#its either gonna be some art or their fatal flaws who knows

[honorarypines]

Losers Club x PJO AU thoughts part 1

since we have seven members of the Losers Club and seven main demigods in heroes of Olympus, I decided to make an au!!

Beverly Marsh -> daughter of Aphrodite, since she's super pretty and into fashion. She grew up with her human dad, and he was just as terrible as in the canon. The only explanation as to how he managed to pull a goddess, I think his agressiveness reminded her of Ares. Due to her good looks Bev was often sexualized and slut shamed by her classmates, before she got to the camp. She lowkey hates her godly parent. In the camp she tries her best to not stand out in any way, maybe aside from upgrading her camp outfit with some cool handmade accessories. She has the power of charmspeak, her weapon of choice is either a sling like in the books or a spear like in the movies, it's yet to be decided.

Richie Tozier -> son of Dionysus, for obvious reasons. Even the actor that plays mr D in the show looks like some dystopian bad future version of Rich where he didn't end up famous of something. Richie grew up with his mom, who was very sweet and protective of her son. He had really hard time in school due to his hardcore adhd and dyslexia. Most of his teacher never gave him a chance, bc they already labeled him as the troublemaker kid. Mrs Tozier sent Rich to camp out of free will, no unhappy tragic accidents here. When he got to the camp he quickly got along with most of the Hermes kids, and at one point got claimed by Mr D. Though Richie claims he's such a tough bad boy, he's actually a sweet kid and he really just wants his newfound father's attention and validation.

Bill Denbrough -> unclaimed. In the canon his parents got really neglectful after death of their younger child, and I think Bill being the only unclaimed in the group could somehow tackle him feeling ignored and not cared about. Also, only unclaimed in the group screams main character energy to me, and what is Billy if not a main character energy lol. Before he got to chb he met a younger demigod, Georgie (son of Posaidon bc of his love for boats perhaps). Before they managed to get to the camp Georgie died which left Bill completely devastated. His first friend is Eddie, they met in the Hermes cabin.

Eddie Kaspbrak -> son of Hermes, as he loves means of transportation and essentially is the losers' guide during their adventures (thx again for the help @asexualasshat!) When growing up, Eddie really struggled with his adhd and dyslexia, mostly because his mother would call him out for it all the time. For her it was yet another sickness of his, and since she couldn't heal it really, she treated Eddie like he was broken. She died in a monster attack before Eddie went to chb, otherwise I don't think he would ever get the chance to get to the camp. Since her death happened before Eddie could ever stand up to her, or at least realize she's in the wrong, Eds started putting her on a pedestal after she died. (He has yet to learn a lot among his friends!) During his first months in the camp, Eddie resented his brothers and sisters for their mischievous nature and love for pranks. He also hated suddenly living with so many people. He met Richie through his siblings, as Richie was friends with many of them. They didn't really get along at first lol. Bill is his first true friend. Eds' power is unusual sense of direction.

Mike Hanlon -> at first I wanted to make him a Demeter kid bc he lives on a farm, but I think I'm going with Hephaestus and let me explain why. In the movie canon his house burned down with his parents still inside, making Mike an orphan. Wouldn't it be just so angsty if Mike had fire powers, similarly to Leo Valdez from HoO? Brilliant angst potential. Let him find out the death of his parents had been his fault all along. Or maybe it's never been the case, maybe it's just what he's told by some villain? Also he's pretty smart and very hardworking, which are very Hephaestus kid traits. I think his grandpa could actually tell him about his demigod origins, since he was the only adult in IT canon that suspected something was Wrong with the town and shared it with his grandkid.

Ben Hanscom -> son of Athena obviously. Also, since in the canon we only meet his mom, in this au he now has two moms yay! His human mum was kinda toxic tho, basically she was a toned down version of Sonia Kaspbrak, just like in the book canon. Ben is a great architect and a major nerd. He quickly befriends Stanley, it's his first friend. Has even less hope for romancing Bev than in IT canon, as she's one of the Aphrodite kids, aka hottest people at the camp known for being heartbreakers. Bev adores the fact that he never sexualizes her and actually admires her other qualities, it draws her closer to him. Though he usually appeares sweet and calm, he can be a very fierce warrior if one of his friends is in danger.

Stanley Uris -> another not so obvious one. For now I'm going with Athena, bc of his intelligence and love for birds (here owls specifically). I want him to be able to communicate with owls, I know Athena kids usually do not display any powers, but I want to give Stan some cool abilities. I think it would be intersting to explore how finding out about greek gods affected his faith. I'm giving him an identity crisis over this yay. His dad definitely kept chb secret from him, as he wanted his son to follow in his footsteps and lead a normal life as rabbi. Stan is a great strategist, not so great on the battlefield, hates violence in any form. Ben is his favourite sibling. He's the Common Sense source in the group.

[kendrixtermina]

Assorted House of Feanor Thoughts

I wrote this as a reply to someone, but then realized that this should be a post of its own. 

