gets the most overall development gets thrown away too

Im not surprised that they cheated because gambling anime is about who can outcheat the other and the mind games played. thats the thrill of gambling series is the psychological factors in it

Ramuda emulating Gentaro’s speech is cute

The mindgames are not present at all and I expected that lol

thats.... midly gay gentaro lol do you always go around pressing shit into people’s mouths while leaning in close? thats pretty gay lol i love the homoerotic subtext present in this episode. First SamaJyuto and now GenDice

no speaker summon sequence? thats slightly disappointing but whatever. the anime is really doing FP dirty by cutting a lot of corners with their episodes

I never noticed that Ramuda and Gentaro hold their mics in their left hand while Dice holds it with his right. neat detail

I love how even in a battle FP still keeps their preppy attitude

Gentaro looks so awkward to the little sway and kick thing in the song lolol

This is probably one of the songs that I like the least. Jackpost is a very Dice song and not really fitting for either Ramuda and Genaro. I think i’d like it more if it was a dice solo or dice centric but the emphasis was pretty cleanly spread so that makes it pretty hard to enjoy

Oh hell yeah FP meshing as a team is just, so cute. Though that foreshadowing with Ramuda and his candy is just. wow

Yup they kept the og brackets so I think the anime’s going to stick with the IRL results. Which means that any tension they try and build won’t work for ppl who are already familiar with the series but I hope they don’t take that fact as an excuse to slack off

[huntsman-ash]

LiveThoughts: RWBY V8E6

Second attempt at this since last time Chrome just DIED for no reason...

Im going to put literally the entire thing with Cinder under one note; Called it.

Its a great set of stuff, sure, but it doesnt relaly tell us anything we didnt already know about Cinder, and I personally feel it doesnt really explain why she turned out the way she did. I feel like we’ve had another weird twist of the situation again...M+K? Coronas fault? Who knows. Either way, this section isnt great by my taste and I kinda skipped most of it. 

Few things to note though; Apperently in Mistral scrubbing by hand is still more viable floor cleaning tech than using Dust.

The wind vane on the roof has the Rooster Teeth symbols rooster on it. 

The hotel Cinder is bought by is named the Glass Unicorn, fittingly enough for...several reasons. 

The coffees behind the stepsisters when we first see them are the animated versions of the real life stuff RT put out just before this season went live. 

No one seems to notice the fact cinder has orange eyes. I wonder if weird eye colors are just a THING in Remnant?

The control collar/shock thing is incredibly inefficient in design, since it doesnt actually hold on to her very well. A more effective brace/choker design would have worked better.

The song that goes on during all of this is...kind of obvious and a little bland? Fitting for younger Cinder I guess. 

Mmm. Random greasy huntsman. 

I guess in Atlas its fine to laugh at struggling teenagers?

Im going to assume there’s a 3+ year gap here where she gets older, cause she stops being smol and gets closer to how we see her now.

Also even here, in Atlas...really? The most effective way to clean these carpeted floors is to have a TEENAGER SCRUB THEM BY HAND?

How do you scrub...I assume its carpet anyway?

And how you tell civilians are lame in Atlas; they are impressed...by a sword.  Just a sword. A boring, half-cut sword. Losers.

I assume this would be Cinder’s semblance manifesting. Also note on the desk; “we do not serve faunus”. Well THAT doesnt surprise me.

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHE. Get fucked Cinder. HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

I dont even feel pity for her, this is funny to me.  Also the fact that this kind of shit aCTUALLY EXISTS is...amusing to me. Like, really? So I guess indentured servitude is a thing in Remnant too. 

And this is why Cinder likes to use swords. Really. Wow. LAMEO.

Huh. Dual maces. Interesting. Thats a prety cool weapon.  Looks like they open up too. Bet he could bash some skulls with that.

“Hurting them isnt going to make your life any better”. Um, excuse me? I think hurting them is the very best thing to do in this situation. At least, for the moment anyway. 

Huh. So she’s ten at this point? Even as a child, shes older than she looks. 

And training montage. Huh. Or at least I assume it is. I get the feeling being able to go where you want too and do what you want too is the main reason Hunters exist. There must be crazy tight immigration laws...or, maybe, its just that traveling between kingdoms is stupid dangerous cause of Grimm. I think the latter is most likely considering every form of public transit extra-kingdom we’ve seen (even between cities, see Argus Limited) has some kind of defensive weaponry. Limited and ineffective, for th emost part oddly.

So you can take the exam at 18. Okay cool. Pre-that must be prep school. Wonder what happens if you wash out? Also I like how this dude is just “yeah, 7 years of training, we got this.”

I think this is the first time we’ve seen the other side of the moon. Or at least, the proper other side...bloody hell I STILL dont know how all those piesces are still held in place, the thing looks like it should start yeeting bolides at Remnant. 

Better still we see it MOVE, rotate in time to the passing of years. So it literally does rotate on its own axis, and more importantly, unlike OUR moon, its NOT tidally locked. We only ever see the same side of our moon. REmnants rotates MUCH faster. Also it doesnt seem to have phases like ours does. I’ll check on why that is. 

Well at least we have an explanation for why Cinders so damn good at fighting people. Trained by an Atlas Huntsman.

Also as a note the device is quite literally just an electrical Dust crystal attached to a necklace. Things the most inefficent torture device Ive ever fucking seen. 

Wonder how often they have to change the crystal.

And there goes the moon rotating again.

I like how NO ONE comment on the blade going missing and that guy never came back for it. I guess he must have just bought a new one.

I get the very distinct feeling they wont just let her go honestly, permission or not. 

AWWW WE DONT EVEN GET TO SEE CINDER MURDER THE SISTERS. Also no blood. Odd.  Good kill on the  stepmother though. Oh, that NECK CRACK.  I like how all the bitch can do is try and shock Cinder, like, uh...adrenaline up? SHE HAS A SWORD? MAYBE FIGHT BACK?

Hah. Weak ass fuckin Atlas people.  Also the clock going off in the back ground twelve times. How fitting. Welcome to midnight. 

Also shes kind of glowing here cause the room is dark, and I find it amusing this is probably the last time she wears white.

