#its hard to separate them. they love each other. theyd destroy one another. toxic ass yuri.

[opal-owl-flight]

Parallel Dreaming.

I think its so damning that both 3 and 4 relied on some digital medium to fulfill that mutual desire they have to be close to each other again.

But while 3's main barrier is their self-loathing not allowing themself to seek 4 out again, 4s barrier is the fact that 3 has changed into someone she doesnt recognize -- a person who seems to not want her around anymore.

(More under the cut abt why 4 lets herself get taken over!)

Gone were the days when they were so close that the two are frequently found standing so physically close to each other. 3 making slight brushes on 4s arm or shoulder to direct her attention somewhere. 4 holding their hand and dragging them off to someplace interesting or worth investigating.

What happened? A space sits between them now, silence impenetrable. When 3 speaks (beyond duty), its as if their words were even more reserved than before.

Did something so intense happen that they wear this melancholy on their sleeve much more evidently? Why are they clamming up like they did when they first met? Why arent they telling her anything? Are they....trying to push her away? again?

She failed something one time and its like they never believed in her strength anymore.

...is she simply not good enough for them?

So she dreams in the memverse, long and tender, of perfection. Of 3 seeing her, believing in her. Of 3 being warm with her like they were in times past.

Rougher training sessions, 3s constant criticism and disappointed looks, and this new cold distance they maintain with her these days certainly make her believe that thought.

They said they did all this to keep her safe. But it hurts, it hurts so much, shes not sure she wants to take them at their word anymore. Yet she tries to. Clings to the idea that maybe shes in the wrong, that this is for her betterment. That she deserved nothing more than this.