Line between extrapolation, interpretation & headcanon is going to be fluid here

Long post under cut

The seven sons in general:

all moody, fierce, intense and brilliant, each in various different ways

none of them can really stand to be cooped up in one place for long

F R E C K L E S you will not convince me otherwise

Apart from the ones explicitly described as pretty (ie, Maedhros and Celegorm) they’re actually relatively plain by elf standards, or at least sort of rugged-looking, especially compared to their part-Vanyar cousins - I mean, figures that some would turn out more like Miriel or Nerdanel both of which were supposedly more average.

all are very resourceful having spent most of their lives helping out with their parent’s projects, exploring the wilderness, or (save for Celegorm) hanging out in Aule’s halls. Most can probably whip up a steampunk or magitech solution to basic war-related problems

Because of this they’re a very tight-knit group

growing up, they did not know many children their age; Ironically the most contact they had was with their cousins because Feanor paid semi-regular visits to Finwe. Apart from Turgon (and Orodreth if you place him in the second rather than the third post-journey generation) the cousins really dug the adventure stories. (Galadriel pretended not to be interested and offered plenty of critiques, but listened anyways)

more survival skills and just a lot more casual than your average princes

They’d all been adults for a good while by the time of the rebellion; the twins are a tad older than Aredhel, Galadriel and Argon; Caranthir and Angrod are about the same age. Curufin is younger than Aegnor.

They all look back at that trip to the lightless shore of the outer sea as a cherished family memory

Also I don’t think Feanor disciplined his sons very much after all his own father let him get away with everything. In his eyes the brats can do no wrong especially not Curufin and to a lesser extent Amrod Nerdanel tried her best to counterbalance this and it kind of worked on some of them, but the three middle ones were a lost cause

I think a lot of the weight behind the oath comes from how Feanor made them promise him to see it through on his deathbed. It was his literal last wish.

Maedhros:

The Leader™, the most strong-willed and the deadliest fighter by a huge margin. What the orc under your bed has nightmares about.

Obviously a very competent diplomat, strategist, and the sort to put constructive results over personal glory; resilient, formidable, unpretentious and tough as leather

but not at all overconfident, and the type who is not blind to the flaws of the people he loves. He knows very well that Feanor wasn’t perfect and does many things that his father would not have agreed with - at the same time he has a strong sense of obligation, honor and loyalty which turns out to be his fatal flaw in the end when being loyal and keeping his word  increasingly requires him to do dishonorable things

if there was a definite breaking point it was the fiasco with Dior’s sons

Stoic but courteous and eloquent; From Finwe’s death onwards increasingly grim, grizzled and not very hopeful, though he’s the sort to give his all and try to be noble even when there’s no reward or even thanks or respect.

Despite this, he has as a dry sense of humor and at times uses it to defuse tense situations or disarm people he’s negotiating with (see the scene with Thingol’s message) - does have a streak of gallows humor to him especially after the Thangorodrim incident

As the heir Feanor actually let him in on trade secrets and scientific speculation; Their relationship is probably the most equal; I do think Feanor was capable of actually appreciating that Maedhros got a mind of his own and isn’t afraid to stand up for himself. Feanor values independent thought, even if he’s not always good at really living that value with his tendency to take things personally and see others as taking sides for or against him.  

Can’t really craft stuff to the same degree without his right hand. He then focussed on more abstract/mental pursuits which were perhaps his forte, to begin with but it still bothers him more than he lets on, especially since he still retains, or swiftly regained, his skill at making things dead. 

He may or may not qualify as a cinnamon roll but he definitely looks like could kill you

Maglor:

Maedhros might have been the token responsible sibling, but Maglor was the understanding, comforting one and always had a nurturing streak - hence why he was the one to take in the kids.

Sensitive Artistic Type™ - goes from quirky and passionate back in Valinor to melancholy & tormented as the war drags on

one of those people who despair over & get self-critical over their work even when it’s regarded as masterpieces

Like Feanor and Miriel before him, he tends to get super absorbed in his work/art and just plain disappears for days

Now some ppl hold that he didn’t start having second thoughts until near the end, but judging from how he comes along to Fingolfin’s party or to hang out with Finrod, I’d hold that he was always ‘the nice/gentle one’, but not solely in a positive way; Unlike Maedhros he did not stand up to Feanor about the thing with the ships and indeed lets Maedhros talk him out of turning himself in at the very end, so he’s probably somewhat lacking in assertiveness

Even so, he’s probably one of the better fighters, given the difficult territory he gets, that he’s the one to kill Ulfang, and how long he survives. He probably feels ambivalent about this. 

I imagine him having an agility-based fighting style

Probably codified the heroic epos as a specifically Noldorin art form

Celegorm:

A lot of ppl focus on the barbarian aspect, but I’d say he actually has some degree of ‘subverted prince charming’ going on, with how he sweet-talks Luthien at first before throwing her in the dungeon, and how he seems to have been one of the more accomplished ones, joining a respected order and all

He’s actually pretty elegant and perhaps playfully gallant, but it’s a facade; He’s an animal underneath; though his instincts are probably somewhat nobler than what ends up happening when he gets roped into Curufin’s schemes

usually, the first to react and leap into action when something happens.