And THERES the Cinder we know

Sick ass music, cool. Also THAT is an interesting semblance...I guess he turns himself to metal? Also DAMN his aura broke after THAT? Hes a Huntsman...ah who cares. Again probably in Cinders memory more than anything. Which at this point is probably about as reliable as a coked up hookers.

SHANKED. Sucker. You shoulda seen THAT one coming.

And thats all it took to get the shock collar off. Lol. 

So what happened to the hotel? Did they just...write it off? I mean four people got murdered in there...

And now we’re back on the whale. HOW THE SCREAMING FUCK DID CINDER JUST...

Wow. She just got up after eating that blast. Fucking plot armor.

Merc making the hard calls honestly.  Im actually gonna watch all of this now which is nice because I want to know whats happening in the real world. PITY MORE THAN HALF THE EPISODE WAS THIS FUCKING FILLER.

I like how Cinder just...goes quiet the moment she realizes shes lost Mercury. Not that he was USEFUL mind you but if I had to guess she liked being the boss. But now shes...basically back where she started. 

So the whale is basically a ship. It has a bridge. Probably Salems throne room.

Man, Oscars literally just RTs punching bag this season isnt he? Literally in this case. 

His clothes are still scortched too which I find interesting.  The black eyes also staying. Auras not back up then? Aura repair and regen seems...werid half the time. Like RT does what they want with it.

Ah so someone finally says it...but at the same time what exactly does Salem have to fear? If she cant fight the whole world...what could they do? Maybe overwhelming her? It...Im having a hard time putting the “she cant be stopped” with “shes afraid of fighting all of Remnant”. 

Somethings missing here. I know it.

The sound of the “door” opening reminds me of the Flood doors in High Charity in Halo 3s Cortana. Fleshy twisting.

Mention from Hazel, but AGAIN...no details. I guess if you nail down how she can do stuff its harder to write? 

Glad someone made a comment on the futility of the Hunter academies. 

I really hate how Salems giving us creepy mommy shades. 

Hmm. So yeah the bridge IS the throne room/command deck. I like how Neo doesnt give a fuck is just casually kneeling. 

Ah okay THATS why he grabbed the scroll. 

Heh. Interesting. How exactly does this work I wonder. 

...Why does Salem have a ring. Has she always had that ring?

Neo looking at the Hound like “oh, I could ride this thing”. 

Oh cool the Ace Ops. And they’re arguing, shocker. Sounds like Elm doesnt trust tech either. No shock there.  Idiot.

Atlas elite. Yeah, right.

Huh, is this a Manta with landing gear? I guess they do have them...seems kind of silly to have them so high up though. I guess thats what the thing under the door is for, so they can deploy a ramp. Man, I really dont like Atlas’s airship design.

Hare needs some fuckin suppresants. 

Annnnddd...here we go, things go straight to hell. I was warned of this. I am going to try and not be mad...but from what Ive heard the incomptence of the military in this particular section is astronomical.

Huh. So...Grimm can be convirted into a rock-punching liquid? Interesting. Has that always been a thing or... Also why the fuck are you jsut standing there in awe, go kill the fucking thing! Fucking Specialists.

...that is all it took to get through Atlas’s shield? THAT?

I also love how no one does anything. Ironwoods like “wait what the fuck”. Come on bro. 

And...thats the Atlas navy. Everyone. Two lasers. One of which missed. Remind me again what exactly these things are used to shoot?

Wait, no, that took down part of it, and then the rest is, surprise, hitting the soft rock on the outside. 

THERE goes the shield. 

Hang on a second, how long have those giant squid things been there?

And...what. The whale just approaches, nothing happens? You’ve got 12 fucking ships there, shoot the fucking thing.

Again, WHY IS NO ONE DOING ANYTHING?

Oh, it just beach-headed. Okay fine, whatever. 

Im not really worried.

Lets see how RT makes this WORSE though...

And thats this weeks episode.

[misterbitches]

I cant decide if I think what happened this episode makes me mad at tae joo. 

me @ me...and ppl who may read what i write...lmao: hear me out. i am a black anarchist cis woman so like...not everyone is going to care or think about  stuff like this. i realize it may not be the total norm  yet (but hey black radicals burned down a fucking police station yesterday which is some real cool history so who is to say that i’m not.) with or without the norms, i share to get a grip of my own thoughts that ADHD absolutely won’t let me keep. and see what people have to say! maybe they’ll engage. otherwise,,,,,,,it doesnt matter i jsut love thinking it through. cos i am CONFUSED!!! 

(btw, i insult rich ppl through this whole thing and i dont give  a fuck. i repeat a lot of things too o well.)

the start of the ep has these words from tae joo:

i have a young friend. a shadow like being who doesn’t go away even at one o clock. that shadow grew a self. i have to do him the favor...

part of his like and attraction to guk  is because of that existing power imbalance. i, personally, think that is impossible to deny given  that we see it. a girl coming over to their house and he kisses her. he had to know that guk would see, or would be looking, whatever.

you have tae joo being surprised at interest in guk. not because guk isn’t attractive or whatever, but because he’s used to the one being noticed. he may not be as broad and tall (there’s not a huge difference but guk obviously stands out more visually, while tae joo stands out cos he’s him i guess lol.)

i think there may be an element of this cat and mouse game that he likes, but  guk takes it a lot more seriously. as he should because...it’s his job. we don’t know at what point they are so anything that happened previously but they very clearly like each other. 

i was gonna say it didn’t even have to be romantic—yet. just that feeling of i don’t need anyone else to take you. i’m curious about why tae joo likes pil hyun but maybe it has something to do with wanting a friend that isn’t necessarily one borne out of necessity. but pil hyun’s dad does work at tae joo’s father’s dumb company or whatever. he’s on the board? idk i forgot

but maybe neither of them really care and pil hyun is just a friend instead of someone you have deep admiration and romantic or strange love for. 

but then there’s a lot of cruelly selfish stuff that shows why this imbalance and their two different backgrounds hinders them. tae joo doesn’t want to lose this shadow anyway but guk is always there. where he’s supposed to be.