Herculean strength, daunting presence

also a fairly efficient general, if a bit of a glory hound and pretty fearless in the pursuit of victory

very much has an ego and doesn’t like being humbled at all

Strikes me as the sort of person who would take badly to the realization that they can no longer return to the glory of the past or being judged unworthy, not that he’d respond with anything but defiance

Wrestles giant monsters barehanded

Always low-key wished to fight creatures of darkness before the rebellion to test his might against them; Orome and the Maiar members of the hunt would have told stories of them

though he gets his pretty face from Daddy, his strong build comes from Nerdanel, possibly somewhat accentuated by his being a dude

Caranthir:

grumpy, moody, no filter, likes his alone time, shows his feelings mostly through actions, also somewhat pragmatic

the quartermaster; Actually one of the smarter ones, if not outright the second smartest after Curufin, though he has more a logistic/administrative sort of intelligence

generally one of the more prosaic, practical family members, or maybe he’s just more subtle about his dramatic side or has a harder time expressing it. Definitely has Hidden Dephts™

I mean, putting your hideout on the slope of a mountain near a deep, dark lake circled by mountains? Goth AF. A+ aesthetic there.

Hosts the family get-togethers at his fortress. Has most certainly shoved Celegorm and Curufin in the lake at some point

has a certain respect for strength, valor and skill even in ppl he doesn’t necessarily like; Not at all diplomatic or polite, but also not finicky or fastidious, so actually forged a whole lot of alliances on a “everyone’s money/swords are equally good and we don’t have to set conditions” basis and seems to have been pretty successful at this

started out haughty but definitely learned to be more open-minded/ broaden his horizon over his time in Beleriand - but as no good deed goes unpunished, Ulfang happens

Whereas Curufin and Celegorm can put up a noble veneer but will totally stab you in the back if provoked, Caranthir’s sort of the opposite, in that he’s rude and quarrelsome on first contact but has a good heart deep down (see the Haladin incident) and doesn’t keep grudges long term once he’s done grumbling where Celegorm is sore loser and Curufin a spiteful twerp.

though personally, I don’t see Caranthir as trying to reign himself in. He wouldn’t really be known as “the harshest” in that case. Who was gonna teach him to behave himself, Feanor maybe? kek. 

Curufin:

We have a lot of actual dialogue & description for him - he has this characteristic little defiant smile, is often coldly contemptuous in tone, some level of ruthless pragmatism

has mild/vague foresight - nothing as impressive as what Finrod and Galadriel have, but he has it more or less to the degree that Feanor did.

actually pretty insightful, thought-through and political-minded in some ways, too bad he shares Feanor’s tendency for unwarranted suspicion and factionalism, as well as a tendency to just act on his own without checking with anyone

always either filthy from work or fully blinged-out and impeccably groomed, no in-between

more calculated and subtle than Feanor - not that Feanor ever needed calculation or subtlety since he could get by on sheer awe or intimidation. Celegorm and Maedhros have that same quality in spades and Curufin’s a little bit jealous

Not actually that much older than the twins, but always acted older than his age, especially once he heard that Feanor was the same

collects weapons, loves fancy horses, the most traditionally aristocratic of the seven

Got married relatively young; saw it as a matter of honor to further his family’s line

continued his scholarly pursuits in Beleriand; this is part of why he elected to share a territory with Celegorm

The last Celebrimbor ever heard of him was a magically sealed box filled with research notes he sent out in case he didn’t make it out alive

Did not take his parents’ estrangement well and is stubbornly salty toward Nerdanel (though deep down he misses her as much as his brothers if not more)

Frequently the Bad Influence/ Shoulder Devil to his brothers.

But when he gets excited about his research/craft he’s got this “exited cocky little boy” side to him that’s surprisingly pure. 

Only Nerdanel and possibly Celebrimbor’s mom are allowed to call him ‘Atarinke.’ His brothers might still use it when they’re teasing or scolding him. 

The Twins:

Every time a fic does something else with them than “generic prankster redheads” I cry with joy

We don’t have that many data points on them, but most of them suggest they’re every bit as fierce as their brothers

they’re somewhat aloof & mostly do their own thing;

As kids they’d mostly sit in a corner and play with each other. Possibly deliberately played up their identicalness as a kind of emo fashion statement / to fuck with people (”Should we do this Ambarussa?” - ”I don’t know, what do you think, Ambarussa?”)

never really gave up their semi-nomadic ways

Compared to Celegorm they probably more on stealth and precision than strength and bravado. They suddenly appear in front of you, and bam! You’ve got an arrow poking out of your face. Probably the ones scouting the perimeter of the camp.

Amras is a bit sassier, but it’s actually Amrod who’s a little bit braver.

Hardly ever argued until their parents’ estrangement; That led to quite a few quarrels between them.

For all his faults, Feanor made a point of doing things with each of them individually.

quietly nursing some level of pent-up despair and frustration until they push for the assault on Sirion

In the version where one of them dies, and then no one ever talks about it, - I imagine that the remaining one ended up cynical in a “let’s just get it ever with we’re already doomed after all’ kind of way

Bonus:

Celebrimbor

“Curiosity killed the cat but the second mouse gets the cheese” incarnate. He’s a sweet, excitable,  deeply good guy, but Curiosity is the strongest force within him, besides maybe “think of the potential”

very bold in his thinking, not held back by any conventional boundaries. This is partially why he ended up more independent than his father and uncles but ironically that might in a sense make him more similar to grandpa than any of them

Really looks like Feanor. Like, Arwen and Luthien level of resemblance. It takes ppl a bit to notice because of how different his general demeanor and surface-level personality is. 

Very scattered and absent-minded, prone to sudden flashes of inspiration, often shows up in some form of disarray

spent his adolescence at Formenos. Retained a certain affinity for wintery places ever since

He sensed something fishy about Sauron before long, but between wanting to avoid the family propensity for unwarranted suspicion and being tempted by all the possibilities of what he could do with that power/knowledge even if it did come from a fishy source, he didn’t act before it was too late - he can't have been fully clueless since he hid the three; There was definitely just a bit of actual seduction/forbidden fruit appeal in place there, whether to use the word “hubris” probably depends on your philosophy. 

He drops the ‘th’ once he renounces Curufin, but slips right back into the old habit when excited or exasperating. At some point during his rule of Eregion, he stops bothering to hide it - A similar thing happens when he’s talking Sindarin with his northeast Beleriand accent. 

I know this is a very popular old hat headcanon, but... His other name is also “Curufinwe”. Everyone called him Telperinquar from the start, lest all three come running and grumble about being distracted from work, but after the Nargothrond debacle, he had other reasons for not using it. But really, Telperinquar/Celebrimbor is just another more metaphorical way to say “this baby shall be good at working with his hands” so yeah

My HC for where he was between the Finrod incident and the second age is as follows: He departed for war with Gwindor’s troupe (this is someone who tried to engineer a way around entropy - not a “do nothing” sort of guy) and fled the battlefield with Turgon. (hence some of the passages that place him in Gondolin can still be made to work. He totally made Earendil’s baby-sized mail coat) He fled with Idril’s party. Had she not tipped him off somehow he would probably have died with the rest of the smith’s guild. Or perhaps he grabbed all the valuable records he could find and ran for it because someone needed to preserve them. As living surrounded by the survivors of Doriath would have been awkward to say the least, he went to the isle of Balar to offer his skills and service to Gil-Galad. This is where he befriended/ reconnected with Galadriel and Celeborn. 

Finrod once told him the “faithful stone” legend from Brethil. It would be an inspiration to him much later. Generally credits Finrod with being a good influence on him. 

Judging by the stars on the doors of Durin his stance on his family probably softened over the years. He essentially attained their original new dream of exploring distant lands and building unparalleled new realms, at least for a while - also definitely has a similar “screw destiny!”/ “I defy you stars!” attitude. Perhaps he wanted to see their vision done right. 

But on some level, I think he also wanted to associate himself with their fame eventually especially once his own accomplishments grew. His feelings were probably always very ambiguous because he must have admired and envied their great works but also lived getting weird looks whenever he did what he’s best at and loves doing most in the world because it associates him with these very ambiguous people whom many hated... at one point in the past he must have really admired his father and grandfather, I mean, he came with them across the sea. 

Nerdanel

She got Feanor the apprenticeship / gave him the idea after they met on their travels. 

Were seen as something of an eccentric hippie/ hipster couple in the early days

She’s tough, confident and definitely quipped/ yelled back at times. Definitely described as ‘strong-willed’ and individual. Like this was a ‘kindred spirits’ thing before everything went to hell

it counts for something that even during the ugly bitter parting scene the worst Feanor could say was “someone must’ve turned you against me because you definitely cared once” rather than “you’re a traitor” for all that everything else in that scene made him very punchable

Their relationship dynamic, as I see it, is that she’s the one person who just sees and treats him like a normal dude. No apprehension, no fawning. He’s not “the greatest” or a tainted aberration to her, he’s simply a like-minded friend. So she’s pretty chill about his idiosyncrasies and doesn’t see them as a big deal, but on the other hand, she’s not overawed and will not take bullshit

Since she is good at understanding people she probably usually gets where he’s coming from even when he’s not being reasonable

possibly invented abstract art; was most certainly influential. 

the elves who serve Aule probably have their own little traditions. She might’ve imparted some of those on her descendants

Also ppl tend to forget that she also does metalwork. Again, it’s quite possible that she got him into it and that if they’d never met, he might have landed in a completely different discipline

I think it says a lot about Feanor that he chose her for being smart, creative and independent-minded. It shows that he actually values these things and that it’s not just a rhetorical device;  he’s not a hypocrite, he failed at what he was genuinely trying to aim for. 

She had Finwe won over the moment she mentioned that she likes children. To Feanor’s chagrin, she proclaimed that his then-tiny half-siblings were the cutest thing ever but since he was trying to impress Nerdanel, he actually kept his composure there. 

She was totally buds with Earwen and Anaire. 

I really like those fics where she played some part in the reconstruction efforts. She’s already renowned for her wisdom and has some familiarity with the court, so why wouldn’t Finarfin make her an advisor? 

Miriel

She was described as having “silver” hair like what the teleri sometimes have, but that was for lack of a better world. It’s actually pretty close to pure white. It was an unprecedented anomaly. Celegorm got it. Though overall Maglor might be the one who most looks like her. Or maybe Caranthir. 