when tae joo said, “isn’t it boring just the two of us?” it’s just such a dumb fucking question to ask. he was either just being verbally careless or did it on purpose. it can be both, but i don’t think it was supposed to be. for every one side of a you need to see him as a person not a workerr also encourage him to fuckng quit and live your lives together outside of your stupid rich father coin there’s a he obviously wants and needs him as much if not more. 

the if not more part comes to mean (to me) dependency formed UPON guk’s job. were they not to be in this circumstance, how would their paths cross? 

honestly the show poses a lot of class dilemma for something so short. now is the time to do and write interesting things and question capitalism anyways. tae joo can’t have everything handed  to him. well he can have a lot, because he’s privileged to be where he is, but love isn’t one of those things. guk is not obligated to love him fiercely if tae joo can’t truly relinquish his hold.

the last scene pissed me off a lot at first and thinking about it  it still does. like you used the master-servant relationship comment and exploited it because you didn’t like it but it’s the truth. what is the point of guk sitting through your bullshit but when you intentionally go seek him out you can insert yourself.

hye mi saying, “hey we’re talking can u wait yr turn” like YEA. they’re talking, you came in and had a fit, and only someone who has a life like you do would do something like that. was guk making noise while you were being tutored? 

i also honestly would just quit if i were guk. not every1 is gonna be an annoying anarchist like me or whatever but that’s pretty much the only way this could sustain itself. that and tae joo respecting guk as a person not just a person he loves in his orbit. the world revolves around us as individuals. meaning we think about ourselves in relation to everyone else because we live in this body. so guk is allowed to center himself in his own life.

this could all be avoided if it crossed tae joo’s mind that guk is allowed space to feel whatever his emotions without being dictated. where it isn’t just sparring that he can say whatever the fuck. 

so remember the opening. well, here’s the last lines of thought tae joo had in the car: i have a bodyguard a shadow like being that shouldn’t go away even at one o clock. the shadow isn’t supposed to have a self. 

he called the shadow his friend. a shadow has no self so when it finds autonomy — as he is finding himself (guk),  guk walks ahead of taejoo, faceless with the camera focused on the shadow itself—we finally start to see him as the shadow shows its human form. it’s never been a shadow, guk has always been a person, his own person, it’s just that and this  is literally....he is owned by his job. imagine realizing you have the same tendency as your own dad to feel that way (btw this is also with him (guk) getting slapped by his dad and no......nothing)

in the car we see that selfishness that wasn’t buried but he never thought about. guk shouldn’t leave, he should always be behind him, a shadow, he isn’t supposed to dictate his own life, his life must revolve around me. because he’s transient, again. workers are disposable, a dime a dozen, you happen to love this dime but it doesn’t mean you have  been able to fight for it or understand it.

tae joo is rich (i don’t know if it’s new or old money and the distinction would matter a little but i’m pretty sure theyve been together for a long while? bitch idk) the boy he loves is employed by his father. his father is a CEO, a boss and truly the worst kind (FIRE! YOUR! BOSS!) tae joo has been told his whole life that he deserves. why fight capitalism and not understand his own richness? it’s beneficial to him and it gave him guk, right? 

and you see how allllllllllll of that, the messaging, the receiving, how you get stuck under the influence as a younger person to be stuck under the influence as a complicit adult to the messages of the ruling class. the ruling class you are a part of whether you like it or not, the one that calls labor your own, the one that rips power from other people. you didn’t choose who you were born from and to, but you get to choose what you do now. 

guk was never a shadow, you just didn’t see him because, well, he’s your best friend, and your bodyguard, working and being a literal punching bag for your mistakes (AND THAT’S CAPITALISM BABY, THEY RLY TOLD US THAT THERE—”for your mistakes, i’ll beat him and then send you off to england” like gorl...)

(i also want to mention i whole heartedly believe that the rich resent the poor, the ruling class punish the working class, etc but that’s like irrelevant to here mostly...by irrelevant i mean i shouldnt go any fucking deeper than i have with goddamn dumb analysis. but it’s fun kinda) 

anyway basically tae joo like made so many mistakes that show just how fucking clueless you can be when you have immense privilege. coupled with guk working for him, he doesn’t realize that guk doesn’t live to work. has his own thoughts and he has feelings man. when guk said “stop” in e3 i was rly happy tbh. yea, they may like each other but doing shit like that isn’t fair to him if you’re gonna go around and be really flighty about everything while he depends on (well maybe not depend must cater to) you almost completely by DEFAULT of u being rich lmao

this is just a look and critique into one side of tae joo. i don’t dislike him but i question why people both in the show and people discussing feeling bad for tae joo’s circumstance instead of asking why guk  has to do any of this.....? how does guk fucking feel about this? where are guk’s feelings factored in. like we’re all saying “we pay you so that should be enough.” fuck no. guk do what you want.

if the show was about like....people in love not meeting at the right time in their lives i wouldnt be too upset either. as long as we know their love was deep and romantic it’s okay to see a parting. of course i would prefer not to see that and just want tae joo and guk to grow up to become nice anarchist citizens. guk is an artist and tae joo writes books about his daddy issues or sth like that

[vestrits]

ive already pretty much liveblogged everything on twitter BUT i like to keep track of these dumb things so here is a quick recount of what happened on my trip:

> plan: go to spain, then rome to meet friend > is in spain. meets my bestie & stays at his flat, BUT my bestie is in a pinch bc he has no job & his flatmate tells me that on saturday they might give a party if he finds sth > he does > me (against friend): ‘what a shame looool i rlly want to stay now ugh’ > him: ‘yea well but u already paid right’ me: ‘yea i cant just change my fight ha ha ha’ > literally 2 seconds later: ‘not to be impulsive or anything but im 100% checking flights and here’s one on sunday lol’