Well, her tendency to refuse to eat her words no matter what has certainly proven highly heritable

Canonically one of those ppl who talks very fast 

Feanor doesn’t look very much like her at all, but he talks like her and is similar in his body language etc. The shape of her hands, however, has made it all the way to Celebrimbor in an unbroken line. Maglor’s got em too. 

She was the only one of her family to make the great journey. That’s why “the names of her kin are not recorded”. You see, they tried to convince her not to go, and that only made her more determined. 

Miriel and Indis used to have this thing where Miriel would sing while Indis plays the instrument. First time Indis caught Maedhros and Fingon doing something similar she got very emotional about it. She told them how she and Miriel also used to have a sort of odd friendship despite their opposite looks and personalities. Maedhros had at this point never even heard that they used to be friends. She proceeded to tell him some fun stories from Miriel’s youth and encouraged the two to spend time together. 

We’re told that Miriel and Finwe only got together in Valinor; Since Indis had a thing for him since before the Vanyar moved out of Tirion it’s fully possible that Indis actually liked him first. Maybe she actually introduced them to each other, like she wasn't confident enough to ask him on a date so she brought her friend, only for the two to be immediately smitten with each other. Poor Indis decided that she had no chance and moved out of town when Ingwe did. 

Miriel definitely expresses her love/admiration in the way of “You! You’re perf! I must make art of you!”

Since his arrival in the halls of Mandos, Feanor has made several of Vaire’s Maiar cry with his critique of their tapestries, but he holds that his mom’s are best. 

Feanor himself

In general, I hold that while he said many things that were not right, there’s a lot of what he prophecied that was not quite wrong and does come true in a kind of way, even if not necessarily for himself and his family. They sort of pave the way as Promethean figures. The second mouse gets the cheese (it’s usually some Nolofinwean)

Though he’s also the ultimate example of “you are not immune to propaganda”. Literally the smartest man in the world; Still touchy enough to be an easy mark for emotional manipulation. 

I think a lot of ff undersells what a polymath he must’ve been and that part where he worked on many different topics and was “the most learned”. 

You know the type of author who has a bazillion unfinished wips going and jumps wildly from topic to topic? Feanor’s research notes are exactly like that, especially the tendency to disintegrate into cryptic jottings and notes right before the most interesting part.  Just like the unfinished texts from HoMe Just like Gauss or Euler, having invented everything a hundred years ahead and 40% more discoveries buried that he never felt ready to publish. (I can also definitely see the sons – especially Maedhros and Curufin – spending the better part of the siege of Angband compiling some of it into a presentable format. Celebrimbor would then be the one to stumble upon implications /corollaries that had somehow been missed for thousands of years. 

For all that I enjoy fics where they’re all smoll and adorable as much as the next person, canonically we’re given every indication that he was an adolescent or young adult by the time the remarriage occurred. The published silm has him “well-nigh full-grown” by the time Indis started having kids; In the HoME passage detailing the romantic meeting on the mountain it’s said that he was “wandering in the mountains” (ie, old enough to do so on his own) at the time. He moved out as soon as he could, so he and his half-siblings never actually spent any significant time in the same household

I mean, he reacted like a teenager would, and IMHO neither his character nor Finwe’s make any sense if this wasn’t a single parent situation early on. 

Personally, I really don’t like that headcanon that he was nicer to the sisters for no reason. I don’t think his relationship with Fingolfin was ever much better than the sort of “awkwardly tolerating” we saw at the reconciliation scene; At the same time, I don’t think things would ever have escalated to that degree if Melkor hadn’t gone mucking things up. 

In the same vein, I don’t think he always had beef with the Valar. He used to hang out in Aule’s halls and let Celegorm study with Orome after all and studied their language. - he certainly seems to have had some romanticism for the Hither Lands evident in his speeches, he traveled far past the well-lit areas, made crystals that shine in starlight etc. so he was probably always somewhat independent-minded and he certainly knew, better than anyone, that the Valar are imperfect and can’t fix everything (they couldn’t heal Miriel after all) - but it’s a long way from healthy skepticism and understandable disappointment to asserting bad intentions where there are none. 

There’s a long way between not wanting a relationship with someone, and pointing stabby objects at them. Feanor was always difficult and never the type of person to be easily satisfied but at the same time, he clearly had his “delight” in his work and life as it was pre-Melkor. He could’ve gone on as an inventor and author of strongly worded opinion pieces; perhaps the elves were even “meant” to go back & come into contact with the Edain for a brief while, just without all the murder. 

The thing about Melkor’s lies is that they made a complicated situation conveniently easy in a way that he (and Fingolfin!) would want to believe. It’s not really either of their fault that they both exist, but if your rival is actually out to get you then suddenly all your negative feelings are justified 

Personally, I don’t think it the remarriage made that much of a difference - Miriel would still be dead. What Feanor’s really mad at is the inherent unfairness of the world. But he can’t fix or fight that, so in a misfire of his engineer’s mindset that thinks in terms of simple cause and effect and wants the world to be logical and controllable, he blamed something tangible (Indis.)

I think Melkor hates him so much because he’s kinda what Melkor wishes he was or likes to think he is. They’re both the mightiest of their respective kinds and don’t really fit in, but Feanor’s actually extremely creative. He goes and does his own thing, and maybe errs in overlooking that no man is an island and that all works are built on those of others, but, look at Melkor who wants all the scale of a group project but none of the “cooperation” part and basically can’t make anything of his own. “You’re like me, yet you’re successful? I cannot allow it!” 

In a sense you have classic Satan and Miltonian satan in the same setting, and they can’t stand each other

[ualscout]

Captain's Log: No One

I did roughly 8 hours of field research for this project. If that doesn’t show how hyped I was, I don’t know what does. 

We were told to go to the British Museum to take notes and sketches of artifacts that interested us. We’d then incorporate our research into our first animatic by centering/including the artifact in a story. The British Museum is a pretty fukken big museum, host to artifacts from cultures all over the world. I was gonna be there a while. 

My first area of interest was the Ancient Egypt section. Even thought it was packed, I took a lot of sketches and notes on stuff I could picture as the centerpiece of a story- a means of congregating or hosting. For instance, a lot of libations bowls that would be used by many people a day who visited a temple took my interest, or the towering sarcophagi that looked way too big for only one person. I initially didn’t want the artifact to become the character, but to assist the characters interacting with it. That way, I could tell a story around it. 

My next stop was the Ancient Greece section. As a kid, I knew everything about greek mythos. It’s a religion not only with multiple gods, but fatally flawed gods is so interesting to me. I took a lot of notes, but most of the notes ended up being around the story as opposed to the aesthetic of the artifact. The Greeks shared an area with the Romans, so I took some notes there as well. I moved onto Ancient Asia. There was a lot of interesting material, I liked to look at the jade crystal carvings and imagine the cronch from biting down on one. They had interesting masks, but not too much stood out to me in there. As I spent more time in the museum, the more monotonous everything got. I don’t think it’s the cultures being repetitive, but it does show how humanity fixates on very similar topics, even beyond cultural barriers. Kind of like parallel evolution. Where I really started to find my spark was Ancient Europe and Scandinavia. Aesthetically and mythologically, I love vikings. Pagan traditions are really cool as well, it all just seems so foreign to me (we don’t learn much about it in American schools). Stuff was interesting me again, but nothing was really catching my eye… Until I was being ushered out of the museum at closing time. I saw a deer skull, the antlers still attached, with holes drilled in.

It was from Star Carr. Made of red deer skull, it served as a headpiece and is among the oldest evidences of shamanic religion. It seemed so unsettling in an ancient and earthy way on its own, the idea of someone wearing it intrigued me. Coming home, I started on three base ideas to bring into class. The first was using an ancient viking mirror as a gateway between an eldritch horror and a young adult who’s distant grandmother just passed away and received the mirror as inheritance… except the eldritch horror acts like an elderly guy with clearly racist beliefs but trying to seem like he doesn’t. They talk by fogging up the mirror and writing. 

The second was two people arguing over who would win in a fight: a person on horseback or a centaur. Inspired by the fact that any times centaurs are featured in art, they’re always fighting a human. Even after writing a rough script for it, I don’t know who would win. 

The last idea was using the mask I found. I liked the idea of it holding an ancient spirit tasked with protecting a humanity that has long since forgotten its existence. I also liked the idea of it being able to possess other living creatures. Not sure if I wanted it to be horror or not, but it would certainly be unsettling. You can probably tell which idea I went with. 

Today, we wrote a script. This is the only area I have any expertise in. My script ended up being 10 or so pages of screen direction and character building, but I finished the dialogue as well. 

The story follows three hikers who venture into some Scandinavian woods on a backpacking trip. Haak is the most serious and the leader, he has the most survival skills out of the group. Maya is the prankster of the crew, but is just as experienced as Haak. Robyn is the physically weakest character, often scared by everything and unnerved by the surroundings. The characters leave their car and enter the woods, but not before trying to make sense of the cryptic writing on the worn and torn trailhead. Robyn is the only one who seems to pay any mind to it. As the group start, a narrator that could be Robyn starts speaking about “tales for a trip through the woods.” The tips start out as actual advice one would use for a backpacking trip, like packing extra food and always having a map, but slowly get more cryptic and unsettling. The characters make their way through the assortment of settings in the woods, focusing more on the nature around them instead of what the group is doing. As the tips get more cryptic, saying stuff like “it may seem like the trees are following you, they’re just keeping an eye on you” and “be grateful you don’t know what’s under the dirt, pray you never find out,” the forest seems to retaliate against the characters. For instance, they get lost and double cross an area they’ve already been in, get haunted by the eyes on the birch trees, and more. Eventually, it all leads up to a normal bear attack being an Ursa Major, a bear with stars in its pelt and no need to hold a solid corporeal form. Haak and Maya get struck down by the bear after supposedly subduing it. As it’s coming for Robyn, Robyn backs up into the form that was following from beginning. The head is out of shot, but it puts a strange headpiece on Robyn, and allows Robyn to fight back against the bear. Once the fight is over, Robyn is faced with the ancient spirit who saved them- a towering, scraggly figure made of twigs and forest materials. It’s creepy to look at, and was framed at the start to be the creature tormenting the group. The creature reaches out and touches Robyn’s forehead, using their body to say verbally “no one believes in you, you should believe in yourself, too.” In Robyn’s voice. The next scene happens where the group dropped the car off, Haak blinking back to consciousness. Somehow, Robyn saved them, and Haak passes out again knowing they’ll be okay. Help arrives as Robyn looks back at No One for the final time as the spirit disappears into the forest. 