> yaaaaay i surprise friend

MEANWHILE AT NIGHT i have a dream abt the flatmate kissing me and hes 100% nice and i wake up going ‘oh no’  bc he’s not my type but suddenly i Notice him aka RIP ian’s aloof cool self, u will now Die because

my brain: PUSHES THE REVERSE HAREM AUTOPILOT MODE BUTTON

> catches glimpse of him out of the shower in the morning, shirtless, runs into the fkcing door > drops phone, a water boiler, a plate, idk what else but IT WAS BAD I DROPPED EVERYTHING LITERALLY EVERYTHING > i need his pc so i went to ask if i could use it, SURPRISE BITCH he’s in the bathroom, SHIRTLESS, opens it, me ‘o-oh oops’ ‘no no sfine what do u need’ (has to lean in and whisper so friend doesnt hear) (dies) > gets super self-conscious when he sits next to me, against me, during the fcking films we watch in the evening > INCREDIBLY easily startled at EVERYTHING  > stumbles 54789 times in front of him or not in front of him, hits head every time im in the kitchen, > manages to fuck up cooking RICE

me: ok fine so im into him now FINE I GUESS

> commence operation ‘ian tries not to be a cowardly hoe’

> gets fkcing tipsy on the last night just so i can muster my courage and REALLLY lean against him (i dont rlyl remember this part except that i reached for his hand twice when i got jumpy) > since 45687 of my friends told me to do something that thought remained prevalent the entire night so my tipsy ass, after receiving a generous amount of 3 hugs, goes up to him and goes ‘can i-- touch your HAIR--’ and meep meep red alert i want to get out of there after realising that was NOT right so i awkwardly pat it and gtfo after mumbling more nonsense

> i was supposed to get a flight that morning but me + tipsy + my fUCKING PERIOd + 2HRS OF SLEEP = i wake up with a fever and nausea; IM NOT GETTING ON A PLANE LIKE THAT so i cancel my plan to go to rome and extend my stay in spain YET AGAIN

> also wants to die bc at least i wouldnt have had to face him after the awkward phrase but NOPE > 5 hrs later i wake again and my pal is at his work so its me all alone in the kitchen and i barely manage to keep the dishes alive, flatmate shows up super confused as to why im still here and ehhrhrh ANYWAY

anyway

> i finally tell my bestie in spain that i seem to have a thing for his flatmate > ‘yes i think its obvious hahah’ SSSSHHHHUT UP I WANNA DIE > ‘u should try something’ commence stage 2 of the plan > SUCCEEDS in holding onto his arm even tho it was only the last 10ish minutes of the film (we watch a film every night) > during the day, nothing tho > doesheevenlikeit.png > the final night: HE MAKES THE FIRST MOVE angel choirs are singing i am blessed and can leave in peace > the end

ish. im still dead bc i wrote him a thank u note for keeping up with my awkward shy self and drew a fat cat on it and totally made it weird i bet and i want to fucking die again bc now im thinking ‘WHAT IF HE WAS JSUT PITYING ME’ (very likely) and uhhh yeah anyway im going back in february to hopefully have a blast again bc ALL THIS ASIDE it was rlyl fun and i feel really proud of myself for being able to try sth EVEN THO IT WAS THE MOST AWKWARD THING EVER 

> basically this entire video probably happened to me

[chikotos]

speaking of That my mom is finally recognizing that when I say “i dont feel good” it doesnt mean i have a cold or sth its that Uh, im probably experiencing suicidal thoughts and cant express it well (or at least smth along those lines) and my house has been dirty cuz i havent cleaned in a while or i cant keep it clean and she n my sister cleaned an area and i repeatedly told her not to bc shes always using my sister to do things im not adequate enough to do on time and its rlly not fair to her even if she doesnt realize it cuz like shes only 12 & we dont ever even talk so she shouldnt have to take care of someone 5 years older than her.. and i was gonna clean but I basically slept all day so i could just clean alone at night when I feel safe to walk around the house . i wasnt even tired idk why i slept but now im eerily awake and maybe will be umless i force myself to sleep

its so lonely here and thats only hit me like this year cuz all the time before I would go through periods of hanging out after school maybe.. twice a year? and only hanging out with one person whod have many friends but theyd b my only friend which is a problem i tend to have. but it jst got to the point where im realizing, i think cuz i was in my schools drama program n exposed to lots of friendships, that im jst like ,really fucking lonely. Which is unfortunate because ive always been such an internal person at home and have been able to work creatively but thats all like leaving me? art doesnt make me happy anymore because i dislike my art so much and havent had a platform to share it in so long and i guess I thrive on other ppls opinions of it? and I definitely cant write anymore. I havent been able to zone in on an interest in MONTHS and thats left me creatively drained, a lot. 

I think im starting to rlly, RLLY redirect my complete attention from interests to ppl (which always ends well am i right lads) and it isnt fair to ppl who like, have others and need space and time etc or Uh, dont even know me. but its like a switch like , I can either be creative or i can feel loved and Boy Howdy, do i need both,

its just weird cuz im the only one in my family thats emoitonal like this and I think thats why i feel so isolated. like im not exxagerating when I say my dad has 0 friends tht arent family. my mom has work friends she will hang out with maybe 4 times a year not for work, but shes always complaining abt social situations which I can understand. maybe my siblings r like that too but my sisters young n focuses on minecraft n stuff n hangs out w friends more than me n we barely know each other so its not like id know, maybe my half brother is but whens the last time hes wanted to talk to me right. like i cry all the time and all it does is make my dad angry at memfor being incompetent and make my mom think its her fault and my sister confused and jst takes up everyones time

and its jst all v strange. like i was kinda raised 2 not have friends, inadvertantly i guess. i can remember my mom trying to make me feel better about something along the lines of u can b okay w/out friends if u have family but she jst told me friends dont matter and im never gonna talk to ppl i meet at my age as an adult, so it stuck w/ me and i started to make moral judgements on ppl on small things we could talk out like say, they use homophobic language sometimes but im sure theyd respect me enough to stop, but id make those judgements before we could befriend each other n take a chance, kinda to protect myself from attachments? but later in life ive found ppl who dont do stuff like that, and thats when i focus in on them im an unfair way to them and they r the only person/group of ppl in my life, etc etc and idk how to stop because im so scared of hanging out w/ most ppl alone i guess? but ill still be here, thinking about like example (namedrop bc he doesnt have me tumblr anyways) my friend jacob tht never hung out w/ me outside of school but i fuccin loved that kid n he just stopped talking to me over the summer n ignored my text i send first day of summer and now we see each other and talk briefly but its like he wont let us be friends anymore and smth like this always happens and its So

and tbh how can i expect it to not happen when i limit myself so much n they will have plenty of other close close friends when i dont? and i think ive gotten better but idk anymore. 