The idea is how humans have interacted with and continue to interact with nature. The reality is the forest provides, but it does not protect. People putting faith in the old gods to protect them is a tradition long dead with history, but the idea of this god still holding onto life for the soul purpose of protecting those who may wander into its domain is a very human story, even if it’s behind a creepy mask with origins we don’t entirely understand. It’s inspired by my love of hiking and nature, I actually work in the summer as a camp counselor at a ranch that takes our campers backpacking on the weekends. Each of the human characters show some kind of recurring theme I see in the people I go on these hikes with, and some are named after them. I think drawing the sets and characters for this will be pretty fun, I look forward to it. 

Character design is up next. I started with Robyn, the rest of the characters would follow in style. 

I wanted Robyn to have a very childish look, but not dumb childish. Like a smart bookworm who has no idea how to survive outside a library, much less civilization. However, Robyn couldn’t look like they thrived in society either. They should be a shy nerd who’s out of their element everywhere, not just in the wild, which just makes being in the outdoors that much more terrible. I also wanted Robyn to come off as genderless so anyone could relate to them. The story isn’t about their gender or age (even though in cannon the characters are in college/university/living on their own, but the style still makes them look like children… oh well) it’s about the forest and how they interact with it. 

I had a hard time getting a grip on the style I wanted, everything seemed so forced and I was never happy with what I drew. I kept erasing and redoing and changing without keeping anything. About halfway through the day, I was still only half a character sketch page done and feeling quite hopeless. I realized I was trying to be perfect on a sheet that wasn’t supposed to be. It Sucked… but I figured out the style I wanted. The t-shirt and swishy basketball shorts is the epitome of beginner hiker attire. I stopped caring so much about the quality of the drawings and just started drawing action poses. 

The next most important character would be No One. I had a lot more fun playing with No One’s design, probably because I didn’t have to make it look human. I wanted to make them look imposing, scary, but made of the environment. Like, with clothes of moss and litchin. Almost stitched together. I played with making them tall, wider, hunched over, in layers. The hardest choice I had to make was the horn shape. I pulled a lot of references from different horned creatures even though the original skull was a red deer. 

Eventually, I came up with final designs for both. I made up Haak and Maya while storyboarding, their designs were simple and based on real people, like their personalities. No worries ‘bout that. Their character models followed the base Robyn’s exploration found. 

Next, storyboarding. I spent so much goddamn time in storyboarding. Not too much happened, but I did like plotting out everything. I realized I can pretty easily plot out the setting and where the characters are in relation to each other then manipulate the camera as needed. Pretty nifty. The only problem is 1. Im bad at drawing and 2. Drawing the same thing over and over again kinda sucks. I spent a lot of time designing the varying backgrounds the characters would walk through and played with how the forest would interact with them. For instance, what if a path suddenly changed or wasn’t visible on the second cross through? What if you could see the reflections of eyes in the cave shadows before the characters entered? 

The idea originally started over the summer. I was hiking through a birch forest and noticed the markings on the white bark looked a lot like eyes… what if they were watching while you passed by? I let this fuel my imagination and inspire the script. I liked playing with where mystery or malice could hide in the forest, which is a lot of places. Sure, people generally feel threatened by the animals, but the terrain is arguably more dangerous. I didn’t want to introduce a wildlife enemy until the climax, or it would just make it less impactful. If a wild animal is revealed to be evil, it gives another face to the force tormenting them, which takes away from the little cameo No One gets at the start. 

Nothing really important happened over the storyboarding period. Just little epiphanies. I realized I got better at drawing the characters and much quicker at it as time went on. I spent a lot of time editing shots and order, which is why the storyboards are messy AF. Made me feel kind of self conscious because everyone at my table had works of art for storyboards, but whatever. They’re supposed to be tools. I also made the very stupid choice to go over every single goddamn board in digital. It was hell. Next time, I’ll probably do everything digitally… 

Capturing audio was hard not only because of the location but because of the season. For instance, I need cricket sounds, nature sounds, car sounds (that I could control), and quiet crisp sounds. Too bad I go to school and live on a street that’s triangulated by a fire station, police station, and hospital. And everyone seems to be lighting things on fire, getting crimed, or dying. 

I got what sounds I could, but I had a fun time recording with everyone. It was the first time the class was forced out of their comfort zones and made to talk to the people outside their tables. It was a welcome change and I met some cool people. We would talk about what sounds we needed in our stories and whenever we realized how to get that sound it was a group epiphany with excitement. Too bad nowhere in Camberwell is quiet. 

Instead of having one of them narrate my lines, I just did them myself at home with my own microphone. It was just easier because I knew what tone I wanted this character to be. In terms of pitch, I just edited it in Audacity. The quality of it didn’t matter, because it wasn’t supposed to be exactly human. I played with it being lower pitched, but if I wanted to make it seem like Robyn was the real narrator, I would need it to be higher. It sounds pretty close to what I wanted- hollow, indifferent, but all-knowing and wise beyond the years the voice should belong to. 

I knew from the start I wanted one of two songs in the soundtrack, even though Joe said no songs… sorry, but I envisioned it with this music, it wasn’t structured around it but it was structured with it. Both are the instrumentals behind the songs, so there’s no words, but I did make a playlist of music I wanted to inspire this animatic with at the start. Both songs were at the top. The first song is “Welcome Home, Son” by Radical Face. It’s got a steady beat, good organic guitar, piano, and what sounds like bells. It’s got a REI feel to it (and I’m realizing now that you don’t know what REI is, probably… but I’m keeping the comparison because it’s true) which is kind of like adventuring somewhere greater than yourself, understanding the greatness of it, being slightly scared of it. Like you’re on a quest with no destination. Like facing the mortality and insignificance of yourself in this vast and wondrous world, but instead of fleeing in fear or rejecting the fear, accepting it and finding a home in it. The background vocals add to the feeling of humanity that’s not quite ‘human’ but when tested it tended to mess up the dialogue. The sound of bells and wind chimes was nice, like a feeling of emptiness or forgotten home. Just all around a great song. Also there’s a wind sound effect, like it’s blowing through the trees outside the mouth of a cave. I just think it’s neat and put it at the beginning. 

The other song was “New Slang” by The Shins. It has a similar feeling to “Welcome Home, Son” but not quite as adventurous. Much like the song lyrics say, “Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth, only I don’t know how they got out, dear…” it’s about returning home with a bittersweet feeling, somewhere you don’t quite belong, but desperately want to. The simple guitar strumming and bass feel melancholy, and the calm electric guitar (never thought I’d say that pair of words together) just make it seem like an amble through the old woods in the backyard of your childhood home, visiting the old treehouse, and sitting in it alone as you remember back to when you weren’t alone in it and much smaller. The simplicity of the song adds less of a dramatic tone and a more organic and realistic one. It’s also more comforting than “Welcome Home, Son” due to less swells and changes in the sounds. It also has background vocals, but they’re much more human and less dramatic, they almost sound like a mourning wolf separated from his pack, but his calls go unanswered. The thing is the runtime is 1/2 that of “Welcome Home, Son”… The middle section, when edited, made up about 4 minutes. 

I played with both and enjoyed both results a lot. The music starts as they enter the forest and the narration starts, following them as they go on their adventure. It’s supposed to show that time’s passing like a montage, but also ends up showing how the danger is real and haunting when Ursa Major awakens in the bear. 

My biggest issue while editing the animatic was sound design after the music cuts out. It ends at the perfect moment and even follows the story beats of the end, but after that I just had the haunting silence of the forest and the sound of the nature around the characters in which I had to put a dramatic fight scene. I didn’t want to bring the music back until No One revealed themselves to Robyn to show the connection had finally been made, but the fight scene between Robyn and Ursa Major was so empty… It felt like I was just layering bear grunts and damage sounds over dynamic shots, but it wasn’t translating as tense, it was just awkward. I also had trouble with selecting what sounds were real. Robyn doesn’t make any verbal sound, the only sound to come from Robyn is their footfalls and how they interact with the environment. I should have made more steady rules with how Robyn and the other characters are present outside of the middle montage.  

Actually while I’m writing this I realized I could restart the music and have it cut back out once No One takes back their face… fuck.

So, what did I learn from this? That I storyboarded way too fucking much and made way too many fucking characters. I was told all throughout diagnostic to be free and reach for the stars, especially in communication, but the reality is in trying to tell the story I wanted I ended up drowning myself in work. 

I really loved writing this story, though. That’s my favorite part of anything. Writing is the ONLY skill I have over everyone else, and I WILL flex on everyone when I get the chance. It was just too big of a story for right now. I mean, I got everything from a single deer skull, it didn’t seem like much at the time… Maybe when I’m better at all of this, I’ll revisit it and make it more like I pictured in my head. I felt like epiphanies kept coming to me as I was writing the script, but as time went on and I had to plan it, I would get too caught up in the details. I love preproduction though. Like, a lot. That’s for sure my favorite part of making animation and film. Just figuring out where everything goes and how it all works together is just so satisfying and I really enjoy it. A bonus is it doesn’t have to look like Perfect Art, either. The fact that it doesn’t look perfect is one of my greatest insecurities, but it’s something I’ll have to get over, and it’s easier to get over it if it’s forgivable/expected. I know once we do actual animation, it’ll just be harder to make longer stories and I won’t know how to cut down on it all… but whatever. I’ve always had a problem writing too much, so that’s just something I’ll have to learn to manage. I’ll try and do better next time. I was really tempted to make this a comedy, like I always do, but I didn’t. I made something serious for once, and it didn’t end up as I imagined, but it got close enough. 

That’s a victory Royale.