and uh, unrelated. I think my dog ive had for 12 years may have to end up being put down this year. hes got cataracts in both eyes and skin diseases and back problems and teeth problems (hes inbred) and hes losing his hearing too and for the past two weeks hes been peeing everywhere and we can let him out but he cant climb stairs anymore n he has to walk them to get to our yard and im the only one w/ the patience to pick him up (hes only 8 pounds) n put him in the yard bc my parents will jst scream at him n my sister doesnt like dogs and hes got seperation issues w me and whines when he cant be in my room which is the farthest from the door out n stuff. and its like rlly stressful my mom will scream at him in front of my sister n brother n me and the other day she said my dad grabbed him by the neck and threw him out on the concrete cuz he peed inside and hes so tiny that thats just gonna make everyting worse and its notmlike i can stop them bc why would anyone listen to me and hed prob b fine for s few more years if he lived in a patient house with ppl who would take him to the vet but theyre prob gonna put him down early snd its gonna b so weird w/out him

when i showered earlier i took s razor with me w/ the intent to cut my thighs, and i did a little, but i never ever draw blood wnd its strange. why am i given these urges when im so fucking terrified of blood. itll still leave marks n stuff but it makes me feel weak ? n ill bruise myself up instead but its never the same. and im such an advocate for help w self harm but i cant for myself. its like i subconsciously want 2 get caught ? idk. i did throw my razor away though and the others i have r rusty and im not THAT much of a dumbass so i dont have options to self harm anymore unless i get new ones. lifehack

and uh lol, having no schedule n it being summer my eating habits r SHIT. it always hurts to eat p much, its at different times n most of the time i just snck only or i dont eat for hours n see black spots n stuff. and when i dont eat its not a body image thing (im nt rlly happy w my nody but its not sth not eating will help with) its cuz i dknt wanna go upstairs for food where my dad is n the snacks r downstairs so its easier, or cuz i forget or cuz i like, want to punish myself? but im too lazy to self harm. its weird

n since ive stopped id’ing as ace officially my internalized lesbophobia has gotten so much worse . im so repressed and lost ans sad, nothinng rly makes sense? I either fall in love w/ anyone who flirts with me or i focus on someone who ill never fucking talk to or see again and imagine countless scenarios n set myself up to b sad. i seek validation from ppl on it but nothhing comes out right or i just cant say it, because other than when i make myself the butt of gay jokes i just cant sven get the words out of my throat that im gay cuz im jst so ashamed and disgusted with myself. ive been looking at pictures of guys lately cuz ive been trying to force myself to like them. back when i thought i was pan it always felt safer bc i could always just love a cis guy or whatever and everything would b okay for my family ykno. and its such a shameful thing for me bc my irl friends who im out to, most see me as v confident abt it at least a little bc im loud abt it u kno, and make all sorts of jokes, and i jst know so many would b surprised or like sad abt that

i want to stop liking girls so much. like holy shit. i have so many straight girl friends and i hate it when they flirt with me because lik, none r my type so i feel nothing but then i feel like i shiuld then feel like No i shouldnt then feel like i shouldnt even be around them bc im a gross disgusting creepo dyke predator. n they always use the excuse of me having a gf so its fine id never hit on them well like, now im single so i have to be DOUBLE careful not to b affectionate w them as im w all my friends and itsssssssssssssmjshfjhdjfhsjdhjshdjshdjhsjdhsjhdjshdk

and i like, think abt this girl alot n yea its romantic even thomwe never fucking talked n rlly i do that w lots of girls and its making me lose out on friendships bc i wanna b their friends somehow bc i think theyre very cool n stuff but i cant stop hodling on to stupid daydreams n idealizations i get to distract me when im sad n its jst stupid like i know its dumb but guess whos boutta keeeeeeppppp doin it??!!!!! boy!!!

and i try so damn hard to talk feeling out, n talk abt who im attracted to n stuff w ppl, n i try so hard to gush but i cant cuz smth comes outta my mouth and then i cant speak past that and no one ends up rlly knowing how i feel, bc ANY time i talk abt anytingngay related abt me its what happens. and i listen to others talking abt tht stuff and i jsut get so god damn JEALOUS bc idk how to express myself 

all these inadequacies n shit is making it rlly hard to see how,im gonna b on my own n its always been like this. at TWELVE YEARS OLD i came to fhe fucking conclusion that i was just gonna kill myself when i turned 18 so i didnt have to deal with all this and i was OKAY WITH IT and i just went through life knowing that and hiding it and so rarely questioning my inevitable suicide as a childc so instead of dealing with all that n my problems n getting better i let myself get worse cuz uh, fuck it right

idk its all just occured to me how im not a fully functioning human being, in seberal if not all aspects of my life, its weird. now that I actively want to live and realize i uh Kinda have to simce ill b the legal guardian of my brother its all very scary

sorr i was all over the place and all the typos i didnt mean anyof them n im not crytyping like, i cried a bit but i jst hate typing kn thsi shitty tablet keyboard, n dont wanna spellcheck. if u read through comgratulations also please dont message me abt like the self harm junk n my dog n stuff like, whatever ur abt to say. I Know my guy 

time to go uhhhhhhhhhhh daydream about impossible gay shit with guilt in the back of my mind

[gh0stpkmn]

ok uh. yooran gaming channel au - part 2

@misfireezreal reblogged the ‘yoosung has a gaming channel au’ post and wrote a really cute lil addition that inspired me to add some more ideas to this mess of an au..... and i got really carried away

their addition / reblog post is here !!  tho i’ll also put a screenshot of it under the cut... along with more headcanons/ideas/whatever for the au/scenario

 god this is so cute omfg. ok so..

●  yoosung liking comments that say nice things abt saeran?? so good. honestly the sweet comments probably rlly do a lot of good things for saeran’s self esteem!! they cheer him up when he’s feelin sad i would think? definitely helps a lot on his rougher days.

●  misfireezeal mentioned donations so i started thinking about what donation money would go towards... when theyre not goin towards yoosung’s tuition (if he even stays in university at this point?? idk??)  or his cost of living, or equipment for the channel, they go to charities.

yoosung wants to help animals so they donate to animal rescue organizations and stuff like that. he wants to contribute help to other causes too so... he wants saeran to have some say where the money goes (and i mean saeran is the meme bringin in a lot of it so. ye.)

it’s important to saeran that they donate to organizations that provide help for mentally ill people--especially mentally ill youth. also organizations that help children in foster care or like... help kids that have been abused idk.. idk! idk...  things that can help young people that are going through some of the same things saeran went through

yoosung doesn’t announce the donations or anything because like... he doesn’t really feel the need to???? neither of them see a point in posting/talking about it. it just feels good to do nice things.

other stuff:

●  it comes up in passing that like. saeran as a knack for hacking and everyone’s like “how could u do this?? cant believe ur a dirty hacker”

saeran’s like “ lol dont worry. i only cheat at games when i play against my brother because he’s a shit and never plays fair ”

chat is like “whoa we didn’t know you had a brother!!!”

and they talk about it a little and yoosung is like “yeah his brother is ____”  (whatever his username is? i forget. hacker god i think?)  “he usually plays on the shooting star server “

viewers are Shocked that yoosung knows #1 on shooting star. they demand to have him as a guest star

it’s... debatable whether saeyoung agrees to it or not?? he has to lay low and stuff.. either way, they tell saeyoung about it and he’s so amused omfg. he watches yoosung and saeran’s streams sometimes (and is so proud of his bro. he cries probably) but not super often? when he does watch, he also uses a random throwaway name

but after the chat asks for him, he logs in once or twice w/ his LOLOL screen name and people are all over omfg. chat goes wild and saeyoung is Living for the attention omg

saeran is like “you’re so dumb god i hate you”

and saeyoung’s like. “ok but are you actually planning on coming home some time soon??? tomorrow maybe? becaaauuuuuse..... i miss you”

it’s cheesy and lame and Embarrassing. saeran’s just.. “GO AWAY asshole im doing a thing....................................... also, yes. please order pizza for dinner”

yoosung thinks its funny n cute and so do the viewers.

●  and ok even if... saeyoung is never a guest star, they probably bring like. mc or zen on once or twice and it’s great. a lot of viewers recognize zen (i imagine he’s a bit more famous at this point) and they are... so excited and surprised that he’s friends w/ yoosung and saeran.

i can’t really see jaehee or jumin on the show but like..........

..... the idea of them tricking jumin into trying to play a video game on the stream is so fucking funny to me????

like Somehow they manage to convince him to come over?? idk maybe by asking him to  ”help them work on a big project that’s essential to yoosung’s career” or smth “that requires nothing less than jumin han’s skill and expertise”  and because he’s a good friend he agrees. then they just. put a controller in his hand and he’s like “what am i supposed to do with this”

and ok jumin has probably owned a gaming console at some point but i honestly, truly can’t bring myself to believe that he uses it for anything other than like.....netflix

so he has no fucking experience and it’s. so good. yoosung and saeran are trying really hard not to laugh (and yoosung is failing)

idk what they make him play specifically but for some reason wii sports is flashing through my mind holy shit..... but actually its probably LOLOL or fallout 4 or something. idk. either way, he’s bad at it and they struggle to teach him how to even hold the controller properly

●  saeran likely moves in some time after they’ve started the channel where both of them play games together. which happened pretty far into the relationship anyways i think?

and even then it happens quite a while after they start the channel. maybe when it’s been going for a year or something? maybe two??

(i have no idea???? idk how long these kinds of channels stay big??? i only watch like... fairly well known youtubers like game grumps that have been around for a long time. and mcleroy stuff on polygon idk.)

anyways

how they decide to move in is basically like... ok.

i imagine they probably get questions about their relationship a lot when they come out as a couple or when new viewers first find out about them. the flow of questions dies down after the initial reveal that they’re together but they still pop up every now and then

sometimes the questions get slightly intrusive like asking about their plans for the future which they kinda just ignore those until it becomes a really frequently asked question so they Have to answer it.. so they just say they don’t feel comfortable talking about it for the time being (because tbh they dont know lol)

and so...

probably a specific question that people ask A LOT (and have since saeran’s early appearances)  is if saeran lives with yoosung, or if he’s planning to.

because he’s at yoosung’s place so often. he has been since the channel’s early days, and they post videos and stream together fairly regularly, i guess?

there’s obviously more content of just yoosung doing his thing because it is his channel after all but content featuring saeran is definitely a frequent thing (even when it’s not their duo let’s play channel or whatever... saeran can still be seen in the background in a fair amount of yoosung’s usual LOLOL streams, too. )

so uh

at some point they’re just hanging out.. (off stream, not on video or anything. just them together.. like a date night or just to spend some time together. i dunno)

maybe cuddlin’ in bed or on the couch watching a movie, having a nice time. there’s comfortable silence

and yoosung never really gave it a lot of thought before, but lately... he and saeran are just really close and their relationship is so GOOD and he loves him a lot. he’s thinking over all this stuff and how often people ask if they live together and...

i mean, he thought about it on his own before he really took the viewers’ questions seriously.... them bringing it up isn’t what sparked it necessarily. 

he considered the possibility before, but he was always scared that bringing up moving in together would be too forward or pushy, and that saeran wasn’t ready for it, and that they would be rushing into things--going too fast. yeah. 

he got that ball rollin’ and was trying to take it slow but recently, everyone bringing the idea up jsut. fuckin. kicks that ball. so hard. it’s going full fuckin throttle. max speed. it’s out of control and he can’t stop it

and so in this... really comfortable quiet moment he just kinda blurts out

“why haven’t we moved in together yet?”

saeran is surprised obviously. he wasn’t expecting that at all

he has briefly entertained the idea of living with yoosung before, because he’s over so often anyways, and he wants to spend even more time together.... but he’s also scared for various reasons? 

such as his mental health issues, obviously. he’s also anxious that yoosung will get sick of him, or that he won’t be able to handle being around yoosung 24/7 and vice versa. he doesn’t want to get so easily annoyed and snappy like he does at home with saeyoung? he also doesn’t want to rush into things. idk. there’s a lot more reasons but those are some of them.

so when yoosung says this, he has no idea how to react??? so he just kinda mumbles “oh... uh.......”

yoosung panics like

 “god, im sorry, that was so stupid. um. it’s just... been on my mind a lot lately, i guess..? god! ah... forget about that! it was dumb...”  

he covers his eyes and kinda... hunches over. all embarrased and nervous and a little guilty because he doesn’t want to make saeran uncomfortable. he can’t even look at him. poor boy omg

saeran stays quiet for a long time, furrows his brows and chews the nail of his thumb and looks like he’s concentrating on something. after a while he pipes up, so quietly that yoosung can barely hear him

“i don’t think it’s dumb”

yoosung is. shocked. but also immediately hopeful! he perks up!!! looks at his bf incredulously like “you don’t?” 

saeran kinda... talks slowly bc he’s thinking hard about his words and says that he didn’t expect yoosung to bring it up really but he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about it before

so they have an Important, Serious conversation about it and they both make sure that the other is %100 on board with it and ready to just. jump in and do it.

celebratory smooches ensue because they’re cute and happy and excited.

... i forget if yoosung’s place is a dorm or not. if it is, he gets his own apartment.

if it’s not, he stays in his apartment and saeran moves in there.

it’s small and kinda cramped and very far from a “forever home” but they make it work for now!! they’re happy that way... (maybe in the future they get a bigger place, which is nice because it makes it easier for saeran to have some privacy when he needs time alone.)

●  yoosung definitely takes short little videos or vlogs all the time and posts them on youtube and other social media

he takes one the day after they have the conversation mentioned above. and it’s just. “you guys.... i asked my boyfriend to move in and he said yes!! god, i was so scared! tell them how scared i was, saeran!” he points the camera at saeran who is reading a book and he just. 

idk he either just flips off the camera bc he’s busy and doesn’t want to be disturbed...

or

he looks it right at the lens and says “he was scared shitless. he literally shit his pants. it was gross. i had to h---” 

cue video going blurry as yoosung turns the camera away real quick paired with. shocked, loud shrieking. “SAERAN!!! DON’T SAY----” and then the video jsut kinda. cuts off there. 

(he still posts it but with some caption along the lines of “that didn’t actually happen. saeran’s just being a dick”)

and of course, there’s definitely multiple videos of the day they move saeran’s stuff in. yoosung records a bunch and puts them on his snapchat story or w/e... other social media too, so they can look back on them later... 

just cute little clips, like one of saeran’s room with all his stuff in boxes..... one of saeyoung and saeran (and maybe mc) loading stuff up into the car.... one of them putting the boxes in yoosung’s apartment....  a dumb one of saeyoung goofin’ off at yoosung’s place and mc doting on him..

one of saeyoung giving his brother the biggest bear hug ever. just. completely squeezing the life out of him and dramatically pretending to be all emotional (even tho he really is genuinely emotional inside omg) and saeran being annoyed and trying to push him away “god, let me go! you’re suffocating me!”

one where... they’re bringing in the last box.

and finally like. one w/ yoosung turning around to show his whole apartment, boxes everywhere, some of them already half unpacked. “phew... finally finished! the hardest part, anyway”

it’s cute.

●  the little videos are probably a thing that happens every now and then, even after that... he probably snapchats a lot of things in general bbbut a lot of the time it’s just. dumb, random videos of saeran.

some of them are stuff like:

 a close-up of both of them, taken with yoosung’s phone where they’re like “streaming in fifteen! we’re gonna play ____ today.” .... real cute stuff.

or just. shitty phone videos yoosung takes of saeran where like… yoosung says something really sappy joke or pickup line? idk. something really cheesy and terrible and wants to film saeran’s reaction.  and saeran looks over and his expression is just. dead inside. the camera zooms in real close on his face and he whispers “………………. im so sick of this Shi–”  the video cuts off there

probably lots of them chillin and having fun with the whole rfa crew

and. maybe one where the two of them are hanging out with saeyoung and mc and other pals and.. idk. one of them says something funny and they’re all laughing but yoosung zooms in on saeran who just.........ok i imagine that sometimes his more subdued laughs come out as like?? this huffy, kinda wheezy little giggle. he covers his mouth w his hand. and the video captures that. when yoosung posts it, ppl Freak out about it because it’s so uncharacteristically adorable...

there’s videos of them going on trips or just new places in general... going for hikes and exploring maybe.. idk. lots of cute stuff.

saeran takes one of yoosung when they’re at the spca?? or some place like that. idk (i dont like pet stores but maybe a pet store).. and.. yoosung just has his hands and face pressed to a glass partition/window/whatever that has a puppy behind it. maybe multiple puppies. and yoosung turns around w/ the Most desperate, pleading expression anyone has ever seen. (saeran knows he has to say no but it’s so hard omfg)

and obviously there’s lots of little clips of video game stuff. teasers of the game content itself or their playthroughs. maybe a video of one of them sitting on the couch or a computer chair playing a game and getting angry lol.... (or saeran getting frustrated w/ a handheld game that’s supposed to be really calm like... animal crossing. idk sorry i just love the idea of saeran having a 3ds and playing chill games like that to help him relax when he’s anxious omg)

.... there’s also lil videos yoosung takes but he decides that they are private, for his eyes only... little moments like one where they’re getting ready to stream and saeran’s adjusting one of the microphones 

and yoosung quietly says hey to get his attention, and saeran looks over and smiles real big and genuine w/ lots of love and tells him to “Stop goofing around. C’mon, put your phone down and help me finish setting up.” and it’s. sweet and happy and cute... yeah.

.

BUT uh...

yeah!

that’s all for now !!

[ghostlenin]

The Ballad of Andy Richter

Speaking of things that wouldn’t fit on twitter, here’s what happened the last time we played dnd. I bring this up because while I like to do cool things in-game, I’m usually not the star of the show. But I was here, so here we go.

Background: we’re going through the Tales from the Yawning Portal book (watch out, I’m going to be spoiling the first two dungeons), hitting up all these classic dungeons now that they’ve been ported to fifth. I rolled up a stone sorcerer named Andy Richter, who at some point in the past washed up naked on the beach with no prior memory, clutching a magic notebook. The idea was he’s the latest in a long line of Andys Richter, clones made and set upon the world by some cosmic being who uses these clones to learn about the world.

Prologue: Goltheas Tree

It takes the group (me, a rogue, a fighter, a cleric, and a wizard) a couple sessions to get to the bottom of the Sunless Citadel where we’re set upon by a bunch of twig blights and the corrupted remains of a previous adventuring party and a crazy druid. Fight’s going pretty well, Andy’s charged ahead and then in a Blaze of Glory (I played the song on youtube as I did this), I rounded the corner, twinned my Burning Hands to finish off the bad wizard and bad druid, then quickspelled Scorching Ray (I think) to plink the bad paladin/fighter guy. I then go down, but we win.

Cue looting the room and investigating around. There’s this gross necromagical tree in the back, we burn it down (the wizard and I loved burning everything down, Fire Bolt ftw). Underneath the tree there’s a skeleton impaled by a wooden stake with all kinds of runes carved in it, so of course I snatch it up. The wizard is able to read it and wants to get it back to Waterdeep right quick, and after we resolve the adventuring hook for the dungeon, that���s what we do.

Turns out, these high wizards are impressed by what’s on the old stick, but also angry with us (me) for taking it without burning the skeleton, because that stake was the only thing binding an elder vampire god elf guy (Goltheas) and now we can assume he’s loose. Whoops, lol.

Anyway, we figure we’ll deal with that later and go head off to the Forge of Fury and spend a couple sessions working through the Moon Door into the Glitterhame. I was absent for the second of those sessions where our cleric straight up died from kiting like 17 orcs. He since rolled up a halfling gunslinger that rides a dog.

Part 1: The Cut Scene

Before we continued exploring the Glitterhame, our DM, the fantastic CK, said we were going to have a little cut-scene encounter with some throw-away characters the wizard’s player rolled up.

They’re a bit higher level than us, and all have great flavor, and we rp the hell out of them. Relevant bits: I was a half-orc troll barbarian raised by an elf (played by the wizard’s player) who was in love with our goody-two-shoes dwarf fighter leader who had a magical primordial unicorn horn.

Surprise, surprise, our job is to go into the Sunless Citadel and bring back the bodies our normal group was supposed to recover but never did (whoops, lol).

We pick up the scene at the entrance to the end cavern where the big boss fight and tree were. My character is hearing a voice in my head (the evil demon trapped on the first floor of the dungeon who wants someone to make a Wish so he can get out) and there’s a bunch of creepy bodies suspended from the ceiling.

Cue a really hard fight with 4 or 5 vampires. We’re not doing so hot until the paladin starts smiting things so their regeneration won’t kick in from the radiant damage. We get a strategy: pally lights em up with radiance, then I barbarian the hell outta them. We kill 2 of them I think before we hear a wave of giant rats scurrying towards us from the back with Goltheas the vampire lord surfing them. The fight’s getting pretty hairy now and we don’t have many smites left.

My dwarf crush gets hit hard and I tell the group I have a plan and shout a Wish into the cavern (my half-orc wasn’t that smart, but he does pay attention):

I wish that all of the intelligent beings in this cavern were teleported to the plane of radiance!

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See, cuz I knew radiant damage was bad for the vampires, but our good guy pally made it, so it couldn’t be all that bad, right?

At first the DM was like, well, you all die. Way faster to TPK than I thought! But then as we were roleplaying our slow agonizing deaths taking 1d8 radiant damage per turn until we die, we decided wait now–let’s just try to finish these jerks off, so we did.

While raging, my character was taking half damage and knew he’d outlast all his friends so I just charged Goltheas, did a bunch of damage. My dwarf crush figured why not and blew her primordial unicorn horn, summoning a unicorn buddy to help us out in the fight. The smiting paladin hopped on its back and started charging all the vamps. We killed off all the mobs while our characters started dying from the every-round damage. First my orc’s dad died, then the warlock. Goltheas had an action where he could jsut escape if it looked like it was going poorly, but had to do it on his turn, so we all charged him. The paladin, riding the unicorn, charged and burned his last two smites–with max radiant damage since we were on the plane–and did like 77! damage in one hit between the unicorn goring the vampire and his warhammer smites. Goltheas died died died. It was glorious.

After the fight, the DM told us he had a plan for Goltheas, that after he escaped, he was going to hunt down every Andy Richter clone in the multiverse, slowly coming for mine, but those plans got derailed. I decided then that a big part of Andy’s story was to continually mess everything up, but go on oblivious while everyone else cleaned up after him.

Part 2: The Deck

After a food break, we went to our regularly scheduled dungeon crawling in the Glitterhame. We killed a bearowl and a couple trogs, then found a magic door with a word puzzle on it. We solved it–but not before a couple people slipped in the river and almost fell down a giant hole–and inside on an alter was a Deck of Many Things.

Now, if you’re unfamiliar, the Deck of Many Things is a stupidly powerful artifact that’s been in dnd for ages. It’s made up of a bunch of cards and when a character draws them, crazy powerful things happen. So a few of us did.

The rogue drew and got 50,000gp worth of jewelry. For those counting, that is a staggering amount of wealth–if you have about 125gp in your pocket in a town you can buy pretty much anything you need except for powerful magic items. It’s so much money what she got.

I decided Andy would draw, since his prime directive is to experience as much of everything as he can. So I drew and got… the Fool, which is one of the two worst cards in there. I immediately lost a level–and we were just on the cusp of going from 3 to 4 by a few dozen xp–and had to draw again. Perfect, I thought, this is going to shake out more or less evenly. And then I drew the Void, which is the actual worst card in the deck. Andy’s body goes immediately limp as his soul is transported into some unknown object at some unknown location anywhere in the world (or multiverse for that matter).

Whoops, lol.

Thanks to Placebo Comics for the image.